The Brown College Experience

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Welcome back to another episode
of This Is Down for the Brown
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Podcast, a podcast to online
estra gente to empower
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communities of color, and to
most importantly, make our
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voices heard.
Episode 31.
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Thank you all for tuning in.
Without further ado, we'll go
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ahead and jump right in with me
today.
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I have the pleasure of sharing
the mic with two important
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individuals, those of who I've
had an experience with, a very
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good experience and friendship
with throughout my university
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experience.
So without further ado, let's go
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ahead and hop into the episode.
So welcome back, everybody.
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With me today I have the honor
of sharing the mic with two
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guest speakers.
Right now I'm just going to have
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them introduce themselves, give
us a little bit of an insight
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about who they are and what they
do.
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When I started this, my name is
comedy pronouncing them Bentley.
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I'm an intern for local
nonprofits and I'm coming and
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I'm getting my bachelor's degree
and the team studies.
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Hopefully this is my last
semester so I.
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Hello everybody, my name is
Jaime Cortes Jimenez.
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I'm originally from Burwood
City.
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I just graduated from Sonoma
State with the Bachelors of
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China Latino Studies and right
now I'm working at two jobs,
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being the white PL. which is a
youth program leader here at the
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middle school and being like AP
plus coach.
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So kind of like a another job
added into it.
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Awesome, awesome.
So we're putting everything to
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work.
So that's good.
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It's the was just to kind of
kick off the episode today's
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episode will be about the I I
titled it the Brown College
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Experience just because of the
topic that we're going to be
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talking about.
It's going to focus a little bit
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on our experience as brown men
in a university campus as well
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as a perspective from a from
Handry.
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So just from the conversation
kind of started with there's so
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many few men in our department
that graduated with us that
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we're kind of we're kind of like
wanting to look into like why is
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there such a small percentage of
males attending a university or
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a college.
So we're just going to go ahead
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and kick off the episode with
that.
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And so I feel like one of the
questions that I have was like
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what was the motivator for
getting through through a higher
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education for y'all, Like what
was the push factor?
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Are you the first in your family
or is there other steps that you
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followed that wanted you to
pursue a higher education?
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Or how is it that you ended up
in the position that you are in
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now, so feel free to share.
So basically, yeah.
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So a reason for me that was a
push back, push back there for
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me like to go to higher end was
I think about my family
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especially my parents when they
were young they their dream was
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to go to school and get the
education but unfortunately it
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wasn't that the case because due
to strict parents you know they
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were always.
They had that limit to, like
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always keep working.
They didn't have that
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opportunity, like how I had to
go to school and you know,
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continue going and finishing
off.
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And for me, I looked up too much
to my mom because she was the
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one that really, like, pushed me
to keep going to school.
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Make sure I go to all the
classes, make sure I didn't miss
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out, Make sure I would go to
every meeting, but also make
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have fun, You know, make as much
friends as I can and then with
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my teachers, connect with
counselors and just move on from
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there just so I won't feel like
I almost alone.
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Can also like make me feel like
I'm I'm building community and
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like make sure like I'm able to
like have great connections with
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friends is there for me.
So I'm just kind of like we'll
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keep saying going and higher end
and like wanting to still
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continue sort of like pursuing
more or like at least like
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looking into it is I feel like
this summer coming in is talking
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me a lot but just kind of
reflecting with my mom.
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I feel like my mom is like a
core person that I was kind of
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like.
Talk to and whatever she says I
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just kind of take back and
reflect on a lot of like me just
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kind of continue continuing to
like as to yeah people's and
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that I keep was that like so
immigrants.
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So immigrants struggle like OK
yes.
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Like if you go by I need and
like growing up I always heard
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her talk about like well she
used to be a secret area.
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I'm gonna stop at Mexico.
But she just never got the
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opportunity to continue school.
So for me, I feel like me going
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to school is like almost like a
continuation of her.
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So I kissed almost.
And, you know, keep working and
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bringing the family with us or
ancestors with us.
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Yeah, that's very powerful.
That's beautiful.
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And I like the way you say it
because I also see like a
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reflection of myself and my
parents.
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My parents only attended the 3rd
grade, I can say, and primarily
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it was because of poverty.
They grew up in a little
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ranchito where the nearest city
was maybe hours away.
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So transportation was not an
option for them.
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Everything was horseback, like,
you know, riding and everything
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transporting back and forth.
And just from a very young age,
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they were just focused on
gaining like a financial support
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as much as possible.
A lot of the foods they ate,
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they cultivated themselves.
So kind of relying on, on
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society itself was kind of
difficult at times, especially
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when you don't know how to, I
guess, approach that path.
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And to have an education in
medical like where my parents
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are from is like super rare.
Like it's a luxury.
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It's an expression of, you know,
we made it or like we have it,
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you know.
So not a lot of people have
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access to that, just sincerely,
Like, I never really saw myself
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past high school, like obtaining
an education.
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I never really got the talk that
school was very important and
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that I was going to get
somewhere in life.
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For me, it was mostly like I got
to find a job to be able to pay
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bills, you know, to be able to
help my family.
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I was never given that college
talk of you got to go to school,
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you know, you got to apply to
schools.
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And I reflect back to, you know,
I've mentioned it a couple times
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where like my senior year of
high school, I would bump into
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my classmates like them talking
about like, oh, I got a
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substitute, you know, San
Francisco or Sacramento.
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And, you know, there was that
question that was just crawling
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up on me like, where did you get
accepted, you know, And I said,
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I don't know.
I never applied.
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Like, I don't know what I'm
doing after high school.
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So just, you know, I I totally
agree with seeing being able to
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carry something that my parents
weren't able to for my not just
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for myself, but for them as
well.
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And having graduated like
university, like it's just to
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this day, it's unreal like.
I always told myself, like, I
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hate going to school.
Like it's a drag sometimes.
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Like doing homework.
Like I was procrastinating until
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the very last minute and I still
got my assignments through Beto.
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Plus, as to now having
graduated, like it's a totally
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different feeling.
Like I miss going to class.
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Like, you know, I have to drive
through the university every now
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and then because it's just like,
you know, I made a lot of good
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memories with people and and
instructors there and it's just
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like, damn, just like that.
It's just it's just another day
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for us, you know?
It's the what's next, you know,
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what's the next chapter going to
be written about?
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But yeah, that's as far as my
personal experience.
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Thank you all for sharing.
And I think that as people of
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color, like some of us might
have had like a better
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experience, like having that
talk about education, you know,
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some more than others.
Like I said, for me it was never
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like, oh, you got to go to
school.
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Like, you know, and to this day,
my parents, you know, they know
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that I graduated and everything.
They were there to support me,
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but they don't know what I'm
going to school for.
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They don't know what I went to
school for.
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So, like my mom.
Like, you know, right after
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graduation.
She was like, well, now you can
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get a better job.
Now you can teach, right.
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And I'm like, Mom, I'm just
stepping my foot into the door
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right now.
Like I still have a lot of
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education to go through.
And that's just like you know
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speaking from a different
perspective that I think that as
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much as I explained to them like
I don't it's it's hard for them
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to understand just you know it's
hard for them to even accept
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like a university diploma to
them like I'm already awaiting
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that call like yo your.
Diplomas here, come pick it up
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and it's just like that's that's
yours, like you keep it, you
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know that's a resemblance of
what I have done for for all of
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us.
So it's kind of, you know, it's
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it's pretty difficult sometimes
to be able to accept that and
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talk about those things.
But it was.
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I guess that was no no how much
it was.
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Now it's time to put into work
you know everything that we
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worked hard for.
So thank you all for sharing and
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it's the the next question I
have is having attended A
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primarily white institution,
what were some of the things you
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did to keep yourself grounded,
connected to your roots?
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Like what is something that you
were a part of that you try to,
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you know uprise?
Because I know for me like it
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was difficult and I, you know,
went to class, got out of class,
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went home like I never really
had the chance to take on any
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extracurricular activities as
much as like I wanted to like I
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just had to work full time.
So like I didn't really have an
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option, but maybe y'all did
like.
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Yeah, so like as a transfer
student, I was really like, you
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know, trying to find a way where
I can like build community.
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So definitely I looked at the
department at first, think about
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the professor does professors
who just kept me like in touch
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with like?
I only done, but also the
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students in in my, in my
classes, you know, like you will
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see the same students in same
classes from our council
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department.
And it wasn't like, it wasn't an
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I didn't find it like annoying.
It was more like, oh, I see you
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again.
Like now it's kind of like, you
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know, we're not like how do you
say we're not like straight
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Rangers, you know, we're more
like, you know, like we see each
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other every day.
We're more like connected now
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and closed.
So for me it was like try to
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hang out with them as much as
possible.
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Because I know, like if I wasn't
then it would have been hard for
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me to try to like find somebody
else or build more friends when
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I already had this group of
friends already like super close
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and super touching.
But then also like, I was able.
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I was able to like, you know,
get get invited to like
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curricular activities by some
friends.
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And for me it was nice.
But also I wanted to keep that
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same friendship for my
department because I know, like,
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it's like, you see, you're going
to see these people for like,
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like throughout your throughout
your education, higher Ed.
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And, you know, like, it's kind
of like you don't want to miss
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those people or lose those
people because, you know, they
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mean so much to you and and all
the memories that you guys build
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through is like, it's kind of
like you always want to like,
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keep those and like never, like,
lose them, you know?
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Yeah, I agree.
For me, questions on like, kind
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of like staying connected to
like, Madura, like our roots,
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right?
Like for me, I feel like it's
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kind of like like staying
connected with like.
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The house department really,
because I feel like as a as a
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freshman I didn't enter as a
kind of the team studies major.
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And then when I did take my
first class it was almost like I
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was like almost like adopted by
a group of mojits.
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And for me and like my
experience like that really
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shaped my like getting involved
and like understanding why it's
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important to get involved.
Like these mojits were just kind
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of like whispering in my ear.
Like if you want to make it
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through, you need a support
system.
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Like you like the message,
Because I think the mucho is it
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takes the village.
Yeah.
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And it really does like every
single person contributes to
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your experience and at times the
meeting you're not taking that
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space away from the cows
apartment and going into like
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for me like the woman in gender
studies department or going into
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other spaces where like.
It's done indicated and I'm a
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hold it's not Cosa but at the
same time like the way they're
224
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experiencing maybe in the STEM
department like the same sort of
225
00:12:12,410 --> 00:12:17,330
like barriers or the same like
just like like difficult.
226
00:12:17,330 --> 00:12:20,770
That is, you know, like, I feel
like just kind of like finding
227
00:12:20,770 --> 00:12:22,530
the people.
Poquito, Poquito and like,
228
00:12:23,050 --> 00:12:27,170
honestly, I went to like, like
cows and like kind of like
229
00:12:27,170 --> 00:12:30,890
finding the group of mojnas over
just like you like, get involved
230
00:12:30,890 --> 00:12:32,880
like.
If you get involved, like, you
231
00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,280
know, like let's just look it up
aside, you know, like sort of
232
00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:39,200
like, yeah, like I can't say
handle me, you know, and it's
233
00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:43,040
like it's 1st Jan and like as
like for me like a second
234
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:47,040
generation immigrant like, you
know, like that those voices are
235
00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:51,080
needed for like guidance.
And also just to like understand
236
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:54,240
how the structures work like as
first Jan you don't know how it
237
00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:58,400
works but just having all of
these like sort of like mentors
238
00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:00,200
and femtos to like guide you
like.
239
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:03,360
Definitely keeps you connected
to your Google do that, but at
240
00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:07,480
the same time keeps you like
Rosperano and like you know
241
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:12,680
finding the the fruit that to
the training.
242
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,680
Yeah, most definitely.
No, I couldn't agree more.
243
00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:20,680
I think that one of the things
that like I always take back is
244
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:24,310
like being able to not just
connect with people like, you
245
00:13:24,310 --> 00:13:27,070
know, in a classroom, but the
stories that some of the my
246
00:13:27,070 --> 00:13:30,070
classmates would tell like I,
you know, I would be like Dang,
247
00:13:30,070 --> 00:13:33,550
that's that's my parents story,
you know, that's my story too.
248
00:13:33,550 --> 00:13:36,550
So like I really resonated a lot
with like a lot of our
249
00:13:36,550 --> 00:13:39,470
companions.
Companions, you know, just from
250
00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:42,070
the stories I had to tell.
And you know, you could tell it
251
00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:45,030
was real when like people would
open up like that, you know.
252
00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:48,550
And it was just like these
settings where these classrooms,
253
00:13:48,550 --> 00:13:51,930
like were able to, you know,
fully express ourselves and what
254
00:13:51,930 --> 00:13:55,490
our thoughts are, you know,
through through like very
255
00:13:55,490 --> 00:13:57,650
different, like lectures and
stuff like that.
256
00:13:58,050 --> 00:14:01,250
A lot of the readings too, I
enjoyed like I'll never, you
257
00:14:01,250 --> 00:14:02,650
know, forget all the readings we
had.
258
00:14:03,130 --> 00:14:06,450
They're just very intellectual.
Like it really kept me grounded
259
00:14:06,530 --> 00:14:09,170
and like both of Y'all said,
like staying connected with your
260
00:14:09,170 --> 00:14:11,730
peers, like.
That that was probably one of
261
00:14:11,730 --> 00:14:17,040
the most people things because
having been first Gen. like I
262
00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:20,360
was counting on on other people
to like also guide me while they
263
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:23,360
were doing it for the very first
time too, you know And maybe if
264
00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:25,400
I was doing something for the
very first time like I would
265
00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:28,480
help them too.
So it was something to like you
266
00:14:28,480 --> 00:14:30,800
know it's like you learn and you
also give.
267
00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:34,840
So just a very beautiful thing
is the did y'all feel like y'all
268
00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:38,520
were very supported throughout,
like your university experience
269
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:41,840
with instructors, mentors,
counselors?
270
00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,080
Like how was that for you?
Yeah, definitely as soon as
271
00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:46,820
profile.
Saw me for the first time and
272
00:14:46,820 --> 00:14:49,820
told me about the department.
Like at first like I saw her
273
00:14:49,820 --> 00:14:52,900
passion, how interested she was
to bringing me over.
274
00:14:52,900 --> 00:14:55,660
And I saw in her eyes she was
really like, you know, like this
275
00:14:55,660 --> 00:14:57,300
is this could be the right fit
for you.
276
00:14:57,980 --> 00:15:00,660
And you know, I believed in her
because I remember this was like
277
00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:03,860
the first house 350, first class
in the department.
278
00:15:03,860 --> 00:15:06,100
And I mean that's when I started
seeing everybody, like you know,
279
00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:08,580
most of you guys and and
everyone was connecting
280
00:15:08,580 --> 00:15:11,020
everywhere.
Everyone was very respectful,
281
00:15:11,060 --> 00:15:14,220
social.
You know we share stories.
282
00:15:14,220 --> 00:15:17,870
You know we share.
Our interests, our fears and
283
00:15:17,870 --> 00:15:19,870
stuff like that.
So it was kind of like our
284
00:15:19,870 --> 00:15:24,070
family was starting to build and
for me it was like the
285
00:15:24,070 --> 00:15:26,950
professors care, really do care
about everybody in the classroom
286
00:15:26,950 --> 00:15:29,030
is not just one student over the
other.
287
00:15:29,030 --> 00:15:31,910
It's more like you know they
they guide us what we have to do
288
00:15:32,470 --> 00:15:34,630
and you know they tell us who
our counselors are.
289
00:15:34,630 --> 00:15:37,670
Just make sure like connect with
them, meet with them one-on-one.
290
00:15:37,670 --> 00:15:41,510
You know, definitely, if you
have a question and don't never
291
00:15:41,510 --> 00:15:43,590
feel hesitant to like, reach out
and ask.
292
00:15:43,590 --> 00:15:45,740
Because I know like.
You could have the same question
293
00:15:45,740 --> 00:15:49,380
as like four other five other
peers in your classroom and you
294
00:15:49,380 --> 00:15:53,260
know, like one can, one answer
can just like so everybody's
295
00:15:53,260 --> 00:15:55,500
problems.
And for me, like, it was kind of
296
00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:57,460
like everyone felt welcome,
welcome.
297
00:15:57,980 --> 00:16:00,980
And that's that's when I knew
like, you know, like I'm safe
298
00:16:00,980 --> 00:16:04,900
here and you know, I'm having a
good time and I don't see myself
299
00:16:04,900 --> 00:16:08,180
in another department really,
but definitely got the support
300
00:16:08,820 --> 00:16:11,140
from my counselors.
And if it's not just done, then
301
00:16:11,140 --> 00:16:14,780
it's also my peers as well.
It's there for OK, finding a
302
00:16:14,780 --> 00:16:18,940
support system.
I say yes and no or cables.
303
00:16:18,940 --> 00:16:22,380
I feel like I had to work really
hard to find that support
304
00:16:22,380 --> 00:16:24,300
system.
You know where I feel like some
305
00:16:24,300 --> 00:16:27,420
students come in with that
institutional knowledge or like
306
00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:32,500
you know like that sort of like
understanding of again like
307
00:16:32,500 --> 00:16:34,980
penis can contract to hand.
The penis can contract you know
308
00:16:34,980 --> 00:16:39,020
like a supportive department and
sometimes like.
309
00:16:39,430 --> 00:16:43,430
We just don't know, you know.
And to build a support system
310
00:16:43,430 --> 00:16:46,950
like that specifically like in
different spaces of like the
311
00:16:46,950 --> 00:16:50,910
university, like yeah, I do feel
supported in the Cal department.
312
00:16:50,910 --> 00:16:53,310
But like, you know, there comes
times where I have to have a key
313
00:16:53,310 --> 00:16:57,590
for financial aid on my on my
own or there's like just basic
314
00:16:57,590 --> 00:17:00,070
needs struggle sometimes, you
know, and like it's stuff that
315
00:17:00,070 --> 00:17:02,950
are like kind of like still
interfering with the way you're
316
00:17:02,950 --> 00:17:06,869
navigating your degree, but sort
of like external from your
317
00:17:07,150 --> 00:17:11,069
department and so like.
Overall university like there's
318
00:17:11,069 --> 00:17:14,310
different, you know, sort of
like support that you need and
319
00:17:14,550 --> 00:17:17,710
sometimes like you might have
like 1 or like a group of people
320
00:17:17,710 --> 00:17:19,030
that like support you really
well.
321
00:17:19,430 --> 00:17:22,670
But all this is you know there
there's still that gap where you
322
00:17:22,670 --> 00:17:27,190
have to work extra hard to find
like somebody that like can help
323
00:17:27,190 --> 00:17:30,470
you and like you know can say
you know and like I don't know
324
00:17:30,470 --> 00:17:33,910
at least for me like I feel
really supported like really
325
00:17:33,910 --> 00:17:37,590
supported.
But I mean, you know, like.
326
00:17:38,650 --> 00:17:41,450
It kind of takes that little
push from yourself to like ask
327
00:17:41,450 --> 00:17:45,090
questions and just kind of like
go above and beyond to like
328
00:17:45,090 --> 00:17:48,970
build these connections because,
you know, like, I guess that's,
329
00:17:49,090 --> 00:17:51,330
you know, and you're just kind
of going through the motions and
330
00:17:51,610 --> 00:17:53,890
sometimes like it can be really
isolating.
331
00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:59,450
So yeah, I could understand
that, especially when I feel
332
00:17:59,450 --> 00:18:02,770
like we could all speak of, you
know, the experience we had of
333
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,090
just feeling unmotivated in the
classroom.
334
00:18:05,090 --> 00:18:09,410
You know, I think it all comes
from, you know, there's already
335
00:18:09,410 --> 00:18:10,850
a lot of weight on the
instructors.
336
00:18:10,850 --> 00:18:12,250
And, you know, that's
understandable.
337
00:18:12,250 --> 00:18:15,730
But I feel like they're the ones
who are, you know, the ones that
338
00:18:15,730 --> 00:18:18,450
should be pushing us the most to
be able to feel, feel
339
00:18:18,450 --> 00:18:21,730
comfortable and open up to them.
You know, like I personally, I
340
00:18:21,730 --> 00:18:24,850
don't even think I talked to
like a counselor to like my
341
00:18:24,850 --> 00:18:28,890
very, like last two semesters.
And that was just of, you know,
342
00:18:29,530 --> 00:18:33,410
of me being, like, not being on
campus as much, not being able
343
00:18:33,410 --> 00:18:36,790
to connect with them as much and
everything.
344
00:18:36,790 --> 00:18:38,990
Like whenever I had to sign up
for classes, like, I would reach
345
00:18:38,990 --> 00:18:41,950
out to like the Dream Center or
something and then they would
346
00:18:41,950 --> 00:18:45,070
help me.
But I wasn't connecting with my
347
00:18:45,510 --> 00:18:47,630
with my counselor, you know, my
direct counselor.
348
00:18:47,630 --> 00:18:51,510
And so I feel like if I had time
and I had the opportunity to go
349
00:18:51,510 --> 00:18:54,630
back and restart, like I'd
probably, you know, reach out
350
00:18:54,630 --> 00:18:57,750
more more than I, you know, I
would have wished of reaching
351
00:18:57,750 --> 00:18:59,510
out.
Because in the end like it
352
00:18:59,510 --> 00:19:02,150
really helps you and you know,
it also connects you with them
353
00:19:02,150 --> 00:19:04,820
and they also give you
connections of out there,
354
00:19:04,820 --> 00:19:08,940
resources that you can rely on
to be able to like successfully.
355
00:19:08,940 --> 00:19:13,580
Like you know, you know, take
your time with classes, choose
356
00:19:13,780 --> 00:19:16,700
everything wisely and you know,
focus more on what you really
357
00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:19,780
want to do and not just, you
know, cut it short.
358
00:19:20,220 --> 00:19:24,140
But I feel like towards the end,
things kind of got like, a
359
00:19:24,140 --> 00:19:27,780
little bit messy.
Like I was on the fence of not
360
00:19:28,300 --> 00:19:31,260
possibly not graduating.
You know, like missing classes,
361
00:19:31,260 --> 00:19:35,810
like time after time after being
told you're fine, don't worry
362
00:19:35,810 --> 00:19:37,530
about it, everything's gonna be
fine.
363
00:19:37,930 --> 00:19:41,250
And then at the very end, you're
not gonna graduate, you're
364
00:19:41,250 --> 00:19:42,970
missing a class, you're missing
this.
365
00:19:42,970 --> 00:19:45,410
And I'm just like well.
Whose fault is that?
366
00:19:45,410 --> 00:19:50,660
Because as far as I know, I
thought I was on track, but it's
367
00:19:50,660 --> 00:19:53,300
just things like that.
I feel like if I could, I
368
00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:55,060
wouldn't, you know, form more
connections.
369
00:19:55,060 --> 00:19:57,180
And if I knew more people then I
would probably, you know,
370
00:19:57,180 --> 00:19:59,620
connect with them more.
So, yeah, go ahead, Hyundai.
371
00:20:00,220 --> 00:20:04,780
You say something important, you
talk about like time or like
372
00:20:04,940 --> 00:20:07,340
sharing that space, like the
physical space.
373
00:20:07,740 --> 00:20:10,980
And I feel like that's a huge
privilege that I had personally.
374
00:20:10,980 --> 00:20:13,420
Like I lived in the dorms my
first two years.
375
00:20:13,540 --> 00:20:17,860
You know, like having that space
of being on campus literally 24
376
00:20:17,860 --> 00:20:21,030
hours a day, you have the time
to go to your dorm, eat
377
00:20:21,030 --> 00:20:23,230
something in the water they set
up, you need the office hours.
378
00:20:23,230 --> 00:20:26,190
Whereas like someone who already
works full time and is a full
379
00:20:26,190 --> 00:20:28,910
time student and then lives off
campus like nothing.
380
00:20:28,910 --> 00:20:31,310
As I said the info, you know,
you're balancing that commute
381
00:20:31,310 --> 00:20:33,230
time.
You're balancing, you know, like
382
00:20:33,590 --> 00:20:36,750
preparing for work, getting
ready, changing or like you know
383
00:20:36,790 --> 00:20:39,390
just a chando gas like see as I
see.
384
00:20:39,390 --> 00:20:42,870
And I feel like that's something
that like honestly I did take
385
00:20:42,870 --> 00:20:45,740
for granted my first two years
because I stopped going to
386
00:20:45,740 --> 00:20:47,900
school during the pandemic.
And then after the pandemic,
387
00:20:47,940 --> 00:20:52,620
I've just been living off campus
And it does take a fucking toll
388
00:20:52,620 --> 00:20:55,580
to stay on campus like the whole
day, you know.
389
00:20:55,940 --> 00:20:59,100
And it's something that like
that you have to like kind of
390
00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:02,060
accommodate your work schedule
like working graveyard shifts or
391
00:21:02,060 --> 00:21:04,460
working early bird shifts.
You know, just to have that
392
00:21:04,460 --> 00:21:06,980
extra flexibility in your, in
your schedule to sort of like,
393
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:12,420
you know, like be you know on
campus and be able to make these
394
00:21:12,460 --> 00:21:14,430
toughest hours.
So like, I feel like there's
395
00:21:14,430 --> 00:21:17,670
something important to like
almost highlight for capos.
396
00:21:17,910 --> 00:21:19,630
Yeah.
If you're not on campus, Como
397
00:21:19,630 --> 00:21:22,310
was a great assess, you know,
when don't you need as a
398
00:21:22,390 --> 00:21:25,430
professor, you know?
But I was like, I'm walking to
399
00:21:25,430 --> 00:21:28,590
the gym, you know, so you know,
I'm also Professor Montica, You
400
00:21:28,590 --> 00:21:32,110
know, like go see as I see that
matters, 'cause it's what, a 5
401
00:21:32,110 --> 00:21:40,190
minute conversation at the end
of conversation'.
402
00:21:43,260 --> 00:21:46,660
I've learned that sending an
e-mail, yeah, it does work, but
403
00:21:46,860 --> 00:21:48,500
only sometimes.
Yeah.
404
00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:51,100
Zero must, you know, just
showing up to the person's
405
00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:55,940
office, just kind of being like
when I prefer sort of like
406
00:21:56,020 --> 00:21:58,300
literally just kind of like
throwing yourself in there.
407
00:21:58,300 --> 00:22:01,420
And that's physical space.
And I feel like that's something
408
00:22:01,420 --> 00:22:05,820
important for like just kind of
like youth to know, you know, to
409
00:22:05,860 --> 00:22:09,380
like stay on campus.
It actually makes a fucking
410
00:22:09,380 --> 00:22:11,660
difference.
You know, like and it's hard and
411
00:22:11,660 --> 00:22:16,980
like you just can't.
But it is important.
412
00:22:18,740 --> 00:22:22,420
Yeah, I didn't sorry, I I didn't
say like at first.
413
00:22:22,420 --> 00:22:27,740
It's like I did, I did have that
like ear nervous to like even
414
00:22:27,940 --> 00:22:31,780
reached out to profile Patricia
for office hours or even profile
415
00:22:31,780 --> 00:22:35,740
via Nueva just to like, you
know, like I wasn't sure how was
416
00:22:35,740 --> 00:22:38,620
it like for the first time, you
know, like I don't want to be
417
00:22:38,620 --> 00:22:42,350
the one to go in there and
interrupt or you know, maybe she
418
00:22:42,350 --> 00:22:45,630
had a student already working
and then I'm not being aware of
419
00:22:45,630 --> 00:22:47,070
that.
So for me it was kind of like,
420
00:22:47,070 --> 00:22:50,910
OK, like I really have to do
send an e-mail and set up an
421
00:22:50,910 --> 00:22:52,670
appointment to like be and meet
up.
422
00:22:52,750 --> 00:22:56,030
And at first it's scary.
But then like, you know once
423
00:22:56,030 --> 00:22:58,910
you're in there, you're you're
you're talking with them.
424
00:22:58,910 --> 00:23:01,710
It's kind of like it's like a
comfortable space where you're
425
00:23:01,710 --> 00:23:04,350
like not only talking about
school wise, but it's kind of
426
00:23:04,350 --> 00:23:06,750
like you're sharing personal
things like things that you may
427
00:23:06,750 --> 00:23:09,510
be going through or just things
that you want to share out.
428
00:23:09,510 --> 00:23:12,820
And it's kind of like now you're
feeling like it's like you're
429
00:23:12,820 --> 00:23:15,420
not, you're not being judged.
You're more like in the state
430
00:23:15,420 --> 00:23:18,140
environment where like you know
there's these are conversations
431
00:23:18,140 --> 00:23:21,780
that you have with your peers
that you can like be comfortable
432
00:23:21,820 --> 00:23:23,340
to share with your professors as
well, so.
433
00:23:23,460 --> 00:23:25,940
Yeah, I think something that
really stood out to me was that
434
00:23:25,940 --> 00:23:30,500
even though that, I mean from my
perspective, even though my
435
00:23:30,500 --> 00:23:33,860
counselor was a move head like
she knew the the background that
436
00:23:33,860 --> 00:23:36,380
I came from, you know, like she
knew the struggle that I was
437
00:23:36,380 --> 00:23:39,460
going through like, you know,
having been undocumented like.
438
00:23:39,850 --> 00:23:42,530
Trying to find resources like,
you know, trying to pay for
439
00:23:42,530 --> 00:23:46,330
school, like making time, having
to work full time, like not
440
00:23:46,330 --> 00:23:48,050
being able to spend too much
time on campus.
441
00:23:48,050 --> 00:23:52,090
Like she understood like where I
was coming from, So for her to
442
00:23:52,090 --> 00:23:56,330
understand that, but also like
back me up and you know, guide
443
00:23:56,330 --> 00:23:58,570
me, you know, different
directions like that, totally
444
00:23:58,570 --> 00:24:00,010
different.
Like totally helped.
445
00:24:00,770 --> 00:24:03,810
It made me feel like she cared,
you know, she cared about me.
446
00:24:03,810 --> 00:24:05,810
You know, she cared about my
education.
447
00:24:06,570 --> 00:24:08,770
She cared about, you know, what
path I was going to.
448
00:24:09,220 --> 00:24:11,860
And you know, the decisions that
I was going to have to make for
449
00:24:11,860 --> 00:24:15,580
the next coming semester or so,
you know, but that's one of the
450
00:24:15,580 --> 00:24:18,060
things that, you know, I feel
like representation,
451
00:24:18,420 --> 00:24:21,500
representation really does
matter because if you if you're
452
00:24:21,500 --> 00:24:25,580
talking to someone and they're
not, they don't understand you
453
00:24:25,580 --> 00:24:29,060
whether it's culturally or like
you know, your background and
454
00:24:29,060 --> 00:24:30,620
stuff like that.
I don't, I don't think you would
455
00:24:30,620 --> 00:24:33,500
get the same feedback that you
would want to to receive from
456
00:24:33,500 --> 00:24:36,020
them, you know.
So that's one of the things
457
00:24:36,020 --> 00:24:38,000
that.
Or I could agree that
458
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:43,160
representation really does
matter, especially on this high
459
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:48,120
level of education where you're
just trying your best to achieve
460
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:50,400
something that for the very
first time.
461
00:24:51,110 --> 00:24:53,910
Some of us are getting the
opportunity to achieve so that
462
00:24:53,910 --> 00:24:56,590
really like it's something that
I'm gonna be grateful for
463
00:24:56,670 --> 00:25:00,390
something else that I have.
What would be like a take away
464
00:25:01,190 --> 00:25:03,510
throughout, you know, the
semesters that we've encountered
465
00:25:03,510 --> 00:25:07,030
as like classmates?
I know y'all took place in the
466
00:25:07,910 --> 00:25:09,710
symposium.
Like, how was that for y'all?
467
00:25:09,710 --> 00:25:12,190
Like how did y'all feel after
that, you know?
468
00:25:12,510 --> 00:25:14,830
The events coming to that like
tell us a little bit about that
469
00:25:14,830 --> 00:25:16,750
because that's important, You
know, that's representation as
470
00:25:16,750 --> 00:25:18,950
well.
So tell us like what you felt
471
00:25:18,950 --> 00:25:21,310
like what you went through your
head like, you know something
472
00:25:21,310 --> 00:25:22,670
very important that.
Yeah.
473
00:25:22,750 --> 00:25:27,070
So for me it was very nervous
research opposing again, I've
474
00:25:27,110 --> 00:25:30,550
never been part of it.
So it was kind of like something
475
00:25:30,550 --> 00:25:34,270
new, definitely something new
for me to, you know, try and
476
00:25:35,110 --> 00:25:37,630
thankfully I had handy, you
know, that was very supportive.
477
00:25:37,630 --> 00:25:40,870
And, you know, they were really,
like encouraging me to, you
478
00:25:40,870 --> 00:25:45,510
know, be part of it with them.
And, you know, just like I feel
479
00:25:45,510 --> 00:25:48,270
like for me, like when I have
friends that encourage me and
480
00:25:48,470 --> 00:25:51,230
that really want me to strive
for something like why not take
481
00:25:51,230 --> 00:25:54,150
a chance, you know, why not go
out there and, you know, take a
482
00:25:54,150 --> 00:25:56,230
shot.
See what, see how it looks.
483
00:25:56,270 --> 00:25:59,390
And even like profile Patricia
was also like, you know, you
484
00:25:59,390 --> 00:26:02,070
should try it out.
You're not the only one that's
485
00:26:02,070 --> 00:26:04,750
gonna go do it.
So for me, I was like, OK, you
486
00:26:04,750 --> 00:26:07,270
know what?
Like I'm a man, so I'm kind of
487
00:26:07,270 --> 00:26:10,150
like representing the male in a
department.
488
00:26:10,150 --> 00:26:12,940
So I kind of don't want to like
not that I want like silly
489
00:26:12,940 --> 00:26:14,700
person.
I want to like back out on this
490
00:26:14,700 --> 00:26:17,380
opportunity maybe I might not
have it again in the future.
491
00:26:18,420 --> 00:26:21,100
So I want like you know somebody
that maybe that looks like me
492
00:26:21,100 --> 00:26:22,940
kind of like take that
advantage.
493
00:26:24,700 --> 00:26:26,260
But again it also with the
capstone, right.
494
00:26:26,700 --> 00:26:29,900
Presented our capstone and you
know like the setting it was
495
00:26:29,900 --> 00:26:33,180
very nice because like you're
getting feedback from like
496
00:26:33,460 --> 00:26:37,060
profile throughout the way your
counselor and just kind of like
497
00:26:37,500 --> 00:26:39,100
you know the whole poster
designing.
498
00:26:39,100 --> 00:26:42,280
And it was kind of very fun
because it's like I was looking
499
00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:45,120
at hundreds Michelle's.
We were all kind of like kind of
500
00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:48,040
like a similar outline template.
And it was like you know what
501
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:51,440
Like it's not like very scary
anymore.
502
00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:53,640
You know it was kind of like
more like we're really like out
503
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:56,160
there.
You know like exposing our work
504
00:26:56,160 --> 00:27:00,200
our research and like and for me
just seeing like well maybe like
505
00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:02,800
like smile the most and like
just happy it was seeing our
506
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:05,920
professors like from the
department showing up supporting
507
00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:07,960
us and like really being there
for us.
508
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:10,160
Because I know like how much
they also like were interested
509
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:13,240
in like as being a part of the
research symposium and you know
510
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:16,640
they were really like admiring
us like to show our research and
511
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:19,440
like show how much we can really
take further our research
512
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,880
throughout the throughout the
higher education and and we were
513
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:24,880
not afraid to do that.
So I feel like that was very
514
00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:26,880
like I came over that will never
forget.
515
00:27:28,240 --> 00:27:35,240
But yeah, like something I took
like pretty much something I'm
516
00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:39,520
taking from solamous thing is
like that I've learned is pretty
517
00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:43,230
much like take up the space, you
know, like make the space yours.
518
00:27:43,230 --> 00:27:47,870
Like #1, not only did you did
you fucking pay for it, but like
519
00:27:48,270 --> 00:27:50,190
you're there and you're not
gonna take up space.
520
00:27:50,190 --> 00:27:54,110
Like, well, dare you, you know,
like, but like that sort of
521
00:27:54,390 --> 00:27:57,910
mentality.
Also like for me, it's always
522
00:27:57,910 --> 00:27:59,590
been like, why isn't there more
of us?
523
00:27:59,870 --> 00:28:01,390
Why isn't there more of us, you
know?
524
00:28:01,870 --> 00:28:05,270
And really, like, for me, I
don't know.
525
00:28:05,270 --> 00:28:08,060
I feel like I'm just kind of
like, I'm kind of sneaky
526
00:28:08,060 --> 00:28:10,820
sometimes because I did it with
intention.
527
00:28:10,820 --> 00:28:13,620
Like, I did it with intention.
Like the people I reached out
528
00:28:13,620 --> 00:28:16,860
to, like it was because of their
research or just because of
529
00:28:16,860 --> 00:28:18,780
their person.
You know, like really, like,
530
00:28:19,740 --> 00:28:23,220
it's hard for us to, you know,
make it and like push ourselves
531
00:28:23,220 --> 00:28:27,220
and like taking, taking, like
participating in those spaces,
532
00:28:27,220 --> 00:28:32,060
you know, it's hard.
You know, like representation
533
00:28:32,060 --> 00:28:34,180
does matter and it's really
fucking important.
534
00:28:34,180 --> 00:28:37,900
And like the way we even like,
set up the tables, I made sure
535
00:28:37,900 --> 00:28:41,260
that we grab the little
tablecloth that said Department
536
00:28:41,260 --> 00:28:44,420
of Chicano Latino Studies.
And then like set up is to make
537
00:28:44,420 --> 00:28:49,380
it like #1 more appealing,
'cause it's like those Gray and
538
00:28:49,380 --> 00:28:52,100
posters were white.
I was like this is boring like
539
00:28:52,100 --> 00:28:56,180
gentrification bias and just
kind of like adding some corrod
540
00:28:56,300 --> 00:29:00,180
and like well, we got comments
of like y'all's table really
541
00:29:00,180 --> 00:29:03,460
stood out or like y'all y'all
had a really nice table.
542
00:29:03,540 --> 00:29:06,330
But it was like the intention
was for you ought to see that
543
00:29:07,250 --> 00:29:10,090
our kudura exists.
Our Kudura is research.
544
00:29:10,090 --> 00:29:13,850
You know, like we are scholars.
You know, because like what's
545
00:29:13,850 --> 00:29:16,970
the dominant narrative like even
still like yeah Trump's not in
546
00:29:16,970 --> 00:29:19,010
office.
But like there's so much racist
547
00:29:19,010 --> 00:29:23,450
rhetoric and really like of
people of color like darker skin
548
00:29:23,450 --> 00:29:27,410
tone people of color.
Like there's so much like just
549
00:29:27,410 --> 00:29:30,450
like stereotypes, you know.
And I feel like just kind of
550
00:29:30,450 --> 00:29:33,140
representing and putting in your
money out there and like, you
551
00:29:33,140 --> 00:29:35,780
know, taking that risk of, like,
I don't know what mess I'm
552
00:29:35,780 --> 00:29:38,340
getting into.
But I keep thinking, Heyman,
553
00:29:38,340 --> 00:29:40,220
we're both gonna learn this mess
together.
554
00:29:40,220 --> 00:29:42,780
You know, Like, I feel like
that's really just kind of what
555
00:29:42,780 --> 00:29:45,340
keeps you going, 'cause like,
there was many times where I was
556
00:29:45,340 --> 00:29:47,980
just like, I'm done.
I don't wanna do this anymore.
557
00:29:47,980 --> 00:29:50,700
But, like, just kind of like
hearing Hyman being with Hyman
558
00:29:50,700 --> 00:29:53,540
is just kind of like the mutual
motivation that we gave each
559
00:29:53,540 --> 00:29:55,180
other of.
Like, OK, yeah.
560
00:29:55,180 --> 00:29:58,220
But let's just work on it for
like 30 minutes or, you know,
561
00:29:58,220 --> 00:30:00,460
let's just kind of sit down and
talk about it out loud.
562
00:30:00,940 --> 00:30:02,700
And, yeah, it was definitely a
journey.
563
00:30:02,700 --> 00:30:05,740
But like, for me, it's always
been like, pick up that space,
564
00:30:05,740 --> 00:30:07,700
you know?
And like, for me, it was just
565
00:30:07,700 --> 00:30:10,180
kind of like, I'm there and I'm
going to cheese me out with the
566
00:30:10,180 --> 00:30:11,940
hint there.
Like, I'm about to tell you all
567
00:30:11,940 --> 00:30:13,180
the cheeseman that I'd learned.
You know?
568
00:30:13,180 --> 00:30:16,180
Like, for me, it's just kind of
like, and that's how I kind of
569
00:30:16,180 --> 00:30:19,100
talk like, yeah, I do research.
But really, I'm trying to get
570
00:30:19,100 --> 00:30:20,780
the dirt.
I'm trying to get the cheeseman
571
00:30:20,780 --> 00:30:22,500
of all this, you know?
And I want to share that with
572
00:30:22,540 --> 00:30:24,140
you.
So it's pretty cool.
573
00:30:24,140 --> 00:30:27,820
And because, yeah, I don't know,
it took a minute to get there.
574
00:30:27,820 --> 00:30:30,380
And, like, there was a lot of
learning curves.
575
00:30:30,500 --> 00:30:33,530
They don't definitely worth it.
Yeah, I think the outcome is
576
00:30:33,530 --> 00:30:36,170
like very new experience for the
very first time and knowing that
577
00:30:36,170 --> 00:30:39,290
you did very well, like you
know, congratulations to you
578
00:30:39,290 --> 00:30:41,850
both.
You know, cuz not a lot of
579
00:30:41,850 --> 00:30:45,010
people like Y'all said, showed
up to to be able to like, you
580
00:30:45,010 --> 00:30:47,890
know, show that off and you
know, put into place like
581
00:30:47,890 --> 00:30:50,650
everything that they have been
working on for maybe more than
582
00:30:50,650 --> 00:30:53,360
one semester, so.
You know, congratulations to
583
00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:55,680
both of you and you all
represented us very well.
584
00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,720
But yeah, I.
Just want to kind of jump into
585
00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:04,080
the questions that Andre had and
we're just you know primarily
586
00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:07,560
the speaking from our Cals
department from the very few
587
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:11,200
Chicanos that you know or male
Chicanos as well that we're in
588
00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:13,040
our department.
So you know, the very first
589
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:17,220
question is.
What speaks to the future kind
590
00:31:17,220 --> 00:31:19,460
of graduates in the department?
Was it cows?
591
00:31:19,540 --> 00:31:22,620
Was it Sonoma State University?
Or is it gender, cultural
592
00:31:22,620 --> 00:31:24,900
responsibilities that society
imposes?
593
00:31:24,900 --> 00:31:28,540
Are men not recruited or do they
not make it to graduation?
594
00:31:28,540 --> 00:31:29,620
So what do you all think about
that?
595
00:31:29,700 --> 00:31:31,540
Can I give some context to this
real quick?
596
00:31:33,540 --> 00:31:37,820
Is the these questions are
coming from a place of like me
597
00:31:37,820 --> 00:31:40,940
personally as a non binary like
trans person.
598
00:31:41,460 --> 00:31:45,410
I see, like the gender
disparities and number one, I
599
00:31:45,410 --> 00:31:49,410
also see the way we don't talk
much about gender in a diverse
600
00:31:49,410 --> 00:31:54,330
way, 'cause of what they see.
And doing the readings regarding
601
00:31:54,330 --> 00:31:58,050
this topic, 'cause I did some
readings, really added a whole
602
00:31:58,050 --> 00:32:02,290
other perspective of, like,
gender dialogue and specifically
603
00:32:02,290 --> 00:32:04,610
like, it's just.
But when this came, 'cause I
604
00:32:04,610 --> 00:32:07,570
took the graduation pictures and
when I was going through the
605
00:32:07,570 --> 00:32:11,200
pictures, I was seeing like I
was looking for the men, I was
606
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:12,960
like, OK, where's the masculine
gender at?
607
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:16,040
Alright, I see my girl, I see my
mukit is alright, buddy.
608
00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:18,320
Where the home is, you know,
like where where the guys at?
609
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:23,360
And like literally it was just
chewy find me and again and I
610
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:25,520
was just like, damn, that's
really it.
611
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:28,560
Like, that's really it, you
know?
612
00:32:28,560 --> 00:32:31,800
And, like, it really kind of
like, it really disappointed me
613
00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:35,800
because I'm just like, yo, like
what happened for the Tony be
614
00:32:36,150 --> 00:32:38,230
three men on the graduation line
this spring.
615
00:32:38,230 --> 00:32:42,710
You know, like were they not
recruiting or, you know, where
616
00:32:42,910 --> 00:32:45,310
is the institution not helping
them do they just even don't
617
00:32:45,710 --> 00:32:47,070
like, are they recruited?
But they don't make it to
618
00:32:47,070 --> 00:32:48,830
graduation.
So that's just kind of where the
619
00:32:48,830 --> 00:32:51,390
questions came from.
And I and I hope that gave y'all
620
00:32:51,390 --> 00:32:53,550
time to think.
But yeah, these are mainly
621
00:32:53,550 --> 00:32:56,470
questions that are like, I'm
just like, is no one else seeing
622
00:32:56,470 --> 00:32:58,390
this?
Why is nobody else talking about
623
00:32:58,390 --> 00:32:59,670
this?
Yeah.
624
00:32:59,750 --> 00:33:04,260
For me, it was kind of like Dad,
just see Chuy and Miguel and me,
625
00:33:04,460 --> 00:33:06,620
then the department, it was kind
of like trying to figure out,
626
00:33:06,620 --> 00:33:09,060
like at first it was kind of
like questioning like, am I
627
00:33:09,060 --> 00:33:13,540
really being represented right?
Is it the professors that are
628
00:33:13,540 --> 00:33:15,740
not really recruiting a lot of
men?
629
00:33:16,100 --> 00:33:18,660
But at the same time, it's kind
of like, I don't know what it
630
00:33:18,660 --> 00:33:21,340
was tough because I wasn't like
I didn't want to leave.
631
00:33:21,340 --> 00:33:24,300
Obviously I was already being
very supportive by my peers and
632
00:33:24,300 --> 00:33:26,620
you guys, you know, like.
But I also wanted to make sure
633
00:33:26,620 --> 00:33:28,060
that like, everyone was
included.
634
00:33:28,380 --> 00:33:32,180
So even if it was just me and
Chuy Miguel, like hopefully,
635
00:33:32,180 --> 00:33:34,820
like we all like, thought that
like we were really like
636
00:33:34,820 --> 00:33:36,540
impacted by you guys and the
professors.
637
00:33:36,540 --> 00:33:38,980
Like we never felt like we were
excluded and being in those
638
00:33:38,980 --> 00:33:42,020
spaces.
And I feel like, yeah, it's it
639
00:33:42,020 --> 00:33:44,740
sucks to have like not a lot of
men like us were not filling up
640
00:33:44,740 --> 00:33:48,860
those classes, like with us.
It kind of brings you like, you
641
00:33:48,860 --> 00:33:52,460
know, like why is it, you know,
why is it like, is it because do
642
00:33:52,460 --> 00:33:55,060
people think that like other
majors are better than us?
643
00:33:55,060 --> 00:33:57,300
Which really I don't think at
all because I feel like you
644
00:33:57,300 --> 00:34:00,420
personally have to be in that
space to figure out what you
645
00:34:00,970 --> 00:34:04,130
take out from it.
And like, I feel like a lot of
646
00:34:04,130 --> 00:34:07,890
men should really be like, you
know, like spread the word out
647
00:34:07,890 --> 00:34:09,929
and by like the institution as
well.
648
00:34:09,929 --> 00:34:11,650
You know, definitely like they
should have.
649
00:34:12,330 --> 00:34:14,810
They should really like be
stepping in and like supporting
650
00:34:14,850 --> 00:34:17,170
like department, especially
because we are really a small
651
00:34:17,170 --> 00:34:18,810
department.
And I feel like I think that's
652
00:34:18,810 --> 00:34:20,650
one of the one of the reasons
why there's not a lot of men.
653
00:34:21,250 --> 00:34:23,290
And I feel like that's that's
when the recruitment just
654
00:34:23,290 --> 00:34:25,650
started happening.
But again, yeah, like it's, it's
655
00:34:25,650 --> 00:34:27,489
it's really like a yeah, it's
kind of a tough question to
656
00:34:27,489 --> 00:34:29,620
think about.
But also that I I just wanted to
657
00:34:29,620 --> 00:34:31,980
highlight that like, yeah, like,
yeah, I just, I I definitely,
658
00:34:31,980 --> 00:34:34,380
like felt like I was very
supportive, even if it was just
659
00:34:34,380 --> 00:34:35,340
me.
Again.
660
00:34:35,340 --> 00:34:37,820
Me, Chuy and Miguel and I feel
like they can say the same thing
661
00:34:37,820 --> 00:34:39,340
too.
Like they were never like laws
662
00:34:39,340 --> 00:34:41,860
because I know they were always
like with us and they were
663
00:34:41,860 --> 00:34:43,620
supportive.
And we we talked to each other.
664
00:34:43,620 --> 00:34:45,460
We had late night sessions like
us three.
665
00:34:45,820 --> 00:34:48,380
I remember going to the quiet,
quiet library session.
666
00:34:48,380 --> 00:34:50,620
Like we we know.
We talk about, you know, our
667
00:34:50,620 --> 00:34:53,620
struggles, our goals and like
how we're doing it in our
668
00:34:53,620 --> 00:34:55,139
classes.
Even when we had a class
669
00:34:55,139 --> 00:34:57,340
together, we were talking about
what, what are the readings?
670
00:34:57,340 --> 00:34:58,540
Like what, what's the homework
like?
671
00:34:58,540 --> 00:35:02,700
So like, you know, it was never
like one of us just being by
672
00:35:02,700 --> 00:35:05,940
ourselves And like it's kind of
like us collectively, like just
673
00:35:06,020 --> 00:35:08,660
coming together and like and
just being super close to each
674
00:35:08,660 --> 00:35:11,380
other and just making sure we
kept that relationship
675
00:35:11,620 --> 00:35:15,820
friendship as close as possible.
Because I know like, again, it's
676
00:35:15,900 --> 00:35:18,940
it's it's between us and and the
department, like they know so
677
00:35:18,940 --> 00:35:21,180
much, but also like where is the
institution at?
678
00:35:21,340 --> 00:35:22,500
How come they're not doing it as
much?
679
00:35:22,820 --> 00:35:24,540
Yeah, I guess I could say the
same.
680
00:35:25,290 --> 00:35:28,010
Since as far as I can remember
like since the beginning of you
681
00:35:28,010 --> 00:35:31,330
know, stepping foot on campus
like and attending classes like
682
00:35:32,250 --> 00:35:35,930
it was always filled with a lot
of mojeres and at at first it
683
00:35:35,930 --> 00:35:39,570
was kind of like.
I was just kind of taking
684
00:35:39,570 --> 00:35:41,850
everything in from their
perspective, you know, because
685
00:35:41,850 --> 00:35:44,210
there was topics that we were
talking about like, you know,
686
00:35:44,210 --> 00:35:49,130
how come men are acting this way
or or women do this and do that,
687
00:35:49,130 --> 00:35:52,860
so.
A lot of it culturally based and
688
00:35:52,860 --> 00:35:55,540
you know respected as well from
everybody's thoughts that you
689
00:35:55,540 --> 00:35:59,340
know had to have said throughout
the classroom experience.
690
00:36:00,940 --> 00:36:04,140
And then again you know we go
back to at the end of the our
691
00:36:04,140 --> 00:36:06,780
graduation like you're we're
down to like three men.
692
00:36:06,780 --> 00:36:11,300
You know I don't think I've, I
don't know at first it was like
693
00:36:11,420 --> 00:36:13,300
it wasn't weird.
It was just like, Dang, we need
694
00:36:13,300 --> 00:36:16,890
more like men in here, but.
We ended up with you know us
695
00:36:16,890 --> 00:36:19,610
three and you know I could you
know you can literally count on
696
00:36:19,610 --> 00:36:23,450
your fingers how many of us were
there to to cross that stage.
697
00:36:23,930 --> 00:36:29,850
It's the I think also like it's
kind of a given that you know
698
00:36:30,570 --> 00:36:35,050
males are not really getting up
there with graduation
699
00:36:35,050 --> 00:36:37,450
requirements like you know with
their counterparts you know
700
00:36:37,450 --> 00:36:39,810
women.
So it there's there has to be a
701
00:36:39,810 --> 00:36:42,250
factor that's very difficult to
understand, very difficult to
702
00:36:42,250 --> 00:36:45,630
achieve whether it's.
You know, not having to obtain a
703
00:36:45,630 --> 00:36:50,830
four year degree but also
getting like a certificate for
704
00:36:50,870 --> 00:36:54,150
for different jobs.
You know, I I feel like as a
705
00:36:54,150 --> 00:36:58,270
society, you know, you know,
coming from the Latino
706
00:36:58,270 --> 00:37:01,550
perspective, like we suffer a
lot of like machismo, thought
707
00:37:01,590 --> 00:37:04,790
you know, you know, you have to
get a job, you have to work, you
708
00:37:04,790 --> 00:37:07,110
have to gain, you have to do
this, you have to do that.
709
00:37:07,510 --> 00:37:10,430
So maybe for someone going to
school like oh, you're not doing
710
00:37:10,430 --> 00:37:11,790
nothing, you know, what are you
doing for yourself?
711
00:37:11,790 --> 00:37:13,150
You know, what are you doing for
your family?
712
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:15,760
I feel like it's at some point
like I had to think about that
713
00:37:15,760 --> 00:37:17,880
like damn, was school really
like the best option for me,
714
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:20,800
Like, you know, and I was doing
that by myself, like I was
715
00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:24,560
carrying on by myself.
So just kind of having that
716
00:37:24,560 --> 00:37:28,640
perspective and being like
damned, you know, this really
717
00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:30,520
where I belong.
Like you kind of feel like left
718
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:32,960
out of place.
But it was, you know, you find
719
00:37:32,960 --> 00:37:34,360
connections within the
classroom.
720
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:37,560
You know, like we found each
other and you know, very, you
721
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:40,920
know, we connected very good and
you know, throughout the whole
722
00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:42,600
like semester and everything
else like.
723
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:45,680
To be able to rely on our
experiences, you know, on our
724
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:48,640
topics, to be able to as they
come together and you know,
725
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:52,280
continue to, to finish our
assignments, you know, continue
726
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:55,440
to push through through whatever
it was that we had to get
727
00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:58,360
through together.
So that was kind of like a big
728
00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:01,720
take away for me too.
But something that like Hamid
729
00:38:01,720 --> 00:38:07,000
kind of touched up on was the
major itself and like to put
730
00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,480
this out there, like out of the
people who graduated and kind of
731
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:11,000
like walked with the little
Gubito.
732
00:38:11,500 --> 00:38:13,580
It was less than 20.
And I almost want to say it was
733
00:38:13,580 --> 00:38:18,380
like about 16 people.
And those 16 people, you know,
734
00:38:18,380 --> 00:38:23,820
three were men.
And the major itself, like, you
735
00:38:23,820 --> 00:38:27,700
know, studies, it is like a
history major that like falls
736
00:38:27,700 --> 00:38:30,500
under the parts of humanities,
like, you know, umbrella.
737
00:38:32,340 --> 00:38:38,740
And I feel like it's often, I
don't know, oftentimes many
738
00:38:39,060 --> 00:38:41,650
cows.
The cause major is often seen as
739
00:38:41,650 --> 00:38:43,210
like, well, you just want to be
a teacher.
740
00:38:44,730 --> 00:38:48,770
And oftentimes like the
understanding of like the career
741
00:38:48,770 --> 00:38:52,650
of a teacher is so gendered.
You know, it's like, well, like,
742
00:38:53,250 --> 00:38:56,170
you know, like girls are teacher
muketas are teachers And like
743
00:38:56,170 --> 00:39:00,410
because like again that like
gendered norm of well, if you're
744
00:39:00,410 --> 00:39:02,370
a man, you've got to work a
different type of job.
745
00:39:02,370 --> 00:39:05,610
You know something in business
or something more like manual
746
00:39:05,610 --> 00:39:08,210
labor.
And it's something that like
747
00:39:08,250 --> 00:39:10,340
kind of touched up on like is it
the major?
748
00:39:10,340 --> 00:39:14,740
It's up to people not like don't
want to like, you know, go into
749
00:39:14,740 --> 00:39:18,340
the major, but just like
thinking about it like there's
750
00:39:18,340 --> 00:39:22,140
so many like historical names
and figures who are men with and
751
00:39:22,140 --> 00:39:25,940
that you kind of movement.
So it's like why are why are our
752
00:39:25,940 --> 00:39:29,820
numbers so low?
That'll kind of like going into,
753
00:39:29,820 --> 00:39:32,020
I guess like one of my
questions, like, where do you,
754
00:39:32,060 --> 00:39:34,780
where do you see these men?
Like, you know, like where can
755
00:39:34,780 --> 00:39:37,340
you find men of color on campus?
Because you said, like you walk
756
00:39:37,340 --> 00:39:41,300
around like it's majority women,
majority white, when then you
757
00:39:41,300 --> 00:39:44,860
know, like there's also a thing
better than me and you know,
758
00:39:44,900 --> 00:39:48,620
like where do you like, you know
that connection with other men
759
00:39:48,620 --> 00:39:52,860
And this is a question for you.
Well, I feel like every now and
760
00:39:52,860 --> 00:39:56,380
then just walking on campus, you
know, you find, you know,
761
00:39:56,420 --> 00:40:00,140
fraternities, you know, I feel
like, and most of the time like
762
00:40:00,140 --> 00:40:03,020
they were made-up of, like white
men also.
763
00:40:03,020 --> 00:40:06,460
But you see, like every now and
then, like a speck of brown in
764
00:40:06,460 --> 00:40:07,740
there, you know?
And you're just like, damn,
765
00:40:07,740 --> 00:40:09,060
dude.
You're with us, you know, but
766
00:40:09,650 --> 00:40:11,810
they're not with us, you know?
So it was like, oh, shit, that's
767
00:40:11,810 --> 00:40:15,090
kind of awkward.
But I don't know, just like
768
00:40:15,090 --> 00:40:18,090
there have been times where like
you walk in front of their, they
769
00:40:18,130 --> 00:40:20,530
usually have, like, I don't
know, they usually would table
770
00:40:20,530 --> 00:40:23,850
to kind of recruit people.
And I, you know, personally
771
00:40:23,850 --> 00:40:27,290
remember walking in front of
them and it was like if nobody
772
00:40:27,290 --> 00:40:30,530
ever walked in front of them,
you know, I would always ask
773
00:40:30,530 --> 00:40:33,810
myself, like, I knew, like, I
don't, I don't ever want to be
774
00:40:33,810 --> 00:40:35,850
part of, you know, whatever they
got going on or whatever.
775
00:40:35,850 --> 00:40:39,790
But just kind of like curious
like why aren't you asking me,
776
00:40:40,270 --> 00:40:43,470
Like this is the third time I
walked by here and I haven't
777
00:40:43,470 --> 00:40:48,070
gotten a flyer or like AT shirt,
you know, I don't know, not
778
00:40:48,070 --> 00:40:49,750
Paletta.
You know, it's just like stuff
779
00:40:49,750 --> 00:40:53,070
like that.
Like I was never asked to like
780
00:40:53,070 --> 00:40:55,750
throw a pie at someone's face.
Like I don't know.
781
00:40:55,750 --> 00:40:59,510
It's just like you know, you
kind of see that perspective at
782
00:41:00,110 --> 00:41:02,550
predominantly white institution
and so.
783
00:41:03,050 --> 00:41:06,370
It goes back to the very few
times that I was on campus.
784
00:41:06,810 --> 00:41:10,690
Most of these men of color were
probably hitting the gym or
785
00:41:11,690 --> 00:41:15,250
attending a sports event
practicing.
786
00:41:16,370 --> 00:41:18,410
But again, it wasn't really
like.
787
00:41:19,290 --> 00:41:21,930
I really didn't see them in
classrooms that I was taking and
788
00:41:21,930 --> 00:41:24,450
if they were like it was very,
very few of them.
789
00:41:24,450 --> 00:41:27,650
So kind of says a lot about, you
know, being able to, sorry, try
790
00:41:27,650 --> 00:41:30,410
to connect with other people and
trying to grow that as well, so.
791
00:41:30,450 --> 00:41:33,570
Yeah, actually, you touched
about fraternities.
792
00:41:34,010 --> 00:41:35,650
That's really true.
Because, like, that's lately
793
00:41:35,650 --> 00:41:38,210
what my research was about, like
how like there's so many
794
00:41:38,210 --> 00:41:40,210
fraternities that like, they
have their own rituals, they
795
00:41:40,210 --> 00:41:43,650
have their own, like, set of
beliefs for like, like, yeah,
796
00:41:43,650 --> 00:41:46,610
like I was like people of color,
men of color, brown man and
797
00:41:46,650 --> 00:41:49,290
black like.
You know, it's they the ones
798
00:41:49,290 --> 00:41:52,690
that are faced the most like,
you know, this negative
799
00:41:52,690 --> 00:41:56,330
stereotype of like who gets
chosen, who gets reached upon.
800
00:41:56,330 --> 00:41:58,650
You know, like who can get
included.
801
00:41:58,650 --> 00:42:01,050
You know, like it's kind of
like, you know, like I thought
802
00:42:01,050 --> 00:42:03,890
fraternities, all fraternities
should be meant to like include
803
00:42:03,890 --> 00:42:05,490
everybody.
Like you know how they include
804
00:42:05,490 --> 00:42:08,890
diversity and if there's and
then if there's diversity like
805
00:42:09,290 --> 00:42:12,530
where's everybody in that group
you know could because if you
806
00:42:12,530 --> 00:42:15,210
only see one race and then you
kind of like.
807
00:42:15,750 --> 00:42:18,430
And get like, OK, you guys are
claiming like diverse, but I
808
00:42:18,430 --> 00:42:22,190
don't see a diverse there, you
know, and it's kind of like it
809
00:42:22,190 --> 00:42:25,470
kind of brings you the questions
of like, you know, like I only
810
00:42:25,470 --> 00:42:29,190
see like maybe one that looks
just like me, but how come I
811
00:42:29,190 --> 00:42:33,670
only see one where there's only
like 7 that are like white and
812
00:42:34,070 --> 00:42:38,350
two that are like, you know, men
of color, like, you know, so
813
00:42:38,350 --> 00:42:41,950
it's kind of like, you know,
it's kind of like how do I fit
814
00:42:41,950 --> 00:42:44,710
myself in these type of groups
where I want to do all these?
815
00:42:45,390 --> 00:42:49,510
Connectivities represent my
culture, my ethnicity, my race.
816
00:42:49,830 --> 00:42:53,950
And also do like you have good
curriculum, but then when you
817
00:42:53,950 --> 00:42:56,870
have like you know these
standards that are being placed
818
00:42:56,870 --> 00:43:02,990
by your group, you know, how
does that make you, how does
819
00:43:02,990 --> 00:43:04,950
that make you look especially
like in higher Ed.
820
00:43:04,950 --> 00:43:07,990
You know like are you
representing the right way or
821
00:43:07,990 --> 00:43:10,990
you know it's and it's really,
it's really hard to like connect
822
00:43:11,070 --> 00:43:13,990
with like that with like a man
especially just because.
823
00:43:14,740 --> 00:43:16,860
It also ties into that mass
masculinity, right?
824
00:43:16,980 --> 00:43:21,580
That machismo man just having
to, you know, telling you how
825
00:43:21,580 --> 00:43:23,420
you should behave, how you
should treat people.
826
00:43:24,860 --> 00:43:28,660
But at the end of the day, you
know you like any man like or
827
00:43:28,660 --> 00:43:32,740
just understand that, like, you
know, the mature ones know that,
828
00:43:32,740 --> 00:43:35,380
like, you know it's always going
to be mutual respect no matter
829
00:43:35,380 --> 00:43:39,020
who it is, right?
And I feel like we just have to
830
00:43:39,020 --> 00:43:42,260
understand that like like it's
kind of like.
831
00:43:43,090 --> 00:43:45,690
I want to be in a group that is
accepting everybody, not just
832
00:43:46,290 --> 00:43:49,050
one certain race or the other,
you know?
833
00:43:49,130 --> 00:43:51,730
Because if it's just gonna be
like that, then like, how are we
834
00:43:51,730 --> 00:43:54,490
gonna move forward to have, like
a good representation in the
835
00:43:54,490 --> 00:43:56,530
fraternity, Like Greek life
especially?
836
00:43:56,530 --> 00:43:58,850
Yeah, No.
Yeah, I feel like it's more of.
837
00:43:59,690 --> 00:44:02,890
It kind of like we go back to
like feeling left out, you know,
838
00:44:02,890 --> 00:44:07,090
sometimes because you know it
would be I guess for others like
839
00:44:07,850 --> 00:44:10,050
you know, they would want to be
some like part of something like
840
00:44:10,050 --> 00:44:12,610
that just to be more connected
within the.
841
00:44:13,100 --> 00:44:17,060
The campus life, yeah, I would
say, you know, but you know,
842
00:44:17,140 --> 00:44:21,220
there we go again.
Like, I never really saw like
843
00:44:21,220 --> 00:44:25,460
fraternities of color as much as
when I saw like white
844
00:44:25,460 --> 00:44:28,460
fraternities, you know, So just
kind of, I guess they need to do
845
00:44:28,460 --> 00:44:30,940
a little bit more outreach, I
guess more representation for
846
00:44:30,940 --> 00:44:33,180
sure.
And you know, we have other
847
00:44:33,180 --> 00:44:37,220
organizations like Mecha.
You know, we could just, you
848
00:44:37,220 --> 00:44:40,260
know, talk about Mecha.
Sonoma is making a big comeback
849
00:44:40,260 --> 00:44:43,130
on campus for sure.
They had their big event.
850
00:44:43,130 --> 00:44:45,250
They had a bila night and it
was, it turned out pretty good.
851
00:44:45,290 --> 00:44:48,370
You know I heard.
So we need more things like that
852
00:44:48,370 --> 00:44:52,010
that can cool tree be able to
express ourselves to be able to
853
00:44:52,010 --> 00:44:54,250
you don't just form more
connections, you know form more,
854
00:44:54,610 --> 00:44:59,090
more, you know interactions with
you know your fellow classmates
855
00:44:59,090 --> 00:45:01,930
and you know people on campus
that you know could be working
856
00:45:01,930 --> 00:45:04,010
in a different department and
could help you with maybe
857
00:45:04,010 --> 00:45:06,490
financial aid or you know
getting in contact with
858
00:45:06,490 --> 00:45:08,530
something that you want to do or
someone that you want to meet.
859
00:45:08,530 --> 00:45:11,420
So.
That's a very important side of
860
00:45:11,420 --> 00:45:13,700
networking that we could use to
our benefit.
861
00:45:13,740 --> 00:45:17,620
So how does this connect to
imposter syndrome and belonging
862
00:45:17,620 --> 00:45:20,500
on campus back to support
systems, mental health and
863
00:45:20,500 --> 00:45:23,260
graduating?
So what could we say about that?
864
00:45:23,260 --> 00:45:27,660
Cuz I know for sure whenever I
was not taking Cal's classes and
865
00:45:27,660 --> 00:45:29,340
I was taking other classes as
well.
866
00:45:30,300 --> 00:45:34,460
I felt very isolating and like I
was taking a woman in gender
867
00:45:34,460 --> 00:45:37,140
studies class.
Majority of the people there
868
00:45:37,140 --> 00:45:40,860
were mainly white.
And so I remember like speaking
869
00:45:40,860 --> 00:45:43,420
from a personal perspective
like, oh, you know, I grew up,
870
00:45:43,820 --> 00:45:46,820
you know, both my parents.
My father has always worked on
871
00:45:46,820 --> 00:45:49,300
the fields, like my mother is a
stay at home mom.
872
00:45:49,300 --> 00:45:51,620
Like that's just a job within
itself too.
873
00:45:52,230 --> 00:45:54,510
But I feel like, you know, aside
from that, like whenever I would
874
00:45:54,510 --> 00:45:56,910
talk about like my personal
experiences or like things that
875
00:45:56,910 --> 00:45:59,350
I have gone through in my life,
everybody was just like, damn,
876
00:45:59,350 --> 00:46:02,190
like it feels like I'm like
you're in a movie or something,
877
00:46:02,190 --> 00:46:03,950
you know, Like I don't know how
to explain it.
878
00:46:03,950 --> 00:46:06,190
Like it was just like something
that they've never heard of.
879
00:46:06,190 --> 00:46:09,310
Like I, I, you know, I would
tell people like back in before
880
00:46:09,310 --> 00:46:11,750
my freshman year, like I got
jumped by a gang like, you know,
881
00:46:11,750 --> 00:46:14,230
out of something that was, you
know, I was never involved with
882
00:46:14,230 --> 00:46:16,600
any games or anything.
It was just like a thing that
883
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:19,160
happened, you know, the and
people were like, holy shit, you
884
00:46:19,160 --> 00:46:21,080
gotta jump by a gang member.
Like, you know, our game.
885
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:22,920
And I'm just like, yeah, you
know, like it happens, you know,
886
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:25,520
it's just things you grow up
while being brown, you know?
887
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:26,960
And people would just be like,
what the hell?
888
00:46:26,960 --> 00:46:29,360
Like, how are you still here?
Like, you know why you're not
889
00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:31,760
like this is just not the scene
for this stuff kind of stuff.
890
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:34,680
You know, when you talk about
personal perspectives like that,
891
00:46:34,720 --> 00:46:36,760
you know, personal experience
like that, people don't really
892
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:38,800
tend to be like, holy shit, like
that's that's real.
893
00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:40,320
Like that could happen to
someone you know.
894
00:46:40,880 --> 00:46:42,600
Because I feel like a lot of
people are like in that little
895
00:46:42,600 --> 00:46:46,200
show where they haven't
experienced like specific you
896
00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:50,120
know, instances where that has
happened, you know, whereas in
897
00:46:50,120 --> 00:46:53,760
like my case like I have always
gone around like phrase, I've
898
00:46:53,760 --> 00:46:56,520
always gone around like tension.
I've always gone around like
899
00:46:56,680 --> 00:47:00,080
culturally expression expressing
myself and also seeing others
900
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:01,960
culture express themselves as
well.
901
00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:03,560
So for me that was like a big
thing.
902
00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:05,920
It's nothing new to me, like,
you know.
903
00:47:06,330 --> 00:47:08,290
Coming from that kind of
background, like it's just
904
00:47:08,290 --> 00:47:10,490
another day, you know, it's just
another thing for me, But for
905
00:47:10,490 --> 00:47:11,770
other people was like a big
shock.
906
00:47:11,770 --> 00:47:13,130
It's like a big, you know,
surprise.
907
00:47:13,130 --> 00:47:15,810
Like, I feel like those are just
things that would need to be set
908
00:47:15,810 --> 00:47:19,690
out there just to kind of, you
know, see where someone else is
909
00:47:19,690 --> 00:47:23,250
coming from, see where someone
else is speaking from to be able
910
00:47:23,250 --> 00:47:24,890
to, like better understand them,
you know?
911
00:47:25,330 --> 00:47:27,410
It's crazy.
Thank you for changing.
912
00:47:27,410 --> 00:47:28,930
Yeah.
Also like, you know, like, I'm
913
00:47:28,970 --> 00:47:31,810
also like, I was just like you
this this past semester.
914
00:47:32,290 --> 00:47:36,130
I was telling Honey like I'm in
the class History 252.
915
00:47:36,610 --> 00:47:39,970
And like compared to like what
other class classes like this
916
00:47:39,970 --> 00:47:43,770
class was like it was really
scary because like one, I had to
917
00:47:43,770 --> 00:47:45,570
pass this class even to walk on
the stage.
918
00:47:46,090 --> 00:47:49,370
But two is just because this is
a class that like is all why you
919
00:47:49,370 --> 00:47:52,730
know, it's what do you call it
like upper division, like part
920
00:47:52,730 --> 00:47:54,610
of the curriculum that that I
needed to take.
921
00:47:54,610 --> 00:47:56,970
And like it's like you
transition to a whole different
922
00:47:56,970 --> 00:48:00,290
new environment, new space.
It's kind of like a new bubble
923
00:48:00,290 --> 00:48:03,130
where like you don't see people
that look like you and.
924
00:48:03,440 --> 00:48:05,120
Like, you're not seeing the
friends that you connected with
925
00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:07,480
from the college department,
'cause like, you're seeing new,
926
00:48:07,520 --> 00:48:09,560
new, new students.
And it's just kind of like,
927
00:48:09,720 --> 00:48:11,920
like, kind of like there was
like a culture shock there for
928
00:48:11,920 --> 00:48:13,640
me, for me.
But just because, you know,
929
00:48:13,640 --> 00:48:16,800
like, I would, I didn't know at
first like how the class was
930
00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:18,320
gonna be like until like the
first day.
931
00:48:18,320 --> 00:48:21,600
Like, I remember I was just
looking around to see who, who
932
00:48:21,600 --> 00:48:22,960
was in the class with me like
that.
933
00:48:22,960 --> 00:48:24,840
I know.
And I didn't see anyone,
934
00:48:24,840 --> 00:48:26,040
especially in the college
department.
935
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:29,080
So it was kind of like, very
nervous for me.
936
00:48:29,080 --> 00:48:31,760
And I was just like, Oh my God,
Like, like, like a little panic
937
00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:32,800
attack, I guess you could say
like.
938
00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:36,160
Like, how am I even going to
like go this whole semester, you
939
00:48:36,160 --> 00:48:39,920
know, being in this class but
and then like just reaching out
940
00:48:39,920 --> 00:48:43,040
to like profile and, like go
into office, office about it.
941
00:48:43,040 --> 00:48:45,400
Like, you know, telling how,
like how I felt that class.
942
00:48:45,400 --> 00:48:48,360
You know, she even asked me
like, you know, like what's
943
00:48:48,360 --> 00:48:50,600
something that, like, the
teacher has taught you, like,
944
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:52,800
what do you like?
What do you observe when you're
945
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:54,640
in that room?
Like, what are the questions
946
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:55,880
that you have in mind?
It's kind of like, you know,
947
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,480
it's like kind of like she's
like your therapist in the way,
948
00:48:58,480 --> 00:48:59,880
but the same time, so she's kind
of like.
949
00:49:00,870 --> 00:49:02,790
She wants to make sure like
you're you're doing good and
950
00:49:02,790 --> 00:49:06,630
you're like actually, like not
just there and like feeling like
951
00:49:06,630 --> 00:49:09,710
you're so lonely in the way.
Like, I had to reach, Like the
952
00:49:09,710 --> 00:49:12,550
hardest part was just trying to
find, like reach out to people.
953
00:49:12,550 --> 00:49:16,270
Like, it's like classmates like
here and there and sit close to
954
00:49:16,270 --> 00:49:19,470
me, like even like reach out,
like get contact information to
955
00:49:19,470 --> 00:49:22,350
work, you know?
But other than that, like, it's
956
00:49:22,350 --> 00:49:24,710
just like, yeah, I'm not used to
that.
957
00:49:24,710 --> 00:49:27,990
Like having a different class
and like a different department.
958
00:49:30,100 --> 00:49:32,940
It's it's just like, you know
like you have to like really
959
00:49:32,940 --> 00:49:36,980
like understand like even though
it is difficult but at the end
960
00:49:36,980 --> 00:49:38,940
of the day like you're doing it
for a reason obviously.
961
00:49:38,940 --> 00:49:42,860
Like I I didn't want to give up.
Like I'm not gonna just you know
962
00:49:42,900 --> 00:49:45,940
pat like just miss myself in
this class just because there's
963
00:49:45,940 --> 00:49:48,540
people that don't look like me
may not have respect me or
964
00:49:48,540 --> 00:49:50,340
anything like that.
Like, like, what if I was just
965
00:49:50,340 --> 00:49:52,340
saying like, you know, like as
much as you hate being in that
966
00:49:52,340 --> 00:49:55,740
room, like you have to think
about like, like.
967
00:49:56,230 --> 00:49:58,750
How close you are to even just
to finish in graduation And like
968
00:49:58,750 --> 00:50:01,670
you're so close and like you
know you don't have you're not
969
00:50:01,670 --> 00:50:03,350
alone because you have the
health department.
970
00:50:03,670 --> 00:50:06,790
You have those people with you.
So just keep those people like
971
00:50:06,790 --> 00:50:09,550
in the back of your head in a
way where like when I'm in that
972
00:50:09,550 --> 00:50:12,070
room and that's kind of when I
was just like OK, like it's kind
973
00:50:12,070 --> 00:50:14,870
of like a block.
Like I don't know how you
974
00:50:14,870 --> 00:50:19,070
explain it but just like like a
little like wall from them from
975
00:50:19,190 --> 00:50:21,390
that, those those students from
compared to ours kind of like
976
00:50:21,390 --> 00:50:24,710
it's just like you know I'm not
again like I'm not gonna like
977
00:50:24,710 --> 00:50:26,960
just let that.
Prevent me from just, you know,
978
00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:30,600
trying to like pass a class and
like do the best I can to just,
979
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:34,160
you know, go on move forward.
And yeah, that was that was
980
00:50:34,160 --> 00:50:36,560
definitely like one of the
moments that like, I still kind
981
00:50:36,560 --> 00:50:38,680
of think about.
It's just because I was like I
982
00:50:38,680 --> 00:50:41,280
went from being like so scared
to like shaking wise.
983
00:50:41,280 --> 00:50:43,840
And I was just like now I'm just
like, oh, OK like, you know,
984
00:50:43,840 --> 00:50:47,280
like maybe profile was right.
Maybe like going going to her
985
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:50,440
like talking to her about it.
Like really did help out so and
986
00:50:50,440 --> 00:50:53,880
again like she she has helped so
many students and I believe like
987
00:50:53,880 --> 00:50:55,830
you know she have.
She helped Hanri too.
988
00:50:55,830 --> 00:50:58,270
Like just having those little
therapy talks, you know, like,
989
00:50:58,910 --> 00:51:00,910
and I feel like those really
help and I just feel like
990
00:51:00,910 --> 00:51:03,510
they're so underrated in the way
we're like we don't we
991
00:51:03,630 --> 00:51:05,430
definitely take for granted
because we feel like we're going
992
00:51:05,430 --> 00:51:07,750
to get judged in the way.
But like, I feel like if we're
993
00:51:07,750 --> 00:51:09,750
not letting them know what's
going to happen, like what we
994
00:51:09,750 --> 00:51:13,670
feel, then how can they even,
like know about it for them to
995
00:51:13,670 --> 00:51:16,230
even help us out, you know, they
get something and fucking take a
996
00:51:16,230 --> 00:51:21,790
job they'll speak to like the
finding someone to support you.
997
00:51:22,150 --> 00:51:25,260
But like.
Understanding or representative
998
00:51:25,420 --> 00:51:29,140
of your struggle.
So like, even though like on
999
00:51:29,140 --> 00:51:31,780
campus, like in the house
department, the majority of the
1000
00:51:32,620 --> 00:51:34,900
professors in the house
department it is, you know, I'm
1001
00:51:34,900 --> 00:51:39,700
like at times because of
capacity, but seem like you
1002
00:51:39,700 --> 00:51:44,860
know, you, you end up with a
advisor who might not share, I
1003
00:51:44,860 --> 00:51:47,020
guess the same same gender
identity as you.
1004
00:51:48,460 --> 00:51:51,380
But the whole like support
system thing comes into play
1005
00:51:51,380 --> 00:51:54,880
because.
Was pretty much like in the
1006
00:51:54,880 --> 00:51:57,600
reading that we shared.
Like it mentioned something
1007
00:51:57,600 --> 00:52:03,760
about like, pretty much, yeah.
Like the cultural, like cultural
1008
00:52:03,760 --> 00:52:07,320
values that are imposed of men
specifically like my my Chism
1009
00:52:07,960 --> 00:52:10,560
and the way really like the
patriarchy is like kind of like
1010
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:13,320
imposed onto them of like you
need to act this way.
1011
00:52:13,320 --> 00:52:15,960
Be tough, don't ask for help.
I regulate this.
1012
00:52:16,160 --> 00:52:18,720
I regulate the lasto mismo, you
know, like pick yourself up by
1013
00:52:18,720 --> 00:52:21,680
the bootstraps, Say kids are
like Como buttermina, you know,
1014
00:52:21,680 --> 00:52:23,990
like.
And it's like that mentality
1015
00:52:23,990 --> 00:52:27,270
that's like that's a that's a
generational purse.
1016
00:52:27,310 --> 00:52:31,110
And like, it's a generational
purse that y'all, you know,
1017
00:52:31,110 --> 00:52:34,750
where like actively breaking
through, like going and finding,
1018
00:52:34,790 --> 00:52:37,750
you know, mentors, mentors are
talking to people and like
1019
00:52:37,950 --> 00:52:41,030
really reaching out for that
help because like, yeah, like
1020
00:52:41,030 --> 00:52:43,390
culturally, like that's not
taught.
1021
00:52:43,590 --> 00:52:44,870
You know, Like that's not
taught.
1022
00:52:44,870 --> 00:52:48,190
That's not allowed.
And like the whole thing I was
1023
00:52:48,190 --> 00:52:50,190
reading was pretty much like the
support system.
1024
00:52:50,190 --> 00:52:53,480
Like finding other like.
Groups of like either like
1025
00:52:53,720 --> 00:52:55,560
participating.
The example they gave was like a
1026
00:52:55,560 --> 00:52:57,840
fraternity.
But it was like if you find like
1027
00:52:57,840 --> 00:53:01,200
a or system like a fraternity
where you feel people are just
1028
00:53:01,200 --> 00:53:04,360
kind of like common ground or
look at them Motiva to you know,
1029
00:53:04,360 --> 00:53:07,760
go ask for help to go find those
resources or just to just kind
1030
00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:11,000
of like accept that you do need
the help, you know, because
1031
00:53:11,440 --> 00:53:14,600
that's something that in our
culture like it's not really
1032
00:53:14,600 --> 00:53:16,600
taught to us, you know, like
don't ask for help.
1033
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:18,040
Like, I feel like it's always
just like.
1034
00:53:19,160 --> 00:53:23,720
You know, and it's just like,
no, like, it's a generational
1035
00:53:23,720 --> 00:53:26,680
curse.
And yeah, like support systems
1036
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:28,640
are really important.
Yeah, I think that's a very
1037
00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:32,200
tough and very scary like
realization because I don't
1038
00:53:32,200 --> 00:53:34,920
know, it's just kind of like, I
can't really, like ask my
1039
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:37,240
parents for help because like,
they don't understand the
1040
00:53:37,280 --> 00:53:40,840
experience, you know?
So like for me like whenever I
1041
00:53:40,840 --> 00:53:44,760
had help like a lot of the times
I would ask my partner because
1042
00:53:44,760 --> 00:53:46,820
like.
She's also first generation.
1043
00:53:46,820 --> 00:53:50,100
She already went through, you
know the the higher Ed
1044
00:53:50,100 --> 00:53:55,180
experience has already graduated
like, so for me to be able to
1045
00:53:55,180 --> 00:53:58,460
ask for help like she was my go
to like she's still my go to to
1046
00:53:58,460 --> 00:54:00,420
this day.
Like sometimes like even now
1047
00:54:00,420 --> 00:54:02,580
what I'm dealing with is like,
you know, how am I going to pay
1048
00:54:02,580 --> 00:54:05,100
for my student debt?
And like, I asked her, like, how
1049
00:54:05,100 --> 00:54:07,480
do you sign up or like?
Not sign up, like, how do you
1050
00:54:07,480 --> 00:54:09,760
pay or like, where do you go or
like, what do you do?
1051
00:54:09,840 --> 00:54:11,040
And she'll be like, don't worry
about it.
1052
00:54:11,040 --> 00:54:13,040
Like, I got you, you know, like
I've been doing this.
1053
00:54:13,040 --> 00:54:14,600
You know, I had to go to that
too.
1054
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:17,360
So like, if anything, like, oh,
I owe her a lot because like,
1055
00:54:17,640 --> 00:54:20,600
having someone that understands
you coming from that same
1056
00:54:20,600 --> 00:54:25,000
perspective, like, is a huge
plus, is a huge, like, you know,
1057
00:54:25,000 --> 00:54:27,200
I appreciate it.
Like a lot of the help that she
1058
00:54:27,200 --> 00:54:30,000
has, you know, helped me with
and also guided me through
1059
00:54:30,000 --> 00:54:33,240
because if it wasn't for her,
like, I honestly could say,
1060
00:54:33,240 --> 00:54:35,400
like, I probably wouldn't be
here where I'm at right now.
1061
00:54:35,990 --> 00:54:42,070
So speaking about like support
systems, like I have had like
1062
00:54:42,070 --> 00:54:45,390
mentors from my Community
College like that I still keep
1063
00:54:45,390 --> 00:54:50,790
in contact with like, you know,
there one of them is a male.
1064
00:54:50,790 --> 00:54:54,470
And so like, you know, he's also
like from an undocumented
1065
00:54:54,470 --> 00:54:57,110
background.
So like he's always on the
1066
00:54:57,110 --> 00:55:00,030
lookout for helping students.
And so like, I've been fortunate
1067
00:55:00,030 --> 00:55:02,990
enough to be able to receive
that mentorship, receive that
1068
00:55:02,990 --> 00:55:05,190
like feedback and that guidance
to be able to like.
1069
00:55:05,740 --> 00:55:08,620
You know, push myself and be
able to, like, succeed through
1070
00:55:08,620 --> 00:55:12,100
higher education.
My fellow, like, my best
1071
00:55:12,100 --> 00:55:14,740
friends, they've, they graduated
maybe two years ago.
1072
00:55:15,020 --> 00:55:16,460
So I've always had to ask them
as well.
1073
00:55:16,460 --> 00:55:18,740
Like, how'd you guys do?
Or like, how'd you sign up for
1074
00:55:18,740 --> 00:55:19,860
this?
How'd you sign up for that?
1075
00:55:19,860 --> 00:55:21,580
Or like, how was it for you
guys?
1076
00:55:21,580 --> 00:55:23,220
You know?
So like, it's a totally
1077
00:55:23,220 --> 00:55:25,660
different perspective you're
getting all the time.
1078
00:55:25,660 --> 00:55:29,820
So that also helps me put into
like play like what I got to do
1079
00:55:29,820 --> 00:55:34,100
for myself, you know, not
comparing it to other people.
1080
00:55:34,670 --> 00:55:37,430
But like, also seeing, seeing
that like as a motivator to keep
1081
00:55:37,430 --> 00:55:40,350
going, you know, like it's not
the end of the road for me right
1082
00:55:40,350 --> 00:55:42,630
now.
There's so many things that I
1083
00:55:42,630 --> 00:55:45,910
can, you know, put into place
and continue to play, play my
1084
00:55:45,910 --> 00:55:49,550
pieces.
So it's definitely been worth
1085
00:55:49,550 --> 00:55:52,630
it.
Like my mom always tells me,
1086
00:55:52,630 --> 00:55:55,550
like, see, Fuera, Fasil, Tos,
Lourian.
1087
00:55:56,110 --> 00:55:59,870
And you know, that's very true.
Like, education is not for
1088
00:55:59,870 --> 00:56:01,590
everybody.
Like, school's hard.
1089
00:56:01,590 --> 00:56:04,230
Like there was so many times I
just felt like.
1090
00:56:04,570 --> 00:56:07,690
I just wanted to give up.
Like I didn't see myself, you
1091
00:56:07,690 --> 00:56:10,570
know, pursuing anything else.
Like, it was just kind of like I
1092
00:56:10,570 --> 00:56:13,970
hit the end of the road for me.
And you know, being able to meet
1093
00:56:13,970 --> 00:56:16,250
individuals like Y'all like
that's what kept me going
1094
00:56:16,730 --> 00:56:19,050
because, you know, I was like,
damn, like I can't give up on
1095
00:56:19,050 --> 00:56:20,170
them.
Like they haven't given up on
1096
00:56:20,170 --> 00:56:21,770
me, you know?
So like, why would I just, you
1097
00:56:21,770 --> 00:56:24,250
know, put everything down and
just, you know, call it a day.
1098
00:56:24,250 --> 00:56:27,890
So also being able to like
interact with folks like, y'all
1099
00:56:27,890 --> 00:56:29,770
like that's what really kept me
going every day.
1100
00:56:29,770 --> 00:56:31,770
Like I had a purpose, you know,
I had to.
1101
00:56:32,090 --> 00:56:35,630
I had to be in class on on time,
you know, 'cause I know if I
1102
00:56:35,630 --> 00:56:37,510
were walking late, they'll be
like, damn, you're late, you
1103
00:56:37,550 --> 00:56:40,710
know, like you walked in late or
like, damn, you miss class or
1104
00:56:40,710 --> 00:56:43,670
like, you know, stuff like that
that you usually joke around.
1105
00:56:43,670 --> 00:56:46,870
But like I was like, damn, like,
you know, they're gonna notice,
1106
00:56:47,030 --> 00:56:51,270
you know?
But I feel like throughout my
1107
00:56:51,270 --> 00:56:52,750
experience, like that's a no
mistake.
1108
00:56:52,750 --> 00:56:55,190
Like if I found something very
welcoming it was like the
1109
00:56:55,190 --> 00:56:58,430
classes like I was in with y'all
like that was like my second
1110
00:56:58,430 --> 00:57:02,750
home like you know doing study
nights like to until like 2-3 in
1111
00:57:02,750 --> 00:57:04,510
the morning like.
That was it for me.
1112
00:57:04,510 --> 00:57:07,710
Because, like, aside from being
at work all day, like I wanted
1113
00:57:07,710 --> 00:57:09,750
to go study, you know, I wanted
to go spend time with you all
1114
00:57:09,750 --> 00:57:12,310
and like, you know, be able to
connect with you all on the same
1115
00:57:12,310 --> 00:57:15,750
same level.
You know, I wouldn't change a
1116
00:57:15,750 --> 00:57:19,070
thing, to be honest.
Like, like, I tell you like, I
1117
00:57:19,070 --> 00:57:21,870
miss, I miss school.
Like I live right across the
1118
00:57:21,870 --> 00:57:23,830
high school right here.
And so no one stays right around
1119
00:57:23,830 --> 00:57:26,310
the corner.
So I was like, damn, school's
1120
00:57:26,310 --> 00:57:27,990
back in session and what am I
doing?
1121
00:57:27,990 --> 00:57:29,670
Like, you know, I'm just going
to work all day.
1122
00:57:30,990 --> 00:57:34,480
But damn, yeah, just like I told
my partner, like, I feel like
1123
00:57:34,480 --> 00:57:36,560
going to school, like kept me up
on my feet.
1124
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:39,720
Like I had a purpose, you know?
Like I had something to, like,
1125
00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:43,720
be held accountable for.
And now it's like, damn, should
1126
00:57:43,720 --> 00:57:47,640
I send up for another class?
Or, I don't know.
1127
00:57:47,640 --> 00:57:50,360
It's just like, damn.
But yeah, definitely missing
1128
00:57:50,360 --> 00:57:53,200
school for sure.
Hey, come through for real.
1129
00:57:53,320 --> 00:57:54,520
Come through.
That wasn't me.
1130
00:57:54,520 --> 00:57:58,280
That for for an alumni panel.
We're gonna, we'll get it.
1131
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:01,280
We'll get it going somehow.
But we're gonna do an alumni
1132
00:58:01,320 --> 00:58:03,120
panel.
It's important, you know, like.
1133
00:58:03,560 --> 00:58:06,520
Representation's important and
shit Like you're going to show
1134
00:58:06,520 --> 00:58:09,880
your experiences, yeah?
Yeah, definitely.
1135
00:58:09,880 --> 00:58:12,480
Yeah, definitely.
Just like, agree with, like what
1136
00:58:12,480 --> 00:58:14,320
you guys are saying.
Like, like, I remember just,
1137
00:58:14,320 --> 00:58:16,840
like just joking around.
Like we have so much we used to
1138
00:58:16,840 --> 00:58:18,680
do.
Like how we're so lazy to do
1139
00:58:18,680 --> 00:58:21,320
them and then like having to
feel like like they're going to
1140
00:58:21,320 --> 00:58:23,240
call us out.
Like if we didn't do 'em.
1141
00:58:23,240 --> 00:58:27,760
It's just like, I was like, I
was just joking about that and
1142
00:58:27,760 --> 00:58:29,960
then like, but at the same time
we were really like, you know,
1143
00:58:30,120 --> 00:58:33,080
consistent, like, you know?
Making sure we had our bags and
1144
00:58:33,080 --> 00:58:35,840
like, you know, whatever we want
to go is going through it.
1145
00:58:35,840 --> 00:58:39,000
You know, we, we reached out and
you know just talk to each among
1146
00:58:39,000 --> 00:58:41,280
each other.
Even if it was just us three.
1147
00:58:41,280 --> 00:58:44,960
Like, you know, like that never
like annoyed me in a way where
1148
00:58:44,960 --> 00:58:47,720
it was like, man, like I keep
saying keep seeing true.
1149
00:58:47,720 --> 00:58:49,800
I keep seeing handy, like,
where's the rest?
1150
00:58:49,800 --> 00:58:53,240
You know, as much as we wanted
them to be with us, like, you
1151
00:58:53,240 --> 00:58:56,040
know, it was kind of like, well,
you gotta work with what you
1152
00:58:56,040 --> 00:58:59,240
got, you know, Like it's not
like, you know?
1153
00:59:00,060 --> 00:59:01,700
Can't be begging everybody all
the time.
1154
00:59:01,700 --> 00:59:03,300
Like, you know, the people are
busy.
1155
00:59:03,300 --> 00:59:06,340
People got things to do.
But I feel like if it's just at
1156
00:59:06,340 --> 00:59:09,860
least one person and you know,
like that could just still
1157
00:59:09,860 --> 00:59:12,060
change.
You know, like that that the
1158
00:59:12,060 --> 00:59:14,340
amount of impact that sometimes
people don't really realize how
1159
00:59:14,340 --> 00:59:19,940
much it it leads to us like us
students, it really does matter.
1160
00:59:19,940 --> 00:59:22,700
And like, I feel like, you know,
like even in the classrooms, you
1161
00:59:22,700 --> 00:59:24,060
know, we have so much good
memories.
1162
00:59:24,060 --> 00:59:26,380
And like, just like I actually
say, like, I feel like just.
1163
00:59:26,950 --> 00:59:29,750
If I sign up another class too,
just like see just one more
1164
00:59:29,790 --> 00:59:33,870
time, I just like, you know,
just like I don't even think
1165
00:59:33,870 --> 00:59:36,070
about like and these guys are
not annoying of us, you know,
1166
00:59:36,070 --> 00:59:38,230
they really want to be with us.
You know, they're really
1167
00:59:38,230 --> 00:59:41,670
enjoying our teaching, you know,
the way we, you know, we do our
1168
00:59:41,670 --> 00:59:45,070
lessons to them.
So you know, I feel like I
1169
00:59:45,070 --> 00:59:47,310
definitely, it goes back into
like a department, you know,
1170
00:59:47,310 --> 00:59:51,030
like we definitely like should
be a department that that grows,
1171
00:59:51,030 --> 00:59:54,350
expands and I feel like you
know, hopefully like when time
1172
00:59:54,350 --> 00:59:57,130
comes in, you know, like.
Maybe we become one of the
1173
00:59:57,130 --> 00:59:58,530
biggest departments, you know,
who knows?
1174
00:59:58,530 --> 01:00:01,850
And like I feel like again now
so ties in with the institution.
1175
01:00:02,170 --> 01:00:04,970
How much can they bring it to
the table and you know help out
1176
01:00:04,970 --> 01:00:07,250
the professors too who like.
You know they.
1177
01:00:07,610 --> 01:00:10,570
Because professors know how much
the students you know reach out
1178
01:00:10,570 --> 01:00:13,130
to them.
You know, talking about our
1179
01:00:13,130 --> 01:00:14,810
frustrations and like our
concerns.
1180
01:00:14,810 --> 01:00:18,050
Talk us about like how we feel
and like, I feel like, you know,
1181
01:00:18,530 --> 01:00:22,250
you need to hear that and like
really like do something about
1182
01:00:22,250 --> 01:00:24,600
it because I know like.
You know, even just just talking
1183
01:00:24,600 --> 01:00:27,480
to the Dean and how how that how
that was it, that was definitely
1184
01:00:27,480 --> 01:00:30,280
like for me like a, a learning
experience just because, you
1185
01:00:30,280 --> 01:00:33,080
know, like I never thought I was
going to be able to do that.
1186
01:00:33,080 --> 01:00:35,240
Like never thought of myself.
Like I'm going to talk to
1187
01:00:35,240 --> 01:00:37,880
somebody that's like, you know,
like maybe like do something,
1188
01:00:37,880 --> 01:00:41,200
you know, but you know, just
experiences like that.
1189
01:00:41,200 --> 01:00:43,840
It's kind of like, you know,
like you start to think like,
1190
01:00:43,840 --> 01:00:46,920
you know, like why what what's
what's, what's, what's the
1191
01:00:46,920 --> 01:00:48,080
supports in that, you know?
Yeah.
1192
01:00:50,640 --> 01:00:53,510
I feel like.
I feel like we, a lot of us had
1193
01:00:53,510 --> 01:00:58,110
to go through those type of
experiences to really like know
1194
01:00:58,110 --> 01:00:59,310
what it was really about, you
know?
1195
01:00:59,310 --> 01:01:02,710
Like did you ever think about
talking to the Dean, like about
1196
01:01:03,110 --> 01:01:04,350
an issue like that?
Like, no.
1197
01:01:04,350 --> 01:01:06,950
Like, you know, did you really
think that your voice was going
1198
01:01:06,950 --> 01:01:10,790
to, you know, impact how it did?
Like, you don't really think
1199
01:01:10,790 --> 01:01:12,310
about those things.
You know, when you sign up for
1200
01:01:12,310 --> 01:01:14,750
school, you're just like, you
know, as long as I get through
1201
01:01:14,750 --> 01:01:16,150
my classes, like that should be
it.
1202
01:01:16,150 --> 01:01:19,830
But it's a bigger picture than
that for sure, because I feel
1203
01:01:19,830 --> 01:01:21,950
like we can, you know, really
reflect on.
1204
01:01:22,570 --> 01:01:25,410
A lot of the stuff that we did
and you know, a lot of the stuff
1205
01:01:25,410 --> 01:01:30,050
that, you know, our companionos
and companionos got us out of,
1206
01:01:30,050 --> 01:01:33,250
you know, to be able to, you
know, have it fair for everybody
1207
01:01:33,250 --> 01:01:35,610
else.
So a lot of sacrifices were
1208
01:01:35,610 --> 01:01:38,930
made, that's for sure.
A lot of, you know, late nights,
1209
01:01:40,050 --> 01:01:44,210
you know, of staying up and you
know, it recognized.
1210
01:01:44,330 --> 01:01:46,690
You know, you recognize like
what's real.
1211
01:01:46,690 --> 01:01:49,750
You know it's the.
A lot of things had to be
1212
01:01:49,790 --> 01:01:53,070
changed in order for us to be
able to like successfully move
1213
01:01:53,070 --> 01:01:56,630
on.
And I feel like the institution,
1214
01:01:56,630 --> 01:01:59,350
like you said, Jaime, like has
to put into place like our needs
1215
01:02:00,230 --> 01:02:03,750
because you know to this day
2023, like we're still asking
1216
01:02:03,750 --> 01:02:07,750
for like the basic needs.
And it's just like it's a shame
1217
01:02:07,750 --> 01:02:09,110
it's we shouldn't have to do
that.
1218
01:02:09,110 --> 01:02:12,990
We shouldn't have to be asking
for stuff like that, especially
1219
01:02:12,990 --> 01:02:16,230
when, like, we have.
We've been going to like a
1220
01:02:16,470 --> 01:02:20,030
Hispanic serving institution
like and we're the least group
1221
01:02:20,030 --> 01:02:23,390
to be able to get help from
that, you know, so it's kind of
1222
01:02:23,390 --> 01:02:26,070
like a big, you know, once you
experience that, it's kind of
1223
01:02:26,070 --> 01:02:28,750
like a big it's, it's a big
shock because like how could you
1224
01:02:28,750 --> 01:02:31,470
call yourself that if it's not
really guiding the right group
1225
01:02:31,470 --> 01:02:33,430
in the right direction?
You know, people are getting
1226
01:02:33,430 --> 01:02:36,590
left behind, people are dropping
out and then they ask those like
1227
01:02:36,590 --> 01:02:38,110
why are attendance numbers so
low?
1228
01:02:38,110 --> 01:02:42,230
Like it goes to show, you know,
emptiness.
1229
01:02:42,310 --> 01:02:48,030
The numbers show you know so.
It's something to be looked at
1230
01:02:48,030 --> 01:02:52,630
for sure and to continue to be
looked at And another thing like
1231
01:02:53,910 --> 01:02:58,070
we we're living in like a
totally different, like era,
1232
01:02:58,070 --> 01:03:01,510
like, you know, a lot of times
like the professors would say,
1233
01:03:01,510 --> 01:03:04,510
like professors would say like.
Oh, back when I took classes
1234
01:03:04,510 --> 01:03:09,150
like it was like this and I'm
just like, it's not the same
1235
01:03:09,150 --> 01:03:11,670
like it's difficult, like it's
Hard Out Here.
1236
01:03:12,520 --> 01:03:14,400
Like, you know, paying rent is
tough.
1237
01:03:14,400 --> 01:03:16,720
Like getting the next meal is
tough.
1238
01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:18,920
Like living paycheck to
paycheck, like that's fucking
1239
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:22,840
tough.
You know, it's, I don't know.
1240
01:03:23,120 --> 01:03:26,640
It's just like tough right now.
But I know that when the time
1241
01:03:26,640 --> 01:03:29,040
comes, like you know right now,
there's a lot of patience to be
1242
01:03:29,040 --> 01:03:30,360
put into place.
And you know.
1243
01:03:30,640 --> 01:03:32,920
Wait for the right moment, but
we're going to be waiting all
1244
01:03:32,920 --> 01:03:34,800
the all the time, you know?
Might as well you know.
1245
01:03:35,080 --> 01:03:38,640
Get up and do something about it
too, so you'll had anything else
1246
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:40,760
to say.
Anything else y'all want to
1247
01:03:40,760 --> 01:03:46,780
bring up or discuss, Feel free.
I feel like I wanna ask you all
1248
01:03:46,820 --> 01:03:50,260
my question.
Um, how'd you feel?
1249
01:03:50,260 --> 01:03:53,780
Graduation day?
Did the feelings hit graduation
1250
01:03:53,780 --> 01:03:55,540
day or did the feelings hit
after day?
1251
01:03:56,460 --> 01:03:59,940
Like, was it just kind of like
fucking finally get there?
1252
01:03:59,940 --> 01:04:04,780
I mean, or was it just kind of
like shit now?
1253
01:04:04,780 --> 01:04:06,380
What?
Yeah.
1254
01:04:08,330 --> 01:04:11,010
But for me, I was like, OK,
like, I feel like during
1255
01:04:11,010 --> 01:04:13,130
graduation day, it's, it's all
going to hit, right?
1256
01:04:13,130 --> 01:04:15,170
Like this is the actual last
day.
1257
01:04:15,170 --> 01:04:17,970
You know, I'm going to be with
my peers, my professors,
1258
01:04:17,970 --> 01:04:21,130
professors, professors, you
know, just being with them last
1259
01:04:21,330 --> 01:04:24,810
time and just, you know, see my
family being there, first time
1260
01:04:24,810 --> 01:04:27,810
being there.
I'm in the campus throughout my,
1261
01:04:27,810 --> 01:04:29,930
you know, got my time here still
in the state.
1262
01:04:30,690 --> 01:04:32,770
And like, you know, it was kind
of like I was just reflecting
1263
01:04:32,770 --> 01:04:36,010
back on like all the moments,
the memories that I had just
1264
01:04:36,010 --> 01:04:39,880
coming here at 2021.
And like, you know, like, but
1265
01:04:39,880 --> 01:04:42,360
recognizing also that how time
went so fast.
1266
01:04:44,280 --> 01:04:45,960
You know, like, I feel like
we've done so much things
1267
01:04:45,960 --> 01:04:49,480
together, like in the deployment
and where like our friendships
1268
01:04:49,480 --> 01:04:52,360
just went so quick.
Like, I don't know, like there
1269
01:04:52,360 --> 01:04:55,280
that time I was kind of like I
was supposed to let my emotions
1270
01:04:55,280 --> 01:04:56,240
out.
Like that was really was
1271
01:04:56,240 --> 01:04:58,400
supposed to be the day where
like, y'all were going to see
1272
01:04:58,400 --> 01:05:00,240
me.
But like for some reason, like,
1273
01:05:00,240 --> 01:05:02,160
it didn't really click in yet.
Like, I don't know.
1274
01:05:02,160 --> 01:05:04,540
It was just maybe it was kind of
like the thing my mom was
1275
01:05:04,540 --> 01:05:05,780
telling me.
Like, you're still in a normal
1276
01:05:05,780 --> 01:05:07,260
stay.
Like you're not really done yet
1277
01:05:07,260 --> 01:05:10,340
until you like you're actually
going home after graduation.
1278
01:05:10,780 --> 01:05:13,300
So for me, it was just like, you
know, like kind of like it was
1279
01:05:13,300 --> 01:05:15,420
like it felt like another day,
just like kind of like a Russ
1280
01:05:15,420 --> 01:05:17,460
like graduation.
More like, you know, it was
1281
01:05:17,460 --> 01:05:19,660
like, it was like seeing my
friends one more time,
1282
01:05:19,740 --> 01:05:23,700
celebrating with them, having a
good time, taking pictures, you
1283
01:05:23,700 --> 01:05:27,540
know, sharing the moment.
And it didn't really hit me
1284
01:05:27,540 --> 01:05:31,020
until like a week or two, like
after or maybe even a while.
1285
01:05:31,020 --> 01:05:32,860
Like, it was just kind of like,
it took me, it took me a while
1286
01:05:32,860 --> 01:05:35,940
to just really like, like hit me
like it's just like, damn, like
1287
01:05:36,140 --> 01:05:38,820
I'm really done, you know?
Like, I'm really like, like,
1288
01:05:38,820 --> 01:05:42,180
it's like, it went so fast.
Like, I didn't even go that
1289
01:05:42,180 --> 01:05:43,660
fast.
I didn't really expect it to go
1290
01:05:43,660 --> 01:05:45,900
like that.
Like it's just it's just so
1291
01:05:45,940 --> 01:05:47,220
crazy for me.
Like, yeah, Like.
1292
01:05:50,140 --> 01:05:51,460
Yeah, yeah, I could say the
same.
1293
01:05:51,460 --> 01:05:58,940
I feel like it was just like,
damn, it's that's it like even
1294
01:05:58,940 --> 01:06:02,980
just picking up the stool for
like first generation, you know,
1295
01:06:02,980 --> 01:06:05,400
like.
I remember going with Hyman.
1296
01:06:06,200 --> 01:06:09,280
I remember going with Hyman
before the semester started to
1297
01:06:09,280 --> 01:06:12,360
the Green Center.
And I remember taking a video
1298
01:06:12,360 --> 01:06:15,880
and seeing where do you.
I remember taking a video and
1299
01:06:15,880 --> 01:06:18,840
like, I think I said like, where
are we going to be in May, you
1300
01:06:18,840 --> 01:06:20,920
know.
And Hyman's like right here
1301
01:06:20,920 --> 01:06:25,960
graduating and I'm just like
damn, what the fuck?
1302
01:06:26,000 --> 01:06:28,800
Like that's fucking crazy.
Like in a matter of time.
1303
01:06:28,800 --> 01:06:30,240
Like time.
Just like Sakawa.
1304
01:06:30,240 --> 01:06:33,150
Like.
I remember like, damn, am I
1305
01:06:33,150 --> 01:06:34,630
gonna even be able to write my
capsule?
1306
01:06:34,630 --> 01:06:37,350
Like that was the biggest
project I've ever had to do.
1307
01:06:37,350 --> 01:06:41,270
Like you know, they would say
like minimum 40 page paper or
1308
01:06:41,270 --> 01:06:46,430
whatever 20 page paper.
And I was like like just like
1309
01:06:46,870 --> 01:06:49,510
going into context of like
preparing and like writing and
1310
01:06:49,510 --> 01:06:53,710
finishing and getting feedback,
like getting that that e-mail
1311
01:06:53,710 --> 01:06:56,070
like ohh your.
Capsule has been submitted.
1312
01:06:56,590 --> 01:06:58,870
Congrats from graduating.
It was just like unreal like.
1313
01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:01,120
I don't know.
There was like no emotion at the
1314
01:07:01,120 --> 01:07:03,080
time.
But obviously, like telling my
1315
01:07:03,080 --> 01:07:06,640
family like I'm graduating, like
you know, I'm, I'm, I'm walking
1316
01:07:06,640 --> 01:07:10,560
the stage like, you know, come
see me like that was just like a
1317
01:07:10,560 --> 01:07:12,960
bittersweet moment because yeah,
like Hyman said, like at the
1318
01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:17,200
time, like it was hard to
express emotion towards
1319
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:20,320
something like that because I
tried to take in as much as I
1320
01:07:20,320 --> 01:07:24,120
could, you know, getting in
line, getting the picture taken,
1321
01:07:24,600 --> 01:07:28,320
hearing your name on the on the
on the bossina, like.
1322
01:07:29,480 --> 01:07:33,320
I was like, fuck, as much as I
try to look at my parents in the
1323
01:07:33,320 --> 01:07:36,720
audience, I couldn't like, I
just, I couldn't make that eye
1324
01:07:36,720 --> 01:07:40,880
contact because I just, I don't
know, like it was that kind of
1325
01:07:40,880 --> 01:07:44,000
moment where like you could
relive over and over and like
1326
01:07:44,000 --> 01:07:46,480
never forget about how like good
that felt, you know?
1327
01:07:49,080 --> 01:07:54,480
But yeah, being like first in my
family, like, I feel like I
1328
01:07:54,480 --> 01:07:56,400
really set the.
Standard and you know.
1329
01:07:56,860 --> 01:07:59,180
I know that I have some siblings
that are gonna bypass me.
1330
01:07:59,180 --> 01:08:01,460
Like, this is just the
beginning.
1331
01:08:01,460 --> 01:08:06,540
Like, you know, it's just we
really worked hard for this
1332
01:08:06,540 --> 01:08:08,860
moment and we're really getting
what we deserve.
1333
01:08:08,860 --> 01:08:13,700
And like at the end of the day,
like we have a college degree,
1334
01:08:13,700 --> 01:08:15,020
like.
That's fucking crazy.
1335
01:08:15,020 --> 01:08:16,939
You know?
Like, that's just so crazy
1336
01:08:16,979 --> 01:08:20,300
because, like, I go back to.
Just like saying like I never
1337
01:08:20,300 --> 01:08:24,229
really imagined myself.
Attending a university, like,
1338
01:08:24,229 --> 01:08:26,870
let alone a college community
campus.
1339
01:08:27,550 --> 01:08:29,630
So it was like, damn, we really
fucking did that.
1340
01:08:29,670 --> 01:08:33,069
Like we really fucking did that.
So yeah, yeah, that's like
1341
01:08:33,069 --> 01:08:35,990
really like I was just like I
was finding a way to like, you
1342
01:08:35,990 --> 01:08:38,790
know, keep the group, like keep
our friendship and relationships
1343
01:08:38,830 --> 01:08:41,350
going and like just going being
out there.
1344
01:08:41,350 --> 01:08:44,950
Like, you know, it's hard like
on us every single time, you
1345
01:08:44,950 --> 01:08:48,590
know, being to even get in that
position is just, it's it was
1346
01:08:48,590 --> 01:08:49,710
hard.
A lot of sacrifices, like you
1347
01:08:49,710 --> 01:08:52,939
said, you eat a lot of
sacrifices to even get there.
1348
01:08:52,939 --> 01:08:55,939
The late night sessions with
Andre, you know, doing, doing
1349
01:08:55,939 --> 01:08:58,340
the readings.
And just like and when the
1350
01:08:58,340 --> 01:09:00,779
graduation did did come, it was
like, you know, seeing all the
1351
01:09:00,779 --> 01:09:03,899
professors out there looking at
us, admiring us, Like, you know,
1352
01:09:03,899 --> 01:09:06,460
they were kind of like really
like I feel like they were
1353
01:09:06,460 --> 01:09:09,979
really appreciative and like
supportive.
1354
01:09:09,979 --> 01:09:12,859
Like seeing us walk out there
because, you know, because they
1355
01:09:12,859 --> 01:09:16,260
really like did did so much for
us that much as they could.
1356
01:09:16,580 --> 01:09:20,100
Like all the professor, the
professor does, you know, to be
1357
01:09:20,100 --> 01:09:22,060
in there.
And like, I feel like we got to
1358
01:09:22,060 --> 01:09:24,460
give them their flowers too
because you know, they also
1359
01:09:24,460 --> 01:09:28,540
like, expected a lot.
You know, they expected a lot
1360
01:09:28,660 --> 01:09:31,420
from us as well, like.
And again, like that kind of
1361
01:09:31,420 --> 01:09:34,180
goes back into like not giving
up, you know, because you really
1362
01:09:34,180 --> 01:09:37,340
have to depend on people who.
There's a lot of people that are
1363
01:09:37,340 --> 01:09:39,660
dependent on you.
And like, I feel like it, it
1364
01:09:39,819 --> 01:09:41,939
does carry a lot of heavyweight
because, you know, you want to
1365
01:09:41,939 --> 01:09:44,260
set that example.
You want to be that role model.
1366
01:09:44,260 --> 01:09:46,859
You want to be like someone
that, like someone can really
1367
01:09:46,859 --> 01:09:50,220
like, admire you, look up to you
and like really take you
1368
01:09:50,729 --> 01:09:54,930
seriously, like and you know,
just graduated even like even
1369
01:09:54,930 --> 01:09:57,730
for the ones that are going to
graduate this coming up year,
1370
01:09:57,730 --> 01:10:01,250
you know, like next semester,
like it's like think about like
1371
01:10:01,250 --> 01:10:03,570
how much impact you really do
leave to people.
1372
01:10:04,130 --> 01:10:07,370
And I feel like, you know, it's
it's definitely worth a moment.
1373
01:10:07,370 --> 01:10:09,170
Like, you just gotta, like,
embrace it.
1374
01:10:09,410 --> 01:10:12,530
And also, like, be patient, You
know, Like as long as you just
1375
01:10:12,530 --> 01:10:15,970
do what you gotta do and never
give up on yourself and just,
1376
01:10:16,450 --> 01:10:18,610
you know, like, have those
friends with you as well, like
1377
01:10:18,610 --> 01:10:21,330
in the department, like, just
have them with you all the time.
1378
01:10:21,330 --> 01:10:23,770
Like, I'm guarantee you you're
going to be in that position.
1379
01:10:24,170 --> 01:10:27,130
And also just like, you know,
like whatever the professors
1380
01:10:27,130 --> 01:10:30,250
tell you to do, like office
hours as well, like, but not
1381
01:10:30,250 --> 01:10:33,250
like, take that for granted
because I know, like a lot of
1382
01:10:33,250 --> 01:10:36,210
people may not, like, want to do
that, but it's only going to be
1383
01:10:36,210 --> 01:10:39,370
best for you if you really,
like, look into how much they
1384
01:10:39,370 --> 01:10:42,210
can really help you, like, you
know, go to even be in that
1385
01:10:42,210 --> 01:10:45,050
position to, like, walking on
stage, 'cause it's not easy.
1386
01:10:45,130 --> 01:10:48,330
It's definitely not easy like
just but but with belief and
1387
01:10:48,330 --> 01:10:51,100
just, you know, working hard
this it's possible for sure.
1388
01:10:51,620 --> 01:10:54,140
Yeah, but what about you, Henry,
'cause I know you walked the
1389
01:10:54,140 --> 01:10:57,020
stage with us too, so you gotta
give that perspective.
1390
01:10:57,020 --> 01:11:00,060
I know you.
It was beautiful, you know, So
1391
01:11:00,140 --> 01:11:05,020
we gotta hear from you as well.
So I was gonna say like finding
1392
01:11:05,020 --> 01:11:10,100
the friends of the department,
Homeboy say I have a whole
1393
01:11:10,140 --> 01:11:13,340
semester to go.
I gotta, I gotta build these
1394
01:11:13,340 --> 01:11:16,940
support systems.
You still got us, though.
1395
01:11:18,960 --> 01:11:21,240
He still got us though.
Yeah, I'm just like, of course,
1396
01:11:21,480 --> 01:11:25,800
yeah.
But for me, like, all I gotta
1397
01:11:25,800 --> 01:11:28,720
say is like Viva, those
nontraditional students, 'cause
1398
01:11:28,720 --> 01:11:32,240
we're all nontraditional.
And like, I was able to
1399
01:11:32,240 --> 01:11:35,000
celebrate graduation, you know,
But I still have to complete the
1400
01:11:35,000 --> 01:11:37,160
semester.
And, like, it's been a whole lot
1401
01:11:37,160 --> 01:11:39,760
of mixed feelings, like
graduation.
1402
01:11:39,760 --> 01:11:43,000
Like, damn, I don't deserve
this, you know, like really like
1403
01:11:43,320 --> 01:11:45,200
feeling like I have undone
business.
1404
01:11:45,200 --> 01:11:48,030
And it's like, yeah, he's still
coming on though, but at the
1405
01:11:48,030 --> 01:11:50,750
same time, like when I was
checking in with the peers, it
1406
01:11:50,750 --> 01:11:53,070
was just kind of like you work
till the hard and you're not
1407
01:11:53,070 --> 01:11:56,150
going to celebrate.
Like who cares if you don't
1408
01:11:56,150 --> 01:11:57,350
graduate until the next
semester?
1409
01:11:57,350 --> 01:12:00,310
You know, like this is your
graduate patient and you deserve
1410
01:12:00,310 --> 01:12:03,990
it, you know, celebrate.
So it's just kind of been like,
1411
01:12:03,990 --> 01:12:10,030
you know, like all of that.
But overall like damn, like I
1412
01:12:10,030 --> 01:12:13,070
just have like I have one core
memory and I don't know if y'all
1413
01:12:13,070 --> 01:12:18,560
saw it like saw this but and the
ceremony we were all sitting
1414
01:12:18,560 --> 01:12:20,680
down he couldn't stop and he
he's being a little proposorris
1415
01:12:20,680 --> 01:12:23,720
to walk outside and the cows
professors are walking.
1416
01:12:24,160 --> 01:12:27,040
I got it from my chair and I
started like throwing my face in
1417
01:12:27,040 --> 01:12:33,200
the in the air and I was like
and the kind of like looked over
1418
01:12:33,200 --> 01:12:37,760
and she started doing the same
thing and that's like one of my
1419
01:12:37,760 --> 01:12:39,480
core memories from graduating
this shit.
1420
01:12:39,480 --> 01:12:44,560
Just kind of like the sort of
like I was also like, we're
1421
01:12:44,560 --> 01:12:46,440
sitting down, fuck that.
I'm not sitting down.
1422
01:12:46,440 --> 01:12:50,400
I'm getting up.
I'm standing like, you know,
1423
01:12:50,400 --> 01:12:54,640
like, and just kind of having
the Vms kind of receive that and
1424
01:12:54,640 --> 01:12:58,080
also like, reciprocate that.
Like season, like season.
1425
01:12:58,080 --> 01:13:01,360
Like, it was just kind of like I
say you did it, 'cause, yeah,
1426
01:13:01,560 --> 01:13:07,720
you're done for now, but, you
know, what's what's your next
1427
01:13:07,720 --> 01:13:10,960
steps of it?
So I don't even spend a lot, but
1428
01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:13,440
definitely beautiful time to be
able to share with Joe.
1429
01:13:14,080 --> 01:13:16,120
No, Yeah.
I mean, it's a lot of things
1430
01:13:16,120 --> 01:13:19,400
happened that day of graduation,
you know, just like the, the
1431
01:13:19,400 --> 01:13:23,880
long wait to walk on to where we
were going to be seeing, like,
1432
01:13:24,040 --> 01:13:25,840
it was like take a picture here,
take a picture there.
1433
01:13:25,840 --> 01:13:28,200
And then you see like all these
kinds of people and you're like,
1434
01:13:28,600 --> 01:13:30,360
down the line, never fucking
ends.
1435
01:13:30,360 --> 01:13:34,840
Like it was just like
unbelievable once in a lifetime
1436
01:13:34,840 --> 01:13:38,080
experience.
Like, I don't know, like.
1437
01:13:38,280 --> 01:13:39,680
I saw my peers.
I saw.
1438
01:13:41,060 --> 01:13:42,660
You know these people that I
built connections with
1439
01:13:42,660 --> 01:13:49,100
throughout many semesters and it
was like Cassie said, like can
1440
01:13:49,100 --> 01:13:51,420
answer Soltarma latagamas, but
was no.
1441
01:13:52,980 --> 01:13:55,740
It's just like, it was hard to
be able to express that, you
1442
01:13:55,780 --> 01:13:59,260
know, You know what I mean?
Cuz I was just like, damn, this
1443
01:13:59,260 --> 01:14:03,100
is really over, you know?
And it was like a lot of people
1444
01:14:03,100 --> 01:14:05,140
were talking like, oh.
What's your next plan or like
1445
01:14:05,220 --> 01:14:07,460
you plan on staying here local
and I'm like give you.
1446
01:14:09,960 --> 01:14:15,040
Yeah, you know, stuff like that.
But yeah, just Rasa Grad.
1447
01:14:15,040 --> 01:14:17,920
And for sure, like when they had
the mariachi playing, I was
1448
01:14:17,920 --> 01:14:20,520
like, damn, this is like fucking
beautiful.
1449
01:14:20,600 --> 01:14:24,640
Like the mariachi trumpet was
just playing at Tolo Caledava.
1450
01:14:24,800 --> 01:14:26,360
I mean, like, itara, like
everything, you know?
1451
01:14:26,360 --> 01:14:31,560
It was just like, damn, like I
never really saw someone or saw
1452
01:14:31,560 --> 01:14:37,200
like an event tailored to us.
You know, like everybody, even
1453
01:14:37,200 --> 01:14:38,800
if you didn't know and like
everybody.
1454
01:14:39,430 --> 01:14:42,030
Everybody was just so proud of
like everybody walking and like
1455
01:14:42,030 --> 01:14:44,910
everybody being there it was.
Just a beautiful.
1456
01:14:44,910 --> 01:14:46,750
Moment for sure.
Beautiful, beautiful.
1457
01:14:47,470 --> 01:14:50,990
It's the and you know to a lot
of my, my peers as well like
1458
01:14:50,990 --> 01:14:53,590
congratulations to everybody
that graduated and you know
1459
01:14:53,590 --> 01:14:56,750
congratulations to everybody
that you know is going to still
1460
01:14:56,870 --> 01:15:00,790
work towards that achievement.
And you know, I just want to
1461
01:15:00,790 --> 01:15:06,110
give a quick shout out to Mr.
Companiono Miguel, who, you
1462
01:15:06,110 --> 01:15:09,150
know, had very a lot of
semesters with us as well.
1463
01:15:10,250 --> 01:15:13,010
I know that right now he's at
San Jose State getting his
1464
01:15:13,210 --> 01:15:17,490
masters in social work And so
you don't see a lot of older
1465
01:15:17,490 --> 01:15:20,010
Chicanos getting going that
route.
1466
01:15:20,410 --> 01:15:23,410
So like you know, huge, huge
respect to that guy.
1467
01:15:25,650 --> 01:15:28,010
And I know that that day of
graduation, like he had a
1468
01:15:28,010 --> 01:15:31,250
poster, that once he walked
across the stage, he was like
1469
01:15:31,250 --> 01:15:34,210
San Jose Bound, you know?
And that was like the most bad
1470
01:15:34,210 --> 01:15:36,570
ass fucking thing.
Because even though, like,
1471
01:15:36,570 --> 01:15:39,090
nobody knew him, you know as
much in the crowd, like.
1472
01:15:39,360 --> 01:15:41,640
Soon as he posts that he, you
know, took out that board,
1473
01:15:41,640 --> 01:15:44,560
everybody was like, hell, yeah,
like, you know, that shit was
1474
01:15:44,560 --> 01:15:47,080
fucking beautiful.
So, like props to him, you know,
1475
01:15:47,080 --> 01:15:51,400
I I'm sure he's going to do
really good, you know, as he's
1476
01:15:51,400 --> 01:15:53,840
always done.
So I'm not surprised.
1477
01:15:54,360 --> 01:15:57,160
Yeah, definitely.
I I 100% agree, like for anyone
1478
01:15:57,160 --> 01:16:00,000
that knows Miguel, everybody
knows how humble he is, how much
1479
01:16:00,000 --> 01:16:02,320
he works hard and like
respectful, man.
1480
01:16:02,320 --> 01:16:05,640
You know, I was looking at that
for us as you know people in the
1481
01:16:05,640 --> 01:16:08,570
department.
And like, I feel like like I
1482
01:16:08,570 --> 01:16:11,970
just, it's it's for me.
I feel like maybe I could be
1483
01:16:11,970 --> 01:16:13,810
wrong, but like I feel like
maybe a lot of people didn't
1484
01:16:13,810 --> 01:16:16,330
really really reach out to him
as much as, you know, we wanted
1485
01:16:16,330 --> 01:16:17,850
to.
And like, I feel like for him,
1486
01:16:17,850 --> 01:16:20,570
he had his struggles.
He had his, you know, personal
1487
01:16:20,570 --> 01:16:24,010
things going on in his life,
even him to ensure that in
1488
01:16:24,010 --> 01:16:26,090
accounts 474.
Like it was something that like,
1489
01:16:26,250 --> 01:16:29,130
you know like in shock to a lot
of us because we didn't know.
1490
01:16:29,130 --> 01:16:32,210
And like, I feel like for him to
just even open up and like now
1491
01:16:32,210 --> 01:16:35,290
we really get to understand like
where his story is coming from.
1492
01:16:35,290 --> 01:16:38,440
And like just again, like how he
walked up in the stage showing
1493
01:16:38,440 --> 01:16:41,080
that San Jose stay posted.
Like that's something to be
1494
01:16:41,080 --> 01:16:43,600
really fucking proud of because
like, damn, like not how you
1495
01:16:43,600 --> 01:16:46,600
say, like not a lot of people go
up in that position.
1496
01:16:46,600 --> 01:16:50,440
You know, like for him, you
know, like it just really opened
1497
01:16:50,440 --> 01:16:53,920
up to us And like what what he's
really has gone through and
1498
01:16:53,920 --> 01:16:55,960
still right now is, you know
just working on his life,
1499
01:16:55,960 --> 01:16:59,080
working on his mental health.
And like and I feel like, you
1500
01:16:59,080 --> 01:17:02,040
know, like we're really like
fortunate like and blessed to
1501
01:17:02,040 --> 01:17:04,800
just meet somebody like that in
the department who you know,
1502
01:17:04,880 --> 01:17:08,280
like is just willing to share
his experiences and like, you
1503
01:17:08,280 --> 01:17:10,920
know, even teach, teach us, you
know, like what?
1504
01:17:11,480 --> 01:17:12,920
Like what we can learn from him
as well?
1505
01:17:13,880 --> 01:17:17,640
Yeah, I could say like, you
know, after having known him for
1506
01:17:17,640 --> 01:17:22,840
a couple like few years
semesters like I could say like
1507
01:17:22,840 --> 01:17:24,640
his life is completely turn
around for like.
1508
01:17:24,880 --> 01:17:29,760
The best of the best, like we
talk about stories like from,
1509
01:17:30,240 --> 01:17:33,320
you know, perspective.
From that point of view, but.
1510
01:17:33,650 --> 01:17:36,490
To see someone achieve like
higher greatness and like
1511
01:17:36,490 --> 01:17:40,370
succeed like right in front of
you, like that's a beautiful
1512
01:17:40,370 --> 01:17:42,010
thing.
Like that's just like something
1513
01:17:42,010 --> 01:17:42,970
you don't see every day, you
know?
1514
01:17:42,970 --> 01:17:45,770
And like I looked up to him for
like motivation.
1515
01:17:45,770 --> 01:17:47,610
I looked up to him for like some
guidance.
1516
01:17:47,610 --> 01:17:51,930
Like, you know, we definitely
have like an age difference, you
1517
01:17:51,930 --> 01:17:56,530
know with him that'll he's wise,
like he's smart, like he knows
1518
01:17:56,530 --> 01:18:00,170
what he's doing and like.
I remember him talk talking
1519
01:18:00,170 --> 01:18:03,880
about like how.
At the moment that he graduates
1520
01:18:04,080 --> 01:18:06,480
at the university, his
daughter's also graduating high
1521
01:18:06,480 --> 01:18:08,360
school.
So, like, holy shit, like,
1522
01:18:08,520 --> 01:18:11,520
that's fucking badass.
Like, how many times do you hear
1523
01:18:11,520 --> 01:18:13,200
that?
You know, like your daughter's
1524
01:18:13,200 --> 01:18:14,800
graduating high school while
you're graduating the
1525
01:18:14,800 --> 01:18:16,480
university?
Like, if that's not a huge
1526
01:18:16,480 --> 01:18:17,960
motivator for you, like, I
don't.
1527
01:18:17,960 --> 01:18:20,160
I don't know what else could be
like.
1528
01:18:20,160 --> 01:18:22,000
That was just like, beautiful
thing within itself.
1529
01:18:22,040 --> 01:18:24,520
So then, profst Miguel,
Congrasso, Miguel.
1530
01:18:24,760 --> 01:18:28,040
But yeah, I mean, if there's
nothing else, then I feel like
1531
01:18:28,040 --> 01:18:31,200
that's good.
I should say one more thing.
1532
01:18:32,670 --> 01:18:36,350
You know, I know we have a
couple graduates here, but at
1533
01:18:36,350 --> 01:18:38,670
the end of the day, I always
feel like just because you
1534
01:18:38,670 --> 01:18:43,310
graduated, that doesn't mean
that you are define yourself as
1535
01:18:43,510 --> 01:18:46,350
higher than anybody else.
I always feel like for me it's
1536
01:18:46,350 --> 01:18:49,350
like, OK, I graduated, but I
want everybody to graduate, you
1537
01:18:49,350 --> 01:18:51,990
know, with me.
And it might not be the same
1538
01:18:51,990 --> 01:18:55,790
semester, but even if it's next
semester, it's for me that's
1539
01:18:55,790 --> 01:18:59,310
still a huge win because I'm
seeing my people, you know, also
1540
01:18:59,310 --> 01:19:02,850
achieve what I achieve and how
much they put also it for them
1541
01:19:02,850 --> 01:19:05,810
to put the work in.
And for me, like, not everyone's
1542
01:19:05,810 --> 01:19:07,130
the same.
Everyone is different.
1543
01:19:07,130 --> 01:19:09,570
You know, everyone's taking
their time.
1544
01:19:09,930 --> 01:19:12,770
You know, it's just like
understanding that like at the
1545
01:19:12,770 --> 01:19:14,970
end of the day, like we have to
keep supporting each other.
1546
01:19:14,970 --> 01:19:19,290
And like, you know, it's just
like and that just keeps the
1547
01:19:19,290 --> 01:19:22,930
whole, like friendship going,
you know, like, I don't know
1548
01:19:23,130 --> 01:19:26,930
simple and just like, you know,
realizing the, like, you know
1549
01:19:26,930 --> 01:19:31,100
there's people that like just or
maybe the path are just very
1550
01:19:31,100 --> 01:19:33,300
different from yours, but at the
same they're still reaching the
1551
01:19:33,300 --> 01:19:35,100
same goal.
It's just, you know, they're
1552
01:19:35,100 --> 01:19:37,780
just taking their time And, you
know, we just gotta keep up
1553
01:19:38,020 --> 01:19:38,940
with.
Because at the end of the day,
1554
01:19:38,940 --> 01:19:42,460
like it's it's always beautiful
to see, like you're seeing
1555
01:19:42,460 --> 01:19:45,100
people that have you gone to
class with for like, you know,
1556
01:19:45,100 --> 01:19:48,420
for a whole, like your whole
personal, like education, higher
1557
01:19:48,420 --> 01:19:51,140
Ed, like, you know, be in that
position, walking on the stage
1558
01:19:51,140 --> 01:19:54,900
and just receiving a diploma and
not like, yeah, that's just what
1559
01:19:54,900 --> 01:19:58,060
I want to say.
Any last thoughts of 100?
1560
01:20:02,720 --> 01:20:05,280
I don't know, is there 'cause I
think I met said that really
1561
01:20:05,320 --> 01:20:09,440
nicely.
Like, yeah, like, I mean I was
1562
01:20:09,440 --> 01:20:12,680
not like the scene and I hate to
like associate, but like if you
1563
01:20:12,680 --> 01:20:22,360
don't know me, Cortana or get
little of the best and then I
1564
01:20:22,360 --> 01:20:27,320
better sell a persona.
Masaca also.
1565
01:20:27,790 --> 01:20:31,390
And yeah, like a little long
listen, if you cut now that
1566
01:20:31,390 --> 01:20:34,710
doesn't mean anything.
But under in this society, it
1567
01:20:34,710 --> 01:20:38,470
does get you further, you know,
it is a way to be able to like
1568
01:20:38,710 --> 01:20:40,590
climb up the ladder.
Guess what He said.
1569
01:20:41,070 --> 01:20:44,790
And it's unfortunate that we
have to struggle so hard, you
1570
01:20:45,110 --> 01:20:47,350
know, and fight so hard for our
education.
1571
01:20:47,950 --> 01:20:50,670
But it considers the head on
like it's worth it.
1572
01:20:51,030 --> 01:20:52,790
It's definitely worth it.
The friendships, the
1573
01:20:52,790 --> 01:20:57,250
relationships, what you learn.
And honestly, like she's me.
1574
01:20:57,290 --> 01:20:59,410
I'm doing hurting out with
people, you know, I think that's
1575
01:20:59,490 --> 01:21:03,850
also, yeah.
Yeah, well, I just wanted to say
1576
01:21:03,850 --> 01:21:06,810
thank you for for coming on the
podcast.
1577
01:21:06,810 --> 01:21:11,690
You know, I hope this is not the
last and whenever y'all want to
1578
01:21:11,690 --> 01:21:12,970
like, you're more than welcome
to come.
1579
01:21:12,970 --> 01:21:14,770
On here and express your
thoughts.
1580
01:21:14,770 --> 01:21:19,090
You know, I'm trying to, I'm
trying my best to just kind of
1581
01:21:19,090 --> 01:21:23,170
bring this platform back and now
that I have more time outside of
1582
01:21:23,170 --> 01:21:25,770
school, like just trying to get
back into the groove.
1583
01:21:26,290 --> 01:21:31,290
But thank you for, you know,
being host with me on this
1584
01:21:31,890 --> 01:21:33,890
episode.
And I think it's just one of
1585
01:21:33,890 --> 01:21:37,890
those important talks that we
should continue to have as a
1586
01:21:37,890 --> 01:21:40,370
community to be able to like
better understand where people
1587
01:21:40,370 --> 01:21:44,010
are coming from, their different
perspectives, as well as like
1588
01:21:44,010 --> 01:21:46,170
being able to help our community
get out there.
1589
01:21:46,170 --> 01:21:49,650
And like, you know, I always
tell like other people like to
1590
01:21:49,650 --> 01:21:51,770
show them that they're not
alone, that they have like
1591
01:21:52,050 --> 01:21:53,530
someone that might look like
them.
1592
01:21:54,010 --> 01:21:56,410
Going through the same thing or
has gone through the same thing.
1593
01:21:56,850 --> 01:22:00,730
So with that being said, like I
appreciate y'all for for your
1594
01:22:00,730 --> 01:22:06,850
time and for speaking facts on
this and without further ado
1595
01:22:06,850 --> 01:22:10,490
like thank you for being here.
Appreciate you guys.
1596
01:22:10,890 --> 01:22:12,090
Thank you, Chewy.
Thank you Chewy.
1597
01:22:12,090 --> 01:22:15,650
Also just like again, thank you
for for letting me be in your
1598
01:22:15,650 --> 01:22:17,770
podcast again.
I know I've been there for like
1599
01:22:18,370 --> 01:22:21,330
already one time but this time I
feel like this is nice just
1600
01:22:21,330 --> 01:22:24,640
because we had it handed in and
you know like kind of like we're
1601
01:22:24,640 --> 01:22:26,880
seeing the same group that we
were like you know with and I
1602
01:22:27,040 --> 01:22:30,800
like just the community is
really there also do what I say
1603
01:22:30,800 --> 01:22:34,880
is like we definitely gotta like
come together like reunite soon
1604
01:22:34,880 --> 01:22:37,520
like get together like go get
some food or something like
1605
01:22:37,880 --> 01:22:40,320
whether it be at runner park or
wherever it be like you know
1606
01:22:40,320 --> 01:22:42,720
just catch up.
Because I feel like we
1607
01:22:42,720 --> 01:22:46,560
definitely like need to catch up
very soon before you know maybe
1608
01:22:47,120 --> 01:22:48,960
when they're during the
semester, when holidays
1609
01:22:49,040 --> 01:22:51,550
starting.
So and hopefully when the time
1610
01:22:51,750 --> 01:22:54,750
we all have in our schedule we
we'll go out there and we'll
1611
01:22:54,750 --> 01:22:56,350
make it happen.
Yeah, most definitely.
1612
01:22:58,470 --> 01:22:59,070
Alrighty.