WEBVTT
00:00:31.850 --> 00:00:34.170
Hello and welcome back.
00:00:34.490 --> 00:00:42.329
So this week's episode is a bit, it might be a bit soapboxy, but it's definitely different.
00:00:42.490 --> 00:00:47.769
And it's definitely something that has been on my mind for a little while.
00:00:48.090 --> 00:00:52.649
Um I wasn't sure what to talk about this time on the podcast.
00:00:52.890 --> 00:01:00.969
So I took, as you do, you you you ponder, you think of well, what things have come up in the week, what kind of conversations am I having?
00:01:01.129 --> 00:01:04.250
And then I remember that I've recently done a wedding fair.
00:01:04.730 --> 00:01:08.890
I was very unprepared for this wedding fair, it's a very last-minute decision.
00:01:09.049 --> 00:01:14.730
Um, and following the house move earlier this year, still discovered that I don't know where some of my stuff is.
00:01:15.049 --> 00:01:19.290
So very quickly trying to adapt of how do I do my stand?
00:01:19.530 --> 00:01:24.890
Um, I normally have a TV and I was told I wouldn't have power, so I was trying to think of my alternative setup.
00:01:25.049 --> 00:01:27.849
Then I get there and find that I do have power, great.
00:01:28.250 --> 00:01:31.290
And I realise I don't have my adapter and everything else.
00:01:31.530 --> 00:01:39.769
So it was very different, and I have definitely learned that I need to be more prepared and that there's a reason I make a list for everything.
00:01:40.409 --> 00:01:42.409
And I am getting to a point, I promise.
00:01:42.569 --> 00:01:54.810
Um but in thinking back to the wedding fare, as much as it was quiet, I thought back to all of the conversations I had with people that did stop at my stand.
00:01:57.049 --> 00:02:03.289
The big thing that kept coming up was I don't want to look awkward.
00:02:05.530 --> 00:02:16.890
So they don't want a strictly routine or any routine, but they don't want to look awkward, so they're unsure whether to have lessons.
00:02:19.289 --> 00:02:26.170
That is social media's fault for putting all of these fancy routines out.
00:02:27.370 --> 00:02:47.689
It's also my fault because my social media only shows the fancy routines, and my video reel on my TV only shows the fancy routines because that's all I've done over the last 10 years, because it's all I talk about.
00:02:48.250 --> 00:02:56.250
However, you absolutely can just sway for your fair stance.
00:02:56.890 --> 00:03:02.810
The way to not look awkward and robotic is to practice.
00:03:03.130 --> 00:03:05.370
Most couples go, oh, we'll just sway.
00:03:05.770 --> 00:03:06.969
And don't think about practicing.
00:03:07.210 --> 00:03:10.090
Don't think about, well, hang on, where am I gonna put my arms?
00:03:10.250 --> 00:03:13.610
Are my arms gonna be round my partner's neck?
00:03:13.770 --> 00:03:15.450
Are they gonna be round their waist?
00:03:15.610 --> 00:03:18.010
They're not thinking of how they're gonna hold.
00:03:18.890 --> 00:03:25.050
And you've probably never danced together or moved together in that way ever.
00:03:26.090 --> 00:03:32.730
So you suddenly come to do it on your wedding day, and it feels awkward because you don't know what you're doing.
00:03:32.969 --> 00:03:38.170
But if you'd practiced, you'd feel a bit less awkward.
00:03:39.290 --> 00:03:42.490
And that's what first dance lessons are.
00:03:43.370 --> 00:03:51.290
They're helping you to feel relaxed, look less awkward, and just enjoy that moment.
00:03:51.530 --> 00:03:54.490
And it's why I put together the confidence session.
00:03:54.730 --> 00:04:03.210
One session where we will sway to your song and find where it feels comfortable for you.
00:04:04.969 --> 00:04:14.409
We might add a little twizzle and a dip to get you a picture moment, but essentially we're getting you comfortable with swaying and moving together.
00:04:15.610 --> 00:04:19.290
You may decide actually, I'd like to do something a bit more.
00:04:19.689 --> 00:04:20.969
Great, we can do that.
00:04:21.129 --> 00:04:23.209
And then you've got your fancy routine.
00:04:23.930 --> 00:04:25.529
But it is okay.
00:04:26.170 --> 00:04:34.009
And as I have said multiple times, it is also okay to not do a first dance at all.
00:04:34.810 --> 00:04:36.810
No one says you have to.
00:04:37.370 --> 00:04:44.089
Beyond tradition, no one says you actually have to, and even if it is tradition, let's face it, we're in 2026.
00:04:45.209 --> 00:04:47.689
Tradition's kind of going out the window.
00:04:48.169 --> 00:04:58.889
But before you make that decision, make sure you read my book to look at all of the things that you need to consider for your first dance before you make the decision to just scrap it.
00:04:59.849 --> 00:05:02.009
Because is it that it scares you?
00:05:04.729 --> 00:05:07.689
Or is it that you just don't know what to do?
00:05:09.209 --> 00:05:11.129
So that's myth number one.
00:05:11.370 --> 00:05:21.930
That, and probably the main myth, actually, think about it for the podcast today, that first dance lessons means you have to do a strictly come dancing fancy routine.
00:05:22.409 --> 00:05:27.529
And absolutely, yes, you can do, but that's not what they're only for.
00:05:28.009 --> 00:05:45.769
And so I am on a mission to change that and get more people swaying together in time to the music and feeling comfortable and confident with that moment.
00:05:47.370 --> 00:06:05.930
What you don't realise, and I shared this on my emails recently, what you don't realise is that by having that lesson to get you comfortable with that moment, it actually makes you comfortable for the rest of your wedding.
00:06:06.490 --> 00:06:17.449
You will find that standing at the front and having to say your vows, you might feel a little bit calmer at having all eyes on you.
00:06:18.810 --> 00:06:34.490
You may find that when you come to do your speech, the nerves are a little bit tame because we've got you comfortable with having all eyes on you.
00:06:34.889 --> 00:06:38.889
And now you might question that when actually your lesson is only going to be me.
00:06:40.250 --> 00:06:59.049
But if you can be comfortable in roughly an hour session with someone who, let's face it, is a complete stranger, and you've welcomed them into your home, you can take that feeling for the rest of your wedding.
00:06:59.289 --> 00:07:14.490
So, yes, I'm helping you to feel calm and confident in a very special spotlight moment, but that feeling will carry on through the whole of your wedding day.
00:07:14.729 --> 00:07:21.529
From the moment you're getting ready right through till you carried away at the end of the night.
00:07:21.930 --> 00:07:33.930
So I'm on a mission to change the view about first dance, to have more people do a first dance, but to feel less awkward with it.
00:07:34.009 --> 00:07:50.089
And yes, I know my book title is tongue in cheek of awkward swaying is not your only choice, and it's true, awkward swaying isn't your only choice, because you can have a single lesson with me, and we'll get you swaying confidently.
00:07:51.609 --> 00:07:59.849
So that's my myth for you today for first dances, and there's a whole little series of myths coming, but that's the biggest myth.
00:08:00.169 --> 00:08:10.409
The first dance has to be fancy, it doesn't, it can be simple, it just needs practice.
00:08:11.449 --> 00:08:13.609
So until next time.
00:00:31.850 --> 00:00:34.170
Hello and welcome back.
00:00:34.490 --> 00:00:42.329
So this week's episode is a bit, it might be a bit soapboxy, but it's definitely different.
00:00:42.490 --> 00:00:47.769
And it's definitely something that has been on my mind for a little while.
00:00:48.090 --> 00:00:52.649
Um I wasn't sure what to talk about this time on the podcast.
00:00:52.890 --> 00:01:00.969
So I took, as you do, you you you ponder, you think of well, what things have come up in the week, what kind of conversations am I having?
00:01:01.129 --> 00:01:04.250
And then I remember that I've recently done a wedding fair.
00:01:04.730 --> 00:01:08.890
I was very unprepared for this wedding fair, it's a very last-minute decision.
00:01:09.049 --> 00:01:14.730
Um, and following the house move earlier this year, still discovered that I don't know where some of my stuff is.
00:01:15.049 --> 00:01:19.290
So very quickly trying to adapt of how do I do my stand?
00:01:19.530 --> 00:01:24.890
Um, I normally have a TV and I was told I wouldn't have power, so I was trying to think of my alternative setup.
00:01:25.049 --> 00:01:27.849
Then I get there and find that I do have power, great.
00:01:28.250 --> 00:01:31.290
And I realise I don't have my adapter and everything else.
00:01:31.530 --> 00:01:39.769
So it was very different, and I have definitely learned that I need to be more prepared and that there's a reason I make a list for everything.
00:01:40.409 --> 00:01:42.409
And I am getting to a point, I promise.
00:01:42.569 --> 00:01:54.810
Um but in thinking back to the wedding fare, as much as it was quiet, I thought back to all of the conversations I had with people that did stop at my stand.
00:01:57.049 --> 00:02:03.289
The big thing that kept coming up was I don't want to look awkward.
00:02:05.530 --> 00:02:16.890
So they don't want a strictly routine or any routine, but they don't want to look awkward, so they're unsure whether to have lessons.
00:02:19.289 --> 00:02:26.170
That is social media's fault for putting all of these fancy routines out.
00:02:27.370 --> 00:02:47.689
It's also my fault because my social media only shows the fancy routines, and my video reel on my TV only shows the fancy routines because that's all I've done over the last 10 years, because it's all I talk about.
00:02:48.250 --> 00:02:56.250
However, you absolutely can just sway for your fair stance.
00:02:56.890 --> 00:03:02.810
The way to not look awkward and robotic is to practice.
00:03:03.130 --> 00:03:05.370
Most couples go, oh, we'll just sway.
00:03:05.770 --> 00:03:06.969
And don't think about practicing.
00:03:07.210 --> 00:03:10.090
Don't think about, well, hang on, where am I gonna put my arms?
00:03:10.250 --> 00:03:13.610
Are my arms gonna be round my partner's neck?
00:03:13.770 --> 00:03:15.450
Are they gonna be round their waist?
00:03:15.610 --> 00:03:18.010
They're not thinking of how they're gonna hold.
00:03:18.890 --> 00:03:25.050
And you've probably never danced together or moved together in that way ever.
00:03:26.090 --> 00:03:32.730
So you suddenly come to do it on your wedding day, and it feels awkward because you don't know what you're doing.
00:03:32.969 --> 00:03:38.170
But if you'd practiced, you'd feel a bit less awkward.
00:03:39.290 --> 00:03:42.490
And that's what first dance lessons are.
00:03:43.370 --> 00:03:51.290
They're helping you to feel relaxed, look less awkward, and just enjoy that moment.
00:03:51.530 --> 00:03:54.490
And it's why I put together the confidence session.
00:03:54.730 --> 00:04:03.210
One session where we will sway to your song and find where it feels comfortable for you.
00:04:04.969 --> 00:04:14.409
We might add a little twizzle and a dip to get you a picture moment, but essentially we're getting you comfortable with swaying and moving together.
00:04:15.610 --> 00:04:19.290
You may decide actually, I'd like to do something a bit more.
00:04:19.689 --> 00:04:20.969
Great, we can do that.
00:04:21.129 --> 00:04:23.209
And then you've got your fancy routine.
00:04:23.930 --> 00:04:25.529
But it is okay.
00:04:26.170 --> 00:04:34.009
And as I have said multiple times, it is also okay to not do a first dance at all.
00:04:34.810 --> 00:04:36.810
No one says you have to.
00:04:37.370 --> 00:04:44.089
Beyond tradition, no one says you actually have to, and even if it is tradition, let's face it, we're in 2026.
00:04:45.209 --> 00:04:47.689
Tradition's kind of going out the window.
00:04:48.169 --> 00:04:58.889
But before you make that decision, make sure you read my book to look at all of the things that you need to consider for your first dance before you make the decision to just scrap it.
00:04:59.849 --> 00:05:02.009
Because is it that it scares you?
00:05:04.729 --> 00:05:07.689
Or is it that you just don't know what to do?
00:05:09.209 --> 00:05:11.129
So that's myth number one.
00:05:11.370 --> 00:05:21.930
That, and probably the main myth, actually, think about it for the podcast today, that first dance lessons means you have to do a strictly come dancing fancy routine.
00:05:22.409 --> 00:05:27.529
And absolutely, yes, you can do, but that's not what they're only for.
00:05:28.009 --> 00:05:45.769
And so I am on a mission to change that and get more people swaying together in time to the music and feeling comfortable and confident with that moment.
00:05:47.370 --> 00:06:05.930
What you don't realise, and I shared this on my emails recently, what you don't realise is that by having that lesson to get you comfortable with that moment, it actually makes you comfortable for the rest of your wedding.
00:06:06.490 --> 00:06:17.449
You will find that standing at the front and having to say your vows, you might feel a little bit calmer at having all eyes on you.
00:06:18.810 --> 00:06:34.490
You may find that when you come to do your speech, the nerves are a little bit tame because we've got you comfortable with having all eyes on you.
00:06:34.889 --> 00:06:38.889
And now you might question that when actually your lesson is only going to be me.
00:06:40.250 --> 00:06:59.049
But if you can be comfortable in roughly an hour session with someone who, let's face it, is a complete stranger, and you've welcomed them into your home, you can take that feeling for the rest of your wedding.
00:06:59.289 --> 00:07:14.490
So, yes, I'm helping you to feel calm and confident in a very special spotlight moment, but that feeling will carry on through the whole of your wedding day.
00:07:14.729 --> 00:07:21.529
From the moment you're getting ready right through till you carried away at the end of the night.
00:07:21.930 --> 00:07:33.930
So I'm on a mission to change the view about first dance, to have more people do a first dance, but to feel less awkward with it.
00:07:34.009 --> 00:07:50.089
And yes, I know my book title is tongue in cheek of awkward swaying is not your only choice, and it's true, awkward swaying isn't your only choice, because you can have a single lesson with me, and we'll get you swaying confidently.
00:07:51.609 --> 00:07:59.849
So that's my myth for you today for first dances, and there's a whole little series of myths coming, but that's the biggest myth.
00:08:00.169 --> 00:08:10.409
The first dance has to be fancy, it doesn't, it can be simple, it just needs practice.
00:08:11.449 --> 00:08:13.609
So until next time.
