KBLAAM-pl-20653

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Hey, the LA Talk fifteen eighty Yeah, we got jokes.
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We said. Our topic this morning is celibacy. So much
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to talk about this hour, and a lot of people
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are making the choice. And then on the other end
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of the spectrum, there's a group called in cells, which
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literally means involuntary celibate. We're being joined this morning by
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an American stand up comic. She's from New Orleans, USA.
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She's an actor, a singer, a writer, a host, and
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an entrepreneur. She's also a matchmaker now in her latest incarnation,
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Del Harrison. Welcome down and me.
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Thank you so much for having me with in cells.
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Involuntarily cells. So ain't nobody getting with them? I mean
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I need more more information.
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Oh okay, you're not up on the in cell movement.
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In cells there's a lot of young men, mostly young men.
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I think they're maybe some women, but in cell refers
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to the there's a group of young men, mostly online
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that are involuntarily celibate, and they're angry because they feel
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many of them I'm paraphrasing, but this is pretty much
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how they are seen as people angry at women because
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they feel that women owe them uh sex, love, companionship,
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and they're not getting it. So some of them are
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pretty and pretty misogynistic if you will.
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Well, they got to turn off the rap music first
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of all, okay, because a lot of that is is TTR.
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How to just want somebody for one thing and now
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you mad with me because you know, and and then
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happy First of all, that group that's not just young
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men too, I mean means some old men out here
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involuntarily celibate too.
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Yeah, yeah, well, you know right exactly. They call it. Well,
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this is from CNN, they say. The Anti Defamation League,
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which works to address hate and extremism, defines in cells
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as heterosexual men who blame women in society for their
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lack of romantic success. They're described as being largely misogynistic,
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self pitying, and they are considered dangerous according to the
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Anti Defamation League because of their anti woman views.
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And that's what I'm talking about, guys. Hi, y'all anti women.
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But then y'all need to lay down with us at
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the same time. And you know what, a lot of
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men be like that too, like they hate us. They
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in the comments talk about y'all l this. Y'all need
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to put some clothes on. Y'all just in that, but
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then at the same time you still want to be
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hell by us, and brother, you can't have it both ways.
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You can't be out here mad with your mama deflecting
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on me, and then I'm supposed to go over here
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and lay down with you, you know, And then the other
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half of y'all want to take people on days three
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times for thirty dollars, and then I need to go
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back home. What you do or you mad? Like who
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taught y'all how to court? That's really the bottom line.
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I mean, I don't know how many black men are
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part of the insult culture. It's generally more like associated
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with Miles. You say, yes, there are black men. I
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think it's generally more associated with white yeah, heterosexual men.
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But I do see what you're talking about in the manisphere.
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I made the mistake one day because I saw someone
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that I know that I thought was a friend talking
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on the man and it turned out to be a
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manisphere chat where they were just spending the whole time
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disparaging black women for wearing weaves and makeup when we
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should be working on our inner beauty and our natural
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our natural beauty or whatever. And I said, why are
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you policing women's hair and makeup, and then I you know,
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they started attacking me. You know, well you're divorced, so
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you're a failure and you know all this stuff. So
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so that anti time. Yeah, that's right. So what I'm
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getting at is that anti woman culture that you're talking about,
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even though in cells aren't generally black, that anti woman,
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that misogynist sort of undertone does exist in the black
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online spaces. I think among men more in the manisphere
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kind of energy.
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Well, I don't even know any Like when you first
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said in cells, I thought of three hundred thousand black
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men i'd have met.
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Part so they don't know it.
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I mean, no, they don't know it. They haven't now,
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but they didn't created the whole group, like because I
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just met a man. I just went on one of
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these like group runs one of these days. I met
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a fifty five year old black man and we're just,
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you know, just talking to him about like, you know,
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every man wants a good woman, right, And he was like,
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I'm fifty five, what would I want a good woman for?
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I got five different women. Well I was like, well,
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I was like brother, you know, immediately I thought he
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was like one of these like high functional autistic man.
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Because I'm like, every man wants a good woman buy him.
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He was like, well, I got five. I got a
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woman for this, I got a woman for that. But
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I was like, brother, you're not sleeping with all five
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of that. I mean what I want? What I want
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to leave? So that man is involuntary. He's been involuntarily
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celibate so long. This man can't think straight. He can't wait.
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Wait a minute, if he's got five different men, how
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is I mean women? How is he celibate?
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He because ain't nobody sleeping with no woman and sleeping
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with that retarded mindset? You know what I'm saying, Like
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this man, I mean I wish.
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They might be, but they might be. I mean there
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are there there are people that have a scarcity mentality
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that think that there aren't enough men, or people that
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think there aren't enough women, or that you know that
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they they might he might Is he rich?
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No?
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No?
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He mean is he hots? No? I'm talking about the
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rig hot or brilliant. Look he had to he had to,
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you know, got out of high school, started working at
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the trash truck company, got demoted from driving back to Janada.
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You know, what I'm saying and been out here with
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the chemicals method of his brain ever fits like he
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had you. Okay, yeah, I'm sorry, you know, because the
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thing is even my dog she started, or.
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Oh no, she started, she called it what it was.
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I got this. I know you got some cleanup to
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do right now, so I got well, I'll check back
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and would you after you do that. But I mean, look,
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here's the thing. We started talking about celibacy today. We said,
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you know, is it a punishment or is it? Is
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it a choice? Uh? And I think that when we
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talk about in cells, the Fahimas and the chat saying
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they're all white and male. There's also the minis for
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that has a Netflix movies that includes black man like
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Myron Gains. But I mean, and I know that this
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is a whole subculture. And I've also observed a lot
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of women, especially on Instagram, talking about what you're saying, Dell,
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which is that men want to have sex with us.
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You said you want them to hold us. I don't
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think it's really just whole. I think they want to
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have sex with women, but they want to spend all
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their time with men. They don't really like women. I
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don't know if this is a new phenomena or not.
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But the other side of that coin is more and
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more women and men, some men, but more and more
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women are choosing celibacy as a dating choice, and I
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would think that's the other side of the coin. We
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will look at all of that when we come forward.
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You're invited in if you've got something to say about it.
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Eight hundred nine twoh fifteen eighty, eight hundred and nine
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two fifteen eighty. I know that Dell Harrison has something
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to say about something she gets done dealing with that DS.
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It's KBLA doc fifteen eighty and you're waking up with
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Dell Harrison and her pup Happy Monday. Yes, we're off
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to a great start. So, Dell, you're a high profile person.
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You're a singer, you're an actor, you're a comic, you
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do stand up tory, do all of these things. You
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do these mixers for black singles over forty What is
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your personal choice? Are you celibate? Are you considering celibacy?
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Do you think it's growing in popularity? How does this
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topic relate to you?
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Yeah? I am celibates, you know, by choice, and it's
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because I feel like I want to be under the Covenant,
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and I do also feel like when you are a
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person that is on a mission, you know, like myself
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and a lot of people are. You know, when you
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have sex involved expectly quickly, then it's a distraction and
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it usually takes away from your purpose. And so as
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a Christian woman myself, I need to be able to
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hear from the Lord. That's why I'm just like, no,
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I'm gonna refrain at all times because you know, people
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and I feel like people get this confused. People like
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you know, I've talked to men and they feel like, oh,
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if you're celibate, you don't like sex. No, we like,
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say most most of the women I know we like
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sex even more than men like say, but we wanted
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with the right person. And a lot of times, you know,
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when you're when you're laying down too quickly as a
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lot of people want you to do, you know it's
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not the right person because sex, first of all, it
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clouds your visions, you know, and it claws up your hearing.
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People don't know that.
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Huh, yeah, it claus up your hearing.
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Yeah. Well, okay, So if you're a spiritual person like me, Okay,
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you need to be able to hear. And when you
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introduce sey, if it's not with the right person, you're
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going to be introducing a lot of like distraction. You're
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introducing a spirit. And so now where you would have
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been sitting community hearing from the father, that is closed
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up because you know, the male doesn't just have uh
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you know, reproductive equipment. It's actually a wand it controls us.
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You know, whatever he's feeling, you're gonna be feeling. Whatever
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he's doing, he's gonna be doing. And it it's good.
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It's that's krystonite, you know.
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So, wow, that's a lot. That's a lot.
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Yeah.
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Uh so you really think that is the magic stick?
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Well, it's meant to be the magic stick, you know,
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that's the thing. Is is meant That's how the Lord
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built it. It's meant to be the magic stick. That's
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why you have to have the right burn, you know
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what I'm saying. That's how the LRD built it like that,
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and that's probably why people are so angry they don't
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have a magic stick, you know what I'm saying. So,
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y'all under the curve out here, and.
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Oh now it's a current I'm saying, first it was
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a magic wand now it's a it's a item of.
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No. No. Some people I have not been hurted. Some
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people have not received the magic wine, and so they're angry,
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you know what I'm saying. And with his angry too, well.
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Yogi says celibacy is healthy. He says, I'm not an
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animal and I've never had a sexual disease. Protect your
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body and mind. Sex can kill you. Yeah, that's true.
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A lot of things can kill you. Cars can kill you.
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I mean, food can kill you. Alcohol can kill you.
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A lot of things can kill you if you don't
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handle with care. But Morris is also saying she's right
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about the power of sex. And look, I'm not judging
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you for your choice at all. I remember when I
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used to be on the Steve Harvey Morning Show and
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Shirley Strawberry went for a long period of celibacy because
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she was looking for a husband. And this, I know,
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the sort of born again virgin movement has gained a
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lot of traction, like a I don't know, maybe for
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the reasons you're saying. You know, they want to have clarity,
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or they want to erase their body, their body count
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and start over. I'm not sure, do you. Is it
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your impression that more and more people are making us choice.
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I think more and more people are making a choice
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because once you get and the thing is, I know
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men that are opting into celibacy too. It's not and
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these are attractive men. It's not that they can't get anyone.
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But when you're on a mission, when you're on purpose,
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like purpose requires you to have a certain level of
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self control. And when you have that self control, then
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you understand the value of not just going over here
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and giving it up over here, you know, all these
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different places because now you know, the purpose gets distorted.
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So I feel like people are opting in for that
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reason alone. It's like they're trying to get you know,
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getting to They're not just getting to the bag. They
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in the bag, and they understand white companionship, you know
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when it comes to like sex, because everybody know Howney
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the devil will send you the exact type you're looking for.
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You like them tall, He got them tall, wait around
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the corner, you like them short man? Oh man? Was
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that short man five? So I think you gotta you know,
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you have to have a certain level of self control.
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Because you need to get to the right partnership and
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you know there's nothing like you know, chemistry, be burning
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like crazy for the wrong person.
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So how do men react? Because I know you're not
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only have a dating sort of meet up and you've
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got a whole app for people to meet up, you
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do events, and I know that you yourself are looking
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for a life partner. How do they react when you say, oh,
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I'm celibate. Does that change your dating trajectory?
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Well, it changes it myself period. But it does help
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to warrant because some people need to lay down, Like
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you know, when you may meet these men, whether you
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meet them online or you need honey, A lot of
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these men need a hug. Last week, you get what
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I'm saying, sir, I cannot be out here resolving life problems.
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Okay.
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You know from the last thirteen women that rejected you,
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you have to go back in and figure out why
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you're not getting any hugs. And that's what the INN tells.
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Need to figure out what is it about you in
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particular where you're not huggible to a woman. But the
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thing about it too with me, it helps me to
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ward all the people that may not be a real afraid,
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and I've had a person that has offered me, uh,
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you know, to come come get in his bed. Then
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I was like, oh no, I'm on a life mission.
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And then we actually got closer for me telling him
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that I'm celibate, I need to you know, we actually
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became friends. But guess what, what's honest with me? He
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was like, listen, you we we're just only going to
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be able to be friends, okay, because my girlfriend got
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some work to do. No problem, because I will let
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her do all the work until I determined that, you know,
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maybe maybe we will grow closer one day and and
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the work will shift over here. But no, you know,
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I was I respected, you know what I'm saying, and
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that's put the expectations right. So we're you know, we're
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we're still in contact, but you know that it's clear
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out there. It's clear that he needs to go over
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here and you know, and and get get the work done.
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So he says, and I need to be over here
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with my promise.
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With your promise. The spooky sat behind the door, says
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Yogie Fish twenty nineteen. Once it's a year back, the
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gender war is officially over, just like the boss chick era.
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I'd be happy with both of those eras being over
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for sure, but I'm not sure that I believe that.
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He goes on to say, the overwhelming majority of men
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are not trying to get in a permanent relationship with
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women who have high body counts, and so that I
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guess that's an upside of being celibate. You would seem
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unless you did a lot of it, well as you
292
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had a prolific hoe era before you became to celebrate celibate.
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No, but what I'm talking about is with like with Spook,
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I agree with everything you say, except for the high
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body count, because unless she's seventeen and you just meeting her,
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the average person is going to have a high body
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count their eyes, unless somebody just got married when they
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was you know, right out of high school seventeen, they
299
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was together for forty years and then they just got
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a divorced or you know, or he died that other
301
00:18:12.839 --> 00:18:16.880
than that, when you go into relationships, said when you
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when you're going through relationships just thinking a person is
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the one, you could have said, Yeah, I.
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Have my own theories about that too, because I feel like,
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of course, you don't want to have body bags piled up.
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But I feel like men say that when they're not
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really into someone. If if Rihanna was liking you, you
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00:18:40.799 --> 00:18:43.799
wouldn't care what her body count was. If Beyonce was
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liking you, you wouldn't care what her body count. Well,
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I don't know. I'm not a man. Maybe I'm wrong?
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Am I right?
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Stop asking?
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Right? Right, right, right? But it's but that doesn't have
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anything to do with why you chose, why you yourself
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are choosing celibacy, not trying to slow down the body count.
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But also too, is I stopped counting okay because I
317
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do what I want to do out here? And then
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also too, is.
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The a man?
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You need to stop asking because that is a question
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that hurts you. It don't hurt the woman, it hurts you.
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She just moves right on, honey, to collect another one.
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And guess what you out here doing the same thing.
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Most of y'all got a double y'all, most of our
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body count is double what we got, and you worried
326
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about the body count. That is the wrong question, Like
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you need you need to stop asking that. But I
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do believe I do agree with Spoops about the you know,
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when he mentioned the gender ward, I want them to
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be over too, because that is what divides many people
331
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from getting together. Men are are you know if you
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like a video, one of the negative Mirron Games video,
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00:19:54.839 --> 00:19:57.039
which I would not let him claim that he is
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from the Black Rays, honey, I would. You know, if
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you like it one of those negative videos, A bunch
336
00:20:03.559 --> 00:20:06.119
of those negative videos come up, you respond to it,
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and that's wuld be on your timeline. And those are
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divisive things. So that's why you know you got a
339
00:20:12.039 --> 00:20:14.000
lot of these men. And then of course you have
340
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this very masculine hip hop music. I just went to
341
00:20:17.400 --> 00:20:20.119
this bar the other night, you know, thinking I was gonna.
342
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Hear some R and B.
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In every every song was this masculine song that was
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very masculine attracting, and all these men was in there.
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But the music was just like all I need her
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to do was SUNI and see and and I'm gonna
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just leave hold that.
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Son. I thought. We've got news driv against sports and
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and more. We're talking celibacy. You're invited in eight hundred
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nine two oh, fifteen eighty KBLA Talk, fifteen eighty, j
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BLA Talk fifteen eighty. We're talking celibacy today, Del Harrison
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is my guest. She's a comedian, she's a writer and actress,
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a singer, and a host. She also has an app
354
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called Cambaie, which will help you find your match, and
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she has chosen for herself celibacy. Celibacy our topic today
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this hour, and we were talking off the air too,
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of course you on the air, you were saying, men
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need to stop asking about body count. This is one
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of the areas where there's a complete double standard. You
360
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got a man like well Chamberlain, how many women did
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he say he was with ten thousand or something crazy
362
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like that, And so men go around bragging about it
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like it makes them somehow a conqueror or a you know,
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some kind of a I don't know, Romeo or something.
365
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But women are shamed for it. So it's not the same.
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It's it's it's you know, it's not the same in society.
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And we shamed for it because you know, we we
368
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we generally make better decisions about sleeping with people. So
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it does signify when a woman has a high body account.
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It does signify in the past she's been sleeping with
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people that didn't want her, or you know, she didn't
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want or there was something there because generally we do
373
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like to be with one man. But they are avoiding
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the fact that, you know, some of these men are
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slick out here and will tell you anything and will
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make you feel like, oh, y'all might be getting married,
377
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you know, in the morning, just give it up to
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night and in the morning he is dos.
379
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But I mean, we have to trick a man into
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like marrying us if he was gonna be ghosts anyway.
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I don't know. I feel like, I'm sure that's not
382
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why you're practicing celibacy. But to me, the era of
383
00:22:48.759 --> 00:22:51.920
playing games, I don't know. For me, it's just over.
384
00:22:52.119 --> 00:22:54.680
Either you're you're gonna do what you say or you're not.
385
00:22:55.599 --> 00:22:57.319
I don't want to do all that, not because I
386
00:22:57.400 --> 00:22:59.799
don't care, but because it doesn't work.
387
00:23:02.359 --> 00:23:04.839
No, And I agree with you. And that's the thing is,
388
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and that's why a lot of people are choosing it,
389
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because if you are gonna do what you say, you're
390
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gonna do what you say, regardless of the sac Because
391
00:23:12.640 --> 00:23:15.119
the thing about it, too is you can't even get
392
00:23:15.200 --> 00:23:18.200
to know, Like if you look at these marriage shows,
393
00:23:18.319 --> 00:23:24.240
dominique like married at first side, Fine, me too, me too.
394
00:23:24.400 --> 00:23:26.799
I am fascinated with the show. But all of the
395
00:23:26.920 --> 00:23:31.079
ones that flee together right away, they usually break up
396
00:23:31.240 --> 00:23:32.039
for some reason.
397
00:23:32.279 --> 00:23:35.240
Okay, fair, fair fair, But then you look at it.
398
00:23:35.559 --> 00:23:38.039
At my friend Shirley Strawberry, she was celibate for a
399
00:23:38.119 --> 00:23:41.480
couple of years, several years she finally found this man
400
00:23:41.599 --> 00:23:43.440
and married him, and he turned out to be a crook.
401
00:23:44.200 --> 00:23:48.799
So even the whole I do thing doesn't necessarily, you know,
402
00:23:49.039 --> 00:23:52.000
protect you. I don't know.
403
00:23:52.279 --> 00:23:54.640
The thing about it, too is your decision. See. The
404
00:23:54.720 --> 00:23:57.400
thing about it too is you cannot be waiting in
405
00:23:57.559 --> 00:24:01.200
desperation now, like when you're waiting for the lawyer to
406
00:24:01.279 --> 00:24:04.559
sing you your wife or yourself, you know, your husband
407
00:24:04.640 --> 00:24:07.799
to find you. You can't be waiting in deceration, so
408
00:24:07.920 --> 00:24:10.759
you marry anything. There are still signs like you know
409
00:24:11.000 --> 00:24:14.279
that that you can look for and still lives that
410
00:24:14.359 --> 00:24:17.359
people call because I'm sure he wasn't up, you know up.
411
00:24:17.759 --> 00:24:19.960
I'm sure she was laid up some nights to perspect
412
00:24:20.000 --> 00:24:22.200
that he was. But she wanted to get married just
413
00:24:22.279 --> 00:24:24.640
so much so she can have to say, you know,
414
00:24:24.839 --> 00:24:27.000
and I don't know her specific situation, but that's what
415
00:24:27.079 --> 00:24:29.319
happens to a lot of people. They miss out on
416
00:24:29.400 --> 00:24:31.960
the red flags because of the thing you want, and
417
00:24:32.480 --> 00:24:35.559
you can't want the thing so much that your vision
418
00:24:35.720 --> 00:24:39.160
is now blinded by good You know, you you're not
419
00:24:39.240 --> 00:24:42.720
making good decisions because you're desperate for their end results.
420
00:24:43.079 --> 00:24:47.839
I mean, you know, Forensic says many wouldn't be interested
421
00:24:47.839 --> 00:24:50.559
in any Rihanna anyway since she ain't FBA at all.
422
00:24:50.960 --> 00:24:58.240
I'm sorry, Forensic earlying. I'm sorry you foundational Black American
423
00:24:58.400 --> 00:25:01.519
like because she's from Barbadi and not from here. That's
424
00:25:01.680 --> 00:25:04.119
just those are the things folks say when they think
425
00:25:04.279 --> 00:25:09.079
Rihanna will never ever be interested in them. You know,
426
00:25:10.079 --> 00:25:11.400
would you date Rihanna Miles?
427
00:25:15.240 --> 00:25:15.400
Yes?
428
00:25:15.599 --> 00:25:24.960
What but if but if a woman tells you I'm celibate,
429
00:25:25.200 --> 00:25:27.279
would that be a red flag or a green flag
430
00:25:27.359 --> 00:25:28.759
for you? That's not it.
431
00:25:29.000 --> 00:25:31.000
That's not a red flag. I mean it's a conversation
432
00:25:31.119 --> 00:25:32.880
to have, for sure, but I mean it does not
433
00:25:32.960 --> 00:25:34.720
a red flag. I'm not holding nothing against you for that.
434
00:25:34.880 --> 00:25:37.400
I mean, you know, it's it's your reasoning for everything,
435
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:37.839
for sure.
436
00:25:39.400 --> 00:25:39.640
Yeah.
437
00:25:40.519 --> 00:25:43.400
Some people that told me they've been offended by a
438
00:25:43.559 --> 00:25:47.759
man told me that he was offended when he hears
439
00:25:48.319 --> 00:25:52.119
a woman is celibate, like he takes personal offense. And
440
00:25:52.279 --> 00:25:55.279
see that's a man right there. He lived by his flesh.
441
00:25:55.400 --> 00:25:58.839
And you know this, this man was also single. And
442
00:25:59.160 --> 00:26:01.640
and it's because you living by the flash and you
443
00:26:01.839 --> 00:26:03.000
need everybody to sleep with you.
444
00:26:03.200 --> 00:26:09.039
Last week, Forensica to count and says Dominque, I'm being facetious. Okay, good,
445
00:26:09.119 --> 00:26:11.680
because I knew that was a lie. If Rihanna came
446
00:26:11.759 --> 00:26:14.079
up and started nibbling on your neck, it would be over.
447
00:26:15.359 --> 00:26:18.480
Just saying, but what's the endgame? I mean, if you
448
00:26:18.599 --> 00:26:22.839
met a woman, Miles who said I'm celibate by choice,
449
00:26:24.240 --> 00:26:26.799
would you date her? Because I feel like that means
450
00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:31.920
probably And maybe maybe I'm making an assumption, Dell, but
451
00:26:32.079 --> 00:26:34.279
to me, it sounds like she's waiting for marriage.
452
00:26:34.519 --> 00:26:36.440
I mean that's why I'm saying the conversation should be
453
00:26:36.519 --> 00:26:39.279
had at that point. It's not an automatic deal breaker because,
454
00:26:39.279 --> 00:26:41.119
like I say, it could be for any number of reasons,
455
00:26:41.160 --> 00:26:43.640
your health reasons, your personal reasons, your spiritual journey.
456
00:26:43.640 --> 00:26:45.359
I get it, I get and understand all of them.
457
00:26:45.400 --> 00:26:47.119
I may not be the man to stick around with
458
00:26:47.279 --> 00:26:49.319
you through all that, but it's worth a conversation for show.
459
00:26:49.359 --> 00:26:50.160
It's not a deal breaker.
460
00:26:51.039 --> 00:26:54.920
And what is what is the endgame? I mean, when
461
00:26:55.000 --> 00:26:58.880
do you break the fasts? Dell? Are we waiting forever?
462
00:26:59.119 --> 00:27:01.279
Are we waiting till we get married? Are you waiting
463
00:27:01.440 --> 00:27:05.279
until you know? The Lord comes down and says, that's
464
00:27:05.359 --> 00:27:07.880
your guy. You don't have to marry him. You can
465
00:27:08.039 --> 00:27:10.440
sleep for them tonight, Like, what what's.
466
00:27:10.319 --> 00:27:14.200
The down and say I'm gonna sleep with him tonight?
467
00:27:14.440 --> 00:27:16.319
The NOOI ain't. I'm gonna come down and say that.
468
00:27:16.759 --> 00:27:20.240
The thing about it, too is you know, uh, I
469
00:27:20.400 --> 00:27:24.480
feel like when you are when you have an exploration
470
00:27:24.720 --> 00:27:29.519
date is because you don't believe it's gonna happen, so
471
00:27:29.680 --> 00:27:32.440
you just like it don't happen by this day, I'm
472
00:27:32.480 --> 00:27:35.960
gonna just do it. It's gonna happen. I'm worthy of
473
00:27:36.160 --> 00:27:39.759
a person, you know. I'm worthy of a person. First
474
00:27:39.759 --> 00:27:42.960
of all, I've been married before, okay, and I'm worthy
475
00:27:43.079 --> 00:27:46.079
of a person. So if I'm worthy of a person,
476
00:27:46.400 --> 00:27:48.880
that means that I know that someone is out there
477
00:27:49.279 --> 00:27:51.960
and guess what, I don't feel like my husband is
478
00:27:52.079 --> 00:27:54.720
somewhere dumps and diving in the trash can, sleeping with
479
00:27:54.799 --> 00:27:57.680
everybody on the first night, just until he gets to me.
480
00:27:57.880 --> 00:28:00.680
I do believe that he is also a man that's
481
00:28:00.839 --> 00:28:04.279
just like me. That's practice of self control and walking
482
00:28:04.359 --> 00:28:06.799
with the law and on purpose. And I feel like
483
00:28:06.960 --> 00:28:09.799
a lot of people are lacking, Like when you are
484
00:28:09.920 --> 00:28:13.359
living by the flesh, you're just so desiring the flesh.
485
00:28:13.599 --> 00:28:17.119
A lot of times you're lacking purpose, lacking.
486
00:28:17.200 --> 00:28:20.240
Okay, I see Miles making a face, So Miles wants
487
00:28:20.240 --> 00:28:21.759
to say, so, I'm gonna turn it over to him
488
00:28:22.079 --> 00:28:23.640
instead of what I was about to say.
489
00:28:23.799 --> 00:28:26.559
So, I gotta remember we're talking about celibacy, so I
490
00:28:26.640 --> 00:28:29.559
want to stay on topic a little bit. But if
491
00:28:29.839 --> 00:28:32.039
if a man wants to take his time before he
492
00:28:32.079 --> 00:28:33.519
gets down on one knee and marror, you had a
493
00:28:33.559 --> 00:28:35.720
time dating the end date for that before you walk away,
494
00:28:35.759 --> 00:28:37.240
and you say, you know what, he's not the one
495
00:28:37.319 --> 00:28:37.519
for you.
496
00:28:37.599 --> 00:28:39.319
So I mean, what's what's wrong withold happen to end
497
00:28:39.359 --> 00:28:39.720
date for it?
498
00:28:42.480 --> 00:28:44.640
Having an end date for the celibacy.
499
00:28:44.880 --> 00:28:46.880
The celibacy, you're saying, there's no end date for it's
500
00:28:46.880 --> 00:28:49.000
gonna happen eventually. Just wait on it's gonna happen. To
501
00:28:49.119 --> 00:28:51.119
act like it's not gonna happen, you being impatient. If
502
00:28:51.160 --> 00:28:53.039
I said the same thing about getting down and getting
503
00:28:53.039 --> 00:28:54.319
you that ring and making you my wife.
504
00:28:54.400 --> 00:28:54.839
I love you.
505
00:28:55.279 --> 00:28:58.319
It's gonna happen like I love you. We have we're
506
00:28:58.480 --> 00:28:59.240
building something.
507
00:28:59.440 --> 00:29:02.680
Yeah, and also right, well'll let you answer his question.
508
00:29:02.799 --> 00:29:07.200
Okay, but again, but if if it is gonna happen,
509
00:29:07.480 --> 00:29:10.880
then we just don't wait on each other. If you
510
00:29:11.119 --> 00:29:14.440
need me to, if you need me to, now hurry
511
00:29:14.559 --> 00:29:17.799
up my process. So, but I need to wait on
512
00:29:17.920 --> 00:29:20.880
your process, then we are not equally your So.
513
00:29:21.319 --> 00:29:24.640
So no, no test drive at all. You're gonna marry
514
00:29:24.680 --> 00:29:28.119
this person without ever sampling the goods?
515
00:29:29.400 --> 00:29:35.359
Okay, but the thing about it too, Okay, No, No,
516
00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:38.240
I'm going to answer it to you right now. First
517
00:29:38.240 --> 00:29:40.359
of all, I don't be friends with you at all
518
00:29:40.519 --> 00:29:42.839
unless I know it's good. But I don't need to
519
00:29:42.880 --> 00:29:45.319
sleep with you. My instinct is, oh, I've had a
520
00:29:45.440 --> 00:29:47.400
past life, so I can look at a man and
521
00:29:47.480 --> 00:29:49.920
I can see exactly with this section is I can
522
00:29:49.960 --> 00:29:51.599
see if you're good. I can see if you're not
523
00:29:51.920 --> 00:29:52.680
within second.
524
00:29:53.279 --> 00:29:57.000
So okay, well, that would be a hell of a
525
00:29:57.079 --> 00:30:00.480
mistake if you were just wrong that one time. Now
526
00:30:00.519 --> 00:30:11.480
it's okay, all right, Uh, we don't leave that right there. No,
527
00:30:11.720 --> 00:30:15.640
because honestly, there's some things that are chemistry, and it
528
00:30:15.759 --> 00:30:18.519
doesn't only have to do with equipment. If that's what
529
00:30:18.599 --> 00:30:23.319
you're looking at, IM just saying uh anyway.
530
00:30:23.720 --> 00:30:26.039
So no, no, no, but I feel like that's why
531
00:30:26.160 --> 00:30:27.759
you get to know a See.
532
00:30:27.839 --> 00:30:28.279
This is the thing.
533
00:30:28.440 --> 00:30:31.200
The thing about it, too, is when you're getting to
534
00:30:31.400 --> 00:30:34.920
know a person, these are the things that bond you
535
00:30:35.680 --> 00:30:39.359
like you can when you's sex as one bond, But
536
00:30:39.559 --> 00:30:42.039
there are so many other bonds that you need to
537
00:30:42.160 --> 00:30:45.839
make before you jump over into this field, because sex
538
00:30:46.039 --> 00:30:49.079
before you know all all these other bonds is a
539
00:30:49.160 --> 00:30:50.880
false bar. And then you wake up in the morning,
540
00:30:51.200 --> 00:30:53.359
you know, three months later and be like, I actually
541
00:30:53.400 --> 00:30:55.920
hate this person. And that's what happens a lot of people.
542
00:30:56.400 --> 00:30:59.359
You get you have it said, he looks so good
543
00:30:59.759 --> 00:31:01.519
you it's like I just met this dude. He looks
544
00:31:01.519 --> 00:31:04.240
Oh my god, he is and then you'd be like,
545
00:31:04.359 --> 00:31:08.160
wait a minute, this old on, this brother is inconsistent,
546
00:31:08.279 --> 00:31:10.440
this brother is this. And this is not to take
547
00:31:10.519 --> 00:31:13.160
every man, but I'm talking about when you don't take
548
00:31:13.200 --> 00:31:13.680
the time.
549
00:31:14.079 --> 00:31:15.680
Yeah, go ahead, Miles.
550
00:31:16.839 --> 00:31:19.559
Is bad sex a relationship ender for you? Or do
551
00:31:19.599 --> 00:31:21.400
you stay with mister bad sex?
552
00:31:23.319 --> 00:31:23.480
Oh?
553
00:31:23.559 --> 00:31:27.079
No, bad sex is a is a relationship not starter.
554
00:31:27.680 --> 00:31:30.119
If I don't think it's that we don't even we
555
00:31:30.240 --> 00:31:32.599
don't even get to know each other. We don't talk.
556
00:31:33.319 --> 00:31:37.839
But since you're celeb, wouldn't know until you already said I.
557
00:31:37.920 --> 00:31:40.920
Do, I wouldn't know immediately. I would know immediately.
558
00:31:41.359 --> 00:31:44.240
Okay, well maybe you know what, Maybe I need to
559
00:31:44.279 --> 00:31:47.720
have you vet anyway, I know. I mean, it was
560
00:31:47.759 --> 00:31:51.000
the same question Joki said. He says, what if you're perfect,
561
00:31:51.039 --> 00:31:53.359
man doesn't have a magic one? Is that a deal breaker?
562
00:31:53.720 --> 00:31:55.720
But you've already said I do. You're not gonna go
563
00:31:55.799 --> 00:32:00.480
get another divorce because the man is the fishing in
564
00:32:00.559 --> 00:32:00.960
the sack.
565
00:32:02.640 --> 00:32:06.960
I think that, y'all like and and and maybe it's
566
00:32:07.000 --> 00:32:10.480
because I have had I have lived a very full
567
00:32:10.680 --> 00:32:14.839
life in this area. My my body does not even
568
00:32:14.960 --> 00:32:19.720
wake up until we are sexually compatible. So like, I
569
00:32:19.759 --> 00:32:22.759
don't I know it off the break and yours doesn't either,
570
00:32:22.920 --> 00:32:26.799
Like you know, it's something that's natural with us when
571
00:32:26.839 --> 00:32:29.279
you when you take away the desperation, it's something that's
572
00:32:29.440 --> 00:32:32.720
natural like and mouth, please speak to this too. It's
573
00:32:32.799 --> 00:32:36.720
just something about your body that you know what it's
574
00:32:36.759 --> 00:32:38.480
gonna be like with this word, It's like when I
575
00:32:38.640 --> 00:32:41.440
meet some men something that I've had sexual relationship with,
576
00:32:42.039 --> 00:32:44.359
I already knew it was good, Like just talking on
577
00:32:44.440 --> 00:32:46.200
the phone. I already knew what it was gonna be like.
578
00:32:46.599 --> 00:32:49.039
I didn't have to guess that is what you know.
579
00:32:50.519 --> 00:32:55.720
You be delusional and sincere at the same time. If
580
00:32:55.759 --> 00:32:57.839
you're not a vision and you're talking about getting married
581
00:32:57.880 --> 00:33:00.319
but your celibate, I'm going to want to test drive
582
00:33:00.400 --> 00:33:00.960
before I.
583
00:33:01.240 --> 00:33:05.519
Buy, just saying, please test drive all day long email.
584
00:33:05.599 --> 00:33:08.119
But are you married right now? Are you married right now?
585
00:33:08.319 --> 00:33:11.000
I don't think he is. I think he's in our relationship,
586
00:33:12.359 --> 00:33:14.720
test driving with no car note.
587
00:33:17.200 --> 00:33:20.079
Going down to the dealer, just test driving it. Yes,
588
00:33:20.200 --> 00:33:24.000
but is never gonna get an official loan. She is
589
00:33:24.119 --> 00:33:26.480
never gonna get the car. Note that you've been pro.
590
00:33:27.400 --> 00:33:30.880
Paul says, you're you're in the X Men. You got superpowers?
591
00:33:31.119 --> 00:33:33.720
All right, we'll shoot Dale Harrison, you might need them.
592
00:33:34.039 --> 00:33:38.559
We're talking celibacy. I'm not judging. I'm just trying to
593
00:33:39.039 --> 00:33:42.880
understand and of course having some conversation. That's what we
594
00:33:42.960 --> 00:33:47.640
do around here. We are KBLA Talk fifteen eighty DJ
595
00:33:48.039 --> 00:33:50.720
Black nine or nine says A no shame in celibacy
596
00:33:50.960 --> 00:33:55.039
and abstinence, certainly not saying there's shame in it. For me,
597
00:33:55.119 --> 00:33:56.920
it would be like I think it would be like
598
00:33:57.480 --> 00:34:00.279
going on a really strict diet. The minute I do that,
599
00:34:00.400 --> 00:34:03.160
I want to eat all the time. If I'm just
600
00:34:03.279 --> 00:34:05.599
living my life and I'm not focused on that, I'm
601
00:34:06.119 --> 00:34:08.719
you know, just living my life and and I'm still
602
00:34:08.800 --> 00:34:11.800
living within my morals and principles. It's not for me.
603
00:34:11.920 --> 00:34:15.320
It's not one extreme either your dumpster diving, as del
604
00:34:15.400 --> 00:34:19.440
Harrison so delicately put it, or you're you know, or
605
00:34:19.559 --> 00:34:22.519
you're absin, and I fully feel like there's a there's
606
00:34:22.559 --> 00:34:27.400
a sweet spot in between. Miles. Would you ever go celibate?
607
00:34:28.320 --> 00:34:30.920
Yeah, I'm curious that how long is it had to
608
00:34:30.960 --> 00:34:32.280
be gone to you consider?
609
00:34:34.760 --> 00:34:38.079
How long do you do without when until it's considered? Yeah,
610
00:34:38.119 --> 00:34:40.000
that's true. I'm celibating.
611
00:34:43.960 --> 00:34:44.360
The summer.
612
00:34:44.440 --> 00:34:51.320
So yeah, I think it's when it's intentional, you know,
613
00:34:52.559 --> 00:34:55.199
when you when you just yeah, if it's on purpose,
614
00:34:55.280 --> 00:34:57.679
then yeah, you've been celebrated. That's that's what it is.
615
00:34:57.880 --> 00:35:00.559
I mean, you know, Okay, so even if it's minutes
616
00:35:00.679 --> 00:35:05.679
because you intentionally said that you're celibate, it counts. Got it.
617
00:35:06.159 --> 00:35:09.800
Speaking of sex, the US Supreme Court did reject Donald
618
00:35:09.800 --> 00:35:13.480
Trump's push thank you forensic to throw out that verdict
619
00:35:13.519 --> 00:35:16.880
and the sex abuse case. So celibate or otherwise, e
620
00:35:17.039 --> 00:35:20.679
gen Carrol is going to keep her five point three million,
621
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:26.039
and she may be getting the eighty three million. So anyway,
622
00:35:26.119 --> 00:35:30.519
I digress. So how's it going? Do you feel better?
623
00:35:30.679 --> 00:35:33.800
Do you feel different? Do you? I mean you said
624
00:35:33.840 --> 00:35:37.079
you got these spidy senses going where you can. I'm sorry,
625
00:35:37.119 --> 00:35:41.599
I don't mean to question your but you you never know.
626
00:35:42.039 --> 00:35:44.880
But anyway, are you feeling different? Is there? Are you
627
00:35:45.000 --> 00:35:47.840
feeling the upside of this decision in your life and
628
00:35:49.440 --> 00:35:51.119
and and seeing the benefits of it.
629
00:35:53.360 --> 00:35:57.000
Yeah, I'm definitely seeing the benefits. Also to Dominique, we
630
00:35:57.079 --> 00:36:00.079
need to go out so I can go head and
631
00:36:00.159 --> 00:36:02.199
and vc you some guys and then you can test
632
00:36:02.280 --> 00:36:04.239
out my theory and you can let me know that
633
00:36:04.320 --> 00:36:04.800
you got.
634
00:36:06.079 --> 00:36:08.400
Sleeping with a bunch of guys, like what the heck?
635
00:36:08.559 --> 00:36:14.960
No, No, I turn out the absolute one, just one.
636
00:36:16.519 --> 00:36:16.559
No.
637
00:36:16.760 --> 00:36:19.079
I'm talking about you saying you don't know what the
638
00:36:19.199 --> 00:36:21.519
sex is like, and I'm making you know. We can
639
00:36:21.599 --> 00:36:23.679
spend one night out and I could be like, ah,
640
00:36:24.000 --> 00:36:27.840
dominate don't was okay, I think he now he gonna
641
00:36:27.840 --> 00:36:30.079
be like, I'm telling you you need to go out
642
00:36:30.199 --> 00:36:33.360
because I don't. You know, at this day and age,
643
00:36:33.639 --> 00:36:37.559
you know, fighting senses is way up, but it's going way.
644
00:36:37.679 --> 00:36:42.400
It's going well because I don't have the interference of
645
00:36:42.639 --> 00:36:48.039
the flash constantly, you know, directing my emotion.
646
00:36:48.360 --> 00:36:53.400
As doctor gill as Doctor gil Wyatt, the sex therapist, psychologist,
647
00:36:53.480 --> 00:36:57.320
psychiatrist says sex is a human need like food, water,
648
00:36:58.679 --> 00:37:03.599
you know, housing, you know, human touch and sexuality is
649
00:37:03.679 --> 00:37:05.960
one of our needs. So you could go the other
650
00:37:06.039 --> 00:37:09.320
way and say you're gonna get more uptight, less relax
651
00:37:09.440 --> 00:37:12.960
perhaps less likely to make a clear eye decision if
652
00:37:13.000 --> 00:37:14.880
you go too long without any sex.
653
00:37:16.360 --> 00:37:20.079
Okay, sex is a need, I completely agree. But just
654
00:37:20.159 --> 00:37:21.920
like people fast from sugar.
655
00:37:22.119 --> 00:37:25.440
And you know, sure is not a need. Coffee is
656
00:37:25.559 --> 00:37:26.119
not a need.
657
00:37:27.199 --> 00:37:31.039
Okay. But just like people fast, the body from different
658
00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:35.280
things that they need to clear it out of, sex
659
00:37:35.440 --> 00:37:38.599
is one of those things. It's a need, especially when
660
00:37:38.639 --> 00:37:41.239
you have a right partner. But I'm sure if you
661
00:37:41.320 --> 00:37:43.440
talk to Yail right now, she's like, oh, don't just
662
00:37:43.480 --> 00:37:47.360
sleep with anybody. You're gonna have to find rightfully aligned partner.
663
00:37:47.480 --> 00:37:49.719
Well, yeah, she does say don't just sleep with anyone.
664
00:37:49.840 --> 00:37:53.280
But and in fact she says, when you don't have anyone,
665
00:37:53.360 --> 00:37:56.519
you're better off pleasure in yourself than going without. But
666
00:37:56.679 --> 00:38:00.840
that's another conversation for another day perhaps, But I don't
667
00:38:00.880 --> 00:38:03.360
think it's you know, that's like saying, oh, hunger is
668
00:38:03.400 --> 00:38:05.239
only a need when you have good food. No, you
669
00:38:05.400 --> 00:38:08.000
have to have food. I mean, you know, I rather
670
00:38:08.079 --> 00:38:09.800
you don't eat fast food, but I don't want you
671
00:38:09.920 --> 00:38:10.280
to die.
672
00:38:12.960 --> 00:38:15.800
Yeah. The thing is too is sex is not the
673
00:38:15.920 --> 00:38:20.679
same as fast food. Sex is something that is going
674
00:38:20.960 --> 00:38:25.519
into your body from another person. So that's why you
675
00:38:25.639 --> 00:38:28.119
need it rightfully alive. Fast food you go over here
676
00:38:28.159 --> 00:38:31.199
and get your own Popeyes yourself, you know, and you
677
00:38:31.280 --> 00:38:33.320
can do whatever you want to with the fried chicken,
678
00:38:33.480 --> 00:38:35.199
even though you're not supposed to be having it. But
679
00:38:35.480 --> 00:38:39.320
seg it can destroy you when you are after it
680
00:38:40.199 --> 00:38:44.760
from anyone. And that's what people got to understand is, yeah,
681
00:38:44.840 --> 00:38:46.639
it's a need. Yeah, we need to be having And
682
00:38:46.760 --> 00:38:49.440
this does not mean you can't meet someone. And y'all
683
00:38:49.599 --> 00:38:54.400
not affectionate, y'all not hugging you know, y'all. I mean
684
00:38:54.599 --> 00:38:58.320
I don't be kissing. You know I'm not I'm not
685
00:38:58.599 --> 00:39:00.360
said I'm not a kisser or whatever, but you know,
686
00:39:00.800 --> 00:39:04.440
a hug is extremely intimate. The kids on the forehead
687
00:39:04.559 --> 00:39:07.480
is extremely intimate. So there are some things you can
688
00:39:07.599 --> 00:39:11.360
experience when you're dating someone that that makes it feel
689
00:39:11.440 --> 00:39:13.960
like say, that makes it feel just as fulfilling with
690
00:39:14.119 --> 00:39:16.360
the touch, because it's the tail.
691
00:39:16.599 --> 00:39:19.119
We don't leave it there because it's almost time to
692
00:39:19.440 --> 00:39:22.639
pass the mic. Mind folks how to find you your
693
00:39:22.719 --> 00:39:25.480
come by a app so they can find someone celibate
694
00:39:25.559 --> 00:39:26.199
or otherwise.
695
00:39:27.599 --> 00:39:33.519
Okay, y'all find me and I am Dale Harrison. Find
696
00:39:33.599 --> 00:39:36.960
my app AI. It is a comby Yer is not
697
00:39:37.079 --> 00:39:39.679
a dating app. It is an AI powered location to
698
00:39:40.199 --> 00:39:43.360
the health Black singles over forty five each other in person.
699
00:39:43.679 --> 00:39:45.960
So you're not going on the apps to anyone and
700
00:39:46.079 --> 00:39:48.760
swipe and send out any d M. You're going on
701
00:39:48.920 --> 00:39:51.480
there so that you could check in. The checking list
702
00:39:51.599 --> 00:39:53.639
is available for you to find where people are and
703
00:39:53.760 --> 00:39:56.719
then you're gonna see the heat map to see the
704
00:39:56.840 --> 00:39:58.199
area popular singles.
705
00:40:00.559 --> 00:40:04.760
Komb Ye Del Harrison, thank you so much. I always
706
00:40:04.800 --> 00:40:07.440
appreciate the conversation with you. You're such a great sport.
707
00:40:08.519 --> 00:40:10.880
Thank you so much, and you can tap in with
708
00:40:10.960 --> 00:40:13.800
me at Duprema Radio, d P R I, m A
709
00:40:14.039 --> 00:40:16.559
and then radio on all platforms. You can find us
710
00:40:17.119 --> 00:40:21.199
at KBLA fifteen eighty. It's time for me to pass
711
00:40:21.280 --> 00:40:25.880
the mic. Doctor Cornell West End, Congresswoman Maxine Waters coming
712
00:40:25.960 --> 00:40:28.599
up next hour. Like my mama, the late great Diane
713
00:40:28.679 --> 00:40:32.400
da Prima used to say, the ultimate famine is the
714
00:40:32.480 --> 00:40:37.239
starvation of the imagination. Until next time, my KBLA delegation,
715
00:40:38.039 --> 00:40:38.599
one love,