Avoiding Tragedy. Embracing Serendipity, Making Moments Matter.

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Thank you for choosing W four WN Radio.
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Hello, and welcome to Fearless Fabulous You. I am your host,
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Melanie Young and Happy twenty twenty five at the beginning
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of the year. The show is airing January eighth, twenty
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twenty five, and I don't know about you, but we're
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all fresh and ready to have a new year that
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we don't know what's going to happen. But do we
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ever know what's going to happen? No. All we can
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do is try to control what's in front of us
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and live life with more intention. If you're joining me
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for the first time, welcome. If you're a regular follower
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and fan, thanks, I really appreciate it. I try to
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talk about life as we know it and face challenges
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head on, handle whatever comes along like this year, and
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live life on your terms. I'm going to tell you
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two stories. First of all, invite you to follow my
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new substack dot com near Melanie Young Melanie Fabulous. I
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am going to really this year try to achieve at
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least one of my resolutions. I've already done two. The
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first resolution is to do something new every month, something
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new and different. I already did that. I marched in
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a Martigaros parade on January sixth. The Joan of Arc
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Crew to Joan of Arc Parade kicked off the official
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festival see the New Orleans, and my husband David and
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I were volunteer foot soldiers to protect the Maiden Joe
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Novarc on her horse as we walk through the French
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quarter for a mile and a half. So not only
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did I protect the Maid of Orleans who helped protect
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New Orleans in the city of Orleons, but I also
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got a good walk in probably over ten thousand steps.
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Another resolution off there, do something new and different, walk
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ten thousand steps every day or try to. Yeah. The
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next one is to start a Subsack newsletter, which I
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have done, Melanie fabulous. I invite you to sign up
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for free before I start charging, and encourage you to
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comment and share, and then I'm going to write my book.
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I have a couple of titles and story lingules on
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along the way. I may just try to write all
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of them simultaneously in different segments. I don't know, but
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I'm gonna do it because I have the time. But
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before launching for into this about traditions and resolutions, I
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want to share a story with you because I had
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in New Year's very different. I try to do New
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Year's Day and New Year's Eve different every year because
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New Year's Day is my birthday, and after many years
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of bad dates, I decided to take matters into my
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own hands. The story goes like this. I don't believe
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in cheating unless it's death. You see. I was born
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on New Year's Day, fifteen minutes after the first baby
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of the year. My parents had to leave their fancy
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New Year's Eve party early due to my mother's water breaking,
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but I decided to make a late entrance at ten
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forty five am later that morning. Maybe that's why I'm
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always fifteen minutes late. My father said I was quote
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pearly engineered and badly accounted for that met no first
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Baby of the Year prizes and publicity and no text deductions.
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And he was a CPA, so life was all about
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tax deductions. So, after years of spending New Year's Eve
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with bad dates, attending anonymous parties with insipid sparkling wines,
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and hanging out with hungover friends the next day who
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really didn't care that it was my birthday, I decided
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at the age of thirty, so I had a lot
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of bad birthdays before that. I decided to take matters
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into my own hands and reclaim my special day on
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my terms, my way. Remember this show is all about
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living life on your terms. I vowed to spend New
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Year's with more adventure, somewhere new each year, a new experience,
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a new location, new people, just something new to set
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the tone and the year old year, set the tone
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for the new year and have a positive outlook. So
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since the age of thirty, over three decades now, I
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have celebrated New Year's even a different place in the world. Really,
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each experience is carefully documented in handwritten diary with my
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annual list of resolutions and a recap of the year.
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It's literally the story of my life in multiple diaries.
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You know, I've only repeated three locations for New Years,
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all for special reasons. The first was when I was
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diagnosed with breast cancer and I had to cancel a
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trip to Asia for my New Year's birthday because I
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had started chemotherapy. And even though I argued with my
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oncologist and said I'm available after January fifteenth, mind you,
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it was November when we had this conversation, she looked
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me straight in the eye and she said, Melanie, that's
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not how cancer treatment works. You are in my hands
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now and not on your terms, and you will start
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chemotherapy in December, and you will not go to Asia
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for your New Year's birthday. Tail between my legs, I
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canceled the trip and ended up at a friend's house
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in the Hampton's, where I had already spent in New
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Year's But she said, here are the keys to my house,
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go out there, because I was feeling rather low. Can
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you can imagine? So I spent a New Year's twice
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in the Hamptons. I gave my New Year's Birthday to
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my husband David, spending a repeat trip in Switzerland for
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his fiftieth birthday. That was my gift to him, giving
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him my special birthday. So we spent New Year's in Davos,
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Switzerland with friends, which I had already done and it
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was fine. We had a good time. We were in Zurich.
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That was a little different and I was happy to
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do it. This past New Year's I actually spent spent
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it celebrate in New Orleans. Now I had done this
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a couple of years ago. I think two thousand, I
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don't know, sixteen seventeen eighteen, of lost track, it's all
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in my diaries. But we did it differently. We went
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to a really nice dinner party with friends. No fireworks,
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see we just could hear them off the back patio
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of their uptown home in the Garden District. But it was,
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you know, a quiet dinner party. And then my birthday
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was at Commander's Palace. I took a walking out of
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the park. Was New New Orleans the way I love it.
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But we decided this year to spend New Year's again
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in New Orleans. But do it like you were like
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a tourist, like a real like I've never experienced New Orleans.
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New Orleans is our new home. We're trying really hard
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to embrace every season and feel planted here after living
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two years on the room, as you know if you
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follow us. And so we were in Jacksonville, Florida, visiting
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David's mother and older brother. We drove over to the Panhandle,
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across the Panhandle and landed back in New Orleans, and
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I got to tell you, it actually felt right. I
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wanted to come back home. It's been a long time
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since I called anything home. So we did that, and
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we decided to immerse ourselves in the zany decadence celebratory
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spirit of the French Quarter. At the stroke of midnight,
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I dressed in sequence head to toe. My husband David
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were his Texedo. We headed out with the good friends
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Who's on or a celebratory multi course dinner at Memmou,
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which is one of my favorite New Orleans restaurants. It's
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located at the edge of the French Quarter off Ramparts
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Street and serves really fabulous food with a French accent
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and has a terrific wineless and boy do we im vibe.
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We felt great. We brought a special bottle of lonju
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Champagne Grand One, the owner porter some burgundy we loved
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that restaurant. Sometime after eleven, probably around eleven twenty a pm,
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and we walked over to Jackson Square, the historical heart
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of the French Quarter, for the New Year's Eve countdown
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and fireworks extravaganza over the Mississippi River. It's really quite
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beautiful and they lower a Florida Lee much like you
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lower the ball in Times Square, and it was just wonderful.
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The crowd was festive, not unruly, I mean it can
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be in the French Quarter. The air was filled with
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energy and elation. We did the countdown police officers on
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foot and on horseback line in the streets. I felt
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so safe, and I walked and thanked many of them
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and wished them Happy New Year for their service. After
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the fireworks, we navigated the crowds on Bourbon Street and
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walked over to a place called the Bayou Club, where
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our friends Husan already had left, and we listened to
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a really terrific small Cajun ban and danced. In fact,
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at some point of the night, Shusan put a Cajun
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washboard on me and I was strumming a washboard. Wow,
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something else I've never done. Check it off the never
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done less play a washboard with a Cajun band. My
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husband David, as he always does, stood guard to watch
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my belongings so nothing disappeared. He is my protector whenever
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I decided to let my hair down, and I do
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like to let my hair down on New Year's Eve.
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Oh the things you do, you know. So around one
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forty five pm, I mean am so one forty five
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in the morning, we walked over to Bourbon and Canal.
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We debated whether to have a final nightcap at the
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hotel monoleone carousel bar, wonderful bar in a historic hotel,
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and it literally is it's a boar that goes around
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and around very slowly, but it goes around and around.
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We decided not to. Susan walked home. David and I
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decided to call an uber or check a cab, but boy,
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it was so expensive. What is it with search rates?
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It was like ninety dollars to go home and it's
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a thirty dollars cab, right, So being frugal, another resolution
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to be fabulous and frugal. I said, yeah, let's just
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wait it out. So it wasn't too cold of a night.
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But we walked over to the lobby of the Ritz
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Carlton Hotel on Canal Street, not far from Bourbon Street,
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and waited in their lower lobby until the taxi rates
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went down, and we just sat and did social media.
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There were other people doing the same thing. We scrolled
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our phones. We wish people Happy New Year. People were
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starting to wish me Happy Birthday. Around two twenty in
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the morning, we finally got an uber. Back to our hotel,
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I mean our home. Excuse me, back to our home,
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which is in Lakeview. It's a very quiet neighborhood off
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City Park, not too far from Lake Ponte Train. Many
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locals called sweet and suburban. You know what, that's okay?
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I kind of like sweet and suburban these days. We
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went to bed, went to sleep. Unbeknownst to us, at
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three point fifteen in the morning, a crazed man wearing
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military gear turned his white truck off Canal Street and
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inner Bourbon Street, accelerating full force with the intent to
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kill as many people as possible. Now we had just
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left this corner of Bourbon and Canal, mind you, forty
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five minutes earlier. In the end, thirty five people were
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injured and fourteen innocent people were dead, plus the perpetrator.
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Most were young revelers with their lives still ahead of them.
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The driver's name was shamsu Din Jabbar. He was an
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American born resident of Houston, Texas who had been radicalized
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and had posted some fairly radical videos. We don't know why.
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We don't know anything, and he's dead, so you know,
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the FBI is then the FBI's hands. But we don't
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know why he decided to come to New Orleans to
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mow down revelers on Bourbon Street on New Year's Eve.
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But obviously he wanted to make a big statement. It's
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all senseless and it's all tragic, and I had no
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idea that this had happened. Just forty five minutes after
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leaving the corner of Bourbon Canal, David and I were
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safely asleep in our bed and we were woken like
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really early, like crazy early seven thirty in the morning.
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Our phones started beeping and jumping and beeping and jumping,
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and we're like, who is calling us so early? And
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I kind of thought, in my you know, mumbly sleep, Wow,
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people really love me. They're calling to wish me happy birthday.
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I ignored everything and kind of reached over and put
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everything on silent. But then David's phone started going and
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I'm like, why are people calling David? It's not his birthday.
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And then we checked our texts and there were many
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saying are you okay? Because the last photo we posted
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from Bourbon Street was that just after two five in
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the morning, and everybody was like they could have been there. Well,
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fortunately we were safe in bed and we missed the situation,
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the terrible incident, by forty five minutes, maybe an hour.
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Reflecting on that tim being, I realized it was a
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pretty close call. We were deeply sickened by the act
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and sat by the killings, and thankfully it wasn't my time,
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and I hopefully have more trips around the sun to
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celebrate in different places of the world. But I thought
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long and hard about those fifty people young and old,
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celebrating the new year on Bourbon Street. I could have
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been one of them. It wasn't the first time I
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felt like I had cheated death. I could have been
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attending a meeting at the World Trade Center on September eleventh,
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two thousand and one. My client was the restaurant wind
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Is on the World. We were planning a huge anniversary
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and another client finds from Spain was planning an event
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at winds On the World to occur on October eighth,
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two thousand and one. Sadly, Windows On the World was
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destroyed and the terrorist attacks and many wonderful people died,
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and I went into action to do whatever I could
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to help with rest, you know, help support in any
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way I could. That was the first time I felt
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like I cheated death. I also felt like I cheated
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it during chemo therapy for breast cancer. I had a
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severe allergic reaction to a chemotherapy drug called pack of taxil.
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Literally I passed out. I went unconscious, although in the
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dark depths of my mind I kept saying inside, don't
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go to sleep, don't go to sleep, it's not your time.
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I was revived. I think people. I think they shot
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me up with a lot of betterer doll I really
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don't know. I was kind of When I finally came
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to I was like, WHOA, what happened. But the feeling
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that you've cheated death makes you value life even more.
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And that's the lesson. I have had too many friends,
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way too many friends in the past few months in
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their fifties and sixties drop dead and just suddenly and
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I'm like, wow, well they're like my age and younger. Wow,
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that could be me. You know. That's why I'm going
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to live twenty twenty five doing new things and living
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with more intention and not sweating the small stuff because
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the silly things you complain about and worry over no
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longer really seem important. You sip and save your foods
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and beverages without worrying about your long term health or weight.
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You take risks and try new things because if not now,
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when you don't hold back on your life or your emotions,
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you speak your mind because do you really care what
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other think about you? Other people think about you, not really,
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And at my age sixty six, I got to listen
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to me and what I think is right for me. Oh,
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I'll listen to my medical doctors because I do believe
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in doing that. But hopefully knock wood, they haven't told
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me anything that I already didn't know. So I woke
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up on January first, twenty twenty five, to a morning
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filled with brilliant sunshine and blue skies, and a day
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filled with friends and good food. I was grateful to
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be alive and for the ultimate birthday gift an abundant
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life to enjoy in good health and lucky timing. So
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take that to heart as you plan twenty twenty five.
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You don't know what lies ahead, and you don't know
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how long your life will be. But really it's not
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about the length of your life, but the quality of
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your life and how you live it every day. I
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know people who live there. My mother in law's ninety two,
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and she's very happy in her long life and doing
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fine for ninety two. My mother was eighty eight when
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she died. She was a bit bitter and depressed. I
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don't want to be that person. I have had friends
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who are living wonderful lives. They were cut down too soon.
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I don't know when my day will come, when my
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life will end, and I'm not going to think about
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it too much because I'm going to think about what
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I'm going to do after I finished recording show That's fun, right,
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because it's about having fun. Now, speaking of that, I'm
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going to switch gears a little bit and share with
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you a tradition that I love, just to kind of
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give you an essence of how I live my life
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and why I do funky, fun things I do believe
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in traditions. Like I said, I keep it New Year's Diary.
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I love my New Year's Diary. I'm very careful about
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protecting it. When we packed up our house, the New
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Year's Diaries were like Melanie's life in a box, don't
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touch super super special. So I'm going to tell you
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about another fun tradition I have that is also why
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I am here in New Orleans. And it really is
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a story about a food awakening and what really became
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the essence of me. I call this reconsider the Oyster
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because when I was eleven years old, my parents took
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me to New Orleans for a grand tour diny experience.
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It was my father's fortieth birthday celebration and my initiation
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into Creole cooking and the beauty of the Crescent City
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on the Mississippi River. And I just want to stop
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here and say, if you've never visited New Orleans, please come.
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Screw terrorist tacks, screw this and that, screw hurricanes, come
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to New Orleans, the beautiful city. Don't let bad things
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prevent you from doing good things and experiencing the world. Okay, lesson.
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So during this trip, we stayed at the Royal Sinesta
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and Bourbon Street. We had dinner at all the beautiful
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famous restaurants, Dinner at Galatoise one of my favorites, breakfast
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at Brannan's, Brunch at Commander's Palace by the way where
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David and I were married in the garden. We had
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Begnet's and Cafe Ole at Cafe Dumont, many other treats
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and meals. Throughout the entire time we were in New Orleans,
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I just loved every minute. My eyes were wide open
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like saucerers when I saw all the bars with the
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dancing girls, all the beautiful oak trees, the beautiful architecture.
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This trip honestly changed my life, and it changed my
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relationship with food and where I lived. Actually, after that
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trip to New Orleans, I went back to my hometown Chattanooga, Tennessee,
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and it felt rather mainstream and dull, kind of like
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a relationship you grow out of and long to leave. Right.
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I hope you don't have that, but we all have
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at some point, you say. Back in the nineteen sixties,
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when I was a young girl, fine dining, as I recalling,
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Chattanooga presented like two options which my parents patronized regularly.
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One was a family one restaurant called Fens, known for crispy,
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shaking baked style chickens served with a baked potato, a
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green vegetable, and a side salad with your choice of dressing.
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I liked the blue cheese, but my mom, who was
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always worried about weight hers and mine, wanted me to
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have vinagrette or dressing on the side. Now to this day,
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I'm trying to find the Fens fried chicken recipe. It's
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not really fried, it's more baked fried chicken, because I
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actually don't like fried food. I have fear of frying,
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probably because my mother and grandmother are always worried about
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their weight and therefore worried about my weight, which you're
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going to find. As I continued this little theme here,
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the other restaurant that we went to on Sunday nights
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the whole family was called Town and Country. It was
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a steak place steak of potato, and we had our
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own waitress named Chris. She had a whip of red
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hair piled high on her head and we were always like, hey, Chris,
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and I'm sure my grandfather tipped her generously. She really
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liked us at this restaurant. My mother always wanted me
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to order the filet mignon because the smaller portion in
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the less fetticat was better suited for young ladies to
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maintain our girlish figure. Now, mind you, I'm like not
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even a teenager yet, so I don't have a figure
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at all. But I was already being taught to eat
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like a lady and not eat fattening food because my
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mother hated bad people. I'm sorry to say that, but
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older in life, she really resented her weight problems and
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really resented people who couldn't manage their weight. It's kind
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of same anyway. I kind of liked the Hamburger steak personally,
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or the Salisbury steak, but I was told to order
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the flat mignon, and so I did. Elsewhere in Chattanooga,
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there were a lot of casual restaurants that served fried fish,
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usually catfish, shrimp, or fish sticks. Fish was rarely fresh caught,
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always overcooked. I hated the smell of the fried fish
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and the taste as well. And lo and behold, all
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that emphasis on eating skinny, eating to stay skinny really
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kind of enforced me into turning into someone with an
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eating disorder. For a while. As I started to develop
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and my body started to plump down and fill out,
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I stopped eating. Fortunately I outgrew that, fortunately, but it
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did happen. So that trip to New Orleans when I
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was around eleven, opened my palate immensely. It introduced me
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to fresh gulf fish, simmering and savory sauces with flavors
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i'd never taste. We always ordered it with fresh crab
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meat on top, and I still do that when I
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go out. You always can order, you know, your golf
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fish with fresh crab meat on top, and boy do
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I ever because fresh crab meat is kind of expensive
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at the supermarket. I learned to crab crabs, slip wile
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oysters and suck on crawfish. And when you eat a
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oil crawfish, it's crawfish season just started. They say, suck
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the hells and squeeze the tips. I know that sounds
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a little carnal, but that's what you do, and it's
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a lot of fun and they really are good spicy.
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I tasted oysters rockefella, a dish where oysters are coached
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on top with wonderful cream spinach. It's like one hundred
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and twenty five year old dish that was created at
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Antoine's restaurant, and boy is it good. Palm sou flee,
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These incredible puffed up potatoes, thin as like like they're
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like potato balloons, crunchy potato balloons. Gallatoise get the mcgallatowise
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is where they're the best Eggs sardau or breakfast at
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Brennan's and tenardslice steak with Marshan devine sauce at Commander's Palace.
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Oh it douns so good and I don't even eat
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meat anymore. Desserts and chattango were usually jello mulled. My
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mother and grandmother loved jello and felt that it was
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the right dessert for young ladies who wanted to maintain
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their girlish figures. Are you getting it? The men got
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cake and pie a la mode at one side of
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the table, and the women got the fruit cocktail or
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the jello or the jello with the fruit cocktail in it.
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I swear to God that's the truth. We had the
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men's desserts and the women's desserts. But in New Orleans
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I indulged in bread pudding with bourbon sauce, bananas, Foster
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Chocolate debersh Cake. It's like an amazing cake of umpteen
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layers of chocolate cake oozing with chocolate clam Oh so good.
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And then there's the mile high pie at the Pantcha
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Train Hotel. It's still there and I'm dying to take
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my husband David. It is so good. And even now
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they have a mile high pie. King Cake Kincake season
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storted January sixth, and the entire city is going nuts
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for kincake known as Gela Doi. It is. You go
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in a grocery store and there's just box boxes of
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kingcake and I'm having my first one tonight for dinner.
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But you know what, the one thing I ate that
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seduced me most of all oysters. That's right, oysters on
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the half shell. See, my father, who never really ate seafood,
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decided he liked oysters and he wanted to go to
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New Orleans and eat his age and oysters for his
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fortieth birthday. I don't know why, but he did. So
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we went to one of those amazing fish shack restaurants
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that were standing back then overlooking Lake Ponta Trains. Sadly,
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most of them were destroyed in Hurricane Katrina. But they
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were wonderful back then. And I watched him gulp each
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bivalve with unbridled pleasure, the juice running down his chin.
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And I tried a dozen myself, and it was messy
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and yummy and fun, and I love the cyllinic taste.
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My mother didn't have the oyster she cheered us on,
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but she tinted her hand and food off to everyone
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else because again she had to keep her wait in check.
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But you know what, when the desserts came around, she
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happily ate dessert. So oysters. You know, I have some
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friends who won't touch them. You know, everyoney's worried about coronavirus,
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not coronavirus, neurovirus, excuse me, neurovirus. There's people are afraid
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that oysters are not good for you. They may come
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from dirty waters. They're squeamish at the thought of an
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oyster slithering down their throat. But not me. I find
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the experience eating oysters sensuous. I like to say I
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prefer my oysters nude, you know, fried, steam, stewed, and nude.
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I choose nude that means adorn with nothing other than
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a squirt of lovin, or maybe a small dip of
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mignonette sauce. You know, you sometimes eating them the news
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fun too. I like oysters that way because I want
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to taste the salinity and the minerality, that kind of
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stony shellish taste, the essence of each oyster. The writer
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Ernest Hemingway, who I love, referred to the metallic taste
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of oysters as coppery in his book A Movable Feast,
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one of my favorite books of all time, A Movable Feast,
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Please read it. But I always like to compare that
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cool mouthfeel to when I was a baby and probably
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sucking on my Tiffany sterling baby rattle when I was teething. Yeah,
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I found that baby rattle packing up my box. In
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her seminal book, the author M. F. K. Fisher Mary
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Francis Kennedy Fisher as her full name was, wrote in
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her book Consider the Oyster, which documents what she calls
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the lowly, humble life of the oyster. She says her
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initiation into eating oysters was quote a strange, cold succulence.
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I totally get that. In fact, I love this book,
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and I totally recommend any book written by Mary Francis
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Kennedy Fisher aka m FK. Fisher. They are classics. They
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will make you change your whole outlook on food and
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00:27:24.440 --> 00:27:29.640
ex sensuous appeal. Let me tell you it was MFK.
470
00:27:29.759 --> 00:27:32.079
Fisher that made me go eat sardines in the South
471
00:27:32.079 --> 00:27:37.279
of France by myself. That's right. After reading her she
472
00:27:37.400 --> 00:27:41.920
wrote two Talents of Provence. Off I went, so, I'm
473
00:27:41.920 --> 00:27:46.000
with MFK. Fisher eating when oysters can deliver a carnal pleasure,
474
00:27:47.039 --> 00:27:52.799
especially when Champagne and Cavey are involved on the side.
475
00:27:53.359 --> 00:27:56.759
So I had a tradition. I don't know him anymore
476
00:27:56.799 --> 00:27:58.759
because I mean I still have the oyster reading tradition.
477
00:27:58.839 --> 00:28:00.960
But when I was dating man, meeting men, and I
478
00:28:01.039 --> 00:28:04.640
was considering them to enter my life, I had something
479
00:28:04.680 --> 00:28:08.000
called the four questions. Now, my father also had four questions,
480
00:28:08.039 --> 00:28:11.039
but his four questions and my four questions were very different.
481
00:28:14.119 --> 00:28:18.319
My four questions were one, how do you feel about
482
00:28:18.319 --> 00:28:24.160
eating raw oysters? Obviously, if he said they are gross,
483
00:28:24.359 --> 00:28:27.279
not my thing, he was not going to be in
484
00:28:27.319 --> 00:28:30.359
my life. You had to like raw oysters because that
485
00:28:30.400 --> 00:28:33.440
meant you were an adventurous eater. You had a resentsuous eater.
486
00:28:33.880 --> 00:28:37.880
You didn't get squeam as you tried things. Okay, if
487
00:28:37.920 --> 00:28:40.039
you must know the other three questions, and I bet
488
00:28:40.079 --> 00:28:44.799
you're wondering here they are. Well, I would say where
489
00:28:44.799 --> 00:28:46.440
do you like to travel? And do you have a
490
00:28:46.480 --> 00:28:52.000
passport bonus if you remember a frequent flyer clubs. The
491
00:28:52.039 --> 00:28:54.599
next was do you like small white dogs? Because I
492
00:28:54.680 --> 00:28:57.039
had a little white Maltese My mother had white Maltese.
493
00:28:57.079 --> 00:29:02.359
You had to like small white dogs my orb and last,
494
00:29:02.480 --> 00:29:05.559
and no surprising, what's your favorite color? And if you
495
00:29:05.640 --> 00:29:10.079
said purple, you were the one. Fortunately, my husband David
496
00:29:10.559 --> 00:29:14.400
answered all the four questions correctly. He didn't quite answer.
497
00:29:14.759 --> 00:29:17.240
He kind of answered my dad's four questions as well,
498
00:29:17.279 --> 00:29:21.720
which were, I'd go, Dad, I have a friend coming
499
00:29:21.720 --> 00:29:24.160
to dinner. That's kind of how I introduced David. I
500
00:29:24.200 --> 00:29:27.079
have a friend coming to dinner. My parents were in
501
00:29:27.119 --> 00:29:28.880
New York for the James Beared Words, and I never
502
00:29:28.920 --> 00:29:31.680
brought friends to dinner. But I said I have a friend.
503
00:29:32.880 --> 00:29:35.720
Dad would go a special friend. I said, yeah, and
504
00:29:35.799 --> 00:29:38.839
Dad would go man or woman. I was like, man
505
00:29:40.279 --> 00:29:43.319
Jewish or non Jewish. My dad was Jewish and David
506
00:29:43.400 --> 00:29:47.240
was I said, not Jewish. Sorry, he's from the South.
507
00:29:47.640 --> 00:29:51.920
Let's talk about race, black or white or brown or Asian.
508
00:29:52.000 --> 00:29:56.720
I said, he's Caucasian. Yeah, you're straight, He's straight, And
509
00:29:56.799 --> 00:30:00.000
Dad's like okay, And then forget to tell my mother. Now, mother,
510
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.920
there's four questions were completely different. Mothers Who's and she
511
00:30:02.960 --> 00:30:05.119
would ask him whenever I bring a guy home. Where
512
00:30:06.359 --> 00:30:09.200
where did you get your degree? What college should you attend?
513
00:30:09.240 --> 00:30:10.640
And what was your degree in? And do you have
514
00:30:10.680 --> 00:30:13.599
an advanced degree? What is your line of work and
515
00:30:13.599 --> 00:30:15.119
how long have you been in it? And what are your
516
00:30:15.119 --> 00:30:20.720
plans with your career? What arts do you support? Talk
517
00:30:20.799 --> 00:30:25.359
to me about the theater, music and dance. And lastly,
518
00:30:26.599 --> 00:30:29.039
do you like to travel because we all like to travel?
519
00:30:29.160 --> 00:30:32.920
And where do you go to spend your vacations? Very different,
520
00:30:34.359 --> 00:30:38.680
very different, four questions. Anyway, David passed My husband, David
521
00:30:38.720 --> 00:30:41.200
passed the four questions on my side. My dad's said
522
00:30:41.519 --> 00:30:45.759
did okay with mom? Not great? Anyway, After that trip
523
00:30:45.799 --> 00:30:48.839
to New Orleans, my dad never ate his agent oysters
524
00:30:48.839 --> 00:30:51.200
again and said he turned to hot Futch Sundays and
525
00:30:51.200 --> 00:30:53.680
banana splits until the day he died. He would eat
526
00:30:53.680 --> 00:30:56.200
them on his birthday. He would eat them in hospice.
527
00:30:56.319 --> 00:30:58.319
In fact, at the end of his life, that's all
528
00:30:58.359 --> 00:31:00.960
he wanted to eat was hot veudch side days, and
529
00:31:01.039 --> 00:31:03.000
he did until he died at the age of seventy
530
00:31:03.079 --> 00:31:07.440
nine on November two, two thousand and nine. But I
531
00:31:07.720 --> 00:31:10.880
continue the tradition eating my age and oysters and my
532
00:31:11.000 --> 00:31:14.920
January first birthday because I remember that great experience with
533
00:31:14.920 --> 00:31:19.119
my dad, and David likes to eat raw oysters too.
534
00:31:19.200 --> 00:31:22.680
We share that along with our passion for wine, we
535
00:31:22.720 --> 00:31:27.400
also enjoy our oysters raws, but also roasted, chargrilled and
536
00:31:27.480 --> 00:31:32.799
plumply floating in soups. Don't call it oyster su MFK fisher.
537
00:31:32.880 --> 00:31:36.839
My muse said, this is not that, and that is
538
00:31:36.880 --> 00:31:39.319
certainly not this. And at the same time, an oyster
539
00:31:39.440 --> 00:31:42.599
stew was not stewed, and although they are made of
540
00:31:42.640 --> 00:31:45.000
the same things and even cooked almost the same way,
541
00:31:46.240 --> 00:31:50.839
and oyster soup should never be called stew, not nor
542
00:31:50.960 --> 00:31:56.880
stew soup. So I this year started my January first
543
00:31:56.880 --> 00:32:00.880
birthday with the full intent of going the full three
544
00:32:01.359 --> 00:32:05.559
but we went to one of my favorite oyster happy hours,
545
00:32:05.680 --> 00:32:10.240
Superior Seafood. Oyster happy hours are awesome. It's like half
546
00:32:10.279 --> 00:32:12.839
priced oysters in this case, it was a dozen for
547
00:32:12.880 --> 00:32:17.960
fifteen dollars. They are so expensive. In other places. The
548
00:32:18.000 --> 00:32:21.400
oysters are so big there they're golf oysters. They were
549
00:32:21.440 --> 00:32:25.079
like super sized oysters. I could barely get through it.
550
00:32:25.279 --> 00:32:27.759
I got through a dozen, and then I said, you
551
00:32:27.759 --> 00:32:29.720
know what, I don't think I could do another dozen.
552
00:32:29.920 --> 00:32:34.240
I actually did a half a dozen. So I realized,
553
00:32:34.319 --> 00:32:36.160
as I grow older, eating madge and oysters is a
554
00:32:36.200 --> 00:32:39.119
little harder. Because it's now five and a half dozen.
555
00:32:40.279 --> 00:32:43.000
There's a lot of oysters and when sitting, so I'm
556
00:32:43.039 --> 00:32:46.599
doing an oyster interval eating. I'm eating my oysters and
557
00:32:46.680 --> 00:32:49.680
intervals a dozen here and a dozen there. I'll take
558
00:32:49.680 --> 00:32:53.279
the month of January. Fortunately, oysters are great in the
559
00:32:53.279 --> 00:32:57.240
winter months. I went to Custimentos, another place I love,
560
00:32:57.319 --> 00:33:00.759
and had the oyster soup. I had six up ones there.
561
00:33:01.920 --> 00:33:05.599
I'll keep eating my raw oysters, and I will do
562
00:33:05.640 --> 00:33:09.960
it with utter pleasure and abandonment because it's my special tradition.
563
00:33:11.640 --> 00:33:14.000
I never fear getting sick from an oyster, and notqwould
564
00:33:14.079 --> 00:33:17.920
never have thus far. I realize that the Center for
565
00:33:18.039 --> 00:33:21.960
Disease Control and Prevention cautions Americans over sixty five. My
566
00:33:22.079 --> 00:33:25.359
peers to refrain from eating raw oysters because some may
567
00:33:25.359 --> 00:33:30.440
contain a bacterium called Vibrio vulnifugus. They can cause severe
568
00:33:30.480 --> 00:33:33.759
illness even death for anyone with certain underlying medical conditions. Okay,
569
00:33:33.759 --> 00:33:36.079
that's the Debbie do Dinner message about raw oysters. But
570
00:33:36.119 --> 00:33:38.480
then you can also have Debbie Donner messages about eating
571
00:33:38.519 --> 00:33:41.799
other raw things like sushi, sashimi, crudo, and a lot
572
00:33:41.839 --> 00:33:45.799
of raw vegetables and other things that may be planted
573
00:33:45.839 --> 00:33:48.119
with fecal matter, because what is going on with our
574
00:33:48.119 --> 00:33:52.720
food system anyway? But I can't worry about that. I
575
00:33:52.759 --> 00:33:56.759
can't worry about that. I can't worry about really policing
576
00:33:56.799 --> 00:34:00.519
when I eat and drink too much, because you know what,
577
00:34:00.720 --> 00:34:04.240
I don't want my last meal to be salad, That's right.
578
00:34:04.680 --> 00:34:06.440
I don't want my last meal to just be a
579
00:34:06.440 --> 00:34:09.519
big fat salad. I want to go out with a bang,
580
00:34:09.559 --> 00:34:12.960
eating wonderful things like oysters and kevy or and mashed potatoes,
581
00:34:13.039 --> 00:34:15.719
and maybe mashed potatoes and French fries. I just want
582
00:34:15.760 --> 00:34:18.679
to like enjoy my food and not be fearful of it.
583
00:34:19.519 --> 00:34:21.679
And that's the way I feel about life. I don't
584
00:34:21.679 --> 00:34:24.599
want to be fearful about anything. Yeah, there could be
585
00:34:24.639 --> 00:34:27.519
another terrorist attack. Yeah I could drop dead in the street.
586
00:34:27.840 --> 00:34:31.039
Yeah my cancer can come back. Yeah the world could
587
00:34:31.039 --> 00:34:33.800
come to an end. But you know what, I'm not
588
00:34:33.800 --> 00:34:36.000
going to worry about it. I'm just gonna worry about
589
00:34:36.039 --> 00:34:38.559
what am I doing today and how am I enjoying
590
00:34:38.559 --> 00:34:41.639
my day and give myself maybe three things I used
591
00:34:41.639 --> 00:34:46.840
to be five to accomplish. So oysters are kind of
592
00:34:46.880 --> 00:34:50.840
like a symbolism, but learning to eat without fear and
593
00:34:50.920 --> 00:34:55.400
with raw pleasure, to be adventures and experimental and just
594
00:34:55.440 --> 00:35:00.519
to say I want to have fun. And while I
595
00:35:00.599 --> 00:35:04.480
may reconsider the number of oysters I consume for my
596
00:35:04.519 --> 00:35:09.320
next several birthdays as we get into six dozen, I
597
00:35:09.320 --> 00:35:12.480
won't give up my tradition. I'll just do it with
598
00:35:12.639 --> 00:35:19.079
more a more time, and more pleasure and allow myself
599
00:35:19.599 --> 00:35:24.360
the time and the pleasure to savor the moment without
600
00:35:24.519 --> 00:35:27.559
feeling pushed or pressure to do it all at once.
601
00:35:28.119 --> 00:35:29.880
And we should do that with life. We should not
602
00:35:29.920 --> 00:35:33.400
try to get it all done. You may have a
603
00:35:33.400 --> 00:35:36.440
lot of resolutions you want to knock off your list,
604
00:35:36.840 --> 00:35:42.480
your to do list may be too big. Hey, sit out,
605
00:35:42.679 --> 00:35:46.679
enjoy the pace. Life is not a race. It's about
606
00:35:46.719 --> 00:35:49.599
your pace. I got out of the rat race when
607
00:35:49.599 --> 00:35:52.199
I left New York. I was in the rat race
608
00:35:52.440 --> 00:35:57.199
for a long time. Eventually I got sick because I
609
00:35:57.239 --> 00:36:01.280
forgot to take care of myself. So I am all
610
00:36:01.280 --> 00:36:03.400
about taking care of myself, but not to the point
611
00:36:03.400 --> 00:36:05.079
where I'm fearful about what I eat and do this
612
00:36:05.199 --> 00:36:09.360
and that and that. You know, not me. I maybe
613
00:36:09.519 --> 00:36:13.639
will eat less. I'll eat until I'm hungry and not more.
614
00:36:14.760 --> 00:36:17.480
I will drink in moderation because these days I'm feeling
615
00:36:17.559 --> 00:36:23.639
that alcohol and me love my wine and love one cocktail,
616
00:36:23.719 --> 00:36:26.920
but I can't do a lot. Now. I know my
617
00:36:27.000 --> 00:36:30.760
metabolism is different. I know my husband's metabolism is different.
618
00:36:31.280 --> 00:36:37.000
So we're learning to repace, reconsider, rewire, and rethink, but
619
00:36:37.079 --> 00:36:43.239
not give up. Never give up, just reconsider, repace, and rethink.
620
00:36:43.920 --> 00:36:49.119
So as you start twenty twenty five, give that some
621
00:36:49.639 --> 00:36:56.760
food for thought, and don't overthink things. Just let things
622
00:36:56.840 --> 00:37:04.199
come as they will. Embrace serendipity. Embrace serendipity, Embrace the
623
00:37:04.239 --> 00:37:11.519
sensuous side of life, and savor every moment. I'm Melanie Young.
624
00:37:12.159 --> 00:37:16.400
This is another edition of Fearless Fabulous Shoe. I invite
625
00:37:16.440 --> 00:37:19.880
you to follow me on Melanie Fabulous on Instagram, follow
626
00:37:19.920 --> 00:37:25.000
my substack Melanie Fabulous or Melanie Young and sign up.
627
00:37:25.280 --> 00:37:31.519
Please recommend others join me for another episode of Fearless
628
00:37:31.519 --> 00:37:35.760
Fabulous Shoe and always remember you have the choice to
629
00:37:35.840 --> 00:37:40.119
live life on your terms, not other people's. Choose fearless
630
00:37:40.119 --> 00:37:59.119
and fabulous. Thank you,