WEBVTT
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Welcome to a special bonus episode of the Fast
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Forward podcast, powered by FutureWorld. My name
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is Nomvola Omarowai. This week's episode is called
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The Power Pause. The Power Pause is about the
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conscious act of creating space before moving
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forward to gain clarity, perspective, and calm
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in a world that constantly asks us to move faster.
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This episode takes a quick pause from our usual
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programming, a moment to breathe, reflect, and
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recharge. This concept began as a Women's Month
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initiative at Future World. During this initiative,
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we published an insights piece and hosted an
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event where Ms. Klemawisa shared her story and
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reflections on embracing the power pause, a reminder
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of the strength, wisdom, and influence that can
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be found in stillness. In this episode, we share
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the power pose. Our hope is that it stirs something
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in you too, in your own way. You can also read
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our article linked in the show notes. Let's take
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a moment and press pause. Hi everyone. I hope
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you're all enjoying your meal. I'm sure you were
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thinking, oh my goodness, I just finished that
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meze. Is this now seriously another dish in front
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of me? So as you're settling in, we also thought
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we'll give you some food for thought. So we have
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Claire Mawisa here today, and it's my great honor
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to introduce her. So I've heard some people asking,
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who is this lady? So if she looks familiar, you
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might know her from some... TV programs, and
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of course, Carte Blanche, which is my favorite.
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So today she's not here to let us know that it's
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the end of the weekend. But she's going to tell
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a bit more about her story, so I'm not going
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to make a long, lengthy intro. And Claire, we
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love having you. Thanks for being here. What
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if it is the end of the weekend? I'm not here
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to ask any tough questions, ladies. Good morning,
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everyone. And thank you so much. I mean, you
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guys look gorgeous. Prettier than the flowers
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on the table. I'd like to just thank Future World
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for inviting me here today to this gorgeous brunch.
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And I don't know if they told you, this area,
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this space that we're in, this is the very first
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event that they're having with you. Isn't that
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fabulous? I thought that was absolutely fabulous.
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That's why the serving staff are panicking a
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little bit and making sure you guys have a great
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time. Anyway, I was invited by Future World to
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come and share my story on how I learned a lesson.
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And I know that everyone sitting here today has
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their own story how they learned the same lesson.
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So for me, 7 plus 2 is 9. For you, 6 plus 3 is
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9. 5 plus 4 is 9. But we all get there in the
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end. And my intention in sharing my story today
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is hopefully it will trigger a memory on what
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your story was in learning the lesson. Are we
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together? And so hopefully at the end of my little
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chat and after I've shared my story, you are
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more than welcome to ask me a few questions.
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And I'd also love to hear some of your stories
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on how you learned the same lesson, what your
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8 plus 1 is. As Sue Ann so kindly said, yes,
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you might recognize me from Carte Blanche, but
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in prehistoric times when dinosaurs still roamed
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the planet, I used to model a very long time
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ago. And that's how I got into TV presenting.
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And most people know me from there, and I joined
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TV presenting in 1999. But what people don't
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know is that I started my radio career at the
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same time that I started my TV career. People
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don't know that. I joined YFM in 1999, like a
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month after I started TV presenting, and I knew
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nothing about radio. And I joined the breakfast
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team at YFM in 1999 as the entertainment celebrity
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news girl. Because at that time, we didn't have
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social media, and the Kardashians didn't Kardashian
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yet, so it was very important for me to tell
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you what was going on. And let me tell you, I
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was on only for like two minutes a day, but it
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was the best two minutes. of my life because
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as soon as I was in that studio, in that environment,
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I fell in love. It was the magic of broadcasting.
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I was absolutely enthralled by the music, the
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personalities, the sports stars, the personalities
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that were on air. Just being able to impact people
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immediately, I was captivated. And I loved radio
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so much more than I loved TV. And if I was at
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the bottom of the food chain, which I was in
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the radio world, The person who is at the top
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of the food chain is somebody we call a program
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manager. Now, the program manager in a radio
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station is a person that orchestrates all of
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those things that are happening, all those moving
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parts. They really are top of the food chain
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head honcho. And so I love my time there. But
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you see, there were some negative comments that
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came while I was there. I remember there was
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a time just after a staff meeting, we were standing
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and hanging around. I was such an eager beaver.
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And one of the very famous presenters said, he
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was standing right next to me, and he said, they
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hire anyone nowadays, they even get like former
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models to come on air. Can you believe? And I
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stood there, my spine turned to jelly, and I
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tried to act very tough. And there were whisperings
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that really, they get anyone, because who is
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she anyway? and hurt my feelings absolutely,
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but it didn't deter me. I loved radio and I thought
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to myself, you know, I'm going to learn everything
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there is to know about this place. I'm going
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to know everything. And that's how my career
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in radio began. And I left YFM and I went to
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Metro FM. And I was at Metro FM for a few years
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and I learned everything at Metro FM. I learned
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how to press all the buttons on the desk. I did
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graveyard shifts. I read the news when nobody
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could do it. I did every single thing and I had
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a very supportive program manager who allowed
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me to learn every aspect of the business. And
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I went on to work and produce content for lots
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of other radio stations, Radio 2000, OFM, Elko
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FM, Heart FM. And I really was finding my place
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in the radio world. And I was carving my career.
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And I was loving every moment. And then in 2010,
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I got an incredible phone call. My dream radio
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station called me. And they were headhunting
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me. I know. I know. I felt like that girl. And
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it was Kaya FM. And at that time, Kaya FM resonated
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with me and I wanted to work there so badly and
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I didn't know the way in. And who knew? Lo and
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behold, I get a phone call saying, Claire, we
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want you to come produce the biggest radio show
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on our station. And that was such an incredible
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honor. And so began my career at Kaya FM. And
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I worked harder. in my time there than I'd ever
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worked in my entire life. I was at the office
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seven days a week. I was at my desk at 4 .30
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a .m. My first team meeting in the morning was
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at 5 a .m. I left after sunset. I was there around
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the clock because that's what radio is. And I
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had an incredible program manager. who was my
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boss. I still believe he's one of the best program
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managers ever in South Africa. His name is Neil.
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And Neil took me under his wing, and he really
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helped me. And I grew in leaps and bounds. I'd
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never worked so hard in my life, but I was also
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being rewarded. My salary doubled. Hello. And
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also, when you work really hard in an organization,
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they reward you by giving you more responsibility.
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And I started moving up, and hey, life was looking
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great. And I remember I was in a management meeting,
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and I was sitting next to Neil, and Neil made
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the announcement, and he said he was going to
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table it for ExCo, and he says, I'm going to
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leave this place in about a year or two years'
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time, and I want everyone to know that I want
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Claire to be the program manager at Kaya FM when
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I leave. Dream job, dream place, like life was
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aligning. And that was so wonderful, such a validation
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from somebody that I admired so much. And what
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people didn't know, though, was that even though
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from the outside my career trajectory was looking
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incredible and I was gaining the respect of my
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peers in the industry, what they didn't see was
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the stress. I'd never in my life been under so
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much stress because I wanted to do my job well.
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And when I was done with my job, I would help
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you with yours. And if you were done, I would
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find something else to do. And I was just trying
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to be everything to everyone to show them that
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I belong because hello, imposter syndrome. And
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so I was under tremendous stress. I met a friend
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I didn't like called Anxiety. And I was anxious.
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I was hospitalized twice because I had panic
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attacks. And nobody at work knew the amount of
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stress I was going under. Also, because I was
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at the station 24 -7, I was missing so much.
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Friends' birthdays, bridal showers, baby showers,
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weddings, girls' weekends away, family vacations.
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I was missing all of that because I had prioritized
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this thing that I was chasing. I had now 25 years
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in the game, and I was about to touch the dream.
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And so everyone just needed to understand I was
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sacrificing so much to get that. I remember I
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would drive in, and I'd park in my parking bay
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in the mornings, and I'd sit in the car for like
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five minutes, just breathing, just so that I
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was ready to go upstairs and put out the fires
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I needed to put out. And I remember I was sitting
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at my desk one day at 6 .30, 7 .30 in the evening.
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And once again, Neil and I were the only ones
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in the building. And I could see his desk from
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where I was sitting. And I looked at him and
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I watched that picture. And the picture was that
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he had his cell phone in his shoulder like this.
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He's on the phone. He had his landline on top
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like this. He had an unlit cigarette in his mouth,
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typing with one finger on a laptop, swearing
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at someone. And I watched that and I was like...
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Is that what I'm chasing? Are those the forthcoming
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attractions? The next day, I handed in my resignation.
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Everyone was shocked, just like you are. No one
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was more shocked than me because I was this close
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to touching the dream. I was this close. And
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I don't even really know what overcame me. I
00:11:47.279 --> 00:11:51.419
don't even know what motivated me. Death. I don't
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even know, but I handed in my resignation and
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I served my 30 -day notice and that was a daze
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for me. I don't even really remember what happened.
00:11:58.600 --> 00:12:01.080
And I remember my final day at Kaya FM was on
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a Friday. I drove home down Nyansmuts in tears.
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I could hardly see the road because I was sobbing.
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I could feel the physical ache. It felt like
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a breakup. Because I'd worked so long, so hard
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for this moment, and now I'm walking away, and
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I was starting to regret it. What had I just
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done? Was this a mistake? That was a Friday,
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Saturday, Sunday. Monday came around. There was
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no meeting to go to. There was no phone call
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to answer. There was no fire to put out, and
00:12:34.500 --> 00:12:37.879
it got really quiet really quickly. And suddenly,
00:12:37.879 --> 00:12:41.519
for the first time in a very long time, it was
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quiet. And the days got quieter and quieter.
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And I don't want you to think that quiet means
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peace. Because it was quiet and I had space to
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think. But I was unsure. Life was uncertain.
00:12:56.779 --> 00:12:59.820
I didn't know what the next step was. I was doubting
00:12:59.820 --> 00:13:02.100
myself. Had I done the right thing? Oh my goodness,
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what's happening? Anxiety on a thousand. And
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I had lots and lots of questions. But if anyone
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here goes to therapy, they will know that it's
00:13:12.120 --> 00:13:13.980
so uncomfortable when your therapist calls you
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out on your nonsense. I needed to call myself
00:13:16.940 --> 00:13:20.600
out on my own nonsense. What had I done? What
00:13:20.600 --> 00:13:23.759
should I own in how I got to that situation?
00:13:24.460 --> 00:13:28.799
I couldn't blame the business. What do I own?
00:13:29.679 --> 00:13:33.460
And I realized on reflection, I had like three
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big nuggets that stuck out to me. Number one,
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I was doing all of that just to prove a point.
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I was working so hard, I was dedicating my life
00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:45.179
just to prove a point to that guy who I no longer
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even see at 1999 YFM after the staff meeting.
00:13:50.419 --> 00:13:52.720
And I was doing it to prove it to myself, right?
00:13:52.960 --> 00:13:56.279
That I could do it. That I wanted to shut everyone
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down and I didn't want anyone to doubt my credentials.
00:13:58.879 --> 00:14:01.580
That's why I was motivated. The second thing
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I realized also was that I was driven by ego.
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It was such an egocentric driven life. I wanted
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the title. I wanted to be the first black female
00:14:14.059 --> 00:14:16.399
program manager on a commercial radio station.
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I wanted it. Because I knew it would impress
00:14:20.220 --> 00:14:24.559
people. The title was more seductive than Jason
00:14:24.559 --> 00:14:30.100
Momoa. I wanted the business card that said,
00:14:30.179 --> 00:14:34.720
Claire Mawisa, Head of Content, Kaya FM. I wanted
00:14:34.720 --> 00:14:36.740
the corner office. I wanted the parking bay with
00:14:36.740 --> 00:14:41.960
my name on it. I wanted it. But what looked good
00:14:41.960 --> 00:14:44.860
on the outside felt like rubbish on the inside.
00:14:45.080 --> 00:14:48.220
I was chasing it for what? For who? For people
00:14:48.220 --> 00:14:52.340
who didn't even know or care. And the final thing
00:14:52.340 --> 00:14:56.000
I realized during that time was that I didn't
00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:58.279
feel like I had a bit of a purpose anymore. I
00:14:58.279 --> 00:15:00.899
was just moving on autopilot, just doing what
00:15:00.899 --> 00:15:05.559
needed to be done. And so during that time when
00:15:05.559 --> 00:15:08.570
I didn't really have anything to do, People kept
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on asking, what are you going to do next? What
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job are you going to do? And I had no answers
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for people. I was going through a dark time of
00:15:16.370 --> 00:15:21.950
reflection, admitting and owning my role in it.
00:15:22.470 --> 00:15:28.629
Very uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. I termed
00:15:28.629 --> 00:15:30.970
that time in my life fun employment, but there
00:15:30.970 --> 00:15:33.490
was no fun about it. I was telling everyone,
00:15:33.549 --> 00:15:37.389
I'm fun employed, I'm fun employed. And it was
00:15:37.389 --> 00:15:39.009
around that time that I thought to myself, I
00:15:39.009 --> 00:15:40.730
should actually go out to coffee with people,
00:15:40.830 --> 00:15:44.389
do things, see what I enjoy, because I had forgotten
00:15:44.389 --> 00:15:48.549
myself in the process. I didn't even know what
00:15:48.549 --> 00:15:52.649
I liked to do when I had free time. And suddenly
00:15:52.649 --> 00:15:55.850
I had hours and hours, 24 hours, 7 days a week
00:15:55.850 --> 00:15:59.649
of free time. And so I wrote articles for newspapers,
00:15:59.750 --> 00:16:02.629
and I stood in for presenters on radio shows,
00:16:02.730 --> 00:16:05.820
I did podcasts. And I remember one day, and I
00:16:05.820 --> 00:16:07.500
met people for coffee, and I remember one day
00:16:07.500 --> 00:16:09.559
I was leaving an office park and I was in a parking
00:16:09.559 --> 00:16:12.799
lot, walking towards my car, and I recognized
00:16:12.799 --> 00:16:15.240
a gentleman that I'd worked with about 20 years
00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:21.039
ago in TV. His name was George. And I saw George,
00:16:21.039 --> 00:16:24.460
and George saw me. He was like, Claire! And I
00:16:24.460 --> 00:16:28.419
was surprised he even remembered me. And George
00:16:28.419 --> 00:16:30.200
says, oh, it's so good to see you. I haven't
00:16:30.200 --> 00:16:33.590
seen you in so long. Let's do coffee. And we
00:16:33.590 --> 00:16:37.789
know in Joburg, that means nothing. You know
00:16:37.789 --> 00:16:39.769
what I mean? Everyone is always doing coffee.
00:16:40.490 --> 00:16:43.169
And so I'm like, internally, I rolled my eyes.
00:16:43.250 --> 00:16:45.250
I'm like, yeah, we should do coffee. And he says,
00:16:45.269 --> 00:16:46.769
give me your number, give me your number. And
00:16:46.769 --> 00:16:49.429
I gave him my number, and we parted ways. Lo
00:16:49.429 --> 00:16:52.029
and behold, the next morning, his PA calls me.
00:16:52.149 --> 00:16:55.909
Hi, Claire, this is Marie, Georgia's PA. I just
00:16:55.909 --> 00:16:57.929
wanted to know whether you're available to do
00:16:57.929 --> 00:17:00.529
coffee day after tomorrow. Are you available?
00:17:02.619 --> 00:17:05.960
Yes, I'm available. I was shocked. I was shocked.
00:17:07.279 --> 00:17:10.660
Day after tomorrow comes, I go to George in his
00:17:10.660 --> 00:17:13.519
office. Very impressive man, very impressive
00:17:13.519 --> 00:17:15.299
building. And I go and I meet George for this
00:17:15.299 --> 00:17:17.700
coffee. And he sits behind his desk and he says,
00:17:17.759 --> 00:17:20.480
Claire, so tell me, I haven't seen you in about
00:17:20.480 --> 00:17:24.140
20 years. What have you been up to? And I told
00:17:24.140 --> 00:17:26.839
George the story, the exact same story that I
00:17:26.839 --> 00:17:31.019
just told you about my radio career. 1999, YFM,
00:17:31.039 --> 00:17:35.660
Metro. All of it. Kaya FM, you know, all of it.
00:17:36.059 --> 00:17:38.619
And I even told him how I resigned the whole
00:17:38.619 --> 00:17:41.200
shebang. And I said, you are meeting me, George,
00:17:41.299 --> 00:17:45.559
now in my fun employment. It's been a few months
00:17:45.559 --> 00:17:51.619
and I haven't done anything. But I was still
00:17:51.619 --> 00:17:55.500
a different person than when I had quit. I was
00:17:55.500 --> 00:17:59.940
clearer on my boundaries. I was braver in admitting
00:17:59.940 --> 00:18:05.009
when I was wrong. my values had aligned. And
00:18:05.009 --> 00:18:07.069
I told him all of this, just like I'm telling
00:18:07.069 --> 00:18:09.869
it to you now. And George sat there in his desk
00:18:09.869 --> 00:18:12.509
and he looked at me and he says, Claire, I love
00:18:12.509 --> 00:18:14.670
that story so much. I think you're the perfect
00:18:14.670 --> 00:18:19.190
person to join our team. That was George Mazarrakis,
00:18:19.190 --> 00:18:22.490
executive producer of Carte Blanche. And that's
00:18:22.490 --> 00:18:26.349
how I joined Carte Blanche. And that was now
00:18:26.349 --> 00:18:31.619
10 years ago. Can you believe? And I tell people
00:18:31.619 --> 00:18:33.819
all the time that one of the greatest things
00:18:33.819 --> 00:18:37.539
is that when carte blanche, possibly the greatest
00:18:37.539 --> 00:18:39.799
opportunity that had come my way, by the time
00:18:39.799 --> 00:18:45.259
it came, it came with me ready. It came with
00:18:45.259 --> 00:18:52.400
me ready. I'd used that time, my little break,
00:18:52.500 --> 00:18:56.779
I'd used that time to heal, to grow, to learn
00:18:56.779 --> 00:18:59.819
the lessons. How did I get there? How do I not
00:18:59.819 --> 00:19:02.900
get there anymore? And I've learned in the last
00:19:02.900 --> 00:19:04.980
10 years, one of the greatest things is that
00:19:04.980 --> 00:19:09.299
you need to learn how to carve out time for yourself,
00:19:09.339 --> 00:19:13.700
to check in with yourself, to find out if you
00:19:13.700 --> 00:19:16.619
are still on purpose. Is this still working for
00:19:16.619 --> 00:19:19.799
me? Why is this no longer working for me? Does
00:19:19.799 --> 00:19:22.259
this feel good? What else should I be doing?
00:19:22.420 --> 00:19:26.220
What is my real purpose? What's going on? Because
00:19:26.220 --> 00:19:28.700
you can actually only do that when you get still
00:19:28.700 --> 00:19:33.180
and quiet and you're away from people and the
00:19:33.180 --> 00:19:37.500
noise and the influences of the world. Because
00:19:37.500 --> 00:19:40.160
oftentimes we do things because they look good,
00:19:40.279 --> 00:19:44.980
not necessarily because they feel good. And taking
00:19:44.980 --> 00:19:46.859
that time for different people means different
00:19:46.859 --> 00:19:51.000
things. For me, sometimes it's 30 minutes bubble
00:19:51.000 --> 00:19:53.799
bath. Sometimes it's a trip to Cape Town for
00:19:53.799 --> 00:19:58.319
the weekend. When my money is right, it will
00:19:58.319 --> 00:20:03.420
be six months in Positano. Right? But the break
00:20:03.420 --> 00:20:06.799
needs to happen on a regular basis because it
00:20:06.799 --> 00:20:09.039
allows you to realign, it allows you to move
00:20:09.039 --> 00:20:12.200
with clarity. And I know it feels so counterintuitive
00:20:12.200 --> 00:20:14.980
to say you become more productive after you've
00:20:14.980 --> 00:20:18.180
taken a break, but it's true. You're clearer,
00:20:18.339 --> 00:20:21.019
you're laser -focused on your mission. You know
00:20:21.019 --> 00:20:23.119
what matters, you know what doesn't matter. It's
00:20:23.119 --> 00:20:27.440
so easy to move away from the noise. once you've
00:20:27.440 --> 00:20:32.519
come back and you've realigned. I don't want
00:20:32.519 --> 00:20:34.519
anyone to quit their job. It's very reckless.
00:20:34.960 --> 00:20:38.279
It's what I did, but I know that I've told people,
00:20:38.579 --> 00:20:40.420
I know they're going to say, I listened to Claire
00:20:40.420 --> 00:20:43.460
and she quit her job and she had a great opportunity.
00:20:43.500 --> 00:20:46.519
That's not the point. The point is to understand,
00:20:46.640 --> 00:20:49.940
ladies, that I think especially because we're
00:20:49.940 --> 00:20:53.500
women. Sometimes we feel beholden to do more
00:20:53.500 --> 00:20:55.720
than we are supposed to do. We extend ourselves
00:20:55.720 --> 00:20:58.200
further than we're supposed to do. And we feel
00:20:58.200 --> 00:21:01.000
that it's indulgent to take a break. It's not
00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:05.680
indulgent, it's crucial. Because I took a break
00:21:05.680 --> 00:21:11.599
voluntarily. I believe it in my bones that had
00:21:11.599 --> 00:21:15.059
I not done it willingly, voluntarily, proactively,
00:21:15.279 --> 00:21:18.220
the break would have happened to me and it would
00:21:18.220 --> 00:21:20.160
have been a medical emergency. I can promise
00:21:20.160 --> 00:21:23.890
you that. So either you choose to take the pause
00:21:23.890 --> 00:21:27.109
or the pause will rain down on you like bricks.
00:21:28.789 --> 00:21:31.750
Sometimes it's a great, wonderful escape. Sometimes
00:21:31.750 --> 00:21:34.750
it's a tough moment where you are forged in the
00:21:34.750 --> 00:21:43.309
fire. I'm here just to hopefully remind you and
00:21:43.309 --> 00:21:46.529
to urge you to take that break because it was
00:21:46.529 --> 00:21:50.740
during that time that I learned the power. of
00:21:50.740 --> 00:21:52.819
the pause. Thank you so much.
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.180
Welcome to a special bonus episode of the Fast
00:00:03.180 --> 00:00:06.820
Forward podcast, powered by FutureWorld. My name
00:00:06.820 --> 00:00:11.259
is Nomvola Omarowai. This week's episode is called
00:00:11.259 --> 00:00:14.660
The Power Pause. The Power Pause is about the
00:00:14.660 --> 00:00:17.480
conscious act of creating space before moving
00:00:17.480 --> 00:00:21.920
forward to gain clarity, perspective, and calm
00:00:21.920 --> 00:00:25.140
in a world that constantly asks us to move faster.
00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.379
This episode takes a quick pause from our usual
00:00:29.379 --> 00:00:33.240
programming, a moment to breathe, reflect, and
00:00:33.240 --> 00:00:36.960
recharge. This concept began as a Women's Month
00:00:36.960 --> 00:00:40.320
initiative at Future World. During this initiative,
00:00:40.439 --> 00:00:42.719
we published an insights piece and hosted an
00:00:42.719 --> 00:00:45.560
event where Ms. Klemawisa shared her story and
00:00:45.560 --> 00:00:49.280
reflections on embracing the power pause, a reminder
00:00:49.280 --> 00:00:52.679
of the strength, wisdom, and influence that can
00:00:52.679 --> 00:00:57.140
be found in stillness. In this episode, we share
00:00:57.140 --> 00:01:01.159
the power pose. Our hope is that it stirs something
00:01:01.159 --> 00:01:05.000
in you too, in your own way. You can also read
00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.939
our article linked in the show notes. Let's take
00:01:07.939 --> 00:01:21.819
a moment and press pause. Hi everyone. I hope
00:01:21.819 --> 00:01:25.810
you're all enjoying your meal. I'm sure you were
00:01:25.810 --> 00:01:28.769
thinking, oh my goodness, I just finished that
00:01:28.769 --> 00:01:31.489
meze. Is this now seriously another dish in front
00:01:31.489 --> 00:01:35.849
of me? So as you're settling in, we also thought
00:01:35.849 --> 00:01:39.510
we'll give you some food for thought. So we have
00:01:39.510 --> 00:01:41.969
Claire Mawisa here today, and it's my great honor
00:01:41.969 --> 00:01:46.310
to introduce her. So I've heard some people asking,
00:01:46.510 --> 00:01:51.109
who is this lady? So if she looks familiar, you
00:01:51.109 --> 00:01:55.280
might know her from some... TV programs, and
00:01:55.280 --> 00:01:58.900
of course, Carte Blanche, which is my favorite.
00:01:59.400 --> 00:02:06.239
So today she's not here to let us know that it's
00:02:06.239 --> 00:02:12.439
the end of the weekend. But she's going to tell
00:02:12.439 --> 00:02:14.379
a bit more about her story, so I'm not going
00:02:14.379 --> 00:02:18.620
to make a long, lengthy intro. And Claire, we
00:02:18.620 --> 00:02:26.969
love having you. Thanks for being here. What
00:02:26.969 --> 00:02:31.469
if it is the end of the weekend? I'm not here
00:02:31.469 --> 00:02:33.629
to ask any tough questions, ladies. Good morning,
00:02:33.669 --> 00:02:36.389
everyone. And thank you so much. I mean, you
00:02:36.389 --> 00:02:38.449
guys look gorgeous. Prettier than the flowers
00:02:38.449 --> 00:02:41.729
on the table. I'd like to just thank Future World
00:02:41.729 --> 00:02:44.490
for inviting me here today to this gorgeous brunch.
00:02:44.669 --> 00:02:47.490
And I don't know if they told you, this area,
00:02:47.750 --> 00:02:50.969
this space that we're in, this is the very first
00:02:50.969 --> 00:02:55.169
event that they're having with you. Isn't that
00:02:55.169 --> 00:02:56.870
fabulous? I thought that was absolutely fabulous.
00:02:57.629 --> 00:03:00.110
That's why the serving staff are panicking a
00:03:00.110 --> 00:03:01.569
little bit and making sure you guys have a great
00:03:01.569 --> 00:03:06.689
time. Anyway, I was invited by Future World to
00:03:06.689 --> 00:03:09.669
come and share my story on how I learned a lesson.
00:03:10.490 --> 00:03:13.469
And I know that everyone sitting here today has
00:03:13.469 --> 00:03:15.889
their own story how they learned the same lesson.
00:03:16.250 --> 00:03:19.789
So for me, 7 plus 2 is 9. For you, 6 plus 3 is
00:03:19.789 --> 00:03:23.289
9. 5 plus 4 is 9. But we all get there in the
00:03:23.289 --> 00:03:26.919
end. And my intention in sharing my story today
00:03:26.919 --> 00:03:31.039
is hopefully it will trigger a memory on what
00:03:31.039 --> 00:03:35.199
your story was in learning the lesson. Are we
00:03:35.199 --> 00:03:38.740
together? And so hopefully at the end of my little
00:03:38.740 --> 00:03:40.639
chat and after I've shared my story, you are
00:03:40.639 --> 00:03:42.259
more than welcome to ask me a few questions.
00:03:42.319 --> 00:03:45.539
And I'd also love to hear some of your stories
00:03:45.539 --> 00:03:48.060
on how you learned the same lesson, what your
00:03:48.060 --> 00:03:51.740
8 plus 1 is. As Sue Ann so kindly said, yes,
00:03:51.840 --> 00:03:54.719
you might recognize me from Carte Blanche, but
00:03:54.719 --> 00:03:57.639
in prehistoric times when dinosaurs still roamed
00:03:57.639 --> 00:04:01.039
the planet, I used to model a very long time
00:04:01.039 --> 00:04:03.860
ago. And that's how I got into TV presenting.
00:04:04.620 --> 00:04:07.479
And most people know me from there, and I joined
00:04:07.479 --> 00:04:10.520
TV presenting in 1999. But what people don't
00:04:10.520 --> 00:04:13.699
know is that I started my radio career at the
00:04:13.699 --> 00:04:16.439
same time that I started my TV career. People
00:04:16.439 --> 00:04:20.699
don't know that. I joined YFM in 1999, like a
00:04:20.699 --> 00:04:23.600
month after I started TV presenting, and I knew
00:04:23.600 --> 00:04:26.199
nothing about radio. And I joined the breakfast
00:04:26.199 --> 00:04:30.839
team at YFM in 1999 as the entertainment celebrity
00:04:30.839 --> 00:04:35.040
news girl. Because at that time, we didn't have
00:04:35.040 --> 00:04:37.779
social media, and the Kardashians didn't Kardashian
00:04:37.779 --> 00:04:40.620
yet, so it was very important for me to tell
00:04:40.620 --> 00:04:42.600
you what was going on. And let me tell you, I
00:04:42.600 --> 00:04:46.180
was on only for like two minutes a day, but it
00:04:46.180 --> 00:04:49.160
was the best two minutes. of my life because
00:04:49.160 --> 00:04:52.339
as soon as I was in that studio, in that environment,
00:04:52.480 --> 00:04:55.379
I fell in love. It was the magic of broadcasting.
00:04:55.720 --> 00:04:58.459
I was absolutely enthralled by the music, the
00:04:58.459 --> 00:05:02.199
personalities, the sports stars, the personalities
00:05:02.199 --> 00:05:05.519
that were on air. Just being able to impact people
00:05:05.519 --> 00:05:09.180
immediately, I was captivated. And I loved radio
00:05:09.180 --> 00:05:12.480
so much more than I loved TV. And if I was at
00:05:12.480 --> 00:05:14.920
the bottom of the food chain, which I was in
00:05:14.920 --> 00:05:17.600
the radio world, The person who is at the top
00:05:17.600 --> 00:05:19.540
of the food chain is somebody we call a program
00:05:19.540 --> 00:05:22.399
manager. Now, the program manager in a radio
00:05:22.399 --> 00:05:24.639
station is a person that orchestrates all of
00:05:24.639 --> 00:05:26.300
those things that are happening, all those moving
00:05:26.300 --> 00:05:29.040
parts. They really are top of the food chain
00:05:29.040 --> 00:05:34.740
head honcho. And so I love my time there. But
00:05:34.740 --> 00:05:37.420
you see, there were some negative comments that
00:05:37.420 --> 00:05:39.920
came while I was there. I remember there was
00:05:39.920 --> 00:05:43.899
a time just after a staff meeting, we were standing
00:05:43.899 --> 00:05:46.899
and hanging around. I was such an eager beaver.
00:05:47.439 --> 00:05:51.759
And one of the very famous presenters said, he
00:05:51.759 --> 00:05:55.060
was standing right next to me, and he said, they
00:05:55.060 --> 00:05:57.259
hire anyone nowadays, they even get like former
00:05:57.259 --> 00:06:03.540
models to come on air. Can you believe? And I
00:06:03.540 --> 00:06:07.040
stood there, my spine turned to jelly, and I
00:06:07.040 --> 00:06:10.540
tried to act very tough. And there were whisperings
00:06:10.540 --> 00:06:13.420
that really, they get anyone, because who is
00:06:13.420 --> 00:06:17.629
she anyway? and hurt my feelings absolutely,
00:06:17.949 --> 00:06:20.750
but it didn't deter me. I loved radio and I thought
00:06:20.750 --> 00:06:22.430
to myself, you know, I'm going to learn everything
00:06:22.430 --> 00:06:23.990
there is to know about this place. I'm going
00:06:23.990 --> 00:06:27.029
to know everything. And that's how my career
00:06:27.029 --> 00:06:31.889
in radio began. And I left YFM and I went to
00:06:31.889 --> 00:06:35.079
Metro FM. And I was at Metro FM for a few years
00:06:35.079 --> 00:06:36.980
and I learned everything at Metro FM. I learned
00:06:36.980 --> 00:06:39.480
how to press all the buttons on the desk. I did
00:06:39.480 --> 00:06:41.939
graveyard shifts. I read the news when nobody
00:06:41.939 --> 00:06:44.720
could do it. I did every single thing and I had
00:06:44.720 --> 00:06:47.100
a very supportive program manager who allowed
00:06:47.100 --> 00:06:50.040
me to learn every aspect of the business. And
00:06:50.040 --> 00:06:53.060
I went on to work and produce content for lots
00:06:53.060 --> 00:06:56.279
of other radio stations, Radio 2000, OFM, Elko
00:06:56.279 --> 00:06:59.779
FM, Heart FM. And I really was finding my place
00:06:59.779 --> 00:07:02.720
in the radio world. And I was carving my career.
00:07:02.939 --> 00:07:06.439
And I was loving every moment. And then in 2010,
00:07:06.699 --> 00:07:10.759
I got an incredible phone call. My dream radio
00:07:10.759 --> 00:07:15.279
station called me. And they were headhunting
00:07:15.279 --> 00:07:21.569
me. I know. I know. I felt like that girl. And
00:07:21.569 --> 00:07:25.449
it was Kaya FM. And at that time, Kaya FM resonated
00:07:25.449 --> 00:07:27.769
with me and I wanted to work there so badly and
00:07:27.769 --> 00:07:30.449
I didn't know the way in. And who knew? Lo and
00:07:30.449 --> 00:07:32.449
behold, I get a phone call saying, Claire, we
00:07:32.449 --> 00:07:34.449
want you to come produce the biggest radio show
00:07:34.449 --> 00:07:40.870
on our station. And that was such an incredible
00:07:40.870 --> 00:07:44.930
honor. And so began my career at Kaya FM. And
00:07:44.930 --> 00:07:50.089
I worked harder. in my time there than I'd ever
00:07:50.089 --> 00:07:53.870
worked in my entire life. I was at the office
00:07:53.870 --> 00:07:57.389
seven days a week. I was at my desk at 4 .30
00:07:57.389 --> 00:08:00.029
a .m. My first team meeting in the morning was
00:08:00.029 --> 00:08:05.069
at 5 a .m. I left after sunset. I was there around
00:08:05.069 --> 00:08:10.149
the clock because that's what radio is. And I
00:08:10.149 --> 00:08:14.149
had an incredible program manager. who was my
00:08:14.149 --> 00:08:16.410
boss. I still believe he's one of the best program
00:08:16.410 --> 00:08:18.509
managers ever in South Africa. His name is Neil.
00:08:18.930 --> 00:08:21.649
And Neil took me under his wing, and he really
00:08:21.649 --> 00:08:25.110
helped me. And I grew in leaps and bounds. I'd
00:08:25.110 --> 00:08:27.370
never worked so hard in my life, but I was also
00:08:27.370 --> 00:08:32.490
being rewarded. My salary doubled. Hello. And
00:08:32.490 --> 00:08:34.570
also, when you work really hard in an organization,
00:08:34.809 --> 00:08:36.629
they reward you by giving you more responsibility.
00:08:38.110 --> 00:08:41.850
And I started moving up, and hey, life was looking
00:08:41.850 --> 00:08:46.629
great. And I remember I was in a management meeting,
00:08:46.750 --> 00:08:48.590
and I was sitting next to Neil, and Neil made
00:08:48.590 --> 00:08:50.590
the announcement, and he said he was going to
00:08:50.590 --> 00:08:53.090
table it for ExCo, and he says, I'm going to
00:08:53.090 --> 00:08:54.830
leave this place in about a year or two years'
00:08:54.889 --> 00:08:59.070
time, and I want everyone to know that I want
00:08:59.070 --> 00:09:01.830
Claire to be the program manager at Kaya FM when
00:09:01.830 --> 00:09:09.070
I leave. Dream job, dream place, like life was
00:09:09.070 --> 00:09:15.200
aligning. And that was so wonderful, such a validation
00:09:15.200 --> 00:09:19.320
from somebody that I admired so much. And what
00:09:19.320 --> 00:09:22.139
people didn't know, though, was that even though
00:09:22.139 --> 00:09:24.740
from the outside my career trajectory was looking
00:09:24.740 --> 00:09:27.440
incredible and I was gaining the respect of my
00:09:27.440 --> 00:09:32.820
peers in the industry, what they didn't see was
00:09:32.820 --> 00:09:37.320
the stress. I'd never in my life been under so
00:09:37.320 --> 00:09:40.299
much stress because I wanted to do my job well.
00:09:40.419 --> 00:09:42.500
And when I was done with my job, I would help
00:09:42.500 --> 00:09:44.779
you with yours. And if you were done, I would
00:09:44.779 --> 00:09:47.220
find something else to do. And I was just trying
00:09:47.220 --> 00:09:50.419
to be everything to everyone to show them that
00:09:50.419 --> 00:09:54.960
I belong because hello, imposter syndrome. And
00:09:54.960 --> 00:09:59.799
so I was under tremendous stress. I met a friend
00:09:59.799 --> 00:10:03.129
I didn't like called Anxiety. And I was anxious.
00:10:03.190 --> 00:10:05.370
I was hospitalized twice because I had panic
00:10:05.370 --> 00:10:08.850
attacks. And nobody at work knew the amount of
00:10:08.850 --> 00:10:11.250
stress I was going under. Also, because I was
00:10:11.250 --> 00:10:14.049
at the station 24 -7, I was missing so much.
00:10:14.590 --> 00:10:17.149
Friends' birthdays, bridal showers, baby showers,
00:10:17.450 --> 00:10:21.610
weddings, girls' weekends away, family vacations.
00:10:21.629 --> 00:10:24.429
I was missing all of that because I had prioritized
00:10:24.429 --> 00:10:28.480
this thing that I was chasing. I had now 25 years
00:10:28.480 --> 00:10:31.120
in the game, and I was about to touch the dream.
00:10:31.519 --> 00:10:34.519
And so everyone just needed to understand I was
00:10:34.519 --> 00:10:40.179
sacrificing so much to get that. I remember I
00:10:40.179 --> 00:10:42.600
would drive in, and I'd park in my parking bay
00:10:42.600 --> 00:10:44.440
in the mornings, and I'd sit in the car for like
00:10:44.440 --> 00:10:49.279
five minutes, just breathing, just so that I
00:10:49.279 --> 00:10:51.620
was ready to go upstairs and put out the fires
00:10:51.620 --> 00:10:55.100
I needed to put out. And I remember I was sitting
00:10:55.100 --> 00:10:57.480
at my desk one day at 6 .30, 7 .30 in the evening.
00:10:57.559 --> 00:10:59.399
And once again, Neil and I were the only ones
00:10:59.399 --> 00:11:02.139
in the building. And I could see his desk from
00:11:02.139 --> 00:11:04.980
where I was sitting. And I looked at him and
00:11:04.980 --> 00:11:08.100
I watched that picture. And the picture was that
00:11:08.100 --> 00:11:10.500
he had his cell phone in his shoulder like this.
00:11:10.559 --> 00:11:12.940
He's on the phone. He had his landline on top
00:11:12.940 --> 00:11:15.259
like this. He had an unlit cigarette in his mouth,
00:11:15.360 --> 00:11:17.700
typing with one finger on a laptop, swearing
00:11:17.700 --> 00:11:21.559
at someone. And I watched that and I was like...
00:11:22.480 --> 00:11:26.740
Is that what I'm chasing? Are those the forthcoming
00:11:26.740 --> 00:11:32.559
attractions? The next day, I handed in my resignation.
00:11:35.019 --> 00:11:38.799
Everyone was shocked, just like you are. No one
00:11:38.799 --> 00:11:41.940
was more shocked than me because I was this close
00:11:41.940 --> 00:11:45.080
to touching the dream. I was this close. And
00:11:45.080 --> 00:11:47.279
I don't even really know what overcame me. I
00:11:47.279 --> 00:11:51.419
don't even know what motivated me. Death. I don't
00:11:51.419 --> 00:11:54.279
even know, but I handed in my resignation and
00:11:54.279 --> 00:11:56.919
I served my 30 -day notice and that was a daze
00:11:56.919 --> 00:11:58.419
for me. I don't even really remember what happened.
00:11:58.600 --> 00:12:01.080
And I remember my final day at Kaya FM was on
00:12:01.080 --> 00:12:04.480
a Friday. I drove home down Nyansmuts in tears.
00:12:04.620 --> 00:12:06.840
I could hardly see the road because I was sobbing.
00:12:06.899 --> 00:12:10.539
I could feel the physical ache. It felt like
00:12:10.539 --> 00:12:14.960
a breakup. Because I'd worked so long, so hard
00:12:14.960 --> 00:12:17.940
for this moment, and now I'm walking away, and
00:12:17.940 --> 00:12:20.480
I was starting to regret it. What had I just
00:12:20.480 --> 00:12:25.639
done? Was this a mistake? That was a Friday,
00:12:25.679 --> 00:12:28.500
Saturday, Sunday. Monday came around. There was
00:12:28.500 --> 00:12:31.620
no meeting to go to. There was no phone call
00:12:31.620 --> 00:12:34.500
to answer. There was no fire to put out, and
00:12:34.500 --> 00:12:37.879
it got really quiet really quickly. And suddenly,
00:12:37.879 --> 00:12:41.519
for the first time in a very long time, it was
00:12:41.519 --> 00:12:44.940
quiet. And the days got quieter and quieter.
00:12:45.159 --> 00:12:47.340
And I don't want you to think that quiet means
00:12:47.340 --> 00:12:52.539
peace. Because it was quiet and I had space to
00:12:52.539 --> 00:12:56.539
think. But I was unsure. Life was uncertain.
00:12:56.779 --> 00:12:59.820
I didn't know what the next step was. I was doubting
00:12:59.820 --> 00:13:02.100
myself. Had I done the right thing? Oh my goodness,
00:13:02.240 --> 00:13:06.360
what's happening? Anxiety on a thousand. And
00:13:06.360 --> 00:13:09.840
I had lots and lots of questions. But if anyone
00:13:09.840 --> 00:13:12.120
here goes to therapy, they will know that it's
00:13:12.120 --> 00:13:13.980
so uncomfortable when your therapist calls you
00:13:13.980 --> 00:13:16.940
out on your nonsense. I needed to call myself
00:13:16.940 --> 00:13:20.600
out on my own nonsense. What had I done? What
00:13:20.600 --> 00:13:23.759
should I own in how I got to that situation?
00:13:24.460 --> 00:13:28.799
I couldn't blame the business. What do I own?
00:13:29.679 --> 00:13:33.460
And I realized on reflection, I had like three
00:13:33.460 --> 00:13:35.679
big nuggets that stuck out to me. Number one,
00:13:35.740 --> 00:13:38.220
I was doing all of that just to prove a point.
00:13:39.399 --> 00:13:41.759
I was working so hard, I was dedicating my life
00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:45.179
just to prove a point to that guy who I no longer
00:13:45.179 --> 00:13:48.399
even see at 1999 YFM after the staff meeting.
00:13:50.419 --> 00:13:52.720
And I was doing it to prove it to myself, right?
00:13:52.960 --> 00:13:56.279
That I could do it. That I wanted to shut everyone
00:13:56.279 --> 00:13:58.759
down and I didn't want anyone to doubt my credentials.
00:13:58.879 --> 00:14:01.580
That's why I was motivated. The second thing
00:14:01.580 --> 00:14:04.320
I realized also was that I was driven by ego.
00:14:04.440 --> 00:14:10.580
It was such an egocentric driven life. I wanted
00:14:10.580 --> 00:14:14.059
the title. I wanted to be the first black female
00:14:14.059 --> 00:14:16.399
program manager on a commercial radio station.
00:14:16.639 --> 00:14:20.220
I wanted it. Because I knew it would impress
00:14:20.220 --> 00:14:24.559
people. The title was more seductive than Jason
00:14:24.559 --> 00:14:30.100
Momoa. I wanted the business card that said,
00:14:30.179 --> 00:14:34.720
Claire Mawisa, Head of Content, Kaya FM. I wanted
00:14:34.720 --> 00:14:36.740
the corner office. I wanted the parking bay with
00:14:36.740 --> 00:14:41.960
my name on it. I wanted it. But what looked good
00:14:41.960 --> 00:14:44.860
on the outside felt like rubbish on the inside.
00:14:45.080 --> 00:14:48.220
I was chasing it for what? For who? For people
00:14:48.220 --> 00:14:52.340
who didn't even know or care. And the final thing
00:14:52.340 --> 00:14:56.000
I realized during that time was that I didn't
00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:58.279
feel like I had a bit of a purpose anymore. I
00:14:58.279 --> 00:15:00.899
was just moving on autopilot, just doing what
00:15:00.899 --> 00:15:05.559
needed to be done. And so during that time when
00:15:05.559 --> 00:15:08.570
I didn't really have anything to do, People kept
00:15:08.570 --> 00:15:09.929
on asking, what are you going to do next? What
00:15:09.929 --> 00:15:12.169
job are you going to do? And I had no answers
00:15:12.169 --> 00:15:16.370
for people. I was going through a dark time of
00:15:16.370 --> 00:15:21.950
reflection, admitting and owning my role in it.
00:15:22.470 --> 00:15:28.629
Very uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. I termed
00:15:28.629 --> 00:15:30.970
that time in my life fun employment, but there
00:15:30.970 --> 00:15:33.490
was no fun about it. I was telling everyone,
00:15:33.549 --> 00:15:37.389
I'm fun employed, I'm fun employed. And it was
00:15:37.389 --> 00:15:39.009
around that time that I thought to myself, I
00:15:39.009 --> 00:15:40.730
should actually go out to coffee with people,
00:15:40.830 --> 00:15:44.389
do things, see what I enjoy, because I had forgotten
00:15:44.389 --> 00:15:48.549
myself in the process. I didn't even know what
00:15:48.549 --> 00:15:52.649
I liked to do when I had free time. And suddenly
00:15:52.649 --> 00:15:55.850
I had hours and hours, 24 hours, 7 days a week
00:15:55.850 --> 00:15:59.649
of free time. And so I wrote articles for newspapers,
00:15:59.750 --> 00:16:02.629
and I stood in for presenters on radio shows,
00:16:02.730 --> 00:16:05.820
I did podcasts. And I remember one day, and I
00:16:05.820 --> 00:16:07.500
met people for coffee, and I remember one day
00:16:07.500 --> 00:16:09.559
I was leaving an office park and I was in a parking
00:16:09.559 --> 00:16:12.799
lot, walking towards my car, and I recognized
00:16:12.799 --> 00:16:15.240
a gentleman that I'd worked with about 20 years
00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:21.039
ago in TV. His name was George. And I saw George,
00:16:21.039 --> 00:16:24.460
and George saw me. He was like, Claire! And I
00:16:24.460 --> 00:16:28.419
was surprised he even remembered me. And George
00:16:28.419 --> 00:16:30.200
says, oh, it's so good to see you. I haven't
00:16:30.200 --> 00:16:33.590
seen you in so long. Let's do coffee. And we
00:16:33.590 --> 00:16:37.789
know in Joburg, that means nothing. You know
00:16:37.789 --> 00:16:39.769
what I mean? Everyone is always doing coffee.
00:16:40.490 --> 00:16:43.169
And so I'm like, internally, I rolled my eyes.
00:16:43.250 --> 00:16:45.250
I'm like, yeah, we should do coffee. And he says,
00:16:45.269 --> 00:16:46.769
give me your number, give me your number. And
00:16:46.769 --> 00:16:49.429
I gave him my number, and we parted ways. Lo
00:16:49.429 --> 00:16:52.029
and behold, the next morning, his PA calls me.
00:16:52.149 --> 00:16:55.909
Hi, Claire, this is Marie, Georgia's PA. I just
00:16:55.909 --> 00:16:57.929
wanted to know whether you're available to do
00:16:57.929 --> 00:17:00.529
coffee day after tomorrow. Are you available?
00:17:02.619 --> 00:17:05.960
Yes, I'm available. I was shocked. I was shocked.
00:17:07.279 --> 00:17:10.660
Day after tomorrow comes, I go to George in his
00:17:10.660 --> 00:17:13.519
office. Very impressive man, very impressive
00:17:13.519 --> 00:17:15.299
building. And I go and I meet George for this
00:17:15.299 --> 00:17:17.700
coffee. And he sits behind his desk and he says,
00:17:17.759 --> 00:17:20.480
Claire, so tell me, I haven't seen you in about
00:17:20.480 --> 00:17:24.140
20 years. What have you been up to? And I told
00:17:24.140 --> 00:17:26.839
George the story, the exact same story that I
00:17:26.839 --> 00:17:31.019
just told you about my radio career. 1999, YFM,
00:17:31.039 --> 00:17:35.660
Metro. All of it. Kaya FM, you know, all of it.
00:17:36.059 --> 00:17:38.619
And I even told him how I resigned the whole
00:17:38.619 --> 00:17:41.200
shebang. And I said, you are meeting me, George,
00:17:41.299 --> 00:17:45.559
now in my fun employment. It's been a few months
00:17:45.559 --> 00:17:51.619
and I haven't done anything. But I was still
00:17:51.619 --> 00:17:55.500
a different person than when I had quit. I was
00:17:55.500 --> 00:17:59.940
clearer on my boundaries. I was braver in admitting
00:17:59.940 --> 00:18:05.009
when I was wrong. my values had aligned. And
00:18:05.009 --> 00:18:07.069
I told him all of this, just like I'm telling
00:18:07.069 --> 00:18:09.869
it to you now. And George sat there in his desk
00:18:09.869 --> 00:18:12.509
and he looked at me and he says, Claire, I love
00:18:12.509 --> 00:18:14.670
that story so much. I think you're the perfect
00:18:14.670 --> 00:18:19.190
person to join our team. That was George Mazarrakis,
00:18:19.190 --> 00:18:22.490
executive producer of Carte Blanche. And that's
00:18:22.490 --> 00:18:26.349
how I joined Carte Blanche. And that was now
00:18:26.349 --> 00:18:31.619
10 years ago. Can you believe? And I tell people
00:18:31.619 --> 00:18:33.819
all the time that one of the greatest things
00:18:33.819 --> 00:18:37.539
is that when carte blanche, possibly the greatest
00:18:37.539 --> 00:18:39.799
opportunity that had come my way, by the time
00:18:39.799 --> 00:18:45.259
it came, it came with me ready. It came with
00:18:45.259 --> 00:18:52.400
me ready. I'd used that time, my little break,
00:18:52.500 --> 00:18:56.779
I'd used that time to heal, to grow, to learn
00:18:56.779 --> 00:18:59.819
the lessons. How did I get there? How do I not
00:18:59.819 --> 00:19:02.900
get there anymore? And I've learned in the last
00:19:02.900 --> 00:19:04.980
10 years, one of the greatest things is that
00:19:04.980 --> 00:19:09.299
you need to learn how to carve out time for yourself,
00:19:09.339 --> 00:19:13.700
to check in with yourself, to find out if you
00:19:13.700 --> 00:19:16.619
are still on purpose. Is this still working for
00:19:16.619 --> 00:19:19.799
me? Why is this no longer working for me? Does
00:19:19.799 --> 00:19:22.259
this feel good? What else should I be doing?
00:19:22.420 --> 00:19:26.220
What is my real purpose? What's going on? Because
00:19:26.220 --> 00:19:28.700
you can actually only do that when you get still
00:19:28.700 --> 00:19:33.180
and quiet and you're away from people and the
00:19:33.180 --> 00:19:37.500
noise and the influences of the world. Because
00:19:37.500 --> 00:19:40.160
oftentimes we do things because they look good,
00:19:40.279 --> 00:19:44.980
not necessarily because they feel good. And taking
00:19:44.980 --> 00:19:46.859
that time for different people means different
00:19:46.859 --> 00:19:51.000
things. For me, sometimes it's 30 minutes bubble
00:19:51.000 --> 00:19:53.799
bath. Sometimes it's a trip to Cape Town for
00:19:53.799 --> 00:19:58.319
the weekend. When my money is right, it will
00:19:58.319 --> 00:20:03.420
be six months in Positano. Right? But the break
00:20:03.420 --> 00:20:06.799
needs to happen on a regular basis because it
00:20:06.799 --> 00:20:09.039
allows you to realign, it allows you to move
00:20:09.039 --> 00:20:12.200
with clarity. And I know it feels so counterintuitive
00:20:12.200 --> 00:20:14.980
to say you become more productive after you've
00:20:14.980 --> 00:20:18.180
taken a break, but it's true. You're clearer,
00:20:18.339 --> 00:20:21.019
you're laser -focused on your mission. You know
00:20:21.019 --> 00:20:23.119
what matters, you know what doesn't matter. It's
00:20:23.119 --> 00:20:27.440
so easy to move away from the noise. once you've
00:20:27.440 --> 00:20:32.519
come back and you've realigned. I don't want
00:20:32.519 --> 00:20:34.519
anyone to quit their job. It's very reckless.
00:20:34.960 --> 00:20:38.279
It's what I did, but I know that I've told people,
00:20:38.579 --> 00:20:40.420
I know they're going to say, I listened to Claire
00:20:40.420 --> 00:20:43.460
and she quit her job and she had a great opportunity.
00:20:43.500 --> 00:20:46.519
That's not the point. The point is to understand,
00:20:46.640 --> 00:20:49.940
ladies, that I think especially because we're
00:20:49.940 --> 00:20:53.500
women. Sometimes we feel beholden to do more
00:20:53.500 --> 00:20:55.720
than we are supposed to do. We extend ourselves
00:20:55.720 --> 00:20:58.200
further than we're supposed to do. And we feel
00:20:58.200 --> 00:21:01.000
that it's indulgent to take a break. It's not
00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:05.680
indulgent, it's crucial. Because I took a break
00:21:05.680 --> 00:21:11.599
voluntarily. I believe it in my bones that had
00:21:11.599 --> 00:21:15.059
I not done it willingly, voluntarily, proactively,
00:21:15.279 --> 00:21:18.220
the break would have happened to me and it would
00:21:18.220 --> 00:21:20.160
have been a medical emergency. I can promise
00:21:20.160 --> 00:21:23.890
you that. So either you choose to take the pause
00:21:23.890 --> 00:21:27.109
or the pause will rain down on you like bricks.
00:21:28.789 --> 00:21:31.750
Sometimes it's a great, wonderful escape. Sometimes
00:21:31.750 --> 00:21:34.750
it's a tough moment where you are forged in the
00:21:34.750 --> 00:21:43.309
fire. I'm here just to hopefully remind you and
00:21:43.309 --> 00:21:46.529
to urge you to take that break because it was
00:21:46.529 --> 00:21:50.740
during that time that I learned the power. of
00:21:50.740 --> 00:21:52.819
the pause. Thank you so much.
