Karli Visconto: Hi. How are you?
Jessica DeRose: Hello! On today's game of Where's Jess?
Karli Visconto: So funny, because you play this game when it comes to the podcast. And then I play this game when it comes to work. My coworkers are always like, you're always in a different house, always in a different room. So you get to play this role on the podcast. And today she is reporting live from.
Jessica DeRose: ⁓ yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ant's Ant's truck. It's nice and roomy. Yeah, we're going to run some errands after, but I came with him to his physical therapy appointment, but I am sitting in the car, podcasting.
Karli Visconto: You just said you're at PT with him? Whoever said podcasts have any bounds? You can do it anytime, anywhere.
Jessica DeRose: Now I know, right? Could be, anyway. I mean, listen, I did it from Costa Rica. I think I can do it from the parking lot of PT, you know? But funnily enough, I'm on a hotspot right now. You should actually see my setup. It's kind of hilarious. I think I need to take a picture of it. Like, what my setup looks like right now. I have a podcast microphone in a car, like, and somehow the quality, like, usually Carly and I have to troubleshoot prior to every podcast, like when I'm on Wi-Fi at home. But today, seamless.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, please do.
Jessica DeRose: And I'm literally plugged into my computer charger is plugged into his truck. Like I have a tripod.
Karli Visconto: All right, let's not get so cocky so soon in the podcast. Just want to call it out. There's still a lot of like slow your roll. For all I know, your laptop will die in 20 minutes because it loses batteries so quickly. So let's just pump the brakes. Be grateful that we're off to a smooth start. It is so funny, though, like you have a lot of faith in that hot spot. I will say that.
Jessica DeRose: No, seriously, I know, I know. This is so funny. It's about now I know. Yeah, this is true. I really do. I was like, you know what? I'm just going to do it. Full send.
Karli Visconto: Well, my laptop is situated on top of a laundry basket right now. So a girl that gets it done both you and me
Jessica DeRose: Wait, I feel like you should take a picture of your setup and we'll, yeah, yeah. It honestly is so funny and that's, well, I guess I'm getting a little ahead of myself about what we did this week or last week at this point. ⁓ But it is cool to see the behind the scenes, because you just see this, but what I'm looking at right now is just hilarious. And so yeah, think knowing that your laptop is on a laundry basket and like.
Karli Visconto: My POV and yours, okay. Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: seeing what you're looking at is just so cool. People just love the behind the scenes, I feel like. And so do I.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, I was just gonna say so do I too. I'm always so curious about that. And I think it just also showcases like nothing is as polished as it seems. Like the things that people do just to make things work, like you always think like the product, I mean, for this podcast specifically, we intentionally took it away from the studio so that it did have more of like an only human girl chat feel to it. And actually just yesterday somebody was like, I've been loving the vibe of season two. Like it really does just feel like I'm listening in on my friends. ⁓
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. ⁓ my god, so true.
Karli Visconto: But I think when you do see the behind the scenes, you got to just see the moments that aren't portrayed and aren't part of the highlight reel. And I think it just really encourages people to just do the thing, even if it doesn't look perfect, because the things that look perfect never are anyway, you know?
Jessica DeRose: Yes. Oh, for sure. That just reminds me of, you know, when people take a picture of their kitchen. And this is very specific, but like they'll take a picture of their kitchen and then really it's like all the stuff that was on the counter is on the floor behind the island. And like you can't see all of those things, but it really just like, I mean, yeah, the behind the scenes and that's why I love doing it. And I want to start vlogging, like all of our experiences and stuff, because it's so good and so only human coded to let people in on the fact that none of this is perfect. And just like your video from Fox 29, maybe it looked a certain way, but it didn't feel that way. And so I think it's such a good point to say when people are thinking about doing something or thinking about, oh, I don't have everything in line, or it's not perfect, or I need this perfect thing, it never is and it very rarely will be. So I love it.
Karli Visconto: That's like literally so on brand with what we're gonna talk about today too, which we didn't even plan this, but before we get into the actual topic, which we're gonna talk about imposter syndrome mainly, think it would be, I almost said cute. I think it would be cute. I think it would be cool to just quickly recap Fox 29, because we were on last Wednesday, right? And we're recording this Friday morning. It comes out on Monday, just to give everybody a little timeline.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. cute. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: But that was a big deal. mean, live TV is no joke. And I don't think I really understood the nature of the beast until I was in that moment, which is why it felt like such a heightened moment. And I had so much pressure, but how did you feel? How did you think it went?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't know, because we were on live TV before, so I'm having a hard time associating it with live TV. I think it was just the fact that I knew that Fox 29 was a really big deal. And not that Positively Philly wasn't a big deal. It was, but it just felt like I had never heard of Positively Philly before. I'd never watched it. I don't know anyone that watched it. it just felt a little bit.
Karli Visconto: It was a bigger scale.
Jessica DeRose: bit less tangible, I guess. so knowing that Fox 29 is actually a really big freaking deal and the anchors are no freaking joke. Alex has won Emmys. That was just, I think, set the stage for a little bit more nerves and a little bit more of worry, I guess.
Karli Visconto: I totally agree. It definitely had like a different feel to it. And when we went into Positively Philly, I think we were like, just a little bit more naive. And also, the hosts are just two girls that are our own age. And it just felt like very conversational and what we do on the podcast every single day. Fox 29 definitely had like a different feel to it in a really good way. And I think like these opportunities are things that we're gonna need to get comfortable with. every single rep we can get like
Jessica DeRose: Just like yeah, yeah, totally ⁓ yeah.
Karli Visconto: willing to take and it's good practice, but it doesn't change the fact that it felt really scary. We also like we're marketing it a little bit and to me when we post on our socials both on Only Human and like our personal, hey we're gonna be on Fox 29 tomorrow, 730, tune in. That's now all I'm thinking about. Everybody tuning in because if we didn't tell anybody and it was like a little bit of a surprise I think I would have been like, all right this is just kind of
Jessica DeRose: That's what it, yeah. is that.
Karli Visconto: and unassuming, like some people will see it, some people won't. But the fact that we were like kind of blasting it out there, I was really, really nervous going into it.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, yeah. What do you think? So it sounds like, and this is not like a new thing. I think this has a lot of translation into posting on social media. But what do you think it is about friends and family seeing it that makes it more scary than just strangers? Because I think like sometimes those feelings are a little bit backwards, that makes sense. Like these are the people that know you the best, that love you the most and support you. And so
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: I think that they are going to be the least judgmental people. And so what about that, if you can call it out, makes it the most scary?
Karli Visconto: Such a good question, such a good question. I feel like maybe two things. The first thing that comes to my mind is because we care more about their opinions, because we value them as an individual, we love them and so we care. But two, if we do have this moment of failure or embarrassment, we have to face them more often, whereas strangers will never come into contact with them.
Jessica DeRose: That's fair. Yeah, that's fair. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: And so it's like, whatever, whatever they experienced, the version of me that they know or think they know doesn't apply, doesn't really impact me. But if we are like humiliated on live TV and our friends and family see it, then we're talking about it. Then they have that in their back of their head every time they see us. I think that's probably what it boils down to, at least for me.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I could see that. I feel like that's also how it goes with posting on social media and TikTok and stuff. I don't know. I'd rather a million strangers see my TikTok than one person that I know. So yeah.
Karli Visconto: No, nothing is more mortifying than seeing somebody in person and then being like, oh my God, your TikToks up on my for you page. I'm like, and no they don't, that's not me. Keep scrolling. It is funny though, I didn't expect a lot of people to resonate with that video I put up about how I was feeling going into Fox 29 and throughout that whole segment. And I think it just really sheds light on the fact that I am not alone in dealing with this.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, you're like, mm. No, thank you. ⁓ Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: It's actually a very common emotion for people to feel nervousness and imposter syndrome. Why do you think so many people resonated with that? Like, I guess it just shows up in every aspect of life, no matter what your circumstances.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah, mean, I think, well, I think there's so many layers to it and to that video specifically, one being, I think people resonated with it on a certain level, but I also think that they resonated with just the overarching theme of things looking different than they feel. And like people not necessarily knowing how you feel on the inside and you portraying a different version of that. And so,
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: maybe they couldn't relate to that kind of performance anxiety, like being in front of people, but I think they can relate to like, people think that I have it figured out or maybe I come across like I do, but I don't and I feel anxious internally or I feel like I'm not deserving or whatever it is. ⁓ But I also think that people really, so like when you see us on Fox 29, I think some people would kind of look at us and then feel a separation of like, ⁓ I could never do that. like put themselves, because they know us and they know us, you know, like personally, right? They may put themselves intentionally or unintentionally in our shoes and be like, wow, if that was me doing that, because I am just like them, I would have not been able to perform that way. Or I would have been really nervous. And I think like that projection of them thinking about what it would be like to be in our shoes.
Karli Visconto: Hmm.
Jessica DeRose: also resonates because, I think it was really nice for you to like kind of shed light on, you know, how you were truly feeling. And I think, you know, people resonated with or loved the video because they resonated, but also because like, you don't see that kind of vulnerability. You just don't, you know.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's funny because a lot of my friends and family after I released that video sent me texts being like you would have never known you were nervous and I'm like well then thank God that I said something because again our brand is called only human I never want to be facetious or lead or like mislead somebody because it would be such a missed opportunity to have that shared human experience to show that moment of vulnerability being like I was actually shitting my pants not only just before but
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah, you don't wanna... Yeah.
Karli Visconto: Usually the nerves subside once you start. No, I was shaking. had to hold my hands together because I was like, I am probably visibly on TV shaking like a leaf right now. And so I'm glad that I spoke on it because it's really funny the power of perception and how we're our own harshest critics always. And so I thought it was like so evident the way it was like tripping on my words. I felt like I couldn't really like articulate the way that I typically am able to. Whereas
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ always.
Karli Visconto: other people looking from the outside were like, no, actually you came across really passionate about your brand and confident. And I just thought that's also funny because I had a completely different internal experience than the external world.
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah, it is so hard when, you know, we're the ones that feel it. like, afterwards, maybe we didn't feel good about it, but that's not objectively like how it went. And so it's really hard to kind of like differentiate, like, I don't know, like when you put those two things together, it's hard to get like a real good objective opinion about like how it went. But I also just want to call out like, We totally could have like... just went with it. like, people thought we came across great. And then we could have just been like, great, let them think that like, let them think that that's just how it felt. like, you're so right that that's the only human brand. And that also does not accomplish our mission of helping others feel less alone. But that's not to say that there won't be a day where we're going to walk into something like that. And we're going to be super confident. And we're going to show that side too. We're not going to always be like, whoa, is me like,
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: I have imposter syndrome always, like when there are times of confidence and there are times of like we crush that, then we're gonna say that too. And I think that that's like a beautiful thing to kind of be able to let people in on how you're feeling when it is not great and also when it is, you know.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. It's a great point because you really are gonna show up differently on different days and I think my nerve specifically heading into Fox 29. It was a culmination of a lot of things I've been like extremely overwhelmed and feeling anxious about a lot of different aspects of my life So it showed up that way a little bit more dramatically on Wednesday But you're so right like as we do more of this and maybe when we're in different head spaces and the ebb and flow of just the human experience we are capable of showing up more confidently and that's okay too. It's not going to always be a consistent experience.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, doesn't always have to be that how we felt didn't actually translate to how we came across. So I do want to call out that I was also nervous. I'm kind of letting you have your spotlight here, but I was also nervous.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. See, you did, you, I feel like did a better job at keeping it in check. That's why I'm not giving you, but you were a rock star in my opinion.
Jessica DeRose: No. No, I do want to just call out that I make myself pass out sometimes when I'm nervous. I haven't really recently, but I definitely could have passed out. I was sitting there and there was a little bit of, I don't want to say anticipation or buildup, but we were sitting on the couch probably for three minutes maybe, which felt like an eternity. And then they were sitting on the couch with us for a minute before we started the segment. it's just like, we're watching the news guy Bob Kelly or the weather guy Bob Kelly doing like.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. traffic, I think.
Jessica DeRose: his thing and we're like waiting for it to be our turn. And so like in that few minutes of anticipation, I truly, my heart was racing, it beating out of my chest and I just felt like, just like my mouth was dry and I just literally was saying to myself like, fucking breathe. Like you are going to make your self pass out on live television. Like just breathe. Like you're fine.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. So we actually were having parallel experiences because that's exactly how I felt like my heart again beating out of my chest shaking my mouth went dry I was looking over at Tyler and I'm like I know that we're gonna be on air in approximately 15 seconds But I think I need her to bring over water because I can't even talk right now Let alone I knew I was about to have to like I don't know actually put a Coherent thought together and I was like, I don't even remember my story
Jessica DeRose: No, we were. Yeah. need a... Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I don't remember why we started the Only Human Project. I'll be lucky if I remember my name. Who put me here?
Jessica DeRose: What is the only human project? You were about to say your social security number. That was funny. That was a nice little like we both definitely lightened up like we loosened up a little bit. And yeah I appreciated that. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: loosened up a little bit. Thank God he said that. Because, yeah, we I think we like to lead with levity. I know for me, if I'm ever in uncomfortable situations like that is my personal brand. Like I am somebody who leads with levity and I let other people in on the joke, which is me. Like I make myself the front of the joke. So the fact that he kind of just like was able to have that moment of reprieve from like the seriousness and the build up was really nice. But I'm curious in your head.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: when you are battling imposter syndrome and we can kind of start deviating from like the Fox 29 example or like nervousness, like what is that narrative that is like that you're telling yourself? Like what's that inner negative voice that's winning in that moment?
Jessica DeRose: Wow, that was a hard transition. ⁓ Yeah, like, let's do it. ⁓
Karli Visconto: I'm like enough levity, let's get to the seriousness.
Jessica DeRose: I feel like I have a little bit, well I'm definitely stubborn, but I have a little bit of like stubborn confidence about myself that if I'm feeling imposter syndrome, I don't really allow myself to feel it. Like because I'm like almost stubborn in the fact that like I don't wanna feel like, like I'm just gonna act like I know what I'm doing or I belong or whatever it is. And so I think that like when I do get. when imposter syndrome does come over me, think it's a result of comparison and a result of like, it's not so much focused on me, it's focused on like me in comparison to other people. like, ⁓ this person like, for example, like knows how to like showed up in an outfit that's perfect for this event. They belong here. Or like, you know, they look like they have confidence, like they belong here. And like it,
Karli Visconto: Mm.
Jessica DeRose: that is a reflection of me. Like I'm feeling like I don't belong, but it's not like a narrative that I'm telling myself. It's kind of like, does that make sense? Like I'm projecting how I feel onto other people, not in a negative way, but in a way of like, they seem like they know what they're doing or they seem like they are more confident. It's kind of complex.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, which is funny because it is. Yeah, but essentially you're basing your worth or your inherent belonging based on like somebody else's external image and what they're portraying, which you know everything's a highlight reel. You know from the outside people look like they have it all figured out. But I mean, we have a whole brand around the fact that nobody has it all figured out and they're probably having the same
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, how I compare to all other people in the room. Yeah. ⁓ yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: underlying emotions and experiences, but it doesn't change the fact that that alters how you feel on the inside in your worthiness to be there and capitalize on a certain opportunity.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Do you feel like your experience is different? Is it kind of like cyclical thoughts that you kind of have on repeat? Like, what does that look like for you?
Karli Visconto: Yeah, for me, I guess it really depends. think sometimes when I've experienced imposter syndrome in an environment like work, I just inherently don't feel smart enough and it kind of boils down to not feeling like a subject matter expert, which is why client presentations make me feel nervous and I experience imposter syndrome more in that environment than I would at, let's say, a keynote. speaking engagement at a college where I'm like, no, this is my jam or teaching Pilates in front of a couple hundred people at Seaport Pier. I'm like, I personally identify as a, you know, podcaster now, a mental health podcaster that really shows vulnerability or I really identify as a Pilates instructor and therefore I can step into that role confidently. Whereas work, I have this core belief that I'm not a consultant because I did start my career off in finance and that's something that
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Right. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: you know, my mentors at my firm are always trying to get me to like, release that core belief because they're like, what is a consultant? What is that? What's the definition? And so I think that's definitely one piece of it is like identifying with like the person that you're showing up as. But for me, my nervousness always comes down to like this simple voice in my head that's going to tell or sorry, that's telling me that I'm going to mess up.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: because I think it really boils down to my deep desire for perfection. I've always been a perfectionist and a high achiever. And I think there's part of me that wants to portray that to the world. And I feel like there's an expectation of me to be perfect. And so that's why I've always felt called like with figured out a bullet with the only human project like shed light on the fact that I'm not. But I think my inner voice still hasn't come around to that. It still wants me to be perfect and expects me to be perfect. So.
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: heading into Wednesday, it was like, you're gonna freeze up on air and you're gonna be humiliated in front of everybody and everybody's gonna know that you don't have it all figured out and you're not perfect. And that scares me. Does that make sense?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. It sounds like yours. Yeah. And it sounds like your imposter syndrome seems to stem from more like knowledge based things. So like when you have the knowledge of something, you can step into the confidence of, you know, that thing. And so maybe it's not like.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: this person has more confidence than me and so therefore I don't belong here. It's more like, no, I know my stuff. And so then I can step into the confidence. ⁓ But I'm just curious.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: It's going to come back. ⁓
Karli Visconto: You're good at that when you like lose a thought, you literally just sit on it for a second and you come back. Whereas if it's gone for me, especially if I'm like recording a podcast, I'm like, and again, it's because it's I'm under pressure. If I'm under pressure, literally my mind, which is funny because that's like a reoccurring. I always talk about performance anxiety and feeling pressure around performance. And as an athlete and like a former equity trader, you would think I like operate really well in high pressure environments, but like.
Jessica DeRose: It comes right back. Yeah. Yeah. History has shown. I'm just kidding.
Karli Visconto: That is not true. That is not the case. But for you, you're like put on the spot. You're trying to think of a thought and you're like, and it came right back to me. Unless I'm jinxing you in this moment.
Jessica DeRose: I don't know about that. This is a podcast that like 12 people listen to. So like, don't know if I would call this pressure and two of them are my parents. ⁓ No, okay. think I got it. think it came back. you, I think as humans, just, have this desire to portray perfection to the world and we don't really inherently want to let people in and that's
Karli Visconto: That is sad.
Jessica DeRose: that doesn't feel safe, right? It doesn't feel safe to call out how you're feeling and kind of let people in on the fact that like, you don't have it figured out, right? But obviously we do that here. And I'm curious if that helps you feel better because I'm thinking about people who may have the same tendency of like, I'm just gonna fake it till I make it, but in a way of like, not leading with levity, like just. If people think that I have confidence, then great, I do. And I'm going to let them think that. ⁓ So I'm just curious, I think for those people that feel that way, does it feel better to let people in? Or does it allow you to crumble? Because I think that if you know people know that you're not confident, then they look at you a certain way and think that you're not confident. But I'm just curious.
Karli Visconto: Hmm? Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, it's kind of like a long-winded question, but I'm just curious if it's detrimental because then other people seem to have a different perception of you, or does it make you feel more confident that people know the true feelings that you're feeling?
Karli Visconto: our brains could not be more like interlocked, I swear. I actually was gonna bring this up when we talking about Fox 29 and then I lost the thought and then you just brought it back because such a good point and I think it's situational for me personally. There are times where I do have to really pretend that my imposter syndrome or nerves are not present in order to fake it till I make it and people say that is 95 % of life.
Jessica DeRose: It came to me.
Karli Visconto: because it's mental and it's the narrative that you tell yourself and what you portray to the outside world. So I do think that's a very real tactic that people sometimes lean on in order to get through something because if you're not showing that weakness or that vulnerability, it's almost like it doesn't exist if it can't be perceived by others or your nervous system, right? Just pretending it's not there. However, I do think there's something freeing about letting people in on the fact that
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: you are struggling in some way, shape or form. It's cathartic. It does feel like you are kind of dropping the mask. And that's also why we, yeah, that's why we started the ⁓ first keynote speeches that we did saying we're not public speakers. We are nervous because it allowed the crowd to meet us where we're at. And that was a very liberating feeling. So it's funny, I think.
Jessica DeRose: shedding some weight a little bit.
Karli Visconto: both tactics while completely on the opposite ends of the spectrum can be used in different times. One is a little bit more raw and authentic because you're showing people truly how you're feeling inside. But I think it's almost more self-serving to pretend that it doesn't exist so that you yourself can just like get through the moment by faking it until you make it. Does that make sense?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. No, it does. I do think that, like, the nervous system isn't stupid. Like, I think you're still gonna feel it at some point, ⁓ even if you just pretend that you don't. So, like, that's where I think that, you know, letting people in, maybe it doesn't have to be the world. Maybe it doesn't have to be on live TV. You're saying, hey, I'm nervous, by the way. Maybe it's telling your partner or telling...
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Jessica DeRose: your mom and just being like, I'm feeling really nervous and just allowing yourself to release it. I think that there's so much power in that and I found that so beneficial in other parts of my life because I feel like when we ignore feelings, they never go away. They just get stored for later use and it's probably at a time where you don't want them to come. So I do think that there's, on different scales, like...
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: you maybe don't have to start a keynote speech of 250 people with, I'm really nervous, but letting it out in some other way other than pretending that it's not there, if that makes sense.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, no, absolutely. And just speaking on the nervous system, like it's so funny, obviously, I always talk about like, and like, I do feel like in this modern day, we experience nervousness and, you know, anxiety more than ever before. our nervous system really cannot distinguish between like, I'm nervous about this upcoming presentation or like speaking engagement versus I'm being chased by a lion. And so I've heard of a lot of people using things like beta blockers to make those physical symptoms subside. So even in your head, you might know this is like a very high pressure situation and I need to perform, but your body and your nervousism isn't getting worked up because those physical manifestations are suppressed. So your hands aren't getting sweaty, your heart's not racing, your body's not shaking.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: And I do think that could be a great tool. I know we talk a lot about like holistic health too. And I made a TikTok about like SSRIs that was a little bit controversial and we're always like the biggest proponent of everybody should leverage what makes sense for them. And if that is pharmaceuticals, but with the nervous system, I think it's just interesting to talk about tools like beta blockers that do help some of those physical manifestations like subside.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah.
Karli Visconto: because a lot of times it is stored in the body like you said, and it's not always like the mind, you know what I mean?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, I think that's exactly how I was feeling at Fox 29. Like I kept reminding myself and saying to you too, like we were just talking about us and our story. How many times have we done this? We're sitting down with two people and it's fine. Like, it's the funny thing is, is there's not a live audience of 200 people or however many people were watching. Like that would feel way more nerve wracking. And so, you know, like I think I try to combat those feelings and internal thoughts with like logic, but
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: And I was able to, you know, settle my mind down with logic, but my body was not on board. And so that's where I was like not breathing and I was like a little shaky and my mouth was dry, like things like that. So I definitely do think that it's a good tool, but I also like challenge myself to like, there's also just like, that's not normal, right? Like not that it's not common, but like.
Karli Visconto: Yes. to work yourself up that way.
Jessica DeRose: it's not normal to not be able to self-regulate your nervous system and get your body on the same page as your mind. so, like I said, while it is very common, it's also not normal because we're not being chased by a line. And that is exactly what the nervous system was made for, fight or flight situations. And I think we are just over-leveraging, as a society, our nervous system and those fight or flight chemicals or whatever they're called.
Karli Visconto: Yeah. We're like addicted to them. It really is an addiction. They're turned on more than they're turned off.
Jessica DeRose: And yeah, it's like crazy. Yeah. And so I think it's just like a bigger battle to fight, but yeah.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, and it is total personal preference, but I do agree with you. It's like it in the moment on Fox 29. It was way more in the body than it was in the mind for me, too. I wasn't mentally nervous, but physically I could not tell my body to relax. But I actually I do have medication that was prescribed to me from my doctor. This was probably like six to eight months ago at this point, and I've only used it once for a client presentation and I looked at it the morning of Fox 29 and.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I chose not to take it. I guess for a couple of reasons, like I do try to be as holistic as possible, but I also wanted to face my fears head on because I think there's this notion that you only do things when you're not scared of them. And if I could count the amount of times that I've been terrified and had to do something anyway. And so I kind of made that conscious decision that morning that I was going to just raw dog it. And I was like, you know what? No, fuck that.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: I'm gonna face this head on and I did. Was it ideal? No. Did it go as good as it could have went? No. But that to me was more important than letting my anxiety or imposter syndrome win.
Jessica DeRose: But you did it. Yeah. And I like, I think some people would feel like that statement is a little harsh, but I truly do believe that that's the case. And it's not like, I don't know, I'm trying to be like sensitive, but I just really do think that that is like, in that situation specifically, that is letting that win because it isn't a situation where you are.
Karli Visconto: I know.
Jessica DeRose: like fighting for your life and like not able to like function normally. Like it's just nervousness, right? Like nervousness is normal, but like the next time we do something, if you take the medication and you did it for FOX 29, then it's like, okay, well then now I have to do without it. So it's like, once you can do the hard thing first, then the rest is easier. But I feel like that just over like further complicates it because then How much more nervous would you be next time when you're like, I don't want to take it, but now I know I did well and now I know I'm going to do worse because I won't have it. Does that make sense? It's just like.
Karli Visconto: Exactly. Yes, it's like a reliance or this fundamental belief that that thing allowed you to show up and have success. Yes. And that was exactly what I was going to say. Would it have been easier for me to take that pill and go on to Fox 29 and feel better for that day? Yes. But for me, one thing I always pride myself on, I'm always thinking about the long game.
Jessica DeRose: That was the thing that helped you to do it. Yes. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I'm always thinking about future me and I think in a society that loves instant gratification, I try to go against the grain in that regard and be like, no, I want to make the investment. And so I want to get better at handling high pressure situations. I want to normalize feeling the fear and doing it anyway and facing it head on. And so I know that it's going to take a while to work up to that point where I do feel truly inherently confident going into a situation like that.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: But guess what? I'm not gonna reach that point if I continuously am using a crutch or a, you know, like the training wheels. And so not gonna say that that's everybody's tactic, but for me, I know that I wanna get to that point. And so I gotta feel the pain a little bit for a little while.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah, and I think that's really fair and I think you're talking about it very nicely in saying that like that's just like your preference and that's not like a prescription or you know the right way but I think like whatever we do we have to feel good in our own mind and body and so like for you that decision felt the best that day and so that's what it is. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: 100%. Yeah, because it's all about confidence, right? And like, I want to feel confident that I can do something on my own with my body, with my mind, and with that true internal belief. Yes. Yeah. And that's exactly. And that's a personal preference. ⁓ I think just kind of like wrap it up. We've talked a lot about specifically the most recent example of Fox 29, but this can apply
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Because it's supposed to work that way. Yeah. Yeah. That is how the body is meant to work. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: to so many things in life. It looks different for every single person. It can be giving that presentation at work. It can be, you know, meeting a new group of friends for the first time. Like it really does. It can, it can. Do we feel like we have any like tangible pieces of advice or just like thoughts to kind of keep front of mind to just help people approach situations like this and a little bit more of like
Jessica DeRose: It can be calling to order takeout on the phone. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: calm mannered way and navigate them in the moment.
Jessica DeRose: I think personally, I mean, it doesn't, it's not a perfect strategy, but I think with practice it will be. I personally like to combat my intrusive thoughts, you could say with logic and, ⁓ I, this is probably why I'm good at regaining my train of thought because I lose it so often. Like, I don't know why, like, you know when Michael Scott goes, I just sometimes I just start a sentence and I don't know where it's gonna go. Um.
Karli Visconto: Practice makes perfect. No, literally me every time I open my mouth, I'm like, where are we gonna go today? That's the scary part.
Jessica DeRose: Where are we gonna land here? ⁓
Karli Visconto: What were you even just saying?
Jessica DeRose: Were listening? No, I was saying that I try to combat my intrusive thoughts with logic and I also, ⁓ okay, I got it, I got it. So, okay, I try to combat, I'm back online. Why, have I missed out? Hot spot was lagging. ⁓ If we edited this podcast, it'd be so much better. Remember when we used to cut out all of the pauses and the ums and the way that I lost my thought?
Karli Visconto: She's back. Her hotspot just dipped for a second.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, not anymore. You guys are sticking, you're along for the ride. No, right. ⁓ So, okay, so I try to combat my thoughts with logic and then I also try to...
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. That wasn't human enough for us. She's gone again. What the hell is going on over there?
Jessica DeRose: I'm gone. No. I keep getting distracted by like talking.
Karli Visconto: Okay, do you me to go?
Jessica DeRose: or you go.
Karli Visconto: I'm sorry. Well, I'm like, I'll go. I don't have any tips, but I do feel like sometimes maybe reframing anxiety as excitement in the body can also just be a good reframe because I think when we associate it with bad or negative emotion or wrong, it tends to just spiral a little bit. And if there's one thing, it doesn't feel good and you feel bad for it. And if there's one thing about me, I feel like there's always a domino effect.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, it doesn't feel good.
Karli Visconto: And so just that initial thought and that initial reframe can really help turn something negative into positive. And then this is a little bit of like just tough love advice. And we've already really talked about this, but like lean in to the things that scare you because you know what's even more scary? Avoiding them and never being able to face them head on. And I think sometimes we make things really, really big in our head the more that we shy away from them. So for example, if there's a really tough conversation that you know you need to have in life.
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: And it's been weeks now and you just keep pushing it off, pushing it off and pushing it off. Every time you do that, it's just growing bigger and bigger and bigger in your head. And so I love like, again, counting to three and just doing it where it doesn't apply to that situation, like just making the decision or setting a specific date where you are going to execute on that thing that you've been avoiding because you're feeling the fear. So I really just think it's with all things, repetition will kind of.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah.
Karli Visconto: take the scariness out of it eventually and just having full confidence that you will reach a point where you are doing the thing and you're feeling comfortable and worthy of doing it.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. And I feel like- with anxiety, like anxiety is actually a very normal feeling. And that's why, you know, we have it for a reason, right? We have it so that we remember our keys or we look both ways before crossing the street. And like, there is a purpose to it, but I think that we can very easily confuse like what it's supposed to be used for. And so I do love the idea of like reframing it a little bit because it can be an anxious, excited.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: Right? like, sometimes you're anxious because you just want to do the best that you can, or you just want to perform the best. so, yeah. And that's where, like, I think I'm kind of going with, like, reframing with logic. I, so the other thing that I was going to say was, reframing with logic along, alongside calling out your feelings. So like being like, I'll talk to myself and be like, I'm feeling super anxious right now.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, you care.
Jessica DeRose: but it's because I just want to do the best. And that's okay, that's fair. And I can want that for myself, but I don't have to get really crazy anxious and not sleep over it, right? Like, and kind of just like have a little conversation with myself, bringing myself down to like earth a little bit, just being like, I hear you, I hear you body that you are trying to like help me. And that's really what it is, right? Like, I don't know if you've ever seen the movie Inside Out, but like,
Karli Visconto: Yeah.
Jessica DeRose: anxiety and all of our emotions are just trying to help and so acknowledging them and being like, hey, I see you, I see you, I know that you want me to do the best that I can and that's why you're here, but I don't need you, like I'm good and we're gonna be okay. So yeah, if you haven't watched that, I feel like you should. Yeah, it is and like I think when we acknowledge things like instead of just trying to ignore them or trying not to feel that way,
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. I love that. It's really a choice.
Jessica DeRose: in my experience, then that has allowed me to put those emotions away. It's not a perfect plan, but I think it helps me talk myself off the ledge a lot when I can say, like, I see you, but like, we're good. Like, we can stand down, you know?
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm Yeah, I love that. I really do I think that's a great place to end and I know we have Two more things to get through with this little podcast episode first of them being our only human moments Which I'm still in my head going back and forth between which one I'm gonna say But you could go first and then I'll decide and go next
Jessica DeRose: Yes. Okay, well people might already know of mine because I made a TikTok about it, but it's a little relevant. I burnt my forehead with my curling iron the night before we went on live TV. It's not terrible, but it was definitely a lot more red and I have never done that before. I I've burnt my neck a couple of times with a straightener, but like, you know, you can just hide that with your hair. No, this is just straight on my forehead. I think you can probably see it a little bit if you're looking for it, but thankfully it wasn't like crazy noticeable, but I was just like. And it wasn't even being careless. Like sometimes I do stupid things like that, cause I'm just like rough and like careless kind of. I don't have like spatial awareness. Like I bump into things all the time, but yeah, that was just, I don't know. That was just dress coded.
Karli Visconto: Day before going on live TV. I know it was not noticeable though, honestly All right, I'll guess I'll stay with the theme of heat and fire because Why not? not? ⁓ So I was at someone's house. We're making dinner. They were outside I was in the kitchen I was just like tossing the sale and this was actually the day we did Fox when I was Wednesday So we had gotten up at 430. I had been also running on fumes for like weeks now and
Jessica DeRose: Thank you. All right, what's your only human moment? What do we decide on? ⁓ exhausted. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I actually had probably 100 only human moments in that day alone. But this one specifically, there were sweet potatoes and broccoli in the oven. All of a sudden, the oven's like on fire. He comes in, he's like, the oven's on fire. I'm literally next to the oven. I'm like, what? Like, didn't smell it, didn't notice it. I'm like, what oven? What? And literally like...
Jessica DeRose: Hmm, didn't notice. You sure?
Karli Visconto: It wasn't up in flames yet. there it was fire. It put the whole oven in it, like go up in flames. Like he called it. I don't know. Honestly, maybe this was less only human of me and like superhuman of him. I'm like, how did you detect that from outside? Because he's like, I smelled it. I sensed it. But I was like completely oblivious just in my own world tossing the salad. So don't count on me to detect or put out a fire, that's for sure. ⁓
Jessica DeRose: ⁓ my god. Yeah, probably thinking about Fox 29. ⁓ god, you need to like stick a fire detector to you or smoke detector to you at all times to keep you safe.
Karli Visconto: No, literally. Yeah, so I guess that was my only human. But I also, when we were leaving for Fox 29, thought I left my curler on, made aunt go back, and then it was off all along. So like, I'm just an overall ditz right now. Yeah, I'm just one big fat human right now.
Jessica DeRose: That is very old-y. Same. same. Only human moment.
Karli Visconto: ⁓ my gosh. Well, this is gonna be our last episode for a little while.
Jessica DeRose: The end of season two if anything Yeah, I was gonna say if anything where you can count us in for abrupt endings And by the way, this is the last you'll hear from
Karli Visconto: Coming to a close. And we're done. Bye.
Jessica DeRose: ⁓ I feel like we're just, with the summer coming up, we have a lot of exciting things going on, especially with in-person events, and I feel like we're feeling very fulfilled from in-person human connection, which is obviously our main goal anyway, but we're just gonna take some time to really lean into that, really lean into the community and face-to-face interaction.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, that's where the excitement is. feel like that's where, you know, people seem to really be like leaning in. And I think only human when we see people in person, they're like, ⁓ you guys hosted the Pilates event or like I see that as like they're never like, ⁓ the podcast. Yeah. And like heading into the summer season where we'll both be down the shore, there's so much opportunity to just put more time and energy there and just really nurture that and like making those in-person connections great.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Mm-hmm. It's never like the podcasters.
Karli Visconto: And so, yeah, we're just taking a break. It's the close of season two. We will, you know, stay in touch about like what season three looks like, when it's coming out, if it's coming out. But for now, I think we just need to kind of water where we think there's the most potential to grow. And that is in person and not digitally.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, definitely. Yeah. Yeah. Who would have known?
Karli Visconto: who would have known us kind of all along. But like, it does feel weird not releasing something every single week. That's why we do the podcast. It's nice to have a consistent product out there, but there's just so many podcasts out there. yeah, paradox of choice. But all right.
Jessica DeRose: I know. Yeah. Yeah. I know there are a lot to choose from. So, yeah. All right, we'll see you next season. Maybe we'll be back in the studio. Maybe we'll be podcasting from Florida. Who knows?
Karli Visconto: We'll see you when we see you. Yeah, but what we do know, we will be down the shore a lot. We have a lot of Pilates events coming up at Seaport Pier. We're gonna be really leaning into like a whole little like shore aesthetic with journaling sessions on the beach, ice cream runs, group community walks along the water. Like we're really gonna, you know, get excited and do some things in North Whitewood, New Jersey. So definitely stay tuned.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. There will be no shortage of only human. Don't worry about that. You'll still see us all over your Instagram.
Karli Visconto: Yeah. Amazing. especially with our brand new social media hire who is knocking it out of the park. But alright, thank you guys for listening. Bye.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Alright. Bye!
Jessica DeRose: Hello! On today's game of Where's Jess?
Karli Visconto: So funny, because you play this game when it comes to the podcast. And then I play this game when it comes to work. My coworkers are always like, you're always in a different house, always in a different room. So you get to play this role on the podcast. And today she is reporting live from.
Jessica DeRose: ⁓ yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ant's Ant's truck. It's nice and roomy. Yeah, we're going to run some errands after, but I came with him to his physical therapy appointment, but I am sitting in the car, podcasting.
Karli Visconto: You just said you're at PT with him? Whoever said podcasts have any bounds? You can do it anytime, anywhere.
Jessica DeRose: Now I know, right? Could be, anyway. I mean, listen, I did it from Costa Rica. I think I can do it from the parking lot of PT, you know? But funnily enough, I'm on a hotspot right now. You should actually see my setup. It's kind of hilarious. I think I need to take a picture of it. Like, what my setup looks like right now. I have a podcast microphone in a car, like, and somehow the quality, like, usually Carly and I have to troubleshoot prior to every podcast, like when I'm on Wi-Fi at home. But today, seamless.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, please do.
Jessica DeRose: And I'm literally plugged into my computer charger is plugged into his truck. Like I have a tripod.
Karli Visconto: All right, let's not get so cocky so soon in the podcast. Just want to call it out. There's still a lot of like slow your roll. For all I know, your laptop will die in 20 minutes because it loses batteries so quickly. So let's just pump the brakes. Be grateful that we're off to a smooth start. It is so funny, though, like you have a lot of faith in that hot spot. I will say that.
Jessica DeRose: No, seriously, I know, I know. This is so funny. It's about now I know. Yeah, this is true. I really do. I was like, you know what? I'm just going to do it. Full send.
Karli Visconto: Well, my laptop is situated on top of a laundry basket right now. So a girl that gets it done both you and me
Jessica DeRose: Wait, I feel like you should take a picture of your setup and we'll, yeah, yeah. It honestly is so funny and that's, well, I guess I'm getting a little ahead of myself about what we did this week or last week at this point. ⁓ But it is cool to see the behind the scenes, because you just see this, but what I'm looking at right now is just hilarious. And so yeah, think knowing that your laptop is on a laundry basket and like.
Karli Visconto: My POV and yours, okay. Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: seeing what you're looking at is just so cool. People just love the behind the scenes, I feel like. And so do I.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, I was just gonna say so do I too. I'm always so curious about that. And I think it just also showcases like nothing is as polished as it seems. Like the things that people do just to make things work, like you always think like the product, I mean, for this podcast specifically, we intentionally took it away from the studio so that it did have more of like an only human girl chat feel to it. And actually just yesterday somebody was like, I've been loving the vibe of season two. Like it really does just feel like I'm listening in on my friends. ⁓
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. ⁓ my god, so true.
Karli Visconto: But I think when you do see the behind the scenes, you got to just see the moments that aren't portrayed and aren't part of the highlight reel. And I think it just really encourages people to just do the thing, even if it doesn't look perfect, because the things that look perfect never are anyway, you know?
Jessica DeRose: Yes. Oh, for sure. That just reminds me of, you know, when people take a picture of their kitchen. And this is very specific, but like they'll take a picture of their kitchen and then really it's like all the stuff that was on the counter is on the floor behind the island. And like you can't see all of those things, but it really just like, I mean, yeah, the behind the scenes and that's why I love doing it. And I want to start vlogging, like all of our experiences and stuff, because it's so good and so only human coded to let people in on the fact that none of this is perfect. And just like your video from Fox 29, maybe it looked a certain way, but it didn't feel that way. And so I think it's such a good point to say when people are thinking about doing something or thinking about, oh, I don't have everything in line, or it's not perfect, or I need this perfect thing, it never is and it very rarely will be. So I love it.
Karli Visconto: That's like literally so on brand with what we're gonna talk about today too, which we didn't even plan this, but before we get into the actual topic, which we're gonna talk about imposter syndrome mainly, think it would be, I almost said cute. I think it would be cute. I think it would be cool to just quickly recap Fox 29, because we were on last Wednesday, right? And we're recording this Friday morning. It comes out on Monday, just to give everybody a little timeline.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. cute. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: But that was a big deal. mean, live TV is no joke. And I don't think I really understood the nature of the beast until I was in that moment, which is why it felt like such a heightened moment. And I had so much pressure, but how did you feel? How did you think it went?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't know, because we were on live TV before, so I'm having a hard time associating it with live TV. I think it was just the fact that I knew that Fox 29 was a really big deal. And not that Positively Philly wasn't a big deal. It was, but it just felt like I had never heard of Positively Philly before. I'd never watched it. I don't know anyone that watched it. it just felt a little bit.
Karli Visconto: It was a bigger scale.
Jessica DeRose: bit less tangible, I guess. so knowing that Fox 29 is actually a really big freaking deal and the anchors are no freaking joke. Alex has won Emmys. That was just, I think, set the stage for a little bit more nerves and a little bit more of worry, I guess.
Karli Visconto: I totally agree. It definitely had like a different feel to it. And when we went into Positively Philly, I think we were like, just a little bit more naive. And also, the hosts are just two girls that are our own age. And it just felt like very conversational and what we do on the podcast every single day. Fox 29 definitely had like a different feel to it in a really good way. And I think like these opportunities are things that we're gonna need to get comfortable with. every single rep we can get like
Jessica DeRose: Just like yeah, yeah, totally ⁓ yeah.
Karli Visconto: willing to take and it's good practice, but it doesn't change the fact that it felt really scary. We also like we're marketing it a little bit and to me when we post on our socials both on Only Human and like our personal, hey we're gonna be on Fox 29 tomorrow, 730, tune in. That's now all I'm thinking about. Everybody tuning in because if we didn't tell anybody and it was like a little bit of a surprise I think I would have been like, all right this is just kind of
Jessica DeRose: That's what it, yeah. is that.
Karli Visconto: and unassuming, like some people will see it, some people won't. But the fact that we were like kind of blasting it out there, I was really, really nervous going into it.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, yeah. What do you think? So it sounds like, and this is not like a new thing. I think this has a lot of translation into posting on social media. But what do you think it is about friends and family seeing it that makes it more scary than just strangers? Because I think like sometimes those feelings are a little bit backwards, that makes sense. Like these are the people that know you the best, that love you the most and support you. And so
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: I think that they are going to be the least judgmental people. And so what about that, if you can call it out, makes it the most scary?
Karli Visconto: Such a good question, such a good question. I feel like maybe two things. The first thing that comes to my mind is because we care more about their opinions, because we value them as an individual, we love them and so we care. But two, if we do have this moment of failure or embarrassment, we have to face them more often, whereas strangers will never come into contact with them.
Jessica DeRose: That's fair. Yeah, that's fair. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: And so it's like, whatever, whatever they experienced, the version of me that they know or think they know doesn't apply, doesn't really impact me. But if we are like humiliated on live TV and our friends and family see it, then we're talking about it. Then they have that in their back of their head every time they see us. I think that's probably what it boils down to, at least for me.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I could see that. I feel like that's also how it goes with posting on social media and TikTok and stuff. I don't know. I'd rather a million strangers see my TikTok than one person that I know. So yeah.
Karli Visconto: No, nothing is more mortifying than seeing somebody in person and then being like, oh my God, your TikToks up on my for you page. I'm like, and no they don't, that's not me. Keep scrolling. It is funny though, I didn't expect a lot of people to resonate with that video I put up about how I was feeling going into Fox 29 and throughout that whole segment. And I think it just really sheds light on the fact that I am not alone in dealing with this.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, you're like, mm. No, thank you. ⁓ Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: It's actually a very common emotion for people to feel nervousness and imposter syndrome. Why do you think so many people resonated with that? Like, I guess it just shows up in every aspect of life, no matter what your circumstances.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah, mean, I think, well, I think there's so many layers to it and to that video specifically, one being, I think people resonated with it on a certain level, but I also think that they resonated with just the overarching theme of things looking different than they feel. And like people not necessarily knowing how you feel on the inside and you portraying a different version of that. And so,
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: maybe they couldn't relate to that kind of performance anxiety, like being in front of people, but I think they can relate to like, people think that I have it figured out or maybe I come across like I do, but I don't and I feel anxious internally or I feel like I'm not deserving or whatever it is. ⁓ But I also think that people really, so like when you see us on Fox 29, I think some people would kind of look at us and then feel a separation of like, ⁓ I could never do that. like put themselves, because they know us and they know us, you know, like personally, right? They may put themselves intentionally or unintentionally in our shoes and be like, wow, if that was me doing that, because I am just like them, I would have not been able to perform that way. Or I would have been really nervous. And I think like that projection of them thinking about what it would be like to be in our shoes.
Karli Visconto: Hmm.
Jessica DeRose: also resonates because, I think it was really nice for you to like kind of shed light on, you know, how you were truly feeling. And I think, you know, people resonated with or loved the video because they resonated, but also because like, you don't see that kind of vulnerability. You just don't, you know.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's funny because a lot of my friends and family after I released that video sent me texts being like you would have never known you were nervous and I'm like well then thank God that I said something because again our brand is called only human I never want to be facetious or lead or like mislead somebody because it would be such a missed opportunity to have that shared human experience to show that moment of vulnerability being like I was actually shitting my pants not only just before but
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah, you don't wanna... Yeah.
Karli Visconto: Usually the nerves subside once you start. No, I was shaking. had to hold my hands together because I was like, I am probably visibly on TV shaking like a leaf right now. And so I'm glad that I spoke on it because it's really funny the power of perception and how we're our own harshest critics always. And so I thought it was like so evident the way it was like tripping on my words. I felt like I couldn't really like articulate the way that I typically am able to. Whereas
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ always.
Karli Visconto: other people looking from the outside were like, no, actually you came across really passionate about your brand and confident. And I just thought that's also funny because I had a completely different internal experience than the external world.
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah, it is so hard when, you know, we're the ones that feel it. like, afterwards, maybe we didn't feel good about it, but that's not objectively like how it went. And so it's really hard to kind of like differentiate, like, I don't know, like when you put those two things together, it's hard to get like a real good objective opinion about like how it went. But I also just want to call out like, We totally could have like... just went with it. like, people thought we came across great. And then we could have just been like, great, let them think that like, let them think that that's just how it felt. like, you're so right that that's the only human brand. And that also does not accomplish our mission of helping others feel less alone. But that's not to say that there won't be a day where we're going to walk into something like that. And we're going to be super confident. And we're going to show that side too. We're not going to always be like, whoa, is me like,
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: I have imposter syndrome always, like when there are times of confidence and there are times of like we crush that, then we're gonna say that too. And I think that that's like a beautiful thing to kind of be able to let people in on how you're feeling when it is not great and also when it is, you know.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. It's a great point because you really are gonna show up differently on different days and I think my nerve specifically heading into Fox 29. It was a culmination of a lot of things I've been like extremely overwhelmed and feeling anxious about a lot of different aspects of my life So it showed up that way a little bit more dramatically on Wednesday But you're so right like as we do more of this and maybe when we're in different head spaces and the ebb and flow of just the human experience we are capable of showing up more confidently and that's okay too. It's not going to always be a consistent experience.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, doesn't always have to be that how we felt didn't actually translate to how we came across. So I do want to call out that I was also nervous. I'm kind of letting you have your spotlight here, but I was also nervous.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. See, you did, you, I feel like did a better job at keeping it in check. That's why I'm not giving you, but you were a rock star in my opinion.
Jessica DeRose: No. No, I do want to just call out that I make myself pass out sometimes when I'm nervous. I haven't really recently, but I definitely could have passed out. I was sitting there and there was a little bit of, I don't want to say anticipation or buildup, but we were sitting on the couch probably for three minutes maybe, which felt like an eternity. And then they were sitting on the couch with us for a minute before we started the segment. it's just like, we're watching the news guy Bob Kelly or the weather guy Bob Kelly doing like.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. traffic, I think.
Jessica DeRose: his thing and we're like waiting for it to be our turn. And so like in that few minutes of anticipation, I truly, my heart was racing, it beating out of my chest and I just felt like, just like my mouth was dry and I just literally was saying to myself like, fucking breathe. Like you are going to make your self pass out on live television. Like just breathe. Like you're fine.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. So we actually were having parallel experiences because that's exactly how I felt like my heart again beating out of my chest shaking my mouth went dry I was looking over at Tyler and I'm like I know that we're gonna be on air in approximately 15 seconds But I think I need her to bring over water because I can't even talk right now Let alone I knew I was about to have to like I don't know actually put a Coherent thought together and I was like, I don't even remember my story
Jessica DeRose: No, we were. Yeah. need a... Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I don't remember why we started the Only Human Project. I'll be lucky if I remember my name. Who put me here?
Jessica DeRose: What is the only human project? You were about to say your social security number. That was funny. That was a nice little like we both definitely lightened up like we loosened up a little bit. And yeah I appreciated that. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: loosened up a little bit. Thank God he said that. Because, yeah, we I think we like to lead with levity. I know for me, if I'm ever in uncomfortable situations like that is my personal brand. Like I am somebody who leads with levity and I let other people in on the joke, which is me. Like I make myself the front of the joke. So the fact that he kind of just like was able to have that moment of reprieve from like the seriousness and the build up was really nice. But I'm curious in your head.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: when you are battling imposter syndrome and we can kind of start deviating from like the Fox 29 example or like nervousness, like what is that narrative that is like that you're telling yourself? Like what's that inner negative voice that's winning in that moment?
Jessica DeRose: Wow, that was a hard transition. ⁓ Yeah, like, let's do it. ⁓
Karli Visconto: I'm like enough levity, let's get to the seriousness.
Jessica DeRose: I feel like I have a little bit, well I'm definitely stubborn, but I have a little bit of like stubborn confidence about myself that if I'm feeling imposter syndrome, I don't really allow myself to feel it. Like because I'm like almost stubborn in the fact that like I don't wanna feel like, like I'm just gonna act like I know what I'm doing or I belong or whatever it is. And so I think that like when I do get. when imposter syndrome does come over me, think it's a result of comparison and a result of like, it's not so much focused on me, it's focused on like me in comparison to other people. like, ⁓ this person like, for example, like knows how to like showed up in an outfit that's perfect for this event. They belong here. Or like, you know, they look like they have confidence, like they belong here. And like it,
Karli Visconto: Mm.
Jessica DeRose: that is a reflection of me. Like I'm feeling like I don't belong, but it's not like a narrative that I'm telling myself. It's kind of like, does that make sense? Like I'm projecting how I feel onto other people, not in a negative way, but in a way of like, they seem like they know what they're doing or they seem like they are more confident. It's kind of complex.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, which is funny because it is. Yeah, but essentially you're basing your worth or your inherent belonging based on like somebody else's external image and what they're portraying, which you know everything's a highlight reel. You know from the outside people look like they have it all figured out. But I mean, we have a whole brand around the fact that nobody has it all figured out and they're probably having the same
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, how I compare to all other people in the room. Yeah. ⁓ yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: underlying emotions and experiences, but it doesn't change the fact that that alters how you feel on the inside in your worthiness to be there and capitalize on a certain opportunity.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Do you feel like your experience is different? Is it kind of like cyclical thoughts that you kind of have on repeat? Like, what does that look like for you?
Karli Visconto: Yeah, for me, I guess it really depends. think sometimes when I've experienced imposter syndrome in an environment like work, I just inherently don't feel smart enough and it kind of boils down to not feeling like a subject matter expert, which is why client presentations make me feel nervous and I experience imposter syndrome more in that environment than I would at, let's say, a keynote. speaking engagement at a college where I'm like, no, this is my jam or teaching Pilates in front of a couple hundred people at Seaport Pier. I'm like, I personally identify as a, you know, podcaster now, a mental health podcaster that really shows vulnerability or I really identify as a Pilates instructor and therefore I can step into that role confidently. Whereas work, I have this core belief that I'm not a consultant because I did start my career off in finance and that's something that
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Right. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: you know, my mentors at my firm are always trying to get me to like, release that core belief because they're like, what is a consultant? What is that? What's the definition? And so I think that's definitely one piece of it is like identifying with like the person that you're showing up as. But for me, my nervousness always comes down to like this simple voice in my head that's going to tell or sorry, that's telling me that I'm going to mess up.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: because I think it really boils down to my deep desire for perfection. I've always been a perfectionist and a high achiever. And I think there's part of me that wants to portray that to the world. And I feel like there's an expectation of me to be perfect. And so that's why I've always felt called like with figured out a bullet with the only human project like shed light on the fact that I'm not. But I think my inner voice still hasn't come around to that. It still wants me to be perfect and expects me to be perfect. So.
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: heading into Wednesday, it was like, you're gonna freeze up on air and you're gonna be humiliated in front of everybody and everybody's gonna know that you don't have it all figured out and you're not perfect. And that scares me. Does that make sense?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. It sounds like yours. Yeah. And it sounds like your imposter syndrome seems to stem from more like knowledge based things. So like when you have the knowledge of something, you can step into the confidence of, you know, that thing. And so maybe it's not like.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: this person has more confidence than me and so therefore I don't belong here. It's more like, no, I know my stuff. And so then I can step into the confidence. ⁓ But I'm just curious.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: It's going to come back. ⁓
Karli Visconto: You're good at that when you like lose a thought, you literally just sit on it for a second and you come back. Whereas if it's gone for me, especially if I'm like recording a podcast, I'm like, and again, it's because it's I'm under pressure. If I'm under pressure, literally my mind, which is funny because that's like a reoccurring. I always talk about performance anxiety and feeling pressure around performance. And as an athlete and like a former equity trader, you would think I like operate really well in high pressure environments, but like.
Jessica DeRose: It comes right back. Yeah. Yeah. History has shown. I'm just kidding.
Karli Visconto: That is not true. That is not the case. But for you, you're like put on the spot. You're trying to think of a thought and you're like, and it came right back to me. Unless I'm jinxing you in this moment.
Jessica DeRose: I don't know about that. This is a podcast that like 12 people listen to. So like, don't know if I would call this pressure and two of them are my parents. ⁓ No, okay. think I got it. think it came back. you, I think as humans, just, have this desire to portray perfection to the world and we don't really inherently want to let people in and that's
Karli Visconto: That is sad.
Jessica DeRose: that doesn't feel safe, right? It doesn't feel safe to call out how you're feeling and kind of let people in on the fact that like, you don't have it figured out, right? But obviously we do that here. And I'm curious if that helps you feel better because I'm thinking about people who may have the same tendency of like, I'm just gonna fake it till I make it, but in a way of like, not leading with levity, like just. If people think that I have confidence, then great, I do. And I'm going to let them think that. ⁓ So I'm just curious, I think for those people that feel that way, does it feel better to let people in? Or does it allow you to crumble? Because I think that if you know people know that you're not confident, then they look at you a certain way and think that you're not confident. But I'm just curious.
Karli Visconto: Hmm? Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, it's kind of like a long-winded question, but I'm just curious if it's detrimental because then other people seem to have a different perception of you, or does it make you feel more confident that people know the true feelings that you're feeling?
Karli Visconto: our brains could not be more like interlocked, I swear. I actually was gonna bring this up when we talking about Fox 29 and then I lost the thought and then you just brought it back because such a good point and I think it's situational for me personally. There are times where I do have to really pretend that my imposter syndrome or nerves are not present in order to fake it till I make it and people say that is 95 % of life.
Jessica DeRose: It came to me.
Karli Visconto: because it's mental and it's the narrative that you tell yourself and what you portray to the outside world. So I do think that's a very real tactic that people sometimes lean on in order to get through something because if you're not showing that weakness or that vulnerability, it's almost like it doesn't exist if it can't be perceived by others or your nervous system, right? Just pretending it's not there. However, I do think there's something freeing about letting people in on the fact that
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: you are struggling in some way, shape or form. It's cathartic. It does feel like you are kind of dropping the mask. And that's also why we, yeah, that's why we started the ⁓ first keynote speeches that we did saying we're not public speakers. We are nervous because it allowed the crowd to meet us where we're at. And that was a very liberating feeling. So it's funny, I think.
Jessica DeRose: shedding some weight a little bit.
Karli Visconto: both tactics while completely on the opposite ends of the spectrum can be used in different times. One is a little bit more raw and authentic because you're showing people truly how you're feeling inside. But I think it's almost more self-serving to pretend that it doesn't exist so that you yourself can just like get through the moment by faking it until you make it. Does that make sense?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. No, it does. I do think that, like, the nervous system isn't stupid. Like, I think you're still gonna feel it at some point, ⁓ even if you just pretend that you don't. So, like, that's where I think that, you know, letting people in, maybe it doesn't have to be the world. Maybe it doesn't have to be on live TV. You're saying, hey, I'm nervous, by the way. Maybe it's telling your partner or telling...
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Jessica DeRose: your mom and just being like, I'm feeling really nervous and just allowing yourself to release it. I think that there's so much power in that and I found that so beneficial in other parts of my life because I feel like when we ignore feelings, they never go away. They just get stored for later use and it's probably at a time where you don't want them to come. So I do think that there's, on different scales, like...
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: you maybe don't have to start a keynote speech of 250 people with, I'm really nervous, but letting it out in some other way other than pretending that it's not there, if that makes sense.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, no, absolutely. And just speaking on the nervous system, like it's so funny, obviously, I always talk about like, and like, I do feel like in this modern day, we experience nervousness and, you know, anxiety more than ever before. our nervous system really cannot distinguish between like, I'm nervous about this upcoming presentation or like speaking engagement versus I'm being chased by a lion. And so I've heard of a lot of people using things like beta blockers to make those physical symptoms subside. So even in your head, you might know this is like a very high pressure situation and I need to perform, but your body and your nervousism isn't getting worked up because those physical manifestations are suppressed. So your hands aren't getting sweaty, your heart's not racing, your body's not shaking.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: And I do think that could be a great tool. I know we talk a lot about like holistic health too. And I made a TikTok about like SSRIs that was a little bit controversial and we're always like the biggest proponent of everybody should leverage what makes sense for them. And if that is pharmaceuticals, but with the nervous system, I think it's just interesting to talk about tools like beta blockers that do help some of those physical manifestations like subside.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah.
Karli Visconto: because a lot of times it is stored in the body like you said, and it's not always like the mind, you know what I mean?
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, I think that's exactly how I was feeling at Fox 29. Like I kept reminding myself and saying to you too, like we were just talking about us and our story. How many times have we done this? We're sitting down with two people and it's fine. Like, it's the funny thing is, is there's not a live audience of 200 people or however many people were watching. Like that would feel way more nerve wracking. And so, you know, like I think I try to combat those feelings and internal thoughts with like logic, but
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: And I was able to, you know, settle my mind down with logic, but my body was not on board. And so that's where I was like not breathing and I was like a little shaky and my mouth was dry, like things like that. So I definitely do think that it's a good tool, but I also like challenge myself to like, there's also just like, that's not normal, right? Like not that it's not common, but like.
Karli Visconto: Yes. to work yourself up that way.
Jessica DeRose: it's not normal to not be able to self-regulate your nervous system and get your body on the same page as your mind. so, like I said, while it is very common, it's also not normal because we're not being chased by a line. And that is exactly what the nervous system was made for, fight or flight situations. And I think we are just over-leveraging, as a society, our nervous system and those fight or flight chemicals or whatever they're called.
Karli Visconto: Yeah. We're like addicted to them. It really is an addiction. They're turned on more than they're turned off.
Jessica DeRose: And yeah, it's like crazy. Yeah. And so I think it's just like a bigger battle to fight, but yeah.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, and it is total personal preference, but I do agree with you. It's like it in the moment on Fox 29. It was way more in the body than it was in the mind for me, too. I wasn't mentally nervous, but physically I could not tell my body to relax. But I actually I do have medication that was prescribed to me from my doctor. This was probably like six to eight months ago at this point, and I've only used it once for a client presentation and I looked at it the morning of Fox 29 and.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I chose not to take it. I guess for a couple of reasons, like I do try to be as holistic as possible, but I also wanted to face my fears head on because I think there's this notion that you only do things when you're not scared of them. And if I could count the amount of times that I've been terrified and had to do something anyway. And so I kind of made that conscious decision that morning that I was going to just raw dog it. And I was like, you know what? No, fuck that.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: I'm gonna face this head on and I did. Was it ideal? No. Did it go as good as it could have went? No. But that to me was more important than letting my anxiety or imposter syndrome win.
Jessica DeRose: But you did it. Yeah. And I like, I think some people would feel like that statement is a little harsh, but I truly do believe that that's the case. And it's not like, I don't know, I'm trying to be like sensitive, but I just really do think that that is like, in that situation specifically, that is letting that win because it isn't a situation where you are.
Karli Visconto: I know.
Jessica DeRose: like fighting for your life and like not able to like function normally. Like it's just nervousness, right? Like nervousness is normal, but like the next time we do something, if you take the medication and you did it for FOX 29, then it's like, okay, well then now I have to do without it. So it's like, once you can do the hard thing first, then the rest is easier. But I feel like that just over like further complicates it because then How much more nervous would you be next time when you're like, I don't want to take it, but now I know I did well and now I know I'm going to do worse because I won't have it. Does that make sense? It's just like.
Karli Visconto: Exactly. Yes, it's like a reliance or this fundamental belief that that thing allowed you to show up and have success. Yes. And that was exactly what I was going to say. Would it have been easier for me to take that pill and go on to Fox 29 and feel better for that day? Yes. But for me, one thing I always pride myself on, I'm always thinking about the long game.
Jessica DeRose: That was the thing that helped you to do it. Yes. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I'm always thinking about future me and I think in a society that loves instant gratification, I try to go against the grain in that regard and be like, no, I want to make the investment. And so I want to get better at handling high pressure situations. I want to normalize feeling the fear and doing it anyway and facing it head on. And so I know that it's going to take a while to work up to that point where I do feel truly inherently confident going into a situation like that.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: But guess what? I'm not gonna reach that point if I continuously am using a crutch or a, you know, like the training wheels. And so not gonna say that that's everybody's tactic, but for me, I know that I wanna get to that point. And so I gotta feel the pain a little bit for a little while.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah, and I think that's really fair and I think you're talking about it very nicely in saying that like that's just like your preference and that's not like a prescription or you know the right way but I think like whatever we do we have to feel good in our own mind and body and so like for you that decision felt the best that day and so that's what it is. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: 100%. Yeah, because it's all about confidence, right? And like, I want to feel confident that I can do something on my own with my body, with my mind, and with that true internal belief. Yes. Yeah. And that's exactly. And that's a personal preference. ⁓ I think just kind of like wrap it up. We've talked a lot about specifically the most recent example of Fox 29, but this can apply
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Because it's supposed to work that way. Yeah. Yeah. That is how the body is meant to work. Yeah. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: to so many things in life. It looks different for every single person. It can be giving that presentation at work. It can be, you know, meeting a new group of friends for the first time. Like it really does. It can, it can. Do we feel like we have any like tangible pieces of advice or just like thoughts to kind of keep front of mind to just help people approach situations like this and a little bit more of like
Jessica DeRose: It can be calling to order takeout on the phone. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: calm mannered way and navigate them in the moment.
Jessica DeRose: I think personally, I mean, it doesn't, it's not a perfect strategy, but I think with practice it will be. I personally like to combat my intrusive thoughts, you could say with logic and, ⁓ I, this is probably why I'm good at regaining my train of thought because I lose it so often. Like, I don't know why, like, you know when Michael Scott goes, I just sometimes I just start a sentence and I don't know where it's gonna go. Um.
Karli Visconto: Practice makes perfect. No, literally me every time I open my mouth, I'm like, where are we gonna go today? That's the scary part.
Jessica DeRose: Where are we gonna land here? ⁓
Karli Visconto: What were you even just saying?
Jessica DeRose: Were listening? No, I was saying that I try to combat my intrusive thoughts with logic and I also, ⁓ okay, I got it, I got it. So, okay, I try to combat, I'm back online. Why, have I missed out? Hot spot was lagging. ⁓ If we edited this podcast, it'd be so much better. Remember when we used to cut out all of the pauses and the ums and the way that I lost my thought?
Karli Visconto: She's back. Her hotspot just dipped for a second.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, not anymore. You guys are sticking, you're along for the ride. No, right. ⁓ So, okay, so I try to combat my thoughts with logic and then I also try to...
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. That wasn't human enough for us. She's gone again. What the hell is going on over there?
Jessica DeRose: I'm gone. No. I keep getting distracted by like talking.
Karli Visconto: Okay, do you me to go?
Jessica DeRose: or you go.
Karli Visconto: I'm sorry. Well, I'm like, I'll go. I don't have any tips, but I do feel like sometimes maybe reframing anxiety as excitement in the body can also just be a good reframe because I think when we associate it with bad or negative emotion or wrong, it tends to just spiral a little bit. And if there's one thing, it doesn't feel good and you feel bad for it. And if there's one thing about me, I feel like there's always a domino effect.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, it doesn't feel good.
Karli Visconto: And so just that initial thought and that initial reframe can really help turn something negative into positive. And then this is a little bit of like just tough love advice. And we've already really talked about this, but like lean in to the things that scare you because you know what's even more scary? Avoiding them and never being able to face them head on. And I think sometimes we make things really, really big in our head the more that we shy away from them. So for example, if there's a really tough conversation that you know you need to have in life.
Jessica DeRose: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Karli Visconto: And it's been weeks now and you just keep pushing it off, pushing it off and pushing it off. Every time you do that, it's just growing bigger and bigger and bigger in your head. And so I love like, again, counting to three and just doing it where it doesn't apply to that situation, like just making the decision or setting a specific date where you are going to execute on that thing that you've been avoiding because you're feeling the fear. So I really just think it's with all things, repetition will kind of.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah.
Karli Visconto: take the scariness out of it eventually and just having full confidence that you will reach a point where you are doing the thing and you're feeling comfortable and worthy of doing it.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Yeah. And I feel like- with anxiety, like anxiety is actually a very normal feeling. And that's why, you know, we have it for a reason, right? We have it so that we remember our keys or we look both ways before crossing the street. And like, there is a purpose to it, but I think that we can very easily confuse like what it's supposed to be used for. And so I do love the idea of like reframing it a little bit because it can be an anxious, excited.
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm.
Jessica DeRose: Right? like, sometimes you're anxious because you just want to do the best that you can, or you just want to perform the best. so, yeah. And that's where, like, I think I'm kind of going with, like, reframing with logic. I, so the other thing that I was going to say was, reframing with logic along, alongside calling out your feelings. So like being like, I'll talk to myself and be like, I'm feeling super anxious right now.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, you care.
Jessica DeRose: but it's because I just want to do the best. And that's okay, that's fair. And I can want that for myself, but I don't have to get really crazy anxious and not sleep over it, right? Like, and kind of just like have a little conversation with myself, bringing myself down to like earth a little bit, just being like, I hear you, I hear you body that you are trying to like help me. And that's really what it is, right? Like, I don't know if you've ever seen the movie Inside Out, but like,
Karli Visconto: Yeah.
Jessica DeRose: anxiety and all of our emotions are just trying to help and so acknowledging them and being like, hey, I see you, I see you, I know that you want me to do the best that I can and that's why you're here, but I don't need you, like I'm good and we're gonna be okay. So yeah, if you haven't watched that, I feel like you should. Yeah, it is and like I think when we acknowledge things like instead of just trying to ignore them or trying not to feel that way,
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. I love that. It's really a choice.
Jessica DeRose: in my experience, then that has allowed me to put those emotions away. It's not a perfect plan, but I think it helps me talk myself off the ledge a lot when I can say, like, I see you, but like, we're good. Like, we can stand down, you know?
Karli Visconto: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm Yeah, I love that. I really do I think that's a great place to end and I know we have Two more things to get through with this little podcast episode first of them being our only human moments Which I'm still in my head going back and forth between which one I'm gonna say But you could go first and then I'll decide and go next
Jessica DeRose: Yes. Okay, well people might already know of mine because I made a TikTok about it, but it's a little relevant. I burnt my forehead with my curling iron the night before we went on live TV. It's not terrible, but it was definitely a lot more red and I have never done that before. I I've burnt my neck a couple of times with a straightener, but like, you know, you can just hide that with your hair. No, this is just straight on my forehead. I think you can probably see it a little bit if you're looking for it, but thankfully it wasn't like crazy noticeable, but I was just like. And it wasn't even being careless. Like sometimes I do stupid things like that, cause I'm just like rough and like careless kind of. I don't have like spatial awareness. Like I bump into things all the time, but yeah, that was just, I don't know. That was just dress coded.
Karli Visconto: Day before going on live TV. I know it was not noticeable though, honestly All right, I'll guess I'll stay with the theme of heat and fire because Why not? not? ⁓ So I was at someone's house. We're making dinner. They were outside I was in the kitchen I was just like tossing the sale and this was actually the day we did Fox when I was Wednesday So we had gotten up at 430. I had been also running on fumes for like weeks now and
Jessica DeRose: Thank you. All right, what's your only human moment? What do we decide on? ⁓ exhausted. Yeah.
Karli Visconto: I actually had probably 100 only human moments in that day alone. But this one specifically, there were sweet potatoes and broccoli in the oven. All of a sudden, the oven's like on fire. He comes in, he's like, the oven's on fire. I'm literally next to the oven. I'm like, what? Like, didn't smell it, didn't notice it. I'm like, what oven? What? And literally like...
Jessica DeRose: Hmm, didn't notice. You sure?
Karli Visconto: It wasn't up in flames yet. there it was fire. It put the whole oven in it, like go up in flames. Like he called it. I don't know. Honestly, maybe this was less only human of me and like superhuman of him. I'm like, how did you detect that from outside? Because he's like, I smelled it. I sensed it. But I was like completely oblivious just in my own world tossing the salad. So don't count on me to detect or put out a fire, that's for sure. ⁓
Jessica DeRose: ⁓ my god. Yeah, probably thinking about Fox 29. ⁓ god, you need to like stick a fire detector to you or smoke detector to you at all times to keep you safe.
Karli Visconto: No, literally. Yeah, so I guess that was my only human. But I also, when we were leaving for Fox 29, thought I left my curler on, made aunt go back, and then it was off all along. So like, I'm just an overall ditz right now. Yeah, I'm just one big fat human right now.
Jessica DeRose: That is very old-y. Same. same. Only human moment.
Karli Visconto: ⁓ my gosh. Well, this is gonna be our last episode for a little while.
Jessica DeRose: The end of season two if anything Yeah, I was gonna say if anything where you can count us in for abrupt endings And by the way, this is the last you'll hear from
Karli Visconto: Coming to a close. And we're done. Bye.
Jessica DeRose: ⁓ I feel like we're just, with the summer coming up, we have a lot of exciting things going on, especially with in-person events, and I feel like we're feeling very fulfilled from in-person human connection, which is obviously our main goal anyway, but we're just gonna take some time to really lean into that, really lean into the community and face-to-face interaction.
Karli Visconto: Yeah, that's where the excitement is. feel like that's where, you know, people seem to really be like leaning in. And I think only human when we see people in person, they're like, ⁓ you guys hosted the Pilates event or like I see that as like they're never like, ⁓ the podcast. Yeah. And like heading into the summer season where we'll both be down the shore, there's so much opportunity to just put more time and energy there and just really nurture that and like making those in-person connections great.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Mm-hmm. It's never like the podcasters.
Karli Visconto: And so, yeah, we're just taking a break. It's the close of season two. We will, you know, stay in touch about like what season three looks like, when it's coming out, if it's coming out. But for now, I think we just need to kind of water where we think there's the most potential to grow. And that is in person and not digitally.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah, definitely. Yeah. Yeah. Who would have known?
Karli Visconto: who would have known us kind of all along. But like, it does feel weird not releasing something every single week. That's why we do the podcast. It's nice to have a consistent product out there, but there's just so many podcasts out there. yeah, paradox of choice. But all right.
Jessica DeRose: I know. Yeah. Yeah. I know there are a lot to choose from. So, yeah. All right, we'll see you next season. Maybe we'll be back in the studio. Maybe we'll be podcasting from Florida. Who knows?
Karli Visconto: We'll see you when we see you. Yeah, but what we do know, we will be down the shore a lot. We have a lot of Pilates events coming up at Seaport Pier. We're gonna be really leaning into like a whole little like shore aesthetic with journaling sessions on the beach, ice cream runs, group community walks along the water. Like we're really gonna, you know, get excited and do some things in North Whitewood, New Jersey. So definitely stay tuned.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. There will be no shortage of only human. Don't worry about that. You'll still see us all over your Instagram.
Karli Visconto: Yeah. Amazing. especially with our brand new social media hire who is knocking it out of the park. But alright, thank you guys for listening. Bye.
Jessica DeRose: Yeah. Alright. Bye!
