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Speaker 1: Hello, This is collective noun for a high quality program. Press one.
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Speaker 2: You have pressed to.
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Speaker 3: This is collective noun.
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Speaker 4: With Zack and Tom, Welcome to the show tonight. Look, Zach, Unfortunately we're starting things, perhaps in bad circumstances this evening.
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Speaker 5: Last night on the show, we did possibly over promise. Maybe we said that one person in Australia would be receiving from the show a three hundred mili bottle of la.
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Speaker 6: Ice Cola as a price, a life changing.
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Speaker 4: It was the first price that this show has ever given away, and I think we both agreed we went straight to the top.
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Speaker 5: We will never do it again because once you peak with a three hundred millimeter bottle of lace collar, you can't get any bigger price.
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Speaker 6: Now that has hit a bit of a rough patch today.
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Speaker 4: Well, here we sit twenty four hours on since we gave away the la Ice. Now we did, We posted it, it was sent delivered. We don't know about deliver, but it was sent to our and here we sit, Zach with a slight hitch in the plane, a slight hurdle.
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Speaker 6: I believe it can still be done.
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Speaker 4: Yep.
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Speaker 5: The radio session is a little bit upset with us. Yeah, but I still think we can recover. We'll let you know what's going on in a few minutes. But I still believe that we will be changing someone's life by giving them, for the first time ever, letting them taste the sweet sweet nectar of la ice colar.
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Speaker 4: Can I just say, Zach, I remember when I started at in radio. I heard a story once of a promotion where six people were given car keys. One set would open the car, and that person won the car, and unfortunately all six open the car and the radio station had to give away six cars.
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Speaker 5: That's what we're in. Yeah, is possibly worse than that.
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Speaker 4: Well, this is what I'm saying is that the radio session was set back financially a lot of money, a lot of people lost their jobs. Ever, it was a big scandal, and I think this might be even worse.
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Speaker 3: Right across Australia.
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Speaker 2: You're listening to Collective noun with Zach and Tom.
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Speaker 3: This is Tom's Google history.
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Speaker 5: I think you can learn a lot about someone by what they search on the Internet. That's why each week I go through your Google search history pick out my three favorite weird and wonderful searches. You have to explain why you googled what you googled? What have we got tonight, Monday, twelve forty five am.
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Speaker 6: How to cool down my face?
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Speaker 4: I was sunburn. That should explain everything, shouldn't it, right. So I'd gotten sunburned during the day, and you know when you're lying in bed, your sunburn and you've got a.
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Speaker 5: Hot face, Oh, hot face over here.
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Speaker 4: You never had hot face before?
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Speaker 5: I mean I've been sunburnt before.
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Speaker 6: I wouldn't describe the feeling as having a hot face.
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Speaker 4: Okay, I did say hot face like it was a medically diagnosed condition. My face was really warm, and I was basically, you know, trying to find a way to cool it down so I could get to sleep because it was keeping.
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Speaker 5: Nothing was coming to mind, so you had to go to Google. Well, I was just wondering in your brain you can think of any way of cooling down your face. Well, I just wanted to know what the most effective was, and what was it.
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Speaker 4: They Google just said stand in front of a cold shower on your face for a few minutes and that should do the job. Didn't really have the energy to do that, so I just I just stuck with hot hot face, went to sleep anyway, the sun Moon's gone now and I no longer have hot face.
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Speaker 5: Your next Google search Sunday eight, twelve pm Bunnings wear House jelly beans. That what.
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Speaker 6: You get tools from Bunnings ware House.
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Speaker 5: Have you confused Bunning's Warehouse with some willy wonky style chocolate factory. Well, you get golden tickets or something like that.
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Speaker 2: No.
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Speaker 4: I was out at dinner with some friends and a friend of mine, Josh, was telling me about this. I don't know if you remember this. I had nerd about it. Apparently at Bunning's Jewel, the paint company, we're running a promotion last year that if you bought a painting, you'd also get a painting full of jelly beans.
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Speaker 6: Vaguely remember something about that.
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Speaker 4: And he was telling me that he bought the the it was like two leaders of jelly beans and eating them all in a day. And so we were joking about that. And as I was as we were discussing it, I obviously wondered whether or not this jelly bean promotion was still running. Unfortunately, couldn't find anything.
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Speaker 5: Yes, second wrap up, you would be in the first person to go in yep, and they say no, you take the paint as well, you're not actually not interested in that, just the jelly beans for me, thank you? Yeah.
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Speaker 4: Well, I mean I've only really ever used Buddings before for the sausage sizzle, so to me, Buddings is a restaurant. Essentially.
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Speaker 5: The last thing you googled was Saturday one fifty one pm. Aren't they making a third Cheaper by the Dozen movies? He's been waiting.
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Speaker 6: Out the the last ten years.
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Speaker 5: When's it come in? When Steve Martin and those crazy kids going to get up to another kaeper?
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Speaker 4: Well, you know, I like, you know, I'm a big fan of Cheaper by the Dozen. Yeah, great film, really good film.
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Speaker 5: I want to go that far, and I'd say it's a it's a movie Classify film.
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Speaker 4: And you know how, I don't know if you know, they made Cheaper by the Dozen two, not not quite as good, but you're still a worthy addition to the cannon. And then I don't know, I guess I was wondering, you know, when are they going to complete the trilogy? It's so much is left unfinished. And it turns out so there were plans for a Cheaper by the Dozen three, but the studio didn't finance it. Because the script didn't meet their quality standards.
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Speaker 5: That's upsetting because you know now it's not going to go down as one of the big sagas like it should. We think Star Wars, we think a lot of the Rings, we think Cheaper by the dozen, the Big Three.
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Speaker 4: Well, look it is. It is a shame. One article I read said that that if the second film script met the standards, then how bad could the first film script have possibly been?
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Speaker 5: Very good point.
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Speaker 2: This is collective noun with Zack and Tom.
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Speaker 5: Now, if you've existed on Earth for the last twenty four hours, I'm sure you've heard, so we don't need to recap. But last night we did promise to send one lucky Australian a three hundred MILLI bottle of la ice Collar so they could try the world's greatest drink for themselves.
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Speaker 4: The comedians store Cola Zach the room temperature coler. We wanted to give it away. It was a massive giveaway and Emily was the lucky winner. Emily, Oh my gosh, Emily, you've won the la ice coller. Oh my god, Well, oh my god, did we get carried away? I don't think so. I think that was a reasonable mood for such an incredible occasion, such an amazing giveaway.
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Speaker 6: Now, last night was our greatest night ever broadcasting.
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Speaker 5: Unfortunately, today when we wake it's been rough, look really hard. Today.
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Speaker 4: Reality set in pretty quick. And you know what they say is that nothing gold can stay as active. And I have to say that last night I thought I would never be sad again. I did. But unfortunately we've we've hit a hurdle in the la Ice colar plan.
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Speaker 5: We have sent the la Ice off to Newcastle. It's on the way to Emily. The problem is we can't get in contact with Emily. She's off.
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Speaker 4: Can we get a timeline on this? Let's just get you because I imagine that's what they do in any big investigations.
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Speaker 5: So the last we heard of from her was about this time last night. What I imagine has happened is that she's been so inundated with calls from friends and family that she's turned their phone off and possibly deactivated all social media's.
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Speaker 4: Well, there was the you are regularly here about people who might win a lotto and they will just disengage. They'll you know, lock their door, turn all their phones off just to get away from the hype for a few days.
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Speaker 5: I hope that's what's happened. I hope that she's turned it off to get away from it. Yeah, but but.
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Speaker 4: Zack, we have to be realistic and realize there there's another possibility. Well, she might have fled the country if the la I S Collar has arrived already, So you think it might have arruved.
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Speaker 5: Perhaps she's seen an opportunity to get away with the bounty. Yeah, well she's gone. She's trying to get over into international waters.
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Speaker 4: Lace collar mat can make people do crazy things. Yeah, it absolutely can. I'm not saying that we should necessarily put the airports on alert to keep an eye out for Emily.
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Speaker 5: No, she wouldn't go by air. She's smarter than that, especially if she's sitting on LAS collar. That would really get her the brain power to think of a different plan.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, that's true.
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Speaker 6: She'd tunnel, she'd tunnel.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, I think she'd and I think three und of meals of lace collar.
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Speaker 5: Yeah, they'd give her the energy to do that.
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Speaker 4: You know what I reckon. You could get the energy for one hundred and twenty five meals. Then that way she's got one hundred and seventy five mins was left over for when she.
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Speaker 5: Has I'm estimating if we're saying about twenty hours, So if she left, you know, midnight last night, it's probably halfway under the Pacific Ocean. Jeez, pretty close to Hawaii.
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Speaker 4: I was like, this, this is a disaster, this is an enormous We've dropped the ball. I'm sorry, but we have. Really, we've really left ourselves liable on this one. What were we thinking. Our boss said, you guys are not experienced enough to give away a three hundred mili bottle of Las coler and he might maybe he was right.
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Speaker 5: We should say that some three hundred MILLI leaders, three hundred mill sounds like amount of money.
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Speaker 4: That's true.
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Speaker 6: The cost is actually around about sixty cents.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, three leaders of our ass but insane that do you know what it's like. I would rather if Emily had fled the country with three hundred million dollars hurt me less.
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Speaker 5: Emily. If you can hear this, yes, you have to the end of the show to get in contact with us, yep, and the deal will still be on. I understand that if you're underground at the moment, you might not have radio reception yep, come back up, come make up, give us a call.
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Speaker 4: All will be forgiven. All will be forgiven.
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Speaker 5: If we can just want to broadcast you drinking the Lais for the first time, and then what you do with the rest of the bottle is up to you. If you want a tunnel out of the country, will help you do it.
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Speaker 4: Absolutely we will. But it's just you know, in all the movies, Zach, where big deals go down, they regularly will ask for updates to make sure everything's still going well, you know, and I feel like we should do that on this Occaunty.
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Speaker 5: We have a stop watch. We've got ninety minutes to let Emily. You have ninety minutes to contact us, great, okay, that's or else our deal would be over.
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Speaker 4: Okay, And do you have triple zero ready to dial? If Emily doesn't get.
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Speaker 5: It, we want to do triple zero would go above.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, well that's true.
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Speaker 5: The only thing above triple zero is the LAS customer service line, and we might have to call those unsatisfied customers. Well that's the risk. That's the risk.
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Speaker 4: I don't want to have to do that. I don't want to have to do them.
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Speaker 6: You want to make us do that? You have ninety minutes.
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Speaker 5: Either you call our show or we're going to have to put a call into la Ice Customer Service satisfaction line and we'll have to say we're unsatisfied and don't make us do that.
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Speaker 4: Well, monitor that throughout the rest of the show. Hopefully we're here from Emily.
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Speaker 2: Right across Australia. You're listening to Collective noun.
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Speaker 3: With Zach and domb.
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Speaker 5: Now, if you were someone who doesn't like doing chores, yep, your life might be about to change forever. Because the other night, Dom we were talking about you and your domestic skills, and you had an idea of washing clothes in the dishwasher.
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Speaker 4: But I was just curious if you didn't like if you had too many dirty clothes for one load in the washing machine, could you check a few extra ones in to the dishwasher.
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Speaker 5: I thought, why don't we put this to the test. Why don't we if it is possible to wash clothes in the dish in the dishwasher. We have a dish washer in the kitchen here at work, we do so I'm going to need your shirt done.
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Speaker 4: Is this why you texted me at eight o'clock tonight and said, don't wear your best shirt in tonight.
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Speaker 5: Yes, I thought, under the chances that we destroyed your shirt, I would feel too bad if it was one of your new ones. But you wore one of your new ones anyway, so I don't understand I didn't take it.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, well and it cost me fifteen dollars.
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Speaker 5: That's a fifteen dollars one.
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Speaker 4: You're pretty good for fifteen.
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Speaker 5: Off it comes. Dom's currently taking off his shirt. Pass it over here, which is a line we've said, how long, how many? How much have you worn this? Today is a day, all day.
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Speaker 4: It's been an all day since about midday.
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Speaker 5: That's been the Dom's behind the desk without a shirt on. Now I'm making my way out to the kitchen.
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Speaker 4: Yep, So can I ask Zach is this going to be? He's going to be put in the dishwasher on its own or alongside other clothes.
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Speaker 5: Down the hallway. Now it's just going to be, I think, by itself, So no other dishes. I've made my way into the kitchen and I have the dishwasher in front of me. There's a spoon in here. Do you want me to remove the spoon or I.
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Speaker 4: Think I'll put the spoon in there from my coffee.
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Speaker 5: Yeah, there's two spoons. Actually, okay, you know I'm keeping the spoons in.
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Speaker 4: Oh okay, make it really sticky.
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Speaker 5: I've got your shirt. Do you want it on the top rack or bottom rack?
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Speaker 4: I reckon, it's I reckon you'd want it on the top rack.
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Speaker 5: Yeah, I think top rack as well. And should I clump it up or should I spread it out? Oh?
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Speaker 4: Jeez, I think clump it up. I think clump it up because I think spreading it out. No, you don't want to change my line spread it out. I think spread it out.
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Speaker 5: Okay, I'm using a dish washing tablet instead of a liquid Can I ask you playing at home?
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Speaker 4: Have you googled this? Have you looked into whether or not this is going to work?
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Speaker 5: No, it's very very possible. We're going to destroy the dishwasher. But that's why we do these things. Well, let's just add eleven o'clock at night. We'll put it preemptive when no one else is in the station.
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Speaker 4: We'll put a preemptive apology out there to Nikki, the station office manager, for what might be about to closed.
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Speaker 5: Yep, I have an option. We're going to go sixty degrees for thirty minutes. How do you feel about that? Yeah?
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Speaker 4: I mean, look, well, at this stage I'm sitting here topless, where you've got my shirt? Really, I don't ever say in the matter do I.
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Speaker 5: Aren't about to hit play? Sorry, it's not play It start on a dishwasher, isn't it? Yep? I think let me have a listen. Dum, I'm gonna have to take my headphones off.
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Speaker 4: Sure I can hear something we're running? Yeah, you go on start at thirty minute timer. All right, Well, I guess within the next half hour we will find out whether or not you can wash clothes in a dishwasher. You could have told me to bring in a change of clothes. That would have been smarter, because now I'm gonna have to do the rest of the show top.
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Speaker 5: You're going to have to drive home topless. That's what I'm predicting, And that wouldn't be the first time.
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Speaker 3: Frida across Australia.
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Speaker 2: You're listening to collective noun with Zach and Dom.
00:14:52
Speaker 5: This is collective nouns out of context news.
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Speaker 4: Making out of context news. Tonight, Bachelorette's so a few monk going on a date with the cash Cow from Sunrise.
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Speaker 5: No one believes me at first.
00:15:03
Speaker 7: They're like, no, you're not, And I was like, I am, I am that desperate.
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Speaker 5: Also, Chris Hensworth has spent the week in I Care.
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Speaker 2: Every day was an exploration and journey into sort of the unknown and a lot of fun, too much fun at times.
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Speaker 4: And Donald Trump admires his cleaners for cleaning his toilet. What they've done, I mean they were They're going right into that and you never.
00:15:22
Speaker 6: Know, you know, when you go in there, you don't know if you're going to come out.
00:15:25
Speaker 2: This is collective now, and with Zack and Tom in.
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Speaker 7: The radio industry, thousands of people request them on air shout out every week. These shoutouts are carefully considered before just one is granted. This is collected nuns shout out courtroom.
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Speaker 5: That's right, thirteen ten sixty. If you'd like to enter the shout Out courtroom and apply for a shout out on the radio, let's head indom of someone.
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Speaker 4: Let the door open this week?
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Speaker 5: Did they?
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Speaker 4: Oh, we can just Should I shut the door and then reopen it?
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Speaker 5: Uh? No, let's just go what walks you straight in?
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Speaker 4: This week? But I will shut it so we can open in our first application. Hannah from Melbourne, Hannah, what do you want to shout out for? Hi?
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Speaker 8: I just want to shout out to myself pretty much, just for finishing my final lecture?
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Speaker 4: Ever, your final what was it?
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Speaker 1: Lecture?
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Speaker 4: Ever?
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Speaker 3: Yuni?
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Speaker 6: Were you giving or hearing the lecture? I was hearing the lektayngresulations.
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Speaker 5: Hannah?
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Speaker 4: What was what was the subject? Hannah? If we can ask I, it was management, so it was accounting pretty much. Well, I think making it through a whole series of those lectures is an achievement, because I'll be honest, I was nodding off by the end of that answer. That's that's a complex area.
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Speaker 5: As one of the lawyers, I'm trying to take notes, shorthand, I've left my pen outside the quarter, so I'll have to duck out. Can you open the door for me?
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Speaker 2: The door?
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Speaker 4: You duck out?
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Speaker 5: All right?
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Speaker 4: Have you got it?
00:16:51
Speaker 5: I got one back here?
00:16:52
Speaker 4: All right, we'll shout it back in, okay, come back in.
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Speaker 5: Great. So we had Hannah, yep, last lecture? Ever? Who do we have next?
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Speaker 4: Welcome Greg from Wall into the shout out courtroom. Greg, what would you like your shout out for?
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Speaker 3: Shout out to Woo Goong people back.
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Speaker 4: Home, shout out to the Gong. Okay, what any particular reason you wan't that the Gong deserves a shout out tonight, Greg, or just for being its usual great self. Come from all the days down Melbourne for a little bit. Ah, so you're back. Greg's announcement to people in Willing Gong. Greg's back in the Gong.
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Speaker 5: That's is there any particular postcode? To be more specific?
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Speaker 4: Come home people?
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Speaker 5: He has no time for our question. Moving on to Kate from Shepperdon. Welcome to the shout out courtroom. Who would you like to give a shout out to Kate? Or apply for one too?
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Speaker 1: It's for my mum.
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Speaker 6: She's amazing that ten minutes ago sport me cheezels, which is pretty awesome.
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Speaker 5: What flavor?
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Speaker 4: It's normal cheese, not different flavors of cheesel.
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Speaker 5: Yeah.
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Speaker 6: I think for a while you could get cheeseburger ones.
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Speaker 4: Was that twisties or Giman cheesels?
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Speaker 5: I think you could get cheesels. I don't want to start a riot, but I do have a memory of a different flavored cheesel for a short period of time.
00:18:05
Speaker 4: Do you remember that Cape?
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Speaker 5: No, no, are you questioning the authority of the court cape, Well you're out, get her out. We hate to drag people out of the court room, but the security guys are here for a reason, and if you question the law, you're gone.
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Speaker 4: That's that's a very fair point.
00:18:26
Speaker 5: And I can put an a line through Kate's shout out to her amazing mum for buying a cheesel straight away. That's not going to be read out on the radio dump.
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Speaker 4: But as for the other two, exactly, we should enter into our quarters to deliberate.
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Speaker 5: We have Hannah, yeah, who wanted to give a shout out to herself for in during her last lecture ever of university. And we had Greg wanting to give a shout out to the Gong. He's on his way home.
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Speaker 4: I think was Greg just to kind of important point. Was Greg on his way back to the gong? Or was Gregor already back in the Gong.
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Speaker 5: It's hard to know. I think he was. It was a message to the Gong to say, guys, get ready, right, I'm on my way.
00:19:05
Speaker 4: Back to preparation. Yeah, okay, Well, I mean I don't know about you, but to me, this scenems pretty clear cut.
00:19:11
Speaker 5: Yep, I think so was Well, you're feeling what I'm feeling. I'm feeling what you're feeling.
00:19:14
Speaker 4: All right, Well, let's get into the official business.
00:19:17
Speaker 1: This is an officially sanctioned and verified shout out on behalf of collective noun extended on this occasion too.
00:19:25
Speaker 4: They're gong, can you go? The Greg dropped off?
00:19:29
Speaker 5: Let's is that why? It was obvious looking at the.
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Speaker 4: Phone line, so you can see the phone lines and that Greg from the well, you know what, hat has dropped off as well.
00:19:37
Speaker 5: Now then there's no one left because we kicked Kate out. Hey, Kate, do you want to come back here? Are you?
00:19:42
Speaker 4: Are you still there?
00:19:42
Speaker 5: Kate?
00:19:43
Speaker 7: Yeah, I pulled over.
00:19:44
Speaker 8: I'm still here.
00:19:45
Speaker 5: Okay, hang on, I'm gonna have to come back in come back into the.
00:19:48
Speaker 4: Shatter at kor.
00:19:49
Speaker 5: Now this there's no precedent for this, and it's quite embarrassing to my my legal studies, but I'm going to have to go back on my word.
00:19:58
Speaker 4: Well, unfortunately, Hannah and Greg Dawn's trappling have left the shatter at courtra our first one by default.
00:20:04
Speaker 1: This is an officially sanctioned and verified shout out on behalf of collective noun extended on this occasion.
00:20:11
Speaker 5: To Kate's amazing mom.
00:20:13
Speaker 1: The reason for this shout out, as commissioned and a scheduled sitting of the shout out courtroom.
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Speaker 5: Is buying Kate normal flavored cheesels, even though she definitely had the option of the promotional cheeseburger type.
00:20:26
Speaker 1: This concludes all official shout out courtroom business.
00:20:30
Speaker 4: Okay, order in the court. We should just.
00:20:34
Speaker 5: That was a shambles.
00:20:35
Speaker 4: That was that really was a shambles, Kate. I hope the shout out was sweet, even with the initial kicking out of the court. Thank you, Yeah, no, no worries. I'm glad. I mean, I don't know what we're doing. I feel like the court has lost its.
00:20:49
Speaker 5: Tailor, receiving word that there's original pizza, barbecue and cheeseburger flavored cheezels, and I never want the authority of the court questioned again.
00:20:58
Speaker 2: Right across Australia needs a collective noun.
00:21:01
Speaker 4: With Zach and Dom Zach, it is hard to make friends in this cold, cruel world we live in, which is why I was so excited a few weeks ago when I brought to you on the show that I had made four pension of friends at a local cafe.
00:21:13
Speaker 5: You were eating breakfast by yourself. Don Yep, there was four ladies in the seventies who invited you to eat with them, and you guys really hit it off. That's it.
00:21:22
Speaker 4: It was their coffee and cake weekly catch up at this cafe and I was there for a good hour or two just chatting about life, where we chatted about their school days. I think their school formals were brought up in conversation. It was really a riveting time.
00:21:35
Speaker 5: Didn't one of them try to set you up with their granddaughter? Yes, there was talk of the granddaughter and me, how's that going. Well, here's where things were left. We left it all on the table and we said, you know what, we'll talk about this next time. Because the invitation was extended to me, Hey, we have this catchup at this cafe every Wednesday at.
00:21:54
Speaker 4: Around one pm. Do you want to come along next week or any week you're free and join us for the coffee catch up? And I thought, you know what, Zach, I can put this in my calendar for the next ten years, next period of time. I thought, you know what, I've got a friendship group now every Wednesday at one, VM, I have these friends to catch up with.
00:22:15
Speaker 5: Today is Wednesday. Did you go down this afternoon and catch up with the lasses?
00:22:21
Speaker 4: It was the first Wednesday since the initial catchup that I could make it back to the cafe. So I thought, here we go. I'll see what the ladies have been up to, and I'll see if we can make any progress on this granddaughter scenario. So I walked into the cafe. I was a little bit early, but no one was there right, and I was like, well, you know what, maybe they're running a little late. That's okay. I waited for half an hour, I had my coffee, had my breakfast. The ladies didn't show. Now I have had no shows before on dates, well one, I've had one no show on a date, but this cut even more.
00:22:53
Speaker 5: There was four and as grandmother figures, yes, they're meant to be warm and inviting.
00:22:59
Speaker 4: That's it.
00:23:00
Speaker 6: Leave you alone at a cafe is pretty dark.
00:23:03
Speaker 4: Pretty dark, Zach. I was quite heartbroken. I mean, I thought we had something real. So I actually when I went up to pay, I spoke to the person at the counter, the first working in the cafe about this, because I imagine if they came in weekly the people at the cafe probably know them, right, they're probably aware of them. So I said, you know the four elderly women who come in here on Wednesdays for coffee and cake. And the guy's like yeah, And I said, have they already been today? Have I missed them? Because I thought, you know what, maybe I haven't tried out the past few weeks. Maybe today they just decided we'll go a bit earlier. Don doesn't come anyway at the moment, so and I thought, that's excusable. Do you know what he told me? No, he said three weeks ago, which was the last time I was there with them on a Wednesday, they decided to move it to Thursdays. They became a Thursday coffee and Kate.
00:23:48
Speaker 5: Catch up group.
00:23:49
Speaker 4: And I never told you no they'd be so the week after I was there when they said come back any Wednesday, we'll be.
00:23:54
Speaker 5: Here at one pm.
00:23:55
Speaker 4: The very next week they changed the coffee and cake catch up to Thursdays.
00:24:01
Speaker 5: Well, to be fair, you haven't been the last couple of weeks anyway, but you've been leaving them, I know.
00:24:07
Speaker 4: My point is, I'm wondering if they specifically change this to get away.
00:24:10
Speaker 5: From me, I very possible.
00:24:12
Speaker 4: I can't. I have never been ditched by pensioners before. This cuts on a whole new level. I mean, now I'm wondering. Do I go in tomorrow?
00:24:19
Speaker 5: I think you do and confront them and say surprise, I'm sure you didn't think you'd see me here. I know your plan. I'm on to you, and I'll be a bingo. I'll be a bridge. You're never going to be able to escape me. I'll be at lawn bowls.
00:24:33
Speaker 4: I honestly was quite hurt by this act. I mean you can, like you can understand right that sometimes in life, when you're not getting hold with someone and you don't know how to end a friendship, it can be a bit awkward. Yeah, right. But all four of them to decide to go with a date that I didn't know about, I mean, I just I'm hurt. I'm really hurt.
00:24:51
Speaker 6: I think you need to go tomorrow and expressive feelings.
00:24:55
Speaker 4: Confront the pensioners.
00:24:56
Speaker 5: Do you have their number? Could we give them a call? I think they'd be fast asleep, they might be up for tomorrow.
00:25:06
Speaker 4: Well, funnily enough, I don't know if they had mobile phones. We might have to call the retired village there from, and he.
00:25:12
Speaker 5: Put us through to a room six. So three, please Are you a family member? No, disgruntled former friend. They met at a cafe and I really really have a bone to pick with them.
00:25:27
Speaker 3: This is collective now and with Zack and dumb Dom.
00:25:30
Speaker 5: I'm currently in the kitchen. You wondered a few nights ago, Domb in your Google searches, can you wash clothes in the dishwasher? We decided to put that to the test, so we literally got the shirt off your back. Yeah.
00:25:44
Speaker 4: Look, you asked for my shirt with no warning and went to put it in the dishwasher in the kitchen here. Now again, I'm still not sure why it couldn't have been your shirt. We haven't quite gone to the bottom of that. But for the past half hour you've had my shirt on the Was it just the bait sick rinse had a thirty.
00:26:01
Speaker 5: Minute at sixty degrees? We put in a finish powerable quantum Max. Oh great, well, I'm glad I got the quantum Max for my shirt. Dumb you'd be happy to know that that's known for it shine and protect.
00:26:14
Speaker 4: Well, if there's one thing I want my clothes to be and is shiny. So that's here we go.
00:26:19
Speaker 5: It's great news the moment we open the dishwasher.
00:26:22
Speaker 4: So it's done.
00:26:23
Speaker 5: The cycling Dom shirt. Yes, it's been thirty minutes, so you're ready done. Tell us.
00:26:26
Speaker 4: Tell me how it went. Tell me what you can see in there.
00:26:28
Speaker 5: I'm opening the dishwasher. We have some steam coming out. It's quite hot. Oh, very hot. I got some steam in the face.
00:26:36
Speaker 4: The dishwasher still seems to be intact. We haven't broken it completely.
00:26:39
Speaker 5: I'm pulling out the top rack. Your shirt is in there.
00:26:43
Speaker 4: It's good.
00:26:44
Speaker 5: It is quite hot and oh geez, I can't even pick it up. It's very hot and absolutely dripping, sopping wet. Oh oh, I can't TH's that's really quite hot.
00:27:00
Speaker 4: Give it give it a little while there.
00:27:02
Speaker 5: Can you just give it a smell?
00:27:03
Speaker 4: Can you give it a smell? Describe what you can smell.
00:27:06
Speaker 5: On the shirt. It's too I'm gonna have to lean down to it because it's too hot to pick up.
00:27:10
Speaker 4: Oh wow, Well that's it you want.
00:27:13
Speaker 5: I'm giving it a good whiff.
00:27:14
Speaker 4: Yeah, washed at a high temperature, I suppose.
00:27:18
Speaker 5: It sells a little bit like a clean plate. And I know that's what you want.
00:27:24
Speaker 4: Most most washing machines only have cold wash and warm wash options, not many of them have steaming hot wash options.
00:27:31
Speaker 5: I'm just going to give it a bit of a drip. Do you want me to bring it into you? Yeah?
00:27:34
Speaker 4: Bring in the shirt and the dishwasher seems fine. We haven't broken the dishwasher.
00:27:38
Speaker 5: Not from what I can see. I would actually say that the dishwasher seems cleaner than when we begin, so we could have discovered a bit of a I don't know how that works. I'm going to put your shirt in a bowl.
00:27:50
Speaker 4: I also apologize to any members of the office tomorrow who clean their dishes in something that's cleaned one of my shirt.
00:27:55
Speaker 5: If your cereal tastes like bo tomorrow, you can blame on. I'm just coming down to the studio. I'm running down the hallway. I've got your shirt. I've put it in a bowl, trying to, you know, limit some of the drips so we don't get it on the desk.
00:28:09
Speaker 4: Okay, it is very wet. I've just you've just walked in the studio with it that is completely drenched. Oh my gosh, Okay, it smells clean. It does smell clean. I'll give you that.
00:28:21
Speaker 5: Now. The upside is dumb. You might not be able to wear it straight away, yep, but you will be able to eat off it. So if you just want to lay that down on the table and pull out a sandwich, you'll be fine.
00:28:33
Speaker 4: I think that the colors, the colors might have, they're fine. No, I'm pretty sure some of the dark blue has seeped into some of the white on this show.
00:28:41
Speaker 5: Have you washed that shirt before? No? Okay, well you should have told me that. I need to know that coming in. I would have picked a different wash option. I would have done a cold wash.
00:28:52
Speaker 4: I'm just saying that was a crisp white before and now it's certainly got some ting just of baby blue. But apart from that, I mean it smells like clean plate. It looks like it hasn't really shrunk.
00:29:05
Speaker 5: What we have learned, Yeah, in a pinch, the colors might run, might have a few issues, yep, but it will not destroy your dishwasher, and it will only slightly destroy your clothes. To wash your clothes and a dishwasher, So there you go. We did it so you don't have to.
00:29:22
Speaker 4: I'm glad. I'm so happy that we that I took the bullet for the country on that one.
00:29:26
Speaker 5: Well, it's only slightly ruined. It's pretty good.
00:29:31
Speaker 4: It could be worse. It could be worse. And that's what I'm going to tell myself tonight when I have to deal with the twenty dollars shirt that's been ruined.
00:29:37
Speaker 5: Anyway, some apologies for that, but I think it's a good price to pay for knowledge.
00:29:43
Speaker 2: Right across Australia, you're listening to Collected noun with Zach.
00:29:47
Speaker 4: And like it's been a little bit of a tent show so far. To be completely honest.
00:29:51
Speaker 5: We said last night on the show that we would be sending a bottle of la Ice Colar, the world's greatest colar, to one lucky Austraa And the only condition was that you have to have never have had the drink before.
00:30:03
Speaker 4: That's right, it has to be your first sip of lace and you have to let us broadcast that first sip. What a moment it was going to be.
00:30:09
Speaker 5: Emily from Newcastle won the la Ice Coler. We went to send her the cola. Today in Newcastle we sent off the bottle. However since then radio silence.
00:30:21
Speaker 4: Look, it's been worrying. Zac she's dropped out of contact with We've been trying to call and text her all day and heard nothing back. Now we were worried what might Emily have done? I suggested, perhaps she's fled the country with this bottle of lace collar and we'll never hear from her again.
00:30:34
Speaker 5: It's kind of like in NASA, how you have the control room, that's it, and when the astronauts go behind the moon, they go out of contact. Now you don't know if Emily has just gone the equivalent of behind the moon and she's planning to come back, or she halfway to Mars and she's never coming back, and we don't know.
00:30:52
Speaker 4: And there's so much riding on this. It's the biggest giveaway this show's ever had.
00:30:55
Speaker 5: Now, we did give Emily ninety minutes at the start of the show to be contact or else the deal was off.
00:31:01
Speaker 4: That's right.
00:31:01
Speaker 5: I believe we have a call waiting for us.
00:31:04
Speaker 4: Now I'm pick up the phone right now. Who is this?
00:31:11
Speaker 3: Emilym Emily scared us?
00:31:14
Speaker 5: You had us worried. Emily had us worried.
00:31:17
Speaker 6: Can we ask are you still in Newcastle?
00:31:20
Speaker 1: Yes?
00:31:21
Speaker 8: I'm definitely.
00:31:23
Speaker 4: Okay, that's really.
00:31:24
Speaker 5: You haven't fled the country.
00:31:26
Speaker 8: No, definitely.
00:31:27
Speaker 6: We thought you might have got the booty early and done a runner.
00:31:30
Speaker 8: No, I haven't received it yet.
00:31:32
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, Emily, Well I'm sorry it's possible. On the show tonight, we have questions your integrity. I just Zack and I were worried where you got a bit panicky. We got a little bit anxious. But you've got to realize the stakes are very high here, Emily.
00:31:45
Speaker 5: You would have heard that money changes people. If you think money changes people, wait to see what happens when you get your hands on lai s colon, because you won't recognize yourself and it can make you do uncharacteristic things.
00:31:56
Speaker 4: I got to ask, Emily, why the lack of contact throughout the day you have? You just been flooded with calls from family and friends congratulating you on the wind. Why have you not been in touch.
00:32:07
Speaker 8: I've just had a good phone, Yeah.
00:32:11
Speaker 5: From all the all the messages you've got, probably congratulating.
00:32:15
Speaker 8: Yeah, just blowing up. Couldn't handle it. Just had to turn it off for a while and put it back on charge to not do to bed.
00:32:22
Speaker 6: And that's okay, You're fully forgiven.
00:32:23
Speaker 5: Emily there's twenty four hours before you have Lai scholar for the first time.
00:32:27
Speaker 6: How are you feeling about it.
00:32:29
Speaker 8: I'm pretty excited, also pretty nervous. Never tastes so I don't know what to expect, but have very high expectations.
00:32:38
Speaker 3: I'll give you that.
00:32:39
Speaker 5: Get those expectations in double them, and that's still not high enough.
00:32:43
Speaker 4: Well, Emily, look we will let you go. We're sorry for panicking. They're tense times for everyone involved at the moment, but look, we were so excited for you. Get some rest. You're going to need it. Tomorrow's a massive day, Emily.
00:32:57
Speaker 8: Yeah, we'll do.
00:32:59
Speaker 4: We have time on the show tonight.
00:33:01
Speaker 5: Zach.
00:33:02
Speaker 4: I think it was right that we got that worried. I think it is a relief.
00:33:06
Speaker 5: Though.
00:33:06
Speaker 4: We can take the red alert signal off. We're good to go for tomorrow. We're all ready for momentous day of both radio and in fact, i'd say human history as well.
00:33:16
Speaker 5: I'm going to go to sleep right now, yep. Set my alarm for tomorrow night, yep, and be up ready to go rightly and well rested.
00:33:24
Speaker 4: All right, And tomorrow night we broadcast Emily's first ship of Lais Cola, and if that won't get you to tune in. I don't know what we'll We'll see you tomorrow.
00:33:32
Speaker 2: But that's all from Collective Now. Grab podcasts and videos online on Facebook at Collective Noun Comedy
Speaker 1: Hello, This is collective noun for a high quality program. Press one.
00:00:07
Speaker 2: You have pressed to.
00:00:09
Speaker 3: This is collective noun.
00:00:11
Speaker 4: With Zack and Tom, Welcome to the show tonight. Look, Zach, Unfortunately we're starting things, perhaps in bad circumstances this evening.
00:00:20
Speaker 5: Last night on the show, we did possibly over promise. Maybe we said that one person in Australia would be receiving from the show a three hundred mili bottle of la.
00:00:31
Speaker 6: Ice Cola as a price, a life changing.
00:00:34
Speaker 4: It was the first price that this show has ever given away, and I think we both agreed we went straight to the top.
00:00:39
Speaker 5: We will never do it again because once you peak with a three hundred millimeter bottle of lace collar, you can't get any bigger price.
00:00:47
Speaker 6: Now that has hit a bit of a rough patch today.
00:00:50
Speaker 4: Well, here we sit twenty four hours on since we gave away the la Ice. Now we did, We posted it, it was sent delivered. We don't know about deliver, but it was sent to our and here we sit, Zach with a slight hitch in the plane, a slight hurdle.
00:01:04
Speaker 6: I believe it can still be done.
00:01:06
Speaker 4: Yep.
00:01:07
Speaker 5: The radio session is a little bit upset with us. Yeah, but I still think we can recover. We'll let you know what's going on in a few minutes. But I still believe that we will be changing someone's life by giving them, for the first time ever, letting them taste the sweet sweet nectar of la ice colar.
00:01:24
Speaker 4: Can I just say, Zach, I remember when I started at in radio. I heard a story once of a promotion where six people were given car keys. One set would open the car, and that person won the car, and unfortunately all six open the car and the radio station had to give away six cars.
00:01:39
Speaker 5: That's what we're in. Yeah, is possibly worse than that.
00:01:42
Speaker 4: Well, this is what I'm saying is that the radio session was set back financially a lot of money, a lot of people lost their jobs. Ever, it was a big scandal, and I think this might be even worse.
00:01:51
Speaker 3: Right across Australia.
00:01:52
Speaker 2: You're listening to Collective noun with Zach and Tom.
00:01:57
Speaker 3: This is Tom's Google history.
00:02:00
Speaker 5: I think you can learn a lot about someone by what they search on the Internet. That's why each week I go through your Google search history pick out my three favorite weird and wonderful searches. You have to explain why you googled what you googled? What have we got tonight, Monday, twelve forty five am.
00:02:16
Speaker 6: How to cool down my face?
00:02:24
Speaker 4: I was sunburn. That should explain everything, shouldn't it, right. So I'd gotten sunburned during the day, and you know when you're lying in bed, your sunburn and you've got a.
00:02:33
Speaker 5: Hot face, Oh, hot face over here.
00:02:37
Speaker 4: You never had hot face before?
00:02:39
Speaker 5: I mean I've been sunburnt before.
00:02:40
Speaker 6: I wouldn't describe the feeling as having a hot face.
00:02:43
Speaker 4: Okay, I did say hot face like it was a medically diagnosed condition. My face was really warm, and I was basically, you know, trying to find a way to cool it down so I could get to sleep because it was keeping.
00:02:54
Speaker 5: Nothing was coming to mind, so you had to go to Google. Well, I was just wondering in your brain you can think of any way of cooling down your face. Well, I just wanted to know what the most effective was, and what was it.
00:03:02
Speaker 4: They Google just said stand in front of a cold shower on your face for a few minutes and that should do the job. Didn't really have the energy to do that, so I just I just stuck with hot hot face, went to sleep anyway, the sun Moon's gone now and I no longer have hot face.
00:03:17
Speaker 5: Your next Google search Sunday eight, twelve pm Bunnings wear House jelly beans. That what.
00:03:37
Speaker 6: You get tools from Bunnings ware House.
00:03:41
Speaker 5: Have you confused Bunning's Warehouse with some willy wonky style chocolate factory. Well, you get golden tickets or something like that.
00:03:51
Speaker 2: No.
00:03:51
Speaker 4: I was out at dinner with some friends and a friend of mine, Josh, was telling me about this. I don't know if you remember this. I had nerd about it. Apparently at Bunning's Jewel, the paint company, we're running a promotion last year that if you bought a painting, you'd also get a painting full of jelly beans.
00:04:07
Speaker 6: Vaguely remember something about that.
00:04:08
Speaker 4: And he was telling me that he bought the the it was like two leaders of jelly beans and eating them all in a day. And so we were joking about that. And as I was as we were discussing it, I obviously wondered whether or not this jelly bean promotion was still running. Unfortunately, couldn't find anything.
00:04:25
Speaker 5: Yes, second wrap up, you would be in the first person to go in yep, and they say no, you take the paint as well, you're not actually not interested in that, just the jelly beans for me, thank you? Yeah.
00:04:36
Speaker 4: Well, I mean I've only really ever used Buddings before for the sausage sizzle, so to me, Buddings is a restaurant. Essentially.
00:04:42
Speaker 5: The last thing you googled was Saturday one fifty one pm. Aren't they making a third Cheaper by the Dozen movies? He's been waiting.
00:04:58
Speaker 6: Out the the last ten years.
00:05:00
Speaker 5: When's it come in? When Steve Martin and those crazy kids going to get up to another kaeper?
00:05:08
Speaker 4: Well, you know, I like, you know, I'm a big fan of Cheaper by the Dozen. Yeah, great film, really good film.
00:05:14
Speaker 5: I want to go that far, and I'd say it's a it's a movie Classify film.
00:05:19
Speaker 4: And you know how, I don't know if you know, they made Cheaper by the Dozen two, not not quite as good, but you're still a worthy addition to the cannon. And then I don't know, I guess I was wondering, you know, when are they going to complete the trilogy? It's so much is left unfinished. And it turns out so there were plans for a Cheaper by the Dozen three, but the studio didn't finance it. Because the script didn't meet their quality standards.
00:05:43
Speaker 5: That's upsetting because you know now it's not going to go down as one of the big sagas like it should. We think Star Wars, we think a lot of the Rings, we think Cheaper by the dozen, the Big Three.
00:05:57
Speaker 4: Well, look it is. It is a shame. One article I read said that that if the second film script met the standards, then how bad could the first film script have possibly been?
00:06:13
Speaker 5: Very good point.
00:06:15
Speaker 2: This is collective noun with Zack and Tom.
00:06:17
Speaker 5: Now, if you've existed on Earth for the last twenty four hours, I'm sure you've heard, so we don't need to recap. But last night we did promise to send one lucky Australian a three hundred MILLI bottle of la ice Collar so they could try the world's greatest drink for themselves.
00:06:33
Speaker 4: The comedians store Cola Zach the room temperature coler. We wanted to give it away. It was a massive giveaway and Emily was the lucky winner. Emily, Oh my gosh, Emily, you've won the la ice coller. Oh my god, Well, oh my god, did we get carried away? I don't think so. I think that was a reasonable mood for such an incredible occasion, such an amazing giveaway.
00:06:57
Speaker 6: Now, last night was our greatest night ever broadcasting.
00:07:01
Speaker 5: Unfortunately, today when we wake it's been rough, look really hard. Today.
00:07:09
Speaker 4: Reality set in pretty quick. And you know what they say is that nothing gold can stay as active. And I have to say that last night I thought I would never be sad again. I did. But unfortunately we've we've hit a hurdle in the la Ice colar plan.
00:07:22
Speaker 5: We have sent the la Ice off to Newcastle. It's on the way to Emily. The problem is we can't get in contact with Emily. She's off.
00:07:33
Speaker 4: Can we get a timeline on this? Let's just get you because I imagine that's what they do in any big investigations.
00:07:38
Speaker 5: So the last we heard of from her was about this time last night. What I imagine has happened is that she's been so inundated with calls from friends and family that she's turned their phone off and possibly deactivated all social media's.
00:07:56
Speaker 4: Well, there was the you are regularly here about people who might win a lotto and they will just disengage. They'll you know, lock their door, turn all their phones off just to get away from the hype for a few days.
00:08:07
Speaker 5: I hope that's what's happened. I hope that she's turned it off to get away from it. Yeah, but but.
00:08:11
Speaker 4: Zack, we have to be realistic and realize there there's another possibility. Well, she might have fled the country if the la I S Collar has arrived already, So you think it might have arruved.
00:08:23
Speaker 5: Perhaps she's seen an opportunity to get away with the bounty. Yeah, well she's gone. She's trying to get over into international waters.
00:08:31
Speaker 4: Lace collar mat can make people do crazy things. Yeah, it absolutely can. I'm not saying that we should necessarily put the airports on alert to keep an eye out for Emily.
00:08:39
Speaker 5: No, she wouldn't go by air. She's smarter than that, especially if she's sitting on LAS collar. That would really get her the brain power to think of a different plan.
00:08:47
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's true.
00:08:48
Speaker 6: She'd tunnel, she'd tunnel.
00:08:50
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think she'd and I think three und of meals of lace collar.
00:08:53
Speaker 5: Yeah, they'd give her the energy to do that.
00:08:55
Speaker 4: You know what I reckon. You could get the energy for one hundred and twenty five meals. Then that way she's got one hundred and seventy five mins was left over for when she.
00:09:00
Speaker 5: Has I'm estimating if we're saying about twenty hours, So if she left, you know, midnight last night, it's probably halfway under the Pacific Ocean. Jeez, pretty close to Hawaii.
00:09:15
Speaker 4: I was like, this, this is a disaster, this is an enormous We've dropped the ball. I'm sorry, but we have. Really, we've really left ourselves liable on this one. What were we thinking. Our boss said, you guys are not experienced enough to give away a three hundred mili bottle of Las coler and he might maybe he was right.
00:09:33
Speaker 5: We should say that some three hundred MILLI leaders, three hundred mill sounds like amount of money.
00:09:40
Speaker 4: That's true.
00:09:42
Speaker 6: The cost is actually around about sixty cents.
00:09:47
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, three leaders of our ass but insane that do you know what it's like. I would rather if Emily had fled the country with three hundred million dollars hurt me less.
00:09:56
Speaker 5: Emily. If you can hear this, yes, you have to the end of the show to get in contact with us, yep, and the deal will still be on. I understand that if you're underground at the moment, you might not have radio reception yep, come back up, come make up, give us a call.
00:10:13
Speaker 4: All will be forgiven. All will be forgiven.
00:10:15
Speaker 5: If we can just want to broadcast you drinking the Lais for the first time, and then what you do with the rest of the bottle is up to you. If you want a tunnel out of the country, will help you do it.
00:10:25
Speaker 4: Absolutely we will. But it's just you know, in all the movies, Zach, where big deals go down, they regularly will ask for updates to make sure everything's still going well, you know, and I feel like we should do that on this Occaunty.
00:10:35
Speaker 5: We have a stop watch. We've got ninety minutes to let Emily. You have ninety minutes to contact us, great, okay, that's or else our deal would be over.
00:10:43
Speaker 4: Okay, And do you have triple zero ready to dial? If Emily doesn't get.
00:10:47
Speaker 5: It, we want to do triple zero would go above.
00:10:51
Speaker 4: Yeah, well that's true.
00:10:52
Speaker 5: The only thing above triple zero is the LAS customer service line, and we might have to call those unsatisfied customers. Well that's the risk. That's the risk.
00:11:02
Speaker 4: I don't want to have to do that. I don't want to have to do them.
00:11:05
Speaker 6: You want to make us do that? You have ninety minutes.
00:11:07
Speaker 5: Either you call our show or we're going to have to put a call into la Ice Customer Service satisfaction line and we'll have to say we're unsatisfied and don't make us do that.
00:11:16
Speaker 4: Well, monitor that throughout the rest of the show. Hopefully we're here from Emily.
00:11:19
Speaker 2: Right across Australia. You're listening to Collective noun.
00:11:23
Speaker 3: With Zach and domb.
00:11:24
Speaker 5: Now, if you were someone who doesn't like doing chores, yep, your life might be about to change forever. Because the other night, Dom we were talking about you and your domestic skills, and you had an idea of washing clothes in the dishwasher.
00:11:44
Speaker 4: But I was just curious if you didn't like if you had too many dirty clothes for one load in the washing machine, could you check a few extra ones in to the dishwasher.
00:11:55
Speaker 5: I thought, why don't we put this to the test. Why don't we if it is possible to wash clothes in the dish in the dishwasher. We have a dish washer in the kitchen here at work, we do so I'm going to need your shirt done.
00:12:07
Speaker 4: Is this why you texted me at eight o'clock tonight and said, don't wear your best shirt in tonight.
00:12:12
Speaker 5: Yes, I thought, under the chances that we destroyed your shirt, I would feel too bad if it was one of your new ones. But you wore one of your new ones anyway, so I don't understand I didn't take it.
00:12:23
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, well and it cost me fifteen dollars.
00:12:26
Speaker 5: That's a fifteen dollars one.
00:12:27
Speaker 4: You're pretty good for fifteen.
00:12:29
Speaker 5: Off it comes. Dom's currently taking off his shirt. Pass it over here, which is a line we've said, how long, how many? How much have you worn this? Today is a day, all day.
00:12:39
Speaker 4: It's been an all day since about midday.
00:12:41
Speaker 5: That's been the Dom's behind the desk without a shirt on. Now I'm making my way out to the kitchen.
00:12:46
Speaker 4: Yep, So can I ask Zach is this going to be? He's going to be put in the dishwasher on its own or alongside other clothes.
00:12:53
Speaker 5: Down the hallway. Now it's just going to be, I think, by itself, So no other dishes. I've made my way into the kitchen and I have the dishwasher in front of me. There's a spoon in here. Do you want me to remove the spoon or I.
00:13:06
Speaker 4: Think I'll put the spoon in there from my coffee.
00:13:09
Speaker 5: Yeah, there's two spoons. Actually, okay, you know I'm keeping the spoons in.
00:13:13
Speaker 4: Oh okay, make it really sticky.
00:13:14
Speaker 5: I've got your shirt. Do you want it on the top rack or bottom rack?
00:13:17
Speaker 4: I reckon, it's I reckon you'd want it on the top rack.
00:13:20
Speaker 5: Yeah, I think top rack as well. And should I clump it up or should I spread it out? Oh?
00:13:27
Speaker 4: Jeez, I think clump it up. I think clump it up because I think spreading it out. No, you don't want to change my line spread it out. I think spread it out.
00:13:35
Speaker 5: Okay, I'm using a dish washing tablet instead of a liquid Can I ask you playing at home?
00:13:42
Speaker 4: Have you googled this? Have you looked into whether or not this is going to work?
00:13:45
Speaker 5: No, it's very very possible. We're going to destroy the dishwasher. But that's why we do these things. Well, let's just add eleven o'clock at night. We'll put it preemptive when no one else is in the station.
00:13:55
Speaker 4: We'll put a preemptive apology out there to Nikki, the station office manager, for what might be about to closed.
00:14:02
Speaker 5: Yep, I have an option. We're going to go sixty degrees for thirty minutes. How do you feel about that? Yeah?
00:14:09
Speaker 4: I mean, look, well, at this stage I'm sitting here topless, where you've got my shirt? Really, I don't ever say in the matter do I.
00:14:14
Speaker 5: Aren't about to hit play? Sorry, it's not play It start on a dishwasher, isn't it? Yep? I think let me have a listen. Dum, I'm gonna have to take my headphones off.
00:14:23
Speaker 4: Sure I can hear something we're running? Yeah, you go on start at thirty minute timer. All right, Well, I guess within the next half hour we will find out whether or not you can wash clothes in a dishwasher. You could have told me to bring in a change of clothes. That would have been smarter, because now I'm gonna have to do the rest of the show top.
00:14:42
Speaker 5: You're going to have to drive home topless. That's what I'm predicting, And that wouldn't be the first time.
00:14:47
Speaker 3: Frida across Australia.
00:14:49
Speaker 2: You're listening to collective noun with Zach and Dom.
00:14:52
Speaker 5: This is collective nouns out of context news.
00:14:56
Speaker 4: Making out of context news. Tonight, Bachelorette's so a few monk going on a date with the cash Cow from Sunrise.
00:15:02
Speaker 5: No one believes me at first.
00:15:03
Speaker 7: They're like, no, you're not, And I was like, I am, I am that desperate.
00:15:06
Speaker 5: Also, Chris Hensworth has spent the week in I Care.
00:15:09
Speaker 2: Every day was an exploration and journey into sort of the unknown and a lot of fun, too much fun at times.
00:15:15
Speaker 4: And Donald Trump admires his cleaners for cleaning his toilet. What they've done, I mean they were They're going right into that and you never.
00:15:22
Speaker 6: Know, you know, when you go in there, you don't know if you're going to come out.
00:15:25
Speaker 2: This is collective now, and with Zack and Tom in.
00:15:28
Speaker 7: The radio industry, thousands of people request them on air shout out every week. These shoutouts are carefully considered before just one is granted. This is collected nuns shout out courtroom.
00:15:42
Speaker 5: That's right, thirteen ten sixty. If you'd like to enter the shout Out courtroom and apply for a shout out on the radio, let's head indom of someone.
00:15:49
Speaker 4: Let the door open this week?
00:15:50
Speaker 5: Did they?
00:15:51
Speaker 4: Oh, we can just Should I shut the door and then reopen it?
00:15:54
Speaker 5: Uh? No, let's just go what walks you straight in?
00:15:56
Speaker 4: This week? But I will shut it so we can open in our first application. Hannah from Melbourne, Hannah, what do you want to shout out for? Hi?
00:16:04
Speaker 8: I just want to shout out to myself pretty much, just for finishing my final lecture?
00:16:09
Speaker 4: Ever, your final what was it?
00:16:12
Speaker 1: Lecture?
00:16:12
Speaker 4: Ever?
00:16:13
Speaker 3: Yuni?
00:16:14
Speaker 6: Were you giving or hearing the lecture? I was hearing the lektayngresulations.
00:16:19
Speaker 5: Hannah?
00:16:20
Speaker 4: What was what was the subject? Hannah? If we can ask I, it was management, so it was accounting pretty much. Well, I think making it through a whole series of those lectures is an achievement, because I'll be honest, I was nodding off by the end of that answer. That's that's a complex area.
00:16:35
Speaker 5: As one of the lawyers, I'm trying to take notes, shorthand, I've left my pen outside the quarter, so I'll have to duck out. Can you open the door for me?
00:16:46
Speaker 2: The door?
00:16:47
Speaker 4: You duck out?
00:16:50
Speaker 5: All right?
00:16:51
Speaker 4: Have you got it?
00:16:51
Speaker 5: I got one back here?
00:16:52
Speaker 4: All right, we'll shout it back in, okay, come back in.
00:16:55
Speaker 5: Great. So we had Hannah, yep, last lecture? Ever? Who do we have next?
00:17:00
Speaker 4: Welcome Greg from Wall into the shout out courtroom. Greg, what would you like your shout out for?
00:17:06
Speaker 3: Shout out to Woo Goong people back.
00:17:08
Speaker 4: Home, shout out to the Gong. Okay, what any particular reason you wan't that the Gong deserves a shout out tonight, Greg, or just for being its usual great self. Come from all the days down Melbourne for a little bit. Ah, so you're back. Greg's announcement to people in Willing Gong. Greg's back in the Gong.
00:17:24
Speaker 5: That's is there any particular postcode? To be more specific?
00:17:29
Speaker 4: Come home people?
00:17:33
Speaker 5: He has no time for our question. Moving on to Kate from Shepperdon. Welcome to the shout out courtroom. Who would you like to give a shout out to Kate? Or apply for one too?
00:17:42
Speaker 1: It's for my mum.
00:17:43
Speaker 6: She's amazing that ten minutes ago sport me cheezels, which is pretty awesome.
00:17:48
Speaker 5: What flavor?
00:17:51
Speaker 4: It's normal cheese, not different flavors of cheesel.
00:17:53
Speaker 5: Yeah.
00:17:54
Speaker 6: I think for a while you could get cheeseburger ones.
00:17:56
Speaker 4: Was that twisties or Giman cheesels?
00:17:58
Speaker 5: I think you could get cheesels. I don't want to start a riot, but I do have a memory of a different flavored cheesel for a short period of time.
00:18:05
Speaker 4: Do you remember that Cape?
00:18:07
Speaker 5: No, no, are you questioning the authority of the court cape, Well you're out, get her out. We hate to drag people out of the court room, but the security guys are here for a reason, and if you question the law, you're gone.
00:18:25
Speaker 4: That's that's a very fair point.
00:18:26
Speaker 5: And I can put an a line through Kate's shout out to her amazing mum for buying a cheesel straight away. That's not going to be read out on the radio dump.
00:18:35
Speaker 4: But as for the other two, exactly, we should enter into our quarters to deliberate.
00:18:39
Speaker 5: We have Hannah, yeah, who wanted to give a shout out to herself for in during her last lecture ever of university. And we had Greg wanting to give a shout out to the Gong. He's on his way home.
00:18:51
Speaker 4: I think was Greg just to kind of important point. Was Greg on his way back to the gong? Or was Gregor already back in the Gong.
00:18:59
Speaker 5: It's hard to know. I think he was. It was a message to the Gong to say, guys, get ready, right, I'm on my way.
00:19:05
Speaker 4: Back to preparation. Yeah, okay, Well, I mean I don't know about you, but to me, this scenems pretty clear cut.
00:19:11
Speaker 5: Yep, I think so was Well, you're feeling what I'm feeling. I'm feeling what you're feeling.
00:19:14
Speaker 4: All right, Well, let's get into the official business.
00:19:17
Speaker 1: This is an officially sanctioned and verified shout out on behalf of collective noun extended on this occasion too.
00:19:25
Speaker 4: They're gong, can you go? The Greg dropped off?
00:19:29
Speaker 5: Let's is that why? It was obvious looking at the.
00:19:32
Speaker 4: Phone line, so you can see the phone lines and that Greg from the well, you know what, hat has dropped off as well.
00:19:37
Speaker 5: Now then there's no one left because we kicked Kate out. Hey, Kate, do you want to come back here? Are you?
00:19:42
Speaker 4: Are you still there?
00:19:42
Speaker 5: Kate?
00:19:43
Speaker 7: Yeah, I pulled over.
00:19:44
Speaker 8: I'm still here.
00:19:45
Speaker 5: Okay, hang on, I'm gonna have to come back in come back into the.
00:19:48
Speaker 4: Shatter at kor.
00:19:49
Speaker 5: Now this there's no precedent for this, and it's quite embarrassing to my my legal studies, but I'm going to have to go back on my word.
00:19:58
Speaker 4: Well, unfortunately, Hannah and Greg Dawn's trappling have left the shatter at courtra our first one by default.
00:20:04
Speaker 1: This is an officially sanctioned and verified shout out on behalf of collective noun extended on this occasion.
00:20:11
Speaker 5: To Kate's amazing mom.
00:20:13
Speaker 1: The reason for this shout out, as commissioned and a scheduled sitting of the shout out courtroom.
00:20:19
Speaker 5: Is buying Kate normal flavored cheesels, even though she definitely had the option of the promotional cheeseburger type.
00:20:26
Speaker 1: This concludes all official shout out courtroom business.
00:20:30
Speaker 4: Okay, order in the court. We should just.
00:20:34
Speaker 5: That was a shambles.
00:20:35
Speaker 4: That was that really was a shambles, Kate. I hope the shout out was sweet, even with the initial kicking out of the court. Thank you, Yeah, no, no worries. I'm glad. I mean, I don't know what we're doing. I feel like the court has lost its.
00:20:49
Speaker 5: Tailor, receiving word that there's original pizza, barbecue and cheeseburger flavored cheezels, and I never want the authority of the court questioned again.
00:20:58
Speaker 2: Right across Australia needs a collective noun.
00:21:01
Speaker 4: With Zach and Dom Zach, it is hard to make friends in this cold, cruel world we live in, which is why I was so excited a few weeks ago when I brought to you on the show that I had made four pension of friends at a local cafe.
00:21:13
Speaker 5: You were eating breakfast by yourself. Don Yep, there was four ladies in the seventies who invited you to eat with them, and you guys really hit it off. That's it.
00:21:22
Speaker 4: It was their coffee and cake weekly catch up at this cafe and I was there for a good hour or two just chatting about life, where we chatted about their school days. I think their school formals were brought up in conversation. It was really a riveting time.
00:21:35
Speaker 5: Didn't one of them try to set you up with their granddaughter? Yes, there was talk of the granddaughter and me, how's that going. Well, here's where things were left. We left it all on the table and we said, you know what, we'll talk about this next time. Because the invitation was extended to me, Hey, we have this catchup at this cafe every Wednesday at.
00:21:54
Speaker 4: Around one pm. Do you want to come along next week or any week you're free and join us for the coffee catch up? And I thought, you know what, Zach, I can put this in my calendar for the next ten years, next period of time. I thought, you know what, I've got a friendship group now every Wednesday at one, VM, I have these friends to catch up with.
00:22:15
Speaker 5: Today is Wednesday. Did you go down this afternoon and catch up with the lasses?
00:22:21
Speaker 4: It was the first Wednesday since the initial catchup that I could make it back to the cafe. So I thought, here we go. I'll see what the ladies have been up to, and I'll see if we can make any progress on this granddaughter scenario. So I walked into the cafe. I was a little bit early, but no one was there right, and I was like, well, you know what, maybe they're running a little late. That's okay. I waited for half an hour, I had my coffee, had my breakfast. The ladies didn't show. Now I have had no shows before on dates, well one, I've had one no show on a date, but this cut even more.
00:22:53
Speaker 5: There was four and as grandmother figures, yes, they're meant to be warm and inviting.
00:22:59
Speaker 4: That's it.
00:23:00
Speaker 6: Leave you alone at a cafe is pretty dark.
00:23:03
Speaker 4: Pretty dark, Zach. I was quite heartbroken. I mean, I thought we had something real. So I actually when I went up to pay, I spoke to the person at the counter, the first working in the cafe about this, because I imagine if they came in weekly the people at the cafe probably know them, right, they're probably aware of them. So I said, you know the four elderly women who come in here on Wednesdays for coffee and cake. And the guy's like yeah, And I said, have they already been today? Have I missed them? Because I thought, you know what, maybe I haven't tried out the past few weeks. Maybe today they just decided we'll go a bit earlier. Don doesn't come anyway at the moment, so and I thought, that's excusable. Do you know what he told me? No, he said three weeks ago, which was the last time I was there with them on a Wednesday, they decided to move it to Thursdays. They became a Thursday coffee and Kate.
00:23:48
Speaker 5: Catch up group.
00:23:49
Speaker 4: And I never told you no they'd be so the week after I was there when they said come back any Wednesday, we'll be.
00:23:54
Speaker 5: Here at one pm.
00:23:55
Speaker 4: The very next week they changed the coffee and cake catch up to Thursdays.
00:24:01
Speaker 5: Well, to be fair, you haven't been the last couple of weeks anyway, but you've been leaving them, I know.
00:24:07
Speaker 4: My point is, I'm wondering if they specifically change this to get away.
00:24:10
Speaker 5: From me, I very possible.
00:24:12
Speaker 4: I can't. I have never been ditched by pensioners before. This cuts on a whole new level. I mean, now I'm wondering. Do I go in tomorrow?
00:24:19
Speaker 5: I think you do and confront them and say surprise, I'm sure you didn't think you'd see me here. I know your plan. I'm on to you, and I'll be a bingo. I'll be a bridge. You're never going to be able to escape me. I'll be at lawn bowls.
00:24:33
Speaker 4: I honestly was quite hurt by this act. I mean you can, like you can understand right that sometimes in life, when you're not getting hold with someone and you don't know how to end a friendship, it can be a bit awkward. Yeah, right. But all four of them to decide to go with a date that I didn't know about, I mean, I just I'm hurt. I'm really hurt.
00:24:51
Speaker 6: I think you need to go tomorrow and expressive feelings.
00:24:55
Speaker 4: Confront the pensioners.
00:24:56
Speaker 5: Do you have their number? Could we give them a call? I think they'd be fast asleep, they might be up for tomorrow.
00:25:06
Speaker 4: Well, funnily enough, I don't know if they had mobile phones. We might have to call the retired village there from, and he.
00:25:12
Speaker 5: Put us through to a room six. So three, please Are you a family member? No, disgruntled former friend. They met at a cafe and I really really have a bone to pick with them.
00:25:27
Speaker 3: This is collective now and with Zack and dumb Dom.
00:25:30
Speaker 5: I'm currently in the kitchen. You wondered a few nights ago, Domb in your Google searches, can you wash clothes in the dishwasher? We decided to put that to the test, so we literally got the shirt off your back. Yeah.
00:25:44
Speaker 4: Look, you asked for my shirt with no warning and went to put it in the dishwasher in the kitchen here. Now again, I'm still not sure why it couldn't have been your shirt. We haven't quite gone to the bottom of that. But for the past half hour you've had my shirt on the Was it just the bait sick rinse had a thirty.
00:26:01
Speaker 5: Minute at sixty degrees? We put in a finish powerable quantum Max. Oh great, well, I'm glad I got the quantum Max for my shirt. Dumb you'd be happy to know that that's known for it shine and protect.
00:26:14
Speaker 4: Well, if there's one thing I want my clothes to be and is shiny. So that's here we go.
00:26:19
Speaker 5: It's great news the moment we open the dishwasher.
00:26:22
Speaker 4: So it's done.
00:26:23
Speaker 5: The cycling Dom shirt. Yes, it's been thirty minutes, so you're ready done. Tell us.
00:26:26
Speaker 4: Tell me how it went. Tell me what you can see in there.
00:26:28
Speaker 5: I'm opening the dishwasher. We have some steam coming out. It's quite hot. Oh, very hot. I got some steam in the face.
00:26:36
Speaker 4: The dishwasher still seems to be intact. We haven't broken it completely.
00:26:39
Speaker 5: I'm pulling out the top rack. Your shirt is in there.
00:26:43
Speaker 4: It's good.
00:26:44
Speaker 5: It is quite hot and oh geez, I can't even pick it up. It's very hot and absolutely dripping, sopping wet. Oh oh, I can't TH's that's really quite hot.
00:27:00
Speaker 4: Give it give it a little while there.
00:27:02
Speaker 5: Can you just give it a smell?
00:27:03
Speaker 4: Can you give it a smell? Describe what you can smell.
00:27:06
Speaker 5: On the shirt. It's too I'm gonna have to lean down to it because it's too hot to pick up.
00:27:10
Speaker 4: Oh wow, Well that's it you want.
00:27:13
Speaker 5: I'm giving it a good whiff.
00:27:14
Speaker 4: Yeah, washed at a high temperature, I suppose.
00:27:18
Speaker 5: It sells a little bit like a clean plate. And I know that's what you want.
00:27:24
Speaker 4: Most most washing machines only have cold wash and warm wash options, not many of them have steaming hot wash options.
00:27:31
Speaker 5: I'm just going to give it a bit of a drip. Do you want me to bring it into you? Yeah?
00:27:34
Speaker 4: Bring in the shirt and the dishwasher seems fine. We haven't broken the dishwasher.
00:27:38
Speaker 5: Not from what I can see. I would actually say that the dishwasher seems cleaner than when we begin, so we could have discovered a bit of a I don't know how that works. I'm going to put your shirt in a bowl.
00:27:50
Speaker 4: I also apologize to any members of the office tomorrow who clean their dishes in something that's cleaned one of my shirt.
00:27:55
Speaker 5: If your cereal tastes like bo tomorrow, you can blame on. I'm just coming down to the studio. I'm running down the hallway. I've got your shirt. I've put it in a bowl, trying to, you know, limit some of the drips so we don't get it on the desk.
00:28:09
Speaker 4: Okay, it is very wet. I've just you've just walked in the studio with it that is completely drenched. Oh my gosh, Okay, it smells clean. It does smell clean. I'll give you that.
00:28:21
Speaker 5: Now. The upside is dumb. You might not be able to wear it straight away, yep, but you will be able to eat off it. So if you just want to lay that down on the table and pull out a sandwich, you'll be fine.
00:28:33
Speaker 4: I think that the colors, the colors might have, they're fine. No, I'm pretty sure some of the dark blue has seeped into some of the white on this show.
00:28:41
Speaker 5: Have you washed that shirt before? No? Okay, well you should have told me that. I need to know that coming in. I would have picked a different wash option. I would have done a cold wash.
00:28:52
Speaker 4: I'm just saying that was a crisp white before and now it's certainly got some ting just of baby blue. But apart from that, I mean it smells like clean plate. It looks like it hasn't really shrunk.
00:29:05
Speaker 5: What we have learned, Yeah, in a pinch, the colors might run, might have a few issues, yep, but it will not destroy your dishwasher, and it will only slightly destroy your clothes. To wash your clothes and a dishwasher, So there you go. We did it so you don't have to.
00:29:22
Speaker 4: I'm glad. I'm so happy that we that I took the bullet for the country on that one.
00:29:26
Speaker 5: Well, it's only slightly ruined. It's pretty good.
00:29:31
Speaker 4: It could be worse. It could be worse. And that's what I'm going to tell myself tonight when I have to deal with the twenty dollars shirt that's been ruined.
00:29:37
Speaker 5: Anyway, some apologies for that, but I think it's a good price to pay for knowledge.
00:29:43
Speaker 2: Right across Australia, you're listening to Collected noun with Zach.
00:29:47
Speaker 4: And like it's been a little bit of a tent show so far. To be completely honest.
00:29:51
Speaker 5: We said last night on the show that we would be sending a bottle of la Ice Colar, the world's greatest colar, to one lucky Austraa And the only condition was that you have to have never have had the drink before.
00:30:03
Speaker 4: That's right, it has to be your first sip of lace and you have to let us broadcast that first sip. What a moment it was going to be.
00:30:09
Speaker 5: Emily from Newcastle won the la Ice Coler. We went to send her the cola. Today in Newcastle we sent off the bottle. However since then radio silence.
00:30:21
Speaker 4: Look, it's been worrying. Zac she's dropped out of contact with We've been trying to call and text her all day and heard nothing back. Now we were worried what might Emily have done? I suggested, perhaps she's fled the country with this bottle of lace collar and we'll never hear from her again.
00:30:34
Speaker 5: It's kind of like in NASA, how you have the control room, that's it, and when the astronauts go behind the moon, they go out of contact. Now you don't know if Emily has just gone the equivalent of behind the moon and she's planning to come back, or she halfway to Mars and she's never coming back, and we don't know.
00:30:52
Speaker 4: And there's so much riding on this. It's the biggest giveaway this show's ever had.
00:30:55
Speaker 5: Now, we did give Emily ninety minutes at the start of the show to be contact or else the deal was off.
00:31:01
Speaker 4: That's right.
00:31:01
Speaker 5: I believe we have a call waiting for us.
00:31:04
Speaker 4: Now I'm pick up the phone right now. Who is this?
00:31:11
Speaker 3: Emilym Emily scared us?
00:31:14
Speaker 5: You had us worried. Emily had us worried.
00:31:17
Speaker 6: Can we ask are you still in Newcastle?
00:31:20
Speaker 1: Yes?
00:31:21
Speaker 8: I'm definitely.
00:31:23
Speaker 4: Okay, that's really.
00:31:24
Speaker 5: You haven't fled the country.
00:31:26
Speaker 8: No, definitely.
00:31:27
Speaker 6: We thought you might have got the booty early and done a runner.
00:31:30
Speaker 8: No, I haven't received it yet.
00:31:32
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, Emily, Well I'm sorry it's possible. On the show tonight, we have questions your integrity. I just Zack and I were worried where you got a bit panicky. We got a little bit anxious. But you've got to realize the stakes are very high here, Emily.
00:31:45
Speaker 5: You would have heard that money changes people. If you think money changes people, wait to see what happens when you get your hands on lai s colon, because you won't recognize yourself and it can make you do uncharacteristic things.
00:31:56
Speaker 4: I got to ask, Emily, why the lack of contact throughout the day you have? You just been flooded with calls from family and friends congratulating you on the wind. Why have you not been in touch.
00:32:07
Speaker 8: I've just had a good phone, Yeah.
00:32:11
Speaker 5: From all the all the messages you've got, probably congratulating.
00:32:15
Speaker 8: Yeah, just blowing up. Couldn't handle it. Just had to turn it off for a while and put it back on charge to not do to bed.
00:32:22
Speaker 6: And that's okay, You're fully forgiven.
00:32:23
Speaker 5: Emily there's twenty four hours before you have Lai scholar for the first time.
00:32:27
Speaker 6: How are you feeling about it.
00:32:29
Speaker 8: I'm pretty excited, also pretty nervous. Never tastes so I don't know what to expect, but have very high expectations.
00:32:38
Speaker 3: I'll give you that.
00:32:39
Speaker 5: Get those expectations in double them, and that's still not high enough.
00:32:43
Speaker 4: Well, Emily, look we will let you go. We're sorry for panicking. They're tense times for everyone involved at the moment, but look, we were so excited for you. Get some rest. You're going to need it. Tomorrow's a massive day, Emily.
00:32:57
Speaker 8: Yeah, we'll do.
00:32:59
Speaker 4: We have time on the show tonight.
00:33:01
Speaker 5: Zach.
00:33:02
Speaker 4: I think it was right that we got that worried. I think it is a relief.
00:33:06
Speaker 5: Though.
00:33:06
Speaker 4: We can take the red alert signal off. We're good to go for tomorrow. We're all ready for momentous day of both radio and in fact, i'd say human history as well.
00:33:16
Speaker 5: I'm going to go to sleep right now, yep. Set my alarm for tomorrow night, yep, and be up ready to go rightly and well rested.
00:33:24
Speaker 4: All right, And tomorrow night we broadcast Emily's first ship of Lais Cola, and if that won't get you to tune in. I don't know what we'll We'll see you tomorrow.
00:33:32
Speaker 2: But that's all from Collective Now. Grab podcasts and videos online on Facebook at Collective Noun Comedy
