00:00:00FALL IN, MAGGOTS: UNRELENTING DOES NOT RELENT
00:00:08FRIDAY EARLY DROP: NO PREP, NO SCHEDULE, NO EXCUSES
00:00:22VACATION LIBERATION: DO WHATEVER YOU WANT, PRIVATE
00:00:30ON TIME WHEN WE FEEL LIKE IT, NOT WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE IT
00:00:57THREE SHOWS THIS WEEK: TODAY MIGHT BE A HALF-HOUR DEATH MARCH
00:01:11MAC NETWORK CARD POWER SAVINGS: KILL THAT SETTING
00:01:41TRAVEL KIT INSPECTION: ROKU, WHITE NOISE, TRAVEL ROUTER
00:02:26ROUTER TAKING FIRE: CANNOT EVEN PING 192.168.1.1
00:02:40WALMART ROUTER WAS NOT THE ENEMY, YOU LOOPED THE CABLE
00:02:58LOOP PROTECTION EXISTS BECAUSE OF MORONS LIKE YOU
00:03:17FIELD PRANK: PLUG BOTH ENDS INTO THE SAME SWITCH
00:03:42TEN GIG OR GO HOME, BABY
00:04:00FOURTEEN DEAD ETHERNET CABLES UNDER THE DESK
00:04:20CABLE GRAVEYARD: NEW WINDOWS MEAN TEAR IT ALL DOWN
00:04:57DESK UPS REQUISITION: LITHIUM, NOT THAT LEAD BRICK
00:05:11GENE'S GRIFTCAST 2026: THE FREE UPS MYTH, DESTROYED
00:05:48MOVE THOSE SPINNING DRIVES TO THE BASEMENT, NASA
00:06:18DROBO ORANGE LIGHT: NOT DEATH, JUST OUT OF SPACE
00:06:34TWO WEEKS OF MUSIC HOARDED, UNDER ONE PERCENT CONSUMED
00:07:22JUSTWATCH AUDIT: STOP STORING WHAT HULU ALREADY HAS
00:08:05BAYWATCH: TWO HUNDRED FIFTY GIGS OF ALLEGED EDUCATION
00:08:33PAMELA, ERICA, AND THE BRUNETTE IN THE BACKGROUND
00:08:52EXECUTIVE ORDER: AMERICA IS NOW ON HALF-HOUR TIME
00:09:14INDIANA TIME-ZONE SHIFT: EIGHT MILES AND YOU ARE A DIFFERENT MAN
00:09:26DAYLIGHT SAVINGS AMBUSH: ASLEEP AT 2030, UP AT 0500
00:09:58ABOLISH TIME ZONES: GMT OR GET OUT
00:10:38GAMERS AND PILOTS: THE ONLY TWO UNITS THAT RUN ON ZULU
00:10:49HE LANDED THE PLANE BECAUSE HE PLAYED VIDEO GAMES
00:11:05ANY PILOT UNDER FIFTY-FIVE STARTED IN FLIGHT SIMULATOR
00:11:42HIGH SCHOOL FLIGHT CLASS LOST TO THE COMPUTER LAB
00:12:36AUTOPILOT IS BETTER THAN YOU, STILL WANT A HUMAN IN THE SEAT
00:12:57CARGO PLANES FIRST, THEN THE CONFUSED MACHINE FALLS OUT OF THE SKY
00:13:34TRUCKERS CAPPED AT ELEVEN HOURS, TESLA DOES NOT GET TIRED
00:14:07EIGHT HOURS BEHIND THE WHEEL AND YOU ARE ALREADY DEAD
00:15:00WEST BADEN TWISTIES KEEP YOU AWAKE, TEXAS FLAT PUTS YOU DOWN
00:16:01TESLA TRUCK: THREE HOURS CHARGE, TWENTY-ONE HOURS OF WAR
00:16:29LITHIUM CYCLE COUNT: A THOUSAND DISCHARGES AND THE TRUCK IS DONE
00:17:07CHILDHOOD FANTASY: DRAG A POWER LINE UNDER THE CAR
00:17:41CALIFORNIA'S SIXTY-MILE INDUCTIVE ROAD THAT WILL NEVER EXIST
00:20:05DETROIT ALREADY BUILT THE WIRELESS CHARGING ROAD
00:21:06QUARTER MILE OF MAGIC ROAD, ELLIE THE FORD E-TRANSIT
00:21:42INDUCTIVE CHARGING IS INEFFICIENT, TWO MILLION A QUARTER MILE
00:22:26HIGH-SPEED RAIL: HOUSTON TO DALLAS, STILL A BRIEFING SLIDE
00:22:49GET THE SWINGERS TO HOUSTON, DALLAS IS THE CAPITAL
00:23:30WHO SHOT J.R.'S LOAD: DALLAS WAS A SOAP FOR MEN
00:23:57LANDMAN: SHOWED UP FOR BILLY BOB, STAYED FOR THE FAMILY
00:24:15RESORT MENU: FOUR-HUNDRED-DOLLAR MASSAGE, WRONG BUSINESS
00:25:07MASSAGE HANGOVER: TOXINS OR JUST SOMEBODY MASHING YOU
00:26:12CHIROPRACTOR OVER MASSEUSE, ACUPUNCTURE EQUALS NAP TIME
00:26:34DO NOT FEED THE MAGWAI AFTER MIDNIGHT
00:26:481902 HOTEL: CHICAGO MOBSTER WEDDING, DEAD IN A MONTH
00:27:43DAYTIME CASINO: WALKERS, VIDEO POKER HIDDEN IN THE CORNER
00:28:18ELECTRONIC ROULETTE AND CRAPS: DEALERS, YOU ARE RELIEVED
00:28:49SELF-SERVE SODA FOUNTAIN: NO TIPS, STILL TIP THE MAIDS
00:29:48TWO BOTTLES OF REVERSE-OSMOSIS WATER, NOT FIJI
00:30:41LIFETIME TITANIUM: QUARTER MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE WATER
00:31:32FIRST CLASS OR DON'T FLY: LEGS DO NOT NEGOTIATE
00:32:03SEATTLE FARE REPORT: COACH 750, FIRST 1600, WORLD CUP SURGE
00:33:34DOCTOR SAID DON'T FLY: BRING YOUR OWN PADDLES, CALL IT A CPAP
00:34:11PASSENGER ROSTER FROM HELL: SHOES OFF, SPREAD OUT, RUDE
00:34:31HAIR-FLIP INCIDENT: FOURTEEN PASSES OVER THE SEATBACK
00:35:31KIDS BELONG IN COACH, OR BETTER, AT HOME
00:35:51KID-FREE HOTEL: FREE-RANGE EIGHTIES, NOT CONFINED SPACES
00:36:28EVEL KNIEVEL BIKE: FIRST REAL FREEDOM
00:36:49SEVEN MILES TO THE MALLRATS MALL, ORANGE JULIUS FOR DINNER
00:38:01ORANGE JULIUS: TANG, ICE, AND A LIE ABOUT ORANGES
00:39:23TWO THEATERS IN ONE MALL: SCREENS USED TO BE LARGE
00:39:56RETURN OF THE JEDI, 25 MAY 1983, SOUTHTOWN THEATER
00:40:47BEST SHOWS ARE THE ONES WE FORGOT TO HIT RECORD ON
00:41:04NETNED'S MOTORBIKE AT TWELVE: PARENTS WANTED HIM GONE
00:41:35EIGHTIES TEENAGE INDEPENDENCE: HOME BY SUNSET, REPEAT
00:41:55TRASH-80 BBS VERSUS EVERYBODY ELSE ON A SMARTPHONE
00:42:26CB RADIO IN THE BEDROOM SO YOU STOP TYING UP THE PHONE
00:42:47BREAKER ONE-NINE: TRUCKERS HATE THE KID IN THE FAST LANE
00:43:20CONVOY, BUFORD T. JUSTICE, GET OFF ONE-NINE
00:44:06INDIANA DAY SHIFT: WALKERS SPENDING THE 401K
00:44:41DIE WITH FIFTY BUCKS LEFT: ZOOMERS CAN CRY ABOUT IT
00:45:07SLOT MACHINES: HOW FAST CAN YOU BURN THIRTY-THREE DOLLARS
00:45:54VIDEO POKER TRUTH: ONLY THE ROYAL FLUSH PAYS
00:46:24NICKEL MACHINE LIE: BUCK FIFTY A PUSH FOR THE BONUS
00:47:05CREDITS, NOT DOLLARS: THEY DO NOT WANT YOU TO SEE THE BLEED
00:47:49UNDER TWO BUCKS AND SUDDENLY YOU WIN: PAYOUT PERCENTAGE RULES
00:49:09HUMAN POKER: MORONS BLUFF TWOS, SOMETIMES THE RIVER SAVES THEM
00:50:11AI GLASSES: CARD COUNTING IS ABOUT TO GET BANNED
00:51:00GLASSES AND HEARING AIDS: BOTH NOW SUSPECT EQUIPMENT
00:51:22GAMBLE ONLINE, THEN TRY TO GET THE RUBLES BACK OUT
00:52:00CSB'S NEEDLES: 32 GAUGE IS FOR CHILDREN, SWITCH TO 31s
00:54:00NOT MEDICAL ADVICE, ZERO MEDICAL ADVICE, DISMISSED
00:54:14VALUE FOR VALUE: WAWA, MARK CODER TIMES TWO, SCOTT IN THE UK
00:55:16MARK'S CANCER SURGERY: FUCK CANCER, FINGERS CROSSED
00:55:31FIRST VACATION IN TEN YEARS THAT LEFT THE HOUSE
00:56:03CSB ORDERS YOU TO YOUTUBE: AI ARCHWIZARD, ASK ABOUT OZEMPIC
00:56:51OZEMPIC MUSCLE LOSS: NO PROTEIN, NO LIFTING, NO EXCUSES
00:58:07GYM PLAN: HOLD A MAC STUDIO IN ONE HAND FOR FIVE MINUTES
00:58:22M5 ULTRA, 512 GIGS: IT DOES NOT COUNT UNTIL IT ARRIVES
00:58:50RUSSIAN BUDDY'S MAC STUDIO SHOOTOUT: WATCH THE TAPE
00:59:21256 GIGS IS NOT FOURTEEN GRAND, 512 WITH DISK IS
01:00:05NVIDIA SPARK: FIVE THOUSAND RETAIL, SEVEN THOUSAND SCALPED
01:00:47DAISY-CHAIN THEM: 200-GIG LINK, ONE MACHINE, TWO BRAINS
01:01:31LOCAL AI: WE CALLED IT, CLOUD IS STILL THE CHEAP ROUTE
01:01:56NVIDIA M30 RACK: NINETY-TWO THOUSAND NOW, FOUR THOUSAND LATER
01:02:22QWEN 3 LOCAL: CAN IT BUILD THE TASK MANAGER
01:02:45PORT THE MAC APP AND IT STILL EATS THE SAME RESOURCES
01:03:20CHANGE THE LOGO OR GO TO JAIL LIKE AL CAPONE
01:03:41JUST DO GOOD OLD BOYS WITH BEN: STILL ON THE AIR
01:03:561902 HOTEL WIFI: TWENTY MEG, NO LOGIN, SUITE THE SIZE OF A HOUSE
01:05:12SHOWER HEAD ABOVE THE HEAD: RAIN FROM THE CEILING
01:05:48HOTEL BED TOO TALL, TOO SOFT: JUMP IN, SWIM OUT
01:07:16GUEST-ROOM MATTRESS STILL FIRM, MASTER BED IS A DIVOT
01:08:16WATER HEATER: FOUR HUNDRED FIFTY POUNDS OF SEDIMENT
01:08:52COSTCO TANKLESS: CONTINUOUS HOT WATER, RETURN IT IN TEN YEARS
01:09:44ELLIPTICAL RETURNED AFTER EIGHTEEN MONTHS, FULL REFUND
01:11:28COSTCO TV PROGRAM: RETURN IT YEARLY, BUY THE BIGGER ONE
01:12:22FIVE-DOLLAR CHICKEN, AND IDIOCRACY ALREADY HAS THE HOOKERS
01:13:20HOTEL STARBUCKS PODS VERSUS GRINDING YOUR OWN BEANS
01:14:32ROOIBOS: AFRICAN TREE, SWEET, NOT REALLY TEA
01:15:30ZENCASTER CLIP DID NOT FIRE: AI INTERFACE, ZERO CLIPS
01:17:17ZOJIRUSHI HOT-WATER DISPENSER: ONE GALLON, EXACT TEMP
01:19:11CHINESE KNOCKOFF KETTLE: SAME BASE, CUP-PRESS SPOUT
01:21:34HAULING DISTILLED WATER HOME: A DOLLAR GALLON, LEAVE IT
01:22:09BIG RED AT KROGER: TEN BUCKS WITH THE CARD, TWENTY-ONE WITHOUT
01:22:51FAKE LOYALTY NUMBER: 867-5309, DO NOT PAY FULL PRICE
01:24:09RESORT SHUTTLE 24-7: ANYWHERE BUT THE LIQUOR STORE
01:25:13EIGHT HUNDRED ROOMS, LARRY BIRD'S FRENCH LICK
01:26:12MINERAL SPRINGS: PLUTO WATER, LITHIUM LAXATIVE, MILLIONS
01:27:35KID YEARS: PUTT-PUTT, SIX-LANE BOWLING, STAR WARS IN A 40-SEAT THEATER
01:28:48PETE DYE: FIVE HUNDRED A ROUND, TAGGART'S SECRET STAIR
01:29:44SUNSET DINNER: FILET OSCAR, LAST ONE OF THE SEASON
01:30:45FOUR SIXTY-TWO WITH TIP, AND THEN MOM PAID IT
01:30:53BUDDY STEAK PHOTOS: BEN'S TABLE, JAPAN AT FIVE HUNDRED A HEAD
01:32:29VOW OF PODCASTING: POVERTY WITH A MICROPHONE
01:32:41TWENTY-ONE SEATS, SIXTEEN DINNERS A YEAR, THAT IS EXCLUSIVE
01:34:27MOM CAUGHT THEM AT THE BUS: CHECK WAS ALREADY COVERED
01:35:32VACATION RULE: DO NOT COUNT THE PENNIES, DO NOT BUY TRINKETS
01:36:01ICED-TEA REFILL SCAM: GLASS OF ICE, BILL FOR THE AIR
01:37:10BREAKFAST COFFEE: SIX BUCKS, OWN CARAFE, UNLIMITED
01:38:26STEAKHOUSE NICKEL-AND-DIME: YOU ALREADY HAVE THE FILET
01:39:00YORKSHIRE TEA CHEAPER FROM SAUDI ARABIA THAN FROM ENGLAND
01:41:25ZENCASTER DROPPED AND REJOINED: ENERGY SAVINGS, SWITCH THE SWITCH
01:42:12LOCAL RECORD SURVIVES THE CUT: MERGE IT AT THE END
01:43:19BOOK PURSE: THE RAVEN, LES MIS CHARM, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS
01:44:54TIP PROTOCOL: TWENTY EVERYWHERE, TWENTY-FIVE AT THE MANSION
01:46:31HOST SOUNDED LIKE KATHY BATES, MEMPHIS ADJACENT
01:47:22MISERY LEGS AND THE OFFICE: KATHY PLAYS CRAZY
01:48:20AI SITCOM WITH A LAUGH TRACK: COMRADES, NINETIES TV QUALITY
01:50:00STONKS PARK: SOUTH PARK KNOCKOFF THAT ACTUALLY MOCKS SOUTH PARK
01:50:50BENNY JOHNSON SITTING NEXT TO TRUMP IN THE CARTOON
01:51:15GROK GUARDRAILS MAKE ZERO TACTICAL SENSE
01:51:48INSTAGRAM CHARACTER: LINGERIE DENIED, PROJECT MODE USED TO WORK
01:52:27IMAGINE LOOPHOLE: ASK FOR THE SMILE, GET THE WHOLE CELEBRITY
01:55:06LOCAL MODELS HAVE THE SAFETY STRIPPED: THAT IS THE POINT
01:55:31PHOTOSHOP WILL NOT REMOVE A TV FROM A NUDE YOU ACTUALLY SHOT
01:56:46FACEFUSION SKIN METER: TOO MUCH SKIN, REQUEST DENIED
01:57:08A CAR CAN COMMUTE OR RUN PEOPLE DOWN: BAN THE INFORMATION ANYWAY
01:57:55FOX PANICS OVER A CHINESE MODEL AND BIOWEAPONS
01:58:21ANARCHIST COOKBOOK, 1984: WE HAD THIS ON THE BBS
01:59:11BENNY JOHNSON DOUCHE TRIBUNAL: GENE DISSENTS, NETNED CONCURS
02:01:22EVERY MAN WITH A GUITAR IS A DOUCHE, ACCORDION EXEMPT
02:01:38LOBBY HARPIST, JAZZ BAND COVERS, PHIL COLLINS WITHOUT LYRICS
02:02:32ATRIUM WOULD HOST A MEETUP, THEN ABBA'S DANCING QUEEN STARTED
02:04:15CIRCULAR HOTEL: HALLWAY NEVER ENDS, COMPASS EVERY TWENTY FEET
02:05:51BUILT 1902, CLOSED 1932, GUESTS AGAIN IN 2007
02:07:11JESUITS FOR THIRTY YEARS, COLLEGE FOR SEVENTEEN, VACANT FOR THIRTEEN
02:07:35CHRISTIAN BROTHERS VERSUS JESUITS VERSUS FRANCISCANS
02:08:45WANT THE ORDER CHART, GO LISTEN TO PASTOR JIMMY
02:09:17PROTESTANTS SAY CATHOLICS ARE ON THE OTHER TEAM
02:10:40KINKY FRIEDMAN: THEY AIN'T MAKING JEWS LIKE JESUS ANYMORE
02:11:20ANGEL PAINTINGS IN A TEN-BY-TEN ROOM NOBODY CAN SEE
02:12:17ST. JOHN'S MINNESOTA: MONASTERY CAMPUS, HOUR AND A HALF ON THE BIKE
02:13:35REPRESSION SCALE: ATHEIST, PROTESTANT, CATHOLIC, BURQA
02:14:27THE POPE IS A WHITE SOX FAN, DIVINE INTERVENTION IN THE PLAYOFFS
02:14:46JEWISH GIRLS ARE NOT THE REPRESSED ONES, CSB OBJECTS
02:15:25COMPLAIN AT SIRGENETX: HE BLOCKS LIBERALLY
02:15:44ONE WEEK NEWS BLACKOUT: NO X, NO O'REILLY, NO USA TODAY
02:16:29BEFORE THE IPHONE YOU DID NOT CARE ABOUT LOUISIANA
02:17:21IPHONE DAY ONE: HALF HOUR EARLY, THREE HOURS IN LINE
02:18:40NUMBER PORTING IN THE STORE: SHOULD HAVE ISSUED A NEW NUMBER
02:19:34MINT MOBILE: TWO FORTY A YEAR, GENE WANTS CHEAPER
02:20:38XFINITY DEATH WATCH: FIBER IS COMING, LIGHTNING GETS WEAKER
02:21:16SEVEN LINES OF SHARED DATA VERSUS ONE MINT PLAN
02:21:46NOBODY WANTS DATA: DATA SCRUBS THE BRAIN
02:23:34GOOGLE MAPS RUNS TURN-BY-TURN WITH DATA SWITCHED OFF
02:25:03GARMIN STILL TRACKS GENE INTO THE PIGGLY WIGGLY
02:25:46ONE GIG A MONTH AT HOME, FIVE ON THE ROAD, MOSTLY MAPS
02:26:33DROP FIVE BUCKS AT UNRELENTING.SHOW/DONATE, POOR PODCASTERS
02:26:52OUTRO STING: JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT WE WOULD RELENT
