98: Is There Really Such a Thing as an Addictive Personality

WEBVTT
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.440
And then the balance comes, and we just keep calling and learning and listening and growing.
00:00:05.679 --> 00:00:08.560
This is the Addiction Recovery Podcast with Steven T.
00:00:08.720 --> 00:00:12.480
Ginsburg, founder of Restore Detox Centers in Sunny, California.
00:00:12.640 --> 00:00:14.560
Enjoy your experience.
00:00:19.679 --> 00:00:22.160
Steven, so good to be back together with you today.
00:00:22.320 --> 00:00:25.120
I want to jump into addiction switching.
00:00:25.199 --> 00:00:33.520
And I want to hear your thoughts on quitting drugs or alcohol, but then also replacing those with a different addiction.
00:00:33.759 --> 00:00:35.280
So let's go ahead and jump in.
00:00:35.520 --> 00:00:36.320
Steve, I love it.
00:00:36.399 --> 00:00:37.840
It's great to be back with you as well.
00:00:37.920 --> 00:00:42.640
Um this is just a a stronghold in in the journey.
00:00:42.799 --> 00:00:44.640
And I think very common.
00:00:44.960 --> 00:00:54.240
And I and I think so many times there can be really positive elements that come into play and that become our new focus.
00:00:54.479 --> 00:01:05.280
I think we can be more intentional with our family, be in more intentional with our body, mind, spirit side of our life, be more intentional with things like reading with work, et cetera.
00:01:05.519 --> 00:01:15.680
And then I think again, that that absolutely obsessive, compulsive element that we carry in our gene code can also lead us to a different sort of demise.
00:01:15.760 --> 00:01:18.400
Uh, I think we have to be very mindful where sex is concerned.
00:01:18.480 --> 00:01:21.120
I think we have to be very mindful where gambling is concerned.
00:01:21.280 --> 00:01:31.760
I think we have to look at our relationship with food and always consider our gene code as we continue to navigate life a day at a time on life's terms.
00:01:32.079 --> 00:01:38.159
So let's talk about addiction because you always refer to this concept of unmanageability.
00:01:38.400 --> 00:01:40.159
So maybe you could get into that just a little bit.
00:01:40.319 --> 00:01:43.439
Like, what do you mean by that when you say unmanageability?
00:01:44.079 --> 00:02:06.879
Yeah, I believe any anything that we are having present in our lives that rears its ugly head and creates elements or levels of discourse or chaos or confusion or powerlessness is inherently unmanageable.
00:02:07.040 --> 00:02:20.800
And I think we have to be mindful to make sure that the other things that we are focused on, even listen, there's people who are and have been rightfully had this addressed rightfully.
00:02:20.879 --> 00:02:23.039
Hey, you're hiding out in the rooms of AA.
00:02:23.120 --> 00:02:25.680
You've got to get out there and live.
00:02:25.840 --> 00:02:32.479
This we don't get sober so we can go to four meetings a day and and do nothing but be sober.
00:02:32.639 --> 00:02:36.159
We get sober to live full, rich, complete lives.
00:02:36.240 --> 00:02:44.000
And I don't mean rich materially, I mean rich in in activity and pursuits and to focus on our loved ones and to give back.
00:02:44.240 --> 00:02:50.479
And so it's just important to have that balance in our life and our lifestyle in all things, including for myself.
00:02:50.560 --> 00:02:53.039
And that's something I'm on watch for on a daily basis.
00:02:53.280 --> 00:03:07.199
Yeah, and it's interesting because, you know, we we've talked about this before in other episodes where, you know, some people may think, hey, I I drink a few days a week, but you know, I'm not addicted.
00:03:07.439 --> 00:03:10.080
Or I smoke weed, but I'm not addicted.
00:03:10.159 --> 00:03:12.159
You know, I I could really manage it.
00:03:12.400 --> 00:03:16.879
And it's it's interesting because the other day I was actually thinking about this topic about marijuana.
00:03:16.960 --> 00:03:18.400
I used to smoke a lot of weed.
00:03:18.639 --> 00:03:20.719
And I would smoke weed pretty much like every day.
00:03:20.879 --> 00:03:23.919
There's a period in my life long, long time ago, where I did this.
00:03:24.479 --> 00:03:28.159
And you know how people say all the time, like, weed is not addictive.
00:03:28.719 --> 00:03:30.479
It's a gateway drug, but it's not addictive.
00:03:30.639 --> 00:03:33.680
So I was thinking about this, I don't know why this popped in my head.
00:03:33.919 --> 00:03:46.960
And it's great for today's discussion because I remember when I was smoking weed, and when I would get down to the last little bit, you know, where it's like, okay, I could do, I could load my pipe one more time, maybe.
00:03:47.520 --> 00:03:50.479
I would seriously start to panic.
00:03:50.719 --> 00:03:52.639
Like, what am I gonna do?
00:03:52.719 --> 00:03:57.439
It's it's Friday night, and then what but what am I gonna do Saturday morning when I'm out?
00:03:57.520 --> 00:04:08.000
And then it I'm like calling people, and if if it's like one of my buddies had it, but he was 90 minutes away, I'd get in my car and drive 90 minutes just to secure a little bit of weed for the weekend.
00:04:08.159 --> 00:04:09.039
That's addiction.
00:04:09.199 --> 00:04:11.439
That's called 100 addiction.
00:04:11.680 --> 00:04:16.800
Because if it was manageable and it wasn't an addiction, I'd be like, Oh, no big deal.
00:04:16.879 --> 00:04:18.800
I'm gonna be out, you know, I'll do it next week.
00:04:18.879 --> 00:04:19.519
No big deal.
00:04:19.600 --> 00:04:23.839
No, no, it was like 100% mission critical.
00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:28.399
The only thing I could focus on, even at the expense of food, everything else.
00:04:28.560 --> 00:04:32.000
Like, I gotta skip dinner, I gotta make this drive, I gotta meet this guy at this time.
00:04:32.160 --> 00:04:33.920
That's an that's addiction.
00:04:34.240 --> 00:04:35.839
A thousand percent it is.
00:04:36.480 --> 00:04:37.439
That's addiction.
00:04:37.519 --> 00:04:41.680
That's that's complete, utter powerlessness and unmanageability.
00:04:41.920 --> 00:04:45.759
You know, we live to use and we use to live, and it's all part of it.
00:04:46.000 --> 00:05:02.079
And again, that rendering can apply itself to any facet of our life, uh, whether it's exercise, shopping, gambling, food, work, many people will go from alcoholism and addiction and go into workaholism.
00:05:02.319 --> 00:05:13.120
I have had moments with my work where Nicole uh thankfully has been able to have some really productive conversations with me about where I need to be mindful of my focus.
00:05:13.199 --> 00:05:23.600
And it's it's easy to get defensive, it's easy to naysay it, but what's productive and important is to apply those principles in what in all our affairs.
00:05:23.839 --> 00:05:34.480
And so if my wife was to point something out like that out to me, which she did at one point, not too too long ago, and I was like, hey, now I need to look at that, pray on that, and pivot.
00:05:34.959 --> 00:05:36.480
And that's exactly what I did.
00:05:36.560 --> 00:05:43.120
And that's what this thing, that's the art of this of this journey, of this trudge, of this walk with purpose.
00:05:43.279 --> 00:05:44.160
That's what this is about.
00:05:44.319 --> 00:05:51.360
And it's listen, like we grow or we go and we are gone, and we keep growing, and it's perpetual.
00:05:51.439 --> 00:05:57.759
And we stay to some degrees, we stay new and we keep exploring, and then we work on different things.
00:05:57.839 --> 00:06:05.519
And that's been a lot of of how it's been for me this year, and this year, this sober year of mine is I'm heading towards an anniversary.
00:06:05.680 --> 00:06:14.560
There have been things that have come up this year, great things that I've chosen to work on that are fulfilling that are helping me with that unmanageability.
00:06:15.120 --> 00:06:19.120
Do you think okay, because I I think we have similar personalities in some regards.
00:06:19.279 --> 00:06:26.160
I agree with this because you know, I'm definitely obsessive in a lot of ways, and I have addictive personality, but more on that here in a minute.
00:06:26.319 --> 00:06:37.759
But do you think it's okay, though, sometimes to substitute, let's just say I'm a full-blown like alcoholic, and then I just, you know, I go the opposite direction.
00:06:37.920 --> 00:06:44.079
I get sober, but then I'm just like at the gym all the time, just obsessed with working out.
00:06:44.319 --> 00:06:45.680
What would you say to somebody like that?
00:06:45.839 --> 00:06:56.639
Would you be like, okay, now Steve, you gotta you gotta watch your working out, or are there things where it's like, okay, just let him run with it because it's better than drinking all the time or killing himself with drugs?
00:06:56.959 --> 00:06:58.560
I think you've got to thread the needle.
00:06:58.720 --> 00:07:00.800
I think that it's gotta be a fine line.
00:07:01.040 --> 00:07:06.079
I think we've got to make sure that, you know, is there a family involved?
00:07:06.160 --> 00:07:07.279
Yeah, there's a family involved.
00:07:07.360 --> 00:07:10.639
Let's make sure we're making margin and time for our family.
00:07:10.879 --> 00:07:14.000
Are we taking care of our spiritual life as as well as our physical life?
00:07:14.160 --> 00:07:14.720
Okay, we are.
00:07:14.879 --> 00:07:16.000
Okay, that's in check.
00:07:16.240 --> 00:07:25.279
Is the gym the gym can't be interfering with your step work or your meeting life or your life with your sponsor or your ability where you get to be of service?
00:07:25.519 --> 00:07:27.360
All right, we've got that in alignment.
00:07:27.519 --> 00:07:29.600
So, yeah, you like listen, I love working out.
00:07:29.759 --> 00:07:31.519
You love working out, I love working out.
00:07:31.680 --> 00:07:44.000
I'm better when I'm working out, but the workouts can't come before Nicole and the kids, the workouts can't come before my sponsees, the workouts can't come before Christ, the workouts can't come before me going to an AA meeting.
00:07:44.160 --> 00:07:46.720
They can, but it'll be to my detriment.
00:07:47.120 --> 00:07:48.879
Yeah, absolutely.
00:07:49.360 --> 00:07:55.680
And you know, like I've I've been thinking a lot about um, you know, just Jesus Christ and just my my faith.
00:07:55.759 --> 00:08:01.040
And it's like if you're gonna be obsessed with something, you know, be obsessed with Christ.
00:08:01.120 --> 00:08:01.839
I mean, that's me.
00:08:02.160 --> 00:08:10.879
Like you you may not have the same beliefs, you may not believe in God, or there's some other type of power in the universe that you subscribe to, which is fine.
00:08:10.959 --> 00:08:21.920
But I think it's like when we get outside of ourselves and we can focus on a power greater than ourselves, like I think it's a good spot to be.
00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:26.160
But I am I uh yeah, don't threaten me with a good time.
00:08:26.240 --> 00:08:27.920
I'm obsessed with my Lord and Savior.
00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:28.480
I love them.
00:08:28.560 --> 00:08:29.839
I like thinking about them.
00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:33.120
I'm laughing, but I'm laughing in a good way because it makes me happy.
00:08:33.600 --> 00:08:35.279
Um, I think about the Lord a lot.
00:08:35.440 --> 00:08:36.399
I think about him.
00:08:37.200 --> 00:08:45.440
There's times when I'm sort of in between like I'm asleep and I'm awake, or I'm falling asleep, and I I feel like I like like he's there.
00:08:45.600 --> 00:08:54.320
I trust my discernment because I feel like in the appropriate way I hear him and I get good orderly direction, my acronym for God.
00:08:54.559 --> 00:09:08.399
And I and I like I yeah, I'm I'm like caught up with the Lord, like I'm really taken with the Lord and like He loves me and knows me and has time for me and yearns for me, and I serve a jealous God, tells me so, which is beautiful.
00:09:08.639 --> 00:09:16.720
You know, he wants, you know, to be included and and he is so inclusive in my life, and that's a beautiful thing.
00:09:16.799 --> 00:09:22.480
So I I like that part of the solution for my walk and my life and my way.
00:09:22.720 --> 00:09:23.840
Yeah, absolutely.
00:09:24.080 --> 00:09:28.240
Now, just a few minutes ago, I said that I have an addictive personality.
00:09:28.480 --> 00:09:30.559
Do you think that's a real thing?
00:09:30.720 --> 00:09:34.240
Yeah, do you think that's just like people use it as an excuse?
00:09:34.399 --> 00:09:36.240
No, I think there's something else going on.
00:09:36.720 --> 00:09:38.480
No, I'm sorry, I couldn't let you finish.
00:09:38.559 --> 00:09:39.279
You triggered me.
00:09:39.360 --> 00:09:39.919
Good job.
00:09:40.399 --> 00:09:43.679
No, it's really a real, it's for sure a real thing.
00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:46.399
I mean, you and I know each other pretty darn well.
00:09:46.559 --> 00:09:48.799
We have a great relationship, we're very, very close.
00:09:48.960 --> 00:09:52.159
I totally see that stuff in you, which I quite enjoy.
00:09:52.399 --> 00:09:54.320
And I'm should be locked up.
00:09:54.399 --> 00:09:55.600
I mean, for sure.
00:09:55.759 --> 00:10:23.519
Like, I'm all about all of it, and I don't do like when's the last time I minimally did anything, I just don't do that, and it's beautiful, and and then it come becomes about learning and understanding like okay, we know who we are, and we know whose we are, and then the balance comes, and we just keep culling and learning and listening and growing, and it's a beautiful journey, and it's and that's what's all listen.
00:10:23.679 --> 00:10:32.639
This is where I want people in recovery to continue to be turned on and present and a part of.
00:10:33.120 --> 00:10:56.559
You should be in this ongoing massive pursuit of what everything that promotes and provides health and growth, and you should push and read and learn and ask and reach out and love and laugh and live and roll and keep yourself really nimble and going and soak it up.
00:10:56.879 --> 00:11:09.759
People like that are sober, stay sober, keep going, keep blossoming, keep helping others, get fed, find different objectives, and it's a remarkable, remarkable journey.
00:11:10.000 --> 00:11:10.639
Absolutely.
00:11:10.799 --> 00:11:11.679
So, what say you?
00:11:11.759 --> 00:11:12.559
You're listening to this.
00:11:12.720 --> 00:11:14.320
Do you have an addictive personality?
00:11:14.559 --> 00:11:15.679
Do you have thoughts on this?
00:11:15.759 --> 00:11:17.440
What kind of things do you struggle with?
00:11:17.600 --> 00:11:22.879
You can always reach out to us at hello at restored detoxcenters.com.
00:11:23.279 --> 00:11:26.399
We love to hear from our our uh community.
00:11:26.559 --> 00:11:28.320
Uh please, yeah.
00:11:28.399 --> 00:11:30.480
Oh you could always reach out, Steven.
00:11:30.799 --> 00:11:34.639
So great to be back together with you for another episode on the show.
00:11:34.879 --> 00:11:35.279
Thank you.
00:11:35.360 --> 00:11:36.639
This is a really good topic.
00:11:36.799 --> 00:11:38.240
Thank you for bringing this up.
00:11:38.320 --> 00:11:41.840
It gets me, I'm sure you could tell, it gets me excited and it's exciting.
00:11:42.080 --> 00:11:43.519
And I I love the journey.
00:11:43.679 --> 00:11:47.120
I love what we're putting out there, and I really hope we start hearing from more people.
00:11:47.200 --> 00:11:51.200
I hope we start getting to get engaged with more people who are listening.
00:11:51.360 --> 00:11:56.559
And I hope one of these days, and I've said this before, and it's just one of those moments I want to say it now.
00:11:56.799 --> 00:12:03.039
I hope one of these days we can like literally do like a Zoom town hall and get people to listen to the podcast together and have an open forum.
00:12:03.120 --> 00:12:04.320
I think it would be great content.
00:12:04.480 --> 00:12:08.720
I'd love, I'd love for that to somehow come to life in this journey.
00:12:08.799 --> 00:12:10.639
And so if you want to be a part of that, reach out.
00:12:10.799 --> 00:12:11.919
We love you, we're for you.
00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:13.840
Everyone, have a safe and sober day.