294. The Nickname, The Private Stuff, and The Ending ft. Skyline

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[SPEAKER_01]: We didn't decide it right away.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And we got input from the patrons and Erica came up with Skyline.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm pretty sure some of the options, two of the leading options were long sleeves or sleeves or ink master.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Hello and welcome to the second to last episode of finally Mr. Hight the podcast.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm your host, Allie Jackson.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I am here with my very last, well, I guess next week we're doing work in Erica.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So they will technically be the very last guests.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But one of my very favorite guests that I've ever had on the pod, it's Emmy.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's Emmy, she's here.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Say hi.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, Emmy didn't want to say hi.
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[SPEAKER_01]: That's fine.
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[SPEAKER_01]: OK.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Skyline's here.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Hello.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Hi, um, so we're ending the pod and we'll buy them.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We, I mean me.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I thought that that was out to the world where to me personally.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, it was to you.
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[SPEAKER_01]: That isn't that is like a constant issue in our house.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Is it am I talking to you or am I talking to the world?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you have like recording voice and then ask me questions voice, but sometimes they're not very clear.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So I'll answer something you're saying to the world or ignore you when you're asking me something very specific.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, well, no, that's like, I've got to say not anymore, but that's not true because that never happens when I'm recording because when I record a pod, I'm close in a room.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Usually that one's pretty clear.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So that is she won't go away.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm so sorry.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So we met when this show was like, obviously, already running, um,
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm curious, when did you find out, we're going back to us meeting?
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[SPEAKER_01]: When did you, like, what was your knowledge of my social media presence prior to us going out?
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[SPEAKER_01]: I don't actually know if I know the answer to this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Zero.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I, I, I, I, I think the first I heard of it was when you told me about it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, our mutual friend hadn't mentioned it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I wasn't sure if he like not that there was no relevancy to it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And he like I love the guy to death, but I don't know if he remembered that or if it stayed in the top of his mind when he was introducing us.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, very fair.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, only because it often will come up.
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[SPEAKER_01]: in a dating context because one of the first conversations you when I had was in the group at that bar about dating.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Remember we were all talking about hinge and stuff.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so often times in conversations like that, somebody will bring up like, oh well like I always talks about dating online or something like, you know what I mean?
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[SPEAKER_01]: It's like I couldn't remember if that had come up or if he had like mentioned it to you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I don't think so.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: There's a there's a chance, but I'm pretty sure now.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Do you remember when, and when you found out and like what that was like, um, I mean, I think you told me.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I remember telling you, probably the first time we like legitimately hung out and that wasn't just hammered playing drinking games all day at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the beer at the
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's like, okay, that's cool.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But obviously even hearing about something you don't really understand what that thing is.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I make videos and I do podcasts.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's like, okay, great.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what is that?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Is that monthly?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Is it yearly?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Is it yearly?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what's in there?
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[SPEAKER_01]: It's an annual podcast.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So, I don't think I thought anything of it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You know, especially,
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[SPEAKER_00]: because it didn't seem like, you were talking very positively about it, your friends were all talking positively about it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You know, as we had more converse and hung out more frequently.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So it was like, yeah, it wasn't gonna, I don't think it was gonna be a bad thing.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, you're gonna speak talking shit about me or something, on line to people every week.
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[SPEAKER_00]: No, you know, not that I know of.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But maybe.
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[SPEAKER_01]: When did you first, like, did you like look me up after that?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Because you're not even on, I mean, you have a social media, you have an Instagram, but like you never go on.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I probably, I think after we had gone on a couple of dates, or maybe even just one.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then I was like listening to your podcast.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because you were talking about updates to your dates that you were going on.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, after I knew that's kind of the format of what was happening, just to see if I was in the conversation at all,
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[SPEAKER_01]: Imagine I didn't mention you at all.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It would have been tough.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It would have been tough.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So I think I listened in there to see what was going on, to kind of feel out the competition a little bit as well, which is fun.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This feels like a less like a kind of a job interview almost where you're hearing the feedback about how you're doing.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I never thought about it that way, but you never get that at a job interview.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So this was a try today.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So it's yeah, it's better.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's like you're hearing behind the scenes the feedback from your last session, your last interview, your last date.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like you're hiding in the office just listening in.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So it's interesting, but then also frustrating when somebody else, you thought would good day with somebody else.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'll get that guy.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, good news.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I worked out.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Did was there any like what were your feelings about me like talking about that kind of stuff public, especially I think as we became more serious.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like in the beginning, it's like all funsies and we went out of fun day, we did this and you know, you were very clear from the beginning that it was going to be like a pseudonym and
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[SPEAKER_00]: general updates like not super specific things like not getting very deep into like the super personal aspects of of what we have going on.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Which I think made it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, if it was like putting my life in our life on blast to everybody every week, maybe that would be a different story.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, because something that I struggled with and continue to, honestly, is like that the transition from talking about my dating life to talking about my relationship.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It's like going from the abstract to the specific because when I'm talking about my dating life, it is like a variety of anonymous men right like I went on two days with this guy when I'm three days with this guy or like even people that I dated for like a little bit longer than that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It never got to the point where like their in pictures with me on my socials or like their friends are also following me and I'm friends with them and And also the things that I'm talking about in those stages are so surface level right in early dating.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Hopefully you know sure and it feels easier to know what I want to share and what I don't
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[SPEAKER_01]: And then one of the things that I kind of struggled with in the transition was exactly what you said in terms of like, I don't want to put out personal life on blast on a weekly basis, also there isn't as much to talk about when you're just in a relationship, like, you know, like there is when I went on three days last week or, you know, didn't hear from this guy.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so we sat on different sides of the couch today and got taken.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It was great.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So there's both, I think, the transition for me was both that in the sense that it's like, there isn't that much to update on, but then also, now there's someone else involved.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And there were always other people involved, but they were involved at such a distance that it didn't really matter.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Do you know what I mean?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so that's, I think that has been a harder part for me of doing this while in a relationship
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[SPEAKER_01]: wanting the show to still be like real and honest and talk about shit that people are going through.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But at the same time, it's like, well, there's stuff that is personal.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And like, how do you, it's harder to figure that out in this stage of life than it was in dating?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Does that make sense?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: One because you'd been doing the other thing for so long.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It was just easy to actually have that flow and that's all right.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But yeah, it is hard to pull out the pieces that you want to versus not want to talk about and still keep it interesting.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's like there's a lot of stuff I'm sure that we could talk about, but that would be a little bit more than maybe you or I would want to put out there.
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[SPEAKER_00]: which takes away a little bit from the entertainment value of what you're talking about when you've got to hold so much closer to the chest, you know?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, because it's like, you know, there are things that
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[SPEAKER_01]: One of us might be going through individually that then we're navigating together.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And it's like, well, I don't wanna put that thing on blast, like I'm thinking of a few things in each of our personal lives right over the last two years that have been really hard, but are also super personal and not really actually related to us, but then we navigate them together.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But it's like, it's difficult even right now as I'm trying to talk around it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It was one of those things where I'm like, well, it feels like it would be difficult for me to talk about navigating this thing without all the context of the thing.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So I just probably just shouldn't talk about it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, because then that's a lot of setup.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then by the time you get done like explaining it, then it's like, well, this was, I feel like I'm just telling a story to party that people have already tuned out of at this point.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Literally, literally.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, but so, so that I think that has been hard in a ways that I didn't expect.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But one of the questions that I got, so I'd ask listeners to send me questions and things and stuff for my final art.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And a lot of people assumed that I was probably going to have you on.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was like, there were questions kind of like about us and about me and everything.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And one of the questions that I got was what something that Skyline has vetoed you talking about.
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[SPEAKER_01]: actually realize there's nothing.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I think I don't think there's anything because I don't think you've come to me and said I'm planning to talk about X, Y and Z things.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's been really self policing.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I have like so I've been felt like I needed to worry about it or ask like hey this thing happened.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Are you going to talk about it?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Talk about this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's never been something that's come up.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It feels obvious.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: of things that, yeah, are like, personal to one or each of us, or whatever it is.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, but yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So that, that has been like a little, I think, harder to navigate on my end.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But obviously, like, also like a wonderful thing.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Like, I'm glad that I don't have exciting things to talk about every week anymore, because, yeah, sometimes life is just a little boring, but in a really comfortable, lovely way.
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[SPEAKER_01]: In a good way.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so, yeah, it's a good and a bad thing.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, less content.
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[SPEAKER_00]: easier day-to-day life, probably.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Fix considered.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, very true.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's like I'm glad.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm glad that I am not leading a like shocking content life for like things are constantly happening to me or to us that would be like a incredible content, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Because that would be really stressful.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It would be a lot.
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[SPEAKER_01]: What do you think your, like people close to you think about that, like your friends or your family
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, just the content creation, like the all of it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, like me being, you know, kind of more of a public person.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Um, I don't know.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like nobody's really talked to me about it, like critically.
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[SPEAKER_00]: We're like had anything to say about it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I think the people that have talked about it have said, like my mom, for example, like it's fun to hear.
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[SPEAKER_00]: about the things going on in those lives from a different perspective or just to a different audience, but I can like listen in versus.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Hi, Skyline's mom.
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[SPEAKER_00]: By the way, because she is just telling me some updates about your your life when we're talking on the phone.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like it's just like a different avenue for similar information.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I think I think friends and family my read is it's kind of that where it's like they're getting like they know a lot of the stuff already, but they're getting a little bit more or a different take on it versus
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[SPEAKER_00]: stuff that we just have told them for the first time.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm sure there's probably people that are annoying by it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I, you know, like this is just the way it goes, but nobody's sending it to me in a critical way.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: At least, which is good.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's something that I thought about that I think about a lot was we're with your family or things like that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It's like I did a video about the beach trip that we were at.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I was very cognizant in doing it for it to be about me and us and our time at the beach and they're ended a little bit.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But I never want them to feel like they're on display because I'm on display.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I feel the same way about my friends.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I've had conversations with all my friends that they're comfortable being in my videos and like we have that kind of blanket understanding.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Of course, if they ever said, you know, I actually don't want to be, then of course.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But I'm very cognizant of that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And it's like, it's never something that I would want anybody to feel uncomfortable with, you know?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Even like, I would say outside of the podcast.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I would say like my social media stuff is probably even more so where that could creep in than this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, because that's easier to catch somebody off guard.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, right.
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[SPEAKER_01]: What do you think?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, I actually got a fun question.
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[SPEAKER_01]: If you could have picked your nickname.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So first of all, how do you feel about Skyrim?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Let's start.
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[SPEAKER_01]: How do you feel about Skyrim?
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's, I like it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's, it's a call back to a funny moment for when we first met.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's, it's pretty,
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's just like a very, it's not, I feel like a lot of nicknames can be greater terrible, like, depending on how, like, a first date when or how a couple of dates when.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, have you heard what yours could have been?
15:05.883 --> 15:06.163
[SPEAKER_00]: No.
15:06.803 --> 15:09.084
[SPEAKER_01]: So, thank goodness.
15:09.604 --> 15:10.244
[SPEAKER_01]: We didn't go.
15:10.264 --> 15:11.405
[SPEAKER_01]: I would have had to change them.
15:11.665 --> 15:12.525
[SPEAKER_01]: I would have had to change it.
15:12.725 --> 15:12.945
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
15:13.045 --> 15:19.887
[SPEAKER_01]: So when we were, when Erica and I were first chitchatting about what your nicknames should be, we didn't decide it right away.
15:21.018 --> 15:25.282
[SPEAKER_01]: And we got input from the patrons and Eric, I came up with Skyline, I'm pretty sure.
15:27.604 --> 15:38.914
[SPEAKER_01]: And some of the options, two of the leading options were long sleeves or sleeves or ink master.
15:39.355 --> 15:40.156
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, sure.
15:41.238 --> 15:43.360
[SPEAKER_01]: I, I would have had to change it.
15:43.500 --> 15:50.867
[SPEAKER_01]: I could, there would, it would be insane if I was still two years later referring to my partner as inkmaster.
15:51.587 --> 15:51.988
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
15:52.628 --> 15:53.629
[SPEAKER_00]: That one's not great.
15:54.810 --> 15:55.310
[SPEAKER_00]: Horrible.
15:55.391 --> 15:55.791
[SPEAKER_00]: Horrible.
15:56.191 --> 15:57.512
[SPEAKER_00]: But I, I would have assumed.
15:58.591 --> 16:08.466
[SPEAKER_00]: It probably would have had something to do with tattoos or being bald or something like that because... Yeah, that's.
16:08.747 --> 16:10.389
[SPEAKER_01]: Erica data to guy we called Mr. Cleene.
16:13.674 --> 16:13.914
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
16:15.257 --> 16:18.901
[SPEAKER_01]: There were some funny, one of the, so I'm recording, I recorded with work in Erica already.
16:19.081 --> 16:20.202
[SPEAKER_01]: The listeners haven't heard yet.
16:20.302 --> 16:21.924
[SPEAKER_01]: That's my last episode's coming out next week.
16:22.705 --> 16:25.948
[SPEAKER_01]: But I recorded it with them this week, because I'm gonna be gone.
16:27.189 --> 16:33.515
[SPEAKER_01]: And we were like reminiscing on old nicknames, Mr. Klee came up, but like to your point about like funny things.
16:34.797 --> 16:38.478
[SPEAKER_01]: I think my, I thought my favorite going in was, um, to sleepy.
16:39.098 --> 16:44.220
[SPEAKER_01]: We called this one guy to sleepy because he had, like, canceled on a date with work because he was too sleepy.
16:44.240 --> 16:44.800
[SPEAKER_01]: Tough.
16:44.860 --> 16:45.100
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
16:45.881 --> 16:51.222
[SPEAKER_01]: But then work reminded me that my actual favorite is a guy that we called lots of dogs here.
16:54.063 --> 16:54.243
[SPEAKER_00]: What?
16:54.863 --> 16:55.204
[SPEAKER_00]: Why?
16:55.224 --> 16:57.404
[SPEAKER_01]: He had text dinner.
16:58.585 --> 16:59.545
[SPEAKER_01]: He had text dinner.
17:00.871 --> 17:07.437
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, in between dates, I think he was at an outdoor bar or something like that.
17:07.477 --> 17:10.980
[SPEAKER_01]: It was either in between dates or it was when he was waiting for her to arrive to a date.
17:11.220 --> 17:11.440
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
17:11.841 --> 17:15.684
[SPEAKER_01]: And he was at, they were, they were going to maybe like a brewery or something like that.
17:16.364 --> 17:19.167
[SPEAKER_01]: And I actually know, I know for a fact, it was in between dates because,
17:20.958 --> 17:24.240
[SPEAKER_01]: It was one of those like, he's texting me, why is he texting me these things?
17:24.400 --> 17:26.701
[SPEAKER_01]: He just texted me like random updates.
17:26.981 --> 17:31.543
[SPEAKER_01]: And so he was like in this backyard if I think a brewery and like just sent a picture and was like lots of dogs here.
17:32.244 --> 17:34.465
[SPEAKER_01]: She was like, okay, good note.
17:35.285 --> 17:41.148
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm almost positive now that I'm telling the story that she was not on her way because that would have been perhaps relevant to her.
17:41.628 --> 17:42.969
[SPEAKER_01]: And it was okay, don't care.
17:45.741 --> 17:50.445
[SPEAKER_01]: We're exciting to work for our love dogs or relevant to me because I'm not there.
17:51.626 --> 17:52.848
[SPEAKER_01]: So we called him lots of dogs here.
17:53.268 --> 18:08.422
[SPEAKER_00]: Did you, um, did you ever have nicknames for someone on the pod, but then a separate maybe worse nickname for the people with friends or of course.
18:08.662 --> 18:08.882
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
18:11.024 --> 18:11.405
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
18:11.465 --> 18:11.745
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
18:12.875 --> 18:15.295
[SPEAKER_00]: like you just, the layers keep getting deeper and deeper.
18:15.355 --> 18:21.557
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, I almost never actually used the pod nicknames in real life, like with my friends.
18:21.997 --> 18:24.237
[SPEAKER_01]: Firstly, I would almost always use their regular name.
18:24.417 --> 18:25.577
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
18:26.057 --> 18:30.638
[SPEAKER_01]: But I'm not going to share that, but I can think of I'll tell you later.
18:30.678 --> 18:39.340
[SPEAKER_01]: I get think of a couple right now, like, once that work and I had for people that she did.
18:41.217 --> 18:42.257
[SPEAKER_01]: but yes, of course.
18:42.518 --> 18:47.359
[SPEAKER_01]: There was a stretch where a lot of people were like jobs, like it's just easy, right, to be like, oh, the accountant.
18:47.419 --> 18:52.241
[SPEAKER_01]: I had literally that was somebody that I did at the accountant or like whatever the journalist was another one.
18:54.122 --> 18:56.242
[SPEAKER_01]: And so we were trying to get a little more creative.
18:56.442 --> 19:00.104
[SPEAKER_01]: And therefore, then ended up with things like lots of dogs here and too sleepy.
19:00.144 --> 19:00.424
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
19:03.345 --> 19:04.245
[SPEAKER_01]: Mr. Worldwide.
19:06.726 --> 19:07.386
[SPEAKER_01]: That was fun.
19:07.406 --> 19:08.227
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I did.
19:08.247 --> 19:09.367
[SPEAKER_01]: There was a guy that I did right before you.
19:10.918 --> 19:36.596
[SPEAKER_01]: Also bald or just a big little fan or yeah, maybe also a pitball fan, pitball fan who knows Yeah, what would your nickname have been for me if you were Giving me a nickname to your friends at the time probably something to do with volleyball like like playing like being playing adult sports like athletic or
19:40.163 --> 19:45.448
[SPEAKER_00]: something around doing like doing content creation, social media and like some nickname around that.
19:45.508 --> 19:47.470
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I would you call me like the influencer?
19:47.490 --> 19:48.731
[SPEAKER_01]: Mate.
19:48.751 --> 19:49.932
[SPEAKER_01]: But they man.
19:52.594 --> 19:53.275
[SPEAKER_01]: Good grief.
19:53.796 --> 19:54.596
[SPEAKER_01]: Gonna end this now.
19:54.917 --> 19:55.337
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
19:55.357 --> 19:56.138
[SPEAKER_01]: Got him any the pod.
19:56.158 --> 19:57.139
[SPEAKER_01]: I can't be the influencer.
19:59.160 --> 19:59.401
[SPEAKER_01]: Bad.
20:00.181 --> 20:00.742
[SPEAKER_01]: Bad, bad, bad.
20:02.108 --> 20:10.734
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, but yeah, so one of the one of the questions that I got recently, I think I told you this was, um, somebody asked me like in all seriousness if I call you skyline in real life.
20:12.676 --> 20:15.157
[SPEAKER_01]: And I, oh yeah, because I, I filmed your reaction to it.
20:15.177 --> 20:17.319
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's like no.
20:18.971 --> 20:26.797
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, if we're out and you meet like meet people that know you from social media or the podcast, yes.
20:26.877 --> 20:27.097
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
20:27.137 --> 20:27.637
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's fine.
20:27.657 --> 20:30.019
[SPEAKER_00]: Like it doesn't feel weird when you do that.
20:30.239 --> 20:30.440
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
20:31.040 --> 20:32.181
[SPEAKER_00]: So yes, kind of.
20:32.521 --> 20:32.761
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
20:32.821 --> 20:33.782
[SPEAKER_00]: In that specific.
20:34.282 --> 20:34.743
[SPEAKER_00]: Generally.
20:34.783 --> 20:34.963
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
20:34.983 --> 20:38.285
[SPEAKER_01]: Because we have people who have come up to us, like on the subway.
20:38.305 --> 20:40.967
[SPEAKER_01]: The subway is like a very popular place for people who come up to us.
20:41.027 --> 20:41.287
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
20:41.988 --> 20:45.110
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, somebody came up to us because they recognized you first.
20:45.130 --> 20:46.131
[SPEAKER_01]: They recognized your tattoos.
20:46.151 --> 20:46.491
[SPEAKER_01]: Remember?
20:46.631 --> 20:46.912
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
20:48.635 --> 21:01.761
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, but yeah, in the in that situation, that's what they know you as, but like I never first thought pretty much never use your name anyway, we just pet names or whatever, just hey, but hey you over there.
21:01.801 --> 21:05.602
[SPEAKER_01]: Hey, it's just very rare that I would need to like get your attention using your name.
21:05.782 --> 21:05.962
[SPEAKER_01]: Right.
21:06.703 --> 21:09.504
[SPEAKER_01]: Similarly, like you very rarely call me alley.
21:09.864 --> 21:11.765
[SPEAKER_01]: There's like no reason to like
21:15.770 --> 21:40.815
[SPEAKER_00]: Babe usually works even out in public for some reason like you you catch it as like being you But there's a handful of times like you started walking in the wrong direction on this up This subway and I was trying to get your attention and I finally just had a yell your name Because you weren't you weren't stopping we're looking I was on a mission to leave that subway station I knew what direction I needed to go, but then I didn't apparently
21:42.625 --> 21:53.027
[SPEAKER_00]: I saw some meme about directions being and being directionally challenged and that why would that be relevant me using a map?
21:53.047 --> 21:55.188
[SPEAKER_01]: Why would that why would you bring that up to me?
21:55.288 --> 22:04.630
[SPEAKER_00]: But you know, it was like for people traffic was like give me a map sap and 20 feet in the wrong direction and I can get us anywhere we need to go.
22:06.820 --> 22:21.672
[SPEAKER_00]: And I thought that was very relevant for the 20 or so feet will go before you'll look down and go, oh, this way, actually, in my defense, my phone does not have that little arrow that everybody else has does.
22:22.753 --> 22:24.894
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I think Apple's fucking with you.
22:25.014 --> 22:28.657
[SPEAKER_01]: Because you've looked at it to try to figure out why not.
22:28.937 --> 22:32.400
[SPEAKER_01]: So for everybody's reference, if you're in Google Maps and you get walking direction
22:35.600 --> 22:40.821
[SPEAKER_01]: There's an arrow on everybody else's phone that tells you what direction you're going and facing and mine does not.
22:41.162 --> 22:43.382
[SPEAKER_01]: And it's often, my map is often upside down.
22:44.482 --> 22:47.443
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, then the settings all seemed normal.
22:47.603 --> 22:48.584
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't get it.
22:48.664 --> 22:54.045
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, remember, did you notice me yesterday we got out of the subway that I had to turn my phone around to figure out where we were.
22:54.065 --> 22:57.006
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's why, and it's frustrating.
22:58.366 --> 22:59.907
[SPEAKER_01]: But yeah, I am a little direction of challenge.
23:00.727 --> 23:03.308
[SPEAKER_01]: So no, I do not call you that in person.
23:03.368 --> 23:03.568
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
23:06.132 --> 23:20.377
[SPEAKER_01]: I, I get the question pretty much every week in my little A and A box about why I still use your nickname and I've mentioned it before, but like my Google results are fucked.
23:20.917 --> 23:22.718
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and I don't want that for you.
23:23.458 --> 23:24.078
[SPEAKER_00]: Appreciate that.
23:24.298 --> 23:26.439
[SPEAKER_01]: That's literally the that's literally the reason.
23:28.540 --> 23:31.781
[SPEAKER_01]: So everybody because like people will be like it's, you know,
23:32.789 --> 23:36.154
[SPEAKER_01]: You've been aiming for two years like a, it's like childish or whatever.
23:36.174 --> 23:39.579
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, actually, I have a very professional reason for why I'm doing this.
23:40.401 --> 23:42.284
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, it is an adult, it's a adultish.
23:42.344 --> 23:42.985
[SPEAKER_01]: It's a adultish.
23:43.225 --> 23:44.167
[SPEAKER_01]: It's very adultish.
23:44.227 --> 23:45.188
[SPEAKER_01]: The reason that I'm doing this.
23:46.433 --> 23:49.975
[SPEAKER_01]: But I am glad that I'm not doing it with a stupidest nickname, like Ink Master.
23:50.195 --> 23:57.379
[SPEAKER_00]: Ink Master, I mean, I would, I think we would have had a... We would have had a competition or something to change the... We would have had to change it.
23:57.399 --> 24:01.041
[SPEAKER_01]: Because Skyline is like, there are actually people that think it is your real name.
24:01.081 --> 24:05.043
[SPEAKER_01]: Like people that maybe don't listen to the pie that like only encounter my social media.
24:05.063 --> 24:06.084
[SPEAKER_01]: Because it could...
24:06.904 --> 24:09.707
[SPEAKER_01]: But that isn't the most outrageous name I've ever heard.
24:09.907 --> 24:10.087
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
24:10.827 --> 24:12.008
[SPEAKER_01]: Somebody could be named that.
24:12.249 --> 24:12.409
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
24:12.829 --> 24:13.389
[SPEAKER_01]: And probably is.
24:13.830 --> 24:17.533
[SPEAKER_01]: So yeah, people, people, a bunch of people asked how we kind of decide what shareable.
24:17.993 --> 24:19.794
[SPEAKER_01]: I think he made a good point that we don't.
24:20.575 --> 24:21.676
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I mean.
24:21.696 --> 24:23.577
[SPEAKER_01]: I can't even remember ever talking to you about.
24:24.178 --> 24:26.700
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it's usually pretty obvious.
24:26.720 --> 24:27.060
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
24:28.901 --> 24:30.683
[SPEAKER_00]: And I feel like it hasn't really come up.
24:30.703 --> 24:34.566
[SPEAKER_00]: But I feel like if it wasn't, it feels like a gray area, we would talk about it.
24:35.699 --> 24:38.802
[SPEAKER_00]: but nothing's been, everything's been very clear of like this.
24:40.283 --> 24:41.064
[SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely, no.
24:41.124 --> 24:42.645
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, this is obviously very personal.
24:42.705 --> 24:43.526
[SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely, yes.
24:43.626 --> 24:44.086
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
24:45.548 --> 24:47.029
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
24:47.149 --> 24:53.615
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm like, I can't even, I can think of things that we don't share, but I can't actually think of a conversation we ever had about them.
24:53.655 --> 24:58.599
[SPEAKER_01]: It just feels so obvious of things that are like deeply personal versus things that are not.
24:58.860 --> 24:59.100
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
25:00.534 --> 25:03.917
[SPEAKER_00]: And there might mean there's some to be said for sharing personal stuff.
25:04.497 --> 25:11.282
[SPEAKER_00]: And maybe it's like sharing some of that, but obfuscating the details are like making more generalizations or something.
25:11.322 --> 25:16.746
[SPEAKER_00]: But I think it's been fine not going down that road right now.
25:16.967 --> 25:17.207
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
25:17.607 --> 25:27.454
[SPEAKER_01]: Because that's one of the things I think that I struggle with is that I know that there is a lot of value in couples,
25:28.535 --> 25:52.358
[SPEAKER_01]: sharing like real shit that they're going through and like, you know, really personal things and people find a lot of value in that, right, they can either relate to it, they can feel less alone, they can maybe learn something about how that coupled to navigate it something, either for the good or for the bad, there is a lot of value in that and it is deeply personal on the internet forever.
25:54.194 --> 25:57.878
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's a monster of a decision to make.
25:58.298 --> 25:58.478
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
25:59.319 --> 26:00.100
[SPEAKER_01]: And you can't take it back.
26:00.120 --> 26:05.385
[SPEAKER_01]: You can't, like with each individual thing, like there are things that I have shared over the years.
26:06.286 --> 26:10.010
[SPEAKER_01]: And I'm like, oh, maybe wish I hadn't shared that thing.
26:10.451 --> 26:10.671
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
26:10.691 --> 26:12.292
[SPEAKER_01]: Because that's out there forever now.
26:12.413 --> 26:16.096
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, it's like some of it will go away, you know, but some of it won't.
26:16.537 --> 26:16.757
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
26:18.224 --> 26:18.404
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
26:18.985 --> 26:26.111
[SPEAKER_01]: So, yeah, I think it's been a, it's been an interesting journey kind of like figuring that out.
26:26.692 --> 26:26.892
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
26:28.053 --> 26:39.304
[SPEAKER_01]: What has, I'm curious, you're perspective on kind of like our growth as a couple like our timeline of, you know, when we met, we were in very different places in
26:44.562 --> 27:01.585
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't fully sing all of dated people, whatever, but like fully single for a solid four years and like even before that, never really considered myself somebody who, I'm not like, I wasn't like a serial monogamous, like I've had relationships, but I'd been like more single than that.
27:02.546 --> 27:05.486
[SPEAKER_01]: Completely opposite from where you were coming from at the time.
27:06.947 --> 27:13.468
[SPEAKER_01]: So I think it would have been really easy for us to then be on really different timelines.
27:14.789 --> 27:21.472
[SPEAKER_01]: in terms of like wanting to be in a relationship or wanting to move that relationship forward or you know, take steps or like do things.
27:21.532 --> 27:30.637
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm curious like as you look back to the beginning of our relationship and then kind of like as it progressed, how you kind of remember feeling about that.
27:32.217 --> 27:41.242
[SPEAKER_00]: I think because we came at it from such opposite sides
27:44.299 --> 27:53.024
[SPEAKER_00]: made us approach it the same way because I knew that you hadn't dated anyone seriously in a long time.
27:53.225 --> 27:53.485
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
27:53.605 --> 28:07.653
[SPEAKER_00]: So like it was going to take a while for us to navigate some of the things that you probably hadn't been used to in terms of a more serious relationship like staying over more often or shared expenses or traveling and things like that.
28:07.874 --> 28:09.515
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, even just like taking somebody else
28:12.440 --> 28:16.723
[SPEAKER_00]: had looked at it like I had been doing a lot of that stuff previously, but now I'm doing less of it.
28:16.743 --> 28:22.946
[SPEAKER_00]: So now I'm slowing back down to a place where I'm starting these things again.
28:23.046 --> 28:27.349
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's almost like we're looking at the same problem from different directions, but approaching it in the same way.
28:27.849 --> 28:29.230
[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't think about it like that.
28:29.772 --> 28:31.413
[SPEAKER_00]: At least that was my perspective kind of.
28:31.513 --> 28:31.813
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
28:31.973 --> 28:35.255
[SPEAKER_00]: Of like you wanted to go slow because you hadn't done this in a long time.
28:35.355 --> 28:41.958
[SPEAKER_00]: I wanted to go slow because I done too much a bit and I wanted to kind of come back to a baseline.
28:43.059 --> 28:44.559
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's to me it was the same.
28:45.860 --> 28:47.141
[SPEAKER_00]: But I don't know how you felt about it.
28:47.381 --> 28:55.145
[SPEAKER_01]: It's interesting that you term it as that we both wanted to go slow because I felt like
28:57.018 --> 29:03.621
[SPEAKER_01]: It was like the right piece for me, but I was worried at the time that you were gonna feel like it was too fast.
29:05.322 --> 29:09.163
[SPEAKER_01]: In terms of like being exclusive, let's say you're like moving things forward in that way.
29:09.664 --> 29:13.265
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I mean, I wasn't planning on meeting somebody the first day I moved here.
29:13.365 --> 29:14.346
[SPEAKER_01]: Weird, why?
29:14.726 --> 29:21.909
[SPEAKER_00]: But other than that, I think, you know, I think we approached everything it was a pretty good pace.
29:22.109 --> 29:22.389
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
29:23.010 --> 29:25.311
[SPEAKER_00]: And or like had conversations about it
29:26.788 --> 29:32.494
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's where we want to be does that make sense?
29:32.534 --> 29:33.455
[SPEAKER_00]: Should we talk about it?
29:33.475 --> 29:35.938
[SPEAKER_00]: Should we make adjustments like talking about living together?
29:36.098 --> 29:36.338
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
29:37.139 --> 29:43.006
[SPEAKER_00]: Where we talked about that months in advance or like does this make sense?
29:44.167 --> 29:44.988
[SPEAKER_00]: We had a date.
29:45.699 --> 29:49.741
[SPEAKER_00]: we wanted to move it up a little bit because of travel and so other things going on.
29:49.761 --> 30:07.267
[SPEAKER_00]: So like, I think I feel like everything that was like a big decision or like a big milestone, we had talked about enough that it wasn't, it didn't feel like a shock or a rush or a surprise because it was a known quantity for ever.
30:08.047 --> 30:08.327
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
30:10.348 --> 30:10.808
[SPEAKER_01]: I like that.
30:12.109 --> 30:14.810
[SPEAKER_01]: I felt like I felt that way to me too, but I've never heard you say it.
30:15.945 --> 30:20.046
[SPEAKER_01]: I think, I don't know if you know this, the last person.
30:20.086 --> 30:26.848
[SPEAKER_01]: So I was the one who brought up the, you know, I want to be exclusive, I want you to be my boyfriend and a thing.
30:26.908 --> 30:27.528
[SPEAKER_01]: You were.
30:27.648 --> 30:32.830
[SPEAKER_01]: I was that was I had done that two years prior to that.
30:32.890 --> 30:33.730
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know if you know this.
30:34.790 --> 30:39.732
[SPEAKER_01]: So in on New Year's Day of 2022,
30:41.729 --> 30:48.416
[SPEAKER_01]: I asked someone if he wanted to be exclusive, or like I said, I would like to be exclusive.
30:48.436 --> 30:49.377
[SPEAKER_01]: What do you think about that?
30:49.717 --> 30:51.038
[SPEAKER_01]: Which is exactly what does it do you?
30:52.620 --> 30:54.922
[SPEAKER_01]: And he said no, right?
30:55.943 --> 31:00.628
[SPEAKER_01]: And that person had somewhat recently ended in engagement.
31:02.014 --> 31:04.035
[SPEAKER_01]: And he said, no, like, I'm not ready for that.
31:04.995 --> 31:06.076
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm still getting old.
31:06.116 --> 31:08.017
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't think he said I'm still getting over it, but he was.
31:08.097 --> 31:10.858
[SPEAKER_01]: But I think he, you know, I'm not ready for that, right?
31:10.898 --> 31:13.539
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I'm still, you know, being single, et cetera.
31:14.160 --> 31:16.160
[SPEAKER_01]: And so that was two years prior.
31:17.821 --> 31:25.385
[SPEAKER_01]: But I was so exceedingly nervous to ask you because of that experience.
31:25.905 --> 31:26.145
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
31:32.005 --> 31:35.888
[SPEAKER_01]: We were on his couch, I could picture myself like so clearly in that moment.
31:36.689 --> 31:40.412
[SPEAKER_01]: I was so fucking sure he was gonna say, yeah, for sure, I'm on the same page.
31:40.692 --> 31:44.055
[SPEAKER_01]: I was blindsided that he said no.
31:44.295 --> 31:44.536
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
31:45.957 --> 31:52.843
[SPEAKER_01]: And it really, really shook my confidence in a way that I didn't even really talk about at the time.
31:55.822 --> 32:00.143
[SPEAKER_01]: And I kept dating him for a little while longer because he didn't say no when I want to break up.
32:00.243 --> 32:02.523
[SPEAKER_01]: He was just like, no, I'm not quite ready for that.
32:03.083 --> 32:05.084
[SPEAKER_01]: Like about a month after that, I was like, okay, I gotta be out.
32:05.304 --> 32:05.504
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
32:05.884 --> 32:06.564
[SPEAKER_01]: That's just too hard.
32:08.684 --> 32:11.245
[SPEAKER_01]: So that was in my head when I was like having that conversation with you.
32:11.265 --> 32:17.226
[SPEAKER_00]: You can see that being, uh, you're wrecking a little bit.
32:17.386 --> 32:22.047
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I mean, particularly because like that was also someone that had been in a very serious relationship.
32:26.102 --> 32:36.710
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and I think before that we had had conversations about like, I don't know how I feel with timelines and where I want to go and how serious how want to be and how long that's going to take.
32:36.810 --> 32:47.778
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's like, was kind of setting you up a little bit for the same potential problem, which is why I asked you what I did because I was like, Western, I can't do that again.
32:47.918 --> 32:53.402
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I think I mean, I think you asked it in that way almost instead of like being very sure and knowing the answer was more like,
32:55.667 --> 32:57.889
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't want to step waste our time like I like you.
32:57.929 --> 32:58.409
[SPEAKER_00]: You like me.
32:58.429 --> 32:58.929
[SPEAKER_00]: That's great.
33:00.050 --> 33:01.351
[SPEAKER_00]: This is where I want to go.
33:01.371 --> 33:02.652
[SPEAKER_00]: And this is what I want to be doing.
33:02.672 --> 33:03.792
[SPEAKER_00]: And like if you're on board that.
33:04.853 --> 33:05.053
[SPEAKER_00]: Great.
33:05.113 --> 33:05.974
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's let's do it.
33:06.294 --> 33:08.055
[SPEAKER_00]: If not, we should think about that.
33:09.116 --> 33:09.336
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
33:10.177 --> 33:11.718
[SPEAKER_01]: And you were on board.
33:12.959 --> 33:16.141
[SPEAKER_00]: And we were on a cool rooftop winery that is gone.
33:16.161 --> 33:17.342
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's gone.
33:17.362 --> 33:19.343
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, I didn't know that.
33:21.308 --> 33:21.828
[SPEAKER_01]: sad.
33:21.949 --> 33:26.112
[SPEAKER_00]: I was looking up the other day for like a fun outdoor thing.
33:26.552 --> 33:27.073
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
33:27.093 --> 33:28.274
[SPEAKER_00]: Like a frolic situation.
33:28.574 --> 33:29.955
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, I would have been fun to go back.
33:30.155 --> 33:30.555
[SPEAKER_00]: All right.
33:30.656 --> 33:33.518
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, no, can't believe they didn't let us know.
33:33.538 --> 33:34.158
[SPEAKER_01]: They were closing.
33:35.960 --> 33:38.262
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe they'll reopen or something else will reopen.
33:38.422 --> 33:44.086
[SPEAKER_01]: The whatever the fuck that place was called that we went the first time we met for the espresso martini's better never close.
33:45.407 --> 33:45.908
[SPEAKER_00]: The place what?
33:46.308 --> 33:47.909
[SPEAKER_01]: The place we went when we got espresso martini's
33:51.324 --> 33:54.926
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I was going to try to say there's so many places we've gotten as much of my team.
33:55.006 --> 33:57.808
[SPEAKER_00]: You're going to have to be a little more clear.
33:58.048 --> 34:01.210
[SPEAKER_01]: The first time they better not close.
34:01.230 --> 34:01.970
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think they will.
34:01.990 --> 34:03.991
[SPEAKER_00]: That's places been an institution forever.
34:04.131 --> 34:05.232
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we've been in a while.
34:05.252 --> 34:05.792
[SPEAKER_01]: We should go back.
34:05.852 --> 34:06.472
[SPEAKER_00]: We should go back.
34:06.492 --> 34:11.595
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, but yeah, so I think that's where my head was at when I asked you that.
34:12.476 --> 34:15.477
[SPEAKER_01]: But I remember I remember we had like a very
34:17.062 --> 34:26.945
[SPEAKER_01]: in-depth conversation about where you were at in your timeline and thinking about where we were headed on our three-month anniversary date.
34:27.105 --> 34:27.666
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?
34:29.226 --> 34:30.366
[SPEAKER_00]: A little bit, yeah.
34:30.527 --> 34:35.628
[SPEAKER_01]: We had like a state of the relationship if you will conversation.
34:35.648 --> 34:43.671
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's when I then felt more comfortable than I was like, okay, he is ready for what I'm ready for.
34:43.691 --> 34:44.911
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
34:47.272 --> 34:52.417
[SPEAKER_01]: Who's to say, if we will get, if we will both want to get there with the other person.
34:53.979 --> 34:58.324
[SPEAKER_01]: But I started to feel more comfortable in that conversation that it wasn't going to be because you were.
34:59.772 --> 35:05.137
[SPEAKER_01]: not ready for that if that makes sense like a cookie because you just don't want to do it anymore.
35:05.157 --> 35:06.978
[SPEAKER_01]: Was that could happen?
35:07.078 --> 35:07.278
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
35:07.839 --> 35:09.860
[SPEAKER_01]: And those, but I think they're still having it.
35:11.081 --> 35:12.363
[SPEAKER_01]: But more likely to happen.
35:12.383 --> 35:12.963
[SPEAKER_00]: Ideally, no.
35:13.243 --> 35:13.904
[SPEAKER_01]: Ideally, no.
35:14.284 --> 35:15.986
[SPEAKER_01]: But more likely to happen at three months.
35:16.426 --> 35:20.790
[SPEAKER_01]: Like that's like a three four months is like a pretty common drop-off for relationships.
35:21.570 --> 35:23.452
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and then we pass the two years.
35:23.512 --> 35:24.332
[SPEAKER_00]: So is two years?
35:24.352 --> 35:25.674
[SPEAKER_00]: No, we're the first.
35:25.694 --> 35:26.394
[SPEAKER_00]: So is two years?
35:26.775 --> 35:27.415
[SPEAKER_01]: How do you feel about
35:29.374 --> 35:50.004
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know because, but the time that I've known you, I've known you doing that, I think obviously us being together has changed the format and the content and a lot of things have shifted in our personal and professional lives that have made.
35:51.055 --> 35:53.417
[SPEAKER_00]: It I think different than what it was for you.
35:53.597 --> 35:53.857
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
35:54.317 --> 36:13.510
[SPEAKER_00]: And you know, it seems like maybe it's just not bringing you as much joy day to day anymore as it was in the past, which usually means like it's time to let something go or at least a piece of something go like you're still going to be doing podcast and you're still going to be doing content.
36:13.530 --> 36:15.251
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's not like that is going away.
36:15.291 --> 36:20.515
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just like you're reclaiming a little bit of time and space back for yourself.
36:21.961 --> 36:23.562
[SPEAKER_00]: to do other things that you want to do more of.
36:23.842 --> 36:27.264
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, um, which hopefully is a good thing.
36:27.284 --> 36:30.026
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm hoping it is, but you're right.
36:30.046 --> 36:33.188
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, it's it's been a big part of my identity for a long time.
36:33.388 --> 36:38.672
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, like that's the part not that I'm worried about.
36:39.292 --> 36:44.235
[SPEAKER_00]: Of like you losing that and you feeling like you lost a big part of it because you're again, you're still going to be doing stuff.
36:44.255 --> 36:46.657
[SPEAKER_00]: You're still doing content like, yeah, none of that's going away.
36:48.123 --> 36:58.987
[SPEAKER_00]: it's just a shift in how you're doing it and the frequency and the type of content and so that'll be different, but hopefully for you in a positive way.
36:59.227 --> 37:02.308
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I mean, I'm also worried about that.
37:02.328 --> 37:12.032
[SPEAKER_01]: We're worried in the low-case W if you will, like that not keeping me up at night, but like that is one of the reasons why it took me so long to make the decision.
37:12.412 --> 37:12.612
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
37:14.335 --> 37:15.976
[SPEAKER_01]: that I accidentally didn't tell you about it.
37:17.117 --> 37:18.357
[SPEAKER_00]: You did not tell me about it.
37:19.698 --> 37:20.839
[SPEAKER_01]: I told you I was considering it.
37:20.859 --> 37:22.680
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, you've known I've been considering it for quite a while.
37:22.900 --> 37:23.140
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
37:24.701 --> 37:27.322
[SPEAKER_00]: But then when you're like, oh, I'm going to record my last couple episodes.
37:27.342 --> 37:28.543
[SPEAKER_00]: I was like, were you talking about it?
37:28.563 --> 37:28.883
[SPEAKER_00]: I forgot.
37:29.003 --> 37:30.164
[SPEAKER_00]: I forgot to tell you.
37:32.345 --> 37:33.886
[SPEAKER_00]: They were like, yes, great.
37:33.906 --> 37:37.708
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, those things that like, we, is happened with my mom, too.
37:38.488 --> 37:40.809
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, you and I obviously talk all the time.
37:41.110 --> 37:41.650
[SPEAKER_01]: We lived there.
37:42.900 --> 37:52.462
[SPEAKER_01]: And so like, but what that means that you were often around when things happen or like when I make a decision or like when I did a news about something like or whatever to it.
37:53.742 --> 38:03.004
[SPEAKER_01]: There are things there aren't that many things that I have to like actively tell you because you were either there or you are about to come home or like whatever it is.
38:03.604 --> 38:11.626
[SPEAKER_01]: So there is some time was not like, oh, wait shit, I haven't mentioned this to him yet because it's all happened while he just happened to be at work or like wherever.
38:13.170 --> 38:19.997
[SPEAKER_01]: And then something like this happens when I'm like, oh, oops, I found out about it eventually you did find out about it eventually now you're here.
38:20.037 --> 38:20.517
[SPEAKER_01]: So thank you.
38:21.018 --> 38:23.841
[SPEAKER_01]: So do you think I'm making the right call.
38:25.062 --> 38:27.945
[SPEAKER_01]: You could say no no wrong answers.
38:28.285 --> 38:28.886
[SPEAKER_00]: I think so.
38:32.249 --> 38:33.210
[SPEAKER_00]: But I know that you'll.
38:35.100 --> 38:41.143
[SPEAKER_00]: not take that time back to relax and you'll fill it with some other thing that you're going to be doing.
38:41.924 --> 38:42.224
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
38:42.264 --> 38:44.906
[SPEAKER_01]: So, and hopefully that thing will bring me more joy.
38:44.966 --> 38:45.186
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
38:45.646 --> 38:46.066
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's try.
38:47.907 --> 38:51.549
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it's I've already filled.
38:51.649 --> 38:58.613
[SPEAKER_01]: I've already done that with like all because I'm like getting ahead of a lot of this content and stuff.
38:58.633 --> 39:01.555
[SPEAKER_01]: So like there's already, like right now usually,
39:04.191 --> 39:06.733
[SPEAKER_01]: like I've already encountered the like, oh, I don't have to do that.
39:07.094 --> 39:13.560
[SPEAKER_01]: Usually I am like researching topics and booking guests month out, roughly.
39:14.641 --> 39:18.524
[SPEAKER_01]: So like I haven't had to do that for the last month or so.
39:19.638 --> 39:20.559
[SPEAKER_01]: because it's ending.
39:20.599 --> 39:23.681
[SPEAKER_01]: So I had my final couple guests lined up.
39:24.202 --> 39:26.944
[SPEAKER_01]: I knew I was going to chat with Alana and Talia for last week's episode.
39:26.964 --> 39:28.365
[SPEAKER_01]: I knew I was going to chat with you today.
39:28.985 --> 39:30.527
[SPEAKER_01]: I knew I was going to do work in America.
39:30.607 --> 39:31.547
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I had all that scheduled.
39:32.468 --> 39:39.314
[SPEAKER_01]: And I needed the outlines for them and like whatever, but it's not the same as like researching for a guest or like researching for a topic.
39:39.434 --> 39:39.694
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
39:40.274 --> 39:41.916
[SPEAKER_01]: So first of all, it didn't take as much time.
39:41.936 --> 39:43.997
[SPEAKER_01]: And then second of all, I don't have the future stuff.
39:45.559 --> 39:46.700
[SPEAKER_01]: Like that's already been weird.
39:46.940 --> 39:47.180
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
39:47.560 --> 39:51.021
[SPEAKER_01]: Then I'm like, oh, no, I have to like, you know, oh, shoot.
39:51.041 --> 39:53.242
[SPEAKER_01]: I gotta, I gotta think about what I'm gonna do for the pod.
39:53.542 --> 39:54.342
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I'm in Morocco.
39:54.422 --> 39:54.883
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, no, I don't.
39:56.303 --> 39:56.683
[SPEAKER_00]: We are.
39:56.963 --> 39:57.204
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
39:58.744 --> 39:59.764
[SPEAKER_01]: But also relieving.
39:59.784 --> 40:01.645
[SPEAKER_01]: Because that is one of the things.
40:03.066 --> 40:05.647
[SPEAKER_01]: It takes up a lot of time to produce a public podcast.
40:05.707 --> 40:12.049
[SPEAKER_01]: Any podcast, but like especially the public one because there's end and there's, you know, there's just more production that goes into it.
40:13.422 --> 40:19.225
[SPEAKER_01]: And so I'm already seeing the the impact of ending it, but I've absolutely filled it with new things.
40:19.325 --> 40:19.525
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
40:21.886 --> 40:24.507
[SPEAKER_01]: We're doing a lot more with my content, which has been fun.
40:25.327 --> 40:26.248
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, that's great.
40:27.508 --> 40:29.329
[SPEAKER_00]: Seems like you like it more to which is nice.
40:29.389 --> 40:29.689
[SPEAKER_00]: I do.
40:30.129 --> 40:30.390
[SPEAKER_01]: I do.
40:31.670 --> 40:32.110
[SPEAKER_01]: It's been fun.
40:32.130 --> 40:32.791
[SPEAKER_01]: It's been good.
40:33.091 --> 40:35.852
[SPEAKER_01]: Last piece that somebody submitted.
40:37.523 --> 40:42.805
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, first of all, I asked a lot of Antalia last week for their best advice for my listeners.
40:43.706 --> 40:46.707
[SPEAKER_01]: And I'm curious what your best advice is for the listeners.
40:46.727 --> 40:47.747
[SPEAKER_01]: There's not to be about dating.
40:49.208 --> 40:49.808
[SPEAKER_00]: Be about anything.
40:50.789 --> 40:51.729
[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't even prep you for this.
40:51.769 --> 40:52.209
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm so sorry.
40:52.229 --> 40:53.190
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm putting you on the spot.
40:54.110 --> 40:54.450
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
40:54.590 --> 40:57.252
[SPEAKER_01]: Give them your best.
40:57.272 --> 41:02.634
[SPEAKER_00]: I say this just because I'm having to remind myself of this a little bit.
41:03.197 --> 41:03.577
[SPEAKER_00]: recently.
41:03.597 --> 41:08.079
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's like going tying in a little bit of like personal life stuff.
41:09.639 --> 41:22.843
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's kind of been my mantra for a long time and it tends to usually be the case, but like it may not seem like it right now, but everything's going to work out in the end.
41:23.863 --> 41:26.384
[SPEAKER_00]: It you might have missed an opportunity.
41:26.404 --> 41:27.284
[SPEAKER_00]: You might have lost a job.
41:27.304 --> 41:29.105
[SPEAKER_00]: You might have lost a relationship, but like that's
41:32.711 --> 41:46.899
[SPEAKER_00]: that's going to be better for you and for your life and for your path and just the more that I stress about those things the worse they are and the more I kind of pull back and just let the universe take the wheel so to speak.
41:49.020 --> 41:52.923
[SPEAKER_00]: It tends to start working itself out in a meaningful way.
41:54.143 --> 41:57.945
[SPEAKER_00]: So I don't know if that's good advice for everybody but it's what I've been trying to hold on to
42:04.280 --> 42:33.747
[SPEAKER_01]: what's I think like there's a there's a lot that like I can really relate to the feeling of wanting to like grip on to something so tight or like grip the wheel let's say so tight like steering in the direction that I want to go and that has never worked out well for me ever and things that I really really wanted and didn't get whether that was a relationship or a job or whatever
42:35.087 --> 42:38.689
[SPEAKER_01]: ultimately ended up turning into something different and better.
42:39.209 --> 42:48.274
[SPEAKER_01]: Like even the story that I just told about his name was the Rower, about the Rower, I say no, I don't want to be a boyfriend, yeah.
42:49.095 --> 43:02.282
[SPEAKER_01]: Like even if he had said yes and maybe then we had dated and whatever, like that, I already know based on my time with him, that relationship would have been not what I needed and this one is.
43:03.654 --> 43:09.839
[SPEAKER_01]: And I might, no, I might have been on a different path if that conversation had gone differently.
43:10.259 --> 43:10.459
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
43:12.541 --> 43:13.781
[SPEAKER_01]: And then I wouldn't be here.
43:14.042 --> 43:14.762
[SPEAKER_01]: And you wouldn't be here.
43:15.563 --> 43:16.383
[SPEAKER_01]: And that would be so sad.
43:16.403 --> 43:17.044
[SPEAKER_00]: I wouldn't be sad.
43:17.084 --> 43:18.024
[SPEAKER_01]: And Amy wouldn't be here.
43:18.044 --> 43:20.546
[SPEAKER_01]: She's so cute.
43:22.648 --> 43:31.034
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like every little choice or decision or outcome, lead you to where you should ultimately
43:33.992 --> 43:35.633
[SPEAKER_00]: and just to kind of trust the process a little bit.
43:35.894 --> 43:36.694
[SPEAKER_00]: It's hard.
43:37.415 --> 43:38.576
[SPEAKER_01]: Trust falls are hard, man.
43:39.537 --> 43:40.638
[SPEAKER_01]: Trust falls are real hard.
43:42.339 --> 43:43.760
[SPEAKER_01]: But I appreciate you being here.
43:43.780 --> 43:44.200
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
43:44.581 --> 43:47.944
[SPEAKER_01]: Chit chatting with me as we say farewell.
43:47.984 --> 43:50.586
[SPEAKER_01]: Although I am going to have you on the Patreon at some point eventually.
43:51.346 --> 43:51.847
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm around.
43:52.127 --> 43:52.487
[SPEAKER_01]: I know.
43:53.308 --> 43:53.908
[SPEAKER_01]: It's the best.
43:55.650 --> 43:56.431
[SPEAKER_01]: I love you.
43:57.191 --> 43:57.672
[SPEAKER_01]: Bye everyone.