From Security to Surrender: A Story of Faith in the Uncertainty

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Welcome back to the Cup of Joy podcast.
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This is your host, amanda Joy, with a very special guest that I hold so near and dear to my heart.
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And today I am super pumped for this episode because I think it's something that, as Christians, we have all struggled with in the past or are currently struggling with, and that is having faith in the uncertainty.
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And I have walked very close with our guest today on just a season where kind of felt like the carpet was ripped from under this person's feet and left with a lot of questions, more questions than answers.
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But through this season where everything was very rocky and just walking in this valley-like place that felt very dark, that felt like the Lord was not present.
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This speaker has a lot of wisdom on just how close in proximity God truly was with this person and just the stories that he has to share.
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But today I have my husband, tyler Rademacher, on the show.
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Do you want to say hi?
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Hello everybody and thank you, amanda, for having me back on the show.
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It's been a little bit and I'm just so honored to be here.
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It's gonna be so fun.
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So before we get started, I just have a random icebreaker question, and that is what is your favorite Bubbler flavor?
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Ooh, that's brutal.
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I would say probably lime watermelon.
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That's up there.
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I also like the pink one and whatever that one is Fantastic.
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Shout out to Bubbler for sponsoring this podcast.
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Bubbler's not sponsoring this podcast yet Yet.
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Keyword yet.
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No, it's so funny because I saw something on this and I'm like I'm so guilty of that that no one actually knows the names of the Bubbler and it's just based off of color, like, oh, my favorite one is the green one, or my favorite flavor is the pink one, and you actually know the names.
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I do.
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Or maybe you don't.
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The pink one.
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It's something nectar.
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It's good though.
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It is good, I like the pomegranate one.
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That one's good and I do like the watermelon.
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Ooh, yeah.
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That's so funny.
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That's so funny.
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But yeah, it's funny because we decided to record.
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Well, I had asked you to come on to the podcast in the middle of church service, so were you surprised by our topic today or just had any hesitations on what we're going to be talking about?
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and why I asked you to be the one to speak on this.
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Well, let me paint the picture right.
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We're in the middle of service and this absolute fire sermon all about kind of our vocation and where God's calling us to minister.
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And the main point of the message is that in discovering more of God's character and shaping our character to be more like him, that's where we'll discover where God is calling us to minister.
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And it was a really good message.
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But Amanda hands me this notebook with a bunch of questions on it and then asking me to be on the podcast today and it definitely caught me off guard.
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But I was so very excited to be asked to be brought on oh, it's so special.
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Thank you for saying yes.
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I really loved um today, just again like having the guest speaker bethany von.
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What was her last name?
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Stern bethany von?
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Was it sternberg?
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that sounds about right I think I actually have her written down, steinberg steinberg she's phenomenal, uh, but I love just her message on um also, like she started off the sermon with like some statistics on what was it the difference between doing your job with passion versus purpose?
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Correct, and it's very convicting to me because growing up you you always hear like follow your passions, when really what carries you through is your God-given purpose.
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And so there's definitely some reflection too with the podcast, like is this a passion or is this a purpose?
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And I think it's a little bit of both for sure.
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But purpose is truly what carries you through those low times, and I think that for this past season I've definitely been driven with passion and that lack of can kind of cause you to, I don't know, stop in the turmoil versus a purpose I feel like can really carry you through the lows.
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But yeah, so before we get started, a question that I have for you, just so the audience can get to know you a little bit more.
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And your testimony is like who are you and well, I know you're my husband, but who are you and what is your testimony when it comes to, like your salvation in Christ?
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Well, I would say I am a extrovert.
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I love people to me just for a heart that, especially for people that are around the ages of 18 through 35, 35 to 40, kind of that young adult age I really think that God's given me a purpose that seeks out to just help people along their journeys with life and every aspect of life, you know, when it comes to finances, when it comes to your career and marriage and relationships and friendships and all those aspects that can really entangle us and bring us closer to the Lord.
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As we seek that out during our 20s and 30s, the world's going to pull us in so many different directions.
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So my passion is to help young people channel their passions and these relationships and help them all focus back on one thing, and that is the Lord, that is Jesus and um, when we have Jesus by our side, it makes our life so much more meaningful and purposeful, and I think I'm trying to create a ministry, along with the Lord and um, helping young people to do this.
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That's so beautiful, and what is your personal testimony to get to where you are today?
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So I grew up in the Catholic church and that really gave me a foundational faith and to my adulthood then I ended up reconnecting more so with my faith once my best friend came back from Colorado, jason, and he brought me to Rochester Assembly and it was the first time I ever tangibly felt the Holy Spirit in such a way that almost brought me to my knees and it was just literally the physical presence of the Holy Spirit, something that I never even knew that I needed, but discovered it in a place that was completely different from what I had known before, and I saw the hunger for this knowledge of his word.
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And growing up in a Catholic church, you rely on a priest that is the source of that knowledge.
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That's for the priest to know all about God's word.
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That's about the priest to know about these special gifts of the Holy Spirit.
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When really it's for the layman, it's for us common men.
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You know the people out in the congregation that make up the body of Christ.
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The word of the Lord is for them too.
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And so when I discovered that, I started to truly discover my purpose and truly discover who God's character is and who he's called me to be.
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And so it is for everybody, and I would consider myself a Christian that is kind of open to wherever the Holy spirit's leading.
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As far as denomination goes, I think I'm very open to just following the lord and I'm a I'm a christ follower, I am um a believer, and that's what I've considered myself being, and it's led me now to a season where um being, and it's led me now to a season where I'll get into it some more.
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But I had a little bit of a shaken up, you know, from the Lord, and he's finally helped me to get to a spot where I have decided to take a full plunge into a ministry that he's calling me to, and we can get into that more.
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But I think I'm at a spot now where I'm deciding to go back to school and seek out that master's degree in Bible and theology, something that's so far off course from what I went to school for originally, and I'm excited to see what the Lord has in store.
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That's amazing.
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Yeah, Thank you for sharing.
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I think that just um, even just in this past year, watching you grow into that, and that's kind of what I want to talk about.
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So right now we're into the month of August and I think you you and I can both agree this has been one of the craziest years it's been a roller coaster.
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honestly, it's crazy.
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So let's start back to the beginning of the year, in January.
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So I see you're wearing your Girl Dad hat.
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So I see you're wearing your girl dad hat.
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Do you want to talk about what happened on your birthday in the beginning of the year 2025?
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Talk about God writing your story.
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Nothing beats it when you allow God to literally write your story right into the lines of your life.
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Things like this happen.
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So I'm coming home from work, it's my birthday and you know I'm I'm expecting a wonderful evening with friends, family and nothing more, nothing less.
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I just I love people.
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I love my people, and so I'm getting ready for a fun night going out to one of my favorite lobster restaurants up in the city smack shack, shout out um.
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And we are about to go, but first amanda's like come on in the house, you know, and um no, you know, when you got here, like when you got to the house, you were sitting in the car for like 15 minutes.
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Oh, that's classic.
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I don't know if you're on the phone or if you're scrolling, but like I was so eager for you to get home and then you were just in the driveway for like what felt like eternity.
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No, that sounds about right.
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So eventually I do get out and you're taking me down the hallway and you tell me that you have a surprise for me and I can't remember what I said to you um, I think you were thinking two different surprises.
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Oh yeah we're heading to the bedroom and for all my married folk out out there, you know, is you're like oh am I gonna get?
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lucky, like it's my birthday.
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But then you said is there a treat from harper?
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Because you thought harper right, that's right.
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And so our dog harper, she uh, once in a while she's a dog she's never had an accident in our bedroom, but but it wouldn't put it past her.
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Yeah, or past you, anyway, yeah yeah.
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So I thought it was going to be a surprise, like, oh, look at what Harper did.
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And then I'm like, oh, is this another type of surprise?
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And then we get to the bedroom and laid out our pictures of Amanda and I through our last basically year and a half of being together and just flooded with memories, and there in the bed was a card that said happy birthday, dad.
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With a onesie next to it.
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And I still couldn't put it together.
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Folks, I literally like, just absent-mindedly, like what the heck does that mean?
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Like dad what?
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And so I opened this card and come to my realization that I was going to be a dad.
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And those of you that have been hit with that news, you know it just hits you like a ton of bricks.
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I started bawling my eyes out and I I was just in disbelief.
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I, I couldn't believe it.
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It was the most surreal moment.
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What a gift on my birthday.
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And um, couldn't have been any better yeah, it's pretty crazy.
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I watched you go through like four motions all at once shock, Shock, Like you were like yeah, you at first was like, are you serious?
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And then the tears and then the gratitude.
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And then realizing because two days prior to this we had set up our financial plan with a financial advisor.
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We had previously I had been setting up a maternity account for the past year and we're going to use that to pay our deck off.
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And so when the time came and we were going to be pregnant, we would just restart this account.
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And so you did throw in there at the end, like, how are we going to pay off our deck?
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Well, I think that's the thing it's like.
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The Lord has a funny way of interrupting the plans we think that he has for us right, and so what a great interruption.
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Yeah, it was so precious and here we are now pretty much a month away.
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It's crazy.
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Less than a month.
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Less than a month.
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That's so wild.
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Okay, so January you find out you're going to be a dad, and prior I would say a little bit prior to that, you were struggling with work a little bit.
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But then you have this incredible blessing to start the new year.
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Can you kind of talk about what was going on behind the scenes, uh, with your job?
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Because, uh, fast forward, three months later, uh, you had decided to leave a very from the world standards of a very wonderful opportunity with wonderful benefits, steady pay, 12-week paternity.
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From the world's eyes, this is a job that you hold on to until you retire and you and I both had decided it was best for you to leave.
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Do you want to talk about just that decision and how you walked into a season of just vulnerability with the Lord?
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Yeah, I don't know if it was necessarily like my decision.
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I guess some might say you get kind of booted out of there, slowly moved out of there, but I will say it was a process of surrender and being open to what anything the Lord had in store.
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Going to stay there for you know all 20 years that I had to put in there until I'm 50, because I could retire early and receive all these great benefits.
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And you had mentioned that you thought I needed to be a little bit more prayerful because I think you saw a calling over my life that I was ignoring.
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And the great thing about the Lord is he's looking for our hearts to be surrendered.
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And I think there was a moment on the way to work, I was so anxious and felt all this weight because I was holding it so tightly and I was finally like all right, lord, like you know, your will be done.
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If I'm supposed to be here, I'll be here.
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If not, help me slowly find my way out of here so to speak and it was like boom, instantly, Like I had gotten called into my boss's office and basically told me, or gave me a heads up, that he was removing me from one of my work areas because he didn't feel as though my performance was up to par.
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And you know, there's a lot of pride.
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I think that comes into when you hear something like that pride.
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I think that comes into when you hear something like that.
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I really had to kind of lay it down, you know, and, um, humble myself and I'm like, okay, you know, like it's a bummer to hear, but here we are and um, you know, just trying to take it as it comes.
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But he said no worries, You're not going to lose anything, You're not getting punished.
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Uh, you're not going to lose anything, you're not getting punished.
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Uh, you're just getting removed for a temporary period.
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And I'm like, okay, monday that was hard.
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Oh yeah, that was on.
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That was on our valentine that was on a valentine's day.
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It made a really rough, so you came home completely distraught, like you were feeling everything, don't, don't get me wrong.
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I sound good now, but yeah, I was in I had never seen you that broken down before yeah, I mean, it's a confidence killer.
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you know, you take pride in your work and your craft and I certainly do, as a lab tech I think I'm a good lab tech but, um, there was definitely some differences in opinion and differences in the way that maybe he saw where I needed to be at this point and so, yeah, I came home pretty distraught.
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I wouldn't say it ruined the Valentine's, but definitely put a damper on it and made things very difficult.
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And you know, I think it's one of those human things.
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Again, right, we put such an emphasis on days like Valentine's Day but in reality, when you're surrendered to the Lord and see a bigger picture for your life through God's eyes, I think it allows space for even the hard days to come, on the important days in a worldly sense, such as Valentine's Day.
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And so next Monday or the very next week, I get an email from HR basically telling me that I lost my bonus, and it was a very significant amount yeah, it wasn't like when you think bonus, you almost think like my brain goes to like a few, like low hundreds a paycheck.
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But we're, we were talking.
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I mean that was like a significant percentage of your like a significant percentage of your pay.
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Yeah, it was enough amount to probably settle that deck and your maternity all together.
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And that was during a time where I mean, this was around Valentine's Day.
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We found out that we were pregnant in January.
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At this point, you had picked up a second job, that you were working super, super part time to just have a little bit extra income so that we could get ahead, take care of the deck while creating our maternity account and or I should say like pouring more into our maternity to prepare us.
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And they did know that and then, without warning, took away your entire bonus.
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Now I'm managing this right.
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So my world is just getting shaken up left and right, and then it gets to a point where I start to wonder if they're going to try to bring me back on those areas or somehow earn back.
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My bonus just kept seeming to be kicked down the road further and further to eventually about maybe two months later getting a proposal written by my boss to demote me from a lab tech to a officer.
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And that's just yeah, as your wife was really hard to watch, because I know that wherever God has you, you pour your everything.
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And we kind of talked about it and, like you are, what did you call it?
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Like the locker boy.
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I would say, like I'm a locker room player.
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The locker room like hyping everyone up.
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Yeah, I feel like when it comes to my job, especially there, I was probably the lowest on the totem pole with the least amount of experience as a generalist.
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And when you're coming into a place where everyone has at least five plus years of experience has at least five plus years of experience versus you know, maybe the five years as a specialist, but you know not nothing like a generalist um, it can be really hard to pick up on some of those skills that you haven't touched in five plus years, and then, on top of it, in areas that you've never worked in in a lab to begin with.
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not to mention the training was subpar not trying to tear anybody apart, tear anybody down, but it's less like you know.
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A lot of it I had to figure out for myself and you're working in a prison which.
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I'm sure there was more spiritual warfare going on than you even realized.
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Oh, 100%, and just God's protection over your mind going to work every day and physically being in such a dark place where you really need to have a light there.
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And what's beautiful is that you didn't allow just the atmosphere around you to change or shift the Holy Spirit working in you.
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But I definitely saw your light getting dimmer through those two months in between, losing the bonus and working in the unknown, and you're not really someone who has anxiety but boy but during that time you carried a lot of anxiety every single day and, like the sunday, scaries were every single week 100.
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Yeah, it was very difficult to go into work knowing that you have a boss that does not like you, is not for you, does not see that does not like you, is not for you, does not see the best in you and is trying to basically use you as a scapegoat for certain things that are happening at work.
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So eventually, yes, I got to a point where I had to stand before the warden who is in charge of the prison and pretty much defend myself for my job.
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And your character.
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And my character Because you know, along with it it really truly brings you down and you feel a lack of, I guess, kind of respect on your name.
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So going into the warden defending myself.
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And then there was a waiting period of probably another month even after that, where it was just anxiety-filled, waiting for this decision to come from the warden to find out if I'm going to be demoted, just continuing to have punishment after punishment dished out at me and everything that's being really punitive.
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And it was starting to spill into other areas of your life where you were lacking, now, confidence and not being able to trust your own ability in husband, as you know, a future father, um, and just even my own responsibilities at home, like it definitely wears on you and yeah so now we are entering into the end of april, we're wrapping up the end of april and it's now my birthday.
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And that was the same day that we were going to find out the gender of our baby, which, again, god's in the details.
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How cool 20 weeks later puts us at exactly another birthday, for a really fun surprise.
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And the day, that Friday, leading into that weekend, you had discovered that the warden had made a decision and you had decided to go one more week like weekend to find out.
00:27:25.954 --> 00:27:37.123
So you went into that weekend not knowing I think that was kind of the right move, preparing my mind for whatever is decided, as well as just being able to be present.
00:27:39.691 --> 00:27:55.002
So we find out we're having a baby girl and a few days into the week you meet with the warden and he tells you he tells me that they are demoting me.
00:27:55.002 --> 00:27:57.396
And what does that look like?
00:27:58.451 --> 00:28:11.340
I would no longer be a lab tech in the position of a lab tech, but instead be brought on as an officer, and it would take place pretty much immediately.
00:28:11.340 --> 00:28:38.644
I would finish out the rest of my week so I think that was given to me on like a Monday, wednesday, and then I would literally be an officer by next Monday, and that would be odd shifts, so evening or overnight, as well as overtime, and not just overtime but like mandated overtime and just not a very good situation your pay would be cut.
00:28:38.970 --> 00:28:58.974
Oh, pay was cut tremendously actually, and so, with some guidance, I had already started pursuing a job application towards Mayo, which I guess I was just really praying and banking on the Lord to open up that door opportunity for me.
00:28:58.974 --> 00:29:16.130
I just, I think I had a sense of um damaged pride and um, and just having to face my you know, ex coworkers every day coming in and knowing I'm not part of the team anymore.
00:29:16.130 --> 00:29:36.425
I had decided to leave, and some might say that was a understandable decision, but in my humanness I couldn't help but feel guilty for also leaving at a time when my wife is pregnant and we don't have benefits then.
00:29:36.425 --> 00:29:49.079
So it's just a very hard decision and, um, I still wonder if I made the right decision, but it's a decision that I made and I stuck with.
00:29:49.381 --> 00:29:55.382
So and so, then, that entered into.
00:29:55.382 --> 00:30:06.742
I would say, the summer has had three separate seasons the season that you were battling the prison, figuratively and literally.
00:30:06.742 --> 00:30:07.384
Mm-hmm.
00:30:08.130 --> 00:30:20.124
And then entering that season where this is really where we're walking in the uncertainty, where this is really where we're walking in the uncertainty where we had a lot of decisions that we had to make, what our birthing plan was going to look like.
00:30:20.124 --> 00:30:39.027
You know, we were going to OMC and now, without insurance, are we going to be pursuing Mayo with the hope that you get accepted into this new job role, or are we having an at-home birth?
00:30:39.027 --> 00:30:57.987
Another thing that we were really struggling with, too is, I think, just like our finances and what that looked like, the uncertainty of just our income and where the money was going to stream from in order to stay afloat.
00:30:57.987 --> 00:31:01.657
Can you think of anything else that we were kind of?
00:31:02.011 --> 00:31:06.731
The rental situation yeah that's a whole another story and a half.
00:31:06.731 --> 00:31:35.885
But yes, we have a rental and, unfortunately, some tenants that really put us through the ringer, and so we were also entering into a time where they were leaving and leaving us with, I mean, thousands of dollars of fixes to bring the home back to a livable place.
00:31:35.885 --> 00:31:40.028
Uh, so that was another like financial stress.
00:31:40.028 --> 00:31:44.055
Um, is there anything else you can really think of?
00:31:45.376 --> 00:32:13.875
um, I think you nailed it pretty well I think the big one for me personally, was the birthing plan letting go of what I thought that would look like versus what god had in mind, uh, so we ended up going so all of may, all of june, and then it was july 14th 14th, so middle of july.
00:32:13.976 --> 00:32:16.961
So it was two and a half months, 10 weeks.
00:32:16.961 --> 00:32:18.163
Yeah.
00:32:18.329 --> 00:32:29.538
Which doesn't sound like a very long time now that we're on the other end of it, but 10 weeks when you're in, it felt like an eternity.
00:32:29.538 --> 00:32:32.042
With what we were going through.
00:32:32.042 --> 00:32:43.785
With what we were going going through, um, how, now that you're on the other side of it, how do you see god moving in each of those seasons?
00:32:43.785 --> 00:32:51.237
Can you also give a summary, uh, of what it looked like during that time off in between your two jobs?
00:32:52.278 --> 00:33:01.554
so it gave me a whole new perspective for those of you that are in between jobs or are seeking out work.
00:33:01.554 --> 00:33:33.579
You know my my heart goes out to you and just know that, like those efforts you're making to find odd jobs, I have a whole new respect for people that are in that season, because most people are not in that season on purpose there's usually external circumstances and it gave me a whole new perspective and respect for those that are in that season, and so for me, it was finding the odd jobs.
00:33:33.579 --> 00:34:04.077
Man and I made a cleaning business and we did that together, and what's so cool is God opens up doors for our baby for daycare, and so God uses those situations.
00:34:04.077 --> 00:35:05.643
I also got an opportunity mowing lawns and doing landscaping, and that was amazing because it truly brought in a lot of income, a lot of new connections and, um, it's uh been something that was pretty sustainable even through my first couple of weeks at Mayo here, still finishing up jobs on the weekends and bring them some extra income, then bring in some extra income then and then, on top of it, the last place I sought out work was with Carter, who has a card detailing business located out in Oronoco, and I worked for, uh, a month or so and um, just doing these odd jobs and then eventually, um, towards the end and wrapping it up, um, I ended up getting in a car accident.
00:35:07.291 --> 00:35:21.706
Um, this car accident, I would say definitely, like just when you thought you couldn't get kicked while you were down any further, just kind of solidified it.
00:35:21.949 --> 00:35:28.677
I'm like Lord, like I feel like I'm getting kicked while I'm already down, like what else could I possibly lose?
00:35:28.677 --> 00:35:43.036
I mean, you guys, like my car was totaled, completely gone, like undriveable, and what's so cool about God is, even in a situation like that, he redeems it.
00:35:43.036 --> 00:35:50.219
I have never felt so close to my wife, especially in these last months or moments with each other.
00:35:50.219 --> 00:36:01.302
If it just being us two being able to drive into work with her every day, it's been one of the biggest blessings so god can truly take what the enemy meant for evil and turn it to good.
00:36:01.302 --> 00:36:23.612
And then, um, wrapping this kind of season up, um, this is new opportunity with with male, um, I would say it's really solidified, um, I guess you could say, my confidence and rebuilding it.
00:36:23.612 --> 00:36:34.739
I know I'm a good tech, I'm knowing I'm, I'm, I'm good at what I do, and just the amount of people and other new coworkers that have spoken this over me.
00:36:35.742 --> 00:37:04.903
Um, I guess you could say it's just really helped me to kind of find my mojo back and solidified more confidence in me and we'll talk about a opportunity that god opened up for me um, getting the job with Mayo at a crucial time and allowing that to be a source of income, especially now that I am going back to school, which I can kind of get into more.
00:37:04.903 --> 00:37:16.619
But something that I had kept at arm's length for a very long time was the call to ministry that God had been calling me towards.
00:37:16.619 --> 00:37:25.443
It's something that I would say was, oh, that's for that person, that isn't for me.
00:37:25.443 --> 00:37:27.289
I'm not there yet.
00:37:27.289 --> 00:37:42.579
In my faith journey to be a pastor, to be in ministry, I would keep it at arm's distance until you know about the fourth time, fifth time, of someone speaking it over your life.
00:37:42.579 --> 00:37:47.740
If you don't get it by then the Lord's going to shake up some things.
00:37:48.110 --> 00:37:53.780
What's funny is that that time you did accept it, you said you know what, Amanda, let's do this.
00:37:53.780 --> 00:37:57.831
And do you want to know what you said?
00:37:57.831 --> 00:37:58.954
The timeline would be.
00:38:00.956 --> 00:38:03.822
Yes, when I retired.
00:38:04.503 --> 00:38:20.336
You said we're going to do this, we are going to pursue ministry after I retire in 20 years and then, within that same month, retire in 20 years and then, within that same month, god's like, no, you ain't, you literally took your job.
00:38:20.336 --> 00:38:20.838
So it's funny.
00:38:20.838 --> 00:38:23.887
It's like some things that happen in our lives.
00:38:23.887 --> 00:38:34.715
It's so easy for us to blame the devil when really it's from God and it's not that it's, you know, bad things are from God.
00:38:34.715 --> 00:38:38.057
It's just these opportunities that happen.
00:38:38.057 --> 00:39:05.494
The valley, like God, has really been watering and tending to you and through all of it you've been able to be a huge support in my life, going through pregnancy and what's just.
00:39:05.494 --> 00:39:09.362
My personal walk has been in.
00:39:09.362 --> 00:39:24.284
That is, even when you felt like you were at your most empty, that you still were pursuing the Lord and he was pouring into you and you were able to still give to me when you felt like you had nothing.
00:39:25.891 --> 00:39:26.871
I think it's beautiful.
00:39:26.871 --> 00:40:05.925
A big series that our church, echo, has been going through is basically it's called gardens right Made to garden Made to garden, and one of the big parables that keeps getting brought up is the parable of the sower and how he, the farmer, is sowing seeds on different soils and you have the, you know, shallow you have the rich soil you have the rocky soil and the hard soil, where it just gets gathered or eaten right away.
00:40:06.769 --> 00:40:16.302
And I would say there was definitely an opportunity for me to be in this shallow state where, you know, I.
00:40:16.302 --> 00:40:23.561
I think there was opportunities for me to go screw it Like I'm done, like this is absolutely ridiculous.
00:40:23.561 --> 00:40:25.851
Like Lord, you're not showing up.
00:40:25.851 --> 00:40:33.393
Like you, you're messing everything up, you're you're shaking everything, you're shaking the foundations, but where are you?
00:40:33.393 --> 00:40:43.349
And I think there's a humanness to be able to, I think, be, sometimes feel out those emotions with God.
00:40:43.349 --> 00:40:48.757
I think there's a healthy relationship to have with the Lord, where it's like we can be.
00:40:48.757 --> 00:40:53.405
And it's okay to be angry with God in situations.
00:40:53.405 --> 00:41:08.164
Okay to be angry with God in situations, but there's a difference between walking away and working through those emotions and knowing what a good father he is and putting our faith that he's going to carry us through this season 100%.
00:41:08.224 --> 00:41:15.083
Even thinking about the car accident how easy it is to be upset that you took something away from me, god.
00:41:15.083 --> 00:41:43.405
But to really see that that was our last six days of not having health insurance before you started your job and seeing God's protection over your life not only just your physical protection, also our financial protection, that we weren't hit with all these medical bills but really the important part of it is that you walked away without a scratch.
00:41:43.405 --> 00:41:50.576
You know 100% a.
00:41:50.576 --> 00:42:00.547
You know scrapped car, that you're okay and that it was our commuter and not our other vehicle.
00:42:00.706 --> 00:42:20.679
And that you weren't in the car yeah, that I wasn't in the car yeah so you know, it's like little things like that throughout this entire time it puts things in perspective and it kind of it puts things in perspective and it kind of shows you, it kind of helps you re-evaluate what's important in your life too.
00:42:20.679 --> 00:42:25.442
You know the real things the things that matter the most.
00:42:26.202 --> 00:42:34.650
And through all this, also just seeing God provide for us oh my gosh, financially Incredibly much, oh my gosh.
00:42:34.670 --> 00:42:35.512
incredibly much, oh my gosh.
00:42:35.512 --> 00:42:38.213
You know something that Amanda would tell me she's like.
00:42:38.213 --> 00:42:48.324
You know it might not be in abundance and it's exactly what we need.
00:42:48.985 --> 00:42:50.666
Mm-hmm.
00:42:50.666 --> 00:43:01.260
Yeah, God may not be giving to you in a way that's the abundance, but he is giving you exactly what you need and nothing more.
00:43:01.280 --> 00:43:02.222
And nothing less.
00:43:02.222 --> 00:43:05.186
So I guess you could say that is an abundance then, right?
00:43:05.530 --> 00:43:08.139
Just maybe not what the world calls abundance.
00:43:09.469 --> 00:43:25.465
And I tell Tyler this and I remind myself this too but if God wants to bless you with a $10,000 check, you'll get that check, and if he wants to bless you with $100 to cover the groceries for the week, he'll bless you with $100.
00:43:25.750 --> 00:44:01.458
And more time than not, it's in those smaller amounts, but it makes the biggest impact and I am very grateful for you taking a step out in faith and saying yes to God and leaving this job, because it has created, like you said, connections with different neighbors and opening up doors for even just like we talked about for our little juniper to be going to daycare so that I can continue to work part-time.
00:44:01.458 --> 00:44:43.802
It has created an even deeper dependence on the Lord when it comes to something like finances that we have no control over, that we have no control over, and seeing your work ethics just continue to strengthen and to grow and just seeing this different I don't want to say different version of you, but in a lot of ways, like you've just stepped up in ways I've never seen before, now that you're working this job, uh, before, when you were working at the prison, I think too, you were just so emotionally drained yeah, oh, 100%.
00:44:44.063 --> 00:44:50.235
Not trying to lean on excuses, but that that could very much so.
00:44:50.235 --> 00:44:50.695
Be it.
00:44:50.695 --> 00:44:53.980
I'm on a very healthier place now.
00:44:53.980 --> 00:44:54.880
Be it.
00:44:54.880 --> 00:44:55.842
I'm on a very healthier place now.
00:44:55.842 --> 00:44:57.244
I love my new lab.
00:44:57.523 --> 00:45:09.773
It's been a good overall experience and I'll be starting school here soon as well, so just in a really healthy spot, praise God, that's beautiful.
00:45:09.773 --> 00:45:28.304
So through then, these last nine months, is there a specific place in scripture, maybe a verse that you have been meditating on or something that has been really just bringing you hope through just a dark time?
00:45:31.110 --> 00:45:40.043
Yeah, I've been reading through Isaiah and I remember when the Lord said Tyler read through Isaiah.
00:45:40.043 --> 00:45:40.885
I'm like why?
00:45:40.885 --> 00:45:42.724
Tyler, read through Isaiah.
00:45:42.724 --> 00:45:43.230
I love you.
00:45:43.230 --> 00:45:45.693
I'm like, why read through Isaiah?
00:45:45.693 --> 00:45:47.655
Like I really struggle with the prophets.
00:45:47.655 --> 00:45:55.443
But what I mean I struggle with them it's just like a lot of it is kind of repetitive.
00:45:55.443 --> 00:45:58.045
It's all about warning too.
00:45:58.329 --> 00:46:01.619
Let's say, if it's repetitive, that means that it's worth paying attention to.
00:46:01.639 --> 00:46:04.094
Yeah, that's true too, If God's repeating himself.
00:46:04.155 --> 00:46:05.077
You better listen.
00:46:05.840 --> 00:46:06.340
That's true.
00:46:06.340 --> 00:46:10.755
A lot of it is warning the Israelites, warning Judah.
00:46:10.755 --> 00:46:29.724
Like hey, you guys are running a mech, you guys are mucking me in and you guys are disobeying me, you guys are idolizing and um, not you know, you guys are not following me.
00:46:29.724 --> 00:46:37.143
And he's like, hey, I'm gonna bring in Syria, I'm going to bring in the Babylonians and take you guys down.
00:46:37.143 --> 00:46:41.494
And then there's this message.
00:46:41.494 --> 00:46:47.644
That's this doom and gloom for this group of people that God calls his own.
00:46:48.889 --> 00:46:53.481
And looking at it in my life and this is straight from the Holy Spirit.
00:46:53.481 --> 00:47:09.021
Right now, the Holy Spirit's just even given me revelation as I'm speaking this I think it's a course correction for his people Overall, a message of, hey, like I love you guys and you're not following me.
00:47:09.021 --> 00:47:11.858
Course correction for my own life.
00:47:11.858 --> 00:47:18.534
Like, hey, like I called you to ministry, I need to shake up your world, I need to get your attention, I love you.
00:47:18.534 --> 00:47:26.762
But then here comes this message of hope too and I guess that's what I was going to focus on was Isaiah 40.
00:47:26.762 --> 00:47:30.170
I'm not going to read the whole thing because it's quite long.
00:47:30.170 --> 00:47:51.922
However, it is a beautiful message of comfort for God's people after all this doom and gloom, after God is literally speaking like hey, I'm going to take you down with Babylon, with Assyria, I'm going to rededicate and tell you guys my love for you.
00:47:51.922 --> 00:48:08.081
So it says comfort, comfort my people, says your God, speak tenderly to Jerusalem and proclaim her that her hard service has been completed, that her sin has been paid for, that she had received from the Lord's hand double for all her sins.
00:48:08.601 --> 00:48:15.329
A voice of one calling in the wilderness prepare the way for the Lord, make straight in the desert a highway for god.
00:48:15.329 --> 00:48:29.570
Every valley shall be raised up, every mountain, a hill made low, the rough ground shall become level, the rugged places a plain, and the glory of the lord will be revealed and all the people will see it together.
00:48:29.570 --> 00:48:41.471
For the mouth of the lord has spoken and it goes on to say that he's going to be tending to his garden, to his people.
00:48:41.471 --> 00:48:53.802
He describes the Israelite people as this grass and how he is watering the flowers amongst the grass in their field and that he's going to be tending to them.
00:48:53.802 --> 00:48:56.831
After all, this ruin is going to be made.
00:48:57.152 --> 00:49:15.056
It's a beautiful poem, almost poetic, to how God still sees and loves his people, how God still saw and sees me through the season where, yeah, you know I was shooken up, but I know God is still watering and he's a good God.
00:49:15.056 --> 00:49:15.697
A good god.
00:49:15.697 --> 00:49:23.099
Another really cool um kind of transition with that is this song that amanda and I are obsessed with.
00:49:23.099 --> 00:49:25.842
Um, yeah, it's called.
00:49:25.842 --> 00:49:26.869
What is it called?
00:49:27.891 --> 00:49:36.163
you're putting me on the spot I can link it in the show notes, but I really think it's just called Flowers by.
00:49:36.163 --> 00:49:38.266
Do you know the artist?
00:49:38.266 --> 00:49:41.657
I don't I can't picture her name.
00:49:42.530 --> 00:50:05.184
But it's basically a song that's talking about how God is watering, you know, and just this beautiful imagery everything from church to the song, to the imagery in isaiah of just god, literally just watering and taking care of his people and this song is because it's.
00:50:06.711 --> 00:50:32.956
It's really talking about this desperate prayer and asking god, like why he's keeping her where she's at and sharing that like in the valley is where the flowers grow, and towards the end is then her writing it up in a grateful prayer and saying thank you God for keeping me where I was at, because now she's.
00:50:33.237 --> 00:50:46.983
Because now she's out of the valley and can see what God walked her through to get to where she's at, and it turned into just this huge gratitude and so now shifting.
00:50:46.983 --> 00:50:56.599
How can we have a heart posture of gratitude while still being in the valley, which I think is something that we could talk about for hours?
00:50:56.619 --> 00:51:16.925
So, definitely a future episode, but I think you really did a good job at summarizing kind of what these past few months have looked like and what God has brought you through and how it all led to you saying yes and continuing to say yes.
00:51:16.925 --> 00:51:30.320
The other really cool thing is when you did decide, yes, that you are going to pursue school like the school accepted you and you also got accepted in Mayo the same morning.
00:51:31.432 --> 00:51:33.235
Yeah, that's true, I never thought of that.
00:51:33.652 --> 00:51:36.010
I never reflected on that Within 45 minutes apart.
00:51:37.494 --> 00:52:17.780
I think it was just really God setting the stage for what our next season of life is going to look like, and thank God for a new source of income and thank God for, hopefully, the place where I'm going to be edumacated on uh, you know more so of the knowledge and um background in theology to hopefully facilitating the ministry that he has in store for me.
00:52:18.271 --> 00:52:25.318
Do you feel like there's a word that pops out for what your word of the year would be after everything that you've kind of walked in?
00:52:28.952 --> 00:52:46.233
The Holy Spirit just spoke surrender, surrender and um, I think the cool part is is like I think that's what god is.
00:52:46.233 --> 00:52:48.896
I would argue that's not just a word for the last year.
00:52:48.916 --> 00:53:08.626
I would say that's been a word for the last for my for my, you know, I'm 29 right now and going to be 30 in less than half a year, and I look at my life and what God was trying to show me and I would say it's to be surrendered and being open.
00:53:08.626 --> 00:53:10.978
I've lost a lot of things.
00:53:10.978 --> 00:53:16.362
I've been through a lot of different relationships, a lot of different friendships.
00:53:16.362 --> 00:53:32.739
I've been through ups and downs of um different seasons of uh losing people along the way and just being truly open-handed for everything that I have uh received.
00:53:32.739 --> 00:53:34.661
God giveth and he taketh.
00:53:35.521 --> 00:53:42.856
And I think the cool part about it is when we are surrendered, it is leaving room for God to work.
00:53:42.856 --> 00:53:52.396
It's leaving room for God to allow his will to be done rather than our own, which will always be the better option.
00:53:52.396 --> 00:54:05.534
And it's led to my life what it is now, that it's brought along an amazing wife, someone that I could not do life without.
00:54:05.534 --> 00:54:40.597
It's led to just the position of being in the community that I am now and the place of work that I am now and my, obviously, the child that is going to be here in less than a month and the beauty that is Juniper Joy, our future daughter here, or I should say, our current daughter here.
00:54:40.597 --> 00:54:50.777
We love her so much, and I think it's just this open-handedness with everything that allows us to truly be in a posture of gratitude.
00:54:50.777 --> 00:54:56.483
Gratitude and surrender to what god has for each season of life.
00:54:56.483 --> 00:55:08.016
And um, there is truly a season for everything, um, just as it says in um ecclesiastes, thank you.
00:55:08.557 --> 00:55:30.215
There's a time for everything under the sun, and I feel like I have truly been placed on this earth to experience it for myself, so that, when I do get into my role of ministry, that I can share what god has shown me through these seasons that's beautiful, would you?
00:55:31.175 --> 00:55:37.123
uh, before just wrapping up, would you like to pray over our listener today?
00:55:39.266 --> 00:55:58.501
I'd love to, lord, I pray for the person on the other side of the earphones that, whatever season that they are in, that you would have a purpose for it and that they would learn to be more surrendered each and every day, to being open to your will, that you would have a purpose for it and that they would learn to be more surrendered each and every day, to being open to your will.
00:55:58.501 --> 00:56:02.806
Your will is the best will, lord, for our lives.
00:56:02.806 --> 00:56:05.295
It is what's going to bring us meaning.
00:56:05.295 --> 00:56:13.297
It's what's going to allow us to learn more of your character, to be shapen and to be made in your image.
00:56:13.538 --> 00:56:33.896
Lord, I pray and ask for that listener that is on the other side that you would speak into each of their situations and what they're going into, lord, and I pray and ask that you would just continue to pour out meaning and just teach them, humble them, lord, and just teach them.
00:56:33.896 --> 00:57:00.264
Humble them, lord, humble them to get to a place, lord, where it is a true act of surrender and allowing space for you to move and we thank you for moving in and out of our lives, lord, and just being the rock and the provider, jehovah Jireh, through each and every season.
00:57:00.264 --> 00:57:06.838
We love you, we're here to serve you, we're here to glorify you each and every day, lord Amen.
00:57:06.838 --> 00:57:08.782
Amen, you said it touched me.
00:57:09.251 --> 00:57:10.956
Aw, that's so beautiful.
00:57:10.956 --> 00:57:11.539
Thank you, honey.
00:57:11.539 --> 00:57:15.275
The Holy Spirit is amazing well.
00:57:15.295 --> 00:57:21.775
Thank you for saying yes to being on the podcast today.
00:57:21.775 --> 00:57:31.358
Thank you for helping me find fresh batteries and not letting that be a problem, yeah, reason to not record that's what I'm here for, dear.
00:57:31.358 --> 00:57:32.840
No barking dogs today.
00:57:32.860 --> 00:57:33.862
No barking dogs.
00:57:33.862 --> 00:57:36.525
No crying babies yet no crying babies yet.
00:57:36.525 --> 00:57:38.416
So it's been good.
00:57:38.416 --> 00:57:41.719
I'm going to put the question right back on you.
00:57:41.719 --> 00:57:46.838
What have you taken away, I guess, from this season?
00:57:46.838 --> 00:57:47.822
Just in one word.
00:57:48.692 --> 00:57:50.250
Taken away from this season.
00:57:50.329 --> 00:57:55.021
Yeah, you asked me to what is my word, for you know.
00:57:55.210 --> 00:57:56.173
So what's my word?
00:57:56.233 --> 00:57:57.117
for your season.
00:57:57.117 --> 00:58:01.061
No, I guess for our season, because you've been just as much a part of this.
00:58:02.849 --> 00:58:06.559
Well, my word of the year was boldness.
00:58:06.579 --> 00:58:22.211
Boldness, and the year's not over, so I will touch on that in December, not over, so I will touch on that in December.
00:58:22.231 --> 00:58:33.432
But I would say that that is an area that I have felt the most resistance in, or you could say spiritual warfare in a lot more I have to be, a lot more prayerful.
00:58:33.432 --> 00:58:42.467
I feel is that is the area of my life that I have that's been shaken up the most, um, through just pregnancy and situations.
00:58:42.467 --> 00:59:01.253
But I would say the word that comes to mind for the season that I have just walked so close hand in hand with you in during what you've been going through, is just gratitude.
00:59:01.253 --> 00:59:19.909
Seeing you in a place where there was not to throw us under the bus, but almost a bit of a season of complaining, and how that truly is such a killer.
00:59:19.909 --> 00:59:37.244
It just, it's a bitter thing that I've seen God just like uproot and like pull out, and to see you just walk in this spirit of gratitude has been incredible.
00:59:37.244 --> 00:59:46.739
I also see that my dad has my dog that he's dropping off, so we're going to wrap it up before all the chaos happens.
00:59:46.739 --> 00:59:50.617
But is there anything else you want to say to the audience?
00:59:50.617 --> 00:59:51.280
No.
00:59:52.291 --> 00:59:53.996
You're like dog's walking in.
00:59:53.996 --> 01:00:04.097
No, let the chaos ensue, okay, well, thank you so much for listening to this episode.
01:00:04.097 --> 01:00:08.429
Uh, I'm super pumped for just future episodes to come in the season.
01:00:08.429 --> 01:00:24.704
Uh, I would love to talk more about just uh at home birth and what that looks like and how we came to that conclusion, talking about postpartum and just all things motherhood as we're walking into this season.
01:00:24.704 --> 01:00:32.224
Thank you for joining us on Cup of Joy and we hope that you took something away from this.
01:00:32.224 --> 01:00:38.378
I love my husband and I love just his mind, so it's been fun to kind of pick at his brain.
01:00:38.378 --> 01:00:47.454
But have a wonderful rest of your day, your summer or, if you're listening to this, in the dead of winter.
01:00:50.280 --> 01:00:52.474
I'm sorry I've been holding that in.
01:00:54.731 --> 01:00:56.438
Or if you're listening to this in the dead of winter.
01:00:56.438 --> 01:00:58.838
Just hope you're enjoying the season that you're in.
01:00:58.838 --> 01:01:00.512
We'll talk soon.
01:01:00.512 --> 01:01:01.273
Bye.
01:01:01.614 --> 01:01:02.034
Bye.
01:01:02.916 --> 01:01:03.436
I'm sorry.