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Codependency in a Christian marriage rarely looks like what you'd expect. It looks like serving your husband's dinner on a TV tray for seven years. It looks like never having friends of your own. It looks like being the "good Christian wife" on the outside while running on empty on the inside.
In this episode, Tammy Unger — author of the devotional journal Broken to Beloved: Embracing Your Journey to Hope — joins Leneé Pezzano to unpack what codependency actually is, where it comes from, and how it quietly wraps itself around a woman's faith until people-pleasing and devotion start to look like the same thing.
Tammy shares how she learned to set godly boundaries inside a marriage and church community that didn't always understand the changes, why fear — not pride — sits underneath codependency, perfectionism, and people-pleasing alike, and what it looked like to face the spiritual roots underneath the emotional ones after 46 years of marriage.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- What codependency is, and how it's different from ordinary people-pleasing
- Why fear, not pride, is the true root of codependency and perfectionism
- How to set healthy boundaries in a marriage, family, or church community
- What it means to change the motive behind an action instead of just stopping it
- How generational patterns and spiritual strongholds tie into emotional healing
- A simple prayer practice for hearing God's voice more clearly
This conversation is for any Christian woman who has ever felt responsible for everyone else's emotions, mistaken caretaking for love, or wondered why doing "all the right things" still leaves her exhausted.
Mentioned in this episode:
- Tammy Unger's devotional journal, Broken to Beloved: Embracing Your Journey to Hope — tammyunger.com
- Breaking Bondage by Neil Anderson
- Ephesians 3:14-21
- Free Chapter 1 of You Will Make Mistakes by Lenee' Pezzano — leneepezzano.com
🌐 Connect with Lenee' Pezzano and The Redeemed Perfectionist
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