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Janine Garner speaks with Kylie Paatsch about her new book, The Connect Effect, and why engagement in organizations keeps slipping despite more tools, more process, and more measurement. Kylie shares the leadership lessons behind the book, the model she has used for decades, and how connection becomes the pathway to trust, accountability, and performance.This conversation is especially useful for senior leaders who want more than inspiration. It gets practical about how to know people better, show that you know them, and grow them with intention.
Key topics- Kylie shares why she wrote The Connect Effect now, and names the five P’s behind the decision: problems, purpose, practicality, positioning, and proof.
- She explains the problem she is trying to solve: declining engagement, and the way many organizations still underestimate the relational side of leadership.
- Kylie reflects on the moment that pushed her to turn years of experience into a book, including the realization that she already had a model that worked.
- She talks about proving to herself that she could write, and how an old comment from an English teacher shaped her self-doubt for years.
- Janine and Kylie discuss the difference between having expertise and actually articulating it clearly in a structured, usable way.
- Kylie breaks down why engagement is dropping, including the impact of multiple generations in the workforce, hybrid work, and the growing distance between senior leaders and everyone else.
- She warns against surface-level fixes like return-to-office mandates, breakfast events, morning teas, and ping pong tables when the real issue is disconnection.
- Kylie shares how assumptions after engagement surveys can make things worse if leaders do not get curious and ask better questions.
- The conversation centers on Kylie’s three-part model: know them, show them, grow them.
- Kylie explains that connection is not the outcome itself, but the pathway to trust, loyalty, accountability, engagement, and performance.
- She describes the leadership mistake of expecting people to step up while leaders continue to micromanage instead of building capability, responsibility, and initiative.
- Janine and Kylie both stress that meaningful leadership requires time, presence, and deliberate attention to the people in your team.
Key frameworks
The five P’sKylie says she wrote the book because of:
- Problems
- Purpose
- Practicality
- Positioning
- Proof
Know, show, growKylie’s core leadership model for building connection and engagement:
- Know them
- Show them
- Grow them
Know them,Start by understanding:
- Their why
- Their way
- Their wants
Show them,Kylie breaks this into three parts:
- Show you know
- Show you care
- Show them the way
Grow themHelp people develop:
- Capability
- Responsibility
- Initiative
Connect with Kylie: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kyliepaatsch/
Notable quotes“Connection is the pathway to trust, it’s the pathway to engagement, it’s the pathway to accountability, it’s the pathway to performance.”
“Human connection is going to be the glue that keeps us together.”
“When you show you know, you’re actually saying to someone else, ‘Yeah, I get you.’”
Timestamps00:00 - Why Janine wanted Kylie on the show
02:33 - The moment Kylie realized her book was already inside her work
05:18 - What writing the book taught Kylie about structure and clarity
08:03 - Why leaders want practical help, not just ideas
09:25 - Why engagement is declining across generations and hybrid teams
14:33 - Surface-level fixes that do not solve disengagement
16:23 - The danger of making assumptions instead of asking questions
18:06 - Why connection is the pathway to trust and performance
20:08 - The origin story of the know, show, grow model
24:37 - Know them: why, way, and wants
27:15 - Show them: show you know, show you care, show them the way
30:34 - Grow them: capability, responsibility, and initiative
31:52 - Why the model demands intentional time from leaders
33:30 - Why AI has not yet created the leadership time people expected
34:53 - Accountability and conscious discipline in leadership
36:16 - Kylie’s wishes for the book and what she hopes it changes
39:05 - Janine’s role in helping Kylie bring the book into the world
