Redefining Success | MENtality with Ebuka, Banky W, Farooq Oreagba & Tobi Bakre

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On today's episode of Mentality with Ebuka, career paths today are far less linear than previous generations experienced.
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Many men feel trapped between passion, survival, and societal expectations of success.
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Joined by my co-host Banke W, as well as finance executive and lifestyle influencer Parouk Oreagba, and actor TV host Toby Bakery.
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This season of mentality with Abuka is brought to you by Schweppes and the Glen Leavett.
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You came to this uh you're not even influenced by game.
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Ross, it's more good with the manage.
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You don't want to manage Hollywood.
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Listen, you cannot define the path that you're going to take.
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You just gotta go with the flow and make the best of it.
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Yeah, that's how we roll.
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You guys want drinks, Abby?
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Yes, please.
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You're welcome, you're welcome.
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We're going to have a good time today.
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We are here to talk careers.
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Indeed.
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Um, this one is for you.
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I know this is you know I'm your guy.
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Yes, I know what you want.
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You'll be rude not to.
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Don't worry, your drink is coming.
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I can't forget you.
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Of course not.
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We're here to talk careers.
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I'm also here.
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Oh, really?
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I didn't notice this.
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We're here to talk careers and how it affects men's egos and all of that.
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And I think for someone like you, for example, who's gone through so many iterations of life.
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I'm still going through.
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I'm still going through.
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Yeah, you're gonna reinvent yourself at the stage.
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And it was almost like, what is the career, even if you keep if you're able to evolve that much?
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And for you, you started off with something and decided to take a full left turn from banking to being this guy, and I still feel like there's more to be in the coming years that we don't even know about.
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Um, but it's just to put things in perspective for a lot of guys watching, because there's a lot of pressure on men to earn, achieve, provide, and all these things are tied to identity, and identity for some reason is tied to your career.
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Yeah, who is this person?
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You know, is that even the right thing to be?
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The right way to look at life.
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Should your identity be tied to your career?
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Thank you.
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Um, you even, this is like your seventh career pattern, occupation, engineer, artist, actor, politician, politician, pastor, motivational speaker.
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You know the end.
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You know, where does it end?
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So I guess it's just like you know, what is a career, even let me start with you.
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What is when these people are coming to learn from him?
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For you know, why do you keep does it is this a conscious thing that you keep almost starting afresh?
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Such an interesting question.
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If it's a conscious thing, so um for me, it's it's it's I guess I would say it's it's kind of a conscious thing, but it's kind of sensing when I feel like it's time to pivot or at least to shift the goalposts.
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So the more that you start to achieve, the more you start to say, what else can I do?
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And for me, that stems from you know, there's a there's a lesson I learned in scripture about the talents.
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And it says the master gave one five, you know, you know.
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But the master gave me what drop one of them.
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Listen, yeah, I am who I am.
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But you know, the master gave the servants different levels of talents based on each's cap capacity.
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And the one with five goes out, uses it, you know, sows it, gets five more, and so on and so forth.
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And then the one who only had one just held on to what he was given.
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And for me, what that scripture, even though it was referencing money in the original context, it all to me it also meant like, what are the giftings, the things that God has gifted you to be able to do?
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And if you settle for what you've been given, then that settling is failure.
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Because while dust settles, people should never.
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So if God has given me the ability to sing, and all I ever do with my life is sing and go home, then that's failure.
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But if from singing I can become a record label owner, and from music I can go into movies, and from movies, I can go into business, and from business I can do something for society and leadership and politics, and ultimately my service to God.
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Like all of these things are me just trying to shift the goalposts because I have this understanding of purpose as like this world that God has created you to influence, and within that, there are multiple callings within that world, but these callings all have seasons, right?
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So, in certain seasons, some callings will be more prominent than others, but ultimately, all of that is to serve the purpose, this big world of purpose that God has created you for.
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So for me, it's it's a question of what did God create me to do and how do I serve that purpose through these multiple callings and seasons in my life to make sure that when all is said and done, I want to die empty.
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Like I don't want to be one of those people like Miles Monroe, I said on a previous show, you know, the richest place on earth is the graveyard because so many people die with things that they they dreamt about, things that they wanted to try, things that and they never did it, and they just took it to the grave.
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So when that day comes and I and all is said and done, I want to be able to say I did my best to die empty.
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So everything that my faith, my dreams, my when you come to the realization eventually was it's always how you were wired.
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It was honestly, I would say, honestly, it I was wired that way from the get-go.
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Because even the people, even when I was in entertainment, the people that I looked up to did multiple things.
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So there are a million rappers, and then there's Jay-Z who went from rapping to business to being an investor, he's in sports, he's in music, he's investing in film, he's investing in skincare, he's doing he did fashion at some point, you know, he did multiple things.
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So those were the people that even when I was like fully, fully just a music guy, I always had my sight set on that.
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Until today, like the people that I look up to, even within ministry, like it would surprise you how many like ministers or pastors are full-on businessmen.
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T D Jakes, you know, is yes, he's a pastor, he's a preacher, but he's a writer, he's a filmmaker, he's he's in real estate, he's in all of these other things.
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Because if God has given you so much capacity, then you fail if you sleep on it.
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Okay.
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So that was always like my my role, my that's what I looked up to, and that's what I always the whole reason we called the company EME was because we had these conversations from the get-go, and we said we're gonna build an empire, and it will start with music, but we're going to eventually do our best to spread our tentacles and just have influence and have impact and do so much more than just Mac It W come and perform and go home, you know.
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So that's very interesting to know.
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Because then there's me who had no idea what the hell I wanted to do.
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Yeah, I only studied law because I was avoiding math.
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And I said, Okay, what scores can I do that has more levels that I'm learning to do one plus one, and that's how I ended up studying law.
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Did law, practiced for a few months, realized this money is far before I go practice, practice, hammer, and then I got into TV because honestly, because of money.
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So I I found this career because I was looking for money.
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I think that's important because a lot of people in this part of the world go down that route.
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Almost what can what's the quickest way, yeah, or what's the best way to start this life that I need?
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Where the money did.
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Yeah, I might not be happy doing it, but now here it happened.
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I mean, I fall in love with what I do now, so I guess mine is a different conversation.
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But I honestly started doing it because everybody was like, Okay, you sound good, you look good, you might work on TV.
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I said, How much did they pay for there?
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Oh, it's not bad.
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Let's try it, yeah.
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And then I fell in love with it, which brings me to you now.
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Because you you are in finance, you are doing a lot of things in in the corporate world.
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Um, but there's also this like this idea now that nine survivors are not hustlers, like you have to start a business, you have to be an entrepreneur to be seen as successful.
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But there's people who build careers in things.
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So, why did you choose the part you chose?
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Um, first of all, uh, I like to touch on something Banke mentioned that about being given a particular talent and it being almost illegal not to use it to your full potential.
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Now, I'm a banker, I've been a banker all my life, I studied civil engineering, I've been a banker.
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Yes, I'm the CEO of a financial institution, I sit on the boards of financial companies, and then there was this viral moment two years ago when someone took a photograph of me doing what I've been doing for 16, 17 years now, and it changed my life.
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And it's funny you say that within a few days when I realized that this thing was not about to just disappear, I was on TV.
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This thing happened on a Tuesday by Saturday, I was on TV, and I was because I had to make I was getting a bit scared.
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What do I do?
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I don't want people to think that I am leaving finance, and this brings me to another thing.
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But then a friend of mine told me your nine to five provides for your survival.
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Yeah, your side hustle gives you freedom, right?
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And that was a defining moment for me because what is turned out to some people, what people call my side hustle, is me just being me.
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Yeah, it's me just being me.
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Yes, I ride horses, I do this, I'm now in movies.
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Um that's so interesting.
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Somebody call me, but somebody somebody called me.
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I mean, the fashion, you know.
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They told you that like 10 years ago, you'll be doing like five, seven.
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Listen, me, movies, not a chance.
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I mean, I have been controversial.
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I mean, I I would say I'm probably the only CEO in mainstream corporate Nigeria that wears earrings and has tattoos.
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That has been a problem from day dot.
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Right?
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They judge you, judge me terribly, you know.
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Um, and uh to a certain extent, it's cost me certain roles.
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Really?
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Certain positions, yes, you know.
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Um but going back to what you you the question you asked, my what they call my side hustle, which for me is just being me, has is given me an extreme amount of freedom, and more importantly, an extreme amount of self-satisfaction.
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Um, it is a hustle, it is a big, big um issue trying to juggle everything.
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And um even in my corporate role, it's still, you know, I sit down with boards and they people say to me, uh the the image of uh of a CEO in financial services riding horses and flashing tattoos is not what we want.
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Guys, what do you want?
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When you hired me, I had tattoos.
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When you hired me, I was smoking cigars.
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Is it just bad ballet?
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Or the fact that you don't want me to have the freedom that this brings, this role brings to me.
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And that's really what it is.
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Let's call a spade a spade.
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People will hate whether you do well, Banki, I'm sure you know, Ibuka, you know, Toby, you know it.
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Whether you do well or not, there's still gonna be one group of people out there who are gonna hate you, you know, because we're very good at that.
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And I think what I'm I'm learning to do is switch off the noise, right?
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And just do what suits me best.
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Now, in terms of pressure, the pressure on guys to deliver, especially in an environment like Nigeria, is considerable.
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The man has to do this, man has to do that.
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Though you have the there's the social side, ah, if you don't deliver, if you don't buy a new car for Madame every two years, if you don't live in Vegas, you know, Vegas.
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It's and I think I think the most important thing is, you know, you know, I've had different issues in my life, I've had health issues, yeah, and you know, I've taken all these things.
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What you see now is as a result of all my experiences.
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If you take, I I say this on many occasions.
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Me falling ill was one of the, if I can say I can live another 15, 20 years, I would say categorically, falling ill was one of the best things that ever happened to me because it allowed me to prioritize what's important, what's not important, and realize that there's no there's no time better than now.
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When did you fall ill again?
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How long ago was this?
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Um, it was I was diagnosed on the 3rd of February 2014.
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Was it post that that the earrings and tattoos happened?
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No, okay, those were there already.
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Um tattoos and earrings were there before.
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Okay.
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So how did you start living differently after that?
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Well, first of all, um I just realized the will to live.
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Um I was very popular, I was a very successful banker.
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I was driving fast cars when I was in London.
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I was on the I was a big trader in for investment banks.
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So I was living the life, you know, the sports cars, I was traveling, I was partying.
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When the when the trouble started, if I had a million friends, they went down to 100.
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That was the first realization.
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What for me that was always true though?
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The guys that I was thinking, ah, that's my G is gonna pull off for me.
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Homie never pulled up.
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But what also happened was people that I never expected Jack from pulled up and says, Oh boy, I was ho I was with this man in Johannesburg in 2015.
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Remember?
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Yes, sir.
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We bumped into each other first time I met you in 2015.
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I'm like, dude, this is me.
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And I was like, well, and we've been friends since happy days.
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Yes, sir.
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So people that I expected to pull up that I thought would my G, we drink every day, we party every day, homies never pulled up.
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In fact, some of them were surprised that I still came back, you know, not in a six by two box.
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Um, but my will to live, obviously, I had kids.
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Um, my youngest son at the time was two years old.
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So, and I grew up without a father.
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My father died when I was four, and my mother is still alive, she's 86.
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And the woman buried her husband.
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I was pretty determined she wasn't going to bury her son, her only son.
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So, for a variety of factors, but the will to live was sort of it was harvested then.
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And not just through then as it as time went on, it was the will to live my way.
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Because there was an element of bitterness.
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You know, who are used to tell me what to do?
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When I was suffering, you are when I was dying, you were no longer there.
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I came through with the help of certain group of friends, those are the ones that matter.
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No hatred, you know.
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But um, I and I've you know gone to live on I'm living my best life, and we can see and hopefully many more, many more years to come.
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But you know, I'll stop there for now and then we still got time, right?
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So let me go to you now to say because this story is very sweet.
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Very sweet, very sweet.
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Let me not set you up.
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But you also have an interesting story.
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You're a banker, your dad is a banker as well.
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So you understand this world he's describing, but he has thrived in that world with his stees.
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You needed your stees to be expressed differently.
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What made you make that switch so early?
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Did you know what you were looking for?
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Because you went on a reality show and then you pivoted to an actor and TV host and all of these things.
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Why did you want to do make that switch?
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Uh so at the time I was in a bank, I had done five years.
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Did you sorry before I even go there?
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Did you start banking because you wanted it because daddy was a bank?
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That was a low-hanging fruit.
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Okay.
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So after NYSC, it was more, it was more like where is the opportunity going to come from?
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You didn't choose.
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Yeah, and I did finance in school, so it was more like okay, you can you know be in the bank and you know grow to uh through the ranks.
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And when I go into training school, it kind of became a bit fun.
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And I remember going to the treasury office, and I'm like, okay, this is not the regular banking, this is where I want to be, because it was just like more, it had the whole ayage finesse, and I'm like, okay, yeah, okay, I can actually be a banker.
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So I did five years, but at the between like the third and fifth year, the economy just kind of like dwindled.
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Um, I we used to trade FX, we used to trade uh, you know, securities, and the market was kind of like at a standstill.
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Nara was not, yeah.
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You know, the currency was locked, you know, at a certain range, and I really will come to work every day knowing a program can do everything I'm here in the office to do.
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Something can be programmed to really pretty much just do everything I come to the office to do.
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And that was called before.
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Yeah, even before and I really looked at it, but I had amazing colleagues, uh, my senior colleagues at the time.
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I was the youngest uh staff, and at the time it was more like guy, you need to go to another financial institution.
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And I'd done five years.
00:18:07.440 --> 00:18:10.160
I was like, I was impressive, if I might say so myself.
00:18:10.400 --> 00:18:12.240
Five years, that means you started what 19?
00:18:12.640 --> 00:18:13.039
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:18:13.519 --> 00:18:14.000
That's really young.
00:18:14.160 --> 00:18:14.640
Yeah, 19.
00:18:14.799 --> 00:18:15.200
So well done.
00:18:15.519 --> 00:18:16.000
Okay, go on.
00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:34.559
So I'd done like five years, and then they my senior colleagues were um you know suggesting maybe you want to go to another uh financial institution, at least get promoted because my bank wasn't really making money at the time, so they were not promoting people.
00:18:34.720 --> 00:18:36.400
So I was kind of like at a standstill.
00:18:36.480 --> 00:18:40.799
The only thing that was getting better in life were you know, was my physique, my muscles.
00:18:41.440 --> 00:18:44.319
You know, gym was the only thing that was moving forward.
00:18:44.720 --> 00:18:46.720
Yes, everything was just standstill.
00:18:46.960 --> 00:18:50.880
So it was uh another financial institution, uh institution or masters.
00:18:51.599 --> 00:18:53.200
So masters felt more like it.
00:18:53.279 --> 00:18:59.440
I'm like, okay, I was in my CFA already, I had CFA level one, two to go, but I'm like, okay, let me do masters and jackbach.
00:18:59.680 --> 00:19:00.319
So kind of that.
00:19:01.599 --> 00:19:04.480
So that was more like the plan, but I wasn't quite sure I wanted to leave.
00:19:04.640 --> 00:19:08.079
So you're not in Saskatchewan now, so yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:19:09.200 --> 00:19:11.119
So at the time I'm like, okay, you know what?
00:19:11.200 --> 00:19:13.440
I always watch Big Brother, and that's true.
00:19:13.519 --> 00:19:14.960
I feel like they need me on there.
00:19:15.039 --> 00:19:19.359
I feel like because somehow I've already I've always lived a very expressive life.
00:19:19.519 --> 00:19:21.440
Um, I'm very sociable.
00:19:21.920 --> 00:19:26.559
I was in banking, but I had quality friends outside of banking.
00:19:26.720 --> 00:19:29.440
I was riding a bike, I was an active guy in the gym.
00:19:29.519 --> 00:19:33.440
So I just had like all these different parts of me that just felt rich as a person.
00:19:33.519 --> 00:19:43.440
So I'm like, okay, I feel like I'll be interested on that show and it will be fun because I really just wanted to experience it, have the fun, and then from there, which I but then I went to.
00:19:43.680 --> 00:19:44.799
So your plan was not entertainment.
00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:45.839
Yeah, it wasn't entertainment.
00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:54.720
I never for before I go into entertainment, I never saw myself acting, never saw myself doing any of the stuff I remember the conversations we had after.
00:19:55.200 --> 00:19:56.400
I never, never.
00:19:56.640 --> 00:19:59.519
So uh after Big Brother, it was now okay.
00:19:59.599 --> 00:20:01.680
Now for real, what do you want to do?
00:20:01.759 --> 00:20:06.480
And it's like, okay, yeah, you know, first shock was oh, they called me for an appearance.
00:20:06.720 --> 00:20:11.200
Typically, I go clubbing, I go to the club, my 130k salary.
00:20:11.359 --> 00:20:18.160
I will maybe buy the 50,000 dollars, management trainee, sir.
00:20:18.640 --> 00:20:22.880
Naira, management trainee, your management possibilities of brands, you know.
00:20:24.160 --> 00:20:25.839
I still have my letter.
00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:33.599
So then you know, you go to the club, and then I was being paid to uh uh you know come and have fun.
00:20:33.920 --> 00:20:36.079
Yeah, free drinks, yeah, and 500k.
00:20:36.319 --> 00:20:38.720
That's like three times you know three months' work.
00:20:39.039 --> 00:20:41.200
So okay, okay, okay, let's find what to do.
00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:49.680
So it was also the money thing, like let's find what to do here to at least make all of this work before we figure out what it is you know we're going to do.
00:20:49.839 --> 00:20:53.279
And somehow along the way, I got into acting.
00:20:53.440 --> 00:20:55.519
Because then I wasn't quite, I really wasn't sure.
00:20:55.680 --> 00:21:05.839
Of course, I had role models like Ebouca, and you know, people are just like, okay, you have the same, you know, packaging, you can speak well, you look decent, you know, you're you're good on TV, just you know, follow the steps.
00:21:05.920 --> 00:21:10.319
But I'm like, you know, I love I love everything, but like let's just see where it goes.
00:21:10.400 --> 00:21:16.240
Because my motto in life pretty much is whatever God has given you to do, do it very well.
00:21:16.319 --> 00:21:26.720
Yeah, do it to the best of your ability, and somehow, somehow, it would open the next chapter because that's a cloud myself and I feel a lot of young people find themselves in.
00:21:26.880 --> 00:21:32.880
Sometimes some people have the 10 years, 20 years plan in mind already, they have it penned down somewhere.
00:21:32.960 --> 00:21:37.039
But for someone like myself, I've always lived life not really knowing what's next.
00:21:37.200 --> 00:21:37.680
What's next?
00:21:38.000 --> 00:21:44.480
But with the kind of household I was brought up in, my dad, my mom is whatever it is you've done or you have to do, do it very well.
00:21:44.559 --> 00:21:45.279
And it's worked.
00:21:45.359 --> 00:21:48.319
When I was in the bank, I did it very well and it opened doors.
00:21:48.480 --> 00:21:53.200
Like I can go to my old bosses right now, submit a business proposal.
00:21:53.359 --> 00:21:54.640
Anything is still gonna fly.
00:21:54.720 --> 00:21:56.160
We still have an amazing relationship.
00:21:56.319 --> 00:22:01.200
When I got into the acting space, it I Treated it like a job.
00:22:01.359 --> 00:22:03.359
It's a creative space, but I treated it like a job.
00:22:03.519 --> 00:22:05.519
He asked me to be there at eight.
00:22:05.599 --> 00:22:07.279
I'm probably there at 7:30.
00:22:07.359 --> 00:22:08.880
So I'm always on time.
00:22:09.200 --> 00:22:10.799
I'm down with the work.
00:22:10.880 --> 00:22:14.240
So in between all of that, I fell in love uh with acting.
00:22:14.400 --> 00:22:17.119
And people, I just liked seeing myself on TV.
00:22:17.519 --> 00:22:18.720
Not looking stupid.
00:22:18.960 --> 00:22:20.720
And then, you know, the love from everybody.
00:22:20.880 --> 00:22:31.440
And then I'm like, okay, I like how the different processes and different parts and different ideas and you know duties of everybody comes together and it all looks beautiful and people appreciate it.
00:22:31.599 --> 00:22:34.480
So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna do this a little more, you know.
00:22:34.559 --> 00:22:36.160
And then it's more like okay, whatever comes.
00:22:36.240 --> 00:22:42.880
I'm still even in a space where when they say, oh, actor, more like defining my career as an actor.
00:22:43.200 --> 00:22:47.599
Like it not, it doesn't, it's not I'm not grounded in it here.
00:22:47.839 --> 00:22:50.640
Because I still see myself as so many other things.
00:22:50.799 --> 00:22:53.440
So when someone calls me an actor, I'm like, oh, that's what you see me as.
00:22:53.519 --> 00:22:54.160
Oh, great.
00:22:54.400 --> 00:23:02.799
Because I love that I'm an actor, but I don't necessarily see myself as one because there are so many other things I can explore that I haven't yet explored.
00:23:02.880 --> 00:23:09.440
You know, I paint, I bought one of my paintings, you know, there are other things I would really like to do.
00:23:10.319 --> 00:23:11.599
Take pictures, photography.
00:23:11.759 --> 00:23:18.640
So the creative space, just like we creative space, once money starts to enter, it kind of like sucks out the creativity in it.
00:23:18.799 --> 00:23:23.359
So I'm really in the part in life where now it's acting and I'm going to give it all I've got.
00:23:23.599 --> 00:23:30.400
Now I'm a father, I've grown and I've learned, okay, you're in acting, but there are other opportunities within this space.
00:23:30.559 --> 00:23:36.319
You can produce, you can, you know, create stories, you can go into there are different things you want to explore.
00:23:36.400 --> 00:23:38.160
So I'm really going to double down on it.
00:23:38.319 --> 00:23:43.039
And hopefully, within that path and that journey, the next phase of life is really going to open up.
00:23:43.279 --> 00:23:49.599
How much, how much, how much of uh role does money still play in the decisions you make?
00:23:50.400 --> 00:23:53.039
Huge, huge, huge.
00:23:53.200 --> 00:23:56.880
Like, I was a bit, I had more freedom when I was younger.
00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:01.279
Yeah, I'm still young, but like without the discrimination.
00:24:02.559 --> 00:24:14.640
You know, uh we can we can play twist so uh for me it plays a major factor now because I'm thinking freedom, I'm thinking security for my family.
00:24:14.799 --> 00:24:29.920
So, in all of these things I say, even right now, I have to go into business because now I said when uh uh the things around creativity, when you start putting a lot of money into it, the creativity kind of like you know is sucked out of it for me personally.
00:24:30.079 --> 00:24:34.640
So now I'm trying to look for other ventures that can create this money, businesses.
00:24:34.799 --> 00:24:40.960
Like I've always been scared of business because if I after I asked for how many rules and I'll put the money in business, something I'll do.
00:24:42.480 --> 00:24:43.680
You people do goof for me.
00:24:44.880 --> 00:24:46.400
But you see what he's saying, yeah.
00:24:46.640 --> 00:24:48.240
Your side hustle gives you freedom.
00:24:48.559 --> 00:24:50.000
You know, he's just confirmed it.
00:24:50.079 --> 00:24:56.720
Yeah, you know, he's doing these things because he's he's worried about, you know, he wants to in the security going forward, yeah.
00:24:56.880 --> 00:25:06.559
You know, and I the other thing you mentioned, which is very important, and I think people like us that sort of multitask is the professionalism.
00:25:07.119 --> 00:25:08.880
You have to take each one.
00:25:09.119 --> 00:25:19.759
If I if I start messing around in my corporate job, I can assure you, because the persona everybody has of me is the guy that does is a is a finance guy and is also Stees.
00:25:20.480 --> 00:25:24.079
You take one of those away, it changes the whole picture.
00:25:24.640 --> 00:25:32.400
So there's a need, just like you said, you you paint, you do this, there's a need to try and be as professional as possible in all aspects.
00:25:32.799 --> 00:25:45.519
You know, the need to feel to deliver, you know, but the joy you get from your side hustle, I'm sure, yes, money plays a role, but I'm I'm sure the contentment, the satisfaction you get goes a long way.
00:25:45.759 --> 00:25:46.960
Yes, I totally agree.
00:25:47.200 --> 00:25:47.759
It's very important.
00:25:48.000 --> 00:25:52.160
That's what's so somehow my job and my career acting gives me a lot of satisfaction.
00:25:52.319 --> 00:25:54.400
We're in the same situation, it's it's a common thread.
00:25:54.640 --> 00:25:55.039
It does, it does.
00:25:55.279 --> 00:25:57.359
But now I have to look for the things that will give me the money.
00:26:01.440 --> 00:26:02.480
It's not paying the deal.
00:26:02.559 --> 00:26:04.559
So I didn't know that, though.
00:26:04.960 --> 00:26:06.079
So they have they conned me.
00:26:06.240 --> 00:26:06.640
Exactly.
00:26:08.480 --> 00:26:12.559
I thought I was about to reassess your realities.
00:26:13.119 --> 00:26:14.400
It will give the C's, though.
00:26:15.119 --> 00:26:17.839
Well, you know, for me it's a new, you know.
00:26:18.000 --> 00:26:24.160
I never, you know, for me when I was told to come and act, I think it was a shock that um the director.
00:26:26.240 --> 00:26:28.960
You know, I said, I've never, I said, I don't, I don't know how to do this stuff.
00:26:29.039 --> 00:26:30.400
I never I said Farouk.
00:26:30.640 --> 00:26:31.599
I said, is it a cameo?
00:26:31.680 --> 00:26:32.559
She said, no, you have lines.
00:26:32.720 --> 00:26:33.359
I said lines.
00:26:34.160 --> 00:26:37.440
Ah, if I have to ride horse enter, I can do that with the guy.
00:26:37.519 --> 00:26:45.279
I said, no, you're going to but you know, after after each scene, you know, did I do a cases?
00:26:45.680 --> 00:26:46.079
Perfect.
00:26:46.319 --> 00:26:48.160
I had to go do the ADRs last week.
00:26:48.319 --> 00:26:50.319
And you saw the shots, you know, you like it.
00:26:50.720 --> 00:27:06.640
Yeah, if you don't feel what I get from all of this is almost a common thing that you find with a lot of Nigerians now, the need to have more than one thing that you're doing.
00:27:06.720 --> 00:27:11.599
I saw a quote one time that said something like the bigger risk now is not, how does it go?
00:27:11.680 --> 00:27:18.640
It's not um having taking risk is not the bigger risk, it's having doing just one thing.
00:27:19.119 --> 00:27:20.400
I I heard something interesting.
00:27:20.480 --> 00:27:28.880
Uh Waji said in an interview that even in the Garden of Eden, you can see that the stream has different places where the water was going.
00:27:32.960 --> 00:27:35.200
So it's supposed to be one thing anymore.
00:27:35.279 --> 00:27:35.440
Right.
00:27:35.599 --> 00:27:36.799
That's exactly where the risk is.
00:27:36.960 --> 00:27:37.119
Absolutely.
00:27:38.240 --> 00:27:50.559
And if you're blessed to be in a position whereby the extra thing is you being original, you being yourself.
00:27:50.799 --> 00:27:56.640
I am I'm not gonna go and try and be a doctor, you know, because I because I hear that hospitals they make a lot of money.
00:27:56.720 --> 00:27:58.720
I'm not now gonna try and go into that business.
00:27:58.960 --> 00:28:05.839
But if you're privileged, whereby what we call a side hostel or whatever, is actually you just being yourself.
00:28:05.920 --> 00:28:09.200
I'm sure you were you were a good painter, you're a good artist anyway.
00:28:09.279 --> 00:28:10.480
It's not as if you went to art school.
00:28:10.559 --> 00:28:19.680
So it was a talent you had, and just being able to leverage on that, when it's something that is you anyway, it actually makes it a lot easier.
00:28:19.920 --> 00:28:23.279
I want to come to you on that because you are the finance guy, you've you've seen things.
00:28:23.680 --> 00:28:27.440
You also understand but you also understand how money works, yes, right?
00:28:27.680 --> 00:28:30.960
With what you do, and I can't remember the exact percentage now.
00:28:31.039 --> 00:28:33.680
That's what I've been trying to find because I saw this data before, but I can't remember.
00:28:33.759 --> 00:28:40.960
I know it basically said a large percentage of small businesses in Nigeria fail in three to five years.
00:28:41.359 --> 00:28:42.319
It's inevitable.
00:28:42.480 --> 00:28:49.839
Yeah, whether it's policy, you start something, government just brings out one new and it dies, or lack of planning.
00:28:49.920 --> 00:28:56.480
Not many people start businesses here with business plans because they don't have access to even know that that should be done.
00:28:56.720 --> 00:29:01.759
So the average person might look at you guys and think, oh, these guys are privileged.
00:29:02.240 --> 00:29:07.200
You know, so you have the luxury of being able to do different things uh for whatever reason.
00:29:07.359 --> 00:29:16.319
The average guy in this country cannot just start things because they want to all quit their job and go try something else.
00:29:16.559 --> 00:29:20.559
I mean, big brother might not be a privilege, but people audition, not everybody gets in, right?
00:29:20.799 --> 00:29:25.359
So if you feel like you didn't get that opportunity, what do you where do you go?
00:29:25.440 --> 00:29:39.039
So I guess my question is how does since we've all concluded that doing more than one thing is important, how does the regular guy approach that conversation without feeling like they are not very I I see where you're coming from.
00:29:39.200 --> 00:29:40.160
I'll tell you this, right?
00:29:40.240 --> 00:29:52.160
Um, I also I I'm the chairman of another financial institution that um focuses um it's women focused, it's primarily to support women.
00:29:52.240 --> 00:29:58.799
Okay, and we also we lend our biggest line is we lend money to market women.
00:29:59.039 --> 00:30:02.559
Guys, you'll be surprised how much money market women make.
00:30:02.880 --> 00:30:03.279
Finance.
00:30:03.920 --> 00:30:04.720
I've heard I've heard those stories.
00:30:04.880 --> 00:30:05.839
You'll be able to do that.
00:30:06.400 --> 00:30:09.759
It's a legal you will be whether you are selling pepper, you know.
00:30:09.839 --> 00:30:17.200
We have we have my my firm has booths, we have offices in Badagray Market, we have in Sangro, we have the turnover.
00:30:17.359 --> 00:30:19.440
Yeah, sorry, my brother, my brother was a banker for many years.
00:30:19.519 --> 00:30:23.039
He's left banking now, and he ran a lot of branches for his bank.
00:30:23.119 --> 00:30:24.240
He still says it to today.
00:30:24.480 --> 00:30:26.319
The best branch ever enjoyed is Dumotar.
00:30:26.400 --> 00:30:26.880
I'm telling you.
00:30:27.039 --> 00:30:35.599
Wow, I'm telling you, you'll be surprised in the biggest promotion of the marketing was because he was branch manager on a daily basis.
00:30:36.400 --> 00:30:43.920
So the point I'm trying to make is this most of these women who are selling at the markets, they're not educated.
00:30:45.680 --> 00:30:47.599
I will even flip the script.
00:30:47.920 --> 00:30:54.720
I used to run the trading flow for one of the biggest hedge funds in the world, um, man group.
00:30:55.599 --> 00:30:58.480
I was on the London Derivatives Exchange back in the day.
00:30:58.559 --> 00:31:03.440
You see all those guys, you see pictures of Wall Street, those guys buying and selling shares, shouting.
00:31:03.839 --> 00:31:05.599
90% of those guys don't have degrees.
00:31:05.920 --> 00:31:09.039
I've heard that 90% of those guys don't have degrees.
00:31:10.880 --> 00:31:17.519
They will sell whiskey, they will sell oranges, they will sell mobile phones.
00:31:17.759 --> 00:31:19.680
It just so happens that they're selling shares.
00:31:19.920 --> 00:31:20.720
You understand?
00:31:21.200 --> 00:31:30.559
If you want to go and study, if you went to Oxford, Cambridge, Harvard, in the banking sector, they'll put you as an inventment banker, you'll be upstairs.
00:31:31.359 --> 00:31:36.319
That's why in finance, on the trading side, they said accountants don't make good traders.
00:31:36.720 --> 00:31:38.319
You are you are a CFA.
00:31:38.559 --> 00:31:39.759
Accountants are in treasury.
00:31:39.839 --> 00:31:43.200
Yeah, the guys who are trading on the floor, they take risks, they're taking risks.
00:31:43.359 --> 00:31:44.319
Accountants they like to do.
00:31:44.480 --> 00:31:45.359
They like to analyze things.
00:31:45.839 --> 00:31:50.799
So the point I'm saying is the guys who it's a skill.
00:31:50.960 --> 00:32:02.880
Now, what the point I'm trying to make is a lot of these businesses where people go wrong with side hustle is you go and do side hustle because somebody says there's money in uh property.
00:32:03.359 --> 00:32:06.880
You're not a property guy, you have no passion for property.
00:32:07.200 --> 00:32:09.119
But people say we should also follow where there's money.
00:32:09.359 --> 00:32:11.920
Bro, don't follow your follow your passion.
00:32:15.279 --> 00:32:19.920
I have been a banker on my study civil engineering, I went into finance, I've been finance all my life.
00:32:20.160 --> 00:32:24.480
Somebody now says to me, well, you have a passion for this, I want to put you on billboard.
00:32:24.640 --> 00:32:26.720
That's how I ended up wherever I am now.
00:32:26.960 --> 00:32:28.559
I didn't go looking for it.
00:32:28.720 --> 00:32:35.359
It's it's something that whether the money is there or not, it's something that I'm passionate about.
00:32:36.319 --> 00:32:41.519
And this is where I think a lot of businesses and a lot of startups go wrong.
00:32:41.759 --> 00:32:49.440
A lot of startups go wrong because the people don't know enough about the business that they're going into.
00:32:49.599 --> 00:32:55.519
Not because they didn't study or they didn't understand, but because also they don't put the time that is needed to go into it.
00:32:55.680 --> 00:32:56.799
Why don't they put the time?
00:32:56.960 --> 00:32:58.079
Because they don't enjoy it.
00:32:58.400 --> 00:32:59.599
It's like hard work.
00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:03.599
You don't want to put your money where you don't watch it 24-7.
00:33:03.920 --> 00:33:15.119
So, in answer to your question, there there is, I'm still a hundred percent supportive of people who have a side hustle because, like I said, it gives you that freedom.
00:33:15.759 --> 00:33:24.240
But whether you are selling paint or beer or mobile phones, if you're good enough at what you do, you will make a success of it.
00:33:24.480 --> 00:33:29.599
The other thing you need to do and learn from is don't judge your success by other people's matrices.
00:33:29.680 --> 00:33:33.119
Yeah, that's the hardest part of social media makes it worse.
00:33:33.599 --> 00:33:36.720
So you are seeing your guys now, people are tearing cars every two days.
00:33:37.039 --> 00:33:38.160
Dude, people are buying houses.
00:33:40.480 --> 00:33:41.119
That's the hardest part.
00:33:41.279 --> 00:33:47.599
And and like I said, the lessons I learned from my from when I was ill, I could only sleep.
00:33:48.160 --> 00:33:50.880
When I fell ill, I had six cars in my driveway.
00:33:51.759 --> 00:33:53.119
Now I have one.
00:33:53.440 --> 00:33:55.039
Because last last.
00:33:55.279 --> 00:33:58.720
Even I my guys, I will not mention them.
00:33:58.799 --> 00:34:00.799
I gave away a Range Rover to one of my staff.
00:34:00.880 --> 00:34:01.519
One day he came.
00:34:01.759 --> 00:34:02.559
What was this?
00:34:04.000 --> 00:34:05.039
Even the way I was in your life.
00:34:07.119 --> 00:34:07.759
These are the issues.
00:34:08.400 --> 00:34:09.920
I had six cars in my driveway.
00:34:10.079 --> 00:34:13.760
One of my seventh series, somebody wanted to buy my seventh series.
00:34:14.000 --> 00:34:17.119
Well, he arranged for one of his friends to buy my seventh series.
00:34:17.280 --> 00:34:20.800
They came to the house and we're now having to move cars to get out.
00:34:21.760 --> 00:34:22.880
Okay, this range.
00:34:22.960 --> 00:34:23.679
I said you want it.
00:34:23.760 --> 00:34:24.800
Well, bro, take it.
00:34:24.960 --> 00:34:28.159
Weak moment, but till tomorrow I can stand up.
00:34:28.320 --> 00:34:30.000
You know, he knows who he is.
00:34:30.079 --> 00:34:31.039
I said, take it.
00:34:31.199 --> 00:34:34.239
You know, it's the least of my problems now.
00:34:34.639 --> 00:34:36.159
In case you feel like doing it again, bro.
00:34:37.280 --> 00:34:38.320
I only have a few guys.
00:34:42.960 --> 00:34:44.079
You know your game brother.
00:34:47.119 --> 00:34:55.920
No, but you see, you know, it's when you have when you may have 99 problems, right?
00:34:56.239 --> 00:34:59.599
The minute you only you have a health problem, yeah, you only have one problem.
00:34:59.840 --> 00:35:03.920
I heard it said once that a healthy person wants a million things.
00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:06.159
Yeah, a sick person only wants one thing.
00:35:06.320 --> 00:35:06.880
One thing.
00:35:07.039 --> 00:35:08.480
So levels change, yeah.
00:35:08.559 --> 00:35:13.280
And that's why I keep on saying to people, you know, I do a lot of cancer, uh, cancer counseling and stuff.
00:35:13.360 --> 00:35:17.199
And I I I talk to people and they were like, ah, look at you, you're happy.
00:35:17.280 --> 00:35:18.400
I said, You don't know my problems.
00:35:18.559 --> 00:35:23.199
But I every day I wake up in the morning, I swear I'm a winner.
00:35:23.599 --> 00:35:24.800
I am a winner.
00:35:24.960 --> 00:35:29.360
Even if I have a problem, by waking up, I have a chance of solving that problem.
00:35:29.440 --> 00:35:31.679
There are people that went to bed last night that did not wake up this morning.
00:35:31.760 --> 00:35:33.360
I want to tell me that I'm not a winner.
00:35:33.519 --> 00:35:35.760
I don't judge myself by other people's, you know.
00:35:35.840 --> 00:35:45.519
And and once you get into that space, Niger is hard, though, the competition, you know, you want to do this person, like you said, bought one G-Wagon, you want to go and buy your own.
00:35:46.320 --> 00:35:49.760
And maybe this is where maturity actually plays a role.
00:35:49.920 --> 00:35:51.840
So, which is why I'll I I I was thank you.
00:35:52.159 --> 00:35:59.440
I'm privileged to be here, so I can actually just tell people that run your own race, be your own best guy, run your own race.
00:35:59.760 --> 00:36:01.119
You know, I also ask one question.
00:36:01.360 --> 00:36:01.760
Sure.
00:36:02.320 --> 00:36:03.920
Before we get, can you hold the question?
00:36:04.320 --> 00:36:21.679
Um, because you you asked something about small businesses failing, which I think is an important thing to touch on, yeah, because um there's this debate between being an employee versus being an entrepreneur.
00:36:21.920 --> 00:36:31.920
And it's important to note that being an entrepreneur is not for everybody, it's a very difficult road running your own organization, running your own business.
00:36:32.159 --> 00:36:39.280
And you can also be an employee that has, like you've described, you know, side hustles or things on the side that add to the pot.
00:36:39.440 --> 00:36:44.960
But so there's no shame in being an employee that has a career and building your life that way.
00:36:45.039 --> 00:36:46.960
That's a very valid way to go.
00:36:47.199 --> 00:36:48.719
But there's almost shaming with that thing now.
00:36:48.800 --> 00:36:49.599
They must shame with that.
00:36:50.400 --> 00:36:52.079
They make it look like they are working for perpetuality.
00:36:52.800 --> 00:36:53.119
Yes.
00:36:53.280 --> 00:36:55.280
But there's there's really no shame in the business.
00:36:55.519 --> 00:36:55.920
There's no shame.
00:36:56.320 --> 00:37:09.760
But the thing that I wanted to say about small businesses failing, the the the truth is um I think in the US, and it's not just a Nigerian thing, because in the US, I think it's something like 80 or 90 percent of small businesses eventually fail.
00:37:10.239 --> 00:37:14.320
And the mistake that we make is well, we make one of two mistakes.
00:37:14.400 --> 00:37:19.119
One, we make the mistake that you described, which is you don't have a passion for something.
00:37:19.519 --> 00:37:22.480
And because there's money there, you go after it.
00:37:23.519 --> 00:37:26.079
The other mistake that we make is it's not always a mistake.
00:37:26.400 --> 00:37:26.880
Sometimes it was.
00:37:27.039 --> 00:37:27.599
Sometimes it was.
00:37:28.239 --> 00:37:36.400
But the other mistake that some people make is that you have a passion for something and you go into it, but you don't create a business, you create a job.
00:37:36.639 --> 00:37:37.519
A job, yes, yes.
00:37:37.760 --> 00:37:41.039
And in creating a job, you've created a job that you can never fire yourself from.
00:37:41.199 --> 00:37:43.519
So you have basically created a prison around yourself.
00:37:43.599 --> 00:38:12.000
And what I mean by that is so I I was um I was chatting with a friend of mine who I think everybody at this table probably knows her, and we were talking about a business that I was involved in at the time, you know, in the food space and all the things, the great things that we're doing, we're expanding restaurants, and she said, Hey, you know, I've always felt like I can go into a business selling like chin chin and you know, you know, kind of small pastries, and that the the she's very passionate about.
00:38:12.159 --> 00:38:15.760
In fact, she makes it at home for her friends and people love it when they come.
00:38:15.840 --> 00:38:18.000
So she's always wanted to kind of create something around it.
00:38:18.079 --> 00:38:37.039
But the challenge that she has is that she can't make a business, well, if she tries to make a business out of it, nobody can make it like her, and so she'll have to be the person there, like doing the pastry making herself for it to work, and she's so busy that she doesn't have the time.
00:38:37.280 --> 00:39:07.280
And I told her exactly what I'm saying now, which is the danger is if you have to be the person there doing the business, then you're not an entrepreneur, you are an employee, you have created a job for yourself, like the point of being in business is to create a system that produces a certain result, and you want to eventually get to the point where you are working on the business rather than in the business, and that's what a lot of people miss.
00:39:07.440 --> 00:39:14.239
So when you are starting out, none of us ever have like all the roles, like all the collaborations and things that you need.
00:39:14.400 --> 00:39:20.480
So you are this uh CEO, Ebuka, CEO, Ebuka, Chief Marketing Officer Ebuka.
00:39:20.880 --> 00:39:22.719
But give me the money, but give me the money's idea.
00:39:24.400 --> 00:39:30.000
But the goal is to be able to put yourself in all of those roles in your vision for the business.
00:39:30.159 --> 00:39:39.760
But eventually, you want to build the system such that you start to fire yourself from those things so you get to the place where you can work on it rather than inside it.
00:39:39.840 --> 00:39:52.159
So the business has to get to the point where it's able to run aside from you doing the technical work of it so that you can you can work on vision, you can work on scale, you can work on building it.
00:39:52.320 --> 00:40:00.880
And that's where people who go into business from passion make the mistake is you end up creating a job, not a business.
00:40:01.119 --> 00:40:01.280
Absolutely.
00:40:02.719 --> 00:40:03.599
No, I remember your question.
00:40:04.880 --> 00:40:06.239
Ben, my lot of things.
00:40:07.679 --> 00:40:08.639
A lot of knowledge going in.
00:40:08.800 --> 00:40:12.079
That's why I'm like, okay, now I can tap into your wisdom.
00:40:12.239 --> 00:40:25.360
So um just thinking as a younger, my younger self, or even now, and a lot of other younger people, the idea of a career, a lot of people starting to start out not knowing what they really want to do.
00:40:25.760 --> 00:40:26.480
That's all I'm one of them.
00:40:26.800 --> 00:40:27.199
Yeah, same here.
00:40:27.280 --> 00:40:27.920
I did civil engineering.
00:40:28.159 --> 00:40:30.079
Right now, it's I did industrial engineering.
00:40:30.239 --> 00:40:30.719
There you go.
00:40:31.360 --> 00:40:38.719
You know, right now it's more of we need to make money, we have responsibilities, you need to create a life for yourself and all of that.
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:49.519
Will you say having that one career that you're known for, or you double down on, open the doors for others around?
00:40:49.760 --> 00:40:54.960
Because um, you started with banking, you didn't start with like five or ten things, I can assume.
00:40:55.599 --> 00:40:58.559
You also started with our assume maybe one or two things.
00:40:58.719 --> 00:41:06.400
So, we is it something you advise or you advise younger people out there to say, you know what, double down on one, and then you can now spread your tentacles.
00:41:06.960 --> 00:41:07.920
Okay, I won't go first.
00:41:08.480 --> 00:41:20.159
For me, I'll say, like I say again, your nine to five takes care of your survival, and a good nine to five can give you a good survival, yeah, right.
00:41:20.960 --> 00:41:24.320
But it doesn't create generational wealth.
00:41:24.639 --> 00:41:35.920
The fact that your dad rose to be the chairman of a bank in Nigeria doesn't mean that his child and one day they can wake up, literally, and tell you you gotta go.
00:41:36.400 --> 00:41:46.320
And that's one of the problems you see with a lot of the older generation now, our parents, they don't want you know, they don't want to leave because the reality is they don't know anything else.
00:41:46.719 --> 00:41:52.960
Now, I'll also like to just point out not everybody has the privilege that we have.
00:41:53.280 --> 00:42:04.800
You know, like I said, if not for the fact that somebody took a picture and I went viral, I'll probably still be a one one trick pony, pure finance, trying to make the most out of it, you know.
00:42:05.039 --> 00:42:14.480
But I'm I'm at a stage now where some of my colleagues have said, oh, um, I'm going to retire in a few years, we're going to look for some consultancy roles and sit on the board.
00:42:14.559 --> 00:42:15.519
And I'm like, Mio.
00:42:16.000 --> 00:42:17.119
I just signed a new deal.
00:42:17.360 --> 00:42:20.239
I'm still, you know, that's my that's my passion.
00:42:20.800 --> 00:42:27.199
So, first of all, it's important we know our limitations in life, in our careers.
00:42:27.760 --> 00:42:33.920
Because if you don't get me wrong, some people fall on their feet, you know, they land on their feet and they just fly with it.
00:42:34.159 --> 00:42:37.760
But for the most of us, we have to work hard at what we do.
00:42:38.000 --> 00:42:43.199
So if you're nine to five, there's nothing wrong with you pursuing your nine to five.
00:42:43.280 --> 00:42:44.639
Because I'll tell you this.
00:42:46.159 --> 00:42:53.920
If I was not the CEO of a financial services company, when that picture was taken, right, I would not be here.
00:42:54.159 --> 00:43:01.440
Because the shock when we read the stories the following day was like, this guy, now MDO, now financial.
00:43:03.760 --> 00:43:04.079
True.
00:43:04.480 --> 00:43:10.960
If you were just a if I was just a consultant, and if you didn't have tattoos, but that's the whole point.
00:43:11.119 --> 00:43:13.920
An MD with earrings and tattoos.
00:43:14.079 --> 00:43:14.960
Who is this nigga?
00:43:15.119 --> 00:43:16.159
At a cultural event.
00:43:16.320 --> 00:43:28.079
If you could, if you go back onto my page, the Monday, the Monday after I went, I hit the frame, there was a picture of a woman by my the lift in my company.
00:43:28.239 --> 00:43:29.440
And on it's on Instagram.
00:43:29.760 --> 00:43:30.000
Yes.
00:43:30.239 --> 00:43:31.679
I was walking to the lift.
00:43:31.840 --> 00:43:33.599
I remember that company that I've been walking on.
00:43:33.840 --> 00:43:34.559
She has seen you every day.
00:43:34.639 --> 00:43:35.280
She's seen me every day.
00:43:35.360 --> 00:43:35.840
She did not know me.
00:43:36.079 --> 00:43:37.119
I remember that particular one.
00:43:37.760 --> 00:43:40.079
Wait, if you I said, what are you doing?
00:43:40.239 --> 00:43:40.880
That was really funny.
00:43:43.199 --> 00:43:44.000
I said, What are you doing?
00:43:44.079 --> 00:43:48.639
I said, I've been coming here for how many years.
00:43:51.360 --> 00:43:55.119
She was recording on Instagram, she was recording, said, I'm somebody.
00:43:55.599 --> 00:44:00.639
I'm somebody you just See me.
00:44:00.960 --> 00:44:01.519
You understand?
00:44:01.599 --> 00:44:02.719
So it's important.
00:44:03.119 --> 00:44:04.159
You gotta have that base.
00:44:04.559 --> 00:44:07.440
If you're building a house, you gotta have that firm foundation.
00:44:07.679 --> 00:44:13.679
Sometimes it is from your nine to five graft that the opportunities arise.
00:44:13.760 --> 00:44:14.480
Yeah, a lot of times.
00:44:16.159 --> 00:44:17.840
You know, the opportunities arise.
00:44:18.800 --> 00:44:27.840
And also, sometimes your nine to five gives you the skills to be able to assess whether the opportunities that have been presented to you are worth pursuing.
00:44:27.920 --> 00:44:28.079
Yeah.
00:44:28.320 --> 00:44:29.199
You understand what I'm saying?
00:44:29.280 --> 00:44:33.039
So your nine to five, your foundation is Coco, then whatever.
00:44:33.280 --> 00:44:37.679
And it also gives you the opportunity to say, no, thank you, but no, thank you.
00:44:37.760 --> 00:44:38.000
Yeah.
00:44:38.159 --> 00:44:39.280
You know, that's not for me.
00:44:39.599 --> 00:44:40.400
Wise words.
00:44:40.559 --> 00:44:44.400
So I this is what I want to say about that.
00:44:45.039 --> 00:44:48.480
The first thing is you actually said it yourself.
00:44:48.719 --> 00:44:51.920
Whatever your hands find to do, do it well.
00:44:52.480 --> 00:44:54.079
Do it with all of your heart.
00:44:54.400 --> 00:44:59.760
Whatever the door that God has placed in front of you, march through that door and make the most of that opportunity.
00:44:59.840 --> 00:45:00.159
Yes.
00:45:00.320 --> 00:45:04.960
It is he that has been faithful in little that will eventually be given much.
00:45:05.599 --> 00:45:11.440
If you want to be a business owner someday, how are you behaving as an employee, as a worker?
00:45:11.519 --> 00:45:11.679
Yeah.
00:45:11.920 --> 00:45:16.079
If you want to own your own home someday, how do you treat the place that you are renting?
00:45:17.039 --> 00:45:23.360
It's those intangibles, the diligence, the discipline, the commitment, the showing up when it's not sexy.
00:45:24.000 --> 00:45:30.400
It's just chipping away at life that eventually more doors begin to open for you.
00:45:30.639 --> 00:45:34.559
Everybody that's sitting around this table, we studied different things.
00:45:34.639 --> 00:45:35.599
I studied engineering.
00:45:35.760 --> 00:45:36.880
I studied engineering.
00:45:37.119 --> 00:45:38.239
You studied what did you study?
00:45:38.400 --> 00:45:38.639
Finance.
00:45:38.880 --> 00:45:39.119
Finance.
00:45:39.519 --> 00:45:40.400
You studied law.
00:45:40.800 --> 00:45:45.519
None of us have ended up doing what we primarily studied in school.
00:45:45.599 --> 00:45:54.400
But what happens is school teaches you, and I know not everybody has the chance to go to school, and that's that's that's a very valid challenge that people face.
00:45:54.559 --> 00:45:59.519
But for the people that do have it, it just teaches you problem solving.
00:45:59.679 --> 00:46:05.840
It teaches you to be a thinker, it teaches you to evaluate, to present, to package yourself, to solve challenges.
00:46:06.000 --> 00:46:07.920
That's really all it does.
00:46:08.079 --> 00:46:14.639
And then life comes at you, and then it's like, which door do I have in front of me that I can at least take this step?
00:46:14.800 --> 00:46:15.840
And you take that step.
00:46:15.920 --> 00:46:18.800
And in that taking that step, other doors begin to open.
00:46:18.880 --> 00:46:21.280
And I think that's the message here.
00:46:21.360 --> 00:46:23.840
So if it's school that you have, do it.
00:46:24.079 --> 00:46:30.480
If it's uh your original first job as a whatever role, you're an intern, you're a volunteer somewhere, do it.
00:46:30.880 --> 00:46:36.239
And show diligence and commitment and discipline and character there.
00:46:36.559 --> 00:46:40.719
And then things will start to, you will just see that things will start to take shape.
00:46:40.800 --> 00:46:51.599
Uh uh, all of us here have had different iterations of our journey from where we started in school to what we started off doing to things just kind of taking shape.
00:46:51.679 --> 00:46:56.880
I remember when you came out of the big brother house, you came to the office and we had a long great conversation.
00:46:57.119 --> 00:47:01.920
And what I told you was the winner of the show is not the winner of the show.
00:47:02.320 --> 00:47:04.639
The winner of the show is the person that wins in life.
00:47:04.800 --> 00:47:06.320
See the winner of Big Brother here.
00:47:08.559 --> 00:47:16.000
Because it's like, what do you do with the doors that are doors that are placed in front of you?
00:47:16.159 --> 00:47:35.440
How do you make the most of every day, of every opportunity, and just take it one step at a time, and then you will start to see other opportunities present themselves, you know, and it takes a bit for me, it takes your relationship with God and just sensing when it's time to pivot, when it's time to grow.
00:47:35.679 --> 00:47:46.960
But it starts from that place of commitment and discipline with whatever it is, whether it's school or your first job making minimum wage, if you are not faithful there, it's even scriptural.
00:47:47.360 --> 00:47:48.639
God will not trust you with the big things.
00:47:49.039 --> 00:47:53.119
The day that David was going to kill Goliath, he was still a shepherd boy.
00:47:53.280 --> 00:47:56.960
He had had a promise, he had been anointed as king, fine, but he was still a shepherd boy.
00:47:57.039 --> 00:48:00.320
They said, Come, carry the supplies to your brothers in the army.
00:48:00.559 --> 00:48:02.239
And he was just being diligent.
00:48:02.320 --> 00:48:09.039
And he said, It's the Bible actually says he left his stuff with the keeper of things and then goes to go and deliver this errand.
00:48:09.119 --> 00:48:11.599
Some of us will say, Why do you why is it mean that this is a good one?
00:48:11.679 --> 00:48:12.400
Why are you sending me?
00:48:12.480 --> 00:48:13.199
Why are you sending me?
00:48:13.440 --> 00:48:15.519
So you don't know the day that destiny will knock.
00:48:15.679 --> 00:48:18.880
Even a bone stee's career, right?
00:48:19.199 --> 00:48:20.960
He's been going to that festival.
00:48:21.119 --> 00:48:22.320
Yeah, I've known him a long time.
00:48:23.119 --> 00:48:24.320
He has been going there every year.
00:48:24.480 --> 00:48:25.039
Yeah.
00:48:25.440 --> 00:48:30.480
Just you don't know the day that God will say, Okay, let's change them for you.
00:48:30.639 --> 00:48:31.360
Now let's go.
00:48:31.519 --> 00:48:37.119
But if you are not found there on that day, you might miss what the opportunity that might change your life.
00:48:47.360 --> 00:48:49.679
Drawing from exactly where you ended that conversation.
00:48:50.639 --> 00:48:53.599
When do you know it's time to change your career?
00:48:54.079 --> 00:48:55.440
Very, very important question.
00:48:55.599 --> 00:48:56.480
What do you think?
00:48:56.800 --> 00:49:06.559
Because why I said it's very important, it's also why it's also because I've always wondered about the conversation we're having earlier about doubling down.
00:49:06.639 --> 00:49:06.960
Yeah.
00:49:07.119 --> 00:49:11.599
You know, when you are good at something, when you're passionate about something, double down, make sure it works.
00:49:11.840 --> 00:49:18.559
But also when something is done for you, we've seen so many people who have some of the best voices in the world, yeah.
00:49:19.280 --> 00:49:27.679
Who are not successful at well, you can't you don't want to tell them, you can't tell them they're not talented at this thing, but it's not working.
00:49:27.760 --> 00:49:28.400
Yeah.
00:49:28.639 --> 00:49:42.960
Um, it's not, I don't want to say commercially viable, but it's not just like the path, you're not looking at this is what you were actually so how do you pivot from what you know, yeah, and the world knows is your talent to say this is not for me.
00:49:43.199 --> 00:49:43.679
Prayer.
00:49:43.760 --> 00:49:44.639
Yeah, yeah.
00:49:44.880 --> 00:49:58.079
But if we're being realistic, I know prayer, prayer is, but there are people who don't, who are not religious people who say clarity in whatever ways, and they just when do you tell that person stop?
00:49:58.559 --> 00:50:00.960
And I say this because so it happened to me.
00:50:01.280 --> 00:50:10.960
We've had an earlier episode about mental health, and I talked about a phase when I because I never sought proper counsel.
00:50:11.119 --> 00:50:16.320
I don't know if I was actually depressed or if I was close to depression, but I was sharing that bubble around now.
00:50:16.800 --> 00:50:18.559
Now money was money released.
00:50:18.880 --> 00:50:24.000
But it was also a time when I asked myself a lot of questions is this path worth it?
00:50:24.159 --> 00:50:26.639
This TV saver, now me speak English pass.
00:50:26.960 --> 00:50:34.639
Yeah, and I started asking myself those questions of is it time to find something else to do?
00:50:35.440 --> 00:50:37.679
And eventually it worked out for me.
00:50:37.840 --> 00:50:45.760
But I know I heard a lot of sensible to me at the time talk saying, maybe you should.
00:50:46.000 --> 00:50:49.280
And I had literal things that I could have just pivoted to.
00:50:49.599 --> 00:50:51.039
Thankfully, it worked out for me.
00:50:51.280 --> 00:51:06.159
But there are a lot of people who are in those spaces who will hold on because okay, it worked for Eboka because Eboka stayed and it now happened, but it might not necessarily be their story, which is why this question is very important for me.
00:51:06.239 --> 00:51:09.679
Because I've had someone come up to me without saying, Oh, you weathered it.
00:51:09.760 --> 00:51:15.360
Yeah, so I should weather it, but it's not necessarily the answer.
00:51:15.599 --> 00:51:17.519
Okay, so I don't know where the answer comes from.
00:51:17.679 --> 00:51:25.039
Okay, I will share my story with you, and it also relates to this whole thing about being a guy in Niger.
00:51:25.519 --> 00:51:27.760
Niger people men will know they like to talk.
00:51:28.000 --> 00:51:28.719
You understand what I mean?
00:51:28.880 --> 00:51:30.079
That's why we call you people here.
00:51:31.440 --> 00:51:32.400
Men know they like to talk.
00:51:32.639 --> 00:51:34.000
Everybody holds their story.
00:51:34.239 --> 00:51:39.920
I whether it is good, bad, or indifferent, whether there's something that's good for Niger, you just hide.
00:51:40.480 --> 00:51:46.239
In my case, maybe as a result of my illness, I got a good bunch of people around me.
00:51:46.480 --> 00:51:50.480
I call them my ride or dyes, I've got them tattooed on my show, on my on my arm there.
00:51:51.039 --> 00:51:52.639
There's a good bunch of people.
00:51:52.800 --> 00:51:54.159
I can tell you this.
00:51:54.639 --> 00:52:00.320
Within 48 hours of me blowing at Ojudioba, I had a meeting with my guys.
00:52:00.559 --> 00:52:05.280
I won't mention their names, but they are sorry to you come back to the story.
00:52:05.440 --> 00:52:10.079
But you said you had a million guys and they came down to 100 when you had the didn't know those guys come back when you blew.
00:52:10.320 --> 00:52:12.800
Yes, now they're space.
00:52:15.039 --> 00:52:18.960
That's why you're reading just you keep smiling, but you put them in their compartment.
00:52:19.119 --> 00:52:19.840
They didn't know where they are.
00:52:20.480 --> 00:52:21.920
If they don't know, they better know now.
00:52:25.360 --> 00:52:28.159
Now they know in their compartment.
00:52:29.920 --> 00:52:37.840
Uh you know, I put them in their compartment.
00:52:38.880 --> 00:52:43.280
I put them in my so I was actually with one of them last night.
00:52:43.440 --> 00:52:45.360
Uh one of the returnees.
00:52:45.440 --> 00:52:47.280
No, no, one of my G's.
00:52:47.679 --> 00:52:48.880
One of my G's.
00:52:49.119 --> 00:52:51.599
One of my G's, you know, returnees.
00:52:52.000 --> 00:52:56.719
And and these are guys that they called me and said, Farooq, we need to meet.
00:52:56.960 --> 00:52:58.159
We met up.
00:52:58.480 --> 00:52:59.519
This is your thing.
00:52:59.760 --> 00:53:01.519
Uh, you don't know what's really happening here.
00:53:01.599 --> 00:53:02.719
We've seen it before.
00:53:02.880 --> 00:53:04.480
Let me just put it in perspective.
00:53:04.639 --> 00:53:12.159
These guys own their own private jets, so they're not small boys in Lagos, so these are not, these are um no names, but these are not yeah on full price.
00:53:12.400 --> 00:53:16.480
Yeah, say, bro, you don't know what's going on here.
00:53:16.960 --> 00:53:18.960
Come, we know your story.
00:53:20.159 --> 00:53:25.519
Do you want to go this your new social media thing, or do you want to stick in finance?
00:53:25.599 --> 00:53:26.559
We had a heart to heart.
00:53:26.639 --> 00:53:29.440
I was like, social media now, somebody else go blow next week.
00:53:29.519 --> 00:53:32.320
I don't work out, I've been working all my life for this.
00:53:33.199 --> 00:53:34.880
So, you really want to go?
00:53:36.159 --> 00:53:37.280
You want to stay in finance?
00:53:37.360 --> 00:53:38.320
I said, Yes.
00:53:38.880 --> 00:53:41.280
They said, because you know finance people are going to come for you.
00:53:41.440 --> 00:53:42.320
You've always been controversial.
00:53:42.400 --> 00:53:47.039
You've been they call me the Alan Iverson of Nigerian Finance, the bad boy of finance.
00:53:47.119 --> 00:53:50.320
I don't dress like them, I don't wear ties, I got my ear, you know.
00:53:50.400 --> 00:53:51.760
Will you see me after five?
00:53:52.159 --> 00:53:54.480
You know, I'm that's the kind of person I am.
00:53:54.719 --> 00:53:58.719
And they we spoke for at length, and they said, Okay, you know what?
00:53:58.800 --> 00:53:59.920
You need to go on TV.
00:54:00.079 --> 00:54:01.119
We'll make a plan.
00:54:01.360 --> 00:54:03.440
That weekend, I was on Arise TV.
00:54:03.519 --> 00:54:15.679
And if you go back and watch that interview, every five seconds I kept on saying, I like my job, uh, Nigeria Finance, I'm there, you know, I'm lawyer because I was trying to send a message.
00:54:16.639 --> 00:54:24.800
I have been lucky that I have a group of people around me that keep me ten toes down at all times.
00:54:25.119 --> 00:54:32.000
And I think if Nigerians, it's difficult, and not everybody is blessed to have that.
00:54:32.480 --> 00:54:40.079
But the first step, you know, the journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step share your story, talk to people.
00:54:40.400 --> 00:54:48.079
Because something happened, you want to hide it, pick your people around you, pick good people around you, share.
00:54:48.239 --> 00:54:50.639
It could be your wife, it could be my your son.
00:54:50.800 --> 00:54:56.320
I speak to my son's my son has moved back, son of Stees is now in my house, he moved back from London, he's now in my house.
00:54:59.039 --> 00:55:00.800
You wrote with me at a Judy Ba last year.
00:55:00.960 --> 00:55:04.320
Now I said, Daddy, uh-uh, this thing is going on.
00:55:04.880 --> 00:55:07.920
You see how, you know, it's you know, one of those things.
00:55:08.000 --> 00:55:15.440
I'm like, guy, you talk, we chat, you get hear people's opinions because nobody has all the answers.
00:55:16.079 --> 00:55:24.880
And I think once you start to learn to share your story and your experiences and seek advice, you the path will become clearer.
00:55:25.199 --> 00:55:31.760
I tell you this, up until recently, I was still thinking, Manky, you and I still had this chat earlier this morning.
00:55:32.000 --> 00:55:35.760
Up until recently, I thought, well, I can do both, you know.
00:55:35.920 --> 00:55:49.360
But the reality is, if you got you, if if the if the situation comes whereby you cannot give 100% to all your various ventures, you got to make a choice, which is what we're talking about this morning.
00:55:49.519 --> 00:55:58.079
But for me, the biggest thing for me about knowing when to pivot, as you say, was talking to people and being realistic with myself.
00:55:58.239 --> 00:56:00.079
It's like a heavyweight boxer.
00:56:00.960 --> 00:56:07.119
You've won everything, you retire, you now want to come back, and then one small boy goes and beats you.
00:56:07.360 --> 00:56:08.559
You understand what I'm saying?
00:56:08.719 --> 00:56:11.840
You need to know when enough is enough.
00:56:12.000 --> 00:56:17.760
Don't be fooled by the fact that uh, you know, you are once a heavyweight champion of the world, da da da.
00:56:18.719 --> 00:56:20.400
You know when to call it quits.
00:56:20.480 --> 00:56:24.079
And that is a very, very hard decision to make.
00:56:24.239 --> 00:56:31.360
And the only people that have the balls to tell you when to call it quits are those that you surround yourself with.
00:56:31.599 --> 00:56:32.559
That's my opinion.
00:56:32.960 --> 00:56:33.920
Very wise words.
00:56:34.079 --> 00:56:43.199
I would say this for me, first of all, it's clear that the journey of life and the journey of faith and all of that is filled with uncertainty, right?
00:56:43.280 --> 00:56:49.199
That's that's really why you need faith, because you don't know a hundred percent for sure where everything is going.
00:56:49.519 --> 00:56:54.320
For me, it's three things knowledge, people, and prayer.
00:56:55.440 --> 00:57:11.760
Knowledge meaning wherever you are, there's something that you can be doing to learn, to grow, to pour into your mind, to increase your capacity to so that when you do get a chance to sit around tables, you're bringing more to the table.
00:57:11.840 --> 00:57:31.519
So even if you are focused on one thing, there's there's growth in that thing, there's more knowledge or more certifications, or more you can expand the world around that thing rather than just saying I'm talented, I can sing, and that's you know, and for some sorry, this different is for different people.
00:57:31.599 --> 00:57:34.880
Some people, you know, they have a one-track mind, and that's fine.
00:57:34.960 --> 00:57:42.480
I'm just telling you the way that I think is one gain more knowledge, read a book.
00:57:42.639 --> 00:57:47.119
We spend so much time on our phones, there's knowledge to be gained on your phones.
00:57:47.599 --> 00:57:50.239
There are sermons you can watch, there are classes you can take.
00:57:50.400 --> 00:57:53.679
Half of these things are free or at least heavily subsidized.
00:57:53.760 --> 00:57:56.880
There, you know, you can go to school online, you can gain a certification.
00:57:57.039 --> 00:57:59.519
I can't tell you how many times I've shut my world down.
00:57:59.679 --> 00:58:05.599
I say I'm going to go and do my master's, or I'm going to film school, or I'm going because I'm trying to gain knowledge.
00:58:05.840 --> 00:58:08.320
The second thing is what he touched on, which is people.
00:58:08.559 --> 00:58:12.800
Some people say you are the product of the five people you spend the most time around.
00:58:13.039 --> 00:58:14.639
So who do you spend your time around?
00:58:14.880 --> 00:58:15.280
That's true.
00:58:15.440 --> 00:58:16.480
Who do you spend time with?
00:58:16.639 --> 00:58:20.000
Who, how do you just your network?
00:58:20.079 --> 00:58:21.599
Like, who are you spending time with?
00:58:21.760 --> 00:58:28.400
And the greatest thing about the internet and technology today is you know, you can spend time with people that don't even know you.
00:58:29.199 --> 00:58:34.000
You can look at somebody and say, see, because what we talked about this on another show.
00:58:34.559 --> 00:58:40.880
Sometimes I go somewhere and I speak, and young people afterwards come to me and say, Ah, I want you to be my mentor, I want you to be my mentor.
00:58:41.440 --> 00:58:45.840
And I explain to them that the mentor actually picks the mentees.
00:58:46.320 --> 00:58:51.599
Jesus picked the disciples, uh, David picked Solomon, Elijah picked Elisha.
00:58:51.760 --> 00:58:59.440
It's it's usually the person who looks around and sees people who are working and adding value and they see something in you and they say, You know what?
00:58:59.599 --> 00:59:00.000
Come.
00:59:00.480 --> 00:59:04.079
So, what you want to do is make yourself someone of value.
00:59:04.159 --> 00:59:13.599
You want to be out there working, gaining, so that when you do meet somebody, so there are people who mentored me and and use the word loosely that never met me.
00:59:13.840 --> 00:59:20.960
But I watched everything that they ever said, I listened to every message, I watched every speech, I read every book.
00:59:21.119 --> 00:59:26.159
Because it's not the relationship would be nice, but it's not the relationship that I need, it's the wisdom.
00:59:26.559 --> 00:59:28.960
So spend time around people.
00:59:29.119 --> 00:59:30.960
If you have access to them in person, fine.
00:59:31.039 --> 00:59:34.960
If you don't, this internet has made everything that the person has ever said is nice.
00:59:36.000 --> 00:59:48.159
So go out if you're a business person that you like, buy his book, read it, watch every time that he's he's given a speech, every time that he's spoken on a panel, just go and dig out, spend time around those people.
00:59:48.239 --> 00:59:52.159
And if you if you're fortunate to have access to people in person, then spend time around them in person.
00:59:52.239 --> 00:59:57.599
But the point is gain the knowledge, you know, gain from people.
00:59:57.760 --> 01:00:00.239
And then the third one for me is prayer.
01:00:00.400 --> 01:00:04.480
And I'm not, you know, I know I represent the faith perspective on this show a lot.
01:00:05.360 --> 01:00:07.119
Because it is the reason why we prayer.
01:00:08.079 --> 01:00:18.480
But the truth of the matter is, see, nothing can tell you like this product is the maker of the product that can tell this product what is made for.
01:00:18.800 --> 01:00:23.280
How of us we don't use our phone to do the extra capacity, obviously, capability.
01:00:23.519 --> 01:00:27.760
But the person, if you watch one of these videos, they will say, Ah, do you know you can do this?
01:00:27.840 --> 01:00:28.320
You can do that.
01:00:28.400 --> 01:00:29.519
Your picture can look like this.
01:00:30.159 --> 01:00:31.920
But it's WhatsApp and text message.
01:00:32.639 --> 01:00:38.639
But the maker of the product can tell you, guy, this is all the things that this product can do.
01:00:38.960 --> 01:00:43.679
And so for the person who is searching for, is it time to just do that?
01:00:43.840 --> 01:00:46.400
Start with the person that made you, yeah.
01:00:46.559 --> 01:00:50.400
That relationship, work on that relationship, and then things will become clearer.
01:00:50.960 --> 01:00:57.599
Things will become clear, doors will open, you know, things will start to be like, oh, just not then the blessing.
01:01:01.519 --> 01:01:08.079
I mean, so for me, it's just three things.
01:01:08.159 --> 01:01:13.360
And if you're doing those three things consistently enough, it will have something has to break for you.
01:01:15.280 --> 01:01:16.000
Okay, okay, okay.
01:01:16.239 --> 01:01:19.760
I want to put you get I think it's Toby I want to put on the spot.
01:01:20.000 --> 01:01:20.159
Okay.
01:01:20.559 --> 01:01:23.760
Drum roll after shaming you.
01:01:24.880 --> 01:01:27.199
Bros, are you not tired of putting me on the spot?
01:01:27.440 --> 01:01:28.239
It never tired.
01:01:28.480 --> 01:01:29.360
It's been a long time.
01:01:31.119 --> 01:01:32.400
But I want to shame you first.
01:01:32.480 --> 01:01:32.559
Okay.
01:01:32.960 --> 01:01:40.400
Because the United Nations says that only 22% of decision-making positions are held by women in Nigeria's private sector.
01:01:40.719 --> 01:01:45.280
So that's an indictment, I believe, on the private sector in Nigeria.
01:01:45.519 --> 01:01:47.440
Um, and I'm sure you know this as facts.
01:01:47.599 --> 01:01:52.719
You sit on boards, you know how many times you walk in, and no woman or one woman.
01:01:53.039 --> 01:02:08.159
And everybody says, well, at least most of most countries' economies that have thrived will show you that women are important to a large extent.
01:02:08.320 --> 01:02:11.920
If they're half your population, you can't keep sidelining them.
01:02:12.000 --> 01:02:15.280
So that's for you to sit and marinate with and probably tell us why that is.
01:02:15.440 --> 01:02:19.920
But I wanted to come to him because he works in an industry where it's almost the opposite.
01:02:20.159 --> 01:02:20.480
Yes.
01:02:20.719 --> 01:02:25.039
Nollywood, from old Nollywood, the biggest names have always been women.
01:02:25.440 --> 01:02:30.559
Whether you're talking from Genevieve back in the day or Mozala to today, I think.
01:02:34.800 --> 01:02:36.000
Malani Austin Peter.
01:02:39.440 --> 01:02:41.519
And two of your biggest films have been with women.
01:02:41.679 --> 01:02:41.760
Yeah.
01:02:42.000 --> 01:02:45.360
Jade Oshiberu and Funkia Kindele.
01:02:46.320 --> 01:03:00.800
Um and I'm asking this because Nigeria, whether we like it or not, has culturally men have an ego around female buses, how woman go to tell me what I go to do.
01:03:00.960 --> 01:03:03.519
We've had stories on this show even where I think it was Johnny Dr.
01:03:03.599 --> 01:03:12.000
Johnny Drill who came on one of our shows talking about how he had a male driver who didn't respect his wife but would defer to him if there was a problem.
01:03:12.800 --> 01:03:18.559
We all have stories like that where so men have this how woman goes, but you have seemed to thrive.
01:03:18.800 --> 01:03:24.960
And a lot of people probably choose their careers based on uh no one work with woman or whatever it is.
01:03:25.119 --> 01:03:27.760
How do you how is that so easy for you?
01:03:28.000 --> 01:03:33.679
Is it because you found yourself in an industry or before we come to you and your posture?
01:03:34.719 --> 01:03:35.280
Don't worry.
01:03:35.440 --> 01:03:38.800
If you don't want to work with a woman, you're not, I don't believe you're ready to grow in life.
01:03:39.039 --> 01:03:41.679
Yeah, yeah, women are so powerful.
01:03:42.400 --> 01:03:45.440
Women are so like thank God for women.
01:03:45.519 --> 01:03:53.039
Uh in my industry particularly, I've worked with women and I've mocked, I've worked more with women.
01:03:53.199 --> 01:03:55.840
I mean, or you succeeded more with them.
01:03:56.000 --> 01:03:58.000
I mean, first I don't see gender.
01:03:58.239 --> 01:03:59.840
For me, I'm a banker, work is work.
01:04:00.159 --> 01:04:05.119
Like, let's, because I came into the industry with the thirst to get stuff done.
01:04:05.360 --> 01:04:11.039
Let's get the work done, let's shoot the shots, let's, you know, the creativity.
01:04:11.280 --> 01:04:12.239
Oh, I want to jump.
01:04:12.320 --> 01:04:13.679
Okay, how high can you jump?
01:04:13.840 --> 01:04:25.199
You know, and with that mindset, when I came into the industry, a lot of the women I happen to have worked with happen to be, they they welcomed me and welcomed that mentality with open arms.
01:04:25.280 --> 01:04:27.039
Yeah, there was no ego.
01:04:27.199 --> 01:04:30.800
A lot of the directors I've worked with is more of okay, you have an idea.
01:04:30.880 --> 01:04:31.840
Okay, what's your idea?
01:04:32.000 --> 01:04:34.639
Okay, this is what I have, let's balance it, let's push it together.
01:04:34.800 --> 01:04:37.360
I don't see gender, it's more of the results.
01:04:37.519 --> 01:04:40.639
So it's who is helping us get to the result more.
01:04:40.719 --> 01:04:44.400
And in our industry, you know, they look they used to look at women like the underdog.
01:04:44.480 --> 01:04:45.840
Now you see the power of the underdog.
01:04:46.000 --> 01:04:48.880
Like they've come and they've really taken up space.
01:04:49.199 --> 01:04:58.079
And not just taking up space with like a slogan, it's with actual stories like competence, numbers to show, efforts.
01:04:58.159 --> 01:05:02.000
Like you can see the amount of efforts these women actually put into their productions.
01:05:02.239 --> 01:05:09.039
So for me, now, even when I get like calls for maybe a role or anything, like that's one of the things I look out for.
01:05:09.199 --> 01:05:20.880
If a Funke should call me, Funke should call me, and she's even saying, okay, I don't have money to pay you, and somebody else is calling me for you know a larger, I'll probably go with Funke because I know we are going to grind.
01:05:21.199 --> 01:05:22.079
How much do you make again?
01:05:22.159 --> 01:05:22.719
How many billions?
01:05:24.079 --> 01:05:24.800
How about did you make?
01:05:29.280 --> 01:05:31.519
I was only paid my active fees.
01:05:37.039 --> 01:05:41.039
So I find women to be a blessing to you know every industry.
01:05:41.199 --> 01:05:47.840
Wherever there's a woman, you can sense um she didn't get there by chance or by luck.
01:05:48.000 --> 01:05:49.599
She earned the right to be there.
01:05:49.840 --> 01:06:04.559
And every step of the way they show you, they show you in terms of how they are trying to work, in terms of decisions they are making, you know, through the whole 360 of the thought process or you know, the whole You know, shebang, you will see that this woman's intentional, and this is why she's here.
01:06:04.719 --> 01:06:07.679
So I'm very fortunate to have worked with um, you know, amazing women.
01:06:07.760 --> 01:06:35.039
I'm looking forward to working with you know more amazing women, and our great men there, you know, they're also men are doing the women work, but you know, it's just you know, there's that thing of when they say they've looked at women for you know in the past and said, Oh, they can't, oh, she can't, oh, they can't, as you know, they can't attain to this, and it's more like, and they know they can, so like it's more like it's a season of what just make you guys yes, that's what we can do, and I still love it.
01:06:35.760 --> 01:06:36.320
All right.
01:06:37.119 --> 01:06:37.920
Let me tell you this.
01:06:38.079 --> 01:06:39.199
You've been marinating.
01:06:39.360 --> 01:06:41.519
No, I said it earlier on.
01:06:41.679 --> 01:06:43.280
My father died when I was four.
01:06:43.760 --> 01:06:47.760
I have an older sister, she's two years older than me, she was six.
01:06:48.000 --> 01:06:49.599
My mother was 30.
01:06:49.760 --> 01:06:49.840
Wow.
01:06:50.159 --> 01:06:50.960
When my father died.
01:06:51.039 --> 01:06:52.559
My mother never remarried.
01:06:52.880 --> 01:06:57.920
My mother, I was raised by my mother primarily with support from my dad's younger brother.
01:06:58.559 --> 01:07:02.719
After God, everything I am in my life, I put down to my mother.
01:07:02.880 --> 01:07:04.079
She's 86 years old.
01:07:04.159 --> 01:07:06.239
If you follow me, you will know that I don't play with my mother.
01:07:06.400 --> 01:07:08.079
My mother sacrificed everything.
01:07:08.320 --> 01:07:14.880
The other thing I wanted to say was I said earlier on, I'm the chairman of a female focused financial institution.
01:07:16.000 --> 01:07:20.239
Where we support, I didn't say we support men guys, we support market women.
01:07:20.559 --> 01:07:21.039
Right?
01:07:21.360 --> 01:07:25.599
I spent my formative years standing in the kitchen up until the age of 18.
01:07:25.679 --> 01:07:27.920
My mother lived in a boys' quarters in Sulli.
01:07:28.480 --> 01:07:32.960
She was the marketing director of a multinational, but everything she earned.
01:07:33.199 --> 01:07:37.360
My sister was head girl at Queen's College, I went to King's College, my mother supported me.
01:07:37.599 --> 01:07:38.239
Yes.
01:07:38.559 --> 01:07:42.559
Um, so I know the sacrifices women have made.
01:07:43.039 --> 01:07:44.639
I've also been with women.
01:07:44.719 --> 01:07:48.880
I sat my mother was the first derivatives trader in Nigeria.
01:07:49.039 --> 01:07:52.559
I I earned my stars as a derivatives trader.
01:07:52.719 --> 01:07:53.039
Wow.
01:07:53.199 --> 01:07:58.400
My mother was trading derivatives, sugar derivatives for a company called Tatan Lau.
01:08:00.159 --> 01:08:05.599
Aliku Dangote, Sheikh, uh Rabiu, Samad's father.
01:08:05.760 --> 01:08:06.960
That's how I know all of them.
01:08:07.119 --> 01:08:09.039
Because my mother was about to decor.
01:08:09.199 --> 01:08:15.519
My mother was moving sugar for these guys when I will leave school, I will sit in the office and she's trading.
01:08:16.000 --> 01:08:18.079
That's why I became a trader, not a banker.
01:08:18.720 --> 01:08:19.039
Okay.
01:08:19.520 --> 01:08:25.279
So I have seen, I'm blessed to have seen the sacrifices women have made.
01:08:25.600 --> 01:08:43.199
And I actually personally think that women are more rational when it comes to making decisions than men, particularly in financial services, because they're coming from a position whereby they're deemed I say this very carefully, irrelevant because of our culture.
01:08:43.600 --> 01:08:49.600
Women always expectedly so expected to take a secondary position, particularly in the corporate space.
01:08:50.079 --> 01:09:15.279
You look at, I was at the Nigerian Stock NGX Exchange to celebrate um International Women's Day, Funkia Kindele was there, um First Lady of Imo State was there, um the Minister of State for Foreign Affairs, Bianca Ujuku, was there, and a lot of women who have made significant strides in financial services.
01:09:15.680 --> 01:09:23.920
Because I believe, because of our cultural inclinations, we don't mix business with pleasure.
01:09:25.439 --> 01:09:38.479
You don't mix business with pleasure, but as a as a male dominated uh society, we always feel that the role of the women, or certain people feel the role of the women, is in the kitchen.
01:09:38.800 --> 01:10:02.800
I personally believe that a lot of women, women who finally, when you see a woman that has achieved and attained uh C-suite level, executive level in corporate Nigeria, you need to sit down with her and find out what she's been through because I can tell you this she has fought battles that none of us men in this room have fought, and she's overcome.
01:10:03.119 --> 01:10:07.119
There are many strong women in this country, and they need to be given their props.
01:10:07.520 --> 01:10:09.600
So let me say you dishame me.
01:10:09.760 --> 01:10:14.000
I, in my one of my side hustles, I'm the chairman of a company.
01:10:14.079 --> 01:10:20.800
I'm not gonna mention the name, but it is prime, I said it earlier on before you asked the question, primarily focused on women.
01:10:21.039 --> 01:10:38.319
I go to markets and I stand in front of market women and I preach the gospel to them because the women in this country have so much power and so much to give for the towards the development of this country.
01:10:38.560 --> 01:10:40.079
They don't even know it themselves.
01:10:40.319 --> 01:10:47.359
And sometimes you need to just tell them to their faces that, well, mommy, Auntie, we need you.
01:10:47.520 --> 01:10:50.640
You don't know what I will back you, I will support you.
01:10:50.880 --> 01:11:04.079
You know, you're right, the statistics speak for themselves, but it's up to people like us, and the entertainment space has been one area where women have excelled, yeah, they run that show.
01:11:04.399 --> 01:11:07.199
But not entertainments, Nollywood, not music, not really.
01:11:07.439 --> 01:11:26.159
Okay, maybe not, okay, maybe Nollywood, but I can also tell you this that given the opportunities, if they judged, because like I said, what they have to go through, yeah, they have a tougher job, they have a tougher journey to get to where we are than the male, their male counterparts.
01:11:26.239 --> 01:11:29.039
Yeah, and you know, I give them their props.
01:11:29.840 --> 01:11:32.239
A lot of my friends say, ah, your mommy's boy because your mother raised you.
01:11:32.479 --> 01:11:33.119
I don't care.
01:11:33.279 --> 01:11:36.399
Because without my mom and God, I would not be where I am, and I gotta give her props.
01:11:36.479 --> 01:11:39.520
Yeah, but there are many strong women out there, yeah.
01:11:39.680 --> 01:11:43.600
And when you see a woman, we use funky funky akidele, balay or st.
01:11:48.640 --> 01:11:51.039
Yes, why I was with recently, you know.
01:11:51.760 --> 01:11:53.600
You gotta give you gotta give them the project.
01:11:55.039 --> 01:11:56.399
No, no, no, no, no, no, you help me now.
01:11:56.640 --> 01:11:56.880
Thank you.
01:11:57.039 --> 01:12:09.760
You gotta give them the profs because these women have a lot to offer, and their journey, if you take the time to listen to their journey, they've had to deal with you know the stereotypes, all kinds of stuff.
01:12:10.000 --> 01:12:14.159
And um, hopefully, we're beginning to change that narrative.
01:12:14.399 --> 01:12:20.880
You know, Evoka, hopefully, we change that narrative and we give the women the position that they truly deserve.
01:12:21.119 --> 01:12:22.960
Can I just say something about this issue?
01:12:23.119 --> 01:12:28.880
I think there's also a massive problem when it comes to public service and the leadership of the country.
01:12:29.039 --> 01:12:29.359
Yep.
01:12:29.600 --> 01:12:33.439
In terms of women getting into elected positions of power.
01:12:33.680 --> 01:12:36.000
We would have even been or even appointed.
01:12:36.159 --> 01:12:41.359
I think we have a massive problem when you see how many House of Repsies have been.
01:12:41.520 --> 01:12:44.000
I know that they've been appointed, how they've been treated, no names mentioned.
01:12:44.399 --> 01:12:45.199
Yes, I mean there's that.
01:12:45.600 --> 01:12:46.800
Elected is one of the lowest in the world.
01:12:47.199 --> 01:12:48.000
You know what's so funny?
01:12:48.079 --> 01:12:54.000
And it's it's not just at that level of government, it's actually it cascades all the way down.
01:12:54.079 --> 01:13:01.680
So I was running a campaign and I had these two relatively young people who, you know, they're in their 30s, but they're brilliant.
01:13:01.920 --> 01:13:04.399
One was a guy and one was a girl.
01:13:04.640 --> 01:13:07.600
Um uh Aziz Quadri and Taiwo Titoju.
01:13:07.840 --> 01:13:28.319
And I'd Taiwo specifically had worked with both of them in different capacities over the years, but Taiwo actually, we we did Lecky Food Bank from the COVID time together, and she was so instrumental in all of us coming together and doing that amazing thing that we did, that when it was time to run for office, there was no doubt in my mind that I wanted to work with these two people.
01:13:28.880 --> 01:13:35.039
And I remember, you know, when I appointed them, like basically in charge of the entire campaign.
01:13:35.439 --> 01:13:50.479
The people in the grassroots and in the different levels of politics were so confused that she was that Taiwo wasn't there just to do like women's affairs, share food, organize the women when they're coming to say.
01:13:54.399 --> 01:14:05.680
And the men too, in at in some, not everywhere, but in in a if quite a few quarters were confused, and they would want to bypass her to come to me or want to only speak to Aziz.
01:14:06.000 --> 01:14:11.039
And they would come to men and I'll say, no, go back and talk to Taiwo about this thing.
01:14:11.279 --> 01:14:14.560
And she did a phenomenal job running the campaign.
01:14:14.640 --> 01:14:39.920
And and right now she's studying public policy in the UK, and I have high hopes for her, and it's just like we have to get to the place as a society because it's weird and it's hypocritical because we all love our mothers and we love our daughters and we love our sisters, but somehow there's this disconnect between saying, Oh, yeah, I love my mom and I love my daughter, or I love my sister, but then I'm not meant to answer to a woman.
01:14:40.079 --> 01:14:42.079
Yes, or answer and it's wrong.
01:14:42.399 --> 01:14:53.279
And it actually took me getting married to realize how bad the problem was, because you know, we'd be out and about, and guys would be like, ah, Mr.
01:14:53.439 --> 01:14:57.520
W, that's and they would almost not even know that my wife is there.
01:14:57.600 --> 01:15:05.119
Or you ever pull up to somewhere with a car and they want to help you park your car, and they will now come to the man's side to open the door for you.
01:15:05.279 --> 01:15:06.800
You and your wife did the same motto.
01:15:07.279 --> 01:15:10.960
And I'm like, You're a gentleman, open the door for the woman.
01:15:11.119 --> 01:15:11.760
Do you understand?
01:15:12.000 --> 01:15:24.079
So it's like there's this challenge that we have as a society, I think, in respecting and honoring the place of women and giving them opportunities to lead.
01:15:24.159 --> 01:15:24.880
There's actually a bill.
01:15:25.359 --> 01:15:25.760
I got you.
01:15:25.840 --> 01:15:26.000
Thanks.
01:15:26.319 --> 01:15:28.159
And I forgot the exact name of the bill.
01:15:28.239 --> 01:15:32.640
It's it's an affirmative action bill that's being considered in the legislature right now.
01:15:32.880 --> 01:15:35.199
Yeah, we're not trying to have like elective positions for just women.
01:15:35.600 --> 01:15:38.239
Do we add elective positions just for women?
01:15:38.560 --> 01:15:53.199
If that's the only way they're gonna be able to do that, yes, even if it's just for like, let's say, maybe four cycles of elections, to just get women in there to see that they have seats at the table in their own chairs, and they have a voice.
01:15:53.840 --> 01:16:01.439
Every president promises it's not even 50, 35 appointments whenever they win elections.
01:16:01.600 --> 01:16:07.840
Almost, I think only one has ever met it in our national history.
01:16:08.079 --> 01:16:13.039
Yeah, it's just like which is very I would give you 35%, and then you see the appointments is like 20.
01:16:13.199 --> 01:16:14.720
Sometimes it's very sad.
01:16:14.960 --> 01:16:16.960
This is appointment, but it would do better now.
01:16:17.199 --> 01:16:17.680
That's very good.
01:16:17.760 --> 01:16:18.239
That's very sad.
01:16:18.640 --> 01:16:22.479
They need to understand that just anything small you put, it's multiplies.
01:16:22.640 --> 01:16:26.560
Yes, you put something, and next nine months, big fine baby.
01:16:26.720 --> 01:16:30.000
Come on, you need to, you know, pluck the seed and let the money.
01:16:38.560 --> 01:16:40.479
Who is doing a fantastic job?
01:16:40.640 --> 01:16:54.159
Um, I had the privilege of having a sit-down with her at the West African Economic Summit in Abuja, and you know, the amount of um, you know, she's she's creating something.
01:16:54.560 --> 01:16:58.159
The power of the creative industries is crazy.
01:16:58.720 --> 01:17:08.880
Um, there there was a there were and and hopefully the with the women making strides in the creative industry, we can they can leverage on that.
01:17:09.119 --> 01:17:15.840
There was a there was an um a report by the Nigerian Council of Arts and Culture, National Council of Arts and Culture.
01:17:16.560 --> 01:17:25.680
In 2024, when I blew out of Judy Oba, the amount of sponsorship was about 200 million naira.
01:17:26.640 --> 01:17:31.279
Last year, 2025, it was about 2.5 billion.
01:17:32.800 --> 01:17:35.840
That's in the create as a result of the creative space.
01:17:36.239 --> 01:17:44.880
And the council made a mention that they were trying to sort of show the power of the creative industry in Nigeria.
01:17:45.039 --> 01:17:57.199
Now, I'm hoping and I'm praying, because the women are so strong in the creative space, they can leverage on that to end up getting a seat at the table.
01:17:57.359 --> 01:17:58.960
Obviously, policy comes into it.
01:17:59.039 --> 01:18:04.800
Yeah, government, not just appointed positions, but also elective positions.
01:18:04.960 --> 01:18:08.960
When a woman female candidate speaks in front of, look around you.
01:18:09.119 --> 01:18:12.159
We don't have a female governor, we have lots of female deputy governors.
01:18:12.319 --> 01:18:15.039
We have never had a female governor, almost 70 years old as well.
01:18:15.359 --> 01:18:17.359
We have lots of female deputy governors, yeah.
01:18:17.520 --> 01:18:27.920
But you will now find out that when the when the current governor have having done eight years with a female deputy, when he's about to move, sometimes you know they reach eight years.
01:18:28.479 --> 01:18:31.840
But even though when he wants to move and go to the Senate, right?
01:18:33.279 --> 01:18:44.640
When they move to go to the Senate, instead of saying that the woman who has been your support system for the last eight years is qualified, you go pick a third party.
01:18:44.880 --> 01:18:53.520
It's about time these women had a seat at the table and they were in charge of the policies, and hopefully we'll see that happening.
01:18:53.920 --> 01:18:58.000
I feel we're in the right direction because um the creative space kind of shapes culture.
01:18:58.239 --> 01:18:58.800
Absolutely.
01:18:58.960 --> 01:19:01.920
So now I mean there's a lot of respect.
01:19:02.239 --> 01:19:08.880
Respect because of us, I've got also sorry you guys just also maybe because we are very materialistic in Nigeria, 100%.
01:19:09.199 --> 01:19:10.960
We like money, everything is about how much.
01:19:11.119 --> 01:19:17.840
But money's free to people start seeing these figures from women, and then Peter then they're like, okay, it's adjournable.
01:19:18.159 --> 01:19:27.920
You know, you watch a movie, and oh, who made it the quality of the story you know if you came here as a food, also have the photo.
01:19:28.000 --> 01:19:28.640
This is this word.
01:19:31.600 --> 01:19:49.199
Hello, allow me, and also in the storytelling, you can see you know, we are representing women better in the light that they currently like the current the modern day woman being represented well.
01:19:49.359 --> 01:19:59.279
So people are watching new content, new movies, and understanding that oh, a woman can really be anything, a woman can be your boss, a woman can be your colleague, you know, it doesn't matter.
01:19:59.680 --> 01:20:06.079
So I feel like we're you know in the right trajectory to actually just just to round us up before we conclude.
01:20:06.239 --> 01:20:23.680
Um, I saw a poll, it's not a Nigerian poster, but I think it's that kind of speaks to what we are saying, okay, which is interesting because not even Nigerian police, but I Axios published this poll from lean in dot org and says 60% of male managers are uncomfortable working with women.
01:20:25.119 --> 01:20:27.760
I feel like that's something to marinate on.
01:20:27.920 --> 01:20:38.079
I don't know why that is, but it's I think I wonder if it's a is it a perception thing, is it uh an ego thing?
01:20:38.479 --> 01:20:51.760
Personally, um I would say it's an ego thing, um and it stems from in many cases insecurities on the part of the male.
01:20:52.319 --> 01:21:03.199
Um I have had one of my most supportive bosses in Nigeria was a female when I came.
01:21:03.279 --> 01:21:06.960
I when I moved back to Nigeria to join the Nigerian Stock Exchange.
01:21:07.199 --> 01:21:11.680
The the the the DG MDC was a lady called Indio Kirake when you came.
01:21:12.000 --> 01:21:15.199
If you know her big woman, powerful woman, legend woman, legendary.
01:21:16.000 --> 01:21:19.920
She she we had a meeting.
01:21:21.039 --> 01:21:23.680
Um I was abroad, I met her abroad.
01:21:23.840 --> 01:21:25.600
She said, Farook, da-da-da-da.
01:21:25.840 --> 01:21:34.079
I've heard about you, you want to come back to and she said, I said, if you do this to this, I'll pull up.
01:21:34.640 --> 01:21:37.920
I flew to Nigeria, I arrived in Nigeria, and I got my job.
01:21:38.000 --> 01:21:40.319
I was a senior executive at the Nigerian Stock Exchange.
01:21:40.560 --> 01:21:44.960
What the point I'm trying to make is I know the battles that she fought.
01:21:45.279 --> 01:21:49.199
She fought battles, she had my back 24-7.
01:21:50.640 --> 01:21:58.640
They said all kinds of stories, but she had my back, and to today I respect her so much.
01:21:58.880 --> 01:22:00.720
My mother, too, obviously.
01:22:01.039 --> 01:22:08.560
And I think a lot of men have to get over this, you know, it's uh it's uh it's an ego thing, you know.
01:22:08.640 --> 01:22:09.199
Who am I?
01:22:09.279 --> 01:22:14.319
And some people say it's linked with culture, you know, the woman is supposed to be in the kitchen.
01:22:14.479 --> 01:22:16.159
So who are we talking about drivers?
01:22:16.239 --> 01:22:18.960
You're drive some drivers will not open the doors for a woman.
01:22:19.199 --> 01:22:23.359
So who are you to now give me uh orders?
01:22:23.520 --> 01:22:30.880
I have a friend, female friend, whose driver stopped on Third Main Land Bridge because she was telling him that uh these stories are crazy.
01:22:30.960 --> 01:22:31.760
You always hear these things.
01:22:32.000 --> 01:22:33.359
Oh, she was telling him that you're driving.
01:22:33.680 --> 01:22:35.920
She didn't he didn't know that the woman knows how to drive.
01:22:36.079 --> 01:22:39.920
And he stopped her on Third Mainland Bridge and said you start to walk away.
01:22:40.000 --> 01:22:43.680
And the woman got into the car like a typical woman and drove.
01:22:43.840 --> 01:22:49.279
The guy reported the following day, hoping when it almost heard that story to come back.
01:22:49.600 --> 01:22:55.279
I heard that story, and the guy was like, I'm sorry, because you didn't know that way, fired is backside.
01:22:55.920 --> 01:22:58.319
So a lot of it has to do with accordance.
01:23:00.000 --> 01:23:04.880
You know, so it's a case of men, as like, who are you?
01:23:04.960 --> 01:23:11.439
You're a woman to to to to be talking to me, accept that she's qualified.
01:23:11.520 --> 01:23:14.000
Yes, and that is the big issue we have.
01:23:14.159 --> 01:23:28.399
We don't want to accept that a woman who to some people should be in the kitchen and just raising children has created herself and upskilled herself to the point where she's in a position to be able to give you advice.
01:23:28.640 --> 01:23:35.359
And as it's as it's happening in Nigeria, the one where they all, well, I lost in Peters is a lawyer now.
01:23:35.520 --> 01:23:42.880
You know, you know, everybody has their own, but the women have managed to get into this space and to in in I'm talking about the creative space now.
01:23:43.119 --> 01:23:49.920
They've now got there and they've turned it into one of their own, and they are making how long, how old is Ebony life?
01:23:50.319 --> 01:23:50.800
You understand?
01:23:50.960 --> 01:23:52.720
More came out of nowhere, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:23:53.279 --> 01:23:56.800
She's turned it into something you cannot ignore her.
01:23:57.119 --> 01:24:00.800
So Imagine losing your career path in life because of woman.
01:24:01.520 --> 01:24:02.159
I cannot walk with you.
01:24:03.279 --> 01:24:20.399
So you know, people have to judge people on merit and accept that if the person who is about to be your boss is a pygmy or a woman or black, white, red, or brown, accept it because they're there by merit.
01:24:20.640 --> 01:24:21.439
By merit.
01:24:21.680 --> 01:24:28.800
And the earlier we did we start to realize that, and accept it, because it's one thing to realize, it's another thing to accept.
01:24:28.960 --> 01:24:33.920
As long as you accept it and know that rather than throwing shade, accept that.
01:24:34.000 --> 01:24:37.520
Listen, I've got a lot to learn from these people, the better for us.
01:24:37.600 --> 01:24:40.399
I've learned it, I'm a better person for it, and I will continue to do so.
01:24:40.479 --> 01:24:41.279
That's my two cents.
01:24:43.039 --> 01:24:47.680
When I was in the bank, also, some of the best bosses I have to work with were women.
01:24:47.920 --> 01:24:48.319
There you go.
01:24:48.560 --> 01:24:50.960
Viola Sully, Kendi, Waleolon, Mojobi.
01:24:51.199 --> 01:24:54.079
And you could see over the years they rushed through the ranks.
01:24:54.159 --> 01:25:00.880
Even when I left the bank, from chief dealer to you know, treasurer, you know, they went all the way.
01:25:01.039 --> 01:25:05.760
So, and it was all on merits because every day you see them, you know, putting the work.
01:25:05.840 --> 01:25:07.920
And I'm like, special shout out to women.
01:25:08.000 --> 01:25:09.039
Now I'm a married man.
01:25:09.119 --> 01:25:20.720
I see some of the other things women have to deal with biologically, like hormones, yeah, child, children, husband, manage all those kids and still show up.
01:25:21.039 --> 01:25:26.239
So, like I like I always respected women, but I wasn't familiar with the game.
01:25:26.319 --> 01:25:27.600
But now I'm inside the game.
01:25:30.479 --> 01:25:30.720
Okay.
01:25:33.279 --> 01:25:34.000
Do you have anything you want to do?
01:25:34.399 --> 01:25:37.279
Final thoughts uh today's about okay.
01:25:37.359 --> 01:25:37.600
Go on.
01:25:37.680 --> 01:25:38.319
Okay, no, okay.
01:25:38.479 --> 01:25:39.199
Oh, you want to do the list?
01:25:39.359 --> 01:25:40.159
Yeah, I thought you had a question.
01:25:40.239 --> 01:25:40.880
Oh no, no, no, no.
01:25:40.960 --> 01:25:42.560
Okay, yeah, let's let's just get to this very quickly.
01:25:42.640 --> 01:25:45.199
It's not even a question, it's uh our live original moments.
01:25:45.279 --> 01:25:47.359
We had a comment that I saw on Twitter.
01:25:47.520 --> 01:25:49.199
Um it feels like this is stupid.
01:25:49.439 --> 01:25:50.000
I would react to it.
01:25:50.079 --> 01:25:50.880
It's not a question, it's a comment.
01:25:50.960 --> 01:25:52.319
So maybe you might react to this.
01:25:52.560 --> 01:26:01.600
So my parents still tell people I'm working on a project because they are ashamed I left my job for uh the creative arts.
01:26:04.239 --> 01:26:07.439
It's a lot of pressure being the black sheep in a family of professionals.
01:26:07.760 --> 01:26:09.600
It's just a tweet, a comment.
01:26:10.640 --> 01:26:11.279
I guess you can relate to it.
01:26:12.560 --> 01:26:13.359
I can relate to it too.
01:26:13.760 --> 01:26:17.840
My dad is my I can't count number one or two fans.
01:26:18.319 --> 01:26:19.439
Was he always that way with you?
01:26:19.600 --> 01:26:21.439
Um he knew what you were trying to do.
01:26:21.600 --> 01:26:22.319
No, no, no, no.
01:26:22.479 --> 01:26:26.319
Okay, it agrees on him uh from a person or someone like this now.
01:26:26.640 --> 01:26:30.239
I mean, agree on him, and then also it was also trust.
01:26:30.319 --> 01:26:50.239
I had to earn his trust because I mean you have to earn it, nobody's gonna give you your trying to live a secure life of banking to go and do what exactly, yeah, you know, what exactly actually now that I'm older, like I totally totally understand his worry and fear.
01:26:50.479 --> 01:26:56.560
Now you have kids, you're like, ah, and also knowing me personally, I'm sure I like it must have gone through a lot.
01:26:56.720 --> 01:26:59.359
Like this man wants to go and kill me.
01:26:59.760 --> 01:27:04.000
But now, you know, over time they've seen, like, okay, you're responsible with it.
01:27:04.079 --> 01:27:07.840
And now how did you have that conversation with them to say I'm not doing this back again?
01:27:08.079 --> 01:27:14.800
So at the at the time I had gained a bit of financial freedom because I'd worked for yes, I'd worked for a couple of years.
01:27:14.960 --> 01:27:18.560
You know, at the time I had taken solo trips, I'd moved out of the house.
01:27:18.720 --> 01:27:21.680
Yeah, told me, you know, if you move out, you're not coming back to this house, you know.
01:27:23.439 --> 01:27:25.439
And I was surviving, I was doing okay.
01:27:25.600 --> 01:27:31.279
So at the point where I said, Okay, I want to go for this show, I'd quit my job, I didn't tell him.
01:27:32.079 --> 01:27:36.880
So it was more like, okay, I'm going, and it's like, uh, okay, but you didn't quit your job, Shah.
01:27:36.960 --> 01:27:40.319
So, okay, what you just thought it was one of those things that useful exorberance.
01:27:40.399 --> 01:27:43.840
Like, I thought you are getting older, but you still seem to be this your ways.
01:27:43.920 --> 01:27:47.600
Go and do as you go back to the office, yeah, and then the rest is history.
01:27:47.760 --> 01:27:48.399
But interesting.
01:27:48.640 --> 01:27:53.279
Valid, you know, I feel like you have to earn that trust from anybody.
01:27:53.439 --> 01:27:54.239
Can I add something?
01:27:54.319 --> 01:27:59.760
Yeah, two weeks ago, I was with my mother, I was fine, people have been going to my mother.
01:28:00.159 --> 01:28:05.600
And saying, Ah, Farouk, your son, Ujudioba, Ijabu, these are the older generation, man.
01:28:05.680 --> 01:28:06.640
My mother called me.
01:28:06.720 --> 01:28:07.520
I went to see her.
01:28:07.600 --> 01:28:09.119
I see her most weekends.
01:28:10.319 --> 01:28:11.279
Tell me about this.
01:28:11.439 --> 01:28:13.039
What do you do at Ujudioba?
01:28:13.199 --> 01:28:14.399
My mother is an Ijabu manu.
01:28:14.640 --> 01:28:15.680
She's 86 years old.
01:28:15.840 --> 01:28:17.680
So even at that age, she's still worried about what you are.
01:28:17.920 --> 01:28:19.600
She's like, what is in it for you?
01:28:19.760 --> 01:28:21.359
Focus on your career.
01:28:21.600 --> 01:28:22.800
And she we had that.
01:28:26.319 --> 01:28:27.439
It is in the last two weeks.
01:28:29.119 --> 01:28:31.439
In 86 and 60, yes.
01:28:31.840 --> 01:28:33.279
It's in the last two weeks.
01:28:33.520 --> 01:28:39.920
So whether you're 19, you are seeing your mother's child.
01:28:40.079 --> 01:28:40.720
That's crazy.
01:28:41.039 --> 01:28:44.479
My mother was going through what focus on.
01:28:44.800 --> 01:28:46.239
How they're not going to fetch your walk.
01:28:46.319 --> 01:28:47.039
Fresh your walk.
01:28:47.119 --> 01:28:48.479
Hope you're not going to dress a mom.
01:28:48.720 --> 01:28:50.560
You know, it never ends.
01:28:51.279 --> 01:28:52.479
She is like, no.
01:28:53.199 --> 01:28:54.399
You have to forgot.
01:28:54.479 --> 01:28:55.760
I said, what is in it for you?
01:28:55.840 --> 01:28:57.600
I said, Mom, look at the followers.
01:28:58.000 --> 01:28:58.800
Blah blah blah.
01:28:58.880 --> 01:28:59.039
No.
01:29:01.600 --> 01:29:03.359
Focus on your that is funny.
01:29:05.359 --> 01:29:10.159
Mom growing up, it's like you have to be a doctor, banker, engineer, accountant, failure.
01:29:10.399 --> 01:29:10.800
What is that?
01:29:11.840 --> 01:29:12.960
Yeah, yeah, right your house.
01:29:13.520 --> 01:29:15.680
Madame, so it's never gonna end.
01:29:15.920 --> 01:29:18.159
It's it's it's a culture, it's a generational thing.
01:29:19.279 --> 01:29:25.600
By the time our kids come up, we're already officially.
01:29:29.359 --> 01:29:30.319
Do you follow Crack's TV?
01:29:30.479 --> 01:29:33.199
Do you follow because my brother also does social media stuff?
01:29:33.520 --> 01:29:34.479
So he's not marketing it.
01:29:35.119 --> 01:29:36.000
Do you follow Toby Baker?
01:29:38.560 --> 01:29:42.560
Is it like your son?
01:29:42.640 --> 01:29:45.039
Ah, Farouk, Uju Dioba 2026, it's coming up.
01:29:48.079 --> 01:29:49.600
But deep down though, I was like, eh.
01:29:49.760 --> 01:29:51.920
So show me two weeks ago.
01:29:52.079 --> 01:29:54.000
Show me this thing about Uju Dioba.
01:29:54.159 --> 01:29:55.119
What are you doing there?
01:29:55.359 --> 01:29:56.560
Then she saw me on a horse.
01:29:56.640 --> 01:29:57.439
I took the horse off.
01:29:57.520 --> 01:30:00.079
Like she's like, eh, it looks nice.
01:30:00.640 --> 01:30:02.800
But that's as much as you're gonna get.
01:30:02.880 --> 01:30:05.279
Yeah, they're not gonna say, Big up my child.
01:30:06.159 --> 01:30:07.359
Just focus on your job.
01:30:08.239 --> 01:30:09.760
You know, you know your MDC.
01:30:15.920 --> 01:30:17.680
Is there space on any horse for this year?
01:30:18.239 --> 01:30:22.000
Listen, man, it's it's it's we're gonna have a meeting at the end of May.
01:30:22.239 --> 01:30:26.079
I need to correct my horse picture so I manage you on the NGO.
01:30:27.840 --> 01:30:32.239
What the place is a horse picture and the horse looking like it's about to die.
01:30:32.880 --> 01:30:37.279
I need to look at you on everybody's complaining about my my profile picture on my WhatsApp.
01:30:37.439 --> 01:30:39.760
I got a horse up like this, two legs up in the air.
01:30:39.840 --> 01:30:40.880
I was about full like that.
01:30:41.520 --> 01:30:42.560
I tried, I tried, guys.
01:30:42.720 --> 01:30:43.039
I tried.
01:30:44.000 --> 01:30:44.479
You did good.
01:30:45.600 --> 01:30:46.239
We'll talk about it.
01:30:49.760 --> 01:30:50.800
Final thoughts from me.
01:30:50.960 --> 01:30:56.399
You know, this show is it's it's been great having a conversation with you guys about men and careers.
01:30:57.279 --> 01:31:12.479
I think if I was going to leave on one note, I would say that it's so hard for men not to tie our sense of identity to our jobs, our income, to that kind of materialistic value.
01:31:12.960 --> 01:31:18.239
But the danger with that is the day that the job disappears, the man will start to disappear too.
01:31:19.039 --> 01:31:24.720
And so your sense of identity has to have roots that are deeper than the job because the job will change.
01:31:24.800 --> 01:31:31.920
I mean, we're all you know proofs or or or evidence that constant evolution will it will evolve, it'll change over time.
01:31:32.399 --> 01:31:53.760
And yes, your career will provide opportunity, it will provide provision or a source of provision for you and your family, but ultimately the goal cannot be just to have a successful career, but the goal has to be to have a meaningful life, absolutely, and then it's deeper than what you do because that will change over time.
01:31:54.079 --> 01:31:56.239
It's it's who you are, who God created you to be.
01:31:56.479 --> 01:31:57.279
Can I just add to that?
01:31:57.359 --> 01:31:58.079
And that's where I would stop.
01:31:58.319 --> 01:31:58.960
Can I add to that?
01:31:59.039 --> 01:31:59.520
Yes, sir.
01:31:59.920 --> 01:32:04.720
You are what you are, what you're not, you will never be.
01:32:05.359 --> 01:32:06.560
Focus on what you are.
01:32:06.960 --> 01:32:09.279
Drop mic once again.
01:32:09.520 --> 01:32:10.319
Good night.
01:32:11.119 --> 01:32:12.560
Thank you for having us.
01:32:14.880 --> 01:32:20.239
Well, thank you guys for sharing this with us, for being as open and honest as we like it to be.
01:32:20.560 --> 01:32:21.199
Tobiji.
01:32:21.439 --> 01:32:21.920
My bros.
01:32:22.159 --> 01:32:27.279
It was nice, but really any final thoughts from always.
01:32:30.640 --> 01:32:36.399
This is a conversation that I relate to a lot because I was one of those people, like I said, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.
01:32:36.479 --> 01:32:51.199
Yeah, and I think it's one of the biggest conversations I have with young men today, whether it's people sending me DMs or people who see me, they're like, oh, I mean I'm a lawyer like you, but I only just studied it because I had to.
01:32:51.279 --> 01:32:53.840
Now I don't know what to do, or now I want to pivot.
01:32:54.000 --> 01:32:57.199
People have a lot of those questions and are trying to figure it out.
01:32:57.439 --> 01:33:01.680
And it's harder in a world today where, and it's not just Nigeria, globally, there's a lot of uncertainty.
01:33:02.640 --> 01:33:05.840
The job market isn't as good as it was 10, 15, 20 years ago.
01:33:06.720 --> 01:33:09.840
It's also harder for people to take risks because money not today.
01:33:09.920 --> 01:33:18.720
Yeah, so if someone is trying to help you start a business, you don't have that much uh leeway to you know play around.
01:33:18.960 --> 01:33:24.720
Yeah, so people are searching for answers to make the right decisions, and and I think this has helped in some way, you know.
01:33:25.039 --> 01:33:25.520
I hope so.
01:33:25.920 --> 01:33:26.479
I hope so.
01:33:27.119 --> 01:33:34.720
Um we're not we always say we're not here to give all the answers, but this we start a conversation and and help and help move things a little further.
01:33:34.800 --> 01:33:38.239
But even more importantly, we don't know everything, some people know more than us.
01:33:38.319 --> 01:33:40.399
So please share your thoughts on the comments.
01:33:40.560 --> 01:33:41.039
Yes, please.
01:33:41.279 --> 01:33:44.880
We always get very interesting comments, yes, we do uh on this, and you never know.
01:33:45.039 --> 01:33:46.800
The answer might be there share it nicely.
01:33:48.000 --> 01:33:49.760
Be gentle, be don't be like that.
01:33:50.079 --> 01:33:50.640
Don't be like that.
01:33:50.720 --> 01:33:51.359
Yeah, better than us.
01:33:51.600 --> 01:33:52.239
Thanks for joining us.
01:33:53.520 --> 01:33:53.920
Cheers, guys.
01:33:54.079 --> 01:33:54.560
Cheers, guys.
01:33:54.800 --> 01:33:56.159
Ah, remember me.
01:34:00.880 --> 01:34:03.039
I will take my level and I don't finish the water.
01:34:03.680 --> 01:34:04.720
That's bad luck.
01:34:04.880 --> 01:34:05.039
Eh?
01:34:05.279 --> 01:34:06.319
I'll take my cheers back.
01:34:10.159 --> 01:34:18.479
Thank you for this season of mentality with a booker is brought to you by Schweppes and the Glen Lee Vet.