Answer the Void Negative 2: Late Autumn's Lament

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This is a one more mosh pit
production. Why are not We'll ship fire?

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I reckon, It's time to answer
the boy. You good good?

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Let just of it. Boy if
you do a good job and don't want

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you again giving all that you've got, showed them the joy and the blade

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and the ending, and do it
and get the call. Stop pretending to

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play more attentions, wants the moment
ship and as you your head does you

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not even this very small? As
you are? You weird again? Just

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putout that because it's always a damn
Hi, everybody, This is a act

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and this is a podcast. I
just did because I felt like I needed

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to put something out there. I've
been lazy for a while and I hadn't

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really been doing anything creative, so
I just felt obligated to put this out

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keep myself at like a status of
where I'm putting stuff out. This is

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gonna be an episode of Answer the
Void. Welcome to Answer the Void.

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I'm here with my girlfriend Stephanie.
I feel like I could explain everything every

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time because this might be the first
episode somebody's listening to. A couple of

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years ago, I released this a
couple of podcasts called Call of the Void

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and one very much later, but
I had named it call of the Void

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after the sensation when you're standing on
top of a building or a cliff or

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something like that, and it's the
just the brief feeling that you want to

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just throw yourself off of it.
It has nothing to do with suicidal ideation

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or anything like that. It's just
a weird thing your brain does. You

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know, Like when you're driving your
car and it's real curvy and you just

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have this an urge to jerk your
wheel and in front of a semi or

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something, or off a ravine.
Yeah, you see like a kid riding

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her bike on the sidewalk next,
you just have this weird said urge to

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yeah, hit them my kid,
obviously, I mean, like, I

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don't know, it's it makes you
think of weird, impulsive, horrible things.

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It's like, it's just that not
only like throwing yourself off a cliff

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or hitting a kid with your car, but like wanting to throw your cell

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phone in the river or something like
that. It makes you think about doing

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really stupid ship Like you're unloading the
dishwasher and you're like, I wonder how

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hard it would be to stab this
knife into it my stomach or something.

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Yeah, it happens to everybody.
Has nothing to do with like it,

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mentally almost anything like that or it, like I said, suicidal ideation,

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which is, if you have suicidal
ideation, you'll find that it becomes very

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mundane at a point. And that's
I'm gonna keep going with this because I

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got something else I can say about
it. But for copyright reasons, I

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changed the name from Calling the Void
to Answer the Void because I thought,

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I don't know, maybe I had
some really lofty thoughts, some real pie

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in the sky ship where I thought
this was going to actually take off and

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become something at certain points, and
so I changed the name so I could

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get like copyright, and I changed
the name the overarching you know, one

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more mash pit. I changed it
to that because I knew nobody would use

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that. I bought the U r
L all this stuff, and well,

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I didn't really do anything with it. But now this is called Answer the

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Void because of that. So welcome. If you're here your first time,

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I welcome you, and thank you
for listening, and especially thank everybody who's

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been listening since the start. I
really appreciate it. And also I'm gonna

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make a new disclaimer here to kind
of cover my ass nudist claimer. A

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new disclaimer. I'm gonna make outrageous
jokes from time to time in bullshit,

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you know, and exaggerating, not
necessarily admitting to a crime. You know.

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I'm gonna say whack of do stuff
Like if I say you something about

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murdering somebody or burying a body or
something like that, it's jokes, people,

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Okay, I'm not admitting to a
crime. Or if I say like

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I'm out on a meth frolic and
I have little people dressed as cherubs throwing

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peeled grapes soaked in hair went at
me. That didn't really happen, Now,

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didn't I wish it? That sounds
like a hell of a time.

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But also if I say that,
and I make that blanket disclaimer at the

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beginning, I can say stuff that
really happened and it'll just slip right past

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you. Wasn't that wonderful idea?
This podcast is particular one. Once again,

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if you're one of the new people
we have Punch Drunk Podcast, which

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is me and Vinny and Lisa.
For a while it's been Stephanie Um.

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I've had Matt and other people be
part of it. So that's the big

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group podcast. That's what that one
is. But when I do this one,

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you and Vinnie talking about wrestling and
movies, and the other one I

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do is Horrible History Abridged. If
you want to check that one out.

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If you like history and you like
deck jokes, you would like those two

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things together. Get some chocolate and
your peanut butter. That's something you might

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enjoy. I'm gonna keep working on
those. That's both of us together.

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I did the Donner Party by myself, and then I worked on the Execution

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series for like a year, and
then that's when Stephanie came into the picture

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and she helped me out with that, and you know, really big help

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because it took me forever, Like
I had those plans for a while and

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it took me forever to make that
come to fruition, and Stephanie really helped

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a lot on that. And then
there's this one. There's other ship.

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There's ones where I just read something
in ten parts. I read Fear and

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Loathing in Las Vegas. I read
a couple of things from the Internet out

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loud, creepy pastas and copy pastas, which we're going to get into that.

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You just wait. That's a big
that's a favorite thing. And I

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can't stress enough that these are copy
pastas and creepy pastas, and I'll explain

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once again what those are when we
come to that bridge. But I did

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not write these stories. So if
you're the one of those people telling me,

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hey, man, you should write
a movie script about that one,

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I didn't write it. I'm just
reading it. I didn't write it.

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It's not my original writing. I
didn't We're never actually visited by the moth

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Man. Now you don't know that, but yeah, that one was.

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The moth Man was an original of
mine. And also the old Field goat

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Man, that one's mine. But
like for the most part, if I

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say it's a copy pasta creepy pasta, I'm just reading it, okay.

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Also on TikTok, I have like
weird sporadic presence on social media, and

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because TikTok, I can't keep the
vigor up to make videos and stuff every

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day. It's just something I did
whenever I was banned from Facebook, I've

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made TikTok videos. Well I'm banned
from Facebook now again. Um, that's

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a reoccurring thing. I've been banned. This is a relatively new discount,

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isn't a year old? I think
I made it in January. I've been

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banned, yeah, about seven times, so like half the year I've been

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banned. Its last time I was
on thin ice anyway, you know,

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because they know who I am now, so they're gunning for me. I

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went on this post by a group
or page that is one of a more

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liberal leaning, so already I was
playing with fire. But I made a

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joke about like people were posting,
hey, don't spray bleach on your pumpkins

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to preserve them. Use vinegar instead, because squirrels, raccoons and possums blah

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blah blah eat these things. First
of all, i've read that you're not

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filling the thing with bleach. It's
not gonna it's not gonna kill that animal

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if they eat it. Later.
Our water is sanitized and stuff like that.

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Water do you think kids d ain't
on a daily basis, It's the

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same thing. It's chlorine. And
some people said, well, I use

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vinegar anyway, but like that amount
of bleach isn't going to affect those animals

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that much, And I said,
really, I was like I live in

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the rural South, and I eat
most of these things, so I'm not

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really that worried about a little bit
of bleach getting on them. I said,

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I have. I have, of
course, squirrels or my mortal enemy,

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because they filled my attic with pecans
and I'm allergic to pecans. So

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like I was, I was allergic
to my house for a little while,

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I didn't I walked around in a
benadril haze all the time. Yeah,

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sure, haze drinking too. If
you're not familiar. If you take too

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much benadril, you can hallucinate.
It's a dissociative and most people see spiders

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that it's not a good high.
But like I was taking in a low

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enough dose long enough that it affected
my Hypnogogic mania is something I have.

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Hypnogogic mania, which is like your
manic episodes get into your dreams, so

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like it's kind of like sleep paralysis
and you'll open up your eyes and you're

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not moving, but like instead of
sleep paralysis, it was just like park

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where I was just falling asleep.
Like for instance, that window over there,

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I saw somebody walk by twelve ft
off the ground. Yeah, I

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was laying here, and then somebody
opened that door and like put their hand

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in and flicked the ladder, and
I saw that shuts. Well I could

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have just been one of your crazy
exs, always been sneaking into your house.

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Well no, when I looked at
it, I realized I shouldn't even

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been seeing the door from that angle. Like my whole my brain just made

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both hallucinatory like dreams while you were
awake. But anyhow, I said something

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like I wouldn't give a ship.
Hell, I'd go out with a super

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soaker full of bleach and shoot every
squirrel I saw, and I got banned

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for that. You gotta put something
instead of shoot. I don't know,

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but it's it's a silly imagery.
There's a super soaker involved. Well,

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I mean, fucking AI shouldn't be
deciding. Make sure aren't looking at your

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imagery. They've got a list of
trigger words, and they've got people like

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you that are on their short list. And second you said one of those

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trigger words shoot or beat or kill
or dead or anything like that, it's

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gonna they're gonna get you flag.
So I'm banned from Facebook again. But

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on TikTok, I made a video
about how like no longer deal with like

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mental health anymore. And that's not
necessarily true in my material. I'm gonna

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still deal with it. I'm just
I don't want to help you. I

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can't help you. You're talking in
reference just to the podcast. You are

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dealing with your mental health and your
person. Yeah, you're just to clarify.

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Yeah, I'm dumping everything here.
You know, this is my Catharsis.

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This is how this is one of
the things I used to get your

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own thing. This is how I
deal with it. I can't help people.

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I mean I used to fill a
lot of messages from people about mental

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illness and try to help them.
But man, I can pass you know,

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pointing you in the right direction.
That's the best. I can tell

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you what you need to do.
But I can't. I can't really help

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you. You need to go to
a professional for that. And I'm dealing

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with a lot of ship on my
own. I can't help myself most of

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the time. So I'm not gonna
be talking to anybody off the ledge anymore.

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I know it sounds really ugly to
say that, but like empathy overload

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or whatever. Yeah, I have
a lot of empathy for people and that's

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something that's gonna be exploited and abused
really easily. So that's why I really

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kind of want to get out of
that game. Meanwhile, though, I

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can talk about how fucking crazy I
I'm all I want. This is my

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fucking podcast. I can do that, and this is one of the ways

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I used to deal with being nuts. Let's get nuts and I can archive

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it too, you know. And
disclaimer disclaimer disclaimer not admitting to any crimes

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that they won't hold up in court. But yeah, so that's my mental

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health tie, right. I can
talk about being crazy some more here and

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there, but that's about all I'm
going to cover on it right now.

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I've been going through a rough time
lately because I had to go off my

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meds because I'm in a transitional period
in my life right now to where I'm

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less and less physical and able.
So that's what that's what's going on.

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Nothing's right, I'm torn. So
so yeah, mental health, I'll get

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back to you on that one.
But have we got some fun stuff for

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you on this one? Previously mentioned
the creepy Pasta's so I'm gonna read you

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some spooky stories and it's fucking Halloween. Yeah, let's get excited about that.

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But things aren't the same as when
I was younger. You know,

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you never really get into anything Christmas. You get a little bit older,

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Christmas loses all its charm and stuff
like that. It's not as neat as

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it used to be. But oh
yeah, I mean, we're the adults

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that have to do the adults ship. We're the one buying the presents now

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instead of getting on right, the
one having to make things fun and magical

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for the kids. Right. But
at a certain point, you can still

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get kind of a jolly feeling here
and there, but it's just not the

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same in Halloween. Halloween was my
last one to go to where I was

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just like, I can't I don't
get excited anymore about it. But it

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was like my favorite holiday, and
it was still you could still do all

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kinds of Halloween stuff. You can
still eat a bunch of candy, you

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can still dress up as an adult, you can do whatever you want,

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you know, but this doesn't feel
I can't get hopped about anything, and

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that may be because of my depression, but yeah, it's just you get

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older, you're not into stuff.
The magic isn't there of Halloween and it's

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sad to me. I'm sad that
I can't get into anything anymore. I

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feel bad I didn't do any decorations
or anything. We've got Halloween decorations in

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the shop, but then get them
out. Well, our regular decor is

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pretty spooky. Yeah, that's Halloween
themed kind of, that's true. But

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we have those cool inflatables that you
know we were going to put up in

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the yard that we put up last
year that the kids really liked. I

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mean, I say cool, They're
just like, what was the other one?

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I think it was Yoda with a
Halloween button? Yeah, so that

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was pretty cool. Did I tell
you? At work? The other day,

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I was showing my boss a video
of my kids and she was like,

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oh, what what are those scary
masks that that are on the fireplace?

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And she's like, do you have
those up all the time or is

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that a Halloween thing? And I'm
like, no, that's that's all the

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time, and she's like, are
you serious? So yeah, because that's

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so wild to have customers hockey masks
like of the Friday variety, not like

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actual hockey. But is that so
wild? Just a design choice that decoration?

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That's no dumber than the fucking Eat
ProAb Love Live Left Love Horseship.

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But no, I tell you can't
even see the little dioramas we have of

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00:15:03.480 --> 00:15:09.559
Jason and Pamela Vorky's and Candyman leather
Face. I need to get up Michael

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00:15:09.639 --> 00:15:15.879
Myers. At least one. We'll
talk about Original nineteen seventy eight. Michael

209
00:15:15.960 --> 00:15:18.720
Myers, not any of this other
horse ship. Which movie? Did he

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have the mask with the pink hair? The pink hair? Oh no,

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it was a pink mask with blonde
hair. Yeah, because they shot for

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whatever dumb reason they decided to have
that mask. How did that? How

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00:15:31.559 --> 00:15:35.879
did so many people check off on
that? That one scene is sucking?

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Michael Myers has blonde hair. It's
a very very short part of a scene.

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It's even well fucking h two.
Oh, there's one scene where the

216
00:15:43.120 --> 00:15:48.279
mask is completely c g I because
they didn't know what mask they were going

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00:15:48.320 --> 00:15:52.159
to use when they were shooting that
scene, which is something you probably should

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00:15:52.159 --> 00:15:56.519
have fucking figured out by then,
you would think. But more on Halloween

219
00:15:56.759 --> 00:16:02.600
later. Yes, we just saw
Halloween ends. Did you're just white?

220
00:16:02.799 --> 00:16:06.440
I'm just now cooled off enough to
talk about it. But you didn't say

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00:16:06.519 --> 00:16:10.240
Freddy. We need a Freddy.
I've got a Freddie figuring there's a Freddie

222
00:16:10.320 --> 00:16:14.080
up there is there? Yeah?
You remember he was fighting the Freddy versus

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00:16:14.200 --> 00:16:17.799
Jason Jason. Yeah, you remember
he had it like because I had him

224
00:16:17.840 --> 00:16:22.840
where he had his hands around his
neck and he raised That's right. Yeah,

225
00:16:22.919 --> 00:16:25.360
so we got I think we should
get another Freddie. I need a

226
00:16:25.399 --> 00:16:27.639
pin head. Yes, you do
need a pin head. Need we need

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00:16:27.720 --> 00:16:33.559
a lament configuration to sit on?
Yeah, I've had that in my Amazon

228
00:16:33.759 --> 00:16:37.000
cart a couple of times and got
rid of it. But I guess we

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00:16:37.080 --> 00:16:40.639
ought to watch the new new hell
Riser movie. Yeah, yeah, I've

230
00:16:40.679 --> 00:16:44.080
heard I don't I don't know.
I've heard mixed I've heard mixed reviews,

231
00:16:44.360 --> 00:16:48.000
and they've all been either really really
liked it or really really didn't like it.

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00:16:48.080 --> 00:16:52.000
I haven't heard any middle of the
road people or they didn't like it

233
00:16:52.080 --> 00:16:56.919
because the trans person was pin head. I haven't heard anyone complain about that.

234
00:16:56.080 --> 00:17:02.519
But I think that I'm just not
in the same Yeah bullshit that.

235
00:17:02.879 --> 00:17:07.480
Yeah, I don't think we run
in the same social media circles. Everything's

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00:17:07.480 --> 00:17:11.440
woke bullshit. Now, Well,
I'm in all the woke bullshit groups,

237
00:17:11.559 --> 00:17:15.480
so, you know, because it's
all anything that I don't like and complain

238
00:17:15.559 --> 00:17:19.359
about. That's the whole Internet.
It's just like my seat in my latent

239
00:17:19.759 --> 00:17:26.279
racism is it's just a bullhorn for
like people. It's not like it's none

240
00:17:26.279 --> 00:17:29.119
of their sucking business, but they
want a bit about it. And people

241
00:17:29.160 --> 00:17:33.200
were crying about everybody. Somebody's crying
about like a casting they don't like all

242
00:17:33.319 --> 00:17:37.200
the time, and that's you know, and everybody always brings up Michael Keaton

243
00:17:37.319 --> 00:17:41.279
was a great Batman, even though
people thought it was dumb putting him in

244
00:17:41.359 --> 00:17:45.759
there. Heath Ledger's joker. It's
all Batman. Yeah, people will gripe

245
00:17:45.759 --> 00:17:49.440
about anything, you know. There's
the real, real hot button issue of

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00:17:49.559 --> 00:17:55.200
The Little Mermaid going on right now, which is just hilarious because the whole

247
00:17:55.519 --> 00:18:02.200
story the Little Mermaid is all totally
gay to It was a gay fantasy.

248
00:18:02.519 --> 00:18:08.279
It was Hans Christian Anderson's like his
own personal He wished to be part of

249
00:18:08.960 --> 00:18:12.799
part of the world with a man. He was a bisexual, or he

250
00:18:12.920 --> 00:18:15.319
may have been gay and just tried
to fake it for a while. But

251
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yeah, it's like a love letter
to like wanting to be with a man,

252
00:18:19.200 --> 00:18:23.359
and basically he was a fish out
of water. The whining about Aerial

253
00:18:23.480 --> 00:18:26.880
being black is like, wow,
if you want to be if you want

254
00:18:26.920 --> 00:18:30.440
to bitch about ship like that,
you need to go at it as a

255
00:18:30.599 --> 00:18:33.519
deeper level. Yeah, you don't
know. Also, it's a little mermaid

256
00:18:33.799 --> 00:18:38.480
who gives the mermaid. It's a
mythical creature. It's you don't know.

257
00:18:38.640 --> 00:18:45.000
It's a movie for little girls.
Why are there grown ass man bitching about

258
00:18:45.079 --> 00:18:48.319
it all over the internet. It's
just fun. I don't think mermaids would

259
00:18:48.319 --> 00:18:51.640
look anything like that. If they
were real, they would be very terrifying.

260
00:18:51.720 --> 00:18:53.640
They should have made it a horror. I imagine him more like the

261
00:18:53.759 --> 00:18:59.400
Mermaid from Cavin in the Woods at
the end of the movie when the mermaid

262
00:18:59.519 --> 00:19:02.880
comes out, very terrifying, And
I think that's probably what it would be.

263
00:19:02.960 --> 00:19:06.359
Like, Well, we've been bullshitting
for over twenty minutes. Now we

264
00:19:06.519 --> 00:19:10.400
have actual plan. Yeah we have. I do I have. Like you

265
00:19:10.599 --> 00:19:15.759
clearly see this notebook sitting in front
of it that does not look like it's

266
00:19:15.480 --> 00:19:21.839
words writing to me, it's words
anyway. I mentioned Creepy Pasta's earlier in

267
00:19:21.960 --> 00:19:26.480
Copy Pasta's Pasta's creepy or otherwise.
I have to explain what a copy pasta

268
00:19:26.960 --> 00:19:30.200
is. A story on the internet, you know, like you used to

269
00:19:30.359 --> 00:19:34.759
forward chain letters and ship like that. It's copy and paste copy pasta,

270
00:19:34.960 --> 00:19:38.799
so that you copy and paste this
text and you post it somewhere else on

271
00:19:38.880 --> 00:19:42.680
a forum or in an email to
somebody. And then there's a creepy variety

272
00:19:42.759 --> 00:19:47.680
which they call creepy pastas, which
a lot of people mige and older would

273
00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:51.960
know a lot of these stories as
urban legends, you know, like the

274
00:19:52.599 --> 00:19:56.400
dude under the hell. I got
an email or like saw somebody post on

275
00:19:56.480 --> 00:20:00.640
Facebook not long ago about the dude
hiding under the cards flashing people's ankles and

276
00:20:00.720 --> 00:20:04.240
stuff like that, and that one's
been around since like the eighties at least,

277
00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:08.599
people were passing around that rented off, you know. But it's stuff

278
00:20:08.640 --> 00:20:11.839
like the hook in the door and
all that ship. It's those but like

279
00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:15.440
topped out on the Internet and copy
and pasted, and you know, it's

280
00:20:15.480 --> 00:20:19.680
a storytelling passing stories around. And
there are plenty of new ones that come

281
00:20:19.720 --> 00:20:23.279
out that not they're not all just
the old urban legends that we've all heard

282
00:20:23.319 --> 00:20:27.759
at times. All the new ones
that come off are like fiction. They're

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00:20:27.799 --> 00:20:32.160
just short stories people were written,
and I don't know why they get lumped

284
00:20:32.200 --> 00:20:34.400
in with creepy pasta. This one, this one's a classic one, and

285
00:20:34.519 --> 00:20:40.200
it's too long. It's really too
long to fit the crifteria when I think

286
00:20:40.240 --> 00:20:42.480
about a creepy pasta. But this
one's one of the classics. This is

287
00:20:42.519 --> 00:20:47.440
one of the o G s.
And I'm almost nine percent sure I didn't

288
00:20:47.480 --> 00:20:49.759
read it on one of the previous
creepy pastas. I don't know. I

289
00:20:49.839 --> 00:20:55.240
never listened to your shows, so
okay, I think you actually edited one

290
00:20:55.279 --> 00:20:57.839
of those episodes. But whatever I
did, Yeah, but I don't I

291
00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:03.240
don't think it had the Russians.
My ship all runs together. You've read

292
00:21:03.359 --> 00:21:07.279
me the Russian sleep Experiment. I've
heard other you know, I've heard the

293
00:21:07.359 --> 00:21:11.559
story before, so my mind just
is like, I don't know when or

294
00:21:11.640 --> 00:21:14.480
where or was it part of a
podcast or was it. Yeah, I'm

295
00:21:14.519 --> 00:21:18.759
gonna read some that you've heard.
I'm gonna read some that you haven't heard,

296
00:21:18.079 --> 00:21:22.960
and i'm gonna read one that I
haven't read. So I'm gonna react

297
00:21:22.039 --> 00:21:26.400
to it live. We do it, lot, fuck it, I can't

298
00:21:26.440 --> 00:21:30.440
write it and will do it lot
fucking things sucks, but you can comment

299
00:21:30.599 --> 00:21:36.279
all you want. I am just
full of anticipation, and I've got plenty

300
00:21:36.319 --> 00:21:40.839
of these lined up because I'm patting
this whole thing with all other people's material.

301
00:21:41.039 --> 00:21:42.680
I've got plenty of stuff I could
talk about, but like, there's

302
00:21:42.680 --> 00:21:45.599
a lot of things I can't talk
about, so I'm just gonna fill it

303
00:21:45.720 --> 00:21:49.599
with creepy pastas and copy pastas.
So here we go. This one is

304
00:21:49.880 --> 00:21:55.240
the Russian sleep experiment. This is
a classic. It's a good one,

305
00:21:55.759 --> 00:22:00.720
so chim in. Whenever you've got
a question, no continuity question their stuff,

306
00:22:00.000 --> 00:22:06.240
you will overthink everything. But like, if you've got something relevant to

307
00:22:06.440 --> 00:22:07.720
have a problem, no, no, no, no, it's fine,

308
00:22:08.359 --> 00:22:15.240
some kind of slotlot hole, whatsoever, you will go into a fucking reasoning

309
00:22:15.400 --> 00:22:19.799
spiral. I can't help it.
My brain wants to make things make sense.

310
00:22:19.960 --> 00:22:22.960
But no, I'm not going to
try to look for any Rhyo reasons.

311
00:22:23.519 --> 00:22:29.960
Limit yourself to five to five okay, and listeners, if you have

312
00:22:30.039 --> 00:22:33.559
any questions while we're reading this,
just just call in live. Let's go.

313
00:22:33.799 --> 00:22:37.599
Frasier Crane is here to listen.
Yeah, we're gonna take some calls

314
00:22:37.920 --> 00:22:42.880
and then we're gonna get the let
out. God, you might do the

315
00:22:42.960 --> 00:22:49.160
six package six later mandatory Metallica.
The Russian Sleep Experiment. This one's pretty

316
00:22:49.200 --> 00:22:52.720
long, like I said, so
I'm just going to kind of rush through

317
00:22:52.759 --> 00:22:56.759
it, So just kind of pay
attention. Russian researchers in late nineteen forties

318
00:22:56.880 --> 00:23:02.279
kept five people awake for fifteen days
using perimental gas based stimulant. They were

319
00:23:02.359 --> 00:23:07.519
kept in a sealed environment to carefully
monitor their oxygen intakes so the gas didn't

320
00:23:07.599 --> 00:23:11.279
kill them since it was toxic and
high concentrations. This was before closed circuit

321
00:23:11.400 --> 00:23:17.880
cameras, so they had only microphones
and five inch thick glass porthole sized windows

322
00:23:18.039 --> 00:23:21.920
in the chamber to monitor them.
The chamber was stocked with books, cots

323
00:23:22.079 --> 00:23:26.039
to sleep on, but no betting, running water and a toilet, and

324
00:23:26.279 --> 00:23:30.319
enough dried food to last all five
for over a month. The test subjects

325
00:23:30.359 --> 00:23:33.920
were political prisoners deemed enemies of the
state during World War Two. Everything was

326
00:23:34.000 --> 00:23:38.920
fine for the first five days.
The subjects hardly complained, having been promised

327
00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:42.720
falsely that they would be freed if
they submitted to the test and did not

328
00:23:42.920 --> 00:23:48.160
sleep for thirty days. Their conversations
and activities were monitored, and it was

329
00:23:48.279 --> 00:23:52.119
noted that they continued to talk about
increasingly traumatic incidents in their past, and

330
00:23:52.200 --> 00:23:56.440
the general tone of their conversations took
on a darker aspect after the four day

331
00:23:56.519 --> 00:24:00.799
mark. After five days, they
started to complain about the circumstances and events

332
00:24:00.880 --> 00:24:06.359
that led them to where they were, and started to demonstrate sepia paranoia.

333
00:24:06.599 --> 00:24:11.039
They stopped talking to each other and
begin alternately whispering to the microphones and one

334
00:24:11.279 --> 00:24:15.640
way mirror portholes. Oddly, they
all seemed to think that they could win

335
00:24:15.720 --> 00:24:21.160
the trust of the experimenters by turning
over their comrades the other subjects in captivity

336
00:24:21.279 --> 00:24:25.240
with them. At first, the
researchers suspected this was an effect of the

337
00:24:25.319 --> 00:24:29.200
gas itself. After nine days,
the first of them started screaming. He

338
00:24:29.359 --> 00:24:33.119
ran the length of the chamber repeatedly
yelling at the top of his lungs for

339
00:24:33.240 --> 00:24:37.039
three hours straight. He continued attempting
the scream, but was only able to

340
00:24:37.119 --> 00:24:41.400
produce occasional squeaks. So this is
basically when you have like when you're supermanic

341
00:24:41.480 --> 00:24:45.519
and don't sleep for a few days. Yeah, pretty much. That's that's

342
00:24:45.519 --> 00:24:47.920
what it is. That is what
happens every couple of months. It's just

343
00:24:48.119 --> 00:24:52.359
gaseous mannic. The researchers postulated that
he had physically torn his vocal cord.

344
00:24:52.559 --> 00:24:56.799
The most surprising thing about this behavior
is how the other captives reacted to it,

345
00:24:57.039 --> 00:25:00.720
or rather didn't react to it.
They can tinued whispering to the microphones

346
00:25:00.839 --> 00:25:06.519
until the second of the captives started
to scream. The two non screaming captives

347
00:25:06.559 --> 00:25:11.160
took the book apart, smeared page
after page with their own feces, and

348
00:25:11.279 --> 00:25:15.839
pasted them calmly over the glass portholes. The screaming promptly stopped, so did

349
00:25:15.920 --> 00:25:19.759
the whispering to the microphones. After
three more days passed, the researchers checked

350
00:25:19.799 --> 00:25:23.480
the microphones hourly to make sure they
were working, since they thought it was

351
00:25:23.519 --> 00:25:29.839
impossible that no sound could be coming
with five people inside. The oxygen consumption

352
00:25:30.039 --> 00:25:33.440
in the chamber indicated that all five
men must still be alive. In fact,

353
00:25:33.519 --> 00:25:37.359
it was them out of oxygen five
people would consume at a very heavy

354
00:25:37.559 --> 00:25:42.200
level of strenuous exercise. On the
morning of the fourteenth day, the researchers

355
00:25:42.319 --> 00:25:47.799
did something they said they would not
do to get a reaction from the captives.

356
00:25:48.119 --> 00:25:52.720
They used the intercomm inside of the
chamber, hoping to provoke any response

357
00:25:52.799 --> 00:25:56.480
from the captives they were afraid were
either dead or vegetables. They announced,

358
00:25:56.680 --> 00:26:02.559
we're opening the chamber to test them
microphone. Step away from the door and

359
00:26:02.759 --> 00:26:06.960
lie flat on the floor, or
you will be shot. Compliance will earn

360
00:26:07.119 --> 00:26:12.319
one of you your immediate freedom.
To their surprised they heard a single phrase

361
00:26:12.400 --> 00:26:18.160
in a calm voice response, we
no longer want to be freed. Debate

362
00:26:18.279 --> 00:26:22.960
broke out among the researchers and the
military forces funding the research. Unable to

363
00:26:22.119 --> 00:26:26.880
provoke any more response using the intercom, it was finally decided to open the

364
00:26:27.000 --> 00:26:32.880
chamber at midnight on the fifteenth day. The chamber was flushed of the stimulant

365
00:26:33.000 --> 00:26:37.319
gas and filled with fresh air,
and immediately voices from the microphone began to

366
00:26:37.400 --> 00:26:41.880
object. Three different voices begin begging, as if pleading for the life of

367
00:26:42.039 --> 00:26:45.960
loved ones, to turn the gas
back on. The chamber was opened and

368
00:26:47.079 --> 00:26:52.000
the soldiers sent in to retrieve the
test subjects. They begin to scream louder

369
00:26:52.119 --> 00:26:55.960
than ever, and so did the
soldiers when they saw what was inside.

370
00:26:56.359 --> 00:27:00.759
Four of the five subjects were still
alive, although no one could rightly call

371
00:27:00.880 --> 00:27:04.920
the state that any of them were
in life. The food rations past day

372
00:27:06.039 --> 00:27:08.799
five had not been so much as
touched. There were chunks of meat from

373
00:27:08.839 --> 00:27:14.240
the dead test subjects thighs, and
chest stuffed into the drain in the center

374
00:27:14.279 --> 00:27:18.799
of the chamber, blocking the drain
and allowing four inches of water to accumulate

375
00:27:18.880 --> 00:27:22.359
on the floor. Precisely how much
of the water on the floor was actually

376
00:27:22.440 --> 00:27:27.680
blood was never determined. All four
surviving test subjects also had large portions of

377
00:27:27.799 --> 00:27:33.319
muscle and skin torn away from their
bodies. The destruction of flesh and exposed

378
00:27:33.400 --> 00:27:38.359
bone on their fingertips indicated that the
wounds were inflicted by hand, not with

379
00:27:38.559 --> 00:27:45.400
teeth, as the researchers initially thought. Closer examination of the position and angles

380
00:27:45.519 --> 00:27:48.279
of the wounds indicated that most,
if not all, of them were self

381
00:27:48.359 --> 00:27:53.480
inflicted. I imagining, these guys
look like a dead fish that's been floating

382
00:27:53.559 --> 00:28:06.960
and other fish have been eating it. Yeah, pretty much all they're all

383
00:28:07.359 --> 00:28:10.920
like pale and gross and slimy,
like a bunch of cave salamanders. And

384
00:28:11.000 --> 00:28:15.359
then they just got these massive open
wounds. The abdominal organs below the rib

385
00:28:15.440 --> 00:28:19.759
cage of all four test subjects had
been removed. While the heart, lungs,

386
00:28:19.839 --> 00:28:23.960
and diaphragm remained in place, the
skin and most of the muscles attached

387
00:28:25.039 --> 00:28:27.799
the ribs had been ripped off,
exposing the lungs through the rib cage.

388
00:28:27.920 --> 00:28:32.640
All the blood, vessels and organs
remained intact. They just had been taken

389
00:28:32.680 --> 00:28:37.000
out and laid out on the floor. Finding out around the eviscerated but still

390
00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:41.960
living bodies of the subjects, the
digestive tract of all four could be seen

391
00:28:41.319 --> 00:28:47.839
to be working digesting food. It
quickly became apparent that what they were digesting

392
00:28:48.279 --> 00:28:51.839
was their own flesh that they had
ripped off and eaten. Over the course

393
00:28:51.920 --> 00:28:56.440
of days, most of the soldiers
were rushing special operatives at the facility,

394
00:28:56.559 --> 00:29:00.799
but still many refused to return to
the chamber to remove the test subjects.

395
00:29:00.000 --> 00:29:04.759
They continued to scream to be left
in the chamber and alternately bagged and demanded

396
00:29:04.799 --> 00:29:10.240
that the gas be turned back on
less they fall asleep. To everyone's surprise,

397
00:29:10.359 --> 00:29:14.160
the test subjects put up a fierce
fight in the process of being removed

398
00:29:14.240 --> 00:29:18.720
from the chamber. One of the
Russian soldiers died from having his throat ripped

399
00:29:18.759 --> 00:29:22.720
out. Another was gravely injured by
having his testicles ripped off and an artery

400
00:29:22.799 --> 00:29:26.680
in his legs severed by one of
the subject's teeth. Another five of the

401
00:29:26.799 --> 00:29:33.240
soldiers lost their lives if you count
once that committed suicide in the weeks following

402
00:29:33.319 --> 00:29:37.319
the incident. In the struggle,
one of the four living subjects had his

403
00:29:37.440 --> 00:29:42.400
spleen ruptured and he bled out almost
immediately. The medical researches attempted to sedate

404
00:29:42.599 --> 00:29:47.680
him, but this proved impossible.
He was injected with more than ten times

405
00:29:47.839 --> 00:29:52.799
the human dose of morphine derivative and
still fought like a cornered animal, breaking

406
00:29:52.880 --> 00:29:56.680
the ribs and arm of one doctor. Why would they give him that much

407
00:29:56.920 --> 00:30:03.799
morphine? Yeah, I know it's
Russia and they're probably real sloppy that they're

408
00:30:03.799 --> 00:30:07.720
probably giving the crocodile, you know
what, crocodid. We might do a

409
00:30:07.799 --> 00:30:10.279
show about it, or will be
a segment on the show, but we

410
00:30:10.440 --> 00:30:14.799
will talk about crocodile. The story
is so brutal. Could you imagine heating

411
00:30:14.880 --> 00:30:18.799
this for the first time if you
were like teenager and you've never read anything

412
00:30:18.920 --> 00:30:25.680
else like this, and this sounds
like exactly. It is so over the

413
00:30:25.799 --> 00:30:30.359
top, and it's edgy epic like
edge Lord bullshit. I mean it's pretty

414
00:30:30.400 --> 00:30:34.920
well written, but could you imagine
being fourteen and you're just trying to see

415
00:30:34.960 --> 00:30:38.839
what funked up ship you can find
on the Internet and like coming across this

416
00:30:38.960 --> 00:30:42.039
and be like, oh my god, this is this is time as fun

417
00:30:42.160 --> 00:30:47.160
compared to like most ship we were
looking at back they we were looking at

418
00:30:47.279 --> 00:30:49.319
rotten dot com. Oh yeah,
yeah, I wasn't a computer kit.

419
00:30:49.440 --> 00:30:55.880
I wasn't allowed access to our home
computer because we got a home computer when

420
00:30:55.920 --> 00:30:59.039
I was fourteen. Yeah, my
mom had one, but it was she

421
00:30:59.200 --> 00:31:02.599
did taxes, so I wasn't allowed
to use her work computer. So yeah,

422
00:31:02.640 --> 00:31:04.880
I missed out on a lot of
that early Internet culture. Well,

423
00:31:04.960 --> 00:31:10.759
there's Internet historians all over YouTube that'll
tell you all about it. I don't

424
00:31:10.839 --> 00:31:15.880
care, though. You tell me
enough, and then if there's something disturbing

425
00:31:17.039 --> 00:31:19.799
enough worth mentioning, I'll mention it. Yeah. Okay. When his heart

426
00:31:19.920 --> 00:31:23.119
was seen to beat for a full
two minutes after he had bled out,

427
00:31:23.200 --> 00:31:27.559
to the point that there was more
air in his vascular system than blood,

428
00:31:27.839 --> 00:31:32.079
it would lost prim and it wouldn't
done anything. I mean, you have

429
00:31:32.279 --> 00:31:37.039
like a pulmonary embolism, or something
like that's anyway you told me not to

430
00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:40.759
get into the Let's keep moving here, okay. Even after it stopped,

431
00:31:40.799 --> 00:31:45.759
he continued to scream and fell for
another three minutes, struggling into attack anyone

432
00:31:45.839 --> 00:31:48.720
in reach, and just repeating the
word more over and over, weaker and

433
00:31:48.839 --> 00:31:53.480
weaker, until he finally fell silent. The surviving three test subjects were heavily

434
00:31:53.599 --> 00:31:59.880
restrained and moved to a medical facility. The two with intact vocal cords contin

435
00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:04.720
penuously begging for the gas, demanding
to be kept awake. The most injured

436
00:32:04.759 --> 00:32:08.559
of the three was taken to the
only surgical operating room that the facility had.

437
00:32:08.920 --> 00:32:14.359
In the process of preparing the subject
to have his organs placed back within

438
00:32:14.480 --> 00:32:19.240
his body, it was found that
he was effectively immune to the sedative that

439
00:32:19.359 --> 00:32:23.039
they had given him to prepare him
for the surgery. He fought furiously against

440
00:32:23.079 --> 00:32:27.839
the restraints. When the anesthetic gas
was brought out to put him under,

441
00:32:28.000 --> 00:32:32.519
he managed to tear most of the
way through a four inch wide leather strap

442
00:32:32.720 --> 00:32:37.160
on one wrist, even through the
weight of a two hundred pounds soldier holding

443
00:32:37.279 --> 00:32:42.240
that wrist as well. It took
only a little more in aesthetic than normal

444
00:32:42.359 --> 00:32:46.079
to put him under, and the
instant his eyelids fluttered and closed his heart

445
00:32:46.160 --> 00:32:51.079
stop. In the autopsy of the
test subject that died on the operating table,

446
00:32:51.160 --> 00:32:54.240
it was found that his blood had
tripled the normal level of oxygen.

447
00:32:54.559 --> 00:32:59.720
His muscles that were still attached to
a skeleton were badly torn, and he

448
00:32:59.799 --> 00:33:04.440
had broken nine bones and the struggle
to not be subdued. Most of them

449
00:33:04.519 --> 00:33:08.160
were from the force his own muscles
had exerted on them. The second survivor

450
00:33:08.319 --> 00:33:13.039
had been the first of the group
of five to start screaming. His vocal

451
00:33:13.119 --> 00:33:16.079
cords destroyed. He was unable to
bag or object to surgery, and he

452
00:33:16.200 --> 00:33:22.799
only reacted by shaking his head violently
in disapproval. When the anesthetic gas was

453
00:33:22.880 --> 00:33:28.400
brought near him, he shook his
head yes when someone suggested reluctantly they try

454
00:33:28.519 --> 00:33:32.880
the surgery without anesthetic, and did
not react for the entire six hour procedure

455
00:33:32.920 --> 00:33:38.279
of replacing his abdominal organs and attempting
to cover them with what remained of his

456
00:33:38.400 --> 00:33:45.279
skin. The surgeon presiding stated repeatedly
that it shouldn't be medically possible for the

457
00:33:45.359 --> 00:33:50.400
patient to still be alive. One
terrified nurse assisting the surgery stated that she

458
00:33:50.559 --> 00:33:55.440
had seen the patient's mouth curl into
a smile several times whenever his eyes met

459
00:33:55.519 --> 00:34:00.759
hers. When the surgery ended,
the subject looked at the surge and began

460
00:34:00.839 --> 00:34:05.920
to wheeze loudly, attempting to talk
while struggling. Assuming this must be something

461
00:34:06.000 --> 00:34:09.519
of drastic importance, the surgeon had
a pen and a pad fetched so the

462
00:34:09.599 --> 00:34:14.880
patient could write his message. It
was simple keep cutting. The other two

463
00:34:14.960 --> 00:34:19.880
test subjects were given the same surgery, both without anesthetic as well, although

464
00:34:19.960 --> 00:34:23.199
they had to be injected with a
paralytic for the duration of the operation.

465
00:34:23.880 --> 00:34:30.639
The surgeon found it impossible performed the
operation while the patients laughed continuously. Once

466
00:34:30.719 --> 00:34:35.880
paralyzed, the subject could only follow
the attending researchers with his eyes. The

467
00:34:35.960 --> 00:34:40.360
paralytic cleared their system in an abnormally
short period of time, and they were

468
00:34:40.400 --> 00:34:45.480
soon trying to escape their bonds.
The moment they could speak, they were

469
00:34:45.559 --> 00:34:50.760
again asking for the stimulant gas.
The researchers tried, asking why they had

470
00:34:50.840 --> 00:34:53.880
injured themselves while they had ripped out
their own guts, and why they wanted

471
00:34:53.920 --> 00:35:00.239
to be given the gas again.
Only one response was given. All three

472
00:35:00.320 --> 00:35:07.440
subjects restraints were reinforced and they were
placed back into the chamber awaiting determination as

473
00:35:07.480 --> 00:35:10.079
to what should be done with them. The researchers, facing the wrath of

474
00:35:10.159 --> 00:35:16.199
their military benefactors for having failed the
stated goals of the project, considered euthanizing

475
00:35:16.360 --> 00:35:22.960
the surviving subjects. The commanding officer, who was x KGB, instead saw

476
00:35:22.079 --> 00:35:27.119
potential and wanted to see what would
happen if they put back on the gas.

477
00:35:27.480 --> 00:35:32.039
The researchers strongly objected, but were
overalled. In preparation for being sealed

478
00:35:32.079 --> 00:35:37.559
in the chamber again, the subjects
were connected to an e G monitor and

479
00:35:37.679 --> 00:35:43.400
had their restraints padded for long term
confinement. To everyone's surprise, all three

480
00:35:43.639 --> 00:35:46.760
stopped struggling the moment it was let
slip that they were going back on the

481
00:35:46.840 --> 00:35:52.199
gas. It was obvious that at
this point all three were putting up a

482
00:35:52.320 --> 00:35:55.519
great struggle to stay awake. One
of the subjects that could speak was humming

483
00:35:55.639 --> 00:36:01.000
loudly and continuously. The mute subject
was straining his legs against the leather bonds

484
00:36:01.199 --> 00:36:06.039
with all his mind first left,
then right, then left again for something

485
00:36:06.119 --> 00:36:09.639
to focus on. The remaining subject
was holding his head off his pillow and

486
00:36:09.800 --> 00:36:15.800
blinking rapidly. Having been the first
to be wired for eg most of the

487
00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:22.000
researchers were monitoring his brain waves,
and surprise, they were normal most of

488
00:36:22.079 --> 00:36:27.079
the time, but sometimes flatlined inexplicably. It looked as if he were repeatedly

489
00:36:27.400 --> 00:36:31.559
suffering brain death before returning to normal. As they focused on paper scrolling out

490
00:36:31.719 --> 00:36:37.639
of the new brain wave monitor,
only one nurse saw his eyes slip shut

491
00:36:37.760 --> 00:36:42.239
at the same moment his head hit
the pillow. His brain waves immediately changed

492
00:36:42.360 --> 00:36:45.400
to that of deep sleep, then
flatlined for the last time as his heart

493
00:36:45.519 --> 00:36:52.320
simultaneously stopped. The only remaining subject
that could speak started screaming to be sealed

494
00:36:52.400 --> 00:36:55.639
in. Now his brain waves showed
the same flat as one who had just

495
00:36:55.840 --> 00:37:00.679
died from falling asleep. The commander
gave the order to seal the chamber with

496
00:37:00.880 --> 00:37:06.320
both subjects inside, as well as
three researchers. One of the named three

497
00:37:06.559 --> 00:37:10.559
immediately drew his gun and shot the
commander point blank between the eyes, then

498
00:37:10.679 --> 00:37:15.599
turned the gun on the mute subject
and blew his brains out as well.

499
00:37:15.920 --> 00:37:19.960
He pointed his gun at the remaining
subject, still restrained to the bed,

500
00:37:20.239 --> 00:37:23.639
as the remaining members of the medical
and research team fled the room. I

501
00:37:23.679 --> 00:37:28.119
won't be locked in here with these
things, not with you, he screamed

502
00:37:28.159 --> 00:37:30.679
at the man strapped to the table. What are you, he demanded,

503
00:37:30.880 --> 00:37:35.599
I must know? The subject smiled. Have you forgotten so easily? The

504
00:37:35.679 --> 00:37:39.360
subject asked? Were weird? The
madness that lurks within you, all begging

505
00:37:39.480 --> 00:37:44.800
to be fruit at every moment in
your deepest animal line? We are what

506
00:37:45.000 --> 00:37:49.760
you hide from in your beds every
night. We are what you sedate into

507
00:37:49.920 --> 00:37:54.599
silence and paralysis when you go to
the nocturnal haven where we cannot tread.

508
00:37:54.960 --> 00:38:00.280
The researcher paused. Then I aimed
at the subject's heart and fired the e

509
00:38:00.599 --> 00:38:07.119
G flatlined as the subject weakly choked
out, so merely free. And that's

510
00:38:07.159 --> 00:38:10.880
the Russian sleep experiment. I gotta
say, it's kind of one of those

511
00:38:10.920 --> 00:38:15.039
situations, like a lot of movies
and books that are like, wow,

512
00:38:15.159 --> 00:38:20.079
this is really cool, and then
for somehow the end just kind of de

513
00:38:21.760 --> 00:38:25.000
yeah exactly, I was thinking,
like a deflating condom or something. Yeah,

514
00:38:25.159 --> 00:38:30.800
so nearly well, yeah, then
none of the ship happens, obviously,

515
00:38:30.960 --> 00:38:36.119
But even for like Russia or them
a lot for being just like having

516
00:38:36.239 --> 00:38:39.760
no regard for human life and stuff
like that. It's even wacky and outlined

517
00:38:39.800 --> 00:38:45.280
dish for them to be Russians.
Yeah, I guess it's just vague enough,

518
00:38:45.639 --> 00:38:49.719
but also so detailed. Well,
you know, the Germans had like

519
00:38:49.800 --> 00:38:53.519
a mangle had ship going on like
this, like making math back in the

520
00:38:53.599 --> 00:38:59.800
barrier, doing all kinds of human
experiments. So it's not far fetched in

521
00:39:00.159 --> 00:39:05.840
that way, but just how grotesque
the test subjects, the war criminals or

522
00:39:05.880 --> 00:39:08.840
whatever what they did to themselves.
It's like, oh, okay, so

523
00:39:09.360 --> 00:39:16.079
this dude ripped through a leather strap
with one hand, existing solely on his

524
00:39:16.239 --> 00:39:21.760
own flesh. Yeah, ripping their
own guts out and just laying them out,

525
00:39:22.320 --> 00:39:25.159
and then then he hasn't eaten anything
except his own buy mus It's too

526
00:39:25.360 --> 00:39:29.800
ridiculous, that's the thing. It's
like, it's like and they ripped all

527
00:39:29.840 --> 00:39:34.079
their guts, are rude them out. You can do horrible things like that,

528
00:39:34.440 --> 00:39:37.519
But like whoever wrote this went real
far with it, real far out

529
00:39:38.000 --> 00:39:44.119
on the grammatical errors, and it's
a good story. Yeah, we're just

530
00:39:44.199 --> 00:39:47.639
saying that there's no doubt that people
throughout history and still today have done horrible

531
00:39:47.800 --> 00:39:52.400
things to other people. The names
of military sciences, like Unit seven thirty

532
00:39:52.480 --> 00:39:55.920
one. That's one of those things
where I wanted to do a podcast about

533
00:39:55.960 --> 00:40:00.519
it, but I can't make anything
funny. It's just, oh, fucking

534
00:40:00.639 --> 00:40:04.360
horrible. So look into that one
for yourself. We get horrible, but

535
00:40:04.519 --> 00:40:07.719
only if we can have a little
fun. Like I'm talking like wacky stuff.

536
00:40:07.840 --> 00:40:12.239
Unit seven thirty one. They're like
freeze the guy's arms so they can

537
00:40:12.360 --> 00:40:15.519
like hit it with a hammer,
boldness skin of his arms, so ship

538
00:40:15.679 --> 00:40:21.960
like that just like really just stole
that from Jason X. No, that's

539
00:40:21.960 --> 00:40:24.599
actually a fucking thing they did.
Have you ever seen any of the experiments?

540
00:40:24.760 --> 00:40:28.639
I didn't say. He got a
lady and like froze her head with

541
00:40:28.800 --> 00:40:32.239
liquid nitrogen and then like broke her
head on the table. That's his dude's

542
00:40:32.360 --> 00:40:37.360
arm, Get it roight. Wasn't
there a guy? Was it that movie?

543
00:40:37.519 --> 00:40:40.880
Was it that the guy's arm gets
frozen and breaks off? Oh that's

544
00:40:42.039 --> 00:40:45.159
snow Piercer. Oh yeah, okay, okay, yeah, this one's shorter.

545
00:40:45.559 --> 00:40:49.679
I'm not sure I'll remember this one. It's weird. It's called The

546
00:40:49.760 --> 00:40:52.960
Woman in the Oven. I don't
think I've heard of this one. During

547
00:40:52.000 --> 00:40:57.480
the summer of nineteen eighty three and
a quiet town near Minneapolis, Minnesota,

548
00:40:57.719 --> 00:41:00.480
the charred body of a woman was
found in inside the kitchen stove of a

549
00:41:00.599 --> 00:41:06.079
small farmhouse. A video camera was
also found in the kitchen, standing on

550
00:41:06.159 --> 00:41:10.360
a tripod pointing at the oven.
No tape was found inside the camera at

551
00:41:10.400 --> 00:41:15.440
the time. Although the scene was
originally labeled as a homicide by police,

552
00:41:15.559 --> 00:41:21.199
and unmarked VHS, tape was later
discovered at the bottom of the farm's well,

553
00:41:21.400 --> 00:41:25.119
which had apparently dried up earlier that
year. Despite its worn condition and

554
00:41:25.239 --> 00:41:30.719
the fact that it contained no audio, police were still able to view the

555
00:41:30.800 --> 00:41:35.199
contents of the tape. It depicted
a woman recording herself in front of a

556
00:41:35.360 --> 00:41:38.960
video camera, seemingly using the same
camera that the police found in the kitchen.

557
00:41:39.280 --> 00:41:45.599
After positioning the camera to include both
her and her kitchen stove in its

558
00:41:45.679 --> 00:41:49.159
view, she turned on the oven, opened the door, crawled inside,

559
00:41:49.440 --> 00:41:52.760
and then closed the door behind her. After eight minutes into the video,

560
00:41:53.000 --> 00:41:59.119
the oven could be seen shaking violently. At this point, thick black smoke

561
00:41:59.320 --> 00:42:02.440
emanated from it for the remaining forty
five minutes of the video, until the

562
00:42:02.519 --> 00:42:07.400
batteries and the camera died. It
remained in its stationary position. To avoid

563
00:42:07.519 --> 00:42:13.480
disturbing the local community, The police
never released any information about the tape or

564
00:42:13.519 --> 00:42:16.679
even the fact that it was found. Police were also not able to determine

565
00:42:16.800 --> 00:42:21.440
who put the tape in the well
or why the hot and stature of the

566
00:42:21.559 --> 00:42:24.760
woman in the video did not come
close to matching the body that they had

567
00:42:24.800 --> 00:42:30.000
found in the oven. That's stupid. There's your little plot twist. What

568
00:42:30.159 --> 00:42:32.719
the fuck? Why didn't they have
met that part? It's weird enough and

569
00:42:32.840 --> 00:42:37.320
mysterious of how this all happened.
Why they have to make the person in

570
00:42:37.400 --> 00:42:42.840
the oven somebody else which is charred
remains. Yeah, that's going to be

571
00:42:43.000 --> 00:42:45.519
different, for one, I mean, how they determined it was that different?

572
00:42:45.800 --> 00:42:50.880
Well, it sounds like it's like
the Mr. Hand video where it's

573
00:42:50.960 --> 00:42:54.239
like, yeah, that's probably him
getting funcked by that horse, but but

574
00:42:54.360 --> 00:42:59.199
it's probably not the time that he
actually died. So he has a video

575
00:42:59.280 --> 00:43:01.599
of her. This isn't the first
person that was cooked in that oven.

576
00:43:01.840 --> 00:43:07.679
Maybe she has a cult and and
they all go feel themselves in the oven

577
00:43:07.760 --> 00:43:12.000
like Midsummer when the old people just
jump off the cliff. Oh sorry,

578
00:43:12.039 --> 00:43:14.920
spoiler alert, they get really old
and it's like, well, it's your

579
00:43:14.960 --> 00:43:17.480
time to die, so go lock
yourself in this oven and record it.

580
00:43:19.000 --> 00:43:22.400
I think that's what happened, Scandinavian
oven death. Yeah yeah, okay,

581
00:43:22.519 --> 00:43:28.320
that makes more sense. It's the
bloodline of the witch that got cooked by

582
00:43:28.480 --> 00:43:30.719
Hanseling Gretel. Like, this is
how they pay penance for the rest of

583
00:43:30.760 --> 00:43:35.880
their lives. They this is their
hell. Yeah, they have to cook

584
00:43:35.960 --> 00:43:39.119
themselves in the oven. Okay,
this one I have never read. I

585
00:43:39.239 --> 00:43:44.679
had read the Oven one before,
but this one is why I haven't read.

586
00:43:44.760 --> 00:43:47.920
And it was suggested as a good
short creepy pasta, so maybe shitty.

587
00:43:47.960 --> 00:43:52.360
Who knows. But I've also seen
when I was googling it, I

588
00:43:52.440 --> 00:43:58.519
saw somebody had searched dirty window creepy
pasta explained. So this one may be

589
00:43:58.679 --> 00:44:00.480
a little confusing, It may be
a little murky. I don't know.

590
00:44:00.639 --> 00:44:05.599
But here we go, ambiguous dirty
window. I wasn't sure where to start.

591
00:44:05.840 --> 00:44:08.239
My father had lived in this old
shack of a house for his entire

592
00:44:08.280 --> 00:44:13.119
adult life. In his later years, he'd gone fully around the bend.

593
00:44:13.440 --> 00:44:17.480
Old trash bottles mostly lay scattered here
and there. A few of the walls

594
00:44:17.559 --> 00:44:22.400
were peeling and cracking water stains blotted
the roof. I could scarcely believe the

595
00:44:22.440 --> 00:44:29.000
old man had actually existed within this
space. I was simultaneously guilty I'd never

596
00:44:29.199 --> 00:44:32.880
visited him, and very very relieved
I hadn't. The window That's where I

597
00:44:32.960 --> 00:44:38.119
finally began. The window in the
rear bedroom seemed like something I could handle

598
00:44:38.159 --> 00:44:43.159
at the moment. With a rag
and some origins scented spray, I set

599
00:44:43.239 --> 00:44:47.119
to work. Ages of dark grime
and hardened clusters of molds stripped off the

600
00:44:47.199 --> 00:44:52.719
window in large flakes. I let
them fall to the floor because i'd have

601
00:44:52.840 --> 00:44:55.480
to clean that third way as well. I scrubbed down one panel, then

602
00:44:55.519 --> 00:45:00.639
the next, then the third.
Each one seemed to be more difficult to

603
00:45:00.760 --> 00:45:02.760
clean than the last. How do
he, neighbor? The voice gave me

604
00:45:02.840 --> 00:45:07.159
a start. I jumped back from
the window as a tall man in a

605
00:45:07.239 --> 00:45:12.360
ball cap and thick, scruffy beard
appeared behind the glass. Who the hell

606
00:45:12.400 --> 00:45:15.320
are you, I demanded, still
dealing with the surprise. The bearded man

607
00:45:15.480 --> 00:45:21.199
laughed, his fat stomach jiggling behind
his flannel shirt, calling you neighbor.

608
00:45:21.280 --> 00:45:24.280
Didn't give it away, huh,
he smirked. The names Sal Sal bunchkin

609
00:45:24.639 --> 00:45:29.400
like munchkin, but a bunch of
them. He laughed again, but all

610
00:45:29.480 --> 00:45:34.199
I could do was study his laugh
lined face with just distrust. What do

611
00:45:34.280 --> 00:45:37.480
you want? I asked, Wow, direct, aren't you? He stepped

612
00:45:37.559 --> 00:45:40.559
up to the window and leaned on
the sill, arms folded. Just wanted

613
00:45:40.599 --> 00:45:45.760
to welcome you to the neighborhood.
I saw someone new was rummaging around this

614
00:45:45.880 --> 00:45:50.880
old house and figured it was worth
checking into Behind the man behind sal the

615
00:45:51.000 --> 00:45:57.119
perfect green grass and healthy tree line
painted the perfect image of rural paradise.

616
00:45:57.440 --> 00:46:01.000
The trees rustled gently in the breeze, and birds circled in the summer sky.

617
00:46:01.519 --> 00:46:06.400
So you're the old man's kid,
He scratched his beard absently. Didn't

618
00:46:06.440 --> 00:46:08.960
see him much, you know?
Later on, I suppose you didn't.

619
00:46:09.199 --> 00:46:14.440
I looked at the small pile of
grimy mess I'd recently freed from the glass

620
00:46:14.519 --> 00:46:16.679
surface. You all right in there, so I lasked, Yeah, I

621
00:46:16.760 --> 00:46:21.440
replied, listen, I should get
back to work. So I gave an

622
00:46:21.519 --> 00:46:24.679
understanding nod and removed himself from the
sill with a chuckle. Well, good

623
00:46:24.760 --> 00:46:28.920
meeting you. I hope you're sticking
around for a while. He gave wave

624
00:46:29.039 --> 00:46:30.960
and walked off to the side.
I stood there for a few moments,

625
00:46:31.039 --> 00:46:37.000
unaware of anything but the view through
the window and dancing light it cast into

626
00:46:37.039 --> 00:46:39.960
the room. I couldn't have even
told you if I was breathing, gathering

627
00:46:40.039 --> 00:46:45.119
my wits. I cautiously walked to
the window and picked it up off the

628
00:46:45.199 --> 00:46:49.679
floor into the closet. It went, Okay, so the guy's crazy or

629
00:46:49.800 --> 00:46:54.519
something. So the guy the window
was on the floor, so it was

630
00:46:54.559 --> 00:47:00.320
a floor person. Should I guess? I don't know. And it's bunchkin.

631
00:47:00.559 --> 00:47:06.559
So there's a lot of little living
under that little people father's home.

632
00:47:06.960 --> 00:47:10.679
That was interesting. These are dumb. A lot of creepy pastas are bad.

633
00:47:12.400 --> 00:47:16.199
Most of them are bad. The
ones that are good probably not even

634
00:47:16.280 --> 00:47:22.280
that good. There's like even like
collections of bad creepy pasta like at a

635
00:47:22.320 --> 00:47:27.400
certain point people started writing it badly
on purpose, and so it's got its

636
00:47:27.480 --> 00:47:30.199
own place. And there are a
lot of people that you can tell English

637
00:47:30.320 --> 00:47:35.519
is not their first language, or
these creepypastas have been run through some type

638
00:47:35.559 --> 00:47:39.519
of translator that is losing a lot
of stuff in translation, or just written

639
00:47:39.519 --> 00:47:46.039
in such haste and like and submit. No, not even rereading it.

640
00:47:46.719 --> 00:47:52.320
So Stephanie is going to do the
honors here reading this classic, Like I

641
00:47:52.400 --> 00:47:55.440
think this one was actually longer.
Yeah, it was actually longer, and

642
00:47:55.519 --> 00:48:01.280
it was engineered into even a shorter, bad creepy pasta. So this one's

643
00:48:01.320 --> 00:48:06.800
a classic. Stephanie's going to do
the honors. Okay. So I think

644
00:48:06.880 --> 00:48:10.000
this one can strike a nerve with
anybody. You're with your honey and you're

645
00:48:10.079 --> 00:48:15.199
making out. When the phone rings, you answer it, and the voices

646
00:48:15.559 --> 00:48:19.599
what are you doing with my daughter? You tell your girl and she say,

647
00:48:20.000 --> 00:48:24.159
my dad is dead? Then who
was phone? Then who was phoned?

648
00:48:24.320 --> 00:48:28.679
Then who then was phone? Yeah, this one's the classic. They

649
00:48:28.719 --> 00:48:31.880
didn't think this out. Um here's
the original version of This version is far

650
00:48:32.079 --> 00:48:37.599
less known, but apparently predates the
above version. Okay, so basically it's

651
00:48:37.679 --> 00:48:42.440
like this. You are at a
friend's house for like the night or whatever,

652
00:48:42.719 --> 00:48:45.840
and then you guys are making out
on the couch. Yeah, and

653
00:48:45.000 --> 00:48:50.400
then like her dad calls on the
phone and says, no, she likes

654
00:48:50.480 --> 00:48:53.760
it more if you use the other
hand. Yeah, and you're all like,

655
00:48:54.079 --> 00:48:58.519
oh, dude, your dad is
trying to give me advice on how

656
00:48:58.599 --> 00:49:01.079
to diddle you. And then She's
like, I don't have a dad or

657
00:49:01.159 --> 00:49:07.159
whatever, but what who was phone? So yeah, that was the unabridged

658
00:49:07.400 --> 00:49:12.280
version. Yeah, I did not
think the abridged version could possibly be better

659
00:49:12.360 --> 00:49:15.360
than anything, but I think it
was good to cut that down a little

660
00:49:15.360 --> 00:49:19.320
bit. You've got to read this
for yourself, Like there's so many misspellings

661
00:49:19.519 --> 00:49:23.360
and like you spelled with just the
letter you and dad is dead? Is

662
00:49:23.760 --> 00:49:28.960
dead? Is D E D.
So you're with your honey and you're making

663
00:49:29.079 --> 00:49:31.960
out when the phone rings, you
answer it in the voice is what are

664
00:49:32.039 --> 00:49:36.880
you doing with my daughter? You
tell your girl and she say, my

665
00:49:37.039 --> 00:49:42.000
dad is dead? Then who was
phone? It's a modern classic because that's

666
00:49:42.039 --> 00:49:46.480
really the big question in life,
was who was phone? These are I'm

667
00:49:46.519 --> 00:49:52.719
going to get into some. Like
I said, I've explained copy pasta links,

668
00:49:52.119 --> 00:49:55.239
so I mean you got the idea. Um, there's some that like

669
00:49:55.360 --> 00:50:00.599
I said, there's some that's just
they're just you know, regular already's copy

670
00:50:00.679 --> 00:50:02.880
and pasted or funny stuff like that. This one's one of my favorites.

671
00:50:02.960 --> 00:50:07.679
I've seen it plastered places before and
I got two of them. There about

672
00:50:07.760 --> 00:50:12.039
meeting celebrities, so like you can
interchange the names. If you want to

673
00:50:12.079 --> 00:50:15.840
do it for somebody else, But
this one's about wrestler Shawn Michael's and that's

674
00:50:15.880 --> 00:50:19.519
how it originally showed up. I
met Shawn Michael's at a restaurant once.

675
00:50:19.760 --> 00:50:23.480
We'd accidentally been given his table.
Apparently he was fond of the restaurant and

676
00:50:23.559 --> 00:50:28.760
had a specific table he liked,
and the management had messed up and gotten

677
00:50:28.800 --> 00:50:31.400
their days wrong. It was Tuesday
and they thought he was coming in Thursday

678
00:50:31.519 --> 00:50:36.239
or something like that. Anyway,
the manager, completely embarrassed, this is

679
00:50:36.239 --> 00:50:38.440
a pretty nice restaurant, comes by
and says, I'm so sorry, but

680
00:50:38.599 --> 00:50:43.679
we'd like to move you to another
table. If you could be troubled,

681
00:50:43.760 --> 00:50:46.599
then we'll gladly compensate you for the
cost of the mill and any other meal

682
00:50:46.840 --> 00:50:51.119
you'd like while you're in town.
My sister and cousin were both like,

683
00:50:51.280 --> 00:50:53.199
yeah, that's cool, and I
kind of played the asshole a bit.

684
00:50:53.400 --> 00:50:57.679
I'm sorry, I just don't understand. We've been here for fifteen minutes,

685
00:50:57.760 --> 00:51:00.360
we just ordered. Can't we finish
our meal? Year Then out of nowhere,

686
00:51:00.519 --> 00:51:05.159
Shaun Michael shows up next to the
management and says, Paul, these

687
00:51:05.239 --> 00:51:07.239
guys can finish. We'll be at
the bar. I got some time,

688
00:51:07.480 --> 00:51:10.880
and I, being a big HB
K fan, said, oh wow,

689
00:51:12.400 --> 00:51:15.960
I had no idea. Please feel
free to give them the table. Sean

690
00:51:15.119 --> 00:51:19.760
was grateful, shook my hand and
said thanks, then gave me a card

691
00:51:19.880 --> 00:51:22.760
with his number on it and told
me to give him a call later.

692
00:51:22.119 --> 00:51:25.280
After working up the nerve, I
gave him a call that night, and

693
00:51:25.400 --> 00:51:30.039
to make a long story short,
we had a glorious eleven month love affair

694
00:51:30.480 --> 00:51:37.519
man on man that I shall never
forget. Our body's intertwined as one and

695
00:51:37.679 --> 00:51:42.960
from the beauty of Morocco to the
French Riviera to the Snorkeling and the Glopcoast,

696
00:51:43.280 --> 00:51:46.840
Shawn Michaels and I made glorious gay
love to each other on six of

697
00:51:46.920 --> 00:51:51.719
the seven continents. Would this be? Is this what they call him?

698
00:51:51.760 --> 00:51:58.320
Meat? Cute? Yeah? To
meet cube like a little cube of meat.

699
00:51:58.400 --> 00:52:01.400
Because that's a heartwarming story. Oh
yeah, that's that was wonderful.

700
00:52:01.480 --> 00:52:06.880
Here's another one that's not. Yeah, I fill in the blank. You

701
00:52:06.960 --> 00:52:10.199
know, if you've got someone you'd
prefer to imagine in that scenario over Shawn

702
00:52:10.280 --> 00:52:15.039
Michael's just stick him in there and
have a nice little mental movie. Yeah,

703
00:52:15.159 --> 00:52:20.719
this one. This one is originally
saw it as Keanu Reeves, so

704
00:52:20.880 --> 00:52:23.480
that's how I'm going to read it. I saw Keanu Reeves at a grocery

705
00:52:23.519 --> 00:52:28.199
store in d C yesterday. I
told him how cool it was to meet

706
00:52:28.320 --> 00:52:30.400
him in person, but I didn't
want to be a douche and bother him

707
00:52:30.440 --> 00:52:35.000
and ask him for photos or anything. He said, oh, like you're

708
00:52:35.039 --> 00:52:37.800
doing now, and I was taking
it back, and all I could say

709
00:52:37.960 --> 00:52:40.000
was huh, but he kept cutting
me off and going huh, huh,

710
00:52:40.199 --> 00:52:45.639
huh and closing his hand shut in
front of my face. I walked away

711
00:52:46.320 --> 00:52:51.079
and continued with my shopping, and
I heard him chuckle as I walked off.

712
00:52:51.199 --> 00:52:53.079
When I came to pay for my
stuff up Bryant, I saw him

713
00:52:53.119 --> 00:52:58.519
trying to walk out of the doors
with like fifteen milky ways in his hands

714
00:52:58.639 --> 00:53:02.559
without paying. The girl at the
counter was very nice about it and professional

715
00:53:02.599 --> 00:53:06.360
and was like, sor, you
need to pay for those first. At

716
00:53:06.400 --> 00:53:09.239
first, he kept pretending to be
tired and not hear her, but eventually

717
00:53:09.400 --> 00:53:14.000
turned her back around and brought him
to the counter. Oh god, I'm

718
00:53:14.079 --> 00:53:20.400
so tired, so tired, he
just can't hear. When she took one

719
00:53:20.440 --> 00:53:24.039
of the bars and started scanning at
multiple times. He stopped her and told

720
00:53:24.039 --> 00:53:30.280
her to scan them each individually to
prevent any electrical inveterans, and then turned

721
00:53:30.320 --> 00:53:35.079
around and winked at me. I
don't even think that's a word. After

722
00:53:35.199 --> 00:53:37.840
she scanned each bar and put them
in a bag and started to say the

723
00:53:37.920 --> 00:53:46.719
price, he kept interrupting her by
yawning really loudly. After paying for the

724
00:53:46.840 --> 00:53:51.679
milky Way, he proceeded to leave
the store and throw all of them into

725
00:53:51.719 --> 00:53:58.159
the garbage. I haven't seen him
since ye's yesterday. I mean, you

726
00:53:58.239 --> 00:54:02.440
think you're going to just see him
every day time to day. Wow,

727
00:54:02.599 --> 00:54:07.280
that's magical. I like that.
Okay, this one I found in form

728
00:54:07.360 --> 00:54:12.079
of a green text on four Chan, So this one's a good one.

729
00:54:12.119 --> 00:54:15.679
It's all like a foreign language to
me. I don't know anything about Okay,

730
00:54:15.840 --> 00:54:19.559
fortune, I've explained what four chan
is. Don't go to four chan.

731
00:54:20.000 --> 00:54:22.559
It's a forum, but it's a
butthole of the Internet. You can

732
00:54:22.639 --> 00:54:28.440
find some gold, but like most
of its ship or sucking gore or porn,

733
00:54:28.599 --> 00:54:31.880
you're not supposed to look at or
porn. You just otherwise don't want

734
00:54:31.920 --> 00:54:37.159
to look at anyway. Let you
see this picture of this fellow sitting here

735
00:54:37.199 --> 00:54:40.079
and he's got a I guess the
system of a down shirt on. No,

736
00:54:40.320 --> 00:54:44.519
it's not. Just take a look
at him. Okay, Okay,

737
00:54:44.559 --> 00:54:47.840
he's just like this high school metal
guy sitting there, but he has a

738
00:54:49.000 --> 00:54:54.960
dinner part and it's all, yeah, that's all. He's got a ponytail

739
00:54:55.039 --> 00:54:58.719
though, so it's like, yeah, you can see us here in the

740
00:54:58.760 --> 00:55:02.360
back. Okay, but anyway,
that's like a yeah, none of it's

741
00:55:02.440 --> 00:55:07.920
relevant, but that's a picture that
was posted a huge metal fan in high

742
00:55:07.960 --> 00:55:13.079
school. Still math class. Nine
out of ten girls sits next to me.

743
00:55:13.760 --> 00:55:16.599
She's hot. Turns me on so
much. She doesn't notice me though,

744
00:55:16.800 --> 00:55:22.199
try really hard to impress her.
She's so hot. Teacher passing back

745
00:55:22.440 --> 00:55:25.519
last week's test. Nine out of
ten looks over at me, start smiling

746
00:55:25.719 --> 00:55:30.360
and playing with her hair. I'm
spinning. I can't handle it. Teach

747
00:55:30.400 --> 00:55:34.599
your trips over me. I break
down. I stopped spinning. Nine out

748
00:55:34.639 --> 00:55:37.480
of ten frowns, looks back at
the front of the room. I'm trying

749
00:55:37.840 --> 00:55:42.920
too hard to keep cool. I
have no power. Teacher plugs me back

750
00:55:43.000 --> 00:55:46.840
in, start spinning again. I'm
a huge metal fan, so it's a

751
00:55:46.920 --> 00:55:52.760
bait to switch. That's what he's
talking about, spinning, And yeah,

752
00:55:52.360 --> 00:55:57.440
I thought it was, you know, metaphorical, but then the teacher tripped

753
00:55:57.519 --> 00:56:00.159
over me and set me back up. But it's like, okay, this

754
00:56:00.360 --> 00:56:06.480
is okay, this one. This
one's fun. Girlfriend g F is prego.

755
00:56:06.880 --> 00:56:10.559
We like to get kinky. Anyways. One night, things get particularly

756
00:56:10.760 --> 00:56:17.119
saucy. I'm sticking my noodle in
her when I noticed notice weird fucking chunks

757
00:56:17.239 --> 00:56:22.880
coming out. So I turn on
the lights. Wtf, it's red everywhere

758
00:56:22.079 --> 00:56:25.880
and she's obviously not on her period. I'll look up at her. She's

759
00:56:25.920 --> 00:56:30.239
got a glassy jarred look on her
face and she's not answering. Oh,

760
00:56:30.360 --> 00:56:34.519
shaddo, shado, shadow shadow,
shadow Ship. I'll rush her into the

761
00:56:34.639 --> 00:56:38.119
car and speed all the way to
the hospital. She's still bleeding everywhere.

762
00:56:38.400 --> 00:56:42.519
By the time we get there,
she's not bleeding much more, but all

763
00:56:42.599 --> 00:56:46.239
color has drained and she looks colorless
and almost transparent. Oh ship, she

764
00:56:46.440 --> 00:56:52.079
looks like she's in a vegetative state. Storm into the emergency room, carry

765
00:56:52.159 --> 00:56:55.239
her to the nearest doctor and explain
everything. He takes one look at her

766
00:56:55.280 --> 00:56:59.440
and says, sir, I'm sorry, there's nothing we can do. Why

767
00:56:59.519 --> 00:57:04.559
the funk not? We don't operate
on empty jars of spaghetti sauce. My

768
00:57:04.719 --> 00:57:12.519
face went, okay, my girlfriend
is prego his girlfriend. That's yeah,

769
00:57:12.880 --> 00:57:15.320
all the whole thing. Yeah,
that's that's what a lot of those are

770
00:57:15.400 --> 00:57:22.119
like. Before we get out of
the whole spooky spaghetti part of it,

771
00:57:22.360 --> 00:57:27.079
I'm going to read two and they're
part of the same series. I'm not

772
00:57:27.079 --> 00:57:29.960
gonna tell you what they're called because
it will give away the first thing.

773
00:57:30.239 --> 00:57:35.679
You'll figure it out anyway. But
this one's fun alright. This is part

774
00:57:35.760 --> 00:57:37.760
one. One night, I had
a tough time falling asleep, so I

775
00:57:37.880 --> 00:57:42.559
decided to take a stroll through the
woods, and little did I know it

776
00:57:42.719 --> 00:57:45.840
was only the beginning of the nightmare
that is now in my life. It

777
00:57:45.960 --> 00:57:51.119
was around one am, abresque night, a Still not armed with my flashlight,

778
00:57:51.239 --> 00:57:54.079
I walked straight into the forest on
the outskirts of town. In hindsight,

779
00:57:54.159 --> 00:57:59.079
I should have noticed how quiet it
was, especially for being a forest

780
00:57:59.159 --> 00:58:02.199
in the summer. I should have
noticed the lack of any noise. There

781
00:58:02.280 --> 00:58:07.239
wasn't even a breeze. Suddenly there
was a sound of branches breaking, as

782
00:58:07.280 --> 00:58:10.519
if someone were tearing them straight off
the trees. A panic, thinking there

783
00:58:10.559 --> 00:58:15.239
could be a bear or some other
horrible creature ready to pounce. A little

784
00:58:15.320 --> 00:58:19.440
did I know, It's something so
much worse than that, something far worse.

785
00:58:19.719 --> 00:58:22.719
I stopped walking and I cocked my
head to the side, hoping to

786
00:58:22.840 --> 00:58:25.679
hear the sound of footsteps so I
would know which way to run if it

787
00:58:25.760 --> 00:58:30.239
came to that. Also picked up
a couple of loose stones from the ground,

788
00:58:30.519 --> 00:58:37.519
mostly just to calm my nerves.
Allowed woo obliterated the silence. It

789
00:58:37.679 --> 00:58:43.039
sounded as if Rick Flair had a
throat lubricated with bacon grease. I could

790
00:58:43.039 --> 00:58:46.079
almost smell the noise. I flipped
the switch on my flashlight to try and

791
00:58:46.239 --> 00:58:52.079
hide my location. Allowed thumping accompanied
the noise, and in the light of

792
00:58:52.199 --> 00:58:54.800
the full moon, I saw a
human shape come around a tree in front

793
00:58:54.840 --> 00:58:59.719
of me. It was about fifteen
feet away and nearly six feet in hot

794
00:59:00.039 --> 00:59:02.639
I heard a loud sniffing sound and
I could see the outlines of its head

795
00:59:02.800 --> 00:59:07.039
turned my way. It started coming
closer, and I started fill adrenaline pump

796
00:59:07.079 --> 00:59:10.880
into my system. I turned tail
and ran. I was spurning as fast

797
00:59:10.960 --> 00:59:15.519
as I could, and this guy
was easily keeping pace with me. I

798
00:59:15.679 --> 00:59:19.679
tripped and rolled onto my back,
knowing that in only a few moments my

799
00:59:19.840 --> 00:59:22.639
life would be over. As a
last ditch effort, I decided to turn

800
00:59:22.760 --> 00:59:28.039
my lot back on and maybe blind
to my pursuer, I waved the flashlight

801
00:59:28.119 --> 00:59:31.559
around wildly, hoping to catch his
eyes, and the light large black eyes

802
00:59:31.719 --> 00:59:36.519
reflected back, and I nearly peed
my pants, thinking for a moment that

803
00:59:36.639 --> 00:59:40.400
I was looking at some extraterrestrial being. Once I took a moment, though,

804
00:59:40.559 --> 00:59:45.039
I realized that it was sunglasses.
Who would wear sunglasses while in the

805
00:59:45.159 --> 00:59:50.039
forest at two am? Why would
anyone do that? I took in the

806
00:59:50.119 --> 00:59:53.559
rest of this guy's outfit, track
pants, snakeskin boots, and a bright

807
00:59:53.800 --> 00:59:59.840
green bowler shirt with an embroidered flames
rising up from the bottom. The shirt

808
01:00:00.079 --> 01:00:04.440
was also streaked with some dark liquid
that I couldn't identify. I raised the

809
01:00:04.519 --> 01:00:07.239
light back up to the man's head. He had a black goatee with a

810
01:00:07.320 --> 01:00:12.639
bleach streak down the middle like a
racing stripe, and bleached spiky hair on

811
01:00:12.800 --> 01:00:15.679
top of his head. He looked
weirdly familiar, like I had seen him

812
01:00:15.760 --> 01:00:20.920
somewhere before, and maybe at the
local race track. Maybe he had passed

813
01:00:21.000 --> 01:00:23.519
in the street or something. I
couldn't place him. He started to giggle

814
01:00:23.920 --> 01:00:29.039
as he approached me and opened his
mouth without moving his lips. I heard

815
01:00:29.119 --> 01:00:32.840
this sentence emanate from him. You're
taking the gobble full throttle. He charged

816
01:00:32.960 --> 01:00:37.559
after that, Still laying prone on
the ground, there was little defense as

817
01:00:37.599 --> 01:00:40.960
he belly flopped on top of me
like an inept diver. The wind was

818
01:00:42.280 --> 01:00:45.039
very nearly knocked out of me,
and he tried to pin me down.

819
01:00:45.280 --> 01:00:47.960
I grabbed ahold of his arms and
realized that they were also covered with the

820
01:00:49.079 --> 01:00:52.880
same dark liquid that was on his
shirt. It was barbecue sauce. I

821
01:00:52.000 --> 01:00:57.880
screamed, and he yelled the sauce
is money, and with a sudden movement,

822
01:00:58.079 --> 01:01:00.679
bit deep into my shoulder, wearing
a chunk out of my muscle.

823
01:01:01.000 --> 01:01:06.119
He twisted his head from side to
side like an alligator and pulled his head

824
01:01:06.159 --> 01:01:09.320
back. He swallowed my flesh.
As I laid there sobbing, knowing that

825
01:01:09.480 --> 01:01:13.840
my life was over, I could
fill the life blood pumping out of my

826
01:01:13.920 --> 01:01:17.000
shoulder with each beat of my heart. He made a smacking sound with his

827
01:01:17.119 --> 01:01:21.400
lips and said, I could put
this on a flip flop and it would

828
01:01:21.440 --> 01:01:25.599
taste good. He He then climbed
off of me and flipped his sunglasses to

829
01:01:25.719 --> 01:01:29.880
the back of his head. I
had a moment of clarity and realized this

830
01:01:30.000 --> 01:01:35.519
man, this monster, was Garfietti. He looked at me dead in the

831
01:01:35.559 --> 01:01:38.199
eye and said, now that you
bear my mark, you should walk the

832
01:01:38.280 --> 01:01:44.440
earth all eternity. You will hunt
diners, drive ins and dives until the

833
01:01:44.519 --> 01:01:47.400
sun burns out and no life is
left on this planet. I'm driving the

834
01:01:47.440 --> 01:01:52.440
bust of Flavortown and you're coming along
for the ride. Love, peace and

835
01:01:52.519 --> 01:01:57.480
taco grease. And with that he
let a long, bubbling sigh. His

836
01:01:57.639 --> 01:02:00.760
body started to shake and convulse,
and I noticed that his skin and clothes

837
01:02:00.880 --> 01:02:06.719
were slothing off, falling in chunks
to the forest floor, where it started

838
01:02:06.760 --> 01:02:10.159
to sink into the dirt. Soon
only a skeleton remained, and that too

839
01:02:10.239 --> 01:02:15.199
crumbled away. I forgot all about
my shoulder as a new and horrible agony

840
01:02:15.440 --> 01:02:20.960
racked my body, causing me to
twist onto my side and curl into the

841
01:02:21.039 --> 01:02:24.639
fetal position. I puked uncontrollably and
shook. It felt as though my skin

842
01:02:24.840 --> 01:02:30.199
was splitting. The dropped flashlight illuminated
my body. As I looked down and

843
01:02:30.280 --> 01:02:34.239
saw that I was correct. Huge
splits were running down my arms, and

844
01:02:34.320 --> 01:02:37.400
it felt like the same could be
happening on my legs. The splits,

845
01:02:37.440 --> 01:02:40.679
I could see something brightly yellow,
but I couldn't make it out. The

846
01:02:40.880 --> 01:02:45.119
fresh wave of pain hit me.
My head seemed to stretch and bulge as

847
01:02:45.239 --> 01:02:49.079
something forced itself out of the back
of my neck. I was on the

848
01:02:49.119 --> 01:02:52.360
ground screaming for what seemed like hours. At some point I blacked out.

849
01:02:53.039 --> 01:02:58.239
I awoke and realized that my voice
had completely been destroyed from the screaming,

850
01:02:58.320 --> 01:03:01.800
but I also realized the pain had
started to subside. I looked around and

851
01:03:01.880 --> 01:03:06.679
saw my skin and clothes littering the
ground around me, as if I had

852
01:03:06.800 --> 01:03:10.239
cast them off. I felt my
face and realized I had grown a goatee

853
01:03:10.360 --> 01:03:15.360
and sunglasses. We're now sitting on
the back of my head snugly. I

854
01:03:15.480 --> 01:03:20.119
stared down at my arms and saw
tattoos that were never there before. Framing

855
01:03:20.199 --> 01:03:24.119
my arms was a yellow short sleeve
shirt with flames printed on the sleeves and

856
01:03:24.360 --> 01:03:29.000
bottom. It hit me like a
ton of bricks. My worst nightmare had

857
01:03:29.079 --> 01:03:32.800
come true. I was gar Fietti. Now you like that one. It

858
01:03:32.960 --> 01:03:38.559
was a weird guy. I don't
know. Gar Fietti is given a lot

859
01:03:38.639 --> 01:03:43.280
of ship. But he's, like
I've heard, a really great guy.

860
01:03:44.039 --> 01:03:47.840
No cap he no cat, no
cat dog. He's like a really good

861
01:03:47.880 --> 01:03:53.559
guy. But like he just I
don't know, dresses. Unfortunately, he's

862
01:03:53.599 --> 01:03:57.639
just a little over the top,
you know. He just he does what

863
01:03:57.800 --> 01:04:02.400
makes them happy. And anybody who
isn't cool with that, he ain't hurting

864
01:04:02.440 --> 01:04:05.599
nobody. Now. Of course,
if he ever gets me too it or

865
01:04:05.719 --> 01:04:10.079
something like that, then yeah,
we'll have to come back and say we

866
01:04:10.159 --> 01:04:13.920
didn't know a guy was a piece
of ship. We didn't know long When

867
01:04:13.920 --> 01:04:15.440
I say most people are a piece
of ship. But if I say somebody

868
01:04:15.480 --> 01:04:18.599
is a pretty decent guy, that's
pretty high praise. It really is.

869
01:04:19.239 --> 01:04:23.880
It means a lot, because yeah, pretty much everybody else is a piece

870
01:04:23.880 --> 01:04:29.119
of ship to you. Okay,
well there's a sequel. This is my

871
01:04:29.280 --> 01:04:32.679
curse, my flavor Town to Flavor
Bound. I sat on the floor of

872
01:04:32.800 --> 01:04:38.119
my kitchen in a circle of candles, wreathed in the shifting, flickering a

873
01:04:38.199 --> 01:04:43.280
lot. I was working on opening
the device. It was triangular in shape

874
01:04:43.599 --> 01:04:46.039
and made of wood or metal.
It was tough to say. The puzzle

875
01:04:46.199 --> 01:04:51.320
had what appeared to be representations of
pepperoni and cheese on it. Somehow I

876
01:04:51.400 --> 01:04:56.440
had to reconfigure this into a piece
of slice, and I wanted to open

877
01:04:56.760 --> 01:05:00.760
the portal to flavor Town. Hours
passed. I was making progress, twisting

878
01:05:00.800 --> 01:05:05.599
a pepperoni here and realigning some cheese
there. I moved my fingers along the

879
01:05:05.679 --> 01:05:10.559
crust, and almost imperceptibly, I
felt to click. I knew I was

880
01:05:10.599 --> 01:05:15.320
almost there. I spun the crust
around, and suddenly I heard this tolling

881
01:05:15.639 --> 01:05:21.039
of distant bells taco bells, and
a glowing, almost kneon blue light starting

882
01:05:21.079 --> 01:05:26.159
to pour in from nearly every crack
and seam in the room. I heard

883
01:05:26.199 --> 01:05:30.519
the cans of mountain dew and my
fridge explode. The various bags of chips

884
01:05:30.639 --> 01:05:34.880
and other junk food started throbbing and
pulsing. They two eventually burst open.

885
01:05:35.320 --> 01:05:40.679
I turned to my right and suddenly
there was an open doorway where just seconds

886
01:05:40.719 --> 01:05:44.719
ago there was a blank wall.
Fog filled it, and it was lit

887
01:05:44.920 --> 01:05:47.960
by the same blue light. I
couldn't make out anything past the entrance,

888
01:05:48.079 --> 01:05:54.280
but I knew this was my ticket
to Flavortown. A man's size shape formed

889
01:05:54.360 --> 01:05:57.960
in the fog that I could barely
make out. It started to approach me

890
01:05:58.079 --> 01:06:01.559
and eventually stepped into the kitchen.
The stories were true. The pizza puzzle

891
01:06:01.719 --> 01:06:05.519
had been solved, and the mayor
of Flavortown, himself, Guy Fietti,

892
01:06:05.840 --> 01:06:11.599
was now in my house. He
looked different. He wasn't wearing the bowling

893
01:06:11.679 --> 01:06:15.960
shirt. Instead, he had on
some kind of latex and leather contraption that

894
01:06:15.119 --> 01:06:18.719
did not fit him in the least. He was pouring out that fit his

895
01:06:18.840 --> 01:06:25.039
blubber, bursting through small square holes. It almost looked like the holes were

896
01:06:25.159 --> 01:06:29.480
purposely tightened around the flesh, as
blood leaked from them, and the skin

897
01:06:29.719 --> 01:06:33.960
was blackened as if dead. He
had his trademark sunglasses on and the same

898
01:06:34.079 --> 01:06:40.440
hair, but his overall skin tone
was now bluish gray. He had spatulas

899
01:06:40.559 --> 01:06:45.519
and other cooking implements tied around his
considerable waist. What are you, I

900
01:06:45.679 --> 01:06:50.039
asked, and explorer in the further
regions of taste, a demon to some

901
01:06:50.599 --> 01:06:55.480
angel to others. He took a
step towards me and extended his hand.

902
01:06:55.960 --> 01:07:00.639
Come you solved the slice, You
must come with me and taste pleasures.

903
01:07:00.960 --> 01:07:04.079
I declined to take his hand,
but I followed him nonetheless. We walked

904
01:07:04.159 --> 01:07:12.239
for what seemed like eons through labyrinthine
corridors. My sense of smell was being

905
01:07:12.440 --> 01:07:16.880
constantly assaulted by new and varied sense, some amazing, some so bad I

906
01:07:16.920 --> 01:07:21.800
couldn't even imagine what they could be. Coming from the corridor finally opened up

907
01:07:21.840 --> 01:07:27.880
into a wide plateau. Above everything, there was a gigantic, floating burrito.

908
01:07:28.400 --> 01:07:32.239
It wasn't possibly large, and could
be the origin of the various food

909
01:07:32.320 --> 01:07:36.920
smells. Flavor Town seemed like it
would be a lot nicer than this.

910
01:07:38.159 --> 01:07:43.159
When I heard the stories, the
burrito let out a loud blast of sound,

911
01:07:43.239 --> 01:07:47.280
almost like some kind of foghorn.
My mind could barely comprehend what I

912
01:07:47.400 --> 01:07:53.000
was seeing. Oh my God,
I muttered, No, this is mine,

913
01:07:53.400 --> 01:07:56.519
the god I serve in this world, and yours, the God of

914
01:07:56.639 --> 01:08:01.960
flavor, Hunger and Greece, my
God. Breathe on, Lord of Flavortown.

915
01:08:02.480 --> 01:08:08.239
I gasped for air. The stench
of this massive, shifting burrito was

916
01:08:08.280 --> 01:08:13.000
starting to overpower me, starting to
make me have flashbacks of meals past.

917
01:08:13.480 --> 01:08:16.279
This is what you wanted, this
is what you wanted to taste to smell.

918
01:08:16.800 --> 01:08:20.960
You wanted a one way ticket to
Flavortown, and now you have one.

919
01:08:21.399 --> 01:08:26.760
Guy shouted and chuckled behind me.
I heard a noise like greased up

920
01:08:26.840 --> 01:08:30.279
ball bearings moving a slab of wood. Guy took a step towards me and

921
01:08:30.359 --> 01:08:34.880
declared, my God wants someone to
taste what it's created, and I brought

922
01:08:35.039 --> 01:08:40.319
you. He shoved me hard in
the chest and I fell back, immediately

923
01:08:40.520 --> 01:08:44.600
landing and what appeared to be an
open, upright coffin of some kind.

924
01:08:45.199 --> 01:08:48.720
Something restrained my arms and legs.
I had a split second to look down

925
01:08:48.840 --> 01:08:55.039
and saw oversized forks and spoons holding
me in place. A sharp, stabbing

926
01:08:55.199 --> 01:08:59.119
pain erupted from my side, and
I saw a tube full of what looked

927
01:08:59.119 --> 01:09:03.079
like crisco when paling my side,
pumping me full of the substance. More

928
01:09:03.199 --> 01:09:08.640
spoons and forks held my head in
place with my mouth open. An arm

929
01:09:08.960 --> 01:09:12.840
made of what looked to be sausage
and bacon dropped down in front of my

930
01:09:13.000 --> 01:09:16.680
face, jamming itself down my throat. I couldn't breathe. The smells and

931
01:09:16.800 --> 01:09:21.680
pain were overwhelming. I blacked out. I woke being held at a forty

932
01:09:21.760 --> 01:09:27.640
five degree angle, still restrained.
Although now with my head free to look

933
01:09:27.680 --> 01:09:30.399
around for all the good that did
me, the room was nearly pitch.

934
01:09:30.479 --> 01:09:35.560
Black guy approached me with a grin
plastered on his cold face. He removed

935
01:09:35.640 --> 01:09:40.880
his sunglasses and I saw that his
eyes were sowing shut. I gave a

936
01:09:40.960 --> 01:09:44.239
a lot to come what I am
now the side is meaningless to me,

937
01:09:44.399 --> 01:09:46.680
so I cast it off. It's
all about that taste. Brother. I'm

938
01:09:46.720 --> 01:09:51.000
gonna show you the light, and
then you're gonna join my culinary cabal.

939
01:09:51.439 --> 01:09:55.840
I'm about to knock your socks off
with this fresh take on a classic.

940
01:09:56.000 --> 01:09:58.840
When I put this in your mouth, you're gonna feel like an a t

941
01:09:59.159 --> 01:10:03.800
M. Because this is money.
He stepped out of view and returned with

942
01:10:03.920 --> 01:10:09.119
a wheeled table, not unlike those
you would see a cauld diver on and

943
01:10:09.239 --> 01:10:13.720
amord. It was covered in macaroni
and cheese. He took a large spoon

944
01:10:14.079 --> 01:10:17.319
off his belt and thrust it into
the heaping mound, then turned to me

945
01:10:17.720 --> 01:10:23.840
and shoved it into my mouth with
a dispassionate look. The spoon shattered one

946
01:10:23.880 --> 01:10:27.920
of my teeth. He loudly shouted, chit ching through the blood and the

947
01:10:28.119 --> 01:10:31.479
enamel. I could taste the cheesy
mass. My sanity must have started to

948
01:10:31.560 --> 01:10:35.840
slip, because it really did taste
good. After I swallowed, he filled

949
01:10:35.880 --> 01:10:42.279
my mouth again immediately. This time
it tasted slightly different better. Somehow there

950
01:10:42.399 --> 01:10:45.000
was a hint to something that I
couldn't quite place. I chewed more and

951
01:10:45.119 --> 01:10:49.000
realized that it was bacon. I
looked at God and he grinned again.

952
01:10:49.399 --> 01:10:53.359
You taste that bacon, yet it
really kicks it up a notch. Huh.

953
01:10:53.640 --> 01:10:57.760
He started making sucking sounds with his
mouth, then smacked his lips,

954
01:10:57.960 --> 01:11:00.560
belched, and ate some more of
the mac and cheese himself. That bacon

955
01:11:00.760 --> 01:11:04.039
is made of long pig, if
you know what I'm saying. I looked

956
01:11:04.079 --> 01:11:08.880
down and saw that strips of flesh
were cut from my torso and legs.

957
01:11:09.359 --> 01:11:13.880
This and many more horrors were to
be my fate for all eternity. It

958
01:11:14.000 --> 01:11:17.399
looks like I got myself into nothing
but trouble. So you're there, you

959
01:11:17.479 --> 01:11:25.000
go, there's the flavor town nothing
but trouble. Why it's because it's a

960
01:11:25.119 --> 01:11:31.920
nothing but trouble reference. I believe
this. That's it for the pastas.

961
01:11:32.439 --> 01:11:36.439
I think I've had it enough time
with just pastas alone. What I want

962
01:11:36.479 --> 01:11:43.479
to discuss was Halloween ends. Yes, so this has just come out.

963
01:11:43.560 --> 01:11:46.640
We watched it on Peacock. I
didn't go to the theater watch this.

964
01:11:47.239 --> 01:11:56.039
This is probably one of the most
disappointing movies I've ever seen. I mean,

965
01:11:56.119 --> 01:12:00.039
you've heard me bitch about movies and
remakes and stuff like that. I

966
01:12:00.159 --> 01:12:05.279
got really idiotically piste off at the
Pet Cemetery remake that's documented here. Within

967
01:12:05.399 --> 01:12:11.039
the confines of this podcast. You
will find somewhere where I was bitching about

968
01:12:11.079 --> 01:12:15.920
Pet Cemetery. But this movie where
to start. I wouldn't call it disappointing,

969
01:12:15.600 --> 01:12:19.640
it just was. It was shockingly
bad. It was like supposed to

970
01:12:19.760 --> 01:12:26.039
be a big box office hit and
it was like the worst c movie plot

971
01:12:26.640 --> 01:12:31.680
and unrelatable characters and just well,
I guess we should preface this by saying

972
01:12:31.800 --> 01:12:38.720
that the characters are written unlike how
real humans behave, like their behavior and

973
01:12:39.319 --> 01:12:45.600
how they talk is people don't talk
like that. AI wrote a script trying

974
01:12:45.680 --> 01:12:50.560
to say how humans. It's like
a cold machine that didn't really know how

975
01:12:50.720 --> 01:12:57.079
humans work. Wrote this fucking movie
that's supposed to be the end of the

976
01:12:57.199 --> 01:13:01.199
Michael Myers story. The Michael Myers
Laurie Strode to art as it were,

977
01:13:01.399 --> 01:13:05.920
that's been around since seventy eight,
and this is the big end all be

978
01:13:06.119 --> 01:13:10.760
all, so like, we got
these characters that don't act like real people.

979
01:13:11.039 --> 01:13:14.560
Nobody in the world acts like a
real person. One thing would like,

980
01:13:14.640 --> 01:13:16.520
I'm going to point out some of
the good things me and you both

981
01:13:16.600 --> 01:13:23.800
like the opening credits with the jack
O lantern graphic that kept morphin. I

982
01:13:23.880 --> 01:13:29.680
could watch that all fucking day.
Those Jack Landern's turning. That was very

983
01:13:29.720 --> 01:13:31.720
good. If you if you don't
watch anything else from the movie, should

984
01:13:31.760 --> 01:13:35.520
just go feeling real good and real
mellow. It was something that would have

985
01:13:35.600 --> 01:13:40.359
held my attention for a long time
if I was on mushrooms or something like

986
01:13:40.600 --> 01:13:44.159
that. It's just neat to watch. The movie starts and of course you

987
01:13:44.239 --> 01:13:47.600
got this guy, fucking guy who
you don't know. It's going to be

988
01:13:48.199 --> 01:13:53.199
the focal point of most of the
movie. It starts with a babysitter.

989
01:13:53.479 --> 01:13:56.720
Yeah, you know, of course, in a in a babysitting situation.

990
01:13:57.199 --> 01:14:02.039
The kid's a little cunt god and
a little ship the ship head like the

991
01:14:02.119 --> 01:14:05.319
mother is real strict no horror movies, blah blah blah blah blah, but

992
01:14:05.479 --> 01:14:10.680
like this dude lets him. Let's
kid watch horror movies. Yes, but

993
01:14:11.319 --> 01:14:15.159
because she's trying to be cool.
Yeah, but this is all happening.

994
01:14:15.600 --> 01:14:19.800
How many years had it been since
Michael terrorized the town? Not that many

995
01:14:19.920 --> 01:14:24.920
years, like four years. If
you've seen Halloween Kills, where everybody runs

996
01:14:25.079 --> 01:14:30.760
neck long at Michael at his knife, basically a woman shoots herself accidentally in

997
01:14:30.840 --> 01:14:35.960
the movie. It's just ridiculous,
wild bullshit. But anyway, Michael gets

998
01:14:36.039 --> 01:14:40.760
away in the end after been like
pumped full. So this is just like

999
01:14:40.960 --> 01:14:46.520
four years later. The way people
are acting, this crazy maniac serial killer

1000
01:14:46.680 --> 01:14:53.399
is on the loose for four years, he's always terrorized this one specific town.

1001
01:14:54.479 --> 01:14:59.840
And there's some revisionist history going on
big time because people think that like

1002
01:15:00.079 --> 01:15:05.600
Laurie Strode abused this mentally ill dude
into like going on. People are very

1003
01:15:05.880 --> 01:15:13.399
very harsh on Laurie. My sister's
in a wheelchair because you teased and wanted

1004
01:15:13.520 --> 01:15:17.439
this mentally ill man in this incarnation. They're not brother and sister. They

1005
01:15:18.000 --> 01:15:24.279
reckon that canon anymore. So,
like this crazy person who she had never

1006
01:15:24.600 --> 01:15:28.199
met, just showed up in town. It was just because she was there.

1007
01:15:28.720 --> 01:15:32.520
There was no connection whatsoever. But
people are blaming her. The town

1008
01:15:32.680 --> 01:15:38.800
hates Lorie Strode for her bringing him. He came back because of her.

1009
01:15:39.359 --> 01:15:43.760
They hate her because he comes to
town wanting to kill her, and there's

1010
01:15:43.880 --> 01:15:47.640
collateral damage. She should obviously just
sacrifice herself and then he would leave everyone

1011
01:15:47.680 --> 01:15:51.319
else alone. That's how every person
in this town acts. Well anyway,

1012
01:15:51.399 --> 01:15:58.880
that the babysitter kid, the teenager
he's babysitting the shitty child, locks him

1013
01:15:58.920 --> 01:16:02.520
in the some kind a closet or
it's a he's not a teenager, he's

1014
01:16:02.560 --> 01:16:05.439
like twenty one. He's a college
student, I think it said. But

1015
01:16:05.560 --> 01:16:10.720
yeah, the babysitter thinks the kid
escape. The front door is open,

1016
01:16:11.239 --> 01:16:14.760
and he doesn't find him outside.
He goes inside. He looks for him

1017
01:16:14.800 --> 01:16:16.760
everywhere. The last place he looks
as the attic. And while he's in

1018
01:16:16.800 --> 01:16:20.439
there looking for the kid, the
kid locks him in the attic and like,

1019
01:16:20.640 --> 01:16:24.920
and you know, there's a brady
punky ship kid, And he says

1020
01:16:25.039 --> 01:16:28.079
something like, I mean, this
dude's trying to be cool and letting him

1021
01:16:28.119 --> 01:16:31.199
watch four movies even though his mom
said no. And the kid says something

1022
01:16:31.239 --> 01:16:35.600
like, I'm not trying to be
friends. With the lame old boy babysitter

1023
01:16:35.760 --> 01:16:40.960
or some ship like that. So
he runs off and he gets locked the

1024
01:16:41.479 --> 01:16:45.680
dude dude's named Corey, lose named
Corey. He gets locked in that attic

1025
01:16:45.840 --> 01:16:49.319
and the kids like, oh,
Michael Myers is still out there, and

1026
01:16:49.359 --> 01:16:54.720
the dude's getting real scared in there. And finally he kicks the door open,

1027
01:16:54.880 --> 01:16:59.479
the kids standing round beside it.
He goes over the banister and like

1028
01:17:00.039 --> 01:17:06.279
it falls so violently as the parts
un This is like a huge four story

1029
01:17:06.359 --> 01:17:12.399
house. So he flew, Yeah, he fell with all the force in

1030
01:17:12.520 --> 01:17:15.680
the universe on his neck. Anyway, there's like a trial and all that.

1031
01:17:15.960 --> 01:17:18.600
I think Corey had to go to
prison for a little bit or something

1032
01:17:18.600 --> 01:17:23.960
because it was just accidental. He
wasn't punished that much, but he didn't.

1033
01:17:24.000 --> 01:17:26.239
He didn't get a murder charge.
I think he was in jail,

1034
01:17:26.399 --> 01:17:30.199
probably awaiting trial or something. Yeah, he probably did some county time.

1035
01:17:30.520 --> 01:17:35.960
This is where everything goes that opening
seems like, and this is where it

1036
01:17:36.000 --> 01:17:40.920
all goes to Corey. You know, he's being the cool babysitter. He

1037
01:17:41.000 --> 01:17:44.359
goes to the fridge, he grabs
a beer out of the fridge, looks

1038
01:17:44.399 --> 01:17:47.119
at it, and then he puts
it back and get the chocolate because he's

1039
01:17:47.199 --> 01:17:53.560
good. He's a wholesome. Yeah
person he's working for I guess his stepdad

1040
01:17:53.680 --> 01:17:56.920
as a mechanic. He's like in
theyre using a cut and torch and all

1041
01:17:57.000 --> 01:18:00.119
that, and like the step dad
gives him this shit, the old motorcycle

1042
01:18:00.199 --> 01:18:02.960
he found so he can get around
because this guy rides a bike, a

1043
01:18:03.039 --> 01:18:11.880
bicycle everywhere and anyway. These fucking
marching band kids bully this guy. He's

1044
01:18:11.880 --> 01:18:17.520
an adult male and marching band kids
from high school are bullying him, trying

1045
01:18:17.560 --> 01:18:21.199
to get him to bomb some beer. He won't. They push him down

1046
01:18:21.399 --> 01:18:26.039
and break his chocolate milk. He
falls down on it, cuts his hand.

1047
01:18:26.199 --> 01:18:30.720
All this, and then Laurie Strode
shows up, knows who he is,

1048
01:18:30.960 --> 01:18:33.239
and comes to his aid, and
she tells him, you want to

1049
01:18:33.279 --> 01:18:36.399
do this, you want me to, and he gives him a switchblade to

1050
01:18:36.520 --> 01:18:42.199
let go cut the band kids tires, which he does. And then like

1051
01:18:42.520 --> 01:18:49.119
she brings this stranger basically who was
involved in a shady accidental death to the

1052
01:18:49.279 --> 01:18:55.279
clinic just to meet her granddaughter,
which she's trying to hook this guy.

1053
01:18:55.439 --> 01:18:59.399
I mean, he needed stitches because
he landed on that glass bottle, and

1054
01:18:59.720 --> 01:19:01.760
so he needed to go to the
clinic. He needed to, but she

1055
01:19:01.920 --> 01:19:06.479
takes them specifically. She was like, me, my granddaughter, What a

1056
01:19:06.560 --> 01:19:13.000
coincidence that you're single and she's single? Like it was very cringe e.

1057
01:19:13.479 --> 01:19:17.399
Yeah, it's like, what's happening
here? Not super realistic human behavior?

1058
01:19:17.840 --> 01:19:21.359
Right. So anyway, these two
just hang out for a little bit,

1059
01:19:21.520 --> 01:19:28.960
so like they're in fucking everlasting internal
love five minutes of movie time later,

1060
01:19:29.960 --> 01:19:33.439
internal love, yeah, or something
like that. She takes him to this

1061
01:19:33.680 --> 01:19:38.159
Halloween party and he's hanging out having
a good time. He cuts loose,

1062
01:19:38.239 --> 01:19:43.239
he gets drunk, he's dancing,
he's doing some serious Kevin Bacon foot loose,

1063
01:19:43.359 --> 01:19:46.000
spinning on his back on the Yeah, he's lying on the floor in

1064
01:19:46.079 --> 01:19:53.640
this club. He's idiot drunk.
Anyway, she goes to piss and he

1065
01:19:53.760 --> 01:19:58.079
goes to the bar and like the
mother of the kid that he was babysitting

1066
01:19:58.119 --> 01:20:00.800
that died us there and she's like, well, it's not see you out

1067
01:20:00.880 --> 01:20:04.560
having a good time even though you
know, because you can't go out and

1068
01:20:04.640 --> 01:20:09.199
have a good time for the rest
of your life if somebody's shitty kid does

1069
01:20:09.279 --> 01:20:12.520
in your presence. And obviously this
is a few days before Halloween, but

1070
01:20:12.680 --> 01:20:17.199
I feel ninety eight percent confident that
she is wearing the same flapper costume that

1071
01:20:17.359 --> 01:20:21.800
she was wearing the Halloween nights.
Everything's almost the same. It's like she

1072
01:20:23.000 --> 01:20:26.960
was there for like thirty minutes into
both their scenes in the same outfit.

1073
01:20:27.079 --> 01:20:30.840
He gets all upset about that because
she's mean to him, and like,

1074
01:20:30.079 --> 01:20:34.920
finally Laurie Strude's granddaughter comes back from
the pisser and he's like, you left

1075
01:20:35.039 --> 01:20:40.760
me there alone, and he's like
all distraught and leaves her. She is,

1076
01:20:40.840 --> 01:20:45.479
of course distraught. She is two
tears because like these people have known

1077
01:20:45.560 --> 01:20:48.159
each other for all the fucking two
days, and she's just so upset.

1078
01:20:48.359 --> 01:20:51.199
I don't know how hard is it
to meet a man, even if you're

1079
01:20:51.279 --> 01:20:56.520
Laurie Strude's granddaughter. I mean,
she is crying her eyes out. He

1080
01:20:56.760 --> 01:21:00.479
is so indignant, and just you
know, you be in there and people

1081
01:21:00.560 --> 01:21:04.359
are why I don't go out in
public anymore? And I trusted you and

1082
01:21:04.800 --> 01:21:08.720
you let me down, And it's
like Jesus Christ, you went to the

1083
01:21:08.760 --> 01:21:13.479
back. This dude's mother is very
overbearing. He seems like he would have

1084
01:21:13.520 --> 01:21:16.640
been in trouble anyway, because she's
like a serial killer's mother. Yeah,

1085
01:21:16.840 --> 01:21:24.680
she is like your stereotypical serial killer
mother that is just overbearing and nagging and

1086
01:21:25.000 --> 01:21:30.279
constant just yelling and and like,
you know, way overprotective. What I

1087
01:21:30.359 --> 01:21:33.399
mean, I don't know who the
dude's had some has hang ups in his

1088
01:21:33.520 --> 01:21:40.159
lap. So so she's Lloyd Stroude's
granddaughter is so distraught and crying over Corey

1089
01:21:40.319 --> 01:21:45.600
leaving. Anyway, Corey is walking
down the highway marching band geeks catch up

1090
01:21:45.680 --> 01:21:48.439
with him, and you got a
picture these kids. You've got two guys

1091
01:21:48.680 --> 01:21:53.079
and two girls. I assume,
I don't know. I never caught their

1092
01:21:53.119 --> 01:21:57.600
pronouns. But the one leader guy, he looks a little bit preppy.

1093
01:21:58.039 --> 01:22:02.039
The other guy has like a mullet, like what's that band? That chicken

1094
01:22:02.760 --> 01:22:18.079
in that South African band? Right, yeah, look that chick up.

1095
01:22:19.680 --> 01:22:25.960
Yeah, so he's got that haircut
going on, and he twirls a drumstick

1096
01:22:26.000 --> 01:22:30.039
all the time because he's a real
bad motherfucker. And then you've got one

1097
01:22:30.199 --> 01:22:33.079
girl that's constantly oh my gosh,
you guys, this is a bad idea,

1098
01:22:33.199 --> 01:22:36.600
but then she still does goes along
with it anyway. But this is

1099
01:22:36.640 --> 01:22:41.279
so bad. You guys are so
yeah, you're so mean. I'm going

1100
01:22:41.319 --> 01:22:45.960
to stay with you and being complicit
in this. Anyhow, there's a scuffle

1101
01:22:46.119 --> 01:22:50.960
and the leader of the gang throws
him off the overpast, like on purpose.

1102
01:22:51.279 --> 01:22:56.079
Yes, the leader of the mean
marching band, the marching band gang

1103
01:22:56.840 --> 01:22:59.880
and you know the one. Girls
like, oh my god, I can't

1104
01:23:00.039 --> 01:23:01.239
did you do that? And he's
like, I don't know what you're talking

1105
01:23:01.279 --> 01:23:09.840
about. He fell, But anyway, he's down there and he gets he

1106
01:23:09.960 --> 01:23:15.560
wakes up and there's a homeless man
down there under the overpass who was deranged.

1107
01:23:15.920 --> 01:23:18.119
Of course, there's a ship wrong
with him. He's a crazy person.

1108
01:23:18.199 --> 01:23:23.000
Of course, he's almost when he
comes to, I think, has

1109
01:23:23.039 --> 01:23:27.159
he already been dragged into the pipe
or someone is dragging him into the big

1110
01:23:27.279 --> 01:23:30.880
drain pipe. Oh, he's unconscious, and then you see somebody dragged him

1111
01:23:30.960 --> 01:23:35.680
into the big rain water. Of
course, he wakes up in this pipe

1112
01:23:35.920 --> 01:23:40.239
and when he comes to, and
it goes back in there and opens up

1113
01:23:40.279 --> 01:23:44.199
into like a sewer. Yeah,
I mean the movie sewer like sitting it's

1114
01:23:44.279 --> 01:23:48.920
like teenage mutant Ninja Turtles underground tunnel
system. But he wakes up in there,

1115
01:23:49.079 --> 01:23:54.760
and of course that's that's where Michael
has been hanging out for like four

1116
01:23:54.920 --> 01:23:59.840
years. Yeah, apparently duck back
in this little place in the sewer drain,

1117
01:24:00.119 --> 01:24:04.159
and something weird, something weird as
funk happens. There's some kind of

1118
01:24:04.319 --> 01:24:12.520
weird telepathy where they look at each
other and it's like Michael sees all of

1119
01:24:12.760 --> 01:24:17.560
Corey's life trauma. I guess that's
how he decides he's going to be an

1120
01:24:17.600 --> 01:24:26.039
ally. And it's the laziest,
most unexplained, weird supernatural element to a

1121
01:24:26.399 --> 01:24:30.479
series of movies that's not at least
in this universe these you know, the

1122
01:24:30.520 --> 01:24:36.560
original seventy eight. In this trilogy, there's not been any fucking supernatural ship.

1123
01:24:36.920 --> 01:24:44.439
There's no old Cult of the Thorn
Salwin or sam Haine as they pronounce

1124
01:24:44.560 --> 01:24:47.000
it. There's none of that.
So they just make eye contact. Michael

1125
01:24:47.079 --> 01:24:50.239
sees the ship the dudes went through, and then all of a sudden,

1126
01:24:50.279 --> 01:24:57.000
he's imprinted on him or something yea, and influences him. He's passing on

1127
01:24:57.079 --> 01:25:00.359
the torch because he's old as fun. Yeah. Then Corey is out of

1128
01:25:00.399 --> 01:25:04.560
the pipe and then he's accosted by
this crazy old homeless Yeah. The homeless

1129
01:25:04.640 --> 01:25:09.439
Man's like they let him, let
you live. I mean, I may

1130
01:25:09.560 --> 01:25:14.159
apply that the homeless Man too was
imprinted by Michael Myers because he pulls a

1131
01:25:14.239 --> 01:25:17.199
knife on him and says that he's
Michael Myers and all this. Yeah,

1132
01:25:17.239 --> 01:25:20.399
he's like, go back in there
and get me that mask. I'm Michael

1133
01:25:20.439 --> 01:25:25.239
Myers. And it's just real fucking
stupid. So when the scuff old Corey

1134
01:25:25.359 --> 01:25:29.560
turns the knife on the homeless man
kills him and then he gets the taste

1135
01:25:29.600 --> 01:25:32.439
for blood. Yeah, and then
so like he's a bad guy. You

1136
01:25:32.479 --> 01:25:38.880
know. Well, it's funny because
you can tell when before he got thrown

1137
01:25:38.920 --> 01:25:43.000
off the bridge, when he was
getting picked on by the big bad band

1138
01:25:43.079 --> 01:25:46.880
bullies, and it was a good
alliteration. His glasses fall off and they

1139
01:25:46.920 --> 01:25:50.399
get stepped on, and it's just
it was so cliche, like, oh,

1140
01:25:50.560 --> 01:25:56.199
this is symbolic. He's turned from
like this good guy that wears glasses

1141
01:25:56.359 --> 01:26:00.479
and now he doesn't wear glasses anymore
because he's a bad guy and it's his

1142
01:26:00.760 --> 01:26:06.880
vision problems are all corrected immediately because
he's villains I don't know. And you

1143
01:26:08.039 --> 01:26:13.079
likened it to uh Cobra Kai.
Yeah, where Johnny Lawrence he tells Miguel,

1144
01:26:13.199 --> 01:26:15.800
He's like, what do you got
that thing where he's like, oh,

1145
01:26:15.880 --> 01:26:17.920
I got asthma. This is my
in Hailer and Johnny Lawrence is like,

1146
01:26:18.079 --> 01:26:23.479
Asthma's week and you're Cobra Kai.
Now you don't have asthma anymore.

1147
01:26:24.000 --> 01:26:27.399
Basically, for the rest of the
show, he never had asthma again,

1148
01:26:27.680 --> 01:26:31.159
and this is how his vision was
repaired due to the Michael Miners powers.

1149
01:26:31.439 --> 01:26:35.560
But yeah, so he's a bad
guy now and he actually drives the motorcycle.

1150
01:26:36.039 --> 01:26:42.680
Laurie sees him again and realizes he's
different, and so she goes starting

1151
01:26:42.800 --> 01:26:45.960
interviewing everybody in his life. For
some reason, he goes talks to her

1152
01:26:46.039 --> 01:26:50.119
mother, in which the mother is
mad at Laurie Strode because you're a bogeyman

1153
01:26:50.319 --> 01:26:55.479
went away. Everybody needed a new
boogeyman, so they chose my son.

1154
01:26:56.000 --> 01:27:01.239
Yeah, yeah, the mom Corey's
mom is literally aiming Laurie Strode because Michael

1155
01:27:01.319 --> 01:27:05.960
Myers isn't there terrorizing the town anymore, so all they had to focus on

1156
01:27:06.119 --> 01:27:13.920
is Corey being a bad guy because
of that little babysitting mishap. It's just

1157
01:27:14.079 --> 01:27:18.079
god this movie. So she goes
and talks to the kid who died.

1158
01:27:18.119 --> 01:27:21.239
At the beginning, he goes talks
to his dad, and the dad said

1159
01:27:21.520 --> 01:27:25.399
that Corey was a good kid,
and he's like, there's no way.

1160
01:27:25.880 --> 01:27:28.520
He's like, I knew that.
There wasn't any reason. He's like,

1161
01:27:28.560 --> 01:27:30.560
I'm trying to prove my wife wrong. I know he was a good kid,

1162
01:27:30.680 --> 01:27:33.720
and there was no way he could
did that on purpose or anything like

1163
01:27:33.880 --> 01:27:36.520
that, which they know he didn't
do it on purpose. There's tons of

1164
01:27:36.680 --> 01:27:41.800
evidence. But the dad said he
pulled up, he was driving down the

1165
01:27:41.840 --> 01:27:45.000
road and saw Corey walking down the
road and he stopped to look at him,

1166
01:27:45.000 --> 01:27:47.079
and he said, that wasn't the
same guy. He said it was.

1167
01:27:47.279 --> 01:27:50.800
It was Corey, but it wasn't
the same person. He said that

1168
01:27:51.000 --> 01:27:56.520
wasn't didn't have glass, right,
He's like that kid that mowed my lawn

1169
01:27:56.720 --> 01:27:59.800
back and they couldn't have killed my
son. He was like, but that

1170
01:28:00.119 --> 01:28:04.199
person I saw walking down the road
was very different because he wasn't wearing glasses

1171
01:28:05.239 --> 01:28:10.039
and he was dirty. I don't
know it. Yeah, it's fucking stupid.

1172
01:28:12.520 --> 01:28:15.359
This is where part of this is
part of the movie where like my

1173
01:28:15.479 --> 01:28:21.359
recollection gets shady him and lays Strude's
granddaughter are like outside the fucking radio station,

1174
01:28:21.720 --> 01:28:25.880
and like the radio d J is
a bully. He's the one that

1175
01:28:25.960 --> 01:28:31.199
said yes because your grandmother tormented a
mentally ill person and the killing people,

1176
01:28:31.520 --> 01:28:36.199
like she teased him. Where the
fund does that detail that lie come from?

1177
01:28:36.399 --> 01:28:39.920
Because she didn't know him. But
yeah, so he's a bully.

1178
01:28:40.119 --> 01:28:43.680
Of course, I don't know if
Michael or Corey takes him out. I

1179
01:28:43.760 --> 01:28:47.439
think it's Michael. Anyway, Corey
and Michael are going to go be interchangeable

1180
01:28:47.560 --> 01:28:51.960
here in a little bit. His
death was very, very gory. Yeah,

1181
01:28:53.000 --> 01:28:56.000
a little over the top of his
heads on the record that cuts his

1182
01:28:56.119 --> 01:29:00.720
tongue out, makes the record skipped, and yeah, very it was brutal,

1183
01:29:01.960 --> 01:29:06.359
butal, a real brutal place.
And then like the band kids are

1184
01:29:06.399 --> 01:29:12.279
still after Corey and there's like this
big Rigg and morrole at the junkyard where

1185
01:29:12.319 --> 01:29:15.520
Corey works, where he lures them
out there and takes them all out.

1186
01:29:15.880 --> 01:29:21.960
But Corey at this point is wearing
Michael's He's full Michael myros regalia, the

1187
01:29:23.039 --> 01:29:27.119
bowlers and all that ship. The
puppy band kids shot the step dad in

1188
01:29:27.199 --> 01:29:30.239
the head. The step dad gave
him a gun to kill out there.

1189
01:29:30.359 --> 01:29:34.760
Step nobody has a real life human
reaction. So the step dad is like

1190
01:29:35.119 --> 01:29:40.199
down on the ground, and this
kid pulls a gun and aims it at

1191
01:29:40.399 --> 01:29:44.399
Corey who's standing behind the step dad, and instead of like, oh ship,

1192
01:29:44.520 --> 01:29:45.560
he's got a gun, I'm going
to stay down, the step dad

1193
01:29:45.680 --> 01:29:49.239
just like pops up and puts his
hands up like, oh no, don't

1194
01:29:49.319 --> 01:29:54.840
shoot, like as he's pulling the
trigger. Yeah, and so he shoots

1195
01:29:54.920 --> 01:29:58.760
him right in. Then, so
somebody's run over something like some of the

1196
01:29:58.880 --> 01:30:03.640
kills are decent this movie. That's
that's something to its merit anyhow that they

1197
01:30:03.720 --> 01:30:09.079
all he kills all the band kids. And then Corey goes over to Laurie

1198
01:30:09.159 --> 01:30:14.920
Strode's house in full regalia and she
fights him and there's a whole thing there,

1199
01:30:15.239 --> 01:30:18.239
and then he was like, basically, if I can't have your granddaughter,

1200
01:30:19.239 --> 01:30:24.520
we're missing a whole giant Well,
I told you that I couldn't remember,

1201
01:30:24.720 --> 01:30:28.920
Like it's my brains trying to erase
it, I know, but I'm

1202
01:30:28.960 --> 01:30:33.800
just saying, we forgot to mention
that her granddaughter, who obviously neither of

1203
01:30:33.920 --> 01:30:39.399
us can remember her name, but
the granddaughter Lorie's trying to tell her like

1204
01:30:39.560 --> 01:30:44.640
I I talked to him, and
there's a darkness there. It's the same

1205
01:30:44.760 --> 01:30:48.199
darkness that I saw in Michael and
the granddaughters, Like you don't know what

1206
01:30:48.279 --> 01:30:53.800
you're talking about, Grandma, fuck
you, your senile and your it was

1207
01:30:53.880 --> 01:30:57.880
all your faults to begin with.
And like, yeah, just turning on

1208
01:30:58.039 --> 01:31:00.359
her, you're putting your ship on
me. And it's like you have been

1209
01:31:00.520 --> 01:31:08.239
dating this guy for four days and
Allison, Allison is the granddaughter's name.

1210
01:31:08.479 --> 01:31:12.439
It's too late to even get into
it now, but Allison, but Allison

1211
01:31:12.520 --> 01:31:18.119
and Corey had made plans to just
ditch leave town and they're going to take

1212
01:31:18.239 --> 01:31:28.439
his little scooter and get the The
Strode family should have bounce. Why do

1213
01:31:28.560 --> 01:31:34.239
you still live in the town?
Had so Yeah, the granddaughter this whole

1214
01:31:34.319 --> 01:31:41.640
time is completely backing Corey, just
blindly for I don't know, Yeah,

1215
01:31:41.720 --> 01:31:45.960
I get it, but it was
almost to the point. But you know,

1216
01:31:46.119 --> 01:31:49.600
Dick, I mean he didn't I
don't know, man, he looked

1217
01:31:49.680 --> 01:31:56.720
like a like a scared little rabbit. It looks like a bit I mean,

1218
01:31:56.800 --> 01:31:59.920
he does look like a badass without
his glasses on. There's very little

1219
01:32:00.039 --> 01:32:05.279
redeeming things about this guy. She
almost got to the point where you wondered,

1220
01:32:05.520 --> 01:32:09.479
oh, is she gonna like team
up with him and start killing people

1221
01:32:09.560 --> 01:32:12.760
with him? Because she was just
so in his corner. Well, if

1222
01:32:12.800 --> 01:32:15.520
he's doing something wrong, he's got
a reason for it. Like it was

1223
01:32:16.000 --> 01:32:21.159
weird, man, its weird.
Laurie Strode implies that like, you're I

1224
01:32:21.279 --> 01:32:27.840
guess close to Michael. Your proximity
to him somehow puts a darkness on you.

1225
01:32:28.279 --> 01:32:31.079
That like she resisted, she's implying
it with the way she talked,

1226
01:32:31.199 --> 01:32:34.079
but anyway, the darkness is on
him. And then what what does he

1227
01:32:34.199 --> 01:32:39.239
say before he tries to kill himself. Now, he said something about like

1228
01:32:40.000 --> 01:32:43.680
if I can't have her whatever,
blah blah blah, something to that extent,

1229
01:32:43.840 --> 01:32:48.199
something a model and melodramatic. Very
you won't let me have your granddaughter,

1230
01:32:48.279 --> 01:32:51.079
so I'm going to kill myself.
Yeah, So he stabs himself on

1231
01:32:51.159 --> 01:32:55.399
the neck and Laurie starts pissed at
him for it. It's like, you

1232
01:32:55.560 --> 01:32:59.159
stupid son of a bitch. And
then as soon as she pulls the knife

1233
01:32:59.159 --> 01:33:01.760
out of his neck and this is
like muff in hand, grand utter,

1234
01:33:01.880 --> 01:33:11.159
Alison walks in grandmo do Meanwhile,
Michael's in their house. Michael's there up

1235
01:33:11.199 --> 01:33:15.920
in the peace. Yeah, because
he comes in and he finishes Corey off,

1236
01:33:15.720 --> 01:33:20.119
which was a mercy killing. It
was a mercy killing to the audience.

1237
01:33:20.600 --> 01:33:26.399
Michael snuffed Corey out like a half
smoked pall mall one, like he

1238
01:33:26.560 --> 01:33:30.000
was nothing, which was appropriate because
Corey was nothing. But yeah, it

1239
01:33:30.119 --> 01:33:33.920
kills him, finishes him off because
he's still not glad to dath right,

1240
01:33:33.920 --> 01:33:38.960
he couldn't even do that, right, But Corey had already He did kill

1241
01:33:39.039 --> 01:33:44.199
his mom, he had he killed
several people. Yeah, so he's got

1242
01:33:44.279 --> 01:33:48.159
a few on his body count.
Because Michael is acting through him or some

1243
01:33:48.359 --> 01:33:53.600
ship. It's never explained to him. He didn't even eat his gross nasty

1244
01:33:53.840 --> 01:33:59.079
black heart or anything, right,
not like the fucking disaster and horrible,

1245
01:33:59.159 --> 01:34:02.279
horrible movie that as Jason goes to
hell. There's a movie they made to

1246
01:34:02.399 --> 01:34:08.520
try to torpedo the franchise after New
Line Cinema bought it, and it's still

1247
01:34:08.600 --> 01:34:12.399
better than Yeah, it's still better, still got so much more going for

1248
01:34:12.479 --> 01:34:15.680
it than this movie does. Anyway, there's the big fight with Michael.

1249
01:34:15.880 --> 01:34:19.439
Laurie Strode and Michael fight. Just
imagine you're the police and you're answering a

1250
01:34:19.560 --> 01:34:26.920
domestic disturbance call from a nursing home. Michael is finally subdued when he's like

1251
01:34:27.159 --> 01:34:32.239
kind of crucified to the table with
knos And then didn't she pulled a refrigerator

1252
01:34:32.319 --> 01:34:35.720
down on him? Yeah, he's
got like his so he's not going anywhere.

1253
01:34:35.960 --> 01:34:41.600
She fucking stabs him in the chest
or neck and then like slices open

1254
01:34:42.119 --> 01:34:45.439
his wrists. First she had the
knife stabbed through his hand, didn't she,

1255
01:34:45.640 --> 01:34:48.319
And he like, as she's trying
to do something, he pulls his

1256
01:34:48.840 --> 01:34:56.840
hand out over the knife, you
know, and obviously completely had momentarily at

1257
01:34:56.920 --> 01:35:00.880
the end, and then Allison comes
back to help. She takes off his

1258
01:35:00.039 --> 01:35:03.600
masks. You don't see his face
completely, but he's all ragged out.

1259
01:35:03.720 --> 01:35:09.720
You know, he got burnt and
the Halloween not two thousand eighteen Halloween.

1260
01:35:09.880 --> 01:35:12.960
You know, he got burnt.
So he's just got white, scraggly hair,

1261
01:35:13.800 --> 01:35:17.199
looks like an old man that has
been you know, burnt years earlier,

1262
01:35:17.359 --> 01:35:20.159
and just looks like growny old man. You see the side of his

1263
01:35:20.239 --> 01:35:25.960
head. He's dead. Michael Myers
is dad for real or no bullshit,

1264
01:35:26.680 --> 01:35:29.520
you know, like the series tries
to pull, which I'm gonna bitch about

1265
01:35:29.560 --> 01:35:32.720
it later after we're done with this, but yeah, it's they literally like

1266
01:35:33.199 --> 01:35:38.359
people pop out of the woodwork from
like the last movies that hadn't been in

1267
01:35:38.479 --> 01:35:40.880
them, you know, they just
popped up because they're like, hey,

1268
01:35:41.000 --> 01:35:45.359
I'm here too. They basically throw
Michael on top of their suv and through

1269
01:35:45.439 --> 01:35:49.399
town tied to the roof, and
all the people come out of the house

1270
01:35:49.520 --> 01:35:55.640
is candle light and vigil top ship
black boy who's an orphan now because of

1271
01:35:55.840 --> 01:35:59.279
him, I guess he said,
the black Sheriff for whatever, and you

1272
01:35:59.359 --> 01:36:04.199
know whoever, other people that have
been vicariously affected by Michael. And they

1273
01:36:04.279 --> 01:36:12.880
all go to the junkyard where Corey
worked and they throw Michael into the crusher,

1274
01:36:13.520 --> 01:36:16.000
which is probably the best part of
the movement. It wasn't a crusher.

1275
01:36:16.840 --> 01:36:21.680
It was that like a grinder,
like, um, it grounds,

1276
01:36:21.880 --> 01:36:26.720
you put metal on it and it
pulls in while crushing. It's like,

1277
01:36:26.880 --> 01:36:29.159
yeah, it's like one that's not
a press, is what I was saying,

1278
01:36:29.199 --> 01:36:30.760
Like, it's not. It's not
the big press. It's like the

1279
01:36:30.880 --> 01:36:34.960
thing that with teeth that skins,
like um what what? Then? Am

1280
01:36:35.000 --> 01:36:41.560
I think a tree. Damn.
Yeah, like that. So this is

1281
01:36:41.680 --> 01:36:44.960
more of a grinder than a crusher, and it pulls, it pulls in

1282
01:36:45.079 --> 01:36:47.479
the crushes the same time. You
know the mechanism, but like it's awesome

1283
01:36:47.560 --> 01:36:54.119
because it's a definitive fucking death for
Michael Myers, since everything's always in the

1284
01:36:54.159 --> 01:36:57.199
Old Cities, was like, no, it wasn't really him. He put

1285
01:36:57.279 --> 01:37:00.319
it, put his mask on somebody
else or some convolution did bullshit that they

1286
01:37:00.439 --> 01:37:05.000
kept turning out movies using. But
he is pulled in, his body is

1287
01:37:05.079 --> 01:37:09.199
crushed. They put his mask back
on him and his head gets in there

1288
01:37:09.199 --> 01:37:15.199
and his head pops like a pumpkin's
great huge hunk of skull goes flying.

1289
01:37:15.359 --> 01:37:18.680
It's that was pretty. It's sucking
great, And this is something that happened.

1290
01:37:18.960 --> 01:37:24.119
I'll facetiously say stuff will happen,
Like when Game of Thrones was one,

1291
01:37:24.199 --> 01:37:28.520
I was like, you watch,
it'll be king Brand and because I

1292
01:37:28.680 --> 01:37:32.199
was joking, and then it happened, and then yeah, Brand was actually

1293
01:37:32.760 --> 01:37:38.840
made keen in the Game of Thrones, and I felt like I made that

1294
01:37:39.039 --> 01:37:43.359
happen by putting it out and with
my intent putting it out into the universe.

1295
01:37:43.560 --> 01:37:46.720
And who has a better story and
brand the broken No one gives a

1296
01:37:46.800 --> 01:37:54.920
fuck up. Whenever we were watching
this movie, I said something stupid like,

1297
01:37:55.159 --> 01:37:59.640
you know, Michael Myers is not
credited as Michael Myers. He's known

1298
01:37:59.720 --> 01:38:04.239
as the Shape, which is the
most pretentious fucking horseship I've ever heard.

1299
01:38:04.399 --> 01:38:11.000
It sounds like the Shape. It's
sucking Michael Myers. It's sucking Michael Myers.

1300
01:38:11.119 --> 01:38:15.600
It's a dude. I said something
like Elaine like tagline. Tagline could

1301
01:38:15.640 --> 01:38:21.359
be uh, something like evil never
ends, it just changes shape, you

1302
01:38:21.399 --> 01:38:26.399
know. I said it jokingly.
And meanwhile, throughout Lorie Strode is writing

1303
01:38:26.520 --> 01:38:32.479
like an autobiographical crime thing or just
about Bophy Boogeyman in general, because she

1304
01:38:32.640 --> 01:38:39.840
covers like all this different stuff and
she literally tops that at the end of

1305
01:38:39.880 --> 01:38:45.840
the or something to that, something
similar to the changes shape thing, And

1306
01:38:45.039 --> 01:38:50.520
I just I just wanted to barf. It was it was hilarious because you

1307
01:38:50.680 --> 01:38:56.600
were you just spouted off the most
ridiculous asinine. Then you could think,

1308
01:38:56.720 --> 01:39:00.640
yeah, and that was actually what
was of them, like a big profound

1309
01:39:02.119 --> 01:39:05.439
moment in the movie. It's very
funny. But yeah, I want to

1310
01:39:05.800 --> 01:39:12.039
not think about that movie anymore.
But I'm going to continue bitching. Stephanie's

1311
01:39:12.079 --> 01:39:16.199
got a sign off because it's very
light and she's got an actual life and

1312
01:39:17.000 --> 01:39:21.239
responsibilities. I gotta go to work, I gotta bring home that bacon baby,

1313
01:39:21.560 --> 01:39:27.840
and um, of course a worthless
light about nowadays is not true.

1314
01:39:28.319 --> 01:39:32.960
I haven't had to fold a towel
in. I'm very basically vegetative. And

1315
01:39:34.319 --> 01:39:38.800
but Stephanie's gonna go to bed,
so I'm gonna say good night to her,

1316
01:39:39.079 --> 01:39:42.720
and then I'm going to continue bitching
about stuff and wrap this up because

1317
01:39:43.159 --> 01:39:45.079
it's very long and I've got to
edit it. It's gonna be a super

1318
01:39:45.199 --> 01:39:51.000
duper jam packed episode. I'm not
cut it into two. But anyway,

1319
01:39:51.119 --> 01:39:56.279
I'm gonna put step to bed and
they'll be back to bitch, I say

1320
01:39:56.600 --> 01:40:01.760
stuff. This has been a one
More mosh Pit production, available in Spotify,

1321
01:40:02.000 --> 01:40:08.800
Google and Apple Podcast and Stitcher basically
wherever you can find quality podcast.

1322
01:40:09.079 --> 01:40:12.039
If you like what you heard here
today, spread of word, or go

1323
01:40:12.239 --> 01:40:15.560
check us out on Facebook. We
have a page you can come and lick

1324
01:40:15.680 --> 01:40:17.800
and follow us and keep up with
all our stuff. And you know what,

1325
01:40:17.960 --> 01:40:20.920
if you didn't like what you heard
here today, keep that ship for

1326
01:40:20.960 --> 01:40:21.720
yourself. Huh,