Quiet Storms

WEBVTT
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Ladies and gentlemen, this is a very special episode.
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For all the reasons you wouldn't expect.
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That's right.
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This is the Eternal Creatures Podcast.
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You are back.
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Welcome back to the podcast for people who view the world just a little bit different.
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I am Andrew B.
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As I always am, I'm here.
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She is Miss J.
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Quellen to you.
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That's right, our girl Jacqueline is also here.
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She is back again.
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I'm back.
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And we have the wandering vagabond himself.
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I've heard your complaints.
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I've dealt with your whining.
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A few of y'all met me in the streets.
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Y'all tried to confront me.
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Something's wrong with y'all.
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He said, Andrew, y'all already got rid of Liz.
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What's going on?
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You gonna drop Jesus' medal and then just let him leave for two months?
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Hey!
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I don't control this man.
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I that is right, ladies and gentlemen.
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Lucas HWP is back in the building.
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He's cracking.
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What's going on, man?
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You know.
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The heck you man, man! Help the people out, man!
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Um when life gives you lemons, you move back home for five weeks because uh you're allergic to lemons.
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Oh that's one way of new.
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That's one way of saying it.
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No, yeah, life kind of kind of not cuss.
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Uh yeah, life kind of took a dump on me, so I had to I had to get out of Dodge for a little bit and take a little break.
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Reset.
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Valid, valid.
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Come back to life.
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Are we alive?
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Are we reset?
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No.
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We're just set.
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We're getting, yeah, we're just set.
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Valid.
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Yeah, we're set, but not re- I'm re-something, but it's not set.
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Alright.
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You gotta be careful now that we're not at Keith's.
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Yeah, now that we're not when we're not at Keith's.
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Oh no.
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Keith keeps us safe.
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Insane.
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It's true.
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I'm still meeting with Keith though, too.
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It's a guardrail, like in bowling, when we're with Keith.
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Oh yeah.
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Yeah, just a lick of maturity in the building, which is good.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Alright, man.
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How y'all?
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How y'all doing?
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Good.
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Good.
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Good.
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For those who are wondering if you're watching.
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For those who are wondering what this like scarf next to my this this furry lump that my couch is growing.
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Who clearly looks depressed.
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Listen.
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Her head is straightened out on that couch.
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Yo, me and the cat be squab we be squabbling all day.
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So I see it.
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She's clearly sick of me, but still somehow still wants to be in the pot.
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I told her not to be in the pot.
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I gotta be.
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I'm realizing I'm watching me because I'm so entertaining.
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I'm not looking in the camera at all.
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So, but uh anywho.
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I'm looking at Miley, I'm not looking at you.
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She was moving.
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Sorry.
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Sister worked a long day.
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She gotta pay bills, like she's tired, you know?
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This cat does nothing but sleep and screw and screw with me.
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That's her pay.
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Hey man, listen.
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Alright, man.
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Today's episode Today's episode is dedicated to the fire marshals of America.
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Uh here's why.
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Because this is the most prevalent job of people I've never met.
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Have you ever met a fire marshal in your life?
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I feel like maybe, but probably not.
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Okay.
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I feel like I have.
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Have you ever shook someone's hand and you were like, hey, what do you do?
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And they're like, I'm a fire marshal.
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Maybe.
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I feel like it.
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I don't know.
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Hi, Jacqueline.
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That means no.
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Okay.
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Okay.
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Most likely, but I can't recall the time.
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See, exactly.
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Uh y'all are everywhere.
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You got I don't really know what you guys do except tell us that we can fit way fewer big people in a building than we actually are able to.
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So uh Oh, those people.
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Are they firefighters?
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I think some freaking I think sometimes they're like the fire chiefs or captains or sergeants or whatever ranking system firefighters have.
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Ever come to my classroom.
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They need to check schools because y'all are just brick buildings with too many people in them.
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Yeah, and I have no windows.
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So, like You don't have a window in your classroom?
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Not a single one.
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That's why I was telling you, my classroom is freezing today because it's like an igloo.
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If a fire happens in their school, they are brick oven pizza.
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Yeah.
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Like not a single window.
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There are only eight, if even, classrooms.
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In most schools.
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This isn't even like a specific school thing.
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This is like public schools.
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A lot.
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They're made of brook brook.
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Brick and mortar.
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Like fake brick.
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And they don't have windows.
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No, no windows, just concrete.
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Yeah.
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And white paint from the 70s.
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My school had uh had windows.
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What's that?
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What was that like?
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Flippin' awesome.
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Yeah, I have to have light covers over my lights because otherwise the fluorescence would give me such migraines every day.
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That's why I have so many lamps and like other lights, because the fluorescence, oh no.
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No, no, no.
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Can't do it.
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So that's that's why my classroom would be against code.
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But y'all didn't hear me say that.
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Okay?
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Great.
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We definitely didn't.
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Okay, uh moving swiftly along, fire marshals.
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Shout out to y'all.
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Thank you guys so much for uh I I think keeping our community safe or just you know making it annoying to throw events.
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Anyway.
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Alright, we'll move to the word of wisdom.
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What is this?
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I don't know.
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I'm I'm unfamiliar with the That is right, Luke has not been here for the word of wisdom.
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So I have been opening up pods with a word from our man, Mr.
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Rogers.
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So I'm gonna read Oh, for real?
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Yeah.
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Like a beautiful day in the neighborhood.
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Yeah.
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You know that guy was like sleeved up, right?
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Like he had sleeve tattoos.
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Did he really?
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That's the that's the uh the myth.
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That he was a like a Vietnam vet and had a bunch of bodies and was sleeved up, but he was the nicest guy.
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Where'd you read that?
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Reddit?
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No.
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Uh I don't remember.
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It was years and years ago.
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That's the lore.
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The dark web.
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Did you know this about Mr.
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Rogers?
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No, I had no idea.
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Okay.
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His his his quote, my favorite quote from Mr.
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Rogers, is stay strapped or get clapped.
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Oh.
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Where did you read that quote?
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Reddit.
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Hi, man.
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Well, I'm reading it from his book, okay?
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I'm reading it from the book by Fred Rogers.
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Uh well, we're gonna stick with his alias today.
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But basically, I'm gonna read this and then I ask people what it makes them think about.
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Alright.
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Copy that.
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It's a new segment I've decided to open up the pods with, just to add a little more uh the positivity to it.
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I think my mom likes Mr.
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Rogers a lot.
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I love Mr.
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Rogers.
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Mr.
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Rogers was the guy back in the day.
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I didn't watch.
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Never seen a single episode.
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Yeah.
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Really?
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Yeah, we talked because on the last pod, where it was just the two of us, you opened with Mr.
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Rogers, but I didn't watch him.
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I know.
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What?
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Maybe that's something we need to do.
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I didn't know I was sitting here with Heathens.
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This is crazy.
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You should have known that I was.
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No, that's true.
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You I knew.
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You I'm disappointed.
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Excuse me.
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Although you are you are a Yugin.
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Um I'm four years younger than you.
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That's we were graduating, well, he was graduating high school when you were coming into it.
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Yep.
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See, the thing with the thing is, like, I don't know when Mr.
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Rogers, like, his show officially ended.
00:07:59.839 --> 00:08:02.160
So like GTS, I'll do it right now.
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That four years could have been the transition to the end.
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Like I could have been watching.
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Well, when we were kids, but I'm just saying.
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Oh, then yeah, I definitely was watching Wizards of We really plays Hannah Montana.
00:08:14.879 --> 00:08:25.519
Oh yeah, I saw that stuff too, but I'll like I could have been at the tail end of his TV show while you are, and then you know, you're not seeing it because it's not really in syndication like that.
00:08:25.759 --> 00:08:27.839
Yeah, that just means now we all have to watch it.
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I mean it's a kid's show.
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Watch party.
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Okay.
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And I love watching your point.
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Yeah, I watched Radatouille the other night.
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Well, I started it.
00:08:36.960 --> 00:08:38.080
Ratatouille's good.
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I didn't finish it.
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I yeah.
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I do like Ratatouille.
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By the way, y'all, uh I'm using a handheld mic today.
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Oh, Mr.
00:08:46.879 --> 00:08:54.320
Rogers Neighborhood ran from February 19th, 1968, to August 31st, 2001.
00:08:54.720 --> 00:08:57.360
Oh so yeah, she might have just missed it.
00:08:57.679 --> 00:08:58.879
Yeah, she might have just missed it.
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I just missed it.
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Yeah, so it was.
00:09:00.639 --> 00:09:01.600
It was on that transition.
00:09:01.679 --> 00:09:07.039
Like it was kind of in its in its tail ends when I was a kid.
00:09:07.279 --> 00:09:10.720
And so probably when I was watching it, it was barely in syndication.
00:09:10.960 --> 00:09:12.399
Yeah, I never seen it.
00:09:12.799 --> 00:09:13.120
Yeah.
00:09:13.279 --> 00:09:14.480
Maybe it's a homeschool thing.
00:09:14.559 --> 00:09:14.799
I don't know.
00:09:14.879 --> 00:09:17.840
I stayed home and watched PBS Kids.
00:09:18.080 --> 00:09:18.720
You said what?
00:09:18.879 --> 00:09:20.320
My mom was in homeschooled.
00:09:21.120 --> 00:09:22.080
She was homeschooled?
00:09:22.320 --> 00:09:22.799
She was not.
00:09:22.960 --> 00:09:23.759
And she watched Mr.
00:09:23.840 --> 00:09:24.240
Rogers.
00:09:24.480 --> 00:09:25.279
Oh, that's valid.
00:09:25.360 --> 00:09:26.240
That's valid.
00:09:27.759 --> 00:09:30.879
Unless you were homeschooled, mom, and I don't know that, but I don't think you were.
00:09:31.120 --> 00:09:31.519
Alright.
00:09:31.600 --> 00:09:34.080
Well, for those of you who clearly don't know, Mr.
00:09:34.240 --> 00:09:34.639
Rogers.
00:09:34.879 --> 00:09:37.039
And if you don't know, now you know.
00:09:37.679 --> 00:09:39.120
You know, you know.
00:09:39.759 --> 00:09:41.120
I hate myself for that.
00:09:41.360 --> 00:09:42.240
No, I like that.
00:09:42.399 --> 00:09:43.360
I like that.
00:09:43.919 --> 00:09:45.120
Did you understand the reference?
00:09:45.360 --> 00:09:46.399
Do it again, Uncle Steve.
00:09:47.120 --> 00:09:47.919
We're back, huh?
00:09:48.080 --> 00:09:50.000
I said, do it again, Uncle Steve.
00:09:50.960 --> 00:09:52.080
Andrew didn't get the reference.
00:09:52.159 --> 00:09:53.279
What's the reference?
00:09:53.600 --> 00:09:55.039
It was a Biggie reference.
00:09:55.360 --> 00:09:56.240
Yeah, that's what I said.
00:09:56.720 --> 00:09:56.879
Yeah.
00:09:57.039 --> 00:09:57.759
Yeah, I know that.
00:09:57.840 --> 00:09:58.000
Yeah.
00:09:58.240 --> 00:09:59.279
I was just proud of myself.
00:09:59.919 --> 00:10:01.759
I don't listen to Biggie like that, though.
00:10:01.919 --> 00:10:02.399
I don't either.
00:10:02.559 --> 00:10:03.279
You know what's funny?
00:10:03.360 --> 00:10:05.519
I had the I had well let me close this book.
00:10:05.600 --> 00:10:07.039
I had the audacity.
00:10:08.159 --> 00:10:10.480
For a brief moment I forgot who I am.
00:10:10.960 --> 00:10:14.639
I had the audacity to say, uh like, you guys don't know Mr.
00:10:14.720 --> 00:10:15.039
Rogers?
00:10:15.200 --> 00:10:19.840
Bro, if you quiz me on most American programming, I have not seen it.
00:10:20.080 --> 00:10:21.759
Maggie and the ferocious beast.
00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:23.039
Full House.
00:10:23.360 --> 00:10:24.720
I've seen Full House.
00:10:24.879 --> 00:10:25.200
Okay.
00:10:26.480 --> 00:10:27.919
I don't know Maggie the Ferocious Beast.
00:10:28.000 --> 00:10:29.600
I've seen Blues Clues, yeah.
00:10:31.600 --> 00:10:31.919
I don't know.
00:10:32.080 --> 00:10:34.240
Maybe I maybe Future Weapons.
00:10:34.480 --> 00:10:39.360
Maybe I telepathically thought this was going to turn into quizzing Andrew to show him how inept he is.
00:10:39.519 --> 00:10:42.320
Well, I wasn't going to go with Dragon Tails Teenage Witch, but even that one I've got to do.
00:10:43.679 --> 00:10:45.679
I didn't really watch the one either.
00:10:45.840 --> 00:10:47.039
Yeah, I didn't say that.
00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:49.200
Alright, back to Mr.
00:10:49.360 --> 00:10:49.519
Rev.
00:10:49.759 --> 00:10:50.720
Yeah, I was going to say back to Mr.
00:10:50.799 --> 00:10:51.360
Russell.
00:10:52.000 --> 00:10:53.679
Guys, it's been a minute.
00:10:54.480 --> 00:10:59.440
As you know, Luke's been gone, so we're still working on the three-man weave, alright?
00:11:00.159 --> 00:11:01.279
It's a basketball reference.
00:11:02.960 --> 00:11:04.799
You're not gonna see me doing a three-man weave.
00:11:04.879 --> 00:11:05.840
I suck at basketball weave.
00:11:05.919 --> 00:11:06.480
Well, that's done.
00:11:07.039 --> 00:11:07.679
That is done.
00:11:07.759 --> 00:11:09.679
I used to do the three-man weave back in the day.
00:11:09.759 --> 00:11:10.399
That is over.
00:11:12.000 --> 00:11:12.320
Um.
00:11:14.159 --> 00:11:14.480
Okay.
00:11:14.720 --> 00:11:15.840
Oh, this is interesting.
00:11:16.000 --> 00:11:16.399
All right.
00:11:16.559 --> 00:11:25.279
So the quote for today is there is a good guy and the bad guy in all of us.
00:11:25.519 --> 00:11:30.480
But knowing that doesn't even need to overwhelm us, doesn't ever need to overwhelm us.
00:11:30.879 --> 00:11:37.600
Whatever we adults can do to help ourselves and anybody else, discover that that's true.
00:11:38.080 --> 00:11:38.879
Whatever eh.
00:11:39.759 --> 00:11:40.480
My reading.
00:11:40.720 --> 00:11:47.840
Whatever we adults can do to help ourselves and anybody else discover that that's true can really make a difference in this life.
00:11:51.200 --> 00:11:52.639
Do you need me to read again?
00:11:53.279 --> 00:11:54.320
I mean, I think I got it.
00:11:55.279 --> 00:11:57.919
I want to know what this quote makes you think about.
00:12:00.320 --> 00:12:01.840
It's supposed to be positive, right?
00:12:02.320 --> 00:12:03.279
It can, it cannot be.
00:12:03.440 --> 00:12:05.600
I was gonna say, I don't know if I really liked this one.
00:12:06.879 --> 00:12:17.360
Because I feel like the way it's said, and correct me if I'm wrong, but it's like, oh, we've all got good in us, and we've all got bad in us, and that's okay.
00:12:17.600 --> 00:12:19.039
Like, just embrace it.
00:12:19.200 --> 00:12:21.679
We just gotta help each other know, like, you're not perfect.
00:12:21.759 --> 00:12:23.600
You got bad in you too, but that's okay.
00:12:23.679 --> 00:12:24.480
That's life.
00:12:24.720 --> 00:12:25.360
I don't know.
00:12:25.519 --> 00:12:26.720
There's I don't know.
00:12:26.799 --> 00:12:33.840
That's let me reread it, because I I think even I'm trying to I was trying to fight myself figuring out what's going on.
00:12:34.159 --> 00:12:35.120
Alright.
00:12:35.759 --> 00:12:37.120
We're reading it again.
00:12:37.360 --> 00:12:43.360
There's the good guy and the bad guy in all of us, but knowing that doesn't ever need to overwhelm us.
00:12:43.600 --> 00:12:52.240
Whatever we adults can do to help ourselves and anybody else discover that that's true can really make a difference in this life.
00:12:53.200 --> 00:12:53.519
Okay.
00:12:54.159 --> 00:12:55.120
That was a better reading.
00:12:55.279 --> 00:12:56.480
I can understand that a little bit better.
00:12:56.720 --> 00:12:57.279
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:12:57.679 --> 00:13:07.600
So I don't know, I still kind of see it the same way, but I understand like there he's getting at it doesn't need to overwhelm us that we're not always great.
00:13:07.679 --> 00:13:16.000
Like we're gonna have bad moments, we're gonna have bad days, we're gonna like not act or respond according to the good man in us.
00:13:16.159 --> 00:13:18.720
Um I don't know.
00:13:19.200 --> 00:13:20.559
Yeah, that's valid.
00:13:20.879 --> 00:13:23.919
Luke, say what you think while I go turn the air conditioning off.
00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:25.039
I totally forgot.
00:13:26.159 --> 00:13:37.360
I heard it come on, and I was like Um I don't know.
00:13:37.440 --> 00:13:41.759
I can't find if I'm being completely honest, I can't find depth to it.
00:13:42.159 --> 00:13:42.320
Okay.
00:13:42.960 --> 00:13:52.320
Like for me, I'm like, yeah, everybody's good, everybody's like has good in them, but also has bad in them.
00:13:52.480 --> 00:13:52.799
Yeah.
00:13:53.200 --> 00:13:55.919
And what is it?
00:13:56.000 --> 00:14:00.879
You can like helping them find it is good, that's basically what he's saying.
00:14:04.320 --> 00:14:18.399
Yeah, but I think the part that's try we should that he's trying to emphasize is that we shouldn't be overwhelmed by the fact that we have good and bad in us, and as long as we help others realize that too, they won't be overwhelmed.
00:14:19.200 --> 00:14:22.639
I mean Yeah.
00:14:23.120 --> 00:14:24.240
I can understand that.
00:14:24.320 --> 00:14:25.279
That makes more sense.
00:14:25.519 --> 00:14:28.080
Yeah, I don't know how to not be overwhelmed by that.
00:14:28.960 --> 00:14:34.960
I I consistently sit with myself all the time.
00:14:35.759 --> 00:14:40.159
Um and I'm like, oh man, I suck.
00:14:41.440 --> 00:14:43.840
Um I don't know.
00:14:43.919 --> 00:14:48.799
I think that's why we've talked about this a lot on the pod, but uh that's why I love the Jesus prayer.
00:14:49.600 --> 00:14:54.480
Because it it uh I don't know.
00:14:54.720 --> 00:15:03.440
It's supposed to be meditative and point us back to that which is eternally good.
00:15:03.679 --> 00:15:05.120
Which is Jesus.
00:15:05.440 --> 00:15:06.080
You know.
00:15:06.320 --> 00:15:08.720
Um Remind people what the Jesus prayer is.
00:15:09.039 --> 00:15:13.360
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.
00:15:15.039 --> 00:15:17.519
So Yeah, I don't know.
00:15:17.679 --> 00:15:21.759
I've never like I don't know how you show people that.
00:15:22.080 --> 00:15:23.200
Not the Jesus prayer.
00:15:23.440 --> 00:15:25.519
Obviously we just showed some people the Jesus prayer.
00:15:26.159 --> 00:15:35.039
But how you show people not to be overwhelmed with it.
00:15:35.279 --> 00:15:37.519
Because I think a lot of people are like, I'm not bad.
00:15:38.559 --> 00:15:39.120
You know?
00:15:39.360 --> 00:15:39.759
Yeah.
00:15:40.159 --> 00:15:41.519
Like, man, it's so funny.
00:15:41.600 --> 00:15:44.000
I was literally thinking about this on the way over here.
00:15:46.960 --> 00:16:09.200
I don't remember what prompted it or what I was thinking about specifically, but I I thought about um like some of my friends where I'm like, man, if you knew like me, like what goes on in my heart, you would be wow, that's a bad dude right there.
00:16:09.840 --> 00:16:10.399
You know?
00:16:11.360 --> 00:16:15.919
And then I look at those people and I'm like Pardon me.
00:16:16.799 --> 00:16:34.799
I'm like, they could probably say the same exact thing about themselves, but the difference is the stuff that I don't know, it's like the comparison of evils where it's like I would compare somebody else's Sorry, my dad just texted me.
00:16:35.600 --> 00:16:39.440
Um that was so random, I'm sorry.
00:16:42.000 --> 00:16:43.200
What up, Dougie Fresh?
00:16:43.759 --> 00:16:56.000
Um Yeah, it's like the comparison of evils where some like I could look at somebody and be like, oh yeah, you're compared to me, you're not evil.
00:16:56.320 --> 00:16:56.879
You know?
00:16:57.440 --> 00:17:03.840
Like I could think of a handful of people right off the top of my head where I'm like, you're not evil.
00:17:04.400 --> 00:17:07.599
But you are, you know, because we're all evil.
00:17:07.759 --> 00:17:08.160
Right.
00:17:08.480 --> 00:17:10.400
But yeah, I don't know.
00:17:10.720 --> 00:17:21.279
It's uh for me, I guess the best way I can say it is this is a w uh it's a trap for me to get into a headspace like that.
00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:30.880
Because then I start comparing evils and then it makes me feel way worse about me.
00:17:31.119 --> 00:17:31.519
Yeah.
00:17:31.920 --> 00:17:32.960
That makes sense.
00:17:34.079 --> 00:17:36.640
Um so I guess sorry.
00:17:36.880 --> 00:17:38.960
I don't know how you don't get overwhelmed by it.
00:17:39.279 --> 00:17:42.000
That's I don't know how I don't get overwhelmed by it.
00:17:42.319 --> 00:17:44.160
I don't I'm not saying this right.
00:17:44.559 --> 00:17:45.279
No, I get it.
00:17:46.319 --> 00:17:47.039
I get what you're saying, yeah.
00:17:47.200 --> 00:17:47.359
Yeah.
00:17:47.680 --> 00:17:54.799
It's hard to know that and not be Yeah, not be overwhelmed by just that reality.
00:17:54.960 --> 00:17:59.119
It's I find it sometimes hard to not be like afraid of myself.
00:17:59.440 --> 00:17:59.680
Yeah.
00:18:00.079 --> 00:18:07.759
Like when I see how like uh triggerable I can be in a way, uh, it can be unnerving.
00:18:08.960 --> 00:18:11.279
Because I don't know.
00:18:11.519 --> 00:18:19.839
You can work on stuff, but you don't always know I don't know, you don't always know when like something is gonna rear its ugly head in the future.
00:18:20.079 --> 00:18:21.839
Like I think about that as a single person.
00:18:21.920 --> 00:18:34.480
I'm like, I imagine which of my toxic habits will be an issue when I get when I get married.
00:18:35.440 --> 00:18:38.799
And that kind of unnerves me a little bit sometimes.
00:18:38.960 --> 00:18:42.079
But that's again if I kind of fixate on it.
00:18:42.240 --> 00:18:49.920
Um which I don't think is what the quote is trying to say, but Jacqueline, you had a a funny face there, Drew Drew.
00:18:50.559 --> 00:18:59.359
Yeah, I'm just like I hit the chord, there's a lot going on, background sounds, so I'm like, this episode is gonna have some wild background sounds.
00:18:59.599 --> 00:19:01.519
Sorry, I was chewing gum, everybody, if you hear that.
00:19:03.680 --> 00:19:05.920
Listen, I got some real sensitive mics.
00:19:06.000 --> 00:19:09.039
I we're still in construction of this podcast.
00:19:09.359 --> 00:19:11.200
AI will help out with some of this.
00:19:12.640 --> 00:19:13.200
Thanks.
00:19:13.440 --> 00:19:15.920
AI's helping out with a lot of my editing.
00:19:16.160 --> 00:19:22.559
So um I think this quilt actually does two things.
00:19:22.720 --> 00:19:34.319
One, I think it um talks about I think one, it shows the importance of grace, and then it shows the importance of vulnerability.
00:19:35.680 --> 00:19:36.000
Yeah.
00:19:36.240 --> 00:19:49.440
So I think the first half of there's the good guy and the bad guy in all of us, that but knowing that doesn't ever need to overwhelm us, um, that is that shows I think the need for grace.
00:19:49.920 --> 00:19:50.160
Right.
00:19:50.240 --> 00:20:02.400
And I think few of uh I mean everybody kind of knows this, but few people know like the necessity of grace better than Christians in that way, because it's a massive part of like of God.
00:20:02.480 --> 00:20:04.640
It's a massive part of God's personality.
00:20:05.039 --> 00:20:09.119
Um and honestly, just Him loving us anyway.
00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:15.359
And so the way to pass that on to other people I find to be vulnerability.
00:20:15.599 --> 00:20:25.519
Uh the ability to have honest conversations and talk about both your issues and your good, um, because it makes people feel less foreign.
00:20:25.920 --> 00:20:35.200
Like we've all been at like the Bible study where like everyone's kind of giving pretty safe answers, or like all the answers are almost like symbolic.
00:20:35.519 --> 00:20:37.279
I love to boo people like that.
00:20:39.119 --> 00:20:58.400
It's like every it's like everybody's like speaking, I mean, Christianese is pretty much the way to say it, but it's like they're expressing all their problems in like a very symbolic manner as opposed to um actually saying And some of this is you know to make it a little more palatable for Tom for group conversation.
00:20:58.799 --> 00:21:05.119
But um I think it it it it sometimes it doesn't get anywhere when that's where we keep it.
00:21:05.200 --> 00:21:09.440
Like we don't really get an understanding of we don't get to relate to you.
00:21:09.759 --> 00:21:10.079
Right.
00:21:10.319 --> 00:21:10.720
In a way.
00:21:11.039 --> 00:21:27.440
Well, and I think like Luke, you made me think of an interesting point when you were talking about how hard it is for you to just sit with that, the fact that we are evil, and then start to compare with those around us or those we don't know necessarily and like their hearts.
00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:46.079
And something that I was actually talking about in one of my Bible study groups like last week, um was I have learned throughout my faith journey that we innately without Christ really don't understand how evil we are, we just live.
00:21:46.720 --> 00:21:52.319
Um, and the closer we grow to Christ, the more we understand how sinful we are.
00:21:52.559 --> 00:21:56.880
And so, according to the world, we're really like great, fantastic, amazing people.
00:21:57.039 --> 00:21:57.359
Right.
00:21:57.519 --> 00:21:59.759
We're not evil, but it's because we know.
00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:08.319
Know Christ um and truly all that he died for, and so that is what exposes us to the light.
00:22:08.480 --> 00:22:13.759
You know, like the closer we get to the light, the more the light shines on us, and the more we are exposed.
00:22:14.160 --> 00:22:15.440
Like a moth to a flame.
00:22:15.680 --> 00:22:28.799
Literally, like, and so I think that's why it's really hard for us Christians to um not compare when it comes to sin or feeling evil, because we are just so exposed the closer we become to Christ.
00:22:29.200 --> 00:22:45.680
Yeah, I was going through something one time, this is like years ago, and I was on the phone with my buddy Ryan, and uh and we were talking about sin, and he just goes, You know you're in really good company, right?
00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:48.240
And I'm like, What?
00:22:48.960 --> 00:22:52.160
He's like, Paul called himself the chief of sinners.
00:22:52.480 --> 00:22:56.000
And if Paul was the chief, then we're just fine.
00:22:58.160 --> 00:22:59.200
Stuck with me.
00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:00.480
Right.
00:23:00.880 --> 00:23:01.279
Hello?
00:23:01.680 --> 00:23:03.119
I go back to that a lot.
00:23:04.319 --> 00:23:05.519
Yeah, it's a prime example.
00:23:07.279 --> 00:23:08.640
Well, I haven't heard that in a while.
00:23:09.279 --> 00:23:09.920
He's back.
00:23:10.720 --> 00:23:11.440
He's back.
00:23:11.680 --> 00:23:12.240
He is back.
00:23:12.319 --> 00:23:12.720
He is back.
00:23:13.759 --> 00:23:14.400
Alright, yeah.
00:23:14.559 --> 00:23:16.240
Well, that's our word of wisdom.
00:23:16.480 --> 00:23:16.960
I like it.
00:23:17.119 --> 00:23:19.119
It usually gets us in the flow of pot in a little bit.
00:23:19.279 --> 00:23:21.119
Gets our gets our minds going.
00:23:21.519 --> 00:23:27.119
Uh something amusing to you.
00:23:27.279 --> 00:23:33.359
Yeah, I was gonna say my word of wisdom is distal phalange, which is the very end of your finger.
00:23:35.440 --> 00:23:35.920
Okay, we're gonna be.
00:23:42.559 --> 00:23:45.440
Alright, uh, do we want to do artists of the week?
00:23:47.519 --> 00:23:47.839
Sure.
00:23:47.920 --> 00:23:48.960
Who's your artist of the week?
00:23:49.200 --> 00:23:50.319
My artist of the week.
00:23:50.559 --> 00:23:55.359
Uh everyone, you know, don't look too excited, everybody.
00:23:56.480 --> 00:23:59.279
All right, welcome back to the Eternal Creatures Podcast.
00:24:00.240 --> 00:24:02.960
Uh all right, so artist of the week.
00:24:03.200 --> 00:24:07.440
My artist of the week is a woman by the name of Claudia Isaki.
00:24:07.920 --> 00:24:13.519
She has just dropped a new album, the name of which I cannot remember.
00:24:13.759 --> 00:24:16.960
Uh you know what?
00:24:19.759 --> 00:24:20.960
Screw artist of the week.
00:24:21.039 --> 00:24:22.960
I didn't prepare for artists of the week, whatever.
00:24:23.359 --> 00:24:24.240
I got an artist.
00:24:24.400 --> 00:24:25.359
Oh, you have an artist?
00:24:25.440 --> 00:24:25.680
Yeah.
00:24:25.839 --> 00:24:26.400
Alright, you go.
00:24:26.559 --> 00:24:27.359
Cody Johnson.
00:24:27.440 --> 00:24:28.160
No, I'm just kidding.
00:24:30.960 --> 00:24:31.839
As always.
00:24:32.559 --> 00:24:32.960
He's the phone.
00:24:33.119 --> 00:24:33.440
Oh, perfect.
00:24:33.519 --> 00:24:34.640
You've got I actually do.
00:24:34.720 --> 00:24:35.119
I actually do.
00:24:35.359 --> 00:24:36.400
Alright, you've got your phone.
00:24:36.559 --> 00:24:38.799
I'll use your phone afterwards because I'm a nerd.
00:24:39.519 --> 00:24:46.480
So um, I'm not a big Zach Bryan guy, but he just dropped, I think it's an EP.
00:24:46.880 --> 00:24:47.359
Let's see.
00:24:47.519 --> 00:24:48.240
Is it an EP?
00:24:48.640 --> 00:24:49.920
Uh yeah, it's an EP.
00:24:50.000 --> 00:24:55.839
It's only eight tracks, and it's called Young Manhood and Other Donatable Organs.
00:24:56.240 --> 00:24:58.000
Um, kind of fun.
00:24:58.240 --> 00:25:00.799
I think the title's gross, but I get it.
00:25:01.039 --> 00:25:04.960
Um again, I'm not a big Zach Bryan guy.
00:25:05.119 --> 00:25:08.640
I used to be, and then just kind of fell off.
00:25:08.960 --> 00:25:12.480
Um but this was fun, it was cool.
00:25:12.960 --> 00:25:18.720
He's got uh Lana Del Rey features on it, and Turnpike Troubadours feature on it.
00:25:18.960 --> 00:25:23.440
Um he has a song called Robot Killed the Working Man.
00:25:24.480 --> 00:25:25.599
That one's fun.
00:25:25.839 --> 00:25:26.319
I like that.
00:25:26.559 --> 00:25:28.400
It sounds like John Bellion.
00:25:29.680 --> 00:25:30.640
It does kinda sound like that.
00:25:30.720 --> 00:25:32.079
It sounds like a John Bellion title.
00:25:32.240 --> 00:25:33.599
Yeah, it does kind of sound like that, doesn't it?
00:25:33.759 --> 00:25:34.640
I'm unfamiliar.
00:25:35.039 --> 00:25:35.519
What?
00:25:35.759 --> 00:25:39.359
Yeah, I know one song of his and it's because Luke Combs is on it.
00:25:39.680 --> 00:25:40.000
Oh.
00:25:40.720 --> 00:25:41.119
Really?
00:25:41.359 --> 00:25:41.519
Yeah.
00:25:41.759 --> 00:25:45.599
I feel like you know a couple, but probably not know them as him.
00:25:45.839 --> 00:25:48.400
Yeah, they're not they're definitely not on my phone.
00:25:48.640 --> 00:25:50.000
That's that's crazy.
00:25:50.400 --> 00:25:54.160
Um, Robot Killed the Working Man.
00:25:54.720 --> 00:25:56.480
That one was pretty good.
00:25:56.720 --> 00:26:02.240
Um Beyond that, uh, this one's gonna be crazy.
00:26:02.480 --> 00:26:06.480
There's a little band called Leonard Skinnard.
00:26:07.279 --> 00:26:09.680
And they have a song called Free Bird.
00:26:10.240 --> 00:26:12.960
And I've been listening to Free Bird a lot this week.
00:26:14.240 --> 00:26:15.839
Why have you been listening to Free Bird?
00:26:16.160 --> 00:26:16.880
Because it's sick.
00:26:17.200 --> 00:26:18.960
Okay, alright, valid, valid.
00:26:19.039 --> 00:26:21.039
That's a good reason to listen to music, I'd say.
00:26:22.000 --> 00:26:23.440
Oh, uh one more.
00:26:23.599 --> 00:26:25.119
Uh Cash Moretta.
00:26:25.920 --> 00:26:43.200
This kid that I have followed on social media for a bit, and back in like November of 2025, he teased this song um on his porch, and then he didn't put out music until like I don't know, a few weeks ago.
00:26:43.519 --> 00:26:45.200
And uh he's got an album.
00:26:45.359 --> 00:26:50.720
If you've ever heard of the company Broken Bow, Broken Bow did the cover art for him.
00:26:50.960 --> 00:26:53.680
If you don't follow Broken Bow, that's fine.
00:26:53.759 --> 00:26:56.079
At least go look them up on Instagram.
00:26:56.319 --> 00:27:02.799
Um their artwork is incredible, and uh, they did the artwork for Cash.
00:27:03.039 --> 00:27:13.279
His album is called Hopeful Soul, but the best song, the one that he teased in 2025, is called Barely Find, and it is incredible.
00:27:14.960 --> 00:27:15.680
That's what I got.
00:27:16.000 --> 00:27:18.079
So, which one of these is your artist of the week?
00:27:18.319 --> 00:27:20.400
Uh Jackson Dean.
00:27:20.480 --> 00:27:25.359
I found this song the other I was gonna go again with another artist.
00:27:26.960 --> 00:27:30.880
I mean, honestly though, Jackson Dean, his song Wings, solid.
00:27:33.200 --> 00:27:34.319
Steven Wilson Jr.
00:27:36.640 --> 00:27:36.880
What?
00:27:37.119 --> 00:27:39.039
I haven't been here for two months, so I'm catching everybody up.
00:27:39.200 --> 00:27:39.599
That's valid.
00:27:39.680 --> 00:27:41.200
All right, give it a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of the list.
00:27:41.440 --> 00:27:42.880
Alright, Steven Wilson Jr.
00:27:44.240 --> 00:27:47.200
Off of his Son of Dad Deluxe album.
00:27:47.279 --> 00:27:52.559
It's the 34th track called Calico Creek Acoustic Guest.
00:27:53.759 --> 00:28:00.720
And Olivia Dean and Sam Fender uh reign me in, obviously.
00:28:00.960 --> 00:28:03.200
Well, yeah, that's that's that's a that's an awesome song.
00:28:03.440 --> 00:28:04.640
And that's what I got.
00:28:04.880 --> 00:28:05.680
Alright, Valid.
00:28:05.759 --> 00:28:06.559
Let me see your phone.
00:28:07.680 --> 00:28:10.640
Alright, that is Luke's Peoples of the Week.
00:28:11.039 --> 00:28:13.440
I was gonna say Peoples of the Five Weeks.
00:28:13.759 --> 00:28:14.079
Five weeks.
00:28:14.319 --> 00:28:14.559
Yeah.
00:28:14.799 --> 00:28:15.839
Alright, gang.
00:28:16.240 --> 00:28:17.519
Y'all need to stop holding that over.
00:28:18.000 --> 00:28:22.799
Well, while Andrew This is the first episode we get to hold it over you for.
00:28:23.119 --> 00:28:33.440
I was supposed to be gone for ten days from September 3rd to September 13th, and I left on September 3rd and I came back on October 7th or 8th.
00:28:34.079 --> 00:28:35.440
8th, I think.
00:28:35.680 --> 00:28:36.319
Yeah.
00:28:36.640 --> 00:28:37.279
Yeah.
00:28:37.839 --> 00:28:40.559
So the amount of times I asked, hey.
00:28:40.880 --> 00:28:41.599
Are you okay?
00:28:42.000 --> 00:28:42.240
Yeah.
00:28:42.400 --> 00:28:49.839
And then like, well, you didn't know when you're coming back, so I would text Andrew or another one of our friends, hey, have you heard from Luke?
00:28:50.079 --> 00:28:50.400
No.
00:28:51.440 --> 00:28:56.480
I've been back for like almost two weeks, and people are still asking me when I'm leaving again.
00:28:56.799 --> 00:28:57.119
What?
00:28:57.279 --> 00:28:57.680
Yeah, that's true.
00:28:58.079 --> 00:28:58.160
Yeah.
00:28:58.559 --> 00:29:01.039
They're like, so when are you like grabbing your stuff and moving?
00:29:01.279 --> 00:29:03.839
I'm like, I mean, if you don't want me here, I'll leave.
00:29:04.160 --> 00:29:04.640
No, no, no.
00:29:04.880 --> 00:29:05.359
Ignore.
00:29:05.599 --> 00:29:06.319
Ignore that.
00:29:06.559 --> 00:29:13.599
To be fair, we do like we talked uh we talked to you a bit during that time.
00:29:13.680 --> 00:29:13.920
Yeah.
00:29:14.000 --> 00:29:14.880
And so we supported you.
00:29:15.119 --> 00:29:15.759
Well you being out.
00:29:16.079 --> 00:29:16.960
You called me.
00:29:17.200 --> 00:29:17.920
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:29:18.000 --> 00:29:18.480
Yeah, I called you.
00:29:18.640 --> 00:29:20.319
Jake Well texted me like once.
00:29:20.640 --> 00:29:22.480
Luke, I texted you multiple times.
00:29:22.640 --> 00:29:23.200
Like twice.
00:29:23.279 --> 00:29:23.920
I'm sorry.
00:29:24.160 --> 00:29:24.960
I wasn't.
00:29:25.759 --> 00:29:26.480
I'm sorry.
00:29:26.720 --> 00:29:27.200
Sorry.
00:29:27.359 --> 00:29:27.680
Sorry.
00:29:28.480 --> 00:29:29.839
I know who my friends are.
00:29:31.119 --> 00:29:36.720
But anyway, everybody to be fair, we we supported you to be being out there for your um time.
00:29:36.960 --> 00:29:44.160
So we we've given him a hard time for the past couple weeks of j because none of us, including himself, knew that he was going to be out there that long.
00:29:44.319 --> 00:29:44.720
It's true.
00:29:44.880 --> 00:29:53.599
So I'm this is just the first episode I get to I get to say anything about it, and you weren't you're not gonna be you're not gonna hear your voice on pods for the next like month and a half.
00:29:53.680 --> 00:29:55.200
So it'd be what is that real?
00:29:55.359 --> 00:29:57.359
Yeah, I got like three episodes to come out.
00:29:57.519 --> 00:29:57.759
Man.
00:29:58.240 --> 00:29:59.920
So copy that.
00:30:00.160 --> 00:30:00.720
Alright.
00:30:01.039 --> 00:30:03.119
Now, my real artist of the week.
00:30:04.000 --> 00:30:04.960
Back to my artist of the week.
00:30:05.119 --> 00:30:05.920
Cody Johnson.
00:30:06.079 --> 00:30:08.160
Uh Cody Johnson, always.
00:30:08.400 --> 00:30:08.880
Uh no.
00:30:09.039 --> 00:30:09.359
Alright.
00:30:09.519 --> 00:30:11.759
So my artist of the week is Claudia Saki.
00:30:12.240 --> 00:30:16.880
She released an album this past weekend called Everywhere You Go, There You Are.
00:30:17.119 --> 00:30:18.799
Um, she's one of my favorite artists.
00:30:18.880 --> 00:30:21.279
She is a, I believe she's part French.
00:30:21.359 --> 00:30:23.759
Like she did an She has a couple.
00:30:23.920 --> 00:30:32.720
I'm not sure if she's Canadian or not, but I know she uh she released an album, not an album, but like a She's mostly done EPs.
00:30:32.799 --> 00:30:38.079
So in 2023, she had an EP More Flowers, where she did some of her music in French.
00:30:38.240 --> 00:30:42.240
But I think this might actually be her first like feature-length album.
00:30:42.400 --> 00:30:50.079
Um she's more of a singer-songwriter kind of vibe, has a little bit of a jazzy-ish sound to her, or like alternative kind of joint.
00:30:50.240 --> 00:30:51.599
And it's my kind of stuff.
00:30:53.279 --> 00:30:55.039
But really, really good project.
00:30:55.200 --> 00:31:00.160
My favorite song is San Francisco, um, which is ironic if you know you know.
00:31:00.319 --> 00:31:04.240
But um if you know, you know.
00:31:04.319 --> 00:31:10.000
Um, well, we don't need to call them all the way out.
00:31:11.039 --> 00:31:13.119
We don't need to call them clean now, you know what I'm saying?
00:31:13.359 --> 00:31:15.759
If we love San Francisco, we do.
00:31:15.920 --> 00:31:16.319
We do.
00:31:16.400 --> 00:31:17.920
Shout out to the San Frans.
00:31:18.160 --> 00:31:20.400
Um, but yeah, just a good project.
00:31:20.559 --> 00:31:21.440
Sounds really good.
00:31:21.680 --> 00:31:29.759
Um probably definitely one of my favorites for this year so far, and so um, yeah.
00:31:29.920 --> 00:31:32.079
Go give it a go uh check it out.
00:31:32.400 --> 00:31:35.920
Oh, and UFO UFO by Olivia Dean.
00:31:36.079 --> 00:31:38.640
So am I gonna have a chance to say my artist of the week?
00:31:38.880 --> 00:31:39.519
I haven't been here.
00:31:39.599 --> 00:31:40.799
I'm catching up.
00:31:42.000 --> 00:31:43.119
That's right, Jacqueline.
00:31:43.200 --> 00:31:43.839
Let them know.
00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:46.960
You what's your artist of the week, girl?
00:31:47.119 --> 00:31:49.200
Okay, so what's funny is that I don't really have one.
00:31:49.359 --> 00:31:50.000
Um I do.
00:31:50.240 --> 00:31:50.640
You're out.
00:31:50.880 --> 00:31:51.279
Moving along.
00:31:51.519 --> 00:31:52.000
So I have one.
00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:52.640
No, let me explain.
00:31:52.880 --> 00:31:54.000
Hold on, where's your track?
00:31:54.960 --> 00:31:56.000
Unplug your mic.
00:31:56.240 --> 00:31:57.039
Unplug your mic.
00:31:58.240 --> 00:31:59.359
Let me explain.
00:31:59.680 --> 00:32:10.559
Okay, so I don't I haven't really been listening to music as much because my day is so overstimulating with like 20 billion kids yelling my name and screaming for me and whining and all just like all the things, right?
00:32:10.799 --> 00:32:14.400
So I just when I get in the car, I just sit in silence.
00:32:14.559 --> 00:32:16.160
I drive home in silence.
00:32:16.240 --> 00:32:19.279
I get home, I like crash, take a nap, whatever.
00:32:19.440 --> 00:32:26.640
So I haven't really been listening to that much music, but the song that I have been listening to when I do play music, and it's always I it's the first song I play.
00:32:27.519 --> 00:32:32.880
Like Jesus Take the Wheel or some A Forgiving God by SEU worship.
00:32:33.119 --> 00:32:33.759
Yeah.
00:32:34.319 --> 00:32:35.119
Who's that?
00:32:35.279 --> 00:32:44.799
Um I mean, I know SEU worship, but yeah, it's a it's a university in Florida, um, and their worship is insane.
00:32:44.960 --> 00:32:47.359
Like they have albums and tracks.
00:32:47.519 --> 00:32:48.000
Go check them out.
00:32:48.079 --> 00:32:49.920
But a forgiving god is, I don't know.
00:32:50.000 --> 00:32:52.480
It's a forgiving god.
00:32:52.720 --> 00:32:53.519
Oh, a forgiving god.
00:32:53.680 --> 00:32:54.240
A forgiving god.
00:32:54.400 --> 00:32:56.799
I was like, I don't think you can forgive somebody who's blameless.
00:32:57.200 --> 00:32:58.799
No, he is a forgiving God.
00:32:59.279 --> 00:33:10.480
Yeah, and it's it's so beautiful because just where I'm at in my season right now, there's a um part of the song Chrisian, and it's it literally says, You've been out on your own for a long time now.
00:33:10.559 --> 00:33:11.920
It's time to come home.
00:33:12.160 --> 00:33:13.759
Just come to Jesus.
00:33:13.920 --> 00:33:18.799
Like he's out, he's sitting on the porch waiting for your arrival.
00:33:19.039 --> 00:33:20.000
It's time to come home.
00:33:20.160 --> 00:33:28.640
And like, not that I ever wandered, but I just feel distant, and so that's been something that um I've been working on, but like that part always just makes me weep.
00:33:28.960 --> 00:33:30.240
So it's it's a beautiful song.
00:33:30.319 --> 00:33:30.880
Go check it out.
00:33:30.960 --> 00:33:31.759
I love it.
00:33:32.000 --> 00:33:33.359
Um, yeah.
00:33:33.839 --> 00:33:35.200
Awesome, awesome.
00:33:35.440 --> 00:33:36.160
All right, y'all.
00:33:36.240 --> 00:33:37.440
Well, go check those out.
00:33:37.519 --> 00:33:39.119
Those are our artists of the week.
00:33:39.440 --> 00:33:40.720
Um, all right.
00:33:41.440 --> 00:33:47.920
To Luke and Jacqueline, anything on your hearts, minds, and souls that you would like to express to the people?
00:33:48.160 --> 00:33:57.519
Anything that you guys have been thinking about, mulling over, questioning, uh, and saying, when I boy, when I get to these mics, and I'm gonna let the peoples have it.
00:33:59.920 --> 00:34:03.200
Well, I could take it a dark turn, so I don't know, Luke.
00:34:03.839 --> 00:34:05.440
I can take it darker, so you should go first.
00:34:05.839 --> 00:34:07.759
Lord, okay, okay.
00:34:08.239 --> 00:34:12.400
Uh have this SEU worship on while you listen to the apparently.
00:34:14.079 --> 00:34:14.559
Alright.
00:34:14.719 --> 00:34:17.119
Uh all right, take a breath.
00:34:17.199 --> 00:34:18.719
And who wants to go first?
00:34:18.880 --> 00:34:20.159
Dark and darker.
00:34:21.199 --> 00:34:22.079
We'll start with Jacqueline.
00:34:22.159 --> 00:34:23.599
Yeah, you'll set the tone.
00:34:24.000 --> 00:34:30.480
Um, so I don't know when this pod is going to be released, but month and a half you said that like five minutes ago.
00:34:30.639 --> 00:34:30.960
Okay.
00:34:32.559 --> 00:34:34.239
Get all the giggles out now.
00:34:34.559 --> 00:34:37.360
Yeah, it won't be appropriate in five seconds, okay?
00:34:38.239 --> 00:34:38.719
Watch me.
00:34:38.960 --> 00:34:46.079
So when in the moment that we were recording this, the school shooting in Oregon had just happened.
00:34:46.159 --> 00:34:47.679
Like, we're not making jokes of that.
00:34:48.000 --> 00:34:48.559
Four days ago.
00:34:49.360 --> 00:34:51.440
Um yeah, no.
00:34:52.000 --> 00:35:04.719
And the teacher who passed was my age, and three students, all special education like students, were shot.
00:35:04.880 --> 00:35:12.079
Like this person was an alum of this school and targeted the special education classroom.
00:35:12.719 --> 00:35:14.639
And I don't, I don't know.
00:35:14.880 --> 00:35:18.480
Um, that whole situation just blows my mind.
00:35:18.559 --> 00:35:20.800
And then I'm driving to work this morning.
00:35:20.880 --> 00:35:22.239
I'm drive, I teach high school.
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:34.800
So I'm driving to school and I listen on the radio that there was a school here, like locally, with a student found with a gun last week.
00:35:35.039 --> 00:35:41.119
And so I'm just like thinking to myself, Jesus, like what is happening?
00:35:41.440 --> 00:35:52.480
And there's a lot of stuff going on in my district um to where I pray, like, please let that never happen to me.
00:35:52.559 --> 00:35:54.320
But I've been grappling with that thought.
00:35:54.400 --> 00:35:55.679
Like, I was thinking about it today.
00:35:55.840 --> 00:36:02.239
Like, what are the odds that that happens to me that I have to experience that?
00:36:02.400 --> 00:36:04.559
I hope and pray that that never happens.
00:36:04.880 --> 00:36:10.880
Um, and is this something that I would be willing to risk?
00:36:11.039 --> 00:36:15.280
Like, I love my job, I've only been doing it for a little over a year.
00:36:15.440 --> 00:36:18.239
Um, and I find so much joy and purpose in it.
00:36:18.320 --> 00:36:20.480
I really do feel like it's where the Lord has me right now.
00:36:20.800 --> 00:36:25.360
But um school shootings happen all the time.
00:36:25.679 --> 00:36:34.639
And so that is something that I I'm really grappling with of Lord, like when why is this happening?
00:36:34.880 --> 00:36:35.760
Why schools?
00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:37.599
Why why children?
00:36:37.840 --> 00:36:38.400
Why teachers?
00:36:38.559 --> 00:36:39.360
Like, I I don't get that.
00:36:39.440 --> 00:36:44.320
You can go out into malls, you could go walk the streets and just shoot someone random.
00:36:44.400 --> 00:36:45.599
Like, why schools?
00:36:45.760 --> 00:36:47.280
Why that specific population?
00:36:47.360 --> 00:36:48.559
Why is it so common?
00:36:48.719 --> 00:36:53.360
That is what gets me so angry um and so confused.
00:36:54.400 --> 00:36:56.159
So that's my thought.
00:36:57.199 --> 00:36:59.599
I'm gonna go right off of you on this one.
00:36:59.840 --> 00:37:03.440
Uh to answer your question, why schools?
00:37:03.679 --> 00:37:06.400
It's because they're uh they're soft.
00:37:07.599 --> 00:37:10.400
There's not usually armed security at schools.
00:37:11.360 --> 00:37:17.679
And uh because children are seen as innocent, evil wants to rob innocence.
00:37:18.800 --> 00:37:20.480
So it targets innocence.
00:37:20.800 --> 00:37:24.400
Um I'm from where the what is it?
00:37:24.719 --> 00:37:25.039
I don't know.
00:37:25.119 --> 00:37:26.880
This school wasn't built when I lived there.
00:37:27.119 --> 00:37:29.840
Um Silver It was like sil it's not silver.
00:37:30.480 --> 00:37:32.239
I would be like it's silver rain or something.
00:37:32.400 --> 00:37:33.039
Yeah, something like that.
00:37:33.280 --> 00:37:37.280
I should probably know this, but um let me look this up.
00:37:37.599 --> 00:37:41.760
Silver silver rail, not rain.
00:37:42.320 --> 00:37:43.360
One letter off.
00:37:43.599 --> 00:37:49.199
Um yeah, I I I think about the same thing.
00:37:49.679 --> 00:37:52.960
I'm not a school teacher, but I'm friends with you.
00:37:53.199 --> 00:37:59.840
We have another friend that's a school teacher in the area, and I I think about this constantly for you guys.
00:38:00.559 --> 00:38:08.480
And as a friend, that makes me feel helpless, you know, because I'm not always there.
00:38:08.559 --> 00:38:19.920
So what what ended up happening with Silver Rail was there is a a guy nearby who was on a lunch break whose kids attend Silver Rail.
00:38:20.079 --> 00:38:28.480
He had a concealed carry permit, which means he's legally allowed to carry a firearm, and he heard gunshots, so he went over to the school.
00:38:28.559 --> 00:38:30.480
And he did you hear about the other guy?
00:38:30.719 --> 00:38:36.079
Uh there was another bystander who watched the guy walk in but drove away.
00:38:36.320 --> 00:38:36.880
Oh, I'm sure.
00:38:37.199 --> 00:38:39.039
She drove away but called 911.
00:38:39.119 --> 00:38:39.280
Yeah.
00:38:39.440 --> 00:38:44.079
So he didn't actually approach the school, but he called 911 and said, hey, there's an intruder approaching the school.
00:38:44.159 --> 00:38:45.039
Sorry, continue.
00:38:45.360 --> 00:38:55.519
Um Yeah, so this dad drives over with his pistol and uh shoots this 16-year-old.
00:38:55.920 --> 00:39:03.920
Um unfortunately, it's it has to be reactionary.
00:39:04.239 --> 00:39:08.239
The dad reacted because the threat wasn't there.
00:39:08.320 --> 00:39:14.239
Like, obviously, like he doesn't have the foresight to know that this guy's gonna walk in and start shooting special needs kids.
00:39:14.800 --> 00:39:22.960
So he goes in after three kids and a teacher, no, sorry, four kids and a teacher have been shot, and then he killed the guy.
00:39:23.280 --> 00:39:27.599
I think the whole ordeal lasted less than five minutes, if I'm not mistaken.
00:39:28.079 --> 00:39:33.840
Um I could rant a lot right now.
00:39:34.079 --> 00:39:35.440
I'm gonna save it.
00:39:35.920 --> 00:39:38.719
But um yeah.
00:39:39.119 --> 00:39:42.960
I But like why schools?
00:39:43.039 --> 00:39:44.239
Like this is because it's innocence.
00:39:44.480 --> 00:39:46.559
This is a 16-year-old though, so he would have been in school.
00:39:46.639 --> 00:39:48.559
Is it was he having a bad school experience?
00:39:48.800 --> 00:39:50.719
Is that was that it like in high school?
00:39:51.199 --> 00:39:51.679
I have no idea.
00:39:51.920 --> 00:39:53.119
Is that like is this something that we can?
00:39:55.760 --> 00:40:11.440
So is this something we could do to prevent um or no I think I think they're to a degree, um yeah, we're gonna get in the rabbit hole of this.
00:40:11.679 --> 00:40:19.519
Um I don't remember which president it was, but um insane asylums got shut down, right?
00:40:19.679 --> 00:40:23.440
So now we got a bunch of crazies running around in the street unchecked.
00:40:23.599 --> 00:40:26.800
Unless you're here, then you're probably hanging out with our friend Tabby.
00:40:26.960 --> 00:40:33.519
But um Tabby's not insane, she just works at a loony bin.
00:40:33.840 --> 00:40:37.119
Um button.
00:40:37.280 --> 00:40:38.320
Yeah, we love your tabs.
00:40:38.719 --> 00:40:46.079
Um Yeah, so the there's nowhere for for deranged people to go.
00:40:46.400 --> 00:40:51.199
And yeah, um where they need to go is six feet under.
00:40:52.639 --> 00:41:09.599
They're they're not Jesus said if you uh cause one of these kids to stumble or cause one of these kids to sin, basically like if you're not if you're harming children, you deserve to die.
00:41:10.320 --> 00:41:14.559
You you deserve to have a millstone wrapped around your neck and thrown in the lake.
00:41:15.119 --> 00:41:27.119
Um the reason it happens to schools is because one of the most evil things that can happen in this world is innocence being caught.
00:41:28.079 --> 00:41:35.360
All the children that attend that school have all lost some part of their innocence.
00:41:37.440 --> 00:41:59.440
And this event, whether they saw it, whether they saw their classmates get murdered, or they saw their teacher get murdered, whether they saw it or not, or just heard it, they have to live with the reality that death came knocking at their door when they were a either in kindergarten up to fifth grade.
00:41:59.679 --> 00:42:05.920
So that's about five years old to around like 11 or 12 years old.
00:42:07.039 --> 00:42:08.800
And they have to deal with that as kids.
00:42:08.960 --> 00:42:34.079
So they don't have there is a level of of where they as children felt safe and they felt um protected, and that they like this was not something that most kids have to worry about and now they have to worry about it for the rest of their lives because it it that's what evil does.
00:42:34.239 --> 00:42:36.559
Evil creeps up and snatches innocence.
00:42:38.559 --> 00:42:55.519
And the reason, one of the other reasons it does you'll see it happen at malls, you'll see it happen at other other um places, but there's a higher chance that there's somebody with a gun, like the dad, at one of those spots, because cause schools are gun-free zones.
00:42:57.199 --> 00:42:58.960
I bet the shooter didn't know that.
00:42:59.199 --> 00:43:00.079
That's a joke.
00:43:00.400 --> 00:43:02.000
But he went in there with a gun.
00:43:03.199 --> 00:43:04.480
So did the dad.
00:43:05.119 --> 00:43:05.679
Right.
00:43:06.559 --> 00:43:08.320
So it yeah.
00:43:08.960 --> 00:43:17.599
I remember I was I was out in in Bend uh Maina over the last the whole month of September.
00:43:17.840 --> 00:43:29.039
And I I remember driving, I don't know if it was silver rail or not, but we we drove by an elementary school one time and I just looked at it and was like somebody can just walk in and do whatever they want.
00:43:29.280 --> 00:43:29.599
Yeah.
00:43:29.920 --> 00:43:30.960
And it's like heartbreaking.
00:43:31.280 --> 00:43:45.360
Like that the reason I'm asking specifically why schools is because I don't know if you heard about this when you were in Oregon, but um, like about a month ago, a little over a month ago, there was a school shooting at an elementary school back in Waynesboro where I'm from.
00:43:46.079 --> 00:43:47.920
Um, I don't know if either of you heard that.
00:43:48.159 --> 00:43:48.639
I heard about that.
00:43:48.880 --> 00:43:53.360
So yeah, it was on the news and it was five minutes away from the house I grew up in.
00:43:53.440 --> 00:43:56.880
I did not go to that elementary school because there was one closer to my house.
00:43:57.119 --> 00:43:59.440
But what happened was it was a nineteen year old.
00:44:00.159 --> 00:44:02.079
Had a personal relationship with a librarian.
00:44:02.159 --> 00:44:03.280
So he broke into the school.
00:44:03.360 --> 00:44:04.480
It was a secure school.
00:44:04.719 --> 00:44:05.920
They have SROs.
00:44:06.159 --> 00:44:11.199
Like public most public schools now have a school officer with a weapon on them.
00:44:11.679 --> 00:44:18.719
Um so this 19-year-old broke into the it wasn't Westwood.
00:44:18.800 --> 00:44:27.519
It might have been Westwood, um, elementary school, and went straight to the library because he had a personal agenda, like some relationship thing going on.
00:44:27.679 --> 00:44:32.880
And so I am like, why do you have to take that to the school though?
00:44:33.119 --> 00:44:38.159
Like if you were going after her, why could you not do that somewhere else?
00:44:38.320 --> 00:44:40.960
Like my question is, why is it always schools?
00:44:41.360 --> 00:44:43.440
Because the evil has to rob innocence.
00:44:44.559 --> 00:44:47.119
I and that's where I struggle.
00:44:47.280 --> 00:44:52.559
That's where I struggle because and I guess maybe that's and it I it might go beyond that, right?
00:44:52.719 --> 00:45:15.519
Like there's so much more um formation that happens in schools than we realize, like emotional, uh intellectual, social learning that happens, and like we really start to learn who we are at school because you spend so much of your time there.
00:45:15.760 --> 00:45:19.519
And so I don't that's why I'm I don't know.
00:45:19.760 --> 00:45:21.679
I I'm really struggling with it.
00:45:21.920 --> 00:45:22.559
Yeah.
00:45:23.760 --> 00:45:26.559
Yeah, at the end of the day, evil has to rob innocence.
00:45:28.079 --> 00:45:30.239
So to look for an opportunity to rob innocence.
00:45:31.440 --> 00:45:34.639
Yeah, the thief only comes to Steel Killing Detroit.
00:45:35.840 --> 00:45:42.000
Yeah, the thing that stuck out to me um in both of the stories that you brought up, Jacqueline, is that these guys are teenagers.
00:45:42.159 --> 00:45:42.400
Yeah.
00:45:42.960 --> 00:45:46.000
Like it's not like these are 40-year-old people.
00:45:46.159 --> 00:46:01.599
Like they're they're not far from those kids' ages, and so you know, it just kind of drives home what Luke was saying is the robbing of innocence, and he's just had longer for it to happen, these whoever these teenagers are.
00:46:01.920 --> 00:46:07.760
But yeah, no, heartbreaking situation in both in both of these cases, obviously.
00:46:08.320 --> 00:46:13.119
Um prayers to the families who lost children in this situation.
00:46:13.360 --> 00:46:13.679
Yeah.
00:46:14.079 --> 00:46:16.800
And the uh the teacher's name is Megan.
00:46:16.960 --> 00:46:17.760
I don't remember her last name.
00:46:18.239 --> 00:46:20.400
Yes, and the teacher who lost her life as well.
00:46:20.880 --> 00:46:26.559
Um and prayers to the families who are losing a kid as the shooter.
00:46:26.719 --> 00:46:27.039
Yeah.
00:46:27.199 --> 00:46:27.360
Yeah.
00:46:27.599 --> 00:46:32.400
Whether they got shot or they're going to jail, like they lost a kid.
00:46:32.960 --> 00:46:46.800
And I'm sure that those parents whatever their culpability in this is, um remember that kid when he was there the when he was the age of the little kids.
00:46:47.119 --> 00:46:47.360
Yeah.
00:46:47.599 --> 00:46:48.559
When he was young.
00:46:48.880 --> 00:46:49.039
Yeah.
00:46:49.360 --> 00:46:53.119
And so it's just a heartbreaking situation all around all around.
00:46:53.199 --> 00:46:54.559
There everybody loses somebody.
00:46:55.920 --> 00:47:15.519
And even the kids in the school that are alive, they they've either lost friends or they've lost a significant part of their innocence, and many of them their feeling of safety in a building that they at least felt safe from danger, from true danger in.
00:47:15.679 --> 00:47:19.039
And so yeah, yeah, really heartbreaking situation.
00:47:19.119 --> 00:47:29.679
And yeah, you know, I I've heard from some of the teachers in this area, not just you, but other people in our church, um, and this has affected everybody.
00:47:30.079 --> 00:47:34.159
Just mentally, just seeing this kind of stuff uh has affected people.
00:47:34.239 --> 00:47:37.119
So yeah, everybody, man, take care of yourselves.
00:47:37.199 --> 00:47:56.559
Take care of yourselves if this is something that's really like impacted you or um Yeah, be careful of how much of this stuff you ingest because it is just evil, it's depressing, and you know, it's good to be informed, but there comes a point where we gotta put it down.
00:47:56.719 --> 00:47:57.360
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:47:57.519 --> 00:48:00.639
And if you go to if you go to talk to somebody, talk to somebody.
00:48:01.280 --> 00:48:06.239
Even if like I I don't think anybody at Silver Rail listens to our podcast.
00:48:06.480 --> 00:48:08.079
I don't know anybody from there.
00:48:08.480 --> 00:48:12.079
But like any teachers, obviously I don't know any elementary school kids.
00:48:12.320 --> 00:48:14.480
But um Yeah.
00:48:14.639 --> 00:48:25.760
If you're a teacher, or even if you're just an average Joe and this bothers you and disturbs you, uh just talk to somebody about it.
00:48:26.239 --> 00:48:29.840
Like just tell a homie that it doesn't make you feel good.
00:48:29.920 --> 00:48:30.239
Yeah.
00:48:30.480 --> 00:48:36.320
Um because if you keep that bottled up, it's just not gonna it's not gonna help you out at all.
00:48:36.559 --> 00:48:40.159
Um so and you're clearly not alone.
00:48:40.320 --> 00:48:40.559
Yeah.
00:48:40.800 --> 00:48:42.559
Clearly it bothers many, many people.
00:48:43.039 --> 00:48:44.000
It bothers all of us.
00:48:44.159 --> 00:48:44.880
Um yeah.
00:48:45.199 --> 00:48:45.920
Miley.
00:48:46.480 --> 00:48:47.760
I think Miley's ready to do that.
00:48:49.199 --> 00:48:52.639
Yeah, no, you you actually got me beat uh there, Jay Quellen.
00:48:53.039 --> 00:48:55.280
I said I could go darker and I'd yeah, I can't go darker.
00:48:55.840 --> 00:48:57.280
Alright, well, I'm kinda glad.
00:48:57.440 --> 00:49:00.000
Let's perk up a little bit what you got.
00:49:00.400 --> 00:49:03.599
Oh boy, I wasn't happy.
00:49:04.000 --> 00:49:04.159
Alright.
00:49:04.320 --> 00:49:07.840
Well that's well we'll stay in this mood until we go.
00:49:08.000 --> 00:49:08.880
I'm gonna go somewhere happy.
00:49:09.119 --> 00:49:09.920
What what was your idea?
00:49:10.000 --> 00:49:11.519
What were you wanting to talk about originally?
00:49:11.679 --> 00:49:14.400
Oh, just you know, dumb stuff.
00:49:14.960 --> 00:49:18.639
So when I was out in Oregon, uh I got to go to the lake.
00:49:18.960 --> 00:49:19.280
Okay.
00:49:19.599 --> 00:49:20.960
And it was sick.
00:49:21.920 --> 00:49:28.159
Beautiful lake, crystal clear water, and for the most part I had it to myself.
00:49:28.480 --> 00:49:29.519
All to myself.
00:49:29.760 --> 00:49:34.639
And I got to go just chill and process life in like a really beautiful spot.
00:49:34.960 --> 00:49:44.800
And uh I've pro I don't think I've said this on air, but I've told both of y'all that I have a hard time where we live because I feel like it's not beautiful.
00:49:44.960 --> 00:49:46.000
It's just like trees.
00:49:46.320 --> 00:49:47.039
I feel enclosed.
00:49:47.280 --> 00:49:52.239
Yeah, I feel claustrophobic and can't see more than 50 yards unless I'm on a street.
00:49:52.480 --> 00:49:54.480
By the way, y'all, Williamsburg is not bad.
00:49:54.559 --> 00:49:56.000
Yeah, it's here.
00:49:56.079 --> 00:49:56.559
I'd like it here.
00:49:58.800 --> 00:50:00.079
Like, it's a two-low neighborhood.
00:50:00.320 --> 00:50:04.719
It's just not like if you knew the pictures he would show us from frickin' Oregon.
00:50:04.880 --> 00:50:11.920
Like, yeah, it's not like snow capped mountains and canyons with waterfalls, and yeah, it's like it's like it's freaking Nordia.
00:50:12.159 --> 00:50:14.400
Like, yeah, we can't we can't beat that 100%.
00:50:14.800 --> 00:50:17.760
We've been built on since 1702 or something like that.
00:50:18.000 --> 00:50:19.440
1607, 1607.
00:50:21.519 --> 00:50:24.880
I think we got in trouble for that the first time we recorded our first episode.
00:50:25.039 --> 00:50:25.760
Oh yeah, we did.
00:50:25.840 --> 00:50:26.000
Yeah.
00:50:27.280 --> 00:50:29.119
Yeah, somebody was like, Amber or something.
00:50:29.199 --> 00:50:29.840
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:50:29.920 --> 00:50:30.880
Shout out, Amber.
00:50:31.280 --> 00:50:35.440
Um, yeah, I said like somebody was like, when did this town get created?
00:50:35.599 --> 00:50:38.639
I was like, uh uh, 1607, because that's the name of the coffee shop.
00:50:38.719 --> 00:50:43.920
And then Amber texts us after and she's like, no, it was this other date, and I don't remember.
00:50:44.079 --> 00:50:44.400
Yeah, well.
00:50:44.719 --> 00:50:48.159
But it's 1607, I'm from the West Coast, so you know.
00:50:48.400 --> 00:50:56.159
Um, but yeah, I got to uh I got to swim in this lake, like a little cold plunge thing, and uh it was awesome.
00:50:56.320 --> 00:51:04.480
And I get to sit there and just soak in nature and pray.
00:51:04.880 --> 00:51:06.719
But none of my prayers were fun.
00:51:06.880 --> 00:51:09.440
It was like I'm sad.
00:51:09.840 --> 00:51:10.880
That's real though.
00:51:11.119 --> 00:51:12.559
I don't feel good.
00:51:13.360 --> 00:51:15.039
I'm on a feel good.
00:51:17.440 --> 00:51:19.840
I had to do that in a lighthearted way.
00:51:20.079 --> 00:51:20.880
But it was awesome.
00:51:20.960 --> 00:51:29.920
There's um there's this there's this pl uh bush that grows in Oregon, uh at least in the Pacific Northwest, and it's called Manzanita.
00:51:30.239 --> 00:51:32.400
And manzanita smells amazing.
00:51:32.639 --> 00:51:37.599
I don't know how to explain it, but the smell of manzanita is like super nostalgic to me.
00:51:37.760 --> 00:51:49.679
And the the the uh basically like the the lake is in a bowl, and surrounding the bowl is a bunch of pine trees and manzanita.
00:51:49.920 --> 00:51:53.920
So the whole area just smells like super nostalgic and really awesome.
00:51:54.000 --> 00:52:00.480
And I like grew up going to this lake, yeah, and there's a bunch of logs that are floating in the lake, and they've been there for years.
00:52:00.639 --> 00:52:15.440
So my first day when I got there, there's this log that I like we always like played on when we were in high school because we would just push it out to the middle and then play like King of the Hill, but on this log, and that log was just right there, and I'm like, no way.
00:52:15.840 --> 00:52:16.480
That's sick.
00:52:16.559 --> 00:52:24.880
And then there's like the rope swing that's still there, um, except the water's so low now that you you can't use it or you're gonna just fall on the rocks.
00:52:25.039 --> 00:52:35.119
And I have a funny video of the last time I used it, like 10 years ago, where it was too low then, and I didn't let go over water.
00:52:35.280 --> 00:52:39.679
I rode it back in and like landed in a bush, cut my back open.
00:52:39.760 --> 00:52:40.400
It's hilarious.
00:52:40.559 --> 00:52:41.440
I'll show you guys later.
00:52:41.519 --> 00:52:42.800
It's super funny.
00:52:43.760 --> 00:52:50.800
So So okay, so this is an interesting because we actually get the opportunity to now talk about it.
00:52:51.119 --> 00:52:57.679
When was the when did you make the decision from staying a week to the multiple weeks?
00:52:57.920 --> 00:53:01.280
Uh the first time, a few days before my flight.
00:53:01.840 --> 00:53:03.360
Oh, a few days before your flight.
00:53:03.519 --> 00:53:06.000
Yeah, before a few days before I was supposed to come home.
00:53:06.320 --> 00:53:08.559
Oh, before you were supposed to Okay, before your flight back.
00:53:08.639 --> 00:53:08.719
Yeah.
00:53:08.960 --> 00:53:09.599
Gotcha, gotcha.
00:53:09.760 --> 00:53:10.079
Yeah.
00:53:10.320 --> 00:53:15.119
And then so we I don't remember if we cancelled it or pushed the first flight.
00:53:15.519 --> 00:53:20.800
And then another week goes by and it's like, okay, I'm supposed to come home.
00:53:22.000 --> 00:53:23.360
And then we canceled it.
00:53:23.679 --> 00:53:25.920
Because it was just like, I'm not ready.
00:53:26.400 --> 00:53:30.719
Um and then I didn't have a flight back.
00:53:31.599 --> 00:53:38.000
But my parents were supposed to fly to North Carolina, what was it, October 6th or something?
00:53:38.239 --> 00:53:41.679
So I was like, okay, well, when you guys leave, I'll leave.
00:53:42.000 --> 00:53:45.440
So booked my flight for whatever day that was.
00:53:45.679 --> 00:53:54.960
I'm walking up to the plane, and then they have a mechanical issue with one of the overhead bins, and they're like, the maintenance gonna be here for an hour.
00:53:55.440 --> 00:53:57.360
And that means I'm gonna miss my connection.
00:53:57.599 --> 00:54:01.199
So I changed my flight to the next day and just went back to my parents' house and hung out with my dog.
00:54:01.519 --> 00:54:03.280
And then I went back to the lake.
00:54:04.400 --> 00:54:06.000
So Yeah.
00:54:06.400 --> 00:54:07.039
Yeah.
00:54:08.159 --> 00:54:09.039
What is it?
00:54:09.119 --> 00:54:13.760
Um I guess what'd it do for you being out there?
00:54:14.079 --> 00:54:17.679
Like it took me away from every single stressor that I have.
00:54:20.079 --> 00:54:21.280
External stressor.
00:54:21.599 --> 00:54:21.920
Okay.
00:54:22.400 --> 00:54:23.039
Yeah.
00:54:23.519 --> 00:54:28.719
So is that relating to like places or person places thing?
00:54:29.199 --> 00:54:29.840
Okay, all of the above.
00:54:30.719 --> 00:54:30.960
Yeah.
00:54:31.199 --> 00:54:31.760
Yeah.
00:54:32.559 --> 00:54:44.079
Cause I, for those of you that don't know, uh I started having panic attacks um at the beginning of July, like really bad ones.
00:54:44.159 --> 00:54:49.039
Like I thought I was dying, went to the hospital, and they're like, no, you're not dying.
00:54:49.199 --> 00:54:51.519
And I'm like, well, I feel like I'm dying.
00:54:51.760 --> 00:55:02.480
And I felt that way for like seven weeks straight before it kind of started to break and like change and like mellow out.
00:55:02.719 --> 00:55:10.000
And then something else came up, and then it set me sky high again, and I just kind of was like done.
00:55:10.159 --> 00:55:11.519
Like I couldn't function.
00:55:11.760 --> 00:55:15.920
I couldn't, I wasn't working, I wasn't sleeping.
00:55:16.159 --> 00:55:17.760
Um You weren't eating.
00:55:17.920 --> 00:55:25.280
I wasn't eating, I was barely talking, and like I couldn't, I couldn't.
00:55:25.440 --> 00:55:32.239
One of the things that happened was my nervous system got so sensitized that my heart rate was sensitive.
00:55:32.559 --> 00:55:37.039
So anything that I did would spike my heart rate, like way up.
00:55:37.440 --> 00:55:44.639
Um part of what I do for work is walking, like I walk around.
00:55:44.880 --> 00:55:54.159
Um and if I'm let's say I'm like an hour into it, my normal heart rate is around like 115 to 125.
00:55:54.960 --> 00:55:56.000
That's like standard.
00:55:56.079 --> 00:56:03.039
If I'm if I'm on a consistent walk for over a mile, like it's about that.
00:56:03.679 --> 00:56:06.719
My heart rate was going to 130 in the shower.
00:56:07.599 --> 00:56:08.480
Yeah, that's wild.
00:56:08.719 --> 00:56:09.199
Oh wow.
00:56:09.360 --> 00:56:09.920
Yeah.
00:56:10.239 --> 00:56:12.639
And it would just do that randomly.
00:56:12.880 --> 00:56:15.920
Like I would I would be I would wake up with that.
00:56:16.719 --> 00:56:19.360
I would wake up and my heart rate's at 120.
00:56:20.800 --> 00:56:26.639
Um I had blood work done, they're like, your blood work looks great.
00:56:26.960 --> 00:56:31.920
So it's not my thyroid, my liver, my kidneys, or anything like that.
00:56:32.239 --> 00:56:41.280
Um How long it had been, because I would say Jesus is metal, which is the last episode you were in.
00:56:41.679 --> 00:56:44.159
I was severely unwell during that podcast.
00:56:44.400 --> 00:56:45.679
And that was like two months ago.
00:56:45.840 --> 00:56:46.159
Yeah.
00:56:46.400 --> 00:56:53.119
So how long had it been, if you can remember, before that you had been dealing with that before that episode?
00:56:53.360 --> 00:56:55.199
Just to give the people some context.
00:56:57.360 --> 00:56:58.480
Two months.
00:56:58.960 --> 00:56:59.280
Yeah.
00:56:59.519 --> 00:57:06.719
Because you're still like coming down from Because it started July 2nd, and we recorded that the first week of September.
00:57:06.960 --> 00:57:08.320
Yeah, it was like right before you left.
00:57:08.480 --> 00:57:10.000
Like two days before you left or something.
00:57:10.559 --> 00:57:12.159
So two months.
00:57:12.880 --> 00:57:21.840
Yeah, so this has been this has been going on for a long time, and anybody who's been friends with you and has seen you, because your birthday was between that time and Yeah.
00:57:22.000 --> 00:57:24.079
And I was a bag of rocks at my birthday.
00:57:24.239 --> 00:57:25.039
Yeah, it was rough.
00:57:25.280 --> 00:57:26.400
I literally couldn't do anything.
00:57:26.559 --> 00:57:28.480
This has been going on for quite some time.
00:57:28.639 --> 00:57:29.199
Yeah.
00:57:29.440 --> 00:57:30.559
And it's still not there.
00:57:30.639 --> 00:57:33.360
Like I'm sitting here, my heart rates at 92.
00:57:34.559 --> 00:57:35.840
I'm calm.
00:57:36.320 --> 00:57:37.360
But like that's weird.
00:57:37.679 --> 00:57:40.719
Was it rough coming back?
00:57:41.199 --> 00:57:42.559
Like, would if Morgan?
00:57:42.719 --> 00:57:46.639
Yeah, like I was gonna say, if your parents were not coming back, would you have stayed?
00:57:46.880 --> 00:57:47.280
Oh yeah.
00:57:47.440 --> 00:57:47.920
100%.
00:57:48.320 --> 00:57:48.480
Yeah.
00:57:48.639 --> 00:57:49.199
Yeah.
00:57:49.440 --> 00:57:58.239
I told myself, I'm literally I'm I'm grabbing my bags or my backpack to get my brother's car so he can take me to the airport.
00:57:58.320 --> 00:58:02.960
And I'm he's in the car, so he's not hearing this, and I'm cussing out loud.
00:58:03.840 --> 00:58:06.639
Like I'm angry and I'm disappointed.
00:58:07.519 --> 00:58:10.480
I'm like, dang it, I don't want to go.
00:58:10.639 --> 00:58:12.320
Except I'm not saying dang it.
00:58:12.559 --> 00:58:12.880
Yeah.
00:58:13.440 --> 00:58:16.800
I'm not even saying the other D word that's bad.
00:58:17.039 --> 00:58:18.320
It's way worse than that.
00:58:18.639 --> 00:58:19.440
Found the other letters.
00:58:19.840 --> 00:58:20.320
Yeah.
00:58:20.559 --> 00:58:22.400
Um Yeah.
00:58:22.559 --> 00:58:26.960
So I told myself to get myself into my brother's car into the airport and back to Virginia.
00:58:27.119 --> 00:58:28.320
I literally said this out loud.
00:58:28.400 --> 00:58:31.760
I'm like, this is a quick trip back, I'm gonna grab my stuff, turn around.
00:58:33.599 --> 00:58:36.000
And then I got here and I was like, I'll be alright.
00:58:36.079 --> 00:58:36.960
I can stay here.
00:58:39.199 --> 00:58:40.639
So yeah.
00:58:40.880 --> 00:58:48.239
Um it takes a long time for a nervous system to heal.
00:58:48.559 --> 00:58:54.159
Um for me, what broke it, I've never talked about this, at least on here, I don't think.
00:58:54.400 --> 00:58:55.760
Nah, we haven't really talked about this.
00:58:56.000 --> 00:59:00.960
Um at first I thought it was Zins.
00:59:01.119 --> 00:59:03.119
I used to use Zins like a ton.
00:59:03.519 --> 00:59:06.480
Um that's kind of what started it.
00:59:06.639 --> 00:59:12.159
Like when the panic attacks started, it was because I was I put in a Zen that morning.
00:59:12.320 --> 00:59:18.559
And it made me feel weird, so I spit it out, and then I went to work and I threw one in and then the panic attack started.
00:59:18.719 --> 00:59:18.800
Right.
00:59:18.960 --> 00:59:19.360
Like bad.
00:59:19.599 --> 00:59:21.679
A Zen is like a nicotine patch for those who don't know.
00:59:22.000 --> 00:59:24.719
Nicotine, you just throw it in your upper lip and just let it chill.
00:59:24.960 --> 00:59:31.840
Um but it reflecting on it, uh, this has been building for eight years, actually.
00:59:32.159 --> 00:59:32.559
Really?
00:59:32.800 --> 00:59:33.199
Yeah.
00:59:33.440 --> 00:59:35.599
Um I'm not gonna go into the whole thing.
00:59:35.760 --> 00:59:37.199
I'll tell you guys eventually.
00:59:37.280 --> 00:59:41.199
I mean, you you you guys mostly know it, but it'll just take a long time on here.
00:59:41.440 --> 00:59:46.880
Um I thought I was gonna get nuked, literally, in 2018.
00:59:47.119 --> 00:59:55.440
I lived in Hawaii and we got an alert on our phones saying an intercontinental ballistic missile was heading for the islands and that it wasn't a drill.
00:59:55.679 --> 01:00:03.280
Um so I had to that whole process lasted 38 minutes from when we got that message to when the false alarm message got sent.
01:00:03.599 --> 01:00:08.159
So for 38 minutes I counted down the rest of my life, like knowing I was gonna die.
01:00:08.320 --> 01:00:10.320
Um and that jacks you up.
01:00:10.480 --> 01:00:11.519
Yeah, you know.
01:00:11.840 --> 01:00:13.599
So I dealt with that.
01:00:13.920 --> 01:00:19.840
Uh I mean that didn't even come up for like nine months to a year later.
01:00:20.000 --> 01:00:23.039
Um, like the trauma from that and the anxiety from that.
01:00:23.280 --> 01:00:32.960
Um and I remember the first anxiety attack I ever had, I was sitting in Bible school and I have cold sweats and I'm locked up and I'm like super short breaths.
01:00:33.039 --> 01:00:38.239
And my friend is on the other side of the room, and he texts me and he's like, What's up with you?
01:00:38.320 --> 01:00:39.679
I can feel you from here.
01:00:39.920 --> 01:00:43.039
And I'm like, I don't know, just pray for me.
01:00:43.679 --> 01:00:48.960
And then, yeah, so I dealt with that for years and years and years.
01:00:49.119 --> 01:00:52.000
Um, because no one could ever console me on that.
01:00:52.480 --> 01:01:06.960
There wasn't like I couldn't talk to somebody, and somebody because my whole thing was like, there could be a new kid here right now, and no one can tell me there's not because none of my friends are in that circle, they're not in that national defense space, you know.
01:01:07.199 --> 01:01:10.400
No, I have friends there, so I'm not worried about it now.
01:01:10.719 --> 01:01:16.159
But um, so I dealt with that, and then COVID happened.
01:01:16.480 --> 01:01:18.639
COVID was kind of sick for me at first.
01:01:18.800 --> 01:01:25.119
I I lived in Hawaii and I smoked pot and drank beer with my buddies and played video games.
01:01:25.360 --> 01:01:26.079
Pretty sick.
01:01:26.320 --> 01:01:31.440
I mean, if there's one way to handle a pandemic, it'd be global shutdown, yeah.
01:01:31.840 --> 01:01:35.440
And then I moved here and I had no friends and whatnot.
01:01:35.599 --> 01:01:42.000
And I was overseas and experienced a lot of trauma overseas, like a lot of death, like kids and other stuff like that.
01:01:42.239 --> 01:01:47.360
And then I moved here and all that stuff caught me at once and took me out.
01:01:47.679 --> 01:01:50.960
Um worked through it.
01:01:51.039 --> 01:01:52.960
I moved back to Hawaii for a little bit.
01:01:53.280 --> 01:02:04.239
Jesus saved me again, and then I came back here, got plugged in with the church, and then I did a little bit of counseling, which helped to like at least help me regulate my emotions, like figure that part out.
01:02:04.400 --> 01:02:08.400
Um, but I finished that in January, and then this hit me in July.
01:02:08.639 --> 01:02:16.639
But it was just I remember like in May this year, I could feel like the building up to it, you know.
01:02:16.800 --> 01:02:23.920
Like I could feel the stress of not sleeping, not having a day off from work, and having these flares of trauma.
01:02:24.159 --> 01:02:31.760
Like, for me, a big thing is smells, like certain smells will like put me back in traumatic experiences that I've had.
01:02:32.000 --> 01:02:36.079
Um and that was happening a lot.
01:02:36.480 --> 01:02:45.199
Um and I I guess like my body just got to a point where I just couldn't handle it, and it's like, we're done.
01:02:45.440 --> 01:03:01.760
And basically, when your cer your nervous system is sensitized, my understanding of it is that your body does it to try and protect you, yeah, to make you rest because it makes everything so you're so sensitive to everything that you have to stop.
01:03:01.920 --> 01:03:04.079
Yeah, you have to stop everything.
01:03:04.320 --> 01:03:06.559
Um it's nice to know that now.
01:03:06.639 --> 01:03:09.039
I wish I would have known that 15 and a half weeks ago.
01:03:09.840 --> 01:03:11.920
But uh, you know, here we are.
01:03:12.159 --> 01:03:24.639
Um so if you have PTSD, if you have trauma and stress, and uh you don't talk about it, go talk to somebody about it.
01:03:24.800 --> 01:03:27.519
Um it doesn't make you weak.
01:03:28.239 --> 01:03:31.519
Um and it'll probably help you in the long run.
01:03:31.679 --> 01:03:35.519
Uh so give it a go.
01:03:35.760 --> 01:03:37.199
That's yeah.
01:03:37.760 --> 01:03:42.400
I don't remember the first question that you asked, but that's now you know.
01:03:42.639 --> 01:03:51.519
Well, and what's interesting, like hearing because last time we talked, I didn't know it was like a a building up of everything over the last eight years.
01:03:51.840 --> 01:03:53.840
Like last time we've got until like a week ago.
01:03:54.000 --> 01:03:55.760
Right, like or I guess like a month ago.
01:03:56.079 --> 01:04:02.079
The last time we had talked about it, it was because like your body was like resetting from nicotine.
01:04:02.159 --> 01:04:02.639
Yeah, right.
01:04:02.719 --> 01:04:06.320
And nicotine is known for inducing severe anxiety.
01:04:06.559 --> 01:04:06.880
For sure.
01:04:07.199 --> 01:04:16.320
Um but I'm hearing you talk about the life you've lived, and it was trauma, and it was trauma, and it was trauma, and then it was work, work, work.
01:04:16.400 --> 01:04:19.440
I'm doing I'm going, going, going, not much rest.
01:04:19.840 --> 01:04:24.960
Until your body, like you explained it, physically told you to stop.
01:04:25.039 --> 01:04:25.280
Yeah.
01:04:25.519 --> 01:04:35.360
And so I find it so cool, and just another form of God's mercy that like he designed our bodies to force us to rest.
01:04:36.079 --> 01:04:37.360
Like he is Lord of seven.
01:04:37.599 --> 01:04:38.400
Yeah, I mean, yeah.
01:04:38.639 --> 01:04:41.440
And so he It doesn't feel like rest, it felt like hell on earth.
01:04:41.920 --> 01:04:43.440
Yeah, but you know, and yeah, that's awesome.
01:04:44.000 --> 01:04:44.880
It's a terrible feeling.
01:04:45.039 --> 01:04:53.599
But it's also like I think after this now you understand the importance of rest and taking care of your body.
01:04:54.000 --> 01:04:54.639
Yes.
01:04:55.360 --> 01:04:56.559
Taking care of my body, yeah.
01:04:56.639 --> 01:04:58.159
I haven't figured the rest part out though.
01:04:58.320 --> 01:05:00.159
Well, maybe that's what the Lord's still trying to teach you.
01:05:00.400 --> 01:05:00.960
I've been asking.
01:05:01.039 --> 01:05:01.360
I don't know.
01:05:01.519 --> 01:05:04.800
I've been asking him to help me with a lot of things and not do quiet.
01:05:06.239 --> 01:05:06.559
No.
01:05:06.880 --> 01:05:08.480
We can get into that too.
01:05:09.280 --> 01:05:10.559
That's a whole nother pod.
01:05:11.519 --> 01:05:19.840
Well, to me, I think that's kind of um that's kind of what I hear.
01:05:20.079 --> 01:05:26.719
There's something about this place that I think is forces a lot of people to sit down.
01:05:27.119 --> 01:05:27.519
Yeah.
01:05:27.760 --> 01:05:28.239
It's true.
01:05:28.559 --> 01:05:29.920
Because it's so slow.
01:05:30.159 --> 01:05:41.199
Like, I feel like a lot of people in my life, like I'll pretty much dang near all of our friends, but also like some of my family and everything, like a lot of people that are around here.
01:05:42.400 --> 01:05:46.320
This place moves so slow that sometimes it forces you to encounter yourself.
01:05:46.719 --> 01:05:46.960
Yeah.
01:05:48.320 --> 01:05:56.719
And really see the person, like the person that you are.
01:05:57.920 --> 01:06:02.639
N whether you made yourself that way or Or not, like whether it's based on choices or not, right?
01:06:02.800 --> 01:06:09.599
I think that's what uh it kind of brings me back to the quote that we talked about earlier where you know a lot of us have good and bad in us.
01:06:11.599 --> 01:06:14.800
But part of the reason we need grace is because we don't always know why.
01:06:15.119 --> 01:06:15.360
Yeah.
01:06:15.599 --> 01:06:36.239
Like we don't we you like you you aren't gonna attract the fact that there are a bunch of life events that have created PTSD that you have been like you're just living and so you're experiencing one thing and it might be years before you experience another thing, but not realizing that that last thing impacted you more than you thought.
01:06:36.400 --> 01:06:36.800
Exactly.
01:06:36.960 --> 01:06:45.280
And so as it builds on itself, then it creates this dynamic, and so you might be sitting there like, God, what the heck is wrong with like where's my joy?
01:06:45.440 --> 01:06:51.840
Like what's wrong with everything that I'm supposed to be having as a child of God, like where is that?
01:06:52.159 --> 01:07:10.960
And 100% you and it the only way we can find it is when we take a seat is when sometimes God puts us in a pi in a situation or leaves us in a moment of our life where we can sit down and come and like encounter ourselves.
01:07:11.760 --> 01:07:19.679
This is it's an artist of the week that I was not um that I haven't said yet because I haven't gotten far enough in his work.
01:07:20.400 --> 01:07:25.039
But uh John Marcomer released a book into the quiet, and that's the chapter I'm on.
01:07:25.360 --> 01:07:36.159
Is there's three people essentially that you encounter when you have when you go into moments of quiet, and that's yourself, the enemy and God.
01:07:37.679 --> 01:07:47.199
And so when I think a lot of us, when we live in these quiet communities, and it's quiet communities in an ambitious country.
01:07:48.159 --> 01:07:59.679
Like we're a noisy country, we have a lot of influence, we're very globalized, so we get to see what uh what a lot of people are doing, how a lot of people are living at any moment, and get to absorb that pressure.
01:07:59.920 --> 01:08:38.960
We talked a bit about it on your teenager episode, but um but it that's a really hard thing to like it's hard sometimes to sit to sit down and feel like you're stuck in a place where your life is just mundane and your life is not going anywhere, and you feel and all you have the ability to do is sit and look at yourself and deal with and like feel the weight of whatever issues you're dealing with or whatever stressors or whatever restlessness is within you, and seek God out as a source of refuge or something.
01:08:39.279 --> 01:08:41.520
Do either of you have a prayer closet?
01:08:41.840 --> 01:08:46.239
Uh I don't have a prayer closet, but I um this is kind of fun.
01:08:46.560 --> 01:08:47.760
Tell you all about this.
01:08:48.000 --> 01:08:51.600
While I was home, uh I started praying every night before I went to bed.
01:08:52.000 --> 01:08:53.119
That master slam.
01:08:53.680 --> 01:08:55.359
You don't hear it because we don't have headphones.
01:08:55.680 --> 01:08:58.479
That master slam was him saying, hockey's on it.
01:08:58.640 --> 01:09:01.119
You're no more gonna watch it right there in the pot.
01:09:06.640 --> 01:09:10.399
Because we're on a video show now, like we can't afford this.
01:09:13.039 --> 01:09:15.920
My half-gallon water jug that I got the other day.
01:09:16.000 --> 01:09:17.119
It's green, dude.
01:09:17.199 --> 01:09:17.840
It's green.
01:09:18.239 --> 01:09:22.159
Well, stand doesn't pay us, and the NBC is gonna sue us.
01:09:23.039 --> 01:09:24.319
It's on, yeah, it's alright.
01:09:24.399 --> 01:09:24.880
I'll call him.
01:09:25.039 --> 01:09:26.319
I mean NBC doesn't know I exist.
01:09:26.560 --> 01:09:26.720
Yeah.
01:09:26.880 --> 01:09:29.359
But when they do.
01:09:30.720 --> 01:09:34.640
Yeah, so I knew that was gonna happen.
01:09:35.199 --> 01:09:37.840
I looked at my watch and I was like, oh, the game's on.
01:09:39.920 --> 01:09:41.199
Playing Toronto.
01:09:41.359 --> 01:09:47.039
Anyways, um, I started praying every night, like kneeling next to my bed before I go to sleep.
01:09:47.359 --> 01:09:56.079
And um uh praying structured prayers, not just like kneeling down and just letting myself go.
01:09:56.319 --> 01:09:58.960
Um Shall I read them for you?
01:09:59.199 --> 01:09:59.520
Sure.
01:09:59.680 --> 01:09:59.920
Yeah.
01:10:00.159 --> 01:10:00.640
Cool.
01:10:00.880 --> 01:10:02.399
Um I we'll see.
01:10:02.560 --> 01:10:06.720
We might I might get canceled for one of one of them that I pray.
01:10:06.960 --> 01:10:10.560
But um, friend.
01:10:10.800 --> 01:10:15.039
So I I uh I start and I I cross myself.
01:10:15.119 --> 01:10:16.479
I do the Orthodox way.
01:10:16.720 --> 01:10:21.119
So you make three, put your three first three fingers together, your thumb, your index, and your middle.
01:10:21.439 --> 01:10:22.239
Give them the tutorial.
01:10:22.479 --> 01:10:25.840
Like this, if you can see for the audio or the visit video listeners.
01:10:26.000 --> 01:10:32.159
For the audio listeners, it's your index, touch your index finger to your thumb and your middle finger to your thumb.
01:10:32.319 --> 01:10:35.199
That is a sign of the Trinity, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
01:10:35.359 --> 01:10:44.880
And then the other two fingers on your hand are down, making uh that they represent uh Jesus' two natures, fully God and fully man.
01:10:45.199 --> 01:10:56.560
And then the orthodox way of crossing yourself is you start on your forehead in the name of the Father, and then you go down in the name of the Son, and then your and then you go right in the name of the Holy Spirit, and then you go right left.
01:10:56.800 --> 01:11:01.279
And it's love the Lord with all your mind, with all your soul and with all your strength.
01:11:01.359 --> 01:11:03.840
That's why you cross your to your shoulders.
01:11:04.079 --> 01:11:08.640
Um So in the name of the Father, I know the Son and the Holy Spirit, Amen.
01:11:08.800 --> 01:11:27.680
And then I pray, soul of Christ, sanctify me, body of Christ save me, blood of Christ inebriate me, water from the side of Christ wash me, passion of Christ strengthen me, O good Jesus, hear me, within your wounds hide me, permit me not to be separated from you.
01:11:27.920 --> 01:11:37.039
From the wicked foe defend me, at the hour of my death call me and bid me come to you, that with your saints I may praise you for ever and ever, amen.
01:11:37.359 --> 01:11:38.800
And then I go to the next one.
01:11:39.119 --> 01:11:43.039
O God, cleanse me as sinner, for I have never done anything good in thy sight.
01:11:43.279 --> 01:11:55.680
Deliver me from the evil one, and may thy will be in me, that I may open my unworthy lips without condemnation, and praise thy holy name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto ages of ages.
01:11:55.920 --> 01:11:56.399
Amen.
01:11:56.560 --> 01:11:59.840
And then this is the one that might get me cancelled, but I pray the Saint Michael prayer.
01:12:00.239 --> 01:12:05.600
Saint Michael, the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our defence against the wickedness and snares of the devil.
01:12:05.760 --> 01:12:07.840
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray.
01:12:08.000 --> 01:12:17.920
And do thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Hosts, by the power of God, thrust into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls.
01:12:18.159 --> 01:12:18.800
Amen.
01:12:19.039 --> 01:12:24.960
And then the last one I pray is uh Saint Patrick's breastplate.
01:12:25.119 --> 01:12:28.239
Uh my mentor prayed this over me when I left Hawaii for the last time.
01:12:28.319 --> 01:12:31.039
He anointed me with oil, and he prayed this over me.
01:12:31.279 --> 01:12:40.239
So uh each kind of part of this starts with I arise today, but I prayed at night, so I say as I s as I go to sleep tonight.
01:12:40.399 --> 01:12:42.479
Um I'll just read it as it is on the paper.
01:12:42.720 --> 01:12:54.960
As I arise today through sorry, as I arise today through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity, through belief in the threeness, through confession of the oneness of the Creator of Creation.
01:12:55.279 --> 01:13:08.319
I arise today through the strength of Christ's birth with his baptism, through the strength of his crucifixion with his burial, through the strength of his resurrection with his ascension, through the strength of his descent for the judgment of doom.
01:13:09.119 --> 01:13:29.760
I arise today through the strength of the love of cherubim, in the obedience of angels, in the service of archangels, in the hope of resurrection to meet with reward, in the prayers of patriarchs, in the predictions of prophets, in the preaching of apostles, in the faith of confessors, in the innocence of holy virgins, in the deeds of righteous men.
01:13:30.079 --> 01:13:45.119
I arise today through the strength of heaven, the light of the sun, the radiance of the moon, the splendor of fire, the speed of lightning, the swiftness of wind, the depth of the sea, the stability of the earth, the firmness of rock.
01:13:45.359 --> 01:14:10.000
I arise today through God's strength to pilot me, God's might to uphold me, God's wisdom to guide me, God's eye to look before me, God's ear to hear me, God's word to speak for me, God's hand to guard me, God's shield to protect me, God's host to save me, from snares of devils, from temptation of vices, from everyone who shall wish me ill afar and near.
01:14:10.399 --> 01:14:42.560
I summon today all these powers between me and those evils, against every cruel cruel and merciless power that may oppose my body and soul, against incantations of false prophets, against black laws of paganom, against false laws of heretics, against craft of idolatry, against spells of witches and smiths and wizards, against every knowledge that corrupts a man's body and soul, Christ to shield me today against poison, against burning, against drowning, against wounding, so that there may come to me an abundance of reward.
01:14:42.960 --> 01:15:07.680
Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me, Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ on my right, Christ on my left, Christ when I lie down, Christ when I sit down, Christ when I arise, Christ in the heart of every man who thinks of me, Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me, Christ in every eye that sees me, Christ in every ear that hears me.
01:15:16.079 --> 01:15:17.840
I didn't need to play this part of the game.
01:15:18.880 --> 01:15:20.800
And then I get into the personal prayer after that.
01:15:20.960 --> 01:15:21.520
Oh, he's not done.
01:15:21.600 --> 01:15:24.479
There's more No The Personal prayer is when I just go.
01:15:24.960 --> 01:15:31.840
You say you're a No, and I think that like he we might actually fall asleep, like, if he's gonna keep going with his meditative, like I could go on the other one that we could pray sometimes.
01:15:33.920 --> 01:15:35.439
I can read another one if you want.
01:15:35.680 --> 01:15:36.640
Well, I have a question.
01:15:36.720 --> 01:15:37.119
Yeah.
01:15:37.359 --> 01:15:43.119
Because I asked because I I just created like a prayer room for myself.
01:15:43.199 --> 01:15:46.239
Like it's something that I've Yo, this did start with the prayer room.
01:15:46.479 --> 01:15:47.119
My bad again.
01:15:47.439 --> 01:15:48.800
I forgot she asked that joint.
01:15:48.960 --> 01:15:49.520
My bad again.
01:15:49.760 --> 01:15:52.000
No, go back, go back, go to go to the prayer room.
01:15:52.319 --> 01:15:54.479
Because I got a prayer rug.
01:15:54.800 --> 01:15:56.000
Like I I right.
01:15:56.319 --> 01:16:09.359
Well, I I've known, like, since I moved into the apartment that I'm in, um, that I wanted a a an intentional space of like it's not my living room, it's not my bedroom, but I was very lazy.
01:16:09.439 --> 01:16:10.000
I didn't do it.
01:16:10.079 --> 01:16:10.880
And like I've tried.
01:16:10.960 --> 01:16:13.119
I was like reading scripture and praying in my bed.
01:16:13.359 --> 01:16:15.119
Like, there's hey.
01:16:15.439 --> 01:16:16.239
I'm just kidding.
01:16:16.479 --> 01:16:18.880
I mean, we're all listeners, but that's that's just a joke.
01:16:19.199 --> 01:16:21.119
Um I don't know.
01:16:21.279 --> 01:16:22.960
I don't really know how to describe the space.
01:16:23.039 --> 01:16:28.239
It's almost like as if it's too big, even if I'm praying on my bed and like no one's in my apartment but me.
01:16:28.319 --> 01:16:36.960
It's like the space is too available, and so I finally like not this week, last week, um, took my laundry room.
01:16:37.199 --> 01:16:44.479
Andrew, if we have the same laundry room, I literally put blankets on the floor and I made that space my prayer room.
01:16:44.640 --> 01:16:50.800
And I light a candle or a couple, and I I just I am just so vulnerable.
01:16:51.039 --> 01:16:53.600
Lights off, like I I don't know.
01:16:53.760 --> 01:16:57.119
It is something so different when you You sit there in the dark.
01:16:57.359 --> 01:16:58.399
Yeah, I light a candle.
01:16:58.640 --> 01:17:02.000
Oh um, yeah, no, it's insane.
01:17:02.399 --> 01:17:02.640
It's cool.
01:17:02.960 --> 01:17:03.920
I'll get you some like insane.
01:17:04.159 --> 01:17:06.399
I'll get you some like holy gifts.
01:17:06.560 --> 01:17:13.840
I no, when I'm in there, and because this is what I was kind of feeling like your experience in Oregon was like.
01:17:14.000 --> 01:17:19.199
Like when I'm in there, it really feels like I the the outside world does not exist.
01:17:19.359 --> 01:17:22.640
Like I am so holy, like in the presence of God.
01:17:23.279 --> 01:17:26.000
I thought you were gonna stop it holy, and I was like, No, I'm not holy.
01:17:26.239 --> 01:17:26.880
Tell me how.
01:17:27.920 --> 01:17:29.520
I'm not holy, please.
01:17:29.760 --> 01:17:34.159
Um, no, I how did you accomplish that?
01:17:34.800 --> 01:17:36.239
Um anyway.
01:17:36.800 --> 01:17:40.880
No, I like you obviously pray like God anoint the space, please.
01:17:41.600 --> 01:17:42.239
Try your sheets, yeah.
01:17:42.399 --> 01:17:44.239
Usher the spirit, actually they're Mount Athens.
01:17:44.560 --> 01:17:48.399
They are um I don't know, they're blankets that were given to me.
01:17:48.560 --> 01:17:49.600
So I don't know where they're from.
01:17:49.760 --> 01:17:50.479
But they're nice.
01:17:50.720 --> 01:17:51.119
Continue.
01:17:51.359 --> 01:17:53.279
Um What's the thread count?
01:17:53.439 --> 01:17:54.319
I'm sorry.
01:17:55.760 --> 01:17:57.199
Guys, I'm trying to talk about Jesus here.
01:17:57.439 --> 01:17:57.680
I'm sorry.
01:17:58.239 --> 01:17:58.640
Anyway.
01:18:00.079 --> 01:18:06.159
Um no, but the space is so limited and his presence is so potent.
01:18:06.399 --> 01:18:07.439
It's undeniable.
01:18:07.600 --> 01:18:15.760
And so when I'm in there and I'm looking at this tiny flame that's producing so much light, and that actually helps me see so much even though it's so small.
01:18:16.000 --> 01:18:20.880
Um like his presence is so vast.
01:18:21.279 --> 01:18:29.520
And so I I really feel like the outside world, like all of my worries, all of my cares, all of my triggers, I guess, as you would say, they don't exist.
01:18:29.680 --> 01:18:31.760
Like I feel so safe in there.
01:18:32.079 --> 01:18:32.479
Lucky?
01:18:32.560 --> 01:18:33.119
I feel so safe.
01:18:33.760 --> 01:18:34.479
Teach me how you did that.
01:18:34.560 --> 01:18:37.039
No, no, find a safe split or like a closet.
01:18:37.520 --> 01:18:40.239
That don't exist in Virginia for me, don't no, it's in your house.
01:18:40.399 --> 01:18:41.119
No, it ain't.
01:18:41.199 --> 01:18:42.560
It's definitely not my house.
01:18:43.119 --> 01:18:44.159
Make a space.
01:18:44.319 --> 01:18:47.119
I'm telling you, it's my freaking laundry room.
01:18:47.840 --> 01:18:48.399
Andrew.
01:18:48.560 --> 01:18:50.159
It's our laundry room.
01:18:50.560 --> 01:18:54.159
Our laundry room is both tiny and big at the same time.
01:18:54.560 --> 01:18:57.439
Yeah, I use all the I also use it as storage.
01:18:57.680 --> 01:18:57.920
Yeah.
01:18:58.239 --> 01:19:03.600
So um I can show you, it's I don't have much room in there.
01:19:03.760 --> 01:19:08.000
Um, but find a space, like take some stuff out of your closet.
01:19:08.239 --> 01:19:09.039
I don't know.
01:19:09.199 --> 01:19:10.399
It is so worth it.
01:19:10.640 --> 01:19:11.680
No, I yeah.
01:19:11.840 --> 01:19:13.039
We'll get into this part later.
01:19:13.199 --> 01:19:14.720
I'll tell you this part later.
01:19:15.199 --> 01:19:15.680
Go ahead.
01:19:16.079 --> 01:19:20.640
But yeah, that's all I had to say because that has changed the game for me.
01:19:20.720 --> 01:19:31.439
And like, as I was relating to earlier with my artist of the week, like having felt like I've been distant, like that room, that prayer room has changed everything.
01:19:31.520 --> 01:19:34.239
Like, I feel so close to Jesus.
01:19:34.399 --> 01:19:35.760
Um that's interesting.
01:19:35.840 --> 01:19:40.880
What is it about the is it like you mentioned that the other room was too big?
01:19:41.119 --> 01:19:43.439
Is it that this room is smaller?
01:19:43.520 --> 01:19:45.760
Is it that it's removed from distractions?
01:19:45.920 --> 01:19:51.439
Like, what is it that makes it um so I guess powerful?
01:19:51.760 --> 01:19:52.640
I guess both.
01:19:52.800 --> 01:19:53.439
I don't know.
01:19:53.600 --> 01:19:58.479
Like it it it limits, I guess it is both.
01:19:58.640 --> 01:20:04.239
Like it's small, and so therefore it limits what I see um and what I hear.
01:20:04.399 --> 01:20:07.840
Like, even in my bedroom, I can hear the cars passing by.
01:20:08.079 --> 01:20:09.520
I can hear things outside.
01:20:09.600 --> 01:20:17.039
I don't hear anything in the laundry room except for the occasional person walking in the hallway, but like even then that doesn't really happen.
01:20:17.199 --> 01:20:25.520
Like, I am so far removed from everything in the world that like I think about the world and it feels so distant from me.
01:20:25.760 --> 01:20:31.279
Um Can I can I ask you what is it what does it feel like like the presence of the Lord?
01:20:31.520 --> 01:20:37.439
Like what if when you sit in there um what about it do you recognize?
01:20:39.039 --> 01:20:40.079
Warmth, yeah.
01:20:40.479 --> 01:20:41.119
Comfort.
01:20:41.439 --> 01:20:44.640
I cry because I'm so undeserving.
01:20:45.600 --> 01:20:54.079
Like, and I'll tell you how I know that the Lord is with me, because the first time I sat in there, I was really struggling with feeling like I was valued and that I was appreciated.
01:20:54.239 --> 01:20:55.600
Andrew, I talked to you about this.
01:20:55.760 --> 01:21:05.039
It was that Sunday after um I had a really rough life group, and that's what made me feel led to create this space.
01:21:05.279 --> 01:21:11.039
Um was because I I just wasn't feeling like I was appreciated.
01:21:11.359 --> 01:21:14.399
And of course, like what is what can mirror man do to me?
01:21:14.720 --> 01:21:15.119
Whatever.
01:21:15.279 --> 01:21:18.960
Um, it did.
01:21:19.119 --> 01:21:22.159
Um I get my feelings hurt because it's like bun your little cliche.
01:21:22.640 --> 01:21:23.760
Actually, I don't get my feelings here.
01:21:25.840 --> 01:21:26.159
Sorry.
01:21:26.560 --> 01:21:26.960
It's okay.
01:21:27.039 --> 01:21:28.159
I do sometimes.
01:21:28.319 --> 01:21:32.000
Um no, but it was just like I I love other people.
01:21:32.239 --> 01:21:33.039
I I really do.
01:21:33.119 --> 01:21:39.840
I love, love, love, but I wasn't feeling like I was receiving that care and appreciation in the same way.
01:21:39.920 --> 01:21:46.640
And so, um, but a part of that I will acknowledge is I was not being as intentional with the Lord as I could have been.
01:21:47.119 --> 01:21:50.560
And so I really just felt like, dude, it's time.
01:21:50.640 --> 01:21:55.119
Like you know the space that you have to create, just do it.
01:21:55.199 --> 01:21:56.159
And so I did.
01:21:56.319 --> 01:22:00.239
I it was simple as put blankets on the floor, get a candle, get my Bible, and do all the things.
01:22:00.399 --> 01:22:03.199
And so I am so vulnerably honest with God.
01:22:03.279 --> 01:22:06.319
I'm weeping, I'm just saying, God, I don't feel loved.
01:22:06.560 --> 01:22:09.119
Like, I just want to feel seen.
01:22:09.199 --> 01:22:10.000
I want to feel heard.
01:22:10.079 --> 01:22:12.640
Like, I don't feel loved by you, and that breaks my heart.
01:22:12.800 --> 01:22:14.239
Like, I want to know you love me.
01:22:14.399 --> 01:22:17.520
Like, I know you love you, but I want to feel that you love me.
01:22:17.840 --> 01:22:22.079
Um, and I like I was just weeping and being so honest.
01:22:22.399 --> 01:22:27.199
And I do not know scripture references that well.
01:22:27.359 --> 01:22:34.640
Like, I know the big ones, John 3.16, Romans 8.28, but like I don't know scripture references, okay?
01:22:34.800 --> 01:22:38.720
Like, if someone were to be like, oh, Galatians 5, blah, blah, blah, I couldn't, I couldn't tell you.
01:22:38.960 --> 01:22:39.680
Many of the girls.
01:22:39.920 --> 01:22:42.960
Um, they've heard me try and re and quote crap up here.
01:22:43.119 --> 01:22:45.520
No, literally, and I like I don't, I just don't know.
01:22:45.680 --> 01:22:48.880
And I've read scripture, I don't know how many times, at least the New Testament, right?
01:22:49.039 --> 01:22:56.560
So this is how I know, like, I'm sitting there and I just got Psalm 118 in my mind.
01:22:56.800 --> 01:22:57.279
Yeah, yeah.
01:22:57.600 --> 01:22:59.359
And so I don't I don't know what that is.
01:22:59.600 --> 01:23:02.239
So I'm like, what that's strange, Psalm 118.
01:23:02.399 --> 01:23:02.720
Okay.
01:23:02.880 --> 01:23:13.199
So I open my Bible and sure enough, Psalm 118 is titled, His steadfast love endures forever.
01:23:13.439 --> 01:23:14.399
And so I read it.
01:23:14.800 --> 01:23:15.680
Love endure.
01:23:18.720 --> 01:23:27.760
And so I read it, and I'm weeping because I'm like, God, you're so like, oh my gosh, you're so faithful and you're so near.
01:23:27.920 --> 01:23:33.760
Like, even though I had felt you was so far, and I'm reading it and I'm proclaiming it over my life.
01:23:34.000 --> 01:23:40.800
Um, and it even a scripture is talking about, you know, the chief cornerstone was rejected.
01:23:41.039 --> 01:23:43.359
That's the foundation of our life is built upon.
01:23:43.439 --> 01:23:50.000
And I'm like, Jesus, you faced the ultimate form of rejection, and yet your steadfast love endures forever.
01:23:50.079 --> 01:23:55.439
So who am I to be upset for if I ever feel rejected or not appreciated enough?
01:23:55.600 --> 01:24:20.720
Jesus, you of all people were rejected, and so all of it, like it was the perfect passage or just like word of God to meet me in that moment, and so I was like, this space, there is the anointing, like that prayer room space is worth all the hype you hear about it, and that was just the first time I ever like tried it out.
01:24:21.039 --> 01:24:37.199
I'm glad you said this because and I want to get back to you, but uh, I'm glad you said this because I think it's one of those things that can sometimes sound like trendy evangelical, like uh Christian, I don't I don't I don't know what to even call it, like fads or something like that.
01:24:37.359 --> 01:25:04.479
Like um, and like I'm sure people take pictures of like my prayer corner and like a quiet time, but like when you take away the fact that like it can be like we can take it sometimes as just like me time, but when you really use that time for what it's meant to be, which is time with you and God, yeah, it's transformational.
01:25:04.720 --> 01:25:05.520
It's insane.
01:25:06.159 --> 01:25:06.720
Insane.
01:25:07.039 --> 01:25:07.439
Yeah.
01:25:07.920 --> 01:25:19.199
I wanna I wanna get back to you just because I want you to finish your idea on the written prayers and the and the significance that they have to you.
01:25:19.680 --> 01:25:20.239
Yeah.
01:25:20.479 --> 01:25:24.239
Um my prayers, like my personal prayers.
01:25:24.479 --> 01:25:34.960
Um if I'm being completely honest, they just I don't know.
01:25:35.119 --> 01:25:36.720
I just couldn't get it out.
01:25:37.439 --> 01:25:40.079
You know, like I couldn't get it out of my system.
01:25:40.560 --> 01:25:49.439
Like you go on a few months of just feeling abandoned by the Lord um and really wrestling.
01:25:52.319 --> 01:25:59.760
That um you feel like you get kind of rider's block, so to speak, when it comes to your prayers.
01:26:00.239 --> 01:26:06.720
Um But I knew conceptually that the Lord is near.
01:26:07.039 --> 01:26:14.239
And if anything, he was more he is more near in this season of my life than he was in the previous seasons.
01:26:14.880 --> 01:26:24.079
Because when you're really going through it, when you're really wrestling, when you're really battling, he's actually like the closest he's ever been.
01:26:24.319 --> 01:26:29.199
Um if I'm being completely honest, that sucks for me.
01:26:29.439 --> 01:26:31.600
Because I didn't I I don't feel it.
01:26:32.800 --> 01:26:45.039
I don't I don't I think in my last substack, one of my last substacks, I said something like, I don't feel it, I can't touch it, I can't hear it, I can't smell it, whatever.
01:26:45.279 --> 01:26:53.680
Like there is no my senses cannot perceive the nearness of the Lord, and neither can my soul.
01:26:54.399 --> 01:26:56.960
But conceptually, logically, I know he is.
01:26:57.600 --> 01:27:02.159
Because that's just what the word says, and that's what the church teaches.
01:27:02.479 --> 01:27:14.720
Um but I got to this point where I was like these prayers are more eloquent and powerful than a lot pretty much any prayer I've ever prayed.
01:27:15.199 --> 01:27:24.560
Um and I just got to a point where I needed help.
01:27:25.840 --> 01:27:34.000
I needed help to get what was what is inside of me out and given to Jesus.
01:27:34.479 --> 01:27:42.479
Um I know some people argue the whole vain repetition thing.
01:27:42.960 --> 01:27:49.520
Um, especially with the Jesus prayer, a lot of people argue like, oh, you're just praying it over and over again, it's vain repetition.
01:27:49.760 --> 01:27:55.680
And I'm like, if I'm asking Jesus for mercy and that's vain, we got a problem, dude.
01:27:55.920 --> 01:27:56.560
You know?
01:27:56.800 --> 01:27:59.439
Um vain, yeah.
01:28:00.000 --> 01:28:01.119
I don't think it is.
01:28:01.439 --> 01:28:05.039
But I pray the same prayers almost every night.
01:28:05.199 --> 01:28:07.359
Um, I do the best that I can.
01:28:08.079 --> 01:28:10.960
Um and they help.
01:28:12.399 --> 01:28:13.520
They really do.
01:28:13.840 --> 01:28:19.199
And even my personal prayers that come after 'em are are very structured as well.
01:28:19.359 --> 01:28:22.720
It's it's very much thank you for this day.
01:28:23.199 --> 01:28:25.600
Bless and heal my friends and family.
01:28:26.399 --> 01:28:27.920
Bless and heal me.
01:28:28.960 --> 01:28:39.840
Um I might get canceled for this too, but uh I'll ask uh Mary and the Saints to intercede for me as well.
01:28:40.319 --> 01:28:46.960
Um some Protestants might see that as a big no-no, but I don't care.
01:28:47.520 --> 01:28:49.520
Alright, we got 20 listeners, you good for that.
01:28:49.840 --> 01:28:50.239
Yeah.
01:28:50.560 --> 01:28:52.479
I'll let you know when we get a few hundred.
01:28:53.680 --> 01:28:54.319
Yeah.
01:28:55.039 --> 01:29:05.119
If um they're not dead, so if they're alive and they're in the presence of Jesus, then I can ask them to pray for me.
01:29:07.439 --> 01:29:10.479
And yeah, I found some comfort in it.
01:29:10.800 --> 01:29:16.720
What was the connection you were making with your quiet time and his going to Oregon?
01:29:17.439 --> 01:29:24.159
Well, because he said, Luke, you said that going to Oregon took you away from all your stressors.
01:29:24.800 --> 01:29:27.279
And that's how I feel in my prayer room.
01:29:27.680 --> 01:29:28.000
Yeah.
01:29:28.239 --> 01:29:30.880
Like I am away from the world.
01:29:31.119 --> 01:29:47.039
I'm away from the dangers, all of my fears, all of my anxieties, even like the desires that try to steal my attention, like I'm away from everything that could possibly like get my heart rate up.
01:29:47.680 --> 01:29:50.720
And there I I've I don't know what it is.
01:29:50.880 --> 01:29:54.800
It really it I really do feel like time is not existent.
01:29:54.960 --> 01:29:58.159
Like I've spent a long time in there and it doesn't feel that long.
01:29:58.319 --> 01:30:00.800
I can sit in silence and just be so content.
01:30:01.279 --> 01:30:14.720
Um, and so when you were out in Oregon and you were explaining that experience, it was just you and you were away from all the things that um caused you to tense up or panic.
01:30:15.199 --> 01:30:20.479
Like to me, it just reminded me of the the place I go to meet the Lord.
01:30:20.640 --> 01:30:20.880
Yeah.
01:30:21.119 --> 01:30:23.920
And so I'm sure like you probably experienced it.
01:30:24.000 --> 01:30:25.439
Like the Lord met you out there.
01:30:26.000 --> 01:30:29.039
Um Um I certainly hope He did.
01:30:29.760 --> 01:30:32.399
I didn't feel him, but I believed he was close.
01:30:32.640 --> 01:30:33.039
Yeah.
01:30:33.520 --> 01:30:36.319
Um That's what I felt like the lake was for me.
01:30:37.199 --> 01:30:40.399
Like that last week I was there, I went every day.
01:30:40.720 --> 01:30:46.640
And that's whenever I got stressed or anxious or whatever, I was like, okay, I'm out of here, I need to go to the lake.
01:30:46.960 --> 01:30:48.079
And I just peace out.
01:30:48.319 --> 01:30:56.560
So you're definitely one of the people I don't remember what it's called, but there's a test for Christians, and it's like how do you experience God the most?
01:30:56.800 --> 01:31:02.479
For some folks, it's out in nature, like going on out on walks or just out in nature.
01:31:02.560 --> 01:31:06.479
Like that seems to be where you experience God the most.
01:31:06.960 --> 01:31:09.439
Um for some people it's listening to music.
01:31:09.680 --> 01:31:11.840
For some people, it's stillness and quiet.
01:31:12.159 --> 01:31:13.439
For some people, it's worship.
01:31:13.600 --> 01:31:21.199
Like there's a bunch I took this test in college just because my small group at the time did it, but I really that could be your your thing.
01:31:21.520 --> 01:31:22.319
My good.
01:31:29.920 --> 01:31:30.880
I tried.
01:31:32.159 --> 01:31:32.960
Thanks for trying.
01:31:33.439 --> 01:31:42.880
I would challenge you to find or to not find, not just find, but also make uh a quiet place for you.
01:31:44.800 --> 01:31:48.720
Because if for no other reason, it's because that's what Jesus did.
01:31:50.159 --> 01:31:56.479
And so Jesus, no matter where he was, he would take time to retreat and go talk to God.
01:31:57.279 --> 01:32:09.520
And when you have those places, and the more that you're edifying them, um by the time you spend in those places, you find you find more of those times to be like, you know what?
01:32:09.600 --> 01:32:11.439
I actually want to be over here right now.
01:32:12.399 --> 01:32:17.439
Um I actually think it's necessary.
01:32:18.399 --> 01:32:22.479
I think it's really necessary to kind of answer your question.
01:32:22.720 --> 01:32:26.000
My uh prayer closet essentially is my bedroom.
01:32:26.960 --> 01:32:30.479
It wasn't, but then I took my desk out of there.
01:32:31.840 --> 01:32:38.319
And so the reason I took my desk out of there is because of something you referred to a little earlier, Luke.
01:32:38.479 --> 01:32:41.920
When you came here, you kind of felt the weight of a lot of your issues.
01:32:42.079 --> 01:32:45.439
When you were over in Oregon, it you didn't have those.
01:32:46.159 --> 01:32:54.399
And so for me, work, the just the world and concept of career and all that kind of stuff has been a conflict for me.
01:32:54.640 --> 01:32:58.880
And so but that it but my room is the place that I rest.
01:32:59.039 --> 01:33:06.399
And so I thought, you know, if I just take my desk out of it, and I forget when I decided this, but I basically switched.
01:33:06.479 --> 01:33:10.720
I switched my rocking chair that I sit in when I pray, and my desk.
01:33:10.880 --> 01:33:17.840
And I brought my desk out into the normal, into my living room area and put the chair in there, and it's made all the difference.
01:33:18.079 --> 01:33:19.439
It's right next to a window.
01:33:19.600 --> 01:33:26.399
I can put my candle there, I can put my coffee there, I can see out the trees outside, because nature's a big deal for me as well.
01:33:26.479 --> 01:33:35.520
Yeah, and I can practice leaving my phone out here, like I can, but it's now quiet, it's enclosed.
01:33:35.760 --> 01:33:48.319
I moved, I also moved uh well, my bookshelf has always been out here, but I just tried to like bring as much stuff out of my bedroom as possible to make it open and clean and simple.
01:33:49.119 --> 01:34:05.520
And so for anybody, for anyone who's interested, um when you start looking into the spiritual discipline, solitude and silence is one that many, many saints talk about.
01:34:05.600 --> 01:34:12.960
Yeah, but they also say that in the American church it is one of the least practiced of them.
01:34:13.359 --> 01:34:13.760
For sure.
01:34:14.239 --> 01:34:19.439
And part of it, I think, is because we are such a knowledge-based culture.
01:34:20.640 --> 01:34:43.520
And so what we take into the quiet places with us is devotions and Bible study plans and things that actually can sometimes distract us from actually feeling the presence of God because we're just it we it we be we take an agenda into our quiet spaces.
01:34:43.840 --> 01:34:50.479
And so it's not that there should be nothing that's done in there, but you mentioned written prayers.
01:34:50.640 --> 01:34:55.439
Written prayers are sometimes helpful for truth when you feel like you're not connected to it.
01:34:55.760 --> 01:34:56.800
Same with scripture.
01:34:56.960 --> 01:34:57.279
Yeah.
01:34:57.680 --> 01:35:07.279
Um like a candle is like many people have mentioned bringing a candle into those quiet places because uh for various reasons.
01:35:07.359 --> 01:35:10.560
In your place, it provides like one central point of light.
01:35:10.800 --> 01:35:18.000
But it also, like, some people view the fire as like similar to when the fire was leading the the Israelites in Exodus.
01:35:18.079 --> 01:35:20.079
Like there's a symbol aspect to it.
01:35:22.159 --> 01:35:34.640
For me, like when I look at the candle, when I'm actually looking at the fire, it is this weird thing that both that almost exists but doesn't exist, even though it's in it looks incredibly small, it's also really powerful.
01:35:34.720 --> 01:35:36.000
Like I can't touch it.
01:35:36.159 --> 01:35:46.399
And so there's this weird resemblance, like I almost view view it as like material-wise, resembling God's power almost more than anything else.
01:35:46.800 --> 01:35:47.439
Like his holiness.
01:35:47.600 --> 01:35:49.119
Oh, yeah, no, I'll talk to the flame.
01:35:49.199 --> 01:35:54.560
Like, obviously, I know the flame isn't God, but I definitely look at the flame and I'm like, see, look at you.
01:35:54.720 --> 01:35:57.680
Like, I mean, I'm talking to the flame as if it's as it's a symbol of God.
01:35:58.000 --> 01:35:59.520
It points you back to the creator.
01:35:59.680 --> 01:36:00.000
Yeah.
01:36:00.159 --> 01:36:00.479
Yeah.
01:36:00.800 --> 01:36:01.439
Right.
01:36:01.920 --> 01:36:10.720
And so I I've been talking a little bit about Solitude and Silence a bit on this podcast.
01:36:11.199 --> 01:36:19.920
But I really encourage people, if you don't know anything about it and you want to try it, I suggest getting John Mark Homer's Into the Quiet.
01:36:20.159 --> 01:36:25.439
I will talk more about it because I'm going through it and I'm about to go to an event related to it.
01:36:25.520 --> 01:36:43.439
So I will be talking more about this concept, but I just think what like it's just interesting to hear the stories that have come out of our discussion and see how much of it relates to just the need to slow down.
01:36:45.920 --> 01:36:56.079
The need to slow down and sit with yourself and God and how healing that is.
01:36:57.039 --> 01:37:09.359
Sometimes removing yourself from the busyness of life, from the frustrations of your day and your world, and just taking a second to just stop.
01:37:10.720 --> 01:37:17.840
And what you all what you all have shown is I think embracing that.
01:37:19.119 --> 01:37:25.439
What was nice about you staying in Oregon for as long as you did is that you embraced whatever was happening over there.
01:37:25.680 --> 01:37:26.239
Oh yeah.
01:37:26.479 --> 01:37:30.880
Whatever that feeling was that was bringing you that was bringing you a sense of calm.
01:37:31.119 --> 01:37:44.960
It could have been it was a mix it probably was a mix of having of being home, being around people who have loved you for a long time, and a place, because places do have carry things.
01:37:45.119 --> 01:37:48.319
Places carry memories, places carry associations.
01:37:48.479 --> 01:38:01.840
So like it's probably nice to leave a place that at this time in your life you've associated with a lot more heaviness and go somewhere that you have a just a different, probably warmer association with.
01:38:59.199 --> 01:38:59.760
Curses.
01:39:00.000 --> 01:39:01.840
Yeah, curses, spiritual warfare.
01:39:02.479 --> 01:39:03.680
In Jesus' name.
01:39:03.920 --> 01:39:05.199
They're still here.
01:39:05.920 --> 01:39:16.720
But sometimes it sometimes it really is that you that God will put us in times of our life that force us to have those moments.
01:39:16.800 --> 01:39:16.960
Yeah.
01:39:17.119 --> 01:39:37.039
And if we embrace it, I've started figuring out that it actually does a lot more good when we recognize, okay, I'm here, I'm gonna sit here, and I'm gonna see what you and I, what life is like for you and I, if I just remain here.
01:39:37.359 --> 01:39:46.479
Because ultimately, and that's why even though Virginia is a tough place for for you to do that, it's necessary because he's everywhere.
01:39:47.119 --> 01:39:51.760
And so no matter where we go, we have to find those times.
01:39:51.840 --> 01:39:54.079
Yeah, we have to recognize that.
01:39:56.239 --> 01:39:57.039
So yeah.
01:39:58.000 --> 01:39:58.640
Thanks.
01:39:58.800 --> 01:39:59.680
Yeah, I love you.
01:39:59.840 --> 01:40:04.880
Thank y'all knew I had yo, gotta be potten.
01:40:06.000 --> 01:40:06.319
Yeah.
01:40:06.560 --> 01:40:10.399
If this episode wasn't as dumb, like or not dumb.
01:40:10.560 --> 01:40:16.079
If this episode wasn't as serious, I would have named it something stupid, like Gabby Potton or Three Men Weave.
01:40:16.800 --> 01:40:18.560
Because we definitely got weave it.
01:40:19.199 --> 01:40:21.279
But I have to figure something out more reverential.
01:40:21.359 --> 01:40:23.279
I can't be doing this to the topics that we've had.
01:40:23.439 --> 01:40:38.640
But um, yeah, no, it it's something that I was like, uh while y'all are talking, I'm watching him uh pull together a story and a narrative that I'm like, oh, I didn't have this and I I did all.
01:40:39.119 --> 01:40:42.399
I was just here to crack my little jokes, and they weren't even that funny.
01:40:42.560 --> 01:40:47.199
So I was like, uh So yeah, I don't know, where the conversation went was incredible.
01:40:47.359 --> 01:40:50.399
And the fact that a lot of it even connected to the quote we had.
01:40:50.560 --> 01:40:55.279
Yes or essentially you guys ended up resembling the quote that we read in the beginning.
01:40:55.600 --> 01:40:56.880
Sick, sick.
01:40:57.439 --> 01:40:59.199
Alright, any closing words for the people?
01:41:00.880 --> 01:41:02.319
Thanks for having me.
01:41:02.560 --> 01:41:03.439
That's all I got.
01:41:03.680 --> 01:41:04.640
You're on the podcast.
01:41:05.119 --> 01:41:05.680
Thanks for having me.
01:41:05.920 --> 01:41:07.279
Yeah, you said that like you're a guest.
01:41:07.600 --> 01:41:10.000
I know, but like it's still an honor to be here, you know.
01:41:10.479 --> 01:41:14.000
Okay, well, it's not still starstruck because she's hanging out with us.
01:41:14.239 --> 01:41:14.720
That too.
01:41:14.880 --> 01:41:15.520
Yep, that's it.
01:41:15.680 --> 01:41:15.920
Yeah.
01:41:17.520 --> 01:41:20.560
Oh I'm I have closing things.
01:41:20.720 --> 01:41:22.159
Oh, okay, go ahead.
01:41:22.640 --> 01:41:23.680
I need to find it.
01:41:24.000 --> 01:41:26.239
Okay, well, I'll have a grape until then.
01:41:26.640 --> 01:41:27.680
And boom.
01:41:28.000 --> 01:41:28.640
Ready?
01:41:28.960 --> 01:41:30.960
You guys want NIV or ESV?
01:41:31.119 --> 01:41:32.560
ESV Supremacy.
01:41:32.720 --> 01:41:33.119
Yep.
01:41:33.840 --> 01:41:34.239
Sure.
01:41:35.199 --> 01:41:36.560
Psalm ninety one.
01:41:37.600 --> 01:41:42.479
He who dwells in the shelter of the most high will abide in the shadow of the almighty.
01:41:42.720 --> 01:41:53.039
I will say to the Lord, My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust, for he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence.
01:41:53.199 --> 01:41:58.000
He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge.
01:41:58.239 --> 01:42:01.279
His faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
01:42:01.600 --> 01:42:12.880
You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.
01:42:13.119 --> 01:42:18.880
A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you.
01:42:19.680 --> 01:42:29.920
You will only look with your eyes and see the recompense of the wicked, because you have made the Lord your dwelling place, the most high, who is my refuge.
01:42:30.239 --> 01:42:40.399
No evil shall be allowed to befall you, no plague come near your tent, for he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.
01:42:40.720 --> 01:42:45.600
On their hands they will bear you up lest you strike your foot against a stone.
01:42:45.920 --> 01:42:48.479
You will tread on the lion and the adder.
01:42:48.800 --> 01:42:52.000
The young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.
01:42:52.319 --> 01:42:55.760
Because he holds fast to me in love I will deliver him.
01:42:56.079 --> 01:42:59.199
I will protect him because he knows my name.
01:42:59.439 --> 01:43:01.840
When he calls to me I will answer him.
01:43:02.079 --> 01:43:06.319
I will be with him in trouble, I will rescue him and honor him.
01:43:06.479 --> 01:43:11.840
With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.
01:43:15.840 --> 01:43:16.479
Amen.
01:43:18.000 --> 01:43:18.960
Amen indeed.
01:43:19.840 --> 01:43:20.800
Alright, Joe.
01:43:21.039 --> 01:43:22.079
Thank you very much.
01:43:22.560 --> 01:43:23.760
Play the music, Keith.
01:43:24.560 --> 01:43:25.760
Am I still allowed to say that?
01:43:26.000 --> 01:43:27.600
I mean, you can.
01:43:27.680 --> 01:43:29.439
It's gonna be a little odd.
01:43:30.239 --> 01:43:31.760
I'm gonna have to find a new one.
01:43:32.000 --> 01:43:33.279
Yeah, we'll figure something out.
01:43:35.039 --> 01:43:37.279
Now we're gonna close the episode along the core.
01:43:37.439 --> 01:43:43.119
We just had that fire episode, and now we're gonna be like, oh Keith! We don't have a closer yet.
01:43:43.199 --> 01:43:44.000
We don't have a closer yet.
01:43:44.079 --> 01:43:44.720
I don't have a closer.
01:43:46.159 --> 01:43:49.199
Remember that eternity is for the beautiful, eternity is for the timeless.
01:43:49.359 --> 01:43:51.520
Eternity is for those who walk with God.
01:43:51.600 --> 01:43:52.479
And everyone's welcome.
01:43:52.640 --> 01:43:53.520
Until the next time.