Neug (00:26)
Hello everybody, welcome back to the PSI Effect Podcast. I am Neug and I'm here with Franky. We are your host in this space, and today we're going to be talking about trick-or-treat, you know, since it's Halloween. However, we're not going to be talking about trick-or-treat in the way that you might think. We're
Franky (00:42)
Yeah.
Neug (00:43)
going to be talking about how you may be spoiling your surprise.
Franky (00:48)
All right.
Neug (00:48)
But before we do, I'd like to welcome all of our seasoned listeners as well as our newcomers. We'd like to invite you to go to your social spaces and like our content and subscribe to our shows. We really appreciate that. It helps push the push us up through the algorithm and helps other people find us. So we really appreciate your help there. Before we get any further, we always like to check in with Franky to see what's going on. But before we do, I want to say, Franky, this weather
Fall is really coming in because
Franky (01:17)
Yes.
Neug (01:19)
I went out yesterday for my walk in the early morning and it was like forty degrees, brother. And I'm like, it seemed like three weeks ago I was going out early in the morning and it was like seventy, almost eighty degrees. So fall has really jumped on in here quick.
Franky (01:33)
Mm-hmm.
It's coming. this is this is my this is my kind of weather. I love this ice cold weather, keeping it ice cold out there. And, I've been getting up a little bit earlier this week, getting out for some of my runs. So I'm out there, maybe five, five fifteen in the morning. And well, I can't even say it's morning because it's still nighttime outside. It
Neug (01:53)
Still dark, right?
Franky (01:54)
is dark, dark. And you know I'm out here in the cut, so there are no street lights, no, you know, nothing.
So I'm out there wearing my headlamp and my protective gear and all that other good stuff. But I went out there yesterday. Thirty-six degrees.
Neug (02:10)
Duh.
Franky (02:11)
Yeah, but it was good. I mean, you know, I c like I said, I can I can deal with that temperature and still wear shorts as long as I've got like a hoodie or a long sleeve something on and something on my head, since I don't exactly have natural covering for my head anymore.
But it does
Neug (02:24)
Indeed.
Franky (02:25)
does make me glad that I started growing out this beard to keep that cutting wind off my face a little bit.
Neug (02:31)
Yeah, man. I see you wearing that beer, wearing it well.
Franky (02:33)
Tr trying to keep up with your your your fantastic beard over there, Mr. Neug
Neug (02:38)
Appreciate it. I've been growing it for a little while and you'll see if you keep that beard growing. You know, when I first started, my beard was more pepper than it was salt. You know, people talk about the salt and pepper.
Franky (02:49)
Mm.
Neug (02:49)
And of course, as you see, I'm a little bit more salt than I am pepper, but surprisingly people compliment on the salt and pepper. so I don't let it get next to me, but I like it, and you're wearing yours well, so something about the bald hair in the beard, I think.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Franky (03:05)
Well I'm saying
if we if we can't grow hair hair on our head, at least we can grow it on our face. So we'll we gotta gotta have a foot in the game somehow.
Neug (03:10)
There you go. I'm with that. I'm with that.
Franky (03:15)
So, you know, as for me and my usual check in, things are moving at breakneck speed as always in my house, quiet and slow, rarely live here. They may visit from time to time, but with you know, the wife, the the kids, even though one of 'em's in college and you know, the other's here still, things are always moving, but it's it's been a good week.
My dad was recently in the hospital and he's home now. He's doing much better. he's got a good report.
Neug (03:42)
Awesome.
Franky (03:42)
So that's a stressor that has definitely been lifted off my shoulders and I'm, thoroughly grateful for that. But it's changing things. I've mentioned it before. It's it's it's interesting when you have to when you have to watch your parents getting older. it's beautiful to be able to go through it with them, but at the same time it's still tough. So
I know our I know there are people out there in our audience who can empathize with that.
Neug (04:03)
Absolutely. Absolutely. Well make sure you tell Dad hello from everybody here at the PSI Effect Podcasts.
Franky (04:10)
I shall.
Neug (04:10)
And let's just get on into it. You know, our our topic is about trick-or-treat and you know surprises. And I have a question for you and for the audience. When was the last time you actually let something surprise you?
Franky (04:24)
Mm.
Wow. You know, I don't like surprises, Neug I I think I I think I'll I think I'll go ahead and say it.
I I don't like surprises. Like, you know, there have been times when my wife has organized like a a surprise birthday party or something like that. And while I'm very immensely appreciative and grateful, I don't know what it is. I don't like surprises because it feels like I've missed something that I should have picked up on.
And maybe that I mean, you know, that I I fully recognize that that's something internal to me that, you know, I just got to deal with. But that's that's kind of my stance on surprises. But I did have a surprise this past weekend that I'll I'll I'll share, but I wanna hear from you first.
Neug (05:04)
Well I was gonna say, you know, that that your story is is is one context, but the other could be something you know it could be an event or it could be a movie, it could be some music, it could be a restaurant, you know, any number of things that could surprise you. And and one of the things for me, and I know I've mentioned this movie before, was the peanut butter falcon.
Franky (05:29)
Mm.
Neug (05:30)
And
You know, when I came across that movie, it wasn't that I saw a trailer, it wasn't that somebody told me about it. I was just, you know, looking for something to watch one day and that popped up and I was like, Hmm, peanut butter falcon. And right away I thought about a movie I've seen before, which was the the Falcon and the Snowman, which is an old espionage type movie, which is one of the types of movies that I like. And
Franky (05:51)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (05:52)
so I said, you know, let me settle in. It's gotta be funny 'cause they're talking about peanut butter, right? And so, you know, it it really surprised me.
the the storyline about a young man named Zach with Down syndrome and you know how he wanted to be a professional wrestler and he was not gonna be denied. And so I was pleasantly surprised by that, right? I I I didn't really go into it with a true expectation, but I was pleasantly surprised at at the movie itself and and the outcome and the storyline and all of that. So I mean it doesn't necessarily have to be your surprise doesn't necessarily have to be in a trick or treat bag or
necessarily you know a specific situation but there's there's countless situations that you can you can come across that that could surprise you
Franky (06:36)
Yeah, for sure. I mean, but when surprises
are in a trick-or-cheat bag, they are quite nice. It's been a long time since I've been able to go trick-or-cheating. you know, I think I've kind of aged out of that, but it's been nice to, you know, be able to do that with the boys as they've grown up and everything. but for me, the the surprise came this past Saturday. So by the time this episode releases
I will have run that trail half marathon that I've been training for and that I've mentioned a couple of times on the podcast. So this past Saturday from when we're recording was my last long training run. And I knew the weather was gonna be dicey. So I decided to go into a weather forecast bubble to not consume any information to see what the weather was gonna be like or any of that stuff. I was just gonna wake up.
And whatever I got, I was gonna roll with. So this past Saturday, I had to run 11 miles out in the trail early morning. It was about 45 degrees and pouring rain the entire time. So it that the weather itself was a surprise. But much to my surprise, despite the weather.
I actually really enjoyed being out there, you know, in out in the woods on the trail, getting that run in, and I had one of the best run times you know, on the clock that I had for any of my training runs. So that was a pleasant surprise that I did not expect under such conditions.
Neug (08:04)
Well, God bless you for doing that, sir. But that's a great segue into where we're going next, which is, you know, when you have these surprises and you're anticipating things like are you are you exp are you going on someone else's experience? Right? Is that what's helping you build the expectation of what's about to happen? or are you
you know, looking at it from your own lens.
Franky (08:31)
It can be difficult nowadays to be able to have an uninfluenced lens that you're looking through to interpret anything. and what I'm really speaking to here is just, you know, the information age that we're living in makes it hard to not have information flowing into your feed, flowing on you to your television, onto you know, onto your smartphone, whatever the case may be. There's so many ways that information comes to us. It's very difficult to keep a clean lens.
when going into something. Whether like you said, whether it's a movie, whether it's a a restaurant or some you know, concert, some other experience. Let's let's be real. Relationships. Sometimes there are surprises in relationships that we can encounter and and sometimes we actively try our best to do some sleuthing and you know googling folks and try to find all their background before we even meet so that we're not surprised.
Neug (09:28)
Yeah, we definitely do that. And you know, you talk about relationships, sometimes we take recommendations from
Neug (09:33)
that we really know and and care about, right? And you know, we don't we've never had the experience, but someone else has, and we just do it on their recommendation. And and then we just have to go with it and see what happens, right? We may like it, we may not. but sometimes that recommendation carries quite a bit quite a bit of weight, right?
Franky (09:58)
W with that real quick though, yeah are there any are there any prerequisites for when we take that that recommendation? I mean, are you gonna take just anybody's recommendation or is there certain on a certain amount of information that has to be included in that recommendation for you to just act on it?
Neug (10:13)
Well, I think it has to first of all be somebody that you know, right? 'Cause
Franky (10:17)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (10:17)
somebody that you don't know that's giving you a recommendation on something, you could easily just, you know, blow that off as, you know, somebody's just giving you s information. But if somebody you know well is giving you a recommendation on a specific event or restaurant or what have you
you're probably gonna put a little bit more stock into that because it's somebody that you, you know, have some things in common with or somebody that maybe you've spent some time with in the past. So I think it makes a big difference, as to who's making the recommendation and and what it's all about, right? 'Cause it might be a recommendation for something that you just have no interest in. So I think it just really depends on
that type of of whatever the s that scenario might might might be.
Franky (11:01)
Does that recommendation for for you, just speaking for you, does that recommendation then make you feel like you don't need to do all this background information information gathering and detective work to find out about the thing?
Neug (11:13)
You know, it may, depending on what it is. So somebody's telling me, you know, check out this restaurant, you know, me being someone who enjoys food
I might check out the restaurant just to see what type of restaurant it is, what kind of food items they have and so forth. and even if I see some things that I might be a little bit unsure of, I probably would take that recommendation anyway. You know, just speaking, for instance, let's say that was coming from you on a particular restaurant. You know, I would probably do the I will probably have that experience anyway because it's coming from you. But somebody that I know less so, and you know, I make that same
investigation on that particular restaurant, I may not if I see some things that I really don't necessarily wanna wanna experience.
Franky (11:56)
Say for me, you know, yes, who I take the recommendation from, very much like you described, depends on, you know, who it is, what kind of relationship we have, how well they know me, how well I know them. But even even if it's somebody that's really close, a lot of times that recommendation is going to be what triggers my, inspector gadget, investigation mode over here, trying
Neug (12:14)
Mm.
Franky (12:16)
to figure out all the stuff that's going on. And I find that, you know, if somebody just says, you know, just go check it out.
The older that I've got, the older I get, you know, the more birthdays I get to celebrate, the more times I go around the sun, the less tolerant I am of that vague information, right? That that triggers me to, you know, start asking my questions. Like, all right, so, you know, what time do I need to get there? You know, what's the attire? Or here here's the question that you hear, you know, folks my age say all the time: who all's gonna be there?
So it just triggers ev regardless of who it comes from, those are the things that get triggered for me.
Neug (12:51)
Yeah, so you know, you that brings us to you know, acknowledging what's what's involved, right, with this with this event that we might take on. you know, you mentioned what time you need to get there. You might ask yourself, well, how much is it gonna cost me? You
Franky (13:08)
Mm.
Neug (13:09)
know, it may not it may not be a a a free event, right?
You know, how much how much of me is it really gonna take? How much energy am I gonna have to exp expend, you know, to do this? You know, like for instance, if you were to invite me to go on this run, I would know that I would need to really expend a great deal of energy to keep up with you
Franky (13:29)
Yeah.
Neug (13:30)
on said eleven mile run. But you know, those are some things that we really start to consider and
you know, if it's something that you've never done before or something that you haven't done in a long time, I think you might be more apt to dig in and get some more answers to some questions before you really fully commit to what might be happening. And you know, in that, are you do you shortchange yourself on the surprise? Do you shortchange
Franky (14:01)
Yeah.
Neug (14:02)
yourself on the experience by knowing so much ahead of time? Maybe.
Franky (14:05)
Hmm. Yeah. I mean you're you're almost it's almost like you're building the experience before you get there. And, you know, I I liken that to if we have too much information going in, I liken that to going to see a movie about a book that's that that's based on a book that you've read. You
Neug (14:24)
Mm.
Franky (14:25)
know, inevitably they're going, you know, because you've already got this
this experience that you've had that you've created by reading the book, but then when you go to see the movie, obviously there's going to be some dramatic liberty taken. It's not going to be exactly true to canon and there are going to be differences. So that's that's how I see that we're we're building the experience before we have it. It's that feeling. Because I know many times if I go to see a movie like that, I feel let down because, you know, my imagination created the world of the book much differently than the movie producers did.
Neug (14:56)
Yeah, and I think that's true through that has been true throughout time because how often have you heard that well the book was much better than the movie? I mean you you hear that
Franky (15:04)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (15:05)
you hear that so many times.
Franky (15:07)
Yeah.
Neug (15:07)
And you know, I guess I think the other thing that I want to bring up as we're talking about this and what it costs is you know, if you have to spend money on something,
Franky (15:17)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (15:18)
and if you have to spend a good deal of energy on something
I can imagine that, you know, at least for me and and and I'm imagining that folks in the audience too, is like, Well if I gotta spend this much on it, it better be worth it. Right.
Franky (15:32)
for sure. For sure. I mean, you know, spending the money, you know, you find you're asking about how much does it cost, you know, and then all right, if it does cost this much, what other information can I gather that can save me from not only having to feel like I wasted my money, but just having a bad experience overall? Like what what are the things that I need to know?
Neug (15:53)
Yeah, I mean, 'cause you wanna make you wanna make the right choice for you, right? Either way. and certainly, I mean, if you have others that you're bringing along with you, you wanna make sure that they have a good experience too, if it's something that it's it's a it's a group if it's a group e event or or something that involves, you know, more than just yourself. but then what happens if the event what if you go and it's an event or or a restaurant or whatever
And the experience is like, it's pretty good, but others who were telling you about this or the recommendations build it up to be like this fantastic experience.
Franky (16:34)
Hm. So the the preconceived notions are kind of following us through the whole evening and interfering with our ability to be present in the moment.
Neug (16:44)
Yeah, absolutely. And and is pretty good okay. Is is that enough for certain experiences?
Franky (16:51)
I mean, I guess it can be. I mean, again, it depends on the amount of investment, right? At least from from my perspective. So, you know, we're talking about experiences like, you know, going to the movies, going out to a fancy dinner, going to, you know, a nice bar, taking a big vacation. yeah, the the more money I spend on something, the higher my level of expectation is gonna be, or the more investment I had to make in preparing and planning for whatever the excursion is.
The higher my expectations are gonna be. In the relationship realm, let's not forget that this applies there too. You know, the more I've invested in the relationship and and everything, the more that I kind of expect out of it. You know, with the I don't necess I don't necessarily wanna say reciprocity, but you know, there can be expectations. Like, all right, I'm investing in this relationship. I need you to meet me at least halfway.
Neug (17:42)
For sure. And, you know, I th that that relational aspect has to do also with with work, right? You're taking on a a new role, a new position. I mean, there's certain things that you expect the the employer to e to meet you on, right? It it it is, you know, even though you're getting paid f to do what you're doing on that job, it is somewhat a a partnership, right? 'Cause you agree to do certain things and the employer agrees to do certain things and
You know, you you do expect that
there's some level of trust, you know, that you're both gonna get out of it what you what you want, right? I'm
Franky (18:21)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (18:21)
not saying that you're gonna be necessarily surprised, although you could be, right? You could take a position and you were unsure of it, and then it turns out to be one of the greatest positions that you ever had, right? So I mean you can be surprised and pleasantly so in that situation. And and with that I will say
you know, surprises are not always on the pleasant side of the spectrum, right? that surprise can be off of a negative experience as well. So, you know, this this whole surprise spectrum cuts both ways.
Franky (18:54)
Mm.
Neug (18:54)
And and when you think about it, go back to whole trick or treat, you when you get home and you got that bag of candy and you got some things in there that you really didn't like, right? You really don't like that kind of candy. Like one thing for me was like
It was like black licorice, man. I never did like black licorice. However, being in a neighborhood and and having siblings, you know, the nice thing was you could always trade. You could always trade off, right?
Franky (19:16)
Sure.
Neug (19:18)
but in some situations, you know, that trade is just not is not available to you.
Franky (19:22)
Man, that was one of the best parts about Halloween. when you got, go trick-or-treating and you'd you come back home, whether you had a real trick-or-treat bag or you're just using a pillowcase, one of the best part, you know, because you
Neug (19:31)
Right.
Franky (19:34)
know, as you're going from house to house, you're not exactly seeing everything that's going into the bag. Cause let's be real, with the masks and stuff we used to wear back in the day, you couldn't see a damn thing out of those things anyway, right?
Neug (19:44)
That's right. That's right.
Franky (19:47)
So you're not even seeing what you get in until you get home. So you know, you dump it all out on the floor and you see the stash. But like you said, you mentioned black licorice. There was a candy that that used to be pretty ubiquitous. Root beer barrels. It was like
Neug (20:02)
Mm.
Franky (20:02)
a it was like a hard candy shaped like a barrel and was supposed to be like root beer flavor. my gosh. it was it was rough. But yeah,
Neug (20:08)
Yep. You trade those quick, huh?
Franky (20:14)
man, yeah, trade straight to the trash.
Neug (20:16)
Ha ha ha ha.
Franky (20:18)
Straight to the trash. But I mean, you know, you you had expectations like, man, you know, I went to this house, and maybe I sh hopefully I got a full-size candy bar here. But then you find things like, this is something inside of a Ziploc bag that somebody made some Rice Krispie treats, or somebody, you know, popped some popcorn and portioned it out into things. There'll be so there's always going to be some surprises in there. Some of those surprises, like I said, are like you said, are aren't aren't necessarily positive things. Like, this looks like
An apple that's got some bad spots on it. Or this apple looks like it's been cut. We can't use this. So there's yeah, I'm with ya.
Neug (20:51)
Yeah, so there's some things that catch you off guard, right? But in a good way. Right? They catch you off guard in in one of the best possible ways. And and so I think about you know being in a situation where you did something that you, you know, maybe you were a little apprehensive about or you weren't sure if you're gonna like it, and then you just turn out to really like it. You really loved
Franky (21:11)
Yeah.
Neug (21:11)
it, you enjoyed it, right?
Neug (21:12)
You know, and it reminds me of when I lived in Wisconsin, I had some friends who liked to camp, right? I did more camping when I lived there than I have in a long time. And one of the things that we did was, you know
We rented a houseboat and I was as hey man let's let's go on this weekend and it was a long weekend was a holiday weekend let's go rent this
Franky (21:32)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (21:33)
houseboat on the Mississippi
Franky (21:35)
wow.
Neug (21:35)
and I was like you know I didn't grow up camping I didn't grow up boating I you know none of that I'm like now you want me to go out on a houseboat on the Mississippi River? Okay so I was a little apprehensive right because it was just something experience that I had no knowledge of
And so we go out there and we rent this houseboat. and it ended up being a really good time. Like here we are, there must have been, I don't know, a dozen of us on this houseboat. And we're just cruising up the Mississippi River. You find the sandbar, you run up on the sandbar, you get out, you have lunch, and and so it just turned out to be a really, really good experience. The weather wasn't the greatest, but it wasn't that bad.
But it was an experience that I really enjoyed and I and you know it it left a positive impression on me about you know just going with the flow and
Franky (22:25)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (22:25)
and seeing what happens, right? And it turned out to be a really good experience. And so you can have experiences like that where you're not really sure, but you do it anyway, and you know, years later, it's still a very pleasant memory.
Franky (22:40)
Interesting. What about that particular opportunity almost made you say no?
Neug (22:47)
Well, like I said, you know, camping was not something I did growing up. It was just not something that my family did. You know, I grew up in the city. And boating was definitely something that I didn't do. And just the idea of being on a houseboat, you know, that was boating was foreign enough, but being on a houseboat was, you know, kind of over the top for me and and just not having any experience with it.
I was like, you know, I'm not sure I really want to do this. But
Franky (23:17)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (23:17)
you know, I I I I got past it and just did it anyway. And I think it was just really just the the unknown, right? Something that I was not familiar with that, you know, put me on that spectrum of, you know, maybe I don't really want to do this. And then once I got out there, I really enjoyed it. And it was really fun because there was a point in time where I actually drove the houseboat.
Franky (23:41)
snap.
Okay.
Neug (23:42)
because we didn't have guide or anything. W it was just the people who were on the camping trip, so we all took turns to drive and this and that and let me just tell you, if you've never parallel parked a hospital.
It is an experience, to say the least.
Franky (23:55)
Mm.
Okay. I I have to say that's not on my bingo card, but okay.
Neug (24:01)
Yeah.
yeah, it w it was fun. So yeah. So sometimes I guess you have to step out of your comfort zone and and and see what happens.
Franky (24:08)
for sure. I mean, for the thing that sticks out, you know, just blindingly bright for me in this case is doing a tough mudder for the first time. You know, I've talked about
Neug (24:18)
Mm.
Franky (24:19)
these obstacle course races and all this other stuff. So the experience, you know, I was I was like, I don't know if I'm gonna like this, but it turned out
you know, it definitely scratched that itch and I just fell in love with the n whole notion of obstacle course racing and it the way it came about is was was interesting because you know, I wasn't very healthy at the time and a coworker of mine, he he wasn't very healthy either. You know, he was about, you know, three hundred and fifty pounds looking like a, you know, looking like Kenny Rogers and I was about three hundred and ten pounds, you know, looking like a butterbean. And we just started walking at work and then
Walking became walking and running, and then it became running. So we ran some short races. And then he was like, you know, this guy is also, you know, about 15 years my senior. And he's like, Look at this thing. Let's do this tough mudder. And when I looked at it, it's like, yeah, it's gonna be, 10 to 12 miles. It's gonna be on on a ski resort. So you're going up and down these slopes. But I was like, okay. But the thing that that
Neug (25:18)
Mm. Mm.
Franky (25:20)
most that came closest to making me say no.
Is that you effectively have to sign a death waiver to be able to participate in the event. It's like, all right, if you come out here and
Neug (25:29)
Wow.
Franky (25:29)
you die, you can't sue us and none of your people can sue us either. Be
Neug (25:34)
wow.
Franky (25:34)
warned. But I did it anyway, you know, and I don't think my wife was too happy about it at the time. But I'm I'm still standing and we're still together, most importantly. But yeah, I didn't think I was gonna I didn't think I was gonna enjoy that experience, but I was gonna I was willing to try to push myself and
Yeah, it came something that I just can't get enough of.
Neug (25:54)
Do you think that y the younger you, like a younger version of you, would have gone out on a tough mudder? I mean, clearly you would have been in different shape than you just described.
Franky (26:06)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (26:07)
but do you think that that was be something that you would have done or did you would you think that that was just you know, just like a a a crazy thing to think about?
Franky (26:16)
I
w the younger me would have would not have even blinked and just jumped down there. that you know, that would have definitely in my wheelhouse 'cause, much unlike you, I grew up out here in the country, so my play area was the woods, running through trails, you know, climbing all sorts of stuff and it that was just my element. So I think I would have been less impeded in my decision to do it when I was younger.
Neug (26:43)
Gotcha.
All right, well, tough mudder. I know that you've mentioned it to me and that that definitely, sir, would take some research on my part.
Franky (26:52)
I am still audience, I'm gonna have to talk to you a little bit here. Audience, I am still a little salty with y'all because you didn't come through for me. Because there was a you know, we put out the call to action to get Neug to do a tough mudder or some kind of obstacle course race with me, and all you guys had to do was comment. For the people that did, thank you.
Neug (27:13)
Well, I was
gonna say there were some PSI faithful who who did comment, so I wanna give them a shout out.
Franky (27:19)
Yes, but come on, y'all. Don't let me down again.
Neug (27:24)
So when it comes to the tough mudder, you I think I need to pause. Right? I need to take a pause.
Franky (27:27)
Okay, let's break it down. Mm-hmm.
Neug (27:31)
And, you know, I mean, haven't really decided that it's something I'm gonna do. I don't have any preconceived expectations. If I decide to do that, right? I just, you know, I don't know anything about it. So in my pause, I need to just evaluate here, you know.
what my expectation might be and just what tough mudder actually is. I've seen some pictures, but I really haven't dug into it. So you know, and then just decide for myself if it's really something that I want to do.
So that pause phase for this whole episode, you know, we're using tough mudder as an example, but you know, in every situation, you make that pause and you make some observations about current state in which you might be jumping into.
So Franky, given that scenario, tell us about, you know, how how would we shift into like like like what would the shift look like for me, for instance, if you were someone like me trying to decide about this this tough mudder?
Franky (28:36)
Sure.
I mean, you know, after you've taken that pause and you've really reflected on it, the shift happens when you really come to the conclusion of, or you really have the realization of what do I need to discover for myself? There's all these things that I have preconceived notions about or I've heard recommendations about. Well, you shift when you start that discovery process on your own and you go out and you seek the information that you need. What matters to the most to you about the experience?
You know, the mud, the barbed wire, the fire, the underwater cage. I mean I'm not doing a good job in selling you on this right now, am I?
Neug (29:15)
You y you are not sir, although I will say, I will
say that, you know, you're not truly frightening me either because you gotta remember that, you know, I was in basic training and so you know for the US Army. And so a lot of what you're talking about are things that I probably have done, or at least to
Franky (29:35)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (29:35)
some degree, and so it doesn't frighten me more so than, you know.
Am I gonna get, you know, my old big behind out there and do it?
Franky (29:46)
Sure.
Sure. Well, I think that means the most important question that you have to ask during the shift when you're trying to figure out what are the things you need to discover for yourself. You have to be honest when you ask yourself, does the person who's recommending this to me enjoy the same things that I do? And will I experience this thing differently than they do? And I think, you know, in this particular example, I think that's those are probably the two most paramount questions.
Neug (30:12)
Well, yeah, and my and one of my considerations would be, you know, can I actually finish this thing? 'Cause I you know, being somewhat competitive, I don't want to go out there and not finish it. and you know, and then the whole idea of signing this waiver that, you know, if I died and I'm just dead, that's a whole nother thing. However, if I ignite or if I s step into the ignition part of this, I think the big thing would be is
if I you know just skip past all of those nuances and just you know pay the money for the race and just you know start training for it.
Franky (30:54)
Yeah, leaving something open. That's where the ignition is. It's like, all right, well, I'm I'm not c fully closing myself off to this. And this is not to say that, you know, you have to you have to acquiesce to doing the thing or spending time with the person or going to see the movie. It doesn't necessarily mean you always have to follow through that, but you know, leave something open. It's like, okay, well, maybe there's an opportunity.
Neug (31:20)
Yeah. And so then it brings us back to the original question, like when was the last time you let something surprise you? And so I think that you and I have given some examples of you know what
types of events in our life or what types of situations that might bring a surprise. We talked about relationships, we talked about movies, we talked about excursions, and certainly, you know, there's, you know, food and restaurants and so forth. So there's a lot of different scenarios. And we even talked about employment. So there's a lot of different scenarios which could put you in a situation to be surprised. But ask yourself when was the last time that you allowed yourself
you know, to to to be surprised.
Franky (32:00)
Yeah. I mean, and it's not an all or nothing type of equation either, where it's like, okay, well, I'm I'm fully known or I f I'm fully aware of everything or I'm just totally surprised and don't know anything. There's there's a happy medium in there somewhere. my wife and I were talking about this the other day, and one of the things where that kind of falls into that happy medium category for us is I know we're talking about Halloween, but you know, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving dinner. Who comes?
You know, hey, it that guest list can be as open as we need it to be. But what's on the menu? No, no, sir. No,
Neug (32:34)
Ha ha ha.
Franky (32:35)
sir. That menu is non negotiable. I have to know we we have to know who's bringing what. And I'm sure y people have seen these viral memes on on social media. And I agree with them that Thanksgiving is not the time to be experimenting with re recipes that you found online.
Neug (32:54)
You know, that part is true and let me just say knowing what I know about, you know, the folks who show up with food to to to your house or to your event, I just bring a healthy appetite and I think I'll be fine.
Franky (33:08)
And some stretchy pants.
Neug (33:13)
Yeah, so and I and and that just brings me to another question. Like what what what pleasant surprise or what what surprise would you have experienced or would you have missed out on if you didn't have all of the facts and all of the information ahead of time? You know, you mentioned earlier that we live in this time where we have
the internet and we have Google and we have AI and we have all of these tools where we can get information. You know, think back a few years, not that long ago,
Franky (33:45)
Mm.
Neug (33:46)
especially for some of our younger listeners, where we didn't have all that. And if you wanted to go and experience something, maybe you got past a flyer or a pamphlet from someone explaining about this excursion or what have you.
But you didn't have the tools to go and do a bunch of investigative work and certainly not be able to get information in a matter of minutes or a matter of seconds toward something. You just had to experience it. You just had to go. And if you didn't like it, you didn't like it. And if you liked it, you liked it, right? And so, you know, what what would you miss out on if you
didn't expend the energy to research it to the nth degree, right? You gotta ask yourself that.
Franky (34:35)
Yeah, is the juice worth the squeeze? Yeah.
Neug (34:37)
Is the juice worth the squeeze?
Franky (34:39)
You know, is it is it really worth putting in all this effort? I mean, with all the effort that you put in, you could have just gone and experienced it and learned it for yourself rather than leaning on all the information or let's be real, misinformation that you might
Neug (34:51)
Correct.
Franky (34:52)
be consuming. You know, hey, myth misinformation is the fifth horseman of the apocalypse, you best believe.
Neug (34:58)
Mm.
Franky (34:59)
It's not just four.
Neug (35:00)
like that we'll we'll we'll use that down the road somewhere and you know with that misinformation you could easily talk yourself out of a really good experience so
Franky (35:09)
For sure.
Neug (35:10)
consider everything that we have given you today I think that it's been a a good conversation Franky is always a good conversation talking through things with you and and learning some things you know root beer barrels and and and the like really appreciate that
And so before we get out of here, folks, we we we want to tell you how you can find us on the PSI Effect Podcast. Hopefully you've enjoyed this episode as much as we have. And I'm gonna let Franky take it from here and let you know where you can find us.
Franky (35:38)
Yeah, well before I jump into that Neug what are you doing for Halloween?
Neug (35:42)
probably not a whole lot. I don't have any events that I'm going to. I might, you know, cruise through the neighborhood and look at some of the decorations that folks have have put up 'cause I can tell you, you know, I've lived out here for a few years and it seems like every year folks their their decorations seem to expand.
Franky (36:01)
Mm.
Neug (36:02)
and so
I'll probably do something like that and you know, maybe pass out a few root beer barrels or whatever else I can find.
Franky (36:10)
you trying to get your house vandalized.
Neug (36:13)
Hey, listen, let me just tell the audience: I got a friend who growing up, him and his family would they would think of things throughout the year that they could do that were definitely tricks. They were not treats. Okay. One year they gave out batteries, one year they gave out tea bags.
Another year they got these little cups and they put cauliflower in So they were they were after, you know, what could they do for the trick? And it seems like the folks in the neighborhood always looked forward to coming to their house because they never knew what they were going to
Franky (36:45)
Oof.
Neug (36:46)
That's wild.
Franky (36:47)
Yeah, that that that is that is wild. Wow. Okay. Yeah, I'm not mad at that. Well,
Neug (36:53)
I won't be doing that though, Franky.
Franky (36:54)
okay. Okay. Like I said, I don't want your house getting vandalized. You know, these kids nowadays are they
Neug (36:58)
I don't want to do
Franky (36:58)
they're built different.
Neug (37:01)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Franky (37:03)
man. But yeah, we'll probably you know, obviously where I live we don't get trick or treaters 'cause we're just sitting such a rural space. But my younger son and I will probably head out to a local neighborhood where some of his friends from school live and walk the neighborhood there. It'll be a it'll be an opportunity for me to try out by, you know, some of my what I I think I've talked about it before, my my little hobby of crafting and things like that. So I've made a costume.
to try out this year. So maybe if things go well I'll we'll share some photos with the with the audience and some of our social media feeds too.
Neug (37:37)
I think we should. We're gonna hold you to that, sir.
Franky (37:40)
All right. Well, if we're going to share those photos with you from Halloween, you got to know exactly where to find us. So for anything PSI effect podcast related, go to our website. This is PSIpod.com. There you'll find all of the episodes. And man, I was looking the other day. That library is getting pretty big. So that there's plenty of content to consume. Go out there and check out some of those older episodes, especially if you haven't been able to partake of them in real time.
We are on Spotify, Amazon, Apple Podcasts. you name it, we're out there. So find us on your favorite podcast platform and subscribe. Get those automatic downloads going. We also do video of every episode, and that is on YouTube. You can find us by searching the PSI Effect Podcast or use our handle at this is PSI Pod, which is also our handle for social media: Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube Shorts, at
This is PSI Pod. Keep those comments coming.
Neug (38:39)
Perfect. Yes, we do welcome your comments and we we do challenge you to let us know how you're you're doing and some of the challenges that we put forth each week. We'd love to talk about that in the comment section, so make sure you do that. And so, you know, with that, we're gonna get out of here. We really appreciate you. Just remember that setbacks are temporary and comebacks are indeed legendary. Until next time, go out there and be brave and rise on purpose.
Hello everybody, welcome back to the PSI Effect Podcast. I am Neug and I'm here with Franky. We are your host in this space, and today we're going to be talking about trick-or-treat, you know, since it's Halloween. However, we're not going to be talking about trick-or-treat in the way that you might think. We're
Franky (00:42)
Yeah.
Neug (00:43)
going to be talking about how you may be spoiling your surprise.
Franky (00:48)
All right.
Neug (00:48)
But before we do, I'd like to welcome all of our seasoned listeners as well as our newcomers. We'd like to invite you to go to your social spaces and like our content and subscribe to our shows. We really appreciate that. It helps push the push us up through the algorithm and helps other people find us. So we really appreciate your help there. Before we get any further, we always like to check in with Franky to see what's going on. But before we do, I want to say, Franky, this weather
Fall is really coming in because
Franky (01:17)
Yes.
Neug (01:19)
I went out yesterday for my walk in the early morning and it was like forty degrees, brother. And I'm like, it seemed like three weeks ago I was going out early in the morning and it was like seventy, almost eighty degrees. So fall has really jumped on in here quick.
Franky (01:33)
Mm-hmm.
It's coming. this is this is my this is my kind of weather. I love this ice cold weather, keeping it ice cold out there. And, I've been getting up a little bit earlier this week, getting out for some of my runs. So I'm out there, maybe five, five fifteen in the morning. And well, I can't even say it's morning because it's still nighttime outside. It
Neug (01:53)
Still dark, right?
Franky (01:54)
is dark, dark. And you know I'm out here in the cut, so there are no street lights, no, you know, nothing.
So I'm out there wearing my headlamp and my protective gear and all that other good stuff. But I went out there yesterday. Thirty-six degrees.
Neug (02:10)
Duh.
Franky (02:11)
Yeah, but it was good. I mean, you know, I c like I said, I can I can deal with that temperature and still wear shorts as long as I've got like a hoodie or a long sleeve something on and something on my head, since I don't exactly have natural covering for my head anymore.
But it does
Neug (02:24)
Indeed.
Franky (02:25)
does make me glad that I started growing out this beard to keep that cutting wind off my face a little bit.
Neug (02:31)
Yeah, man. I see you wearing that beer, wearing it well.
Franky (02:33)
Tr trying to keep up with your your your fantastic beard over there, Mr. Neug
Neug (02:38)
Appreciate it. I've been growing it for a little while and you'll see if you keep that beard growing. You know, when I first started, my beard was more pepper than it was salt. You know, people talk about the salt and pepper.
Franky (02:49)
Mm.
Neug (02:49)
And of course, as you see, I'm a little bit more salt than I am pepper, but surprisingly people compliment on the salt and pepper. so I don't let it get next to me, but I like it, and you're wearing yours well, so something about the bald hair in the beard, I think.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Franky (03:05)
Well I'm saying
if we if we can't grow hair hair on our head, at least we can grow it on our face. So we'll we gotta gotta have a foot in the game somehow.
Neug (03:10)
There you go. I'm with that. I'm with that.
Franky (03:15)
So, you know, as for me and my usual check in, things are moving at breakneck speed as always in my house, quiet and slow, rarely live here. They may visit from time to time, but with you know, the wife, the the kids, even though one of 'em's in college and you know, the other's here still, things are always moving, but it's it's been a good week.
My dad was recently in the hospital and he's home now. He's doing much better. he's got a good report.
Neug (03:42)
Awesome.
Franky (03:42)
So that's a stressor that has definitely been lifted off my shoulders and I'm, thoroughly grateful for that. But it's changing things. I've mentioned it before. It's it's it's interesting when you have to when you have to watch your parents getting older. it's beautiful to be able to go through it with them, but at the same time it's still tough. So
I know our I know there are people out there in our audience who can empathize with that.
Neug (04:03)
Absolutely. Absolutely. Well make sure you tell Dad hello from everybody here at the PSI Effect Podcasts.
Franky (04:10)
I shall.
Neug (04:10)
And let's just get on into it. You know, our our topic is about trick-or-treat and you know surprises. And I have a question for you and for the audience. When was the last time you actually let something surprise you?
Franky (04:24)
Mm.
Wow. You know, I don't like surprises, Neug I I think I I think I'll I think I'll go ahead and say it.
I I don't like surprises. Like, you know, there have been times when my wife has organized like a a surprise birthday party or something like that. And while I'm very immensely appreciative and grateful, I don't know what it is. I don't like surprises because it feels like I've missed something that I should have picked up on.
And maybe that I mean, you know, that I I fully recognize that that's something internal to me that, you know, I just got to deal with. But that's that's kind of my stance on surprises. But I did have a surprise this past weekend that I'll I'll I'll share, but I wanna hear from you first.
Neug (05:04)
Well I was gonna say, you know, that that your story is is is one context, but the other could be something you know it could be an event or it could be a movie, it could be some music, it could be a restaurant, you know, any number of things that could surprise you. And and one of the things for me, and I know I've mentioned this movie before, was the peanut butter falcon.
Franky (05:29)
Mm.
Neug (05:30)
And
You know, when I came across that movie, it wasn't that I saw a trailer, it wasn't that somebody told me about it. I was just, you know, looking for something to watch one day and that popped up and I was like, Hmm, peanut butter falcon. And right away I thought about a movie I've seen before, which was the the Falcon and the Snowman, which is an old espionage type movie, which is one of the types of movies that I like. And
Franky (05:51)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (05:52)
so I said, you know, let me settle in. It's gotta be funny 'cause they're talking about peanut butter, right? And so, you know, it it really surprised me.
the the storyline about a young man named Zach with Down syndrome and you know how he wanted to be a professional wrestler and he was not gonna be denied. And so I was pleasantly surprised by that, right? I I I didn't really go into it with a true expectation, but I was pleasantly surprised at at the movie itself and and the outcome and the storyline and all of that. So I mean it doesn't necessarily have to be your surprise doesn't necessarily have to be in a trick or treat bag or
necessarily you know a specific situation but there's there's countless situations that you can you can come across that that could surprise you
Franky (06:36)
Yeah, for sure. I mean, but when surprises
are in a trick-or-cheat bag, they are quite nice. It's been a long time since I've been able to go trick-or-cheating. you know, I think I've kind of aged out of that, but it's been nice to, you know, be able to do that with the boys as they've grown up and everything. but for me, the the surprise came this past Saturday. So by the time this episode releases
I will have run that trail half marathon that I've been training for and that I've mentioned a couple of times on the podcast. So this past Saturday from when we're recording was my last long training run. And I knew the weather was gonna be dicey. So I decided to go into a weather forecast bubble to not consume any information to see what the weather was gonna be like or any of that stuff. I was just gonna wake up.
And whatever I got, I was gonna roll with. So this past Saturday, I had to run 11 miles out in the trail early morning. It was about 45 degrees and pouring rain the entire time. So it that the weather itself was a surprise. But much to my surprise, despite the weather.
I actually really enjoyed being out there, you know, in out in the woods on the trail, getting that run in, and I had one of the best run times you know, on the clock that I had for any of my training runs. So that was a pleasant surprise that I did not expect under such conditions.
Neug (08:04)
Well, God bless you for doing that, sir. But that's a great segue into where we're going next, which is, you know, when you have these surprises and you're anticipating things like are you are you exp are you going on someone else's experience? Right? Is that what's helping you build the expectation of what's about to happen? or are you
you know, looking at it from your own lens.
Franky (08:31)
It can be difficult nowadays to be able to have an uninfluenced lens that you're looking through to interpret anything. and what I'm really speaking to here is just, you know, the information age that we're living in makes it hard to not have information flowing into your feed, flowing on you to your television, onto you know, onto your smartphone, whatever the case may be. There's so many ways that information comes to us. It's very difficult to keep a clean lens.
when going into something. Whether like you said, whether it's a movie, whether it's a a restaurant or some you know, concert, some other experience. Let's let's be real. Relationships. Sometimes there are surprises in relationships that we can encounter and and sometimes we actively try our best to do some sleuthing and you know googling folks and try to find all their background before we even meet so that we're not surprised.
Neug (09:28)
Yeah, we definitely do that. And you know, you talk about relationships, sometimes we take recommendations from
Neug (09:33)
that we really know and and care about, right? And you know, we don't we've never had the experience, but someone else has, and we just do it on their recommendation. And and then we just have to go with it and see what happens, right? We may like it, we may not. but sometimes that recommendation carries quite a bit quite a bit of weight, right?
Franky (09:58)
W with that real quick though, yeah are there any are there any prerequisites for when we take that that recommendation? I mean, are you gonna take just anybody's recommendation or is there certain on a certain amount of information that has to be included in that recommendation for you to just act on it?
Neug (10:13)
Well, I think it has to first of all be somebody that you know, right? 'Cause
Franky (10:17)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (10:17)
somebody that you don't know that's giving you a recommendation on something, you could easily just, you know, blow that off as, you know, somebody's just giving you s information. But if somebody you know well is giving you a recommendation on a specific event or restaurant or what have you
you're probably gonna put a little bit more stock into that because it's somebody that you, you know, have some things in common with or somebody that maybe you've spent some time with in the past. So I think it makes a big difference, as to who's making the recommendation and and what it's all about, right? 'Cause it might be a recommendation for something that you just have no interest in. So I think it just really depends on
that type of of whatever the s that scenario might might might be.
Franky (11:01)
Does that recommendation for for you, just speaking for you, does that recommendation then make you feel like you don't need to do all this background information information gathering and detective work to find out about the thing?
Neug (11:13)
You know, it may, depending on what it is. So somebody's telling me, you know, check out this restaurant, you know, me being someone who enjoys food
I might check out the restaurant just to see what type of restaurant it is, what kind of food items they have and so forth. and even if I see some things that I might be a little bit unsure of, I probably would take that recommendation anyway. You know, just speaking, for instance, let's say that was coming from you on a particular restaurant. You know, I would probably do the I will probably have that experience anyway because it's coming from you. But somebody that I know less so, and you know, I make that same
investigation on that particular restaurant, I may not if I see some things that I really don't necessarily wanna wanna experience.
Franky (11:56)
Say for me, you know, yes, who I take the recommendation from, very much like you described, depends on, you know, who it is, what kind of relationship we have, how well they know me, how well I know them. But even even if it's somebody that's really close, a lot of times that recommendation is going to be what triggers my, inspector gadget, investigation mode over here, trying
Neug (12:14)
Mm.
Franky (12:16)
to figure out all the stuff that's going on. And I find that, you know, if somebody just says, you know, just go check it out.
The older that I've got, the older I get, you know, the more birthdays I get to celebrate, the more times I go around the sun, the less tolerant I am of that vague information, right? That that triggers me to, you know, start asking my questions. Like, all right, so, you know, what time do I need to get there? You know, what's the attire? Or here here's the question that you hear, you know, folks my age say all the time: who all's gonna be there?
So it just triggers ev regardless of who it comes from, those are the things that get triggered for me.
Neug (12:51)
Yeah, so you know, you that brings us to you know, acknowledging what's what's involved, right, with this with this event that we might take on. you know, you mentioned what time you need to get there. You might ask yourself, well, how much is it gonna cost me? You
Franky (13:08)
Mm.
Neug (13:09)
know, it may not it may not be a a a free event, right?
You know, how much how much of me is it really gonna take? How much energy am I gonna have to exp expend, you know, to do this? You know, like for instance, if you were to invite me to go on this run, I would know that I would need to really expend a great deal of energy to keep up with you
Franky (13:29)
Yeah.
Neug (13:30)
on said eleven mile run. But you know, those are some things that we really start to consider and
you know, if it's something that you've never done before or something that you haven't done in a long time, I think you might be more apt to dig in and get some more answers to some questions before you really fully commit to what might be happening. And you know, in that, are you do you shortchange yourself on the surprise? Do you shortchange
Franky (14:01)
Yeah.
Neug (14:02)
yourself on the experience by knowing so much ahead of time? Maybe.
Franky (14:05)
Hmm. Yeah. I mean you're you're almost it's almost like you're building the experience before you get there. And, you know, I I liken that to if we have too much information going in, I liken that to going to see a movie about a book that's that that's based on a book that you've read. You
Neug (14:24)
Mm.
Franky (14:25)
know, inevitably they're going, you know, because you've already got this
this experience that you've had that you've created by reading the book, but then when you go to see the movie, obviously there's going to be some dramatic liberty taken. It's not going to be exactly true to canon and there are going to be differences. So that's that's how I see that we're we're building the experience before we have it. It's that feeling. Because I know many times if I go to see a movie like that, I feel let down because, you know, my imagination created the world of the book much differently than the movie producers did.
Neug (14:56)
Yeah, and I think that's true through that has been true throughout time because how often have you heard that well the book was much better than the movie? I mean you you hear that
Franky (15:04)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (15:05)
you hear that so many times.
Franky (15:07)
Yeah.
Neug (15:07)
And you know, I guess I think the other thing that I want to bring up as we're talking about this and what it costs is you know, if you have to spend money on something,
Franky (15:17)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (15:18)
and if you have to spend a good deal of energy on something
I can imagine that, you know, at least for me and and and I'm imagining that folks in the audience too, is like, Well if I gotta spend this much on it, it better be worth it. Right.
Franky (15:32)
for sure. For sure. I mean, you know, spending the money, you know, you find you're asking about how much does it cost, you know, and then all right, if it does cost this much, what other information can I gather that can save me from not only having to feel like I wasted my money, but just having a bad experience overall? Like what what are the things that I need to know?
Neug (15:53)
Yeah, I mean, 'cause you wanna make you wanna make the right choice for you, right? Either way. and certainly, I mean, if you have others that you're bringing along with you, you wanna make sure that they have a good experience too, if it's something that it's it's a it's a group if it's a group e event or or something that involves, you know, more than just yourself. but then what happens if the event what if you go and it's an event or or a restaurant or whatever
And the experience is like, it's pretty good, but others who were telling you about this or the recommendations build it up to be like this fantastic experience.
Franky (16:34)
Hm. So the the preconceived notions are kind of following us through the whole evening and interfering with our ability to be present in the moment.
Neug (16:44)
Yeah, absolutely. And and is pretty good okay. Is is that enough for certain experiences?
Franky (16:51)
I mean, I guess it can be. I mean, again, it depends on the amount of investment, right? At least from from my perspective. So, you know, we're talking about experiences like, you know, going to the movies, going out to a fancy dinner, going to, you know, a nice bar, taking a big vacation. yeah, the the more money I spend on something, the higher my level of expectation is gonna be, or the more investment I had to make in preparing and planning for whatever the excursion is.
The higher my expectations are gonna be. In the relationship realm, let's not forget that this applies there too. You know, the more I've invested in the relationship and and everything, the more that I kind of expect out of it. You know, with the I don't necess I don't necessarily wanna say reciprocity, but you know, there can be expectations. Like, all right, I'm investing in this relationship. I need you to meet me at least halfway.
Neug (17:42)
For sure. And, you know, I th that that relational aspect has to do also with with work, right? You're taking on a a new role, a new position. I mean, there's certain things that you expect the the employer to e to meet you on, right? It it it is, you know, even though you're getting paid f to do what you're doing on that job, it is somewhat a a partnership, right? 'Cause you agree to do certain things and the employer agrees to do certain things and
You know, you you do expect that
there's some level of trust, you know, that you're both gonna get out of it what you what you want, right? I'm
Franky (18:21)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (18:21)
not saying that you're gonna be necessarily surprised, although you could be, right? You could take a position and you were unsure of it, and then it turns out to be one of the greatest positions that you ever had, right? So I mean you can be surprised and pleasantly so in that situation. And and with that I will say
you know, surprises are not always on the pleasant side of the spectrum, right? that surprise can be off of a negative experience as well. So, you know, this this whole surprise spectrum cuts both ways.
Franky (18:54)
Mm.
Neug (18:54)
And and when you think about it, go back to whole trick or treat, you when you get home and you got that bag of candy and you got some things in there that you really didn't like, right? You really don't like that kind of candy. Like one thing for me was like
It was like black licorice, man. I never did like black licorice. However, being in a neighborhood and and having siblings, you know, the nice thing was you could always trade. You could always trade off, right?
Franky (19:16)
Sure.
Neug (19:18)
but in some situations, you know, that trade is just not is not available to you.
Franky (19:22)
Man, that was one of the best parts about Halloween. when you got, go trick-or-treating and you'd you come back home, whether you had a real trick-or-treat bag or you're just using a pillowcase, one of the best part, you know, because you
Neug (19:31)
Right.
Franky (19:34)
know, as you're going from house to house, you're not exactly seeing everything that's going into the bag. Cause let's be real, with the masks and stuff we used to wear back in the day, you couldn't see a damn thing out of those things anyway, right?
Neug (19:44)
That's right. That's right.
Franky (19:47)
So you're not even seeing what you get in until you get home. So you know, you dump it all out on the floor and you see the stash. But like you said, you mentioned black licorice. There was a candy that that used to be pretty ubiquitous. Root beer barrels. It was like
Neug (20:02)
Mm.
Franky (20:02)
a it was like a hard candy shaped like a barrel and was supposed to be like root beer flavor. my gosh. it was it was rough. But yeah,
Neug (20:08)
Yep. You trade those quick, huh?
Franky (20:14)
man, yeah, trade straight to the trash.
Neug (20:16)
Ha ha ha ha.
Franky (20:18)
Straight to the trash. But I mean, you know, you you had expectations like, man, you know, I went to this house, and maybe I sh hopefully I got a full-size candy bar here. But then you find things like, this is something inside of a Ziploc bag that somebody made some Rice Krispie treats, or somebody, you know, popped some popcorn and portioned it out into things. There'll be so there's always going to be some surprises in there. Some of those surprises, like I said, are like you said, are aren't aren't necessarily positive things. Like, this looks like
An apple that's got some bad spots on it. Or this apple looks like it's been cut. We can't use this. So there's yeah, I'm with ya.
Neug (20:51)
Yeah, so there's some things that catch you off guard, right? But in a good way. Right? They catch you off guard in in one of the best possible ways. And and so I think about you know being in a situation where you did something that you, you know, maybe you were a little apprehensive about or you weren't sure if you're gonna like it, and then you just turn out to really like it. You really loved
Franky (21:11)
Yeah.
Neug (21:11)
it, you enjoyed it, right?
Neug (21:12)
You know, and it reminds me of when I lived in Wisconsin, I had some friends who liked to camp, right? I did more camping when I lived there than I have in a long time. And one of the things that we did was, you know
We rented a houseboat and I was as hey man let's let's go on this weekend and it was a long weekend was a holiday weekend let's go rent this
Franky (21:32)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (21:33)
houseboat on the Mississippi
Franky (21:35)
wow.
Neug (21:35)
and I was like you know I didn't grow up camping I didn't grow up boating I you know none of that I'm like now you want me to go out on a houseboat on the Mississippi River? Okay so I was a little apprehensive right because it was just something experience that I had no knowledge of
And so we go out there and we rent this houseboat. and it ended up being a really good time. Like here we are, there must have been, I don't know, a dozen of us on this houseboat. And we're just cruising up the Mississippi River. You find the sandbar, you run up on the sandbar, you get out, you have lunch, and and so it just turned out to be a really, really good experience. The weather wasn't the greatest, but it wasn't that bad.
But it was an experience that I really enjoyed and I and you know it it left a positive impression on me about you know just going with the flow and
Franky (22:25)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (22:25)
and seeing what happens, right? And it turned out to be a really good experience. And so you can have experiences like that where you're not really sure, but you do it anyway, and you know, years later, it's still a very pleasant memory.
Franky (22:40)
Interesting. What about that particular opportunity almost made you say no?
Neug (22:47)
Well, like I said, you know, camping was not something I did growing up. It was just not something that my family did. You know, I grew up in the city. And boating was definitely something that I didn't do. And just the idea of being on a houseboat, you know, that was boating was foreign enough, but being on a houseboat was, you know, kind of over the top for me and and just not having any experience with it.
I was like, you know, I'm not sure I really want to do this. But
Franky (23:17)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (23:17)
you know, I I I I got past it and just did it anyway. And I think it was just really just the the unknown, right? Something that I was not familiar with that, you know, put me on that spectrum of, you know, maybe I don't really want to do this. And then once I got out there, I really enjoyed it. And it was really fun because there was a point in time where I actually drove the houseboat.
Franky (23:41)
snap.
Okay.
Neug (23:42)
because we didn't have guide or anything. W it was just the people who were on the camping trip, so we all took turns to drive and this and that and let me just tell you, if you've never parallel parked a hospital.
It is an experience, to say the least.
Franky (23:55)
Mm.
Okay. I I have to say that's not on my bingo card, but okay.
Neug (24:01)
Yeah.
yeah, it w it was fun. So yeah. So sometimes I guess you have to step out of your comfort zone and and and see what happens.
Franky (24:08)
for sure. I mean, for the thing that sticks out, you know, just blindingly bright for me in this case is doing a tough mudder for the first time. You know, I've talked about
Neug (24:18)
Mm.
Franky (24:19)
these obstacle course races and all this other stuff. So the experience, you know, I was I was like, I don't know if I'm gonna like this, but it turned out
you know, it definitely scratched that itch and I just fell in love with the n whole notion of obstacle course racing and it the way it came about is was was interesting because you know, I wasn't very healthy at the time and a coworker of mine, he he wasn't very healthy either. You know, he was about, you know, three hundred and fifty pounds looking like a, you know, looking like Kenny Rogers and I was about three hundred and ten pounds, you know, looking like a butterbean. And we just started walking at work and then
Walking became walking and running, and then it became running. So we ran some short races. And then he was like, you know, this guy is also, you know, about 15 years my senior. And he's like, Look at this thing. Let's do this tough mudder. And when I looked at it, it's like, yeah, it's gonna be, 10 to 12 miles. It's gonna be on on a ski resort. So you're going up and down these slopes. But I was like, okay. But the thing that that
Neug (25:18)
Mm. Mm.
Franky (25:20)
most that came closest to making me say no.
Is that you effectively have to sign a death waiver to be able to participate in the event. It's like, all right, if you come out here and
Neug (25:29)
Wow.
Franky (25:29)
you die, you can't sue us and none of your people can sue us either. Be
Neug (25:34)
wow.
Franky (25:34)
warned. But I did it anyway, you know, and I don't think my wife was too happy about it at the time. But I'm I'm still standing and we're still together, most importantly. But yeah, I didn't think I was gonna I didn't think I was gonna enjoy that experience, but I was gonna I was willing to try to push myself and
Yeah, it came something that I just can't get enough of.
Neug (25:54)
Do you think that y the younger you, like a younger version of you, would have gone out on a tough mudder? I mean, clearly you would have been in different shape than you just described.
Franky (26:06)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (26:07)
but do you think that that was be something that you would have done or did you would you think that that was just you know, just like a a a crazy thing to think about?
Franky (26:16)
I
w the younger me would have would not have even blinked and just jumped down there. that you know, that would have definitely in my wheelhouse 'cause, much unlike you, I grew up out here in the country, so my play area was the woods, running through trails, you know, climbing all sorts of stuff and it that was just my element. So I think I would have been less impeded in my decision to do it when I was younger.
Neug (26:43)
Gotcha.
All right, well, tough mudder. I know that you've mentioned it to me and that that definitely, sir, would take some research on my part.
Franky (26:52)
I am still audience, I'm gonna have to talk to you a little bit here. Audience, I am still a little salty with y'all because you didn't come through for me. Because there was a you know, we put out the call to action to get Neug to do a tough mudder or some kind of obstacle course race with me, and all you guys had to do was comment. For the people that did, thank you.
Neug (27:13)
Well, I was
gonna say there were some PSI faithful who who did comment, so I wanna give them a shout out.
Franky (27:19)
Yes, but come on, y'all. Don't let me down again.
Neug (27:24)
So when it comes to the tough mudder, you I think I need to pause. Right? I need to take a pause.
Franky (27:27)
Okay, let's break it down. Mm-hmm.
Neug (27:31)
And, you know, I mean, haven't really decided that it's something I'm gonna do. I don't have any preconceived expectations. If I decide to do that, right? I just, you know, I don't know anything about it. So in my pause, I need to just evaluate here, you know.
what my expectation might be and just what tough mudder actually is. I've seen some pictures, but I really haven't dug into it. So you know, and then just decide for myself if it's really something that I want to do.
So that pause phase for this whole episode, you know, we're using tough mudder as an example, but you know, in every situation, you make that pause and you make some observations about current state in which you might be jumping into.
So Franky, given that scenario, tell us about, you know, how how would we shift into like like like what would the shift look like for me, for instance, if you were someone like me trying to decide about this this tough mudder?
Franky (28:36)
Sure.
I mean, you know, after you've taken that pause and you've really reflected on it, the shift happens when you really come to the conclusion of, or you really have the realization of what do I need to discover for myself? There's all these things that I have preconceived notions about or I've heard recommendations about. Well, you shift when you start that discovery process on your own and you go out and you seek the information that you need. What matters to the most to you about the experience?
You know, the mud, the barbed wire, the fire, the underwater cage. I mean I'm not doing a good job in selling you on this right now, am I?
Neug (29:15)
You y you are not sir, although I will say, I will
say that, you know, you're not truly frightening me either because you gotta remember that, you know, I was in basic training and so you know for the US Army. And so a lot of what you're talking about are things that I probably have done, or at least to
Franky (29:35)
Mm-hmm.
Neug (29:35)
some degree, and so it doesn't frighten me more so than, you know.
Am I gonna get, you know, my old big behind out there and do it?
Franky (29:46)
Sure.
Sure. Well, I think that means the most important question that you have to ask during the shift when you're trying to figure out what are the things you need to discover for yourself. You have to be honest when you ask yourself, does the person who's recommending this to me enjoy the same things that I do? And will I experience this thing differently than they do? And I think, you know, in this particular example, I think that's those are probably the two most paramount questions.
Neug (30:12)
Well, yeah, and my and one of my considerations would be, you know, can I actually finish this thing? 'Cause I you know, being somewhat competitive, I don't want to go out there and not finish it. and you know, and then the whole idea of signing this waiver that, you know, if I died and I'm just dead, that's a whole nother thing. However, if I ignite or if I s step into the ignition part of this, I think the big thing would be is
if I you know just skip past all of those nuances and just you know pay the money for the race and just you know start training for it.
Franky (30:54)
Yeah, leaving something open. That's where the ignition is. It's like, all right, well, I'm I'm not c fully closing myself off to this. And this is not to say that, you know, you have to you have to acquiesce to doing the thing or spending time with the person or going to see the movie. It doesn't necessarily mean you always have to follow through that, but you know, leave something open. It's like, okay, well, maybe there's an opportunity.
Neug (31:20)
Yeah. And so then it brings us back to the original question, like when was the last time you let something surprise you? And so I think that you and I have given some examples of you know what
types of events in our life or what types of situations that might bring a surprise. We talked about relationships, we talked about movies, we talked about excursions, and certainly, you know, there's, you know, food and restaurants and so forth. So there's a lot of different scenarios. And we even talked about employment. So there's a lot of different scenarios which could put you in a situation to be surprised. But ask yourself when was the last time that you allowed yourself
you know, to to to be surprised.
Franky (32:00)
Yeah. I mean, and it's not an all or nothing type of equation either, where it's like, okay, well, I'm I'm fully known or I f I'm fully aware of everything or I'm just totally surprised and don't know anything. There's there's a happy medium in there somewhere. my wife and I were talking about this the other day, and one of the things where that kind of falls into that happy medium category for us is I know we're talking about Halloween, but you know, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving dinner. Who comes?
You know, hey, it that guest list can be as open as we need it to be. But what's on the menu? No, no, sir. No,
Neug (32:34)
Ha ha ha.
Franky (32:35)
sir. That menu is non negotiable. I have to know we we have to know who's bringing what. And I'm sure y people have seen these viral memes on on social media. And I agree with them that Thanksgiving is not the time to be experimenting with re recipes that you found online.
Neug (32:54)
You know, that part is true and let me just say knowing what I know about, you know, the folks who show up with food to to to your house or to your event, I just bring a healthy appetite and I think I'll be fine.
Franky (33:08)
And some stretchy pants.
Neug (33:13)
Yeah, so and I and and that just brings me to another question. Like what what what pleasant surprise or what what surprise would you have experienced or would you have missed out on if you didn't have all of the facts and all of the information ahead of time? You know, you mentioned earlier that we live in this time where we have
the internet and we have Google and we have AI and we have all of these tools where we can get information. You know, think back a few years, not that long ago,
Franky (33:45)
Mm.
Neug (33:46)
especially for some of our younger listeners, where we didn't have all that. And if you wanted to go and experience something, maybe you got past a flyer or a pamphlet from someone explaining about this excursion or what have you.
But you didn't have the tools to go and do a bunch of investigative work and certainly not be able to get information in a matter of minutes or a matter of seconds toward something. You just had to experience it. You just had to go. And if you didn't like it, you didn't like it. And if you liked it, you liked it, right? And so, you know, what what would you miss out on if you
didn't expend the energy to research it to the nth degree, right? You gotta ask yourself that.
Franky (34:35)
Yeah, is the juice worth the squeeze? Yeah.
Neug (34:37)
Is the juice worth the squeeze?
Franky (34:39)
You know, is it is it really worth putting in all this effort? I mean, with all the effort that you put in, you could have just gone and experienced it and learned it for yourself rather than leaning on all the information or let's be real, misinformation that you might
Neug (34:51)
Correct.
Franky (34:52)
be consuming. You know, hey, myth misinformation is the fifth horseman of the apocalypse, you best believe.
Neug (34:58)
Mm.
Franky (34:59)
It's not just four.
Neug (35:00)
like that we'll we'll we'll use that down the road somewhere and you know with that misinformation you could easily talk yourself out of a really good experience so
Franky (35:09)
For sure.
Neug (35:10)
consider everything that we have given you today I think that it's been a a good conversation Franky is always a good conversation talking through things with you and and learning some things you know root beer barrels and and and the like really appreciate that
And so before we get out of here, folks, we we we want to tell you how you can find us on the PSI Effect Podcast. Hopefully you've enjoyed this episode as much as we have. And I'm gonna let Franky take it from here and let you know where you can find us.
Franky (35:38)
Yeah, well before I jump into that Neug what are you doing for Halloween?
Neug (35:42)
probably not a whole lot. I don't have any events that I'm going to. I might, you know, cruise through the neighborhood and look at some of the decorations that folks have have put up 'cause I can tell you, you know, I've lived out here for a few years and it seems like every year folks their their decorations seem to expand.
Franky (36:01)
Mm.
Neug (36:02)
and so
I'll probably do something like that and you know, maybe pass out a few root beer barrels or whatever else I can find.
Franky (36:10)
you trying to get your house vandalized.
Neug (36:13)
Hey, listen, let me just tell the audience: I got a friend who growing up, him and his family would they would think of things throughout the year that they could do that were definitely tricks. They were not treats. Okay. One year they gave out batteries, one year they gave out tea bags.
Another year they got these little cups and they put cauliflower in So they were they were after, you know, what could they do for the trick? And it seems like the folks in the neighborhood always looked forward to coming to their house because they never knew what they were going to
Franky (36:45)
Oof.
Neug (36:46)
That's wild.
Franky (36:47)
Yeah, that that that is that is wild. Wow. Okay. Yeah, I'm not mad at that. Well,
Neug (36:53)
I won't be doing that though, Franky.
Franky (36:54)
okay. Okay. Like I said, I don't want your house getting vandalized. You know, these kids nowadays are they
Neug (36:58)
I don't want to do
Franky (36:58)
they're built different.
Neug (37:01)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Franky (37:03)
man. But yeah, we'll probably you know, obviously where I live we don't get trick or treaters 'cause we're just sitting such a rural space. But my younger son and I will probably head out to a local neighborhood where some of his friends from school live and walk the neighborhood there. It'll be a it'll be an opportunity for me to try out by, you know, some of my what I I think I've talked about it before, my my little hobby of crafting and things like that. So I've made a costume.
to try out this year. So maybe if things go well I'll we'll share some photos with the with the audience and some of our social media feeds too.
Neug (37:37)
I think we should. We're gonna hold you to that, sir.
Franky (37:40)
All right. Well, if we're going to share those photos with you from Halloween, you got to know exactly where to find us. So for anything PSI effect podcast related, go to our website. This is PSIpod.com. There you'll find all of the episodes. And man, I was looking the other day. That library is getting pretty big. So that there's plenty of content to consume. Go out there and check out some of those older episodes, especially if you haven't been able to partake of them in real time.
We are on Spotify, Amazon, Apple Podcasts. you name it, we're out there. So find us on your favorite podcast platform and subscribe. Get those automatic downloads going. We also do video of every episode, and that is on YouTube. You can find us by searching the PSI Effect Podcast or use our handle at this is PSI Pod, which is also our handle for social media: Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube Shorts, at
This is PSI Pod. Keep those comments coming.
Neug (38:39)
Perfect. Yes, we do welcome your comments and we we do challenge you to let us know how you're you're doing and some of the challenges that we put forth each week. We'd love to talk about that in the comment section, so make sure you do that. And so, you know, with that, we're gonna get out of here. We really appreciate you. Just remember that setbacks are temporary and comebacks are indeed legendary. Until next time, go out there and be brave and rise on purpose.
