WEBVTT
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Welcome everyone to Secular AA's global tour of monthly speaker meetings featuring secular AA groups across the globe.
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I am Mariani and that's Alcohol Free and have a few announcements before we welcome our guests from the Secular Book Study AA group.
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I want to thank everyone supporting this monthly meeting with spreading the word, hosting, security by recording, editing, and postings.
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And everyone else here too for showing up, but namely Tony, Claudia, and Veronica and Fabio.
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Thank you for all your behind the scenes work.
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Regarding simultaneous translation, thanks to Fabio and Veronica, we can provide simultaneous translation from English to Spanish to Spanish to English.
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To choose to listen in English only or Spanish only, find the globe icon labeled interpretation on your toolbar and select your preferred language.
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On a mobile device, you'll have to select the more or three dots and select the language.
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Today's speakers from Secular Book Study will be presenting in English, followed by an open discussion from participants who can share in English or in Spanish, because you will be translated into the other language simultaneously.
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Today's 90-minute event is brought to you by Secular AA.
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Our format is secular.
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The people who are here all have different beliefs, and we hope that everyone can feel free to express themselves without fear of dissuasion or persuasion.
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We do not use prayer from any religions in the meeting.
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And now I have a couple of announcements.
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And first of all, registration and held hotel booking are open for secular AA's next in-person international conference taking place in Arizona.
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That's IXA Phoenix 2026.
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The dates and location are set for November 13th through 15th at the Hilton Phoenix Resort in the Peak.
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In the chat, you'll find the link to register for$150, the link to book hotel suites at a conference rate of$154 a night, which is offered from November 10th through the 18th.
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So three days before and three days after the actual conference.
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Find links to the Ixafenix web web pages also in the chat.
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New today.
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So please come.
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And in the spirit, two things important I'm going to announce about happening then.
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In the spirit of rotation, there will be several vacancies to fill on the board of Secular AA.
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And folks interested in nominating themselves or others will find links to information on getting names before the general membership.
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And second, we need a location for the next in-person international conference of Secular AA after 2026 in Phoenix for 2028.
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Groups interested in nominating their city can find links to instructions in the chat as well.
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Okay, and before I hand over the meeting, let me just give you a preview.
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Next month on the first Sunday, we are featuring We Agnostics of Michiana.
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They're on the border of Michigan and Indiana, and that's September 6th.
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Simultaneous translation, same uh Zoom channel and time and everything, and that information will be added to the chat.
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And now for the main event, we are very pleased to welcome today's MC, Stephanie F, who will introduce the group, the Secular Book Study, and himself, as well as today's speakers, Joe S, who's uh hailing from North Dakota right now, aren't you?
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Tony F out of Pittsburgh, Robin in Australia, and the ever-grateful Jeb of Colorado.
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Um they will share for about 15, 20 minutes each, followed by opportunities for all participants to share about three minutes each.
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The meeting usually lasts about 90 minutes, but we're happy to keep going for all who wish to share.
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May and welcome everyone here and welcome Secular Book Study group.
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Uh and Stephanie, uh please unmute to begin.
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Hello, my name is Stephanie, and I'm an alcoholic.
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It's my honor today to introduce the Secular Book Study.
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Uh, this meeting began four years ago and was originally called the Secular Big Book Study.
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As uh, you know, for the first several years, uh the um group came together once a week and would read different parts of the big book and share from a secular perspective.
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Um in about at about the end of 2025, it's being the plain language big book.
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Um the group then determined to uh read uh some different recovery materials.
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Uh so uh the first book that we started with was Dale Kay's uh A Secular Sobriety uh of 12 secular steps by Bill W.
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No, not that Bill W, a different Bill W.
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Uh and uh finally we are now reading uh One Big Ten, which was published by the great uh the AA Great Vine.
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So as I said, it started four years ago, uh, but the format has remained largely the same.
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Uh first we come together and we started out uh by uh having an actual person reading the text, and we've since moved on to using an AI uh version of uh somebody reading the text to us.
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And then uh we would share on the reading, um, just taking turns in, you know, kind of the typical fashion.
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And we um also uh leave room, of course, for anybody who needed a check-in for the day, uh keeping the individual recovery at the forefront of our meeting.
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So I wanted to take just a minute to uh read to you what we read at the beginning of every meeting, which is our welcome statement.
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Studying the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous has been a formidable task for those of us with a secular perspective or a non-religious mind.
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The words as written, the religious angle, and the time in which it was penned has challenged some alcoholics to weave the language into modern day terms and modern day realities.
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At the time it was first published, there were only a handful of groups of sober alcoholics banded together in a common union.
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To others, it was the only communication they had from other alcoholics that had an answer to a seemingly hopeless situation.
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From this text, millions have gone on to a lifetime of sobriety, unity, love, and service to others.
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Without the efforts of the founding members in their selfless pursuit to bring their message to other alcoholics, there would be no such thing as Alcoholics Anonymous, and those millions that have found a way out might have perished or worse.
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As we read the words today, let's keep in mind the honest desire the writers had to save as many of us as they could using the language that they had, living in the world they did, and sharing the personal experiences they survived.
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Uh, I started this group really close to after uh I first got sober.
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And within three days, this was one of the first groups that I really started doing service with uh and have really found a group of very caring people that I've been able to learn from as well as share with.
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So it's my honor to be introducing the secular book study to you today.
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Uh so with no further ado, I will introduce our first speaker uh who does so much work for this group.
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So come on in, Tony F.
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Thanks, Stephanie.
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Hi, I'm Tony.
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I'm an alcoholic.
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And um probably recognize me from this series if you come to the Global Speaker Tour a lot.
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I'm usually the person that doesn't talk that much, nowhere near as much as, say, Margarita.
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Um, but I'm coming today to represent just a one of the small number of people at the Secular Book Study Group.
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And everything, I agree with everything that uh Stephanie shared, but I wanted to also offer a little bit of the context of like why it's important and valuable to me.
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Um so I I'm sober for about six and a half years now.
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I live over in Pittsburgh, PA.
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And I technically, I think, you know, my my early sobriety was during COVID, during lockdown.
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But I got sober right before.
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In fact, my first my month, my month of IOP when I self-detoxed like a moron and nearly killed myself with you know trying to cut clean all of a sudden, was in those little tiny rooms full of people where you're all like uncomfortably staring at each other in a circle.
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Great for you know pandemics.
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Um, but then right after that month of IOP, then the lockdown happened and I was faced with not being able to go anywhere, which was great for me because previously I would have wanted to go to my old pub downtown, and um now it was shut down.
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So all I could do was go to online recovery meetings and try to find a place of home for myself.
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I'd learn some tricks, I'd learn some some education on the um how to stay sober at the basic level from IOP.
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What do they call it?
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You know, IOP is a great intensive outpatient recovery or rehab is a great place to learn AA while paying five, ten thousand dollars.
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Um anyway.
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So during that, during that early time of my recovery, I was searching for a group, and I did find my home group, which is another group, but I had a dabbled in traditional meetings.
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And I had actually in my IOP, I had been looking for a way to connect with the big book.
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I was motivated by my recovery.
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In fact, I bought a copy of the big book, fourth edition, and bought a friend of it, or a friend of mine in recovery the same time, a copy, cracked it open, got through you know the first two or three chapters, and it hit we agnostics like, what the fuck is this shit?
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Excuse me, sorry for swearing.
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Um, I was really turned off by the traditional language, and it was hard for me to get past the language there to see the the voice of recovery behind the poetry of the Christian backing, uh Christian background, rather.
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And I put it back down for a long time.
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You know, I worked my recovery program, but a lot of it was through, you know, AAA Agnostica, which is a great resource for people doing secular recovery.
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And I very rarely really cracked open the fake book.
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And um until I had a my first sponsee, they were interested in getting more connected with traditional literature.
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They wanted to learn more about that and incorporate that into the recovery, and they actually drove to start the secular big book study group and start a forum for people, like-minded people, secular recovery people, to come together in a place of uh of a mutual approach to approach the big book and the 12 and 12 and come from a perspective of okay, what what value can we pull from this that is well while acknowledging or at least understanding there's a mutual acknowledgement of this um God-filled language and the and the challenges it offers.
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So it's like acknowledgement of the challenges and pulling of the of the value.
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And I think it was great.
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We started much more formal with it.
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We actually assigned presenters for each each week was a different chapter of the big book, and we had people presenting it.
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They had like presentations lined up, a lot of work.
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Very hard, very hard to maintain, too.
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There was a f there was an intention of recording them and having them available as like little seminars on a website, and that didn't pan out.
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But what did come from it was I think even more valuable, which was a tight-knit group of I would estimate anywhere from 20 to 28 people a week keeping coming in.
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Um, not the same people even.
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We have a lot of newcomers that come into that come together to read the current reading or listen to the current reading and offer their thoughts and the value that the reading may have, either being familiar with it already or not.
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For me, it's been a wonderful opportunity to hear from people in the past who are who are just like me.
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You know, they may have different backgrounds, they may have different interpretations of how the world works or whatever.
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Um but the perspective of how to stay sober is the same, um, or at least the desire to stay sober is the same.
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It was important for me to actually maintain this connection and this ability to connect with other people and traditional, more traditional A backgrounds, because connection is the opposite of addiction, I think is how the saying goes.
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And I wanted to be able to talk the talk while I'm walking the walk with Big Book and 12 and 12 and all the other good pieces of literature.
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And this has proved to be an amazing meeting for that um for that effort.
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I didn't want to feel different, I didn't want to feel separated because, in my opinion, feeling different or separated from the overall group, feeling othered out.
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Not because they're othering me, but because I'm othering myself.
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Like, oh, they're they're different.
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I don't need to associate myself.
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I I'm special.
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My addiction will latch on to that feeling of feeling special, and all of a sudden I'm gonna feel real feel real drunk because I'll be drinking because I'm so special I don't need to do what they're doing.
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Um so it was very important to me to be able to understand the intention of the book, even though there's a lot of archaic and outdated language.
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You know, obviously there's some common s common problems in the big book, like we agnostics, to wives, to the fa I think to the I forget the exact name of the chapter, but to the family, the family afterward, I think.
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Um to employers is another good one.
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Even even some parts of there is a solution, really ruddy the wrong way.
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And it's great to have a meeting that I can come to, read it together, voice, like let that pressure out, be like, this this part pisses me off, but this is pretty good, you know.
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We agnostics, this part pisses me off, but the bedevilness is fantastic.
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I love that part of the big book.
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Um, it's just great to find commonality.
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It was also a great opportunity for me in this meeting to have the chance to, when we were doing more presentation style effort, to present more research-oriented um content for individual chapters.
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For example, we were going through the 12 and 12, um I think in two different occasions, and my chapter that I volunteered to do was on step 11, on meditation and prayer.
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You might think, or I had thought at the time, meditation and prayer, well, I know about I know half of the chapter we'll be worrying about, but in fact, it ended up being um it was a great exercise to understand that meditation and prayer uh for step 11.
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There's more to it than just praying to your God and then praying for it to your your your addiction, your problem to be taken from you, to be relieved of you.
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There's a uh there's a mental state that comes involved with obviously with meditation, but also with prayer.
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Um I think there's actually a like a secular way that we can approach prayer without it necessarily taking religious overtone.
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Um in fact, the famous or maybe perhaps infamous prayer, the um the prayer of Saint Francis, I think the S the actual term, um, which isn't actually of Saint Francis, it's actually somebody else's who made it up.
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We are able to diagram that prayer as part of a meeting at the big at the book study group and come and identify where the prayer lines correspond to each of the steps of the 12 steps and also like honesty, openness, and willingness.
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And so we're able to understand like this, these are prayers, however, they're really just talking twelve steps and the honesty, openness, and willingness, but they're being done through this poetry of of a Christian background.
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And so being able to come to this meeting and pull back the veil of this overtone of religiousness really helped me find value and find sobriety in this in these old traditional literatures.
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When honestly, I don't need that this day and age to stay sober.
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I could easily live the next 10, 20, 50 years of my life just doing online secular meetings and being very lucky for that.
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But I think it's very important for me to not feel to not feel special, to not feel like I have to differentiate myself.
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I'd love to maintain that connection with where the where the program came from, where other people are are coming from with their recovery.
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And it's also really important for me to continue to do service in this meeting because as I mentioned before, we have a bunch of newcomers that keep coming to the meeting, brand, fresh new people looking for um alternatives traditional to traditional meetings.
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They're coming in to this call with um, hey, I've got two days sober.
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I've tried a traditional meeting, but it's really not for me.
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And I want to hear what what you guys have to say about secular big book.
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That's wild to me.
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And it's just really amazing to be able to be um there helping host a meeting and helping put on a meeting and contribute to a meeting that I feel I would be looking for if I were getting sober today.
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Um I would be looking for like, okay, I'm motivated to be in recovery.
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I've heard about this big book.
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It's kind of turning me off when I'm getting to these God words.
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Maybe there's more to it.
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Let me go look online.
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Oh, hey, look, there's this meeting.
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And it's just great to be able to come to that meeting and find value and find good sobriety and recovery from the peop from the other people I've gotten to know in this meeting.
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Um trying to make sure I'm on time.
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The the last part I want to mention about why this meeting is important to me is because I come I came to this meeting originally with a motivation to support my sponsee and to support them with getting this meeting off the ground.
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Um, but what it's actually taught me is there's it's good to stretch myself, it's good to change, and it's good to get out of ruts that I don't even realize I'm in.
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And one of the ruts I was in was avoiding traditional literature and avoiding uh taking a more structured academic approach to you know learning about the history, learning about the big book, learning about the 12 steps and 12 traditions and other materials there.
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And it's really helped my recovery just by continuing to grow in that aspect and get those broader perspectives because it's so easy for me to pigeonhole myself and just stay focused to my one home group and my little my little extra dabbling I do elsewhere.
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Um and I think it's helped me and my sobriety to um continue to be a part of this meeting.
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So I wanted to say thank you to the Global Speaker Tour for letting us come today and talk to you all.
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And uh I'll go ahead and hand it back to Stephanie.
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Thank you so much for sharing that with us, Tony.
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Next up, we have uh Robin from Australia who joins us while this takes place for many of us Wednesday evenings.
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Uh for him, it is Thursday morning.
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So, Robin, come on in and share with us.
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Good morning.
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Um
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And it is morning half past two for me.
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So I'm not going to be as bright and erudite as the last speaker.
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Robin Alcoholic.
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So thanks, Margaretha, and everyone for putting this on this morning.
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For me, I come from a very different place to Tony with this.
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So I've been sober for 43 years and have been involved in AA in Australia, which already is, you know, right from the get-go, is very culturally different to American recovery.
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And our history in Australia with the with the with the literature is um when I came in, um no one even opened the book.
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There was no relationship to any information really at all.
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And our our history was that the big book, we were one of the first countries in the world to get the big book.
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And um a guy called Archie McKinnon, who was a psych nurse, started Alcoholics Um Anonymous here, and he wasn't an alcoholic.
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So Alcoholics Anonymous here was was a skid row, mainly illiterate um deal, which meant that it was a it was all story time.
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So the the history of AA here was that it was all about just sharing very, very long drunklogues, drinking lots of tea, and having smoking competitions, and um it called an hour and a half meeting.
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So our so my relationship to the information in the in the steps grew very slowly, and eventually there was a thing called Joe and Charlie that came around in the 80s, and then the big book hit hit us really hard, and um and then I started to become quite fanatical about it after getting through the steps because my experience was that I didn't I didn't have I still had the obsession to drink for the first five to seven years in AA.
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I did not have an easy time.
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I was 22 years old.
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And um so there was this movement into the steps, which um for me, as um a low-bottom drunk that was you know quite a messy person, I became quite a zealot and fanatical about it.
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I even went to Little Rock, Arkansas and hung out with Joe McQueene and did all this stuff.
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And why I'm saying this is because you know, after this long period of time of having this very strong relationship with the book, and also being an atheist, um I had come to understand the processes that are contained within AA text more than a relationship with the language.
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And also being an older person, and my father was a much older person, the language was not obscure to me.
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It was very it was very easy to understand in a lot of ways.
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Um but there were quite a few meanings that were odd.
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Um so after all that period of time, and then you know, of course, no secular in any way, shape, or form until basically five or six years ago in my in my world, not till the pandemic, did any of that open up?
00:26:04.720 --> 00:27:07.680
That um this has all been quite a shock to my secular and and and looking at looking at the literature as as a secular person in a group has been a completely different world for me because um I've come to what would you say, not very flexible understanding of all of this information, and being you know a semi-retired zealot, um, you know, I've found this this meeting extremely difficult and extremely challenging and also very interesting because I'm listening to points of view and and and it's there's a lot of um in-depth analysis, which for me I really enjoy.
00:27:07.839 --> 00:27:14.559
Like I like to think things through, and I like to hear other people thinking and debating things.
00:27:15.279 --> 00:27:34.079
And while we were focused on the book, I was pretty happy with all of that process, and then we went into some other literature, and my poor little brain just went pop because I couldn't I couldn't comprehend all the other things that we were that we were doing.
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:52.319
And I think this is the point of um alcoholics anonymous for me today, which is to introduce me to and expose me to the modern, you know, all the current alcoholics anonymous and how we perceive things.
00:27:52.559 --> 00:27:55.920
We're actually going through on big tent at the moment.
00:27:57.359 --> 00:28:02.319
And I'm finding it um quite nauseating.
00:28:02.480 --> 00:28:26.480
And and and and the reason that I am is because um there's a there's a there's a current of subservience that people say and rationalize there and and trying to get comfortable with this world of of AA as it's been.
00:28:26.640 --> 00:28:44.880
And and you know, that's that's the thing that that we that we look at here is you know, what are we really saying, and how do we see ourselves as people in secular or atheist or in relationship to literature?
00:28:45.039 --> 00:28:55.599
And you know, I don't really have 15 minutes worth of talking to this morning, so I might give people more chance to talk later.
00:28:55.920 --> 00:29:06.319
But I think the whole point of any meeting is to expand my capacity to um to learn, and this meeting really does that.
00:29:06.480 --> 00:29:18.720
And um, so most of the people that you hear um tonight are going to sound um very humble, and they're not going to really tell you how amazing they are, but I will.
00:29:19.039 --> 00:29:32.640
So someone like Tony is incredibly amazing about what how he analyzes, and there's other members of the group who bring so much to, you know, this AI thing.
00:29:32.799 --> 00:29:34.319
Of course, I'm a relic.
00:29:34.400 --> 00:30:05.200
Um, this AI thing is um bring we're not hearing someone talk, we're hearing this AI non-personality thing describing the literature, reading it out to us, and they give that experience is um there's no real for me there, and this is said in a good way, there's no real reaction to that.
00:30:05.359 --> 00:30:11.519
There's just the information being delivered, and it's a really clear way of hearing something.
00:30:12.079 --> 00:30:36.559
There's no overtones of personality in it, and then there's the analysis, and um yes, it's all it's a very it's a very challenging meeting for me in a lot of ways, but also it's um comforting because I hear what I'm thinking said many, many times by other people, and I also hear things that I never thought said by many people.
00:30:36.720 --> 00:30:39.440
I think isn't that the point of the whole exercise?
00:30:39.680 --> 00:30:46.559
That's all I have to offer this morning, but thank you very much for the opportunity to wake up really early and feel like a Muppet.
00:30:48.960 --> 00:30:53.039
Thank you so much for waking up early and sharing with us, Robin.
00:30:53.599 --> 00:30:56.160
Next up, we have Joe S.
00:30:56.480 --> 00:30:57.920
Come on in, Joe.
00:30:58.799 --> 00:30:59.680
Hi, everyone.
00:30:59.839 --> 00:31:04.319
My name is Joe, and I am in recovery from alcohol abuse and addiction.
00:31:04.720 --> 00:31:08.799
I'm very glad to be here and thanks uh everyone for being here.
00:31:08.960 --> 00:31:19.440
Uh seeing this many people here and knowing that you're doing the work today for what's good for you and your sobriety helps me and my sobriety.
00:31:19.759 --> 00:31:21.359
Um, so I want to say thank you.
00:31:21.519 --> 00:31:24.640
I really appreciate each and every one of you.
00:31:24.880 --> 00:31:29.359
Uh today I have three years and one week of sobriety.
00:31:30.240 --> 00:31:37.599
Um, and I'm very proud of myself for doing the hard work um to stay sober, to be sober today, especially.
00:31:37.839 --> 00:31:43.839
Um when I first went to re I have some notes by the way to keep my head going in a direction.
00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:46.160
So if I look down, that's what I'm looking at.
00:31:46.319 --> 00:31:57.200
Um when I first went to rehab and got sober and began going to meetings, I had no idea how I was going to not drink.
00:31:57.519 --> 00:31:59.920
Um, I was a 24-7 drinker.
00:32:00.079 --> 00:32:03.519
If I wasn't passed out or fallen over, I was drinking.
00:32:03.839 --> 00:32:06.799
Um and uh that was very miserable.
00:32:06.880 --> 00:32:08.720
I was very sad and isolated.
00:32:08.880 --> 00:32:10.799
It was a very dark, dark place.
00:32:11.200 --> 00:32:12.400
Uh and I didn't want to be there.
00:32:12.480 --> 00:32:14.559
I didn't want to be in that dark, dark place.
00:32:14.799 --> 00:32:17.200
Um, but I couldn't get out.
00:32:17.279 --> 00:32:18.640
I didn't know how to get out.
00:32:18.880 --> 00:32:21.680
And honestly, I was trying to kill myself.
00:32:21.759 --> 00:32:24.559
I was trying to die just to end all the pain.
00:32:24.720 --> 00:32:28.640
And I was so frustrated because I was still alive.
00:32:28.720 --> 00:32:29.759
It wasn't working.
00:32:30.000 --> 00:32:37.599
Um, and I felt like, you know, I'm shoving alcohol down my throat and going, why isn't this working?
00:32:37.759 --> 00:32:39.119
Why am I still here?
00:32:39.599 --> 00:32:43.039
Um, and it was just a horrible place to be.
00:32:43.359 --> 00:32:50.160
Um I didn't know I was trying to do that until after I got sober and started the worker recovery.
00:32:50.240 --> 00:32:56.799
I didn't have that perspective until after I stopped drinking and began thinking about that.
00:32:57.039 --> 00:33:00.640
But now I realize that that's that's what I was trying to do.
00:33:01.119 --> 00:33:04.799
Um I live in Denver, Colorado, in the United States.
00:33:04.960 --> 00:33:09.519
I'm currently in mine at North Dakota, um, visiting my husband's family.
00:33:09.680 --> 00:33:14.319
And um we have we have two kids, 19 and 15 years old.
00:33:14.480 --> 00:33:51.680
So I'm gonna share a little bit about uh my experience, strength and hope, and also about how the secular book study has really been an important part of my recovery because it has, um, in large part because I'll be able I'm able to look at the words and the stories that have helped others um through I I happen to be an atheist, through my perspective and um and see through the Christian speak of those stories and a lot of the other writings.
00:33:52.400 --> 00:34:04.160
Um acknowledge that Christian perspective and set it aside so that I can see the things that I that might help me, and I'm very um grateful for it.
00:34:04.480 --> 00:34:09.599
Um I grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, a large Catholic family.
00:34:09.760 --> 00:34:11.679
I'm the youngest of 14 kids.
00:34:11.840 --> 00:34:14.239
There's seven girls and seven boys.
00:34:14.559 --> 00:34:16.960
My mother was very Catholic.
00:34:17.360 --> 00:34:27.679
Um and while she didn't work for income, of course, she was very busy with her work at home and her involvement in volunteering with the church.
00:34:27.840 --> 00:34:29.280
My dad was a mechanic.
00:34:29.360 --> 00:34:35.360
He worked night shift at Nabisco, which is a bakery company, um, fixing their machinery.
00:34:35.519 --> 00:34:39.840
Um both my parents were in World War II.
00:34:39.920 --> 00:34:48.159
My dad was an airplane mechanic in the army, and my mom uh worked in a munitions factory as a Rosie the Riveter type.
00:34:48.559 --> 00:34:53.039
If you're familiar with that, um with that.
00:34:53.199 --> 00:35:01.599
Um so I'm 57 years old today, and I didn't I got sober when I was 54.
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:15.280
Yeah, that would have been made me um and uh just to understand, yeah, growing up we're very very working class, we didn't have a lot of money.
00:35:15.840 --> 00:35:21.360
Um and while I always had a roof over my head, it was not a safe roof.
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:31.840
Um I'm very now I'm now very close to some of my siblings, and I am very much not in touch with others.
00:35:32.719 --> 00:35:35.519
Um my siblings.
00:35:35.840 --> 00:35:37.360
My father died when I was seven.
00:35:37.440 --> 00:35:40.800
He had a heart attack on Father's Day, he was in his late 50s.
00:35:41.360 --> 00:35:55.679
Um that experience, along with many other experiences, both when I was a child, teenager, young adult, and as a grown adult, um exposed me to a lot of pain.
00:35:56.159 --> 00:36:07.119
And I was born into and lived in an environment that was not conducive to dealing or understanding or addressing that pain.
00:36:07.280 --> 00:36:21.920
Um my my parents, well, my dad died when I was still very young, but my mom had no um uh she had no idea how to deal with this stuff either.
00:36:22.239 --> 00:36:28.960
Neither of my parents grew up in a uh supportive or helpful situation either.
00:36:29.199 --> 00:36:32.000
Um my mom passed about 20 years ago.
00:36:32.800 --> 00:36:38.639
Um and uh yeah, it wasn't a it wasn't a pleasant growing up.
00:36:38.800 --> 00:36:46.960
Um but alcohol I discovered stopped the pain, or so I thought.
00:36:47.280 --> 00:36:58.239
And um so eventually I was doing nothing but drink, which paradoxically, of course, caused more pain than ever before.
00:36:58.719 --> 00:37:03.519
Um I didn't start drinking until uh I I my mother never drank.
00:37:03.599 --> 00:37:09.360
Um, I knew my dad drank, and I knew that he had alcoholism in his family.
00:37:09.679 --> 00:37:16.559
Um it was a pretty brutal upbringing for him and for my mom as well.
00:37:16.960 --> 00:37:23.519
Um, but while drink while alcohol was involved in my dad's family, it wasn't really in my mom's.
00:37:23.840 --> 00:37:28.800
So um I didn't grow up drinking, I didn't grow up, we didn't have alcohol in the house.
00:37:28.960 --> 00:37:31.360
I just didn't have that exposure at all.
00:37:31.760 --> 00:37:42.159
Um, but in my 20s, I started drinking and didn't drink very much or very often until really my late 30s.
00:37:42.719 --> 00:37:45.280
And uh then it really took a turn.
00:37:45.360 --> 00:37:49.840
Um, where in my 20s I could leave a drink unfinished.
00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:52.000
Uh at some point I couldn't.
00:37:52.159 --> 00:37:54.400
Um, and that was in my late 30s.
00:37:54.480 --> 00:37:59.039
And I mentioned that because, you know, some people start drinking at different times in their lives.
00:37:59.119 --> 00:38:05.039
I mentioned that for me because that's how I came around to my where I am.
00:38:05.679 --> 00:38:22.880
Um, and it really slowed my brain being able to understand that I was an alcoholic and I did have a problem because I kept thinking back to those those years where I would, where it wasn't a problem, where I was drinking and it wasn't a problem until it was.
00:38:23.039 --> 00:38:26.480
Um, so I kept thinking, well, I stopped before, I can stop now.
00:38:26.559 --> 00:38:30.719
I should be able to stop now, I should be able to manage it, it shouldn't be a problem, et cetera, et cetera.
00:38:30.880 --> 00:38:35.440
But um it was, but it took me a while to to ask for help.
00:38:35.599 --> 00:38:41.119
Um, I kept trying to stop on my own, and that that didn't happen.
00:38:41.360 --> 00:38:50.960
Um one when I the the time in my life where I did ask for help because I needed it, um, as many of us do.
00:38:51.280 --> 00:38:53.920
Um one night I was laying in my bed.
00:38:54.000 --> 00:38:55.679
I was very alone, very sick.
00:38:55.840 --> 00:39:02.320
It was very I remember it was physically dark, not just mentally and emotionally dark, but physically dark.
00:39:03.840 --> 00:39:09.599
And the thought came to me, and I might cry, and if I cry, I know that's okay.
00:39:09.760 --> 00:39:10.960
It's okay to cry.
00:39:11.199 --> 00:39:13.360
Um I'm not gonna apologize for crying.
00:39:13.519 --> 00:39:21.760
And but the thought came to me as it the thought had often occurred came to me before that my children would be better off if I were dead.
00:39:22.159 --> 00:39:36.320
What was different in that moment that time it was true that moment that time it was true that they would be better off.
00:39:39.760 --> 00:39:46.159
And then I thought that that can't be true.
00:39:46.320 --> 00:39:50.480
I I love my kids, I care for them, I want to be part of their lives.
00:39:53.119 --> 00:39:57.199
That moment thinking that I I thought that's that's fucked up.
00:39:58.960 --> 00:40:03.679
And then in that next moment, it wasn't true anymore.
00:40:03.840 --> 00:40:07.119
It wasn't true anymore that they would be better off if I were dead.
00:40:07.360 --> 00:40:10.159
And that's when I asked for help and I received help.
00:40:10.239 --> 00:40:19.119
I wanted to read detox and rehab and got sober, and I'm very grateful that I am sober today.
00:40:19.840 --> 00:40:40.559
Um when I first did get sober and started going to meetings, the only exposure I had to people getting sober and and addiction recovery and AA was what I had read about or seen in TV shows or movies, and that was all fiction, of course.
00:40:40.800 --> 00:40:45.519
And I, but I that's all I knew, and I thought, well, I'm not gonna go to meetings, meetings are ridiculous.
00:40:45.679 --> 00:40:55.039
It's you know old white Christian men and folding chairs at the bottom of a church.
00:40:55.199 --> 00:41:05.039
At this time, I was, you know, I was already an atheist thinking I I am gonna have nothing in common with these people and that they're not gonna want me there, and I'm not gonna want to be there.
00:41:05.280 --> 00:41:09.039
Um, I now know that that's not what meetings are.
00:41:09.760 --> 00:41:15.119
That's certainly not my experience with meetings because meetings are a huge part of my my recovery.
00:41:15.360 --> 00:41:24.480
Um and early on in meetings, I remember hearing people talk about long-term, their long-term sobriety years and years.
00:41:24.559 --> 00:41:26.800
And I remember thinking, what are you doing here?
00:41:26.960 --> 00:41:30.159
I was thinking, okay, I'll go to meetings for a year and then I'll be done.
00:41:30.480 --> 00:41:34.480
And um, I now know for me that is not the truth.
00:41:34.719 --> 00:41:42.800
And I am glad that I now listen to myself and trust myself to know that that's not the truth for me right now.
00:41:42.960 --> 00:42:04.719
And I really appreciate meetings, and I specifically appreciate the secular book study meetings because I read the big book and I read a lot of more traditional Christian focused um AA writings.
00:42:05.760 --> 00:42:11.920
And I know I see that they're sober people and they rely on those writings.
00:42:12.000 --> 00:42:21.039
So I know there's something there that works, and different parts of those writings and the community and the fellowship, different parts of them work for different people.
00:42:21.280 --> 00:42:26.960
For some of them, it's the Christian element, but I know I know it's that's not for me.
00:42:27.119 --> 00:42:29.199
That part of it isn't for me.
00:42:29.440 --> 00:42:35.599
And I get really frustrated with any assumptions that it has to, my sobriety has to be a certain way.
00:42:35.920 --> 00:42:38.159
Um, I'm a slightly stubborn.
00:42:38.320 --> 00:42:38.960
That was a joke.
00:42:39.039 --> 00:42:40.960
I'm very stubborn uh person.
00:42:41.119 --> 00:42:52.719
So and I and I I know that if somebody says you have to do this one thing to stay sober, and it doesn't feel right in my gut that that's the thing I need to do, I'm not gonna do it.
00:42:52.880 --> 00:42:54.480
Um, and I know that about me.
00:42:54.639 --> 00:43:35.840
So what I really appreciate about the secular book study is to be able to be an environment where I can share, where I feel I can I can share openly and to help me and also listen to other people and how things help them to look at those writings from a set from their perspective and from my secular perspective and kind of weave through and and acknowledge the environment they were written in, but for me to weave through that and then see more clearly the elements of those writings that will help me, that have helped me, that do help me.
00:43:36.239 --> 00:43:40.480
Um, so I am very grateful for that, uh, for that group.
00:43:40.639 --> 00:43:42.480
Um, and it's been very interesting.
00:43:42.559 --> 00:43:57.840
It's been very helpful to me for the big book study to actually that that one book to study that in it from a secular perspective, because I had no clue to it otherwise, and also to look at other um other writings from a secular perspective as well.
00:43:58.079 --> 00:43:59.760
So that's my experience strength.
00:44:00.320 --> 00:44:06.000
And hope, thank you so much for giving me the space to share that and for inviting me for this.
00:44:06.239 --> 00:44:08.000
I think this is a great group, too.
00:44:08.239 --> 00:44:15.360
I uh love coming to this um monthly once-a-month meeting too, whenever I can.
00:44:15.519 --> 00:44:17.280
So thank you again for the space to share.
00:44:17.360 --> 00:44:18.800
And with that, I will pass.
00:44:22.800 --> 00:44:25.760
Thank you so much sharing with us today, Joe.
00:44:25.920 --> 00:44:29.360
And last but not least, we have the ever-grateful Jeb.
00:44:29.519 --> 00:44:30.639
Come on in, Jeb.
00:44:31.280 --> 00:44:35.360
Yes, my name is Jeb, Grateful Recovered Addict Alcoholic.
00:44:35.519 --> 00:44:54.320
And I want to express my gratitude uh again today to uh all of the people that make these weekly, these monthly meetings possible to get the message spread further and further that that you don't have to be religious in order to find recovery in in AA.
00:44:54.559 --> 00:45:05.920
And I reminded you of a group that that I attend regularly and meetings that that says that anonymity is so important that anonymity is half of their name.
00:45:06.079 --> 00:45:11.840
Well, that means they are not alcoholics anonymous, they are alcoholics and not anonymity.
00:45:12.159 --> 00:45:14.719
And uh, I just have to state that.
00:45:15.119 --> 00:45:23.599
But um, yeah, this uh I love what we've shared here, and I love the way this meeting uh has evolved.
00:45:23.679 --> 00:45:28.000
You know, I don't think it was ever registered and became a registered group or whatever.
00:45:28.159 --> 00:45:32.960
It's essentially a meeting that has had good support over the years and it's evolved.
00:45:33.119 --> 00:45:44.639
We started with doing what is so-called conference approved literature without any understanding of what AA has written about what conference approved literature.
00:45:44.800 --> 00:46:08.000
There is a wonderful bulletin um of uh in the in the guidelines, in the a guidelines on conference approved literature, which makes it very clear that um uh that phrase does not mean that AA as such does not approve of other literature.
00:46:08.159 --> 00:46:31.760
In fact, if you do a Google search on AA conference approved literature, you'll find a lot of things that that means a group, because a group economy can use the Bible, the Torah, uh, you know, or any or other literature, and it can use prayer or not use prayer, but that's up to the group, or guess we'd say it's the meeting.
00:46:32.000 --> 00:47:01.519
So, you know, the I often say that point out that you know it what was it at the 75th anniversary of the publication of what we call the big book now, there they published a facsimile of the big book, which was published not by AA World Services, but by what was it called Works Publishing Company, which eventually became AA World Services.
00:47:01.679 --> 00:47:24.400
So I still say think that AA, for all it is worth, is still primarily a publishing company, and that's where we started with this meeting with um the secular book Sandy meeting, and we started with the big book and with this reading uh from it and discussing it from a secular and and honest perspective.
00:47:24.559 --> 00:47:28.079
Then we did the 12 and 12, and then we did.
00:47:28.320 --> 00:47:51.360
I think we went on to the uh we jumped to uh Dale K's book, Secular Sobriety, which is a a rewrite of the first 64 pages, taking out some of the the magical thinking, and that was satisfying, and then you did oh man, the plain plain language version of the big book.
00:47:51.599 --> 00:48:00.400
Oh, and that's what put all of that magical thinking and writing into modern language, which really drove people away.
00:48:00.639 --> 00:48:18.079
So I think we learned from that, and then we went on to looking beyond uh the the literature that is so-called conference approved, where the copyright is maybe owned by Alcoholics Anonymous or AA World Services.
00:48:18.480 --> 00:48:32.559
And uh we had a great experience in in reading and discussing uh Nathan's book from the uh uh the Reason in Recovery, the six-step program.
00:48:33.039 --> 00:48:38.559
And that you know, that brought really good recovery sharing out, and I love that.
00:48:38.719 --> 00:48:48.159
And we also did uh Bill W, Bill Wolf's uh book on on the 12 steps, and uh that that was good.
00:48:48.559 --> 00:49:02.320
And you know, we're taking advantage of what the the the guidelines say that if it doesn't say conference approved, it doesn't mean that it is not not approved.
00:49:02.559 --> 00:49:13.760
In fact, if you do a Google search on that sort of thing, you'll find places that means a group, because of its autonomy, can use the Bible or something else, and prayers are not prayers and so forth.
00:49:13.920 --> 00:49:17.360
So group groups are distinctive in themselves.
00:49:17.599 --> 00:49:24.960
But this one has become this meeting, has become the most consistent recovery-oriented meeting in my in my week.
00:49:25.039 --> 00:49:29.360
And I still go to a meeting uh every day, sometimes two meetings.
00:49:29.519 --> 00:49:47.119
I think yesterday I went to three meetings, because I need to hear what other people are thinking, what they're doing, what their experience is, and what they're getting out of this this process of of 12-step or six-step recovery or whatever it is, or out of just being a part of the fellowship.
00:49:47.360 --> 00:49:54.320
Um, I uh um I never tire of AA.
00:49:54.719 --> 00:50:00.159
I get tired of of not hearing enough about the solution.
00:50:00.400 --> 00:50:15.920
And when I came into AA, I call it conventional AA, and the sort of thing that I was in for 37 years before secular meetings started growing and people started getting a little bit more honest about themselves.
00:50:16.320 --> 00:50:27.280
Um during that time, I had to do a lot of translation of what people were saying and what the book said in order to under accommodate it.
00:50:27.440 --> 00:50:40.480
And you know, when I read the big book today, I can always add a word, an O to the word God, and so it becomes good, or thinking of it as goodness, and it's not being a person or a being and so forth.
00:50:40.800 --> 00:50:53.119
But uh I I've never thought that AA was a Judeo-Christian movement at all, because the big book actually doesn't reflect that in my experience.
00:50:53.280 --> 00:50:58.079
That that that's what it is for some people, but not for not for me.
00:50:58.320 --> 00:51:08.079
And you know, I've always tried to do what I heard at my first lesson, uh my first meeting, and that was that we do do this one day at a time.
00:51:08.239 --> 00:51:17.760
And so I I've always been a day counter, and today is day 17,508 since my last drink and night of alcohol, and that's a good deal.
00:51:17.840 --> 00:51:28.159
But I have a friend here who has 50 some years, she has 20,000 plus years of of sobriety and recovery, and and and guess what?
00:51:28.320 --> 00:51:30.159
She still goes to meetings.
00:51:30.400 --> 00:51:30.880
Why?
00:51:31.119 --> 00:51:43.119
Because the fellowship is what really makes this work, and I found a kind of fellowship in the secular book study meeting, which taking book big book out of it because we're doing a lot more than the big book.
00:51:43.280 --> 00:51:59.519
Yeah, yeah, I found more recovery in that meeting and wonderful discussions about the things we're reading, and now we're reading from the Grapevine publication, um, One Big Ten, which it's incidentally is not conference approved.
00:51:59.760 --> 00:52:08.960
And I want to say also the guidelines that I was quoting from are not conference approved, but but they're published and put out there by Alcoholics Anonymous.
00:52:09.199 --> 00:52:15.199
So I find that some of this stuff is a little bit confusing and also humorous.
00:52:15.519 --> 00:52:32.400
So um I I look forward to whatever we're going to do next because there seems to be more and more insight into what the problem was and what the process is than um than we thought there was at the beginning.
00:52:32.639 --> 00:52:40.239
And so, you know, essentially what we have is a secular book study meeting.
00:52:40.400 --> 00:52:48.480
And that means we can probably go in any direction to discuss and read any anything that relates to to the recovery.
00:52:48.800 --> 00:52:51.360
And um I appreciate that.
00:52:51.519 --> 00:53:07.360
And I appreciate those who started it and kept things going and the incredible work that our friend Tony does in making the readings and the visuals available for the meeting so that we don't have to get a book out for ourselves.
00:53:07.519 --> 00:53:12.239
We can just see everything up posted on the screen and listen to things.
00:53:12.400 --> 00:53:16.239
And and that that makes it just amazing, an amazing experience.
00:53:16.639 --> 00:53:30.079
Um, I'm I'm I'm so grateful to people like Robin from from down under tune in from the future from the next day, so we can also hear that long-term sobriety perspective.
00:53:30.320 --> 00:53:44.880
And uh, you know, I'm I love this meeting, and I I love what we're doing here with the secular the global speaker tour, because we're getting a sampling of how d diverse Alcoholics Anonymous is.
00:53:45.119 --> 00:53:59.360
And that's the main reason I put the rainbow frame around my screen today, because there is such diversity of opinion, experience, and hope here that uh we get to share with one another.
00:53:59.840 --> 00:54:16.800
So I can't think of anything else real important for me to say except that I am I'll be eternally grateful to the people who started all of this, keep things going, keep offering more that what may hope may hopefully help more and more people around the world.
00:54:17.519 --> 00:54:18.800
Thank you so much.
00:54:23.920 --> 00:54:25.679
Oh I'm just gonna thank him.
00:54:26.719 --> 00:54:29.920
Oh um, you go ahead and then I'll okay.
00:54:30.480 --> 00:54:43.599
All right, um, Margarita here, and I just I wanted to thank the group so much and um uh gonna do a quick um uh uh commercial here about the the seventh tradition.
00:54:43.920 --> 00:54:44.559
Welcome.
00:54:44.719 --> 00:54:49.760
Um as per AA Seventh Tradition, we are self-supporting through own contributions.
00:54:49.920 --> 00:55:01.599
Meetings are free to any who need them, but we do have expenses and appreciate your uh support um for our uh Zoom expenses, postings, and uh the recordings.
00:55:01.679 --> 00:55:11.280
And uh, if you'd like to contribute, you can please visit our website using the link that uh we have also added to the chat or these QR codes here.
00:55:11.679 --> 00:55:24.320
Another um announcement that I I think I skipped over before was about on the second day of the in-person conference, there will be an in-memorium session session.
00:55:24.559 --> 00:55:54.480
So there is a request to please submit photos and names or initial and initial the last name of the any deceased member to Bridget M, um the chair of secular AA, and her their address is in the email addresses in the um in the chat, and um they're hoping to uh collect that by October 15th to um organize a presentation for the Saturday, the 14th of October.
00:55:54.719 --> 00:55:57.920
Um Stephanie Yet is going to moderate.
00:55:58.079 --> 00:56:06.719
Let me just say before um that the meeting is now open for discussion, please raise your virtual hand using the reactions button at the bottom of your screen.
00:56:06.880 --> 00:56:11.599
Please take your chair to three to four minutes so that all who wish to share may.
00:56:11.920 --> 00:56:18.320
Our expectation is that we're here to support each other, and we do encourage you to identify with what has been shared previously.
00:56:18.559 --> 00:56:20.719
The meeting usually lasts about 90 minutes.
00:56:21.119 --> 00:56:26.880
Folks are welcome to stick around after the formal part of the meeting to socialize.
00:56:27.039 --> 00:56:37.599
Um, participants can share in English or Spanish because you will be translated into the other language simultaneously by Verónica or Fabio.
00:56:37.760 --> 00:56:47.440
And to choose to listen in English only or Spanish only, find the globe icon labeled interpretation on your toolbar and select your preferred language.
00:56:47.599 --> 00:56:55.280
And bilingual people, you can stay on the default original setting if you on it uh uh if you want to hear both.
00:56:55.440 --> 00:57:00.159
So um I will pass the uh mic back to Stephanie.
00:57:00.320 --> 00:57:06.960
And thank you so much, secular book study group today for your for your service and your your sharing.
00:57:09.679 --> 00:57:11.679
Thank you so much, Margarita.
00:57:12.000 --> 00:57:22.239
Uh before we move on to sharing, um I did want to send a special thank you to the two groups that make the secular book study possible.
00:57:22.559 --> 00:57:31.119
And that is the folks from our mostly agnostic group of drunks, also known as Omegaud, as well as Reason and Recovery.
00:57:31.280 --> 00:57:34.239
So with that, uh Karen, come on in.
00:57:34.320 --> 00:57:35.519
Oops, sorry, Karen.
00:57:37.519 --> 00:57:39.280
I'm Karen and I'm an alcoholic.
00:57:39.360 --> 00:57:40.480
This is a wonderful meeting.
00:57:40.639 --> 00:57:42.079
I love book groups.
00:57:42.559 --> 00:57:47.280
Um I live in Pinellas County, which is part of the Tampa Bay area.
00:57:47.519 --> 00:57:58.880
And I had the very good fortune to find a group that um for my home group that was very tolerant of whether you were agnostic or atheist or religious.
00:57:59.039 --> 00:58:06.639
But um we have a a little local book group like yours that we call happy hour.
00:58:06.719 --> 00:58:10.559
We like it so much because it meets at five o'clock in the afternoon.
00:58:10.639 --> 00:58:18.079
And we've read everything from Quitlet to Um Al Anon to History of AA.
00:58:18.239 --> 00:58:31.039
And um I recommend anybody to start your own little group, you know, because it is it is we just have warm, fuzzy feelings about AA, and when we meet in that group, it's really special.
00:58:31.360 --> 00:58:37.119
And the other thing that I would I will put um aapinellus.org in the chat.
00:58:37.280 --> 00:58:44.239
If you're in the Tampa Bay area, we have in Dunedin, we have two free thinker groups.
00:58:44.480 --> 00:58:56.159
One is on in person, one is on Wednesday evenings, and the other one is on Saturday after late afternoon, one is an open discussion, and one is an agnostic step meeting.
00:58:56.480 --> 00:59:01.119
So if you're in the area, I welcome you to join either of those meetings.
00:59:01.199 --> 00:59:02.639
They're also in the meeting guide.
00:59:02.719 --> 00:59:05.119
And thanks for having this wonderful meeting.
00:59:05.199 --> 00:59:10.639
And Jeb, thanks for talking more about conference-approved literature.
00:59:11.599 --> 00:59:17.119
People get get their knickers in a twist about that, and it's too bad that they do.
00:59:17.360 --> 00:59:19.280
Thanks everybody for all of this.
00:59:22.079 --> 00:59:24.639
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Karen.
00:59:25.199 --> 00:59:27.519
Margarita, do you want to come in and share?
00:59:27.920 --> 00:59:28.639
Yeah, I will.
00:59:28.800 --> 00:59:34.239
Well, it's uh I usually let others share first, but I thought I'd jump in since nobody's hands were up.
00:59:34.320 --> 00:59:36.639
I'm Margarita, alcohol free.
00:59:36.880 --> 00:59:48.159
Um I um have always loved how Jeb counts his days, and I am celebrating 1869 days of waking up glad I didn't have a drink the day before.
00:59:48.480 --> 00:59:52.559
And uh I am uh and an ever-grateful Margarita.
00:59:52.960 --> 01:00:07.840
I um I'm so glad that I get to stay coming to meetings even after having a year of sobriety, because this community means the the world to me.
01:00:08.000 --> 01:00:14.800
Um, a lot of people uh who know me know that our family has gone through a rough couple of weeks lately.
01:00:14.960 --> 01:00:20.239
We uh we just had a great, you know, move successful into our new home.
01:00:20.400 --> 01:00:28.639
And um, and then we got news that our dog that we were going to bring to live with us passed away unexpectedly, 11-year-old, and that broke our hearts.
01:00:28.880 --> 01:00:32.639
And then four days later, my uh father-in-law passed away.
01:00:32.800 --> 01:00:52.239
So um I have I I feel sad, but also so fortunate because I have um so much loving support thanks to this community and such great um you know examples.
01:00:52.559 --> 01:00:55.760
I I'm no longer afraid of my emotions.
01:00:55.920 --> 01:00:57.599
I know they're not gonna last forever.
01:00:57.760 --> 01:00:58.639
I know they're okay.
01:00:58.800 --> 01:01:04.400
I've learned I can do hard emotions, and it's thanks to uh to this community.
01:01:04.639 --> 01:01:13.599
Um and yeah, it's it's it's hard, but it's also just so much reasons, many reasons I have I have gratitude.
01:01:13.920 --> 01:01:20.800
Um, just thinking about all the people who who are here today and who make this happen.
01:01:20.960 --> 01:01:45.920
This is such a a fantastic community of um, you know, international, like just from the difference of being so isolated and alone in hot and you know in the depths of my active addiction compared to this, where I have people I can reach out to all over the world now and uh you know who are it's not superficial anymore, you know, it's it's loving.
01:01:46.159 --> 01:01:56.000
And uh I'm um so yeah, I'm glad that uh you don't just need to go to a meeting for one year and then and then you're you're done.
01:01:56.320 --> 01:02:02.320
Um but uh I just I just had to give a shout out to also to Tony.
01:02:02.400 --> 01:02:05.440
I love how he called it the poetry of a Christian background.
01:02:05.519 --> 01:02:10.320
So now it's gonna I'm gonna start calling it the poetry of Christian mythology.
01:02:10.559 --> 01:02:22.639
And uh and and calling it poetry makes me softer, makes me less resentful of um, you know, all the the the the um I don't feel like I'm being pros.
01:02:23.119 --> 01:02:27.360
I won't, I'm hoping when I read these things I won't feel like I'm being proselytized too.
01:02:27.519 --> 01:02:34.320
You know, I'm I'm being, you know, this is they're taking poetic uh license, that's what they're doing.
01:02:34.559 --> 01:02:43.440
But um yeah, so I just yeah, thanks everybody for being here and thanks for for for the folks who shared today.
01:02:46.400 --> 01:02:48.239
Thank you so much, Margarita.
01:02:48.320 --> 01:02:49.679
I appreciate you.
01:02:50.239 --> 01:02:53.360
Next up, we have Mary C.
01:02:53.760 --> 01:02:54.320
Come on in.
01:02:54.960 --> 01:02:57.920
Yes, my name's Mary, and I'm an alcoholic.
01:02:58.079 --> 01:03:00.079
I I'm Mary's Joe.
01:03:00.719 --> 01:03:02.880
And uh um thanks.
01:03:03.039 --> 01:03:08.320
Uh this meeting, we never knew how long it would last, but it means the world to me.
01:03:08.480 --> 01:03:14.000
This is a great way to spend uh one Sunday a month, and it's an open meeting.
01:03:14.159 --> 01:03:18.079
So invite anybody here who's curious about AA.
01:03:18.639 --> 01:03:24.719
And um uh this was a uh a fascinating meeting.
01:03:24.800 --> 01:03:26.239
I I learned lots.
01:03:26.320 --> 01:03:37.440
Uh Joe, I don't know you as well as these other three guys, these guys are my guys, and um I really appreciate uh what I heard.
01:03:37.679 --> 01:03:52.400
Um, you know, it it's uh I came in like Robin did, uh young punk, and um I I had no real what what was the point in AA history, right?
01:03:52.559 --> 01:03:54.159
It was about the future of AA.
01:03:54.320 --> 01:03:56.880
What can we do to alter or improve, right?
01:03:57.039 --> 01:04:00.239
Forget about what grandpa did, right?
01:04:00.400 --> 01:04:02.239
Let's let's move forward.
01:04:02.480 --> 01:04:20.320
And uh like it wasn't until uh my group was being threatened to be kicked out of AA that I thought, I think I need to know a little about the history here because I'm talking about what AA is and what it isn't, and it's different than from what the other person is saying, what AA is and what A isn't.
01:04:20.480 --> 01:04:30.960
So I out of necessity developed uh uh a need to be as engaged with AA history as AA's future.
01:04:31.199 --> 01:04:34.239
Now I treat today as AA's history, right?
01:04:34.320 --> 01:04:35.679
This is history in the making.
01:04:35.840 --> 01:04:45.360
This meeting was history in the making, and uh we should record these as we're doing or write it down because it's gonna be important to somebody.
01:04:45.599 --> 01:04:51.840
But um thanks everybody for sharing, for helping me uh keep more of an open mind.
01:04:52.239 --> 01:05:09.760
And uh uh like uh I hope this meeting uh lasts forever because uh I think it it does a lot uh for AA as a whole, as well as uh those of us of the uh irreligious persuasion.
01:05:10.159 --> 01:05:10.800
Mary.
01:06:02.159 --> 01:06:05.519
Kenji in San Francisco, come on in.
01:06:05.920 --> 01:06:07.280
Hey everybody, Kenji.
01:06:07.440 --> 01:06:09.840
I think I'll call it human in recovery.
01:06:10.079 --> 01:06:11.840
And hey, I want to hear Mary.
01:06:12.159 --> 01:06:18.719
Mary, raise your hand again and just pass over both air buds to her, and we'll be able to hear her perfectly well.
01:06:18.960 --> 01:06:21.840
Or go on speakerphone, whatever.
01:06:22.320 --> 01:06:23.920
That's what the problem was.
01:06:26.000 --> 01:06:27.360
Wow, this meeting today.
01:06:27.519 --> 01:06:36.159
So this group, you know, I attended the first couple of meetings of this group and um the secular book study.
01:06:36.639 --> 01:06:44.960
And Stephanie was very ambitious, wanted to make it, you know, had all these great ideas for how she wanted to do it.
01:06:45.360 --> 01:06:48.000
And I had a more basic.
01:06:48.320 --> 01:06:54.079
Anyway, I had ideas about what a secular book study should be like, and it wasn't it was being done differently than that.
01:06:54.159 --> 01:07:07.440
And I guess I was being um um in a bleeding deacon and um and didn't stick around, but I'm really impressed that the meeting has lasted this long.
01:07:07.599 --> 01:07:08.400
When did it start?
01:07:08.480 --> 01:07:09.280
A couple of years ago?
01:07:09.440 --> 01:07:11.840
Was it two years ago or longer?
01:07:12.159 --> 01:07:16.159
Um, but um I've really enjoyed all the chairs four.
01:07:16.320 --> 01:07:16.719
Wow.
01:07:16.800 --> 01:07:22.079
So that so yeah, I was and it's that meant I was pretty new back then too.
01:07:22.239 --> 01:07:28.000
Um, and maybe a little, maybe my edges have sanded off a bit since then.
01:07:28.320 --> 01:07:44.960
Um, but I've really enjoyed all the chairs today a lot, and um I was thrilled to hear Tony chair, because I I know you, Tony, from you know, working with you and stuff like Zoom stuff.
01:07:45.119 --> 01:07:51.039
And um, but um I I don't think I've ever heard this.
01:07:51.199 --> 01:07:53.840
Yeah, I've never really heard you before.
01:07:53.920 --> 01:07:54.719
That was amazing.
01:07:54.880 --> 01:08:04.239
And the word from your chair, Tony, you know, really jumped out at me, which is a word that I don't think I've ever heard in an AA meeting, is you said you mentioned subservience.
01:08:04.400 --> 01:08:09.039
And I thought, wow, what an interesting way I wrote it down so I didn't forget it.
01:08:09.280 --> 01:08:25.520
Um, because so much of you know, traditional AA kind of has a that kind of a vibe, you know, do what your sponsor tells you, um, you know, bow down before, you know, the Lord in the third step.
01:08:25.840 --> 01:08:32.319
Um and um it definitely doesn't have to be that way.
01:08:32.479 --> 01:08:38.079
I mean, to me, the third step is just making the decision to deal myself in and go on with the work.
01:08:38.239 --> 01:08:44.720
And and it doesn't have to have anything to do with got believing in God at all.
01:08:44.880 --> 01:08:52.159
It's just the operative part of the big book even says it the this decision, you know, it talks about it's a decision.
01:08:52.479 --> 01:09:03.119
Um anyway, yeah, I've I've enjoyed all the chairs today, and um, and I love this group too.
01:09:03.279 --> 01:09:18.960
And I love that secular AA, we're we're laying down a record of ourselves um by, I mean, so many groups like this group, you know, records the meetings and posts them.
01:09:19.119 --> 01:09:31.119
Um, Tasnua records their speakers, and we're a small enough fellowship that sooner or later we all get asked to speak, to tell our story at a meet at a meeting where it gets recorded.
01:09:31.359 --> 01:09:37.359
And um, yeah, it's incredible how we're leaving, how we're recording a record of ourselves.
01:09:37.680 --> 01:09:40.960
Um, I don't know if anybody's actually listening to those recordings.
01:09:41.119 --> 01:09:47.119
No, I hear that people are listening, that there's actually a lot of downloads or or listens.
01:09:47.279 --> 01:09:50.880
Anyway, um thanks so much.
01:09:51.119 --> 01:09:55.680
And maybe we'll have to drop back to your group and actually check it out for myself.
01:09:55.840 --> 01:09:56.640
Thanks a lot.
01:09:57.359 --> 01:09:59.119
Oh, and uh oh, I'm thrilled.
01:09:59.199 --> 01:10:01.600
Mary is gonna be gonna hear Mary next.
01:10:01.760 --> 01:10:06.079
Also, thank you so much, Kanji.
01:10:07.119 --> 01:10:10.479
Next up, Mary's gonna come in and share with us now.
01:10:17.840 --> 01:10:19.119
Okay, thank y'all.
01:10:19.600 --> 01:10:27.439
Uh, what I was trying to say was I'm so impressed by your presentation today and how professional you are.
01:10:27.520 --> 01:10:31.359
And it looks like a secular AA TV channel, and I love that.
01:10:31.920 --> 01:10:33.520
I love that so much.
01:10:33.760 --> 01:10:38.239
And um, I'm looking forward to coming to your group now.
01:10:38.399 --> 01:10:45.840
Like I didn't even know when it was, but the funny thing was, I went to my in-person Sunday meeting today, and there was a guy there that I haven't seen in a long time.
01:10:46.000 --> 01:10:49.359
And I said, Sean, you know, what meetings are you going to online?
01:10:49.600 --> 01:10:55.840
And he said, Oh, well, I was going to the secular study group, and now they're reading uh from One Big Ten.
01:10:56.079 --> 01:10:58.319
And I was like, gosh, I hope he's here today.
01:10:58.399 --> 01:11:05.760
And I hope he knew that y'all were on board because uh he's sober and uh so you're doing good work.
01:11:05.840 --> 01:11:15.840
And I loved hearing all of your stories and your shares, so beautifully said and perfectly honest, and I'm just amazed.
01:11:16.000 --> 01:11:17.680
And so thank you for telling me when it is.
01:11:17.760 --> 01:11:18.880
I'm gonna come.
01:11:22.079 --> 01:11:25.600
Thank you for jumping back in and sharing with us, Mary.
01:11:25.760 --> 01:11:27.920
Next up we have Claudia S.
01:11:31.680 --> 01:11:34.159
Muchísimas gracias, Estefanía.
01:11:34.560 --> 01:11:37.840
Soy Claudia, soy alcohólica y el día de hoy me he bebido.
01:11:38.399 --> 01:12:04.319
Bueno, me hace muy feliz estar en la reunión donde comparte este grupo in particular, porque me ayudó a familiarizarme con la idea que ya había leído en el sitio web de Agnóstica, en la que el tema de la literatura aprobada era algo así como la Santa Inquisición, prohibiendo libros, y que no tenía sentido.
01:12:04.880 --> 01:12:18.159
But a veces estamos tan, en mi caso personal, tan adiestrados, tan dogmatizados, que nos parece implícitamente que si hacemos alguna cambio, pues estamos mal.
01:12:35.600 --> 01:13:38.800
Entré a su sitio web and vi la introducción de este taller, de este studio, and me encantó leer que decía que vamos a leer a los cofundadores, a los fundadores, a los primeros miembros, tratar de transmitir un mensaje con las herramientas que tenían in ese tiempo, con la situación, el contexto que vivían en ese momento, tratando de empatizar, and me hizo darme cuenta que la literatura original ya podía dejar de ser mi enemigo, because I sent you in occasions, ya que hay un acoso silencioso a través de la literatura no religiosa, and in my case, y me abrió un mundo en realidad, because a particular deal hizo possible that all the textbooks that compared in our group, Jim Burwell, los secularicemos.
01:13:39.920 --> 01:14:04.239
No dejamos que se pase el tema oficial, de los poderes sobrenaturales, porque queremos aprovechar allá transmitir la literatura original sin dar este personagens who are acos in their proper groups with the religiosity.
01:15:13.520 --> 01:15:16.640
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Claudia.
01:15:17.199 --> 01:15:19.520
And next, the ever grateful Jeb.
01:15:19.680 --> 01:15:20.479
Come on in.
01:15:25.279 --> 01:15:26.399
Well, thanks, Seven.
01:15:27.199 --> 01:15:38.720
Um yeah, I forgot to share something important to me is there's so much non uh non-AA owned literature that is available to us today.
01:15:38.960 --> 01:15:51.039
There's it's you know, so many groups and and meetings use still use uh uh Joe C's Beyond Belief book because it is very useful for reflection and and discussion.
01:15:51.359 --> 01:16:16.960
And then there's Bob Bob Kay's book, Bob Kennedy's, there's his uh uh uh Daily Reflections for 12-step life, and then there's uh Bill Bill W's book on the secular 12-steps, but the most recent one that I've learned about is now available on Amazon and elsewhere, I guess, which is called Take What You Can Use and Leave the Rest at the Door.
01:16:17.359 --> 01:16:36.800
And it's it is a wonderful daily reflection of reading book, which is based on first of all the conventional or traditional literature, but then the commentary for discussion that follows it is from that secular viewpoint that we share at our meetings at the secular books study meeting.
01:16:37.039 --> 01:16:44.239
So I just suggest that other people I don't have a link of that right here, but uh just check it up if you can find it.
01:16:44.319 --> 01:16:47.119
And uh yeah, what a wonderful meeting.
01:16:47.279 --> 01:16:56.239
You know, consistently, this meeting around the topic of recovery is the most positive meeting that I attend every week.
01:16:56.399 --> 01:17:04.640
I wish it were larger, it's usually maybe 20 20 people or so, but it could be 120 if people just knew about it.
01:17:04.800 --> 01:17:16.560
So it is listed on the worldwide list, the worldwide secular meeting list, and uh I suggest that to everybody so you can find the meetings that fit right for you.
01:17:16.800 --> 01:17:17.600
Thank you very much.
01:17:17.840 --> 01:17:18.479
That's all.
01:17:21.039 --> 01:17:23.279
Thank you for sharing that with us, Chab.
01:17:23.920 --> 01:17:26.399
Next up we have Stephanie.
01:17:26.479 --> 01:17:27.359
Come on in.
01:17:31.279 --> 01:17:33.359
Hi everyone, I'm Stephanie, I'm an alcoholic.
01:17:33.439 --> 01:17:34.479
Uh, good to see you today.
01:17:34.560 --> 01:17:35.600
Thanks for being here.
01:17:35.920 --> 01:17:38.479
Um yeah, thanks everyone for showing up.
01:17:38.560 --> 01:17:40.800
It's really nice to see over 60 people.
01:17:41.119 --> 01:17:44.479
Um, for me, I wasn't planning on attending the meeting.
01:17:44.560 --> 01:17:46.479
I can't remember why I got involved.
01:17:46.640 --> 01:17:49.199
I think um most of you know Heidi.
01:17:49.439 --> 01:17:56.000
I think it was either Heidi or Tony that were kind of joining um a meeting together, and I thought it might be interesting to go along.
01:17:56.239 --> 01:17:59.920
And I don't think I expected to stay as long as I have.
01:18:00.079 --> 01:18:02.399
Um, I also got thrown into service.
01:18:02.640 --> 01:18:08.800
Or, you know, I think most of us know that if you are if Tony asks you something, you probably should say yes.
01:18:08.960 --> 01:18:14.159
Um, so whether or not I was made to host because of that meeting, I it it's done wonders.
01:18:14.479 --> 01:18:24.560
Um I really learned through coming to these meetings, especially coming to book study, is that everything is open to interpretation for the individual.
01:18:24.880 --> 01:18:43.920
And to for me, I I think I was a bit closed-minded when I first came in to the, especially to the book study, not just because I mean, I don't have a belief or anything, but I thought it was just going to be a very critiquey, negative space of taking the big book and throwing it into the trash and setting it on fire.
01:18:44.000 --> 01:18:45.680
Um, and I've learned that's not the case.
01:18:45.840 --> 01:18:47.840
I've definitely learned that's not the case.
01:18:48.079 --> 01:18:56.399
Um, it was very fascinating to me going through the plain language big book because to me, I've seen it as one of the most beautiful pieces of literature.
01:18:56.560 --> 01:19:00.079
Um, just for people who, you know, English is not their first language.
01:19:00.239 --> 01:19:12.000
Uh, the intention of AA World Service is to make it accessible to people who can't tolerate, well, not even tolerate, who can't do the mental gymnastics of trying to get the old traditional language out.
01:19:12.159 --> 01:19:15.279
You know, I really liked the plain language and the aim that it served.
01:19:15.520 --> 01:19:19.840
But I realized that going to that, going to the meeting, other people had very different opinions.
01:19:19.920 --> 01:19:25.680
And it really opened my mind that it is open to my own interpretation and everyone else has their own.
01:19:25.920 --> 01:19:32.479
Um, it's been nice to hear more from attending this meeting what people relate to.
01:19:32.640 --> 01:20:00.640
You know, for some of us, like going through it, some people are really wanting to understand, you know, why AA World Service and all these meetings and all these publications have existed, like, and then going into you know what we do now and one big tent and and listening to readings from the 1970s from people, like that's been amazing to especially to hear the you know, the timeline of AA and how we've got from 1970 to 2026.
01:20:00.880 --> 01:20:04.640
Like that's been a really big mind, uh, sort of, yeah.
01:20:04.720 --> 01:20:06.800
This is what happens at seven o'clock in the morning.
01:20:07.119 --> 01:20:31.039
But I think what I've learned more about this is I don't really I've become more closer with the people that attend the meeting because I actually now understand why their motivation is to come to secular AA, not just because of the dogma and they're sick of the traditional AA dogma, but because they're curious, you know, inquisitive, they want to find their own way to make things work for them, and I'm the same.
01:20:31.119 --> 01:20:41.680
Um, I've come to realize that, you know, it's not so much that when we were doing the 12 and 12, yeah, it was kind of not my favorite, but I've I've really come to appreciate that book, for example.
01:20:41.920 --> 01:20:51.199
You know, it's just been a really kind of a shift in my mind to stay a bit more open-minded and to realize that I don't have to have it figured out.
01:20:51.279 --> 01:20:54.000
And even my own interpretation can change on the daily.
01:20:54.159 --> 01:20:57.520
Um, I think today I'm probably more um understanding.
01:20:57.600 --> 01:21:16.319
And especially it was really nice to hear from Rob in the Australian context, um, because I'm only starting to learn the New Zealand context, you know, and it's just it's nice to remind myself that yeah, the geographical regions of which people attend meetings, participate in AA is very different.
01:21:16.479 --> 01:21:21.359
Um, it took us, I think, eight months to get the plain language big book from America.
01:21:21.600 --> 01:21:36.720
Um, so you know, it's just it's just fascinating to see how this fellowship kind of works and realize that, yeah, I you know, I got sober in Canada, came back to Australia, now in New Zealand, and all three geographical locations have a big history of AA behind it, which I'm really curious about.
01:21:36.880 --> 01:21:38.640
So um it's good to see you.
01:21:38.720 --> 01:21:41.760
Um, I will say thank you so much, Robin, because you got me up as well.
01:21:42.079 --> 01:21:47.199
Wouldn't have got out of bed if it wasn't for knowing that someone else on my side of the world is going to get up at the same time.
01:21:47.359 --> 01:21:50.560
So um, and thank you, Tony, for everything that you do in the meeting.
01:21:50.720 --> 01:21:57.840
Um, Tony, I've been hosting the meeting for nearly on six months, and yeah, don't think I couldn't do it if Tony wasn't there.
01:21:57.920 --> 01:21:59.199
So I really appreciate you.
01:21:59.279 --> 01:22:00.239
And thanks for being here.
01:22:03.279 --> 01:22:06.159
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Stephanie.
01:22:06.399 --> 01:22:08.399
Next up, we have Steph.
01:22:08.560 --> 01:22:09.920
Oh, come on in.
01:22:10.239 --> 01:22:18.800
Hi, I'm Stephanie Alcoholic, and my sobriety date is November 6th, 2022.
01:22:19.520 --> 01:22:24.640
So I I went into a uh a rehab program.
01:22:24.800 --> 01:22:32.720
It was not residential because it was pandemic still, and it was through my medical uh provider.
01:22:34.079 --> 01:22:41.840
And I had been sober in the 90s for about 10 years, so this was my second go-around.
01:22:42.319 --> 01:22:45.840
And I I was 70 years old.
01:22:45.920 --> 01:22:50.720
I couldn't, I couldn't afford to uh do it again, so I had to do it right.
01:22:50.960 --> 01:23:01.600
So in that program, uh a very wise counselor suggested that I check out secular AA and secular other uh recovery meetings.
01:23:01.760 --> 01:23:04.800
And I was sort of binged at the end of December.
01:23:04.880 --> 01:23:18.239
I was binging on meetings, and one of the meetings I went to was the very first meeting of the secular big book study group, and I've been with it ever since.
01:23:19.279 --> 01:23:29.359
What I learned from my first recovery was that I needed meetings, that uh meetings are definitely part of my recovery.
01:23:29.600 --> 01:23:36.000
And I just thought, well, hell, if I'm gonna uh get involved in AA, I better read the big book.
01:23:36.159 --> 01:23:38.720
And I knew I wasn't gonna read it on my own.
01:23:39.039 --> 01:23:42.720
So what a what a boon this group was for me.
01:23:42.960 --> 01:24:05.520
And we went through it once, and we went through the 12 and 12, and then we went through the big book again, and then when we went through the plain language big book, I'm kind of big booked to death, but it was uh so important to me that I'm a little um shy about never helping other people go through it.
01:24:05.760 --> 01:24:11.119
So I don't know where we're going from here, but I'm glad to be in this community.
01:24:11.279 --> 01:24:12.479
Thanks so much.
01:24:14.720 --> 01:24:17.760
Thank you so much, Steph, for sharing with us.
01:24:18.000 --> 01:24:20.640
Next up, we have Juan Leonard.
01:24:21.840 --> 01:24:23.520
Yeah, I'm sorry, Juan.
01:24:23.600 --> 01:24:25.119
We didn't have a good enough connection.
01:24:25.199 --> 01:24:28.319
We could not hear them and him um uh today.
01:24:28.479 --> 01:24:31.600
Perhaps he can move to a different place or something.
01:24:35.039 --> 01:24:37.199
Don't see any other hands up.
01:24:39.119 --> 01:24:41.119
Margarita, I'll hand it back to you.
01:24:41.279 --> 01:24:41.920
Thank you very much.
01:24:42.239 --> 01:24:45.760
Well, does your group have this is Margarita Alcohol Free?
01:24:45.840 --> 01:24:52.159
Does your group um uh have uh uh a special way of closing?
01:24:52.800 --> 01:24:56.640
Or um do you want to do our our our song together today?
01:24:59.279 --> 01:25:04.560
Uh usually we just close with somebody reading the responsibility statement.
01:25:05.199 --> 01:25:12.880
Uh so but if you'd like to do your song, uh we could do your song.
01:25:13.359 --> 01:25:13.600
Okay.
01:25:15.359 --> 01:25:16.319
It is okay.
01:25:16.479 --> 01:25:18.239
It's a it's a very simple one.
01:25:18.399 --> 01:25:25.279
Everyone can uh unmute now and uh join in, get get ready to clap.
01:25:26.000 --> 01:25:27.439
We're not a glum lot.
01:25:28.159 --> 01:25:31.039
If you're sober and clap.
01:25:32.800 --> 01:25:33.680
If you're sober.
01:25:52.960 --> 01:25:54.079
Thank you, everyone.
00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:08.000
Welcome everyone to Secular AA's global tour of monthly speaker meetings featuring secular AA groups across the globe.
00:00:08.160 --> 00:00:18.079
I am Mariani and that's Alcohol Free and have a few announcements before we welcome our guests from the Secular Book Study AA group.
00:00:18.559 --> 00:00:27.280
I want to thank everyone supporting this monthly meeting with spreading the word, hosting, security by recording, editing, and postings.
00:00:27.839 --> 00:00:34.640
And everyone else here too for showing up, but namely Tony, Claudia, and Veronica and Fabio.
00:00:34.960 --> 00:00:37.840
Thank you for all your behind the scenes work.
00:00:38.399 --> 00:00:49.280
Regarding simultaneous translation, thanks to Fabio and Veronica, we can provide simultaneous translation from English to Spanish to Spanish to English.
00:00:49.439 --> 00:01:00.399
To choose to listen in English only or Spanish only, find the globe icon labeled interpretation on your toolbar and select your preferred language.
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On a mobile device, you'll have to select the more or three dots and select the language.
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Today's speakers from Secular Book Study will be presenting in English, followed by an open discussion from participants who can share in English or in Spanish, because you will be translated into the other language simultaneously.
00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.959
Today's 90-minute event is brought to you by Secular AA.
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Our format is secular.
00:01:31.200 --> 00:01:40.799
The people who are here all have different beliefs, and we hope that everyone can feel free to express themselves without fear of dissuasion or persuasion.
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We do not use prayer from any religions in the meeting.
00:01:44.719 --> 00:01:48.799
And now I have a couple of announcements.
00:01:51.120 --> 00:02:03.760
And first of all, registration and held hotel booking are open for secular AA's next in-person international conference taking place in Arizona.
00:02:03.840 --> 00:02:06.799
That's IXA Phoenix 2026.
00:02:07.040 --> 00:02:14.240
The dates and location are set for November 13th through 15th at the Hilton Phoenix Resort in the Peak.
00:02:14.960 --> 00:02:31.120
In the chat, you'll find the link to register for$150, the link to book hotel suites at a conference rate of$154 a night, which is offered from November 10th through the 18th.
00:02:31.199 --> 00:02:34.960
So three days before and three days after the actual conference.
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Find links to the Ixafenix web web pages also in the chat.
00:02:42.719 --> 00:02:43.919
New today.
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So please come.
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And in the spirit, two things important I'm going to announce about happening then.
00:03:55.919 --> 00:04:01.520
In the spirit of rotation, there will be several vacancies to fill on the board of Secular AA.
00:04:01.759 --> 00:04:10.159
And folks interested in nominating themselves or others will find links to information on getting names before the general membership.
00:04:10.319 --> 00:04:22.720
And second, we need a location for the next in-person international conference of Secular AA after 2026 in Phoenix for 2028.
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Groups interested in nominating their city can find links to instructions in the chat as well.
00:04:30.160 --> 00:04:35.199
Okay, and before I hand over the meeting, let me just give you a preview.
00:04:35.360 --> 00:04:41.680
Next month on the first Sunday, we are featuring We Agnostics of Michiana.
00:04:41.920 --> 00:04:46.000
They're on the border of Michigan and Indiana, and that's September 6th.
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Simultaneous translation, same uh Zoom channel and time and everything, and that information will be added to the chat.
00:04:54.959 --> 00:05:14.720
And now for the main event, we are very pleased to welcome today's MC, Stephanie F, who will introduce the group, the Secular Book Study, and himself, as well as today's speakers, Joe S, who's uh hailing from North Dakota right now, aren't you?
00:05:14.879 --> 00:05:21.439
Tony F out of Pittsburgh, Robin in Australia, and the ever-grateful Jeb of Colorado.
00:05:21.519 --> 00:05:28.879
Um they will share for about 15, 20 minutes each, followed by opportunities for all participants to share about three minutes each.
00:05:29.120 --> 00:05:34.959
The meeting usually lasts about 90 minutes, but we're happy to keep going for all who wish to share.
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May and welcome everyone here and welcome Secular Book Study group.
00:05:41.040 --> 00:05:45.360
Uh and Stephanie, uh please unmute to begin.
00:05:46.240 --> 00:05:49.199
Hello, my name is Stephanie, and I'm an alcoholic.
00:05:49.360 --> 00:05:54.160
It's my honor today to introduce the Secular Book Study.
00:05:54.319 --> 00:06:00.560
Uh, this meeting began four years ago and was originally called the Secular Big Book Study.
00:06:00.879 --> 00:06:15.120
As uh, you know, for the first several years, uh the um group came together once a week and would read different parts of the big book and share from a secular perspective.
00:06:15.360 --> 00:06:24.079
Um in about at about the end of 2025, it's being the plain language big book.
00:06:24.240 --> 00:06:30.720
Um the group then determined to uh read uh some different recovery materials.
00:06:31.199 --> 00:06:42.639
Uh so uh the first book that we started with was Dale Kay's uh A Secular Sobriety uh of 12 secular steps by Bill W.
00:06:42.959 --> 00:06:45.600
No, not that Bill W, a different Bill W.
00:06:46.240 --> 00:06:54.240
Uh and uh finally we are now reading uh One Big Ten, which was published by the great uh the AA Great Vine.
00:06:54.959 --> 00:07:01.920
So as I said, it started four years ago, uh, but the format has remained largely the same.
00:07:02.079 --> 00:07:17.360
Uh first we come together and we started out uh by uh having an actual person reading the text, and we've since moved on to using an AI uh version of uh somebody reading the text to us.
00:07:17.600 --> 00:07:25.439
And then uh we would share on the reading, um, just taking turns in, you know, kind of the typical fashion.
00:07:25.759 --> 00:07:39.839
And we um also uh leave room, of course, for anybody who needed a check-in for the day, uh keeping the individual recovery at the forefront of our meeting.
00:07:40.079 --> 00:07:48.959
So I wanted to take just a minute to uh read to you what we read at the beginning of every meeting, which is our welcome statement.
00:07:50.240 --> 00:07:59.120
Studying the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous has been a formidable task for those of us with a secular perspective or a non-religious mind.
00:07:59.360 --> 00:08:10.240
The words as written, the religious angle, and the time in which it was penned has challenged some alcoholics to weave the language into modern day terms and modern day realities.
00:08:11.120 --> 00:08:19.120
At the time it was first published, there were only a handful of groups of sober alcoholics banded together in a common union.
00:08:19.279 --> 00:08:26.879
To others, it was the only communication they had from other alcoholics that had an answer to a seemingly hopeless situation.
00:08:27.439 --> 00:08:34.080
From this text, millions have gone on to a lifetime of sobriety, unity, love, and service to others.
00:08:34.320 --> 00:08:48.720
Without the efforts of the founding members in their selfless pursuit to bring their message to other alcoholics, there would be no such thing as Alcoholics Anonymous, and those millions that have found a way out might have perished or worse.
00:08:49.120 --> 00:09:03.679
As we read the words today, let's keep in mind the honest desire the writers had to save as many of us as they could using the language that they had, living in the world they did, and sharing the personal experiences they survived.
00:09:03.840 --> 00:09:11.279
Uh, I started this group really close to after uh I first got sober.
00:09:11.679 --> 00:09:23.519
And within three days, this was one of the first groups that I really started doing service with uh and have really found a group of very caring people that I've been able to learn from as well as share with.
00:09:23.679 --> 00:09:28.960
So it's my honor to be introducing the secular book study to you today.
00:09:29.120 --> 00:09:37.600
Uh so with no further ado, I will introduce our first speaker uh who does so much work for this group.
00:09:37.759 --> 00:09:39.759
So come on in, Tony F.
00:09:41.279 --> 00:09:42.159
Thanks, Stephanie.
00:09:42.320 --> 00:09:43.120
Hi, I'm Tony.
00:09:43.200 --> 00:09:44.480
I'm an alcoholic.
00:09:44.879 --> 00:09:50.960
And um probably recognize me from this series if you come to the Global Speaker Tour a lot.
00:09:51.039 --> 00:09:55.200
I'm usually the person that doesn't talk that much, nowhere near as much as, say, Margarita.
00:09:55.519 --> 00:10:03.519
Um, but I'm coming today to represent just a one of the small number of people at the Secular Book Study Group.
00:10:03.679 --> 00:10:13.759
And everything, I agree with everything that uh Stephanie shared, but I wanted to also offer a little bit of the context of like why it's important and valuable to me.
00:10:14.000 --> 00:10:19.039
Um so I I'm sober for about six and a half years now.
00:10:19.279 --> 00:10:21.759
I live over in Pittsburgh, PA.
00:10:22.480 --> 00:10:28.879
And I technically, I think, you know, my my early sobriety was during COVID, during lockdown.
00:10:28.960 --> 00:10:30.320
But I got sober right before.
00:10:30.559 --> 00:10:45.120
In fact, my first my month, my month of IOP when I self-detoxed like a moron and nearly killed myself with you know trying to cut clean all of a sudden, was in those little tiny rooms full of people where you're all like uncomfortably staring at each other in a circle.
00:10:45.440 --> 00:10:48.080
Great for you know pandemics.
00:10:48.320 --> 00:11:03.840
Um, but then right after that month of IOP, then the lockdown happened and I was faced with not being able to go anywhere, which was great for me because previously I would have wanted to go to my old pub downtown, and um now it was shut down.
00:11:03.919 --> 00:11:10.000
So all I could do was go to online recovery meetings and try to find a place of home for myself.
00:11:10.480 --> 00:11:19.440
I'd learn some tricks, I'd learn some some education on the um how to stay sober at the basic level from IOP.
00:11:19.519 --> 00:11:20.080
What do they call it?
00:11:20.159 --> 00:11:28.080
You know, IOP is a great intensive outpatient recovery or rehab is a great place to learn AA while paying five, ten thousand dollars.
00:11:28.399 --> 00:11:29.759
Um anyway.
00:11:30.639 --> 00:11:40.720
So during that, during that early time of my recovery, I was searching for a group, and I did find my home group, which is another group, but I had a dabbled in traditional meetings.
00:11:41.039 --> 00:11:44.960
And I had actually in my IOP, I had been looking for a way to connect with the big book.
00:11:45.039 --> 00:11:46.159
I was motivated by my recovery.
00:11:46.240 --> 00:11:59.840
In fact, I bought a copy of the big book, fourth edition, and bought a friend of it, or a friend of mine in recovery the same time, a copy, cracked it open, got through you know the first two or three chapters, and it hit we agnostics like, what the fuck is this shit?
00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:01.519
Excuse me, sorry for swearing.
00:12:02.080 --> 00:12:20.879
Um, I was really turned off by the traditional language, and it was hard for me to get past the language there to see the the voice of recovery behind the poetry of the Christian backing, uh Christian background, rather.
00:12:21.120 --> 00:12:23.519
And I put it back down for a long time.
00:12:23.679 --> 00:12:30.480
You know, I worked my recovery program, but a lot of it was through, you know, AAA Agnostica, which is a great resource for people doing secular recovery.
00:12:30.720 --> 00:12:33.600
And I very rarely really cracked open the fake book.
00:12:33.840 --> 00:12:41.120
And um until I had a my first sponsee, they were interested in getting more connected with traditional literature.
00:12:41.279 --> 00:13:18.240
They wanted to learn more about that and incorporate that into the recovery, and they actually drove to start the secular big book study group and start a forum for people, like-minded people, secular recovery people, to come together in a place of uh of a mutual approach to approach the big book and the 12 and 12 and come from a perspective of okay, what what value can we pull from this that is well while acknowledging or at least understanding there's a mutual acknowledgement of this um God-filled language and the and the challenges it offers.
00:13:18.320 --> 00:13:22.399
So it's like acknowledgement of the challenges and pulling of the of the value.
00:13:24.399 --> 00:13:26.080
And I think it was great.
00:13:26.159 --> 00:13:28.399
We started much more formal with it.
00:13:28.559 --> 00:13:34.000
We actually assigned presenters for each each week was a different chapter of the big book, and we had people presenting it.
00:13:34.159 --> 00:13:37.360
They had like presentations lined up, a lot of work.
00:13:37.919 --> 00:13:39.919
Very hard, very hard to maintain, too.
00:13:40.080 --> 00:13:47.120
There was a f there was an intention of recording them and having them available as like little seminars on a website, and that didn't pan out.
00:13:47.200 --> 00:13:57.279
But what did come from it was I think even more valuable, which was a tight-knit group of I would estimate anywhere from 20 to 28 people a week keeping coming in.
00:13:57.440 --> 00:13:59.039
Um, not the same people even.
00:13:59.120 --> 00:14:10.960
We have a lot of newcomers that come into that come together to read the current reading or listen to the current reading and offer their thoughts and the value that the reading may have, either being familiar with it already or not.
00:14:11.279 --> 00:14:18.399
For me, it's been a wonderful opportunity to hear from people in the past who are who are just like me.
00:14:18.480 --> 00:14:23.279
You know, they may have different backgrounds, they may have different interpretations of how the world works or whatever.
00:14:23.440 --> 00:14:30.240
Um but the perspective of how to stay sober is the same, um, or at least the desire to stay sober is the same.
00:14:32.559 --> 00:14:43.120
It was important for me to actually maintain this connection and this ability to connect with other people and traditional, more traditional A backgrounds, because connection is the opposite of addiction, I think is how the saying goes.
00:14:43.519 --> 00:14:53.440
And I wanted to be able to talk the talk while I'm walking the walk with Big Book and 12 and 12 and all the other good pieces of literature.
00:14:53.600 --> 00:14:58.000
And this has proved to be an amazing meeting for that um for that effort.
00:14:58.639 --> 00:15:07.039
I didn't want to feel different, I didn't want to feel separated because, in my opinion, feeling different or separated from the overall group, feeling othered out.
00:15:07.279 --> 00:15:10.080
Not because they're othering me, but because I'm othering myself.
00:15:10.240 --> 00:15:11.679
Like, oh, they're they're different.
00:15:11.759 --> 00:15:12.879
I don't need to associate myself.
00:15:12.960 --> 00:15:13.759
I I'm special.
00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:23.600
My addiction will latch on to that feeling of feeling special, and all of a sudden I'm gonna feel real feel real drunk because I'll be drinking because I'm so special I don't need to do what they're doing.
00:15:24.240 --> 00:15:34.960
Um so it was very important to me to be able to understand the intention of the book, even though there's a lot of archaic and outdated language.
00:15:35.440 --> 00:15:46.960
You know, obviously there's some common s common problems in the big book, like we agnostics, to wives, to the fa I think to the I forget the exact name of the chapter, but to the family, the family afterward, I think.
00:15:47.200 --> 00:15:49.840
Um to employers is another good one.
00:15:50.399 --> 00:15:54.720
Even even some parts of there is a solution, really ruddy the wrong way.
00:15:54.960 --> 00:16:04.080
And it's great to have a meeting that I can come to, read it together, voice, like let that pressure out, be like, this this part pisses me off, but this is pretty good, you know.
00:16:04.240 --> 00:16:07.840
We agnostics, this part pisses me off, but the bedevilness is fantastic.
00:16:07.919 --> 00:16:09.679
I love that part of the big book.
00:16:09.840 --> 00:16:12.159
Um, it's just great to find commonality.
00:16:13.679 --> 00:16:27.600
It was also a great opportunity for me in this meeting to have the chance to, when we were doing more presentation style effort, to present more research-oriented um content for individual chapters.
00:16:27.840 --> 00:16:41.200
For example, we were going through the 12 and 12, um I think in two different occasions, and my chapter that I volunteered to do was on step 11, on meditation and prayer.
00:16:41.519 --> 00:16:59.759
You might think, or I had thought at the time, meditation and prayer, well, I know about I know half of the chapter we'll be worrying about, but in fact, it ended up being um it was a great exercise to understand that meditation and prayer uh for step 11.
00:17:01.279 --> 00:17:10.640
There's more to it than just praying to your God and then praying for it to your your your addiction, your problem to be taken from you, to be relieved of you.
00:17:10.880 --> 00:17:17.200
There's a uh there's a mental state that comes involved with obviously with meditation, but also with prayer.
00:17:17.440 --> 00:17:24.960
Um I think there's actually a like a secular way that we can approach prayer without it necessarily taking religious overtone.
00:17:25.359 --> 00:17:40.880
Um in fact, the famous or maybe perhaps infamous prayer, the um the prayer of Saint Francis, I think the S the actual term, um, which isn't actually of Saint Francis, it's actually somebody else's who made it up.
00:17:41.200 --> 00:17:57.119
We are able to diagram that prayer as part of a meeting at the big at the book study group and come and identify where the prayer lines correspond to each of the steps of the 12 steps and also like honesty, openness, and willingness.
00:17:57.359 --> 00:18:09.359
And so we're able to understand like this, these are prayers, however, they're really just talking twelve steps and the honesty, openness, and willingness, but they're being done through this poetry of of a Christian background.
00:18:09.599 --> 00:18:29.920
And so being able to come to this meeting and pull back the veil of this overtone of religiousness really helped me find value and find sobriety in this in these old traditional literatures.
00:18:30.079 --> 00:18:34.720
When honestly, I don't need that this day and age to stay sober.
00:18:34.880 --> 00:18:42.640
I could easily live the next 10, 20, 50 years of my life just doing online secular meetings and being very lucky for that.
00:18:42.799 --> 00:18:48.880
But I think it's very important for me to not feel to not feel special, to not feel like I have to differentiate myself.
00:18:48.960 --> 00:18:56.319
I'd love to maintain that connection with where the where the program came from, where other people are are coming from with their recovery.
00:18:56.720 --> 00:19:12.160
And it's also really important for me to continue to do service in this meeting because as I mentioned before, we have a bunch of newcomers that keep coming to the meeting, brand, fresh new people looking for um alternatives traditional to traditional meetings.
00:19:12.400 --> 00:19:18.480
They're coming in to this call with um, hey, I've got two days sober.
00:19:18.559 --> 00:19:21.119
I've tried a traditional meeting, but it's really not for me.
00:19:21.279 --> 00:19:24.960
And I want to hear what what you guys have to say about secular big book.
00:19:25.039 --> 00:19:26.720
That's wild to me.
00:19:26.880 --> 00:19:40.799
And it's just really amazing to be able to be um there helping host a meeting and helping put on a meeting and contribute to a meeting that I feel I would be looking for if I were getting sober today.
00:19:40.960 --> 00:19:44.480
Um I would be looking for like, okay, I'm motivated to be in recovery.
00:19:44.640 --> 00:19:45.920
I've heard about this big book.
00:19:46.079 --> 00:19:48.799
It's kind of turning me off when I'm getting to these God words.
00:19:48.960 --> 00:19:49.920
Maybe there's more to it.
00:19:50.079 --> 00:19:51.039
Let me go look online.
00:19:51.119 --> 00:19:52.640
Oh, hey, look, there's this meeting.
00:19:52.799 --> 00:20:02.799
And it's just great to be able to come to that meeting and find value and find good sobriety and recovery from the peop from the other people I've gotten to know in this meeting.
00:20:03.680 --> 00:20:10.079
Um trying to make sure I'm on time.
00:20:11.200 --> 00:20:31.200
The the last part I want to mention about why this meeting is important to me is because I come I came to this meeting originally with a motivation to support my sponsee and to support them with getting this meeting off the ground.
00:20:31.359 --> 00:20:41.200
Um, but what it's actually taught me is there's it's good to stretch myself, it's good to change, and it's good to get out of ruts that I don't even realize I'm in.
00:20:41.279 --> 00:20:56.880
And one of the ruts I was in was avoiding traditional literature and avoiding uh taking a more structured academic approach to you know learning about the history, learning about the big book, learning about the 12 steps and 12 traditions and other materials there.
00:20:57.200 --> 00:21:11.920
And it's really helped my recovery just by continuing to grow in that aspect and get those broader perspectives because it's so easy for me to pigeonhole myself and just stay focused to my one home group and my little my little extra dabbling I do elsewhere.
00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:18.640
Um and I think it's helped me and my sobriety to um continue to be a part of this meeting.
00:21:18.960 --> 00:21:25.200
So I wanted to say thank you to the Global Speaker Tour for letting us come today and talk to you all.
00:21:25.359 --> 00:21:28.079
And uh I'll go ahead and hand it back to Stephanie.
00:21:32.559 --> 00:21:35.440
Thank you so much for sharing that with us, Tony.
00:21:35.920 --> 00:21:44.640
Next up, we have uh Robin from Australia who joins us while this takes place for many of us Wednesday evenings.
00:21:45.279 --> 00:21:48.720
Uh for him, it is Thursday morning.
00:21:48.960 --> 00:21:51.759
So, Robin, come on in and share with us.
00:21:57.599 --> 00:21:58.720
Good morning.
00:21:58.960 --> 00:21:59.279
Um
00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:04.319
And it is morning half past two for me.
00:22:04.880 --> 00:22:09.039
So I'm not going to be as bright and erudite as the last speaker.
00:22:10.880 --> 00:22:12.559
Robin Alcoholic.
00:22:13.039 --> 00:22:17.839
So thanks, Margaretha, and everyone for putting this on this morning.
00:22:18.960 --> 00:22:25.519
For me, I come from a very different place to Tony with this.
00:22:25.839 --> 00:22:47.279
So I've been sober for 43 years and have been involved in AA in Australia, which already is, you know, right from the get-go, is very culturally different to American recovery.
00:22:47.359 --> 00:22:58.079
And our history in Australia with the with the with the literature is um when I came in, um no one even opened the book.
00:22:58.559 --> 00:23:03.440
There was no relationship to any information really at all.
00:23:03.519 --> 00:23:10.799
And our our history was that the big book, we were one of the first countries in the world to get the big book.
00:23:11.119 --> 00:23:22.400
And um a guy called Archie McKinnon, who was a psych nurse, started Alcoholics Um Anonymous here, and he wasn't an alcoholic.
00:23:22.720 --> 00:23:36.000
So Alcoholics Anonymous here was was a skid row, mainly illiterate um deal, which meant that it was a it was all story time.
00:23:36.799 --> 00:23:54.240
So the the history of AA here was that it was all about just sharing very, very long drunklogues, drinking lots of tea, and having smoking competitions, and um it called an hour and a half meeting.
00:23:55.920 --> 00:24:32.720
So our so my relationship to the information in the in the steps grew very slowly, and eventually there was a thing called Joe and Charlie that came around in the 80s, and then the big book hit hit us really hard, and um and then I started to become quite fanatical about it after getting through the steps because my experience was that I didn't I didn't have I still had the obsession to drink for the first five to seven years in AA.
00:24:32.880 --> 00:24:34.480
I did not have an easy time.
00:24:34.559 --> 00:24:36.720
I was 22 years old.
00:24:37.039 --> 00:24:55.440
And um so there was this movement into the steps, which um for me, as um a low-bottom drunk that was you know quite a messy person, I became quite a zealot and fanatical about it.
00:24:55.519 --> 00:25:00.880
I even went to Little Rock, Arkansas and hung out with Joe McQueene and did all this stuff.
00:25:01.200 --> 00:25:26.160
And why I'm saying this is because you know, after this long period of time of having this very strong relationship with the book, and also being an atheist, um I had come to understand the processes that are contained within AA text more than a relationship with the language.
00:25:26.240 --> 00:25:35.279
And also being an older person, and my father was a much older person, the language was not obscure to me.
00:25:35.519 --> 00:25:41.839
It was very it was very easy to understand in a lot of ways.
00:25:42.880 --> 00:25:46.720
Um but there were quite a few meanings that were odd.
00:25:47.119 --> 00:26:03.920
Um so after all that period of time, and then you know, of course, no secular in any way, shape, or form until basically five or six years ago in my in my world, not till the pandemic, did any of that open up?
00:26:04.720 --> 00:27:07.680
That um this has all been quite a shock to my secular and and and looking at looking at the literature as as a secular person in a group has been a completely different world for me because um I've come to what would you say, not very flexible understanding of all of this information, and being you know a semi-retired zealot, um, you know, I've found this this meeting extremely difficult and extremely challenging and also very interesting because I'm listening to points of view and and and it's there's a lot of um in-depth analysis, which for me I really enjoy.
00:27:07.839 --> 00:27:14.559
Like I like to think things through, and I like to hear other people thinking and debating things.
00:27:15.279 --> 00:27:34.079
And while we were focused on the book, I was pretty happy with all of that process, and then we went into some other literature, and my poor little brain just went pop because I couldn't I couldn't comprehend all the other things that we were that we were doing.
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:52.319
And I think this is the point of um alcoholics anonymous for me today, which is to introduce me to and expose me to the modern, you know, all the current alcoholics anonymous and how we perceive things.
00:27:52.559 --> 00:27:55.920
We're actually going through on big tent at the moment.
00:27:57.359 --> 00:28:02.319
And I'm finding it um quite nauseating.
00:28:02.480 --> 00:28:26.480
And and and and the reason that I am is because um there's a there's a there's a current of subservience that people say and rationalize there and and trying to get comfortable with this world of of AA as it's been.
00:28:26.640 --> 00:28:44.880
And and you know, that's that's the thing that that we that we look at here is you know, what are we really saying, and how do we see ourselves as people in secular or atheist or in relationship to literature?
00:28:45.039 --> 00:28:55.599
And you know, I don't really have 15 minutes worth of talking to this morning, so I might give people more chance to talk later.
00:28:55.920 --> 00:29:06.319
But I think the whole point of any meeting is to expand my capacity to um to learn, and this meeting really does that.
00:29:06.480 --> 00:29:18.720
And um, so most of the people that you hear um tonight are going to sound um very humble, and they're not going to really tell you how amazing they are, but I will.
00:29:19.039 --> 00:29:32.640
So someone like Tony is incredibly amazing about what how he analyzes, and there's other members of the group who bring so much to, you know, this AI thing.
00:29:32.799 --> 00:29:34.319
Of course, I'm a relic.
00:29:34.400 --> 00:30:05.200
Um, this AI thing is um bring we're not hearing someone talk, we're hearing this AI non-personality thing describing the literature, reading it out to us, and they give that experience is um there's no real for me there, and this is said in a good way, there's no real reaction to that.
00:30:05.359 --> 00:30:11.519
There's just the information being delivered, and it's a really clear way of hearing something.
00:30:12.079 --> 00:30:36.559
There's no overtones of personality in it, and then there's the analysis, and um yes, it's all it's a very it's a very challenging meeting for me in a lot of ways, but also it's um comforting because I hear what I'm thinking said many, many times by other people, and I also hear things that I never thought said by many people.
00:30:36.720 --> 00:30:39.440
I think isn't that the point of the whole exercise?
00:30:39.680 --> 00:30:46.559
That's all I have to offer this morning, but thank you very much for the opportunity to wake up really early and feel like a Muppet.
00:30:48.960 --> 00:30:53.039
Thank you so much for waking up early and sharing with us, Robin.
00:30:53.599 --> 00:30:56.160
Next up, we have Joe S.
00:30:56.480 --> 00:30:57.920
Come on in, Joe.
00:30:58.799 --> 00:30:59.680
Hi, everyone.
00:30:59.839 --> 00:31:04.319
My name is Joe, and I am in recovery from alcohol abuse and addiction.
00:31:04.720 --> 00:31:08.799
I'm very glad to be here and thanks uh everyone for being here.
00:31:08.960 --> 00:31:19.440
Uh seeing this many people here and knowing that you're doing the work today for what's good for you and your sobriety helps me and my sobriety.
00:31:19.759 --> 00:31:21.359
Um, so I want to say thank you.
00:31:21.519 --> 00:31:24.640
I really appreciate each and every one of you.
00:31:24.880 --> 00:31:29.359
Uh today I have three years and one week of sobriety.
00:31:30.240 --> 00:31:37.599
Um, and I'm very proud of myself for doing the hard work um to stay sober, to be sober today, especially.
00:31:37.839 --> 00:31:43.839
Um when I first went to re I have some notes by the way to keep my head going in a direction.
00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:46.160
So if I look down, that's what I'm looking at.
00:31:46.319 --> 00:31:57.200
Um when I first went to rehab and got sober and began going to meetings, I had no idea how I was going to not drink.
00:31:57.519 --> 00:31:59.920
Um, I was a 24-7 drinker.
00:32:00.079 --> 00:32:03.519
If I wasn't passed out or fallen over, I was drinking.
00:32:03.839 --> 00:32:06.799
Um and uh that was very miserable.
00:32:06.880 --> 00:32:08.720
I was very sad and isolated.
00:32:08.880 --> 00:32:10.799
It was a very dark, dark place.
00:32:11.200 --> 00:32:12.400
Uh and I didn't want to be there.
00:32:12.480 --> 00:32:14.559
I didn't want to be in that dark, dark place.
00:32:14.799 --> 00:32:17.200
Um, but I couldn't get out.
00:32:17.279 --> 00:32:18.640
I didn't know how to get out.
00:32:18.880 --> 00:32:21.680
And honestly, I was trying to kill myself.
00:32:21.759 --> 00:32:24.559
I was trying to die just to end all the pain.
00:32:24.720 --> 00:32:28.640
And I was so frustrated because I was still alive.
00:32:28.720 --> 00:32:29.759
It wasn't working.
00:32:30.000 --> 00:32:37.599
Um, and I felt like, you know, I'm shoving alcohol down my throat and going, why isn't this working?
00:32:37.759 --> 00:32:39.119
Why am I still here?
00:32:39.599 --> 00:32:43.039
Um, and it was just a horrible place to be.
00:32:43.359 --> 00:32:50.160
Um I didn't know I was trying to do that until after I got sober and started the worker recovery.
00:32:50.240 --> 00:32:56.799
I didn't have that perspective until after I stopped drinking and began thinking about that.
00:32:57.039 --> 00:33:00.640
But now I realize that that's that's what I was trying to do.
00:33:01.119 --> 00:33:04.799
Um I live in Denver, Colorado, in the United States.
00:33:04.960 --> 00:33:09.519
I'm currently in mine at North Dakota, um, visiting my husband's family.
00:33:09.680 --> 00:33:14.319
And um we have we have two kids, 19 and 15 years old.
00:33:14.480 --> 00:33:51.680
So I'm gonna share a little bit about uh my experience, strength and hope, and also about how the secular book study has really been an important part of my recovery because it has, um, in large part because I'll be able I'm able to look at the words and the stories that have helped others um through I I happen to be an atheist, through my perspective and um and see through the Christian speak of those stories and a lot of the other writings.
00:33:52.400 --> 00:34:04.160
Um acknowledge that Christian perspective and set it aside so that I can see the things that I that might help me, and I'm very um grateful for it.
00:34:04.480 --> 00:34:09.599
Um I grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, a large Catholic family.
00:34:09.760 --> 00:34:11.679
I'm the youngest of 14 kids.
00:34:11.840 --> 00:34:14.239
There's seven girls and seven boys.
00:34:14.559 --> 00:34:16.960
My mother was very Catholic.
00:34:17.360 --> 00:34:27.679
Um and while she didn't work for income, of course, she was very busy with her work at home and her involvement in volunteering with the church.
00:34:27.840 --> 00:34:29.280
My dad was a mechanic.
00:34:29.360 --> 00:34:35.360
He worked night shift at Nabisco, which is a bakery company, um, fixing their machinery.
00:34:35.519 --> 00:34:39.840
Um both my parents were in World War II.
00:34:39.920 --> 00:34:48.159
My dad was an airplane mechanic in the army, and my mom uh worked in a munitions factory as a Rosie the Riveter type.
00:34:48.559 --> 00:34:53.039
If you're familiar with that, um with that.
00:34:53.199 --> 00:35:01.599
Um so I'm 57 years old today, and I didn't I got sober when I was 54.
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:15.280
Yeah, that would have been made me um and uh just to understand, yeah, growing up we're very very working class, we didn't have a lot of money.
00:35:15.840 --> 00:35:21.360
Um and while I always had a roof over my head, it was not a safe roof.
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:31.840
Um I'm very now I'm now very close to some of my siblings, and I am very much not in touch with others.
00:35:32.719 --> 00:35:35.519
Um my siblings.
00:35:35.840 --> 00:35:37.360
My father died when I was seven.
00:35:37.440 --> 00:35:40.800
He had a heart attack on Father's Day, he was in his late 50s.
00:35:41.360 --> 00:35:55.679
Um that experience, along with many other experiences, both when I was a child, teenager, young adult, and as a grown adult, um exposed me to a lot of pain.
00:35:56.159 --> 00:36:07.119
And I was born into and lived in an environment that was not conducive to dealing or understanding or addressing that pain.
00:36:07.280 --> 00:36:21.920
Um my my parents, well, my dad died when I was still very young, but my mom had no um uh she had no idea how to deal with this stuff either.
00:36:22.239 --> 00:36:28.960
Neither of my parents grew up in a uh supportive or helpful situation either.
00:36:29.199 --> 00:36:32.000
Um my mom passed about 20 years ago.
00:36:32.800 --> 00:36:38.639
Um and uh yeah, it wasn't a it wasn't a pleasant growing up.
00:36:38.800 --> 00:36:46.960
Um but alcohol I discovered stopped the pain, or so I thought.
00:36:47.280 --> 00:36:58.239
And um so eventually I was doing nothing but drink, which paradoxically, of course, caused more pain than ever before.
00:36:58.719 --> 00:37:03.519
Um I didn't start drinking until uh I I my mother never drank.
00:37:03.599 --> 00:37:09.360
Um, I knew my dad drank, and I knew that he had alcoholism in his family.
00:37:09.679 --> 00:37:16.559
Um it was a pretty brutal upbringing for him and for my mom as well.
00:37:16.960 --> 00:37:23.519
Um, but while drink while alcohol was involved in my dad's family, it wasn't really in my mom's.
00:37:23.840 --> 00:37:28.800
So um I didn't grow up drinking, I didn't grow up, we didn't have alcohol in the house.
00:37:28.960 --> 00:37:31.360
I just didn't have that exposure at all.
00:37:31.760 --> 00:37:42.159
Um, but in my 20s, I started drinking and didn't drink very much or very often until really my late 30s.
00:37:42.719 --> 00:37:45.280
And uh then it really took a turn.
00:37:45.360 --> 00:37:49.840
Um, where in my 20s I could leave a drink unfinished.
00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:52.000
Uh at some point I couldn't.
00:37:52.159 --> 00:37:54.400
Um, and that was in my late 30s.
00:37:54.480 --> 00:37:59.039
And I mentioned that because, you know, some people start drinking at different times in their lives.
00:37:59.119 --> 00:38:05.039
I mentioned that for me because that's how I came around to my where I am.
00:38:05.679 --> 00:38:22.880
Um, and it really slowed my brain being able to understand that I was an alcoholic and I did have a problem because I kept thinking back to those those years where I would, where it wasn't a problem, where I was drinking and it wasn't a problem until it was.
00:38:23.039 --> 00:38:26.480
Um, so I kept thinking, well, I stopped before, I can stop now.
00:38:26.559 --> 00:38:30.719
I should be able to stop now, I should be able to manage it, it shouldn't be a problem, et cetera, et cetera.
00:38:30.880 --> 00:38:35.440
But um it was, but it took me a while to to ask for help.
00:38:35.599 --> 00:38:41.119
Um, I kept trying to stop on my own, and that that didn't happen.
00:38:41.360 --> 00:38:50.960
Um one when I the the time in my life where I did ask for help because I needed it, um, as many of us do.
00:38:51.280 --> 00:38:53.920
Um one night I was laying in my bed.
00:38:54.000 --> 00:38:55.679
I was very alone, very sick.
00:38:55.840 --> 00:39:02.320
It was very I remember it was physically dark, not just mentally and emotionally dark, but physically dark.
00:39:03.840 --> 00:39:09.599
And the thought came to me, and I might cry, and if I cry, I know that's okay.
00:39:09.760 --> 00:39:10.960
It's okay to cry.
00:39:11.199 --> 00:39:13.360
Um I'm not gonna apologize for crying.
00:39:13.519 --> 00:39:21.760
And but the thought came to me as it the thought had often occurred came to me before that my children would be better off if I were dead.
00:39:22.159 --> 00:39:36.320
What was different in that moment that time it was true that moment that time it was true that they would be better off.
00:39:39.760 --> 00:39:46.159
And then I thought that that can't be true.
00:39:46.320 --> 00:39:50.480
I I love my kids, I care for them, I want to be part of their lives.
00:39:53.119 --> 00:39:57.199
That moment thinking that I I thought that's that's fucked up.
00:39:58.960 --> 00:40:03.679
And then in that next moment, it wasn't true anymore.
00:40:03.840 --> 00:40:07.119
It wasn't true anymore that they would be better off if I were dead.
00:40:07.360 --> 00:40:10.159
And that's when I asked for help and I received help.
00:40:10.239 --> 00:40:19.119
I wanted to read detox and rehab and got sober, and I'm very grateful that I am sober today.
00:40:19.840 --> 00:40:40.559
Um when I first did get sober and started going to meetings, the only exposure I had to people getting sober and and addiction recovery and AA was what I had read about or seen in TV shows or movies, and that was all fiction, of course.
00:40:40.800 --> 00:40:45.519
And I, but I that's all I knew, and I thought, well, I'm not gonna go to meetings, meetings are ridiculous.
00:40:45.679 --> 00:40:55.039
It's you know old white Christian men and folding chairs at the bottom of a church.
00:40:55.199 --> 00:41:05.039
At this time, I was, you know, I was already an atheist thinking I I am gonna have nothing in common with these people and that they're not gonna want me there, and I'm not gonna want to be there.
00:41:05.280 --> 00:41:09.039
Um, I now know that that's not what meetings are.
00:41:09.760 --> 00:41:15.119
That's certainly not my experience with meetings because meetings are a huge part of my my recovery.
00:41:15.360 --> 00:41:24.480
Um and early on in meetings, I remember hearing people talk about long-term, their long-term sobriety years and years.
00:41:24.559 --> 00:41:26.800
And I remember thinking, what are you doing here?
00:41:26.960 --> 00:41:30.159
I was thinking, okay, I'll go to meetings for a year and then I'll be done.
00:41:30.480 --> 00:41:34.480
And um, I now know for me that is not the truth.
00:41:34.719 --> 00:41:42.800
And I am glad that I now listen to myself and trust myself to know that that's not the truth for me right now.
00:41:42.960 --> 00:42:04.719
And I really appreciate meetings, and I specifically appreciate the secular book study meetings because I read the big book and I read a lot of more traditional Christian focused um AA writings.
00:42:05.760 --> 00:42:11.920
And I know I see that they're sober people and they rely on those writings.
00:42:12.000 --> 00:42:21.039
So I know there's something there that works, and different parts of those writings and the community and the fellowship, different parts of them work for different people.
00:42:21.280 --> 00:42:26.960
For some of them, it's the Christian element, but I know I know it's that's not for me.
00:42:27.119 --> 00:42:29.199
That part of it isn't for me.
00:42:29.440 --> 00:42:35.599
And I get really frustrated with any assumptions that it has to, my sobriety has to be a certain way.
00:42:35.920 --> 00:42:38.159
Um, I'm a slightly stubborn.
00:42:38.320 --> 00:42:38.960
That was a joke.
00:42:39.039 --> 00:42:40.960
I'm very stubborn uh person.
00:42:41.119 --> 00:42:52.719
So and I and I I know that if somebody says you have to do this one thing to stay sober, and it doesn't feel right in my gut that that's the thing I need to do, I'm not gonna do it.
00:42:52.880 --> 00:42:54.480
Um, and I know that about me.
00:42:54.639 --> 00:43:35.840
So what I really appreciate about the secular book study is to be able to be an environment where I can share, where I feel I can I can share openly and to help me and also listen to other people and how things help them to look at those writings from a set from their perspective and from my secular perspective and kind of weave through and and acknowledge the environment they were written in, but for me to weave through that and then see more clearly the elements of those writings that will help me, that have helped me, that do help me.
00:43:36.239 --> 00:43:40.480
Um, so I am very grateful for that, uh, for that group.
00:43:40.639 --> 00:43:42.480
Um, and it's been very interesting.
00:43:42.559 --> 00:43:57.840
It's been very helpful to me for the big book study to actually that that one book to study that in it from a secular perspective, because I had no clue to it otherwise, and also to look at other um other writings from a secular perspective as well.
00:43:58.079 --> 00:43:59.760
So that's my experience strength.
00:44:00.320 --> 00:44:06.000
And hope, thank you so much for giving me the space to share that and for inviting me for this.
00:44:06.239 --> 00:44:08.000
I think this is a great group, too.
00:44:08.239 --> 00:44:15.360
I uh love coming to this um monthly once-a-month meeting too, whenever I can.
00:44:15.519 --> 00:44:17.280
So thank you again for the space to share.
00:44:17.360 --> 00:44:18.800
And with that, I will pass.
00:44:22.800 --> 00:44:25.760
Thank you so much sharing with us today, Joe.
00:44:25.920 --> 00:44:29.360
And last but not least, we have the ever-grateful Jeb.
00:44:29.519 --> 00:44:30.639
Come on in, Jeb.
00:44:31.280 --> 00:44:35.360
Yes, my name is Jeb, Grateful Recovered Addict Alcoholic.
00:44:35.519 --> 00:44:54.320
And I want to express my gratitude uh again today to uh all of the people that make these weekly, these monthly meetings possible to get the message spread further and further that that you don't have to be religious in order to find recovery in in AA.
00:44:54.559 --> 00:45:05.920
And I reminded you of a group that that I attend regularly and meetings that that says that anonymity is so important that anonymity is half of their name.
00:45:06.079 --> 00:45:11.840
Well, that means they are not alcoholics anonymous, they are alcoholics and not anonymity.
00:45:12.159 --> 00:45:14.719
And uh, I just have to state that.
00:45:15.119 --> 00:45:23.599
But um, yeah, this uh I love what we've shared here, and I love the way this meeting uh has evolved.
00:45:23.679 --> 00:45:28.000
You know, I don't think it was ever registered and became a registered group or whatever.
00:45:28.159 --> 00:45:32.960
It's essentially a meeting that has had good support over the years and it's evolved.
00:45:33.119 --> 00:45:44.639
We started with doing what is so-called conference approved literature without any understanding of what AA has written about what conference approved literature.
00:45:44.800 --> 00:46:08.000
There is a wonderful bulletin um of uh in the in the guidelines, in the a guidelines on conference approved literature, which makes it very clear that um uh that phrase does not mean that AA as such does not approve of other literature.
00:46:08.159 --> 00:46:31.760
In fact, if you do a Google search on AA conference approved literature, you'll find a lot of things that that means a group, because a group economy can use the Bible, the Torah, uh, you know, or any or other literature, and it can use prayer or not use prayer, but that's up to the group, or guess we'd say it's the meeting.
00:46:32.000 --> 00:47:01.519
So, you know, the I often say that point out that you know it what was it at the 75th anniversary of the publication of what we call the big book now, there they published a facsimile of the big book, which was published not by AA World Services, but by what was it called Works Publishing Company, which eventually became AA World Services.
00:47:01.679 --> 00:47:24.400
So I still say think that AA, for all it is worth, is still primarily a publishing company, and that's where we started with this meeting with um the secular book Sandy meeting, and we started with the big book and with this reading uh from it and discussing it from a secular and and honest perspective.
00:47:24.559 --> 00:47:28.079
Then we did the 12 and 12, and then we did.
00:47:28.320 --> 00:47:51.360
I think we went on to the uh we jumped to uh Dale K's book, Secular Sobriety, which is a a rewrite of the first 64 pages, taking out some of the the magical thinking, and that was satisfying, and then you did oh man, the plain plain language version of the big book.
00:47:51.599 --> 00:48:00.400
Oh, and that's what put all of that magical thinking and writing into modern language, which really drove people away.
00:48:00.639 --> 00:48:18.079
So I think we learned from that, and then we went on to looking beyond uh the the literature that is so-called conference approved, where the copyright is maybe owned by Alcoholics Anonymous or AA World Services.
00:48:18.480 --> 00:48:32.559
And uh we had a great experience in in reading and discussing uh Nathan's book from the uh uh the Reason in Recovery, the six-step program.
00:48:33.039 --> 00:48:38.559
And that you know, that brought really good recovery sharing out, and I love that.
00:48:38.719 --> 00:48:48.159
And we also did uh Bill W, Bill Wolf's uh book on on the 12 steps, and uh that that was good.
00:48:48.559 --> 00:49:02.320
And you know, we're taking advantage of what the the the guidelines say that if it doesn't say conference approved, it doesn't mean that it is not not approved.
00:49:02.559 --> 00:49:13.760
In fact, if you do a Google search on that sort of thing, you'll find places that means a group, because of its autonomy, can use the Bible or something else, and prayers are not prayers and so forth.
00:49:13.920 --> 00:49:17.360
So group groups are distinctive in themselves.
00:49:17.599 --> 00:49:24.960
But this one has become this meeting, has become the most consistent recovery-oriented meeting in my in my week.
00:49:25.039 --> 00:49:29.360
And I still go to a meeting uh every day, sometimes two meetings.
00:49:29.519 --> 00:49:47.119
I think yesterday I went to three meetings, because I need to hear what other people are thinking, what they're doing, what their experience is, and what they're getting out of this this process of of 12-step or six-step recovery or whatever it is, or out of just being a part of the fellowship.
00:49:47.360 --> 00:49:54.320
Um, I uh um I never tire of AA.
00:49:54.719 --> 00:50:00.159
I get tired of of not hearing enough about the solution.
00:50:00.400 --> 00:50:15.920
And when I came into AA, I call it conventional AA, and the sort of thing that I was in for 37 years before secular meetings started growing and people started getting a little bit more honest about themselves.
00:50:16.320 --> 00:50:27.280
Um during that time, I had to do a lot of translation of what people were saying and what the book said in order to under accommodate it.
00:50:27.440 --> 00:50:40.480
And you know, when I read the big book today, I can always add a word, an O to the word God, and so it becomes good, or thinking of it as goodness, and it's not being a person or a being and so forth.
00:50:40.800 --> 00:50:53.119
But uh I I've never thought that AA was a Judeo-Christian movement at all, because the big book actually doesn't reflect that in my experience.
00:50:53.280 --> 00:50:58.079
That that that's what it is for some people, but not for not for me.
00:50:58.320 --> 00:51:08.079
And you know, I've always tried to do what I heard at my first lesson, uh my first meeting, and that was that we do do this one day at a time.
00:51:08.239 --> 00:51:17.760
And so I I've always been a day counter, and today is day 17,508 since my last drink and night of alcohol, and that's a good deal.
00:51:17.840 --> 00:51:28.159
But I have a friend here who has 50 some years, she has 20,000 plus years of of sobriety and recovery, and and and guess what?
00:51:28.320 --> 00:51:30.159
She still goes to meetings.
00:51:30.400 --> 00:51:30.880
Why?
00:51:31.119 --> 00:51:43.119
Because the fellowship is what really makes this work, and I found a kind of fellowship in the secular book study meeting, which taking book big book out of it because we're doing a lot more than the big book.
00:51:43.280 --> 00:51:59.519
Yeah, yeah, I found more recovery in that meeting and wonderful discussions about the things we're reading, and now we're reading from the Grapevine publication, um, One Big Ten, which it's incidentally is not conference approved.
00:51:59.760 --> 00:52:08.960
And I want to say also the guidelines that I was quoting from are not conference approved, but but they're published and put out there by Alcoholics Anonymous.
00:52:09.199 --> 00:52:15.199
So I find that some of this stuff is a little bit confusing and also humorous.
00:52:15.519 --> 00:52:32.400
So um I I look forward to whatever we're going to do next because there seems to be more and more insight into what the problem was and what the process is than um than we thought there was at the beginning.
00:52:32.639 --> 00:52:40.239
And so, you know, essentially what we have is a secular book study meeting.
00:52:40.400 --> 00:52:48.480
And that means we can probably go in any direction to discuss and read any anything that relates to to the recovery.
00:52:48.800 --> 00:52:51.360
And um I appreciate that.
00:52:51.519 --> 00:53:07.360
And I appreciate those who started it and kept things going and the incredible work that our friend Tony does in making the readings and the visuals available for the meeting so that we don't have to get a book out for ourselves.
00:53:07.519 --> 00:53:12.239
We can just see everything up posted on the screen and listen to things.
00:53:12.400 --> 00:53:16.239
And and that that makes it just amazing, an amazing experience.
00:53:16.639 --> 00:53:30.079
Um, I'm I'm I'm so grateful to people like Robin from from down under tune in from the future from the next day, so we can also hear that long-term sobriety perspective.
00:53:30.320 --> 00:53:44.880
And uh, you know, I'm I love this meeting, and I I love what we're doing here with the secular the global speaker tour, because we're getting a sampling of how d diverse Alcoholics Anonymous is.
00:53:45.119 --> 00:53:59.360
And that's the main reason I put the rainbow frame around my screen today, because there is such diversity of opinion, experience, and hope here that uh we get to share with one another.
00:53:59.840 --> 00:54:16.800
So I can't think of anything else real important for me to say except that I am I'll be eternally grateful to the people who started all of this, keep things going, keep offering more that what may hope may hopefully help more and more people around the world.
00:54:17.519 --> 00:54:18.800
Thank you so much.
00:54:23.920 --> 00:54:25.679
Oh I'm just gonna thank him.
00:54:26.719 --> 00:54:29.920
Oh um, you go ahead and then I'll okay.
00:54:30.480 --> 00:54:43.599
All right, um, Margarita here, and I just I wanted to thank the group so much and um uh gonna do a quick um uh uh commercial here about the the seventh tradition.
00:54:43.920 --> 00:54:44.559
Welcome.
00:54:44.719 --> 00:54:49.760
Um as per AA Seventh Tradition, we are self-supporting through own contributions.
00:54:49.920 --> 00:55:01.599
Meetings are free to any who need them, but we do have expenses and appreciate your uh support um for our uh Zoom expenses, postings, and uh the recordings.
00:55:01.679 --> 00:55:11.280
And uh, if you'd like to contribute, you can please visit our website using the link that uh we have also added to the chat or these QR codes here.
00:55:11.679 --> 00:55:24.320
Another um announcement that I I think I skipped over before was about on the second day of the in-person conference, there will be an in-memorium session session.
00:55:24.559 --> 00:55:54.480
So there is a request to please submit photos and names or initial and initial the last name of the any deceased member to Bridget M, um the chair of secular AA, and her their address is in the email addresses in the um in the chat, and um they're hoping to uh collect that by October 15th to um organize a presentation for the Saturday, the 14th of October.
00:55:54.719 --> 00:55:57.920
Um Stephanie Yet is going to moderate.
00:55:58.079 --> 00:56:06.719
Let me just say before um that the meeting is now open for discussion, please raise your virtual hand using the reactions button at the bottom of your screen.
00:56:06.880 --> 00:56:11.599
Please take your chair to three to four minutes so that all who wish to share may.
00:56:11.920 --> 00:56:18.320
Our expectation is that we're here to support each other, and we do encourage you to identify with what has been shared previously.
00:56:18.559 --> 00:56:20.719
The meeting usually lasts about 90 minutes.
00:56:21.119 --> 00:56:26.880
Folks are welcome to stick around after the formal part of the meeting to socialize.
00:56:27.039 --> 00:56:37.599
Um, participants can share in English or Spanish because you will be translated into the other language simultaneously by Verónica or Fabio.
00:56:37.760 --> 00:56:47.440
And to choose to listen in English only or Spanish only, find the globe icon labeled interpretation on your toolbar and select your preferred language.
00:56:47.599 --> 00:56:55.280
And bilingual people, you can stay on the default original setting if you on it uh uh if you want to hear both.
00:56:55.440 --> 00:57:00.159
So um I will pass the uh mic back to Stephanie.
00:57:00.320 --> 00:57:06.960
And thank you so much, secular book study group today for your for your service and your your sharing.
00:57:09.679 --> 00:57:11.679
Thank you so much, Margarita.
00:57:12.000 --> 00:57:22.239
Uh before we move on to sharing, um I did want to send a special thank you to the two groups that make the secular book study possible.
00:57:22.559 --> 00:57:31.119
And that is the folks from our mostly agnostic group of drunks, also known as Omegaud, as well as Reason and Recovery.
00:57:31.280 --> 00:57:34.239
So with that, uh Karen, come on in.
00:57:34.320 --> 00:57:35.519
Oops, sorry, Karen.
00:57:37.519 --> 00:57:39.280
I'm Karen and I'm an alcoholic.
00:57:39.360 --> 00:57:40.480
This is a wonderful meeting.
00:57:40.639 --> 00:57:42.079
I love book groups.
00:57:42.559 --> 00:57:47.280
Um I live in Pinellas County, which is part of the Tampa Bay area.
00:57:47.519 --> 00:57:58.880
And I had the very good fortune to find a group that um for my home group that was very tolerant of whether you were agnostic or atheist or religious.
00:57:59.039 --> 00:58:06.639
But um we have a a little local book group like yours that we call happy hour.
00:58:06.719 --> 00:58:10.559
We like it so much because it meets at five o'clock in the afternoon.
00:58:10.639 --> 00:58:18.079
And we've read everything from Quitlet to Um Al Anon to History of AA.
00:58:18.239 --> 00:58:31.039
And um I recommend anybody to start your own little group, you know, because it is it is we just have warm, fuzzy feelings about AA, and when we meet in that group, it's really special.
00:58:31.360 --> 00:58:37.119
And the other thing that I would I will put um aapinellus.org in the chat.
00:58:37.280 --> 00:58:44.239
If you're in the Tampa Bay area, we have in Dunedin, we have two free thinker groups.
00:58:44.480 --> 00:58:56.159
One is on in person, one is on Wednesday evenings, and the other one is on Saturday after late afternoon, one is an open discussion, and one is an agnostic step meeting.
00:58:56.480 --> 00:59:01.119
So if you're in the area, I welcome you to join either of those meetings.
00:59:01.199 --> 00:59:02.639
They're also in the meeting guide.
00:59:02.719 --> 00:59:05.119
And thanks for having this wonderful meeting.
00:59:05.199 --> 00:59:10.639
And Jeb, thanks for talking more about conference-approved literature.
00:59:11.599 --> 00:59:17.119
People get get their knickers in a twist about that, and it's too bad that they do.
00:59:17.360 --> 00:59:19.280
Thanks everybody for all of this.
00:59:22.079 --> 00:59:24.639
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Karen.
00:59:25.199 --> 00:59:27.519
Margarita, do you want to come in and share?
00:59:27.920 --> 00:59:28.639
Yeah, I will.
00:59:28.800 --> 00:59:34.239
Well, it's uh I usually let others share first, but I thought I'd jump in since nobody's hands were up.
00:59:34.320 --> 00:59:36.639
I'm Margarita, alcohol free.
00:59:36.880 --> 00:59:48.159
Um I um have always loved how Jeb counts his days, and I am celebrating 1869 days of waking up glad I didn't have a drink the day before.
00:59:48.480 --> 00:59:52.559
And uh I am uh and an ever-grateful Margarita.
00:59:52.960 --> 01:00:07.840
I um I'm so glad that I get to stay coming to meetings even after having a year of sobriety, because this community means the the world to me.
01:00:08.000 --> 01:00:14.800
Um, a lot of people uh who know me know that our family has gone through a rough couple of weeks lately.
01:00:14.960 --> 01:00:20.239
We uh we just had a great, you know, move successful into our new home.
01:00:20.400 --> 01:00:28.639
And um, and then we got news that our dog that we were going to bring to live with us passed away unexpectedly, 11-year-old, and that broke our hearts.
01:00:28.880 --> 01:00:32.639
And then four days later, my uh father-in-law passed away.
01:00:32.800 --> 01:00:52.239
So um I have I I feel sad, but also so fortunate because I have um so much loving support thanks to this community and such great um you know examples.
01:00:52.559 --> 01:00:55.760
I I'm no longer afraid of my emotions.
01:00:55.920 --> 01:00:57.599
I know they're not gonna last forever.
01:00:57.760 --> 01:00:58.639
I know they're okay.
01:00:58.800 --> 01:01:04.400
I've learned I can do hard emotions, and it's thanks to uh to this community.
01:01:04.639 --> 01:01:13.599
Um and yeah, it's it's it's hard, but it's also just so much reasons, many reasons I have I have gratitude.
01:01:13.920 --> 01:01:20.800
Um, just thinking about all the people who who are here today and who make this happen.
01:01:20.960 --> 01:01:45.920
This is such a a fantastic community of um, you know, international, like just from the difference of being so isolated and alone in hot and you know in the depths of my active addiction compared to this, where I have people I can reach out to all over the world now and uh you know who are it's not superficial anymore, you know, it's it's loving.
01:01:46.159 --> 01:01:56.000
And uh I'm um so yeah, I'm glad that uh you don't just need to go to a meeting for one year and then and then you're you're done.
01:01:56.320 --> 01:02:02.320
Um but uh I just I just had to give a shout out to also to Tony.
01:02:02.400 --> 01:02:05.440
I love how he called it the poetry of a Christian background.
01:02:05.519 --> 01:02:10.320
So now it's gonna I'm gonna start calling it the poetry of Christian mythology.
01:02:10.559 --> 01:02:22.639
And uh and and calling it poetry makes me softer, makes me less resentful of um, you know, all the the the the um I don't feel like I'm being pros.
01:02:23.119 --> 01:02:27.360
I won't, I'm hoping when I read these things I won't feel like I'm being proselytized too.
01:02:27.519 --> 01:02:34.320
You know, I'm I'm being, you know, this is they're taking poetic uh license, that's what they're doing.
01:02:34.559 --> 01:02:43.440
But um yeah, so I just yeah, thanks everybody for being here and thanks for for for the folks who shared today.
01:02:46.400 --> 01:02:48.239
Thank you so much, Margarita.
01:02:48.320 --> 01:02:49.679
I appreciate you.
01:02:50.239 --> 01:02:53.360
Next up, we have Mary C.
01:02:53.760 --> 01:02:54.320
Come on in.
01:02:54.960 --> 01:02:57.920
Yes, my name's Mary, and I'm an alcoholic.
01:02:58.079 --> 01:03:00.079
I I'm Mary's Joe.
01:03:00.719 --> 01:03:02.880
And uh um thanks.
01:03:03.039 --> 01:03:08.320
Uh this meeting, we never knew how long it would last, but it means the world to me.
01:03:08.480 --> 01:03:14.000
This is a great way to spend uh one Sunday a month, and it's an open meeting.
01:03:14.159 --> 01:03:18.079
So invite anybody here who's curious about AA.
01:03:18.639 --> 01:03:24.719
And um uh this was a uh a fascinating meeting.
01:03:24.800 --> 01:03:26.239
I I learned lots.
01:03:26.320 --> 01:03:37.440
Uh Joe, I don't know you as well as these other three guys, these guys are my guys, and um I really appreciate uh what I heard.
01:03:37.679 --> 01:03:52.400
Um, you know, it it's uh I came in like Robin did, uh young punk, and um I I had no real what what was the point in AA history, right?
01:03:52.559 --> 01:03:54.159
It was about the future of AA.
01:03:54.320 --> 01:03:56.880
What can we do to alter or improve, right?
01:03:57.039 --> 01:04:00.239
Forget about what grandpa did, right?
01:04:00.400 --> 01:04:02.239
Let's let's move forward.
01:04:02.480 --> 01:04:20.320
And uh like it wasn't until uh my group was being threatened to be kicked out of AA that I thought, I think I need to know a little about the history here because I'm talking about what AA is and what it isn't, and it's different than from what the other person is saying, what AA is and what A isn't.
01:04:20.480 --> 01:04:30.960
So I out of necessity developed uh uh a need to be as engaged with AA history as AA's future.
01:04:31.199 --> 01:04:34.239
Now I treat today as AA's history, right?
01:04:34.320 --> 01:04:35.679
This is history in the making.
01:04:35.840 --> 01:04:45.360
This meeting was history in the making, and uh we should record these as we're doing or write it down because it's gonna be important to somebody.
01:04:45.599 --> 01:04:51.840
But um thanks everybody for sharing, for helping me uh keep more of an open mind.
01:04:52.239 --> 01:05:09.760
And uh uh like uh I hope this meeting uh lasts forever because uh I think it it does a lot uh for AA as a whole, as well as uh those of us of the uh irreligious persuasion.
01:05:10.159 --> 01:05:10.800
Mary.
01:06:02.159 --> 01:06:05.519
Kenji in San Francisco, come on in.
01:06:05.920 --> 01:06:07.280
Hey everybody, Kenji.
01:06:07.440 --> 01:06:09.840
I think I'll call it human in recovery.
01:06:10.079 --> 01:06:11.840
And hey, I want to hear Mary.
01:06:12.159 --> 01:06:18.719
Mary, raise your hand again and just pass over both air buds to her, and we'll be able to hear her perfectly well.
01:06:18.960 --> 01:06:21.840
Or go on speakerphone, whatever.
01:06:22.320 --> 01:06:23.920
That's what the problem was.
01:06:26.000 --> 01:06:27.360
Wow, this meeting today.
01:06:27.519 --> 01:06:36.159
So this group, you know, I attended the first couple of meetings of this group and um the secular book study.
01:06:36.639 --> 01:06:44.960
And Stephanie was very ambitious, wanted to make it, you know, had all these great ideas for how she wanted to do it.
01:06:45.360 --> 01:06:48.000
And I had a more basic.
01:06:48.320 --> 01:06:54.079
Anyway, I had ideas about what a secular book study should be like, and it wasn't it was being done differently than that.
01:06:54.159 --> 01:07:07.440
And I guess I was being um um in a bleeding deacon and um and didn't stick around, but I'm really impressed that the meeting has lasted this long.
01:07:07.599 --> 01:07:08.400
When did it start?
01:07:08.480 --> 01:07:09.280
A couple of years ago?
01:07:09.440 --> 01:07:11.840
Was it two years ago or longer?
01:07:12.159 --> 01:07:16.159
Um, but um I've really enjoyed all the chairs four.
01:07:16.320 --> 01:07:16.719
Wow.
01:07:16.800 --> 01:07:22.079
So that so yeah, I was and it's that meant I was pretty new back then too.
01:07:22.239 --> 01:07:28.000
Um, and maybe a little, maybe my edges have sanded off a bit since then.
01:07:28.320 --> 01:07:44.960
Um, but I've really enjoyed all the chairs today a lot, and um I was thrilled to hear Tony chair, because I I know you, Tony, from you know, working with you and stuff like Zoom stuff.
01:07:45.119 --> 01:07:51.039
And um, but um I I don't think I've ever heard this.
01:07:51.199 --> 01:07:53.840
Yeah, I've never really heard you before.
01:07:53.920 --> 01:07:54.719
That was amazing.
01:07:54.880 --> 01:08:04.239
And the word from your chair, Tony, you know, really jumped out at me, which is a word that I don't think I've ever heard in an AA meeting, is you said you mentioned subservience.
01:08:04.400 --> 01:08:09.039
And I thought, wow, what an interesting way I wrote it down so I didn't forget it.
01:08:09.280 --> 01:08:25.520
Um, because so much of you know, traditional AA kind of has a that kind of a vibe, you know, do what your sponsor tells you, um, you know, bow down before, you know, the Lord in the third step.
01:08:25.840 --> 01:08:32.319
Um and um it definitely doesn't have to be that way.
01:08:32.479 --> 01:08:38.079
I mean, to me, the third step is just making the decision to deal myself in and go on with the work.
01:08:38.239 --> 01:08:44.720
And and it doesn't have to have anything to do with got believing in God at all.
01:08:44.880 --> 01:08:52.159
It's just the operative part of the big book even says it the this decision, you know, it talks about it's a decision.
01:08:52.479 --> 01:09:03.119
Um anyway, yeah, I've I've enjoyed all the chairs today, and um, and I love this group too.
01:09:03.279 --> 01:09:18.960
And I love that secular AA, we're we're laying down a record of ourselves um by, I mean, so many groups like this group, you know, records the meetings and posts them.
01:09:19.119 --> 01:09:31.119
Um, Tasnua records their speakers, and we're a small enough fellowship that sooner or later we all get asked to speak, to tell our story at a meet at a meeting where it gets recorded.
01:09:31.359 --> 01:09:37.359
And um, yeah, it's incredible how we're leaving, how we're recording a record of ourselves.
01:09:37.680 --> 01:09:40.960
Um, I don't know if anybody's actually listening to those recordings.
01:09:41.119 --> 01:09:47.119
No, I hear that people are listening, that there's actually a lot of downloads or or listens.
01:09:47.279 --> 01:09:50.880
Anyway, um thanks so much.
01:09:51.119 --> 01:09:55.680
And maybe we'll have to drop back to your group and actually check it out for myself.
01:09:55.840 --> 01:09:56.640
Thanks a lot.
01:09:57.359 --> 01:09:59.119
Oh, and uh oh, I'm thrilled.
01:09:59.199 --> 01:10:01.600
Mary is gonna be gonna hear Mary next.
01:10:01.760 --> 01:10:06.079
Also, thank you so much, Kanji.
01:10:07.119 --> 01:10:10.479
Next up, Mary's gonna come in and share with us now.
01:10:17.840 --> 01:10:19.119
Okay, thank y'all.
01:10:19.600 --> 01:10:27.439
Uh, what I was trying to say was I'm so impressed by your presentation today and how professional you are.
01:10:27.520 --> 01:10:31.359
And it looks like a secular AA TV channel, and I love that.
01:10:31.920 --> 01:10:33.520
I love that so much.
01:10:33.760 --> 01:10:38.239
And um, I'm looking forward to coming to your group now.
01:10:38.399 --> 01:10:45.840
Like I didn't even know when it was, but the funny thing was, I went to my in-person Sunday meeting today, and there was a guy there that I haven't seen in a long time.
01:10:46.000 --> 01:10:49.359
And I said, Sean, you know, what meetings are you going to online?
01:10:49.600 --> 01:10:55.840
And he said, Oh, well, I was going to the secular study group, and now they're reading uh from One Big Ten.
01:10:56.079 --> 01:10:58.319
And I was like, gosh, I hope he's here today.
01:10:58.399 --> 01:11:05.760
And I hope he knew that y'all were on board because uh he's sober and uh so you're doing good work.
01:11:05.840 --> 01:11:15.840
And I loved hearing all of your stories and your shares, so beautifully said and perfectly honest, and I'm just amazed.
01:11:16.000 --> 01:11:17.680
And so thank you for telling me when it is.
01:11:17.760 --> 01:11:18.880
I'm gonna come.
01:11:22.079 --> 01:11:25.600
Thank you for jumping back in and sharing with us, Mary.
01:11:25.760 --> 01:11:27.920
Next up we have Claudia S.
01:11:31.680 --> 01:11:34.159
Muchísimas gracias, Estefanía.
01:11:34.560 --> 01:11:37.840
Soy Claudia, soy alcohólica y el día de hoy me he bebido.
01:11:38.399 --> 01:12:04.319
Bueno, me hace muy feliz estar en la reunión donde comparte este grupo in particular, porque me ayudó a familiarizarme con la idea que ya había leído en el sitio web de Agnóstica, en la que el tema de la literatura aprobada era algo así como la Santa Inquisición, prohibiendo libros, y que no tenía sentido.
01:12:04.880 --> 01:12:18.159
But a veces estamos tan, en mi caso personal, tan adiestrados, tan dogmatizados, que nos parece implícitamente que si hacemos alguna cambio, pues estamos mal.
01:12:35.600 --> 01:13:38.800
Entré a su sitio web and vi la introducción de este taller, de este studio, and me encantó leer que decía que vamos a leer a los cofundadores, a los fundadores, a los primeros miembros, tratar de transmitir un mensaje con las herramientas que tenían in ese tiempo, con la situación, el contexto que vivían en ese momento, tratando de empatizar, and me hizo darme cuenta que la literatura original ya podía dejar de ser mi enemigo, because I sent you in occasions, ya que hay un acoso silencioso a través de la literatura no religiosa, and in my case, y me abrió un mundo en realidad, because a particular deal hizo possible that all the textbooks that compared in our group, Jim Burwell, los secularicemos.
01:13:39.920 --> 01:14:04.239
No dejamos que se pase el tema oficial, de los poderes sobrenaturales, porque queremos aprovechar allá transmitir la literatura original sin dar este personagens who are acos in their proper groups with the religiosity.
01:15:13.520 --> 01:15:16.640
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Claudia.
01:15:17.199 --> 01:15:19.520
And next, the ever grateful Jeb.
01:15:19.680 --> 01:15:20.479
Come on in.
01:15:25.279 --> 01:15:26.399
Well, thanks, Seven.
01:15:27.199 --> 01:15:38.720
Um yeah, I forgot to share something important to me is there's so much non uh non-AA owned literature that is available to us today.
01:15:38.960 --> 01:15:51.039
There's it's you know, so many groups and and meetings use still use uh uh Joe C's Beyond Belief book because it is very useful for reflection and and discussion.
01:15:51.359 --> 01:16:16.960
And then there's Bob Bob Kay's book, Bob Kennedy's, there's his uh uh uh Daily Reflections for 12-step life, and then there's uh Bill Bill W's book on the secular 12-steps, but the most recent one that I've learned about is now available on Amazon and elsewhere, I guess, which is called Take What You Can Use and Leave the Rest at the Door.
01:16:17.359 --> 01:16:36.800
And it's it is a wonderful daily reflection of reading book, which is based on first of all the conventional or traditional literature, but then the commentary for discussion that follows it is from that secular viewpoint that we share at our meetings at the secular books study meeting.
01:16:37.039 --> 01:16:44.239
So I just suggest that other people I don't have a link of that right here, but uh just check it up if you can find it.
01:16:44.319 --> 01:16:47.119
And uh yeah, what a wonderful meeting.
01:16:47.279 --> 01:16:56.239
You know, consistently, this meeting around the topic of recovery is the most positive meeting that I attend every week.
01:16:56.399 --> 01:17:04.640
I wish it were larger, it's usually maybe 20 20 people or so, but it could be 120 if people just knew about it.
01:17:04.800 --> 01:17:16.560
So it is listed on the worldwide list, the worldwide secular meeting list, and uh I suggest that to everybody so you can find the meetings that fit right for you.
01:17:16.800 --> 01:17:17.600
Thank you very much.
01:17:17.840 --> 01:17:18.479
That's all.
01:17:21.039 --> 01:17:23.279
Thank you for sharing that with us, Chab.
01:17:23.920 --> 01:17:26.399
Next up we have Stephanie.
01:17:26.479 --> 01:17:27.359
Come on in.
01:17:31.279 --> 01:17:33.359
Hi everyone, I'm Stephanie, I'm an alcoholic.
01:17:33.439 --> 01:17:34.479
Uh, good to see you today.
01:17:34.560 --> 01:17:35.600
Thanks for being here.
01:17:35.920 --> 01:17:38.479
Um yeah, thanks everyone for showing up.
01:17:38.560 --> 01:17:40.800
It's really nice to see over 60 people.
01:17:41.119 --> 01:17:44.479
Um, for me, I wasn't planning on attending the meeting.
01:17:44.560 --> 01:17:46.479
I can't remember why I got involved.
01:17:46.640 --> 01:17:49.199
I think um most of you know Heidi.
01:17:49.439 --> 01:17:56.000
I think it was either Heidi or Tony that were kind of joining um a meeting together, and I thought it might be interesting to go along.
01:17:56.239 --> 01:17:59.920
And I don't think I expected to stay as long as I have.
01:18:00.079 --> 01:18:02.399
Um, I also got thrown into service.
01:18:02.640 --> 01:18:08.800
Or, you know, I think most of us know that if you are if Tony asks you something, you probably should say yes.
01:18:08.960 --> 01:18:14.159
Um, so whether or not I was made to host because of that meeting, I it it's done wonders.
01:18:14.479 --> 01:18:24.560
Um I really learned through coming to these meetings, especially coming to book study, is that everything is open to interpretation for the individual.
01:18:24.880 --> 01:18:43.920
And to for me, I I think I was a bit closed-minded when I first came in to the, especially to the book study, not just because I mean, I don't have a belief or anything, but I thought it was just going to be a very critiquey, negative space of taking the big book and throwing it into the trash and setting it on fire.
01:18:44.000 --> 01:18:45.680
Um, and I've learned that's not the case.
01:18:45.840 --> 01:18:47.840
I've definitely learned that's not the case.
01:18:48.079 --> 01:18:56.399
Um, it was very fascinating to me going through the plain language big book because to me, I've seen it as one of the most beautiful pieces of literature.
01:18:56.560 --> 01:19:00.079
Um, just for people who, you know, English is not their first language.
01:19:00.239 --> 01:19:12.000
Uh, the intention of AA World Service is to make it accessible to people who can't tolerate, well, not even tolerate, who can't do the mental gymnastics of trying to get the old traditional language out.
01:19:12.159 --> 01:19:15.279
You know, I really liked the plain language and the aim that it served.
01:19:15.520 --> 01:19:19.840
But I realized that going to that, going to the meeting, other people had very different opinions.
01:19:19.920 --> 01:19:25.680
And it really opened my mind that it is open to my own interpretation and everyone else has their own.
01:19:25.920 --> 01:19:32.479
Um, it's been nice to hear more from attending this meeting what people relate to.
01:19:32.640 --> 01:20:00.640
You know, for some of us, like going through it, some people are really wanting to understand, you know, why AA World Service and all these meetings and all these publications have existed, like, and then going into you know what we do now and one big tent and and listening to readings from the 1970s from people, like that's been amazing to especially to hear the you know, the timeline of AA and how we've got from 1970 to 2026.
01:20:00.880 --> 01:20:04.640
Like that's been a really big mind, uh, sort of, yeah.
01:20:04.720 --> 01:20:06.800
This is what happens at seven o'clock in the morning.
01:20:07.119 --> 01:20:31.039
But I think what I've learned more about this is I don't really I've become more closer with the people that attend the meeting because I actually now understand why their motivation is to come to secular AA, not just because of the dogma and they're sick of the traditional AA dogma, but because they're curious, you know, inquisitive, they want to find their own way to make things work for them, and I'm the same.
01:20:31.119 --> 01:20:41.680
Um, I've come to realize that, you know, it's not so much that when we were doing the 12 and 12, yeah, it was kind of not my favorite, but I've I've really come to appreciate that book, for example.
01:20:41.920 --> 01:20:51.199
You know, it's just been a really kind of a shift in my mind to stay a bit more open-minded and to realize that I don't have to have it figured out.
01:20:51.279 --> 01:20:54.000
And even my own interpretation can change on the daily.
01:20:54.159 --> 01:20:57.520
Um, I think today I'm probably more um understanding.
01:20:57.600 --> 01:21:16.319
And especially it was really nice to hear from Rob in the Australian context, um, because I'm only starting to learn the New Zealand context, you know, and it's just it's nice to remind myself that yeah, the geographical regions of which people attend meetings, participate in AA is very different.
01:21:16.479 --> 01:21:21.359
Um, it took us, I think, eight months to get the plain language big book from America.
01:21:21.600 --> 01:21:36.720
Um, so you know, it's just it's just fascinating to see how this fellowship kind of works and realize that, yeah, I you know, I got sober in Canada, came back to Australia, now in New Zealand, and all three geographical locations have a big history of AA behind it, which I'm really curious about.
01:21:36.880 --> 01:21:38.640
So um it's good to see you.
01:21:38.720 --> 01:21:41.760
Um, I will say thank you so much, Robin, because you got me up as well.
01:21:42.079 --> 01:21:47.199
Wouldn't have got out of bed if it wasn't for knowing that someone else on my side of the world is going to get up at the same time.
01:21:47.359 --> 01:21:50.560
So um, and thank you, Tony, for everything that you do in the meeting.
01:21:50.720 --> 01:21:57.840
Um, Tony, I've been hosting the meeting for nearly on six months, and yeah, don't think I couldn't do it if Tony wasn't there.
01:21:57.920 --> 01:21:59.199
So I really appreciate you.
01:21:59.279 --> 01:22:00.239
And thanks for being here.
01:22:03.279 --> 01:22:06.159
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Stephanie.
01:22:06.399 --> 01:22:08.399
Next up, we have Steph.
01:22:08.560 --> 01:22:09.920
Oh, come on in.
01:22:10.239 --> 01:22:18.800
Hi, I'm Stephanie Alcoholic, and my sobriety date is November 6th, 2022.
01:22:19.520 --> 01:22:24.640
So I I went into a uh a rehab program.
01:22:24.800 --> 01:22:32.720
It was not residential because it was pandemic still, and it was through my medical uh provider.
01:22:34.079 --> 01:22:41.840
And I had been sober in the 90s for about 10 years, so this was my second go-around.
01:22:42.319 --> 01:22:45.840
And I I was 70 years old.
01:22:45.920 --> 01:22:50.720
I couldn't, I couldn't afford to uh do it again, so I had to do it right.
01:22:50.960 --> 01:23:01.600
So in that program, uh a very wise counselor suggested that I check out secular AA and secular other uh recovery meetings.
01:23:01.760 --> 01:23:04.800
And I was sort of binged at the end of December.
01:23:04.880 --> 01:23:18.239
I was binging on meetings, and one of the meetings I went to was the very first meeting of the secular big book study group, and I've been with it ever since.
01:23:19.279 --> 01:23:29.359
What I learned from my first recovery was that I needed meetings, that uh meetings are definitely part of my recovery.
01:23:29.600 --> 01:23:36.000
And I just thought, well, hell, if I'm gonna uh get involved in AA, I better read the big book.
01:23:36.159 --> 01:23:38.720
And I knew I wasn't gonna read it on my own.
01:23:39.039 --> 01:23:42.720
So what a what a boon this group was for me.
01:23:42.960 --> 01:24:05.520
And we went through it once, and we went through the 12 and 12, and then we went through the big book again, and then when we went through the plain language big book, I'm kind of big booked to death, but it was uh so important to me that I'm a little um shy about never helping other people go through it.
01:24:05.760 --> 01:24:11.119
So I don't know where we're going from here, but I'm glad to be in this community.
01:24:11.279 --> 01:24:12.479
Thanks so much.
01:24:14.720 --> 01:24:17.760
Thank you so much, Steph, for sharing with us.
01:24:18.000 --> 01:24:20.640
Next up, we have Juan Leonard.
01:24:21.840 --> 01:24:23.520
Yeah, I'm sorry, Juan.
01:24:23.600 --> 01:24:25.119
We didn't have a good enough connection.
01:24:25.199 --> 01:24:28.319
We could not hear them and him um uh today.
01:24:28.479 --> 01:24:31.600
Perhaps he can move to a different place or something.
01:24:35.039 --> 01:24:37.199
Don't see any other hands up.
01:24:39.119 --> 01:24:41.119
Margarita, I'll hand it back to you.
01:24:41.279 --> 01:24:41.920
Thank you very much.
01:24:42.239 --> 01:24:45.760
Well, does your group have this is Margarita Alcohol Free?
01:24:45.840 --> 01:24:52.159
Does your group um uh have uh uh a special way of closing?
01:24:52.800 --> 01:24:56.640
Or um do you want to do our our our song together today?
01:24:59.279 --> 01:25:04.560
Uh usually we just close with somebody reading the responsibility statement.
01:25:05.199 --> 01:25:12.880
Uh so but if you'd like to do your song, uh we could do your song.
01:25:13.359 --> 01:25:13.600
Okay.
01:25:15.359 --> 01:25:16.319
It is okay.
01:25:16.479 --> 01:25:18.239
It's a it's a very simple one.
01:25:18.399 --> 01:25:25.279
Everyone can uh unmute now and uh join in, get get ready to clap.
01:25:26.000 --> 01:25:27.439
We're not a glum lot.
01:25:28.159 --> 01:25:31.039
If you're sober and clap.
01:25:32.800 --> 01:25:33.680
If you're sober.
01:25:52.960 --> 01:25:54.079
Thank you, everyone.
