Build Your Confidence

Tone: Hello and welcome back to respect the tone. Today we're talking about confidence, not the loud kind, not the kind that walks into a room trying to prove something. I'm talking about the quiet confidence that comes from knowing who you are, trusting who you are and believing you're capable of handling whatever comes your way. To me, confidence isn't something you're born with. It's something you build. think about throughout your life, people will either help you build your confidence or make it harder to find it. But at the end of the day, confidence is our responsibility. And when it comes to respecting the tone, confidence. is about showing up in a way that's consistent with who you want to be, not who everyone else expects you to be. Let's pivot now to our tone setter of the week. This week's tone setter isn't a best selling author or a famous speaker. It's my partner, Bailey. You know, I've had the privilege of watching Bailey for nearly 20 years. And one thing I've always admired about her. she doesn't wait until she feels confident to take action, she just goes. She's a woman of action. She shows up. She trusts herself. She believes she'll figure it out. That mindset changes everything. And it's something that I try hard to embody in myself. Because while most people spend their time wondering if they're ready, Bailey starts moving. what's amazing is that people naturally follow her. Not because she's the loudest person in the room, but because confidence is contagious. It rubs off on people. And watching her has reminded me that confidence isn't about having all the answers. It's believing you're capable of finding them. Some of the strongest people I know never announced their confidence. They demonstrate it. Which now takes us to our respect the bar segment. In today's respect the bar, we're to be talking again about J Cole and the song is the climb back. The song opens with a question that has always stuck with me. Are you doing this work to facilitate growth or to become famous? What is more important, getting or letting go? And then J. Cole comes in with these words, everything comes back full circle. When I hear that song, I don't think about the comeback or the climb back. I think about the climb. Everybody loves the comeback story. Nobody celebrates the climb. The climb is uncomfortable. It's lonely. It can be frustrating. It's where your confidence gets tested. But it's also where your character gets built. Confidence isn't created when you reach the top. It's not a destination. It's created why you're climbing throughout the process of getting where you want to go. Now let's talk about the move, the main moment of the week. As a coach, I've noticed something in the clients that I spend time with. The people who struggle most with confidence. usually think confidence comes first. They believe they'll finally take action once they feel ready, ready to speak, ready to apply, ready to launch that business or raise their hand to take on a big project. But it's actually the opposite. Action is what creates confidence. Every presentation, every difficult conversation, every coaching session, even every podcast episode, every promise you keep to yourself becomes another piece of evidence that says I can do hard things. Confidence isn't built by thinking it's built by doing. That's the theme for today. Personally, when I look back on my journey as a speaker, it's kind of funny. I don't ever remember waking up and suddenly feeling confident. Even today, I have a pit in my stomach before I step on to a stage. But what has what change wasn't how I felt. It was what I observed. I stopped evaluating myself. Instead, I started paying attention to the audience. Were people leaning in? Were they asking questions? Were they engaged? Were they taking notes? I realized success wasn't about whether I felt confident. It was about whether I created value for the people in the audience. And when I focused on serving the audience instead of judging myself, my confidence naturally grew because of where I put my attention. So what's this week's coaches corner? I'll be honest with you. There are still moments before I hit record on this podcast where I wonder, is anyone going to listen? do actually have something worth saying. These thoughts haven't disappeared. The difference is they no longer get to make the decision for me. I've learned that confidence isn't the in the absence of doubt, it's choosing to move forward anyway. So here's my question for you. Where are you waiting to feel confident before taking action? Again, where are you waiting? to feel confident before taking action. And what if taking action is exactly what builds your confidence? Now here comes the undertones. Here's the subtle part. A lack of confidence has a tone. You apologize before you speak. You qualify every opinion. You shrink your ideas. You ask for permission when you don't need it. But real confidence has a tone too. It listens. It doesn't need to dominate. It doesn't need to prove itself. It speaks with clarity because it knows its value. And that's really the purpose of this podcast, to help you recognize your value. Own it. And communicate it with intention. So here's my challenge for you this week. It's quite simple. Keep one promise to yourself. Maybe it's raising your hand in a meeting. Maybe it's finally making the phone call you've been avoiding. Maybe it's simply going to the gym. Or maybe it's having that difficult conversation you've been putting off. But pick one thing, just one, and then do it. Because every promise you keep to yourself is another deposit into your confidence bank account. Those deposits compound over time and before you notice it, everyone else will. And just to close us out here, confidence isn't something you discover. It's something you build one decision, one conversation, one promise at a time. So please keep showing up, keep climbing, keep making deposits. That's how you move the mean. Until next time, respect the tone. Tone out.