Maximizing Media For Your Brand | A Live Panel On Content Strategy & Personal Branding

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Welcome to VideoMaker.
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Podcast that has passed the highlight reel and takes you straight into the raw behind-the-scenes stories of creatives and makers.
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I'm Carly, founder of the Good Five Media, a woman-owned and operated video production agency and creative studio space.
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Every week on VideoMaker, I sit down with filmmakers, creators, and creative entrepreneurs for a deep, honest conversation you don't typically hear.
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The late nights, the pivots, the breakdowns, the shape, the breakthroughs.
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These are the conversations and stories that people like me and so many other creatives need to hear.
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This is a space for growth, for lessons, for community, a place where we can learn from each other's real unfiltered journeys.
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This is Video Maker.
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Let's get rolling.
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Welcome back to another episode of Video Maker.
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I'm your host, Carly, and if it looks a little different on the cameras, that's because we are live.
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We have a live studio audience tonight for this conversation.
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Tonight is part of our studio sessions events that we host each month where people can come in and connect in a small intimate group, hear from amazing panelists and speakers, and have the opportunity to just find new collaborations, opportunities, spark new ideas, and it truly is like my favorite night of the month.
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So I'm super excited for tonight.
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And with that being said, let's just jump on in to talk about our amazing panel.
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Aisha, I'm gonna have you take it away.
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Can you give us an introduction on who you are and what you do?
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Yes.
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So my name is Aisha Marshall.
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I am gosh, um new to speaking at post-motherhood.
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I've spoken on many stages and done many things, but now that I have a son, I'm like, who am I in this space?
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Um so I own a transformation company.
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We sell products, but one of the things that work really well for our community are guided journals.
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Um and not like a day daily journal that you open up one day and then close the next day.
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These journals bring you through an entire transformation arc, and so each exercise compounds on itself to bring you through the patterns that you're done repeating in your life.
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Um, and that's called butterfly season.
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And so I'm an alchemist.
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I love this.
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Thank you, Aisha.
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Donnie.
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Hi, everybody.
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My name is Donnie Starkins, and I'm a life coach, uh, yoga and mindfulness teacher, retreat leader.
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I'm also a group facilitator.
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I work in the recovery world.
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I've been teaching yoga for uh about 13 years now.
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And um, my message to the world is that the most important relationship we'll ever have is the one that we have with ourselves.
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So I started a retreat about 10 years ago called Love Yourself.
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And the reason why I started it is because no matter where I would go and teach and speak, the common theme was that we don't love ourselves enough.
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Whether it's the way we put everybody else's needs before our own needs, or um, we all have some version of a not enough story, not good enough, not I mean, fill in the blank, it's there.
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And so that's actually what connects us all.
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And so that message and that tag has just stuck for a while now, and um, that's the message that I choose to carry in helping other people find their purpose.
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So good.
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Yes, I love it.
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Fun fact the first retreat I ever attended was Donnie's.
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Oh my god.
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I was pregnant with my first, you brought dogs, and I was fucking allergic.
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So but it was a great experience.
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It was a great experience.
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Hi everyone, I am Priscilla Perez.
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I am a master rhythm cycling coach.
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I am a creator and lover of all things movement.
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Um, at the heart of everything I do is taking everyone through experiences that really just like honor movement.
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So we have so much energy stuck up here, up here, up here.
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And something about just like moving through it, um, you know, is is there's so much power in that.
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So I create experiences that bring people together and I do it really fucking good.
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So that's that.
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Thank you.
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Validation.
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Well, tonight's conversation is all about maximizing media for your brand.
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And those that are in the audience actually had an opportunity to ask some questions when they bought their ticket.
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So we'll save those towards the end and we will open it up for some QA too.
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So if you guys have more questions that you want to ask, just keep them in your back pocket and know that a mic will be passed around here before you know it.
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Um, but Priscilla, I'd love to start with you first.
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Um, take us back to the beginning.
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When did you realize that your personal brand or the content you were creating could actually become a business asset?
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So I would say I started, I'm gonna speak in the terms of Instagram because I feel like that was like the first, you know, platform that I looked at.
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Um, a little different than just sharing life and and fun and really seeing the effects of what promotion is.
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And it was when I became a coach and I started teaching uh rhythm cycling about eight years ago, which is wild.
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And I was like, okay, I gotta get on this social media bullshit, you know, and I gotta like do this thing in a way where it's gonna be different than other people.
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But it really just started with promoting my classes, yeah.
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Um, bringing people in and um promoting my name more than that.
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And then I feel like throughout the years, when I realized that there was so much power behind media, and and you know, what they're seeing is just a glimpse of it.
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Um, when I started turning into what I did into an actual business, it was like, okay, so I can send something out and it goes right into their phone.
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You know, it was just like this idea of like once you just start, um, you're just seeing the effects of it, and it's kind of the snowball effect of like, okay, if I keep going, this will be really interesting.
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But you know, I've learned a lot in the past, you know, eight years.
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But I would say like when I it really started with just wanting to promote my classes.
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For sure, yeah.
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And it's evolved so much too.
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Like all of that.
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Donnie, I'd love to know kind of when that began for you.
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Yeah, as I heard that question, it it brings me back to about a year into teaching yoga.
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I was um my whole life has been, I'll set some context, has been to undo this whole idea of validation and and caring what other people think.
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And it's rooted in just you know, childhood stuff and then being a college baseball player.
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I played college baseball at ASU until my senior year, and I had a very traumatic, it was the fifth surgery I had on my knee, and that ended baseball for me.
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And um, for many years, sent me into a world of addiction.
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I was addicted to pain pills.
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I did other drugs too, but pain pills are really what had its grip on me.
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And then I was like dying in my addiction spiritually, physically.
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My mom kept saying, You need to go to yoga.
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And I was always saying yoga's for girls and hippies.
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I'm not doing that shit.
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Like that was the fixed mindset.
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Like, as things were not going well for me at the time, and I finally went once, and I knew in that moment I would do it the rest of my life.
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That one class I went to from a physical standpoint, but little did I know what it would do for the mind and the soul.
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And so I ended up going to teacher training, and about a year after teaching, I was still in my ego a bunch in the beginning, wanting to have you know a lot of people in my classes, wanting people to like me.
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And I went to this leadership training led by Sean Korn called Off the Mat Into the World.
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And in the training, she asked a question.
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She said, How dare we not?
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And when she said, and by the way, we were in like lizard pose, which if you know that's like a deep hip opener.
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So she was just like poking and all this stuff was coming up.
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And for me, it was how dare I not share my story?
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Where I was teaching in Scottsdale, and like I knew people like that on the outside were showing that they had it all together, but I knew they were dying on the inside.
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And so, how dare I not share my story?
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And so we were tasked with going back into our community and creating a service project, and I created something called um Sunday Yoga Service.
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I partnered up with Anton Mackey, a mentor and friend of mine who also teaches.
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And in that first um event that we did, I shared my story, and then from that day, my life changed completely.
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All of the things I was so ashamed of, the past, um, and I didn't tell like all the details of the story, but I told the glyph, the Cliff Notes version of it, and everything changed from that day.
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That night I got a Facebook message from some lady that her husband had just died of alcoholism like a month prior, and whatever I had said helped her heal.
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And it was in that moment where I was like, oh my gosh, my everything I was so worried about, my past now had become my greatest asset.
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Yeah.
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Um, and the the sharing it just removed removed the shame of it, and it gave people permission and an understanding that they're not alone.
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And so that activated everything and the opportunities that I've gotten because of just sharing my story and choosing like um impact over being anonymous has changed my life forever.
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Yeah, that's really powerful.
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I'm really excited for sharing that, Donnie.
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Aisha.
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Um mine is pretty interesting because I've lived a lot of lives as an entrepreneur.
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I'm sure you guys have probably had 45 businesses before the business today.
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Um, and that was me.
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And so I used to run a creative agency, and in that creative agency we did branding, marketing, and PR.
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And so we were the people that were helping other people maximize their brand and their media.
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And that led me to realizing that I was just so totally out of alignment.
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And if there's anyone that's into astrology here, it was my Saturn return and it just like woke up to myself and um burned everything to the ground, all everything went.
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And I had to come back to social media, to business, to making money, and I really didn't know.
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I was just stumbling my way through it because the old way of doing something online, which is like find someone else's pain point, and then pour salt on the wound and tell them how you can solve their problem, and then that will continue to build, and people will buy from you.
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And I had the awareness to know that like that's such scarce energy, and that that's not where I want to live, but I don't really know what is the opposite of that, and what does that look like practically on my social media page today?
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Like, I had no idea, and so I was still discovering myself, and I would always text Lindsay, who's in the back.
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Um, I feel like I'm in my cocoon season, like I just can't get out of it.
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And that's what birthed butterfly season.
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And so I happened to be in a mastermind with a girl, and I shut my business down, and I was like, I have nothing, my identity was tied to my company.
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I had Forbes 30 under 30.
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Like I was the type of person still working through it, where if I knew that that was flashy to you and I had it, I didn't even need to get you to validate me.
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I just knew that you knew that I had this thing, I know you respect it, I have it, so you must respect me.
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And that is just a not aligned way to handle life.
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And so working through all of that, a gal asked me to speak on stage and I was like, I have nothing to talk about.
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I've I've I'm not doing business anymore, and that's what birthed butterfly season.
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I'm landing the planet, I promise.
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So in butterfly season, um, is where these guided journals came about.
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I was in therapy, and my therapist would ask me to do homework, and homework was like writing whatever the prompts were.
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And I couldn't write like in paragraph form.
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I had to, the only way that I understood these questions was in frameworks.
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And so I would write them like with diagrams and frameworks, and I would be like, hey, this is my Miro app PNG image.
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I know you wanted me to write this out and like copy, but this is like the only way I understand what you're asking me.
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And what I realized, she was like, This is like actually phenomenal.
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Like, do you realize people could use this to get out of their own suffering?
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And I'm like, Oh, yeah, I mean, I guess so.
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Long story short, I start to develop a journal with those frameworks.
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And what I realized, the question that I didn't have the answer to when I shut my agency down that is not scarce showing up online, is just being able to show people that there is a roadmap, that these are your patterns, this is how you can work through them, and this is the way out.
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And so when people think about maximizing your media, everyone's like wanting to pour fire on a what is it?
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Gasoline on a fire.
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Gasoline on a fire by like poking at your wounds and being so scarce about marketing, but really maximizing your media is on the other end of it.
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Like, this is how I can actually help you navigate through something that's resonant.
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People want that.
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And that is like the undercurrent energy that I feel like ends up attracting more to your media.
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And so we think about it from this like surface level, do all these things, follow these steps.
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And yes, there's like compound interest on that, but if your energy is right, it all just like navigates towards you.
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And so it wasn't until this season of my life where I realized that like maximizing my media is is I don't have to follow the script of being scarce.
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I can just be what's true to me, be in my own energy, actually who I am, and be a light, even though I've never seen anyone do it this way.
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Like it can still work for me, and I don't have to like highlight somebody's pain point and make them feel a way to get them to click and share and like and do this.
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Oh my gosh, yes.
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Oh my gosh.
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Okay, this was this is kind of piggybacking off of that.
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And anyone can pop in and and answer this one, but it's really around like how there is so much pressure to constantly be creating.
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So the question is how do you determine what is actually worth creating versus creating just to stay visible?
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I I would love to start.
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Go, girl.
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I please creation is like actually, and I'm if you can't tell, like I'm a fucking hippie girl.
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But I can speak marketing and I can help you understand like how this applies to life.
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And so, creation, in my opinion, is like you using like your own energy and building something, and it's like helping you meet yourself.
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The only way that you can create something that is worth creating, and then I think everything is worth creating, but something that you can end up monetizing off of is refining that skill of creation.
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Creation is meeting yourself.
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I created journals by meeting my own self, and then I put that into a product and I sell it.
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What people think creation is is she created a journal, let me pull her journal, run it in Chat GPT, reconstruct the framework, and then make my own journal.
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Like creation is abundant.
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Like anybody can have anything, all everything is for everyone, and creation is meeting yourself.
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The only way that I was able to make this journal was by trying to meet myself and realizing there's something actually here that can help other people.
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And I think that it's the excitement in the building that you're like, let me put that out there.
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That feels really good.
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I know that whatever when I get so excited about it, I can now see that it's a breadcrumb and I'm like, oh, this shit is about to take off because this is fucking good.
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Yeah.
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Not because I'm trying to sell you about how fucked up your life is.
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I'm just like, this is gonna change your life, buy it, right?
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I'm just excited about it because it's good because I created it, but in that creation, I'm meeting myself.
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I when I make my journals, I have to actually accept the invitation because creation is meeting myself.
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So when I'm making something, I know that I'm actually going to be going through that process as well.
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I was telling Lindsay I'm making a money journal, it's just launching soon, but I also have to accept all of the invitation that is looking at all my money shit.
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Yes.
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And so I've been declining that invitation for a while.
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And it's been like poking and poking and poking and poking, and in it, I know that it's refining me, but I'm also like, this shit is so beautiful, it's gonna free so many people as it's free.
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Myself, and I'm crying because I'm in it, because I have to take the action.
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Like that is creation, and that's when you know it's something worth creating, not worth creating, something worth selling.
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Everything is worth creating.
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Yeah, all whatever it is that feels fun to create.
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If you want to write a rap on your notes app when you're going to bed at night, do it.
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It doesn't mean you have to sell it, but like you're just creating something, you're getting your shit off.
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Yeah, you're expressing like that.
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Is everything is worth creating, but I think the excitement around something shows you like what's worth selling.
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That's so good.
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Is there anything else you guys want to add to that?
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I mean, I'm thinking about um, there's a bunch of creatives in here.
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People read the creative act, the book, the creative act.
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Oh my gosh.
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Rick Rubin's book, The Creative Act.
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Yeah, he talks about it in there.
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Well, I think about to the question, it's all about what is my intention?
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Or sometimes everything's about intention, really.
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And a question I'll ask myself is like, what am I chasing and why?
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But in the book, he also talks about how if you have an idea that you're excited about and you don't take action on that idea, it's not unlikely for that idea to find its voice through another maker.
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And it's not because that other artist stole your idea, it's because that idea's time has come.
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And the essence of the book is we all have this creative act, this act of devotion, a devotion to God or the universe.
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That that's that's our purpose is to share this gift.
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And there's one main thing that stops people from sharing their gift.
00:17:26.319 --> 00:17:27.279
Do you all know what it is?
00:17:27.759 --> 00:17:29.039
It's caring what other people think.
00:17:29.519 --> 00:17:30.160
Yeah, yeah.
00:17:30.319 --> 00:17:33.279
And he says, like, we have no idea what anybody's gonna think.
00:17:33.440 --> 00:17:43.279
So to let that stop you from doing the thing, um, you know, it it crushes a lot of people's lives where they're still living, but they're not really living their truth.
00:17:43.599 --> 00:17:49.119
And so, you know, and he talks about it in the in the creative process, you have to detach from the outcome.
00:17:49.519 --> 00:17:58.240
Because if your intention in creating it is a certain outcome or it's to get a certain amount of likes or a certain amount of um buys, that's not the right intention.
00:17:58.400 --> 00:18:03.359
So you create it because this is that this is so meaningful to you, and once it's out there, it's out there, right?
00:18:03.599 --> 00:18:04.880
Yeah, yeah, I feel that.
00:18:05.200 --> 00:18:09.039
That's so beautiful, and also like as like as beings, right?
00:18:09.200 --> 00:18:12.960
Like, we are so sensitive, we are so, especially as creators, right?
00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:25.519
You're putting something out there, you're birthing, you know, whether it's something tangible and experienced or what, and you you you want everyone to really feel what you feel when you create it, and that holds so many people back, right?
00:18:25.599 --> 00:18:27.839
Because you're like, but wasn't it so good?
00:18:28.000 --> 00:18:37.599
And they're like, maybe, yeah, you know, and that that that feeling of like that detachment is so necessary, but it's also strengthening the muscle, the creative muscle, and it's so important.
00:18:37.759 --> 00:19:00.400
So, you know, you get to this point where you just continue to go and you become detached because you've developed the skill to continue creating, and you just know that you're creating for you, and you know that like you're so aligned with with that deeper purpose that everything that comes out is meant to come out, and you'll be able to go back and and edit and click and drag and copy and paste and make it even that much better.
00:19:00.559 --> 00:19:22.400
But we all, you know, really have to just take that moment of not having to overanalyze it and just go because the more that you kind of just throw out, and it goes back to you know what we put out on social media, what because we become so focused on um the number and the comments and the engagement that it like it loses the fun and it loses your creative ability to just go there.
00:19:22.480 --> 00:19:26.400
But when you allow yourself to go and be free, that's like the most beautiful work.
00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:37.599
And whether you do it for yourself or for others, whatever it is, like there's something about getting to the point of really strengthening that muscle that you just in itself throughout that process become so detached because you're in it.
00:19:37.839 --> 00:19:45.359
Um, so I think you know, everything that you guys said was so beautiful in the storytelling around, and it's such a great reminder of just like we are creators, we are creators.
00:19:45.519 --> 00:19:52.960
Everything that we do as beings is creating something, and sometimes you're gonna create your best work, and sometimes you're gonna be creating your shittiest work.
00:19:53.119 --> 00:19:57.599
But you have to stay in that process of continuing to like stay on the path of it.
00:19:57.680 --> 00:19:58.960
So that was beautiful, everyone.
00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:09.519
I would just add to that as a coach, one of the most if we're setting goals, the most important part of setting any goal is to detach from the outcome of the goal because you actually don't have control over the outcome.
00:20:09.759 --> 00:20:10.240
That's hard.
00:20:10.319 --> 00:20:13.680
It's hard, it's hard, we struggle with it or a hard conversation.
00:20:13.839 --> 00:20:21.680
We we we won't have the hard conversation because we're afraid of how it's gonna go, and then we we don't ever do the thing or speak our voice.
00:20:21.839 --> 00:20:25.680
And if there's any perfectionists in the house, that's another whole hook.
00:20:25.759 --> 00:20:42.880
Because, first of all, perfect isn't real, and it's not relatable, and from this whole love yourself theme, it keeps validating this not enough story because it's not attainable, and so we keep trying to get it perfect, and then it just keeps shining the light on this wound of like I'm not enough.
00:20:43.200 --> 00:20:46.079
So it can be uh it can be its own prison in a sense.
00:20:46.160 --> 00:20:50.799
So you do have to detach from the outcome, which allows you to be in the process.
00:20:50.880 --> 00:20:56.079
And they like the saying is people think the pot of gold is at the end of the rainbow, but it's actually in the rainbow.
00:20:56.160 --> 00:20:56.799
It is the rainbow.
00:20:57.119 --> 00:20:58.000
Say that one more time, Donnie.
00:20:58.079 --> 00:20:59.119
That was a bottle.
00:20:59.680 --> 00:21:00.480
Where's that pot of gold?
00:21:00.720 --> 00:21:01.599
Where in the rainbow?
00:21:01.920 --> 00:21:02.720
It's in the rainbow.
00:21:02.880 --> 00:21:09.440
But I think I think too, it's like this back and forth that we all have this ping pong in our head.
00:21:09.519 --> 00:21:15.519
Like, if we were to put a microphone in our head, we're all having those same thoughts when we're putting something out there.
00:21:15.759 --> 00:21:17.359
We all have the ping pong thoughts.
00:21:17.440 --> 00:21:18.079
It's what you do.
00:21:18.240 --> 00:21:27.839
So those people that you see that you aspire to be, that you're just like, oh yeah, they just didn't listen to the the the loud sounds of like, don't do it, the shit is black.
00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:37.039
Like they still showed up, you know, and they still birthed whatever it is that it was the fact that something was once in our brain that is now out in the world is wild.
00:21:37.200 --> 00:21:45.279
It is the most fascinating thing that we can do as humans, so many, just like birthing kids, you know, but like there was a thought one time, and now it's out there.
00:21:45.359 --> 00:21:52.480
And the fact that we become so dependent on other people in the audience, it's so destructive.
00:21:52.640 --> 00:21:54.640
So it's the idea that it's like one, we all think that.
00:21:54.720 --> 00:21:56.559
We all have the same thoughts, but what are you gonna do with it?
00:21:56.640 --> 00:21:59.759
You're gonna you're gonna go into the fear of the faith because there's two ones.
00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:01.759
And there's two tunnels that you can go down.
00:22:01.839 --> 00:22:03.440
And I'll always go down by faith.
00:22:03.599 --> 00:22:06.000
Not to say that I don't have those same thoughts that everyone else.
00:22:06.079 --> 00:22:06.640
So yeah.
00:22:07.039 --> 00:22:12.480
Yeah, I'm curious, like what, because I think we're all like nodding our heads, like, yes, yes, yes.
00:22:12.640 --> 00:22:14.480
Like we get it, it's sinking in.
00:22:14.640 --> 00:22:24.400
But I'm curious if there's a moment or a story that you could share where like you had to, like, what did you do to lean into that faith?
00:22:24.559 --> 00:22:29.039
What were you when you were in a moment of like uninspired or not?
00:22:29.359 --> 00:22:30.000
You know what I mean?
00:22:30.160 --> 00:22:38.319
Like you're in a moment of like hitting a wall or hitting that creative block or nothing's just like feeling in alignment.
00:22:38.880 --> 00:22:44.559
Has there been a moment in your career in this life thus far where that has happened?
00:22:44.640 --> 00:22:52.799
And what did you do to kind of get yourself back in that alignment and see the you know wheels and creation start kicking into gear again?
00:22:53.359 --> 00:22:55.359
Any of you can answer this.
00:22:56.000 --> 00:23:00.720
Um, do you go on I pattern recognition is my shit.
00:23:00.880 --> 00:23:04.400
I fucking could spot a pattern with my eyes closed.
00:23:04.640 --> 00:23:10.400
And I felt like I can spot my own pattern sometimes with my eyes closed and open.
00:23:10.559 --> 00:23:15.440
And when I whenever I am feeling a creative blog, I also feel envy.
00:23:15.599 --> 00:23:18.480
I also feel like why is it working for everybody else and not me?
00:23:18.720 --> 00:23:20.720
Why is her shit taking off and not mine?
00:23:21.200 --> 00:23:28.799
I do all and I realize whenever I'm thinking those thoughts, whenever I'm feeling stuck, it's because I'm not actually taking action on anything.
00:23:29.359 --> 00:23:31.519
Like that is that is my pattern.
00:23:31.680 --> 00:23:39.759
And it sounds like it might be someone on the and so whenever I'm feeling a creative block, I just have to do something.
00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:52.799
I um a lot of my work is around self-abandonment, and a self-abandoning act is like perfectionism, people pleasing, a lot of codependency stuff, performance, overworking, overgiving.
00:23:52.960 --> 00:23:56.720
A lot of these things that where we orient ourselves around other people.
00:23:56.960 --> 00:24:03.039
And so when you look at life through that lens, you're constantly looking at what other people are doing and why it's not happening for you.
00:24:03.119 --> 00:24:14.000
But it puts you in like the passenger seat of your own life because you think that someone's gonna come and save you, and someone's gonna come and light your shit on fire and blow you up, and you're gonna be an overnight success.
00:24:14.480 --> 00:24:23.519
But like these overnight success people are the people that start a yap challenge and is like, I don't know why I blew up to seven million dollars uh launch.
00:24:23.680 --> 00:24:25.759
Well, because she just kept going.
00:24:26.319 --> 00:24:28.960
Like, you have to take the action to change your life.
00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:31.279
You have to take the action to get out of the rut.
00:24:31.440 --> 00:24:36.240
And so whenever I'm in a creative block, I'm like, okay, I want this.
00:24:36.400 --> 00:24:39.839
What do I need to do right now today to like get me out of that rut?
00:24:39.920 --> 00:24:41.440
Even if it's a small action.
00:24:41.920 --> 00:24:47.119
Recently I decluttered my closet because I'm like, I gotta move some stuck energy around.
00:24:47.680 --> 00:24:49.920
So yeah, that's so good.
00:24:50.240 --> 00:24:51.359
It's a cycle, right?
00:24:51.440 --> 00:25:09.119
Like, we to think that we're not gonna feel a rut, you know, it's not you don't have to like plan ahead for it, but it's so much a part of like the seasons of life of when we're in it, and um, you know, allowing that moment of stillness too, because as what we do, there's a lot of showing up.
00:25:09.200 --> 00:25:18.880
And you know, for someone who's in a line of work, that it's like really deep in community and with people, it's so easy to really become, you know, to have that ego on the pedestal.
00:25:18.960 --> 00:25:20.640
And I like I have two kids at home.
00:25:20.720 --> 00:25:25.359
Like, if there's nothing that grounds me more than two seconds, is like wiping shit off the side of whatever.
00:25:26.240 --> 00:25:28.079
Sorry, a lot of bleeps on my end.
00:25:28.400 --> 00:25:41.359
But I do think that like that home life and your practices like is so important because if you live in the state of just like validation, which is so real, um, you know, when you hit that rut, it's gonna hit you extra.
00:25:41.440 --> 00:25:50.640
Yeah, but there's something beautiful about the rut because it just allows you to just kind of like stay in this pause and and relook at everything, like, okay, what does need to change?
00:25:50.720 --> 00:25:53.599
Because that's usually the question that comes up during those cycles.
00:25:53.759 --> 00:25:58.720
And whether it's decluttering, which I love me a declutter moment, everyone that knows me knows that.
00:25:58.799 --> 00:26:06.720
Um, but also doing something different and shaking up the energy, whether that's like traveling or or whether if you don't have that opportunity, like going to take a different class.
00:26:06.799 --> 00:26:12.799
Like that is my for me when I have these classes and I'm like in either a playlist rut or I don't know what to say or what.
00:26:12.880 --> 00:26:16.400
I'm just like, I need to, I need to get out of town, I need to do something.
00:26:16.559 --> 00:26:19.359
Like, like my Midwest husband says, I need to get out of Dodge.
00:26:19.440 --> 00:26:30.480
I just I just learned what that meant at 10 years ago when we met, because we didn't say that in New York, but I need to get out of dodge and I need to like just shake up the fog, you know.
00:26:30.559 --> 00:26:37.200
Like what I tell my kids, it's like, you know, that snow globe, and you kind of just shake it up and it just you allow the dust to settle, and you're just like, what do I feel about it now?
00:26:37.279 --> 00:26:41.519
Because what's so important to you in one season is gonna be so different in a few months.
00:26:41.680 --> 00:26:42.960
Like Kaylin knows this.
00:26:43.119 --> 00:26:51.599
Shout out to Kaylin, who just is the most patient human of all times, but she knows whatever I like in one season, it is going to be very different in the next season, right?
00:26:51.680 --> 00:26:57.039
So like she has to adapt with them, like, oh, whatever she loves, I know she's not gonna like it three months later, right?
00:26:57.119 --> 00:27:00.079
And it's just this cycle of like, ooh, yeah, yeah.
00:27:00.799 --> 00:27:01.680
We're gonna do that again.
00:27:01.839 --> 00:27:03.279
Ooh, ooh, ooh, mm.
00:27:03.839 --> 00:27:11.200
And because I have these moments of like whether it is like me just putting myself in a different group of people, and that's what's so been beautiful about Powerhouse.
00:27:11.279 --> 00:27:22.640
It's like taking me out of the fitness and wellness world and it's like thrown me into mothers and women entrepreneurs that I got to connect with and have so much different conversations that stimulates my mind in a different way.
00:27:22.799 --> 00:27:31.519
Um, but I do think getting out of your routine is so important, and as an artist, like you have to experience life in a different lens.
00:27:31.599 --> 00:27:37.200
So I love that you brought up the creative act book because there's so many tools in that that we can all use to just like bring it back.
00:27:37.359 --> 00:27:37.839
Yeah.
00:27:38.160 --> 00:27:40.240
Yeah, nothing changes if nothing changes.
00:27:40.400 --> 00:27:46.720
And just piggybacking on both what both of you said, I think you said it earlier, no one's coming to rescue us or save us.
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:52.799
And that to me, even in my world of recovery back in the day, it was my life changed when I took ownership.
00:27:52.880 --> 00:27:55.519
I actually call it owner shit, own your shit.
00:27:55.759 --> 00:27:56.799
Like own it all.
00:27:56.960 --> 00:28:08.319
Like you can play the victim, and that doesn't mean you maybe weren't the victim of something, but to still be playing the victim a year later, 10 years later, 20 years later, if that's the case, you're all you're gonna always be seen through that lens.
00:28:08.480 --> 00:28:12.559
So it's like I love acronyms because I just need things dummy down sometimes.
00:28:12.640 --> 00:28:16.960
And act is one that I use for my clients, and action creates transformation.
00:28:17.119 --> 00:28:19.680
So it is all about the action that we take.
00:28:19.920 --> 00:28:22.319
The other thing I would add, it's it's the whole why.
00:28:22.400 --> 00:28:26.079
You know, the saying is when your why gets bigger than your how, the how will find a way.
00:28:26.160 --> 00:28:34.319
And so in those days when you're just not feeling it or kind of going through the motions or in a funk, you gotta get to the why, like the why underneath the why.
00:28:34.480 --> 00:28:38.640
You know, you gotta kind of ask yourself why five times, which you know, that process.
00:28:38.799 --> 00:28:47.839
And so you get to the root of it, and it has to like be in your soul and your bones, like underneath your bones and the tissues, like really to move you into action.
00:28:48.079 --> 00:28:51.279
Because yeah, I don't think um staying stuck.
00:28:51.359 --> 00:29:13.920
The name of my coaching business is called the shift, and that word just always resonated so deeply with me, and it's transformation of the mind, body, soul, and it's all about energy because energy can't be destroyed, but it can be shifted, and that's why I love yoga so much, and why we feel so good after we've moved our body because we are changing our state and and moving our body, and that's why we can walk out feeling so light and free.
00:29:14.720 --> 00:29:15.359
So good.
00:29:15.599 --> 00:29:30.880
Okay, so let's say you have one great idea, like it's dropped in, it is it is not just great, it is fucking fantastic, and it's really like in your bones, and you're feeling it, and it's something that you're like ready to create and put out there.
00:29:31.039 --> 00:29:38.720
How do you turn that one idea into an entire ecosystem of content without it feeling repetitive?
00:29:39.920 --> 00:29:55.279
I mean, I can start if I I think about my podcast that I had for um four and a half years called Comeback Stories, and it was an idea one of my coaching clients is an NFL football player named Darren Waller, and he's been public about his own recovery and sobriety.
00:29:55.359 --> 00:30:13.359
And um, I was his coach, and so and then we became really close friends, and then had this idea about starting a podcast called Comeback Stories, and really it's just kind of using the model of what recovery programs use and having people share what their life was like, what happened, what was the thing, and then what your what your life is like now.
00:30:13.440 --> 00:30:18.160
So, really sharing your experience, strength, and hope and what that turned into.
00:30:18.319 --> 00:30:32.720
I mean, it it certainly for me from a brand standpoint helped having somebody that you know does really good in fantasy football and has these crazy ass NFL followers who those aren't the kind of followers you you necessarily want for engagement, not that type of engagement.
00:30:33.039 --> 00:30:46.400
Yeah, but but what came of it as far as just like you know, doing events together, doing speaking events, doing retreats, and and how it benefited me just from that idea has been so so fruitful and changed my life forever.
00:30:46.559 --> 00:30:47.200
Yeah, yeah.
00:30:47.440 --> 00:30:47.839
So good.
00:30:48.079 --> 00:30:59.599
And we didn't even we did it over COVID for the first year and a half, um, all virtually, and then we the um our very first podcast we did at it was called Blue Wire Studios.
00:30:59.680 --> 00:31:09.920
It's a podcast studio inside the Wynn Hotel, and we'd never done an in-person podcast, and our first one was with Michael Phelps, and he doesn't do if you go and go look for him on podcasts, he does not do podcasts.
00:31:10.000 --> 00:31:14.000
And so the first one we ever do is with Michael Phelps in the Wynn Hotel in the lobby.
00:31:14.160 --> 00:31:20.880
The like people can look in and watch the watch the podcast, and and it was like it was the most amazing thing.
00:31:20.960 --> 00:31:26.640
I wasn't overwhelmed because the type of conversation that we were having and him sharing his current day struggles.
00:31:26.720 --> 00:31:30.240
And in that moment, it was like, this is exactly why I wanted to do this.
00:31:30.319 --> 00:31:43.759
You've got this, you know, this big six foot six, masculine of all masculine football players, the best Olympian, best athlete of all time, not talking about sports, talking about loving ourselves and mental health and all the struggles.
00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:47.440
And that was a moment for me, I was like, oh my gosh, this is so amazing.
00:31:47.519 --> 00:31:49.359
And this is exactly why we're doing it.
00:31:49.519 --> 00:31:55.119
It was to remind people that they're not alone, you know, and that we all have a comeback story in us.
00:31:55.359 --> 00:31:55.920
Yeah, yeah.
00:31:56.240 --> 00:31:56.880
So good.
00:31:59.039 --> 00:32:01.039
The question was building an ecosystem around an idea.
00:32:01.279 --> 00:32:02.160
Yes, one idea.
00:32:02.480 --> 00:32:03.759
So it doesn't feel repetitive.
00:32:04.000 --> 00:32:04.480
Oh, yeah.
00:32:04.960 --> 00:32:19.440
Um, I I think Rick Rubin may have said something along these lines of like you just create what's exciting to you, and then I'll and then you create something over here, and then you're like, I'm creating this, and I don't know how it makes sense, but it kind of makes sense, and then this and this, and all of a sudden you have like this whole business idea that all fits beautifully.
00:32:19.759 --> 00:32:36.319
I feel like there's there's truth in that for me, but what I realize in terms of creating an ecosystem, especially now on a more practical level, is that you can there are so many different modalities to explain your same concept, your same idea, your same creativity that people consume in different ways.
00:32:36.480 --> 00:32:44.880
And so what works well for me in on Instagram is reels and journal flipping pages, finger pointing, etc.
00:32:45.119 --> 00:32:51.680
But Substack, people that want to go like deep in the shit, I write like Substacks that go deeper on what I'm talking about here.
00:32:51.920 --> 00:33:00.400
It definitely is repetitive, but I think a lot of people think that the when you post something, every single follower saw the thing.
00:33:00.559 --> 00:33:04.720
Yeah, and so you're like, oh my god, I can't post that again because I just posted that last week.
00:33:04.799 --> 00:33:09.519
But like you just post it again because sometimes people don't see it or when they hear it in a different way.
00:33:09.680 --> 00:33:16.720
What I've noticed is that um I can tell that people learn differently by the way that my media comes out.
00:33:17.039 --> 00:33:21.839
I point literally to my journals and I talk, and that is what my reels are.
00:33:22.160 --> 00:33:24.559
But my subsacks are visually oriented.
00:33:24.640 --> 00:33:41.599
I create, like, I was talking about self-worth, and it was a scale on like just like a scale, and it had visuals of like what high self-worth is and what low self-worth is, and an explanation of why this image is helping you understand what it high self-worth acts are.
00:33:41.839 --> 00:33:47.839
And so people understand it completely differently and are like, oh my gosh, I've loved your content, but this spoke to me.
00:33:48.000 --> 00:33:50.480
And so it's really just packaging it up in a different way.
00:33:50.640 --> 00:34:06.720
It is definitely repetitive in terms of the DNA of it, but when you're repackaging it on and add the layer that not everyone is seeing every single thing that you post at all times, I think that that kind of distills this idea of what other people think of us on our social, and that is what feels repetitive.
00:34:06.880 --> 00:34:09.920
The idea that other people think your content feels repetitive.
00:34:10.559 --> 00:34:11.199
Yeah.
00:34:12.000 --> 00:34:23.199
While you guys were talking, I like have this image of this uh DJ who did this Olivia Dean remix that got really popular in the rhythm cycling world.
00:34:23.280 --> 00:34:39.199
We were all playing it in class, and this DJ on SoundCloud literally dropped his new remix, and he has about, I don't know, 50 plus videos of him just playing the same song with sometimes a different shirt and him just like vibing out to it.
00:34:39.360 --> 00:34:41.360
And then I watched all 49.
00:34:42.960 --> 00:34:45.119
Wait, missed one more, got to 50.
00:34:45.360 --> 00:34:48.880
Like wasn't it like Justin Bieber helped me out with this?
00:34:48.960 --> 00:34:56.239
Didn't he like when he promoted something, he posted like every day about like for the promotion of his swag album or something.
00:34:56.400 --> 00:34:58.719
I know something Justin Bieber related that you don't.
00:35:01.039 --> 00:35:03.039
She knows something like that.
00:35:03.119 --> 00:35:05.119
And if it wasn't Justin, it was someone else, right?
00:35:05.199 --> 00:35:07.360
But it's like they're posting it, right?
00:35:07.440 --> 00:35:09.199
Like over and over the same thing.
00:35:09.360 --> 00:35:13.280
And again, to the point that it's not landing on all the eyes that we think it is.
00:35:13.519 --> 00:35:16.320
But you think of back in the day marketing, right?
00:35:16.400 --> 00:35:20.480
When you would drive past the same, or even now, call Rafi Rafi, Rafi.
00:35:21.840 --> 00:35:28.719
We hear the same, the same jingle, we see the same photo, and we're still like, I feel like if I saw Rafi, I wouldn't know what's up.
00:35:28.800 --> 00:35:30.880
Like I'm not even.
00:35:32.400 --> 00:35:37.920
But it's the idea that it is just one photo, that one person's name and a phone number, and that's it.
00:35:38.079 --> 00:35:44.639
And we're trying to like literally re-script the thiki thaka on Reels to like make sure that it feels completely different.
00:35:44.800 --> 00:35:45.679
It's wild.
00:35:45.920 --> 00:35:48.079
It is wild that we overthink these things.
00:35:48.320 --> 00:35:55.039
And, you know, what's so beautiful about having a media team in any capacity is like we get to just do our thing right now.
00:35:55.119 --> 00:36:15.760
And we have a whole production team right now filming us, where like we can just cut this up in so many different ways, and it doesn't feel like, oh, there's there's so many parts of this conversation, but all is is editing here and maybe adding a little extra 10 seconds to the rest of all the beautiful storytelling that we've all been doing over and over because depending on when you're listening to it, it doesn't resonate.
00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:17.199
Oh, I heard this before.
00:36:17.519 --> 00:36:20.079
Oh, wait, that I really felt that.
00:36:20.239 --> 00:36:20.559
Why?
00:36:20.800 --> 00:36:23.360
Because life is changing, every hour is changing.
00:36:23.519 --> 00:36:26.079
So you're gonna hear things and they're gonna land so differently.
00:36:26.320 --> 00:36:33.920
And you know, for my friends in here who take class and know, like I have a lot of similar, my very similar messaging in my classes all the time.
00:36:34.079 --> 00:36:34.880
But it will hit.
00:36:34.960 --> 00:36:38.480
Someone who's taken my class for five years will tell me after class, like, that was a moment.
00:36:38.559 --> 00:36:40.400
I was like, bitch, I've been saying that for five years.
00:36:40.960 --> 00:36:42.159
This is the moment, right?
00:36:42.400 --> 00:36:42.960
But why?
00:36:43.280 --> 00:36:46.880
Because she's going through something right now where that just landed so differently for her.
00:36:46.960 --> 00:36:51.119
So it's that idea that we overthink things too much, and there's never enough.
00:36:51.199 --> 00:36:57.599
And everything that we do is beautiful and it's positive and it's transform, transformational, transformational, right?
00:36:57.760 --> 00:36:59.519
So it's like we're spreading good.
00:36:59.679 --> 00:37:02.960
There isn't a there's no such thing as capping the good.
00:37:03.039 --> 00:37:07.519
Like everything we do, let's like 10x that in such a different way because we need more of that in the world.
00:37:07.920 --> 00:37:08.159
Yes.
00:37:08.480 --> 00:37:09.199
That's so well said.
00:37:09.280 --> 00:37:22.559
With the one of my teachers talks about, you know, when you're you can say the same thing multiple times and then it finally lands, and that he's he talks about how if the the message, messenger, and timing collide, that's when transformation happens.
00:37:22.639 --> 00:37:28.880
And so a lot of times people are checked out, they might be there physically on their bike, right, or on their yoga map, but they're not there.
00:37:28.960 --> 00:37:33.119
They're time traveling and you know, worrying about whatever someone else is thinking about them.
00:37:33.199 --> 00:37:34.159
I talk about that in class.
00:37:34.239 --> 00:37:38.159
I'm like, nobody's thinking about you, everybody's just thinking about what everybody else is thinking about them.
00:37:38.400 --> 00:37:40.719
Yeah, so it's one big thinking party we're having.
00:37:41.119 --> 00:37:42.079
Yeah, for sure.
00:37:42.239 --> 00:37:43.519
That's so true.
00:37:43.760 --> 00:37:45.280
Um, and a good reminder.
00:37:45.519 --> 00:37:50.719
Uh I'm curious, we'll go to QA in just a moment, but I want to ask this to all of you too.
00:37:50.880 --> 00:37:55.199
How do you how do you measure whether your like content is working?
00:37:55.360 --> 00:37:57.360
Like what metrics are you looking at?
00:37:57.599 --> 00:37:58.800
And what are you not?
00:37:58.960 --> 00:38:05.280
Like, what are some metrics or measurements that you feel like are kind of overrated?
00:38:06.079 --> 00:38:10.800
Um this answer is kind of twofold.
00:38:10.960 --> 00:38:12.400
One is like the regular ones, right?
00:38:12.559 --> 00:38:14.800
Like you click on analytics and it tells you all the things.
00:38:15.039 --> 00:38:23.599
Um, but the thing what I've learned to just release is that like you can go viral at any point in time of anything that was the past.
00:38:24.239 --> 00:38:29.840
Like I the very first time that I did go viral with my work was two months after I'd already posted it.
00:38:30.639 --> 00:38:35.679
300, maybe 300 views on it, and then that video has done four million.
00:38:35.920 --> 00:38:36.000
Wow.
00:38:36.719 --> 00:38:38.400
Sold me$155,000.
00:38:38.800 --> 00:38:39.280
Yeah.
00:38:39.760 --> 00:38:40.639
Two months after.
00:38:40.800 --> 00:38:42.719
So like I'm like, you just keep doing.
00:38:43.039 --> 00:38:43.360
Yeah.
00:38:43.760 --> 00:38:46.000
You just keep doing because you literally never know.
00:38:46.159 --> 00:38:49.840
And I couldn't even tell you what was the thing that did the thing to have it do the thing.
00:38:50.000 --> 00:38:50.960
I have no idea.
00:38:51.199 --> 00:38:52.320
Maybe my energy.
00:38:52.400 --> 00:38:52.719
Yeah.
00:38:54.000 --> 00:38:54.800
Totally.
00:38:55.119 --> 00:38:55.679
Wow.
00:38:57.679 --> 00:39:07.039
I think the idea of truly creating impact is massive.
00:39:07.199 --> 00:39:07.360
Yeah.
00:39:07.599 --> 00:39:26.000
I think when I have received whether it is DMs, even whether it's one person plus or in person, and they're specifically telling me, and I see even like the saves on something that was like heart's work, not just like me moving in class, something that was just like, oh, that was my heart's work.
00:39:26.159 --> 00:39:32.400
Um, that to me felt like, okay, that one person who sent me a message and just said, like, thank you so much.
00:39:32.639 --> 00:39:44.880
Love, like, I could, I understood that, but the way you wrote it, usually carousels or what, is like, because that's like my time for me, where I can really just go further in a idea.
00:39:45.039 --> 00:39:47.760
Um, and I can explain like my feelings and thoughts on that.
00:39:48.000 --> 00:39:55.679
So for me, just knowing that like someone saved it, someone took the time to read it to the end, someone took the time to send me a message and said, Thank you.
00:39:55.840 --> 00:39:58.800
That to me is like, I don't even know the likes.
00:39:58.880 --> 00:40:01.440
I don't even care on that of how many bodies, but like that was amazing.
00:40:01.519 --> 00:40:04.079
That makes me feel like, okay, I'm I'm I'm doing the good work.
00:40:04.239 --> 00:40:04.719
For sure.
00:40:04.800 --> 00:40:06.639
Yeah, yeah, mine would be the same answer.
00:40:07.119 --> 00:40:13.760
Um, I feel like I don't really share my story or share what's going on in my life just to share my story.
00:40:13.840 --> 00:40:23.039
It's actually to get people to feel right, like to actually feel something or experience something or maybe see their story in something I'm sharing.
00:40:23.199 --> 00:40:27.760
In my experience, like the one thing that connects us all is pain and struggle, right?
00:40:27.840 --> 00:40:29.360
It's the essence of common humanity.
00:40:29.440 --> 00:40:31.840
Like, if you're a human being, you're gonna go through pain.
00:40:32.000 --> 00:40:38.639
And my pain might look different than your pain, but truly, we're, you know, we're all just trying to find freedom from that pain.
00:40:38.719 --> 00:40:43.360
And for many people, like myself, I used to hide like numb it out with drugs and alcohol.
00:40:43.519 --> 00:40:55.199
Others will hide in their work, others will close their hearts, others will crush it and get to the top to try to prove that they are enough to mom and dad, or dad might not even be alive anymore, but they're still trying to find that validation.
00:40:55.519 --> 00:41:00.000
And then others can actually transmute that pain into a greater purpose.
00:41:00.079 --> 00:41:10.639
And so it's just wild to think of like all of the shenanigans in my past addiction have become my greatest gift just by sharing it and reminding somebody else that they're not alone.
00:41:10.719 --> 00:41:18.000
All I have to do is share my story and be authentic in a platform that is really far from authentic these days.
00:41:18.320 --> 00:41:26.239
And so, because you know, you probably know this, maybe you all do, but like authenticity vibrates at a higher frequency than any other frequency out there.
00:41:26.320 --> 00:41:27.519
It's even higher than love.
00:41:27.840 --> 00:41:31.760
I believe it's higher than love because it it is love, it's like radical self-love.
00:41:33.360 --> 00:41:43.119
I I feel like the the common theme here is that like in order to get to the place of authenticity, you have to be authentic to yourself.
00:41:43.199 --> 00:41:53.199
And if you can show up online in that way, I think that that is completely resonant, and that is you'll see there's like reciprocity in that for whatever reason things take off.
00:41:53.599 --> 00:42:01.280
Um one of the things that I've noticed too, especially if I'm posting about something that is in relation to that someone may not want to necessarily admit.
00:42:01.440 --> 00:42:04.639
So I posted something about like building your Rico case on your friend.
00:42:04.719 --> 00:42:08.000
Like, we've all done this where you're like, you didn't text me back, you didn't call me back.
00:42:08.159 --> 00:42:17.840
And so now when you text me, I'm gonna take longer to respond for no other reason than I've been keeping a tally and I haven't been telling you about it.
00:42:18.079 --> 00:42:33.760
And so people didn't want to comment my like CTA to get the Substack, but the save, no, there were no comments, but the saves were like, and the shares were because not everybody wants to be seen resonating with something like that.
00:42:33.920 --> 00:42:34.079
Yeah.
00:42:34.239 --> 00:42:44.559
And I think if you're worried about the outside validation of what that post looked like on the front end, crickets on the likes, crickets on the comments, you're like, maybe I won't run that again.
00:42:44.960 --> 00:42:50.320
But because I know that like it's hitting a chord with somebody because it was hitting a chord with me, let's be real.
00:42:50.480 --> 00:42:53.599
All my stuff that I post about is everything that I work through.
00:42:53.840 --> 00:43:03.599
Um it keeps you creating and going, and you start to see what I've noticed with those, like after like 10 or 15 comments, then people stop caring what other people think.
00:43:03.760 --> 00:43:08.000
Like there's enough people in the room to feel more confident to be like, okay, send me the Substack link.
00:43:08.159 --> 00:43:08.880
You know what I mean?
00:43:09.039 --> 00:43:14.159
Or people will like DM, can you send me this link instead of like commenting it publicly, you know?
00:43:14.400 --> 00:43:23.599
But um that's just some food for thought on the like validation metric or or the idea that we're thinking other people are looking and what do they think about the post that I just posted.
00:43:23.920 --> 00:43:27.840
Especially when you're putting yourself out there, like really my work is my own mirror.
00:43:27.920 --> 00:43:33.440
And so if I'm talking to you about building a recoil case on my friend, chances are I had been working through building a recoil case on my friend, right?
00:43:33.599 --> 00:43:39.599
And so just being able to be open and vulnerable with that um speaks to your point about sharing your story.
00:43:39.760 --> 00:43:53.920
Sometimes your story is like the big version of your story, and other times the story is like the times that you self-abandon, and it's like a micro story, but it's still the same authenticity that's required, in my opinion, for what you desire.
00:43:54.079 --> 00:43:59.840
And then when you're more authentic and then you realize I don't even care about this anymore, but it's just becomes a way that you're experiencing life so beautifully.
00:44:00.079 --> 00:44:00.639
It just comes.
00:44:01.119 --> 00:44:02.559
It's like the embodiment of it.
00:44:02.719 --> 00:44:03.039
Yeah.
00:44:03.679 --> 00:44:11.119
I think what's so beautiful about just what we do in so many ways is we trust, right?
00:44:11.280 --> 00:44:29.360
And I think that's a word that we all need to remind ourselves over and over is like when you trust, not just the process, but like what you're doing and putting out and you believing you, that is it, you'll know, you'll know when it's starting to resonate with others, but it has that belief has to start with you, right?
00:44:29.440 --> 00:44:39.519
So too often we get so attached to that idea of like the likes and the shares, and no one's buying X, Y, and Z, and nobody commented from my many chats of all of this thing.
00:44:39.679 --> 00:44:47.840
And we forget that like if you continue to do, right, what is it's it's passion, it's love, and it's consistency.
00:44:48.079 --> 00:44:53.440
But too often we bow out before that that snowball even starts to get bigger.
00:44:53.599 --> 00:45:02.320
So it's like the, you know, I've I've seen so much change since shout out to Kaylin Creatives because consistency on social media was really hard for me.
00:45:02.400 --> 00:45:04.079
You know, I had two babies at home.
00:45:04.239 --> 00:45:14.800
So it wasn't till me being, you know, they were out at school, they were in preschool, and you know, I'm working on this reel, I'm trying to match the clap with the dot and the tiki tiki dot.
00:45:15.039 --> 00:45:18.559
And I was like, no, I gotta, I need another song, let me move this for hours.
00:45:20.880 --> 00:45:23.440
And I was like, oh my god, I have to go pick them up now.
00:45:23.920 --> 00:45:27.920
So you're telling me that I just spent from 9 to 2:30 p.m.
00:45:28.400 --> 00:45:29.599
editing a reel?
00:45:30.079 --> 00:45:30.880
Oh my god.
00:45:33.920 --> 00:45:35.599
Somebody somebody save me.
00:45:37.360 --> 00:45:37.599
Right?
00:45:37.760 --> 00:45:43.519
So, what are things that like where we can just stay within our vision and our zone of genius and in our flow?
00:45:43.679 --> 00:45:46.880
And what are things that if you can just like outsource and help?
00:45:47.039 --> 00:45:48.800
Like, I don't need to be the minutiae.
00:45:48.880 --> 00:45:50.480
I do not need to edit a clip, right?
00:45:50.559 --> 00:45:52.960
Was I doing it forever for a long time?
00:45:53.360 --> 00:45:59.119
But could that consistency was because I mean, I didn't sleep for four years, you know.
00:45:59.280 --> 00:46:03.280
So for me to even have this like creative juice, this like, oh, I still got it.
00:46:03.360 --> 00:46:04.800
No, bitch, you ain't got it, you need sleep.
00:46:04.880 --> 00:46:06.000
That's what you need, right?
00:46:06.480 --> 00:46:07.360
But I want to stay.
00:46:07.440 --> 00:46:10.159
I want to, I want this machine to keep going.
00:46:10.719 --> 00:46:14.480
And I had to admit that, like, okay, where is my time?
00:46:14.639 --> 00:46:20.159
My time is in being, my time is in creating, my time is in writing things out and like creating these experiences.
00:46:20.320 --> 00:46:22.000
My time should not be in editing.
00:46:22.320 --> 00:46:29.519
So when I started working with my social media girly, it's like really what changed everything because it kept things consistent, you know?
00:46:29.679 --> 00:46:46.079
Um, and that consistency is really where you know opportunities started coming up and and and doors started opening in the sense that like I could I could be me and you can still see me, but no, I'm not the one that's editing the clap with the boom and the thicky that, right?
00:46:46.239 --> 00:46:54.880
So um, but I will say I just want everyone to know, just like, you know, trusting that process because if you are doing your work and you're putting it out there, you continue to keep doing that.
00:46:54.960 --> 00:47:03.760
Like that's not supposed to take off in a month or two months, and it may take three years or four years, but like if you truly still believe in it, it will happen.
00:47:03.840 --> 00:47:04.239
That's it.
00:47:04.320 --> 00:47:07.440
That is the recipe of success is consistency with love and passion.
00:47:07.519 --> 00:47:08.159
So yeah.
00:47:08.639 --> 00:47:09.119
So good.
00:47:09.360 --> 00:47:13.199
Okay, I want to talk about platforms really quick before we get the mic.
00:47:13.280 --> 00:47:15.679
And um so get your questions ready.
00:47:15.840 --> 00:47:17.840
I promise this will be the last one I asked you guys.
00:47:18.000 --> 00:47:26.639
But I'm curious like what platforms you're really invested in, like why you make the decision to post certain things on certain platforms.
00:47:26.880 --> 00:47:36.159
And if there's anything that you're kind of seeing on the near horizon that excites you or that you're opening up, like Substack is one where I'm like, good God, I keep hearing about Substack.
00:47:36.400 --> 00:47:38.800
I'm not like I know I need to explore it a little bit.
00:47:39.039 --> 00:47:42.559
Um, so yeah, share a little bit of that about your platforms that you're using.
00:47:43.119 --> 00:47:46.960
Um I in the beginning I used to really love TikTok.
00:47:47.119 --> 00:47:52.000
Uh TikTok was when my stuff started to blow up, and I but I just well, no.
00:47:52.800 --> 00:47:53.920
Everything is a mirror.
00:47:54.800 --> 00:48:03.519
With virality comes mirrors, meaning somebody's gonna shine something directly at you that is highlighting your deepest wound.
00:48:03.760 --> 00:48:05.599
You may not realize it at the time.
00:48:05.760 --> 00:48:13.599
Um, but the more exploration on whatever that frustration is, it will and so I would be like, ah, TikTok is just like people are so mean on TikTok.
00:48:13.760 --> 00:48:17.599
Um and so I felt like I stopped investing much into TikTok.
00:48:18.400 --> 00:48:24.079
The the realization in that is that people were highlighting um that I'm not a therapist.
00:48:24.320 --> 00:48:25.199
I never claim to be.
00:48:25.360 --> 00:48:29.119
None of my work is therapy, therapy adjacent, but therapy is important.
00:48:31.599 --> 00:48:42.320
And um, but I realized is that that mirror of people being mad at my credential or lack thereof was me not actually being secure and that my lived experience is actually enough.
00:48:42.639 --> 00:48:45.760
Um so know that whenever you get on a platform and you have haters.
00:48:45.920 --> 00:48:49.760
Um and once I worked through that, isn't anybody in my comments really anymore?
00:48:49.920 --> 00:48:53.199
Let me knock on wood because I open my phone.
00:48:53.360 --> 00:48:56.239
Um, but I moved to Instagram and Instagram was doing really well.
00:48:56.320 --> 00:49:05.039
But what I realized from a business standpoint, because money, we want to make sense of money, and I'm in my money journal era, so let's talk about the brass tacks of it.
00:49:05.360 --> 00:49:06.320
I love Substack.
00:49:06.559 --> 00:49:09.280
I love Substack for the pe the potential of numbers.
00:49:09.440 --> 00:49:16.320
If I sell a journal at$25 physical or$20 digital, um the hard cost for my physical is around$6.
00:49:17.760 --> 00:49:26.639
If I have a Substack subscription for$5, if I have you in my ethos for a year, I make more money on that than I would on a physical journal for you just buying at a one-time fee.
00:49:26.960 --> 00:49:34.559
The beautiful thing about a Substack is that it takes me um drastically less time to get my shit off on Substack.
00:49:35.280 --> 00:49:41.280
And the money to be made on Substack is actually mind-blowing.
00:49:41.519 --> 00:50:00.159
When a friend broke down to me, she manages someone else's social in a therapy adjacent space, um, astrology adjacent, maybe not therapy adjacent, but she the gal in the first six months of starting her Substack was making$130,000 on SubStack.
00:50:00.639 --> 00:50:01.039
Oh my god.
00:50:01.360 --> 00:50:10.239
And so I'm like, if this is an easy thing for me, I know the recipe is just being consistent and being authentic and not getting caught up.
00:50:10.320 --> 00:50:15.199
I was caught up in the idea of, well, this channel is gonna take away from my journals.
00:50:15.440 --> 00:50:20.079
Why would anyone buy a Substack or subscribe to my Substack if they have my journals?
00:50:20.159 --> 00:50:21.840
I'm just undercutting my own product.
00:50:22.239 --> 00:50:23.199
But that's not actually it.
00:50:23.360 --> 00:50:26.719
People want to go deeper on building a Rico case on your friend.
00:50:26.800 --> 00:50:34.559
I have a friendship journal that walks you through self-abandonment and friendship, but like never in the journal am I talking about what a recoil case looks like in friendship.
00:50:34.639 --> 00:50:38.239
It's really just highlighting a different avenue for more people to meet my work.
00:50:38.320 --> 00:50:54.000
And when we're thinking about it from a monetary standpoint, because money is important, um seeing the numbers laid out like that, it takes me a substantially less, it costs me less to get that person in my Substack, and it takes me less time to make the money longer in Substack.
00:50:54.400 --> 00:50:57.039
Um so I'm very excited about Substack.
00:50:57.199 --> 00:51:02.000
I've been on for maybe three months, and I have like 800 subscribers on Substack.
00:51:02.159 --> 00:51:07.119
So like people are on there and they want to read and they want to engage and they want to be like in your ethos.
00:51:07.599 --> 00:51:12.159
And I just have my VA also post my reels on Substack and I use the Manny Chat CTA.
00:51:12.239 --> 00:51:17.280
Many chat is not connected to Substack, but my VA is in there sending them the link when they comment X, Y, and Z.
00:51:17.440 --> 00:51:22.639
Like I'm just playing on Substack because the possibilities are really endless on there financially.
00:51:22.960 --> 00:51:23.440
That's cool.
00:51:23.599 --> 00:51:26.800
Subscribe to my Substack that's launching tomorrow.
00:51:28.559 --> 00:51:29.119
That's my favorite.
00:51:30.559 --> 00:51:31.679
Substack is your favorite too.
00:51:31.840 --> 00:51:32.320
Well, it is now.
00:51:32.400 --> 00:51:32.559
Yeah.
00:51:32.800 --> 00:51:39.599
It's gonna be is there anything else you guys want to add on platforms before we open it up to?
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:41.280
You got the mic, Aubrey?
00:51:41.440 --> 00:51:41.840
Okay, cool.
00:51:41.920 --> 00:51:42.320
We're ready.
00:51:42.400 --> 00:51:42.559
Yeah.
00:51:42.719 --> 00:51:43.039
You good?
00:51:43.280 --> 00:51:44.239
Okay, let's do it.
00:51:44.559 --> 00:51:45.280
Question?
00:51:45.519 --> 00:51:46.320
Can you explain?
00:51:46.559 --> 00:51:47.760
And we got a microphone for you.
00:51:48.079 --> 00:51:50.719
Can you explain what is building a Rico case?
00:51:50.960 --> 00:51:54.639
Um, have you heard of the federal, like federally Rico R-I-C-O?
00:51:54.880 --> 00:51:56.800
It's like what this is my legal background.
00:51:56.880 --> 00:51:59.920
I told you I've lived a lot of lives, went to law school, didn't practice law.
00:52:00.079 --> 00:52:07.119
Um a Rico case is basically a form of the feds trying to get all the gang members in trouble.
00:52:07.360 --> 00:52:12.239
And so you have to have like a line item of things to check off to build a Rico.
00:52:12.639 --> 00:52:15.920
So it's like you're making you're building the Rico case by checking off all these boxes.
00:52:16.000 --> 00:52:18.880
Once all the boxes are collected, all of you motherfuckers are going to jail.
00:52:19.119 --> 00:52:30.880
So it's just an analogy to say I'm building a case against why I shouldn't be friends with this person when really I just wasn't sharing something vulnerable that hurt my feelings, and that's all I had to do to then have a more intimate relationship with a friend.
00:52:31.280 --> 00:52:31.440
Yeah.
00:52:31.679 --> 00:52:32.000
Thank you.
00:52:32.159 --> 00:52:36.800
I love how specific you always are on how you create the results.
00:52:37.039 --> 00:52:42.239
Like when I attended your how to write a best-selling book, yes, it was just like so jam-packed.
00:52:42.320 --> 00:52:44.960
I'm like, could I just play you on replay?
00:52:45.119 --> 00:52:45.199
Yeah.
00:52:46.239 --> 00:52:55.199
The reason why I'm I'm great at pattern recognition, but I felt like for so long, this is also a self-abandoning coping mechanism that you will probably spot when I say it.
00:52:55.599 --> 00:52:59.440
Um, in order to not feel, I intellectualize.
00:52:59.679 --> 00:53:05.119
And so a lot of my journey has been like, why isn't this working for me?
00:53:05.280 --> 00:53:06.719
Why is everyone else getting rich?
00:53:06.880 --> 00:53:08.880
Why is everyone else being able to do all these things?
00:53:09.039 --> 00:53:10.400
Why is everyone else's business working?
00:53:10.559 --> 00:53:12.000
Why is everyone why why whatever?
00:53:12.159 --> 00:53:13.360
Insert whatever.
00:53:13.679 --> 00:53:19.840
And in order for me to understand that, I would go down rabbit holes on like what the thing is.
00:53:19.920 --> 00:53:24.239
So like when people are like, manifest it, you just have to become it, and then you are it, and then you're rich.
00:53:25.360 --> 00:53:28.400
And then all these girls are just becoming it and then they are it and then they're rich.
00:53:28.480 --> 00:53:33.920
And I'm like, weird because I tried to become it on Tuesday and I am not it, and it's not working.
00:53:34.400 --> 00:53:34.719
Real.
00:53:34.960 --> 00:53:42.960
And so I go down these rabbit holes to which are really invitations for me, let's be real, of like, why doesn't this work?
00:53:43.119 --> 00:53:52.320
But what it is, what that phrase is, is that if you take enough reps being consistent about something, and you take enough reps, you build the confidence.
00:53:52.480 --> 00:53:55.920
When you build the confidence, you feel like you deserve that thing.
00:53:56.159 --> 00:54:00.000
Truly in your heart of heart, because the reps build the confidence.
00:54:00.079 --> 00:54:06.639
They build the like, I do deserve this because my shit is good, because I've been taking reps, and then the thing comes to you.
00:54:06.800 --> 00:54:09.360
That's like, if you want it, just believe it, and then it is.
00:54:09.440 --> 00:54:14.320
But that's what I'm telling you right now, are the practical steps of what that looks like tomorrow to get the shit.
00:54:14.800 --> 00:54:26.320
I it's uh was a negative coping mechanism that I've alchemized or I'm working on continuously alchemizing into something that works for me and that also works for my people that I sell my stuff to.
00:54:26.480 --> 00:54:33.519
Like, and I think it might be an ADHD trait because I'm like, I'm the shit in the ADHD community, I had no idea, but they're like, this is how my brain works.
00:54:33.599 --> 00:54:36.800
You help me understand emotions and actions and change practically.
00:54:37.039 --> 00:54:40.159
Like, what do I do right now to stop self-abandoning?
00:54:40.239 --> 00:54:44.239
And people will be like, just become it and do it, and then you will never do it again, right?
00:54:44.400 --> 00:54:47.280
Like, it's just it's just how I need information.
00:54:47.599 --> 00:54:48.960
You can do any sharp tickets.
00:54:49.679 --> 00:54:50.159
Yeah.
00:54:50.800 --> 00:54:53.039
I like to shoot people between the eyes with the info.
00:54:53.280 --> 00:54:53.519
Yeah.
00:54:53.920 --> 00:54:59.679
I would just add to yours too, if like someone's in the audience sitting here saying, Where do I start with that?
00:54:59.920 --> 00:55:03.760
To me, the most self-confident people are the ones that keep the promises they make to themselves.
00:55:04.320 --> 00:55:11.199
So if you say it's like from the four agreements of being impeccable with your word, like that's bigger than just doing the things you say you're gonna do for other people.
00:55:11.360 --> 00:55:17.599
It's like when you say you're gonna do the thing, go to the gym, go to yoga, post the thing, and you don't, you break that promise.
00:55:17.760 --> 00:55:32.320
That's where the mind becomes such fertile ground to the chatter, which I call the saboteur or that self-sabotage voice that's usually rooted in some version of a not enough, you know, the imposter syndrome thing, which is really just the fear of not being enough.
00:55:32.559 --> 00:55:36.880
Um, but I go back to saying like the only story that matters is the one we tell ourselves.
00:55:36.960 --> 00:55:41.360
So if you're saying you're not enough, it doesn't matter how much you achieve, receive, acquire.
00:55:41.440 --> 00:55:46.639
I know a lot of people in this town with a lot of money that are miserable because they have that not enough story.
00:55:46.800 --> 00:56:00.960
So I I would say just appropriate chunk size goals, small enough to feel attainable, big enough to feel worthwhile, not too big, because if you set too big of a goal and then you don't achieve it, then the voice is gonna come up and say, See, you said you were gonna do the thing and you didn't do it.
00:56:01.119 --> 00:56:03.679
So appropriate chunk size is a great way to start.
00:56:03.760 --> 00:56:09.920
And then it's like compound interest, and you just stack days on top of it, and then you become unshakeable.
00:56:10.159 --> 00:56:15.679
We're a lot more aware of when that little fucker starts chapping up a little too much.
00:56:16.000 --> 00:56:16.559
I'm gonna add to that.
00:56:16.880 --> 00:56:18.079
I gotta put one F-bomb in.
00:56:18.559 --> 00:56:20.960
Yeah, you gotta I mean I made up for the whole panel.
00:56:21.119 --> 00:56:21.679
Don't you worry.
00:56:23.039 --> 00:56:24.400
Got another one coming.
00:56:25.039 --> 00:56:30.880
But it's um it's it's making realistic goals in the beginning for anything.
00:56:30.960 --> 00:56:35.440
You know, I love when I have conversations with people and they're like, I'm gonna start working out seven days a week.
00:56:36.079 --> 00:56:37.519
Patty, right?
00:56:37.760 --> 00:56:39.920
She's not here, but something vibrated in her body.
00:56:40.079 --> 00:56:41.039
She knows I'm talking about her.
00:56:41.119 --> 00:56:44.239
And I'm like, girl, you know you're not going to the gym seven days.
00:56:44.480 --> 00:56:45.760
Like, what is that, right?
00:56:45.920 --> 00:56:50.079
Making something's realistic that's like in flow, at least in the beginning, right?
00:56:50.159 --> 00:56:52.400
To like again build that muscle.
00:56:52.639 --> 00:56:56.320
And too often we like look, we think of the vision, right?
00:56:56.400 --> 00:56:59.519
Because we all have this massive vision of what we want to do.
00:56:59.679 --> 00:57:05.519
And then we're just like, we just kind of like shut down because it feels so heavy.
00:57:05.679 --> 00:57:14.800
We kind of just like it's heavy on our chest because we're thinking about all those steps to take there, and we forget that it's just like, okay, what is that one step that I can stay consistent with?
00:57:14.960 --> 00:57:20.239
That it's just like everything is small, is acts of repetition over and over.
00:57:20.480 --> 00:57:26.880
And you know, a lot of us just become paralyzed because we're just going for the big thing and we're forgetting that there's like these back steps to do.
00:57:27.039 --> 00:57:29.920
So for everything, yeah, I love I love what everyone's saying.
00:57:30.239 --> 00:57:31.039
Is there a perfectionist?
00:57:31.280 --> 00:57:32.079
Are there perfectionists?
00:57:32.239 --> 00:57:41.119
Anyone that's like willing to admit about being okay, because I think you guys might need to hear this, what they're saying, a little bit differently, only because this is an example of that.
00:57:41.440 --> 00:57:45.599
They are speaking fucking factual truth, but I don't hear it that way.
00:57:45.920 --> 00:57:54.880
So, as a perfectionist, you move the bar to the promise, yeah, and you don't realize that that is a broken promise to you.
00:57:55.119 --> 00:58:04.719
So if you're like, I'm going to type one paragraph of my book today, and then you type the one paragraph, and you're like, oh, I just gotta do the second paragraph.
00:58:05.119 --> 00:58:07.519
And then you type the second paragraph and you're like, oh, it's just not good.
00:58:07.599 --> 00:58:08.239
And you know what?
00:58:08.400 --> 00:58:12.159
I'm not even gonna eat because I'm not really that hungry, but I'm in flow right now.
00:58:12.880 --> 00:58:18.639
Yeah, you've typed three paragraphs of the book, but you've already broken the promise to yourself.
00:58:18.719 --> 00:58:20.880
You already didn't do the thing you said you were gonna do.
00:58:20.960 --> 00:58:28.880
So even though you achieved the thing and even more than it, it is still self-abandonment, it's still a broken promise, and it doesn't build the confidence that they're talking about right now.
00:58:29.679 --> 00:58:36.719
So just so the perfectionists know because I break promises, I work on not breaking promises, but I I do it often.
00:58:37.119 --> 00:58:38.079
So well said.
00:58:38.480 --> 00:58:39.920
I find that so interesting.
00:58:40.079 --> 00:58:42.400
I would be like, I'm in flow, I'm going.
00:58:42.559 --> 00:58:45.440
I'm when are we gonna catch this wave again?
00:58:45.679 --> 00:58:53.920
I like I feel like I would like ride the wave and just like stay in it and just be like, okay, but then but also as women, it's so different for us, right?
00:58:54.079 --> 00:59:01.599
Because then you have your weeks where you're like going, and then you have Ludio phase where you're like back to back to that one paragraph.
00:59:01.760 --> 00:59:09.119
Yes, you know, so I think that there's also something to say about where we are and what we're doing and what like allowing that to be a baseline.
00:59:09.280 --> 00:59:12.000
Yeah, but no, you have me, you got me questionable.
00:59:12.400 --> 00:59:16.960
Well, the tell is this the tell is not necessarily how much you can achieve.
00:59:17.039 --> 00:59:18.480
Sometimes you are actually in flow.
00:59:18.639 --> 00:59:21.599
The tell is how you're treating yourself while you're doing the thing.
00:59:21.840 --> 00:59:23.360
Did I skip lunch?
00:59:23.599 --> 00:59:24.800
Am I holding my pee?
00:59:26.239 --> 00:59:27.360
No, it's for real.
00:59:27.679 --> 00:59:27.840
Okay.
00:59:28.000 --> 00:59:28.880
Am I holding my pee?
00:59:29.360 --> 00:59:30.719
That all of that shit is self-abandonment.
00:59:30.960 --> 00:59:34.400
Doesn't matter how much flow you're in, you're still breaking the promise to yourself actually.
00:59:34.559 --> 00:59:38.480
And sometimes we get so much in flow that we forget that we have not even rest at all.
00:59:38.639 --> 00:59:52.320
But because that is an operative state and high achievers stay in that state, and because compound interest interest is just a universal law, no matter how fucked up your aura is, you're going to get something, and that is an illusion that the thing is working, but that's not how it works.
00:59:52.559 --> 00:59:53.119
Does that make sense?
00:59:53.199 --> 00:59:53.599
That's the time.
00:59:54.000 --> 00:59:54.559
I'm gonna sit on that.
00:59:54.639 --> 00:59:55.360
I'm gonna call you tomorrow.
00:59:57.039 --> 00:59:58.000
Let that one marinate.
00:59:58.079 --> 00:59:58.800
I'm gonna let that marinate.
00:59:58.880 --> 00:59:59.760
I'm gonna let that marinate.
00:59:59.840 --> 00:59:59.920
Yeah.
01:00:00.639 --> 01:00:00.880
100%.
01:00:01.280 --> 01:00:01.440
Yeah.
01:00:02.320 --> 01:00:03.039
Yes, yes.
01:00:03.199 --> 01:00:10.960
Like if you're it's it's really just a fundamental need: food, safety, shelter, drinking, going to the bathroom.
01:00:11.039 --> 01:00:14.559
Like if you are denying yourself of those basic fundamentals, you are abandoning yourself.
01:00:14.800 --> 01:00:16.880
Okay, what if I peed, took a snack, and came back?
01:00:17.280 --> 01:00:17.440
Yeah.
01:00:17.679 --> 01:00:18.480
I'm good, right?
01:00:18.639 --> 01:00:19.599
I'm not self-right?
01:00:20.239 --> 01:00:21.440
Both can be true, really.
01:00:21.679 --> 01:00:22.400
Both can be true.
01:00:22.480 --> 01:00:23.119
There's balance.
01:00:23.199 --> 01:00:28.000
It's not really as black and white, but I like to pull those specific things because those are like tangible things that we can know.
01:00:28.079 --> 01:00:32.480
Like, yeah, I have to hold my pee all the time and like not eat because I am in such a flow.
01:00:32.639 --> 01:00:33.440
Both things can be true.
01:00:33.519 --> 01:00:37.920
You can also have taken a break and had lunch and went to the bathroom and came back and still hit that same flow.
01:00:38.559 --> 01:00:42.880
So I talk about self-sabotage sabotage of the common scenarios, and that is one of them.
01:00:42.960 --> 01:00:45.280
And it's when something else seems more important.
01:00:45.360 --> 01:00:47.519
Uh maybe you when you're not eating.
01:00:47.599 --> 01:00:48.320
That's what you're saying.
01:00:48.880 --> 01:00:51.679
That and then desire and acceptance is another big one.
01:00:51.760 --> 01:00:53.440
Um, and then the third one I talk about.
01:00:53.679 --> 01:00:54.880
Oh, um, I've been good lately.
01:00:54.960 --> 01:00:56.079
I deserve a little extra.
01:00:56.239 --> 01:01:01.840
So from a self-sabotage or self-sap self-abandonment, and then of course putting everybody else's needs before.
01:01:02.320 --> 01:01:02.800
That's my flavor.
01:01:02.880 --> 01:01:03.519
I've been good lately.
01:01:03.599 --> 01:01:05.760
I can get a little strange every day.
01:01:06.960 --> 01:01:07.199
Okay.
01:01:08.719 --> 01:01:09.440
Oh my gosh.
01:01:09.519 --> 01:01:11.440
Okay, we have time for one more question.
01:01:11.760 --> 01:01:12.079
Yada.
01:01:12.719 --> 01:01:16.400
Okay, so I am a perfectionist and I'm also a visionary.
01:01:16.559 --> 01:01:25.039
So Brooke here keeps me on track because I'm like, in my mind, I know how I want this video to look, but I just spent eight hours trying to make it look like that, and it still doesn't.
01:01:25.280 --> 01:01:39.119
The thing that I also struggle with that goes to my question is I, again, the visionary, so I know what I want it to look like, and then I see someone else who's doing it, and I compare my day one to their like year 10.
01:01:39.599 --> 01:01:41.760
So what are you consuming, right?
01:01:41.840 --> 01:01:44.000
Like we've talked a lot about like what you put out.
01:01:44.320 --> 01:01:48.000
What are you taking in that like keeps you creating?
01:01:48.159 --> 01:01:55.519
Because sometimes I'm like, I want this to look like this, and I'm like, then I see it, I'm like, yeah, that's it.
01:01:55.599 --> 01:01:57.599
And then I do it, I'm like, nah, that ain't it.
01:01:58.079 --> 01:01:58.400
Right?
01:01:58.559 --> 01:02:01.760
So like then I'm like, um, maybe I need to, right?
01:02:01.840 --> 01:02:09.440
And I I wouldn't necessarily say it's like compare, it's like comparison to what I have in mind that I want what I'm doing to actually look like.
01:02:09.679 --> 01:02:11.119
So what are you taking in?
01:02:11.280 --> 01:02:16.960
Because I'm trying to like monitor now what I take in more than what I put out.
01:02:17.280 --> 01:02:18.719
And I'm a doom scroller.
01:02:18.800 --> 01:02:20.159
I can't pretend like I'm not.
01:02:20.400 --> 01:02:22.480
I love the I love Instagram.
01:02:22.880 --> 01:02:24.880
I and I don't do it on LinkedIn.
01:02:25.039 --> 01:02:28.000
So I post on LinkedIn like crazy and I do well.
01:02:28.159 --> 01:02:28.880
I do really well.
01:02:28.960 --> 01:02:30.880
I post what I think, I'm great at it.
01:02:31.199 --> 01:02:33.119
Instagram, ooh, Instagram.
01:02:33.360 --> 01:02:33.840
It hits.
01:02:34.079 --> 01:02:35.440
Instagram does something different.
01:02:35.599 --> 01:02:37.360
So, like, specifically on Instagram.
01:02:37.760 --> 01:02:42.400
Let me ask you, what does your explore page, what is your, is it called an explore page?
01:02:42.480 --> 01:02:44.559
What is what is the algorithm feeding you?
01:02:44.800 --> 01:02:45.280
You know what?
01:02:45.360 --> 01:02:46.800
I don't look at my explore page.
01:02:46.960 --> 01:02:47.199
Okay.
01:02:47.440 --> 01:02:49.440
So when you're scrolling, like what comes through?
01:02:49.599 --> 01:02:56.079
What it depends because you know you click one thing and now everything is that one thing.
01:02:56.960 --> 01:02:58.159
So I hate that.
01:02:59.599 --> 01:03:01.280
Being a Doom scroller, right?
01:03:01.360 --> 01:03:10.480
That's real for so many of us, but having really tight boundaries on how much you're consuming will kill you as a creative.
01:03:10.639 --> 01:03:12.239
Like, I truly believe that.
01:03:12.400 --> 01:03:19.119
Um, I am 140 days sober of not going past one hour on Instagram, right?
01:03:19.360 --> 01:03:23.119
Like, um that's the best way I could say it, sober, you know.
01:03:23.199 --> 01:03:26.320
I don't know if that's right, but um, so there's this app.
01:03:26.480 --> 01:03:27.840
I should get paid for this.
01:03:28.000 --> 01:03:30.639
There's this app called Be Present, okay?
01:03:31.039 --> 01:03:35.440
And you get to set how many times you log in and how long you can be on.
01:03:35.599 --> 01:03:38.239
So I have mine set to four times a day.
01:03:38.480 --> 01:03:42.800
And every time I log in, it starts the timer and it goes for 15 minutes, right?
01:03:42.960 --> 01:03:53.440
I've always been someone that like really, I'm very protective of what I consume, very protective on the people and the company that I keep myself surrounded with, the conversations that I'm having, always.
01:03:53.599 --> 01:03:58.320
If I feel any ounce of uh, we're we're keeping it, you're gonna stay on a tier two, right?
01:03:58.400 --> 01:03:59.360
You're not coming to the wedding.
01:03:59.440 --> 01:04:00.239
We're staying there.
01:04:00.480 --> 01:04:07.360
So for me personally, what I'm bringing in, I'm making sure people I'm unfollowed, they're muted.
01:04:07.519 --> 01:04:11.199
What I'm seeing has to give me this jolt of inspiration.
01:04:11.360 --> 01:04:14.400
It has to bring me joy, it has to bring me education.
01:04:14.559 --> 01:04:17.039
It's value in one of those, right?
01:04:17.280 --> 01:04:18.800
I don't follow my cousins.
01:04:18.960 --> 01:04:22.079
I don't follow, like my my sister's muted.
01:04:22.159 --> 01:04:23.119
You know, that's not true.
01:04:23.199 --> 01:04:23.760
That's not true.
01:04:24.719 --> 01:04:25.679
Cut that out.
01:04:28.000 --> 01:04:33.039
But listen, if she had the sister, one of the sisters, right?
01:04:33.440 --> 01:04:39.440
But I say that to say, right, when I have those 15 minutes, one, I'm making sure I'm not around my kids, so I'm not doing this and this.
01:04:39.519 --> 01:04:57.280
So when I know I'm logging on and I have that 15 minutes, like I'm going, whether it is to create or whether it's just to like give myself a moment, because there is, I love Pinterest, you know, I love, I love scrolling through Instagram too, but I also have it where anything that's being fed to me are things that give me some kind of value in some way.
01:04:57.440 --> 01:04:58.719
And joy is a part of that too.
01:04:58.800 --> 01:05:02.159
You know, it doesn't all have to be, you know, something super educational.
01:05:02.239 --> 01:05:04.320
I think that there's so much value in joy.
01:05:04.559 --> 01:05:18.880
Um, but really having those boundaries, it it that whole comparing day one to someone else's like day, day 30, the fact that that's even a part of your language, the fact that like doom scrolling, it's like that's shit you gotta like get tight.
01:05:19.039 --> 01:05:26.800
Um, so that be present app I've been on for 140 days, and it'll tell you where you are on the leaderboard or what, and you can adjust it how you want.
01:05:26.960 --> 01:05:30.320
I started with three logins, just 10 minutes each, right?
01:05:30.400 --> 01:05:32.639
It was so aggressive, one of those unrealistic goals.
01:05:32.719 --> 01:05:35.360
And I was like, this felt it felt too restricted.
01:05:35.519 --> 01:05:41.760
But I found my flow, I kept adjusting throughout, and I found my flow with four logins, 15 minutes.
01:05:41.920 --> 01:05:44.079
I don't even reach the full hour a day.
01:05:44.239 --> 01:05:54.960
Like sometimes I go on and I'm just like, all right, you know, and the timer's still going, but I am so intentional about when I log in because there's a timer on.
01:05:55.119 --> 01:05:58.000
So having those are so, so helpful.
01:05:58.159 --> 01:05:59.440
Um, and yeah, I love.
01:06:00.159 --> 01:06:02.320
If I'm in a Doom Scroll, I love Doom Scrolling on Pinterest.
01:06:02.559 --> 01:06:05.599
I love that because that just kind of like takes out the noise.
01:06:05.840 --> 01:06:09.440
Yeah, and you mentioning like not following people that you know.
01:06:09.599 --> 01:06:12.079
I love Instagram because it's everybody that I know.
01:06:12.159 --> 01:06:12.400
Yeah.
01:06:12.559 --> 01:06:14.800
So like TikTok I hate because I'm like, I don't know these people.
01:06:14.960 --> 01:06:15.360
Yeah, same thing.
01:06:15.519 --> 01:06:17.599
Like, so I go on TikTok, I'm like, no.
01:06:17.840 --> 01:06:19.039
Like I if I go on it.
01:06:19.199 --> 01:06:22.159
But Instagram, I'm like, what is my auntie doing now?
01:06:22.480 --> 01:06:23.679
What is my cousin doing now?
01:06:24.079 --> 01:06:28.719
So give yourself a little login once a week, sit on the couch and just see what's the family doing.
01:06:28.960 --> 01:06:31.760
But you don't need to know what the family's doing every single day.
01:06:31.920 --> 01:06:32.079
You know?
01:06:32.639 --> 01:06:32.800
Yeah.
01:06:32.960 --> 01:06:33.360
I like that.
01:06:33.679 --> 01:06:36.719
I I would love to chime in on that too.
01:06:37.039 --> 01:06:46.320
So um if you would accept by I'm mostly saying that for projector energy, if there's anyone with human design in here, you understand.
01:06:46.800 --> 01:06:48.880
Um yeah, you get it.
01:06:49.119 --> 01:06:50.960
I just initiated my own invitation.
01:06:51.039 --> 01:06:52.639
It may not land, but it's fine.
01:06:53.519 --> 01:07:00.639
Um so you had mentioned that on LinkedIn you just you're just in flow, you just do and you let your ship pops off in LinkedIn.
01:07:00.800 --> 01:07:10.480
And the on Instagram, it's easier to compare your like day one to someone else's day 10, and how do we get out from under that, I don't know, thumb of like feeling like you're being held down.
01:07:10.960 --> 01:07:16.880
I had, I'm gonna tell you a little quick story of how I got around that, and you could see if you can see any of yourself and me.
01:07:17.199 --> 01:07:24.719
Um, there was a gal that was using a phrase that I use in my company that now is used everywhere, like that fucking butterfly season song.
01:07:24.800 --> 01:07:26.480
And I'm like, great, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.
01:07:27.760 --> 01:07:29.679
Um, she was saying cocoon season.
01:07:29.840 --> 01:07:40.480
And we like run in the same circle, and I have it trademarked, and I'm like, okay, I have I should probably say something because this person has a much bigger platform than I do, and it's something that I'm trying to protect from my own IP that I've created.
01:07:40.800 --> 01:07:45.360
Took me a while to be able to build confidence to do that, but I did send the message, I'm like, hey, I have this, blah, blah, blah.
01:07:45.519 --> 01:07:50.719
I'm not saying don't talk about your work in your way, I'm just saying like this in this way that you're saying it is whatever.
01:07:50.880 --> 01:07:56.559
Um, and her response to me, I didn't really realize was a mirror at the time, but she said, Oh, thanks for flagging.
01:07:56.639 --> 01:07:59.679
Like, I um I've never even seen your stuff.
01:07:59.760 --> 01:08:03.039
Like, I actually don't look at anyone's stuff in this space.
01:08:03.280 --> 01:08:05.440
And I was like, don't believe it.
01:08:06.960 --> 01:08:17.520
And in my own work and creating the format in which I create, like on Instagram or TikTok, it'll say, People that are creating like you, like, there's nobody that is creating like me.
01:08:18.319 --> 01:08:27.199
And I only came to that by also being like, okay, what do I just do that's authentic to me, the way you show up on LinkedIn?
01:08:27.760 --> 01:08:34.960
And so my year 10 is really my like month six, but it's because I'm just showing up with what's authentic to me.
01:08:35.199 --> 01:08:41.600
And because of that, I I don't even look at anyone in my space because there's no one doing it like me.
01:08:42.079 --> 01:08:45.920
And so there's someone else that can look at me and as inspo, in fact, they do.
01:08:46.000 --> 01:08:48.800
I have people reach out to me all the time to be like, Can you help me write a guided journal?
01:08:48.880 --> 01:08:50.000
And I'm like, sure, I can.
01:08:50.159 --> 01:08:51.760
That's I can do that.
01:08:52.079 --> 01:08:58.239
But the I heard it in the way you phrase LinkedIn and why LinkedIn is working for you because you just are you.
01:08:58.399 --> 01:09:05.600
But when you're on Instagram, you're looking at maybe competitors or other people in the space and you're wanting it to be like that and it's not hitting.
01:09:05.920 --> 01:09:10.479
I would go so far as to say that maybe not be authentic you the way you're trying to create.
01:09:10.720 --> 01:09:17.840
And so one way to get around it, because like I love a Doom Scroll, I love to watch people, I don't know, uh Doom Scrolling.
01:09:18.079 --> 01:09:22.880
Like, I will watch people searching for coins in the beach and I'm into it.
01:09:23.439 --> 01:09:27.119
Um but I say that you use anyone else on those TikTok lives.
01:09:27.359 --> 01:09:29.119
It sounds like there's some people that do it.
01:09:29.840 --> 01:09:33.279
I'm like, should I give them money for like anyways?
01:09:33.520 --> 01:09:45.680
Um I would I would invite you to just don't look at anyone in your in your industry and try to feel the feeling that you feel when you're on LinkedIn and try to create that feeling on Instagram.
01:09:45.840 --> 01:09:51.520
And I think that that would be the recipe for your stuff to start to pop off the way it is on LinkedIn.
01:09:51.680 --> 01:09:58.159
The difference in what you said is one is being more authentic and you don't care, and you don't even doom scroll on there, and it's working, you know what I mean?
01:09:58.239 --> 01:10:03.760
And so now I can wholeheartedly say I literally don't look at anyone in my industry, I don't have to.
01:10:05.119 --> 01:10:05.279
Yeah.
01:10:06.479 --> 01:10:12.000
I would just also add from the comparison theme that our brains are hardwired to compare.
01:10:12.239 --> 01:10:16.960
And so just knowing that we can choose to compare in an empowering way.
01:10:17.119 --> 01:10:22.319
And to me, I would always early on in recovery with people be talking, I'd be like, I want what they have.
01:10:22.479 --> 01:10:29.840
And I'm not talking about the material things, I'm talking about that inner confidence, the inner peace, whatever the energy they're bringing.
01:10:29.920 --> 01:10:32.560
Um, or you can compare in a disempowering way.
01:10:32.640 --> 01:10:35.760
So it's understanding that okay, our brains are hardwired to do it.
01:10:35.840 --> 01:10:43.039
How can I come compare in an empowering way that's gonna lift me up and inspire me and not um make me feel like shit?
01:10:43.680 --> 01:10:43.840
Yeah.
01:10:44.079 --> 01:10:47.039
There was this girl, um, her name is Shoshana Raven.
01:10:47.199 --> 01:10:53.520
Lindsay introduced me to her actually, and she talks about like um slaying your shame.
01:10:54.000 --> 01:11:08.000
And she put this whole carousel together about how she was uninvited from this event, of all these high-performing women, and how she was really sad about it, but how she realized that everything that she thought she wanted in this room, she actually had in real life, but she just wasn't aware of it.
01:11:08.159 --> 01:11:11.279
And this fucked up experience helped her see that.
01:11:11.600 --> 01:11:23.119
And that post literally moved me to tears, and it made me so excited about my own life that I created something that ended up going viral, but because of the excitement that I pulled from that post.
01:11:23.279 --> 01:11:23.920
Does that make sense?
01:11:24.079 --> 01:11:24.239
Yeah.
01:11:24.399 --> 01:11:35.600
So, like, just to give you a tangible of what that may look like in practice from an viewing it from an empowered lens versus a disempowered lens, sometimes we don't realize that it's disempowering because you're not actually saying, I want to disempower myself today.
01:11:35.840 --> 01:11:36.479
You know what I mean?
01:11:36.640 --> 01:11:37.760
Anyway, so good.
01:11:38.319 --> 01:11:42.960
I'm gonna go and leave this conversation that has been so incredible.
01:11:43.039 --> 01:11:43.680
Thank you all.
01:11:43.920 --> 01:11:49.359
With one last question, but before we do that, can you share how people can stay in touch with you?
01:11:49.520 --> 01:11:54.720
And if there's anything coming up that you want to share and kind of talk about to with our community.
01:11:55.119 --> 01:11:56.560
P, let's go first.
01:11:57.119 --> 01:12:01.359
Um, okay, so where you can you can find me.
01:12:01.520 --> 01:12:05.920
Um, Instagram is the platform that I use the most, kind of same same.
01:12:06.159 --> 01:12:08.159
Tickety Talk, you can find me there too.
01:12:08.319 --> 01:12:11.279
I'm pretty detached, but there's a lot of videos there.
01:12:11.439 --> 01:12:14.560
Um, I teach at uh the studio called NYX NYX.
01:12:14.640 --> 01:12:17.279
We have two locations, one in McCormick Ranch and Old Town.
01:12:17.359 --> 01:12:19.359
So I'm there every Friday, 6 a.m.
01:12:19.520 --> 01:12:20.239
and 9 a.m.
01:12:20.479 --> 01:12:21.760
when I'm in town.
01:12:21.920 --> 01:12:23.520
Um, come take class.
01:12:23.840 --> 01:12:25.840
We have a beautiful community.
01:12:26.000 --> 01:12:28.560
Um, I do in-person events as well.
01:12:28.720 --> 01:12:32.319
So uh yeah, Instagram stay connected and come through anytime.
01:12:32.560 --> 01:12:33.199
It's not good.
01:12:33.359 --> 01:12:33.600
Donnie.
01:12:34.000 --> 01:12:38.720
Um mine is also Instagram is probably the best place to track down what I'm doing.
01:12:38.800 --> 01:12:42.479
That's my name, Donnie D-O-N-N-Y underscore starkins.
01:12:42.800 --> 01:12:44.159
My website is my name.
01:12:44.319 --> 01:12:49.600
Um I teach locally at a couple different studios, Black Swan Yoga and Lume in North Scottsdale.
01:12:49.920 --> 01:12:53.119
And um my coaching program is called The Shift.
01:12:53.279 --> 01:12:57.119
And also I have a retreat coming up in Sedona called Release and Rise.
01:12:57.199 --> 01:13:00.720
It's a full moon retreat, September 25th through the 27th.
01:13:00.800 --> 01:13:02.720
So it's a Friday to a Sunday.
01:13:03.039 --> 01:13:03.920
Can I just say something?
01:13:04.079 --> 01:13:05.760
Because Don, I don't think you guys understand.
01:13:05.840 --> 01:13:11.600
If you haven't experienced Donnie, he's incredible, my hands-down favorite yoga coach.
01:13:11.680 --> 01:13:12.479
He's my number one.
01:13:12.720 --> 01:13:15.119
And his retreat and his experiences are incredible.
01:13:15.199 --> 01:13:16.479
He's such a gem of a human.
01:13:16.560 --> 01:13:22.800
You guys just saw like 1% of who he is, both both of them, because these are both really good friends of mine.
01:13:22.880 --> 01:13:24.800
Um, and I've been able to see them in so many different lights.
01:13:24.880 --> 01:13:27.039
But if you have not experienced a Donnie class, please go.
01:13:27.279 --> 01:13:31.760
I'm pretty sure I was like taking your class religiously when I started the Goodbye Media.
01:13:31.920 --> 01:13:35.439
Like all my clarity and creativity came.
01:13:35.600 --> 01:13:37.039
I got a lot through your classes.
01:13:37.199 --> 01:13:37.840
So thank you.
01:13:38.319 --> 01:13:40.880
I immediately was gonna deflect and start to compliment you all.
01:13:41.039 --> 01:13:41.680
But I'll say thank you.
01:13:41.760 --> 01:13:42.239
I received that.
01:13:43.439 --> 01:13:46.880
That's what I tell my people to do, and we can only take our people as far as where we want to go.
01:13:46.960 --> 01:13:48.000
Yeah, we gotta practice it.
01:13:48.560 --> 01:13:53.039
But for you, I moved away and was in San Diego for four years, and this hadn't come to life.
01:13:53.119 --> 01:14:00.640
And just to see all of you crushing it and stepping into something and being so bold to create this space, um, it's quite amazing.
01:14:00.720 --> 01:14:04.560
There's a lot I can learn from y'all, especially when it comes to content and social media.
01:14:04.640 --> 01:14:12.479
I think that's where my game still lacks a little bit, and I lean on word of mouth and just kind of the natural flow, but I gotta get some strategies and stuff like that.
01:14:14.720 --> 01:14:15.840
We're excited you're back.
01:14:16.000 --> 01:14:16.800
We're excited you're back.
01:14:17.119 --> 01:14:17.920
Yeah, for sure.
01:14:18.159 --> 01:14:18.880
Okay, Aisha.
01:14:19.199 --> 01:14:26.880
Um you can find me on TikTok or Instagram um or Substack, it's Butterfly Season, ITS, and then season is F C N.
01:14:27.439 --> 01:14:39.199
Um I'm coming out with a money journal, but I don't choose the launch, it just kind of chooses me, which is really just me choosing whether or not I accept all the invitation that is which I'm working towards.
01:14:39.680 --> 01:14:56.560
Um if if any of the self-abandonment, perfectionism, people pleasing, numbing, withdrawal, over control, if any of that stuff resonates with you, um I have this diagnostic that I think is so great and will help you see yourself in a way that gives you action.
01:14:56.640 --> 01:15:01.920
And so if you're interested in that, you can just comment on any of my posts pattern and you'll get it.
01:15:02.079 --> 01:15:04.159
And you can use the promo code lovable.
01:15:04.560 --> 01:15:05.920
Um let's cut that part out.
01:15:06.479 --> 01:15:09.760
You guys can use the promo code lovable and it'll be for free.
01:15:10.640 --> 01:15:11.039
Amazing.
01:15:11.199 --> 01:15:12.159
Thank you, Aisha.
01:15:12.800 --> 01:15:14.239
All right, last question.
01:15:14.560 --> 01:15:16.319
Uh finish the sentence.
01:15:16.479 --> 01:15:19.119
Your brand doesn't need more content.
01:15:19.439 --> 01:15:20.319
It needs.
01:15:27.920 --> 01:15:28.960
Yeah, I feel it.
01:15:29.279 --> 01:15:30.960
More you with a capital Y.
01:15:32.880 --> 01:15:34.640
More you with a capital Y.
01:15:38.479 --> 01:15:39.279
Authentically.
01:15:42.319 --> 01:15:44.880
I mean, you're sitting in the middle of the month for the one.
01:15:45.039 --> 01:15:46.880
You're sitting in the middle of two projectors.