00:00:18Introduction to Heavy Conversation
00:00:58Transition to New Beginnings
00:10:53The Rise of AI and Its Impact
00:13:13Advocating Against Weight-Based Discrimination
00:24:59Revisiting DEI Policies and Weight Discrimination
ABOUT THIS EPISODE
After a six-month break, Heavy Conversation is back—and we’re jumping right into it. This week, we’re talking about weight-based discrimination: what it looks like, where we’ve experienced it, and how we’ve learned to push back. From being overlooked in public to dealing with bias in the workplace, we’re sharing our strategies for speaking up, staying confident, and setting boundaries.
We also highlight a few organizations doing important work in this space, including NAAFA.org, ASDAH.org, and WorkplaceFairness.org.
Plus, Bruce got an interesting new TV from Telly—a free smart television with a built-in second screen that plays ads while you watch.
English
United States
SHOW NOTES 🔗
TRANSCRIPT 🔗
Speaker A
00:00:18
This is Heavy Conversation with Bruce and Jody, a podcast where we talk about being a big guy in today's world.
Speaker B
00:00:23
I'm Bruce.
Speaker A
00:00:23
And I'm Jody.
Speaker A
00:00:24
Here we go.
Speaker A
00:00:27
All right.
Speaker B
00:00:28
Here we go.
Speaker B
00:00:29
All right.
Speaker A
00:00:31
Hey, Bruce, Jody.
Speaker B
00:00:35
What's up?
Speaker A
00:00:36
Long time, no talk and no see.
Speaker B
00:00:38
It has been a long time.
Speaker A
00:00:40
Yeah, it has.
Speaker B
00:00:41
Happy New Year.
Speaker A
00:00:43
Happy new year.
Speaker A
00:00:44
Happy St.
Speaker A
00:00:45
Patrick's Day.
Speaker A
00:00:46
Happy Valentine's Day.
Speaker B
00:00:47
Well, good.
Speaker B
00:00:48
We're back and recording and we've got everything set up.
Speaker B
00:00:52
Our setups are a little different this time around, so give it a little time to kind of work that out.
Speaker B
00:00:58
Yeah.
Speaker A
00:00:59
Just to maybe quickly update.
Speaker A
00:01:01
I'm in Chicago now.
Speaker A
00:01:03
I moved just the end of 2024, so been here a little bit, getting adjusted, getting settled, all that jazz.
Speaker A
00:01:11
So thanks for bearing with me and us and a little bit of transition time.
Speaker A
00:01:19
So.
Speaker B
00:01:19
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:01:19
So we're back.
Speaker B
00:01:20
We've got fun episodes planned, Some good stuff to go through.
Speaker A
00:01:24
It's April.
Speaker A
00:01:24
It's going to be my birthday soon.
Speaker B
00:01:26
Where did March go?
Speaker B
00:01:28
Because I feel like March just started and now here we are and good.
Speaker A
00:01:34
Midwester, whatever the word is.
Speaker A
00:01:37
It's been like it was 70, like a couple days ago, and then now it's very cold and gross again.
Speaker B
00:01:46
So Chicago, definitely some.
Speaker B
00:01:48
Some extreme weather.
Speaker A
00:01:50
Even like neighborhood.
Speaker A
00:01:52
Like I was downtown, I work downtown, and it was like 70 and muggy.
Speaker A
00:01:56
And then I go to the Rogers park area and it's a little bit closer to the lake.
Speaker A
00:02:01
I think maybe that's why, because it was chilly.
Speaker B
00:02:05
How do you like Chicago?
Speaker B
00:02:06
Are you getting used to it?
Speaker B
00:02:06
Kind of getting.
Speaker A
00:02:07
Yeah, it's been really fun, like exploring all the new places and hopefully with the weather being nice, I'll be able to explore a little bit more.
Speaker A
00:02:17
I didn't do a ton the first few months just because it was gross and cold and all that.
Speaker A
00:02:22
But, you know, I went to the Bean for the first time or I don't know what it's actually called.
Speaker A
00:02:29
It's got a real name, but everyone calls it the Bean down in Millennium Park.
Speaker A
00:02:33
Explored around in there, but yeah, doing a little touristy things.
Speaker B
00:02:37
But what has been going on here?
Speaker B
00:02:39
Man, I feel like I've just been, you know, running the gauntlet, working non stop, kind of getting things together.
Speaker B
00:02:45
Last month was Chubster's 14th anniversary.
Speaker B
00:02:53
It's the anniversary thing is always weird for me because I really started working on it and putting it together and getting it going in 2010, but it went live, like as its own website in 2011.
Speaker B
00:03:09
So it started on Tumblr in 2010.
Speaker B
00:03:13
Not called Chubster at the time.
Speaker B
00:03:15
So I don't really, you know, I don't look at that as like the, the anniversary.
Speaker B
00:03:20
It's March 15, 2011.
Speaker B
00:03:23
14 years, so.
Speaker A
00:03:26
Well, happy 14th anniversary.
Speaker B
00:03:29
Yes.
Speaker B
00:03:30
Yes.
Speaker A
00:03:31
Look where you are now.
Speaker B
00:03:32
I know.
Speaker B
00:03:33
Look where I am in a glamorous garage.
Speaker A
00:03:36
It's beautiful.
Speaker A
00:03:38
It's your garage.
Speaker B
00:03:40
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:03:41
You know, this space has been really, has been really good to me.
Speaker B
00:03:43
Like I've been able to move things around a lot and kind of get it all set up.
Speaker B
00:03:47
And I mean, as of now, it's kind of an area here where I've got my office desk, all that kind of stuff, all the Chubster stuff I need.
Speaker B
00:03:56
Then there's like a couch, there's this giant tv.
Speaker B
00:04:01
I'll have to tell you all about this TV and kind of how this came about and all that.
Speaker B
00:04:07
But there's a TV on the other side of that.
Speaker B
00:04:09
There's this couch and my drum set.
Speaker A
00:04:11
I've been playing a little mini tour.
Speaker B
00:04:14
Yes.
Speaker B
00:04:14
Playing drums like crazy.
Speaker B
00:04:16
So I had to have a place that I could put the drums and kind of be all set up.
Speaker B
00:04:20
And then the other side of the room is like bikes.
Speaker B
00:04:24
I've got it set up in a way that I can kind of move things around pretty easily.
Speaker B
00:04:27
I mean, I've even got the TV on one of those like rolling stands.
Speaker B
00:04:32
So it's like.
Speaker B
00:04:33
Yeah, so the tv, you're like the.
Speaker A
00:04:35
Substitute teacher that brings in the tv.
Speaker A
00:04:38
Just roll it.
Speaker B
00:04:39
Totally, yeah.
Speaker B
00:04:41
So this tv, there's this, there's this company that a few years ago decided that they wanted to make a, like a flat screen tv, a modern television that they gave away for free in exchange for showing you ads.
Speaker B
00:05:00
So for advertising to you, it's a company called Telly.
Speaker B
00:05:03
I read something about it.
Speaker B
00:05:04
I read an article, this was like two years ago.
Speaker B
00:05:06
I read this article and they had a sign up thing, you know, sign up if you want to be on the list.
Speaker B
00:05:10
So I signed up and I heard nothing and I forgot about it for about two years.
Speaker B
00:05:18
And then I got an email and it said, your TV is ready to ship.
Speaker B
00:05:23
And I was like, what?
Speaker A
00:05:25
What?
Speaker B
00:05:25
So, yeah, yeah, so I got it.
Speaker B
00:05:29
I think beginning of this year it might have been like January, something like that.
Speaker B
00:05:34
January, February.
Speaker B
00:05:35
I don't remember exactly.
Speaker B
00:05:36
It's been a few months.
Speaker B
00:05:37
Now.
Speaker B
00:05:37
The tele TV is, I think it's a 55 inch TV.
Speaker B
00:05:43
So it's, it's as long as you would expect, a 55 inch TV to be, but it is tall because it's not just the 55 inch screen.
Speaker B
00:05:52
It's also, there is a second screen that goes across the bottom that's about 20 inches and it has weather, stocks, news.
Speaker B
00:06:02
You can set it up to have whatever you want across the bottom.
Speaker B
00:06:07
And then there's a little area that's probably like eight inches, six.
Speaker B
00:06:13
I don't know.
Speaker B
00:06:13
It's a smaller part of that that shows ads and the ads seem to, they kind of get a, they kind of get better based on what you're watching.
Speaker B
00:06:25
With the thing.
Speaker B
00:06:26
It's a really tall tv.
Speaker B
00:06:29
It's got a sound bar like built in.
Speaker B
00:06:32
So it's between the small screen at the very bottom and the main screen.
Speaker B
00:06:37
And it sounds great.
Speaker B
00:06:39
It's got like a bunch of speakers in this bar that are integrated into it.
Speaker B
00:06:43
On the back it has like LED lights.
Speaker B
00:06:47
So it does like backlighting.
Speaker B
00:06:48
You can change the colors.
Speaker B
00:06:50
You know, right now I've got it on blue.
Speaker B
00:06:51
So every time I turn it, it just like blows.
Speaker B
00:06:54
You know, I've got it on like the rolling thing.
Speaker B
00:06:56
So it just like shoots blue all over the room.
Speaker B
00:07:00
It has a, it has a video camera built in.
Speaker B
00:07:03
It actually has zoom built in.
Speaker B
00:07:05
When you turn on the webcam, it's like closed.
Speaker B
00:07:08
It's like a little door in front of the webcam and it comes down, you know, and then there it is and you can see yourself.
Speaker B
00:07:15
It has games built in.
Speaker B
00:07:17
It has all of this stuff that makes it really interesting and a really, really compelling idea.
Speaker B
00:07:21
You use it, you watch things, you get ads.
Speaker B
00:07:23
If you want to inter with the ads, you can do that.
Speaker B
00:07:26
The ads I've gotten have run the spectrum from like ads for automobiles to ads for travel destinations like on the west coast to condoms.
Speaker B
00:07:38
They're like, we're going to test everything and see, you know, what he actually clicks on.
Speaker B
00:07:43
It runs the spectrum.
Speaker B
00:07:44
But it's not a thing that like, it's not an annoyance.
Speaker B
00:07:48
They've done it, they've really thought this through and the way that they put it together is really solid.
Speaker B
00:07:53
So I got the TV and they give you a, an Android TV stick.
Speaker B
00:08:00
So it's, it's got, you know, you plug, you plug it into the, the HDMI and you can use that to watch all your streaming things.
Speaker B
00:08:07
And this specific device ties in really well with the tv.
Speaker B
00:08:12
So when you turn on the tv, it's got this thing that is like, you know how this is when you go and you stay in a hotel and you turn on the tv, it's on this one channel that's like the hotel channel.
Speaker B
00:08:24
They've got their own, like, telly TV channel.
Speaker B
00:08:28
So when you turn it on, it gives you like the latest news.
Speaker B
00:08:31
And they've got this host and, you know, she's telling all, you know, giving the news and doing all that.
Speaker B
00:08:37
I didn't realize, but she's actually AI.
Speaker B
00:08:40
It's like an AI.
Speaker B
00:08:42
It's a real.
Speaker B
00:08:43
It's a real person.
Speaker B
00:08:44
But she gave her likeness to them and, you know, I guess read a bunch of things so they could do like a whole AI deal.
Speaker B
00:08:51
And, you know, they have interesting news and entertainment, lifestyle, all that kind of stuff.
Speaker B
00:08:57
You can really customize a lot of, you know, what's there.
Speaker B
00:09:01
It'll show ads every so often if you leave it on that.
Speaker B
00:09:04
On that channel.
Speaker B
00:09:05
But I mean, if you can, you know, you can hook other things up to it.
Speaker B
00:09:08
It's just like a regular tv.
Speaker B
00:09:09
It's just an interesting idea.
Speaker B
00:09:11
You know, when I, when I read about that, I thought, okay, I could see something like that working and signed up for it and just forgot about it and did not think it was going to happen.
Speaker B
00:09:18
So now I have this extra TV out here.
Speaker B
00:09:21
So thanks to Telly.
Speaker B
00:09:23
I didn't get it because of Chubster or anything like that.
Speaker B
00:09:26
I just got it because I signed up and I waited a long time.
Speaker B
00:09:30
This is not like an endorsement of the thing, although I do like it so far.
Speaker B
00:09:34
So take it for what that's worth.
Speaker B
00:09:38
A couple months.
Speaker B
00:09:39
You know, we've got one TV in the house.
Speaker B
00:09:42
Before this, we had one TV in the house and that was kind of the TV everybody gathered around when the kids weren't playing video games or whatever.
Speaker B
00:09:51
And so it's nice to have this one as kind of like a dual main TV for those times when, you know, you're tired of watching kids, whatever.
Speaker A
00:10:02
Totally.
Speaker B
00:10:02
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:03
So, yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:04
So it's worked out really well.
Speaker B
00:10:05
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:06
I'd say if you're interested in something like that and the ad side of things doesn't give you the heebie jeebies.
Speaker B
00:10:13
Check it out and for me, you.
Speaker A
00:10:15
Know, or the AI news person.
Speaker B
00:10:18
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:19
You know, it's funny, you really don't notice that she.
Speaker B
00:10:23
That, you know, that it's not that it's AI, like, it looks like her.
Speaker B
00:10:26
If you look closely sometimes, every so often, if you're really like just watching, then you can sometimes see there'll be like a movement where you're like, but I just have it on and kind of let it Go through, you know, on a pretty regular basis just to have something in the background that's not just, you know, music or a podcast or whatever, you don't notice it.
Speaker B
00:10:49
It's a sign of AI to come, I'm sure.
Speaker A
00:10:53
The future of AI.
Speaker A
00:10:55
Yeah, I go back and forth about it sometimes.
Speaker A
00:10:57
Like, I like some of it, but also, like, I, I know that it's taking, taking people's jobs.
Speaker B
00:11:04
Yeah.
Speaker A
00:11:05
Some advancements in technology and it helps out.
Speaker B
00:11:10
I feel like there's a lot of good right now, you know, and there's, there's a lot of, There's a lot of scary stuff, but there's a lot of good that comes out of it, especially when you look at technology and like, the things that I can do that, you know, is so much more difficult for humans and it's going to keep growing.
Speaker B
00:11:31
And I think as, as AI gets smarter and, you know, we don't necessarily.
Speaker B
00:11:37
That will be a thing, but I also feel like there will be better integration between AI and us.
Speaker B
00:11:43
It's more specific access to all of the world's data.
Speaker A
00:11:48
It's only as good as, like, what you put into it.
Speaker B
00:11:52
Right.
Speaker A
00:11:52
Like, I'm thinking like the chat GPT kind of stuff.
Speaker A
00:11:57
Use that in the past for like, ads and writing copy and stuff like that.
Speaker A
00:12:03
Like, as long as you put.
Speaker A
00:12:05
Write your own thing and then ask it to tweak it or do something or like a lot of times now I'll even like, write an email and be like, can you make this sound more professional?
Speaker A
00:12:16
Or like, I'm trying to make this, do this and ask it, but you have to be kind of specific about what you want.
Speaker B
00:12:24
It's handy.
Speaker B
00:12:25
It's handy.
Speaker B
00:12:25
It definitely, you know, there, there, there are a lot of pros, and I feel like at this point there are a lot more pros than cons.
Speaker B
00:12:33
I mean, I definitely think that we have to be very aware of how we use it and all of that, and I think we'll run into a lot of that stuff.
Speaker B
00:12:39
You know, it's been, it's been handy.
Speaker B
00:12:41
It's making me work smarter, which is nice, so.
Speaker B
00:12:45
And a little faster, you know, I'm getting more done in ways that I.
Speaker B
00:12:49
That I wasn't before, so.
Speaker A
00:12:50
Well, yeah, like I said, it'll help you give it your ideas and thoughts and then it'll help kind of either expand or get a little bit or even get more detailed about things or give you some other tweaks.
Speaker B
00:13:02
And so we'll see.
Speaker B
00:13:03
We'll see if we feel that way in a year or two when our AI overlords are here.
Speaker A
00:13:07
When do the terminators get here?
Speaker A
00:13:08
That's what I want to know.
Speaker B
00:13:09
Yeah, we'll see.
Speaker B
00:13:10
Not long.
Speaker B
00:13:11
It's not long.
Speaker B
00:13:13
So we actually do have a topic today that is how to speak out against weight based discrimination.
Speaker A
00:13:20
You know, just kind of wanted to maybe give a couple like resources about how to stand up for yourself in different situations, whether it's at work or in everyday life or the doctor or any of that kind of stuff.
Speaker A
00:13:38
Just making sure that we have or share some resources and maybe some guides about discrimination isn't going to go away anytime soon.
Speaker A
00:13:48
But we have to feel empowered in our bodies to stand up for ourselves and ask for, for the care that we need or the respect that we deserve, all that kind of stuff.
Speaker A
00:13:58
And I mean it can, like I said, it can happen in any sort of environment at the doctor.
Speaker A
00:14:03
You know, a lot of times that's kind of the, the go to for every problem is oh, you need to lose weight.
Speaker A
00:14:09
They're always thinking that that's the only issue when it's like, okay, maybe that will would also help.
Speaker A
00:14:15
But there's more to it than that.
Speaker A
00:14:18
So making sure that you're, you have the courage to stand up for yourself about that.
Speaker A
00:14:24
I think that's the biggest thing when you, especially when you go see it like a new doctor and you have to go through the whole retelling them about your life story and everything and they're always like, oh well you should lose 10 pounds or 50 pounds or whatever it is.
Speaker A
00:14:40
And then that's going to be your fix it all.
Speaker A
00:14:43
And it's like, well actually my depression is, that's the reason why I'm in here is I need a little bit extra help or something.
Speaker A
00:14:51
Just telling me to go lose weight isn't going to happen.
Speaker A
00:14:54
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:14:54
So definitely over the years I've had those doctor experiences where you go in and it's, you know, you need to lose weight and that's the big thing and you're kind of shamed as opposed to assisted.
Speaker B
00:15:06
And it is a real thing and it makes it so that there are a lot of people who don't want to go to the hospital or go to the doctor because they think they're going to shame them, they're going to be embarrassed for the way they look, the way they feel, their weight, whatever it is.
Speaker B
00:15:21
I've definitely had those experiences in the past, but I think over time doing this, doing chubster, you know, I've, I'VE learned to advocate for myself and I have a great doctor now.
Speaker B
00:15:34
She will talk about weight based stuff if I bring it up, but it's not, it's not in that, you know, traditional weight is bad kind of, kind of thing.
Speaker B
00:15:47
It's, it's looking at, it's looking at everything holistically, looking at what are, what are real issues that are, that are bothering me.
Speaker B
00:15:56
She really listens and really wants to work with me to, you know, figure out what, what's best for me.
Speaker B
00:16:04
And I know that I'm fat, so it's not like I need to, it's.
Speaker A
00:16:08
Like, oh, wait, what, what are you.
Speaker B
00:16:10
Talking, what do you mean?
Speaker B
00:16:12
I thought it was £130.
Speaker B
00:16:13
What is this?
Speaker B
00:16:14
You know, so, so I'm aware of that.
Speaker B
00:16:17
And that's not, that doesn't, that doesn't help.
Speaker B
00:16:20
There, there are so many other things and, and my doctor is not, she doesn't just know anything because, you know, oh, that's what it is, or automatically default to, you know, you're heavy.
Speaker B
00:16:34
So this is it.
Speaker B
00:16:35
I think it's really important that if you feel uncomfortable with, especially when we're talking about healthcare and, you know, medical stuff, don't settle.
Speaker B
00:16:45
If you have the opportunity to change doctors and you're with somebody that isn't addressing your concerns, that overlooks you or doesn't listen to you, don't stay with that doctor.
Speaker B
00:16:55
It's not worth it.
Speaker B
00:16:56
There, there are many doctors out there and most insur.
Speaker B
00:16:59
Insurance and most healthcare that you've got, it's going to give you the, the option to find somebody else or work with your healthcare organization, whatever, whatever it is that you're part of, to try to find somebody.
Speaker B
00:17:13
There are a lot of places you can look online to find things as well and really narrow that down and use those resources to help you find what you're looking for.
Speaker A
00:17:22
Yeah, I mean, one of the big things is asking them to focus on your symptoms and not on your weight.
Speaker A
00:17:28
So like, like things that are affecting you, things that you're experiencing, even just saying, I prefer to discuss treatments that don't center around weight loss.
Speaker A
00:17:39
Like what are my options beyond that?
Speaker A
00:17:43
Also there you have an option to bring someone else, a support person with you into most appointments, if not all, either just to be there as support or to help you speak up for yourself.
Speaker A
00:17:54
Like they can be your advocate and it could be anyone from a significant other to friends or anyone that you feel comfortable knowing your history and knowing what's going on with you and just helping you Stand up for yourself.
Speaker A
00:18:08
Those are some big, you know, big things to remember when you go to the doctor.
Speaker B
00:18:13
You don't have to do it alone.
Speaker B
00:18:14
That, that's definitely, that's a, that's a big thing.
Speaker B
00:18:17
And it feels like it's very different in the year of our Lord 20, 25 than it was maybe 10 or 20 years ago where there is better representation in health care.
Speaker B
00:18:32
And now I'm saying that as someone who moved from a small town in Missouri to the west coast to Portland, where there's a lot more representation, there's a lot more openness and understanding.
Speaker B
00:18:44
I'm sure it's not that way everywhere, but I think across the board that healthcare is getting there.
Speaker B
00:18:53
The medical community is, they're understanding all of this stuff a little more than maybe they have in the past.
Speaker B
00:18:59
And so you can use that to, to your advantage and use these resources, make sure that you've got somebody with you like, like you, like you said, I think all that stuff is big.
Speaker B
00:19:08
I think looking around online, looking for actual resources, there are organizations like nafa, the national association to Advance Fat Acceptance.
Speaker B
00:19:17
Nafa, they've been around for a long, long, long time.
Speaker B
00:19:20
Tigers Osborne is over there now and she is the executive director and a board member.
Speaker B
00:19:28
She steers the ship over there and she's awesome.
Speaker B
00:19:31
They are definitely out to fight back against fat based discrimination.
Speaker B
00:19:38
For over 50 years, it says here on the website they've been working to make the world a better place for fat people through education, advocacy and support.
Speaker B
00:19:47
And they do all kinds of great work.
Speaker B
00:19:49
So you should definitely check out their website.
Speaker B
00:19:51
They have an entire like resources section.
Speaker B
00:19:54
It's nafa.org n a a f a dot org and so you can find, there's apps, there's even curriculum.
Speaker A
00:20:03
Yeah, they're definitely a big resource for all the different areas.
Speaker B
00:20:07
Absolutely.
Speaker B
00:20:08
There's so much there.
Speaker B
00:20:10
They have weight neutral health care providers, they have links to these different things that are, you know, community sourced lists.
Speaker B
00:20:18
They have all of these other things you can look at that really can help you out.
Speaker B
00:20:22
As you're trying to figure out how do I, you know, how do I navigate this, how do I deal with issues that I'm, that I'm dealing with every day because of my size.
Speaker B
00:20:30
It's definitely worth taking a look at.
Speaker A
00:20:32
Yeah, I also wanted to mention another one.
Speaker A
00:20:34
It's the association for Size Diversity and Healthcare.
Speaker A
00:20:39
They also have a directory for fat friendly healthcare providers and they're at a S D A h dot org we'll have a list of Resources in the show, notes that you all can check out and click on.
Speaker A
00:20:51
But yeah, they promote health at every size.
Speaker A
00:20:54
A weight inclusive health care approach.
Speaker A
00:20:56
So that's another spot to look for some health care providers that are fat friendly.
Speaker B
00:21:01
One other thing I want to throw in about NAFA is that Tigris osborne made the Time 100 health list last year.
Speaker B
00:21:09
It's the.
Speaker B
00:21:10
The Time 100 was Time magazine's most influential people of 20.
Speaker B
00:21:15
And it's a huge list with amazing people that are doing great things.
Speaker B
00:21:20
And I mean it runs a spectrum from artists to people in healthcare to sports, technology.
Speaker B
00:21:26
I mean, they've got icons.
Speaker B
00:21:28
I'm looking at this, I've seen like Mark Cuban is on the list, Sofia Coppola, Michael J.
Speaker B
00:21:33
Fox, Elliot Page.
Speaker B
00:21:34
Tons of people are on this list and Tigris is on that for the work that she's doing.
Speaker B
00:21:40
Yeah, yeah, really cool.
Speaker A
00:21:42
So like another area that can be difficult is around like family and friends.
Speaker A
00:21:48
Like family gatherings can be difficult sometimes when you have maybe that aunt or uncle or even a parental figure that seems to always want to bring up your weight and that can make it that you don't want to hang out with them, making sure that you're standing up for yourself.
Speaker A
00:22:04
You don't have to be, you know, rude or whatever, but just standing firm and what you are okay with.
Speaker A
00:22:10
I found a couple short little things that you can say to help set some boundaries.
Speaker A
00:22:15
You can say something like, I know that you care, but I'm not open to discussing my body.
Speaker A
00:22:20
I like that you're acknowledging that they're saying something about it but that you don't really want to discuss it.
Speaker A
00:22:26
So I think that's.
Speaker A
00:22:27
Boundaries are, they're tough sometimes, but they're definitely something that we all have to be okay setting.
Speaker B
00:22:33
Yeah, I know there have definitely been times for me in the past where I wish I would have had some kind of comeback or some kind of response to something and I just didn't.
Speaker B
00:22:44
And you know, it's those, those conversations can be difficult.
Speaker B
00:22:49
If you don't want to have them, you don't want to have them.
Speaker B
00:22:51
And you can just lay that out.
Speaker B
00:22:53
Don't be afraid to advocate for yourself.
Speaker B
00:22:55
That's really what it comes down to.
Speaker B
00:22:56
So set your boundaries and go from there.
Speaker A
00:23:00
Yeah, I like this one other one.
Speaker A
00:23:02
It says, I'd rather focus on things that bring us together, not my weight.
Speaker B
00:23:07
Nice, I like that.
Speaker A
00:23:08
So it can kind of help redirect the conversation to things that you, you know, that you've experienced together or Things that you want to do together and whatever that is and not centered around weight issues or your body.
Speaker A
00:23:22
So I'd rather focus on things that bring us together and not my weight.
Speaker B
00:23:26
Weight is still one of those things where, like size and all that, it's still something that.
Speaker B
00:23:30
Where people feel like they can just kind of jump in and give unsolicited advice, and it's.
Speaker B
00:23:37
I hope that changes, but until it does, it's nice to have some kind of.
Speaker B
00:23:42
Some ammo to go out there with, a way to respond, a way to deal with some of this stuff.
Speaker A
00:23:47
Yeah, there's all kinds of Facebook groups and influencers we've talked about in the past, and we'll probably talk about again that if you're still on social media or during your little bit of time on social media, make sure you're following and seeing what they're doing.
Speaker A
00:24:03
It kind of helps reinforce the other images or backlash that we're getting.
Speaker A
00:24:09
You know, focus on some of the great work that these fat advocates are doing and see what they're doing and get some.
Speaker A
00:24:15
Get energized or, you know, whatever by what they're doing and seeing what they're doing and knowing that you can do that kind of stuff, too.
Speaker A
00:24:22
So it's all kinds of people that we've talked about that I'm sure we can highlight again.
Speaker B
00:24:27
Yeah, yeah, I think it's all right.
Speaker B
00:24:31
It's an ongoing conversation.
Speaker B
00:24:33
I think there's a lot to say about it overall, and it's.
Speaker B
00:24:36
It's definitely something that we will have to revisit and I think kind of works into a lot of our conversations as we go along, so.
Speaker A
00:24:43
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker A
00:24:44
You talked about nafa.
Speaker A
00:24:47
They were a big one.
Speaker A
00:24:48
I wanted to talk about in the association for Size, Diversity and Health.
Speaker A
00:24:52
There's also some different laws.
Speaker A
00:24:55
I know that DEI is a big thing that's been in the news a lot, and I.
Speaker A
00:24:59
I just want to maybe touch on it a little bit.
Speaker A
00:25:02
You know, DEI is a very broad and inclusive thing that we're have fought for for a long time.
Speaker A
00:25:12
And so I know that maybe weight and that kind of stuff isn't at the forefront of the most recent conversations around dei, but it.
Speaker A
00:25:22
It does include that there are tons of laws out there that prohibit discrimination based on weight already in a lot of places.
Speaker A
00:25:30
So make sure, especially in the workplace or with your health care provider, make sure that you're documenting any of that kind of discrimination either in emails or some.
Speaker A
00:25:42
Some way, because there are protections out there still in most places.
Speaker A
00:25:46
Yeah, I Don't want to get too political about it.
Speaker A
00:25:50
I think most people know where we stand on those kinds of things, but.
Speaker B
00:25:54
Right.
Speaker A
00:25:55
I know a lot of companies are, are rolling back a lot of those DEI policies or they're rewording things.
Speaker A
00:26:02
So just make sure that you're aware of what's going on.
Speaker A
00:26:05
Most companies are still have policies and procedures around workplace harassment or discrimination.
Speaker A
00:26:12
So make sure, like I said, make sure that you're documenting.
Speaker A
00:26:14
Go bring up things to your HR or managers that is their job to prevent that kind of stuff or to guide you in how to handle those kinds of situations in your workplace.
Speaker A
00:26:25
But there are obviously lots of resources for workplace discrimination.
Speaker A
00:26:31
You know, like what is this workplace fairness.org there?
Speaker A
00:26:35
And information on workplace discrimination laws, including how weight bias intersects with disability and sex discrimination laws.
Speaker A
00:26:43
And then there's this.
Speaker A
00:26:44
I didn't look too in depth in this Harvard implicit bias test, but it does help individuals and employers assess unconscious bias towards fat people, which I thought was kind of interesting.
Speaker A
00:26:56
I didn't take the whole test.
Speaker A
00:26:57
I started it and I was like, okay, this is a little bit much for me right now.
Speaker B
00:27:01
Yeah, it's a lot, a lot of resources.
Speaker B
00:27:03
There's a lot of stuff out there.
Speaker B
00:27:04
We will include some of this in the show notes so that you can take a look through, kind of find some things that stand out to you and hopefully it helps.
Speaker A
00:27:12
Yeah, I mean, I don't know, did you have other big things you wanted to touch on?
Speaker B
00:27:19
I mean, not really next week I will, but this week just kind of us getting back to it and just kind of reconnecting and doing our thing and.
Speaker B
00:27:28
Yeah, we've got a, we've got a lot coming up and yeah, I've got a few other things to talk about but nothing I can talk about yet.
Speaker A
00:27:36
So just maybe final thoughts, how to take some action.
Speaker A
00:27:40
Make sure you're look at, look for resources and do some reading.
Speaker A
00:27:44
Push for policies that you're wanting.
Speaker A
00:27:47
You know, make sure that we're voting the way we want and need to to keep those weight based discriminations out of our workplace and whatever.
Speaker A
00:27:56
But make sure you're following us so that you can help support some fat people and.
Speaker B
00:28:02
Yes.
Speaker A
00:28:03
Well, thanks for starting back up again, Bruce.
Speaker A
00:28:05
I missed you.
Speaker B
00:28:06
Yes, I know, I know, It's.
Speaker B
00:28:08
I missed you too.
Speaker B
00:28:08
It's.
Speaker B
00:28:09
It's been a while.
Speaker B
00:28:09
We're back though.
Speaker B
00:28:11
We're just going to push forward.
Speaker B
00:28:12
We're going to do our best and you know, talk about the things that come up and go from there.
Speaker A
00:28:16
That's what we're here for.
Speaker B
00:28:17
And I will.
Speaker B
00:28:18
I actually do have some new and interesting beers.
Speaker B
00:28:23
Are they good?
Speaker B
00:28:24
I don't know.
Speaker B
00:28:25
Yeah, they're beers that I have not tried before.
Speaker B
00:28:28
Their beers I had not seen.
Speaker A
00:28:30
Yeah, I'm gonna be partnering with a shop just down the street here and getting some interesting beers.
Speaker A
00:28:36
He's excited to be able to help me out with that.
Speaker B
00:28:38
So I.
Speaker B
00:28:39
I think some of the.
Speaker A
00:28:40
Things that I have.
Speaker B
00:28:41
It's going to run the spectrum.
Speaker B
00:28:42
We'll see.
Speaker B
00:28:43
As far as, like, quality tastes.
Speaker A
00:28:45
I had the probably the greenest neony green beer during St.
Speaker A
00:28:49
Patrick's Day.
Speaker A
00:28:50
I'm gonna what the name of it was, but I was like, is this beer or is this, like, some weird chemical antifreeze that I'm drinking?
Speaker A
00:28:59
What is this?
Speaker B
00:28:59
Amazing.
Speaker B
00:29:00
All right, all right.
Speaker B
00:29:03
Well, thank you, Jody.
Speaker B
00:29:04
We'll be back again next week.
Speaker A
00:29:06
All right, bye, everyone.
Speaker B
00:29:07
Bye.
Speaker B
00:29:08
Bye.
Speaker B
00:29:08
Thanks for listening to Heavy Conversation.
Speaker B
00:29:11
Be sure to like and subscribe on itunes or wherever you get your podcast.
Speaker B
00:29:16
Podcast, podcast, podcast.
00:00:18
This is Heavy Conversation with Bruce and Jody, a podcast where we talk about being a big guy in today's world.
Speaker B
00:00:23
I'm Bruce.
Speaker A
00:00:23
And I'm Jody.
Speaker A
00:00:24
Here we go.
Speaker A
00:00:27
All right.
Speaker B
00:00:28
Here we go.
Speaker B
00:00:29
All right.
Speaker A
00:00:31
Hey, Bruce, Jody.
Speaker B
00:00:35
What's up?
Speaker A
00:00:36
Long time, no talk and no see.
Speaker B
00:00:38
It has been a long time.
Speaker A
00:00:40
Yeah, it has.
Speaker B
00:00:41
Happy New Year.
Speaker A
00:00:43
Happy new year.
Speaker A
00:00:44
Happy St.
Speaker A
00:00:45
Patrick's Day.
Speaker A
00:00:46
Happy Valentine's Day.
Speaker B
00:00:47
Well, good.
Speaker B
00:00:48
We're back and recording and we've got everything set up.
Speaker B
00:00:52
Our setups are a little different this time around, so give it a little time to kind of work that out.
Speaker B
00:00:58
Yeah.
Speaker A
00:00:59
Just to maybe quickly update.
Speaker A
00:01:01
I'm in Chicago now.
Speaker A
00:01:03
I moved just the end of 2024, so been here a little bit, getting adjusted, getting settled, all that jazz.
Speaker A
00:01:11
So thanks for bearing with me and us and a little bit of transition time.
Speaker A
00:01:19
So.
Speaker B
00:01:19
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:01:19
So we're back.
Speaker B
00:01:20
We've got fun episodes planned, Some good stuff to go through.
Speaker A
00:01:24
It's April.
Speaker A
00:01:24
It's going to be my birthday soon.
Speaker B
00:01:26
Where did March go?
Speaker B
00:01:28
Because I feel like March just started and now here we are and good.
Speaker A
00:01:34
Midwester, whatever the word is.
Speaker A
00:01:37
It's been like it was 70, like a couple days ago, and then now it's very cold and gross again.
Speaker B
00:01:46
So Chicago, definitely some.
Speaker B
00:01:48
Some extreme weather.
Speaker A
00:01:50
Even like neighborhood.
Speaker A
00:01:52
Like I was downtown, I work downtown, and it was like 70 and muggy.
Speaker A
00:01:56
And then I go to the Rogers park area and it's a little bit closer to the lake.
Speaker A
00:02:01
I think maybe that's why, because it was chilly.
Speaker B
00:02:05
How do you like Chicago?
Speaker B
00:02:06
Are you getting used to it?
Speaker B
00:02:06
Kind of getting.
Speaker A
00:02:07
Yeah, it's been really fun, like exploring all the new places and hopefully with the weather being nice, I'll be able to explore a little bit more.
Speaker A
00:02:17
I didn't do a ton the first few months just because it was gross and cold and all that.
Speaker A
00:02:22
But, you know, I went to the Bean for the first time or I don't know what it's actually called.
Speaker A
00:02:29
It's got a real name, but everyone calls it the Bean down in Millennium Park.
Speaker A
00:02:33
Explored around in there, but yeah, doing a little touristy things.
Speaker B
00:02:37
But what has been going on here?
Speaker B
00:02:39
Man, I feel like I've just been, you know, running the gauntlet, working non stop, kind of getting things together.
Speaker B
00:02:45
Last month was Chubster's 14th anniversary.
Speaker B
00:02:53
It's the anniversary thing is always weird for me because I really started working on it and putting it together and getting it going in 2010, but it went live, like as its own website in 2011.
Speaker B
00:03:09
So it started on Tumblr in 2010.
Speaker B
00:03:13
Not called Chubster at the time.
Speaker B
00:03:15
So I don't really, you know, I don't look at that as like the, the anniversary.
Speaker B
00:03:20
It's March 15, 2011.
Speaker B
00:03:23
14 years, so.
Speaker A
00:03:26
Well, happy 14th anniversary.
Speaker B
00:03:29
Yes.
Speaker B
00:03:30
Yes.
Speaker A
00:03:31
Look where you are now.
Speaker B
00:03:32
I know.
Speaker B
00:03:33
Look where I am in a glamorous garage.
Speaker A
00:03:36
It's beautiful.
Speaker A
00:03:38
It's your garage.
Speaker B
00:03:40
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:03:41
You know, this space has been really, has been really good to me.
Speaker B
00:03:43
Like I've been able to move things around a lot and kind of get it all set up.
Speaker B
00:03:47
And I mean, as of now, it's kind of an area here where I've got my office desk, all that kind of stuff, all the Chubster stuff I need.
Speaker B
00:03:56
Then there's like a couch, there's this giant tv.
Speaker B
00:04:01
I'll have to tell you all about this TV and kind of how this came about and all that.
Speaker B
00:04:07
But there's a TV on the other side of that.
Speaker B
00:04:09
There's this couch and my drum set.
Speaker A
00:04:11
I've been playing a little mini tour.
Speaker B
00:04:14
Yes.
Speaker B
00:04:14
Playing drums like crazy.
Speaker B
00:04:16
So I had to have a place that I could put the drums and kind of be all set up.
Speaker B
00:04:20
And then the other side of the room is like bikes.
Speaker B
00:04:24
I've got it set up in a way that I can kind of move things around pretty easily.
Speaker B
00:04:27
I mean, I've even got the TV on one of those like rolling stands.
Speaker B
00:04:32
So it's like.
Speaker B
00:04:33
Yeah, so the tv, you're like the.
Speaker A
00:04:35
Substitute teacher that brings in the tv.
Speaker A
00:04:38
Just roll it.
Speaker B
00:04:39
Totally, yeah.
Speaker B
00:04:41
So this tv, there's this, there's this company that a few years ago decided that they wanted to make a, like a flat screen tv, a modern television that they gave away for free in exchange for showing you ads.
Speaker B
00:05:00
So for advertising to you, it's a company called Telly.
Speaker B
00:05:03
I read something about it.
Speaker B
00:05:04
I read an article, this was like two years ago.
Speaker B
00:05:06
I read this article and they had a sign up thing, you know, sign up if you want to be on the list.
Speaker B
00:05:10
So I signed up and I heard nothing and I forgot about it for about two years.
Speaker B
00:05:18
And then I got an email and it said, your TV is ready to ship.
Speaker B
00:05:23
And I was like, what?
Speaker A
00:05:25
What?
Speaker B
00:05:25
So, yeah, yeah, so I got it.
Speaker B
00:05:29
I think beginning of this year it might have been like January, something like that.
Speaker B
00:05:34
January, February.
Speaker B
00:05:35
I don't remember exactly.
Speaker B
00:05:36
It's been a few months.
Speaker B
00:05:37
Now.
Speaker B
00:05:37
The tele TV is, I think it's a 55 inch TV.
Speaker B
00:05:43
So it's, it's as long as you would expect, a 55 inch TV to be, but it is tall because it's not just the 55 inch screen.
Speaker B
00:05:52
It's also, there is a second screen that goes across the bottom that's about 20 inches and it has weather, stocks, news.
Speaker B
00:06:02
You can set it up to have whatever you want across the bottom.
Speaker B
00:06:07
And then there's a little area that's probably like eight inches, six.
Speaker B
00:06:13
I don't know.
Speaker B
00:06:13
It's a smaller part of that that shows ads and the ads seem to, they kind of get a, they kind of get better based on what you're watching.
Speaker B
00:06:25
With the thing.
Speaker B
00:06:26
It's a really tall tv.
Speaker B
00:06:29
It's got a sound bar like built in.
Speaker B
00:06:32
So it's between the small screen at the very bottom and the main screen.
Speaker B
00:06:37
And it sounds great.
Speaker B
00:06:39
It's got like a bunch of speakers in this bar that are integrated into it.
Speaker B
00:06:43
On the back it has like LED lights.
Speaker B
00:06:47
So it does like backlighting.
Speaker B
00:06:48
You can change the colors.
Speaker B
00:06:50
You know, right now I've got it on blue.
Speaker B
00:06:51
So every time I turn it, it just like blows.
Speaker B
00:06:54
You know, I've got it on like the rolling thing.
Speaker B
00:06:56
So it just like shoots blue all over the room.
Speaker B
00:07:00
It has a, it has a video camera built in.
Speaker B
00:07:03
It actually has zoom built in.
Speaker B
00:07:05
When you turn on the webcam, it's like closed.
Speaker B
00:07:08
It's like a little door in front of the webcam and it comes down, you know, and then there it is and you can see yourself.
Speaker B
00:07:15
It has games built in.
Speaker B
00:07:17
It has all of this stuff that makes it really interesting and a really, really compelling idea.
Speaker B
00:07:21
You use it, you watch things, you get ads.
Speaker B
00:07:23
If you want to inter with the ads, you can do that.
Speaker B
00:07:26
The ads I've gotten have run the spectrum from like ads for automobiles to ads for travel destinations like on the west coast to condoms.
Speaker B
00:07:38
They're like, we're going to test everything and see, you know, what he actually clicks on.
Speaker B
00:07:43
It runs the spectrum.
Speaker B
00:07:44
But it's not a thing that like, it's not an annoyance.
Speaker B
00:07:48
They've done it, they've really thought this through and the way that they put it together is really solid.
Speaker B
00:07:53
So I got the TV and they give you a, an Android TV stick.
Speaker B
00:08:00
So it's, it's got, you know, you plug, you plug it into the, the HDMI and you can use that to watch all your streaming things.
Speaker B
00:08:07
And this specific device ties in really well with the tv.
Speaker B
00:08:12
So when you turn on the tv, it's got this thing that is like, you know how this is when you go and you stay in a hotel and you turn on the tv, it's on this one channel that's like the hotel channel.
Speaker B
00:08:24
They've got their own, like, telly TV channel.
Speaker B
00:08:28
So when you turn it on, it gives you like the latest news.
Speaker B
00:08:31
And they've got this host and, you know, she's telling all, you know, giving the news and doing all that.
Speaker B
00:08:37
I didn't realize, but she's actually AI.
Speaker B
00:08:40
It's like an AI.
Speaker B
00:08:42
It's a real.
Speaker B
00:08:43
It's a real person.
Speaker B
00:08:44
But she gave her likeness to them and, you know, I guess read a bunch of things so they could do like a whole AI deal.
Speaker B
00:08:51
And, you know, they have interesting news and entertainment, lifestyle, all that kind of stuff.
Speaker B
00:08:57
You can really customize a lot of, you know, what's there.
Speaker B
00:09:01
It'll show ads every so often if you leave it on that.
Speaker B
00:09:04
On that channel.
Speaker B
00:09:05
But I mean, if you can, you know, you can hook other things up to it.
Speaker B
00:09:08
It's just like a regular tv.
Speaker B
00:09:09
It's just an interesting idea.
Speaker B
00:09:11
You know, when I, when I read about that, I thought, okay, I could see something like that working and signed up for it and just forgot about it and did not think it was going to happen.
Speaker B
00:09:18
So now I have this extra TV out here.
Speaker B
00:09:21
So thanks to Telly.
Speaker B
00:09:23
I didn't get it because of Chubster or anything like that.
Speaker B
00:09:26
I just got it because I signed up and I waited a long time.
Speaker B
00:09:30
This is not like an endorsement of the thing, although I do like it so far.
Speaker B
00:09:34
So take it for what that's worth.
Speaker B
00:09:38
A couple months.
Speaker B
00:09:39
You know, we've got one TV in the house.
Speaker B
00:09:42
Before this, we had one TV in the house and that was kind of the TV everybody gathered around when the kids weren't playing video games or whatever.
Speaker B
00:09:51
And so it's nice to have this one as kind of like a dual main TV for those times when, you know, you're tired of watching kids, whatever.
Speaker A
00:10:02
Totally.
Speaker B
00:10:02
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:03
So, yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:04
So it's worked out really well.
Speaker B
00:10:05
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:06
I'd say if you're interested in something like that and the ad side of things doesn't give you the heebie jeebies.
Speaker B
00:10:13
Check it out and for me, you.
Speaker A
00:10:15
Know, or the AI news person.
Speaker B
00:10:18
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:10:19
You know, it's funny, you really don't notice that she.
Speaker B
00:10:23
That, you know, that it's not that it's AI, like, it looks like her.
Speaker B
00:10:26
If you look closely sometimes, every so often, if you're really like just watching, then you can sometimes see there'll be like a movement where you're like, but I just have it on and kind of let it Go through, you know, on a pretty regular basis just to have something in the background that's not just, you know, music or a podcast or whatever, you don't notice it.
Speaker B
00:10:49
It's a sign of AI to come, I'm sure.
Speaker A
00:10:53
The future of AI.
Speaker A
00:10:55
Yeah, I go back and forth about it sometimes.
Speaker A
00:10:57
Like, I like some of it, but also, like, I, I know that it's taking, taking people's jobs.
Speaker B
00:11:04
Yeah.
Speaker A
00:11:05
Some advancements in technology and it helps out.
Speaker B
00:11:10
I feel like there's a lot of good right now, you know, and there's, there's a lot of, There's a lot of scary stuff, but there's a lot of good that comes out of it, especially when you look at technology and like, the things that I can do that, you know, is so much more difficult for humans and it's going to keep growing.
Speaker B
00:11:31
And I think as, as AI gets smarter and, you know, we don't necessarily.
Speaker B
00:11:37
That will be a thing, but I also feel like there will be better integration between AI and us.
Speaker B
00:11:43
It's more specific access to all of the world's data.
Speaker A
00:11:48
It's only as good as, like, what you put into it.
Speaker B
00:11:52
Right.
Speaker A
00:11:52
Like, I'm thinking like the chat GPT kind of stuff.
Speaker A
00:11:57
Use that in the past for like, ads and writing copy and stuff like that.
Speaker A
00:12:03
Like, as long as you put.
Speaker A
00:12:05
Write your own thing and then ask it to tweak it or do something or like a lot of times now I'll even like, write an email and be like, can you make this sound more professional?
Speaker A
00:12:16
Or like, I'm trying to make this, do this and ask it, but you have to be kind of specific about what you want.
Speaker B
00:12:24
It's handy.
Speaker B
00:12:25
It's handy.
Speaker B
00:12:25
It definitely, you know, there, there, there are a lot of pros, and I feel like at this point there are a lot more pros than cons.
Speaker B
00:12:33
I mean, I definitely think that we have to be very aware of how we use it and all of that, and I think we'll run into a lot of that stuff.
Speaker B
00:12:39
You know, it's been, it's been handy.
Speaker B
00:12:41
It's making me work smarter, which is nice, so.
Speaker B
00:12:45
And a little faster, you know, I'm getting more done in ways that I.
Speaker B
00:12:49
That I wasn't before, so.
Speaker A
00:12:50
Well, yeah, like I said, it'll help you give it your ideas and thoughts and then it'll help kind of either expand or get a little bit or even get more detailed about things or give you some other tweaks.
Speaker B
00:13:02
And so we'll see.
Speaker B
00:13:03
We'll see if we feel that way in a year or two when our AI overlords are here.
Speaker A
00:13:07
When do the terminators get here?
Speaker A
00:13:08
That's what I want to know.
Speaker B
00:13:09
Yeah, we'll see.
Speaker B
00:13:10
Not long.
Speaker B
00:13:11
It's not long.
Speaker B
00:13:13
So we actually do have a topic today that is how to speak out against weight based discrimination.
Speaker A
00:13:20
You know, just kind of wanted to maybe give a couple like resources about how to stand up for yourself in different situations, whether it's at work or in everyday life or the doctor or any of that kind of stuff.
Speaker A
00:13:38
Just making sure that we have or share some resources and maybe some guides about discrimination isn't going to go away anytime soon.
Speaker A
00:13:48
But we have to feel empowered in our bodies to stand up for ourselves and ask for, for the care that we need or the respect that we deserve, all that kind of stuff.
Speaker A
00:13:58
And I mean it can, like I said, it can happen in any sort of environment at the doctor.
Speaker A
00:14:03
You know, a lot of times that's kind of the, the go to for every problem is oh, you need to lose weight.
Speaker A
00:14:09
They're always thinking that that's the only issue when it's like, okay, maybe that will would also help.
Speaker A
00:14:15
But there's more to it than that.
Speaker A
00:14:18
So making sure that you're, you have the courage to stand up for yourself about that.
Speaker A
00:14:24
I think that's the biggest thing when you, especially when you go see it like a new doctor and you have to go through the whole retelling them about your life story and everything and they're always like, oh well you should lose 10 pounds or 50 pounds or whatever it is.
Speaker A
00:14:40
And then that's going to be your fix it all.
Speaker A
00:14:43
And it's like, well actually my depression is, that's the reason why I'm in here is I need a little bit extra help or something.
Speaker A
00:14:51
Just telling me to go lose weight isn't going to happen.
Speaker A
00:14:54
Yeah.
Speaker B
00:14:54
So definitely over the years I've had those doctor experiences where you go in and it's, you know, you need to lose weight and that's the big thing and you're kind of shamed as opposed to assisted.
Speaker B
00:15:06
And it is a real thing and it makes it so that there are a lot of people who don't want to go to the hospital or go to the doctor because they think they're going to shame them, they're going to be embarrassed for the way they look, the way they feel, their weight, whatever it is.
Speaker B
00:15:21
I've definitely had those experiences in the past, but I think over time doing this, doing chubster, you know, I've, I'VE learned to advocate for myself and I have a great doctor now.
Speaker B
00:15:34
She will talk about weight based stuff if I bring it up, but it's not, it's not in that, you know, traditional weight is bad kind of, kind of thing.
Speaker B
00:15:47
It's, it's looking at, it's looking at everything holistically, looking at what are, what are real issues that are, that are bothering me.
Speaker B
00:15:56
She really listens and really wants to work with me to, you know, figure out what, what's best for me.
Speaker B
00:16:04
And I know that I'm fat, so it's not like I need to, it's.
Speaker A
00:16:08
Like, oh, wait, what, what are you.
Speaker B
00:16:10
Talking, what do you mean?
Speaker B
00:16:12
I thought it was £130.
Speaker B
00:16:13
What is this?
Speaker B
00:16:14
You know, so, so I'm aware of that.
Speaker B
00:16:17
And that's not, that doesn't, that doesn't help.
Speaker B
00:16:20
There, there are so many other things and, and my doctor is not, she doesn't just know anything because, you know, oh, that's what it is, or automatically default to, you know, you're heavy.
Speaker B
00:16:34
So this is it.
Speaker B
00:16:35
I think it's really important that if you feel uncomfortable with, especially when we're talking about healthcare and, you know, medical stuff, don't settle.
Speaker B
00:16:45
If you have the opportunity to change doctors and you're with somebody that isn't addressing your concerns, that overlooks you or doesn't listen to you, don't stay with that doctor.
Speaker B
00:16:55
It's not worth it.
Speaker B
00:16:56
There, there are many doctors out there and most insur.
Speaker B
00:16:59
Insurance and most healthcare that you've got, it's going to give you the, the option to find somebody else or work with your healthcare organization, whatever, whatever it is that you're part of, to try to find somebody.
Speaker B
00:17:13
There are a lot of places you can look online to find things as well and really narrow that down and use those resources to help you find what you're looking for.
Speaker A
00:17:22
Yeah, I mean, one of the big things is asking them to focus on your symptoms and not on your weight.
Speaker A
00:17:28
So like, like things that are affecting you, things that you're experiencing, even just saying, I prefer to discuss treatments that don't center around weight loss.
Speaker A
00:17:39
Like what are my options beyond that?
Speaker A
00:17:43
Also there you have an option to bring someone else, a support person with you into most appointments, if not all, either just to be there as support or to help you speak up for yourself.
Speaker A
00:17:54
Like they can be your advocate and it could be anyone from a significant other to friends or anyone that you feel comfortable knowing your history and knowing what's going on with you and just helping you Stand up for yourself.
Speaker A
00:18:08
Those are some big, you know, big things to remember when you go to the doctor.
Speaker B
00:18:13
You don't have to do it alone.
Speaker B
00:18:14
That, that's definitely, that's a, that's a big thing.
Speaker B
00:18:17
And it feels like it's very different in the year of our Lord 20, 25 than it was maybe 10 or 20 years ago where there is better representation in health care.
Speaker B
00:18:32
And now I'm saying that as someone who moved from a small town in Missouri to the west coast to Portland, where there's a lot more representation, there's a lot more openness and understanding.
Speaker B
00:18:44
I'm sure it's not that way everywhere, but I think across the board that healthcare is getting there.
Speaker B
00:18:53
The medical community is, they're understanding all of this stuff a little more than maybe they have in the past.
Speaker B
00:18:59
And so you can use that to, to your advantage and use these resources, make sure that you've got somebody with you like, like you, like you said, I think all that stuff is big.
Speaker B
00:19:08
I think looking around online, looking for actual resources, there are organizations like nafa, the national association to Advance Fat Acceptance.
Speaker B
00:19:17
Nafa, they've been around for a long, long, long time.
Speaker B
00:19:20
Tigers Osborne is over there now and she is the executive director and a board member.
Speaker B
00:19:28
She steers the ship over there and she's awesome.
Speaker B
00:19:31
They are definitely out to fight back against fat based discrimination.
Speaker B
00:19:38
For over 50 years, it says here on the website they've been working to make the world a better place for fat people through education, advocacy and support.
Speaker B
00:19:47
And they do all kinds of great work.
Speaker B
00:19:49
So you should definitely check out their website.
Speaker B
00:19:51
They have an entire like resources section.
Speaker B
00:19:54
It's nafa.org n a a f a dot org and so you can find, there's apps, there's even curriculum.
Speaker A
00:20:03
Yeah, they're definitely a big resource for all the different areas.
Speaker B
00:20:07
Absolutely.
Speaker B
00:20:08
There's so much there.
Speaker B
00:20:10
They have weight neutral health care providers, they have links to these different things that are, you know, community sourced lists.
Speaker B
00:20:18
They have all of these other things you can look at that really can help you out.
Speaker B
00:20:22
As you're trying to figure out how do I, you know, how do I navigate this, how do I deal with issues that I'm, that I'm dealing with every day because of my size.
Speaker B
00:20:30
It's definitely worth taking a look at.
Speaker A
00:20:32
Yeah, I also wanted to mention another one.
Speaker A
00:20:34
It's the association for Size Diversity and Healthcare.
Speaker A
00:20:39
They also have a directory for fat friendly healthcare providers and they're at a S D A h dot org we'll have a list of Resources in the show, notes that you all can check out and click on.
Speaker A
00:20:51
But yeah, they promote health at every size.
Speaker A
00:20:54
A weight inclusive health care approach.
Speaker A
00:20:56
So that's another spot to look for some health care providers that are fat friendly.
Speaker B
00:21:01
One other thing I want to throw in about NAFA is that Tigris osborne made the Time 100 health list last year.
Speaker B
00:21:09
It's the.
Speaker B
00:21:10
The Time 100 was Time magazine's most influential people of 20.
Speaker B
00:21:15
And it's a huge list with amazing people that are doing great things.
Speaker B
00:21:20
And I mean it runs a spectrum from artists to people in healthcare to sports, technology.
Speaker B
00:21:26
I mean, they've got icons.
Speaker B
00:21:28
I'm looking at this, I've seen like Mark Cuban is on the list, Sofia Coppola, Michael J.
Speaker B
00:21:33
Fox, Elliot Page.
Speaker B
00:21:34
Tons of people are on this list and Tigris is on that for the work that she's doing.
Speaker B
00:21:40
Yeah, yeah, really cool.
Speaker A
00:21:42
So like another area that can be difficult is around like family and friends.
Speaker A
00:21:48
Like family gatherings can be difficult sometimes when you have maybe that aunt or uncle or even a parental figure that seems to always want to bring up your weight and that can make it that you don't want to hang out with them, making sure that you're standing up for yourself.
Speaker A
00:22:04
You don't have to be, you know, rude or whatever, but just standing firm and what you are okay with.
Speaker A
00:22:10
I found a couple short little things that you can say to help set some boundaries.
Speaker A
00:22:15
You can say something like, I know that you care, but I'm not open to discussing my body.
Speaker A
00:22:20
I like that you're acknowledging that they're saying something about it but that you don't really want to discuss it.
Speaker A
00:22:26
So I think that's.
Speaker A
00:22:27
Boundaries are, they're tough sometimes, but they're definitely something that we all have to be okay setting.
Speaker B
00:22:33
Yeah, I know there have definitely been times for me in the past where I wish I would have had some kind of comeback or some kind of response to something and I just didn't.
Speaker B
00:22:44
And you know, it's those, those conversations can be difficult.
Speaker B
00:22:49
If you don't want to have them, you don't want to have them.
Speaker B
00:22:51
And you can just lay that out.
Speaker B
00:22:53
Don't be afraid to advocate for yourself.
Speaker B
00:22:55
That's really what it comes down to.
Speaker B
00:22:56
So set your boundaries and go from there.
Speaker A
00:23:00
Yeah, I like this one other one.
Speaker A
00:23:02
It says, I'd rather focus on things that bring us together, not my weight.
Speaker B
00:23:07
Nice, I like that.
Speaker A
00:23:08
So it can kind of help redirect the conversation to things that you, you know, that you've experienced together or Things that you want to do together and whatever that is and not centered around weight issues or your body.
Speaker A
00:23:22
So I'd rather focus on things that bring us together and not my weight.
Speaker B
00:23:26
Weight is still one of those things where, like size and all that, it's still something that.
Speaker B
00:23:30
Where people feel like they can just kind of jump in and give unsolicited advice, and it's.
Speaker B
00:23:37
I hope that changes, but until it does, it's nice to have some kind of.
Speaker B
00:23:42
Some ammo to go out there with, a way to respond, a way to deal with some of this stuff.
Speaker A
00:23:47
Yeah, there's all kinds of Facebook groups and influencers we've talked about in the past, and we'll probably talk about again that if you're still on social media or during your little bit of time on social media, make sure you're following and seeing what they're doing.
Speaker A
00:24:03
It kind of helps reinforce the other images or backlash that we're getting.
Speaker A
00:24:09
You know, focus on some of the great work that these fat advocates are doing and see what they're doing and get some.
Speaker A
00:24:15
Get energized or, you know, whatever by what they're doing and seeing what they're doing and knowing that you can do that kind of stuff, too.
Speaker A
00:24:22
So it's all kinds of people that we've talked about that I'm sure we can highlight again.
Speaker B
00:24:27
Yeah, yeah, I think it's all right.
Speaker B
00:24:31
It's an ongoing conversation.
Speaker B
00:24:33
I think there's a lot to say about it overall, and it's.
Speaker B
00:24:36
It's definitely something that we will have to revisit and I think kind of works into a lot of our conversations as we go along, so.
Speaker A
00:24:43
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker A
00:24:44
You talked about nafa.
Speaker A
00:24:47
They were a big one.
Speaker A
00:24:48
I wanted to talk about in the association for Size, Diversity and Health.
Speaker A
00:24:52
There's also some different laws.
Speaker A
00:24:55
I know that DEI is a big thing that's been in the news a lot, and I.
Speaker A
00:24:59
I just want to maybe touch on it a little bit.
Speaker A
00:25:02
You know, DEI is a very broad and inclusive thing that we're have fought for for a long time.
Speaker A
00:25:12
And so I know that maybe weight and that kind of stuff isn't at the forefront of the most recent conversations around dei, but it.
Speaker A
00:25:22
It does include that there are tons of laws out there that prohibit discrimination based on weight already in a lot of places.
Speaker A
00:25:30
So make sure, especially in the workplace or with your health care provider, make sure that you're documenting any of that kind of discrimination either in emails or some.
Speaker A
00:25:42
Some way, because there are protections out there still in most places.
Speaker A
00:25:46
Yeah, I Don't want to get too political about it.
Speaker A
00:25:50
I think most people know where we stand on those kinds of things, but.
Speaker B
00:25:54
Right.
Speaker A
00:25:55
I know a lot of companies are, are rolling back a lot of those DEI policies or they're rewording things.
Speaker A
00:26:02
So just make sure that you're aware of what's going on.
Speaker A
00:26:05
Most companies are still have policies and procedures around workplace harassment or discrimination.
Speaker A
00:26:12
So make sure, like I said, make sure that you're documenting.
Speaker A
00:26:14
Go bring up things to your HR or managers that is their job to prevent that kind of stuff or to guide you in how to handle those kinds of situations in your workplace.
Speaker A
00:26:25
But there are obviously lots of resources for workplace discrimination.
Speaker A
00:26:31
You know, like what is this workplace fairness.org there?
Speaker A
00:26:35
And information on workplace discrimination laws, including how weight bias intersects with disability and sex discrimination laws.
Speaker A
00:26:43
And then there's this.
Speaker A
00:26:44
I didn't look too in depth in this Harvard implicit bias test, but it does help individuals and employers assess unconscious bias towards fat people, which I thought was kind of interesting.
Speaker A
00:26:56
I didn't take the whole test.
Speaker A
00:26:57
I started it and I was like, okay, this is a little bit much for me right now.
Speaker B
00:27:01
Yeah, it's a lot, a lot of resources.
Speaker B
00:27:03
There's a lot of stuff out there.
Speaker B
00:27:04
We will include some of this in the show notes so that you can take a look through, kind of find some things that stand out to you and hopefully it helps.
Speaker A
00:27:12
Yeah, I mean, I don't know, did you have other big things you wanted to touch on?
Speaker B
00:27:19
I mean, not really next week I will, but this week just kind of us getting back to it and just kind of reconnecting and doing our thing and.
Speaker B
00:27:28
Yeah, we've got a, we've got a lot coming up and yeah, I've got a few other things to talk about but nothing I can talk about yet.
Speaker A
00:27:36
So just maybe final thoughts, how to take some action.
Speaker A
00:27:40
Make sure you're look at, look for resources and do some reading.
Speaker A
00:27:44
Push for policies that you're wanting.
Speaker A
00:27:47
You know, make sure that we're voting the way we want and need to to keep those weight based discriminations out of our workplace and whatever.
Speaker A
00:27:56
But make sure you're following us so that you can help support some fat people and.
Speaker B
00:28:02
Yes.
Speaker A
00:28:03
Well, thanks for starting back up again, Bruce.
Speaker A
00:28:05
I missed you.
Speaker B
00:28:06
Yes, I know, I know, It's.
Speaker B
00:28:08
I missed you too.
Speaker B
00:28:08
It's.
Speaker B
00:28:09
It's been a while.
Speaker B
00:28:09
We're back though.
Speaker B
00:28:11
We're just going to push forward.
Speaker B
00:28:12
We're going to do our best and you know, talk about the things that come up and go from there.
Speaker A
00:28:16
That's what we're here for.
Speaker B
00:28:17
And I will.
Speaker B
00:28:18
I actually do have some new and interesting beers.
Speaker B
00:28:23
Are they good?
Speaker B
00:28:24
I don't know.
Speaker B
00:28:25
Yeah, they're beers that I have not tried before.
Speaker B
00:28:28
Their beers I had not seen.
Speaker A
00:28:30
Yeah, I'm gonna be partnering with a shop just down the street here and getting some interesting beers.
Speaker A
00:28:36
He's excited to be able to help me out with that.
Speaker B
00:28:38
So I.
Speaker B
00:28:39
I think some of the.
Speaker A
00:28:40
Things that I have.
Speaker B
00:28:41
It's going to run the spectrum.
Speaker B
00:28:42
We'll see.
Speaker B
00:28:43
As far as, like, quality tastes.
Speaker A
00:28:45
I had the probably the greenest neony green beer during St.
Speaker A
00:28:49
Patrick's Day.
Speaker A
00:28:50
I'm gonna what the name of it was, but I was like, is this beer or is this, like, some weird chemical antifreeze that I'm drinking?
Speaker A
00:28:59
What is this?
Speaker B
00:28:59
Amazing.
Speaker B
00:29:00
All right, all right.
Speaker B
00:29:03
Well, thank you, Jody.
Speaker B
00:29:04
We'll be back again next week.
Speaker A
00:29:06
All right, bye, everyone.
Speaker B
00:29:07
Bye.
Speaker B
00:29:08
Bye.
Speaker B
00:29:08
Thanks for listening to Heavy Conversation.
Speaker B
00:29:11
Be sure to like and subscribe on itunes or wherever you get your podcast.
Speaker B
00:29:16
Podcast, podcast, podcast.
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