Episode 001 Waiting for Something That Never Comes.

I’ve been reading this play. It’s about two guys standing by a road, waiting for someone named Godot. They don’t know when he’s coming. They don’t know what he looks like. They wait the entire play. He never shows up.

For reasons I couldn’t explain at the time, it made more sense than anything I’d read in months.

This episode is about waiting. The deeper kind of waiting. The kind where you’re waiting for your life to start making sense. Where you’re waiting for the version of yourself who has it figured out to finally arrive and take over. We do this constantly, especially as fathers. Especially as men who were told there’s a moment where it all clicks.

The answer isn’t despair. It’s revolt. A quiet refusal to let the absence of guaranteed meaning become an excuse to stop building it yourself.

That idea changed how I think about the daily loop. The repetition. The showing up without certainty. The pushing of boulders that roll back down.

This is the first episode of The Process: Field Notes. It’s an audio essay, less than 10 minutes, meant to be listened to on a drive or a walk. One idea, followed somewhere honest. No interviews, no guests. Just thinking out loud.