Kristina:
00:00:00
But if I'm like going to contribute and clean, I then don't wanna be like critiqued on the cleaning. I didn't say anything. I know, but I could feel your eyes on the top of my head. And so then I just look at her.
Cora:
00:00:12
And she goes, stop it! And I was like, what? And I start laughing and then she laughed. And then I didn't, I didn't
Kristina:
00:00:19
cleen it. I didn't do anything. No, that was it. That was it. So that's, that's a great example of that. Yeah.
Cora:
00:00:24
I think a lot of those moments, I'm just like, it doesn't matter, you know?
Kristina:
00:00:33
Hey guys, this is Coach K and you're listening to the Making Changes Breaking Barriers podcast where we talk about you. This is about you, your mind, and your path. So we're gonna jump right into this, but like I said, on last week's episode, this is going to be the second part of having Cora on the podcast, basically. Okay? So if you didn't listen to the first part, go ahead and pause this episode and go back to last week's and listen to the first part, because it definitely does lead into what we're gonna be talking about today. Last week we talked all about how. Core and I met and we started the episode by really actually both of us talking about like what our life looked like before we met and how we both had this common theme of trying to kind of create a fresh start for ourself. And we did that before we ever even met each other. And it just happened to be that way, and I think that's a big reason why it actually ended up being so. Great. When we did meet and everything went like very well from there. Mm-hmm. We even read some messages from, uh, our first exchange with each other on Instagram. So yeah, if you're interested in that, go listen to that first episode, but, What we're gonna be talking about today is more kind of getting into the depth of our relationship and something that I feel like is, yeah, a big common theme within our relationship, and something that I think really holds our relationship together and helps us find happiness and joy with each other, on even kind of a mundane day, and I know I just said that wrong, but I just literally tried five times, right? Oh, that was right. Okay, well we're gonna roll with it anyways, but on even on normal day, just pause. I'm pausing, but this is actually gonna be part of the recording. I literally just tried to say that word like eight times and poor and I are dying. So if you. Think was like, what's wrong with Cora? She's laughing. No. Um, we're just trying to be on theme with our theme today. So anyways, back to what I was talking about, but. Laughter is such an important part of our relationship that on even a normal day, a day where it's a workday a day where we're just trying to run errands and get things done, we can find these little moments throughout the day where we make each other laugh or we smile at each other, or I give core a little butt grab or something like that, that, you know, just brings a smile to both of our faces, which I think. You know, just reminds us like, this is worth it and this is like the life that we want and this is the relationship that we want. So laughter's such a big part of our relationship and it's so important. And so before we actually get into a couple of the things specifically within our relationship that we tend to laugh a lot about, I did wanna talk about a few just benefits of laughter within a relationship, kind of other than what I just described. So first of all, one benefit of laughter is gonna be enhanced Bo emotional connection. All right, so a shared laughter creates a positive and enjoyable atmosphere fostering a deeper emotional connection between individuals. It helps partners or friends feel more comfortable, relaxed, and understood. Leading to increased intimacy and trust. Do you feel like that's true? I definitely feel like that's true. Yeah. So do I. So yeah, I mean, it's just kind of one of those things and there's other things, right? You could talk about, you know, your, um, sexual relationship with your partner. It could be like being vulnerable with each other. It could be even just like touching, right, touching each other. There's a lot of different things that can enhance that emotional connection, but like finding those moments to laugh together and to just feel that joy definitely is one of those things that really is gonna enhance that emotional connection. And I think we both feel that. Mm-hmm. Another thing that laughter's gonna do that's gonna benefit the relationship is a stress reliever, right? Like I was talking about, I mean, we'll have like a stressful day. A stressful Monday. You wanna talk about your stressful Mondays?
Cora:
00:04:25
No, I do get the worst Mondays of maybe anybody I've ever met though I'm, they're bad.
Kristina:
00:04:31
There's this meme, and maybe I'll have to find it and like put it in the video version of this, but it's from the movie Inside Out. I don't know if you guys have ever seen that movie, but there's a character on it. She's the blue character. What is her character? Sadness. Oh yeah, she's sadness and it, she's like dragging. Joy is dragging sadness. Oh yeah, joy. The character is dragging, sadness. The character along the floor and face down. So this is a meme and I think it says like, this is how my Monday is going. And I always. Think about that when Cora is so stressed on Mondays. It's not
Cora:
00:05:02
every Monday, but it's some Mondays, actually
Kristina:
00:05:04
less Mondays recently, I will say. Yeah, yeah. But even on days like that, back to my point, you know, laughter can really help just kind of break up that day. Right. Just. Again, remind us like I was saying before, like there's a reason why we're doing this. So laughter serves as a natural stress reliever, allowing couples to cope with daily challenges and tension. It helps diffuse conflicts, reduces the intensity of disagreements, and promotes a more positive and constructive approach to problem solving. So another benefit of laughter is increased resilience. I found this one interesting actually, as I was reading more about the benefits of laughter, But the ability to find humor and laugh together during difficult times can actually strengthen the resilience of a relationship. It provides a coping mechanism, right? Enabling couples to navigate through tough situations, setbacks and stressors in a greater ease and optimism. So I think sometimes like. Whether you're in an argument or something sad is going on in in your life or something along those lines, sometimes it almost feels like. We can't laugh, right? Like we have to stay serious. Mm-hmm. We can't break a smile or else, you know, other people might think like, aren't you sad? Or something like that. Right? But in the, in reality, finding humor sometimes in little moments within that bigger challenge, can really help show each other. Like, we're here for each other, right? We, this is gonna be a coping mechanism we're gonna use to get through this together. And it also can help just like, Create a little bit more of an optimistic situation, which can be really helpful in, in hard times as well. Couple more that I'll just go through really quickly. Laughter's gonna improve communication. Okay. It's gonna create enhanced enjoyment within shared activities, which I think makes a lot of sense. Laughter increases attraction and intimacy. Do you feel like that's true? Yeah, definitely. I like when you smile and when you belly laugh.
Cora:
00:07:03
Yeah. No, it's. It is attractive.
Kristina:
00:07:05
Yeah. Yeah. Um, last for you, not for me, like. You think you're attractive when you laugh? I know. I, I think you're attractive too. When I laugh, I wanna make that clear. I think you're, you're attractive when we feel the same. So great. Laughter also helps with creating healthier conflict resolution, which I think is totally true. And we're gonna talk about a little bit. Mm-hmm. You know, in more detail. And then yeah. Just overall better relationship satisfaction. So let's get into a little bit of like the specifics of CO and i's relationship and how we use. Laughter. Okay. First thing I'll say is, I do really feel like, and there's no science behind this, so someone can tell me if they disagree, but I really feel from my experience with myself and Cora, that there's two different kinds of laughter. So one kind of laughter is like that silly, goofy laugh. So kind of the laugh that Cora and I were just doing a few moments ago, like the laugh that just kind of like comes from deep in your stomach and you almost can't contain it and. Sometimes full body laugh. Full body laugh. Yeah. Like sometimes no, no sound even comes outta your mouth when you're laughing. Right? And it's normally coming just cuz something silly or goofy is happening, right? So that's the first kind of laughter. The second kind of laughter is like choosing, it's more of a choice, right? It's like you're choosing to laugh about something or chuckle about something instead of. The alternative, so you can kind of like picture what that would be, but instead of being annoyed at something or frustrated at something, or basically you have no other choice it feels like. So you're just gonna chuckle. You're just gonna laugh something off, right? Which that feels like a very different kind of laughter than the silly, goofy laugh. Yeah. So, Cora, my question for you is, what is something that I do that makes you silly, goofy, laugh.
Cora:
00:08:56
That's a good question. Um, there's a few things. Uh, I mean, anytime that you. Like mispronounce a word or you kinda like mess up your talking or anything like that. I think that's really funny. Um,
Kristina:
00:09:10
not, not that I should show, throw anyone under the bus for that, but I'm gonna throw my mom under the bus for that. I was just
Cora:
00:09:15
gonna say, I think it comes to back to the fact that like, Betty will switch words or, um, we'll kind of like say the wrong word or she'll miss a word or something and then Christina always blames her for it. And then when she, but she'll do it all the time like saying a word. Just incorrectly or whatever. But I
Kristina:
00:09:31
know all the time, not all the time, but like you would think, I couldn't produce a pod, like I shouldn't be able to even do the podcast thing. I guess that's why there's editing, right? I edit myself a lot,
Cora:
00:09:38
so, so that always makes me laugh. Um, and then, She's recently been trying some new things because she's, have you told them
Kristina:
00:09:46
about your track? No, I haven't actually. You can break the
Cora:
00:09:49
news. Okay. Christine's gonna do a half Iron Man in October, so she started training for that. And we have, I have laughed so hard in some of these training moments because it's just new, right? Like you put her on a basketball court, she looks like the most athletic person in the world. Put her in a pool. Thank you. She's like sinking, like it's so that was pretty funny to watch her swimming. Um, but you're very coachable and you take great feedback or you take feedback really well. So it's like, I'm not worried about laughing at you in those moments cuz even though you're being vulnerable, I know that you also have like a lot of confidence and you, you get it. You're laughing at yourself at the same time. Um, she tried to learn how to clip into a bike, a road bike the other day. And was very intimidated by it. Um, fell over then was like kind of frustrated, but in the span of 20 minutes, you know, she went from barely being able to like, get her foot into the clip to then like riding around the block. Right. But being a part of that was pretty comical cuz the panic and the anxiety was so high on like a. Like a pretty basic skill, but you have to learn it and then it's, then it's basic. So, um, but stuff like that I feel like is, is funny.
Kristina:
00:10:58
Yeah. The clip-in thing Core was getting a laugh out of, I'll say I wasn't getting a laugh out of because it was, there was like this mental block for me. I actually was scared. Like I was, I was scared. We were in our garage, we have a nice mat down in our garage cuz we have a garage gym. And I was like on that mat because I was just scared to fall and. Whatever, but it, it definitely was funny like looking back, but I will say, cuz Cora mentioned it, the pool situation. So my, if anyone from my college basketball team listens to this, you will remember if you were part of that like one swim workout that we did. I am not a good swimmer. Like I could survive, you know, for a while. I know how to swim, but I am not efficient in any way and my form is not great. So. We have been going to the pool and I've been like trying to get better and just like more comfortable in the pool, which has been great. But the other day our, our neighbor offered to go to the pool with us and she swam in college. She's done a, a half iron man herself. So she, she knows what she's doing and I actually didn't even realize she was gonna like, put us through with this whole workout, but that is, is exactly what she did. And she gave me all these pointers. Yeah. But at one point, the reason I'm telling you this is. She, um, had me hold onto a kickboard, and for any of you who don't know what that is, you basically, hold on. The kickboard with your hands, like straight out. So you, it's like a mini surfboard. It flows, helps you flow. Yeah. So you're not using your hands to swim and you're just kicking, right? So it's going to slow you down a little bit. But my kick is terrible. So basically I like push off the wall. Start kicking. This is a 25 yard pool, so not too long. I basically like get to the middle of the pool and Cora's doing this next to me and she's like way in front of me already. Like by the time we get to the half, halfway mark of the 25 yards and I get to the middle of the pool and like stall out, I'm kicking yet not going anywhere. Unsure of why this is happening and myself. Kelly and Cora, we'd all just start like bust up laughing, laughing because I'm just so terrible at this. Um, yeah. I'm just gonna give it my all and just try my best.
Cora:
00:13:10
Yeah. So I, I wanna say one more thing and then I'm gonna ask you the same question. But very early on, Christina told me she doesn't like to be laughed at, right? She's like, I want you to laugh with me, not at me. And so even in those biking moments, like I am very calm and I'm not, I'm laughing internally, but. Staying serious until it's to the point where then we can laugh at it because I, I don't wanna be laughed at either. Right. Especially not by your partner. Um, and so I just wanted to make that clear that I'm not like standing there watching you fall and laughing at you. Um, but, okay, so what do I do that makes you silly? Goofy belly
Kristina:
00:13:46
laugh. Yeah. So, This is a challenging question. You were kind of saying that earlier because I do feel like a lot of the times when we have that like silly, goofy laugh, it's just something totally unexpected. It's just a moment. Yeah. Yeah. KO and I very much value our evenings together. Any of our friends who are listening to this know what I'm talking about because we'll like bounce out of a situation at like 8:00 PM at the latest because we want to get home and have. Like an hour or two just on our own, right? Mm-hmm. And I think, I don't know if we really talk about that very often, but I very much value that that time. And sometimes to the outsider, it may seem like, oh, you're wanting to go to bed so early. But it's more about just like having that little bit of time together. And yeah, a lot of times we'll just be. Like laying in bed and I, I can't even describe it, but something will happen and we'll just both start like busting up laughing. But yeah. One specific thing that Cora does is, is, um, I'll actually backtrack when we first met, cuz we talked about that earlier, right? When we first met, we had this series of questions that we asked each other, right? Probably over the first couple weeks of us being together. So one of those questions, for example, was like, do you smoke? Right? That's an easy one. Do you wanna have kids do you, spend time, a lot of time with your family? Do you like to travel? Like all these things, right? Kind of the important things that we were old enough to know we wanted these things, in a partner or didn't want these things in a partner. One of the questions I asked her was, do you like to dance? Okay. I don't claim to be this like big dancer. I definitely don't claim to be a good dancer in any way, but I do know there are certain situations for myself, especially when I'm around like my larger family, where I. It's really fun to get out and dance, talk like a family wedding, for example. Right? We have a lot of fun as a group just getting out and dancing. So if someone really didn't like to dance and they're gonna choose to sit in the chair and not dance, you know, that would, I'm not saying that would be a complete deal breaker, but it would be an interesting situation. So anyways, I asked her if she likes to dance. And she said no. She said she didn't like to dance. And it was kind of one of those first things that happened where I was like, Hmm, that's interesting. First of all, from what I know about you, that doesn't fully fit your personality. Yeah. But okay. And then she proceeded. I feel like you have something you wanna say, but she proceeded and this is the thing that make like, uh, makes me laugh so much about Cora. I'll just be like sitting on the couch. And Cora will just be like in the kitchen or even just come right in front of me and just no music break out into a dance. Like it's like a routine that she's practiced in the bathroom. I've not practiced though five minutes before and she'll just start dancing. It will be a mixture of like six different dance moves, none of which I could do
Cora:
00:16:43
some, but you now know is not rehearsed cuz it's always the same sex. Some
Kristina:
00:16:47
booty shaking. And sometimes I shake my head, but sometimes it just really does make me belly, belly laugh. Yeah. So we've cleared up the whole, she doesn't like dancing. She actually does like dancing. Yeah. I don't like club dancing. She thought I was referring to like grinding. Like grinding in a club. I mean,
Cora:
00:17:04
I, we were in our late twenties. I was coming outta my club time. Like I think I just. It was the, I don't know. Anyways, it doesn't matter. Yeah, I do like to
Kristina:
00:17:11
dance. Yeah. So that's something that definitely makes me laugh, um, that core does. So that's the first kind of laughter, right? And whenever we can have that, it's great. The other thing I will say that I, I like to laugh about with Cora is like when we are having those stressful moments, and I can tell Cora has like this certain amount of tension. It's not that this tension is super high, but there's like a certain amount. I'll come and I'll just give her a big hug or I'll squeeze her butt or something like that and I'll basically just like butt talk, make her laugh instead of like feeling all that tension. I do feel like sometimes that helps you like. Release the tension.
Cora:
00:17:51
No, it does just kind of gets me outta that like tension tunnel vision, right? Mm-hmm. Where it's like so much anxiety filled of whatever I'm doing or trying to get things done and, um, to just get out of that zone for a quick second. You know, I actually, I can get really in those anxiety tunnels, but then I can get out of them pretty quickly. Yeah. And I think that you know that by now and. So you kind of know how to help me get out of those when I need 'em.
Kristina:
00:18:15
Yeah, which is great. So thank you. Sometimes I don't read the situation. Right. And I do that in cores like, no, I need a minute. Not very often. Rarely. Yeah,
Cora:
00:18:22
very rarely. Yeah, that's probably, I'm pretty deep in it. Hell
Kristina:
00:18:25
yeah. But yeah. Okay, so the second kind of laughter. So what is something that I do or there's probably lots of things that you choose to laugh at. Instead of being frustrated at or being really annoyed at. Well,
Cora:
00:18:40
this morning was actually a great example. We're eating breakfast. What happened this morning? Christina made us breakfast sandwiches. And so there's crumbs everywhere. Oh my God. And there's always crumbs everywhere. Like Christina's a very clean person, but I am like to the nth degree, so I'm a lot cleaner than her from that. Like, like crumb tidiness, counter wiping, stuff like that. So then she gets a PA wet paper towel and she's wiping off her area and I'm like, this is great. She's helping and she's just moving the crumbs everywhere. No, I wasn't. And I'm just watching it happen.
Kristina:
00:19:17
And then I see her and then I see her watching me and it's one of become one of my least favorite things that Cora does when she's like, watches me clean, because I know that she is like more of the cleaner. But if I'm like going to contribute and clean, I then don't wanna be like critiqued on the cleaning. I didn't say anything. I know, but I could feel your eyes on the top of my head. And so then I just look at her
Cora:
00:19:40
and she goes, stop it. And I was like, what? And I start laughing and then she laughed. And then I didn't, I didn't
Kristina:
00:19:47
cleen it. I didn't do anything. No, that was it. That was it. So that's, that's a great example of that. Yeah.
Cora:
00:19:52
I think a lot of those moments, I'm just like, it doesn't matter, you know? I. Like, yes, it's different than my standard, but if you're helping or you're doing something like, I can't come at you about that because then you're never gonna do it anymore. Or you know, it just, it doesn't become the partnership, you know, that we want it to be, so. Mm-hmm. Yeah, but that's, that one was just like so fresh in my mind, so, yeah,
Kristina:
00:20:16
that was a good one. I totally forgot about that already, but that was a good example. Okay. What about me? So, I think something that maybe annoyed me early on. Okay. But now I've chosen to laugh about is, so I'll be, I'll need something. Let's say it's our sunscreen and I'll go and look in whatever place I wa I feel like I had put it last and it's not there, and then I'll maybe like look in one more place and it's, Carol's gonna love to hear those. It's not there. And then, you know, eventually I'll have to ask Cora, because what I've learned is that Cora like loves to rearrange. And when I say rearrange, it doesn't necessarily mean she's like moving all the furniture around. It's just something had its place and now it has more optimal place, a new place, and there was no communication about it. So now I'm looking for it. And it's not there. And so it kind of now just is to the point where it makes me laugh and I chuckle about it and I just ask for, and now where it's at. And I just, I know that that's forever, ever. The rest of our relationship, the rest of the time we're alive, gonna be a thing that I, wow, my gosh. I'm just gonna have to be okay with. So yeah, I feel like
Cora:
00:21:30
I'm moving things less and less.
Kristina:
00:21:32
No, it's not an everyday thing. That is for sure. Okay. But it's just like that one time you're looking for like the pair of scissors and the pair of scissors are in. Yeah. I lost them for a while. Yeah. And then they're lost. Sometimes they're lost because they've been rearranged so many times.
Cora:
00:21:47
No. Or I use 'em and then I leave 'em somewhere. I didn't put 'em back, so, but yes. Yeah, I get it. Yeah.
Kristina:
00:21:53
The other, here's just another random one cuz that just made me think about it. I don't even know if Cory knows that. I'm gonna say this, but I didn't know what you were gonna say. Whenever we leave the house, We always, and we are not taking our dogs with us. We always give them a little piece of dog bacon, right? So we rip off a little piece of dog bacon and we go and they jump up on the couch. They're so excited and we say we're gonna be right back. And we give them the dog bacon and then we leave right away. So when I do that, I'll pull our dog bacon is like up on this higher shelf. I'll grab the dog bacon. I'll grab one out, I'll put it back out and, and I'll give the dog bacon. You just ruined the story.
Cora:
00:22:30
Okay. Go back.
Kristina:
00:22:31
I'll, I won't say it. No, it's okay. I'll, I'll, um, give the dog bacon and then we'll leave. Right? But when Cora does it, she pulls the dog back down, grabs the dog bacon, goes and gives the dog. Bacon and then leaves, and the dog bacon thing just ends up on the counter instead of back onto the shelf. And so yeah, instead of letting that annoy me, I just chuckle at it now and I grab it and I put it back.
Cora:
00:22:54
Do I put it back sometimes Now I think I'm
Kristina:
00:22:56
doing better. I think you are. I haven't noticed it as much recently actually. Yeah.
Cora:
00:23:00
And I think it's annoying to you because if there's food on the counter, the dogs can like kind of see it and they will whine at it. Yeah. So I think you just probably feel bad. You don't want them to have to be watching or looking at that the whole time that we're gone. Yeah.
Kristina:
00:23:13
Cannon mostly. So anyways, we laugh a lot together. It's always different kinds of laughs. Mm-hmm But, and by the way, I just wanna say cuz. You know, I try and be mostly positive on this podcast, but it's not always laughing. Right. And Cora and I do have arguments. We've ha and I will say, if I can be totally transparent, we can always edit this out if you don't want me to say this, but. You know, we have more arguments now than we had in probably our first year of being together. Like yeah, we have more responsibilities and there's a little bit more baggage now, and, and
Cora:
00:23:48
I don't even know if I'd say arguments. I'd say we have a lot more serious or tougher conversations. Mm-hmm. Right. And rarely do we disagree, but sometimes we need to like, talk through things or, you know, we have to be honest with each other about, you know, how we're treating each other or like if somebody's a little bit flared up or like things like that. And so, Yeah, but I don't think they're all like arguments, you know? But Yeah, I get what you're saying.
Kristina:
00:24:13
Yeah. And they always get resolved and whatever, but yeah. Um, so I'm just bringing that up because I always like to give that ca caveat that it's not just all like sunshine and rainbows, right? We're not just always laughing, but we do really try and cultivate a playful relationship. Like one more example I'll give before we wrap this up is, We were actually at my parents' house one time, not long ago, and co and I were, I think we were heading back into the bedroom we were staying in to like change for whatever the next thing we were doing or something along those lines. And we just were being silly. Like, I don't even remember what we were doing, but we, were being silly and laughing and chuckling and saying funny things to each other. And my mom, you know, I remember yelling like, You guys sound like little kids in there like playing, and that always like sticks in my head and I kind of love that. Like, I love that like playful um, life and that playful mindset and just like never just remembering to not take things so seriously. Cuz I know, especially for me, when I start taking everything so seriously, I get anxiety and I get stressed and it's just, it's not fun. We snap at each other, you know? But when we remember, hey, everything's gonna be okay. You know, we love each other, we love our little cute dogs. We have a great life and let's have some fun, you know, in the moments that we can, I think everything feels a lot better. Yeah, and a lot more doable. And
Cora:
00:25:38
I think that we do a really good job of tabling things. I. So, like, for example, if we need to talk about finances, we're just gonna table it until we have time to like look at them. Right. And then we're gonna go through it together. We're gonna make sure we have time on our calendar to like do everything that we need to do and we're gonna get it done. If we're having a tough conversation or one person's like having not a great day or whatever, we like get through it. Mm-hmm. You know, and then, and then we move on. We don't really hold onto things or drag things out because. That does then create this kind of like snowball in a negative way. So I feel like we do a good job of like kind of getting through things, getting it done when it's a less positive day or interaction or whatever it might be. And then we get back to having fun. You know, we can both kind of move on and get through it and then get back to that like playful energy that we love.
Kristina:
00:26:25
Yeah. And one more thing I know that we wanted to talk about too, which I do think is really important and part of this. Playful, um, environment that we're creating is actually the people that we choose to be around a hundred percent. And I know you really wanted to talk about that.
Cora:
00:26:39
Yeah. Well, I just think that we've built this into our relationship and so as we've, especially since we've now moved to, to bend and we've built a community here, that's our community, you know, this is our first time as a couple moving to a new place and building relationships with other couples or. You know, like making friends together, we have absolutely been drawn to and built a community around people who are very similar. They have a lot of fun in their relationships. So we can have fun as couples, we can have fun as individuals and it's very similar relationships, conversations where we can get into nitty gritty, tough stuff. But we can also have like a really great time and be deep belly laughing with these friends. And that's all of our friends here in Bend. And I think that that really helps us continue to embody that lifestyle because we're in it, even when we're on our own. We're in it when we're with our friends and we have a ton of fun. So, um,
Kristina:
00:27:33
yeah. Yeah, that, that's a really big piece of it actually. And I'm glad that we remember to, to bring this up. Yeah. Because, you know, like I've talked about kind of that like routine day where we're working or whatever, and, and sometimes core and I are able to kind of just. Relax and, and laugh together, just the two of us. But sometimes we're like, we need outta the house, right? And so like to have that friend group or to have other people we can bring in who we know are just gonna bring more positivity. And we know we're gonna make us chuckle and we're gonna have a, a fun time with, and it's not gonna be filled with drama. It's not gonna be filled with gossiping, right? It's not gonna be filled with all these other negative things that sometimes friendships are. Um, I, you know, I think that's great. And we also like to do like really active things with our friends too, right. Which helps, again, cultivate that playful mindset. So yeah, friends are a huge piece of. Contributing to that laughter dynamic within our relationship that we have. One last thing that I want to ask you, the seventh
Cora:
00:28:32
last thing.
Kristina:
00:28:34
That's true. But, um, I've been thinking about it and I think it's kind of a fun question, is, is there a type of humor that I have brought into your life that you didn't really have before? And I'm thinking like, if it helps you more like on the TV show or like movie or. Or anything like that that you can think of? I can go first if you can't think
Cora:
00:28:56
of anything, but I can't think of anything. But I do think that you have a different sense. You definitely have a different sense of humor than me. Mm-hmm. And so I think that just seeing things a little bit differently, I like from your perspective has been, um, I don't know, maybe just educational because it's not really how I have. Approach tumor in the past or how, what? Like necessarily what I think is super funny, but I enjoy things now that you think are funny. Hmm. Like I
Kristina:
00:29:25
think that they're funny. Yeah. I guess that's what I asked. But you, you don't, can't think of like a
Cora:
00:29:28
specific example? No, I can't pinpoint anything. Okay. It's kind of like the moments thing, you know, like if it happened I could say, oh, this is what I'm talking about. But I cannot think of anything right now.
Kristina:
00:29:37
Yeah. All I can think about is something that you think is funny that I don't think is funny. Oh, which is the, yeah. Okay, cool. That's the type of humor that I can just like not get my head around. Yeah. To the point where Cora will have it on and I, it actually annoys the out of me and so I'd tell her to turn, I like have to have it off. We have to change the
Cora:
00:29:55
channel. If Christina's even in the living room kitchen area, it needs to be turned off. But if she's in a different room, I even
Kristina:
00:30:02
though get away it, I can still kind of hear it, but I know you
Cora:
00:30:04
can, but you don't say anything until you come into the actual room and then you're like, we need to change it.
Kristina:
00:30:09
So that's something we don't laugh about together, but that's okay. We can each have our own things, show sometimes. Love that. The next podcast we do together should be about like, Are things that we do separately. Hmm. Okay.
Cora:
00:30:21
I'll work on my list. It's probably three things. Just kidding.
Kristina:
00:30:25
All right guys. Well that is what I, we are gonna leave you with today. Um, go out and do some laughing. Yeah. Go laugh with someone, whether it is your romantic partner or friend or someone just. Try and get a good laugh in today. It feels good and it's just a really nice way to, bring some positivity into your life. And stay tuned to next week. Unfortunately Cora won't be here with us anymore, but we'll be back to us on the podcast. Oh yeah. She won't be with us anymore on the podcast, she'll still be here. But, um, it'll be back to a solo episode and I have some really fun, exciting things to share with you. So like I always do. I'm gonna leave you with this. Changing your path will not be easy. It will be challenging. I will say that over and over again, but it will be worth it. Do a self-check today. Are you on your path up your mountain? And if not, what path are you on?
00:00:00
But if I'm like going to contribute and clean, I then don't wanna be like critiqued on the cleaning. I didn't say anything. I know, but I could feel your eyes on the top of my head. And so then I just look at her.
Cora:
00:00:12
And she goes, stop it! And I was like, what? And I start laughing and then she laughed. And then I didn't, I didn't
Kristina:
00:00:19
cleen it. I didn't do anything. No, that was it. That was it. So that's, that's a great example of that. Yeah.
Cora:
00:00:24
I think a lot of those moments, I'm just like, it doesn't matter, you know?
Kristina:
00:00:33
Hey guys, this is Coach K and you're listening to the Making Changes Breaking Barriers podcast where we talk about you. This is about you, your mind, and your path. So we're gonna jump right into this, but like I said, on last week's episode, this is going to be the second part of having Cora on the podcast, basically. Okay? So if you didn't listen to the first part, go ahead and pause this episode and go back to last week's and listen to the first part, because it definitely does lead into what we're gonna be talking about today. Last week we talked all about how. Core and I met and we started the episode by really actually both of us talking about like what our life looked like before we met and how we both had this common theme of trying to kind of create a fresh start for ourself. And we did that before we ever even met each other. And it just happened to be that way, and I think that's a big reason why it actually ended up being so. Great. When we did meet and everything went like very well from there. Mm-hmm. We even read some messages from, uh, our first exchange with each other on Instagram. So yeah, if you're interested in that, go listen to that first episode, but, What we're gonna be talking about today is more kind of getting into the depth of our relationship and something that I feel like is, yeah, a big common theme within our relationship, and something that I think really holds our relationship together and helps us find happiness and joy with each other, on even kind of a mundane day, and I know I just said that wrong, but I just literally tried five times, right? Oh, that was right. Okay, well we're gonna roll with it anyways, but on even on normal day, just pause. I'm pausing, but this is actually gonna be part of the recording. I literally just tried to say that word like eight times and poor and I are dying. So if you. Think was like, what's wrong with Cora? She's laughing. No. Um, we're just trying to be on theme with our theme today. So anyways, back to what I was talking about, but. Laughter is such an important part of our relationship that on even a normal day, a day where it's a workday a day where we're just trying to run errands and get things done, we can find these little moments throughout the day where we make each other laugh or we smile at each other, or I give core a little butt grab or something like that, that, you know, just brings a smile to both of our faces, which I think. You know, just reminds us like, this is worth it and this is like the life that we want and this is the relationship that we want. So laughter's such a big part of our relationship and it's so important. And so before we actually get into a couple of the things specifically within our relationship that we tend to laugh a lot about, I did wanna talk about a few just benefits of laughter within a relationship, kind of other than what I just described. So first of all, one benefit of laughter is gonna be enhanced Bo emotional connection. All right, so a shared laughter creates a positive and enjoyable atmosphere fostering a deeper emotional connection between individuals. It helps partners or friends feel more comfortable, relaxed, and understood. Leading to increased intimacy and trust. Do you feel like that's true? I definitely feel like that's true. Yeah. So do I. So yeah, I mean, it's just kind of one of those things and there's other things, right? You could talk about, you know, your, um, sexual relationship with your partner. It could be like being vulnerable with each other. It could be even just like touching, right, touching each other. There's a lot of different things that can enhance that emotional connection, but like finding those moments to laugh together and to just feel that joy definitely is one of those things that really is gonna enhance that emotional connection. And I think we both feel that. Mm-hmm. Another thing that laughter's gonna do that's gonna benefit the relationship is a stress reliever, right? Like I was talking about, I mean, we'll have like a stressful day. A stressful Monday. You wanna talk about your stressful Mondays?
Cora:
00:04:25
No, I do get the worst Mondays of maybe anybody I've ever met though I'm, they're bad.
Kristina:
00:04:31
There's this meme, and maybe I'll have to find it and like put it in the video version of this, but it's from the movie Inside Out. I don't know if you guys have ever seen that movie, but there's a character on it. She's the blue character. What is her character? Sadness. Oh yeah, she's sadness and it, she's like dragging. Joy is dragging sadness. Oh yeah, joy. The character is dragging, sadness. The character along the floor and face down. So this is a meme and I think it says like, this is how my Monday is going. And I always. Think about that when Cora is so stressed on Mondays. It's not
Cora:
00:05:02
every Monday, but it's some Mondays, actually
Kristina:
00:05:04
less Mondays recently, I will say. Yeah, yeah. But even on days like that, back to my point, you know, laughter can really help just kind of break up that day. Right. Just. Again, remind us like I was saying before, like there's a reason why we're doing this. So laughter serves as a natural stress reliever, allowing couples to cope with daily challenges and tension. It helps diffuse conflicts, reduces the intensity of disagreements, and promotes a more positive and constructive approach to problem solving. So another benefit of laughter is increased resilience. I found this one interesting actually, as I was reading more about the benefits of laughter, But the ability to find humor and laugh together during difficult times can actually strengthen the resilience of a relationship. It provides a coping mechanism, right? Enabling couples to navigate through tough situations, setbacks and stressors in a greater ease and optimism. So I think sometimes like. Whether you're in an argument or something sad is going on in in your life or something along those lines, sometimes it almost feels like. We can't laugh, right? Like we have to stay serious. Mm-hmm. We can't break a smile or else, you know, other people might think like, aren't you sad? Or something like that. Right? But in the, in reality, finding humor sometimes in little moments within that bigger challenge, can really help show each other. Like, we're here for each other, right? We, this is gonna be a coping mechanism we're gonna use to get through this together. And it also can help just like, Create a little bit more of an optimistic situation, which can be really helpful in, in hard times as well. Couple more that I'll just go through really quickly. Laughter's gonna improve communication. Okay. It's gonna create enhanced enjoyment within shared activities, which I think makes a lot of sense. Laughter increases attraction and intimacy. Do you feel like that's true? Yeah, definitely. I like when you smile and when you belly laugh.
Cora:
00:07:03
Yeah. No, it's. It is attractive.
Kristina:
00:07:05
Yeah. Yeah. Um, last for you, not for me, like. You think you're attractive when you laugh? I know. I, I think you're attractive too. When I laugh, I wanna make that clear. I think you're, you're attractive when we feel the same. So great. Laughter also helps with creating healthier conflict resolution, which I think is totally true. And we're gonna talk about a little bit. Mm-hmm. You know, in more detail. And then yeah. Just overall better relationship satisfaction. So let's get into a little bit of like the specifics of CO and i's relationship and how we use. Laughter. Okay. First thing I'll say is, I do really feel like, and there's no science behind this, so someone can tell me if they disagree, but I really feel from my experience with myself and Cora, that there's two different kinds of laughter. So one kind of laughter is like that silly, goofy laugh. So kind of the laugh that Cora and I were just doing a few moments ago, like the laugh that just kind of like comes from deep in your stomach and you almost can't contain it and. Sometimes full body laugh. Full body laugh. Yeah. Like sometimes no, no sound even comes outta your mouth when you're laughing. Right? And it's normally coming just cuz something silly or goofy is happening, right? So that's the first kind of laughter. The second kind of laughter is like choosing, it's more of a choice, right? It's like you're choosing to laugh about something or chuckle about something instead of. The alternative, so you can kind of like picture what that would be, but instead of being annoyed at something or frustrated at something, or basically you have no other choice it feels like. So you're just gonna chuckle. You're just gonna laugh something off, right? Which that feels like a very different kind of laughter than the silly, goofy laugh. Yeah. So, Cora, my question for you is, what is something that I do that makes you silly, goofy, laugh.
Cora:
00:08:56
That's a good question. Um, there's a few things. Uh, I mean, anytime that you. Like mispronounce a word or you kinda like mess up your talking or anything like that. I think that's really funny. Um,
Kristina:
00:09:10
not, not that I should show, throw anyone under the bus for that, but I'm gonna throw my mom under the bus for that. I was just
Cora:
00:09:15
gonna say, I think it comes to back to the fact that like, Betty will switch words or, um, we'll kind of like say the wrong word or she'll miss a word or something and then Christina always blames her for it. And then when she, but she'll do it all the time like saying a word. Just incorrectly or whatever. But I
Kristina:
00:09:31
know all the time, not all the time, but like you would think, I couldn't produce a pod, like I shouldn't be able to even do the podcast thing. I guess that's why there's editing, right? I edit myself a lot,
Cora:
00:09:38
so, so that always makes me laugh. Um, and then, She's recently been trying some new things because she's, have you told them
Kristina:
00:09:46
about your track? No, I haven't actually. You can break the
Cora:
00:09:49
news. Okay. Christine's gonna do a half Iron Man in October, so she started training for that. And we have, I have laughed so hard in some of these training moments because it's just new, right? Like you put her on a basketball court, she looks like the most athletic person in the world. Put her in a pool. Thank you. She's like sinking, like it's so that was pretty funny to watch her swimming. Um, but you're very coachable and you take great feedback or you take feedback really well. So it's like, I'm not worried about laughing at you in those moments cuz even though you're being vulnerable, I know that you also have like a lot of confidence and you, you get it. You're laughing at yourself at the same time. Um, she tried to learn how to clip into a bike, a road bike the other day. And was very intimidated by it. Um, fell over then was like kind of frustrated, but in the span of 20 minutes, you know, she went from barely being able to like, get her foot into the clip to then like riding around the block. Right. But being a part of that was pretty comical cuz the panic and the anxiety was so high on like a. Like a pretty basic skill, but you have to learn it and then it's, then it's basic. So, um, but stuff like that I feel like is, is funny.
Kristina:
00:10:58
Yeah. The clip-in thing Core was getting a laugh out of, I'll say I wasn't getting a laugh out of because it was, there was like this mental block for me. I actually was scared. Like I was, I was scared. We were in our garage, we have a nice mat down in our garage cuz we have a garage gym. And I was like on that mat because I was just scared to fall and. Whatever, but it, it definitely was funny like looking back, but I will say, cuz Cora mentioned it, the pool situation. So my, if anyone from my college basketball team listens to this, you will remember if you were part of that like one swim workout that we did. I am not a good swimmer. Like I could survive, you know, for a while. I know how to swim, but I am not efficient in any way and my form is not great. So. We have been going to the pool and I've been like trying to get better and just like more comfortable in the pool, which has been great. But the other day our, our neighbor offered to go to the pool with us and she swam in college. She's done a, a half iron man herself. So she, she knows what she's doing and I actually didn't even realize she was gonna like, put us through with this whole workout, but that is, is exactly what she did. And she gave me all these pointers. Yeah. But at one point, the reason I'm telling you this is. She, um, had me hold onto a kickboard, and for any of you who don't know what that is, you basically, hold on. The kickboard with your hands, like straight out. So you, it's like a mini surfboard. It flows, helps you flow. Yeah. So you're not using your hands to swim and you're just kicking, right? So it's going to slow you down a little bit. But my kick is terrible. So basically I like push off the wall. Start kicking. This is a 25 yard pool, so not too long. I basically like get to the middle of the pool and Cora's doing this next to me and she's like way in front of me already. Like by the time we get to the half, halfway mark of the 25 yards and I get to the middle of the pool and like stall out, I'm kicking yet not going anywhere. Unsure of why this is happening and myself. Kelly and Cora, we'd all just start like bust up laughing, laughing because I'm just so terrible at this. Um, yeah. I'm just gonna give it my all and just try my best.
Cora:
00:13:10
Yeah. So I, I wanna say one more thing and then I'm gonna ask you the same question. But very early on, Christina told me she doesn't like to be laughed at, right? She's like, I want you to laugh with me, not at me. And so even in those biking moments, like I am very calm and I'm not, I'm laughing internally, but. Staying serious until it's to the point where then we can laugh at it because I, I don't wanna be laughed at either. Right. Especially not by your partner. Um, and so I just wanted to make that clear that I'm not like standing there watching you fall and laughing at you. Um, but, okay, so what do I do that makes you silly? Goofy belly
Kristina:
00:13:46
laugh. Yeah. So, This is a challenging question. You were kind of saying that earlier because I do feel like a lot of the times when we have that like silly, goofy laugh, it's just something totally unexpected. It's just a moment. Yeah. Yeah. KO and I very much value our evenings together. Any of our friends who are listening to this know what I'm talking about because we'll like bounce out of a situation at like 8:00 PM at the latest because we want to get home and have. Like an hour or two just on our own, right? Mm-hmm. And I think, I don't know if we really talk about that very often, but I very much value that that time. And sometimes to the outsider, it may seem like, oh, you're wanting to go to bed so early. But it's more about just like having that little bit of time together. And yeah, a lot of times we'll just be. Like laying in bed and I, I can't even describe it, but something will happen and we'll just both start like busting up laughing. But yeah. One specific thing that Cora does is, is, um, I'll actually backtrack when we first met, cuz we talked about that earlier, right? When we first met, we had this series of questions that we asked each other, right? Probably over the first couple weeks of us being together. So one of those questions, for example, was like, do you smoke? Right? That's an easy one. Do you wanna have kids do you, spend time, a lot of time with your family? Do you like to travel? Like all these things, right? Kind of the important things that we were old enough to know we wanted these things, in a partner or didn't want these things in a partner. One of the questions I asked her was, do you like to dance? Okay. I don't claim to be this like big dancer. I definitely don't claim to be a good dancer in any way, but I do know there are certain situations for myself, especially when I'm around like my larger family, where I. It's really fun to get out and dance, talk like a family wedding, for example. Right? We have a lot of fun as a group just getting out and dancing. So if someone really didn't like to dance and they're gonna choose to sit in the chair and not dance, you know, that would, I'm not saying that would be a complete deal breaker, but it would be an interesting situation. So anyways, I asked her if she likes to dance. And she said no. She said she didn't like to dance. And it was kind of one of those first things that happened where I was like, Hmm, that's interesting. First of all, from what I know about you, that doesn't fully fit your personality. Yeah. But okay. And then she proceeded. I feel like you have something you wanna say, but she proceeded and this is the thing that make like, uh, makes me laugh so much about Cora. I'll just be like sitting on the couch. And Cora will just be like in the kitchen or even just come right in front of me and just no music break out into a dance. Like it's like a routine that she's practiced in the bathroom. I've not practiced though five minutes before and she'll just start dancing. It will be a mixture of like six different dance moves, none of which I could do
Cora:
00:16:43
some, but you now know is not rehearsed cuz it's always the same sex. Some
Kristina:
00:16:47
booty shaking. And sometimes I shake my head, but sometimes it just really does make me belly, belly laugh. Yeah. So we've cleared up the whole, she doesn't like dancing. She actually does like dancing. Yeah. I don't like club dancing. She thought I was referring to like grinding. Like grinding in a club. I mean,
Cora:
00:17:04
I, we were in our late twenties. I was coming outta my club time. Like I think I just. It was the, I don't know. Anyways, it doesn't matter. Yeah, I do like to
Kristina:
00:17:11
dance. Yeah. So that's something that definitely makes me laugh, um, that core does. So that's the first kind of laughter, right? And whenever we can have that, it's great. The other thing I will say that I, I like to laugh about with Cora is like when we are having those stressful moments, and I can tell Cora has like this certain amount of tension. It's not that this tension is super high, but there's like a certain amount. I'll come and I'll just give her a big hug or I'll squeeze her butt or something like that and I'll basically just like butt talk, make her laugh instead of like feeling all that tension. I do feel like sometimes that helps you like. Release the tension.
Cora:
00:17:51
No, it does just kind of gets me outta that like tension tunnel vision, right? Mm-hmm. Where it's like so much anxiety filled of whatever I'm doing or trying to get things done and, um, to just get out of that zone for a quick second. You know, I actually, I can get really in those anxiety tunnels, but then I can get out of them pretty quickly. Yeah. And I think that you know that by now and. So you kind of know how to help me get out of those when I need 'em.
Kristina:
00:18:15
Yeah, which is great. So thank you. Sometimes I don't read the situation. Right. And I do that in cores like, no, I need a minute. Not very often. Rarely. Yeah,
Cora:
00:18:22
very rarely. Yeah, that's probably, I'm pretty deep in it. Hell
Kristina:
00:18:25
yeah. But yeah. Okay, so the second kind of laughter. So what is something that I do or there's probably lots of things that you choose to laugh at. Instead of being frustrated at or being really annoyed at. Well,
Cora:
00:18:40
this morning was actually a great example. We're eating breakfast. What happened this morning? Christina made us breakfast sandwiches. And so there's crumbs everywhere. Oh my God. And there's always crumbs everywhere. Like Christina's a very clean person, but I am like to the nth degree, so I'm a lot cleaner than her from that. Like, like crumb tidiness, counter wiping, stuff like that. So then she gets a PA wet paper towel and she's wiping off her area and I'm like, this is great. She's helping and she's just moving the crumbs everywhere. No, I wasn't. And I'm just watching it happen.
Kristina:
00:19:17
And then I see her and then I see her watching me and it's one of become one of my least favorite things that Cora does when she's like, watches me clean, because I know that she is like more of the cleaner. But if I'm like going to contribute and clean, I then don't wanna be like critiqued on the cleaning. I didn't say anything. I know, but I could feel your eyes on the top of my head. And so then I just look at her
Cora:
00:19:40
and she goes, stop it. And I was like, what? And I start laughing and then she laughed. And then I didn't, I didn't
Kristina:
00:19:47
cleen it. I didn't do anything. No, that was it. That was it. So that's, that's a great example of that. Yeah.
Cora:
00:19:52
I think a lot of those moments, I'm just like, it doesn't matter, you know? I. Like, yes, it's different than my standard, but if you're helping or you're doing something like, I can't come at you about that because then you're never gonna do it anymore. Or you know, it just, it doesn't become the partnership, you know, that we want it to be, so. Mm-hmm. Yeah, but that's, that one was just like so fresh in my mind, so, yeah,
Kristina:
00:20:16
that was a good one. I totally forgot about that already, but that was a good example. Okay. What about me? So, I think something that maybe annoyed me early on. Okay. But now I've chosen to laugh about is, so I'll be, I'll need something. Let's say it's our sunscreen and I'll go and look in whatever place I wa I feel like I had put it last and it's not there, and then I'll maybe like look in one more place and it's, Carol's gonna love to hear those. It's not there. And then, you know, eventually I'll have to ask Cora, because what I've learned is that Cora like loves to rearrange. And when I say rearrange, it doesn't necessarily mean she's like moving all the furniture around. It's just something had its place and now it has more optimal place, a new place, and there was no communication about it. So now I'm looking for it. And it's not there. And so it kind of now just is to the point where it makes me laugh and I chuckle about it and I just ask for, and now where it's at. And I just, I know that that's forever, ever. The rest of our relationship, the rest of the time we're alive, gonna be a thing that I, wow, my gosh. I'm just gonna have to be okay with. So yeah, I feel like
Cora:
00:21:30
I'm moving things less and less.
Kristina:
00:21:32
No, it's not an everyday thing. That is for sure. Okay. But it's just like that one time you're looking for like the pair of scissors and the pair of scissors are in. Yeah. I lost them for a while. Yeah. And then they're lost. Sometimes they're lost because they've been rearranged so many times.
Cora:
00:21:47
No. Or I use 'em and then I leave 'em somewhere. I didn't put 'em back, so, but yes. Yeah, I get it. Yeah.
Kristina:
00:21:53
The other, here's just another random one cuz that just made me think about it. I don't even know if Cory knows that. I'm gonna say this, but I didn't know what you were gonna say. Whenever we leave the house, We always, and we are not taking our dogs with us. We always give them a little piece of dog bacon, right? So we rip off a little piece of dog bacon and we go and they jump up on the couch. They're so excited and we say we're gonna be right back. And we give them the dog bacon and then we leave right away. So when I do that, I'll pull our dog bacon is like up on this higher shelf. I'll grab the dog bacon. I'll grab one out, I'll put it back out and, and I'll give the dog bacon. You just ruined the story.
Cora:
00:22:30
Okay. Go back.
Kristina:
00:22:31
I'll, I won't say it. No, it's okay. I'll, I'll, um, give the dog bacon and then we'll leave. Right? But when Cora does it, she pulls the dog back down, grabs the dog bacon, goes and gives the dog. Bacon and then leaves, and the dog bacon thing just ends up on the counter instead of back onto the shelf. And so yeah, instead of letting that annoy me, I just chuckle at it now and I grab it and I put it back.
Cora:
00:22:54
Do I put it back sometimes Now I think I'm
Kristina:
00:22:56
doing better. I think you are. I haven't noticed it as much recently actually. Yeah.
Cora:
00:23:00
And I think it's annoying to you because if there's food on the counter, the dogs can like kind of see it and they will whine at it. Yeah. So I think you just probably feel bad. You don't want them to have to be watching or looking at that the whole time that we're gone. Yeah.
Kristina:
00:23:13
Cannon mostly. So anyways, we laugh a lot together. It's always different kinds of laughs. Mm-hmm But, and by the way, I just wanna say cuz. You know, I try and be mostly positive on this podcast, but it's not always laughing. Right. And Cora and I do have arguments. We've ha and I will say, if I can be totally transparent, we can always edit this out if you don't want me to say this, but. You know, we have more arguments now than we had in probably our first year of being together. Like yeah, we have more responsibilities and there's a little bit more baggage now, and, and
Cora:
00:23:48
I don't even know if I'd say arguments. I'd say we have a lot more serious or tougher conversations. Mm-hmm. Right. And rarely do we disagree, but sometimes we need to like, talk through things or, you know, we have to be honest with each other about, you know, how we're treating each other or like if somebody's a little bit flared up or like things like that. And so, Yeah, but I don't think they're all like arguments, you know? But Yeah, I get what you're saying.
Kristina:
00:24:13
Yeah. And they always get resolved and whatever, but yeah. Um, so I'm just bringing that up because I always like to give that ca caveat that it's not just all like sunshine and rainbows, right? We're not just always laughing, but we do really try and cultivate a playful relationship. Like one more example I'll give before we wrap this up is, We were actually at my parents' house one time, not long ago, and co and I were, I think we were heading back into the bedroom we were staying in to like change for whatever the next thing we were doing or something along those lines. And we just were being silly. Like, I don't even remember what we were doing, but we, were being silly and laughing and chuckling and saying funny things to each other. And my mom, you know, I remember yelling like, You guys sound like little kids in there like playing, and that always like sticks in my head and I kind of love that. Like, I love that like playful um, life and that playful mindset and just like never just remembering to not take things so seriously. Cuz I know, especially for me, when I start taking everything so seriously, I get anxiety and I get stressed and it's just, it's not fun. We snap at each other, you know? But when we remember, hey, everything's gonna be okay. You know, we love each other, we love our little cute dogs. We have a great life and let's have some fun, you know, in the moments that we can, I think everything feels a lot better. Yeah, and a lot more doable. And
Cora:
00:25:38
I think that we do a really good job of tabling things. I. So, like, for example, if we need to talk about finances, we're just gonna table it until we have time to like look at them. Right. And then we're gonna go through it together. We're gonna make sure we have time on our calendar to like do everything that we need to do and we're gonna get it done. If we're having a tough conversation or one person's like having not a great day or whatever, we like get through it. Mm-hmm. You know, and then, and then we move on. We don't really hold onto things or drag things out because. That does then create this kind of like snowball in a negative way. So I feel like we do a good job of like kind of getting through things, getting it done when it's a less positive day or interaction or whatever it might be. And then we get back to having fun. You know, we can both kind of move on and get through it and then get back to that like playful energy that we love.
Kristina:
00:26:25
Yeah. And one more thing I know that we wanted to talk about too, which I do think is really important and part of this. Playful, um, environment that we're creating is actually the people that we choose to be around a hundred percent. And I know you really wanted to talk about that.
Cora:
00:26:39
Yeah. Well, I just think that we've built this into our relationship and so as we've, especially since we've now moved to, to bend and we've built a community here, that's our community, you know, this is our first time as a couple moving to a new place and building relationships with other couples or. You know, like making friends together, we have absolutely been drawn to and built a community around people who are very similar. They have a lot of fun in their relationships. So we can have fun as couples, we can have fun as individuals and it's very similar relationships, conversations where we can get into nitty gritty, tough stuff. But we can also have like a really great time and be deep belly laughing with these friends. And that's all of our friends here in Bend. And I think that that really helps us continue to embody that lifestyle because we're in it, even when we're on our own. We're in it when we're with our friends and we have a ton of fun. So, um,
Kristina:
00:27:33
yeah. Yeah, that, that's a really big piece of it actually. And I'm glad that we remember to, to bring this up. Yeah. Because, you know, like I've talked about kind of that like routine day where we're working or whatever, and, and sometimes core and I are able to kind of just. Relax and, and laugh together, just the two of us. But sometimes we're like, we need outta the house, right? And so like to have that friend group or to have other people we can bring in who we know are just gonna bring more positivity. And we know we're gonna make us chuckle and we're gonna have a, a fun time with, and it's not gonna be filled with drama. It's not gonna be filled with gossiping, right? It's not gonna be filled with all these other negative things that sometimes friendships are. Um, I, you know, I think that's great. And we also like to do like really active things with our friends too, right. Which helps, again, cultivate that playful mindset. So yeah, friends are a huge piece of. Contributing to that laughter dynamic within our relationship that we have. One last thing that I want to ask you, the seventh
Cora:
00:28:32
last thing.
Kristina:
00:28:34
That's true. But, um, I've been thinking about it and I think it's kind of a fun question, is, is there a type of humor that I have brought into your life that you didn't really have before? And I'm thinking like, if it helps you more like on the TV show or like movie or. Or anything like that that you can think of? I can go first if you can't think
Cora:
00:28:56
of anything, but I can't think of anything. But I do think that you have a different sense. You definitely have a different sense of humor than me. Mm-hmm. And so I think that just seeing things a little bit differently, I like from your perspective has been, um, I don't know, maybe just educational because it's not really how I have. Approach tumor in the past or how, what? Like necessarily what I think is super funny, but I enjoy things now that you think are funny. Hmm. Like I
Kristina:
00:29:25
think that they're funny. Yeah. I guess that's what I asked. But you, you don't, can't think of like a
Cora:
00:29:28
specific example? No, I can't pinpoint anything. Okay. It's kind of like the moments thing, you know, like if it happened I could say, oh, this is what I'm talking about. But I cannot think of anything right now.
Kristina:
00:29:37
Yeah. All I can think about is something that you think is funny that I don't think is funny. Oh, which is the, yeah. Okay, cool. That's the type of humor that I can just like not get my head around. Yeah. To the point where Cora will have it on and I, it actually annoys the out of me and so I'd tell her to turn, I like have to have it off. We have to change the
Cora:
00:29:55
channel. If Christina's even in the living room kitchen area, it needs to be turned off. But if she's in a different room, I even
Kristina:
00:30:02
though get away it, I can still kind of hear it, but I know you
Cora:
00:30:04
can, but you don't say anything until you come into the actual room and then you're like, we need to change it.
Kristina:
00:30:09
So that's something we don't laugh about together, but that's okay. We can each have our own things, show sometimes. Love that. The next podcast we do together should be about like, Are things that we do separately. Hmm. Okay.
Cora:
00:30:21
I'll work on my list. It's probably three things. Just kidding.
Kristina:
00:30:25
All right guys. Well that is what I, we are gonna leave you with today. Um, go out and do some laughing. Yeah. Go laugh with someone, whether it is your romantic partner or friend or someone just. Try and get a good laugh in today. It feels good and it's just a really nice way to, bring some positivity into your life. And stay tuned to next week. Unfortunately Cora won't be here with us anymore, but we'll be back to us on the podcast. Oh yeah. She won't be with us anymore on the podcast, she'll still be here. But, um, it'll be back to a solo episode and I have some really fun, exciting things to share with you. So like I always do. I'm gonna leave you with this. Changing your path will not be easy. It will be challenging. I will say that over and over again, but it will be worth it. Do a self-check today. Are you on your path up your mountain? And if not, what path are you on?
