Code Blue: Dying, Grief & Finding God

WEBVTT
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.040
The ball drops.
00:00:01.199 --> 00:00:01.919
Happy New Year.
00:00:02.080 --> 00:00:03.040
So I turned to kiss her.
00:00:03.200 --> 00:00:03.839
Happy New Year.
00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:04.959
And she shakes my hand.
00:00:05.280 --> 00:00:09.839
The night before I turn I turned to her and I said, Hey, Rachel, do you think everything is gonna be alright?
00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.119
And they hit the code blue button and there's a nurse on top of her.
00:00:13.279 --> 00:00:14.480
The doctors are calling her name.
00:00:14.640 --> 00:00:17.280
Rachel, get up, get up, Rachel, Rachel, are you with me?
00:00:17.359 --> 00:00:18.079
Are you with me?
00:00:18.239 --> 00:00:24.960
And that's when I looked inside the room and I said to myself, there is not one human being that can help me.
00:00:25.199 --> 00:00:29.440
That was the time that God stopped the world for me.
00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.799
And and I walked to the front, and the pastor put the mic to my mouth and he said, Son, do you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?
00:00:37.119 --> 00:00:38.079
A lot of red flags.
00:00:42.560 --> 00:00:44.880
Welcome to Red Flags and Redemption.
00:00:45.039 --> 00:00:46.399
I'm Christine Cooper.
00:00:46.479 --> 00:00:50.399
I've been a pastor, teacher, mom of two, and today your host.
00:00:50.560 --> 00:00:56.240
This podcast is a place for honest conversations about truth, healing, and restoration.
00:00:56.560 --> 00:01:02.640
Joel 222 reminds us that God will restore the years the locusts have eaten.
00:01:02.799 --> 00:01:08.719
He is a faithful father who always brings beauty from brokenness and hope for our future.
00:01:09.040 --> 00:01:14.560
So today I'm so grateful to be in the studio with my good friend Gerald De Latour.
00:01:14.879 --> 00:01:20.640
So you are a car enthusiast, and I want you to tell us about the significance.
00:01:20.719 --> 00:01:21.840
This is a pretty cool car.
00:01:22.079 --> 00:01:23.439
Yes, that's a special car.
00:01:23.760 --> 00:01:25.280
Yeah, what's the story here?
00:01:25.599 --> 00:01:28.799
I can't believe I was able to find this car.
00:01:28.879 --> 00:01:33.439
And I thank my friend Joel because he called me and he said, Hey, I've got a special car.
00:01:33.599 --> 00:01:34.400
Come and check it out.
00:01:34.560 --> 00:01:34.719
Okay.
00:01:34.959 --> 00:01:35.920
So I went to go see it.
00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:43.359
And this is this is a called a 1988 Porsche Slant Nose.
00:01:43.519 --> 00:01:45.840
And this one is convertible.
00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.079
And uh he told me that's a special car.
00:01:48.159 --> 00:01:50.799
I didn't know really how special until later on.
00:01:51.200 --> 00:01:51.599
Cool, cool.
00:01:51.760 --> 00:01:53.920
Had you already bought it when you found out how special was?
00:01:54.400 --> 00:01:54.640
No way.
00:01:55.040 --> 00:02:03.280
I already bought it, and then I started doing the history on the car, and I found out that this is a car from the movie Pain and Gain with Mark Wahlberg and The Rock.
00:02:03.439 --> 00:02:03.840
Oh, wow.
00:02:04.159 --> 00:02:05.680
And it was filmed in Miami.
00:02:05.760 --> 00:02:10.719
So they use this vehicle for most of the filming in the in the scenes with the Porsche.
00:02:10.960 --> 00:02:12.159
So I was like, what?
00:02:12.639 --> 00:02:14.800
That's wild.
00:02:15.280 --> 00:02:17.039
So it needed some work.
00:02:17.120 --> 00:02:21.120
So I I took it all apart and I restored it myself.
00:02:21.360 --> 00:02:27.360
And I uh rebuilt the engine, the transmission, and basically made it like a brand new car.
00:02:27.680 --> 00:02:28.560
That's really cool.
00:02:28.719 --> 00:02:30.639
But you don't you you you did sell it.
00:02:30.960 --> 00:02:31.280
Yes.
00:02:31.360 --> 00:02:32.080
Yeah, I did.
00:02:32.560 --> 00:02:34.159
I'm just sad that you didn't sell it to me.
00:02:34.560 --> 00:02:35.680
Like I'm so sad.
00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:43.199
I sold it because uh a few years later, um the price of these cars went up so significantly.
00:02:43.520 --> 00:02:43.840
You had to.
00:02:44.159 --> 00:02:46.960
They became they became investment pieces now.
00:02:47.120 --> 00:02:47.439
Okay.
00:02:47.759 --> 00:02:54.240
So when someone offered me a lot, okay, it was a it was an offer you couldn't refuse.
00:02:54.479 --> 00:02:55.520
I couldn't refuse.
00:02:55.680 --> 00:02:57.680
And so right now he's a movie buff.
00:02:57.919 --> 00:03:03.120
He actually, this collector, he lives in West Palm Beach, and he owns a lot of the movie cars.
00:03:03.280 --> 00:03:08.240
So he owns the Ferrari, the actually a fake Ferrari from Risky Business.
00:03:08.400 --> 00:03:08.719
Okay.
00:03:09.280 --> 00:03:12.960
Um, no, sorry, Ferris Bueller's day off.
00:03:13.199 --> 00:03:13.520
Okay.
00:03:13.759 --> 00:03:16.719
He owns the 928 from Risky Business.
00:03:16.800 --> 00:03:19.360
That was with um what's his name?
00:03:19.520 --> 00:03:21.120
Uh I forgot his name.
00:03:21.360 --> 00:03:22.240
Tom Cruise.
00:03:22.319 --> 00:03:23.919
Yes, Tom Cruise, thank you.
00:03:24.159 --> 00:03:26.159
When he slides across with his underwear.
00:03:26.400 --> 00:03:31.039
And uh he owns the Mach 5, okay, from Speed Racer.
00:03:31.280 --> 00:03:31.599
So cool.
00:03:31.759 --> 00:03:32.800
And he owns a whole bunch of.
00:03:33.039 --> 00:03:38.560
Did you get to see all of the cars when you're he showed me he showed me his security camera from his house?
00:03:38.800 --> 00:03:40.080
Oh, very, very, very cool.
00:03:40.800 --> 00:03:42.639
He has the Batmobile and stuff like that.
00:03:42.879 --> 00:03:47.120
Well, you know, we have some big expectations knowing that you have this car now.
00:03:47.439 --> 00:03:52.560
So this is what I would say is if you buy any more of these movie cars, I want to be there when you do it.
00:03:52.719 --> 00:03:53.840
Take me along for the ride.
00:03:54.319 --> 00:04:01.520
I I do know you sometimes go to these car shows, they're always an experience, but uh, I kind of want to talk about how we know each other.
00:04:01.680 --> 00:04:03.439
So we've known each other for a while now.
00:04:03.520 --> 00:04:05.280
We figured like about 10 years.
00:04:06.240 --> 00:04:15.199
And we actually, you were at a church where I was a pastor at the time, and you were a leader, as you as you still are.
00:04:15.439 --> 00:04:25.519
But then you ended up inviting me to the church that we presently go to, and really we walked through a lot of different seasons over these past 10 years.
00:04:25.680 --> 00:04:26.079
Yes.
00:04:26.319 --> 00:04:34.240
But I wanted to give you a really special thank you because, you know, as Christ followers, we are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus.
00:04:34.399 --> 00:04:41.680
And during a really I I I live by this word that God always brings the right people to our lives.
00:04:41.920 --> 00:04:48.160
And during a really hard time in my life, I had to put a deposit down on my apartment.
00:04:48.480 --> 00:04:50.319
And I did not have it.
00:04:50.480 --> 00:04:52.000
And you ended up helping me.
00:04:52.079 --> 00:04:58.720
And I remember one first of all, thank you, because I couldn't have moved in with the kids and been there without that.
00:04:58.959 --> 00:05:01.759
But I said, Gerald, I'm gonna pay you back.
00:05:01.839 --> 00:05:03.759
I will get every penny back to you.
00:05:03.920 --> 00:05:05.439
And we had a little payment plan.
00:05:05.920 --> 00:05:11.920
And one day you went to church and you heard this message, and it was about the orphans and the widows.
00:05:12.079 --> 00:05:19.199
And the next day you called me and you just said, Christine, I don't want you to pay me anymore for this.
00:05:19.439 --> 00:05:30.240
And I remember just breaking into tears and really feeling like that is the epitome of what God wants us to look like and to emulate.
00:05:30.480 --> 00:05:33.040
And thank you for being that person.
00:05:33.199 --> 00:05:47.839
But what I would say about you, I'm sure there are thousands of stories of how you've been selfless and how you've given to others and you know, probably things that you haven't even told anybody, but you've really been the hands and feet of Jesus.
00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:48.800
So thank you for that.
00:05:49.120 --> 00:05:53.600
Wow, thank you, Christine, because uh honestly, I don't even remember that.
00:05:53.920 --> 00:05:54.399
Woo!
00:05:54.800 --> 00:05:59.920
Because uh you see the Bible says uh don't let the left hand know what the right hand is doing.
00:06:00.160 --> 00:06:02.480
And a lot of the times that's what happens.
00:06:02.639 --> 00:06:07.759
It's it's the it's the the prompting by the Holy Spirit, and um and I just obey.
00:06:08.079 --> 00:06:11.360
And and that obedience uh came by trial.
00:06:11.600 --> 00:06:21.120
It wasn't uh trust me, I didn't obey before, but uh after I went through some trials with God and and tests with God, I I started uh to obey and to learn to obey.
00:06:21.199 --> 00:06:25.600
And when he prompted me for this to happen to you, then yeah, then that's God.
00:06:25.680 --> 00:06:26.639
And God knew why.
00:06:27.279 --> 00:06:27.839
God knew why.
00:06:28.240 --> 00:06:34.079
God shows up in our in our seasons, and most of the time he uses other people to show up for us.
00:06:34.160 --> 00:06:36.560
And I I really love that, and I'm very thankful for that.
00:06:36.720 --> 00:06:38.240
But we're both 80s kids.
00:06:38.399 --> 00:06:49.680
Yes, we are, and uh I we were talking about when we realized that breakdancing was a thing, like what grades we were in, the parachute pants for all the 80s kids out there.
00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:52.639
But you you have a little history.
00:06:52.879 --> 00:07:02.720
I know you grew up and you were like a party boy, yes, and you somewhere along the way you found the love of your life.
00:07:02.879 --> 00:07:04.399
So kind of tell us about that.
00:07:04.720 --> 00:07:05.600
Well, uh, yes.
00:07:05.680 --> 00:07:08.319
Uh I was a breakdancer, popper, rocker, and all that.
00:07:08.480 --> 00:07:10.560
Love the 80s music, freestyle music.
00:07:10.720 --> 00:07:13.600
In fact, driving up here, I was listening to Freestyle.
00:07:13.680 --> 00:07:14.639
I love freestyle music.
00:07:14.959 --> 00:07:15.920
I love that time.
00:07:16.079 --> 00:07:18.399
Um best genre of music.
00:07:19.360 --> 00:07:19.439
Yes.
00:07:19.680 --> 00:07:25.519
Lizette Melendez, George Lamont, Danny O, all those guys, you know, cover girls.
00:07:25.759 --> 00:07:31.600
And it's it's uh it's it's it's a great time, and we didn't have phones, you know.
00:07:32.079 --> 00:07:36.079
Yeah, and that was nobody could take pictures of what happened back then.
00:07:37.680 --> 00:07:50.560
So again, um I was part of a crew and we were called TDK, the Divine Knights, and we and we used to break dance all around uh Queens and Manhattan and Brooklyn and stuff like that.
00:07:50.720 --> 00:07:51.839
And I I love to dance.
00:07:51.920 --> 00:07:54.480
I've been dancing since I was a child, and I love to dance.
00:07:54.639 --> 00:07:56.560
I learned all the steps that we needed to do.
00:07:56.720 --> 00:08:00.480
And especially I liked I liked what the girls liked.
00:08:00.959 --> 00:08:10.160
And I was a bad boy back then, and um it's it was I was a bad boy.
00:08:10.240 --> 00:08:11.360
I can just say is I was a bad boy.
00:08:11.839 --> 00:08:18.079
You're uh a little bit of a player, yes, yes, and uh you're definitely living that kind of pop cult culture, yeah.
00:08:18.639 --> 00:08:22.399
And I let the girls hear what they wanted to hear so I can get what I wanted to get.
00:08:22.480 --> 00:08:23.439
Well, if you get my meaning.
00:08:23.759 --> 00:08:24.800
Sounds like Miami.
00:08:24.959 --> 00:08:26.319
Yes, but today.
00:08:26.639 --> 00:08:32.399
And um so, but uh God came later on and showed me some things about that.
00:08:32.799 --> 00:08:33.440
Yeah, yeah.
00:08:33.600 --> 00:08:34.080
Yeah.
00:08:34.399 --> 00:08:38.240
And through through that, though, how'd you end up meeting the love of your life?
00:08:38.559 --> 00:08:42.000
Oh, that's a that's a how how yeah, tell us that story.
00:08:42.240 --> 00:08:43.600
So that story happened.
00:08:43.679 --> 00:08:45.919
Um, I was living already in Miami.
00:08:46.080 --> 00:08:49.200
I came down here, uh, I bought a house already.
00:08:49.360 --> 00:08:53.120
I was uh 22.
00:08:53.600 --> 00:08:55.360
So I bought a house down here already.
00:08:55.440 --> 00:08:59.519
I was already living down here, and my mother got cancer.
00:09:00.879 --> 00:09:06.879
So I no one wanted to tell me that she had cancer because they knew that I would get upset and I would fly right back to New York.
00:09:07.039 --> 00:09:07.279
Yeah.
00:09:07.440 --> 00:09:10.879
And I found out from my cousin who accidentally said, Hey man, I'm sorry to hear about your mom.
00:09:11.120 --> 00:09:12.399
Like, what's wrong with my mom?
00:09:12.480 --> 00:09:12.720
Wow.
00:09:12.879 --> 00:09:14.240
And he told me, and I said, What?
00:09:14.399 --> 00:09:21.200
And then the next day I packed up and I got and I drove back to New York, and I got to New York then in 24 hours.
00:09:21.759 --> 00:09:26.240
And I nonstoped and I got back to New York, and uh it was her last days.
00:09:26.480 --> 00:09:27.440
No way, yeah.
00:09:27.519 --> 00:09:36.000
It was her last days, and I was so upset, and no one told me, and and uh she passed away, and I was very hurt.
00:09:36.240 --> 00:09:42.720
And at that time, that's when I turned to God because my mother was a very religious person.
00:09:42.879 --> 00:09:44.320
She was a devout Catholic.
00:09:44.399 --> 00:09:52.960
Okay, and she gave, my mother gave and gave and gave, and uh she helped people, people had nothing.
00:09:53.200 --> 00:10:02.720
In fact, our home was used as a transition space where people would come from Haiti and they would live there for a while, get their foot wet, get their jobs, get their careers.
00:10:03.120 --> 00:10:08.480
She was a real woman of God, and then they would and they would save their money and then so they can get their own place and then they would move out.
00:10:08.559 --> 00:10:08.720
Okay.
00:10:08.879 --> 00:10:14.000
So we live in a brownstone, so it was three, three or four families in that in that house.
00:10:14.320 --> 00:10:17.519
So um, I was so upset with God.
00:10:17.679 --> 00:10:19.840
I said, How could you let this woman die?
00:10:20.080 --> 00:10:23.200
And I said, You know, I don't want nothing from you.
00:10:23.440 --> 00:10:25.279
I don't want to know you because you're not real.
00:10:25.440 --> 00:10:30.320
Because how could this woman die, you let this woman die and you let other people live?
00:10:30.720 --> 00:10:31.759
And that's when I walked around.
00:10:32.080 --> 00:10:47.360
I've heard people say that, like, why do the bad people that are doing all the bad things, they get to go on about their business, but then somebody who was really a saint and a beautiful woman of God, you know, she was taken from you, and it's hard to understand.
00:10:47.519 --> 00:10:51.519
So you find during that time you decide to turn your back on God.
00:10:51.679 --> 00:10:52.879
Yep, I turned my back on God.
00:10:52.960 --> 00:10:54.799
I didn't want anything to do with him anymore.
00:10:54.960 --> 00:10:59.759
Especially I grew up Catholic, so I was an altar boy, and I got to see, you know, the thinging ling.
00:10:59.919 --> 00:11:02.480
I got to see the what goes on in the back.
00:11:02.879 --> 00:11:05.759
And I said, This is a lie, this is a game, this is a racket.
00:11:06.080 --> 00:11:13.759
And I even then when this happened, even it made it more so that I didn't believe in anything a lot of red flags, I think.
00:11:13.919 --> 00:11:15.759
Yes, a lot of red flags.
00:11:16.080 --> 00:11:25.759
And so about a year later, uh a friend of mine calls me up and says, Hey Gerald, we're we're having our our our end of summer party.
00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:26.879
Can you come?
00:11:27.120 --> 00:11:32.240
I said, Oh, well, you know, he says, Come on, Gerald, yet nobody's seen you around since your mother passed away.
00:11:32.399 --> 00:11:33.279
Why don't you come?
00:11:33.440 --> 00:11:34.320
Just be there.
00:11:34.559 --> 00:11:35.840
So I said, okay.
00:11:36.159 --> 00:11:43.039
So I get my cousin, he was from Miami, he comes with me, and we and we get my car nice and washed and polished and everything, and get dressed up.
00:11:43.120 --> 00:11:46.559
We're wearing, I was wearing Karavichi jeans, capri shoes.
00:11:46.639 --> 00:11:52.240
I don't know if you remember those, okay, and and the silk shirts, okay, looking like, oh, like Miami Vice.
00:11:53.039 --> 00:11:54.720
And uh, so we go to the party.
00:11:55.120 --> 00:11:56.000
And this is in Miami.
00:11:56.159 --> 00:11:56.960
No, this is in New York.
00:11:57.039 --> 00:11:57.679
Oh, in New York, okay.
00:11:57.919 --> 00:11:58.159
New York.
00:11:58.240 --> 00:11:59.679
I'm I'm in New York now.
00:12:00.080 --> 00:12:07.279
And um, so we get to the party, and as soon as I open up the gate to go through, I see this woman.
00:12:08.320 --> 00:12:13.759
Mind you, I was only gonna stay at this party for a little bit because I had dates already in Manhattan.
00:12:14.240 --> 00:12:18.480
So I see this woman and she's dancing, and I'm and I and I hit my cousin.
00:12:18.639 --> 00:12:21.120
I said, Hey, you see that woman right there?
00:12:21.279 --> 00:12:22.320
I'm gonna marry her.
00:12:22.559 --> 00:12:25.039
And my cousin's like, yeah, all right, you love it.
00:12:25.200 --> 00:12:27.120
You say that all the time, you say that all the time.
00:12:27.200 --> 00:12:28.960
We got these girls waiting for us in Manhattan.
00:12:29.120 --> 00:12:30.000
So what are you talking about?
00:12:30.159 --> 00:12:31.600
I said, No, she's special.
00:12:31.759 --> 00:12:34.000
So I said, let's stay for a little bit, let's stay for a little bit.
00:12:34.080 --> 00:12:36.559
So I gotta, I gotta, I gotta find out who this is.
00:12:36.720 --> 00:12:37.039
Yeah.
00:12:37.200 --> 00:12:38.639
So I start dancing, right?
00:12:38.720 --> 00:12:40.240
And I noticed that she's looking at my steps.
00:12:40.559 --> 00:12:41.600
I said, okay, I'm gonna show off.
00:12:41.679 --> 00:12:43.200
I'm gonna start doing some crazy steps.
00:12:43.440 --> 00:12:46.480
And she tries to copy me, and I see that she she trips up her feet.
00:12:46.639 --> 00:12:48.879
I said, Oh, I got that, I got that.
00:12:49.039 --> 00:12:51.120
And uh, she's dancing with this guy.
00:12:51.279 --> 00:12:52.799
So I said, all right, let me wait.
00:12:52.879 --> 00:12:59.840
So she I wait till she the guy leaves to go get her something, and I come and I slide over there to her and I said, Hey, I noticed that you're looking at my steps.
00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:00.639
Do you like to dance?
00:13:00.720 --> 00:13:01.840
She goes, Yeah, I like to dance.
00:13:02.080 --> 00:13:04.879
I said, Well, do you do you do you do you I know you?
00:13:04.960 --> 00:13:06.159
Because you look very familiar.
00:13:06.320 --> 00:13:07.919
And I was just saying, I like that line.
00:13:08.080 --> 00:13:08.720
I like that line.
00:13:09.039 --> 00:13:09.679
But it was actually true.
00:13:09.759 --> 00:13:10.879
She goes, You don't remember me?
00:13:10.960 --> 00:13:12.000
I said, No.
00:13:12.159 --> 00:13:13.600
She says, I'm Rachel.
00:13:13.919 --> 00:13:16.399
You used to bother me when we were about 12 years old.
00:13:16.480 --> 00:13:16.720
Oh, okay.
00:13:16.799 --> 00:13:19.120
And you said, you know, pull my hair and everything else like that.
00:13:19.279 --> 00:13:19.919
I said, Really?
00:13:20.080 --> 00:13:21.600
Well, Rachel, you look good.
00:13:21.679 --> 00:13:25.120
Now, I will not pull your hair, I will caress your hair.
00:13:25.360 --> 00:13:28.559
And she was like, Oh, you got you got a lot of lines, huh?
00:13:28.720 --> 00:13:32.559
And uh, so we started dancing some more, and I she says, Oh, you're a good dancer.
00:13:32.720 --> 00:13:33.600
I said, Well, thanks.
00:13:33.679 --> 00:13:42.000
You know, um, listen, I have an appointment in Manhattan, and I'm not gonna stay very uh I'm gonna I'm not gonna stay very long, but can I get your number?
00:13:42.159 --> 00:13:43.279
And she was like, No.
00:13:43.519 --> 00:13:44.720
I said, Come on, Rachel.
00:13:44.799 --> 00:13:45.919
You said you know me, right?
00:13:46.000 --> 00:13:46.399
You know me.
00:13:46.480 --> 00:13:47.200
Can I get your number?
00:13:47.360 --> 00:13:48.000
She goes, you know what?
00:13:48.080 --> 00:13:49.600
I also heard about you.
00:13:49.919 --> 00:13:50.960
You're that guy.
00:13:51.200 --> 00:13:56.159
You're that guy that I give you my number, we go out, and you and you get what you want and you're out.
00:13:56.320 --> 00:13:57.679
I said, No, no, no, no.
00:13:57.759 --> 00:13:58.639
You're special.
00:13:58.960 --> 00:14:00.559
You are special.
00:14:00.879 --> 00:14:12.000
And um for about 15 minutes of me begging, okay, she finally gave me her phone number and she wrote it on the back of the Florida Lotto card that I had.
00:14:12.240 --> 00:14:13.840
I still have that card to this day.
00:14:14.000 --> 00:14:14.639
No way.
00:14:14.799 --> 00:14:17.679
And she wrote her phone number down and I left.
00:14:17.759 --> 00:14:18.639
I said, okay, I see you.
00:14:18.720 --> 00:14:19.039
And I left.
00:14:19.120 --> 00:14:21.039
I went to Manhattan, but guess what?
00:14:21.360 --> 00:14:22.879
I never called her.
00:14:23.200 --> 00:14:24.159
I never called her.
00:14:24.320 --> 00:14:29.360
I did one of those stupid things, you know, that guys do, because back then we had this thing, you know, we don't call for like two weeks.
00:14:29.840 --> 00:14:31.759
So that should be like some tension.
00:14:31.919 --> 00:14:35.759
Yeah, yes, you know, and hard to get, hard to get, all that.
00:14:36.080 --> 00:14:41.919
So that happened, and uh she next thing I know, she's coming to my house.
00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:49.360
I just I'm walking back from playing handball all day, and I see her driving up with my cousin, and they're coming to visit my house.
00:14:49.519 --> 00:14:50.799
I was like, oh, okay.
00:14:50.879 --> 00:14:55.039
I'm all stinky, sweaty, and nasty and everything, playing games all day.
00:14:55.279 --> 00:14:57.519
And she comes up and I say, Hey, what's up, Rachel?
00:14:57.600 --> 00:14:58.240
How you doing?
00:14:58.399 --> 00:14:58.960
Like that.
00:14:59.120 --> 00:15:01.679
And she's like, Yeah, you didn't call me.
00:15:01.919 --> 00:15:03.440
I said, Yeah, you know how it is.
00:15:03.519 --> 00:15:06.639
I'm busy, I got things to do, making things happen.
00:15:06.960 --> 00:15:13.200
And uh she says, Well, I just wanted to say, stop by and say hi and uh see if we want to hang out.
00:15:13.360 --> 00:15:15.360
I was like, Oh, okay, I like that.
00:15:15.440 --> 00:15:17.200
You know, she's aggressive, okay.
00:15:17.840 --> 00:15:25.039
And uh, and so yeah, so we we we went, uh I said, Look, my friend owns a club, and uh, I'm one of his promoters.
00:15:25.200 --> 00:15:26.159
I'll pick you up.
00:15:26.320 --> 00:15:29.519
And she goes, No, you don't pick me up, I'll meet you there.
00:15:29.840 --> 00:15:33.360
So, so she she so we meet over there.
00:15:33.519 --> 00:15:36.720
So at the same time I called, I invited other friends to come.
00:15:37.279 --> 00:15:42.320
So I get over there and stuff like that, and we where she comes in and but she's with a guy.
00:15:42.480 --> 00:15:45.039
I'm like, oh, she's with a guy.
00:15:45.360 --> 00:15:47.519
Okay, okay, no problem.
00:15:47.840 --> 00:15:52.480
So my cousin is there with and another friend of mine is there.
00:15:52.639 --> 00:15:59.120
These two, they're two beautiful women, tall, you know, 5'11, beautiful.
00:15:59.279 --> 00:16:01.679
One is blonde and the other one's a redhead.
00:16:02.240 --> 00:16:05.440
Okay, so I say, hey, do me a favor.
00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:09.519
Why don't you go over there at that table and sit with me?
00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:10.320
Okay.
00:16:10.879 --> 00:16:14.879
So we go over there and sit with at the table, and I and of course, these girls are knockouts.
00:16:15.200 --> 00:16:18.320
And this guy that she's with is looking at him like that's them like this.
00:16:18.480 --> 00:16:21.200
Oh, like he can't keep his eyes off of him.
00:16:21.360 --> 00:16:22.720
I said, Okay, I got this, I got this.
00:16:22.799 --> 00:16:25.679
I go, hey, uh, why don't you dance with my cousin?
00:16:25.919 --> 00:16:27.200
He went, oh, okay.
00:16:27.600 --> 00:16:31.200
He got up so fast and left, and he left Rachel.
00:16:31.360 --> 00:16:34.399
So I said, Oh, this guy is with you, huh?
00:16:34.799 --> 00:16:35.919
That's so funny.
00:16:36.159 --> 00:16:37.039
I love it.
00:16:37.279 --> 00:16:43.600
And um, so I sat down with her and we started talking, and then I said, Hey, let's go, let's dance.
00:16:43.679 --> 00:16:45.519
So we danced a few times and stuff like that.
00:16:45.679 --> 00:16:51.679
So we did that a couple of times, and the next date, that was that was September.
00:16:51.919 --> 00:16:54.480
The next date was October.
00:16:54.960 --> 00:17:00.080
I invited her to uh to a uh costume party for Halloween.
00:17:00.480 --> 00:17:03.519
So I said, Hey, I'm gonna pick you up, let's go get you know get some costumes.
00:17:03.759 --> 00:17:04.880
So I went to pick her up.
00:17:04.960 --> 00:17:09.680
She she decided on a sexy pirate, and I was a clown.
00:17:09.920 --> 00:17:12.240
So I had all the makeup on and everything like that.
00:17:12.319 --> 00:17:14.559
So we we go to my friend's party.
00:17:15.039 --> 00:17:18.400
So I was looking at her and I said, wait a second, this girl is too sexy.
00:17:19.119 --> 00:17:28.240
So I get I got all the guys in the room that were there, and I put them, I and I walked them all into the back room, and I said, Look, I don't want none of you guys dancing with her.
00:17:29.039 --> 00:17:31.839
And they're like, Okay, all right, no problem.
00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:35.200
Only person that can dance with her is Abuelo, the grandfather.
00:17:35.759 --> 00:17:40.160
And so that whole night she was like, you know, dancing around, but everybody's turning around.
00:17:40.799 --> 00:17:41.440
So funny.
00:17:41.599 --> 00:17:46.480
And it wasn't until like three years after we were married, I told her the truth.
00:17:46.720 --> 00:17:48.880
No, like nobody was dancing with me.
00:17:49.039 --> 00:17:50.880
Yeah, because she always asked me, God, I don't believe it.
00:17:50.960 --> 00:17:51.599
I look so good.
00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:53.680
Yeah, nobody was dancing with me.
00:17:54.640 --> 00:18:03.440
So uh we had an argument, and I said, Look, uh, you're playing games, I'm playing games, so let's not continue dating each other anymore.
00:18:03.519 --> 00:18:06.079
So, because I was interested in somebody else.
00:18:06.400 --> 00:18:14.240
And we stopped, and then uh in the in November in December, I get a phone call from her, and she's like, Hey, how you doing?
00:18:14.319 --> 00:18:15.279
I was thinking about you.
00:18:15.440 --> 00:18:18.480
My mom was asking, she hasn't seen you around.
00:18:18.720 --> 00:18:19.839
I said, Oh, okay, nice.
00:18:20.079 --> 00:18:21.920
Tell your mom I said hi and stuff.
00:18:22.160 --> 00:18:26.319
And um she says, What are you doing for New Year's Eve?
00:18:27.039 --> 00:18:30.880
And I said, Nothing.
00:18:31.119 --> 00:18:33.519
I already had a date, and I said, Nothing.
00:18:33.599 --> 00:18:36.240
She says, Well, would you like to be with me for New Year's Eve?
00:18:38.079 --> 00:18:41.440
Oh, okay, okay, I'll go out with you for New Year's Eve.
00:18:41.680 --> 00:18:43.359
So canceled the other day.
00:18:43.599 --> 00:18:45.839
I went to go pick her up, December 31st.
00:18:46.079 --> 00:18:56.559
So I'm expecting, you know, sexy mama coming out of the door, and this girl wore a jumpsuit from here to there, and everything covered.
00:18:56.640 --> 00:18:57.920
I seen no skin.
00:18:58.079 --> 00:19:02.079
And I was like, this is gonna be a crazy night.
00:19:02.400 --> 00:19:05.440
So I went to go kiss her hello, and she shakes my hand.
00:19:05.680 --> 00:19:06.319
I said, okay.
00:19:06.559 --> 00:19:07.759
She got her in a car.
00:19:08.079 --> 00:19:11.759
We go to the place, we have a good time, the ball drops.
00:19:11.920 --> 00:19:12.640
Happy New Year.
00:19:12.799 --> 00:19:14.799
So I turned to kiss her, happy new year.
00:19:15.039 --> 00:19:16.400
And she shakes my hand.
00:19:16.559 --> 00:19:20.640
I was like, oh boy, I am dropping this girl home at 12:30.
00:19:20.720 --> 00:19:21.200
I am out of here.
00:19:21.279 --> 00:19:22.640
I'm gonna go to Manhattan.
00:19:22.880 --> 00:19:28.880
And uh, so I said, uh, so hey, it's before traffic gets crazy and the drunks get out there, let's I'm gonna drive you home.
00:19:29.279 --> 00:19:30.480
So I drive her home.
00:19:30.640 --> 00:19:31.759
I park in front of her house.
00:19:31.839 --> 00:19:35.279
I say, okay, Rachel, uh, nice having a good time with you and everything like that.
00:19:35.359 --> 00:19:36.880
So I went to go shake her hand.
00:19:37.119 --> 00:19:39.200
And she says, You know what?
00:19:39.839 --> 00:19:41.279
You were a gentleman tonight.
00:19:41.839 --> 00:19:46.880
I was testing you to see if you're gonna complain the way I look and all this and this.
00:19:47.359 --> 00:19:48.559
And you were a gentleman.
00:19:48.880 --> 00:19:51.759
So she jumps over my council on my car.
00:19:51.920 --> 00:19:53.599
I was driving a transam at the time.
00:19:53.839 --> 00:19:58.720
She jumps over my council and she says to me, You just this is your kiss.
00:19:59.279 --> 00:20:07.200
And she gets on my lap, she sits on my lap, and we kiss until from one o'clock in the morning to six o'clock in the morning.
00:20:07.519 --> 00:20:07.839
Wow.
00:20:08.480 --> 00:20:12.799
And that was the beginning of our relationship January 1st.
00:20:13.119 --> 00:20:13.519
Wow.
00:20:13.839 --> 00:20:16.480
And so we got married September.
00:20:18.160 --> 00:20:20.720
So January, and you got married the following September.
00:20:20.880 --> 00:20:21.920
So how old are you?
00:20:22.240 --> 00:20:22.799
At that time?
00:20:22.960 --> 00:20:23.200
Uh-huh.
00:20:23.359 --> 00:20:24.079
I was 24.
00:20:24.400 --> 00:20:24.640
Okay.
00:20:24.880 --> 00:20:32.640
And we got married, and I said, and uh, I moved to Miami the next year, February, 92.
00:20:33.519 --> 00:20:36.640
And that's how everything started, and that's how I got back to Miami.
00:20:36.720 --> 00:20:47.920
And um we had uh one child five years later, which is and then another child, and then and then uh then years passed, and she was getting nervous.
00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:49.759
She thought something was wrong with her, so she went to the house.
00:20:50.079 --> 00:20:50.720
To have another child.
00:20:50.960 --> 00:20:51.680
To have another child.
00:20:51.839 --> 00:20:52.160
Okay.
00:20:52.559 --> 00:20:57.359
And she made me go take tests to see if anything was wrong with me, but we were fine.
00:20:58.240 --> 00:21:00.640
Now I look back, I know it was God.
00:21:00.799 --> 00:21:01.359
Yeah, yeah.
00:21:01.759 --> 00:21:05.279
And so we finally we finally get pregnant.
00:21:05.359 --> 00:21:05.759
Yeah.
00:21:05.920 --> 00:21:07.279
And it was a big baby.
00:21:07.759 --> 00:21:10.720
And so through through all this, she's the love of your life.
00:21:10.799 --> 00:21:11.119
Oh, yes.
00:21:11.440 --> 00:21:12.720
You guys are building a family.
00:21:12.880 --> 00:21:17.200
Yeah, you really have you feel like you found happiness.
00:21:17.519 --> 00:21:21.119
You are happy about everything that's happening in your life.
00:21:21.279 --> 00:21:21.519
Yep.
00:21:21.759 --> 00:21:24.640
And then she had a desire to have this third baby.
00:21:24.960 --> 00:21:26.319
She couldn't get pregnant.
00:21:26.480 --> 00:21:29.759
She finally gets pregnant, and then the baby was really big.
00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:30.319
Yeah.
00:21:30.799 --> 00:21:32.160
And so what happens?
00:21:32.720 --> 00:21:36.799
Um, around so the baby was really big, so she couldn't have in our normal pregnancy.
00:21:36.880 --> 00:21:37.759
She had to be a C-section.
00:21:37.920 --> 00:21:42.640
So we had a planned C-section, and everything was everything was uh set up.
00:21:42.960 --> 00:21:43.279
Okay.
00:21:43.839 --> 00:21:50.240
And I remember the night before, the week before, I I I had lots of m headaches, migraines.
00:21:50.319 --> 00:21:51.440
I don't suffer from headache at all.
00:21:51.680 --> 00:21:51.920
Interesting.
00:21:52.160 --> 00:21:52.400
Ever.
00:21:52.640 --> 00:21:54.000
And I had a whole bunch of headaches.
00:21:54.079 --> 00:21:54.799
I wasn't feeling right.
00:21:54.880 --> 00:21:55.680
I thought I was gonna die.
00:21:55.759 --> 00:21:57.200
I was having like a panic attacks.
00:21:57.599 --> 00:21:58.640
Never suffered from that.
00:21:59.519 --> 00:22:04.079
And And I went to see her doctors and they uh they're like, Hey, you're fine, everything's fine.
00:22:06.799 --> 00:22:14.720
So the night before the planned uh pregnancy, the night before I told I turned to her and I said, Hey, Rachel, do you think everything is gonna be all right?
00:22:14.960 --> 00:22:19.920
She said, Ah, don't worry, everything's gonna be fine, everything's gonna be all right, don't worry, don't worry.
00:22:20.240 --> 00:22:23.359
Okay, so when the next day we went to have the baby.
00:22:23.599 --> 00:22:28.480
Um, we had the baby, baby came out healthy, everything like that.
00:22:28.720 --> 00:22:38.079
She held her daughter, and um two hours later, I found her dead.
00:22:39.599 --> 00:22:41.200
And what had happened?
00:22:43.039 --> 00:22:48.720
I remember because she at that time they were kidnapping babies at that time, and back in in the in those times.
00:22:48.960 --> 00:22:51.039
And so she asked me to go watch the baby, follow the baby.
00:22:51.920 --> 00:22:58.480
Yes, and so I went to with the baby and I went back to the room and I saw her sleeping there.
00:22:58.880 --> 00:23:05.200
I thought she was sleeping, so I sat down, but then I I looked across the room and I saw that the sheets weren't going up and down.
00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:11.440
So I get up and I'm looking and I'm saying, God, no, not again.
00:23:11.759 --> 00:23:14.400
And I go to the bed and I kiss her.
00:23:14.559 --> 00:23:16.240
Her lips are ice cold.
00:23:16.480 --> 00:23:21.599
So I run out of the room, I call the nurses, and I said, My my wife's lips are ice cold.
00:23:21.680 --> 00:23:22.480
They're blue.
00:23:22.640 --> 00:23:29.680
And they hit the code blue button, they rush the trauma kid in there, they push me to the side, and they're doing the whole thing that they're doing.
00:23:29.920 --> 00:23:36.559
Okay, and uh there's a nurse on top of her, the doctors are calling her name, Rachel, get up, get up, Rachel, Rachel, are you with me?
00:23:36.640 --> 00:23:37.279
Are you with me?
00:23:37.440 --> 00:23:40.720
And they're doing the paddle and they push me out of the room.
00:23:40.960 --> 00:23:48.240
And that's when I looked inside the room and I said to myself, there is not one human being that can help me.
00:23:48.640 --> 00:23:54.880
And when I said that, I looked to the right, and there was the chapel.
00:23:56.160 --> 00:24:10.160
I walked over there, opened the door, and there was stained glass and a cross, and I laid down in front of the cross, and I said, God, if you're real, I need you.
00:24:10.960 --> 00:24:12.720
Let me tell you something, Christine.
00:24:12.960 --> 00:24:24.319
That was the time looking back that God stopped the world for me and said to him, to me that I'm gonna be here with you.
00:24:24.799 --> 00:24:26.319
Did the situation change?
00:24:26.559 --> 00:24:35.359
No, the situation didn't change, but that's when God started working with me and me coming to him.
00:24:35.680 --> 00:24:47.119
Yeah, and that's was the pivotal point in my life where I came to Christ and um she died for about 20 over, they determined like 20 over 20 minutes.
00:24:47.279 --> 00:24:49.599
Okay, so she her brain was all messed up.
00:24:51.359 --> 00:24:53.200
I could not let her go.
00:24:54.000 --> 00:24:55.119
I could not let her go.
00:24:55.440 --> 00:24:56.240
How old was she?
00:24:56.960 --> 00:24:57.759
36.
00:24:58.559 --> 00:24:59.759
We're both 36.
00:25:00.319 --> 00:25:01.920
I could not let her go.
00:25:02.240 --> 00:25:04.160
And they said, no, Gerald, you gotta let her go.
00:25:04.240 --> 00:25:04.880
I said, I can't.
00:25:05.119 --> 00:25:05.680
I can't.
00:25:05.920 --> 00:25:06.880
I can't let her go.
00:25:07.039 --> 00:25:13.119
So long story short, after the insurance, you know, goes crazy, they had to take her out.
00:25:13.440 --> 00:25:19.359
So they moved her to a facility down south, and nothing changed.
00:25:19.680 --> 00:25:28.880
And I was still working, so now I had a five-year-old, four-year-old, and a newborn, plus in-laws.
00:25:29.359 --> 00:25:31.680
They were there, her parents, to help.
00:25:31.759 --> 00:25:33.440
And they were they were awesome.
00:25:33.599 --> 00:25:37.839
But we were all grieving, we're doing the same thing and taking care of kids, but we're grieving at the same time.
00:25:38.000 --> 00:25:38.640
Right, right.
00:25:38.880 --> 00:25:40.799
That was the crazy part about it.
00:25:41.519 --> 00:25:43.359
And I didn't know what to do.
00:25:43.680 --> 00:25:49.839
And one day, instead of making the right turn to go on the turnpike, I made a left.
00:25:50.160 --> 00:25:53.759
And I ended up in a church parking lot, and I'm crying in my car.
00:25:54.160 --> 00:25:56.079
I don't know why what I'm doing there.
00:25:56.319 --> 00:25:58.799
And I get up, I'm like, what are you doing?
00:25:58.960 --> 00:26:00.079
I'm talking to myself.
00:26:00.240 --> 00:26:03.759
I open the door and I'm going to the door of the church.
00:26:04.319 --> 00:26:06.559
I'm greeted at the at the door.
00:26:07.680 --> 00:26:09.200
They put me down to sit down.
00:26:09.279 --> 00:26:16.480
And just when I sit down is when the pastor says, Is there anyone here who wants to accept Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior?
00:26:17.519 --> 00:26:19.200
I see my body getting up.
00:26:19.279 --> 00:26:20.880
I'm telling myself, sit down.
00:26:22.240 --> 00:26:23.680
God, it was the Holy Spirit.
00:26:23.839 --> 00:26:24.640
He took hold.
00:26:24.880 --> 00:26:25.279
Yes.
00:26:25.440 --> 00:26:32.559
And and I walked to the front, and the pastor put the mic to my mouth and he said, Son, do you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?
00:26:32.960 --> 00:26:34.720
And I said, Yes, I do.
00:26:35.440 --> 00:26:38.079
And that's when everything changed.
00:26:38.319 --> 00:26:39.519
Thank you, Jesus.
00:26:39.759 --> 00:26:40.720
Everything changed.
00:26:41.039 --> 00:26:44.880
Situation didn't change, but I started changing.
00:26:45.119 --> 00:26:46.559
And here's the crazy thing.
00:26:46.720 --> 00:26:50.319
Right after this happened, after you know, they do the meet and greet, you know, it was a Baptist church.
00:26:50.400 --> 00:26:51.759
So Baptist people, they eat.
00:26:51.920 --> 00:26:54.000
Okay, there's always food after church.
00:26:54.240 --> 00:27:01.359
So after we're talking and eating and everything else, you know, all the all the pastries and all that stuff and bagels.
00:27:01.759 --> 00:27:07.119
And um, I go home and something hits me.
00:27:07.599 --> 00:27:13.440
I start pulling out books because I used to believe that we came from UFOs.
00:27:13.759 --> 00:27:14.400
Isn't that crazy?
00:27:14.720 --> 00:27:16.079
Today that's what we were talking about.
00:27:16.240 --> 00:27:19.359
And I used to believe that we were seated, we came from UFOs, you know.
00:27:19.519 --> 00:27:21.519
And uh I had all those kind of books.
00:27:21.599 --> 00:27:26.960
I had I had books on um a sorcery, I had all this witchcraft.
00:27:27.359 --> 00:27:32.000
It really opened up a lot of doors in your life to many different philosophies.
00:27:32.319 --> 00:27:35.759
Do you believe that this was because you were searching?
00:27:36.000 --> 00:27:36.640
Yeah.
00:27:36.880 --> 00:27:39.279
Both of us, my wife and I, because we were both doing it together.
00:27:40.160 --> 00:27:41.599
And so I took all those books down.
00:27:41.680 --> 00:27:42.720
I took all those books down.
00:27:42.880 --> 00:27:47.680
I took, you know, marital AIDS, you know, those back then it was VHS tapes.
00:27:48.319 --> 00:27:55.279
Today there's DVDs, but marital AIDS threw those, took them apart, threw them apart, and I'm putting them in the garbage.
00:27:55.440 --> 00:28:00.640
I used to uh I don't think I can say this on tape.
00:28:00.880 --> 00:28:01.680
I don't say that.
00:28:01.839 --> 00:28:03.279
I used to be a bad boy.
00:28:03.440 --> 00:28:08.880
Okay, so I had some stuff, okay, and I took a hammer to it and I destroyed it.
00:28:09.119 --> 00:28:10.880
Okay, and I destroyed it.
00:28:11.279 --> 00:28:16.240
So you're just cleaning out all of it, and anything that was against God.
00:28:16.400 --> 00:28:18.000
And we and I didn't know what I was doing.
00:28:18.240 --> 00:28:22.880
We were just talking about this, that there are things that can come up and they can be idols in our life.
00:28:22.960 --> 00:28:23.359
Yes.
00:28:23.599 --> 00:28:30.079
They actually maybe it's an idol of pleasure, and that's you know, that that might have been an idol of pleasure.
00:28:30.480 --> 00:28:33.200
It's an idol of identity.
00:28:33.359 --> 00:28:38.799
You know, there were it sounds like we're so many different idols in your life, and you'd opened yourself up.
00:28:38.960 --> 00:28:47.359
And the truth is, there's so many spiritual things attached to us not making God the savior and lord of our life.
00:28:47.519 --> 00:28:49.519
And you you had opened all these doors.
00:28:49.759 --> 00:29:01.519
But, you know, I'm really reminded as you share your story and you talk, I had goosebumps when you said that you walked into the chapel when you realized that she was not alive.
00:29:01.759 --> 00:29:07.519
And you look at the stained glass window, you look at the cross, you feel and experience Jesus.
00:29:07.680 --> 00:29:13.920
And I'm reminded of these verses that just says the God of all comfort, he ministers to us.
00:29:14.000 --> 00:29:20.400
Yes, he, when we don't know, it says that in groans, he gives us words to say.
00:29:20.720 --> 00:29:24.640
And, you know, he it says by his stripes, we are healed.
00:29:25.039 --> 00:29:31.279
In an instant, you wanted this healing for her, but God began to heal you.
00:29:31.519 --> 00:29:33.839
God began to set you free.
00:29:34.160 --> 00:29:40.480
And um, the word says he can do immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine.
00:29:40.559 --> 00:29:46.720
And it really sounds like God begins to meet you where you are and he begins to restore every part of your life.
00:29:46.880 --> 00:29:51.039
So I can't imagine, Gerald, what it must have been like as you said it.
00:29:51.279 --> 00:29:57.200
Here, her parents are grieving, you're grieving, you're trying to raise three small children.
00:29:57.519 --> 00:30:01.039
What were some of the emotions that you're going through?
00:30:01.279 --> 00:30:03.440
What are some of the feelings that you're having?
00:30:03.599 --> 00:30:06.960
And did you see any other red flags in other parts of your life?
00:30:07.119 --> 00:30:12.319
So you've gotten rid of all this stuff that you had it had allowed in.
00:30:13.039 --> 00:30:16.559
Well, one of the things that God showed me is uh patience.
00:30:16.799 --> 00:30:18.799
You know, we we don't like that one.
00:30:19.200 --> 00:30:38.720
And it was patience, and because I wanted my wife healed, and she wasn't healed yet, and I and I was I was a brand new Christian, and uh I thank God for my parents because my parents always told me when you want to be a successful person, follow someone that's already successful.
00:30:38.960 --> 00:30:39.920
Yeah, I believe that.
00:30:40.240 --> 00:30:46.079
Okay, and so I wanted to know God and I and I wanted to know more of him.
00:30:46.480 --> 00:30:53.839
So I I I found somebody in the church that was already there, and I did exactly what that person did.
00:30:53.920 --> 00:30:56.319
And I thank God for that put that in my personality.
00:30:56.480 --> 00:30:57.200
That's so powerful.
00:30:57.599 --> 00:31:01.279
I think that is a word for everybody that's watching.
00:31:01.519 --> 00:31:06.559
That find I heard the saying once, look at the five people that you're closest to, that's who you're becoming.
00:31:06.720 --> 00:31:14.480
And if you're not there yet, find someone who's already on the journey and hold tight to them, have them mentor you, form relationship.
00:31:14.559 --> 00:31:15.200
I love that.
00:31:15.359 --> 00:31:15.759
Yeah.
00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:22.400
And uh and at that time of my life, I uh I had I had a group of men that came into my life.
00:31:22.559 --> 00:31:23.359
It was a men's group.
00:31:23.680 --> 00:31:24.799
My first group was a men.
00:31:25.599 --> 00:31:28.720
And it was a these godly men that that prayed over me.
00:31:28.960 --> 00:31:45.039
And these men had even themselves, they had some of them had cancer, some of them were going through a divorce, some of them were going through issues with parents, and they were going through their own problems, and I got to see men pray over me.
00:31:45.519 --> 00:31:51.920
And those are the things that God used to show me because I was a I was a very cynical person when it came to people.
00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:58.559
You're a New Yorker, and as a New Yorker, if somebody comes up to me, that means you got some kind of game you want to play.
00:31:58.799 --> 00:32:16.240
What I would say to that is that, you know, really when you find uh God in the way that He wants to be found, and then you find a healthy Christian community, then you begin to see people in a different light and you encounter a different kind of people.
00:32:16.400 --> 00:32:16.720
Yes.
00:32:16.880 --> 00:32:18.880
And I'm I think that's what you're saying.
00:32:19.039 --> 00:32:21.119
This is what you found in that group of men.
00:32:21.279 --> 00:32:28.000
All of a sudden, these men are authentic and they want to give to you without expecting something in return.
00:32:28.160 --> 00:32:28.480
Yeah.
00:32:28.799 --> 00:32:34.880
So I would assume you had a real like life transformation through those relationships.
00:32:35.119 --> 00:32:35.440
Yes.
00:32:35.599 --> 00:32:40.480
And not only that, these men, but God also used the women of the church.
00:32:40.720 --> 00:32:43.359
They became surrogate mothers to my kids.
00:32:43.599 --> 00:32:44.000
Amen.
00:32:44.240 --> 00:32:47.200
Because I I started getting into ministry at that time too.
00:32:47.440 --> 00:32:53.440
And in fact, the first time I preached was the following Easter.
00:32:53.680 --> 00:32:54.240
Uh.
00:32:54.480 --> 00:32:56.480
And I didn't even know what I was doing.
00:32:56.799 --> 00:33:06.799
And it was a crazy time because and I found out that Philip Michael Thomas, you know, from Miami Vice, he was there also sitting there, and he heard what I had to say, and he was and he was touched by it.
00:33:07.039 --> 00:33:09.920
Tell me that you were wearing one of those pink suits when you did it.
00:33:10.160 --> 00:33:12.960
Back then I was wearing I was wearing Stacey Adams outfits.
00:33:13.039 --> 00:33:13.680
I have pictures of it.
00:33:13.759 --> 00:33:14.720
It's it's it's crazy.
00:33:14.960 --> 00:33:16.640
I love that because I didn't know what I was doing.
00:33:16.720 --> 00:33:16.960
Yeah.
00:33:17.119 --> 00:33:20.000
And what all I knew is that I needed God.
00:33:20.559 --> 00:33:26.240
And God, how he started to heal heal me is to bring people because I did not trust people.
00:33:26.640 --> 00:33:31.440
And God used that those people to change me.
00:33:31.920 --> 00:33:37.119
And uh I've had mothers, I've had people come to my house and bring food.
00:33:37.359 --> 00:33:39.680
I was never without food.
00:33:40.000 --> 00:33:47.119
People that found out that this happened to my wife, there's a restaurant down south, it's a Jamaican restaurant.
00:33:47.200 --> 00:33:49.519
They found out that this happened to me, called me up.
00:33:49.680 --> 00:33:51.680
Hey, come over, get food.
00:33:51.759 --> 00:33:52.640
I have food for you.
00:33:53.039 --> 00:33:54.240
And I have to pay for it.
00:33:54.559 --> 00:34:00.720
My cousin, uh, my brother-in-law, his wife, they prepared meals for the whole week for my family.
00:34:01.039 --> 00:34:03.279
So God was softening my heart.
00:34:03.519 --> 00:34:06.720
At the same time, my heart was broken for my wife.
00:34:07.119 --> 00:34:08.559
He was softening it.
00:34:09.679 --> 00:34:12.800
And that's one of the things that God used to change me.
00:34:13.039 --> 00:34:19.599
Yeah, and I really believe that as we walk out our faith, the best way we can do it is to show up for others.
00:34:19.760 --> 00:34:20.079
Yep.
00:34:20.320 --> 00:34:33.679
And we actually should be always continually looking for how we can meet the needs of others, because we never know who's dealing with something behind closed doors.
00:34:33.840 --> 00:34:35.440
We don't know what people carry.
00:34:35.599 --> 00:34:38.480
I've heard a quote that, you know, who's struggling?
00:34:38.719 --> 00:34:40.000
Literally everyone.
00:34:40.239 --> 00:34:41.119
So be kind.
00:34:41.280 --> 00:34:48.800
And I think it's the best way that we can be an example of Christ is to find people the way that people found you.
00:34:49.199 --> 00:34:58.800
And I I I've read a book recently that talks about actually eating together, communing together, breaking bread together.
00:34:58.960 --> 00:35:00.079
It's actually holy.
00:35:00.239 --> 00:35:00.400
Yes.
00:35:00.559 --> 00:35:02.000
This is biblical, right?
00:35:02.320 --> 00:35:02.639
Yes.
00:35:02.880 --> 00:35:04.800
So I believe in that.
00:35:04.960 --> 00:35:09.039
I believe that as we break bread together, as we have that community.
00:35:09.280 --> 00:35:13.360
There is something so holy and so pure and so beautiful about it.
00:35:13.599 --> 00:35:19.920
But I know that during that time, you continue to see the hand of God on your life.
00:35:20.159 --> 00:35:28.000
There have been blessing after blessing in your life, not only just the people that showed up for you, but in so many other ways.
00:35:28.239 --> 00:35:40.960
And I'm wondering if there is uh either a story that you want to share or a verse that you would like to share with us that would just encourage everyone tonight that might find themselves in a similar situation.
00:35:41.280 --> 00:35:44.400
Okay, I'll share a verse first and I'll give you a little story for that verse.
00:35:44.639 --> 00:35:51.360
So um, Psalm 34 became my life verse at that time of my life for those many years.
00:35:51.679 --> 00:36:00.400
And it basically says, What I what I mostly thought about the mo all the time was, I will bless the Lord at all times.
00:36:00.800 --> 00:36:09.760
His praise shall continually be in my mouth, my soul will make its boast in the Lord, the humble will hear it and rejoice.
00:36:10.639 --> 00:36:13.440
I sought the Lord and He answered me.
00:36:13.599 --> 00:36:13.920
Amen.
00:36:14.559 --> 00:36:18.559
That was that is what I lived by back then.
00:36:18.960 --> 00:36:25.679
And sure enough, after years of taking care of my wife, she needed 24 hour care.
00:36:26.239 --> 00:36:36.159
And I can't go into all the story, but God provided nursing care, God provided 24 hour service, but sometimes these people never showed up.
00:36:36.480 --> 00:36:44.800
And I would have to, after working, I would have to stay up and take care of my wife and witness her being there.
00:36:45.119 --> 00:36:51.199
It was crazy because God also showed me in that, he said, Joel, I'm gonna show you something.
00:36:51.599 --> 00:36:57.519
And it was, I'm gonna show you how to love someone that can't love you back.
00:36:58.480 --> 00:36:59.519
Because she couldn't love me back.
00:36:59.679 --> 00:37:00.320
That's powerful.
00:37:00.960 --> 00:37:02.480
And that hit me.
00:37:03.199 --> 00:37:05.280
You see, I couldn't believe it.
00:37:05.440 --> 00:37:06.639
I said, Oh wow.
00:37:06.880 --> 00:37:09.599
And he says, Now I want you to do it to others.
00:37:09.840 --> 00:37:11.199
It kind of sounds like Jesus.
00:37:11.280 --> 00:37:14.800
Yeah, you know, he loves us even when we don't yet know him.
00:37:15.360 --> 00:37:18.000
He loves us even when we yet haven't found him.
00:37:18.320 --> 00:37:23.679
He sacrificed everything even when we haven't acknowledged him as our Lord and Savior.
00:37:24.000 --> 00:37:24.480
Yep.
00:37:24.719 --> 00:37:30.480
And there and there and there have been times where I was, I couldn't, I couldn't deal with it anymore.
00:37:30.639 --> 00:37:32.719
I couldn't, I wanted to run away sometimes.
00:37:32.880 --> 00:37:33.119
Yeah.
00:37:33.280 --> 00:37:39.360
And I remember one time I told the Lord, I was praying, and I told the Lord, God, I can't do this anymore.
00:37:39.599 --> 00:37:41.360
My plate is full.
00:37:42.000 --> 00:37:43.440
God spoke to me.
00:37:44.320 --> 00:37:46.800
He said, Get a bigger plate.
00:37:47.199 --> 00:37:56.639
And as soon as he's told me that, I heard the verses in my heart when when uh Paul asked God to heal him.
00:37:56.800 --> 00:37:59.440
And he says, My grace is sufficient for me.
00:37:59.679 --> 00:38:01.280
I was just thinking of that verse.
00:38:01.599 --> 00:38:02.960
My grace is sufficient for you.
00:38:03.519 --> 00:38:05.519
And that's what God basically told me.
00:38:05.920 --> 00:38:08.159
And I remember leaving my house angry.
00:38:08.400 --> 00:38:10.719
This was like a midnight, and I went driving.
00:38:10.880 --> 00:38:12.400
You know, us guys, we have to go driving.
00:38:12.559 --> 00:38:12.719
Yeah.
00:38:12.880 --> 00:38:14.480
So I and I I went down south.
00:38:14.559 --> 00:38:21.760
I got off of the 216th exit on a turnpike, and I went and I parked the car underneath the uh the underpass, the overpass.
00:38:22.079 --> 00:38:24.960
And I said, God, I can't do this.
00:38:26.159 --> 00:38:27.920
And I said, God, do you love me?
00:38:29.039 --> 00:38:30.159
And do you know?
00:38:30.559 --> 00:38:35.760
I heard an audible voice in the passenger seat that said, I love you.
00:38:36.079 --> 00:38:36.880
Uh amen.
00:38:37.199 --> 00:38:57.280
And that I love you gave me the strength to go on to persist, to not only continue to take care of my wife, to take care of my kids, and to be the father, to be the mother, to be the friend, to be the jokester that I used to be to find who I can bring me back.
00:38:57.920 --> 00:39:11.039
And um, and uh, and people saw it and they were radiated to it, and people saw how I was in the midst of a tragedy, and that and people come up to me and say, Joe, I don't know how you're doing this.
00:39:11.679 --> 00:39:12.719
How are you doing this?
00:39:12.960 --> 00:39:14.320
How did you find joy in the sorrow?
00:39:14.639 --> 00:39:15.199
Exactly.
00:39:15.360 --> 00:39:23.039
And it's so funny that you say that, Christina, because there's one there's one book that I couldn't read for many years.
00:39:24.000 --> 00:39:24.639
James.
00:39:25.679 --> 00:39:27.119
Count it all joy.
00:39:27.360 --> 00:39:27.840
Amen.
00:39:28.079 --> 00:39:29.039
I couldn't read that.
00:39:29.280 --> 00:39:32.639
I wasn't joyful, but I never went further.
00:39:33.039 --> 00:39:36.000
Because as you go further, it says that that will bring you what?
00:39:36.239 --> 00:39:38.079
Patience, perseverance.
00:39:38.239 --> 00:39:40.239
I didn't I didn't want to hear it at that time.
00:39:40.559 --> 00:39:44.239
So for many years I didn't read that until God healed me.
00:39:44.400 --> 00:39:44.880
Yeah.
00:39:45.280 --> 00:39:52.239
And then that's when I understood after she passed that I can count it all joy.
00:39:52.480 --> 00:39:52.880
Amen.
00:39:53.039 --> 00:39:53.440
Amen.
00:39:53.599 --> 00:39:56.639
And and because there's a bigger story, Gerald.
00:39:56.960 --> 00:40:05.280
And this story of everything that happened and all the sorrow and the loss and the pain, this was meant to go out.
00:40:05.360 --> 00:40:10.639
And I really believe this as you share your story, even now, and you continue to share your testimony.
00:40:10.719 --> 00:40:21.440
It's gonna go out to thousands and hundreds of thousands of people that need to be encouraged, that they need to hear that audible voice in the passenger's seat saying, I love you.
00:40:21.679 --> 00:40:24.480
I've chosen you, I'm here for you.
00:40:24.800 --> 00:40:29.519
And the way that you took it day by day, God brought that community.
00:40:29.760 --> 00:40:34.239
You got into the word of God and God restored your entire life.
00:40:34.480 --> 00:40:36.000
I really believe this over your life.
00:40:36.159 --> 00:40:37.519
The best is yet to come.
00:40:37.760 --> 00:40:39.039
We've talked about this.
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:47.760
We know that we may not see it right now, but the promises that God gave you all those years ago, those promises still stand today.
00:40:48.000 --> 00:40:50.639
If God said he would do it, he will do it.
00:40:50.800 --> 00:40:55.519
And I'm very excited to see where God continues to take your life.
00:40:55.760 --> 00:41:01.519
Um, thank you so much for sharing and your vulnerability, your authenticity.
00:41:01.679 --> 00:41:04.639
Um, what I always end the podcast with a prayer.
00:41:04.800 --> 00:41:11.039
So we're just gonna take a moment to pray for everyone that might be walking through a similar situation.
00:41:11.199 --> 00:41:12.239
Let's pray.
00:41:13.519 --> 00:41:15.199
Father God, Lord, we love you.
00:41:15.280 --> 00:41:16.880
And God, we're so thankful.
00:41:17.039 --> 00:41:21.360
We're thankful, God, that we can find joy even in the suffering.
00:41:21.599 --> 00:41:28.320
God, we're thankful that you're a God that turns our mourning into dancing, our sorrow into joy.
00:41:28.559 --> 00:41:42.800
And God, the same way that you restored Gerald's entire life, Lord, in every moment, in every breath, God, as you've carried him, I pray for that individual that's looking at the news that they've received.
00:41:43.039 --> 00:41:49.599
God, maybe they're looking at the loss and the devastation, and they don't know how they're gonna put one foot in front of the other.
00:41:49.840 --> 00:41:53.440
They don't know how they're gonna go to sleep tonight and rest in peace.
00:41:53.519 --> 00:41:55.519
They don't know how they're gonna face tomorrow.
00:41:55.760 --> 00:42:00.159
But God, your word says, my grace is sufficient.
00:42:00.400 --> 00:42:02.079
You are an abundant God.
00:42:02.159 --> 00:42:03.599
You are a good Father.
00:42:03.840 --> 00:42:05.840
Lord Jesus, you will be faithful.
00:42:06.000 --> 00:42:11.920
Your word says this you will restore the years that the locusts have eaten.
00:42:12.079 --> 00:42:14.239
And so, God, we pray for restoration.
00:42:14.400 --> 00:42:17.679
We pray for healing, we pray for new life, God.
00:42:17.840 --> 00:42:24.159
Let this story go out to thousands and hundreds of thousands so that lives can be put all together.
00:42:24.400 --> 00:42:34.639
God, we pray for every promise over Gerald's life, every promise over his children, his legacy, God, the words of his mouth, the anointing that you've placed on him.
00:42:34.800 --> 00:42:44.159
And God, we thank you, God, that we can share this story and we can continue to experience your love in all vulnerability and in all faithfulness.
00:42:44.320 --> 00:42:45.440
God, you're so good.
00:42:45.599 --> 00:42:49.679
We give you the glory, we give you the honor and the praise in your mighty name.
00:42:49.920 --> 00:42:50.480
Amen.
00:42:50.719 --> 00:42:51.039
Amen.
00:42:51.280 --> 00:42:51.760
Amen.
00:42:52.079 --> 00:42:53.840
Gerald, thank you for being here.
00:42:54.000 --> 00:42:54.880
Thank you for sharing.
00:42:55.199 --> 00:42:55.599
Yes.
00:42:55.760 --> 00:43:05.599
And again, um if there's anyone out there that is going through a difficulty, yeah, and um and you don't know Jesus.
00:43:05.840 --> 00:43:06.239
Amen.
00:43:06.400 --> 00:43:17.039
If they don't know Jesus, I I I strongly recommend that you get to find someone that shared Jesus Christ with you.
00:43:17.280 --> 00:43:27.360
And I just feel right now, like I think it would be great for you to pray a salvation prayer for anybody that's out there and they don't know Jesus, and that you would just invite them to find the Lord.
00:43:27.440 --> 00:43:28.000
Let's pray.
00:43:28.239 --> 00:43:28.480
Okay.
00:43:28.639 --> 00:43:36.400
Dear Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus, Father, I pray that you send your Holy Spirit to whoever is hearing my voice right now, Father.
00:43:36.559 --> 00:43:41.920
I pray, Lord, that they would be able to hear you because, Father, you chose them.
00:43:42.079 --> 00:43:47.360
And I know, Father, that their heart is aching because there's a space in there, Lord, just made for you.
00:43:47.440 --> 00:44:02.400
And their heart is aching right now for that love, for that healing, for that forgiveness, Father, for that redemption that only comes from you, that came from your son Jesus Christ, who died on the cross, his blood was shed so that we can find freedom.
00:44:02.719 --> 00:44:19.920
So if you're feeling that tug right now, I will ask you that let it go and say yes to Jesus, yes to the new life, so you can get rid of that pain, the shame, the guilt, the sorrow that you're feeling right now, and be free in Jesus Christ.
00:44:20.480 --> 00:44:21.840
God promises freedom.
00:44:22.880 --> 00:44:25.920
He promises support, he promises his love.
00:44:27.440 --> 00:44:29.599
So come to him, say yes.
00:44:30.400 --> 00:44:34.239
Today is the day that the Lord says is your salvation.
00:44:35.119 --> 00:44:36.480
Don't walk away from it.
00:44:37.199 --> 00:44:37.920
Accept it.
00:44:38.320 --> 00:44:40.320
Take it, receive the gift.
00:44:40.639 --> 00:44:42.559
In Jesus' name I pray.
00:44:42.880 --> 00:44:43.519
Amen.
00:44:44.079 --> 00:44:44.719
Amen.
00:44:45.039 --> 00:44:46.159
Thank you so much.
00:44:46.400 --> 00:44:46.960
Amen.
00:44:47.280 --> 00:44:48.159
God is good.
00:44:48.559 --> 00:44:50.800
And I we're gonna continue.
00:44:50.880 --> 00:44:54.159
Those that prayed that prayer of salvation to cover them in prayer.
00:44:54.320 --> 00:44:55.440
Yeah, the best is ahead.
00:44:55.679 --> 00:45:03.360
And I pray and I thank God that uh you're gonna receive some messages, you're gonna receive some comments, and you're gonna receive some phone calls of people saying, Hey, I did it.
00:45:03.599 --> 00:45:04.000
Amen.
00:45:04.159 --> 00:45:06.159
And uh they're gonna receive some testimonies.
00:45:06.320 --> 00:45:06.639
Amen.
00:45:06.719 --> 00:45:09.199
That's what this this whole thing is all of this is for.
00:45:09.519 --> 00:45:10.320
Thank you so much.
00:45:10.480 --> 00:45:10.880
Amen.
00:45:11.360 --> 00:45:19.519
If you've enjoyed this conversation, it would mean the world to us if you would follow and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
00:45:19.760 --> 00:45:23.440
This has been Red Flags and Redemption.