Stacy: Okay, my bad.
Krystal with a K: My
Stacy: my road trip and my crack.
Krystal with a K: Backpack.
Stacy: God, you're so good at that.
Krystal with a K: I really miss a calling as a fucking rapper. Mm, hit me up. I'm Crystal Meth. Okay. So you were super
Stacy: You sure did. Gov. Wicca Wicca.
Krystal with a K: three time Cancer Survivor because I'm collecting them like Pokemon cards Chaos Navigator and all the things. leave it up to me to fuck up my beginning of my episode. But you know what? It's my podcast and I do what I want. All right? We are officially on episode four zero. Woo hoo hoo hoo Guess what? I survived forty years. And so this is my lucky episode. I'm actually in the process of starting something with my soul sister, somebody that's so incredible, so smart, such a hippie, And she's also my breastie and a breast cancer survivor. I just thought, who better to have than this beautiful, incredible, stunning woman? Her name is Stacy. You've met her before. Say hello to everybody, Stacy.
Stacy: Hey, everybody.
Krystal with a K: obviously we've mentioned it in our picnic episode. If you've not watched that, we went and did picnics with strangers and asked them what their plot twists were because everybody has one and it doesn't have to be compared to cancer. listen, I know what you're thinking. my gosh, she always has people that have breast cancer on her podcast. I have a lot of people and because I've gone through it, people tend to reach out that have also fought the same monster. Stacey and I are both firm believers that your hardest doesn't have to be compared. we all are looking for the after part of that. something that she did that I found super inspirational and has actually pushed me to travel and to go into nature more is going on this epic adventure
Stacy: you
Krystal with a K: after we lost one of our very close friends, a role model to both of us in the breast cancer community. Her name was Jen. We both supported her nonprofit after she passed both by serving on the board and working for the nonprofit. Stace, I don't know if you've ever actually told me what domino effect occurred before you went on this trip and how you even decided to do it. so I'd love to hear about this because we always talk about the hardest part, the cancer or the disease the loss the grief. But
Stacy: you
Krystal with a K: I think it's just as important to give hope to talk about the epic after part. So it's all yours, sis. Tell me tell me a little about
Stacy: wow.
Krystal with a K: your plot twist first and and how you ended up there.
Stacy: when we filmed our first episode together, The Bond, we talked about the cancer part. And we also talked about how after I was done with treatment, I felt like it... took me a while to come to terms with what I had just gone through. Because when I was going through it, I was in that warrior mode, which you hear a lot survivors talk about that. You just go into this I just got to do what I got to do. then when you're done with the doctor's appointments and the treatments and the surgeries you're left going, okay, what now? or, you're just done with me, And they just kind of send you off into the ether and say, good luck. after that happened for me and I was done with my surgeries, I went through a series of things where I had a hard time like actually sitting down and processing what I went through. And for a while, I had a hard time even saying the word, I have cancer Looking back, it was one of those things where I don't know if I just couldn't fathom what I had just survived maybe I was numb to it or maybe I was doing different ways of numbing. But for me, multiple things that were happening and some of them felt just sometimes even worse than going through cancer. I went through some failed relationships. just survived something that was meant to kill me and what am I doing with my life? So there was a lot of those emotions and feelings that I was struggling with.
Krystal with a K: I think that you and most cancer survivors specifically, but other diseases as well, and even traumas, everyone around you wants you to be okay. So they have the expectation you're going back to who you were. everyone kind of pressures you like, you're okay now, you're good, right? you are so far from that and you aren't even the same person in most cases anymore. So it's such a weird non healing conundrum. that you can't put on other people, but you also don't know what the fuck's going on with you and why you feel that way.
Stacy: Yeah, you you start to learn there's a BC before cancer and then there's like an AD after diagnosis. Your life gets split into who you were before and who you are now and who you are now. sometimes you don't even know what that looks like. You don't know who you are. how chemo breaks down your cells, just the whole experience of cancer. breaks down your identity. It breaks down sometimes your spirituality. There's an emotional survival that goes with it too. So there's all these aspects of what you thought life should be. And then cancer comes in and is like, nope, let's just rearrange all of that. And you're kind of left with these pieces of you and you're trying to put it back together and you don't know what goes where, what belongs anymore and what doesn't. for a little while I went through that, I've, finished my treatments in 2016 and it took me almost six years, so maybe five and a half years later of doing this, where I got to a point where It felt like it burns it all down to the ground. I had kept trying to go through life. still trying to either, A, act like cancer didn't change me, sometimes it felt like I was just going through the motions and I realized that I was carrying more than just the cancer. I was carrying childhood trauma. I was carrying life expectations and family responsibility because I'm the eldest child
Krystal with a K: I had talked to you about Wesley and if you haven't watched her episode, it's great too. She had lymphoma, but she has something called survivors edit, and she actually talks about that. It's so weird how when you go through cancer, it almost forces you to recognize all the other hardships and all the other traumas and all the other times you've survived, even though it wasn't something that tried to kill you. And I I believe she just started her own podcast on that too. But it's so crazy because we don't really know her, but we know that she's a cancer survivor and it gives me chills talking about it because you just said that and I feel the same way. it's almost like your body can only handle so much and now you're forced to look at everything you've ever gone through and reevaluate life as a whole.
Stacy: Yeah, and there's that part, that hippie part of me too, right? Where some people will call it the hippie or the woo woo, but I've learned so much about our emotional health and our mental health and how much it affects our physical health, you know? And if you have never read the book, The Body Keeps, is it The Body Keeps Count or The Body Keeps Score? Right.
Krystal with a K: Body keep score.
Stacy: your what you go through when you hold on to it and we're taught to hold on to that emotion and stuff it down and just keep going and just keep going. You do so much of that at some point the bill comes due. And sometimes it comes out whether it's through cancer or another disease or other kinds of illnesses. It does you carry that in your body we are magnificent creatures, if you want me to get into the whole nature and the woo woo thing, but I started to digest all of that. I digested not just the cancer, I digested the things I went through as a young kid the grief and the loss that I experienced at a young age when I lost my grandmother, who I was so incredibly close to. And then leading up to this too, I saw that after I beat cancer, I was still having issues. I was having problems in relationships. I was looking for love in all the wrong places and it was affecting me. And I started seeing patterns and I'm like, why? why am I going through this? And realizing that it was me, right? I needed to break it all down and get down to the root of it. And part of that was I was in this career that I was very grateful for. It had provided so much to me, but after going through what I went through and going back into that job, I was sitting behind a desk and I'm just like, why am I here? This ain't it. Why did I
Krystal with a K: This ain't it. Yeah.
Stacy: just go through all of that to go back into this? at first it was that anxiety. It overcame me. I was constantly Googling why does my back hurt? What does that sneeze mean? And
Krystal with a K: The paranoia is so real.
Stacy: it was heavy. And it consumed me to where sometimes I felt like I couldn't do my job. So when I went to see my doctor, the first thing that she said was I can put you on antidepressants. I'm like, so medicine, that's just a band-aid. Let's get down to the root of it, So then that's whenever I learned about going to therapy. So I started therapy very shortly after that. And it just opened up a world of things that I didn't realize. being a seeker of life that I am, it wasn't just therapy. It wasn't me just going and sitting on somebody's couch and talking about my feelings and stuff like that. It made me want to expand my mind and my heart. into learning more about myself, about my emotions, about the things that I've been carrying and why I held on to them and why I felt like I could never release them. And so I did that. I started all kinds of therapy. Well, I say that, I mean, it was mostly talk therapy, but I went through a series of therapists because I would see one and, there's that part of me that's the type A that kind of knew what to say to them get them to be like, okay, yeah, you're good. You know, go do your thing. And I would, I would play that game.
Krystal with a K: But then you're like, Fuck, I still don't feel better.
Stacy: Right? Yeah. I was like, shit's still happening. Yeah. So I,
Krystal with a K: I out therapized the therapist. Now what? I still feel like shit.
Stacy: I, yeah, then I kept elevating. I kept elevating to the next therapist, to the next therapist. And There got to be a point in 2021, where I went through another failed relationship. at that point, I felt like it was the universe just literally going, pal, like wake, wake the fuck up. and I remember it distinctly. I won't go into like the, that's for a whole nother episode. Yeah.
Krystal with a K: That's a whole nother podcast, baby. We'll get there.
Stacy: But I remember thinking, okay, like something's got to give and it's me. And so I started this whole thought process of what do I want? What am I looking for out of life? what brings me joy? What doesn't bring me joy? Why am I wasting my time and energy on the things that don't? And so for me, I didn't have much in terms of responsibilities that were kind of holding me down, it was, you know what, this house that I've been holding onto represents something that no longer represents me and it's time to let it go. So I started the process of selling my house. My career, it was, I don't know what I wanna do after this. This is all I've ever known to do, but I've gotta do something else. So I started laying out these plans to sell my house, pay off my debt, quit my job, take a year off at least, that was my goal. I didn't know how long and I was like, I have to take the leap of investing in myself. I didn't know what it looked like, but at the end of 2021 is when I quit my, I mean, I gave my job like a three month notice. And thankfully I had a very supportive mentor he had an open door policy and is like, look, if you don't wanna be here, you don't have to be here. I want you to go do something that makes you happy. So we would have those conversations and it came down to is like, I don't know what's gonna make me happy, but I don't think I'm gonna find it while I'm still holding on here. was,
Krystal with a K: it's so scary to make those decisions but I do I will say the scariest thing that I've ever done is fight cancer. And so your idea of fear changes and your threshold for it changes. So you're like, if I can fucking do that, this is scary, but you take the leap anyway.
Stacy: Yeah, when you don't know what's on the other side, that's what the fear is. But
Krystal with a K: The unknown, for sure.
Stacy: the fear is what can hold you back from something amazing too. And so I had just gotten to that point. It was like, okay, well, I have fear sitting in this chair. Why don't I just go ahead and have fear doing something else? So that was kind of the lay of it. And when I... was quitting and was thinking about What am I going to do with my life? The biggest thing that I had said was I think I want to travel. I've never been a fan of road trips. I've never I've always been like, just fly me there. Yeah.
Krystal with a K: Really? Are you serious?
Stacy: For real.
Krystal with a K: wow, I've always loved road trips. I did not know that about you.
Stacy: Mm-hmm. I was type A. I was constantly like, me the next, you know, the next, the next. And in my mind, driving to somewhere where I could fly in a fraction of the time and maximize my time, I was gonna fly all day, it's just a no-brainer for me. There was something that I had always wanted to see I had always said, I want to see the Redwoods. And... you know, as an adult loved camping. And I had started learning about overlanding, which is where you basically camp with no electricity or water. provide everything that you need. So I had started, you know, getting into that
Krystal with a K: Like
Stacy: and getting excited about
Krystal with a K: the hardcore hardcore raw dog shit. Like this is this is I I'm a still a little bougie.
Stacy: Kinda, yeah, I mean you're like, you know, you're peeing in the woods. You know, you're like, showering
Krystal with a K: Okay, that part. Digging a hole.
Stacy: with a water bottle. Yeah, you're digging a hole, you're,
Krystal with a K: For the poo poo.
Stacy: you know, yeah, for the poo poo. Yeah. So I'd gotten into that and then I got like, I was just so fixated on seeing the Redwoods before I couldn't anymore because. every year you're hearing about these wildfires that are taking some of our beauty away. And I was like, yeah, I think I want to go see the Redwoods and okay, maybe I'll drive to them. And so that's how it kind of started. I was like, I'm going to have this time. I'm going to do something cool like that and document it and thinking that it was just going to be me going to see the Redwoods. That's all I've thought.
Krystal with a K: I remember you sitting me down and telling me like I'm taking this trip. I think you had mentioned it, like your conversation with Jen, but
Stacy: Thanks.
Krystal with a K: I feel like you really didn't tell anyone until you were right about to leave.
Stacy: Yeah, once I kind of got the green light from my coach, it was, okay, well now I gotta get stuff ready. I need this, I need that, I had to prep things, give myself, things for the road and. clothes, I didn't know what kind of climates I was going to be in. So there was all this that I was trying to now hurry and put together. it ended up working out and the timing of it again, thanks to Gus, I was leaving on Jen's birthday, which was very for me. That's all.
Krystal with a K: Tell the gus. What's the gus?
Stacy: Gus. Gus is what I kind of go with is God, universe and spirit. I'm not really a big religious person. I'm a spiritual person and I believe that God and universe and spirit and we are all of that. And it all plays into the big picture of our life. so I refer to Gus a lot for me, it's all encompassing everything. When it comes to religion and... science and nature. For me, it's all of it. It's all this big beautiful Gus. And so Gus laid it all out for me to where I was able to leave on Jen's birthday. Yeah.
Krystal with a K: And that was that first year, right? Like she passed in January
Stacy: Mm-hmm.
Krystal with a K: and then you left in June. Yeah.
Stacy: June. Yeah, beginning of June. and so had the car packed. It was me and my little seven pound Duke, which I, I had three dogs for safety,
Krystal with a K: For safety, obviously.
Stacy: right? He well, he, he was more of an alarm dog. Because he wasn't a killer by any means. he was like my little tweet, I call him my little tweet. He had like frosted highlights and if he was a human, I would imagine him being like the little gay boy in his little Speedo like prancing around with his pure snipples yeah. So he was more
Krystal with a K: For sure. A hundred percent. I get that vibe.
Stacy: of an alarm dog because he would bark if he saw something, right? He wasn't like an annoying barker but if he saw something that was kind of sus, he'd be like, what's up motherfucker, That's how he was. So he was going to be my alarm dog. but also he was going to keep me from going crazy, just being by myself because that part I was kind of scared of. And so it felt better to just have him with me. and so yeah,
Krystal with a K: Well, that's a companion for sure.
Stacy: having him was a security blanket for me. I also had a pew pew just in case I needed it. But at the same time, I wasn't scared. my dad has always taught me to keep my head on the swivel, watch your six, like all those things, So I've always just been aware of my surroundings, but I knew when to kind of trust my gut on situations. The hard part was that I was starting this road trip and I didn't have a path planned out. I didn't have where I was gonna stay. I didn't have any of it. I was just kind of winging it. I knew that that first day I was gonna make it till El Paso to my cousin's house and spend the night there. And then from there I would figure it out. I had a...
Krystal with a K: So this shit was truly like a blind I'm going on a road trip, even though I hate road trips. I'm going out into nature for the first time by myself and I have no fucking idea where I'm going. So you can't even tell people, I'm gonna be here here this day, here that day. You're not gonna have cell phone service in some of these places. Like you went.
Stacy: I went and I had my wife who at the time was, we were just dating. She had my location, my family had my location. I would check in with her and I let them know, look, I'm not checking in with everybody. I'm not doing this where y'all have access to me. If you wanna know where I'm at. I'll be checking in with her. If you're worried about me, I will be checking in with her. She'll know where I'm at, where I'm staying when I know. All I knew is I was gonna get to the Redwoods. That was my goal, head towards the Redwoods, originally in my mind, I was thinking the Redwood National Forest, which is on the very top end of California on the coastline. Little did I know that there are actually redwoods in other parts of California. So that was exciting. Applaud to us. I didn't have to go all the way, but
Krystal with a K: Plot twist. What?
Stacy: I did. Yeah, I know. And I didn't know how long I was gonna be on the road. I didn't tell them when I was coming back. I was just like, I'm going, I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do and I'll be back when I'm back. So I did that.
Krystal with a K: So you make it to El Paso the first night.
Stacy: I made it, dude, I barely made it to El Paso. You wanna know like, okay.
Krystal with a K: What?
Stacy: So from San Antonio, yeah.
Krystal with a K: And so just real quick, you said Gus did all this, right? And then you leave
Stacy: Mm-hmm
Krystal with a K: and you barely make it to El Paso. I for f you're gonna have to tell me more. But also, how the fuck do you not go, I'm turning back around, fuck this shit immediately.
Stacy: you want to know what Gus did, this is good. let's just say the first 48 hours. So that first day, I leave San Antonio in the morning and I make my way on I-10 towards El Paso. Well, my vehicle is a 4Runner, Which normally gets... I don't know, anywhere between 15 to 18 miles per gallon. So I knew I was gonna be spending some gas on this trip. But when you add in a rooftop tent on top, a truck full of gear and clothes and things it definitely, that I'm not sure, yeah.
Krystal with a K: For an indefinite amount of time that you're not sure it could be a month, it could be six years. Who fucking knows?
Stacy: So you throw all that on there. Well, there's a stretch on I-10. where there are no gas stations. And they have signs that tell you this, right? Well, I calculated it and I was like, yeah, I think I can make it. I think I can make it to the next one. And this is, remind you, it's June, it's hot. I'm on the way and I start to see my needle go faster than It normally would. And I was like, what is going on? it, didn't you get that where it gives you the light, the gas light comes on and it says, okay, you've got 30 miles to empty. And I'm looking at the sign that says 25 miles to the next gas station. And I'm like, this is, this is good. We're cutting it close. Well, the counter on the gas meter, and I'm keeping track of the miles to the gas station, and that little window is getting smaller and smaller to where I finally am like, I'm not gonna make it. Like, I'm not gonna make it. I'm not gonna make it to the gas station, and I'm already calling my girlfriend, and I'm like, I don't know what's gonna happen. Can you please have USAA on standby? Like, I'm gonna need roadside assistance. and it's hot, right? And so then I'm thinking, well, if I'm gonna run out of gas, I need to run out under an underpass, so at least I'm in the shade, because ITIN is like, it's hot, it's nothing but big rigs, people going fast, you're flying on this highway, I'm turning off the AC, everything I thought my dad taught me, roll down the windows, turn off the AC, like turn everything off and preserve whatever you have. And I'm doing that. Sweating.
Krystal with a K: Sweating, just fucking in a hot box, sweating.
Stacy: And I'm already...
Krystal with a K: It's basically like Iraq out there, to be honest. I've made that drive to Odessa so many times. It's so bad.
Stacy: Probably. And I'm like sitting there telling myself like, you can't even make it four hours outside of San Antonio. Like, what are you doing? Like, what are you doing? And so, yeah.
Krystal with a K: I'm such a failure, it's never gonna work.
Stacy: So there I am. I mean, I don't know how long I rode. Just so you know, when you get to zero, that's really not zero. because I think I rode that zero for probably a good couple of miles. But I finally got to the exit.
Krystal with a K: I just to make you feel just to make you feel better, my husband will attest to this. one of my toxic traits, I have a few, is riding on E. Every time he gets in my car, he's Of course you don't have fucking gas. Of course your gas lights on. I'm like, no, will you fill it up for me? But I kinda like the rush I get whenever I'm out of gas.
Stacy: Yeah. Yeah, okay. Well, I dare you to try it on I10.
Krystal with a K: But you I don't think you roll that way usually.
Stacy: No, not that, not like that. But I finally get to the exit and it's an uphill exit. Like you're not just, it was an uphill and I'm just like, please, please. And I pull up to the gas station and this gas station looks like it has been abandoned for years but yes yeah
Krystal with a K: It it's like Texas chainsaw massacre and they're serving human barbecue. Yeah, for sure.
Stacy: and they're charging you a ridiculous amount for a gas because they know that they can and so I sputter into the bay and I made it hallelujah I made it lesson learned right lesson learned so I got the gas god I was praying to everything
Krystal with a K: Were you praying to Gus the whole time, like, I'll give you my firstborn child or like whatever?
Stacy: everything And so I fill up, continue on and I make it to La Paso. Great. Get to see my cousin, go to bed, exhausted already. And the next morning I get a call from my girlfriend that my other dog, Pocket, got out of our yard. So she wakes up really early in the morning for work. And so she was wait, well, you know, got up, was letting him out before she had to leave. Well, when she went to go get. look for him to call him inside, he was nowhere to be found, come to find out that the back gate was cracked open and he was gone. And she was freaking out. And I mean, rightfully so, right? Like I can't even imagine. She was freaking out. She has called me. She was like, pocket got out. I don't know where he is, but I was like, okay, he's done this before. Like, and he's just gone down the street. And then I call for him and he comes back. So I'm like, just call for him. Nothing. I like, you have to go to work, right? And I was like, he's gonna come back. He'll come back So she didn't go to work. She ends up looking for him, right? Calling for him all throughout the neighborhood, nowhere. so by that evening, he hadn't made it back and I was like, he's looking for me. usually if I call him, he'll come and he wasn't which to me, I knew he was looking for me. I knew because he is my little soul dog. I got him right before I got diagnosed with cancer and he's one of those he's another Gus thing. He was brought into my life when I needed him the most and he is the most of my animals. He was the most like me. He's a little street dog that loves being outside and will like wander around and he's chill as anything. But he's also stubborn and he's gonna do what he wants He's me. Well, he was looking for me. He's mad that I took Duke and he went looking for me. So when she told me that he hadn't come back, I was like, I have to come home. So I booked a flight. Also that same same day my computer, my laptop crapped out on me. everything that could tell you to turn around was everything was trying to tell me just go home, just just quit, just go home. I turned my laptop into Best Buy and said, y'all figure that out. I flew home to San Antonio with Duke so that we could start looking for pocket. And that we tried, we tried looking. We spent every waking moment of that whole week looking for him. From the moment we woke up, we would jump on bikes, going around different neighborhoods. We put out flyers, we posted banners. We were put all over social media. everywhere we could think of within that whole neighborhood we were looking every day and multiple people family friends they were coming and helping and I mean it was non-stop we were looking for this dude couldn't find him anywhere finally it got to be the end of that week and I told Lydia I was like if I stay here this will consume my life I will not stop until I find him. I know I can't do that. And so I made the hardest decision to fly back and to continue the road trip. if I don't leave now, I'll never leave. So we, me and Duke flew back to El Paso and spent another day there while I was waiting for my laptop to get fixed and less than 24 hours after I'd been back is when she called me somebody had had him the whole time. The whole time they had,
Krystal with a K: What? Aww So he was like taken care of.
Stacy: do you want like this dude? And so the whole time that we were looking for him we're like pink chip pocket. like peeing chip pocket, right? Like we were mad that he left that was doing this. But at the same time, so somebody had found him that morning that he got out, found him at a busy intersection and they grabbed him and they took him and they had been taking care of him and they were saving up money to take him to the vet. And somebody saw the banner
Krystal with a K: My gosh.
Stacy: and they were like, hey, I think that's, that's the dog that you found. So they called and sure enough, it was him. They took him to the family barbecues. They took him to H-E-B. He was living his best life for that whole week while we were out looking for him like crazy.
Krystal with a K: Well, maybe he needed his own journey to find himself a little bit. Maybe.
Stacy: Maybe.
Krystal with a K: You guys did it together, but separate.
Stacy: Maybe. Yeah, right. So she went to go pick him up.
Krystal with a K: my gosh. So but you were back in the game. Like
Stacy: I had already made the decision. I was already back in the game. I was already getting my stuff ready to lap next morning to go head out. And so it all worked out. Looking back hindsight, you know, I felt like those were tests and I'm, thinking maybe Gus was like, let's just see if she's really ready for this.
Krystal with a K: Well, I also think the test is letting go of control in an uncontrollable
Stacy: Mm-hmm.
Krystal with a K: world. Cancer tests you of that, but as time goes by, as you said with with the type A personality, same as me. After a while, when you get further and further away from that, like you get amnesia and you forget, I don't have control over all this little shit. I only have control over minimal things in life. And one of them was the decision to continue or not. You had no control of what happened to Pocket, where he ended up, like that was all out of your control. And you chose to do this one thing, regardless of what. Yeah. Right. And I think th
Stacy: I had to pick me. I chose to pick me, which I had to do.
Krystal with a K: this this is a perfect example of nothing is ever gonna be perfect. The waiting until something's perfect or until life's just right that is going to keep you f stagnant. You're never gonna do it. You're never gonna take the
Stacy: Mm-hmm.
Krystal with a K: trip. You're never gonna book the adventure. if you always stop when shit gets hard or when shit isn't exactly how it's supposed to be. So you're back in the game, your puppy is back, little pocket, pinche pocket. For those of you that are Caucasian,
Stacy: Yeah. Pinch-a-pocket was back home.
Krystal with a K: that means fucking pocket. Like this fucking dog. Yeah. And so you're back
Stacy: Fucking bugger. Yeah. Yeah.
Krystal with a K: in El Paso about to head out.
Stacy: Yeah, so Pocket being home safe and sound, I felt so much better. I mean, I was like, OK, where am I going? Well, I knew that the next day was going to be a full moon, a super moon. And I had already kind of decided that from there I was going to make it to Sedona because I had always heard about Sedona. I'd always heard about the spiritual vortex the magic and the dirt And I was like, what better place to catch a full moon than there? So I left the next morning super early and headed to Sedona and that's where I ended up. That was my first stop.
Krystal with a K: And you got to see a supermoon there.
Stacy: I got to see a super moon there.
Krystal with a K: Would that have been there the week before? Wow. so for anybody that wants to see like these pictures, I'll put a few on this, but you actually have a substack that you are writing all about this trip, this epic trip.
Stacy: Yeah, barely. Barely. Now, four years later, I documented the whole thing. I took pictures, I took videos, I took videos of me talking to myself, talking through things, you know, me talking to Duke. And I've had them. just taking up space in my camera and I finally feel like I need to tell my story. So I started a sub stack of that, of telling the story.
Krystal with a K: And it's called what,
Stacy: It is called Seek Your Epic I'll send you this picture but there is between the Grand Canyon and Page, Arizona there was a place I was driving and it was at sunset and I stopped to take a picture of the sunset on the side of the road and I guess it must have been like a a popular spot because there were stickers on the guardrails all along there. And where I happened to stop and where I took the picture ended up being the sticker and it had Seeker Epic on there. And it just was like, it just happened to be it was Gus, right? Thanks, Gus. I didn't realize it till I left that spot how cool that picture looked. And that picture has become the backdrop for a lot of what I do. on my phone as my screen saver, but it ended up being the perfect analogy to what I was doing. And so I started the sub stack, it's called Seeker Epic. I am only like four episodes in right now. I have only talked about my first two stops, which was Sedona and the Grand Canyon, and I still have a whole lot more to write about. But I think for me now, after I did it, and after I've let my life develop around it and outside of that, I came back from that trip a changed person. kind of how cancer forces you to be a different person. When I actually went through this self-exploration, I came out the other side a totally free person. Like I felt free. I felt the chains on my heart and my soul just melt away throughout this trip. And I came back and I was like, life's... That's beautiful and never gonna be the same again. And that is beautiful. What I went through to get to those moments that I experienced and in the time that it took and it happened when it was supposed to happen and every single moment that had to happen in my life to get me to that, whether it was heartbreaking or hard to go through it was all beautiful. I got to see my life through a totally different lens after taking that trip and after doing that for myself. And it doesn't have to be the trip or the road trip or whatever it is for you. being able to work through your fear or your anxiety is telling you not to do or the outside factors and the outside voices telling you not to do something. When you listen to yourself and your heart and your soul and you do what is true and genuine to you, what comes out on the other side of that, even though you don't know what it is, it's gonna be beautiful no matter what it is.
Krystal with a K: I am glad you told us the first little bit so that we are almost caught up to your substack because I want to highly encourage people to go read. You're an incredible writer. You're an incredible keynote speaker. Stace and I are cut from the same cloth, completely different styles, but very much great at evoking emotion and being vulnerable and sharing stories and Also just looking at our journeys and if someone else can gain something, whether it's perspective or purpose, we both are very much like that. I would like for you to sh we are soul sisters. And again, completely different fucking people. Because honestly,
Stacy: That's why we're Soul Sisters. Yeah. Yeah.
Krystal with a K: we talked about this recently. Had we met in our 20s you worked a couple of places down from where I worked in San Antonio at a little bit different times, but I'm like, we would have fucking never
Stacy: Yeah.
Krystal with a K: We were in such different spaces in life. I don't know that we would have been friends, but that one thing that connected us definitely is not the defining part of our lives anymore and not our relationship. this was impactful and inspiring to me. And going and reading it, not knowing every in and out, I've seen some pictures, has been really cool because I feel like I've gotten to know you more and why you are the way you are, because you did come back different. You left We both went into transitional periods after Jen passed. I went one way, you went another. Both were ways of healing and who we have become because of that catalyst. I I don't know. It's just been really beautiful to watch you grow and very inspiring. Like I love having friends that inspire me. And I'm just so proud of you. And so again, go check her Substack out. But I would love for
Stacy: Okay.
Krystal with a K: you to just give us like two or three of your absolute favorite moments without like spoiling your whole substack. it could be one crazy one too, or one like cringy thing that happened where you were like, fuck, I can't believe that happened. maybe throw in one funny or cringy one too, 'cause you know I love that shit.
Stacy: There was a couple of times where I didn't get I didn't make it in time to dig a hole.
Krystal with a K: So you were a bear shitting in the woods
Stacy: Pikachma drift on that. I was definitely a bear in the woods. I got to see so I ended up doing most of the western United States. I made it to California, Oregon, all the way up, and then to over to Montana. I made it to Glacier National Park, which hands down is
Krystal with a K: That's still on my list.
Stacy: one of the most beautiful places that I have ever been to. and yes, it will definitely be on our list of adventure places to go to. and then down to Cal Colorado. I was so surprised at what this road trip provided for me, not just on the emotional and spiritual level, but realizing that this whole time that I was so scared of wasting my time by road tripping, getting to see places and little towns and meet people that I never would have had the opportunity to do had I just flown to the nearest big city. the near nearest metropolitan. And it's definitely given me a completely different perspective on what you experience down these roads less traveled that I was just like, huh, let's just go see what's down here. the experience of letting go of control, not knowing where I was sleeping that night, not knowing where I was going to eat or if I was just gonna Eat what I brought, there's a whole lot of that, but then just the beauty, the nature, the that there were many times that I will write about where I I literally felt my soul release in the some of the most random places. And yeah, I'm just I'm happy
Krystal with a K: Well, I think it goes along
Stacy: to share it.
Krystal with a K: I love that. Cause you were actually doing the journey and the adventure, but that goes back to the analogy in life. Like life isn't just about the destination and getting there. It's about the journey along the way. And I think that you were actually physically doing that, but you can apply that to day to day life. there's gonna be ups and downs, highs and lows, unknowns, lots of scary things, but embracing all of that As part of life and the beautiful and the sad, that is such a physical representation of that, I guess. And I just think it it reminds you of that when you come back to regular life again. Like you're like, wait a minute, this struggle or this sadness or this grief or these hard things, remember it leads to this really cool thing, but don't be in a rush to get there. Like the growing part
Stacy: Yeah.
Krystal with a K: is the best part.
Stacy: That I I came back with that really, I say this even now. The journey is the destination. sometimes we're in such a rush to get there that we're missing all the beautiful little things that get us there. Because those are the things that make it worth it. And coming back and being able to apply that. to my everyday life. Like I know you talk about how I'm like the chill to your chaos and stuff like that. But I've always been kind of chill like but I've always had the crazy side of me. But I feel like even now it's like I I have just such a different perspective everything's gonna be okay. If it's not okay then it then we're not at the end of it. Like it it at the end everything's okay. And even when you go through hard shit, when you're in it, it sucks. it feels like there is no end in sight. But when you get through it and you have to, you have to go through it. grow through it it it gives you a sense of, I I can do that. I can do hard things. And then the next hard thing comes and it's like, Okay, this is a part of that journey and this is what makes it beautiful. you give yourself the the grace and the patience to allow yourself to to feel it, to process it, to deal with it, and then you you keep trucking. And that's I
Krystal with a K: Well
Stacy: I mean that that's so beautiful to me.
Krystal with a K: It is beautiful. And I think that some people, again, regardless of life things, right? Like when you lose somebody you love, that's an example. Nothing's ever gonna fix that. There's gonna be that hole there, right? But there is still an after. People that are diagnosed with stage four breast cancer or certain stage four cancers, they're always going to have that. But there is still an after diagnosis, like you said, and you still you may not have control of all of those things that your loved one is gone or that you're diagnosed with the incurable disease. But you do get a say on what you get to do with the remainder of your life. And there may be limitations, but you are allotted that and you're allowed to have that. And it doesn't mean that you have to like give all that up because this tragic thing happened. And this is something that has now become our slogan, but your darkest moments don't define you. What happens after it does. And so let's make it epic. And I'm yeah.
Stacy: Let's make it epic. Let's do it.
Krystal with a K: And so I think this is the part, right? we've talked about it and it's all over social media now, but we are starting a business where we use our experiences cancer is one, but we talk about grief, divorce, loss of a loved one, all of these different things that can be very traumatic and life-altering. And we want to help people find their epic after. So we're actually having a retreat in October, and that is for women who have endured all cancer, not just breast cancer. And it will be in the Texas Hill Country. We're super excited about it. This one is called Finding Her Again. as breast cancer warriors, but even talking to other women that have had cancer, including Wesley. Shout out to Wesley, thank you, for helping kind of inspire the route we went we all lose ourselves. like you said, there is a BC. before cancer and an A D after diagnosis. And we get to a place when you're out of the shit where you're like, who the fuck am I now? Because I'm not the same person. And just helping them figure out who they are again, how to feel confident, how to feel sexy, how to embrace what they've experienced, but also move forward into who they really want to be past this because they get to decide that. as this continues, travel has been huge for both you and I. healing, it truly is my happy place. I have to have a trip every few months. I told you, I had never been on a trip by myself at all. And I've traveled a lot of places, but I've always either met people there or been surrounded by people. That trip to the Dominican Republican Republic, Dominican Republic, was wholeheartedly inspired by you going somewhere by yourself.
Stacy: Republican.
Krystal with a K: I did it in a way more bougie way because I was not ready to dive into going not on a resort and all of that. But for me, that was a big step. And that's where we
Stacy: ja
Krystal with a K: go back to it doesn't have to be a two month long road trip into nature. It could be as simple as I've never went on a girls' trip. I've never gone on a trip by myself. I've never seen a national park. Whatever your epic looks like, we want to help you find it. And we wanna help push you past the fear. I think that people get the idea that like, you're fearless. Like I've heard people tell me that. You're not afraid of anything. I and you're the same way. Everyone's like, you just live. You don't care. That's bullshit. I am afraid all of the time. All of the time. I hate how afraid I am of things. But I do it anyway. I don't let fear be the reason why I do or don't do something. In fact, if I'm scared of it, I usually pushes me to do it anyway, and even more. Cause I'm like, fuck this. Again, same with cancer. You're not going to dictate my life. So it's not about not being you don't tell me this is my life, bitch.
Stacy: Tell me what to do. Don't tell me.
Krystal with a K: Get out of here, fear. So it's being afraid is the human part of you. It's doing it anyway. Do it with the fear because that is how you push. That is how you grow. So anyway, I'm really excited for this new fucking epic chapter that we're gonna experience. It's gonna
Stacy: so am I? Yep.
Krystal with a K: be epic, if you will. But also, as you've seen, we're both chitty chatty Kathes. If you are looking for a keynote speaker, we're also gonna be venturing into that. I would love for you to check out Stacy's substack, Seek Your Epic, and you're on what, your fourth or fifth?
Stacy: I am on my f I'm about to hopefully release my fifth episode here in the next couple of days.
Krystal with a K: So check that out on Substack. follow us on Happily Epic After. WW dot happily epicafter.com. Check out our website. Again, you can find retreats, speakers, adventures is a soon to be thing. But if you want to put in your information, we're actually trying to see what people want to do. So fill out a little blurb about yourself and we will reach out. Yes.
Stacy: Yeah. And find us on our socials. our socials are under Find Your Epic After. both Insta, Facebook, and our TikTok should be going live pretty soon.
Krystal with a K: Tic tac, we don't stop. We actually have a TikTok. Ooh, ooh, pull over that booty too fat. All right, okay. God, we're gonna be working double time with plot twist and but again, it all ties in. I think this has like been such a natural thing. this is taking your plot twist and finding your epic after. we talk about dark shit, but I think, like I said, we don't always focus on the after. Every one of my people that comes on, any one of my guests. They have really inspired me to want to include more and and even with Stacy and I, how she said when she went through cancer, it really made her realize other traumas that she had, other grief, other issues that she had endured in life. And we don't have to compare them to cancer, but we want to get people that have been through the same things in the same room doing something together because we can firsthand say how healing that has been through our breast cancer journey. And in turn, we found ways to heal other parts of us that maybe we didn't even realize were as big or pivotal in our lives. So but yeah. I love you, boo. And I'm so proud of you. And I really love reading about you because you are a beautiful writer. Like it's been very cool to get to know you. Like we talk and I see things and I see your pictures, but actually reading it, reading
Stacy: I love you.
Krystal with a K: How you write is just you put me there. Like I'm picturing it, I'm enthralled. Which I mean it.
Stacy: I appreciate that. Just like you are like a on the fly can I I'm more of a I like to take my I take like what's in here and take my time with it before I like put it out. So that's where the yin and the yang for us comes in. And so it's beautiful.
Krystal with a K: Absolutely. But I'm really proud of you. And obviously, if you love Plot Twist Still Alive, keep fucking listening. Still gonna be me, still gonna drop the F bomb, do all the things, be inappropriate sometimes, talk about my nipples. but
Stacy: Be you boo boo, be you.
Krystal with a K: I think that's another thing that I've learned is that authentically being myself, I've connected with so many more people and been able to help other people and their journey, just being me and just being open. To the world and all of it. So check us out on www.black twist-live. I'll have a blog and Stacy's Substack link will be there. I might share a couple of your little picks. that way
Stacy: Yeah.
Krystal with a K: you can just find it, make it super easy for you, boo bears. And then check us out on Instagram, Facebook, same name. Black twist- there's a theme here. leave us a fucking five-star review. Apple, Spotify, YouTube. If you're listening on Apple, that's cool because you're in the car. But you should really check us out on video because we're fucking gorgeous. Okay. And all of my guests, we
Stacy: We put a lot of effort into it. I mean
Krystal with a K: really you brushed your hair and shit. Like killing it. So
Stacy: I took a shower for this.
Krystal with a K: you did. I'm really proud. I didn't do that. I just threw makeup on. Same makeup as last night. No, I'm just kidding. This time. one more thing. We do have sponsors for this retreat coming up, because cancer is so near and dear to us, we wanna make sure for this very first one it is at no cost to the people that are attending. Moving forward, it will be attendee paid. But we already have what, twenty beautiful women signed up. And it's open till September 1st. So if you have a warrior that may want to go, please have them go and apply. And if you'd like to sponsor, please reach out. Again, it's on our website. There's a sponsorship form on the retreat page. So all right, let's end this shit the right way. We're gonna do a high five. Still alive and do your evil laugh.
Stacy: I love you too.
Krystal with a K: Wa, love you, you epic bitch.