WEBVTT
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This is uplift aging.
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A podcast that's more than a podcast.
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This is a challenge to embrace growing older, to confront negative stereotypes, and better understand what may come with aging.
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I'm your host, Amanda Weed and Fellowship.
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Together, let's uplift aging.
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I am thrilled to bring you our first on location episode of Uplift Aging.
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I sat down with the insightful Mark Lenhard in Boston during the Leading Age annual meeting.
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Mark is someone many of us admire in the field.
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He's a longtime leader in aging services and now serves as president and CEO of United Methodist Communities in New Jersey.
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This is part one of a two-part conversation with Mark.
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This is just the first part of my conversation with Mark.
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We broke this.
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We've broken this up into two episodes.
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In this one we talk a little about his in this one we talk a little bit about his experience and perspective on aging, the message at the heart of his work.
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We touch on his TEDx talk and we tease it a little bit.
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The link is below for you all.
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And we discuss the role that community and connection play in helping all of us age well.
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Part two will take us a little deeper into his recent TEDx talk, his experience on that stage, and afterward, the power of storytelling and his hope for the future of aging.
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This first half, though, is a thoughtful, inspiring conversation that invites all of us to rethink what it means to age successfully.
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So let's get started.
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We're here.
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I want to start with your TEDx talk.
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If you can give us kind of a little look inside how it happened, like how did this come to fruition, and then um walk us through, I guess, a little bit of that day.
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Sure.
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Yeah.
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Uh it was an interesting start.
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As I know many of us do, we get called to talk to different people about aging services and so on and so forth.
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And what I found was I was being asked about people that are age ed, older.
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And so um, but that's really not what the journey's been.
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It's really been more about aging.
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So I'm like, well, do we need to be talking about being old or do we need to be talking about what aging is?
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And how do we need to become more educated about aging successfully?
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It's only a slightly different perspective.
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In fact, I think many of the people that we get to work with, and I grew up working with, um, they know that.
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But I don't know that everybody does.
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And so um, we were talking with a local school, because we were going to be starting a youth board for the purpose of just bringing in new perspectives, people that wouldn't otherwise not be able to be on a board, that didn't have work experience, but we were missing innovative practices.
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And one of them said, Um, huh, I haven't really thought about being old.
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I'm like, well, what about aging?
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What did what does next year look like?
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What does next 10 years look like?
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I haven't really given it much thought.
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They had some great ideas.
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So that was really the start of it was when is the right time to start start talking about aging?
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We're always aging.
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So I actually opened my TED talk with a pop quiz.
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And the question is, how many of you are aging?
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And it was intro what you think was gonna be an easy question, but many pe there were people that didn't answer.
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And so it was just the thought, just that little shift of what does it mean to be aging well and successfully, which is different for everyone.
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So that's kind of how it started.
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And the talk is called Reenvisioning Aging Successfully.
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When I first read it, I was like, you could have stopped at reenvisioning aging, but tell me about the addition of successfully.
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I love that.
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So well, that was there was some intentionality with that because a lot of the conversations that I had been having recently were about um uh being winning at aging was was quantity, that the length of time.
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But there have been a lot of experiences, again, I know that we've all had of people who've not lived to past a hundred or whatever, but have had incredible lives.
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And so and were very successful in it.
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So if it's whether it's eighty or eighty-five or ninety or a hundred and five, um, did they look and say, I've lived abundantly, I've lived well, I this has been a successful time for me.
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My time may be different than yours.
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Um and so it was important to bring that in as something that continued also to be aspirational.
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And so again, the the talk kind of goes a little bit more into that, but it's about being purpose-driven and that purposes change.
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And so that it's what we are isn't necessarily who we become, and the opportunities just do things differently throughout our lives.
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Tell us a little bit more about um the others who were at this event, the other um speakers at this event, and the overall was it about being human, right?
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Like this was the concept.
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So, yeah, walk us through that a little bit.
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Well, so um how do we as human beings, how are we looking at things?
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We're uh obviously aging was important, technology, artificial intelligence.
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We had two um uh speakers on artificial intelligence.
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Uh, we had talked about uh death and dying.
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In fact, there was a comedian who her seeing her mother in the dying process with Alzheimer's, brought in a comedian to be by her side to continue to give her laughter every day.
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And she's like, I know that sounded really irreverent, but I really mean, but mom was happy.
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And so, and she's and she was a kind of a uh comedian throughout her years, and so she's like, I started this so that others could experience that kind of joy and the the euphoria that comes from laughter, and it was just a simple thing.
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I'm like, oh my gosh, that's so profound.
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So it was finding uh different people that talked about different aspects of even in the most technological part, AI, how is being human really important to that?
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And we were struggling with that today in the industry.
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Yes, we can make things better with AI, but we're never gonna take the human touch away.
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And so, how do those things combine?
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So that was really the idea was to approach it from a number of different angles.
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And so uh mine was kind of the aging and also social side of it, and um uh you know, I I spin a yarn, and so is the idea of the examples of the people that I've encountered throughout my career and how those lives define successful agents.
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So, can I ask, what does being human mean to you if you had to distill it?
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Um I I think it relationship.
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I think relationship.
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And I've said this before about leading age, and certainly in leading age, Texas, the breadth of my career and what I've been called to do has been only enhanced by the people that I've encountered to meet.
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Many of you have my career is because of the people that watch this and who came before.
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And so um I um it's relationship.
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And I find that the more that people are connected with one another, even in the smallest amounts, that really lends to that sense of connectivity, success, living abundantly.
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It's just it's um and it's snowballs.
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I love that is so true.
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And uh and I've seen that, you know, having had the opportunity to work with you when you were in Texas, yeah.
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Um, board member of ours on the executive committee.
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All I mean, you you I feel like you are um sort of a convener of people, but you also are someone who um seems to at least thrive off of being around others and being around others who are maybe a few steps ahead of where you want to be and and the latter as well.
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Tell us a little bit about um where you are now.
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You're no longer in in Texas.
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We miss you dearly at Leading Age, Texas, but love that Leading Age, New Jersey, Delaware um gets to have you as a member.
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Tell us a little bit about what brought you into saying yes to that big move.
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I mean, that is a heck of a cross-country move, and um and what led to that, and then how you kind of thread um what we were just talking about of that uh connection and relationship um into what you're doing now and where you are.
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Uh it was a big leap.
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Um, and it was hard.
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Uh, but I knew that to continue to do what I do well, I had to be challenged by something.
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And I think I had having I was really shaped by the people that were there.
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I go back and I think about at a time when in Texas when almost all the communities were all, I mean, the all the CEOs were reverenced something or other, right?
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I mean, really it was.
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And and I worked for several of them and um and grew up with a number of the people that are now the leaders of those organizations and have been shaped by them.
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And and so uh the what I've been able to accomplish um and even opportunities, things where I've been able to skip or or circumnavigate problems because others have gone through it.
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And I think that's where it is, is that the the continued comfortable nature of the the leaders throughout Texas, yourself, George, the association, to bring people together to even just not necessarily assault, but say, hey, here are the shared issues that we have.
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Um, because we've we've talked about Medicaid and we've talked about staffing, and we've talked these are these are things that are never going to go away, but to understand different perspectives and how to work for it at the time.
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So uh that was difficult.
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But I also wanted to continue to grow in that.
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And so uh this opportunity came up.
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Now I will say the fact that my wife was born in New Jersey probably helped with that a little bit.
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Um, and we have family up this way, and so uh this has been for our time of life to be able to connect with family members again and to expand on that with cousins and such.
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And so um it's been a very personally enriching time, which um I think has helped me look at things in a new way.
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So as we're starting to experience people who are older uh in our own families, uh it's caused me to look at things a little bit differently, even from I'm 54.
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Now I was thinking when I joined Leading Age, I was 22.
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Oh my goodness.
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So it's been a few years.
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Uh and so um baby.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Without a doubt.
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I know, I know.
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Still a child inside, but I'm gonna never gonna let that go.
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But so with that, I don't think you leave the relationships behind.
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So I'm you know, I've still been in touch with George, I've been still in touch with others, I've been talking with people.
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Um, I think of like um, it's okay to mention like Rodney Reuter and Pat Crump and Nicole Game.
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I mean, I I don't want to I don't want to miss anybody, but that's just part of who I am.
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I think about those things.
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And there were wonderful things we were doing in Texas, but there are wonderful things in New Jersey and Delaware.
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Um, and uh I saw you there really.
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Actually, my first meeting, or my first annual meeting really with New Jersey, and that was great.
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Um, so it was just about saying, what did I learn and then how could I uh take an organization?
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And it was no dissimilar than something in Texas.
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It was a 118-year organization that had been doing great stuff, that had been punched in the gut because of COVID and needed to reinvent itself and create, you know, some steam go in a new direction.
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And um I think the most kind of cathartic part was to be in a new environment where I wasn't as comfortable.
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That actually surprisingly became a wonderful skill set.
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So, because I knew Texas and I knew nowhere to go, and I knew the communities and I knew the people there, and um, but I didn't hear.
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I mean, I had to re-kind of recreate who I was in relationship, and that caused me to um really rely upon my team.
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I've built an incredible team, and for the first time broadly in my career, I'm able to just say, hey, you know, you go and make that happen.
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I'm gonna get out of the way.
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Um, and then we make these decisions together on how we can grow.
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And so we've been able to to really focus on more innovative things than just retreading the old formulas.
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Um so it's uh to be, well, I guess I was 52 at the time, to be 52 and start in a whole new area where I didn't know anybody, and I had to get to know the community and the new uh regulatory environment and four seasons that weren't just hot, hot, hot, hot.
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Naturally.
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10 minutes of wet and then hot.
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It's oh yeah, no, it's been that's that is lovely.
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I will say it.
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And like I'm 40 minutes from the beach and I'm 40 minutes from the mountains, and that's all, you know, 50 minutes from the from the city.
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So anyway, it's been um it's been wonderful to take those ideas and and refresh them, and it has to be new.
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You can't just transplant them.
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Um like it has to be organic within that new situation and the new people that you're with and the history.
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I mean, it was a hundred and 118 years now, yeah.
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Yeah, and contractually speaking, though, I do get to say y'all.
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I did make sure that was in my contract.
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I get to say y'all.
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Good.
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Um, and actually think that was my first word to the to the leading age association because we I did an award, I think, three days later, to one of my teammates in front of Leading Age New Jersey and Delaware, and I said, Well, hey, y'all, and it was just quiet.
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Oh my god.
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But anyway, but you being authentic in your in yourself, right?
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Yeah, you can't, you can't.
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No, that's so great.
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I think what we do at Leading Age Texas and Leading Age National and all the state affiliates is so focused on leadership in aging services.
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And I think what you just expressed is something that I mean I'm taking as as a as a lesson.
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So thank you for sharing that because I feel like we can oftentimes get so um you talked about the comfortability.
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I feel like we can get so comfortable in in where we are, and and at the same time, like we are, you know, making a difference, we are making an impact, we are fulfilling missions, and we're and we're working with the residents, and and it's and it's great work for you to be doing all of that and to sort of answer this call and and making this huge move, um, and what you've learned about yourself and how it sounded to me like you um you really not that you hadn't anyway, but really put family first.
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Like this was this was a as was a a sort of like statement you were making to yourself, the team that you've built, and being able to say, like, hey, you guys got this.
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Um, I'm gonna step aside and let you do your thing.
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I feel like that is something that is hard to do in a situation where you've been for years, or even, you know, I know you served in several different communities in Texas, but um even in that same kind of I guess family of communities, kind of stepping outside of that and being able to recreate boundaries for yourself and leadership.
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Um, what would you say to the people in our leadership collective or people who are coming up in aging services to cheer them on a little bit as they're as they're walking through those decisions or needing to make those kind of kind of moves maybe?
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First, I would say family is important.
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I mean, I my my parents died early on, so my my kids always had 400 to 700 grandparents, right?
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I mean, the boys learn to dance with the residents.
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Yeah.
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My daughter, you know, she would serve at Easter, you know, lunch or breakfast or brunch or whatever.
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And and so for us to be successful in what we do, you have to have that engagement.
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And I I know that I I don't do anything well without the support of my wife who's kind of supported me through all this to do what I need to do.
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Um for many of you who know her, is very tolerant, but anyway, um, so that is important, and you have to do it because if you if if you aren't in the right place, you you know it.
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And that's not about even at that time.
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I mean, I think all those places were the right place for me as I felt called to do the different places I needed to be, and then you grow through them out of them, or whatever the case is.
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Um, but for for emerging leaders, I think probably the thing that I struggled with the most was there was a time when I had mentors, I looked at them like, you need to do this, you need to know everything, you know, no weakness, no fear, so on and so forth.
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And I really felt like there was a period of time in which I missed out.
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If I had felt more comfortable say, I don't know, if I had felt more comfortable at an earlier time saying, I need to get to know this person, they are doing it well.
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Maybe I don't have to reinvent the wheel.
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Because there are incredibly innovative ideas out there, but you don't always have to be the one to recreate it, right?
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And so that's why I keep going back to networking.
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If we the associations do this, but it's a it's a two-way street.
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I think sometimes people forget that.
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The leading uh leading age, Texas New York, whoever it is, even national, they can't do it to you.
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It's a medium by which it occurs.
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You have to put whatever you want to get out of it, you gotta put into it.
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And that means you can't grinch about policy, you need to be part of the policy committee.
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You can't want to say, you know, everyone should feel more welcomed, but not serve on the welcome committee for a state event.
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And that's not just a recruitment or drafting support, but the issue is that's how you get to know people.
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We we're supposed to care for all people.
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It doesn't mean we all like the exact same things, and that's okay.
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But if but if people feel comfortable say, I don't know, and I'm gonna get stronger in this, or hey, you know what, I don't have to be strong in this.
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As a leader, I can say I can go partner with them, and maybe I don't have to provide it, but boy, I can do something for my residents or my for my teammates, employees.
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Um, but I can do it with somebody else who already does it well, that's a huge win.
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And I think there still remains a little bit of fear for people to say, I don't know.
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And I feel like it's been those are missed opportunities.
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And so I've really kind of gone the other direction.
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We our leadership is not a democracy per se, but we make our decisions together.
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We can do it, but maybe we don't have the bandwidth.
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Or maybe we have the bandwidth, but we're working on something else.
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But we share in it together, knowing that we're all in it together.
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And it just, I think for everyone, we feel like it's able to be accomplished.
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And and I will say for my team, they've worked very hard uh in these last few years because we moved at a pace the organization had not typically moved at before, but that's because of them.
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And because um because they're free, but we had a meeting last week and they're like, Mark, that's not a good idea.
00:17:23.279 --> 00:17:25.440
And I'm like, Yeah, you're right, it's not.
00:17:25.440 --> 00:17:26.720
So we just pivoted.
00:17:26.720 --> 00:17:30.720
And and that that's I'd I would not have been there 20 years ago.
00:17:30.720 --> 00:17:34.079
Um learn that early on.
00:17:34.079 --> 00:17:43.839
There's so many good people in this ministry that we're in, and we don't get take the time to get to know them all, or at least some of them, to make our lives better in what we do.
00:17:44.960 --> 00:17:45.359
So great.
00:17:45.359 --> 00:17:46.640
It's vulnerability, right?
00:17:46.640 --> 00:17:47.440
Vulnerability.
00:17:47.519 --> 00:17:49.359
Yeah, it's a wonderful, it's an asset.
00:17:49.359 --> 00:17:50.480
It is not a weakness.
00:17:51.680 --> 00:18:04.480
I love that that's sort of like changing in the landscape, though, of what we're you know, teaching within our leadership, um, within the Leading Age Leadership Academy, within our cohort at Leading Age Texas, um, the leadership collective.
00:18:04.480 --> 00:18:07.920
I think, you know, sort of spotlighting that.
00:18:07.920 --> 00:18:09.119
I mean, that is the hope, right?
00:18:09.119 --> 00:18:10.640
That like learning that early on.
00:18:10.640 --> 00:18:12.960
So that um I don't know.
00:18:12.960 --> 00:18:13.359
Thank you.
00:18:13.359 --> 00:18:18.319
Thank you for talking about that and giving some real world context to that.
00:18:18.640 --> 00:18:21.119
I figure if a if a bot can learn, we can learn.
00:18:21.119 --> 00:18:21.599
Um, right?
00:18:21.599 --> 00:18:22.799
I mean I mean, really.
00:18:22.799 --> 00:18:28.240
There and there is that human part of it, which I think that still enlivens me and surprises me.
00:18:28.240 --> 00:18:34.000
I mean, even from an algorithmic standpoint, you can kind of figure out directions that some AI will go, but then you start, you meet people and they confound you.
00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:37.039
We are an industry of people working with people, serving people.
00:18:37.039 --> 00:18:39.279
It is the greatest formula for chaos ever created.
00:18:39.279 --> 00:18:41.039
And it's fun as long it out.
00:18:42.319 --> 00:18:46.319
Thank you for joining for part one of my conversation with Mark Lenhard.
00:18:46.319 --> 00:18:53.519
I am grateful to have had the chance to record this on location in Boston and to share Mark's insights and lived experience with all of you.
00:18:53.519 --> 00:19:10.960
In part two, get excited, we'll go a little bit deeper and talk about his TEDx talk a little bit more and what it was like for him to step onto that stage, the impact of storytelling and shaping how we understand aging and how we communicate about it, and the hope that he carries for the future of our field.
00:19:10.960 --> 00:19:14.160
It's a powerful continuation of today's discussion.
00:19:14.160 --> 00:19:18.000
Until then, go ahead and listen to Mark's TEDx talk.
00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:19.839
We've linked it in the show notes.
00:19:19.839 --> 00:19:22.160
And we hope to see you for the next episode.
00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:27.680
Thanks for tuning in to upward aging of leading aid access.
00:00:03.520 --> 00:00:05.280
This is uplift aging.
00:00:05.280 --> 00:00:08.720
A podcast that's more than a podcast.
00:00:08.720 --> 00:00:18.239
This is a challenge to embrace growing older, to confront negative stereotypes, and better understand what may come with aging.
00:00:18.239 --> 00:00:21.120
I'm your host, Amanda Weed and Fellowship.
00:00:21.120 --> 00:00:23.600
Together, let's uplift aging.
00:00:23.600 --> 00:00:32.640
I am thrilled to bring you our first on location episode of Uplift Aging.
00:00:32.640 --> 00:00:38.399
I sat down with the insightful Mark Lenhard in Boston during the Leading Age annual meeting.
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Mark is someone many of us admire in the field.
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He's a longtime leader in aging services and now serves as president and CEO of United Methodist Communities in New Jersey.
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This is part one of a two-part conversation with Mark.
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This is just the first part of my conversation with Mark.
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We broke this.
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We've broken this up into two episodes.
00:01:06.319 --> 00:01:19.920
In this one we talk a little about his in this one we talk a little bit about his experience and perspective on aging, the message at the heart of his work.
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We touch on his TEDx talk and we tease it a little bit.
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The link is below for you all.
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And we discuss the role that community and connection play in helping all of us age well.
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Part two will take us a little deeper into his recent TEDx talk, his experience on that stage, and afterward, the power of storytelling and his hope for the future of aging.
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This first half, though, is a thoughtful, inspiring conversation that invites all of us to rethink what it means to age successfully.
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So let's get started.
00:01:50.560 --> 00:01:51.040
We're here.
00:01:55.280 --> 00:01:58.239
I want to start with your TEDx talk.
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If you can give us kind of a little look inside how it happened, like how did this come to fruition, and then um walk us through, I guess, a little bit of that day.
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Sure.
00:02:09.120 --> 00:02:09.439
Yeah.
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Uh it was an interesting start.
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As I know many of us do, we get called to talk to different people about aging services and so on and so forth.
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And what I found was I was being asked about people that are age ed, older.
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And so um, but that's really not what the journey's been.
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It's really been more about aging.
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So I'm like, well, do we need to be talking about being old or do we need to be talking about what aging is?
00:02:32.400 --> 00:02:36.560
And how do we need to become more educated about aging successfully?
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It's only a slightly different perspective.
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In fact, I think many of the people that we get to work with, and I grew up working with, um, they know that.
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But I don't know that everybody does.
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And so um, we were talking with a local school, because we were going to be starting a youth board for the purpose of just bringing in new perspectives, people that wouldn't otherwise not be able to be on a board, that didn't have work experience, but we were missing innovative practices.
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And one of them said, Um, huh, I haven't really thought about being old.
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I'm like, well, what about aging?
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What did what does next year look like?
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What does next 10 years look like?
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I haven't really given it much thought.
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They had some great ideas.
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So that was really the start of it was when is the right time to start start talking about aging?
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We're always aging.
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So I actually opened my TED talk with a pop quiz.
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And the question is, how many of you are aging?
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And it was intro what you think was gonna be an easy question, but many pe there were people that didn't answer.
00:03:28.879 --> 00:03:38.719
And so it was just the thought, just that little shift of what does it mean to be aging well and successfully, which is different for everyone.
00:03:38.719 --> 00:03:40.240
So that's kind of how it started.
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And the talk is called Reenvisioning Aging Successfully.
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When I first read it, I was like, you could have stopped at reenvisioning aging, but tell me about the addition of successfully.
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I love that.
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So well, that was there was some intentionality with that because a lot of the conversations that I had been having recently were about um uh being winning at aging was was quantity, that the length of time.
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But there have been a lot of experiences, again, I know that we've all had of people who've not lived to past a hundred or whatever, but have had incredible lives.
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And so and were very successful in it.
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So if it's whether it's eighty or eighty-five or ninety or a hundred and five, um, did they look and say, I've lived abundantly, I've lived well, I this has been a successful time for me.
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My time may be different than yours.
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Um and so it was important to bring that in as something that continued also to be aspirational.
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And so again, the the talk kind of goes a little bit more into that, but it's about being purpose-driven and that purposes change.
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And so that it's what we are isn't necessarily who we become, and the opportunities just do things differently throughout our lives.
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Tell us a little bit more about um the others who were at this event, the other um speakers at this event, and the overall was it about being human, right?
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Like this was the concept.
00:05:05.120 --> 00:05:08.000
So, yeah, walk us through that a little bit.
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Well, so um how do we as human beings, how are we looking at things?
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We're uh obviously aging was important, technology, artificial intelligence.
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We had two um uh speakers on artificial intelligence.
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Uh, we had talked about uh death and dying.
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In fact, there was a comedian who her seeing her mother in the dying process with Alzheimer's, brought in a comedian to be by her side to continue to give her laughter every day.
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And she's like, I know that sounded really irreverent, but I really mean, but mom was happy.
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And so, and she's and she was a kind of a uh comedian throughout her years, and so she's like, I started this so that others could experience that kind of joy and the the euphoria that comes from laughter, and it was just a simple thing.
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I'm like, oh my gosh, that's so profound.
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So it was finding uh different people that talked about different aspects of even in the most technological part, AI, how is being human really important to that?
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And we were struggling with that today in the industry.
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Yes, we can make things better with AI, but we're never gonna take the human touch away.
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And so, how do those things combine?
00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:11.759
So that was really the idea was to approach it from a number of different angles.
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And so uh mine was kind of the aging and also social side of it, and um uh you know, I I spin a yarn, and so is the idea of the examples of the people that I've encountered throughout my career and how those lives define successful agents.
00:06:26.480 --> 00:06:31.519
So, can I ask, what does being human mean to you if you had to distill it?
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Um I I think it relationship.
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I think relationship.
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And I've said this before about leading age, and certainly in leading age, Texas, the breadth of my career and what I've been called to do has been only enhanced by the people that I've encountered to meet.
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Many of you have my career is because of the people that watch this and who came before.
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And so um I um it's relationship.
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And I find that the more that people are connected with one another, even in the smallest amounts, that really lends to that sense of connectivity, success, living abundantly.
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It's just it's um and it's snowballs.
00:07:05.839 --> 00:07:07.040
I love that is so true.
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And uh and I've seen that, you know, having had the opportunity to work with you when you were in Texas, yeah.
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Um, board member of ours on the executive committee.
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All I mean, you you I feel like you are um sort of a convener of people, but you also are someone who um seems to at least thrive off of being around others and being around others who are maybe a few steps ahead of where you want to be and and the latter as well.
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Tell us a little bit about um where you are now.
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You're no longer in in Texas.
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We miss you dearly at Leading Age, Texas, but love that Leading Age, New Jersey, Delaware um gets to have you as a member.
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Tell us a little bit about what brought you into saying yes to that big move.
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I mean, that is a heck of a cross-country move, and um and what led to that, and then how you kind of thread um what we were just talking about of that uh connection and relationship um into what you're doing now and where you are.
00:08:05.600 --> 00:08:07.279
Uh it was a big leap.
00:08:07.279 --> 00:08:08.959
Um, and it was hard.
00:08:08.959 --> 00:08:14.639
Uh, but I knew that to continue to do what I do well, I had to be challenged by something.
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And I think I had having I was really shaped by the people that were there.
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I go back and I think about at a time when in Texas when almost all the communities were all, I mean, the all the CEOs were reverenced something or other, right?
00:08:26.079 --> 00:08:26.959
I mean, really it was.
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And and I worked for several of them and um and grew up with a number of the people that are now the leaders of those organizations and have been shaped by them.
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And and so uh the what I've been able to accomplish um and even opportunities, things where I've been able to skip or or circumnavigate problems because others have gone through it.
00:08:44.799 --> 00:09:00.320
And I think that's where it is, is that the the continued comfortable nature of the the leaders throughout Texas, yourself, George, the association, to bring people together to even just not necessarily assault, but say, hey, here are the shared issues that we have.
00:09:00.320 --> 00:09:08.720
Um, because we've we've talked about Medicaid and we've talked about staffing, and we've talked these are these are things that are never going to go away, but to understand different perspectives and how to work for it at the time.
00:09:08.720 --> 00:09:10.480
So uh that was difficult.
00:09:10.480 --> 00:09:12.799
But I also wanted to continue to grow in that.
00:09:12.799 --> 00:09:14.960
And so uh this opportunity came up.
00:09:14.960 --> 00:09:19.200
Now I will say the fact that my wife was born in New Jersey probably helped with that a little bit.
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Um, and we have family up this way, and so uh this has been for our time of life to be able to connect with family members again and to expand on that with cousins and such.
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And so um it's been a very personally enriching time, which um I think has helped me look at things in a new way.
00:09:37.279 --> 00:09:45.279
So as we're starting to experience people who are older uh in our own families, uh it's caused me to look at things a little bit differently, even from I'm 54.
00:09:45.279 --> 00:09:48.159
Now I was thinking when I joined Leading Age, I was 22.
00:09:48.399 --> 00:09:48.879
Oh my goodness.
00:09:49.120 --> 00:09:50.320
So it's been a few years.
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Uh and so um baby.
00:09:52.799 --> 00:09:54.080
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Without a doubt.
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I know, I know.
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Still a child inside, but I'm gonna never gonna let that go.
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But so with that, I don't think you leave the relationships behind.
00:10:02.799 --> 00:10:07.039
So I'm you know, I've still been in touch with George, I've been still in touch with others, I've been talking with people.
00:10:07.039 --> 00:10:12.240
Um, I think of like um, it's okay to mention like Rodney Reuter and Pat Crump and Nicole Game.
00:10:12.240 --> 00:10:16.000
I mean, I I don't want to I don't want to miss anybody, but that's just part of who I am.
00:10:16.000 --> 00:10:17.200
I think about those things.
00:10:17.200 --> 00:10:21.840
And there were wonderful things we were doing in Texas, but there are wonderful things in New Jersey and Delaware.
00:10:21.840 --> 00:10:24.320
Um, and uh I saw you there really.
00:10:24.320 --> 00:10:28.720
Actually, my first meeting, or my first annual meeting really with New Jersey, and that was great.
00:10:28.720 --> 00:10:34.080
Um, so it was just about saying, what did I learn and then how could I uh take an organization?
00:10:34.080 --> 00:10:36.559
And it was no dissimilar than something in Texas.
00:10:36.559 --> 00:10:48.480
It was a 118-year organization that had been doing great stuff, that had been punched in the gut because of COVID and needed to reinvent itself and create, you know, some steam go in a new direction.
00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:56.960
And um I think the most kind of cathartic part was to be in a new environment where I wasn't as comfortable.
00:10:56.960 --> 00:11:00.720
That actually surprisingly became a wonderful skill set.
00:11:00.720 --> 00:11:07.200
So, because I knew Texas and I knew nowhere to go, and I knew the communities and I knew the people there, and um, but I didn't hear.
00:11:07.200 --> 00:11:13.919
I mean, I had to re-kind of recreate who I was in relationship, and that caused me to um really rely upon my team.
00:11:13.919 --> 00:11:19.440
I've built an incredible team, and for the first time broadly in my career, I'm able to just say, hey, you know, you go and make that happen.
00:11:19.440 --> 00:11:20.720
I'm gonna get out of the way.
00:11:20.720 --> 00:11:24.000
Um, and then we make these decisions together on how we can grow.
00:11:24.000 --> 00:11:30.399
And so we've been able to to really focus on more innovative things than just retreading the old formulas.
00:11:30.399 --> 00:11:45.360
Um so it's uh to be, well, I guess I was 52 at the time, to be 52 and start in a whole new area where I didn't know anybody, and I had to get to know the community and the new uh regulatory environment and four seasons that weren't just hot, hot, hot, hot.
00:11:45.600 --> 00:11:45.840
Naturally.
00:11:46.320 --> 00:11:47.440
10 minutes of wet and then hot.
00:11:47.440 --> 00:11:49.759
It's oh yeah, no, it's been that's that is lovely.
00:11:49.759 --> 00:11:50.320
I will say it.
00:11:50.320 --> 00:11:55.200
And like I'm 40 minutes from the beach and I'm 40 minutes from the mountains, and that's all, you know, 50 minutes from the from the city.
00:11:55.200 --> 00:12:01.279
So anyway, it's been um it's been wonderful to take those ideas and and refresh them, and it has to be new.
00:12:01.279 --> 00:12:03.519
You can't just transplant them.
00:12:04.159 --> 00:12:10.080
Um like it has to be organic within that new situation and the new people that you're with and the history.
00:12:10.240 --> 00:12:12.799
I mean, it was a hundred and 118 years now, yeah.
00:12:12.799 --> 00:12:15.120
Yeah, and contractually speaking, though, I do get to say y'all.
00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:16.559
I did make sure that was in my contract.
00:12:16.559 --> 00:12:17.360
I get to say y'all.
00:12:17.360 --> 00:12:17.840
Good.
00:12:17.840 --> 00:12:29.360
Um, and actually think that was my first word to the to the leading age association because we I did an award, I think, three days later, to one of my teammates in front of Leading Age New Jersey and Delaware, and I said, Well, hey, y'all, and it was just quiet.
00:12:30.080 --> 00:12:30.399
Oh my god.
00:12:30.399 --> 00:12:33.840
But anyway, but you being authentic in your in yourself, right?
00:12:33.840 --> 00:12:35.679
Yeah, you can't, you can't.
00:12:35.679 --> 00:12:37.200
No, that's so great.
00:12:37.200 --> 00:12:46.159
I think what we do at Leading Age Texas and Leading Age National and all the state affiliates is so focused on leadership in aging services.
00:12:46.159 --> 00:12:53.279
And I think what you just expressed is something that I mean I'm taking as as a as a lesson.
00:12:53.279 --> 00:13:00.720
So thank you for sharing that because I feel like we can oftentimes get so um you talked about the comfortability.
00:13:00.720 --> 00:13:31.919
I feel like we can get so comfortable in in where we are, and and at the same time, like we are, you know, making a difference, we are making an impact, we are fulfilling missions, and we're and we're working with the residents, and and it's and it's great work for you to be doing all of that and to sort of answer this call and and making this huge move, um, and what you've learned about yourself and how it sounded to me like you um you really not that you hadn't anyway, but really put family first.
00:13:31.919 --> 00:13:40.399
Like this was this was a as was a a sort of like statement you were making to yourself, the team that you've built, and being able to say, like, hey, you guys got this.
00:13:40.399 --> 00:13:43.360
Um, I'm gonna step aside and let you do your thing.
00:13:43.360 --> 00:14:02.159
I feel like that is something that is hard to do in a situation where you've been for years, or even, you know, I know you served in several different communities in Texas, but um even in that same kind of I guess family of communities, kind of stepping outside of that and being able to recreate boundaries for yourself and leadership.
00:14:02.159 --> 00:14:15.120
Um, what would you say to the people in our leadership collective or people who are coming up in aging services to cheer them on a little bit as they're as they're walking through those decisions or needing to make those kind of kind of moves maybe?
00:14:15.600 --> 00:14:16.960
First, I would say family is important.
00:14:16.960 --> 00:14:22.399
I mean, I my my parents died early on, so my my kids always had 400 to 700 grandparents, right?
00:14:22.399 --> 00:14:24.320
I mean, the boys learn to dance with the residents.
00:14:24.320 --> 00:14:24.559
Yeah.
00:14:24.559 --> 00:14:28.720
My daughter, you know, she would serve at Easter, you know, lunch or breakfast or brunch or whatever.
00:14:28.720 --> 00:14:33.360
And and so for us to be successful in what we do, you have to have that engagement.
00:14:33.360 --> 00:14:40.080
And I I know that I I don't do anything well without the support of my wife who's kind of supported me through all this to do what I need to do.
00:14:40.080 --> 00:14:52.639
Um for many of you who know her, is very tolerant, but anyway, um, so that is important, and you have to do it because if you if if you aren't in the right place, you you know it.
00:14:52.639 --> 00:14:54.559
And that's not about even at that time.
00:14:54.559 --> 00:15:02.320
I mean, I think all those places were the right place for me as I felt called to do the different places I needed to be, and then you grow through them out of them, or whatever the case is.
00:15:02.320 --> 00:15:16.960
Um, but for for emerging leaders, I think probably the thing that I struggled with the most was there was a time when I had mentors, I looked at them like, you need to do this, you need to know everything, you know, no weakness, no fear, so on and so forth.
00:15:16.960 --> 00:15:20.480
And I really felt like there was a period of time in which I missed out.
00:15:20.480 --> 00:15:30.960
If I had felt more comfortable say, I don't know, if I had felt more comfortable at an earlier time saying, I need to get to know this person, they are doing it well.
00:15:30.960 --> 00:15:33.039
Maybe I don't have to reinvent the wheel.
00:15:33.039 --> 00:15:38.879
Because there are incredibly innovative ideas out there, but you don't always have to be the one to recreate it, right?
00:15:38.879 --> 00:15:41.919
And so that's why I keep going back to networking.
00:15:41.919 --> 00:15:47.039
If we the associations do this, but it's a it's a two-way street.
00:15:47.039 --> 00:15:48.559
I think sometimes people forget that.
00:15:48.559 --> 00:15:53.360
The leading uh leading age, Texas New York, whoever it is, even national, they can't do it to you.
00:15:53.360 --> 00:15:55.440
It's a medium by which it occurs.
00:15:55.440 --> 00:15:59.279
You have to put whatever you want to get out of it, you gotta put into it.
00:15:59.279 --> 00:16:03.679
And that means you can't grinch about policy, you need to be part of the policy committee.
00:16:03.679 --> 00:16:09.519
You can't want to say, you know, everyone should feel more welcomed, but not serve on the welcome committee for a state event.
00:16:09.519 --> 00:16:14.320
And that's not just a recruitment or drafting support, but the issue is that's how you get to know people.
00:16:14.320 --> 00:16:17.519
We we're supposed to care for all people.
00:16:17.519 --> 00:16:20.320
It doesn't mean we all like the exact same things, and that's okay.
00:16:20.320 --> 00:16:28.159
But if but if people feel comfortable say, I don't know, and I'm gonna get stronger in this, or hey, you know what, I don't have to be strong in this.
00:16:28.159 --> 00:16:35.120
As a leader, I can say I can go partner with them, and maybe I don't have to provide it, but boy, I can do something for my residents or my for my teammates, employees.
00:16:35.120 --> 00:16:39.679
Um, but I can do it with somebody else who already does it well, that's a huge win.
00:16:39.679 --> 00:16:44.960
And I think there still remains a little bit of fear for people to say, I don't know.
00:16:44.960 --> 00:16:49.360
And I feel like it's been those are missed opportunities.
00:16:49.360 --> 00:16:51.200
And so I've really kind of gone the other direction.
00:16:51.200 --> 00:16:55.759
We our leadership is not a democracy per se, but we make our decisions together.
00:16:55.759 --> 00:16:57.759
We can do it, but maybe we don't have the bandwidth.
00:16:57.759 --> 00:17:00.080
Or maybe we have the bandwidth, but we're working on something else.
00:17:00.080 --> 00:17:03.919
But we share in it together, knowing that we're all in it together.
00:17:03.919 --> 00:17:07.359
And it just, I think for everyone, we feel like it's able to be accomplished.
00:17:07.359 --> 00:17:17.599
And and I will say for my team, they've worked very hard uh in these last few years because we moved at a pace the organization had not typically moved at before, but that's because of them.
00:17:17.599 --> 00:17:23.279
And because um because they're free, but we had a meeting last week and they're like, Mark, that's not a good idea.
00:17:23.279 --> 00:17:25.440
And I'm like, Yeah, you're right, it's not.
00:17:25.440 --> 00:17:26.720
So we just pivoted.
00:17:26.720 --> 00:17:30.720
And and that that's I'd I would not have been there 20 years ago.
00:17:30.720 --> 00:17:34.079
Um learn that early on.
00:17:34.079 --> 00:17:43.839
There's so many good people in this ministry that we're in, and we don't get take the time to get to know them all, or at least some of them, to make our lives better in what we do.
00:17:44.960 --> 00:17:45.359
So great.
00:17:45.359 --> 00:17:46.640
It's vulnerability, right?
00:17:46.640 --> 00:17:47.440
Vulnerability.
00:17:47.519 --> 00:17:49.359
Yeah, it's a wonderful, it's an asset.
00:17:49.359 --> 00:17:50.480
It is not a weakness.
00:17:51.680 --> 00:18:04.480
I love that that's sort of like changing in the landscape, though, of what we're you know, teaching within our leadership, um, within the Leading Age Leadership Academy, within our cohort at Leading Age Texas, um, the leadership collective.
00:18:04.480 --> 00:18:07.920
I think, you know, sort of spotlighting that.
00:18:07.920 --> 00:18:09.119
I mean, that is the hope, right?
00:18:09.119 --> 00:18:10.640
That like learning that early on.
00:18:10.640 --> 00:18:12.960
So that um I don't know.
00:18:12.960 --> 00:18:13.359
Thank you.
00:18:13.359 --> 00:18:18.319
Thank you for talking about that and giving some real world context to that.
00:18:18.640 --> 00:18:21.119
I figure if a if a bot can learn, we can learn.
00:18:21.119 --> 00:18:21.599
Um, right?
00:18:21.599 --> 00:18:22.799
I mean I mean, really.
00:18:22.799 --> 00:18:28.240
There and there is that human part of it, which I think that still enlivens me and surprises me.
00:18:28.240 --> 00:18:34.000
I mean, even from an algorithmic standpoint, you can kind of figure out directions that some AI will go, but then you start, you meet people and they confound you.
00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:37.039
We are an industry of people working with people, serving people.
00:18:37.039 --> 00:18:39.279
It is the greatest formula for chaos ever created.
00:18:39.279 --> 00:18:41.039
And it's fun as long it out.
00:18:42.319 --> 00:18:46.319
Thank you for joining for part one of my conversation with Mark Lenhard.
00:18:46.319 --> 00:18:53.519
I am grateful to have had the chance to record this on location in Boston and to share Mark's insights and lived experience with all of you.
00:18:53.519 --> 00:19:10.960
In part two, get excited, we'll go a little bit deeper and talk about his TEDx talk a little bit more and what it was like for him to step onto that stage, the impact of storytelling and shaping how we understand aging and how we communicate about it, and the hope that he carries for the future of our field.
00:19:10.960 --> 00:19:14.160
It's a powerful continuation of today's discussion.
00:19:14.160 --> 00:19:18.000
Until then, go ahead and listen to Mark's TEDx talk.
00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:19.839
We've linked it in the show notes.
00:19:19.839 --> 00:19:22.160
And we hope to see you for the next episode.
00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:27.680
Thanks for tuning in to upward aging of leading aid access.
