WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en
00:00:00.960 --> 00:00:03.990
Today, we're drawing the line between
00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.710
networking and masterminding.
00:00:06.720 --> 00:00:09.430
By the end of this one, you're going to
00:00:09.440 --> 00:00:12.310
be able to look at every group you're
00:00:12.320 --> 00:00:14.789
currently part of and know exactly which
00:00:14.799 --> 00:00:17.269
one it is. So, keep listening. Welcome
00:00:17.279 --> 00:00:20.310
back. I'm Kelly. And I'm Heather. And
00:00:20.320 --> 00:00:21.990
today, we're picking up where we left
00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.870
off. We're talking about Napoleon Hill's
00:00:24.880 --> 00:00:27.990
mastermind principle.
00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.710
Woohoo. coordination of knowledge and
00:00:30.720 --> 00:00:33.750
effort in a spirit of harmony and for a
00:00:33.760 --> 00:00:35.510
definite purpose.
00:00:35.520 --> 00:00:37.990
>> And the question everybody asked us
00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.790
after the episode was some version of
00:00:40.800 --> 00:00:45.110
okay but how do I know if what I have is
00:00:45.120 --> 00:00:48.950
actually that. So let's get into it.
00:00:48.960 --> 00:00:50.869
>> All right. So for anyone who is just
00:00:50.879 --> 00:00:53.670
joining us, let's do a quick short
00:00:53.680 --> 00:00:55.110
recap.
00:00:55.120 --> 00:00:57.990
>> Okay, quick version. Napoleon Hill spent
00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.189
20 years studying the most successful
00:01:01.199 --> 00:01:04.070
people of his era and he found this one
00:01:04.080 --> 00:01:07.350
pattern. Nobody builds something
00:01:07.360 --> 00:01:11.590
significant alone.
00:01:11.600 --> 00:01:15.990
>> Not alone sink in.
00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.789
>> He called the mechanism behind it
00:01:18.799 --> 00:01:21.749
mastermind. coordination of knowledge
00:01:21.759 --> 00:01:25.510
and effort in a spirit of harmony
00:01:25.520 --> 00:01:29.190
between two or more people, two or more
00:01:29.200 --> 00:01:30.950
for the attainment of a definite
00:01:30.960 --> 00:01:34.310
purpose. That always reminds me from the
00:01:34.320 --> 00:01:36.310
Bible it says when two or more people
00:01:36.320 --> 00:01:40.390
are gathered together in his name.
00:01:40.400 --> 00:01:41.830
>> Makes a lot of sense.
00:01:41.840 --> 00:01:43.270
>> Yes. Yes.
00:01:43.280 --> 00:01:45.510
>> It makes a lot of sense. Napoleon Hill
00:01:45.520 --> 00:01:47.670
also talked about three po three parts
00:01:47.680 --> 00:01:49.429
to the mastermind. There was active
00:01:49.439 --> 00:01:51.030
coordination,
00:01:51.040 --> 00:01:54.069
harmony within the room, and a definite,
00:01:54.079 --> 00:01:58.709
specific, named, shared purpose. So
00:01:58.719 --> 00:01:59.510
important.
00:01:59.520 --> 00:02:02.389
>> Exactly. Exactly. And that third piece
00:02:02.399 --> 00:02:04.789
is where today's whole conversation
00:02:04.799 --> 00:02:08.389
lives because definite purpose is the
00:02:08.399 --> 00:02:12.390
piece most groups quietly don't have.
00:02:12.400 --> 00:02:15.030
>> All right. So, let's talk about what
00:02:15.040 --> 00:02:17.910
fills that gap instead.
00:02:17.920 --> 00:02:20.070
Okay. So, let's talk let's talk about
00:02:20.080 --> 00:02:21.510
networking
00:02:21.520 --> 00:02:25.270
>> because I don't want anybody to hear
00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:27.430
today's episode as networking is bad
00:02:27.440 --> 00:02:29.589
because it's not.
00:02:29.599 --> 00:02:32.070
It's just a different tool doing a
00:02:32.080 --> 00:02:33.830
different job.
00:02:33.840 --> 00:02:36.150
>> Okay. So, once again, define it for us.
00:02:36.160 --> 00:02:38.710
>> Networking is transactional.
00:02:38.720 --> 00:02:41.190
It's contact trading.
00:02:41.200 --> 00:02:45.190
I'll refer you if you refer me. Uh let's
00:02:45.200 --> 00:02:47.910
connect. Maybe we can work together
00:02:47.920 --> 00:02:50.790
someday. Here's my business card. It's
00:02:50.800 --> 00:02:53.430
built on mutual benefit,
00:02:53.440 --> 00:02:55.750
which is completely legitimate thing to
00:02:55.760 --> 00:02:57.509
build on.
00:02:57.519 --> 00:02:59.509
>> So, what is it good for then?
00:02:59.519 --> 00:03:02.229
>> Well, it's good for reach. It's good for
00:03:02.239 --> 00:03:04.390
opportunity. You meet the person who
00:03:04.400 --> 00:03:07.110
becomes the client, the connection, the
00:03:07.120 --> 00:03:10.229
door that opens 3 years from now.
00:03:10.239 --> 00:03:12.710
Woo. Don't I know that [laughter]
00:03:12.720 --> 00:03:16.630
networking is wide. It's supposed to be
00:03:16.640 --> 00:03:17.910
wide.
00:03:17.920 --> 00:03:19.910
>> Then what's the problem with it?
00:03:19.920 --> 00:03:22.790
>> The problem is when women mistake wide
00:03:22.800 --> 00:03:24.070
for deep.
00:03:24.080 --> 00:03:25.030
>> Ah,
00:03:25.040 --> 00:03:28.550
>> you can have 500 connections and still
00:03:28.560 --> 00:03:30.949
not have one single person who is
00:03:30.959 --> 00:03:34.149
coordinated with you actively toward the
00:03:34.159 --> 00:03:35.750
specific thing you're trying to build
00:03:35.760 --> 00:03:38.470
this year.
00:03:38.480 --> 00:03:43.670
>> So really so good. So really having a
00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:47.110
big network doesn't mean you're not
00:03:47.120 --> 00:03:49.750
alone.
00:03:49.760 --> 00:03:52.149
>> Yeah, it really doesn't. It really does
00:03:52.159 --> 00:03:55.030
not. And you can be the most connected
00:03:55.040 --> 00:03:59.110
person in the room, which I usually am,
00:03:59.120 --> 00:04:02.070
excuse me, and still be the loneliest
00:04:02.080 --> 00:04:05.670
person building towards your goal. Those
00:04:05.680 --> 00:04:08.630
two things are not related the way you
00:04:08.640 --> 00:04:10.710
think they are.
00:04:10.720 --> 00:04:12.470
I think that's great. Most people don't
00:04:12.480 --> 00:04:14.229
really realize that. And we're talking
00:04:14.239 --> 00:04:19.349
about gaps. That is a huge gap because
00:04:19.359 --> 00:04:21.990
think about what you just said. You
00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:23.430
really truly are one of the most
00:04:23.440 --> 00:04:25.909
connected people I know.
00:04:25.919 --> 00:04:27.270
But it doesn't mean that every
00:04:27.280 --> 00:04:29.830
networking event that we went to, again,
00:04:29.840 --> 00:04:32.150
keep networking,
00:04:32.160 --> 00:04:35.189
>> had really deep conversations.
00:04:35.199 --> 00:04:35.590
M
00:04:35.600 --> 00:04:37.510
>> and [clears throat] I think that is so
00:04:37.520 --> 00:04:39.350
key and so important to really
00:04:39.360 --> 00:04:40.950
understand.
00:04:40.960 --> 00:04:41.670
>> Yes.
00:04:41.680 --> 00:04:45.830
>> So since networking is wide
00:04:45.840 --> 00:04:48.230
then what does masterminding actually
00:04:48.240 --> 00:04:50.629
look like next to it?
00:04:50.639 --> 00:04:53.590
>> Masterminding is coordinating brain
00:04:53.600 --> 00:04:58.230
power in harmony pointed at one shared
00:04:58.240 --> 00:05:00.629
definite purpose.
00:05:00.639 --> 00:05:02.950
And if not, we might help each other one
00:05:02.960 --> 00:05:08.150
day or you know we we're actively
00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:10.710
working towards the same challenge right
00:05:10.720 --> 00:05:13.110
now together.
00:05:13.120 --> 00:05:15.430
>> So that's what you mean as deep.
00:05:15.440 --> 00:05:16.230
>> Yes.
00:05:16.240 --> 00:05:18.230
>> Got it. So let's make it concrete
00:05:18.240 --> 00:05:20.070
because everybody really wants to
00:05:20.080 --> 00:05:22.469
understand this. Walk me through an
00:05:22.479 --> 00:05:25.670
example of a mastermind.
00:05:25.680 --> 00:05:28.070
>> Okay. Sure I will.
00:05:28.080 --> 00:05:30.310
I love my masterminds. Okay. So
00:05:30.320 --> 00:05:33.909
mastermind, let's take six women.
00:05:33.919 --> 00:05:35.909
They're on a video call every other
00:05:35.919 --> 00:05:39.590
Wednesday morning, okay? And
00:05:39.600 --> 00:05:42.150
they each each one of them is there to
00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:44.710
create more money.
00:05:44.720 --> 00:05:46.469
Each one is going to take a turn in the
00:05:46.479 --> 00:05:50.390
hot seat. The hot seat means here's the
00:05:50.400 --> 00:05:54.950
exact decision I'm stuck on right now.
00:05:54.960 --> 00:05:57.270
The room doesn't
00:05:57.280 --> 00:06:00.790
I mean these women do not just go okay
00:06:00.800 --> 00:06:02.790
and they don't just nod along and go
00:06:02.800 --> 00:06:08.230
okay yeah all right they push back they
00:06:08.240 --> 00:06:12.390
ask the questions you have been avoiding
00:06:12.400 --> 00:06:15.510
and somebody's texting you on Friday to
00:06:15.520 --> 00:06:17.749
see if you've actually done what you
00:06:17.759 --> 00:06:20.390
said you were going to do
00:06:20.400 --> 00:06:21.590
>> that's definitely not going to happen at
00:06:21.600 --> 00:06:24.550
a networking event. So really the
00:06:24.560 --> 00:06:26.469
difference between a networking group
00:06:26.479 --> 00:06:28.950
and a mastermind isn't really the people
00:06:28.960 --> 00:06:31.110
cuz you could have the same people.
00:06:31.120 --> 00:06:31.590
>> Mhm.
00:06:31.600 --> 00:06:35.350
>> From a Tuesday night networking event to
00:06:35.360 --> 00:06:39.590
a Wednesday morning video mastermind.
00:06:39.600 --> 00:06:42.309
It's just the structure that that's what
00:06:42.319 --> 00:06:43.110
the difference is.
00:06:43.120 --> 00:06:44.070
>> Correct.
00:06:44.080 --> 00:06:46.150
>> And one word that came to mind is
00:06:46.160 --> 00:06:49.110
accountability. Ah yes yeah
00:06:49.120 --> 00:06:53.510
>> that came to mind because
00:06:53.520 --> 00:06:55.510
if somebody is going to get in contact
00:06:55.520 --> 00:07:00.070
with you and say hey how's it going? Did
00:07:00.080 --> 00:07:03.510
you contact that person to see if they
00:07:03.520 --> 00:07:05.670
needed somebody to come in and do
00:07:05.680 --> 00:07:08.364
whatever you know coach or whatever.
00:07:08.374 --> 00:07:11.990
[gasps] It's an accountability
00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:15.830
and it's the structure and the purpose.
00:07:15.840 --> 00:07:17.830
And you could take these six women and
00:07:17.840 --> 00:07:20.950
make it a networking mixer or a
00:07:20.960 --> 00:07:23.110
mastermind depending on whether there's
00:07:23.120 --> 00:07:26.230
a shared definite purpose. Everyone's
00:07:26.240 --> 00:07:30.790
actually coordinating around.
00:07:30.800 --> 00:07:32.550
>> I'm still feeling like there's a lot of
00:07:32.560 --> 00:07:35.270
miscommunication about it or the
00:07:35.280 --> 00:07:37.430
differences and not seeing. So why does
00:07:37.440 --> 00:07:40.150
it happen? Why do some people think that
00:07:40.160 --> 00:07:41.830
they have a mastermind when it's just
00:07:41.840 --> 00:07:46.150
networking and vice vice versa?
00:07:46.160 --> 00:07:50.390
>> Okay, so networking, I mean
00:07:50.400 --> 00:07:53.189
networking, you go, you meet and then
00:07:53.199 --> 00:07:56.390
you sometimes connect because harmony
00:07:56.400 --> 00:07:58.950
and purpose take maintenance.
00:07:58.960 --> 00:08:02.869
>> You have to have maintenance and contact
00:08:02.879 --> 00:08:04.790
trading doesn't
00:08:04.800 --> 00:08:08.390
>> at all. It's just easier to default to.
00:08:08.400 --> 00:08:10.629
I mean, you know, it's easier to say,
00:08:10.639 --> 00:08:13.189
"Oh, um, yeah, this feels comfortable.
00:08:13.199 --> 00:08:15.270
I'm going to go do this. Oh, and I can
00:08:15.280 --> 00:08:18.070
do that all day." And [clears throat]
00:08:18.080 --> 00:08:20.629
nobody has to be vulnerable,
00:08:20.639 --> 00:08:23.110
you know, to swap a business card at
00:08:23.120 --> 00:08:25.670
all. And nobody has to declare a real
00:08:25.680 --> 00:08:27.830
goal. They don't have to say, "Here's my
00:08:27.840 --> 00:08:32.870
goal. Here's my card." And yeah, okay.
00:08:32.880 --> 00:08:36.550
You know, I mean, there's no risk.
00:08:36.560 --> 00:08:38.389
There's no risk in taking a big a
00:08:38.399 --> 00:08:39.350
business card.
00:08:39.360 --> 00:08:42.709
>> It's so easy. Hence why we all have 500
00:08:42.719 --> 00:08:43.589
of them.
00:08:43.599 --> 00:08:45.110
>> Mhm. In a baggie.
00:08:45.120 --> 00:08:48.790
>> In a baggie that nobody wants to get rid
00:08:48.800 --> 00:08:50.150
of
00:08:50.160 --> 00:08:52.790
>> because they feel someday I might need
00:08:52.800 --> 00:08:56.230
that dog walker person. Someday I might
00:08:56.240 --> 00:08:59.670
need that brand designer, whatever it
00:08:59.680 --> 00:09:03.110
is. But do we ever I mean come on. Do we
00:09:03.120 --> 00:09:06.630
ever go searching through those cards?
00:09:06.640 --> 00:09:08.790
Maybe once or twice,
00:09:08.800 --> 00:09:10.949
>> but I don't know too many people who
00:09:10.959 --> 00:09:13.430
have. So I love what you said. It's it's
00:09:13.440 --> 00:09:16.550
easy to give a card out.
00:09:16.560 --> 00:09:18.870
>> So it's very comfortable. So it goes
00:09:18.880 --> 00:09:21.910
back to to the comfort thing.
00:09:21.920 --> 00:09:24.550
It is a comfort thing and it's also a
00:09:24.560 --> 00:09:28.949
leadership thing. A room does not become
00:09:28.959 --> 00:09:32.070
a mastermind by accident. Someone has to
00:09:32.080 --> 00:09:35.030
hold the purpose, keep it definite, keep
00:09:35.040 --> 00:09:38.470
the harmony intact when it gets tested.
00:09:38.480 --> 00:09:41.350
Without that, any group, no matter how
00:09:41.360 --> 00:09:43.910
good the people in it are, drifts back
00:09:43.920 --> 00:09:45.750
towards we're not just here to be nice
00:09:45.760 --> 00:09:47.990
to each other and maybe help each other
00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:50.470
out.
00:09:50.480 --> 00:09:53.910
Been there, done that. Pass that card.
00:09:53.920 --> 00:09:55.910
Again, just a bunch of women getting
00:09:55.920 --> 00:09:58.630
together to tell each other our woes,
00:09:58.640 --> 00:10:01.829
which again, it's not a bad thing.
00:10:01.839 --> 00:10:04.310
>> No, it's it it's not bad at all. Truly,
00:10:04.320 --> 00:10:06.150
it isn't because we all need that.
00:10:06.160 --> 00:10:06.710
>> We do.
00:10:06.720 --> 00:10:09.910
>> So, if someone realizes today, I've been
00:10:09.920 --> 00:10:11.910
calling my networking group a
00:10:11.920 --> 00:10:13.750
mastermind.
00:10:13.760 --> 00:10:15.910
>> That's not a failure. That's just
00:10:15.920 --> 00:10:19.110
clarity. Now, you know what you actually
00:10:19.120 --> 00:10:21.269
have and what you might still be
00:10:21.279 --> 00:10:23.590
missing.
00:10:23.600 --> 00:10:26.870
So this is exactly why we have built
00:10:26.880 --> 00:10:29.350
dream circle. We built it around the
00:10:29.360 --> 00:10:31.910
definite purpose piece first, not the
00:10:31.920 --> 00:10:34.150
networking piece.
00:10:34.160 --> 00:10:36.389
So walk us through it.
00:10:36.399 --> 00:10:40.069
>> Okay. Every woman who comes in names
00:10:40.079 --> 00:10:42.710
something specific pertaining to the
00:10:42.720 --> 00:10:46.389
shared named purpose.
00:10:46.399 --> 00:10:49.750
Not I want more out of my life. Way too
00:10:49.760 --> 00:10:52.949
general. It's a start, but that's not it
00:10:52.959 --> 00:10:55.670
yet. A definite purpose, something we
00:10:55.680 --> 00:10:58.470
can actually coordinate around, hold her
00:10:58.480 --> 00:11:02.069
to, ask hard questions about.
00:11:02.079 --> 00:11:03.829
>> Okay. And then the harmony piece, how
00:11:03.839 --> 00:11:07.430
does that come into play?
00:11:07.440 --> 00:11:09.750
>> That's on us to protect every single
00:11:09.760 --> 00:11:13.110
month. No competing energy, no holding
00:11:13.120 --> 00:11:15.910
back to protect your own position.
00:11:15.920 --> 00:11:19.030
Everyone's rowing the same direction,
00:11:19.040 --> 00:11:21.509
even when we're each rowing towards our
00:11:21.519 --> 00:11:24.069
own individual goal,
00:11:24.079 --> 00:11:26.069
>> right? So, it's a room where we're not
00:11:26.079 --> 00:11:28.470
there trying to impress each other. It's
00:11:28.480 --> 00:11:31.910
a room where we're committed to moving
00:11:31.920 --> 00:11:34.310
each other towards what we say that we
00:11:34.320 --> 00:11:35.030
want.
00:11:35.040 --> 00:11:37.350
>> Absolutely. And nobody's there to be
00:11:37.360 --> 00:11:39.829
impressed by you and nobody's there to
00:11:39.839 --> 00:11:42.389
pitch you. You say your goal out loud
00:11:42.399 --> 00:11:44.310
and the room goes to work on it with
00:11:44.320 --> 00:11:48.069
you. That's masterminding. That's the
00:11:48.079 --> 00:11:51.269
whole difference. Everybody is there to
00:11:51.279 --> 00:11:53.829
support you. So, here's what I want you
00:11:53.839 --> 00:11:56.949
to do after this episode. Go look at
00:11:56.959 --> 00:12:00.550
every group you're currently part of and
00:12:00.560 --> 00:12:03.990
ask the one question. Are we coordinated
00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:06.470
around the same definite purpose
00:12:06.480 --> 00:12:10.949
actively together or are we just
00:12:10.959 --> 00:12:14.629
connected? Because networking gets you
00:12:14.639 --> 00:12:19.990
contacts, mastermind gets you movement.
00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:22.550
>> That's it. That's the whole distinction.
00:12:22.560 --> 00:12:24.550
And if you've looked at your list and
00:12:24.560 --> 00:12:26.310
realized you don't have a mastermind
00:12:26.320 --> 00:12:29.030
yet, that's exactly why Dream Circle
00:12:29.040 --> 00:12:31.590
exists. Come find out what it feels like
00:12:31.600 --> 00:12:33.829
to be in a room that actually
00:12:33.839 --> 00:12:35.910
coordinated around your definite
00:12:35.920 --> 00:12:39.670
purpose, not just connected to it.
00:12:39.680 --> 00:12:41.190
>> All right. Thanks for being here this
00:12:41.200 --> 00:12:43.269
week. [music] We'll see you in the next
00:12:43.279 --> 00:12:46.279
one.
Kind: captions
Language: en
00:00:00.960 --> 00:00:03.990
Today, we're drawing the line between
00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.710
networking and masterminding.
00:00:06.720 --> 00:00:09.430
By the end of this one, you're going to
00:00:09.440 --> 00:00:12.310
be able to look at every group you're
00:00:12.320 --> 00:00:14.789
currently part of and know exactly which
00:00:14.799 --> 00:00:17.269
one it is. So, keep listening. Welcome
00:00:17.279 --> 00:00:20.310
back. I'm Kelly. And I'm Heather. And
00:00:20.320 --> 00:00:21.990
today, we're picking up where we left
00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.870
off. We're talking about Napoleon Hill's
00:00:24.880 --> 00:00:27.990
mastermind principle.
00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.710
Woohoo. coordination of knowledge and
00:00:30.720 --> 00:00:33.750
effort in a spirit of harmony and for a
00:00:33.760 --> 00:00:35.510
definite purpose.
00:00:35.520 --> 00:00:37.990
>> And the question everybody asked us
00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.790
after the episode was some version of
00:00:40.800 --> 00:00:45.110
okay but how do I know if what I have is
00:00:45.120 --> 00:00:48.950
actually that. So let's get into it.
00:00:48.960 --> 00:00:50.869
>> All right. So for anyone who is just
00:00:50.879 --> 00:00:53.670
joining us, let's do a quick short
00:00:53.680 --> 00:00:55.110
recap.
00:00:55.120 --> 00:00:57.990
>> Okay, quick version. Napoleon Hill spent
00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.189
20 years studying the most successful
00:01:01.199 --> 00:01:04.070
people of his era and he found this one
00:01:04.080 --> 00:01:07.350
pattern. Nobody builds something
00:01:07.360 --> 00:01:11.590
significant alone.
00:01:11.600 --> 00:01:15.990
>> Not alone sink in.
00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.789
>> He called the mechanism behind it
00:01:18.799 --> 00:01:21.749
mastermind. coordination of knowledge
00:01:21.759 --> 00:01:25.510
and effort in a spirit of harmony
00:01:25.520 --> 00:01:29.190
between two or more people, two or more
00:01:29.200 --> 00:01:30.950
for the attainment of a definite
00:01:30.960 --> 00:01:34.310
purpose. That always reminds me from the
00:01:34.320 --> 00:01:36.310
Bible it says when two or more people
00:01:36.320 --> 00:01:40.390
are gathered together in his name.
00:01:40.400 --> 00:01:41.830
>> Makes a lot of sense.
00:01:41.840 --> 00:01:43.270
>> Yes. Yes.
00:01:43.280 --> 00:01:45.510
>> It makes a lot of sense. Napoleon Hill
00:01:45.520 --> 00:01:47.670
also talked about three po three parts
00:01:47.680 --> 00:01:49.429
to the mastermind. There was active
00:01:49.439 --> 00:01:51.030
coordination,
00:01:51.040 --> 00:01:54.069
harmony within the room, and a definite,
00:01:54.079 --> 00:01:58.709
specific, named, shared purpose. So
00:01:58.719 --> 00:01:59.510
important.
00:01:59.520 --> 00:02:02.389
>> Exactly. Exactly. And that third piece
00:02:02.399 --> 00:02:04.789
is where today's whole conversation
00:02:04.799 --> 00:02:08.389
lives because definite purpose is the
00:02:08.399 --> 00:02:12.390
piece most groups quietly don't have.
00:02:12.400 --> 00:02:15.030
>> All right. So, let's talk about what
00:02:15.040 --> 00:02:17.910
fills that gap instead.
00:02:17.920 --> 00:02:20.070
Okay. So, let's talk let's talk about
00:02:20.080 --> 00:02:21.510
networking
00:02:21.520 --> 00:02:25.270
>> because I don't want anybody to hear
00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:27.430
today's episode as networking is bad
00:02:27.440 --> 00:02:29.589
because it's not.
00:02:29.599 --> 00:02:32.070
It's just a different tool doing a
00:02:32.080 --> 00:02:33.830
different job.
00:02:33.840 --> 00:02:36.150
>> Okay. So, once again, define it for us.
00:02:36.160 --> 00:02:38.710
>> Networking is transactional.
00:02:38.720 --> 00:02:41.190
It's contact trading.
00:02:41.200 --> 00:02:45.190
I'll refer you if you refer me. Uh let's
00:02:45.200 --> 00:02:47.910
connect. Maybe we can work together
00:02:47.920 --> 00:02:50.790
someday. Here's my business card. It's
00:02:50.800 --> 00:02:53.430
built on mutual benefit,
00:02:53.440 --> 00:02:55.750
which is completely legitimate thing to
00:02:55.760 --> 00:02:57.509
build on.
00:02:57.519 --> 00:02:59.509
>> So, what is it good for then?
00:02:59.519 --> 00:03:02.229
>> Well, it's good for reach. It's good for
00:03:02.239 --> 00:03:04.390
opportunity. You meet the person who
00:03:04.400 --> 00:03:07.110
becomes the client, the connection, the
00:03:07.120 --> 00:03:10.229
door that opens 3 years from now.
00:03:10.239 --> 00:03:12.710
Woo. Don't I know that [laughter]
00:03:12.720 --> 00:03:16.630
networking is wide. It's supposed to be
00:03:16.640 --> 00:03:17.910
wide.
00:03:17.920 --> 00:03:19.910
>> Then what's the problem with it?
00:03:19.920 --> 00:03:22.790
>> The problem is when women mistake wide
00:03:22.800 --> 00:03:24.070
for deep.
00:03:24.080 --> 00:03:25.030
>> Ah,
00:03:25.040 --> 00:03:28.550
>> you can have 500 connections and still
00:03:28.560 --> 00:03:30.949
not have one single person who is
00:03:30.959 --> 00:03:34.149
coordinated with you actively toward the
00:03:34.159 --> 00:03:35.750
specific thing you're trying to build
00:03:35.760 --> 00:03:38.470
this year.
00:03:38.480 --> 00:03:43.670
>> So really so good. So really having a
00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:47.110
big network doesn't mean you're not
00:03:47.120 --> 00:03:49.750
alone.
00:03:49.760 --> 00:03:52.149
>> Yeah, it really doesn't. It really does
00:03:52.159 --> 00:03:55.030
not. And you can be the most connected
00:03:55.040 --> 00:03:59.110
person in the room, which I usually am,
00:03:59.120 --> 00:04:02.070
excuse me, and still be the loneliest
00:04:02.080 --> 00:04:05.670
person building towards your goal. Those
00:04:05.680 --> 00:04:08.630
two things are not related the way you
00:04:08.640 --> 00:04:10.710
think they are.
00:04:10.720 --> 00:04:12.470
I think that's great. Most people don't
00:04:12.480 --> 00:04:14.229
really realize that. And we're talking
00:04:14.239 --> 00:04:19.349
about gaps. That is a huge gap because
00:04:19.359 --> 00:04:21.990
think about what you just said. You
00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:23.430
really truly are one of the most
00:04:23.440 --> 00:04:25.909
connected people I know.
00:04:25.919 --> 00:04:27.270
But it doesn't mean that every
00:04:27.280 --> 00:04:29.830
networking event that we went to, again,
00:04:29.840 --> 00:04:32.150
keep networking,
00:04:32.160 --> 00:04:35.189
>> had really deep conversations.
00:04:35.199 --> 00:04:35.590
M
00:04:35.600 --> 00:04:37.510
>> and [clears throat] I think that is so
00:04:37.520 --> 00:04:39.350
key and so important to really
00:04:39.360 --> 00:04:40.950
understand.
00:04:40.960 --> 00:04:41.670
>> Yes.
00:04:41.680 --> 00:04:45.830
>> So since networking is wide
00:04:45.840 --> 00:04:48.230
then what does masterminding actually
00:04:48.240 --> 00:04:50.629
look like next to it?
00:04:50.639 --> 00:04:53.590
>> Masterminding is coordinating brain
00:04:53.600 --> 00:04:58.230
power in harmony pointed at one shared
00:04:58.240 --> 00:05:00.629
definite purpose.
00:05:00.639 --> 00:05:02.950
And if not, we might help each other one
00:05:02.960 --> 00:05:08.150
day or you know we we're actively
00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:10.710
working towards the same challenge right
00:05:10.720 --> 00:05:13.110
now together.
00:05:13.120 --> 00:05:15.430
>> So that's what you mean as deep.
00:05:15.440 --> 00:05:16.230
>> Yes.
00:05:16.240 --> 00:05:18.230
>> Got it. So let's make it concrete
00:05:18.240 --> 00:05:20.070
because everybody really wants to
00:05:20.080 --> 00:05:22.469
understand this. Walk me through an
00:05:22.479 --> 00:05:25.670
example of a mastermind.
00:05:25.680 --> 00:05:28.070
>> Okay. Sure I will.
00:05:28.080 --> 00:05:30.310
I love my masterminds. Okay. So
00:05:30.320 --> 00:05:33.909
mastermind, let's take six women.
00:05:33.919 --> 00:05:35.909
They're on a video call every other
00:05:35.919 --> 00:05:39.590
Wednesday morning, okay? And
00:05:39.600 --> 00:05:42.150
they each each one of them is there to
00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:44.710
create more money.
00:05:44.720 --> 00:05:46.469
Each one is going to take a turn in the
00:05:46.479 --> 00:05:50.390
hot seat. The hot seat means here's the
00:05:50.400 --> 00:05:54.950
exact decision I'm stuck on right now.
00:05:54.960 --> 00:05:57.270
The room doesn't
00:05:57.280 --> 00:06:00.790
I mean these women do not just go okay
00:06:00.800 --> 00:06:02.790
and they don't just nod along and go
00:06:02.800 --> 00:06:08.230
okay yeah all right they push back they
00:06:08.240 --> 00:06:12.390
ask the questions you have been avoiding
00:06:12.400 --> 00:06:15.510
and somebody's texting you on Friday to
00:06:15.520 --> 00:06:17.749
see if you've actually done what you
00:06:17.759 --> 00:06:20.390
said you were going to do
00:06:20.400 --> 00:06:21.590
>> that's definitely not going to happen at
00:06:21.600 --> 00:06:24.550
a networking event. So really the
00:06:24.560 --> 00:06:26.469
difference between a networking group
00:06:26.479 --> 00:06:28.950
and a mastermind isn't really the people
00:06:28.960 --> 00:06:31.110
cuz you could have the same people.
00:06:31.120 --> 00:06:31.590
>> Mhm.
00:06:31.600 --> 00:06:35.350
>> From a Tuesday night networking event to
00:06:35.360 --> 00:06:39.590
a Wednesday morning video mastermind.
00:06:39.600 --> 00:06:42.309
It's just the structure that that's what
00:06:42.319 --> 00:06:43.110
the difference is.
00:06:43.120 --> 00:06:44.070
>> Correct.
00:06:44.080 --> 00:06:46.150
>> And one word that came to mind is
00:06:46.160 --> 00:06:49.110
accountability. Ah yes yeah
00:06:49.120 --> 00:06:53.510
>> that came to mind because
00:06:53.520 --> 00:06:55.510
if somebody is going to get in contact
00:06:55.520 --> 00:07:00.070
with you and say hey how's it going? Did
00:07:00.080 --> 00:07:03.510
you contact that person to see if they
00:07:03.520 --> 00:07:05.670
needed somebody to come in and do
00:07:05.680 --> 00:07:08.364
whatever you know coach or whatever.
00:07:08.374 --> 00:07:11.990
[gasps] It's an accountability
00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:15.830
and it's the structure and the purpose.
00:07:15.840 --> 00:07:17.830
And you could take these six women and
00:07:17.840 --> 00:07:20.950
make it a networking mixer or a
00:07:20.960 --> 00:07:23.110
mastermind depending on whether there's
00:07:23.120 --> 00:07:26.230
a shared definite purpose. Everyone's
00:07:26.240 --> 00:07:30.790
actually coordinating around.
00:07:30.800 --> 00:07:32.550
>> I'm still feeling like there's a lot of
00:07:32.560 --> 00:07:35.270
miscommunication about it or the
00:07:35.280 --> 00:07:37.430
differences and not seeing. So why does
00:07:37.440 --> 00:07:40.150
it happen? Why do some people think that
00:07:40.160 --> 00:07:41.830
they have a mastermind when it's just
00:07:41.840 --> 00:07:46.150
networking and vice vice versa?
00:07:46.160 --> 00:07:50.390
>> Okay, so networking, I mean
00:07:50.400 --> 00:07:53.189
networking, you go, you meet and then
00:07:53.199 --> 00:07:56.390
you sometimes connect because harmony
00:07:56.400 --> 00:07:58.950
and purpose take maintenance.
00:07:58.960 --> 00:08:02.869
>> You have to have maintenance and contact
00:08:02.879 --> 00:08:04.790
trading doesn't
00:08:04.800 --> 00:08:08.390
>> at all. It's just easier to default to.
00:08:08.400 --> 00:08:10.629
I mean, you know, it's easier to say,
00:08:10.639 --> 00:08:13.189
"Oh, um, yeah, this feels comfortable.
00:08:13.199 --> 00:08:15.270
I'm going to go do this. Oh, and I can
00:08:15.280 --> 00:08:18.070
do that all day." And [clears throat]
00:08:18.080 --> 00:08:20.629
nobody has to be vulnerable,
00:08:20.639 --> 00:08:23.110
you know, to swap a business card at
00:08:23.120 --> 00:08:25.670
all. And nobody has to declare a real
00:08:25.680 --> 00:08:27.830
goal. They don't have to say, "Here's my
00:08:27.840 --> 00:08:32.870
goal. Here's my card." And yeah, okay.
00:08:32.880 --> 00:08:36.550
You know, I mean, there's no risk.
00:08:36.560 --> 00:08:38.389
There's no risk in taking a big a
00:08:38.399 --> 00:08:39.350
business card.
00:08:39.360 --> 00:08:42.709
>> It's so easy. Hence why we all have 500
00:08:42.719 --> 00:08:43.589
of them.
00:08:43.599 --> 00:08:45.110
>> Mhm. In a baggie.
00:08:45.120 --> 00:08:48.790
>> In a baggie that nobody wants to get rid
00:08:48.800 --> 00:08:50.150
of
00:08:50.160 --> 00:08:52.790
>> because they feel someday I might need
00:08:52.800 --> 00:08:56.230
that dog walker person. Someday I might
00:08:56.240 --> 00:08:59.670
need that brand designer, whatever it
00:08:59.680 --> 00:09:03.110
is. But do we ever I mean come on. Do we
00:09:03.120 --> 00:09:06.630
ever go searching through those cards?
00:09:06.640 --> 00:09:08.790
Maybe once or twice,
00:09:08.800 --> 00:09:10.949
>> but I don't know too many people who
00:09:10.959 --> 00:09:13.430
have. So I love what you said. It's it's
00:09:13.440 --> 00:09:16.550
easy to give a card out.
00:09:16.560 --> 00:09:18.870
>> So it's very comfortable. So it goes
00:09:18.880 --> 00:09:21.910
back to to the comfort thing.
00:09:21.920 --> 00:09:24.550
It is a comfort thing and it's also a
00:09:24.560 --> 00:09:28.949
leadership thing. A room does not become
00:09:28.959 --> 00:09:32.070
a mastermind by accident. Someone has to
00:09:32.080 --> 00:09:35.030
hold the purpose, keep it definite, keep
00:09:35.040 --> 00:09:38.470
the harmony intact when it gets tested.
00:09:38.480 --> 00:09:41.350
Without that, any group, no matter how
00:09:41.360 --> 00:09:43.910
good the people in it are, drifts back
00:09:43.920 --> 00:09:45.750
towards we're not just here to be nice
00:09:45.760 --> 00:09:47.990
to each other and maybe help each other
00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:50.470
out.
00:09:50.480 --> 00:09:53.910
Been there, done that. Pass that card.
00:09:53.920 --> 00:09:55.910
Again, just a bunch of women getting
00:09:55.920 --> 00:09:58.630
together to tell each other our woes,
00:09:58.640 --> 00:10:01.829
which again, it's not a bad thing.
00:10:01.839 --> 00:10:04.310
>> No, it's it it's not bad at all. Truly,
00:10:04.320 --> 00:10:06.150
it isn't because we all need that.
00:10:06.160 --> 00:10:06.710
>> We do.
00:10:06.720 --> 00:10:09.910
>> So, if someone realizes today, I've been
00:10:09.920 --> 00:10:11.910
calling my networking group a
00:10:11.920 --> 00:10:13.750
mastermind.
00:10:13.760 --> 00:10:15.910
>> That's not a failure. That's just
00:10:15.920 --> 00:10:19.110
clarity. Now, you know what you actually
00:10:19.120 --> 00:10:21.269
have and what you might still be
00:10:21.279 --> 00:10:23.590
missing.
00:10:23.600 --> 00:10:26.870
So this is exactly why we have built
00:10:26.880 --> 00:10:29.350
dream circle. We built it around the
00:10:29.360 --> 00:10:31.910
definite purpose piece first, not the
00:10:31.920 --> 00:10:34.150
networking piece.
00:10:34.160 --> 00:10:36.389
So walk us through it.
00:10:36.399 --> 00:10:40.069
>> Okay. Every woman who comes in names
00:10:40.079 --> 00:10:42.710
something specific pertaining to the
00:10:42.720 --> 00:10:46.389
shared named purpose.
00:10:46.399 --> 00:10:49.750
Not I want more out of my life. Way too
00:10:49.760 --> 00:10:52.949
general. It's a start, but that's not it
00:10:52.959 --> 00:10:55.670
yet. A definite purpose, something we
00:10:55.680 --> 00:10:58.470
can actually coordinate around, hold her
00:10:58.480 --> 00:11:02.069
to, ask hard questions about.
00:11:02.079 --> 00:11:03.829
>> Okay. And then the harmony piece, how
00:11:03.839 --> 00:11:07.430
does that come into play?
00:11:07.440 --> 00:11:09.750
>> That's on us to protect every single
00:11:09.760 --> 00:11:13.110
month. No competing energy, no holding
00:11:13.120 --> 00:11:15.910
back to protect your own position.
00:11:15.920 --> 00:11:19.030
Everyone's rowing the same direction,
00:11:19.040 --> 00:11:21.509
even when we're each rowing towards our
00:11:21.519 --> 00:11:24.069
own individual goal,
00:11:24.079 --> 00:11:26.069
>> right? So, it's a room where we're not
00:11:26.079 --> 00:11:28.470
there trying to impress each other. It's
00:11:28.480 --> 00:11:31.910
a room where we're committed to moving
00:11:31.920 --> 00:11:34.310
each other towards what we say that we
00:11:34.320 --> 00:11:35.030
want.
00:11:35.040 --> 00:11:37.350
>> Absolutely. And nobody's there to be
00:11:37.360 --> 00:11:39.829
impressed by you and nobody's there to
00:11:39.839 --> 00:11:42.389
pitch you. You say your goal out loud
00:11:42.399 --> 00:11:44.310
and the room goes to work on it with
00:11:44.320 --> 00:11:48.069
you. That's masterminding. That's the
00:11:48.079 --> 00:11:51.269
whole difference. Everybody is there to
00:11:51.279 --> 00:11:53.829
support you. So, here's what I want you
00:11:53.839 --> 00:11:56.949
to do after this episode. Go look at
00:11:56.959 --> 00:12:00.550
every group you're currently part of and
00:12:00.560 --> 00:12:03.990
ask the one question. Are we coordinated
00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:06.470
around the same definite purpose
00:12:06.480 --> 00:12:10.949
actively together or are we just
00:12:10.959 --> 00:12:14.629
connected? Because networking gets you
00:12:14.639 --> 00:12:19.990
contacts, mastermind gets you movement.
00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:22.550
>> That's it. That's the whole distinction.
00:12:22.560 --> 00:12:24.550
And if you've looked at your list and
00:12:24.560 --> 00:12:26.310
realized you don't have a mastermind
00:12:26.320 --> 00:12:29.030
yet, that's exactly why Dream Circle
00:12:29.040 --> 00:12:31.590
exists. Come find out what it feels like
00:12:31.600 --> 00:12:33.829
to be in a room that actually
00:12:33.839 --> 00:12:35.910
coordinated around your definite
00:12:35.920 --> 00:12:39.670
purpose, not just connected to it.
00:12:39.680 --> 00:12:41.190
>> All right. Thanks for being here this
00:12:41.200 --> 00:12:43.269
week. [music] We'll see you in the next
00:12:43.279 --> 00:12:46.279
one.
