Steph Liyanage: So welcome back to Vitalify Unplugged.
Gry Stene: Suzanne, you speak so beautifully about self-care, not being selfish, but essential. Why do you think that so many women still struggle to give themselves what they need? Hey hey, it's your friend Gris, intuitive AI and tech whisperer, 60 plus, full throttle and torque energy bunny, chasing fun, fairness and freedom. If woman listening has spent years measuring her life by productivity, performance and how much she gives to everyone else.
Steph Liyanage: And I'm Steph, holistic nurse, soulful scribbler, magnetic mama, dancing through midlife with truth, magic and messy wild-hearted freedom. So today we're opening the season with a question that sounds simple, but can change everything once you sit with it. And that is, what does a wealthy life really mean now? Because many women in midlife, Huge question.
Susanne Ridolfi: Thank you. Thank you, that is a huge question. So we spoke about that earlier now. Sometimes I think it is how we are brought up ourselves, our own mothers, if you like. So how can say that? We are, and women are both, we are both human beings, right? But we're different species at the same time.
Gry Stene: What if wealth was about how fully she gets to be herself?
Susanne Ridolfi: Is that the question for me? That's big question.
Gry Stene: That is a question for you. Yeah, in two minutes or less.
Susanne Ridolfi: And I think women, in my experience, I can only speak from my own experience, women have more of the nurturing quality within us. That's what we do automatically.
Steph Liyanage: Hahaha! the old markers of success start to feel a little thin. Achievement, productivity, doing more, holding it all together. They don't always create the fulfillment we are promised. So what happens when the old metrics stop working? And what if wealth has more to do with freedom, energy, self-trust, and how fully you get to be yourself?
Susanne Ridolfi: A lot of the ideas in the world is what we do and people look at, know, this is what I do, right? And this is what I produce ⁓ in the world. But if you look at the word human being, it's about... We want to give life to others, right? That's one of the purposes on our planet as a woman, as we procreate together with men, we need to do that, but we're more of the nurturing features. So, you know, as mothers, we care for others. In my experience, women are very caring people. That's female quality, which is beautiful to have, but it's also... being and not doing. We're not human doings, we are human beings. So we allow ourselves to be who we are authentically being who we are.
Gry Stene: I am so excited to introduce Susanne Ridolfi, a health coach, speaker and author whose work bridges body, wisdom, self-care and the deeper rhythms of life. Susanne has spent much of her life working across fitness, integrated wellbeing, bodywork and coaching. And what we love about her perspective is that it feels both grounded and deeply intuitive.
Susanne Ridolfi: then you know that is the best and self-expressed unapologetically be who you are rather than the doing part yeah so going back to saying i'm a human being i am being myself i am allowing myself to be myself and we all are enough right and we all are deserving so just by being who you are should be enough and in my world is enough you know, it's the difference between mothering and then sometimes it goes overboard and you smother others. So you're doing too much. I am very much that person. I have one son, he's my one son and yes, still now he's 29 and sometimes you should not be doing what you're doing. You know you're smothering him, right? So we need to, and children comes to us in life for a reason and they stay with us for a season and then we have to let go of them.
Gry Stene: She speaks to a kind of wellbeing that isn't performative or trend driven, but rooted in simplicity, rhythm and learning to listen inward. And now in her seventh decade, she says she feels more vibrant and I can tell that she does, energetic and confident than ever, which makes her the perfect guest to help us begin the season.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah
Gry Stene: Wise words.
Steph Liyanage: That's, you know, it's, I know it sounds really simple, but for me, you know, the being and the acceptance of being rather doing sort of gives external validation, whereas being is that internal validation and differentiating between the two sometimes, if you're not listening, I feel can be, can be tricky. But,
Susanne Ridolfi: think a lot of the time, and we spoke about the midlife crisis, is about when we're in that stage in our life when our children leave our nest and they go forth and do other things. So then we become empty nesters, which... is one part of for many going into the midlife turning point if you like. So why do women, I think it's the nurturing that we have within us. That's what we are meant to be doing as women. it's about, we talked about boundary before, so how much do I actually do it? How much do I drop down? And I always go back to, most people in today's world have been in an aircraft, in an airplane and flying. So we sit there
Steph Liyanage: So Susananne, we dive in, ⁓ love to hear in your own words, who are you and what has shaped the way you think about health, wellbeing and what it means to live wealthy now. So what we like to ask our guests is if you unplugged, what does that mean or look like for you?
Susanne Ridolfi: Well, thank you. And first of all, thank you very much for having me as your guest today. I'm feeling honored and thank you for that wonderful introduction, Gry No pressure at all then. So, none whatsoever. How did I get into what I am doing? Well, I did a presentation a couple of days ago and I said, my passion for health and well-being has been there all my life, I believe. Well, the first thing I think about when I unplug is like leaving this world that we are in right now and unplug all my devices, the phones and everything and go back to Mother Nature because I do believe, well, we can't get away from it. It's in the air and everywhere. But the more we unplug from this, the better off we are as human beings. Yeah, so and unplug to the expectations that other people have.
Steph Liyanage: None whatsoever.
Gry Stene: Bye.
Steph Liyanage: Ugh.
Susanne Ridolfi: And they say every time they said when that mask drops down from the ceiling, where do you put it first? You put it on yourself, right? Because if you put it on self, if you look after self, and this is my mission or my work with women is...
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: I started off as gymnast, then became a gymnastic coach for young girls, which I thoroughly enjoyed. Decided to be a PE teacher, and this is back home in Sweden. And I enjoyed that for many, years. Then my life journey took me over to the States, and I spent two years in the middle of Manhattan in New York. If you look after self, then you're so much better off to be looking after others. So if you have the energy, if if you look after yourself, then you have more energy to give to others. And usually a much nicer person to be around as well, because if it affects your mind, then your emotional state. Does that answer your question, Gre? Yeah. It's like you said about validation. I have my daily things that I read on a daily basis. This is Lisa Messengers' mantra, to ignite your purpose. today she says, internal validation versus external validation. Yeah, there you go. The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them.
Gry Stene: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, and that resonates deep. Yeah. Yeah, and that resonates deeply with me. do work with parenting empowerment and ⁓ write about relationships with our children and looking after ourselves so we can be better carers. So that resonates very deeply. But I also acknowledge that that's been a conditioned kind of ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: in USA, being there as a personal trainer. Now you did mention I'm in my seventh decade. So when I spent time in New York, I was doing personal training, a la Jane Fonda style, with leg warmers, leotards and yeah. I had a very good time and I also was a dancer at that time. I was running around to all the dance studios and doing the best I could together with all the professionals.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. ⁓ look at you girls go.
Susanne Ridolfi: So when it comes to validation, validated from here rather than from here. Unplugged to, if I move forward with my passion and my purpose and just step up and be who I am, the person I'm supposed to be on this planet, well, that's the best I can do. Then I serve, then I'm here to serve.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Yeah.
Gry Stene: It would have rocked it.
Steph Liyanage: Love it! ⁓ environment where women, grew up in farming, so that women were very much the caretakers of the children. And it's almost as though the care has to be earned or justified. You know, like you're doing those things because I'm the woman, I'm the mother, I'm the carer. But what changes when self-care becomes less about or perceived as indulgence?
Susanne Ridolfi: dancers in the dance studio. But I also, I was an exercise freak, I decided to run a marathon when I was in New York as well, so that's me, a gymnast turning marathon runner. And I believe I was an exercise freak, I was addicted to exercise, and no exercise or no addiction is good for you, even if it is exercise. So I, my...
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, I love that.
Gry Stene: That's perfect. Listening to yourself. You know, I always hear myself and then I ignore it. That's kind of my thing. So I'm going to make an intention that I will actually listen to what my body is telling me and respect it. Not just acknowledge it, but respect it.
Susanne Ridolfi: That's right, yeah. I mean, I say to people, doesn't happen overnight. I'm still working on it. We all are working pro's in progress, right? So I give myself credit for how hard I'm working with certain things. you know, it's not, well, in my experience, it doesn't happen like that.
Steph Liyanage: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. but more about self-respect.
Susanne Ridolfi: body basically stopped me in my tracks. had created such bad back pain I couldn't move. And the only thing I wanted to do was of course to move. So I seeked treatments for that ended up having acupuncture by a lady who's trained in Japan and in Japan they train in hands on before they stick needles into people. So then I decided to retrain myself and I became a shiatsu therapist. Yeah, yeah, it's going back to those values in life. Who am I as a human being? Who am I as a woman on this planet? What do I stand for and what, you know, what can I create? What can I do on this planet? Yeah, very much self-respect. Totally agree with that.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Mmm. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: You you have your wake up calls sometimes and then you're okay one step at a time, you know, what can I do on a daily basis? And it's like, okay, rather than reacting, how about responding? Stop, we say to the kids and I work in the school, so you stop, listen and then take action.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: So, you know, many women say, I can take time for myself. I should be doing this instead. Take time out for yourself. And, you know, a lot of the times people think, ⁓ self-care is going to have a treatment of some kind or... So putting in their luxury things in life. And self-care is not about that. Self-care can take my time in the morning. I back to Sweden and started opening my clinic and presentations around that. I ended up in England for 13 years where I was running the British School of Shia Tzedaw together with my husband. We also trained to become what is called craniosacral therapist.
Gry Stene: Yep. Yep. Perfect.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: And I ask myself the three questions, does it serve? Does it serve me? Does it serve the situation and the people that I'm in? Does it serve the greater good of all? If I get a no to one of those questions, well, maybe I should take another action. Make another decision. So what I'm doing from that now living here in Australia since 2002 is to bring the skills I had from the fitness world together with the skills from the therapist world and I'm also a trained coach in listening and communication and I do what I would call holistic wellness coaching because I do believe that if you want to live truly well into the future
Gry Stene: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: You know, to sit down, quietness, have my cup of coffee, whatever it is you want to have. Have a space for myself, think about the day. Sending my gratitude and I know you do this stuff, you know, working on my gratitude for the day. So I actually spend a little bit of time with myself before I start the day. That doesn't have to be hours, you know. It could be some breath and breathing exercise to be part of that. Enough with five to ten minutes.
Steph Liyanage: I love that.
Gry Stene: Yeah, that is very good, I think. Now, Susanne, if people are listening and would love to learn more about you and your work, where can they find you? Thank
Susanne Ridolfi: there is a mixture of all these things. It's a myth that people say, I know what I need to do, I just need to exercise more and eat less and I'll be fine. But I think many people now have realized, well, that's not enough. We need all the pieces of the pie to make it happen. So ⁓ that's my background. Did that answer your question? or if I'm on Facebook and Instagram and LinkedIn and my website which is my name very easy susannerodolfi.com For some young mothers, it's chaos in their world before that. Before they can sleep well, but then they drop the kids to school. So sit in my car for five to 10 minutes and do that self-care. So it doesn't have to be going for a facial or going for a massage. That's lovely to do and it is self-care as well. But it's these small things that you put into your daily life that makes the biggest difference and can create that.
Gry Stene: Yeah. That's the way it's gotta be.
Steph Liyanage: And we'll put all of those in the show notes so people can connect with you and find you and... ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: And they can look for my book as well, your body and you.
Gry Stene: Yeah, I'm going to you a bit of a portfolio there.
Steph Liyanage: It absolutely. Yes, we'll put that in the show notes as well. Absolutely. Well, thank you so much, Suzanne. This has been such a beautiful way to begin our season, exploring what wealth looks like. And ⁓ I would like to say that your wisdom and knowledge is so deep and rich and just even having this conversation with you has been...
Susanne Ridolfi: That's me. What is wealth all about in today's world? Thanks to the things that happen in our world, think people have changed their mindset a little bit about looking at their health and wellbeing in a different way. So, you know, it's that saying, health is your greatest wealth.
Gry Stene: I must admit I feel a little bit addicted to my morning routine, but I also, ⁓ I may not do it every day, but, so I don't beat myself up over it if I don't do it, but I do it at least five times a week, right? So that's kind of my, my kindness to myself as well. But you do get a bit addicted to it because it's kind of, it centers you, right?
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, so what you put in and then I went to presentation a few weeks ago and she had another take on that which lies close to my heart because most people come to me they they don't have time and they don't have any energy. And she said, energy is your most precious currency.
Steph Liyanage: 100%. helping me reflect and reminding me to breathe and listen, which ⁓ I think are two vital ways that things that we can do that don't cost money and ⁓ can implement on a day-to-day basis. So thank you for reminding us of that and that wealth isn't only about what we built on the outside, it's also about how we feel within ourselves and how we care for our energy. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, it's interesting what people start to do and part of that is, you know, have your water, start your day with hydrating yourself. that's one of my clients. I forgot to drink my water this morning and the whole day didn't work. Okay, hang on. That's not the way this should work. All right.
Gry Stene: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: So the matter is how do we look after our energy and where do we put our energy into our life? People look at wealth or they look at abundance. What does abundance mean in today's life? Abundance for one people is totally different to abundance to another person. But part of that abundance is being able to live your life as you wish it to be.
Steph Liyanage: Mm, mm.
Gry Stene: ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: But it's a saying in my book that goes, how you start your day is how you live your day and that's how you live your life. So if you can create that little moment in the beginning of the day, if that's five minutes, where you settle and you create a little bit of peace, if that's through your breath and your breathing or your gratitude or combination, then in my experience, day, start your day that way, it becomes a better day.
Steph Liyanage: and whether the life we're actually living fits on now. think we're gonna wrap it up here and Gray, do you wanna anything in or Susananne, any last?
Susanne Ridolfi: So for some people that takes more of the financial wealth to be able to do that. And for other people doesn't take so much of the financial wealth. It's more the connections that you have. And, what I work in my work as well is what is your purpose in life? Because we all have the purpose. Well, that's my belief system. We all have a purpose on this planet. So if I can live my purpose, that's abundance. Yeah.
Gry Stene: No, I'm with you breathing, listening and then actually actioning what you're hearing. Asking good questions. Does it serve me? Does it serve the situation and does it serve the greater good? So that's my take-outs from today.
Steph Liyanage: You're right. Yeah. Mm. Yeah. 100%.
Susanne Ridolfi: you
Gry Stene: ⁓ You also talk about wisdom already being within the body. What does it really mean to listen in what, especially in a world that teaches women to override themselves?
Steph Liyanage: I love that. Yeah, yeah. So thank you so much, Suzanne. We've really appreciated you being here. ⁓ And to our audience, if this conversation has resonated with you, share it with someone who might need to hear it. And as always, stay curious, stay connected, and keep living unplugged. Thank you, Suzanne.
Susanne Ridolfi: You
Gry Stene: Yeah, I love that energy is your most valuable currency. I've got lots of energy, maybe not so much money, not as much money as I would like. But I have plenty of energy, that's for sure.
Steph Liyanage: Hmm. Mmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Well, that's me. I'm very down to earth people. I'm down to earth. you person and I believe that a lot of people in today's world have disconnected with Mother Earth and disconnected with Mother Nature. So one of the things I do believe is beneficial for all of us is to reconnect with Mother Nature and what she has to offer and Mother Nature comes for free. It comes back to your breath and your breathing if you like. know, all the people go for treatments and Yeah, but that's when you have to look at, know, where do I put my energy? Yeah, it's one of the things you put up as well, you know, why do women very often put themselves on the bottom of the list when it comes to ⁓ caring? You know, where do I put the energy? Thank you. Thank you so much. I'm honored. Thank you.
Gry Stene: Thank you. Exactly.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mmm.
Gry Stene: Yeah, it's very true. Now you've had a bunch of pivots in your life. seems, but was there like, I guess maybe you're back problems, but you answered the question. Did you have like a turning point that changed how you define a good life? One particular one? Or do you have many? Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: take supplements or whatever we do, which is great. those are... So how can say that? The wisdom is within your system. If you just allow yourself to listen, you know, the answer is within us. So to be able to hear the message from your body, you have to create a silent space. So listen and silence bells with the same letters, right? Well, that was probably my first turning point. Yes. So when I was then I said, ⁓ okay, so this is not working. I can't just, and I'm in my experience, a lot of people just push, push, push. You just keep going. So, and as I said the other day, awareness is the first step because I believe that a lot of people, most people are unaware of where they're at in their health journey.
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm. God.
Susanne Ridolfi: to truly hear what the message is from within. Yeah, it's interesting, right? So to truly hear if you can put yourself in that silent space, you know, it doesn't have to be meditation if that is walking on the beach or just sitting as we said quietly, you know, and having a cup of tea or coffee in the morning. And those people who just push, push, push, they don't have the time to stop and they don't stop and they don't listen. So if you just keep going, as I've written in my book, if you listen to your body's whispers, you don't have to hear it scream. If you listen to all those little signs and the symptoms that your body sends out, well, then you can work prevention, which I think is much better than cure. It's cheap, it doesn't take so much time, it's more enjoyable.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: you know, if you find that someone is basically listening to what your body is saying, you know, I said, I have, don't know how many conversations I have with myself. It's interesting, right? I have them in my body and actually tuning in and feeling, okay, if I'm hungry, what is it my body really needs? Rather than just rushing and taking something in the haste. ⁓ What can I give my body that actually acts like nourishment?
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: So that was my first pivot point. realized this is not going to work. had to do something different. Yeah. So that was my body screaming loudly. Other turning points is I had another turning point. We decided to celebrate my husband's birthday by trekking in Nepal. And that turning point there, we trekked quite high up in Nepal. We trekked to...
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mmm. Mm.
Gry Stene: I don't know.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: rather than just filling me up with something. So if you take the space and truly listen into it, will find it. Because our bodies are amazing, amazing. We have amazing equipment.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: above a base camp, so we were up on 5,700 meters above sea level. And what I came to realize that is the importance of your breath, know, something that we take for granted in our life. know, most people just breathe in and out and they don't think about your breath and your breathing. Well, when you're up there... When you are, as I said, if you're deep asleep, that's when a lot of stuff happens. That's when repair work happens. That's when you build up your energy system. That's when you build up your immune system. Even if you're going into the hospital and end up in an accident, very often they put you to sleep because they know, know, nervous system being up here is not going to help them. So if you put them to sleep, then the body can take over and do the work it needs to do. So in the end of the day,
Steph Liyanage: ⁓ wow.
Gry Stene: Hmm
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: You breathe very slowly and you can't move very fast. There was two things. I'm a fast mover, right? No, you have to take your pace and everybody else did the pace. It was slow motion. So, and that's one thing that I work with people on now. You how do we gain energy? Well, if you go back to your breath, you know, that's one way of actually gaining energy into your body. So another turning point. said,
Gry Stene: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: We go for treatments, we do all of that. That's tools that sort of kicks us in the right direction. But your best healer is you. The wisdom is in here. We already know.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. and you're singing to my heart. I feel like those words are like the words that ⁓ I love to hear. And I don't know that other people hear them enough. I used to be an emergency and ICU nurse. And so we used to do those things like definitely ⁓ morph medas, get everyone relaxed so that we can work with their bodies and get them back to a functioning state. So. ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: most people think about the exercise as doing this and going to the gym and going out running and walking, but actually gaining ⁓ from your breath and your breathing ⁓ through that also gaining energy. you you
Gry Stene: I would guess that's a bit of the sort of yogic sort of ways of working, isn't it, as well? I'm looking at Steph because I know she's well into that sort of thing. it's always about getting your breath to lead with your breath, I guess, in a way. But just to... And we've already touched on this, but Vitalify Unplugged, we talk about a lot more, wealth in a more deeper or broader sense than money.
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Prana. That's an extreme space, you know, it totally resonates in a different way of what you're saying. But wellness is a way, I believe that's something that you talk about and ⁓ and it leads us to becoming more yourself. And you say wellness is not a trend. What do you think most people often get wrong about wellness?
Gry Stene: you've already touched on a bunch of these things, but when you hear the word wealth, what does it actually mean to you if you can sort of succinctly define that? ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: What does wealth mean for me? Well, as I said, I use the word abundance more. It was interesting because somebody stopped me in the park the other day and he's obviously working with pension funds for people and said, how much do you think? How much money do you think a person needs to be able to to function on their pension? Well, that's a big question. You know, how many hours do we have? It totally depends on what you want to do. So wealth for me personally. I think a lot of people look for new things. They tried lots of things and things doesn't work. They don't feel the benefit of it if you'd like. So they're looking for the new things and when the trends come up. So take for example, ice bath here on the Gold Coast. Having ice baths is fantastic. It's all going to happen ice baths or intermittent fasting is another thing that works fantastic. You just have to do that and you know.
Steph Liyanage: No.
Susanne Ridolfi: is having started the longevity and I want to live a long and well life. I want to go when I'm ready to go, not because of something taking over me and deciding when I'm going. So that for me is wealth. If I can live my life well into the future until I decide this is the time I've done my work, I'm ready to go on and move on to the next step or whatever that is. Don't eat for 18 hours and then eat. Yeah, now it's time to keep walking. It solves the problem. So we're looking for the trends to try. I'm going to try that. And this is the new diet. I don't know how many diets is on the planet at the moment, but there many of them. And at the end of the day, that's not what's going to work. So we're all individuals. So if there was a diet that worked for everyone, I think we would have found it now, right? So if we are...
Gry Stene: Tai Chi walking.
Steph Liyanage: You
Susanne Ridolfi: My family, my connections are very important in my life. So that is wealth for me to be able to be with my family, to be able to support them in the way that they want. And with boundaries is very important as well to create my boundaries. Because I don't, it's the, I need my me time. That's wealth for me. And then I need my we time. So the more I can look after my me time, the better I am with the we time that I have. We're all unique in ourselves. So what works for me is not going to work for you, therefore it's not going to work for you, Gry when it comes to food and how I nourish myself. The movements that I do today is not going to work for, well, some of it might work, but we're going to have to find what works for us. And comes back to that listening and tuning into your body and knowing. As I said, some people said, well, try it. Honest and integrity, that's wealth for me. And moving forward with my purpose on this planet is wealth for me. If I can do that, then I'll be... Like I said, people speak about leaving a legacy. But if I can do my work on this planet, then that's wealth for me, being able to do that. You know, go and try it. If it works, works. And if it makes a difference, then continue. If something is working, why should you change it? Ice bath and intermittent fasting works brilliantly for men, but it also works so well for women. You know, I grew up with saunas myself. For us as women, the warmth is better. If you want to go for a cold one, then go for the 10 to 15, not the ice ones. Don't stay in there for 10 minutes.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Mm. Mm. Mm. there's so much to unpack there because your life sounds extremely rich and has this depth of experience that's so valuable that I'm it's just so good that you're here to share that ⁓ with listeners because you know there's so many things that are resonating I'm trying to filter which one to start with but I've got to keep generally to the script so ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: for men. And once again, I said for some women it works, right, because that's what they need. So if their body responds positively to it, well then go forth and do it. Okay.
Gry Stene: goes back to listening to your body doesn't it as well so and I guess the modern wellness world can get noises super quickly with all the trends and hacks and pressure and performance and things but what do you think are some simple foundations that actually support women to live well over time?
Susanne Ridolfi: Absolutely, yeah, yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm, I'll... yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: you
Steph Liyanage: Today we're exploring what happened. Otherwise we will go down rabbit holes.
Gry Stene: time.
Susanne Ridolfi: Steph, I had to stop you. Steph, I ran a networking event here for 10 years and I called them daring and disruptive women. So I had a plan, but it was very disruptive networking. I'll tell you. Did I stay to the script all the time? Well, yeah, sort of. It worked out. Coming back to looking at your values, yeah? And looking at your values and your life purpose. And then tuning in, well, it comes back to listening. You I'm a coach in listening and communication. The lady I worked with, ⁓ she actually doctorated on the subject and she based her doctorate on a scientific research that showed that if you are truly being heard, endorphins are being released in your system.
Steph Liyanage: Well, I just know my patterning and behaviour and it goes off script constantly and so I'm trying to reel myself in but I mean the things about breath and ⁓ your understanding of the value of connection and ⁓ just even living in lots of different countries and Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: Okay, so if we truly listen to our hearts desires, our needs, we release endorphins in my system, so we become our own healers. On the other hand, and it works when you speak to other people as well, if you're truly there 100%, not only with your ears, but from your heart, then you provide a healing space for that person. Now, if I don't listen, if I'm not being heard, then I start to build up toxins in my system.
Steph Liyanage: and witnessing different cultures and how people approach life, I'm sure that adds to the depth of your wisdom and knowledge. And the fact that you're engaging with a sort of Eastern philosophy as a Westerner is, you know, marrying these two really deep, deep thought processes that adds to wealth, in my view, which I fully value. thank you for just what you've shared already. ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: and
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: Okay, so what do I do to myself and what do we do as women if we don't hear our hearts decide if you don't allow yourself to being heard? We build up toxins in our own system. It's not very nice thing to do for ourselves, right? So the more we can tune into our inner voice, listen to our hearts desires and go with that, the more we can build up our own energy and the weller. Thank you.
Steph Liyanage: On Vitalify Unplugged, we're exploring what happens when women in particular begin redefining wealth in midlife. And some things that resonated with me that you've said already is like, we like to push through and being there, done that, you know, like keep going. it hurts. It's, there's lots of things trying to stop me, but I just keep going because that's what I thought I had to do. So, you know, and obviously that can have detrimental.
Susanne Ridolfi: we will be.
Gry Stene: Weller. I love that.
Steph Liyanage: kind of aspects on your health, on your wellbeing, on your connections. ⁓ But because that's kind of the old model of striving and proving and pushing, sort of you get to midlife and that no longer fits. And there's usually a deeper longing for something more honest, well, definitely in my world, more sustainable and much more aligned with.
Susanne Ridolfi: Well, that's a Swedish, Swinglish word. I just made it up.
Steph Liyanage: And you've said, obviously you're in your seventh decade and you ⁓ say that you're feeling more vibrant and confident than ever. And I think you've kind of pieced it all together, but in your words, what do you think has made that possible for you?
Susanne Ridolfi: Listening. You know, how we communicate with others and how we communicate with self. It's such an undervalued, undervalued tool, right? People go and you know, speaking, you know, speak. Well, the better listener you are, the better speaker you will become. So for me, it is listen to my body. That's what helped me through it.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. your truth and your own authenticity. So we're wondering if you could share a bit more about wealth beyond money, which I know money doesn't seem to be a top priority in your world anyway, but having it definitely has probably helped you do all these things and live in different countries and ⁓ giving you access to incredible experiences, partially. ⁓ Mmm. Yep.
Gry Stene: Mm.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. And what does it mean to build a life that actually fits where you are now or who you are now?
Gry Stene: Mmm. Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: you know, tuning in, really hearing, is it the right thing to do in my Pilates class this morning, or should I go for a walk on the beach? Is it the right thing to go out and push, push, push, or shall I take rest and stay with myself today? know, say I say yes to this, or do I say no to this? If I say yes, is that the best? You know, I'm going for a luncheon today and I'm really looking forward to it. I know, yeah, it's been great. And there's certain other things I say, no, I'm not good to that.
Gry Stene: I wonder if we can frame that in terms of what happens when kind of all definitions of success stop feeling satisfying through midlife kind of thing.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Nice, yes, much nicer way of saying that. Thank you.
Susanne Ridolfi: you
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Gry Stene: Well, we're talking about wind life, that's what I'm thinking.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: went back to this morning, in the business world, talk very much about success, right? And now I can't remember who said it. So listening for me has been the key and trust that the wisdom is within because if I truly listen, my body will speak back to me. My body will give me the answers and then my body will either feel not well or weller.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: but it's the expression that success is the progressive realization of a worthy idea, which works very well in the business world, right? So this is many, many years ago, it I can't remember. ⁓ that's what he said, success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal. ⁓
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Gry Stene: it.
Steph Liyanage: Hmm.
Gry Stene: Yeah. Well, that's.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, that's, I love it. And I think the only thing that keeps popping up in my mind is that I think, and we sort of mentioned it above, but women often override, like they hear it and they feel it, but they're like, shh, turn it down, I've gotta do, da, da, da, da, da, da, So I think.
Susanne Ridolfi: How does that land? It's the same with your health and your wellbeing, right? It's the progressive realization of worthy ideal. that's why. So what is your ideal then? So when women or anyone, I'm working with men as well, and they end up in that crisis moment as well for whatever reasons, but when we end up in that, you know, call it a turning point in our life.
Steph Liyanage: the skill that I, the phase that I'm in at the moment is learning to go, because I used to be quite intuitive and listen really carefully to my body. And then I had kids and got a husband and then, you know, life just got crazy. And I, you know, all the other stuff was louder than my internal. I'm in this season of re-tuning into listening. And I think I love that you're bringing that up as a wealth health,
Susanne Ridolfi: In my experience, the way to go is to really look at what are your values in life. You know, what are your true values and there are various ways of finding that one now. And that's what I do when I say that's the awareness coming back to the awareness first. I what are my true values in life? And do I are the actions and the activities that I take to work on myself in alignment with those values? So if they are in alignment with those values, what I found that then your life is more in flow.
Steph Liyanage: ⁓ core because I fully align with that. feel that's where I'm at and what I'm redeveloping within myself. So I really appreciate that.
Susanne Ridolfi: So the truth, thank you, the truth is we are human beings, right? And because we are human beings, sometimes we are in the human space of ourselves and that's nothing in the chat, you can't do this and you should be doing this, this is what you should be doing. And then we're going to the humans, that's when we truly listen, that's where we're here, then we listen to our core values and...
Steph Liyanage: Yes.
Gry Stene: Not true.
Susanne Ridolfi: You find your passion in life. Well, that might not be in the work that you're doing. So how do I then, if I look at my values in life, how do I then change my actions and how do I change what I do in life to be more in alignment with those values? So those values can lie very deep. And I also believe that values can change over time, depending on which stage you are in your life. know, the certain stage when I came into my seventies, what is, there's nothing right and wrong, what is the best options for me. But we're always going to be humans, so that chatter box is always going to come up and tell us, you know, nah, don't go, don't go. So. You know, people say, how do I stop that chatter? So if you acknowledge those voices that are within you and say, I hear you and I acknowledge you, having said that, I'm going to go back to this part. Yeah, this is my choice today. This is my choice. In this moment in time, this is my choice. And I will go with that. But we're all humans. That was an epiphany as well. That was a pivot. you now I need to look at how do I live my next 10 years? And that's the funny story is we used to have a dog, right? And someone said, why don't you get yourself a new puppy then? Because you look after everybody else's. I said, well, you know, a puppy can live for 10 to 15 years. Do I want to be charged of a puppy when I'm 95? Are we going to be human until we leave this planet? We're spiritual beings having a human experience. So, you know, we chose this. We always made a choice. So we chose this. Yeah.
Gry Stene: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: That.
Gry Stene: Thank
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: That's thing, thinking about getting a puppy when I'm 40. Well, yeah, that's the problem. So, you know, what do I see myself doing when I'm 75, when I'm 80 and beyond? It's very different mindset for me than to look at, what did I do in my 40s, 50s and 60s? So going back to the values and then from there work out, OK, so what is my purpose in life?
Gry Stene: It reminds me of my sort of experience with meditation and things because I couldn't meditate because I thought I had to block everything out, right? Until I kind of went, no, just let it pass through. It's wonderful. So, but I was Mm.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: You know many people come to me, I don't have a clue.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm, yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Just working with many, you ask me that question, I don't know what you mean. What do you mean by purpose? You know, I'm here, I'm doing my work, I'm doing that, I'm supporting my family. Well, is that within that, go back to your values and say, so what's my purpose on this planet? And I believe that when you find out your purpose and you can move forward with that and being in alignment with your values, then there is richness in your life.
Steph Liyanage: Yep.
Susanne Ridolfi: then you have the abundance and you have the wealth. Money for me is everything comes back to energy, right? So I work with energy, energy medicine and money is part of that. Yeah, if I want to be that, then I need more of that currency, you like. So how can I then from my passion and my purpose move closer to that? What is it that we really want to create? And how much of that money do I need to be able to do the things I want to do?
Gry Stene: .
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm. Yeah. And that creates a very different energy then, doesn't it? In terms of, you know, and like you've sort of alluded to where you direct that energy in terms of what you get back, what you put in, you put out. Is that what you are sort of suggesting with the energy type of exchange?
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, it's, you know, I like the expression energy audit. What are the actions and activities that I do that drains me, that depletes me of energy? Okay. And what are the actions and activities I do that lift me up? So if you really want to work on your energy level, okay, is it something I can do with those depletion, depleting energy activities? How can I reduce that?
Steph Liyanage: Okay, yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: I mean, sometimes that we all have been part of that. Well, speak for myself. I've certainly been part of it. I met certain people, they lift me up and I go away and I feel full of the energy of vibrancy. Whereas I go with somebody else, go, God, that was tiring. So you get your friends, or your connections, you who do I spend time with and how much time do I spend with that? You know, people say can't get away from her, you know, so keep going and going and going. So you have to have...
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: boundaries. So what kind of boundaries can I set? And I said, well, yes, I can be with you and I can spend half an hour, but then I really have to go. And another thing I think I'm very much, you know, did it a lot myself, you know, you can say no to things without, without having an explanation. know, no should be enough. No, I can't do that. I said, why? Well,
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Gry Stene: Hmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: I just can't do it. And so this is another way of looking at it. Whenever you say yes to something, what is it that you're saying no to? You say yes to something, I need to do that and I need to go and support her, I need to go and help them, whatever it is. And she's invited me to this event. I don't really feel like going, but I should.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Gry Stene: That's really... Hmm. Hmm. Pretty quite.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: If I say yes to that, what is the time saying no to you? And most of the time when you say no to you, it's something that is closer to your heart and just spending time with you.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. And ⁓ I think, sorry.
Gry Stene: Just for Jambon, I also think that we did an episode on boundaries in our previous season as well, so very much aligned with that. It's okay to say no, and what are you not saying?
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, absolutely.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. Yeah. But I also think midlife, well, for me, ⁓ I probably was saying yes, yes, yes, yes, and taking on everything until I hit that point where I couldn't do it anymore. And then it was ⁓ I knew it wasn't the right, it wasn't helping my energy. But at the same time, I hadn't yet learnt. ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: how to say no in a way without feeling guilty and I still work on that and I think maybe midlife like you know 40, 35, 40 onwards is kind of like a wake up. you sort of feel that way? you have that experience? You reckon it's later? Okay. Yeah.
Gry Stene: I'll to later.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, but it's such a, well, it's kind of just such a powerful season for redefinition. yeah, and what do you think the restlessness underneath that all is coming from?
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Well, usually when people go through a midlife crisis, if you want to call it that, you know, when they come to me, it's like my body is, I don't recognise myself anymore, my body is not functioning the way I want, it doesn't look the way I want, I do the right things, I think, but I don't get the results I want to have. So, you know, as I said to people, ageing comes with a lot of positive things, you know, wisdom, your life experience, and turning to wisdom if you want that.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Yep.
Susanne Ridolfi: But then physically, you know, we are aging. So our body is changing physiologically. And that's just part of the process. That's part of life. You know, for me now in my early 70s, I have to work harder to keep up my muscle strength than somebody in their 20s and 30s. The way I think about how I eat, if I want to live well into the future, is different to what I thought about it when I was younger.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mm. Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: And I think most of us, when we were young, we thought we were going to live forever. So we just kept going, going, going. So it is...
Steph Liyanage: I'm
Susanne Ridolfi: And everyone is an individual, so midlife crisis or later on in life, or midlife turning point, if you like. You know, for women, very often that comes when you end up in menopause, if that's perimenopause in the middle of menopause and then comes postmenopause and I say to him, well, that's me, I can be postmenopausal to the rest of my life, right? And the changes that comes with that, with the hormonal changes and everything. So...
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Mm, mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: Taking as I said, I'm going to say yes to everything, as you said, as well as a yes, yes, yes. But that's also, you do you really look at is this in alignment? If I say yes, is that in alignment with my true values in life? If it's not in alignment, my true values in life, why do I say yes?
Gry Stene: Mm.
Steph Liyanage: And that's a whole journey of its own. Why am I saying yes to this? Why?
Gry Stene: Bye.
Gry Stene: Suzanne, you speak so beautifully about self-care, not being selfish, but essential. Why do you think that so many women still struggle to give themselves what they need? Hey hey, it's your friend Gris, intuitive AI and tech whisperer, 60 plus, full throttle and torque energy bunny, chasing fun, fairness and freedom. If woman listening has spent years measuring her life by productivity, performance and how much she gives to everyone else.
Steph Liyanage: And I'm Steph, holistic nurse, soulful scribbler, magnetic mama, dancing through midlife with truth, magic and messy wild-hearted freedom. So today we're opening the season with a question that sounds simple, but can change everything once you sit with it. And that is, what does a wealthy life really mean now? Because many women in midlife, Huge question.
Susanne Ridolfi: Thank you. Thank you, that is a huge question. So we spoke about that earlier now. Sometimes I think it is how we are brought up ourselves, our own mothers, if you like. So how can say that? We are, and women are both, we are both human beings, right? But we're different species at the same time.
Gry Stene: What if wealth was about how fully she gets to be herself?
Susanne Ridolfi: Is that the question for me? That's big question.
Gry Stene: That is a question for you. Yeah, in two minutes or less.
Susanne Ridolfi: And I think women, in my experience, I can only speak from my own experience, women have more of the nurturing quality within us. That's what we do automatically.
Steph Liyanage: Hahaha! the old markers of success start to feel a little thin. Achievement, productivity, doing more, holding it all together. They don't always create the fulfillment we are promised. So what happens when the old metrics stop working? And what if wealth has more to do with freedom, energy, self-trust, and how fully you get to be yourself?
Susanne Ridolfi: A lot of the ideas in the world is what we do and people look at, know, this is what I do, right? And this is what I produce ⁓ in the world. But if you look at the word human being, it's about... We want to give life to others, right? That's one of the purposes on our planet as a woman, as we procreate together with men, we need to do that, but we're more of the nurturing features. So, you know, as mothers, we care for others. In my experience, women are very caring people. That's female quality, which is beautiful to have, but it's also... being and not doing. We're not human doings, we are human beings. So we allow ourselves to be who we are authentically being who we are.
Gry Stene: I am so excited to introduce Susanne Ridolfi, a health coach, speaker and author whose work bridges body, wisdom, self-care and the deeper rhythms of life. Susanne has spent much of her life working across fitness, integrated wellbeing, bodywork and coaching. And what we love about her perspective is that it feels both grounded and deeply intuitive.
Susanne Ridolfi: then you know that is the best and self-expressed unapologetically be who you are rather than the doing part yeah so going back to saying i'm a human being i am being myself i am allowing myself to be myself and we all are enough right and we all are deserving so just by being who you are should be enough and in my world is enough you know, it's the difference between mothering and then sometimes it goes overboard and you smother others. So you're doing too much. I am very much that person. I have one son, he's my one son and yes, still now he's 29 and sometimes you should not be doing what you're doing. You know you're smothering him, right? So we need to, and children comes to us in life for a reason and they stay with us for a season and then we have to let go of them.
Gry Stene: She speaks to a kind of wellbeing that isn't performative or trend driven, but rooted in simplicity, rhythm and learning to listen inward. And now in her seventh decade, she says she feels more vibrant and I can tell that she does, energetic and confident than ever, which makes her the perfect guest to help us begin the season.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah
Gry Stene: Wise words.
Steph Liyanage: That's, you know, it's, I know it sounds really simple, but for me, you know, the being and the acceptance of being rather doing sort of gives external validation, whereas being is that internal validation and differentiating between the two sometimes, if you're not listening, I feel can be, can be tricky. But,
Susanne Ridolfi: think a lot of the time, and we spoke about the midlife crisis, is about when we're in that stage in our life when our children leave our nest and they go forth and do other things. So then we become empty nesters, which... is one part of for many going into the midlife turning point if you like. So why do women, I think it's the nurturing that we have within us. That's what we are meant to be doing as women. it's about, we talked about boundary before, so how much do I actually do it? How much do I drop down? And I always go back to, most people in today's world have been in an aircraft, in an airplane and flying. So we sit there
Steph Liyanage: So Susananne, we dive in, ⁓ love to hear in your own words, who are you and what has shaped the way you think about health, wellbeing and what it means to live wealthy now. So what we like to ask our guests is if you unplugged, what does that mean or look like for you?
Susanne Ridolfi: Well, thank you. And first of all, thank you very much for having me as your guest today. I'm feeling honored and thank you for that wonderful introduction, Gry No pressure at all then. So, none whatsoever. How did I get into what I am doing? Well, I did a presentation a couple of days ago and I said, my passion for health and well-being has been there all my life, I believe. Well, the first thing I think about when I unplug is like leaving this world that we are in right now and unplug all my devices, the phones and everything and go back to Mother Nature because I do believe, well, we can't get away from it. It's in the air and everywhere. But the more we unplug from this, the better off we are as human beings. Yeah, so and unplug to the expectations that other people have.
Steph Liyanage: None whatsoever.
Gry Stene: Bye.
Steph Liyanage: Ugh.
Susanne Ridolfi: And they say every time they said when that mask drops down from the ceiling, where do you put it first? You put it on yourself, right? Because if you put it on self, if you look after self, and this is my mission or my work with women is...
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: I started off as gymnast, then became a gymnastic coach for young girls, which I thoroughly enjoyed. Decided to be a PE teacher, and this is back home in Sweden. And I enjoyed that for many, years. Then my life journey took me over to the States, and I spent two years in the middle of Manhattan in New York. If you look after self, then you're so much better off to be looking after others. So if you have the energy, if if you look after yourself, then you have more energy to give to others. And usually a much nicer person to be around as well, because if it affects your mind, then your emotional state. Does that answer your question, Gre? Yeah. It's like you said about validation. I have my daily things that I read on a daily basis. This is Lisa Messengers' mantra, to ignite your purpose. today she says, internal validation versus external validation. Yeah, there you go. The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them.
Gry Stene: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, and that resonates deep. Yeah. Yeah, and that resonates deeply with me. do work with parenting empowerment and ⁓ write about relationships with our children and looking after ourselves so we can be better carers. So that resonates very deeply. But I also acknowledge that that's been a conditioned kind of ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: in USA, being there as a personal trainer. Now you did mention I'm in my seventh decade. So when I spent time in New York, I was doing personal training, a la Jane Fonda style, with leg warmers, leotards and yeah. I had a very good time and I also was a dancer at that time. I was running around to all the dance studios and doing the best I could together with all the professionals.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. ⁓ look at you girls go.
Susanne Ridolfi: So when it comes to validation, validated from here rather than from here. Unplugged to, if I move forward with my passion and my purpose and just step up and be who I am, the person I'm supposed to be on this planet, well, that's the best I can do. Then I serve, then I'm here to serve.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Yeah.
Gry Stene: It would have rocked it.
Steph Liyanage: Love it! ⁓ environment where women, grew up in farming, so that women were very much the caretakers of the children. And it's almost as though the care has to be earned or justified. You know, like you're doing those things because I'm the woman, I'm the mother, I'm the carer. But what changes when self-care becomes less about or perceived as indulgence?
Susanne Ridolfi: dancers in the dance studio. But I also, I was an exercise freak, I decided to run a marathon when I was in New York as well, so that's me, a gymnast turning marathon runner. And I believe I was an exercise freak, I was addicted to exercise, and no exercise or no addiction is good for you, even if it is exercise. So I, my...
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, I love that.
Gry Stene: That's perfect. Listening to yourself. You know, I always hear myself and then I ignore it. That's kind of my thing. So I'm going to make an intention that I will actually listen to what my body is telling me and respect it. Not just acknowledge it, but respect it.
Susanne Ridolfi: That's right, yeah. I mean, I say to people, doesn't happen overnight. I'm still working on it. We all are working pro's in progress, right? So I give myself credit for how hard I'm working with certain things. you know, it's not, well, in my experience, it doesn't happen like that.
Steph Liyanage: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. but more about self-respect.
Susanne Ridolfi: body basically stopped me in my tracks. had created such bad back pain I couldn't move. And the only thing I wanted to do was of course to move. So I seeked treatments for that ended up having acupuncture by a lady who's trained in Japan and in Japan they train in hands on before they stick needles into people. So then I decided to retrain myself and I became a shiatsu therapist. Yeah, yeah, it's going back to those values in life. Who am I as a human being? Who am I as a woman on this planet? What do I stand for and what, you know, what can I create? What can I do on this planet? Yeah, very much self-respect. Totally agree with that.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Mmm. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: You you have your wake up calls sometimes and then you're okay one step at a time, you know, what can I do on a daily basis? And it's like, okay, rather than reacting, how about responding? Stop, we say to the kids and I work in the school, so you stop, listen and then take action.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: So, you know, many women say, I can take time for myself. I should be doing this instead. Take time out for yourself. And, you know, a lot of the times people think, ⁓ self-care is going to have a treatment of some kind or... So putting in their luxury things in life. And self-care is not about that. Self-care can take my time in the morning. I back to Sweden and started opening my clinic and presentations around that. I ended up in England for 13 years where I was running the British School of Shia Tzedaw together with my husband. We also trained to become what is called craniosacral therapist.
Gry Stene: Yep. Yep. Perfect.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: And I ask myself the three questions, does it serve? Does it serve me? Does it serve the situation and the people that I'm in? Does it serve the greater good of all? If I get a no to one of those questions, well, maybe I should take another action. Make another decision. So what I'm doing from that now living here in Australia since 2002 is to bring the skills I had from the fitness world together with the skills from the therapist world and I'm also a trained coach in listening and communication and I do what I would call holistic wellness coaching because I do believe that if you want to live truly well into the future
Gry Stene: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: You know, to sit down, quietness, have my cup of coffee, whatever it is you want to have. Have a space for myself, think about the day. Sending my gratitude and I know you do this stuff, you know, working on my gratitude for the day. So I actually spend a little bit of time with myself before I start the day. That doesn't have to be hours, you know. It could be some breath and breathing exercise to be part of that. Enough with five to ten minutes.
Steph Liyanage: I love that.
Gry Stene: Yeah, that is very good, I think. Now, Susanne, if people are listening and would love to learn more about you and your work, where can they find you? Thank
Susanne Ridolfi: there is a mixture of all these things. It's a myth that people say, I know what I need to do, I just need to exercise more and eat less and I'll be fine. But I think many people now have realized, well, that's not enough. We need all the pieces of the pie to make it happen. So ⁓ that's my background. Did that answer your question? or if I'm on Facebook and Instagram and LinkedIn and my website which is my name very easy susannerodolfi.com For some young mothers, it's chaos in their world before that. Before they can sleep well, but then they drop the kids to school. So sit in my car for five to 10 minutes and do that self-care. So it doesn't have to be going for a facial or going for a massage. That's lovely to do and it is self-care as well. But it's these small things that you put into your daily life that makes the biggest difference and can create that.
Gry Stene: Yeah. That's the way it's gotta be.
Steph Liyanage: And we'll put all of those in the show notes so people can connect with you and find you and... ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: And they can look for my book as well, your body and you.
Gry Stene: Yeah, I'm going to you a bit of a portfolio there.
Steph Liyanage: It absolutely. Yes, we'll put that in the show notes as well. Absolutely. Well, thank you so much, Suzanne. This has been such a beautiful way to begin our season, exploring what wealth looks like. And ⁓ I would like to say that your wisdom and knowledge is so deep and rich and just even having this conversation with you has been...
Susanne Ridolfi: That's me. What is wealth all about in today's world? Thanks to the things that happen in our world, think people have changed their mindset a little bit about looking at their health and wellbeing in a different way. So, you know, it's that saying, health is your greatest wealth.
Gry Stene: I must admit I feel a little bit addicted to my morning routine, but I also, ⁓ I may not do it every day, but, so I don't beat myself up over it if I don't do it, but I do it at least five times a week, right? So that's kind of my, my kindness to myself as well. But you do get a bit addicted to it because it's kind of, it centers you, right?
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, so what you put in and then I went to presentation a few weeks ago and she had another take on that which lies close to my heart because most people come to me they they don't have time and they don't have any energy. And she said, energy is your most precious currency.
Steph Liyanage: 100%. helping me reflect and reminding me to breathe and listen, which ⁓ I think are two vital ways that things that we can do that don't cost money and ⁓ can implement on a day-to-day basis. So thank you for reminding us of that and that wealth isn't only about what we built on the outside, it's also about how we feel within ourselves and how we care for our energy. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, it's interesting what people start to do and part of that is, you know, have your water, start your day with hydrating yourself. that's one of my clients. I forgot to drink my water this morning and the whole day didn't work. Okay, hang on. That's not the way this should work. All right.
Gry Stene: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: So the matter is how do we look after our energy and where do we put our energy into our life? People look at wealth or they look at abundance. What does abundance mean in today's life? Abundance for one people is totally different to abundance to another person. But part of that abundance is being able to live your life as you wish it to be.
Steph Liyanage: Mm, mm.
Gry Stene: ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: But it's a saying in my book that goes, how you start your day is how you live your day and that's how you live your life. So if you can create that little moment in the beginning of the day, if that's five minutes, where you settle and you create a little bit of peace, if that's through your breath and your breathing or your gratitude or combination, then in my experience, day, start your day that way, it becomes a better day.
Steph Liyanage: and whether the life we're actually living fits on now. think we're gonna wrap it up here and Gray, do you wanna anything in or Susananne, any last?
Susanne Ridolfi: So for some people that takes more of the financial wealth to be able to do that. And for other people doesn't take so much of the financial wealth. It's more the connections that you have. And, what I work in my work as well is what is your purpose in life? Because we all have the purpose. Well, that's my belief system. We all have a purpose on this planet. So if I can live my purpose, that's abundance. Yeah.
Gry Stene: No, I'm with you breathing, listening and then actually actioning what you're hearing. Asking good questions. Does it serve me? Does it serve the situation and does it serve the greater good? So that's my take-outs from today.
Steph Liyanage: You're right. Yeah. Mm. Yeah. 100%.
Susanne Ridolfi: you
Gry Stene: ⁓ You also talk about wisdom already being within the body. What does it really mean to listen in what, especially in a world that teaches women to override themselves?
Steph Liyanage: I love that. Yeah, yeah. So thank you so much, Suzanne. We've really appreciated you being here. ⁓ And to our audience, if this conversation has resonated with you, share it with someone who might need to hear it. And as always, stay curious, stay connected, and keep living unplugged. Thank you, Suzanne.
Susanne Ridolfi: You
Gry Stene: Yeah, I love that energy is your most valuable currency. I've got lots of energy, maybe not so much money, not as much money as I would like. But I have plenty of energy, that's for sure.
Steph Liyanage: Hmm. Mmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Well, that's me. I'm very down to earth people. I'm down to earth. you person and I believe that a lot of people in today's world have disconnected with Mother Earth and disconnected with Mother Nature. So one of the things I do believe is beneficial for all of us is to reconnect with Mother Nature and what she has to offer and Mother Nature comes for free. It comes back to your breath and your breathing if you like. know, all the people go for treatments and Yeah, but that's when you have to look at, know, where do I put my energy? Yeah, it's one of the things you put up as well, you know, why do women very often put themselves on the bottom of the list when it comes to ⁓ caring? You know, where do I put the energy? Thank you. Thank you so much. I'm honored. Thank you.
Gry Stene: Thank you. Exactly.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mmm.
Gry Stene: Yeah, it's very true. Now you've had a bunch of pivots in your life. seems, but was there like, I guess maybe you're back problems, but you answered the question. Did you have like a turning point that changed how you define a good life? One particular one? Or do you have many? Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: take supplements or whatever we do, which is great. those are... So how can say that? The wisdom is within your system. If you just allow yourself to listen, you know, the answer is within us. So to be able to hear the message from your body, you have to create a silent space. So listen and silence bells with the same letters, right? Well, that was probably my first turning point. Yes. So when I was then I said, ⁓ okay, so this is not working. I can't just, and I'm in my experience, a lot of people just push, push, push. You just keep going. So, and as I said the other day, awareness is the first step because I believe that a lot of people, most people are unaware of where they're at in their health journey.
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm. God.
Susanne Ridolfi: to truly hear what the message is from within. Yeah, it's interesting, right? So to truly hear if you can put yourself in that silent space, you know, it doesn't have to be meditation if that is walking on the beach or just sitting as we said quietly, you know, and having a cup of tea or coffee in the morning. And those people who just push, push, push, they don't have the time to stop and they don't stop and they don't listen. So if you just keep going, as I've written in my book, if you listen to your body's whispers, you don't have to hear it scream. If you listen to all those little signs and the symptoms that your body sends out, well, then you can work prevention, which I think is much better than cure. It's cheap, it doesn't take so much time, it's more enjoyable.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: you know, if you find that someone is basically listening to what your body is saying, you know, I said, I have, don't know how many conversations I have with myself. It's interesting, right? I have them in my body and actually tuning in and feeling, okay, if I'm hungry, what is it my body really needs? Rather than just rushing and taking something in the haste. ⁓ What can I give my body that actually acts like nourishment?
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: So that was my first pivot point. realized this is not going to work. had to do something different. Yeah. So that was my body screaming loudly. Other turning points is I had another turning point. We decided to celebrate my husband's birthday by trekking in Nepal. And that turning point there, we trekked quite high up in Nepal. We trekked to...
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mmm. Mm.
Gry Stene: I don't know.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: rather than just filling me up with something. So if you take the space and truly listen into it, will find it. Because our bodies are amazing, amazing. We have amazing equipment.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: above a base camp, so we were up on 5,700 meters above sea level. And what I came to realize that is the importance of your breath, know, something that we take for granted in our life. know, most people just breathe in and out and they don't think about your breath and your breathing. Well, when you're up there... When you are, as I said, if you're deep asleep, that's when a lot of stuff happens. That's when repair work happens. That's when you build up your energy system. That's when you build up your immune system. Even if you're going into the hospital and end up in an accident, very often they put you to sleep because they know, know, nervous system being up here is not going to help them. So if you put them to sleep, then the body can take over and do the work it needs to do. So in the end of the day,
Steph Liyanage: ⁓ wow.
Gry Stene: Hmm
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: You breathe very slowly and you can't move very fast. There was two things. I'm a fast mover, right? No, you have to take your pace and everybody else did the pace. It was slow motion. So, and that's one thing that I work with people on now. You how do we gain energy? Well, if you go back to your breath, you know, that's one way of actually gaining energy into your body. So another turning point. said,
Gry Stene: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: We go for treatments, we do all of that. That's tools that sort of kicks us in the right direction. But your best healer is you. The wisdom is in here. We already know.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. and you're singing to my heart. I feel like those words are like the words that ⁓ I love to hear. And I don't know that other people hear them enough. I used to be an emergency and ICU nurse. And so we used to do those things like definitely ⁓ morph medas, get everyone relaxed so that we can work with their bodies and get them back to a functioning state. So. ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: most people think about the exercise as doing this and going to the gym and going out running and walking, but actually gaining ⁓ from your breath and your breathing ⁓ through that also gaining energy. you you
Gry Stene: I would guess that's a bit of the sort of yogic sort of ways of working, isn't it, as well? I'm looking at Steph because I know she's well into that sort of thing. it's always about getting your breath to lead with your breath, I guess, in a way. But just to... And we've already touched on this, but Vitalify Unplugged, we talk about a lot more, wealth in a more deeper or broader sense than money.
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Prana. That's an extreme space, you know, it totally resonates in a different way of what you're saying. But wellness is a way, I believe that's something that you talk about and ⁓ and it leads us to becoming more yourself. And you say wellness is not a trend. What do you think most people often get wrong about wellness?
Gry Stene: you've already touched on a bunch of these things, but when you hear the word wealth, what does it actually mean to you if you can sort of succinctly define that? ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: What does wealth mean for me? Well, as I said, I use the word abundance more. It was interesting because somebody stopped me in the park the other day and he's obviously working with pension funds for people and said, how much do you think? How much money do you think a person needs to be able to to function on their pension? Well, that's a big question. You know, how many hours do we have? It totally depends on what you want to do. So wealth for me personally. I think a lot of people look for new things. They tried lots of things and things doesn't work. They don't feel the benefit of it if you'd like. So they're looking for the new things and when the trends come up. So take for example, ice bath here on the Gold Coast. Having ice baths is fantastic. It's all going to happen ice baths or intermittent fasting is another thing that works fantastic. You just have to do that and you know.
Steph Liyanage: No.
Susanne Ridolfi: is having started the longevity and I want to live a long and well life. I want to go when I'm ready to go, not because of something taking over me and deciding when I'm going. So that for me is wealth. If I can live my life well into the future until I decide this is the time I've done my work, I'm ready to go on and move on to the next step or whatever that is. Don't eat for 18 hours and then eat. Yeah, now it's time to keep walking. It solves the problem. So we're looking for the trends to try. I'm going to try that. And this is the new diet. I don't know how many diets is on the planet at the moment, but there many of them. And at the end of the day, that's not what's going to work. So we're all individuals. So if there was a diet that worked for everyone, I think we would have found it now, right? So if we are...
Gry Stene: Tai Chi walking.
Steph Liyanage: You
Susanne Ridolfi: My family, my connections are very important in my life. So that is wealth for me to be able to be with my family, to be able to support them in the way that they want. And with boundaries is very important as well to create my boundaries. Because I don't, it's the, I need my me time. That's wealth for me. And then I need my we time. So the more I can look after my me time, the better I am with the we time that I have. We're all unique in ourselves. So what works for me is not going to work for you, therefore it's not going to work for you, Gry when it comes to food and how I nourish myself. The movements that I do today is not going to work for, well, some of it might work, but we're going to have to find what works for us. And comes back to that listening and tuning into your body and knowing. As I said, some people said, well, try it. Honest and integrity, that's wealth for me. And moving forward with my purpose on this planet is wealth for me. If I can do that, then I'll be... Like I said, people speak about leaving a legacy. But if I can do my work on this planet, then that's wealth for me, being able to do that. You know, go and try it. If it works, works. And if it makes a difference, then continue. If something is working, why should you change it? Ice bath and intermittent fasting works brilliantly for men, but it also works so well for women. You know, I grew up with saunas myself. For us as women, the warmth is better. If you want to go for a cold one, then go for the 10 to 15, not the ice ones. Don't stay in there for 10 minutes.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Mm. Mm. Mm. there's so much to unpack there because your life sounds extremely rich and has this depth of experience that's so valuable that I'm it's just so good that you're here to share that ⁓ with listeners because you know there's so many things that are resonating I'm trying to filter which one to start with but I've got to keep generally to the script so ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: for men. And once again, I said for some women it works, right, because that's what they need. So if their body responds positively to it, well then go forth and do it. Okay.
Gry Stene: goes back to listening to your body doesn't it as well so and I guess the modern wellness world can get noises super quickly with all the trends and hacks and pressure and performance and things but what do you think are some simple foundations that actually support women to live well over time?
Susanne Ridolfi: Absolutely, yeah, yeah.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm, I'll... yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: you
Steph Liyanage: Today we're exploring what happened. Otherwise we will go down rabbit holes.
Gry Stene: time.
Susanne Ridolfi: Steph, I had to stop you. Steph, I ran a networking event here for 10 years and I called them daring and disruptive women. So I had a plan, but it was very disruptive networking. I'll tell you. Did I stay to the script all the time? Well, yeah, sort of. It worked out. Coming back to looking at your values, yeah? And looking at your values and your life purpose. And then tuning in, well, it comes back to listening. You I'm a coach in listening and communication. The lady I worked with, ⁓ she actually doctorated on the subject and she based her doctorate on a scientific research that showed that if you are truly being heard, endorphins are being released in your system.
Steph Liyanage: Well, I just know my patterning and behaviour and it goes off script constantly and so I'm trying to reel myself in but I mean the things about breath and ⁓ your understanding of the value of connection and ⁓ just even living in lots of different countries and Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: Okay, so if we truly listen to our hearts desires, our needs, we release endorphins in my system, so we become our own healers. On the other hand, and it works when you speak to other people as well, if you're truly there 100%, not only with your ears, but from your heart, then you provide a healing space for that person. Now, if I don't listen, if I'm not being heard, then I start to build up toxins in my system.
Steph Liyanage: and witnessing different cultures and how people approach life, I'm sure that adds to the depth of your wisdom and knowledge. And the fact that you're engaging with a sort of Eastern philosophy as a Westerner is, you know, marrying these two really deep, deep thought processes that adds to wealth, in my view, which I fully value. thank you for just what you've shared already. ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: and
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: Okay, so what do I do to myself and what do we do as women if we don't hear our hearts decide if you don't allow yourself to being heard? We build up toxins in our own system. It's not very nice thing to do for ourselves, right? So the more we can tune into our inner voice, listen to our hearts desires and go with that, the more we can build up our own energy and the weller. Thank you.
Steph Liyanage: On Vitalify Unplugged, we're exploring what happens when women in particular begin redefining wealth in midlife. And some things that resonated with me that you've said already is like, we like to push through and being there, done that, you know, like keep going. it hurts. It's, there's lots of things trying to stop me, but I just keep going because that's what I thought I had to do. So, you know, and obviously that can have detrimental.
Susanne Ridolfi: we will be.
Gry Stene: Weller. I love that.
Steph Liyanage: kind of aspects on your health, on your wellbeing, on your connections. ⁓ But because that's kind of the old model of striving and proving and pushing, sort of you get to midlife and that no longer fits. And there's usually a deeper longing for something more honest, well, definitely in my world, more sustainable and much more aligned with.
Susanne Ridolfi: Well, that's a Swedish, Swinglish word. I just made it up.
Steph Liyanage: And you've said, obviously you're in your seventh decade and you ⁓ say that you're feeling more vibrant and confident than ever. And I think you've kind of pieced it all together, but in your words, what do you think has made that possible for you?
Susanne Ridolfi: Listening. You know, how we communicate with others and how we communicate with self. It's such an undervalued, undervalued tool, right? People go and you know, speaking, you know, speak. Well, the better listener you are, the better speaker you will become. So for me, it is listen to my body. That's what helped me through it.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. your truth and your own authenticity. So we're wondering if you could share a bit more about wealth beyond money, which I know money doesn't seem to be a top priority in your world anyway, but having it definitely has probably helped you do all these things and live in different countries and ⁓ giving you access to incredible experiences, partially. ⁓ Mmm. Yep.
Gry Stene: Mm.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. And what does it mean to build a life that actually fits where you are now or who you are now?
Gry Stene: Mmm. Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: you know, tuning in, really hearing, is it the right thing to do in my Pilates class this morning, or should I go for a walk on the beach? Is it the right thing to go out and push, push, push, or shall I take rest and stay with myself today? know, say I say yes to this, or do I say no to this? If I say yes, is that the best? You know, I'm going for a luncheon today and I'm really looking forward to it. I know, yeah, it's been great. And there's certain other things I say, no, I'm not good to that.
Gry Stene: I wonder if we can frame that in terms of what happens when kind of all definitions of success stop feeling satisfying through midlife kind of thing.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Nice, yes, much nicer way of saying that. Thank you.
Susanne Ridolfi: you
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Gry Stene: Well, we're talking about wind life, that's what I'm thinking.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: went back to this morning, in the business world, talk very much about success, right? And now I can't remember who said it. So listening for me has been the key and trust that the wisdom is within because if I truly listen, my body will speak back to me. My body will give me the answers and then my body will either feel not well or weller.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: but it's the expression that success is the progressive realization of a worthy idea, which works very well in the business world, right? So this is many, many years ago, it I can't remember. ⁓ that's what he said, success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal. ⁓
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Gry Stene: it.
Steph Liyanage: Hmm.
Gry Stene: Yeah. Well, that's.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, that's, I love it. And I think the only thing that keeps popping up in my mind is that I think, and we sort of mentioned it above, but women often override, like they hear it and they feel it, but they're like, shh, turn it down, I've gotta do, da, da, da, da, da, da, So I think.
Susanne Ridolfi: How does that land? It's the same with your health and your wellbeing, right? It's the progressive realization of worthy ideal. that's why. So what is your ideal then? So when women or anyone, I'm working with men as well, and they end up in that crisis moment as well for whatever reasons, but when we end up in that, you know, call it a turning point in our life.
Steph Liyanage: the skill that I, the phase that I'm in at the moment is learning to go, because I used to be quite intuitive and listen really carefully to my body. And then I had kids and got a husband and then, you know, life just got crazy. And I, you know, all the other stuff was louder than my internal. I'm in this season of re-tuning into listening. And I think I love that you're bringing that up as a wealth health,
Susanne Ridolfi: In my experience, the way to go is to really look at what are your values in life. You know, what are your true values and there are various ways of finding that one now. And that's what I do when I say that's the awareness coming back to the awareness first. I what are my true values in life? And do I are the actions and the activities that I take to work on myself in alignment with those values? So if they are in alignment with those values, what I found that then your life is more in flow.
Steph Liyanage: ⁓ core because I fully align with that. feel that's where I'm at and what I'm redeveloping within myself. So I really appreciate that.
Susanne Ridolfi: So the truth, thank you, the truth is we are human beings, right? And because we are human beings, sometimes we are in the human space of ourselves and that's nothing in the chat, you can't do this and you should be doing this, this is what you should be doing. And then we're going to the humans, that's when we truly listen, that's where we're here, then we listen to our core values and...
Steph Liyanage: Yes.
Gry Stene: Not true.
Susanne Ridolfi: You find your passion in life. Well, that might not be in the work that you're doing. So how do I then, if I look at my values in life, how do I then change my actions and how do I change what I do in life to be more in alignment with those values? So those values can lie very deep. And I also believe that values can change over time, depending on which stage you are in your life. know, the certain stage when I came into my seventies, what is, there's nothing right and wrong, what is the best options for me. But we're always going to be humans, so that chatter box is always going to come up and tell us, you know, nah, don't go, don't go. So. You know, people say, how do I stop that chatter? So if you acknowledge those voices that are within you and say, I hear you and I acknowledge you, having said that, I'm going to go back to this part. Yeah, this is my choice today. This is my choice. In this moment in time, this is my choice. And I will go with that. But we're all humans. That was an epiphany as well. That was a pivot. you now I need to look at how do I live my next 10 years? And that's the funny story is we used to have a dog, right? And someone said, why don't you get yourself a new puppy then? Because you look after everybody else's. I said, well, you know, a puppy can live for 10 to 15 years. Do I want to be charged of a puppy when I'm 95? Are we going to be human until we leave this planet? We're spiritual beings having a human experience. So, you know, we chose this. We always made a choice. So we chose this. Yeah.
Gry Stene: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: That.
Gry Stene: Thank
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: That's thing, thinking about getting a puppy when I'm 40. Well, yeah, that's the problem. So, you know, what do I see myself doing when I'm 75, when I'm 80 and beyond? It's very different mindset for me than to look at, what did I do in my 40s, 50s and 60s? So going back to the values and then from there work out, OK, so what is my purpose in life?
Gry Stene: It reminds me of my sort of experience with meditation and things because I couldn't meditate because I thought I had to block everything out, right? Until I kind of went, no, just let it pass through. It's wonderful. So, but I was Mm.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: You know many people come to me, I don't have a clue.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm, yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Just working with many, you ask me that question, I don't know what you mean. What do you mean by purpose? You know, I'm here, I'm doing my work, I'm doing that, I'm supporting my family. Well, is that within that, go back to your values and say, so what's my purpose on this planet? And I believe that when you find out your purpose and you can move forward with that and being in alignment with your values, then there is richness in your life.
Steph Liyanage: Yep.
Susanne Ridolfi: then you have the abundance and you have the wealth. Money for me is everything comes back to energy, right? So I work with energy, energy medicine and money is part of that. Yeah, if I want to be that, then I need more of that currency, you like. So how can I then from my passion and my purpose move closer to that? What is it that we really want to create? And how much of that money do I need to be able to do the things I want to do?
Gry Stene: .
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm. Yeah. And that creates a very different energy then, doesn't it? In terms of, you know, and like you've sort of alluded to where you direct that energy in terms of what you get back, what you put in, you put out. Is that what you are sort of suggesting with the energy type of exchange?
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, it's, you know, I like the expression energy audit. What are the actions and activities that I do that drains me, that depletes me of energy? Okay. And what are the actions and activities I do that lift me up? So if you really want to work on your energy level, okay, is it something I can do with those depletion, depleting energy activities? How can I reduce that?
Steph Liyanage: Okay, yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: I mean, sometimes that we all have been part of that. Well, speak for myself. I've certainly been part of it. I met certain people, they lift me up and I go away and I feel full of the energy of vibrancy. Whereas I go with somebody else, go, God, that was tiring. So you get your friends, or your connections, you who do I spend time with and how much time do I spend with that? You know, people say can't get away from her, you know, so keep going and going and going. So you have to have...
Steph Liyanage: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: boundaries. So what kind of boundaries can I set? And I said, well, yes, I can be with you and I can spend half an hour, but then I really have to go. And another thing I think I'm very much, you know, did it a lot myself, you know, you can say no to things without, without having an explanation. know, no should be enough. No, I can't do that. I said, why? Well,
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Gry Stene: Hmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: I just can't do it. And so this is another way of looking at it. Whenever you say yes to something, what is it that you're saying no to? You say yes to something, I need to do that and I need to go and support her, I need to go and help them, whatever it is. And she's invited me to this event. I don't really feel like going, but I should.
Steph Liyanage: Mm.
Gry Stene: That's really... Hmm. Hmm. Pretty quite.
Steph Liyanage: Mmm.
Susanne Ridolfi: If I say yes to that, what is the time saying no to you? And most of the time when you say no to you, it's something that is closer to your heart and just spending time with you.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. And ⁓ I think, sorry.
Gry Stene: Just for Jambon, I also think that we did an episode on boundaries in our previous season as well, so very much aligned with that. It's okay to say no, and what are you not saying?
Steph Liyanage: Yeah.
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, absolutely.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah. Yeah. But I also think midlife, well, for me, ⁓ I probably was saying yes, yes, yes, yes, and taking on everything until I hit that point where I couldn't do it anymore. And then it was ⁓ I knew it wasn't the right, it wasn't helping my energy. But at the same time, I hadn't yet learnt. ⁓
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah.
Steph Liyanage: how to say no in a way without feeling guilty and I still work on that and I think maybe midlife like you know 40, 35, 40 onwards is kind of like a wake up. you sort of feel that way? you have that experience? You reckon it's later? Okay. Yeah.
Gry Stene: I'll to later.
Steph Liyanage: Yeah, but it's such a, well, it's kind of just such a powerful season for redefinition. yeah, and what do you think the restlessness underneath that all is coming from?
Susanne Ridolfi: Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Well, usually when people go through a midlife crisis, if you want to call it that, you know, when they come to me, it's like my body is, I don't recognise myself anymore, my body is not functioning the way I want, it doesn't look the way I want, I do the right things, I think, but I don't get the results I want to have. So, you know, as I said to people, ageing comes with a lot of positive things, you know, wisdom, your life experience, and turning to wisdom if you want that.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Yep.
Susanne Ridolfi: But then physically, you know, we are aging. So our body is changing physiologically. And that's just part of the process. That's part of life. You know, for me now in my early 70s, I have to work harder to keep up my muscle strength than somebody in their 20s and 30s. The way I think about how I eat, if I want to live well into the future, is different to what I thought about it when I was younger.
Steph Liyanage: Mm. Mm. Mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: And I think most of us, when we were young, we thought we were going to live forever. So we just kept going, going, going. So it is...
Steph Liyanage: I'm
Susanne Ridolfi: And everyone is an individual, so midlife crisis or later on in life, or midlife turning point, if you like. You know, for women, very often that comes when you end up in menopause, if that's perimenopause in the middle of menopause and then comes postmenopause and I say to him, well, that's me, I can be postmenopausal to the rest of my life, right? And the changes that comes with that, with the hormonal changes and everything. So...
Steph Liyanage: Mmm. Mm, mm.
Susanne Ridolfi: Taking as I said, I'm going to say yes to everything, as you said, as well as a yes, yes, yes. But that's also, you do you really look at is this in alignment? If I say yes, is that in alignment with my true values in life? If it's not in alignment, my true values in life, why do I say yes?
Gry Stene: Mm.
Steph Liyanage: And that's a whole journey of its own. Why am I saying yes to this? Why?
Gry Stene: Bye.
