How to Stop Having Surface-Level Conversations

Do you talk to someone every day without knowing what matters most to them right now?

Jordan West explores how attention changes a conversation, beginning with Oprah Winfrey's Harvard address and the career turning point she described in Baltimore.

Jefferson Fisher contributes recognition and remembering names. Vanessa Van Edwards's Conversation Blueprint helps us think about depth. Alison Wood Brooks's TALK framework helps us make better conversational choices. Christopher Kerr's account adds a different perspective on attending to another person's experience.

The seven-day experiment: one deliberately attentive conversation a day. Ask a genuine follow-up, remember something worth returning to, and respect the depth the other person wants.

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SOURCES & FRAMEWORK CREDITS

Oprah Winfrey, Harvard commencement address:

https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2013/05/winfreys-commencement-address/

Oprah's Baltimore account:

https://achievement.org/video/oprah-winfrey-3/

Jefferson Fisher on The Diary of a CEO:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPVdK9v0CK8

Vanessa Van Edwards, Conversation Blueprint:

https://www.scienceofpeople.com/conversation/

Alison Wood Brooks, TALK:

https://www.talkstudios.com/talk-approach

Follow-up questions, Harvard Business School:

https://www.library.hbs.edu/working-knowledge/elements-of-meaningful-conversation-fewer-mirror-questions-more-follow-ups

Christopher Kerr on The Diary of a CEO:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlaSnROMqRY

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