What Actually Matters

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Welcome to the Thrive Mindset Podcast, where manifesting your dreams isn't magic, it's momentum.
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I'm your host, Carrie Dale, entrepreneur, author, and manifestation coach, and I'm here to help you stop holding yourself back and start building the life you've been craving.
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Each week, I'll share real stories, practical tools, and powerful mindset shifts to help you reframe the negative, embrace gratitude, and take aligned action toward your goals.
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If you're ready to uplevel your life, your relationships, your success, then this is your place.
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Let's dive in.
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Welcome back to the Thrive Mindset podcast.
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I'm your host, Carrie Dale, and I'm so glad that you're here with me today.
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I really want to start by saying that if you're listening to this and life feels messy right now, you're exactly in the right place.
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Because today's episode, I'm not coming from a place of having it all figured out.
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In fact, I'm coming from the middle of it, the real raw, unexpected middle of it.
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I want to tell you about my Mother's Day weekend.
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I had it all planned.
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You know how you picture something.
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I had this vision of Sunday morning.
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Coffee, probably still hanging out in my pajamas for a little while.
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My husband sitting there just chatting with me like he normally does.
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My middle son and daughter-in-law coming down and hanging out with us for a little bit.
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And then we'd all go meet his other brothers and their significant others at brunch.
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And we've been looking forward to it.
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And honestly, I was excited, right?
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I was excited finally to get out in the garden and get some plants and flowers in the ground and just have one of those good, happy days.
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Well, that is not what happened.
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The weekend actually started with around five o'clock on Friday.
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Our phones all buzzing with an emergency alert from our daughter's phone.
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She had been in an accident.
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She's out of state from us.
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And it was horrific.
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Actually, my husband didn't even hesitate for a second.
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He just packed his bag and got in the car and took off to go make sure she was okay.
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And I stayed home holding my breath and holding the house together and holding on to hope.
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And that was hard in itself, just sitting in the uncertainty of what?
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Waiting for updates and and you know, just worrying, right?
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And she ultimately, you know, it was it's amazing that she survived, to be honest.
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And I'm so grateful that she did.
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And I'm so grateful to be able to share this story today.
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But during during those first little bit of time, it was terrifying.
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So we get through her and knowing that she's alive and safe and definitely beat up and broken and has lots of metal in her body now, but she's okay.
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And that was hard.
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But then Mother's Day morning arrived.
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And instead of waking up to the coffee and flowers, I woke up to another one of my kids in serious pain.
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And we ended up in the emergency room that morning with his appendix needing to be removed.
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And yeah, that was crazy in itself, too, because apparently there was a lot of emergencies everywhere that weekend.
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And so there was no bed for him at the hospital.
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They had to just wait.
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So we just sat in one ER of one hospital, waiting for them to find a bed in another hospital, and also waiting for them to find a surgeon who was available to do the surgery.
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And we still didn't get it all done until Monday morning when we had his appendectomy.
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But as crazy as all this is, and as hard as it was, here's the one thing I want you to hear because it's the most important thing.
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And that was everyone's gonna be okay.
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Both my kids are gonna be okay.
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And I say that not to skip past like being scared, but because that truth is my anchor in this situation, and that truth is what I kept coming back to every single time my mind wanted to spiral.
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I just kept saying everyone is going to be okay.
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But sitting in the waiting room in a weekend that looked nothing like the one I had planned, I found myself with some serious choices in front of me.
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And that's what I want to talk about.
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Because here's what I've come to understand about the unexpected.
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When it's something as big as a medical emergency or something that feels smaller but still knocks the wind out of you, there are always these moments.
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A split second where you feel hit, right?
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And then that moment where you have a choice.
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And you can either let the fear spiral, you can let the disappointment turn into resentment, you can start the mental math of everything that went wrong and everything you missed, and everything that isn't how it should be.
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And honestly, that spiral is so easy to fall into, it feels almost natural to do it.
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Because when things go sideways, your nervous system wants to go into reaction mode.
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But the other choice you can make is to just stop and take a breath.
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And I don't mean that in a seriously dismissive way.
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I'm not saying that just a breath and everything will be fine.
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I'm saying that the breath is the pause.
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It's that tiny space between what just happened and how you choose to respond.
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In that pause, you get to decide who you want to be in that moment.
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Do you want to be the version of you that's white-knuckling it through that day and counting all the things that didn't happen?
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Or do you want to be the version of me that finds the one real true thing to hold on to?
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For me, in that waiting room, the true thing was that we're all together.
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My family was showing up for each other.
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We were choosing love in the middle of chaos.
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And that that's not nothing.
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That's actually everything.
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You know, the boys set aside their frustrations with their sister on things.
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Everyone showed up just to love on her and make sure that she was going to be okay.
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Then the boys in their own way were teasing their younger brother for having a stomachache and ruining Mother's Day, but it was all in good fun, right?
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It was just all everyone being loving and fun together.
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And then the two in the hospital were facetiming each other, asking who was going to outdo the other one.
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I mean, it it was it was humorous and fun and and and silly, but also it made it better.
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And and just that love, that isn't nothing, right?
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That's actually everything.
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Buying or selling a home is more than just a transaction.
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It's your move.
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It's your next chapter.
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And we're here to make sure that your move is remarkable.
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We know this market inside and out, and we care deeply about helping you find more than just a house.
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We want you to find the place where your life truly thrives.
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Whether you're stepping into your first home, upgrading to something new, or starting something fresh.
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You deserve more than ordinary.
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With the Scott Lewis group, it's your moop.
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Let's make it remarkable.
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I also want to talk about gratitude for a minute because I think it gets misunderstood sometimes.
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Gratitude is not pretending everything is fine when it isn't, it's not slapping like a positive spin on a scary situation and calling it done.
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That's not gratitude.
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That's avoidance.
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And we're not here for that.
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But real gratitude is something different.
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It is a practice of looking for what is true and good, even when the circumstances are hard.
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It doesn't dismiss the hard, it just exists along with it.
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So in a weekend where I didn't get Mother's Day plans that I planned, I also had a husband who didn't think twice about dropping everything for our child.
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I had a son who needed me and I was there.
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I had a family that it loves each other so much, so fiercely, that they show up in the hard moments.
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I had my own capacity to sit in discomfort and not fall apart completely.
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And that's something to be grateful for too.
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You know, the brunch didn't happen.
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My garden didn't get planted.
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And I generally don't care about it right now because gratitude has always had a way of putting those things in a proper place for me.
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Because when you practice it, not just when things are good, but especially when they're not, it becomes like an anchor and it helps you get through those big waves of life.
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I do want to give you something practical to take with you because I think that that's where the real work lives.
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So here are three things that I came back to this weekend and I want to offer to you.
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Number one, take a breath first.
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Before you start fixing, before you pick up the phone and start calling everyone you know, just pause.
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One real intentional breath.
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It sounds almost too simple to matter, but I promise you it does.
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Because that pause is where your power lives.
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You cannot think clearly from a place of panic.
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That breath brings you back to your body and back to the present moment and back to yourself.
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Okay.
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Number two, find one true thing.
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Not a list, not a whole gratitude journal entry if you don't have it in you.
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Just one true thing.
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Something real that is good right now, even if everything around you is hard.
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One person who loves you, one moment of grace, one sign that you're not alone in this.
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That one true thing, use that.
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Hold on to.
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And you don't have to figure it all out.
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You just have to have one positive thing.
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Give yourself permission to feel it and then keep moving.
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You don't have to be okay all the time, you don't have to hold it together perfectly.
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You are allowed to be disappointed.
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You are allowed to grieve the plans that didn't happen.
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You're allowed to sit in a waiting room and feel scared.
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Feel it.
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Let yourself be human.
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And then when you're ready, choose to take the next right step.
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Not the perfect step, just the next step.
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That is what got me through this weekend in the unexpected.
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And it was not by avoiding it, by moving through it with as much grace and gratitude as I could gather.
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We spend a lot of time planning our lives, building routines, setting intentions, creating the vision for how things are gonna go.
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And I believe in all of that.
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You know I do.
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Intentional living is everything to me, but there's also so much that we can't simply control.
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And when the uncontrollable does show up, it has a way of stripping back everything to what's real, to what actually matters.
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It's not the brunch, it's not the garden, it's not the perfectly planned holiday or the picture perfect day, right?
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It's love.
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It's showing up, it's patience with yourself and the people around you.
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It's the phone call you make just to say, I'm thinking of you.
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It's sitting in that waiting room and holding someone's hand.
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It's the husband who gets into his car without hesitation.
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It's the family that bends without breaking.
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That is the life.
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That is what we are building.
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And when we do this mindset work, not a life where nothing goes wrong, a life where we know how to meet what comes with strength and grace and an open heart.
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So, whatever you're doing today, whatever your week has handed you, I want you to know that you have everything you need to get through it.
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Take a breath, find the one true thing, and keep going.
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I thank you for being here with me even on the next week.
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Actually, especially on the next week.
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And until next time, just remember that I believe and you must like.