Finding a Happy Medium

Finding a Happy Medium FINAL: Okay, let's just drive we'll just dive in. We'll just dive we'll just dive in. Okay. We'll dive in. Okay. I think we're gonna dive in. Okay. Let's dive in. Welcome to Friends on Purpose. Where two friends talk about life, love, and finding purpose. Some extracurricular activities this past week. We have some stuff to talk about. Some crazy stuff. Well, it's not crazy to me. Okay. But it's crazy for you. Extraordinary. Yep. You want to tell everyone what happened? Yeah. So we we each booked an appointment with psychic mediums. two two different ones. Yep. Yep. And Wow. Well, I think it's a pre- You were wowed too. yeah. No. I know you're more experienced in this than me, but you d don't act like all like, yeah, this is just normal. Well it's like it's it's like, cool, you had sex for the first time. I've had sex twice. I remember my first time. Yeah. It's like, okay, so you done it once. Okay. So you're now you're an expert now? Okay. No, no, no. So yeah, I I I booked an appointment with the medium you've had, who you started off with. Yep. Krista. who's very pleasant human being. She's super rad. She's like, yeah, she was she was cool. yeah, so I guess I'll talk about mine and then you talk about yours. Yeah. I will I guess actually first I just wanna why why'd you go why'd you go seek it out? Why why all of a sudden? Why now? yeah, I think it was I think hearing your story and what it has done for you was really intriguing. And and you were you were scared. You were a little nervous ahead of it. I wasn't nervous. What did you feeling? I realize it I think the nervousness was old feelings because coming out on the other side, you know, after experiencing all the things that she talked about, it was surprisingly familiar to me. I like I like settled in instantly and it was like I know what we're doing. because of your church experience? Because of my church experience. So there's I I I honestly believe there were people in that group who have similar gifts to Krista and were operating them in them in some way, shape or form. you know, within the context or, you know, the the framework of religion. Yeah. and that at best had similar ha had a similar effect on me as as what Krista did. and at worst it made me very fearful and made me question how vulnerable I would want to be, you know, because there were times where it was used to scare you or to to control you or to to make you I don't know. You know, it was just used in an abusive way. So so I think that's why I was a little like, you know, is she gonna is she gonna be mean? Is she gonna look in look into my soul and see things and call me out on things that I'm not ready to face or I'm not, you know, I don't know. Like it's this is a stranger and she's peering into my into my spirit life. That feels very vulnerable. Totally. Yeah. You know, so but Well s so did you feel like at any point? Yeah, like it was doesn't it just feel super grounded in It was like it w what it was. I th yes. I think that was what one of the more remarkable things about it was was that it was very comforting. there are even points where she was communicating to me what my guides were you know they were challenging me in some ways but it was all from like a point of from a place of of love and like and like care. Yeah. So it, you know, it felt really good. It it felt it felt like therapy, honestly. Yeah. And she's very intuitive. You know, it's it you know, with all the psychic stuff, Aside, she just as a a human being, I can tell she's very she she can she listens very well. and and that's clearly a strength of hers. and I'm sure it it serves her very well when it comes to kind of channeling those those spirits. Yeah. Yeah. So for people who are unaware, just walk us through like how it went. Okay. So how it went. Okay, so From the very beginning, one of the first things she says is you do have an older male coming in with you and I'll address him in a second. Okay. There's already there's already a male presence here. already someone here ready to ready to roll. and then we're gonna channel today, which is bringing forward three spirit guides and I'll walk you through that landscape in a second. So I was like, okay, interesting. She said he's an older man. but she did introduce herself, s describing herself as a a psychic, a remote viewing medium and a channeler. So what I do is I project myself I'm an astral projector, you know, it's something I've done since I was a kid. but I project myself into what I call my backyard. And then your loved ones are in their backyard and I peek over the fence and I see what they're up to. So when I say your loved ones are in their backyard, they're in their afterlife. So what I'm able to do is I'm able to put myself in a neutral space that allows me to see what their afterlife looks like, who they're with, I can see what stage of reincarnation they're in, what stage of healing that they're in. And then lastly, of course I'm talking over the fence with them so I can give you messages. So the first half I think was like the psychic reading. And then the second half was introducing me to three of my spirit guides. that took Various forms. but I just ask that you keep an open mind around spirit guides 'cause they could be anything. They could be loved ones and ancestors from this life. They can also be loved ones and ancestors from past lives, you know, that you've had. Okay. They can also be past life versions of you. You know, you can actually have on your team souls that you have incarnated incarnated as in past lives, which I do get the sense like I got a green light for that for you. So I feel like you may have some Of that in your team. And usually when we have past life individuals on our spirit teams, it means that there's something we're meant to do in this life that they're like, please, God, don't fuck it up. Like, you know, it's like, let's just like get this done in this life and let's guide you through it. Okay. Spirit guides can also be angels. They could be demons, which demons are not bad. they could be interdimensional beings, which you do have a couple of those on your team. and they can also just be nature consciousness diva. but does a nature diva or primordial essence, that could be pure energetic. it just depends on what you do and what this life is about, but that comprises your team. Okay. do you have any questions for me before we get started? She first started off with, you know, she compared my situation, my place in life now. Yeah. she compares it to the movie Contact, with Jodie Foster. Yeah. which I thought was kind of cool because it's like Aliens, Yeah. and so she compared me to to Jody Foster's character who enters into this like machine that takes her through this wormhole, like into the unknown. Yeah. And I forgot about that movie. I just got that same image for you that you're being asked to step through this wormhole and your guides are asking you to trust them. Like you're being triggered as Faka can see that. Like there's a lot that's triggering you. She described me as someone who likes predictability and control. in parts of your life. Tends to avoid conflict. And there's certain things that are happening that are outside of your control that you're not thrilled about. But they're like, just get in the fucking sphere and let's go through the the the wormhole. We're going together. We're gonna get weird. Well they she nailed you. Yeah, okay. And this was like before I even said like four words, you know? Yeah. So she's like a fire hose, she's just Yes a stream of information. and I loved it. It was a lot to take in, so I was really glad I got the recording afterwards because I've I've since listened to it maybe three or four times. it's like the coolest podcast ever. It's your own it's your own podcast. Yeah. Yeah. Like it's almost like this this message that they're like, you need to get used to this new this new thing that's happening. your spirit gods are around you and they're asking you something different of yourself. There's something else that's meant to there's something bigger that you're meant for. But this is like I said, they keep showing me that wormhole. This is something you're just gonna have to trust them. And honestly, for the first time, trust your intuition and your gut through that kind of became a theme throughout the whole thing was just like learning to trust myself, accept uncertainty, stop avoiding uncomfortable situations was is kind of a theme throughout. She's like, so what is this transition? I was like, Well, I did just end my life with church and Christianity, and I have deconstructed entirely. and I'm still experiencing kind of the repercussions of that. which is why, you know, I'm here because I yeah, I want to know more about this crazy world. You're also like deconstructing parts of yourself that just simply accepted things for what they were. And you never found yourself, you were never allowed emotional autonomy, you were never allowed to daydream to to even trust your mind. She talked about growing up believing that God knows every thought you have, and how that can interfere with your ability to trust your own mind. They say God is always in your thoughts, He can hear what you're thinking, and so it you remove emotional and thought autonomy from children, you know, because then they can't trust themselves because someone else is always in there. And so one of the things that I see that you are coming into is you can even trust yourself. you know, and there's parts of you that feel completely disconnected from that human and from that inner child. I was never allowed. I was never allowed to think for myself. and you know, never allowed to daydream or, you know, even trust my own mind. And I think, you know, I I'd certain that sounds maybe a a little more extreme than what it actually was, but there are definitely real boundaries and I think I'm still suffering from that. Yeah, well it was your entire framework for Yeah, yeah. So long Yeah, so there's some of that I've some of that is still directing me and it's been a it's been something I haven't actually considered. So that was kinda cool. Like, okay, I'm already starting to think differently with this session, you know, like this is already moving me in a new direction. We're going to get So we moved on to deceased loved ones. So the older man that was waiting, she said was my paternal grandfather. Were you close with him? How did you know it was him? I didn't. She said it was my paternal grandfather. How did she know it was him? I don't know. She just said it was. Okay. I'm gonna bring this man forward. So this would be your paternal grandfather coming through. All right, sir. Your grandfather's asking you to look deeper into your lineage. He's like, he sees you searching. He's with his own father on the other side. That's what I'm seeing. How did you know? How how were you like, yeah, I think that is my grandfather? Like I know she said it was, but at what point were you like, well, that's probably him? What the real the the real thing, that really kind of sold it for me was that there was another Male presence trying to get in. There also seems to be like an uncle. There's someone who came through as well who is in your family who died young, who would have been like your age now, but maybe you were younger when they passed away. But he's there with him as well, and he came through too. but he's kind of like a rebel. Like he's he's got some some some wild shit that he wants to say. I'm gonna give him a second. I didn't know you had it. deceased uncle. Yeah. Yeah. And she portrayed him as like energetic and rebellious. which to me, it was like from what I gather of him, he he wasn't, I don't think energetic is the right word. And rebellious, I think maybe in the fact that he was gay at a time where it was not acceptable. Yeah. You know? and and I mean maybe he wasn't energetic around your family. Well that's what I'm wondering. so this actually the way she describes him makes me want to go back and talk to my dad and talk to my aunt. what was what was my uncle like? What was your brother like? I wanna know where this is all coming from. your uncle. He's just like I am like he just like knocked your grandfather out of the way. first thing first is Your grandfather is actually visiting your uncle in his afterlife. So did he die before your grandfather died? Yes. Okay. Because your uncle is like it's funny and he just all right, stop it. Like he's it he's a touchy feely, you know, like being touched by spirit. but he's like he immediately went to grab my shoulder. But she described as working on old cars, like in including an e an edsel, which is like like an old timey station wagon. and suggested that he wished he'd been more involved in my life. but it felt like you could have had you someone in your life that you blew off energy with or like processed things that you couldn't talk to your dad about with. And your uncle, the first thing he's saying, he's I wish I would have been that guy to you, bud. He calls you bud. He's just like, I wish would have been that person for you. It's like, that's kinda sweet. That's sweet. What I was thinking about is like I never really had beyond my my dad, I never really had a male mentor. Yeah. and just thinking about that was like, I guess I did kind of miss out on that that kind of thing. the the weird thing though is she described my uncle's hands as being big, and that's how I knew it was him. He's coming through So he's got he's got bigger hands, he's he's more str he's strong built, but he's got big hands and he's like almost wishes that he was a part of your life in a bigger way, so that you would have had someone to give you like guy advice. Because that's like one of the few things I know about him. Because as a a boy, a twelve year old, I wanted to learn how to play the piano. So I inherited his piano. He could spin like over eight keys, so a full octave. Yeah. and then would be so heavy handed on the piano. And maybe this is the energetic part. Like I I don't know. I I've never heard him play, right? But he's so heavy handed that he'd he'd broken the strings before. So you that's one of the only things you knew about him. you and your uncle, he died young. Wow. Well, yeah, well, he must have been showing her. Right, exactly. So those are all things she said unprompted. My uncle, he died young. He has big hands. And just like that is that is exactly What did that make you feel? I was I was I was kind of baffled, but at the same time, it's like This feels right. This feels normal, it was it was crazy. Yeah. Right? I mean, you look back and you're like, What? Yeah. How would she know that? even even if she listened to our podcast, you know, I've said a lot. I've never talked about my uncle. That is not in any any of my social media. That is not that's not something you can just learn about. I didn't even know it about you. Right. Right. I had I had no idea what a gay I had no idea gay uncle first of all. Gay uncle. He died during the AIDS epidemic, you know. He it it was it was tragic. Yeah. And and somehow she clued into that. well he showed up for you. Yeah. Yeah. He wanted to my grandpa. Yeah. Yeah. So I was able to she's like, is there anything you want to say to them and I I I basically just said, my grandfather was expressing some regret that he wasn't more involved in my life. Alright. So any questions for your grandfather? Because your uncle's just like I'm ready now. Like he's he's like elbowing his way in. I don't know about questions, but I I regret having dropped off the map is kind of how I feel with my relationship with him. And again, it was it was cordial. It was, you know, my grandfather lives in Mississippi. I see him maybe once a year during my childhood. And then it was just I got married and I, you know, I stopped seeing him, corresponding with him, and I regret that and I'm sorry. And wish I took the time to to know him more and to Yeah. Just to to get to know him. a as much as the past means to me, I th I think that's one of my my regrets with that relationship is is not taking advantage of it as an adult. And I don't know if you can pass that along to him. He hears you and he he appreciates it and he also lets you know that he set the scene too. Like there was already a disconnect even before you got here, like he was saying before. And I I wouldn't say that we like intentionally wrote him out of our lives, but we we were discouraged from visiting outside family. Like that that was not to take priority for anything. And so once I got married I got into a rhythm with this Colt. And you know, I feel bad about not having stayed in contact with him. I think there's a lot about him I wish I knew. there's with what little contact I've had with my my aunt, she's talked about just a few things about my grandpa. I was like, damn, like I wish I had Well now you can continue your relationship with him. Right, right. Which is the crazy part. Like in in this book Signs by Laurelyn Jackson. She's talking about how people actually cultivate these relationships like grow in their relationships with these people even after they die. through through signs and synchronicities and things. So it's like this is interesting. So yeah. I just don't know how your mind isn't blown. You seem so chill about it all. Well, like I said, this is I experienced this kind of stuff throughout my whole life. But did it ever feel this like it sounds like what you felt before was like amazing, but also tinged with some like fear or like motivation to like control your behavior. I think it was hit or miss. I think it was hit or miss. And it really had a lot to do with who you were talking to, My my mother in law, I feel has has these kinds of gifts. and and she's she was always able to speak to me in ways that felt very deep and and you know had similar vibes as as Krista. So that was the first half, the psychic reading. then she introduced me to my spirit guides. I'm gonna start with a past life coming through. if you want if you're open to that. Yeah, absolutely. So this isn't an ancestor, this is somebody from the past who I am now reincarnated as me. You know, I lived his life and now I'm living this life. Okay. So his name's Josiah. Josiah came overseas. He was like, I wasn't on the first boat. I was on the second. to America. interesting. He He's the printmaker. and it's funny because it's like she's on the phone with somebody. Yes. Remember I described that to you? Remember when it's like she's so she's kinda it's like she's like wait, wait, and then she's like Yeah, and she's like this is where the printing comes in, is what she said. She's like he's he's he was a printmaker. All right. So he what he started out younger as a people who helped other people come out to the Americas. but you come from a family of they keep saying haberdashers. So people who make hats and and and clothing, certainly and leather work and and he eventually saved his money to bring his family. he came over with a printing press eventually. Like his family he saved up enough money going back and forth to help as a ship mate, ship hand. and he ended up in New England. And according to her, Josiah became involved in in printing clandestine political materials. He started immediately working for people he didn't want to work for. It's almost like He wanted to start doing, being a part of journalism or printing out things for local government or local churches. But instead, there seemed to be an uprising happening during the time that he was out there and everyone was like, yo, fuck you, like, you know, we're we're gonna be meeting and like having secret meetings, we're gonna be you know, pushing back against government, we're gonna be fighting against the church and for autonomy, independence. And so what he ended up doing was using his printing press for for secret meetings and for cland he calls it clandestine. And it w he was kind of thrust into it, like he didn't have much choice. and so he's making these leaflets and and notices for secret meetings, during this this revolutionary you know, the American Revolution. But he also like got swept up And things he didn't want to be involved in, he just wanted a neutral life. These circumstances of life repeatedly forced him to like take a stand. and and and Krista said that, you know, that was a lesson that he was bringing to me. I feel like the printing press is just a byproduct. He's like, hey, I think this is cool, and you should think this is cool too. It's completely happenstance. It has nothing to do with like what you're meant to do around it. You're just meant to enjoy it because he loved it. He's coming through because you can't be neutral in this life. You can't toe the line. You can't play it safe. You have to like put your stake down and say, This is where I stand. I'm not budging. I'm calling I'm calling my own shots now and this is how I feel. And it doesn't matter if you change how you feel every year. you just can't stay neutral. And that's why he's on your spirit team right now because you're like he was like you've always been you've always been the one to be like the diplomatic or like or toe the not you know toe the line but not like you know rock the boat. And he's like, you cannot do that in this life. And so he's gonna be like your boat rocker. Like he's like I'll throw he's like I'll put you on the path To stormy weather because you're meant to feel something and push back and have boundaries around stuff. So he's very clear on that. But there's no neutral ground that you can take anymore. And that's your purpose in this life, and it's the lesson you're meant to learn. That's great for someone who hates conflict. Right. And it was interesting because because I've been feeling all that. You know? It was just kind of confirmations like, yeah, okay. And also I feel ready. I feel like I'm coming out of something and I'm becoming more my person, my own person. And so it's like, yeah, I can do that. The the next guide was a woman named Fran. she knew me as a young child. She described her as like this kind, nurturing woman. She gives me a little bit of an Italian grandma feel, but it's more of like I know that she didn't make Italian food, so just more of the vibe, but very caring. She's one of your spirit guides. And she's leaving. she may have been a teacher or family friend or community member. I nobody came to mind. maybe this one older woman from our original church in Massachusetts. but apparently she's been a part of my spiritual team for years, but was preparing to move on because I was entering because I'm entering this new stage and I don't need that nurturing spirit anymore. She's one of the ones leading by June because you don't need nurturing. You need emboldening. And she's like, You don't need me anymore. And so she's coming through to just let you know that she's like gonna be leaving your team. Probably she just gave me April twenty fifth, which is very specific. Yeah. So I just put that in my calendar and be be on the lookout. she also said that I have currently forty two spirit guides. but that number will increase to seventy. By July next year. It's a big crowd. Right. So there's a this big changing of the guard thing. there seems to be some kind of Nordic, like Viking influence in your in your ancestry. But there's like a man who's carving a sigil, like a a protection into an ash tree, and he works very heavily with them. So I would look at the correspondence of what an ash tree is. he's no longer human anymore. He's more of like nature personified, like nature consciousness. but he identifies with the fact that you are either meant to be the caretaker or the what is the word steward? Described him as an ancestral figure who had become a form of nature consciousness. So that's like a different kind of being. So so not a human. Or not not this time around. she suggested that I might eventually be involved in some sort of land stewardship, preserving certain tree species, particularly the ash. but apparently there's something around preservation and conservation that I'm meant to step into. Wow. Something between me, the correspondence, like that has to do with an ash tree. So I have no idea. And said that was gonna be a devel developing this summer and will be continuing for the next twenty years. So Twenty years? Whoa, you got a lot of work to do. I mean you know that's a lot. So like, who knows? Like Wow the the the Fran and that that spirit guide was just like, Okay, you know, that's cool. I'm not really sure what to do with it, but it sounds like I just need to wait and see what happens. And then the final thing, she as she, you know, we kind of were winding down, she's like, Do you have any questions? Anything at all? You know, it doesn't have to be related to this. And so I asked her if she could see like any past life connections between me and Emily. because I always thought we've we've had connections. she said, This is your third life together, and this is the first life where we have actually connected. she said the f one one of those where she said, Okay, so Emily in a past life was Josiah's older sister. whoa. yeah, it's so it's the Josiah life. she wasn't your wife in that life though. She was either a mother or an older sister who got left behind. I feel like it's an older sister who raised him. Yeah. Yeah. A woman named Laurel. And he when he sailed to America, Laurel s remained behind. She had a kid or was married or something. So she she played it safe back in Britain. You guys have like intersected in lives and then you've like parted ways. I feel like that was like maybe two this is your third life together and this is the first life where you guys have actually connected and what that is, and it feels multifaceted. Don't get freaked out by the sister thing. It's not gross. Like it it happens with everyone. Is something that you guys are meant to complete in this life. Then she described another life around the Mediterranean. She said possibly Greece or Turkey, where Emily and I had been childhood friends and young sweethearts. But in that life, she said, we were separated when I was taken away for for war, for military training. Wow. Around like age twelve. And there's always been like this recurring theme of separation, particularly across water. It feels in this life your wife feels like decades wiser. It feels like you're helping her navigate a lot of things, but it almost feels like she's lived like two lives before you. Yeah. You know, it's almost like there's been a couple different realities that she's had before you guys got together. She definitely she's the smarter of the two. She's I would say she's the wiser, you know, less emotional though I don't know if that's the right way of saying that. yeah, 'cause I feel like when she needs to be held, she needs to be held. Yeah. Like it's it's that where it's like she won't ask a lot of people for that help. But when she needs it, like you're that person for her. You're that safe port. Yeah. For sure. Yeah. That's beautiful. Well and she asked me, is there any, you know, any connection, is any significance of water in your relationship now? And I told her Not that I'm aware of, except that I'm like a big ocean lover. whenever we go to the ocean, it's like I want to this this is home to me. And Emily, it's like no, I I want the mountains, you know. And it's kinda and that was kind of reminiscent of like our past lives, you know? Yeah. I'm the one who goes off to sea, she's the one who stays behind on land. so apparently that's that's come through with us in this life. Yeah. So Well that just confirms everything you've ever thought about you and Emily. Yeah. Yeah. she said, Your job is to experience each other. Like that's what your your goal is in this life. And and she said, you know, keep it simple. Don't don't try to do anything crazy. You know, and whatever you This was funny. She said she encouraged us to prioritize our relationship, enjoy everyday experiences, share responsibilities. But don't don't fall into gender roles is the biggest thing that your guides are saying is that's that's what gets you in trouble. Yeah. Which we have a whole episode on, right? Yeah. And and we've done successfully. So that that felt pretty good. Wow. Yeah. And she asked about dreams. She's like, what are these dreams you're having? And and and She just asked that unprompted? Yeah. She's like, there's something about dreams. What's going on with dreams? Talk to me about these dreams that I keep seeing. be for you. because that feels like the heart of this reading. Like all this other social stuff is like a periphery. And my mind went blank, like, like I dreamed ever. You know? But what I did tell her was that What I did tell her was that you and I because she knows you is like you and I are experimenting with dreams. But you're being like directed by something outside of you right now. And what is that for you? We read a study where it was scientifically proven that you can telepathically communicate through dreams. She's like, yeah, and she's like, yeah, you know, yeah, of course. She's like, Yeah, I wrote that study. Yeah. And so so she told me a little bit about the telepathy tapes that there's this place called the Hill. Have started them? I have. I have. So I'm I'm so I'm gonna learn a little bit about. I think it's I think it's crazy. I know, I know. Okay. We'll talk about it less than In the best way. I say crazy, but I mean that in a very positive way. I know. it's very encouraging is Well, I need you to f wrap it up because my thing has dreams too. So my the thing I have to talk about. my god, okay, yeah. I'm almost done. So yeah, she said also the other thing I was gonna say is if you and Elaine, I would give it another couple weeks, but if you guys can't get there, we could do a session, the three of us, and I could train you guys to get closer to your outcome and what you want to do. there's something I do where I take people through an active visualization and I would I do it for groups here in Asheville. but I would be able to train you guys to go to Have you ever heard of the telepathy tapes? Yes. Yep. Okay, great. Do you ever do you ever listen where they're talking about the hill? Basically, she said, Hey, I can help you in Elaine, book a session with me and I'll and I'll help you h with some visual visualization exercises that she thought would really help steer us in the right direction in trying to communicate our word. So we're gonna do that. Yeah, we are. Whoa. She just knew that you had there was she was like, Tell me about these dreams. Yeah. That's really funny because one time w when I first met Krista, we were at a mutual friend's house and she just kind of like casually walked by our mutual friend whose house it was and we were having this big party there. And she was like, Weird, what's with the Turkish men in the basement? And our mutual friend was like, What? I don't know. And she was like, Hmm. But it was she like Just trying it on for size. Yeah. She's like, what? She's like, what's with these dreams? She just like knows stuff. I think it's so it's so wild. It's so cool. It must be exhausting. Well, I'm sure you figure out how to live with it, but like, yeah, it makes me think like, okay, I think I have some of these things. I think there's something real about this dream stuff. And it's already benefiting me in my own personal life, you know, like just Processing my own subconscious, right? just through therapy. but I think there's more to it than that, you know? So I'm kind of excited. I'm excited about that. That's why we're doing this whole season. So tell me about yours. Tell me about yours. I know I was long-winded and I always always am, so I'm gonna have to cut this down, but take your time. Hey friends. If you're enjoying the show, the best way to support it is by leaving a quick rating and review. It helps more people discover friends on purpose, and we're always happy to make new friends. If you've already done so, that's awesome. You're helping more future friends find the show. okay. So I, as you know, had, a couple of sessions with Krista like a year plus ago. Yeah. And then I spent the past year being like, Was that real? Like, did that really happen? Yeah. And I've been feeling really, really, really disconnected from my grandma, who was really kind of the reason that I like went down this journey. Yeah. So I've been listening to this podcast called a s called A Psychic Story. And it's this woman named Nicole Bigley. And she I I was just like I guess I was looking for other like I know my experience with Krista was real. I think she's great. But like the last time I met with Krista, she kind of was like, Look, you have this in you. You can develop this. You don't need me. Which I think is incredible. I think it's so cool. Yeah, I want to talk about that though, because like she I think because I was hearing that in the the book signs with Laurelyn Jackson. Yeah. It's like we all have this ability to commune with our spirits. We we're not supposed to need a medium psychics. Right. which is cool. But also there's something very meaningful or there's something extra when you're sharing it with with a with a medium. Yeah, someone's bearing witness to it. Right. And and adding some validity to it maybe, but I don't know. It's Yeah, but once you develop your once you develop these things on your own. Yeah. It's and it's not just about the signs, but that that's a whole other thing. So the last time I met with Krista, she was kind of like, I Krista specialize in like the divine feminine. witchcraft, all the stuff. She's like, Do you if you want to learn more if you want to hone your psychic skills in that way, let me know. But if you want to go down this other path, like I was, you know, like looking at like Eastern religion. It's like all different paths to get to the same thing, which is just like more, you know, clarity of mind, whatever. She was like, do that. So I just really appreciated that she was like, here's what I can offer you. If you like it, take it. If not, no problem. You can find it on your own. No big deal. I've given you kind of like the start you need. So anyway, over the past year, I just haven't well, A, I like kind of fell off and wasn't meditating that much. And I just felt a little like overwhelmed by work or whatever. But mostly again, here we are, like me feeling driven by like wanting to connect with my grandma. So I'm gonna tell you the headlines first because I haven't even told you this update yet. But so I meet with this woman, Nicole, and I'll tell you about what she told me. tell you about what she told me. I kept mentioning I was like, well, there's a loved one that I'm like particularly missing a connection with right now and she was like, She's like, Well my grandma just like brought someone in Is is it your grandma? And I was like That's what you were looking for, right? You Yeah, I was my grandma. I didn't want to tell her who it was. Yeah. Yeah. But she was like, is it your grandma? And I was like, Yes. And she was just like she was like, She, the reason you're missing her so much is because that's how she's trying to connect with you. She's like, She can't come to you in other ways because you're too tired. She said my spir all my spirit guides when they show her my daily life they just are like, it's a day and another day and a day. It's like I'm in this like I'm and I have been just feeling so overwhelmed by like work and my routine and whatever and she was like, sh you can't sh nobody can break through right now because you're so tired and you're so exhausted. So she's like, but your grandma's here and when you I I was like, I have been like I've just been overwhelmed with missing her. And she was like, That's her. Like when you all of a sudden feel like you miss her, that's a way that she's showing you. Okay. So so she's like, my God, this is so crazy. So she goes she goes, she's showing me this picture. It's it's like she's like I it looks big to me, but it's probably not that big but she's showing me this picture. I'm trying to pull it up right now so I can show you. She was like, she it's like of her and she has a green she has a green like shirt on. And I was like, Yeah, I know what picture that is and she was like, Okay, sit with that picture. And meditate or light a candle. She's showing me just sit with her and you'll work on your connection with her. Eric. I don't I like so I was like I was like a little crying, whatever, and I told my partner about it, and I was just like, and like I'm gonna like try and work on connecting with Graham more. Twenty-four hours later, we're away this weekend, and I opened my email, and my uncle was like, hey, cleaning out papa's computer. Now both my grandparents have been dead for t ten years now. Yeah. Cleaning out papa's computer thought you might want to have this. my god. He just friggin' emails me a picture of my Graham and me in a green shirt. That's crazy. I I I don't talk to my uncle. My uncle Joe and I are not we don't t like and it just showed up in my email after I've been like I've missing I'm not seeing signs from Graham, whatever. It was like such a friggin' cosmic, like You can't orchestrate and I have this So it's obviously all She was like And that I went to this medium specifically because I was like, if my gram doesn't come through, I'm gonna have I'm gonna be like, is this unreal anyway? Yeah. Yeah. Right. And then it was just like So she also told me, so the two like the other two highlights were just that one of my sp so s Nicole like Krista, she kind of specializes in specific spirit guides. yeah, she had a few new ones, right? Yeah, so she says that specifically Yeah, like I didn't Krista didn't really explain that like sh she didn't really share these ones with me and different people like you were new to. I have a a big spirit team. And so you know, you can't like speak to everyone. But she said that I have an archangel, Gabriel. And Gabriel's here on my spirit team specifically to help me communicate effectively the like this thing I'm building. And she's like, you haven't started building it yet, but when you do, Gabriel is here to like help you do whatever you're supposed to be doing and to greater impact. I feel like she she was like, she was like, I'm not trying to say like some people are more special than others. But she's like, but not everyone has an archangel to their team. And I was like, okay. Mary had Gabriel. Jesus had Gabriel. It's no big deal. It's just no big deal. It's no big deal. It's just Gabriel's on my team. it felt cool. I was like, Whoa, but here's th the one that felt really I was like, I'm you know, cause like angels to me. I i I don't have the same historical or emotional connection. And the I think Krista would say, there's all there's angels, there's demons, there's, there's there's interdimensional beings, there's all sorts of things out there. So Nicole's thing is angels and ascendant masters. So examples of an ascendant master is someone who has walked an earthly life and like now. It's ascended and is able to share their gifts. So Jesus, Gandhi, Mother Teresa. but like saints kind of thing? I guess, or just like I I mean, guess who my ascendant master is? Merlin. The wizard. King Arthur's cord, sword in the stone, MF and Merlin. So she was like she was like I know. She well and I was I was kind of like, what cool? She was like, Do you have a connection with Merlin? And I like, I mean Apparently in the Yeah, like only in the way that like he's a celebrity. So he's here to teach me about like the map. magic and manifesting, like how do we do? So she's like, you have a long ancient tradition of alchemy and manifesting. And she's like, just so you know both of both of these and most of your spirit team is telling me that you have more propensity for mediumship than than the average bear. And if it she's like, I'm not telling you to like quit your job and like become a medium, but just so you know these are skills that you can develop. And that's also something Krista told me. So the the crazy thing, she was like, and they're telling me that you're clairsentient. do you know what that means? And I was like, Not really. She's like, Well, you'll be you'll feel things when like the spirit is kind of aware, you know, making aware in your body. And I shit you not. I was getting chills up and down my spine. And she was like, like right now, are you getting chills? And I was like, Yes. And she was like, I know that because sometimes the way your spirit team will communicate with me is like they'll show me the feeling you're having. And I was like I was having like real not just full body chills, but like chills going up and down the bat like mine and she was like, just look out for those. Like when you get chills and you're not cold, like pay attention to that. So I was like telling her how I had felt I felt like I have these I have some ability and like dreams were really important. It's how I connected with my Graham. This was like right at the end of my session with her. And I was like, but like my dreams I I haven't been feeling very connected in my dreams. And similar, like Krista, she's it's like kind of like she's on the phone. She was like, She was like, Your spirit team is kind of laughing and saying, Are you having a hard time finding the word? What? And I was like, I was like The word? Yeah. I was like, I had ch I got chills everywhere. And I was like, I was like, what? I was like, they're laughing. And she was like, yeah. She was like, do you know what that means? Do you know what that means? Does that mean anything to you? And I was like, Yeah. yeah. I was like, my friend and I are trying to like connect in our dreams. And like, he has a word that he's trying to communicate to me. And just like she was kind of like, were they laughing at us? I was like, are they? well it's like they know the word, obviously, and they're just like are you having a hard time? Like getting this picture from my grandma, it's like w she could have said anything and it wouldn't have made sense. But s like that is And she was just like, she was like, she's She could have listened to the podcast, but it's deep into our podcast. Good point. That's a good point. It's deep in our podcast though. Like she would have to. No, I'll I'll I'll side with I'll s I'll side with any skeptic if they want that is out there. So that's true. Yeah. Sure. If you want to pick that one apart. I I was just like I don't. I don't think thanks. I don't think she's listening to our podcast. I don't And I like I don't think I don't think anyone's listening to I don't think anyone is listening to her butt. Sorry. Meg, thank you so much. Meg Henschel, we appreciate your continued listening. We we appreciate it, Meg. Thank you. Emily, sometimes we get it. You listen to Eric enough. My partner is I don't think sh she's listened in months. We don't we don't judge them for that. No no, no, no, no. In fact, it's probably better you don't listen if you don't want to. That's right. We don't want you to do us any favors. So anyway, I don't think she's listening, but but good point that is out there. but but yeah, and I guess I refuse I refuse to believe that. And I don't think she's that's me as as well. That would be an insane ruse, you know, for her to have to like for think about this. For every client, she'd have to like scour the internet. Like no way. No way. So I think we should book a sesh. with Krista and okay yeah all right so anyway that's all my that's like that's that on that about my psychic experience. It was awesome. It was amazing. I this the email follow up with a picture of my grandma felt just too much to like i explain away. I it just was like a g it was like a gift dropped into my lap and I was like so yeah so I guess what I just would say is like Just like anything good in your life, the placebo effect matters. And so me believing it, it's like my heart feels lighter. The instructions from my spirit guide are to incorporate some creativity into my life a little more. don't focus so much on the routine. how the heck could that be bad? They're not like go buy ten thousand dollars worth of lotto tickets. You know, like or, you know, well, you need to book another session if you really if you if if you need to yeah. So it's not like No. And that's how I felt. It's just like I felt cared for. I felt loved. I felt there was no fear in any of it. And I came out with a a a a positive outlook on what's ahead, you know? Like especially in places that have made me feel nervous or uncomfortable. It's like, I can do this, you know? Well and that you're not alone. And then I'm not alone, yeah. And that like something I think that's what I mean, my gram said to Nicole was like, When you're when we're here on in our earthly bodies, like just living this life, it's very rare that you see the totality of another human. Right. But our loved ones or our guides or whoever, they see us first of all, like ego goes away. when we die, at least I believe. And so these beings are like these these souls are totally guided by love. For us, for you and that like those signs are so that you can remember how loved you are. Yeah. Like by someone who just has no other point to whether they're showing up for me in in in you know random signs un universe signs. Or, you know, what I was seeing is like this is gonna take me down a path. You know, this is gonna this is gonna make me want to connect with my father in a new way. This is gonna make me want to connect with my aunt in a new way. I need to know more about this and I can see how that can lead to another beautiful relationship. More love. Yeah, exactly. You know, exactly. So that's And that's what I've been looking for. It's like, okay, yeah, where like what am I doing? Like what if I'm if I'm trying this on, what what purpose is it taking? And if it's that, then I'm all for it. And I think overall it was a really positive, really Remarkable experience. So I I would Yeah. I wanna I wanna do it again. I wanna do I know we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna have a I know, I know. And it's like what if our spirit teams join up? That would be dope because I would love to join to interact with Merlin. Yeah. Should we splash down? We should splash down. I looking for one of those 365 creative prompt things or whatever to help me just I really struggle with creativity. You know this. Do you though? Like I I don't know that about it. I really like bound up. Because all of the ways that I find my creativity, like I don't struggle with creativity in the kitchen, but like my spirit guides were reflecting back to me. Right now, my cooking. I know that's what that's what they said. I well, grandma said I should like call her into the kitchen and just cook with her more. Which that's fine, but literally right now I I prep all my breakfast burritos a week ahead so that when I get up at five I can pop it in the oven. A little I'm like cooking for sustenance. It's like that's what I need more in my life is like actual structure. Yeah. Well, g have fun being creative in the kitchen 'cause I'm just like I like made lentil soup, but I made it so that I could have h hearty fiber and protein lunch for the week. Like I'm just on such a like conveyor belt right now. You know what creativity loves? Forced fun. Right. That's creativity. Don't plan this out. the three hundred and sixty things, no. What do I do? How do I just be more creative? Find something that you think is beautiful and recreate it. How are there instructions? What medium? any medium. You know what I really like doing when I was younger? I was really into Andy Goldsworthy, the nature artist. Okay. And would go for walks in the woods and try to create my own Andy Goldworthies esque. Whoa. That's cool. I've never seen And it just lives out there and it dies out there. That's cool. So go do that. Okay. I guess that's just the coolest idea you've ever had. Whoa. Look at this one. Whoa, he's so cool. I'm surprised you don't know about him. I guess I've seen this before, but I haven't I didn't know who I didn't know who it was. Yeah. Wow. I think he was kind of like he peaked in like maybe the nineties. Yeah, nineties. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Go for a nature walk and do that. Yeah. All right, great idea. I mean you know. Right. Okay. Well, I think you have plenty to to work with here. I guess the real question is should we do dreams next? We're definitely doing dreams next because we're gonna get help from Krista and then we're gonna rec reconvene and we're gonna talk about it and we're gonna make an episode. Yay. Okay. Alright. Talk to you later.