Leaving Control and Reclaiming the Body through Holistic Healing | Michelle Nermerich

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Gosh, this week has been wah, it has been so hot while I have been editing this podcast.
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There's so many times that I thought, oh no, I just can't do this.
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We have had really high temperatures here in Europe, and the time that I'm recording this, it is in June, and we have been up to 38 degrees, and we have no air conditioning, like I did when I was living in Singapore for nine years prior to coming back to Belgium.
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So I am trying to find every way possible.
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I am freezing water bottles.
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Oh my gosh, my poor cats.
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One is a rag doll, so she's got that double fur.
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I keep checking her to make sure she's okay.
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I already get up really early in the morning to go walk because I'm following my circadian rhythm.
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So I get up at 4 30, 5 o'clock in the morning, and I just start opening all the windows to try to let whatever cool air there is in the morning.
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And I feel so good about walking in the morning because going outside feels great.
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But it's worth it because this episode with Michelle Nemerich, and heavens, I hope I'm pronouncing that right.
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Michelle joins me from Canada.
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Now I just want to give a little bit of a warning because there are some parts of it where she speaks about some abuse that happened during her marriage, and I don't want that to trigger anybody.
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She beautifully tells her story about how she gathered all her interest and knowledge in what she does now, which is along the lines of Kundalini Reiki doing sound baths with crystal singing bowls, and how she does massage using tuning forks, and so much more.
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I had actually done, I guess, the first part of Kundalini Reiki, or I don't even know, and I never knew that there was so much more to it.
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And she briefly talks about it in this episode, but we are going to be doing a special episode that will come out hopefully next week if I don't have another heat wave and I get it out on time.
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So please bear with me.
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I hope you do enjoy the show.
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I think that this is for people who are really interested in the metaphysical, who are interested in energy work, who are interested in alternative types of healing, who may have been told that they are going to suffer from some kind of illness and be in pain for the rest of their life.
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Maybe what Michelle does will help you somehow to manage it.
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I'm not saying that her way is the way, but it's something for you to consider.
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And also, I think that her story can give hope.
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Enjoy the show.
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Thanks everybody.
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Hi everybody, and welcome back to another episode of Wisdom Without the Guru.
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I'm your host, Regina.
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So before we meet today's guest, let's pause on a few questions that cut across identity, health, and resilience.
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So, what does it mean to grow up with a sense of not quite belonging shaped by ancestry and the labels that others attach to you?
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What happens when a learning difference, like dyslexia, goes unnoticed until adulthood?
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How do we reconcile with sudden changes to the body, whether from accident, surgery, or illness, when they force us to rethink what's possible?
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And in our closest relationships, how do we recognize the moment when patterns of control replace genuine care?
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And what does it take to step away?
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How do we define healing?
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Is it something measurable by prescriptions and medical charts?
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Or can it also be cultivated through breath, movement, sound, and presence?
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My guest today has lived each of these questions.
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Her path began in design and eventually expanded into integrative healing practices that bridge science, self-care, and ritual.
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So, with that, I'd like to give a warm welcome to my guest, Michelle Numeric.
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Hi.
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She's recording on a cool day in Canada in her basement.
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And I am recording on a little bit hotter day here in Belgium with all the windows closed.
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I'm sorry to have you in the basement recording, but that's okay.
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Okay.
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So let's start with your background because you have a very interesting background with different nationalities coming into the scene that have caused some conflict as you were growing up.
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So talk about what your early life was like growing up, you know, what the family dynamics were, these types of safe places, if you had any at all, that were either with people or places or institutions.
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And, you know, in terms of spirituality, did it exist at that time in your family upbringing?
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I was raised in a Catholic family.
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Both my parents made both me and my sister go to church every Saturday or Sunday.
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If we missed, we weren't good Catholics.
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So yes, there is always spirituality ever since I was a child.
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Just being a child and trained-brained like the family, I did accept the Catholic religion.
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I didn't start not going to church up until I was in my late teens.
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And then I started thinking for myself more.
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As for my family, my parents were really good to me.
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I have to admit, they were good parents.
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They helped me throughout life.
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I had dyslexia that went unnoticed ever since childhood, and my mom would make sure I would read, where the school system would not like, they wouldn't take the time of day to figure out what was wrong with me, why I was struggling with reading and writing.
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My mom, every day after school, would practice and practice.
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She is like, even though she was a German immigrant whose English wasn't the greatest, she would make sure that we sit down together every night for at least an hour and go over everything.
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So I wouldn't slip through the cracks and fail everything.
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So she was a very dedicated mother when it comes to that aspect.
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She was so dedicated.
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She just did not want to see her daughter fail in life.
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And if it wasn't for her, I would not probably be able to read and write.
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Yeah, because you said your dyslexia was diagnosed in the last day of grade 12.
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Yes, it was the day before my final exam in grade 12.
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So that's what, 17 years old?
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Something like that?
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I think it's 12 grade 12 is yeah.
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Yeah, I think it's 17 years old.
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Wow.
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Yeah.
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So I'm not sure how you survived all that time.
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Well, your mother.
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My mother.
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And I had a fear of public speaking.
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Yeah.
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So if it wasn't for my mother, I would not be the person I am today when it comes to reading.
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Like I loved picking up a new book and reading, especially when it comes to healing modalities.
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It's my biggest thing now.
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The more information I can get in my brain, the better I feel.
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But you have this quite a unique family history that spans three countries.
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Some of that resulted in your being bullied.
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Yes.
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It's a German background.
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My mom, grandmother, and great-grandmother were all born in the same house, but three different countries.
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My mum was born in Germany.
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My grandma was born in what's now Czech Republic.
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And my great-grandmother was born in the Austrian-Hungarian Empire.
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So it's the same house, but it kept switching borders all the time.
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Yes.
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Yeah.
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So growing up, unfortunately, kids would call me names like Hitler's granddaughter.
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And I was quite mocked in elementary school for my German heritage.
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I was called Nazi.
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You name it when it comes squarehead, Kraut.
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Yeah.
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So growing up was not the funnest experience for me.
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And I believe a lot of that had to do with my fear of public speaking, just because how I was bullied.
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Your accent, you said you also had a bit of a German accent.
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How old were you when just when you went to speech therapy?
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It was part of an the elementary school program.
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I want to say grades three, four.
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They only did a little amount.
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And my parents paid for further speech therapy for me because they realized how it was affecting me.
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So in grade six, I did even more speech therapy to make the bullying stop.
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Yeah.
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And for this bullying, did you ever report it to anybody?
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Did you ever talk to your parents about it?
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I did talk to my parents about it.
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And that's the one part with my parents, they were like, well, there's not much you can do about it.
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Like they didn't know how to handle it.
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Yeah.
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And the school system didn't do much.
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So I just got used to being bullied growing up.
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It almost became like a normal thing for me.
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Did you have any friends, at least, that you could turn to?
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I did have a couple friends, and this is what made the whole Hitler's granddaughter and Nazi thing weird because both my two closest girlfriends were girls of different colors.
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My best friend, she was from Trinidad, and my other best friend was from Ghana.
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Okay.
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You sound like me growing up in the Bahamas.
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I should have.
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I just think they're such wonderful people.
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They're so happy and full of life.
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Yeah, it's that's because it's too hot to get upset about stuff.
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And just the way I see it, I don't judge anybody for the color of their skin because once we peel the skin back, we're all the same underneath.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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But they weren't bullied, just you were.
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No, they weren't bullied.
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I was bullied.
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Gosh, okay.
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They might have been, but they didn't tell me about it at the time.
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Like pretty much I hung out with the outsiders.
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I never was one of the cool kids, you could say.
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I always hung out with the outsiders and the people who accepted me for me.
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Okay.
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And what were some of these types of outsiders?
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I would say more the rebellious type.
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Especially in high school.
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It was more the rebellious types.
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Like we would call them the freaks and geeks.
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Okay.
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Oh gosh.
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Have memories of university in in in uh the United States.
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Okay.
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So you also said that you had sexual assault as well that happened to you.
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Yes.
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That was my cousin.
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When I was around nine, ten years old, he pulled me into it was like a upstairs in his cottage, like a little crawl space area that you could run into.
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Yeah, and he tried pulling my pants down.
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And if I didn't kick him away with my feet, I don't know how far it would have gone, but I was wise enough at nine years old to say this isn't right.
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And I started kicking him away from me.
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It did leave an emotional scar, I have to admit, because I always was afraid every time that side of the family would have get-togethers.
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Like, what is he gonna try?
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And he always was very huggy with me and kissy, and even his own stepdaughter would go on to me, like in the older years, saying, like, how he had a crush on me, and he would make that very clear to her that he had a very big crush on me growing up, and he was four years older than me.
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So he was 13 at the time, knowing he should know better than that.
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And you told your parents about it, and they did something about it.
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I did tell my parents about it, and they didn't want to tarnish the family name, so they just kept saying it was in my head.
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They didn't believe me.
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It got to the point where actually I thought it was in my head too, until my cousin's stepdaughter was like, No, he tried to do the similar stuff to me, his own stepdaughter.
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When did you find that out?
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When you were younger or no, I found that out in my, I'd say, late 20s, early 30s.
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We lost contact for a while, and then we found each other through Facebook and we just started chit-chatting and everything.
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I can't even tell you how it came, but we just started talking about it.
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Then we end up doing a phone call because we're like, okay, this is just too much to talk to over messenger, like typing out.
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So we got on the phone and just started talking to each other, and our stories were so similar.
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It was like, okay, this was not in my head.
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I did not make this up.
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And then especially when she confirmed about how he had this crush on me for who knows how long.
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It just was like, okay, I'm not the insane one here.
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Yeah.
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Because for a while I was questioning my own sanity, like just because my family kept saying no, no, no, my whole life.
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And did you turn around and tell your parents after that that I was not making it up?
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I did at the time my mom was already getting sick.
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Okay.
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So, and that was for her side of the family.
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And my dad, he actually did say he's like, I did always believe you, but my dad always did what my mom asked of him.
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Yeah.
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So yeah, he did end up saying that he was sorry that I had to go through that because then he told me a story about what he had to go through as a child with a man trying something on him.
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Wow.
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Which I didn't know about either.
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It wasn't until maybe about five, six years ago he started discussing what happened to him as a child.
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And somebody in the family with him?
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No, it was a gentleman he was working for.
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Oh, gosh.
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Okay.
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It's so prevalent and nobody talks about it, is the problem.
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No, especially when it comes to men.
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That's why I was so surprised when my dad told me about it.
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And now with his dementia, he's talking even more about stuff that happened to him as a child.
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And that cycle of ancestral trauma, it's showing it to me now because a lot of the stuff he's telling me is similar stuff that I have gone through in my life.
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Okay.
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Well, we'll get into that a bit later.
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But that's that's quite wow, that's a bit shocking to hear that later in life that your dad, that your own father, was molested.
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Yes.
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Okay.
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So let's go back into your career um path because you actually started your career path at the age 10 or 11 when you picked up a Microsoft paintbrush.
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Yes.
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Okay, so talk about that path.
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Well, I've always been very artsy um and creative.
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And I told my parents at 10, 11 years old that I wanted to do design work on a computer.
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This is going back to 1988, where computers back then were quite barbaric still.
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And the only way you could get a mouse to do graphics was getting Microsoft Paintbrush, which is now Microsoft Paint.
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And that back then was like the top-of-the-line graphics program.
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So my parents, they always encouraged my dreams, except for me wanting to be a hairdresser because they said there was really no money on, but they encouraged my artsy side always.
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So yeah, I got my first graphics program in 1988 at the age of 10 years old.
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And that was my Christmas gift.
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And I never looked back.
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To this day, I don't do it full-time anymore just because of an injury that I had, but I still do it for my business.
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I do it for certain friends and family.
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Not with paintbrush, though.
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Not with paintbrush, with Photoshop, Illustrator.
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And I'm still old school.
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I still use page layout program, which is called Quark Express.
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Oh, most people would use InDesign from Adobe.
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I didn't think Quark Express was still around.
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It is.
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Maybe unsupported.
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No, actually, they're still coming up with new versions.
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Wow, okay.
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That's interesting.
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Yes, I'm just a creature of habit.
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Yeah.
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So you went to university for graphic design?
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College in Canada.
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College.
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So, okay.
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So we always have this discrepancy between what is college and what is university, because in the UK it's one thing, in Canada, it's one thing, United States is one thing, and in Europe it's another.
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So college is more like trades, like graphics, artsy stuff, photography, nursing.
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Depending on what level of nursing you do, there's one level that's at college level and one at university.
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So university is more for doctors, lawyers.
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So university is considered higher education than college.
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So you did college and you got a design degree.
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Okay.
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Then you actually developed allergies and had to change.
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Is that correct?
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That was for when I became an aesthetician.
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All right.
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All right.
00:17:48.720 --> 00:17:58.160
The reason I stopped being a graphic designer or graphic artist was because I got in a bad car accident where I had to get two bones and a muscle removed.
00:17:58.880 --> 00:18:02.799
Where are these bones and muscles located that you had removed?
00:18:03.200 --> 00:18:07.039
They removed my first cervical rib, which is underneath the collarbone.
00:18:07.039 --> 00:18:11.039
I was lucky enough to be born with an extra cervical rib.
00:18:11.039 --> 00:18:18.319
And then they removed my scaline muscle that is attached to the first cervical rib and goes up.
00:18:18.319 --> 00:18:24.240
That took me a couple years to recover from and get my full arm range back.
00:18:24.240 --> 00:18:30.880
The doctors pretty much said with the surgery, I had a 25% chance of getting better.
00:18:30.880 --> 00:18:32.079
And I just looked at the surgeon.
00:18:32.079 --> 00:18:34.160
I'm like, I'm 25 years old.
00:18:34.160 --> 00:18:41.440
I'm gonna take my 25% chance of getting better because right now my arm was blue and just hanging limp and not moving.
00:18:41.440 --> 00:18:47.119
And even the surgeon was like, Yeah, you can't get worse.
00:18:47.119 --> 00:18:53.039
So I took the 25% chance of getting better and 75% chance of getting worse.
00:18:53.039 --> 00:19:04.400
And it worked out because now I'm doing stuff that they said even with the surgery I would never be able to do when it comes to acrobatics and athletics.
00:19:04.400 --> 00:19:06.640
And how did you heal that?
00:19:06.640 --> 00:19:10.400
I went to physiotherapy for a year and a half.
00:19:10.400 --> 00:19:12.720
I did a lot of strength training.
00:19:12.720 --> 00:19:17.359
At the time, I was living with my ex-husband.
00:19:17.359 --> 00:19:28.400
So the spirituality thing wasn't into play yet, but I was really deep into aromatherapy and making a lot of my own pain-relieving oils and creams.
00:19:28.400 --> 00:19:31.759
I've never done well with medication.
00:19:31.759 --> 00:19:43.759
They wanted to put me on Percocets and OxyContins, and I don't know actually how people can get addicted to that stuff because I just felt gross, you could say, on it.
00:19:44.640 --> 00:19:46.480
What is Percocet and oxytoxin?
00:19:46.480 --> 00:19:47.200
What is that?
00:19:47.519 --> 00:19:55.599
Percocet is a type of morphine, and OxyContin is what you hear so many people in Canada getting highly addicted to.
00:19:55.599 --> 00:20:07.279
I don't know in what family it's in, but morphine would make me vomit, and OxyContins would make me sweat, and just I don't know, it just wasn't a good feeling.
00:20:07.279 --> 00:20:10.559
So I started doing my own stuff.
00:20:10.559 --> 00:20:15.839
I would just take Advil for pain management at the time and make my own lotion.
00:20:15.839 --> 00:20:23.599
At that time, it just wasn't oil that I would make with sesame seed and black pepper and ginger essential oil for pain relief.
00:20:23.599 --> 00:20:31.519
Twenty-some years later, it's come highly involved into an arnica butter cream that I make for pain management.
00:20:31.920 --> 00:20:33.599
I was just thinking, is that arnica?
00:20:33.920 --> 00:20:37.039
Back then, you actually nobody ever talked about arnica butter.
00:20:37.039 --> 00:20:42.160
Sesame seed was the anti-inflammatory of choice back then.
00:20:42.160 --> 00:20:44.559
Now it's all arnica butter.
00:20:44.559 --> 00:20:50.960
But the black pepper and ginger mixing in them together is wonders.
00:20:51.599 --> 00:20:54.319
And how did you learn about aromatherapy?
00:20:54.319 --> 00:20:56.319
What turned you onto that and why did you go to the room?
00:20:56.559 --> 00:21:00.160
When I was 18, I just developed an interest in it.
00:21:00.160 --> 00:21:08.559
I went to this, I don't know, I guess it would be a spiritual herbalistic store, and I found these little bottles of essential oil.
00:21:08.559 --> 00:21:10.160
I'm like, I like the smell of them.
00:21:10.160 --> 00:21:13.119
And then they had a book on it, and I picked up the book as well.
00:21:13.119 --> 00:21:15.920
I'm like, oh my God, you can heal stuff with it.
00:21:15.920 --> 00:21:22.160
Now I've always been into natural healing because as a child, my parents took me to an iridologist.
00:21:22.160 --> 00:21:23.680
Do you know what that is?
00:21:24.000 --> 00:21:25.359
It's to do with the eyes.
00:21:25.599 --> 00:21:32.880
Yeah, where they look in your eye because I had bad childhood asthma, and the iridologist actually helped clear that up for me.
00:21:33.200 --> 00:21:33.839
Do you know?
00:21:33.839 --> 00:21:35.119
I'd have to tell you this.
00:21:35.119 --> 00:21:39.039
I was just reading, oh, this is so weird how things connect in, huh?
00:21:39.039 --> 00:21:43.359
Because I was just reading something because of another guest.
00:21:43.359 --> 00:21:50.640
This person does work with ancestral trauma, and she does iridology to do with ancestral trauma.
00:21:51.039 --> 00:21:52.799
I do know that can be done.
00:21:53.440 --> 00:21:54.400
Yeah, it's amazing.
00:21:54.400 --> 00:21:58.240
And she's written all these books and and yeah, she does that specifically.
00:21:58.240 --> 00:22:02.400
It's amazing what you can learn from the eyes.
00:22:03.279 --> 00:22:03.920
I know.
00:22:04.160 --> 00:22:06.319
Like, I didn't tell her anything about me.
00:22:06.319 --> 00:22:09.519
I didn't tell her about my childhood, asthma, nothing.
00:22:09.519 --> 00:22:15.599
And she just looked in my eyes and knew right away that I had asthma.
00:22:15.599 --> 00:22:19.920
And she's like, it's coming because there's a curvature in your spine.
00:22:19.920 --> 00:22:23.440
So she's like, I recommend you go see a chiropractor.
00:22:23.440 --> 00:22:26.480
She also gave me some herb supplements to take.
00:22:26.480 --> 00:22:34.559
I remember one of them was Hawthorne for the goop that would develop in my throat from the coming up, the mucus from the lungs coming up.
00:22:34.559 --> 00:22:36.960
And she made me change my diet.
00:22:36.960 --> 00:22:43.519
I could have no milk products for six months, strictly fish and chicken based, no red meats.
00:22:43.519 --> 00:22:48.319
And within six months to a year, my asthma cleared up.
00:22:48.319 --> 00:22:52.720
My asthma was to the point where every three months I was in the hospital.
00:22:52.720 --> 00:22:54.720
That's how bad it was.
00:22:54.720 --> 00:22:55.519
Yeah.
00:22:55.519 --> 00:23:02.400
So I think that's part of the reason I ended up getting into aromatherapy at 18 because that always stuck with me.
00:23:02.400 --> 00:23:13.680
How some doctors couldn't help me out, but this iridologist who looked in my things was able to clear something a doctor couldn't.
00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:17.920
Well, that's amazing that your your parents actually took you to somebody like that.
00:23:18.319 --> 00:23:19.119
That's the one thing.
00:23:19.119 --> 00:23:22.240
They've always been a little bit into the alternative.
00:23:22.240 --> 00:23:29.519
Even though they were strict Catholic, they were very much into let's not resort on pharmaceuticals.
00:23:29.519 --> 00:23:31.279
Let's try an alternative.
00:23:31.920 --> 00:23:39.279
So after you actually did what the iridologist told you and you changed your eating habits, did you come back to those eating habits?
00:23:39.599 --> 00:23:42.480
I did actually, and my asthma never returned.
00:23:42.480 --> 00:23:44.640
Wow, that's amazing.
00:23:44.640 --> 00:23:46.319
I don't drink milk.
00:23:46.319 --> 00:23:49.200
I did start drinking milk again for a long time.
00:23:49.200 --> 00:23:55.119
I just noticed it gave me leaky gut syndrome every time I was drinking milk.
00:23:55.119 --> 00:24:01.759
Meaning that when I would go to the bathroom, my foods would come out in almost solid form still.
00:24:01.759 --> 00:24:03.759
My body wasn't digesting it.
00:24:03.759 --> 00:24:10.960
So about almost four years ago now, I decided to stop drinking milk altogether.
00:24:10.960 --> 00:24:15.599
And it's been one of the best things that I've done for my health.
00:24:15.599 --> 00:24:17.599
I still eat cheese.
00:24:17.599 --> 00:24:19.200
I still have yogurt.
00:24:19.200 --> 00:24:25.519
I just drink milk or certain types of ice cream.
00:24:25.519 --> 00:24:29.279
Like I prefer vegan ice cream over dairy ice cream.
00:24:29.279 --> 00:24:35.279
Now, if they're homemade, I had this one homemade ice cream with raw milk.
00:24:35.279 --> 00:24:38.480
And I had my gut had no problems with it.
00:24:38.480 --> 00:24:48.799
But certain dairy ice creams, like you can hear my stomach rumbling from like a mile away because of the digestive issues I'm getting from the ice cream.
00:24:48.799 --> 00:24:54.480
I don't know it's if how they're pasteurizing the milk or what it is.
00:24:54.880 --> 00:24:59.680
I have no idea because it's weird that you would get it just with the milk and then not with the yogurt.
00:24:59.680 --> 00:25:01.200
But maybe that's something to do with it.
00:25:01.440 --> 00:25:04.079
But yogurt, it has different bacteria cultures in it.
00:25:04.079 --> 00:25:09.440
And I remember the iridologist even saying that because yogurt was one of the things I could still have.
00:25:09.440 --> 00:25:12.559
Certain cheeses I was still allowed to have.
00:25:13.359 --> 00:25:17.279
So your in your interest in holistic started there?
00:25:17.680 --> 00:25:19.039
It started there, yes.
00:25:19.039 --> 00:25:24.400
And I was about, I'd say seven, eight years old at the time.
00:25:24.880 --> 00:25:25.680
Wow, okay.
00:25:25.680 --> 00:25:29.039
And aside from aromatherapy, did you explore anything else?
00:25:29.039 --> 00:25:33.279
Because you walked into a store that had aromatherapy, so there must have been other stuff.
00:25:33.759 --> 00:25:35.680
I did get into energy healing.
00:25:35.680 --> 00:25:37.519
I just was reading books on it.
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:40.000
I wasn't professionally trained in it.
00:25:40.000 --> 00:25:43.359
And I would just try starting just doing it on myself.
00:25:43.359 --> 00:25:48.559
Like if I'd have a toothache, I just would channel energy to where my tooth was sore.
00:25:48.559 --> 00:25:53.359
And I'd notice I wake up the next day, I'm like, my tooth isn't sore anymore.
00:25:53.359 --> 00:25:56.799
So, and I just started reading a little bit about it.
00:25:56.799 --> 00:26:00.319
But yes, at that time it was mainly aromatherapy.
00:26:00.319 --> 00:26:04.960
I was getting into it until I met my ex-husband.
00:26:05.279 --> 00:26:05.519
Right.
00:26:05.519 --> 00:26:07.200
I was just getting back to that part.
00:26:07.200 --> 00:26:10.079
So when did you meet your your ex-husband?
00:26:10.079 --> 00:26:12.640
Was it shortly after you finished design school?
00:26:12.960 --> 00:26:16.880
Yeah, so I finished design school in '98.
00:26:16.880 --> 00:26:21.759
And I met my ex-husband two years later in 2000.
00:26:21.759 --> 00:26:24.799
We met actually, it was a week after New Year's Eve.
00:26:24.799 --> 00:26:26.559
We knew of each other.
00:26:26.559 --> 00:26:28.720
We weren't formally introduced though.
00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:31.119
And you thought it was the the perfect ... the perfect person?
00:26:32.160 --> 00:26:35.440
I thought he was the best guy ever.
00:26:35.440 --> 00:26:39.599
I've I've never had a real boyfriend, you could say.
00:26:39.599 --> 00:26:42.880
He was my first real boyfriend.
00:26:42.880 --> 00:26:46.160
And at that time, I didn't know what love bombing was.
00:26:46.160 --> 00:26:55.119
Now I do, after a lot of counseling and therapy, after that 22-year relationship, he love bombed me right from day one.
00:26:55.119 --> 00:26:59.839
I thought it was the greatest thing ever because I never had a man telling me that he loved me.
00:26:59.839 --> 00:27:03.039
And he just went overboard on how much he said.
00:27:03.039 --> 00:27:12.160
After the first two weeks, he told me how much he was in love with me already, how I was the perfect person for him, how he can't even picture a life without me.
00:27:12.160 --> 00:27:13.839
And I'm just like, really?
00:27:13.839 --> 00:27:16.480
I'm making somebody feel like this.
00:27:16.480 --> 00:27:24.079
Like it just took me back that what I was thinking was love at that time, now thinking about it, was not love.
00:27:24.079 --> 00:27:27.279
It was a toxic love, you could say.
00:27:27.279 --> 00:27:28.799
Very toxic.
00:27:29.279 --> 00:27:31.279
You were with him for 22 years.
00:27:31.599 --> 00:27:33.119
22 years.
00:27:33.599 --> 00:27:44.079
We met in January of 2000, and I ended up it ended up with me calling the police on him in November of 2021.
00:27:44.559 --> 00:27:48.240
So what happened over all these years with that marriage?
00:27:48.720 --> 00:27:54.079
Because I didn't know any better, like what narcissist was, what gaslighting was.
00:27:54.079 --> 00:27:58.880
Pretty much my counselor after I broke up with him told me all about it.
00:27:58.880 --> 00:28:07.119
And she's like, everything you've described, what you went through in your relationship, sounds like he was a narcissist and a gaslighter.
00:28:07.119 --> 00:28:11.519
He would make me feel bad for doing good things for him.
00:28:11.519 --> 00:28:18.799
He also was in this thing where I felt some days like his mother more than his wife or his partner.
00:28:18.799 --> 00:28:23.359
If I didn't cater to his every need, I was the bad one.
00:28:23.359 --> 00:28:25.599
It just went from 18 years.
00:28:25.599 --> 00:28:32.000
I thought we were 18 years happily together, not realizing the emotional abuse that was involved.
00:28:32.000 --> 00:28:37.759
Um yeah, so 18 years, and then all of a sudden he started drinking more heavily.
00:28:37.759 --> 00:28:40.880
I started noticing cocaine in the house.
00:28:40.880 --> 00:28:44.319
And that's when the physical abuse started on top of it.
00:28:44.319 --> 00:28:49.599
And that was the other part, which he did it once in 2018.
00:28:49.599 --> 00:28:52.240
I'm like, okay, he did it once.
00:28:52.240 --> 00:28:53.519
It was an accident.
00:28:53.519 --> 00:28:55.359
Nothing happened for another year.
00:28:55.359 --> 00:28:57.119
Then he did it again.
00:28:57.119 --> 00:29:01.599
Each time he would abuse me, it would be escalated, the abuse.
00:29:01.599 --> 00:29:12.000
Um, from a fractured hip to nearly the last time he abused me was in 2021 of July, where he nearly choked me to death.
00:29:12.000 --> 00:29:18.960
And he pretty much pushed me against the ground and started banging my head constantly against the floor.
00:29:18.960 --> 00:29:21.839
And I still didn't leave him at that point.
00:29:21.839 --> 00:29:30.319
It took for him to get very erratic again that November, where he tore up my driver's license.
00:29:30.319 --> 00:29:32.799
Well, actually, to this day, I don't know if he tore it up.
00:29:32.799 --> 00:29:33.920
It just disappeared.
00:29:33.920 --> 00:29:36.160
And he is like, I don't know what happened to it.
00:29:36.160 --> 00:29:38.480
He also tried to damage my car.
00:29:38.480 --> 00:29:42.160
So that morning I was gonna go up to my dad's house for visit.
00:29:42.160 --> 00:29:44.319
I'm like, Dad, I'm gonna be late coming to your house.
00:29:44.319 --> 00:29:47.039
My I have to get my driver's license renewed.
00:29:47.039 --> 00:29:53.680
My dad knew at this point that I was actually trying, I was coming up with an escape plan with my family doctor to leave him.
00:29:53.680 --> 00:29:58.079
So when I got up to get my driver's license done, they were like, What?
00:29:58.079 --> 00:29:59.200
Did you lose your license?
00:29:59.200 --> 00:30:04.799
I'm like, no, my husband took it on me and he won't, he either threw it out, destroyed it, or won't give it back.
00:30:04.799 --> 00:30:07.759
And they're like, Well, that's a criminal offense.
00:30:07.759 --> 00:30:10.799
And I also told them what he tried to do with my tires.
00:30:10.799 --> 00:30:17.839
And they told me, they highly, highly urged me to get a hold of what's called victim services here in Canada.
00:30:17.839 --> 00:30:21.039
So I called them up just to see what I can do.
00:30:21.039 --> 00:30:33.920
I had no intention of actually getting the police involved at this point, but because of what I had told them what happened since 2018, they're like, Because everything you've told us, we have to tell the police.
00:30:33.920 --> 00:30:36.799
And I'm like, okay, but what if I don't want you to?
00:30:36.799 --> 00:30:39.200
They're like, there is no if you don't want us to.
00:30:39.200 --> 00:30:40.880
It has to be done.
00:30:40.880 --> 00:30:58.480
So next thing I know, I'm at my dad's house with my dog, and there's three policemen at my desk, and they asked for witnesses to my injuries, and my dad obviously was one of them because he would see me bruised, but I would make excuses up for my bruises.
00:30:58.960 --> 00:31:00.240
Oh, so he didn't know.
00:31:00.480 --> 00:31:01.519
So he didn't know.
00:31:01.519 --> 00:31:06.000
The only person who knew was my closest girlfriend.
00:31:06.000 --> 00:31:22.240
She was the witness to my hip fracture because I went to go do a pedicure on her pretty much a week after it happened, and I was limping really badly, and it was summertime, so I had shorts on, and she saw the bruising up and down my leg.
00:31:22.240 --> 00:31:26.160
I think I even had bruises on my arm from him grabbing me.
00:31:26.160 --> 00:31:30.799
And she's like, You don't just fall and have bruises like that.
00:31:30.799 --> 00:31:35.680
Because I would just tell people, oh, I'm clumsy, I'm falling, I'm walking into stuff.
00:31:35.680 --> 00:31:38.640
And that's how I justified my bruisings.
00:31:38.640 --> 00:31:40.640
And so finally I confessed to her.
00:31:40.640 --> 00:31:45.519
I'm like, listen, my husband pushed me and she is like, you need to go to the doctor.
00:31:45.519 --> 00:31:47.680
She's like, my hip was swollen out.
00:31:47.680 --> 00:31:48.640
It was black.
00:31:48.640 --> 00:31:51.920
Like, I end up showing her the whole bruise down my hip.
00:31:51.920 --> 00:31:54.240
She's like, You're in so much pain.
00:31:54.240 --> 00:31:57.839
You shouldn't even be coming here and doing a service on me.
00:31:57.839 --> 00:32:00.160
I still didn't tell a doctor.
00:32:00.160 --> 00:32:04.480
I told my doctor that I fell, and that's how I got the injury.
00:32:04.480 --> 00:32:14.880
August September of 2021, I finally came clean to my doctor, and that's when we started coming up with an escape plan for me to leave my ex-husband.
00:32:14.880 --> 00:32:20.000
But before we had it in place, like I said, the police got involved because he just got so erratic.
00:32:20.480 --> 00:32:21.680
Yeah, thankfully.
00:32:21.920 --> 00:32:22.400
Yes.
00:32:22.720 --> 00:32:26.799
Well, okay, so you keep talking about you kept going back to your doctor.
00:32:26.799 --> 00:32:31.920
So, you know, normally, and you're talking about like you're not talking about a therapist.
00:32:31.920 --> 00:32:33.759
You're talking about a doctor, doctor.
00:32:34.160 --> 00:32:35.839
This was my family doctor at the time.
00:32:36.240 --> 00:32:37.119
A medical doctor.
00:32:37.119 --> 00:32:37.519
Yeah.
00:32:37.759 --> 00:32:46.799
Yes and she was the one who referred me to the counselor for going through abuse, which I was going through counseling while I was trying to leave him already.
00:32:47.279 --> 00:32:47.519
Okay.
00:32:47.519 --> 00:32:57.039
It's just I'm I'm asking because, you know, it's not typical that you hear somebody say that their medical doctor is trying to help somebody plan an escape route from, you know, her husband that beats her up.
00:32:57.680 --> 00:33:09.119
No, that was the counselor, but the family doctor was the one who when I told her about the abuse that was going on, she put me to this counselor that deals with abused women.
00:33:09.519 --> 00:33:12.960
And in Canada, it's a free service if you're going through that.
00:33:13.279 --> 00:33:17.440
So you were already seeing the counselor before the arrest happened.
00:33:17.839 --> 00:33:19.759
Before the arrest happened, yeah.
00:33:20.079 --> 00:33:20.400
Okay.
00:33:20.400 --> 00:33:23.920
And your husband had no idea you were doing these counseling sessions.
00:33:24.319 --> 00:33:31.279
He had no idea that I was seeing a counselor, that I was coming up with an escape plan, that I already saw legal advice.
00:33:31.920 --> 00:33:32.799
Gosh, all right.
00:33:32.799 --> 00:33:37.920
So it took you four years before you actually got out the door from the first incident.
00:33:38.480 --> 00:33:38.880
Yes.
00:33:38.880 --> 00:33:40.960
Because he only did it once a year.
00:33:40.960 --> 00:33:43.200
So it's called the grace period.
00:33:43.200 --> 00:33:47.519
He would give me this grace period where he would be so loving and caring again.
00:33:47.519 --> 00:33:53.519
You think everything is fine, and then boom, he does it again.
00:33:53.519 --> 00:33:58.720
And it almost turned out like clockwork, almost a year exactly to the date.
00:33:59.119 --> 00:34:04.559
And any idea why it was it was it a specific date that triggered him or something?
00:34:04.720 --> 00:34:10.880
Or no, because there was like a two, three month time span where it would range in between.
00:34:10.880 --> 00:34:12.320
But typically, yes.
00:34:12.320 --> 00:34:17.679
One time it just blew my mind it was because I left a streak on a window when I was cleaning.
00:34:17.679 --> 00:34:19.920
You didn't clean that window properly.
00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:24.159
And I'm just like, I'm sorry, I left a little streak on the window.
00:34:24.159 --> 00:34:29.760
Another time was he'd asked me to go on a play date because he's like, I know you don't like when I drink.
00:34:29.760 --> 00:34:33.519
Why don't you go with the one dog across the street on a play date?
00:34:33.519 --> 00:34:35.920
And I'm like, okay, that sounds like a good idea.
00:34:35.920 --> 00:34:38.480
And I'm like, I didn't I lost track of time.
00:34:38.480 --> 00:34:40.559
It was like two, three hours I was gone for.
00:34:40.559 --> 00:34:45.519
And when I came home, he just threw me around like a ragdoll for leaving him for so long.
00:34:45.519 --> 00:34:48.000
On his own advice.
00:34:48.000 --> 00:34:48.719
Yes.
00:34:48.719 --> 00:34:51.920
And he was brought up with an abusive stepdad.
00:34:51.920 --> 00:34:53.840
And this is the one thing that always stuck to me.
00:34:53.840 --> 00:34:58.400
He always promised me he would never turn out to be the monster that his stepdad was.
00:34:58.400 --> 00:35:04.320
The stories he told me what his stepdad did to his mother, he turned out to be that exact same person.
00:35:04.800 --> 00:35:07.760
Unfortunately, he never broke the cycle for himself.
00:35:08.079 --> 00:35:08.400
No.
00:35:08.400 --> 00:35:12.320
And now, like, people are like, oh, you probably wish him all this stuff.
00:35:12.320 --> 00:35:19.519
I'm like, actually, no, the only thing I wish, I've forgiven him for everything he's done, or else I wouldn't be where I am today in the person I am today.
00:35:19.519 --> 00:35:22.880
The thing I hope is that he gets the help he needs.
00:35:23.199 --> 00:35:30.320
Yeah, and that's something that you find often is that you've got these cycles that are happening and people don't know when they're happening.
00:35:30.320 --> 00:35:33.199
I mean, like you said with your father, you know?
00:35:33.199 --> 00:35:33.599
Yes.
00:35:33.599 --> 00:35:37.760
These generational things that are happening, these cyclical things that are happening.
00:35:37.760 --> 00:35:40.559
And if somebody doesn't break the cycle, it keeps happening.
00:35:40.880 --> 00:35:41.679
Exactly.
00:35:42.000 --> 00:35:52.320
You were actually saying that you were seeing a doctor because you also later discovered, so you had this issue with your cervical rib.
00:35:52.559 --> 00:35:52.960
Yes.
00:35:53.199 --> 00:35:54.639
So you were working on that.
00:35:54.639 --> 00:36:00.000
And how long did it take for you to actually get your arm in working order again?
00:36:00.480 --> 00:36:12.239
I've actually always struggled with issues with that arm up until about, I would say, three, four years ago, when I also nicked my fibromyalgia.
00:36:12.239 --> 00:36:16.880
And that the fibromyalgia started when the abuse started.
00:36:16.880 --> 00:36:19.199
And it might have started even a year before.
00:36:19.199 --> 00:36:23.840
It's hard to determine because the pain came on so gradually.
00:36:23.840 --> 00:36:27.440
And I just thought, okay, I'm in my 30s.
00:36:27.440 --> 00:36:31.920
Maybe it's just an age thing, this pain, until I was walking with a cane.
00:36:31.920 --> 00:36:39.599
And I'm like, this is not normal for a 30-some-year-old woman to be walking with a cane.
00:36:39.599 --> 00:36:47.760
And it got even worse when I had a boss in 2019 also sexual harassment in the workplace.
00:36:48.239 --> 00:36:48.559
Okay.
00:36:48.559 --> 00:36:51.119
And you're still doing design at this point?
00:36:51.440 --> 00:36:55.840
I was doing yes, design work and back-end web work.
00:36:56.159 --> 00:36:59.360
And how long did it take before you actually had a diagnosis?
00:36:59.360 --> 00:37:03.280
Because I know that's something that people say goes undetected for a while.
00:37:03.679 --> 00:37:07.599
I would say it took them, I would say about two years.
00:37:07.599 --> 00:37:10.239
They had me on so many medications.
00:37:10.239 --> 00:37:14.800
Once they did diagnose me, I was taking nine gabapentin a day.
00:37:15.039 --> 00:37:17.599
When you say the name of the drug, you'll have to say what it is because we don't know.
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:23.119
So gabapentin is a pill that they use for people who are epileptic.
00:37:23.119 --> 00:37:23.679
Okay.
00:37:23.679 --> 00:37:25.119
It's a horrible drug.
00:37:25.119 --> 00:37:34.480
Now that I'm off of it, like I was living in like this dream world, and I think that's another reason why I let the abuse happen because I wasn't clear-minded.
00:37:34.480 --> 00:37:38.320
I was like in a whole different just out there.
00:37:38.320 --> 00:37:42.400
Like I was high all the time on pharmaceutical drugs.
00:37:42.400 --> 00:37:48.320
So I was on that pill, and then I can't remember the names of the other pills, but I was on two other pills.
00:37:48.320 --> 00:37:56.079
I was taking 12 to 13 pills a day, if I remember correctly, just so I could function without having pain.
00:37:56.079 --> 00:38:03.039
Once I left my ex-husband, I slowly started weaning myself off of all the medication.
00:38:03.039 --> 00:38:05.679
Because I'm like, I'm by myself now.
00:38:05.679 --> 00:38:08.159
I have nobody to rely on.
00:38:08.159 --> 00:38:11.760
My mother had passed away in 2016.
00:38:11.760 --> 00:38:15.039
So I had no mom to go to anymore.
00:38:15.039 --> 00:38:21.360
I had my dad who was starting to show some signs of his deterioration.
00:38:21.360 --> 00:38:26.159
So I had nobody to help me with making life decisions.
00:38:26.159 --> 00:38:37.840
So I just slowly started getting off of it and I started researching herbal stuff that helped with energy, help with brain fog, natural stuff to help with pain.
00:38:37.840 --> 00:38:52.159
And between taking natural supplements, getting into sound healing, doing tuning fork therapy on myself, breastwork, meditation, I'm virtually now pain-free.
00:38:52.480 --> 00:38:58.639
And did you find a naturopath that helped you understand what all these different things were, or you just researched it yourself?
00:38:58.880 --> 00:39:00.719
I just researched it myself.
00:39:00.719 --> 00:39:04.800
I've always been that before my ex-husband, even I've always been that type of person.
00:39:04.800 --> 00:39:07.920
I would just always do my own research.
00:39:07.920 --> 00:39:11.599
One of my best friends has actually become Shilajit.
00:39:11.599 --> 00:39:16.639
It looks like a tar substance that I mix in my water every morning that I take.
00:39:16.639 --> 00:39:22.320
It gives me an energy boost like caffeine would without the crash of caffeine.
00:39:22.320 --> 00:39:28.000
The brain fog part, like even I got rid of the pain before I started taking the Shilajit.
00:39:29.039 --> 00:39:31.760
I still was suffering from major brain fog.
00:39:31.760 --> 00:39:35.039
That was the one thing that I couldn't get over.
00:39:35.039 --> 00:39:42.719
Soon as I started taking the Shilajit, next thing I know, I'm taking course after course after course because my brain's just on fire now.
00:39:43.360 --> 00:39:45.599
Your brain is cleared up, you want to know.
00:39:45.840 --> 00:39:46.239
Yes.
00:39:46.239 --> 00:39:48.719
And then I also started taking methylene blue.
00:39:48.880 --> 00:39:50.320
Now I have heard of that before.
00:39:50.320 --> 00:39:51.039
What is that?
00:39:51.280 --> 00:39:59.920
Methylene blue, okay, I might be quoting the date wrong, but it's been around since 1876, I believe.
00:39:59.920 --> 00:40:05.440
It started out as a dye that they used in surgeries.
00:40:05.440 --> 00:40:08.239
It's also a treatment for malaria.
00:40:08.239 --> 00:40:12.000
It helps with the malaria parasite breaking down.
00:40:12.000 --> 00:40:13.519
I started taking that.
00:40:13.519 --> 00:40:18.480
That was actually a more recent one, not last New Year's, but the New Year's before.
00:40:18.480 --> 00:40:29.119
I got really sick just with a chest cold, and a Reiki master that I was talking to at the time was telling me about how he takes methylene blue.
00:40:29.119 --> 00:40:33.760
According to me, psych, it helps build up your immune system a bit better.
00:40:33.760 --> 00:40:39.119
And I started taking that, and I even noticed my brain function getting even better after taking that.
00:40:39.119 --> 00:40:41.920
And then I did more and more research on methylene blue.
00:40:41.920 --> 00:40:45.119
They're even doing studies now for people with dementia.
00:40:45.119 --> 00:40:51.840
It's not making that the dementia gets better, but it's helping it stop the dementia in its tracks.
00:40:51.840 --> 00:40:55.920
So I was thinking of putting my dad on that because he has dementia.
00:40:55.920 --> 00:40:59.199
Unfortunately, he's on another pill where it interacts with.
00:40:59.199 --> 00:41:05.199
So I can't take him off that pill because that's what helps him sleep at night.
00:41:05.199 --> 00:41:05.760
Okay.
00:41:05.760 --> 00:41:14.719
Where if you take methylene blue too late in the afternoon, I don't know if everybody is like this, but myself, because there is a bit of an upper to it.
00:41:14.719 --> 00:41:17.920
If I take it past 2 p.m., I won't sleep at night.
00:41:17.920 --> 00:41:21.119
But I have noticed a difference also in the methylene blue.
00:41:21.119 --> 00:41:25.840
When I don't forget to take it, my joints tend to be more stiff.
00:41:25.840 --> 00:41:29.519
There's just little changes I noticed when I was taking it.
00:41:29.519 --> 00:41:35.440
And when I take, because once in a while I will take a break, just so my system doesn't get too used to all this stuff.
00:41:35.440 --> 00:41:45.039
I will take a break for anywhere from two weeks to a month, and I'll alternate between taking a break with the Shilajit and then with the methylene blue.
00:41:45.039 --> 00:41:49.840
So I'm always taking one because I don't want that fibromyalgia brain fog coming back.
00:41:50.079 --> 00:41:50.320
Yeah.
00:41:50.320 --> 00:41:54.000
And so when you were married, you had this as well.
00:41:54.000 --> 00:41:57.679
And how was your husband treating your disease?
00:41:58.239 --> 00:42:00.880
In the beginning, he was a bit supportive with it.
00:42:00.880 --> 00:42:05.519
And as time went on, sometimes he would say, Oh, it's psychosomatic.
00:42:05.519 --> 00:42:08.880
Then he would tell me, Oh, it's because you're not exercising enough.
00:42:08.880 --> 00:42:15.360
So I'd start exercising, and then he's like, Well, who are you trying to impress with losing this weight and exercising and looking good?
00:42:15.360 --> 00:42:18.159
I'm like, I'm trying to make myself healthier.
00:42:18.159 --> 00:42:19.679
I'm not impressing anybody.
00:42:19.679 --> 00:42:24.719
So every time I would try to get myself healthier, he would cut me down.
00:42:24.719 --> 00:42:39.199
And at one point, I actually, between my ex-husband and my boss, who was sexually harassing me, I let myself go really badly because I didn't want that attention from anybody.
00:42:39.199 --> 00:42:45.119
I ended up gaining a lot of weight, between 160 and 170 pounds.
00:42:45.119 --> 00:42:47.199
So I was quite overweight.
00:42:47.199 --> 00:42:48.800
I'm five foot eight.
00:42:48.800 --> 00:42:52.880
Right now I'm at about 135 pounds, which is a good weight for me.
00:42:52.880 --> 00:42:54.639
And that's with weight lifting.
00:42:54.639 --> 00:42:56.719
So a lot of my weight is muscle weight.
00:42:56.719 --> 00:43:06.000
And weightlifting is one of the best things that I've done for my body, especially missing those two bones and a muscle on this side.
00:43:06.000 --> 00:43:09.840
Because I still do go for what's called nerve block injections.
00:43:09.840 --> 00:43:18.719
Since I started weightlifting, though, I've been able to spread my nerve block injection from every six weeks to every 12 weeks.
00:43:18.719 --> 00:43:26.559
My pain specialist says if I keep going the way I am, I may no longer need them if I keep building more and more strength.
00:43:26.559 --> 00:43:35.360
And I do remember the doctors telling me that at that time, back in 2003, when I had my car accident, that I need to do more strength training.
00:43:35.360 --> 00:43:42.719
The only thing was my ex-husband always would put me down every time I try, and I would get better looking and in better shape.
00:43:43.119 --> 00:43:48.079
And so, because of that, you're actually prolonged the healing of your arm.
00:43:48.880 --> 00:43:49.840
I did, yes.
00:43:49.840 --> 00:43:56.320
The whole time I was with him, my arm would go like that, and then it would get stuck in that position.
00:43:56.320 --> 00:43:58.800
I couldn't get it up like that without any pain.
00:43:58.800 --> 00:44:01.039
And notice what I just Did okay.
00:44:01.199 --> 00:44:04.639
So for listeners, because if you're not watching the video, obviously you can't see that.
00:44:04.639 --> 00:44:14.880
She's actually put her arm up halfway, and then to show that's how far she could get it, and then she's put her arm completely straight up, as if up in her next to her head.
00:44:15.360 --> 00:44:20.800
Yes, and now I'm to the point where I get bored with traditional fitness.
00:44:20.800 --> 00:44:28.719
So I've done stuff that doctors told me would never be possible just because of missing bones and muscles.
00:44:28.719 --> 00:44:34.000
I like to call it pole fitness because people get the wrong idea when I say pole dancing.
00:44:34.000 --> 00:44:42.320
Pretty much it's acrobatics on a pole where I flip myself upside down on a pole and do different poses.
00:44:42.320 --> 00:44:45.280
What I do, there's no real dance involved.
00:44:45.280 --> 00:44:49.920
It's just using the pole as an acrobatic, or I also do aerial hoop.
00:44:49.920 --> 00:44:54.639
So you need a lot of upper body strength and your muscles to do that.
00:44:54.639 --> 00:44:57.679
And I've also gotten into aerial yoga.
00:44:58.079 --> 00:45:00.800
Yeah, but the pole dancing, I had another guest.
00:45:00.800 --> 00:45:02.960
She's got ankylosing spondylitis.
00:45:02.960 --> 00:45:09.599
And she also does pole dancing to manage that because she's got that and the fry I can't say this word.
00:45:09.840 --> 00:45:10.960
Fibromyalgia?
00:45:11.199 --> 00:45:11.599
Yeah.
00:45:11.599 --> 00:45:12.960
And she has them both.
00:45:12.960 --> 00:45:15.280
And so one of the things she does is she does that.
00:45:15.280 --> 00:45:17.679
And I think I told you she does belly dancing as well.
00:45:17.920 --> 00:45:20.559
Well, I had just got into belly dancing myself.
00:45:20.559 --> 00:45:22.800
I've had my first lesson in it.
00:45:23.199 --> 00:45:23.519
Yeah.
00:45:23.519 --> 00:45:26.880
So there must be something in the movement that helps with the bones and the spine.
00:45:27.519 --> 00:45:31.039
There is a lot, especially in dance movement, that helps.
00:45:31.199 --> 00:45:34.639
Like, because you're keeping your body moving at all times.
00:45:34.639 --> 00:45:41.840
And the way I what I tell people, find a fitness, it doesn't have to be traditional going to a gym, lifting weights, running.
00:45:41.840 --> 00:45:45.440
Find something that makes you happy, no matter what it is.
00:45:45.440 --> 00:45:49.440
Like I never thought doing pole would make me as happy.
00:45:49.440 --> 00:45:54.159
Being upside down, actually, makes me happy as a fitness exercise.
00:45:54.159 --> 00:45:59.440
Because when I look at pictures that people have taken from me doing my fitness stuff, all of them I'm upside down.
00:45:59.440 --> 00:46:16.239
Either in my aerial yoga swing that I have, I'm hanging upside down because it does do wonders for your back hanging upside down in one of those yoga swings where your lower back is suspended by the strap and it's like it does traction where it pulls your spine.
00:46:16.239 --> 00:46:27.599
If I don't do that after every workout, I've noticed the workouts I forget to do that on, I'll have a little bit of lower back pain when I wake up, or I'll wake up to lower back pain while I'm sleeping.
00:46:27.599 --> 00:46:33.760
But if I am in that for about two to five minutes every day, I have no back pain.
00:46:34.079 --> 00:46:39.760
So it's a nicer way of suspending yourself rather than, you know, these ones where these boards of people lie on.
00:46:40.480 --> 00:46:47.440
Yes, I prefer it better because I can I can twist my body in there so I can stretch at the same time.
00:46:47.440 --> 00:46:52.960
I found this one stretch because my pole is pretty much right behind it.
00:46:52.960 --> 00:46:57.360
So I can lean, I'll grab, and I'll get like this really good arm stretch.
00:46:57.360 --> 00:47:07.360
So I'll be upside down and holding onto my pole and have my other arm out back, and I'll be getting this amazing stretch to my body.
00:47:07.760 --> 00:47:10.880
And have you been doing yoga as well?
00:47:11.199 --> 00:47:19.519
I started doing yoga in the last month I was with my ex-husband because I started going to physiotherapy for my fibromyalgia.
00:47:19.519 --> 00:47:33.039
So I started doing yoga then, and then I started doing online yoga courses, and I came across this one course that I was taking called Kundalini Yoga, and I fell in love with it.
00:47:33.039 --> 00:47:40.159
It's a combination of Hatha yoga, meditation, chanting, and breathwork.
00:47:40.159 --> 00:47:48.239
And I fell in love with it so much that starting September 1st, I'm in Kundalini Yoga Teacher Training.
00:47:48.239 --> 00:47:56.960
And it fits into everything I do because I got my meditation teacher coaching certificate about a year and a half ago.
00:47:56.960 --> 00:48:01.920
I got my breathwork practitioner certificate.
00:48:01.920 --> 00:48:06.000
And like I said, I've been doing yoga now for four years.
00:48:06.000 --> 00:48:09.119
I was doing yoga prior to that too.
00:48:09.119 --> 00:48:13.199
But once again, my ex-husband put a stop to it.
00:48:13.199 --> 00:48:15.360
So I wasn't able to do it.
00:48:15.360 --> 00:48:19.360
Where at the spa I was working at, they had opened a yoga studio.
00:48:19.360 --> 00:48:26.880
If I was gone too long of periods of time, I would be yelled at really badly when I came home after my yoga.
00:48:26.880 --> 00:48:30.320
So I just stopped doing it because I didn't want to have the fights.
00:48:30.320 --> 00:48:35.280
Then that was probably in about 2013 I started doing yoga through my work.
00:48:35.760 --> 00:48:38.480
So yeah, you just said one key thing that I want to come back to.
00:48:38.480 --> 00:48:40.000
You said I worked in a spa.
00:48:40.000 --> 00:48:44.400
So how did you suddenly go from working in design to working in a spa?
00:48:44.400 --> 00:48:44.880
What happened?
00:48:45.199 --> 00:49:05.679
After my car accident, the doctors told me I wasn't allowed to use a mouse more than four hours a day because it would cut off the circulation from missing that stuff and the circulation issue I already had for my car accident said that I wouldn't be able to be sitting on a computer eight plus hours a day anymore.
00:49:05.679 --> 00:49:17.599
I needed a job where I had more body movement, and I went to what's called vocational rehab after a car accident to find what my body can do and what I like doing.
00:49:17.920 --> 00:49:18.960
Wow, what is that?
00:49:18.960 --> 00:49:20.320
Is that a Canadian thing?
00:49:20.320 --> 00:49:21.360
I've never heard of that.
00:49:21.599 --> 00:49:24.320
Um, it was part of my car insurance.
00:49:24.320 --> 00:49:25.679
They sent me to it.
00:49:25.679 --> 00:49:30.960
It's a thing when people have injuries and they can't go back to their job, they send you to.
00:49:30.960 --> 00:49:40.719
So they tested what my body could do, and then I had to fill out this paperwork to see what my interests were, and aesthetician came up.
00:49:40.719 --> 00:49:51.760
The end of 2005, I went back to school to be an aesthetician, and by 2006, I was an aesthetician, and I did that well, full time.
00:49:51.760 --> 00:49:57.920
I still do it uh for seniors, like I'll do manicures and pedicures, stuff that I can do that I'm not allergic to.
00:49:57.920 --> 00:50:05.119
So what happened was I became allergic to being an aesthetician, you could say, because of shellac nails.
00:50:05.119 --> 00:50:07.039
I don't know if you know what that is.
00:50:07.360 --> 00:50:08.800
No, no, what is that?
00:50:08.960 --> 00:50:11.599
It's a nail polish that sticks on your nails.
00:50:11.599 --> 00:50:13.519
It's like a gel almost.
00:50:13.519 --> 00:50:19.679
So I was a gel nail technician as well, and I pretty much became allergic to doing nails.
00:50:19.679 --> 00:50:22.960
It would give me third-degree burns on my body.
00:50:22.960 --> 00:50:34.400
Um, when I went for my allergy testing, it they put it on my back, the shellac, and it almost burnt a hole through to my bone within 12 hours of having it on my body.
00:50:34.400 --> 00:50:42.800
They wanted to have it on me for 48 hours, and I had to call the doctor that same day of him putting it on me, saying something is not right.
00:50:42.800 --> 00:50:44.880
Like I'm in so much pain.
00:50:44.880 --> 00:50:50.719
One of the girls put pulled the patches where it was working off of me, and she is like, You have a hole.
00:50:50.719 --> 00:50:53.440
You have a burn hole in your skin.
00:50:53.440 --> 00:50:59.440
So I went to the allergist, so he put it on, I think it was like at 7:30 in the morning.
00:50:59.440 --> 00:51:01.280
So it wasn't even 12 hours.
00:51:01.280 --> 00:51:11.440
By 5:30, I was back in his office and they had to remove it, and it was going down my spine, and it burnt a hole where he's like, I could start seeing your bone coming through.
00:51:11.679 --> 00:51:12.639
Oh my gosh.
00:51:12.880 --> 00:51:15.440
That's how severe my allergy was.
00:51:15.760 --> 00:51:18.880
What does that mean for people who are wearing nails like that?
00:51:19.119 --> 00:51:19.599
I don't know.
00:51:19.599 --> 00:51:26.320
I do remember working as an aesthetician, there was a girl, she would refuse to give them up, and she had such bad eczema around her nail beds.
00:51:26.320 --> 00:51:28.960
And I was telling her, I'm like, you you have to stop.
00:51:28.960 --> 00:51:31.519
Because that's how it started with me with slight eczema.
00:51:31.519 --> 00:51:33.840
And it progressed from there.
00:51:33.840 --> 00:51:37.760
I'm like, you need to stop because you will eventually, and that's what happened to me.
00:51:37.760 --> 00:51:40.000
I lost fingernails because of it.
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:41.599
But she refused to listen.
00:51:41.599 --> 00:51:44.800
And I told my boss, I'm like, I'm not gonna do her nails anymore.
00:51:44.800 --> 00:51:48.079
I don't want her seeing going through the route what I went through.
00:51:48.079 --> 00:51:53.039
And this has happened to me a couple times when I didn't believe in doing something on clients.
00:51:53.039 --> 00:51:55.199
Like I had a client come in with a nail fungus.
00:51:55.199 --> 00:51:57.199
I'm like, I'm not putting fake nails on her.
00:51:57.199 --> 00:52:00.320
Even my boss at that time, she is like, no, we're not gonna do that.
00:52:00.320 --> 00:52:03.119
She's like, well, I'm gonna go to a spa where they will do it.
00:52:03.119 --> 00:52:09.760
And then at this other spa that I was at with the girl where I said, no, I don't want to do her nails because she has a health condition.
00:52:09.760 --> 00:52:14.719
My boss, she is like, Well, I'll put a different nail tech on her, one who will do it.
00:52:14.719 --> 00:52:17.440
I guess I cared too much about people's health.
00:52:17.440 --> 00:52:21.440
And it wasn't about the money, it was about the people's health for me.
00:52:21.440 --> 00:52:24.079
Where with my boss, it was about the money.
00:52:24.079 --> 00:52:26.800
She's losing a client if I don't do them.
00:52:27.119 --> 00:52:28.079
Yeah, exactly.
00:52:28.079 --> 00:52:33.440
And what about the people, the other technicians, did they have experience problems as well?
00:52:33.440 --> 00:52:34.079
I mean,
00:52:34.079 --> 00:52:34.239
no.
00:52:34.400 --> 00:52:36.000
This is what the allergist told me.
00:52:36.000 --> 00:52:38.639
Some aestheticians just react badly.
00:52:38.639 --> 00:52:45.920
A lot of the girls I worked with were newer aestheticians, where I had been doing it for already 10 years.
00:52:45.920 --> 00:52:51.440
So for 10 years, these chemicals had been building up in my system where they were only a year or two into it.
00:52:52.079 --> 00:52:55.280
So, how did you actually purge these chemicals out of your system?
00:52:55.679 --> 00:52:56.960
Stopping to work with them.
00:52:57.199 --> 00:53:01.760
So, pretty much I had to give up being an aesthetician working in a spa.
00:53:01.760 --> 00:53:06.000
And yeah, I pretty much quit in 2018.
00:53:06.000 --> 00:53:19.119
And that's when I decided I'm gonna try again at 2019 working for the cell phone company where I had the boss who sexually harassed me, where I was doing backhand work because my shoulder had improved so much.
00:53:19.119 --> 00:53:23.920
And I was also helping at the front desk, so I wasn't doing full computer work at that time.
00:53:24.320 --> 00:53:31.039
I'm not even sure I want to ask what your husband is is saying to you all this time about you actually being an aesthetician, you know?
00:53:31.599 --> 00:53:32.960
He was hot and cold with it.
00:53:32.960 --> 00:53:38.559
So he loved it because he loved when I got tips and I brought cash money home because it gave him more drinking money.
00:53:38.559 --> 00:53:44.480
And he would actually push me, like I was working seven days a week because he wouldn't want to work.
00:53:44.480 --> 00:53:46.880
He just would want to stay at home and drink.
00:53:46.880 --> 00:53:50.880
Um, so even on my days off, I'd find clients on the side to do.
00:53:50.880 --> 00:53:53.599
And as soon as I come home, oh, how much money did you make?
00:53:53.599 --> 00:53:56.159
And I pretty much would have to hand him my money.
00:53:56.159 --> 00:54:05.280
We had a shared bank account, and he made sure of that right from pretty much six months after we moved in together, that we had a joint bank account.
00:54:05.280 --> 00:54:07.679
Our money was our money together.
00:54:07.679 --> 00:54:13.360
And then sometimes I want to come home and buy myself something and there was no money.
00:54:13.360 --> 00:54:15.360
And he's like, Well, you should have used it up sooner.
00:54:15.360 --> 00:54:16.559
I'm like, with what time?
00:54:16.559 --> 00:54:18.079
I work all the time.
00:54:18.079 --> 00:54:25.360
I lived on hand-me-down clothing for my sister probably for a good six, seven years because I couldn't afford to buy my own clothing.
00:54:25.679 --> 00:54:30.639
And were you ever talking about these strange things that he was doing with your friends?
00:54:30.960 --> 00:54:32.480
I thought it was all normal.
00:54:32.480 --> 00:54:39.599
Yeah, because I was groomed into it from the time I was 20 and a half years old till I was in my 40s.
00:54:39.599 --> 00:54:42.239
So to me, I didn't know any better.
00:54:42.239 --> 00:54:50.079
And yes, my parents were good parents, but they were also very controlling at the same time of what I did and who I hung out with.
00:54:50.079 --> 00:54:52.960
So controlling was always part of my life.
00:54:52.960 --> 00:54:59.920
So when I went from controlling parents to a controlling husband, I didn't think anything of it.
00:54:59.920 --> 00:55:05.519
I didn't think of needing boundaries, having alone time.
00:55:05.519 --> 00:55:10.239
Like to me, that just wasn't normal, you could say.
00:55:11.039 --> 00:55:20.239
When you started seeing the counselor and she started telling you, okay, these are all signs of a narcissist, and this is an abusive relationship you're in, and this is not normal.
00:55:20.239 --> 00:55:22.800
Did you have a hard time believing her?
00:55:23.199 --> 00:55:31.360
No, because by that point I knew how toxic it was, like deep down, because there were days where I would pray to God that I wouldn't wake up.
00:55:31.360 --> 00:55:34.000
I just was so down and out.
00:55:34.000 --> 00:55:40.000
Like I remember being in my bedroom, like just going, God, please, please, just don't let me.
00:55:40.000 --> 00:55:43.119
If I have to wake up to this, I don't want to wake up anymore.
00:55:43.119 --> 00:55:46.639
That's to the point I got, I just didn't want to wake up anymore.
00:55:46.639 --> 00:55:52.960
And there was a couple times where he pushed me so hard that I felt like swallowing all my pills.
00:55:52.960 --> 00:55:55.519
I felt like taking a knife to myself.
00:55:55.519 --> 00:55:56.800
But he wouldn't let me.
00:55:56.800 --> 00:55:59.760
He saw that point and he's like, No, you can't do that.
00:55:59.760 --> 00:56:05.920
But now I'm thinking going back, I'm like, yeah, he probably just didn't want that because then he'd lose his income.
00:56:06.320 --> 00:56:08.480
Okay, so you finally got out of that.
00:56:08.800 --> 00:56:11.679
I finally got out of that and got help.
00:56:12.239 --> 00:56:14.800
Yeah, so how long did your counseling continue afterwards?
00:56:16.000 --> 00:56:19.679
Because she didn't she didn't want to pill me up or anything.
00:56:19.679 --> 00:56:25.119
She would do EMDR talk therapy, which was excellent.
00:56:25.119 --> 00:56:28.559
She even was the one who told me about meditation.
00:56:28.559 --> 00:56:36.079
So I was actually in and out with counseling just because I had a lot of PTSD, like from the physical abuse.
00:56:36.079 --> 00:56:47.920
So I saw her for I would say a year, and then I felt like everything was getting better, and then I had to meet my husband ex-husband in virtual court, and then the PTSD came back again.
00:56:47.920 --> 00:56:49.840
Like I'd have flashbacks.
00:56:49.840 --> 00:56:56.400
I'd go in my living room, and I all I'd see was me on the ground being choked and my head smashed to the ground.
00:56:56.400 --> 00:56:59.519
I saw her on and off for two years, you could say.
00:56:59.519 --> 00:57:03.440
And then I started taking courses myself in meditation.
00:57:03.440 --> 00:57:07.039
I took spiritual life coaching courses.
00:57:07.039 --> 00:57:09.840
I started taking all these courses just for myself.
00:57:09.840 --> 00:57:19.199
I got into Reiki, which, like I said, the energy healing has always been a part of me since I can remember like curing my own toothaches.
00:57:19.199 --> 00:57:27.119
So I just dove deeper and deeper into the whole spiritual realm and sound healing.
00:57:27.119 --> 00:57:30.880
Sound healing has been wonders for me.
00:57:30.880 --> 00:57:33.360
Like tuning forks are my best friend.
00:57:33.599 --> 00:57:35.599
Now, how did you discover sound healing?
00:57:36.000 --> 00:57:49.920
Through one of my really good friends, who was actually my client at the time as an aesthetician, um, he lived with me for a short while, and he turned me on to sound bolds.
00:57:49.920 --> 00:57:52.880
And I just fell in love with sound bowls.
00:57:52.880 --> 00:58:03.199
Then I started getting books on sound healing, and I got my first tuning fork, and I just tried it where I would have little bits of pain.
00:58:03.199 --> 00:58:05.360
And I'm like, oh, this is so nice.
00:58:05.360 --> 00:58:12.159
And I noticed I had swelling in my one knee that I had injured years ago, slipping on black ice and falling on concrete.
00:58:12.159 --> 00:58:18.480
Um, so once in a while that knee swelled up, and I put a tuning fork to it, and the next day the swelling was gone.
00:58:18.480 --> 00:58:20.400
Then I got into sound bowls.
00:58:20.400 --> 00:58:26.400
I bought my first set of sound bowls back in 2023 now.
00:58:26.719 --> 00:58:28.480
The crystal or Tibetan ones?
00:58:28.800 --> 00:58:30.000
Crystal sound bowls.
00:58:30.000 --> 00:58:32.320
I picked it up off of Amazon.
00:58:32.320 --> 00:58:38.320
And then I found this course online that introduced me to sound bowls.
00:58:38.320 --> 00:58:43.920
And two years later, it took me two years, and I finally got my master's in sound healing.
00:58:44.239 --> 00:58:46.400
And what exactly is a master's in sound healing?
00:58:46.400 --> 00:58:47.119
I've not heard of it.
00:58:47.360 --> 00:58:48.880
Master's in sound healing.
00:58:48.880 --> 00:58:52.000
Pretty much I do sound baths for clients.
00:58:52.000 --> 00:58:59.199
I'm actually holding my first group sound bath in September, which I'm excited and nervous about at the same time.
00:58:59.199 --> 00:59:03.599
As of this point, I've only done it one-on-one or a very small group.
00:59:03.599 --> 00:59:05.119
I've never done a large group.
00:59:05.119 --> 00:59:07.199
This is going to be 12 plus people.
00:59:07.199 --> 00:59:13.280
So sound baths, depending on which sound bowls I use, like I do chakra sound baths.
00:59:13.280 --> 00:59:25.519
So I can do anything from like tuning your chakras to helping with pain management on depending on which sound bowls I'm hitting and what frequency I'm using.
00:59:25.519 --> 00:59:29.679
Like with the tuning forks, they're a lot more frequency-based.
00:59:29.679 --> 00:59:43.519
So depending on what area of the body that I'm working on with the tuning forks is what tuning forks I'm gonna pull out because each area of your body has a different frequency that it responds to, if that makes sense to you.
00:59:43.760 --> 00:59:45.119
Yes, it does to me, yes.
00:59:45.760 --> 00:59:47.440
Because my dad has dementia.
00:59:47.440 --> 00:59:50.559
I just bought a 40 hertz tuning fork.
00:59:50.559 --> 00:59:52.480
I've been doing a lot of research on it.
00:59:52.480 --> 00:59:55.119
It's supposed to be wonderful for dementia.
00:59:55.119 --> 00:59:59.760
And the one I was looking at came with what they're called footies.
00:59:59.760 --> 01:00:02.719
It came with three different kinds you could choose from.
01:00:02.719 --> 01:00:07.440
The one was just a massage footy to use for massaging.
01:00:07.440 --> 01:00:11.679
The other one was rose quartz, which is more for your heart chakra.
01:00:11.679 --> 01:00:14.960
And I'm like, it doesn't seem like that should work for the brain.
01:00:14.960 --> 01:00:18.880
So I got the amethyst, which is for your third eye and brain.
01:00:18.880 --> 01:00:21.280
So I end up going with the amethyst footy.
01:00:21.280 --> 01:00:25.199
When you use a tuning fork, if you don't have a footy, you can still use them.
01:00:25.199 --> 01:00:28.159
It just feels nicer with a footy on the skin.
01:00:28.159 --> 01:00:30.719
It's not quite as harsh feeling.
01:00:30.719 --> 01:00:33.199
It's more like of a rounded surface.
01:00:33.199 --> 01:00:33.679
Yeah.
01:00:33.679 --> 01:00:38.239
I was looking for a clear quartz one, like I have on my other tuning forks.
01:00:38.239 --> 01:00:42.480
I got this whole kit of 10 footies with different crystals on them.
01:00:42.480 --> 01:00:46.480
And these are ball crystals that roll, so you can use it in massage.
01:00:46.480 --> 01:00:49.199
Like I even use I want to do facials on people now.
01:00:49.199 --> 01:00:58.000
I use tuning forks in my facials, and it does help for stimulation of your muscles and your collagen reproduction.
01:00:58.000 --> 01:01:01.760
So I still do aesthetics, I just do it more holistic now.
01:01:01.760 --> 01:01:06.800
Like I can do a non-surgical facelift with tuning forks and crystals.
01:01:06.800 --> 01:01:12.159
Even doing Reiki on the face has anti-aging properties to it.
01:01:12.159 --> 01:01:14.400
A lot of people don't realize that.
01:01:14.400 --> 01:01:20.400
Like, I'm trying to come up with this customized sound healing Reiki facial right now.
01:01:20.400 --> 01:01:23.360
That's all with my own homemade products.
01:01:23.840 --> 01:01:29.280
Yeah, this is just a little side tangent because in Singapore I worked with a lot of people who did sound healing.
01:01:29.280 --> 01:01:34.480
There was this one guy, and he travels all over the place, goes to Egypt, Japan, wherever.
01:01:34.480 --> 01:01:37.760
And he also does light language as well.
01:01:37.760 --> 01:01:46.880
But he has absolutely stunning crystal bowls that have like they're amethyst or rose or they're infused with sapphire.
01:01:47.599 --> 01:01:49.599
Yes, I've seen those bowls.
01:01:50.079 --> 01:01:51.519
They cost an arm and a leg.
01:01:51.760 --> 01:01:55.760
That's why I would have those kind in a heartbeat.
01:01:55.760 --> 01:01:59.840
Actually, my next goal, but it's so expensive.
01:01:59.840 --> 01:02:04.239
Have you seen the either crystal bowls or Tibetan bowls that you can lie in?
01:02:04.559 --> 01:02:08.800
No, I have not seen those, but I mean I've seen some really big bowls, but not ones you can lie in.
01:02:09.280 --> 01:02:10.639
There's this one crystal bowl.
01:02:10.639 --> 01:02:15.920
You ex you sit in it and in the bottom, and then they put a crystal bowl on top of you.
01:02:15.920 --> 01:02:22.239
So you're like in this bowl cocoon, and they put the vibration off the bottom and the top one.
01:02:22.239 --> 01:02:27.599
And just today I saw a Tibetan bowl where it's big enough that you can lie in.
01:02:27.599 --> 01:02:31.360
It's lined with pillows and you can set off the vibration.
01:02:31.360 --> 01:02:36.400
I did get a Tibetan standing bowl for my clients, and oh my god, I love it.
01:02:36.400 --> 01:02:45.760
I pretty much have them stand in it, and then I have my crystal pyramid on top, and you can tell when their body's out of sync.
01:02:45.760 --> 01:02:49.519
When before I start a session, I've done this for so many of my clients now.
01:02:49.519 --> 01:02:55.280
I'll put them in the bowl and I put the pyramid over top, and it's you can hear the disharmony.
01:02:55.280 --> 01:03:03.840
After I'm done a session, I'll do it again, and you can hear all of a sudden the harmony going from the Tibetan bowl to the crystal pyramid on top.
01:03:03.840 --> 01:03:07.280
It's amazing how you can see that before and after.
01:03:07.599 --> 01:03:14.559
Another sound healer that I know who's been on the show does a lot of things with all sorts of different types of instruments to do sound healing.
01:03:14.559 --> 01:03:17.280
This might be something you you'd be interested in.
01:03:17.280 --> 01:03:27.760
As a community service, she goes to like because in Singapore they have like a lot of community centers for old folks where they come and and they do activities there.
01:03:27.760 --> 01:03:34.000
And she goes there and she does sound healing for them and they love it.
01:03:34.000 --> 01:03:39.760
And she does sound healing and she does like chair yoga to get them moving because a lot of them.
01:03:40.400 --> 01:03:41.440
I do that with my dad.
01:03:41.679 --> 01:03:48.239
The only reason I don't do it for people is because I don't have right now a yoga certificate.
01:03:48.239 --> 01:03:50.320
I just am trained myself.
01:03:50.320 --> 01:03:52.800
So I will do it for my father.
01:03:52.800 --> 01:03:55.519
I will do chair yoga with him.
01:03:55.519 --> 01:04:02.960
I also because I do have a pole in my house, which is perfect for a senior citizen to hold on to for balance.
01:04:02.960 --> 01:04:07.840
I'll do exercises with him for balance using my pool where he holds on.
01:04:07.840 --> 01:04:14.800
He'll like lift his leg up and down, up and so it's a type of yoga, but assisted where you're holding on to something.
01:04:14.800 --> 01:04:16.880
Because he is very mobile still.
01:04:16.880 --> 01:04:19.119
He's just losing his flexibility.
01:04:19.119 --> 01:04:22.320
He still walks five kilometers a day with me.
01:04:22.320 --> 01:04:24.159
Oh wow, that's quite good.
01:04:24.159 --> 01:04:26.239
He still runs 100 meters.
01:04:26.239 --> 01:04:31.519
Unfortunately, it's just the brain is going and I'm trying so many different methods now.
01:04:31.519 --> 01:04:34.559
Like I said, I even got a tuning fork just for him.
01:04:34.960 --> 01:04:37.119
What does he think about all these things that you're doing?
01:04:37.519 --> 01:04:40.960
He keeps telling my sister that I'm saving people's lives.
01:04:40.960 --> 01:04:57.679
I'm not sure if he's completely grasping it, but he keeps telling people how good work I do for other people with helping them out mentally because of my neurohealth practitioner background, also, which is pretty much spiritual coaching, just more scientific based.
01:04:57.679 --> 01:04:59.679
They go so hand in hand.
01:05:00.079 --> 01:05:01.679
What is this thing that you just mentioned?
01:05:01.679 --> 01:05:04.239
You're a neuro health practitioner.
01:05:04.239 --> 01:05:05.199
What is that?
01:05:05.519 --> 01:05:18.960
Pretty much I had to study about neuroplasticity of the brain, like how your synapsis works, your neurotransmitters, how it helps with like your neuroplasticity.
01:05:18.960 --> 01:05:23.280
So, like baby steps, how you can improve your brain with baby steps.
01:05:23.280 --> 01:05:30.320
So, what I tell people who ask me how I got through with fibromyalgia, I'm like, well, I would take baby steps.
01:05:30.320 --> 01:05:37.440
I would go for a 10-minute walk with my cane and two minutes without my cane in the beginning.
01:05:37.440 --> 01:05:41.440
And then I would gradually use my cane less and less.
01:05:41.440 --> 01:05:45.440
And then I got to the point where I could walk 10 minutes without a cane.
01:05:45.440 --> 01:05:48.079
Next day I would add a minute to it.
01:05:48.079 --> 01:05:51.679
Every day I would add 30 seconds to a minute to my walk.
01:05:51.679 --> 01:05:55.920
And that's pretty much what neuroplasticity is is baby steps.
01:05:55.920 --> 01:05:59.679
And that's one of the main ways I overcame.
01:05:59.679 --> 01:06:03.920
Also, my fibromyalgia, just adding just minute little fractions.
01:06:03.920 --> 01:06:18.079
So, neurohealth practitioner is pretty much teaching people in baby steps anything from your mindset to your physical health and how your physical health and mental health go hand in hand.
01:06:18.079 --> 01:06:22.320
If you're not taking care of your physical health, your mental health will go downhill.
01:06:22.320 --> 01:06:35.840
And that was another course I took for myself, but it helps me also help other people, like if they're not spiritually inclined, helping them more scientifically describe how to overcome things.
01:06:36.320 --> 01:06:40.639
You just said something key there that you're clear of your fibromyalgia.
01:06:41.039 --> 01:06:43.039
Well, they say you never get rid of it.
01:06:43.039 --> 01:06:54.719
It's called in remission because I could have a flare-up, which winter time will cause me, depending on how severe our Canadian winters are, because they really range.
01:06:54.719 --> 01:06:58.960
Last year was a very extreme cold, snowy winter.
01:06:58.960 --> 01:07:02.800
The year before that, we didn't get under zero degrees Celsius.
01:07:02.800 --> 01:07:05.440
And last year we had minus 31.
01:07:05.440 --> 01:07:07.679
So again, we have extremes.
01:07:07.679 --> 01:07:09.039
And I never know.
01:07:09.039 --> 01:07:18.079
So, like last winter, because of how extreme it was, my fybro did act up a little bit, but it wasn't where I was walking with a cane or anything.
01:07:18.079 --> 01:07:19.440
I just felt stiff.
01:07:19.440 --> 01:07:25.599
I felt a little lethargic, and I just listened to my body, and I will do rest and relaxation on those days.
01:07:25.599 --> 01:07:33.119
But yeah, the year before, I did not have one fibromyalgia flare up because we never hit under zero degrees that year.
01:07:33.119 --> 01:07:43.760
I even remember going for a walk in February with my dad at the park and they had to mow the lawn, which is unheard of in Canada, mowing your lawn in January and February.
01:07:43.760 --> 01:07:47.840
But it had to be done that year because it was such a warm winter.
01:07:47.840 --> 01:07:52.400
I didn't have to pull out a shovel once that year or a snowblower.
01:07:52.800 --> 01:07:58.480
So all of these practices, I mean, you have basically done everything to heal yourself.
01:07:58.880 --> 01:07:59.360
I have.
01:07:59.599 --> 01:08:00.400
First and foremost.
01:08:00.400 --> 01:08:03.280
And then you've now turning it outward to help other people.
01:08:03.599 --> 01:08:04.480
Other people, yes.
01:08:04.880 --> 01:08:06.400
As well as you're getting these certifications.
01:08:06.719 --> 01:08:07.039
Yes.
01:08:07.039 --> 01:08:12.880
And I'm constantly learning new things, and it just keeps my brain going.
01:08:12.880 --> 01:08:14.559
And my clients like it too.
01:08:14.880 --> 01:08:20.239
Yeah, because you are providing in-home aesthetic services for clients who are in their 80s and 90s.
01:08:20.479 --> 01:08:20.880
Yes.
01:08:20.880 --> 01:08:21.840
They must love it.
01:08:21.840 --> 01:08:27.439
I have such a soft spot for our seniors and the stories they have to tell you.
01:08:27.439 --> 01:08:30.079
I'd love listening to their stories.
01:08:30.640 --> 01:08:36.399
But you also, and we're just going to go into it a little bit because we're going to do a special episode on this.
01:08:36.399 --> 01:08:42.000
You have learned all sorts of different Reiki that I have never even heard of.
01:08:42.000 --> 01:08:45.119
But when I you were talking, I was like, what's that?
01:08:45.119 --> 01:08:46.319
No, I haven't heard of that.
01:08:46.319 --> 01:08:46.880
What's that?
01:08:47.119 --> 01:08:52.079
Well, that's Kundalini Reiki, which encompasses six different forms of Reiki.
01:08:52.640 --> 01:08:52.880
Okay.
01:08:52.880 --> 01:09:00.079
And so that's just a preview because we are going to do a very special episode that talks about all these different Reiki's.
01:09:00.399 --> 01:09:01.680
There's more than that.
01:09:01.680 --> 01:09:05.840
I can only talk about what I know though, but I do know there's a lot more.
01:09:05.840 --> 01:09:10.720
There's, I think, 22 or 32 different forms of Reiki altogether.
01:09:10.720 --> 01:09:12.319
Like I do two forms.
01:09:12.319 --> 01:09:18.720
I do the kundalini Reiki and I do the traditional form Usui Reiki, which has to do with symbols.
01:09:18.720 --> 01:09:22.079
Where kundalini Reiki does not deal with symbols.
01:09:22.079 --> 01:09:29.279
You get your crystalline Reiki, your DNA Reiki, your past life Reiki, um, birth trauma Reiki.
01:09:29.279 --> 01:09:31.840
Did I mention DNA Reiki already?
01:09:31.840 --> 01:09:32.640
No, I did not.
01:09:32.640 --> 01:09:34.239
And then Kundalini Reiki.
01:09:34.560 --> 01:09:37.760
Well, we will go into those in more detail the next time.
01:09:38.000 --> 01:09:44.800
But I do have to admit, crystalline Reiki is the one I use the most in my treatments, because I'll just give you a little preview.
01:09:44.800 --> 01:09:49.840
It breaks up trauma in the body from injury or emotional traumas.
01:09:49.840 --> 01:09:51.760
It breaks up the you know when you have a knot?
01:09:51.760 --> 01:09:52.159
Yep.
01:09:52.159 --> 01:09:58.079
So if I do crystalline Reiki over that knot and then I massage over it, it's like the knot's gone.
01:09:58.079 --> 01:10:01.359
It breaks up the tension in there and the crystals.
01:10:01.359 --> 01:10:04.399
Because when you have a knot like that, it's formed of little crystals.
01:10:04.960 --> 01:10:06.399
Yeah, I know what you're saying.
01:10:06.399 --> 01:10:12.560
Because when I go to my Rolfer and she's feeling around and she goes, Oh, I'm thinking, what is that?
01:10:12.560 --> 01:10:13.840
I feel that, you know?
01:10:13.920 --> 01:10:15.119
I feel these little
01:10:15.119 --> 01:10:16.960
Some massage therapists will call it ropey.
01:10:18.159 --> 01:10:23.359
She says she says it's ropey, but she says it's the little crystals that are in there.
01:10:23.359 --> 01:10:33.439
That's perfect though, because if it's crystals, then I guess also with the healing frequencies, with the tuning forks and with the crystal bowls, that must help as well.
01:10:33.760 --> 01:10:34.000
Yeah.
01:10:34.000 --> 01:10:34.399
Yeah.
01:10:34.399 --> 01:10:38.640
One of my favorite treatments to do is chakra balancing massage.
01:10:38.640 --> 01:10:43.039
Because I'm an aesthetician and in Canada, aestheticians can perform massages.
01:10:43.039 --> 01:10:49.279
It's a combination of like a traditional hands-on massage mixed with Reiki.
01:10:49.279 --> 01:10:53.760
And I'll go over each chakra, balancing each chakra.
01:10:53.760 --> 01:11:01.279
And then I actually, if somebody's really out of tune, I'll even bring out my tuning forks, which I have tuning forks for all the chakras.
01:11:01.279 --> 01:11:05.600
And I'll um go over the chakras with each tuning fork.
01:11:05.600 --> 01:11:15.199
And if there's really out of balance, I'll even get my Tibetan chakra bolts and put them over the chakras that are really affected and just get the chakras all humming.
01:11:15.520 --> 01:11:16.960
You mentioned sisters.
01:11:16.960 --> 01:11:19.039
So what do your sisters think about what you're doing?
01:11:19.359 --> 01:11:19.520
One sister
01:11:19.369 --> 01:11:20.079
Do you give them treat?
01:11:20.079 --> 01:11:22.479
Do they does she get treatment from you?
01:11:22.800 --> 01:11:25.279
She unfortunately does not believe in what I do.
01:11:25.279 --> 01:11:27.520
She says it's a placebo effect.
01:11:27.520 --> 01:11:33.039
The only thing she does believe in is the neurohealth practitioner I done because it's science-based.
01:11:33.039 --> 01:11:41.840
Even though I have showed her a lot of scientific studies that have been done around sound healing, and she is like, well, that's more frequency, not sound.
01:11:41.840 --> 01:11:45.840
I'm like, frequency and sound go hand in hand.
01:11:45.840 --> 01:11:48.640
You can't have sound without frequency.
01:11:48.640 --> 01:11:51.039
And you can't have frequency without sound.
01:11:51.039 --> 01:11:53.520
I'm gonna get to her one of these days.
01:11:53.520 --> 01:11:57.760
She'll get an injury or something, and then I'll help her with my tuning forks.
01:11:58.159 --> 01:12:05.840
But she's seen how you have been healing yourself with all of these different tools, and so she still doesn't fully believe?
01:12:06.399 --> 01:12:09.359
She thinks it's a placebo effect what I'm doing on myself.
01:12:09.680 --> 01:12:11.760
Where my dad does not.
01:12:11.760 --> 01:12:14.239
He sees it as actual true healing.
01:12:14.239 --> 01:12:14.800
Okay.
01:12:14.800 --> 01:12:18.399
And I'm actually trying something new out on my next door neighbor.
01:12:18.399 --> 01:12:28.159
She has agreed this morning to she's having knee surgery, and I told her after a week after she's done, I want to use my tuning forks to see if I can speed up her recovery time.
01:12:28.159 --> 01:12:32.399
So every other day I'm gonna go over to her and use my tuning forks on her.
01:12:32.640 --> 01:12:35.359
And has she ever had any other type of session with you?
01:12:35.600 --> 01:12:36.720
Her husband has.
01:12:36.720 --> 01:12:44.560
When I was going through Reiki training, he was because you need to do so many people before you can level up in Reiki.
01:12:44.560 --> 01:12:47.279
So he was one of my people that I did.
01:12:47.279 --> 01:12:54.319
Um, he also, when I was playing around with my chakra balancing massage, I just said, come on over.
01:12:54.319 --> 01:12:57.279
I want to try a new modality that I'm working on.
01:12:57.279 --> 01:13:01.840
I always ask my friends and family to be my guinea pigs, and a lot of them love it.
01:13:01.840 --> 01:13:07.119
Um, she was working full-time as a teacher, so she never had as much time.
01:13:07.119 --> 01:13:10.880
Now she's retired, so maybe she'll be my guinea pig now.
01:13:10.880 --> 01:13:12.800
And she is open to this stuff.
01:13:12.800 --> 01:13:15.680
Like even today, because her surgery's tomorrow.
01:13:15.680 --> 01:13:21.359
So I worked on her knee today a bit, and she's like, Can you come back and do my other knee after your podcast?
01:13:21.359 --> 01:13:26.399
Uh she's like, I feel a big difference, and I'm overcompensating with my other knee now.
01:13:26.399 --> 01:13:34.720
So yeah, after I'm done here, I'm gonna go tune her other knee for her because she just after that one treatment on her bad knee, she's having the surgery in tomorrow.
01:13:34.720 --> 01:13:36.640
She've already felt a difference.
01:13:36.960 --> 01:13:40.880
So I want to ask you a couple of things to do with advice and tools.
01:13:40.880 --> 01:13:46.239
So you've been obviously learning lots and lots and lots of different things.
01:13:46.239 --> 01:13:53.439
Has any of the things that you have learned just you've sort of said, okay, nah, that's just that's not working.
01:13:53.439 --> 01:13:54.720
That's not for me.
01:13:55.039 --> 01:14:01.520
No, no, everything I learned, it's almost like my higher self is guiding me to these things.
01:14:01.520 --> 01:14:06.079
I almost feel like in past lives I was doing all this stuff already.
01:14:06.079 --> 01:14:08.800
And it's just coming back to me now again.
01:14:08.800 --> 01:14:11.439
Like a lot of the stuff almost comes naturally.
01:14:11.439 --> 01:14:20.720
Even when I had my Reiki master, my first one, I would give her massages and she's like, You're channeling Reiki through these massages.
01:14:20.720 --> 01:14:22.479
And I'm like, How?
01:14:22.479 --> 01:14:24.560
She's like, it's in you.
01:14:24.560 --> 01:14:31.039
Like she did past life regression, and she found out that in a bunch of lives that I was a healer.
01:14:31.039 --> 01:14:33.279
And she's like, it's always been in you.
01:14:33.279 --> 01:14:35.520
It's just dormant inside of you.
01:14:35.520 --> 01:14:39.279
So to me, a lot of this stuff just comes really naturally.
01:14:39.279 --> 01:14:40.960
I can't explain.
01:14:40.960 --> 01:14:47.439
Ever since I was young and started with aromatherapy, I've always felt like there was something different in me.
01:14:47.760 --> 01:15:03.119
So, what do you advise for somebody who is having something that a doctor has said they can't heal or that they can't be cured, or that they're only gonna have a limited amount of mobility or something similar to you?
01:15:03.520 --> 01:15:08.000
I would suggest to them explore what makes you happy, first of all.
01:15:08.000 --> 01:15:10.880
If it's calling out to you, explore it.
01:15:10.880 --> 01:15:12.720
There's no harm in it at all.
01:15:12.720 --> 01:15:16.239
If it feels right to you, that's what you should be doing.
01:15:16.239 --> 01:15:26.399
You can explore so many different healing modalities, and I think that's why I'm addicted to learning because they've all worked in different ways for me mentally, physically, emotionally.
01:15:26.399 --> 01:15:30.399
They all have their own methods for healing.
01:15:30.399 --> 01:15:33.920
And yeah, what I would suggest, just try one for yourself.
01:15:33.920 --> 01:15:36.960
Try one, and if it doesn't, try something else.
01:15:36.960 --> 01:15:38.319
Never give up, though.
01:15:38.319 --> 01:15:39.279
Never give up.
01:15:39.279 --> 01:15:41.840
That's one word of advice I have.
01:15:41.840 --> 01:15:43.680
You're stronger than you think.
01:15:43.680 --> 01:15:47.359
Like I never thought of myself as a strong person at all.
01:15:47.359 --> 01:15:53.760
And the last four years have shown me how much strength mentally and physically I actually have.
01:15:54.159 --> 01:16:03.279
Okay, so in terms of a tool, what is a good tool that you would recommend somebody who is a very beginner into exploring things?
01:16:03.279 --> 01:16:09.119
What is a tool that you do that is a simple tool that they can use for whatever reason?
01:16:09.520 --> 01:16:10.720
Basic breathing.
01:16:10.720 --> 01:16:13.600
Because breath can control pain.
01:16:13.600 --> 01:16:20.079
Your breath can control pain, it can control your sleep, it can control anxiety.
01:16:20.079 --> 01:16:22.239
It's all in how you learn.
01:16:22.239 --> 01:16:26.640
Like I just Googled in the beginning, like, how can I help my sleep?
01:16:26.640 --> 01:16:31.119
And I learned about different methods of breathing that can help you sleep.
01:16:31.119 --> 01:16:44.640
I learned about different breathing methods to help control pain, which that one I kind of knew because when I had bad pain days, I would just close my eyes, take a deep breath in, and try to double elongate my exhale.
01:16:44.640 --> 01:16:55.039
I would just feel like I could feel the pain coming from the top of my head, and I would imagine it just going out through my feet while I was breathing it out.
01:16:55.039 --> 01:16:56.720
And I could feel my pain.
01:16:56.720 --> 01:17:02.319
It wasn't much, but slowly and slow more and more I felt the pain helping to go away.
01:17:02.319 --> 01:17:07.279
It was this girl I actually met on the internet when I was talking about my journey with her.
01:17:07.279 --> 01:17:12.640
She's like, I just finished taking this breath practitioner course, breath work practitioner course.
01:17:12.640 --> 01:17:15.199
And she's like, You would be excellent at it.
01:17:15.199 --> 01:17:23.199
She's like, just with all the stuff you already do, which was meditation at that time, spiritual coaching, and the sound healing.
01:17:23.199 --> 01:17:31.359
And I fell in love with breath work just because of how, first of all, it helps with pain and it helps balance your nervous system.
01:17:31.359 --> 01:17:35.119
So the type of breath work I do is called somatic breath work.
01:17:35.119 --> 01:17:48.399
The first half of breathing, we activate your sympathetic, so your fight and flight by breathing in through the mouth, out through the mouth for half an hour in three different stages.
01:17:48.399 --> 01:17:54.560
And then the second half, it's the parasympathetic, so it puts you into your rest and digest.
01:17:54.560 --> 01:18:00.880
And it's in through the nose, elongate through the mouth or nose, whichever feels more comfortable to you.
01:18:00.880 --> 01:18:06.319
And then when you get the both activated, it helps balance out your nervous system.
01:18:06.319 --> 01:18:11.840
And all the research I'm doing, a lot of people's issue is a disregulated nervous system.
01:18:11.840 --> 01:18:15.199
You're not expressing your emotions properly.
01:18:15.199 --> 01:18:18.000
And I know with myself, that's what a lot of it was.
01:18:18.000 --> 01:18:22.079
Well, was with my ex-husband, I wasn't allowed to express my emotions.
01:18:22.079 --> 01:18:24.640
If I did, I was looked down as weak.
01:18:24.640 --> 01:18:29.199
Or I was told, I'm shedding my crocodile tears again.
01:18:29.199 --> 01:18:39.119
So because I heard the crocodile tears so often, I just held it, I held it all in to the point where I felt like I was an emotional zombie, you could say.
01:18:39.119 --> 01:18:44.159
My nervous system and my chakras, everything was so disregulated.
01:18:44.479 --> 01:18:51.680
I can just imagine somebody might be listening to this and going, okay, so I'm going to breathe in and out through the mouth for half an hour.
01:18:51.680 --> 01:18:55.600
I mean, is this something that you would you advise somebody to do on their own?
01:18:55.920 --> 01:18:57.680
No, you cannot do it on your own.
01:18:57.680 --> 01:18:59.600
You need a guided practitioner.
01:18:59.600 --> 01:19:21.119
You can do on your own breathing for a couple minutes, five minutes max, but doing a full hour-long journey, I don't recommend doing it because even when I do it over Zoom, I have my clients facing a video camera facing them so I can see how they're breathing, if they're starting to hyperventilate or not.
01:19:21.119 --> 01:19:31.359
And then there's key phrases we use through the breath work, which is a little bit like NLP, neurolinguistic programming, to help reprogram the mind.
01:19:31.359 --> 01:19:34.479
So the first half is like a clearing phase.
01:19:34.479 --> 01:19:41.600
And I would never recommend anybody because if you're not doing the breathing technique properly, you can hyperventilate easily.
01:19:41.600 --> 01:19:45.840
You can get tetany, which is like cramping of the hands and feet.
01:19:45.840 --> 01:19:49.760
You can almost paralyze your whole body by breathing the wrong way.
01:19:50.159 --> 01:19:50.479
Okay.
01:19:50.479 --> 01:19:59.600
That's really, really, really good to know because I got my mind keyed into the 30 minutes of breathing in and out, and I'm thinking, oh, somebody might have just keyed into that too.
01:19:59.680 --> 01:20:08.000
And no, because like I said, it's done in three the 30 minutes is done in 10 minute sections where there's breath holds and everything involved.
01:20:08.319 --> 01:20:08.640
Right.
01:20:08.960 --> 01:20:10.159
Just keep that clear.
01:20:10.159 --> 01:20:10.880
Okay.
01:20:10.880 --> 01:20:13.600
So what exactly is it that you do offer?
01:20:13.600 --> 01:20:17.199
Because we've been sort of bouncing all over the place talking about different things here.
01:20:17.199 --> 01:20:18.640
So what is it that you're doing?
01:20:18.960 --> 01:20:20.640
I offer breath work.
01:20:20.640 --> 01:20:23.279
I offer sound healing.
01:20:23.279 --> 01:20:31.439
I offer meditation, spiritual coaching, uh, neurohealth practitioner, which is another form of coaching.
01:20:31.439 --> 01:20:33.359
I offer Reiki.
01:20:33.359 --> 01:20:37.680
I offer chakra balancing massage.
01:20:37.680 --> 01:20:43.920
And then I also do a lot of therapies where I combined a lot of my treatments.
01:20:43.920 --> 01:20:48.399
Like I'll do a sound healing breath work chakra balancing session.
01:20:48.399 --> 01:20:53.039
I'll do a chakra alignment sound bath meditation.
01:20:53.039 --> 01:21:01.199
I have this one thing where I call my ultimate holistic experience, which you're with me for three hours almost.
01:21:01.199 --> 01:21:17.920
And it depends on the person, anywhere from two and a half to three hours where we go through like a mini breath work session, meditation, sound healing, chakra balance, and massage, pretty much everything that I offer combined into one treatment.
01:21:17.920 --> 01:21:22.960
And that's actually the one where I get the most powerful results for a lot of my clients.
01:21:23.279 --> 01:21:25.039
But that has to be in person.
01:21:25.520 --> 01:21:26.399
It has to be in person.
01:21:26.800 --> 01:21:27.680
Because of the massage.
01:21:27.920 --> 01:21:29.199
Because of the massage, yes.
01:21:29.199 --> 01:21:34.720
And the Reiki can be done distant, which I do a lot of distant Reiki for people.
01:21:34.720 --> 01:21:45.840
But a lot of people say the hands-on, especially when it comes to my crystalline Reiki mixed with the massage, is just more powerful than just doing distant crystalline.
01:21:46.239 --> 01:21:48.079
But the coaching and the other services, you can do online.
01:21:48.239 --> 01:21:52.079
The coaching and the breath work can be done online as well, yes.
01:21:52.399 --> 01:21:54.399
And where is it that people can connect with you?
01:21:54.399 --> 01:21:57.119
You have a website and Instagram, I believe.
01:21:57.359 --> 01:22:02.319
I do have a website, www.soundbreathhealing.ca.
01:22:02.319 --> 01:22:04.399
I'm on Instagram.
01:22:04.399 --> 01:22:09.920
It's sound.breath.healing, as well as Facebook.
01:22:09.920 --> 01:22:18.000
And I've actually turned my personal Facebook now into also my, it's called Michelle Soundbreath.
01:22:18.000 --> 01:22:21.119
Facebook's weird and the name I get to give myself.
01:22:21.439 --> 01:22:25.680
Okay, so all of those links will be in the show notes, most definitely.
01:22:25.680 --> 01:22:30.800
I think you've also got some meditations on your website, if I remember correctly.
01:22:31.279 --> 01:22:32.560
No, I have sound baths.
01:22:32.560 --> 01:22:35.279
I have sound baths on my social media.
01:22:35.600 --> 01:22:35.920
Okay.
01:22:36.239 --> 01:22:39.600
Instagram is weird how they limit how long you can do.
01:22:39.600 --> 01:22:45.199
Where Facebook, I have, I think some of them go almost half an hour long, some of my sound baths on Facebook.
01:22:45.520 --> 01:22:45.840
Okay.
01:22:45.840 --> 01:22:49.760
And so the best way is to wear earphones, I imagine, if you listen to those.
01:22:50.079 --> 01:22:50.880
It is, yes.
01:22:50.880 --> 01:22:53.680
Or if you have like a surround sound speaker.
01:22:53.680 --> 01:22:57.600
I'm actually playing around with different mics to get the sound even better.
01:22:57.600 --> 01:23:03.920
Right now I'm using just an attachment on my cell phone, and sometimes you hear too many background sounds.
01:23:03.920 --> 01:23:07.520
Like my last one I didn't post because my air conditioner came on.
01:23:07.520 --> 01:23:10.560
And that's all I could hear was the background sound of that.
01:23:10.560 --> 01:23:14.880
So I'm like, as much as I liked it, I didn't like the background noise I could hear.
01:23:15.199 --> 01:23:16.479
Yeah, it's tricky.
01:23:16.640 --> 01:23:17.119
It is.
01:23:17.359 --> 01:23:21.680
So there are definitely some things that you can go and check out that belong to Michelle.
01:23:21.680 --> 01:23:31.680
And also please do come back and listen to the special episode where we're going to talk about all these different types of Reikis that fall under the umbrella of Kundalini Reiki.
01:23:31.680 --> 01:23:34.960
Is there any final words that you want to add before we close?
01:23:35.359 --> 01:23:42.239
Just to tell people never give up on yourself and always be your authentic self, even if people make fun of you.
01:23:42.239 --> 01:23:48.000
You will never be happy if you're not truly authentically yourself, and you'll never love yourself.
01:23:48.000 --> 01:23:51.119
It all comes from self-love and self-acceptance.
01:23:51.439 --> 01:23:56.079
And with those beautiful words of advice, we'll close now.
01:23:56.079 --> 01:23:58.800
So thank you, listeners, and thank you so much, Michelle.
01:23:58.800 --> 01:23:59.600
Thank you for everything.
01:23:59.600 --> 01:24:01.920
I can't wait to do the part the session about Reiki.
01:24:01.920 --> 01:24:03.039
It's going to be very interesting.
01:24:03.279 --> 01:24:04.239
I can't either.
01:24:04.479 --> 01:24:06.880
Okay, everybody, until the next time.
01:24:06.880 --> 01:24:10.479
Have a wonderful, beautiful day wherever you are in this vast world.
01:24:10.479 --> 01:24:11.680
Bye, everyone.