Should've Slept With A Breadmaker | Mummy (1999)

WEBVTT
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.980
Hey, what's up? Hello, ladies, gentlemen, everyone
00:00:01.980 --> 00:00:05.719
in between. My name is DJ. I'm Raz. And welcome
00:00:05.719 --> 00:00:08.060
to the Tapeworm Podcast. Today, we're checking
00:00:08.060 --> 00:00:10.279
out what happens if you decide to stick your
00:00:10.279 --> 00:00:13.859
dick inside of the most important woman of all
00:00:13.859 --> 00:00:16.000
of ancient Egypt. That's right, we're talking
00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000
about 1999's The Mummy, starring Brendan Fraser
00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:21.820
and Rachel Wise. Now, Raz, this was one of your
00:00:21.820 --> 00:00:26.100
childhood movies, correct? Yes, it was. Was it
00:00:26.100 --> 00:00:29.719
a daily watch? monthly watch yearly i watched
00:00:29.719 --> 00:00:31.920
this quite frequently throughout my childhood
00:00:31.920 --> 00:00:34.719
i i don't know it was just one of those vhs tapes
00:00:34.719 --> 00:00:38.280
that was in my entertainment console and i picked
00:00:38.280 --> 00:00:40.960
it up one day and watched it and it just became
00:00:40.960 --> 00:00:44.020
one of those movies i went back to now and then
00:00:44.020 --> 00:00:49.880
really this this one yeah believe it or not i
00:00:49.880 --> 00:00:53.500
mean no I do like this movie. This is a fun movie.
00:00:53.700 --> 00:00:56.259
I'll be honest, not one that we watched often.
00:00:56.439 --> 00:00:58.780
It was definitely on. I remember seeing it on
00:00:58.780 --> 00:01:02.780
the TV passing by, but I never sat down and watched
00:01:02.780 --> 00:01:06.519
it. To be honest with you, for this podcast,
00:01:06.780 --> 00:01:10.099
for this episode, I watched this movie four or
00:01:10.099 --> 00:01:14.400
five times. I cannot tell you how it ends. There's
00:01:14.400 --> 00:01:17.420
a certain point, and then nothing. I can't remember
00:01:17.420 --> 00:01:20.230
any of that. So, obviously, it does not hold
00:01:20.230 --> 00:01:23.590
my attention very well. I do enjoy it, but for
00:01:23.590 --> 00:01:28.930
some reason, it just, there's a blank. Now, that
00:01:28.930 --> 00:01:31.609
being said, we did watch a movie constantly.
00:01:32.030 --> 00:01:34.950
I'd say at least once a month. That is, part
00:01:34.950 --> 00:01:37.189
of this series, I didn't realize it was part
00:01:37.189 --> 00:01:39.689
of this series until about four years ago or
00:01:39.689 --> 00:01:43.390
so, but we watched The Scorpion King so much,
00:01:43.390 --> 00:01:45.849
which is not a good movie. I would have much
00:01:45.849 --> 00:01:49.390
preferred to watch this as a kid. but yeah we
00:01:49.390 --> 00:01:53.250
definitely not not one that was on often we did
00:01:53.250 --> 00:01:57.049
watch it probably on usa or some some shit like
00:01:57.049 --> 00:01:59.709
that because you know what was it was it usa
00:01:59.709 --> 00:02:02.150
we have the movies or some shit like that do
00:02:02.150 --> 00:02:04.930
you remember what their slogan was that sounds
00:02:04.930 --> 00:02:09.729
right to me yeah i remember usa raising me more
00:02:09.729 --> 00:02:12.490
so than my parents did like that and like the
00:02:12.490 --> 00:02:14.909
sci -fi channel So have you watched the original,
00:02:15.050 --> 00:02:19.289
the 1932? I have to say I have not. I'm ashamed
00:02:19.289 --> 00:02:22.330
to admit that. No, I haven't either. I think
00:02:22.330 --> 00:02:25.409
it would be cool for us to, like, down the line,
00:02:25.409 --> 00:02:30.969
kind of watch the original movies. Like, have
00:02:30.969 --> 00:02:33.689
a series where we watch the original and compare
00:02:33.689 --> 00:02:37.009
it to the remakes. Because we grew up with the
00:02:37.009 --> 00:02:41.189
remake. I should say, technically, this is a
00:02:41.189 --> 00:02:45.500
remake. This is considered a remake to the 1932
00:02:45.500 --> 00:02:50.180
Universal horror movie. I haven't seen it either.
00:02:50.259 --> 00:02:54.319
I would like to see it. I just don't know if...
00:02:54.319 --> 00:02:57.159
I guess my main thing is the whole catalyst for
00:02:57.159 --> 00:03:00.960
everything that happens in this movie is Imhotep
00:03:00.960 --> 00:03:04.680
was fucking the Pharaoh's woman. Does that happen
00:03:04.680 --> 00:03:08.860
in the 1932? What is the backstory of Emotep
00:03:08.860 --> 00:03:12.699
in 1932? Because are they that progressive, I
00:03:12.699 --> 00:03:16.460
guess? I don't know. No, I know he's like in
00:03:16.460 --> 00:03:19.840
it, but yeah, I assume it's a pretty similar
00:03:19.840 --> 00:03:23.199
plot line. But I don't know. I have issues with
00:03:23.199 --> 00:03:27.020
the logic of that whole thing in the first place,
00:03:27.120 --> 00:03:30.360
but we'll get into that. So apparently, did you
00:03:30.360 --> 00:03:34.319
see who was supposed to direct this before Stephen
00:03:34.319 --> 00:03:39.879
Sommers got involved? No. Okay. Apparently, Clive
00:03:39.879 --> 00:03:44.099
Barker was attached to the film. He did Hellraiser.
00:03:44.240 --> 00:03:46.840
Could you imagine what kind of movie this would
00:03:46.840 --> 00:03:50.740
be? That would have been a much different movie.
00:03:50.979 --> 00:03:55.460
A much darker, weirder version. Especially Clive
00:03:55.460 --> 00:03:58.939
Barker. The other one was George Romero. Okay.
00:03:59.599 --> 00:04:02.360
You know. Oh, I almost said The Walking Dead.
00:04:02.419 --> 00:04:05.780
I am so sorry, George Romero. That was a slap
00:04:05.780 --> 00:04:09.080
in the face. Night of the Living Dead. George
00:04:09.080 --> 00:04:12.979
Romero. See, I could see that. I feel like that
00:04:12.979 --> 00:04:15.800
would be pretty cool. That would have been interesting.
00:04:16.060 --> 00:04:17.920
I definitely think he would have made a good
00:04:17.920 --> 00:04:20.680
movie, a good film. I don't think it would have
00:04:20.680 --> 00:04:23.939
been the cult classic, it turned out to be. Right,
00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:26.420
yeah. It would have been good. I agree with that.
00:04:26.560 --> 00:04:29.610
I kind of want to see Clive Barker. Because,
00:04:29.610 --> 00:04:32.209
like, I kind of want to see, you know, Emotep
00:04:32.209 --> 00:04:35.470
being all gross and drippy and not live action.
00:04:35.550 --> 00:04:37.529
That's not the word. Practical. Practical effects.
00:04:37.649 --> 00:04:41.310
And Clive Barker's just fucking gross. So I can
00:04:41.310 --> 00:04:43.850
see Emotep coming back and just, like, coming
00:04:43.850 --> 00:04:47.529
on people or something. Just, yeah. Clive Barker's
00:04:47.529 --> 00:04:51.870
just gross. And honestly, when Summers... Summers?
00:04:52.379 --> 00:04:55.379
Stephen Sommers, I think. When he came on, he
00:04:55.379 --> 00:04:59.639
wanted it to be a romantic adventure instead
00:04:59.639 --> 00:05:04.879
of a horror. Interesting. So I guess it's kind
00:05:04.879 --> 00:05:08.779
of a romantic adventure. I can definitely see
00:05:08.779 --> 00:05:14.199
hints at that. Yeah, it's definitely not. I guess
00:05:14.199 --> 00:05:18.879
he was looking for an Indiana Jones type deal.
00:05:18.980 --> 00:05:22.079
Once again, I can see that. You mix Indiana Jones
00:05:22.079 --> 00:05:25.000
with a little bit of horror, and that's what
00:05:25.000 --> 00:05:27.620
you kind of get. Honestly, when I was workshopping
00:05:27.620 --> 00:05:30.740
the opening line for this, one of the lines that
00:05:30.740 --> 00:05:34.319
I came up with was Indiana Jones meets the Evil
00:05:34.319 --> 00:05:37.019
Dead, which kind of seems like a really cool
00:05:37.019 --> 00:05:39.680
fucking movie, in my opinion. Like, could you
00:05:39.680 --> 00:05:41.680
imagine Indiana Jones fighting the Deadites?
00:05:41.879 --> 00:05:44.399
I'm just saying. Brendan Fraser is one of your
00:05:44.399 --> 00:05:47.720
favorite actors, right? He was one of my favorite
00:05:47.720 --> 00:05:50.819
childhood actors, yes. Okay, yes, that's better.
00:05:51.120 --> 00:05:53.480
Brendan Fraser was one of your childhood favorites.
00:05:54.259 --> 00:05:57.639
Yes. Yeah, because what has he done lately? Well,
00:05:57.680 --> 00:06:00.399
that's a whole thing we won't get into. I'm going
00:06:00.399 --> 00:06:03.319
to touch into it a little bit here in a minute.
00:06:03.740 --> 00:06:07.920
But the whole reason he was casted in this was
00:06:07.920 --> 00:06:10.180
apparently because of George of the Jungle. His
00:06:10.180 --> 00:06:14.279
success with that movie. is what got him in here.
00:06:14.420 --> 00:06:17.420
I did not know that one came before. I guess
00:06:17.420 --> 00:06:22.279
it did, yeah. What was that? Was it 97? Yeah.
00:06:22.680 --> 00:06:25.920
How much about Brendan Fraser do you know? I
00:06:25.920 --> 00:06:28.680
could not write a biography about him, but I
00:06:28.680 --> 00:06:30.800
know a little bit. Okay, do you know that he
00:06:30.800 --> 00:06:36.100
does his own stunts? I believe it, yeah. Okay,
00:06:36.160 --> 00:06:41.209
so this man is fucking crazy. First of all, He
00:06:41.209 --> 00:06:44.269
was choked unconscious during the hanging scene
00:06:44.269 --> 00:06:48.329
in this movie. He had to be resuscitated. Which,
00:06:48.389 --> 00:06:50.870
first of all, knowing that and then seeing that
00:06:50.870 --> 00:06:55.449
scene, when he's down on the ground gasping,
00:06:55.449 --> 00:06:59.930
it just adds such more realism to everything.
00:07:00.269 --> 00:07:04.110
But that, not that specifically, but the fact
00:07:04.110 --> 00:07:06.629
that he did his own stunts is a big reason why
00:07:06.629 --> 00:07:10.019
we don't see much of him anymore. He... fucked
00:07:10.019 --> 00:07:14.680
his body up so bad that he's had to have so many
00:07:14.680 --> 00:07:17.439
surgeries like his spine is fused together because
00:07:17.439 --> 00:07:22.899
of stunts gone wrong and surgeries and all that
00:07:22.899 --> 00:07:24.980
other stuff is a big reason why we don't see
00:07:24.980 --> 00:07:27.740
him much anymore that mixed with some other things
00:07:27.740 --> 00:07:30.439
but that stuff we won't get into another issue
00:07:30.439 --> 00:07:33.759
with filming apparently so the set was built
00:07:33.759 --> 00:07:37.639
in morocco and The heat was so bad that they
00:07:37.639 --> 00:07:41.759
had to create a special drink to stop them from
00:07:41.759 --> 00:07:45.199
dehydrating. Like, they had to create a special
00:07:45.199 --> 00:07:49.839
electrolyte drink. Really? Yeah. What do they
00:07:49.839 --> 00:07:52.959
do? Throw some salt in some water? No, probably
00:07:52.959 --> 00:07:55.459
not, because apparently there were sandstorms,
00:07:55.459 --> 00:07:58.759
too. So all you had to do was open your mouth
00:07:58.759 --> 00:08:01.759
and then throw some water. And apparently some
00:08:01.759 --> 00:08:04.480
wildlife hazards. I don't know what that means.
00:08:05.279 --> 00:08:08.439
I don't know what wildlife is in Morocco. I am
00:08:08.439 --> 00:08:11.439
not up to date on Moroccan wildlife. Yeah, neither
00:08:11.439 --> 00:08:17.100
am I. Well, apparently, wildlife of Morocco includes
00:08:17.100 --> 00:08:21.240
the Barbary lion, although I thought that went
00:08:21.240 --> 00:08:25.139
extinct, and Egyptian cobras. So I'm assuming
00:08:25.139 --> 00:08:27.660
they have some snake problems. Okay, I can see
00:08:27.660 --> 00:08:30.519
that. What about scarab beetles? So, apparently,
00:08:30.800 --> 00:08:33.460
like... Watching the movie, you can tell that
00:08:33.460 --> 00:08:37.100
a lot of the Scarab Beetles are CGI, but also
00:08:37.100 --> 00:08:40.200
some of them were glued onto the actors as well,
00:08:40.320 --> 00:08:44.919
which is fucking disgusting. Like actual live
00:08:44.919 --> 00:08:52.980
beetles? I don't think so. I hope not. But, I
00:08:52.980 --> 00:08:55.259
don't know, just, could you imagine even a plastic
00:08:55.259 --> 00:08:59.279
beetle glued to you? It would be a little uncomfortable.
00:09:00.139 --> 00:09:02.970
Yeah. Yeah, it would. Apparently, Rachel Wise
00:09:02.970 --> 00:09:05.250
took this role to get away from period dramas.
00:09:05.529 --> 00:09:08.149
I don't know what other period dramas. She looks
00:09:08.149 --> 00:09:10.309
familiar, but I can't think of anything else
00:09:10.309 --> 00:09:11.850
that she's been in. Yeah, I couldn't tell you.
00:09:11.870 --> 00:09:14.830
I'm not a big partaker of period dramas. Yeah,
00:09:14.909 --> 00:09:17.389
neither am I. I don't like, honestly, I don't
00:09:17.389 --> 00:09:22.730
really like period pieces at all. But it's kind
00:09:22.730 --> 00:09:24.970
of funny. She took this to get away from a period
00:09:24.970 --> 00:09:29.570
drama, only to end up in another period drama.
00:09:30.269 --> 00:09:33.049
in this movie i won't disagree with you on that
00:09:33.049 --> 00:09:36.710
part the mummy definitely has a certain you know
00:09:36.710 --> 00:09:40.850
period element to it but primarily is a action
00:09:40.850 --> 00:09:43.990
adventure flick not a drama so i will repeat
00:09:43.990 --> 00:09:46.870
you on that i can see that but it's still a period
00:09:46.870 --> 00:09:52.009
piece okay which doesn't make sense to me why
00:09:52.009 --> 00:09:57.090
does it have to take place in 1923 1926 I assume,
00:09:57.169 --> 00:09:59.509
I'm not an expert, but I assume there was probably
00:09:59.509 --> 00:10:04.710
a large interest in Egyptian mythology at the
00:10:04.710 --> 00:10:09.110
time or Egyptian relics that brought attention
00:10:09.110 --> 00:10:12.110
to that. And that's probably why that time period
00:10:12.110 --> 00:10:14.710
was chosen. Think about if you're making a movie
00:10:14.710 --> 00:10:17.370
about World War II, why would you film it? Why
00:10:17.370 --> 00:10:21.090
would you make it about 1939 to 1945? I can see
00:10:21.090 --> 00:10:24.610
what you're saying. Like the digs and everything.
00:10:25.269 --> 00:10:28.200
Yeah. would be happening but why couldn't it
00:10:28.200 --> 00:10:31.519
happen in 1999 it certainly could have most likely
00:10:31.519 --> 00:10:34.679
the either the original film was set in that
00:10:34.679 --> 00:10:36.740
period and they wanted to keep with that kind
00:10:36.740 --> 00:10:38.879
of time period or they just they were trying
00:10:38.879 --> 00:10:40.779
to go for a certain story and they didn't feel
00:10:40.779 --> 00:10:46.440
they could fit that into a 1999 period okay i
00:10:46.440 --> 00:10:49.500
can see that i mean could you imagine if instead
00:10:49.500 --> 00:10:51.740
of taking a steamboat down the river they took
00:10:51.740 --> 00:10:55.600
a jet ski I mean... It just wouldn't fit the
00:10:55.600 --> 00:10:59.740
vibe as much. Apparently the mummy face in the
00:10:59.740 --> 00:11:03.139
sand CGI trick was super cutting edge at the
00:11:03.139 --> 00:11:07.200
time and cost millions. I don't know how many
00:11:07.200 --> 00:11:11.779
millions, but apparently it was worth quite a
00:11:11.779 --> 00:11:14.980
bit of money just to do... No, I guess it does
00:11:14.980 --> 00:11:17.440
happen twice, doesn't it? It happens once in
00:11:17.440 --> 00:11:21.700
the beginning, and then there's that sandstorm.
00:11:22.669 --> 00:11:25.330
where the face appears as well i believe so yeah
00:11:25.330 --> 00:11:27.769
okay because i was thinking it was only the first
00:11:27.769 --> 00:11:30.309
one i'm like holy shit millions of dollars for
00:11:30.309 --> 00:11:36.330
a cgi effect that happens in like what three
00:11:36.330 --> 00:11:39.769
seconds of screen time yeah it was a very short
00:11:39.769 --> 00:11:42.870
short clip yeah i will just say i think that
00:11:42.870 --> 00:11:47.320
goes to show the skill the experience that their
00:11:47.320 --> 00:11:50.539
uh cgi studio has which if you didn't know was
00:11:50.539 --> 00:11:53.320
industrial light and magic that industrial light
00:11:53.320 --> 00:11:55.440
and magic that was uh founded by george lucas
00:11:55.440 --> 00:11:58.139
yeah i can i can see that i didn't know that
00:11:58.139 --> 00:12:00.440
was his production company or his effects company
00:12:00.440 --> 00:12:03.539
uh yeah he founded it i don't think he has anything
00:12:03.539 --> 00:12:05.980
to do with it now but yeah all right i think
00:12:05.980 --> 00:12:09.879
you're ready to get into it yeah all right so
00:12:09.879 --> 00:12:16.059
we start up in ancient egypt in 1290 BC, which
00:12:16.059 --> 00:12:18.480
I know absolutely nothing about this era. Do
00:12:18.480 --> 00:12:23.080
you know anything about ancient Egypt at all?
00:12:24.039 --> 00:12:27.600
Absolutely nothing. All I know is that ancient
00:12:27.600 --> 00:12:33.000
Egyptologists was a job you could have in ancient
00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:36.299
Egypt. That's how old ancient ancient Egypt was.
00:12:36.580 --> 00:12:43.509
Oh. Okay. Kind of insane to me, but... So during
00:12:43.509 --> 00:12:47.789
this time, could you have that job in 1290 BC?
00:12:49.149 --> 00:12:53.149
Yeah, hands down. I bet you. Yeah? Jesus. Ancient
00:12:53.149 --> 00:12:58.509
Egypt was older. There was a bigger time period
00:12:58.509 --> 00:13:02.950
between ancient Egypt and Julius Caesar than
00:13:02.950 --> 00:13:05.409
there is between Julius Caesar and now. Really?
00:13:05.429 --> 00:13:08.830
Yes, I'm sure there was. So we start off with
00:13:08.830 --> 00:13:12.590
Imhotep, the high priest of Pharaoh's city. Imhotep's
00:13:12.590 --> 00:13:15.649
kind of a big deal in Egypt. He's basically second
00:13:15.649 --> 00:13:18.990
in command. But he's got one tiny little problem.
00:13:19.690 --> 00:13:24.669
He's fucking Anaksu Namun, Seti's mistress. Which,
00:13:24.730 --> 00:13:27.850
I'm sorry, but if you're gonna get your dick
00:13:27.850 --> 00:13:35.870
wet, maybe don't go after the most watched over
00:13:35.870 --> 00:13:41.960
person in the area where you're at. Like maybe
00:13:41.960 --> 00:13:45.120
go after a blacksmith's wife or something. Not
00:13:45.120 --> 00:13:49.080
the Pharaohs. I'm just, maybe not a blacksmith.
00:13:49.080 --> 00:13:51.419
They have weapons, but like, I don't know, bread
00:13:51.419 --> 00:13:54.259
maker or something, you know, you could literally
00:13:54.259 --> 00:13:56.919
choose anybody that you want, but you choose
00:13:56.919 --> 00:14:00.679
the fucking Pharaohs woman. Which just seems
00:14:00.679 --> 00:14:02.960
like a bad idea to me. I agree, it was not his
00:14:02.960 --> 00:14:05.840
finest moment. I will say, a bread maker is typically
00:14:05.840 --> 00:14:09.659
called a baker. Okay, yes, usually. But, I mean,
00:14:09.700 --> 00:14:12.080
bakers can bake anything. Bread makers, all they
00:14:12.080 --> 00:14:14.720
know how to make is bread. Just saying. Now,
00:14:14.820 --> 00:14:17.320
I will just say, guys. When she tells you not
00:14:17.320 --> 00:14:20.039
to worry about that guy, this is a movie for
00:14:20.039 --> 00:14:22.299
you. So, Farrow said he has this whole rule,
00:14:22.559 --> 00:14:26.139
nobody's allowed to touch her. But, Imhotep decides,
00:14:26.539 --> 00:14:28.860
fuck it, whatever, I'm gonna get my dick wet.
00:14:29.320 --> 00:14:33.740
So she paints herself gold and Imhotep just rubs
00:14:33.740 --> 00:14:36.419
his hands all over her, smearing all that makeup.
00:14:36.679 --> 00:14:40.759
Or body paint, sorry. Seti comes in and is like,
00:14:40.919 --> 00:14:43.039
obviously somebody's been touching you. What's
00:14:43.039 --> 00:14:45.299
been happening? She fucking stabs him in the
00:14:45.299 --> 00:14:48.100
stomach. So this is the part that I don't understand.
00:14:48.340 --> 00:14:51.879
She kills the pharaoh and then kills herself.
00:14:52.139 --> 00:14:56.419
Why? Why did she commit suicide? I imagine it's
00:14:56.419 --> 00:14:59.470
because in that... In the lore of the movie,
00:14:59.590 --> 00:15:04.590
in that time period, the punishment for doing
00:15:04.590 --> 00:15:09.690
something like that was excruciating. It was
00:15:09.690 --> 00:15:13.690
terrible. Okay, fair. So, killing herself was
00:15:13.690 --> 00:15:17.909
the lesser, was the better way to go. Okay, that
00:15:17.909 --> 00:15:22.049
makes sense. So, she commits suicide. Imhotep
00:15:22.049 --> 00:15:26.440
ends up... fleeing taking the body and they start
00:15:26.440 --> 00:15:29.460
doing this ritual to bring her back from the
00:15:29.460 --> 00:15:32.659
dead by reading what is it they read from the
00:15:32.659 --> 00:15:35.600
book of is it the book of the dead to bring people
00:15:35.600 --> 00:15:37.840
back to life and i know it's bad i believe so
00:15:37.840 --> 00:15:41.480
yes yeah so he starts doing this ritual and then
00:15:41.480 --> 00:15:44.779
the pharaoh's guards show up interrupt the ritual
00:15:44.779 --> 00:15:48.019
you get this cool shot of her soul coming back
00:15:48.019 --> 00:15:51.259
into the body and then leaving because it gets
00:15:51.259 --> 00:15:56.480
interrupted But then they end up doing the worst
00:15:56.480 --> 00:15:59.940
possible punishment to Imhotep called the Hamdai,
00:16:00.100 --> 00:16:05.279
which... Two things. First of all, would they
00:16:05.279 --> 00:16:09.279
ever mummify a criminal like this? I thought
00:16:09.279 --> 00:16:12.590
mummification was for... Like royalty. Yeah,
00:16:12.610 --> 00:16:15.129
so my understanding is that you would only really
00:16:15.129 --> 00:16:18.149
mummify people of high importance or people of
00:16:18.149 --> 00:16:20.590
high importance could mummify things, animals
00:16:20.590 --> 00:16:24.389
and pets that were close to them. Right. Don't,
00:16:24.389 --> 00:16:28.029
I'm not aware of any punishments or anything
00:16:28.029 --> 00:16:31.049
like that that would involve mummification. However,
00:16:31.230 --> 00:16:36.669
in the lore of the movie, it makes sense. Yeah,
00:16:36.669 --> 00:16:39.710
I can understand the, you know. In the lore of
00:16:39.710 --> 00:16:42.129
the movie. I was just curious if this ever actually
00:16:42.129 --> 00:16:46.009
happened. Then again, how do we know that it
00:16:46.009 --> 00:16:48.269
hasn't happened? Well, that was one thing the
00:16:48.269 --> 00:16:50.990
Egyptians were very good at. They were very good
00:16:50.990 --> 00:16:55.190
at keeping records. That's fair. True. But that's
00:16:55.190 --> 00:16:59.529
only if we have been able to translate properly.
00:17:01.169 --> 00:17:04.359
Fair. You know what I mean? Our entire knowledge
00:17:04.359 --> 00:17:07.480
is undid by one typo that they did on a stone
00:17:07.480 --> 00:17:09.839
tablet. Yeah, but anyway, so they do the Humdai.
00:17:09.960 --> 00:17:11.980
They wrap him up like a mummy. They cut out his
00:17:11.980 --> 00:17:15.119
tongue, seal him inside of a sarcophagus with
00:17:15.119 --> 00:17:19.920
hundreds of flesh -eating scarabs, and just in
00:17:19.920 --> 00:17:22.559
case, if emotes have... So I guess technically,
00:17:22.799 --> 00:17:28.630
he's never... He never dies inside of this sarcophagus.
00:17:28.630 --> 00:17:31.470
Is he technically immortal? I'm confused on this
00:17:31.470 --> 00:17:34.089
part. So, from what I got from the movie is that
00:17:34.089 --> 00:17:37.670
he did kind of essentially die, but if he ever
00:17:37.670 --> 00:17:42.789
got woken up and regained his full power by consuming
00:17:42.789 --> 00:17:46.130
other people, their essence, whatever the case
00:17:46.130 --> 00:17:49.950
is, then he would become truly immortal. Okay.
00:17:49.970 --> 00:17:53.170
I guess technically, if he ever gets disturbed,
00:17:53.450 --> 00:17:57.559
which involves... Finding the sarcophagus, opening
00:17:57.559 --> 00:18:00.000
the sarcophagus, and reading from the Book of
00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:03.740
the Dead, I believe? Okay. Unless that's what
00:18:03.740 --> 00:18:07.880
seemed to wake him up. And then he comes to his
00:18:07.880 --> 00:18:10.200
full... No, actually, I don't even think he needs
00:18:10.200 --> 00:18:12.799
to come to his full potential. I think once he
00:18:12.799 --> 00:18:16.420
wakes up, he brings about the Ten Plagues of
00:18:16.420 --> 00:18:20.359
Egypt. So, I think what it really comes down
00:18:20.359 --> 00:18:22.859
to is that he is technically immortal, but he
00:18:22.859 --> 00:18:26.490
doesn't have all his powers. Because as he consumed
00:18:26.490 --> 00:18:29.369
more people, that's when the plague started happening.
00:18:29.549 --> 00:18:31.849
And that's when he got access to his mystical
00:18:31.849 --> 00:18:36.769
sandstorm powers and so forth. And blocking out
00:18:36.769 --> 00:18:40.450
the sun. So pretty much, they bury him under
00:18:40.450 --> 00:18:44.210
a giant stone slab. And they're just like, fuck
00:18:44.210 --> 00:18:48.529
it. So we cut to 3 ,000 years later. There's
00:18:48.529 --> 00:18:52.970
a voice over here that... pisses me off. The
00:18:52.970 --> 00:18:55.509
whole beginning part is being told in voiceover.
00:18:55.670 --> 00:18:59.750
And then you come out and you see the Majai and
00:18:59.750 --> 00:19:03.150
basically they're we the Majai have been tasked
00:19:03.150 --> 00:19:06.750
with keeping Imhotep sealed away blah blah blah
00:19:06.750 --> 00:19:09.829
whatever. Making sure nobody disturbs him. I
00:19:09.829 --> 00:19:13.630
would have preferred if they never announced
00:19:13.630 --> 00:19:15.950
who they were. I could do without the we the
00:19:15.950 --> 00:19:18.630
Majai. Because what ends up happening is you
00:19:18.630 --> 00:19:22.160
keep seeing the magi off in the distance and
00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:24.619
then at a certain point they come in and they
00:19:24.619 --> 00:19:28.660
try to kill our main characters and it i feel
00:19:28.660 --> 00:19:30.339
like it would have just worked so much better
00:19:30.339 --> 00:19:33.420
if we had no idea who the fuck they were they
00:19:33.420 --> 00:19:35.720
were just this weird mysterious for all that
00:19:35.720 --> 00:19:39.000
we know they could have been part of emotep's
00:19:39.000 --> 00:19:43.079
clan but then later on you find out they're actually
00:19:43.079 --> 00:19:45.930
the good guys trying to help I feel like that
00:19:45.930 --> 00:19:47.710
would have been more powerful. I agree. I think
00:19:47.710 --> 00:19:49.430
if they would have stayed in the background as
00:19:49.430 --> 00:19:53.690
this mysterious organization or this group that
00:19:53.690 --> 00:19:55.849
was trying to kill them, trying to stop them
00:19:55.849 --> 00:19:59.990
this whole time, and then right towards the second
00:19:59.990 --> 00:20:04.430
half or last little bit of the movie, you find
00:20:04.430 --> 00:20:07.710
out they've been trying to stop us because of
00:20:07.710 --> 00:20:10.930
this. Yeah, they were trying to help us by stopping
00:20:10.930 --> 00:20:15.700
it. But no. That's my own personal thing. I feel
00:20:15.700 --> 00:20:19.559
like to me, it felt like it went through like
00:20:19.559 --> 00:20:22.279
a test viewing and people were like, I don't
00:20:22.279 --> 00:20:25.480
understand it. And then they had to change with
00:20:25.480 --> 00:20:30.900
some shitty voiceover because it definitely feels
00:20:30.900 --> 00:20:34.160
kind of shoehorned in. But once you know that
00:20:34.160 --> 00:20:37.180
fact in the very beginning, I just feel like
00:20:37.180 --> 00:20:39.500
it ruins it for me. But that's my own personal
00:20:39.500 --> 00:20:41.240
opinion. I can see where you're coming from.
00:20:41.279 --> 00:20:43.849
I think it definitely would have been. If they
00:20:43.849 --> 00:20:45.970
were trying to go for more of a thriller, adventure
00:20:45.970 --> 00:20:49.009
kind of movie, that would have been the much
00:20:49.009 --> 00:20:51.069
better way to go. I think if they went that way,
00:20:51.089 --> 00:20:53.869
though, we wouldn't have ended up with the cult
00:20:53.869 --> 00:20:57.869
classic, the campy, almost, comedy that we ended
00:20:57.869 --> 00:21:01.049
up with. I think it turned out the way it turned
00:21:01.049 --> 00:21:04.809
out, probably for the better. I don't know, because
00:21:04.809 --> 00:21:08.009
I disagree with that. Just because, while watching
00:21:08.009 --> 00:21:12.200
the movie, until they show up, I keep forgetting
00:21:12.200 --> 00:21:15.680
that they exist. I feel like if you didn't know
00:21:15.680 --> 00:21:17.279
who these people were that were just kind of
00:21:17.279 --> 00:21:19.559
watching over, and then they show up every so
00:21:19.559 --> 00:21:23.180
often, it wouldn't have changed the overall tone
00:21:23.180 --> 00:21:25.460
of the movie. I think it would have just added
00:21:25.460 --> 00:21:28.460
a little bit extra to it. Until, you know, Act
00:21:28.460 --> 00:21:32.059
2, where it's like, that makes more sense. I
00:21:32.059 --> 00:21:35.539
can see that. But, either way, they decided to
00:21:35.539 --> 00:21:38.559
put the damn... voiceover in and ruin it for
00:21:38.559 --> 00:21:40.480
me i will say i think that's common for the time
00:21:40.480 --> 00:21:43.839
period though too i feel like a lot of 90s and
00:21:43.839 --> 00:21:46.880
2000s movies had that opening i can't think of
00:21:46.880 --> 00:21:50.279
the word fair anyway so we cut to roughly about
00:21:50.279 --> 00:21:57.059
3 000 years later uh 1923 you know what i so
00:21:57.059 --> 00:22:01.470
in egypt it's 1290 And when we cut into modern
00:22:01.470 --> 00:22:05.529
times, it's 1923. Do you think that's why it's
00:22:05.529 --> 00:22:12.869
in 1923? In the 1920s? Because 1290 and 1920
00:22:12.869 --> 00:22:17.049
just kind of flip the two middle numbers. I don't
00:22:17.049 --> 00:22:20.369
know if that's an actual thing. I'm just... But
00:22:20.369 --> 00:22:25.769
we cut to 1923. We're in the desert. Exposition.
00:22:26.329 --> 00:22:30.480
Sorry, I just thought of the word. Exposition?
00:22:30.480 --> 00:22:38.660
Opening exposition. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. They were
00:22:38.660 --> 00:22:41.339
common in that time period. I feel like. I feel
00:22:41.339 --> 00:22:44.319
like. I guess they are a little less common now.
00:22:44.960 --> 00:22:47.920
Yeah. It was just a style back in the day. Yeah.
00:22:47.940 --> 00:22:52.000
No, I agree. So we cut to 1923 in the desert
00:22:52.000 --> 00:22:55.900
in Hamptra. Whatever this place is called. I'm
00:22:55.900 --> 00:22:57.539
going to call it a different name each time.
00:22:57.799 --> 00:23:00.359
Because I don't give a fuck. There's this massive
00:23:00.359 --> 00:23:03.380
battle going on. And we meet our hero, Rick O
00:23:03.380 --> 00:23:06.779
'Connell. Played by Brandon Fraser. He's in the
00:23:06.779 --> 00:23:10.460
French Foreign Legion for some reason. I think
00:23:10.460 --> 00:23:13.539
they say... Do they say that he's American? Yes.
00:23:13.660 --> 00:23:15.980
Later on? Okay, so why is he in the French Foreign
00:23:15.980 --> 00:23:18.900
Legion? I don't think it ever explains why he's
00:23:18.900 --> 00:23:21.380
there. But the French Foreign Legion is known
00:23:21.380 --> 00:23:24.640
for taking... people of all different nationalities
00:23:24.640 --> 00:23:27.759
really well you know what it does say later that
00:23:27.759 --> 00:23:30.380
he just wanted a good time so maybe he just stumbled
00:23:30.380 --> 00:23:35.579
his way into it somehow and then became the well
00:23:35.579 --> 00:23:38.279
i think he was second in command during that
00:23:38.279 --> 00:23:42.259
battle and then the person in command ran away
00:23:42.259 --> 00:23:44.880
so he's in a giant shootout with desert raiders
00:23:44.880 --> 00:23:47.960
benny he says something like i'm always gonna
00:23:47.960 --> 00:23:49.759
be with you and then turns around and fucking
00:23:49.759 --> 00:23:52.299
bolts because benny's a piece of shit but you'll
00:23:52.299 --> 00:23:54.700
find that out later brent frazier just like turns
00:23:54.700 --> 00:23:57.380
around and runs he's just kind of like fuck this
00:23:57.380 --> 00:24:02.160
army and bolts fucking running through these
00:24:02.160 --> 00:24:06.000
runes starts like firing and he comes up to uh
00:24:06.000 --> 00:24:08.680
i don't even know what it is Was it the statue
00:24:08.680 --> 00:24:12.400
of Anubis? Was it Anubis? I believe so. Okay.
00:24:13.059 --> 00:24:16.200
So he comes up to this statue, and the local
00:24:16.200 --> 00:24:19.180
raiders see it, and they fucking just turn around
00:24:19.180 --> 00:24:22.079
and bolt. And you're like, okay, whatever. And
00:24:22.079 --> 00:24:25.960
then the sand underneath him opens up into a
00:24:25.960 --> 00:24:28.940
face. And that's how you figure out that's where
00:24:28.940 --> 00:24:32.119
Imhotep is. I mean, they don't show you that's
00:24:32.119 --> 00:24:34.579
where Imhotep is, but it's... Heavily implied.
00:24:34.799 --> 00:24:37.480
He sees that, freaks the fuck out, starts running,
00:24:37.640 --> 00:24:40.440
and then as he's running away, he looks up and
00:24:40.440 --> 00:24:44.000
sees the Magi. And they're just staring at him
00:24:44.000 --> 00:24:48.700
like the fucking things in Super Mario Galaxy
00:24:48.700 --> 00:24:52.619
up in the corner. Do you remember those? Do you
00:24:52.619 --> 00:24:56.660
have any idea what I'm talking about? Okay. I'll
00:24:56.660 --> 00:24:59.079
show you. I'll show you those. At some point.
00:24:59.200 --> 00:25:01.559
They say they're trees, but they are definitely
00:25:01.559 --> 00:25:04.480
something up on the mountain just staring at
00:25:04.480 --> 00:25:07.819
you. Anyway, the Magi's like, should we kill
00:25:07.819 --> 00:25:13.940
him? And the main Magi's like, nah, he'll die
00:25:13.940 --> 00:25:17.539
in the desert. So then we just cut to fucking
00:25:17.539 --> 00:25:21.079
this librarian who likes to play dominoes with
00:25:21.079 --> 00:25:24.559
library shelves. So first of all, why is she...
00:25:24.559 --> 00:25:29.069
She's up on a ladder. And she's trying to reach
00:25:29.069 --> 00:25:33.710
across the shelf on the ladder and ends up somehow
00:25:33.710 --> 00:25:36.910
getting this rickety -ass ladder, this single
00:25:36.910 --> 00:25:40.769
-frame ladder, onto the two legs and just freestanding
00:25:40.769 --> 00:25:43.670
and balancing. You know, my biggest issue with
00:25:43.670 --> 00:25:46.650
that is not how dumb that move was. It's the
00:25:46.650 --> 00:25:49.430
fact that back in that day, those bookcases would
00:25:49.430 --> 00:25:51.869
have been solid wood and would have been way
00:25:51.869 --> 00:25:55.720
too heavy for her to push over. Yeah, true. mixed
00:25:55.720 --> 00:25:58.400
with those are probably like those are probably
00:25:58.400 --> 00:26:02.500
like skin bound books too so you know that those
00:26:02.500 --> 00:26:05.539
books are heavy as fuck on top of those solid
00:26:05.539 --> 00:26:08.140
wood there's no way that they were all and who
00:26:08.140 --> 00:26:12.900
who puts your bookshelves in an oval in a perfect
00:26:12.900 --> 00:26:16.900
oval yeah like it was set up to just fall over
00:26:16.900 --> 00:26:22.640
just giant dominoes which i mean it's cool but
00:26:22.640 --> 00:26:26.809
also fucking stupid hey listen only americans
00:26:26.809 --> 00:26:29.430
build stuff in grits i don't know what to say
00:26:29.430 --> 00:26:33.450
i guess so we go over she she goes over into
00:26:33.450 --> 00:26:37.349
the other room after that to the it's not trophy
00:26:37.349 --> 00:26:40.289
what's the word that i'm looking for the uh relic
00:26:40.289 --> 00:26:43.630
room treasure room you got a bunch of like sarcophagus
00:26:43.630 --> 00:26:46.490
and shit like that all around and she hears this
00:26:46.490 --> 00:26:49.250
noise it turns out it's her brother jonathan
00:26:49.250 --> 00:26:54.730
which Fuck this guy. I hate this guy for some
00:26:54.730 --> 00:26:57.849
reason. I don't know why. I love Jonathan. Don't
00:26:57.849 --> 00:27:00.529
get me started. Really? He's supposed to be the
00:27:00.529 --> 00:27:06.849
comic relief, but I don't know. I would prefer
00:27:06.849 --> 00:27:10.529
someone that joins the party later over Jonathan.
00:27:10.789 --> 00:27:13.309
But we'll get into him. I disagree. I think Jonathan
00:27:13.309 --> 00:27:15.470
was a great addition to the movie. I think he
00:27:15.470 --> 00:27:20.839
was comedy relief done right. There's something
00:27:20.839 --> 00:27:23.799
about his character that I just want to punch
00:27:23.799 --> 00:27:27.579
in the face. But then again, seeing Brendan Fraser
00:27:27.579 --> 00:27:31.480
do it for me, kinda. So Jonathan has, he found
00:27:31.480 --> 00:27:35.559
this map and this puzzle box, which later turns
00:27:35.559 --> 00:27:37.900
out is a key, but we don't know that yet. And
00:27:37.900 --> 00:27:43.180
the map pretty much just shows this lost city.
00:27:43.460 --> 00:27:46.400
So they go and show the boss. They show, what's
00:27:46.400 --> 00:27:49.670
her name, Evelyn? Yeah. So they go and show Evelyn's
00:27:49.670 --> 00:27:53.130
boss this map, and he's looking at it, and this
00:27:53.130 --> 00:27:58.109
dumbass fucking sets it on fire. Which, I can't
00:27:58.109 --> 00:28:01.990
think of what this guy's name is, but he was
00:28:01.990 --> 00:28:10.450
one of the bigwigs from Mr. Deeds, and all I
00:28:10.450 --> 00:28:13.390
can think about is him talking about Wendy's
00:28:13.390 --> 00:28:16.410
Frosties. So while he's setting this on fire,
00:28:16.619 --> 00:28:19.779
fire i just am imagining him eating a frosty
00:28:19.779 --> 00:28:22.400
for some reason jonathan's like i got this from
00:28:22.400 --> 00:28:26.420
a guy rick o 'connell they go to meet him he's
00:28:26.420 --> 00:28:30.400
in fucking jail and not only is he in jail for
00:28:30.400 --> 00:28:34.319
having a good time but he's about to get hanged
00:28:34.319 --> 00:28:38.279
to death for having a really good time i kind
00:28:38.279 --> 00:28:41.779
of want to know what he did because to me it
00:28:41.779 --> 00:28:46.440
kind of sounds like Maybe he fucked the warden's
00:28:46.440 --> 00:28:51.480
woman, the same thing that Imhotep did just 3
00:28:51.480 --> 00:28:53.839
,000 years later. It would be some poetic irony.
00:28:54.220 --> 00:28:57.339
Yes, it would. So they're like, you're here just
00:28:57.339 --> 00:29:00.779
in time to watch this man hang. So they put him
00:29:00.779 --> 00:29:04.500
in the gallows. Evelyn's trying to convince the
00:29:04.500 --> 00:29:08.880
warden to be like, no, let's save his life. He
00:29:08.880 --> 00:29:13.440
knows how to get to this lost city. And warden's
00:29:13.440 --> 00:29:17.410
like, I don't need money. And then proceeds to
00:29:17.410 --> 00:29:21.990
be all disgusting towards her. And she's like,
00:29:22.049 --> 00:29:25.890
no. We're about 25 % of what we find. Well after
00:29:25.890 --> 00:29:29.789
this man has been hanging, like his neck, they
00:29:29.789 --> 00:29:32.130
dropped him and his neck did not break. So he's
00:29:32.130 --> 00:29:36.430
gagging on this fucking rope. And you get to
00:29:36.430 --> 00:29:39.880
watch him. dangle for a very uncomfortable amount
00:29:39.880 --> 00:29:42.579
of time especially knowing that he blacked out
00:29:42.579 --> 00:29:45.779
during this part it's not great so evelyn's like
00:29:45.779 --> 00:29:50.779
25 man's like cut him down so then we cut to
00:29:50.779 --> 00:29:53.359
a steamboat or getting outside of a steamboat
00:29:53.359 --> 00:29:59.980
ready to get on and jonathan evelyn and rick
00:29:59.980 --> 00:30:03.579
all meet up and then the fucking warden shows
00:30:03.579 --> 00:30:07.359
up and he's like I'm here to collect. Do you
00:30:07.359 --> 00:30:10.160
know who this warden reminds me of? No. I can't
00:30:10.160 --> 00:30:13.019
think of his name, but in The Phantom Menace,
00:30:13.119 --> 00:30:18.980
Star Wars Episode I, they go to a junkyard parts
00:30:18.980 --> 00:30:23.839
dealer. That alien that runs that parts dealership,
00:30:23.880 --> 00:30:28.180
I think, was it for C -3PO? I forget why they
00:30:28.180 --> 00:30:31.900
were at that parts dealership. That alien reminds
00:30:31.900 --> 00:30:35.809
me of this warden for some reason. I could see
00:30:35.809 --> 00:30:40.230
that. So they get onto the boat. They're going
00:30:40.230 --> 00:30:42.750
down. They meet another group of people that
00:30:42.750 --> 00:30:44.950
are basically like, we're going to race you to
00:30:44.950 --> 00:30:48.089
the whatever. They find out that Benny is on
00:30:48.089 --> 00:30:50.710
their way there too. None of that really matters.
00:30:50.789 --> 00:30:53.690
The Magi comes onto the boat and tries to steal
00:30:53.690 --> 00:30:57.289
the map and the key. But does one of them shoot
00:30:57.289 --> 00:31:01.109
him? I feel like the Magi gets shot by... I believe.
00:31:01.710 --> 00:31:03.630
Yeah, at one point during the actual battle of
00:31:03.630 --> 00:31:05.349
the boat where they're fighting and trying to
00:31:05.349 --> 00:31:09.230
not die. Yeah, I believe so. I'm talking about
00:31:09.230 --> 00:31:12.529
the main guy who sneaks into the room. The main
00:31:12.529 --> 00:31:17.730
magi who sneaks in. I don't believe so. No? Okay.
00:31:17.890 --> 00:31:22.430
Because there is a huge gun battle. And somehow
00:31:22.430 --> 00:31:26.269
everybody just ends up jumping. Oh, the boat
00:31:26.269 --> 00:31:28.769
catches on fire. So everybody jumps off the boat
00:31:28.769 --> 00:31:32.329
into the river. Benny's like, we're going to
00:31:32.329 --> 00:31:34.910
beat you or some bullshit like that. And Rick
00:31:34.910 --> 00:31:39.210
goes, hey, looks to me, you're on the wrong side
00:31:39.210 --> 00:31:42.690
of the river. I don't know why that line sticks
00:31:42.690 --> 00:31:48.230
with me. But I have a vivid memory of that line.
00:31:48.329 --> 00:31:53.430
I don't know why. It is a great scene. It sets
00:31:53.430 --> 00:31:56.210
up, if you haven't figured it out at this point
00:31:56.210 --> 00:31:59.589
in the movie. It sets up Benny as an idiot, and
00:31:59.589 --> 00:32:02.529
I think just driving that fact home is what made
00:32:02.529 --> 00:32:06.289
this particular scene so iconic to so many watchers.
00:32:07.069 --> 00:32:10.009
I'm sorry, I was expecting you to say, like,
00:32:10.049 --> 00:32:13.490
traitor or something like that, so I turned off
00:32:13.490 --> 00:32:16.130
my mic to take a sip of water, and when you said
00:32:16.130 --> 00:32:20.809
idiot, I almost spit out all of my water. No,
00:32:20.809 --> 00:32:23.470
no. No, it was set up very early on that he's
00:32:23.470 --> 00:32:26.369
like... cowardly traitor yes i think this is
00:32:26.369 --> 00:32:30.210
where they start showing him for being the the
00:32:30.210 --> 00:32:34.369
idiot the incompetent fool that he is yep so
00:32:34.369 --> 00:32:40.069
they end up they end up literally racing which
00:32:40.069 --> 00:32:42.930
i don't understand why they were racing they're
00:32:42.930 --> 00:32:45.910
they are on cam it was just a side bet that they
00:32:45.910 --> 00:32:50.529
made oh that's that's right yep as the What was
00:32:50.529 --> 00:32:52.829
it, the sun was rising or falling and showing
00:32:52.829 --> 00:32:57.549
the city through the mirage? Yeah. Through the
00:32:57.549 --> 00:33:01.589
haze? Yep. They made that side bet. Yeah, okay,
00:33:01.750 --> 00:33:05.230
that is right. Because they did, and even on
00:33:05.230 --> 00:33:08.769
the boat they made the bet of, we're gonna, you
00:33:08.769 --> 00:33:10.690
know, we'll get there first, blah blah blah.
00:33:10.710 --> 00:33:13.730
Once again, it's not needed, it really doesn't
00:33:13.730 --> 00:33:17.390
matter. Because once they get there, it's kind
00:33:17.390 --> 00:33:22.809
of a free -for -all anyway. So everybody starts
00:33:22.809 --> 00:33:26.210
digging. Evelyn finds a hidden chamber and ends
00:33:26.210 --> 00:33:29.710
up finding the Book of the Dead. And the Americans
00:33:29.710 --> 00:33:32.670
dig in a completely different spot and end up
00:33:32.670 --> 00:33:36.569
finding Imhotep's sarcophagus, which I think
00:33:36.569 --> 00:33:39.509
it's the American group has this cool thing where
00:33:39.509 --> 00:33:42.650
they find, before they find the sarcophagus,
00:33:42.750 --> 00:33:46.269
they open up a panel and end up getting shot
00:33:46.269 --> 00:33:50.099
with acid or something. Yeah, they were breaking
00:33:50.099 --> 00:33:54.920
open some wall to the actual holding place of
00:33:54.920 --> 00:33:58.420
the sarcophagus, and they made sure the Egyptian
00:33:58.420 --> 00:34:02.740
workers were the ones to open it, just in case.
00:34:03.119 --> 00:34:05.819
Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, because as you find out,
00:34:05.819 --> 00:34:08.539
these Americans are assholes, but whatever. For
00:34:08.539 --> 00:34:11.559
some reason, Evelyn's super excited about the
00:34:11.559 --> 00:34:13.679
Book of the Dead, which, I mean, it is a pretty
00:34:13.679 --> 00:34:19.639
fucking cool -ass book. Big... metal book locked
00:34:19.639 --> 00:34:22.980
with a puzzle key so jonathan steals the key
00:34:22.980 --> 00:34:28.400
opens it and evelyn decides to you know what
00:34:28.400 --> 00:34:32.719
you do with agent texts that have quote -unquote
00:34:32.719 --> 00:34:37.179
curses around them read it out loud you know
00:34:37.179 --> 00:34:39.619
because that that always ends very well for everyone
00:34:39.619 --> 00:34:42.460
she ends up chanting a spell from the book the
00:34:42.460 --> 00:34:46.920
wind howls the sand shifts ghostly screams that
00:34:46.920 --> 00:34:49.800
go through the tombs and you know emotep wakes
00:34:49.800 --> 00:34:56.539
up so when when emotep first shows up he's like
00:34:56.539 --> 00:34:59.420
half mummified which i think i think looks really
00:34:59.420 --> 00:35:04.579
cool definitely the cgi is definitely aged but
00:35:04.579 --> 00:35:07.400
i still think that it looks really cool that
00:35:07.400 --> 00:35:09.440
like he's half see -through and all this other
00:35:09.440 --> 00:35:12.860
shit but basically he wants to resurrect his
00:35:12.860 --> 00:35:16.719
mistress so in order to do that he needs a human
00:35:16.719 --> 00:35:19.559
sacrifice and evelyn's the only female i feel
00:35:19.559 --> 00:35:21.960
like that's really the only reason they say that
00:35:21.960 --> 00:35:25.679
they look the same but i don't see it there was
00:35:25.679 --> 00:35:28.659
a passing resemblance as well as i think she
00:35:28.659 --> 00:35:32.519
had on was it a necklace or something i don't
00:35:32.519 --> 00:35:35.320
quite remember but something she had reminded
00:35:35.320 --> 00:35:39.480
him yeah i i can see that which is another reason
00:35:39.480 --> 00:35:45.309
why If you're going on an archaeology dig, don't
00:35:45.309 --> 00:35:48.849
put on things that you find. Like, I just feel
00:35:48.849 --> 00:35:52.429
like that's basic. You know, this shit is probably
00:35:52.429 --> 00:35:56.070
cursed. It's Dungeon Exploring 101. Always identify
00:35:56.070 --> 00:35:59.170
objects before you put them on. Like, have these
00:35:59.170 --> 00:36:01.289
people not watch Courage. That's all I'm going
00:36:01.289 --> 00:36:04.949
to say. Our favorite purple dog. Purple doggy.
00:36:05.949 --> 00:36:11.030
So, he wants to... resurrect his mistress, and
00:36:11.030 --> 00:36:14.650
he chooses Evelyn for that. So, in order for
00:36:14.650 --> 00:36:18.130
him to regenerate his body, he has to, like,
00:36:18.250 --> 00:36:24.829
I guess suck the life out of normal people? It
00:36:24.829 --> 00:36:27.769
seems like, at least at first, initially, he
00:36:27.769 --> 00:36:30.550
was just taking body parts that he needed. So,
00:36:30.630 --> 00:36:35.090
he had no eyes, so he took the guy's eyes. Now,
00:36:35.090 --> 00:36:37.710
why he... took the guy's eyes who needed glasses
00:36:37.710 --> 00:36:41.570
i don't know but yeah yeah true but i mean choice
00:36:41.570 --> 00:36:45.929
what the other thing too he took he takes the
00:36:45.929 --> 00:36:48.909
eyes but he doesn't take anything else from this
00:36:48.909 --> 00:36:54.789
man until later yes they catch up with him later
00:36:54.789 --> 00:36:57.750
like why couldn't you just do everything all
00:36:57.750 --> 00:37:00.550
of that one time didn't have the power i guess
00:37:00.550 --> 00:37:03.510
he needed to take a nap you can't say he's not
00:37:03.510 --> 00:37:07.340
committed He came back to finish the job. No,
00:37:07.340 --> 00:37:11.119
he didn't. No, he didn't. He did not come much
00:37:11.119 --> 00:37:13.739
later. He did not come back to finish the job
00:37:13.739 --> 00:37:17.300
because he recruits Benny and Benny just does
00:37:17.300 --> 00:37:20.099
the fucking work for him. He just sits there
00:37:20.099 --> 00:37:25.480
wrapped up in a fucking which. OK, he's wearing
00:37:25.480 --> 00:37:28.840
this cool ass mask and like robes and everything,
00:37:29.019 --> 00:37:33.260
which once again. Doesn't fucking make sense
00:37:33.260 --> 00:37:36.980
to me because he's covering himself up for the
00:37:36.980 --> 00:37:40.780
man that he just took the eyes of. The man can't
00:37:40.780 --> 00:37:43.780
see him. Why is he covering himself up? I think
00:37:43.780 --> 00:37:45.519
there's a bit of context clues here you might
00:37:45.519 --> 00:37:48.400
take. He didn't have the power yet to brainwash
00:37:48.400 --> 00:37:50.920
everyone in the city. It was probably a disguise
00:37:50.920 --> 00:37:53.440
so he could walk through without getting stopped
00:37:53.440 --> 00:37:58.679
by cops or whatever. Right. But once you're in
00:37:58.679 --> 00:38:03.059
a room. You don't have to wear it anymore. And
00:38:03.059 --> 00:38:06.280
he had to take it off anyway to get the body
00:38:06.280 --> 00:38:08.500
parts. I will say, the man seems to love his
00:38:08.500 --> 00:38:14.159
drama. And he played into it. It was one point
00:38:14.159 --> 00:38:18.400
for him. What it says to me is the movie didn't
00:38:18.400 --> 00:38:21.500
have enough budget to keep animating this man.
00:38:23.039 --> 00:38:27.019
That's what it feels like to me. Most likely,
00:38:27.199 --> 00:38:31.349
yes. We only have like 15 minutes of animation
00:38:31.349 --> 00:38:36.110
for this, so let's cover him up or something.
00:38:36.369 --> 00:38:38.289
Couldn't blow the whole budget on a few scenes.
00:38:39.329 --> 00:38:41.829
Or maybe they already did. Alright, so pretty
00:38:41.829 --> 00:38:44.550
much Imhotep goes around and just starts killing
00:38:44.550 --> 00:38:47.389
all the Americans, sucking out their life and
00:38:47.389 --> 00:38:50.150
everything, and he ends up coming back to his
00:38:50.150 --> 00:38:56.670
full humanized glory. I mean, to me, he... I
00:38:56.670 --> 00:38:59.469
don't know the actor's name. But I kept thinking
00:38:59.469 --> 00:39:03.889
that it was the lead singer of Disturbed for
00:39:03.889 --> 00:39:07.309
some reason. Maybe it was just because he's bald
00:39:07.309 --> 00:39:10.789
and I was probably very high while watching it.
00:39:10.809 --> 00:39:14.829
I was like, bald man, Disturbed. But nonetheless.
00:39:15.050 --> 00:39:19.110
You got beef with Draymond? Yeah. No, actually,
00:39:19.210 --> 00:39:22.110
I love it. He's the reason I got my lip pierced.
00:39:22.389 --> 00:39:25.030
Like, do you remember the giant spike that I
00:39:25.030 --> 00:39:28.619
put in my lip? Yeah. That was the reason. Anyway,
00:39:28.719 --> 00:39:31.380
so Imhotep ends up, I don't know, kidnapping
00:39:31.380 --> 00:39:34.579
Evelyn somehow? I don't really remember how.
00:39:35.539 --> 00:39:39.559
It was a ultimatum. If she left with him, he
00:39:39.559 --> 00:39:43.659
would have let her group live, which he immediately,
00:39:43.780 --> 00:39:47.239
you know, goes against and backstabs them. That's
00:39:47.239 --> 00:39:49.860
right. Big bad. That was in the middle of the
00:39:49.860 --> 00:39:54.239
street, right? Yeah, with, um... The horde of
00:39:54.239 --> 00:39:57.280
brainwashed civilians. Yeah, which is another
00:39:57.280 --> 00:39:59.639
thing that I didn't fully understand. He can
00:39:59.639 --> 00:40:04.300
just brainwash people? Seems to, yeah. He's in
00:40:04.300 --> 00:40:07.579
his full human glory, as you said. Yeah. He had
00:40:07.579 --> 00:40:12.139
all the mojo. I guess. He ends up taking Evelyn.
00:40:12.260 --> 00:40:14.820
I don't even know. Well, he traveled in the most
00:40:14.820 --> 00:40:18.320
elegant, badass way possible. Well, where? In
00:40:18.320 --> 00:40:21.239
a giant sand tornado. Yes, but where does he
00:40:21.239 --> 00:40:24.980
go? I thought back to the City of the Dead. Okay.
00:40:26.239 --> 00:40:28.599
Okay. I thought I had it written down somewhere,
00:40:28.679 --> 00:40:31.079
but I guess I don't. So anyway, he ends up taking
00:40:31.079 --> 00:40:34.539
Evelyn back to the City of the Dead, I think,
00:40:34.599 --> 00:40:37.920
in that giant sand tornado, like you said, which
00:40:37.920 --> 00:40:44.119
is fucking cool, but also apparently very expensive.
00:40:44.300 --> 00:40:48.750
So Rick ends up meeting up with... Do you remember
00:40:48.750 --> 00:40:52.829
what this man's name is? Yes. Winston. Winston.
00:40:53.250 --> 00:41:00.210
Who is a, what is he, a British? He was a retired
00:41:00.210 --> 00:41:05.969
Royal Air Force pilot. Okay. They basically meet
00:41:05.969 --> 00:41:09.230
up with him and he doesn't really want anything
00:41:09.230 --> 00:41:12.769
to do with them until they're like, we need you
00:41:12.769 --> 00:41:16.050
to fly us somewhere. And he's like, oh, hell
00:41:16.050 --> 00:41:19.719
yes. No, you forget the best part. He wanted
00:41:19.719 --> 00:41:22.699
nothing to do with it until Brendan Fraser's
00:41:22.699 --> 00:41:25.280
character, I can't think of his name, was like,
00:41:25.340 --> 00:41:27.900
it's going to be really dangerous, it's going
00:41:27.900 --> 00:41:29.500
to be an adventure, and you're probably going
00:41:29.500 --> 00:41:33.219
to die. That is right. Because you do meet Winston
00:41:33.219 --> 00:41:36.619
earlier, and he's basically talking about how
00:41:36.619 --> 00:41:41.800
he wished he died. He's a man after my own heart.
00:41:42.420 --> 00:41:47.400
What can I say? I love Winston. You might die.
00:41:48.079 --> 00:41:50.960
Winston's like, alright, cool. Spoiler alert,
00:41:51.019 --> 00:41:54.780
he dies. Winston, no! He gets eaten by a sandstorm.
00:41:54.920 --> 00:41:57.219
I mean, technically, he might have survived.
00:41:58.579 --> 00:42:02.880
No, he died in the crash. Spoiler, the plane
00:42:02.880 --> 00:42:07.420
crashes. And then he lands in quicksand. He might
00:42:07.420 --> 00:42:11.360
have survived. I mean, maybe he was just taking
00:42:11.360 --> 00:42:14.059
a nap, but it quickly turned into a forever nap.
00:42:14.320 --> 00:42:17.380
What? What if that's, like, the real tragedy
00:42:17.380 --> 00:42:21.219
of this movie, is that Winston survived? Like
00:42:21.219 --> 00:42:25.400
the Suicide Squad, the weasel? The weasel. Like,
00:42:25.460 --> 00:42:29.119
for whatever reason, they would not let him die.
00:42:29.340 --> 00:42:31.760
I think it was a tragedy. I think Winston was
00:42:31.760 --> 00:42:35.360
the best character in the movie. Really? Yeah,
00:42:35.420 --> 00:42:38.260
Jonathan number two, though. Yeah, no. We somehow
00:42:38.260 --> 00:42:43.269
missed it, but my favorite character died. He
00:42:43.269 --> 00:42:45.849
got eaten to death by scarab beetles. There was
00:42:45.849 --> 00:42:48.429
a few of them. The prison warden. We didn't get
00:42:48.429 --> 00:42:52.150
there yet. That happened when Imhotep first woke
00:42:52.150 --> 00:42:55.670
up. Dang it. Yeah, he picked out the scarab beetle
00:42:55.670 --> 00:43:01.849
off the... I almost called them caves. But I
00:43:01.849 --> 00:43:04.369
know it's not caves. Maybe you're right. Maybe
00:43:04.369 --> 00:43:07.889
you're right. Yeah, because before Evelyn even
00:43:07.889 --> 00:43:10.599
reads from the book... Jonathan's like, he might
00:43:10.599 --> 00:43:12.539
have been a really shitty person, but at least
00:43:12.539 --> 00:43:15.079
he has good hooch. And he just starts drinking
00:43:15.079 --> 00:43:17.539
all the, I forget what kind of liquor he had
00:43:17.539 --> 00:43:19.659
on him. But yeah. You're right. I do remember
00:43:19.659 --> 00:43:22.900
that now. And I will look it up because I'm curious
00:43:22.900 --> 00:43:24.739
what kind of liquor it was. Of course you are.
00:43:24.820 --> 00:43:28.079
I want to say it was scotch. I was going to say,
00:43:28.079 --> 00:43:31.480
I'm almost sure it was a scotch. And I love my
00:43:31.480 --> 00:43:34.559
scotch. So whilst Winston is flying them in this
00:43:34.559 --> 00:43:37.380
plane. Emotep ends up making the sandstorm come
00:43:37.380 --> 00:43:42.300
through. The fucking sandstorm has his face in
00:43:42.300 --> 00:43:46.199
the sandstorm, which is an awesome shot. Super
00:43:46.199 --> 00:43:50.920
cool. I don't know if it was worth the millions,
00:43:51.000 --> 00:43:54.360
but it is a really cool shot. They end up crashing.
00:43:54.599 --> 00:43:59.920
Winston dies. Raz's heart breaks. Yes. I'll never
00:43:59.920 --> 00:44:02.500
recover. Spoiler, he comes back for The Mummy
00:44:02.500 --> 00:44:05.019
2. He does not, I wish. I'm sorry. Quick little
00:44:05.019 --> 00:44:08.260
fun fact. The total budget of The Mummy was $80
00:44:08.260 --> 00:44:12.960
million. The CGI, the special effects, which
00:44:12.960 --> 00:44:15.719
probably included a little more, but mostly CGI,
00:44:16.039 --> 00:44:19.320
was $15 million. Nearly a quarter of the total
00:44:19.320 --> 00:44:22.960
budget. How much did Brendan Fraser take home?
00:44:23.199 --> 00:44:26.920
Let's see. And I meant to say plot twist, not
00:44:26.920 --> 00:44:30.519
spoiler alert. That Winston comes back. You can't
00:44:30.519 --> 00:44:33.119
get my hopes up like that, man. I'm sorry. What
00:44:33.119 --> 00:44:35.539
if I haven't seen the next movie yet? If you
00:44:35.539 --> 00:44:37.639
haven't seen the next movie yet, we have some
00:44:37.639 --> 00:44:40.960
problems. Yeah. No, don't worry. I've seen them
00:44:40.960 --> 00:44:47.539
all. Plot twist. Winston comes back for the Tom
00:44:47.539 --> 00:44:53.900
Cruise version. Oh, God. No, please. One day
00:44:53.900 --> 00:44:55.460
we're going to have to watch that. All right.
00:44:55.460 --> 00:44:59.119
So, fun fact. As I'm trying to figure out the
00:44:59.119 --> 00:45:02.760
costs in my itemized list of the mummy costs,
00:45:03.019 --> 00:45:06.099
you can get mummified. Really? In the US. Yeah.
00:45:07.179 --> 00:45:11.519
There's apparently a service that covers for
00:45:11.519 --> 00:45:14.920
about 67 grand. You can get mummified. Okay.
00:45:15.179 --> 00:45:17.960
And it's a donation, apparently. A donation to
00:45:17.960 --> 00:45:22.219
what? To get mummified. Like, I have to donate
00:45:22.219 --> 00:45:26.519
my mummified body? No, like, the money you spend
00:45:26.519 --> 00:45:31.340
to get mummified. It says donation. It doesn't
00:45:31.340 --> 00:45:34.860
say cost. It says donation. Okay, so it's a taxable
00:45:34.860 --> 00:45:39.360
thing, so I can write it off. I mean, I think
00:45:39.360 --> 00:45:41.239
your death is almost always a taxable event.
00:45:41.500 --> 00:45:45.179
No, I'm sorry. Yeah, I get what you're saying.
00:45:45.539 --> 00:45:48.340
I'm saying it's always a taxable event in terms
00:45:48.340 --> 00:45:51.420
of either positive or negative on your tax bill.
00:45:52.139 --> 00:45:58.920
Fair, yes. Alright, so... I can't find the cost,
00:45:59.059 --> 00:46:02.420
it seems. How much they paid him? Not, yeah,
00:46:02.559 --> 00:46:06.800
without specifically looking for that one particular...
00:46:06.800 --> 00:46:09.059
I can't get an itemites list. Okay. I have to
00:46:09.059 --> 00:46:11.420
search each one individually. Okay, that's fair.
00:46:12.619 --> 00:46:16.239
If he was smart, I hope he took royalties. Yeah.
00:46:16.420 --> 00:46:19.719
So Rick realizes the only way to defeat Imhotep
00:46:19.719 --> 00:46:24.239
is with the Book of Amun -Ra, which is a gold
00:46:24.239 --> 00:46:27.400
book that can control the undead. And send Imhotep
00:46:27.400 --> 00:46:30.260
back to the underworld. Which, I don't understand
00:46:30.260 --> 00:46:33.679
why it's not the Book of the Dead. Because I
00:46:33.679 --> 00:46:35.420
feel like the Book of the Dead should control
00:46:35.420 --> 00:46:38.679
the dead and not the living, but whatever. So,
00:46:38.699 --> 00:46:42.559
we're back to Imhotep taking Evelyn to sacrifice
00:46:42.559 --> 00:46:48.119
her to bring back his mistress. And so, he wants
00:46:48.119 --> 00:46:53.639
the mistress's soul into Evelyn's body. So I
00:46:53.639 --> 00:46:57.489
feel like it's just... He has a thing for Evelyn.
00:46:57.650 --> 00:47:00.809
He has a sexual attraction toward Evelyn. I want
00:47:00.809 --> 00:47:02.929
to fuck that, but I don't want to cheat on my
00:47:02.929 --> 00:47:07.110
mistress. I mean, that's one way to look at it.
00:47:08.710 --> 00:47:14.289
The look on your face is like, I broke you. I
00:47:14.289 --> 00:47:17.010
was thinking more so, I don't know. That's just
00:47:17.010 --> 00:47:19.780
not the way I would have put it. Fair. Okay,
00:47:19.820 --> 00:47:23.039
so this is where I completely forget everything.
00:47:23.260 --> 00:47:25.880
None of this is coming to mind. I am reading
00:47:25.880 --> 00:47:30.679
it, and I don't... I can't imagine anything that's
00:47:30.679 --> 00:47:34.239
happening. So he ends up bringing back his soldiers.
00:47:34.820 --> 00:47:39.099
He raises them from the dead, and Brendan Fraser,
00:47:39.440 --> 00:47:42.500
O 'Connell, and Jonathan, they have to fight
00:47:42.500 --> 00:47:47.119
off these soldiers, these mummies, while Evelyn
00:47:47.119 --> 00:47:52.550
is trying to... find the right spell to make
00:47:52.550 --> 00:47:56.210
him moral again. Okay. And I think this is a
00:47:56.210 --> 00:47:59.170
key point because throughout this whole movie
00:47:59.170 --> 00:48:03.409
you see both Benny and Jonathan being the comedy
00:48:03.409 --> 00:48:06.949
relief in certain segments but I think this is
00:48:06.949 --> 00:48:11.389
where you see them for who they are truly really
00:48:11.389 --> 00:48:15.570
come to light because as Jonathan has been a
00:48:15.570 --> 00:48:18.519
coward in certain parts of the movie. He steps
00:48:18.519 --> 00:48:21.900
up when he needs to. And then in these moments,
00:48:22.019 --> 00:48:27.820
you'll see Benny being his foil, where he shows
00:48:27.820 --> 00:48:30.039
his true colors and he runs away when he should
00:48:30.039 --> 00:48:33.579
really step up. And that's been a theme for them
00:48:33.579 --> 00:48:35.960
throughout the whole thing. Benny has always
00:48:35.960 --> 00:48:39.039
been a coward and still is. And Jonathan, and
00:48:39.039 --> 00:48:41.099
probably why I like Jonathan, because he is the
00:48:41.099 --> 00:48:43.219
comedy relief, but he does step up when needed.
00:48:43.380 --> 00:48:46.539
You see him really helping here. Okay, that's
00:48:46.539 --> 00:48:49.920
fair. Yeah, I still, I have an issue with him
00:48:49.920 --> 00:48:52.719
and I don't know what it is. But yeah, I will
00:48:52.719 --> 00:48:55.039
say I like Jonathan a whole lot more than Benny.
00:48:55.139 --> 00:48:57.420
Yeah, no, Benny's a cockroach. Speaking of Benny,
00:48:57.500 --> 00:49:00.679
going a little bit off topic here. Benny, one
00:49:00.679 --> 00:49:03.039
of my favorite lines from Benny, aside from the
00:49:03.039 --> 00:49:06.099
river scene where we got all the horses. That's
00:49:06.099 --> 00:49:08.860
what it was. Looks like we got all the horses.
00:49:09.860 --> 00:49:12.039
What was it? What did he say? It was like, you're
00:49:12.039 --> 00:49:15.280
on the wrong side of the river. Yep. Looks like
00:49:15.280 --> 00:49:17.960
we got all the horses. Looks like you're on the
00:49:17.960 --> 00:49:20.980
wrong side of the river. But one of my favorite
00:49:20.980 --> 00:49:24.219
lines by Benny is when after the boat scene,
00:49:24.380 --> 00:49:26.880
after they get to, I forget if this is before
00:49:26.880 --> 00:49:31.219
or after Imhotep wakes up, but O 'Connell finds
00:49:31.219 --> 00:49:35.000
Benny and he says, well, if it ain't my little
00:49:35.000 --> 00:49:39.579
buddy, Benny, I think I'll kill you. And Benny's,
00:49:39.679 --> 00:49:42.960
think of my children. You don't have any children.
00:49:43.739 --> 00:49:48.250
Someday I might. So that happens on the boat.
00:49:49.489 --> 00:49:53.469
That happens on the boat. Rick comes up and he
00:49:53.469 --> 00:49:57.989
shows Evelyn this giant pack of weapons. And
00:49:57.989 --> 00:50:01.570
he sees something off in the corner. So he goes
00:50:01.570 --> 00:50:05.369
after and pulls it. Pulls Benny out of the corner
00:50:05.369 --> 00:50:08.110
hiding. Yes, it's a funny scene. I just feel
00:50:08.110 --> 00:50:11.269
like that whole boat scene is just kind of filler
00:50:11.269 --> 00:50:15.179
more so than anything. That's why I kind of breezed
00:50:15.179 --> 00:50:17.639
over it. I can see that. I think it was a way
00:50:17.639 --> 00:50:20.900
to set up the Magi getting involved more directly.
00:50:21.099 --> 00:50:25.340
And I think it would have been if they went more
00:50:25.340 --> 00:50:29.840
of the mysterious, you know, secret group trying
00:50:29.840 --> 00:50:32.199
to stop them route. I think it would have played
00:50:32.199 --> 00:50:34.300
in a lot better because that would have just
00:50:34.300 --> 00:50:36.960
been like the first event of multiple. Yeah.
00:50:37.320 --> 00:50:40.320
I think we've, I did miss one thing that I did
00:50:40.320 --> 00:50:43.159
want to say. There is a, there's a scene where
00:50:43.159 --> 00:50:47.579
you see who the leader of the Magi is. And it's
00:50:47.579 --> 00:50:50.880
the motherfucking boss who set the damn map on
00:50:50.880 --> 00:50:54.420
fire in the first place. So he ends up setting
00:50:54.420 --> 00:50:57.800
the map on fire. That way they can't go find
00:50:57.800 --> 00:51:01.320
it at all. As a way to stop them. Yeah. Yeah.
00:51:01.619 --> 00:51:06.059
But little did they know that Rick, Rick O 'Connell.
00:51:07.420 --> 00:51:09.699
memorize the damn map because he's autistic.
00:51:10.000 --> 00:51:12.599
Alright, so anyway, we end up getting this big
00:51:12.599 --> 00:51:16.579
climatic battle. Rick's fighting mummified priests,
00:51:16.780 --> 00:51:20.059
chopping off limbs and shit. Jonathan's frantically
00:51:20.059 --> 00:51:22.760
trying to read hieroglyphs from the gold book
00:51:22.760 --> 00:51:25.960
while Evelyn is seconds away from being sacrificed.
00:51:26.380 --> 00:51:29.179
Finally, Jonathan recites the right incantation.
00:51:29.559 --> 00:51:32.800
Imhotep loses his immortality. Rick stabs him
00:51:32.800 --> 00:51:35.900
through the gut. Imhotep collapses in a pool
00:51:35.900 --> 00:51:39.579
of souls, dramatically declaring that death is
00:51:39.579 --> 00:51:44.500
only the beginning. Because, you know, Mummy
00:51:44.500 --> 00:51:48.739
2 needed to happen. Gotta set up the sequel.
00:51:49.179 --> 00:51:51.699
Yep. The whole city starts collapsing into the
00:51:51.699 --> 00:51:55.980
sand. Our party barely escapes on camels as the
00:51:55.980 --> 00:52:00.000
whole city just sinks back into the desert. And
00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:02.280
of course, they ride off into the sunset with
00:52:02.280 --> 00:52:05.380
the treasure. Because no adventure movie is complete
00:52:05.380 --> 00:52:09.019
without a pile of gold. And the best part is,
00:52:09.139 --> 00:52:12.780
because the warden died, they didn't have to
00:52:12.780 --> 00:52:16.260
share it. They didn't have to split it four ways,
00:52:16.320 --> 00:52:20.199
only three ways. But in reality, it only ended
00:52:20.199 --> 00:52:24.260
up having to get split two ways. Well, actually,
00:52:24.340 --> 00:52:27.599
no. I guess they split it three ways. Yeah. Think
00:52:27.599 --> 00:52:30.139
about that. So they split it three ways, right?
00:52:30.880 --> 00:52:33.519
Between O 'Connell, Evelyn, and... Jonathan?
00:52:33.699 --> 00:52:37.280
Yeah. But then O 'Connell and Evelyn start banging
00:52:37.280 --> 00:52:41.639
and have a fucking child and get married. So
00:52:41.639 --> 00:52:45.420
now theirs becomes shared. So they get two -thirds.
00:52:45.539 --> 00:52:46.860
They definitely got the better end of that stick.
00:52:47.119 --> 00:52:51.239
Definitely. Definitely. The part of that scene
00:52:51.239 --> 00:52:53.039
that I like is that they didn't even know they
00:52:53.039 --> 00:52:55.800
had the treasure. Because if my memory serves
00:52:55.800 --> 00:52:57.760
me right, it was Benny that was taking the treasure
00:52:57.760 --> 00:53:01.179
out. And he got greedy and went back in. And
00:53:01.179 --> 00:53:04.090
that's how he ended up dying. but they were able
00:53:04.090 --> 00:53:08.409
to live or take the gold that he snuck out really
00:53:08.409 --> 00:53:13.849
i see i don't remember any of this i i don't
00:53:13.849 --> 00:53:16.630
know if i fell asleep but this is just like a
00:53:16.630 --> 00:53:19.510
black void in my head but well i mean you have
00:53:19.510 --> 00:53:23.630
a lot of those that's fine i mean yeah um but
00:53:23.630 --> 00:53:27.949
yeah that that's that's the mummy so what uh
00:53:27.949 --> 00:53:30.710
what do we think about this overall i mean what
00:53:30.960 --> 00:53:33.239
What can I say? It's a classic. I mean, I grew
00:53:33.239 --> 00:53:35.860
up with it, so, you know, I have my rose -colored
00:53:35.860 --> 00:53:41.099
glasses on. But it's just a good adventure flick.
00:53:41.420 --> 00:53:43.780
I don't see what you can hate about it. Okay.
00:53:44.719 --> 00:53:48.099
I have problems with it. Mostly just a lot of
00:53:48.099 --> 00:53:50.840
the logic in the beginning. A lot of this could
00:53:50.840 --> 00:53:54.920
have been avoided if Emotep just fucked a baker.
00:53:55.119 --> 00:53:57.699
A bread maker, you mean. A bread baker, yeah.
00:53:57.940 --> 00:54:00.199
Bread maker. Bread maker. Bread maker, yeah.
00:54:00.670 --> 00:54:04.309
Anyway, so I definitely liked this movie. I did
00:54:04.309 --> 00:54:08.389
enjoy it. I found it funny at times. I found
00:54:08.389 --> 00:54:11.150
it suspenseful at times. Literally anything's
00:54:11.150 --> 00:54:13.469
better than the third one. I thought the third
00:54:13.469 --> 00:54:16.769
one had issues, but I enjoyed it. I turned that
00:54:16.769 --> 00:54:18.170
show off. But again, it was a childhood movie
00:54:18.170 --> 00:54:20.610
for me, so I could be pissed. One out of five
00:54:20.610 --> 00:54:23.389
stars. What would you give this? And, okay, you
00:54:23.389 --> 00:54:28.130
are allowed to give it five stars for Nostald.
00:54:28.889 --> 00:54:30.630
you're allowed to rate it whatever the fuck you
00:54:30.630 --> 00:54:35.530
want you don't feel like you have to like take
00:54:35.530 --> 00:54:39.809
points off for anything i i'll have to say i
00:54:39.809 --> 00:54:42.309
gotta give it five i just yeah i'm trying to
00:54:42.309 --> 00:54:45.969
think of other childhood movies and it's up there
00:54:45.969 --> 00:54:48.190
if i can't give it a five i'd still give it a
00:54:48.190 --> 00:54:53.469
four it's just a timeless classic to me i'm thinking
00:54:53.469 --> 00:54:56.869
i'm thinking maybe a four it's it's definitely
00:54:56.869 --> 00:54:59.840
something that i'll watch Again. Maybe not anytime
00:54:59.840 --> 00:55:02.380
soon. I did watch it like three or four times.
00:55:02.480 --> 00:55:06.320
Maybe five or six times for this episode. I'm
00:55:06.320 --> 00:55:08.539
not gonna... I remember watching it once just
00:55:08.539 --> 00:55:11.940
to watch it. Then I watched it again because
00:55:11.940 --> 00:55:14.880
this was supposed to be recorded months ago.
00:55:15.719 --> 00:55:19.159
But it didn't happen. And then I remember watching
00:55:19.159 --> 00:55:24.500
it again to take notes on. And then... watching
00:55:24.500 --> 00:55:27.360
it again because i didn't finish taking notes
00:55:27.360 --> 00:55:29.760
but all of those times i don't remember how it
00:55:29.760 --> 00:55:33.739
ends like that that that's why i it's losing
00:55:33.739 --> 00:55:36.699
a star for me because i don't know what if i
00:55:36.699 --> 00:55:39.800
fell asleep i don't know if it just like lost
00:55:39.800 --> 00:55:42.599
my interest at a certain point but the fact that
00:55:42.599 --> 00:55:47.880
it can do that makes me a little hesitant to
00:55:47.880 --> 00:55:50.800
give it five stars i mean that's fair now that
00:55:50.800 --> 00:55:54.469
i can respect that that being said It's a fun
00:55:54.469 --> 00:55:56.789
movie. I'm going to have a fun time. I will watch
00:55:56.789 --> 00:55:59.329
it again. I don't think it's a perfect movie.
00:55:59.829 --> 00:56:04.110
I can respect that. In light of that, I think
00:56:04.110 --> 00:56:10.769
I will give it a 4 .5. That may be a point, give
00:56:10.769 --> 00:56:14.289
or take, for nostalgia factor. It's not a perfect
00:56:14.289 --> 00:56:19.909
movie, but it's a good solid 4 .5 for me. I feel
00:56:19.909 --> 00:56:23.170
like we need to get rid of the star system. And
00:56:23.170 --> 00:56:26.670
maybe just make like a yes or no system. Why
00:56:26.670 --> 00:56:30.769
not both? Why not both? Yes and no? Yeah. What
00:56:30.769 --> 00:56:32.730
do you mean? It can be a four and a half movie
00:56:32.730 --> 00:56:35.590
and you never want to watch it again. Okay, that's
00:56:35.590 --> 00:56:39.369
fair. I guess like maybe we'll like, I don't
00:56:39.369 --> 00:56:41.769
know, we'll workshop that one. It'll make our
00:56:41.769 --> 00:56:45.909
reviews easier at the end. Yeah. If we can just
00:56:45.909 --> 00:56:48.050
like yes or no. But yeah, anything else that
00:56:48.050 --> 00:56:50.190
you want to say about The Mummy? No. I think
00:56:50.190 --> 00:56:52.630
we covered pretty much everything. that i wanted
00:56:52.630 --> 00:56:55.510
to uh i'll just add a little advice for all our
00:56:55.510 --> 00:56:57.690
listeners never read from the book of the dead
00:56:57.690 --> 00:57:01.590
you know what never read from any ancient book
00:57:01.590 --> 00:57:04.690
that you find buried in the fucking sand never
00:57:04.690 --> 00:57:07.710
anything buried in the sand maybe just don't
00:57:07.710 --> 00:57:10.510
touch because either a it's going to be cursed
00:57:10.510 --> 00:57:12.849
or b it's going to be like battery acid that
00:57:12.849 --> 00:57:14.809
you find on the beach or something anything that
00:57:14.809 --> 00:57:16.969
survived that long is either immensely valuable
00:57:16.969 --> 00:57:20.590
or definitely cursed yeah and if and if it's
00:57:20.590 --> 00:57:24.000
valuable You're going to break it. Let's be honest.
00:57:24.500 --> 00:57:27.739
You're a clumsy little fuck, and you're going
00:57:27.739 --> 00:57:30.900
to break it. So that was 1999's The Mummy, with
00:57:30.900 --> 00:57:33.719
Brandon Fraser, Rachel Weisz, and my favorite,
00:57:33.920 --> 00:57:37.039
John Hanna. Thank you guys for listening to the
00:57:37.039 --> 00:57:40.739
Tapeworm Podcast. Join us next episode when we
00:57:40.739 --> 00:57:44.380
talk about Georgia the Jungle from 1997. Apparently
00:57:44.380 --> 00:57:46.099
we're just sticking with some Brandon Fraser,
00:57:46.420 --> 00:57:49.340
because fuck it, why not? Guess it's Brandon
00:57:49.340 --> 00:57:54.500
Fraser month. Fuck it. I'm down for it. If you
00:57:54.500 --> 00:57:57.619
like this podcast, please rate it in your podcast
00:57:57.619 --> 00:58:00.599
app. Please subscribe. We'll see you next time.
00:58:00.679 --> 00:58:00.980
Bye.