00:00:09.199 --> 00:00:14.000
Hello and welcome back to the Empower Her Business Podcast.
00:00:14.080 --> 00:00:29.440
I'm your host, Lynette Cottrell, founder of Empower Her Bookkeeping and Advisory, where I support women in building businesses, they don't just generate revenue, but actually support the life they're creating.
00:00:29.679 --> 00:00:40.719
I guide female founders with compassionate accounting to eliminate guilt, shame, and avoidance around their finances and embrace relief.
00:00:41.200 --> 00:00:42.640
This is my calling.
00:00:42.799 --> 00:01:01.280
In this space, the Empower Her Business Podcast, is dedicated to bringing expert advice, resources, solutions, and support to Black women founders who were bold enough and brave enough to step into this business journey.
00:01:01.520 --> 00:01:05.920
So welcome to another episode of our financial roundtable.
00:01:06.079 --> 00:01:16.319
You know, in the past we've dedicated this space and this time to talk about numbers, revenue, profit, taxes, and strategy.
00:01:16.799 --> 00:01:21.280
But behind every number, behind every business is a woman.
00:01:21.519 --> 00:01:29.200
A woman holding a vision, responsibility, growth, and sometimes a weight that isn't always seen.
00:01:29.359 --> 00:01:36.079
So today we're stepping into this space differently and taking you beyond the numbers.
00:01:36.400 --> 00:01:41.760
This is our exhale session of the financial roundtable.
00:01:42.239 --> 00:01:52.719
So our fabulous superstars that you are so familiar with by now, Rhonda, Nikki, and Monique are going to empower us to exhale today.
00:01:52.959 --> 00:02:08.240
We will be talking about mental health, protecting your peace, being supported, redefining what wealth really means and the pivots that shape who we become, not just as business owners, but as women.
00:02:08.719 --> 00:02:18.479
Because success isn't just about what you build, it's about whether you get to experience peace while building it.
00:02:18.800 --> 00:02:28.240
So these incredible women, each accomplished in their own right, are bringing honesty, wisdom, and lived experience into this space.
00:02:28.560 --> 00:02:32.000
Collectively, we decided that we all need a break.
00:02:32.159 --> 00:02:38.159
We need an exhale session after tax season, and it's not really over.
00:02:39.360 --> 00:02:43.199
So, audience, we're delighted to have you here with us today.
00:02:43.520 --> 00:02:59.360
And my hope for this exhale session is that you hear something that feels familiar, something that reminds you that you're not alone, and something that gives you permission to define success in a way that truly honors who you are.
00:03:00.319 --> 00:03:06.560
So let's take a breath and step into this conversation.
00:03:07.039 --> 00:03:09.199
Ladies, welcome.
00:03:11.120 --> 00:03:13.840
So let's start with this for each of you.
00:03:14.159 --> 00:03:18.639
In one sentence, who are you outside of what you do?
00:03:18.800 --> 00:03:20.719
And I'll start with you, Rhonda.
00:03:20.800 --> 00:03:23.840
Who are you outside of the work that you do?
00:03:24.080 --> 00:03:25.840
I'm a woman that loves life.
00:03:27.599 --> 00:03:29.280
That is my one sentence.
00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:31.199
I love that.
00:03:32.159 --> 00:03:34.240
And I love those colors you have on.
00:03:34.319 --> 00:03:35.199
I love those flowers.
00:03:35.280 --> 00:03:36.240
Oh, thank you.
00:03:36.639 --> 00:03:37.919
It gives me life.
00:03:38.080 --> 00:03:39.360
Now we go to Nikki.
00:03:39.439 --> 00:03:43.360
Nikki, who are you outside of what you do?
00:03:44.479 --> 00:03:54.639
I'm a woman of faith, wife and mother, and someone who values peace, grow and move a meaningful connection.
00:03:54.879 --> 00:03:55.840
That is me.
00:03:56.159 --> 00:03:56.879
Love that.
00:03:57.199 --> 00:03:57.919
Love that.
00:03:58.319 --> 00:04:01.680
Monique, who are you outside of what you do?
00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:07.280
Honestly, I could take Nikki's words and just repeat it verbatim.
00:04:07.759 --> 00:04:08.800
Everything she just said.
00:04:08.960 --> 00:04:10.879
That's that is as well.
00:04:11.520 --> 00:04:12.800
Wonderful, wonderful.
00:04:13.360 --> 00:04:15.759
So I have a question for you guys.
00:04:16.160 --> 00:04:21.839
Um, as a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
00:04:22.160 --> 00:04:25.360
And is it in any way related to what you're doing now?
00:04:25.519 --> 00:04:33.759
And you know, we have uh uh I don't know about you guys, but I know I went through like iterations of what I wanted to be when I grew up.
00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:40.399
So I would like for you guys to share with the audience a little about what you wanted to be when you grew up.
00:04:41.439 --> 00:04:43.519
Rhonda, I start with you.
00:04:44.399 --> 00:04:53.920
So you know what's funny is I can't say that I wanted to be an accountant when I was younger, but I always loved numbers.
00:04:54.160 --> 00:05:00.800
So when I was a kid, my dad would, you know, whatever reason he needed to go to the office supply store, I always wanted to go.
00:05:01.360 --> 00:05:08.480
And not because, you know, you know, just wanted to pick up office supplies, but I like I loved playing with the calculators and the cash register.
00:05:09.920 --> 00:05:12.079
Of all things, it's so funny.
00:05:12.959 --> 00:05:25.600
But, you know, I didn't realize until later on in life that okay, that's showing your pequenity to want to work with work with numbers and specifically money around it.
00:05:26.079 --> 00:05:28.240
I mean, I always enjoyed playing with that kind of stuff.
00:05:28.319 --> 00:05:33.439
I didn't know I wanted to be an accountant until late high school years when I took a class.
00:05:33.680 --> 00:05:35.600
But but yeah, that's where it started.
00:05:35.920 --> 00:05:38.160
Oh, wonderful! I love that story.
00:05:38.399 --> 00:05:39.680
How about you, Nikki?
00:05:39.839 --> 00:05:41.759
What did you want to be when you grew up?
00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:43.920
I wanted to be a lawyer.
00:05:44.240 --> 00:05:56.480
Ah but the funny thing was that um I will always give advice to my dad regarding his financing because it had a consortium company.
00:05:56.639 --> 00:05:56.959
Uh-huh.
00:05:57.199 --> 00:05:59.600
So I will always give him advice.
00:05:59.680 --> 00:06:02.879
Say, oh, you don't have to do this, you have to do this way, you know.
00:06:03.040 --> 00:06:06.959
And one day my mother told me, I don't think you're gonna be a lawyer.
00:06:07.279 --> 00:06:09.279
I'm seeing you as an accountant.
00:06:10.800 --> 00:06:22.560
Yeah, so and I was really mad that day, and I said, No, I want to be a lawyer because I want to, you know, I want to protect women, I want to do this, and she was like, nope, I'm not seeing you like that.
00:06:22.800 --> 00:06:24.720
And finally, she was right.
00:06:24.959 --> 00:06:35.600
So when I reached, I when I graduated from high school, for some reason I decided to be an accountant.
00:06:36.160 --> 00:06:37.920
For some reason, huh?
00:06:39.920 --> 00:06:41.759
Just out the blue, huh?
00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:44.480
Yes, out of blue, I decided.
00:06:44.639 --> 00:06:46.560
Yeah, she was right.
00:06:46.800 --> 00:06:56.079
So I I you know I like numbers, I like to give advice, yes, and it goes hand in hand, right?
00:06:57.519 --> 00:06:59.519
Nice Monique, what about you?
00:06:59.600 --> 00:07:01.519
What did you want to be when you grew up?
00:07:01.839 --> 00:07:16.639
When I was growing up, I wanted to be the boss, it didn't matter, it didn't matter over what over I have pictures of myself as a little girl, and I'm just looking like because I said so.
00:07:17.279 --> 00:07:17.759
Right?
00:07:18.240 --> 00:07:21.519
And it has truly tracked with me throughout life.
00:07:21.759 --> 00:07:26.480
Like, you know, there are some people that just innately have leadership qualities.
00:07:26.720 --> 00:07:31.040
I cannot sit in a room and like sit in the back and be quiet.
00:07:31.199 --> 00:07:42.959
Like it's just I'm gonna see something, I have to say something, and over time I've tried to pull back, but that whole I want to be the boss, it just it just takes over.
00:07:44.079 --> 00:07:45.199
I love that.
00:07:45.439 --> 00:07:46.560
I love that.
00:07:48.560 --> 00:07:49.839
Awesome, awesome.
00:07:50.079 --> 00:07:56.399
Okay, next we're gonna talk a little bit about a little more about Beyond the Work.
00:07:57.680 --> 00:08:04.319
So, what is something people would be surprised to learn about you beyond your professional role?
00:08:04.639 --> 00:08:07.040
Nikki, I'll start with you this time.
00:08:10.720 --> 00:08:21.839
So I would say that beyond what I do, my work, um I like quiet um environment.
00:08:22.879 --> 00:08:40.879
And I would say I like to be around with my kids and you know, um I like reading, so that is why I really like to read, you know, and keep thinking about, you know, what to do next.
00:08:41.200 --> 00:08:42.480
Got it, got it.
00:08:42.879 --> 00:08:46.480
You're a reader and you like your peace and quiet.
00:08:47.759 --> 00:08:49.519
What about you, Rhonda?
00:08:50.159 --> 00:08:54.080
What is something people would be surprised to learn about you?
00:08:54.799 --> 00:09:00.799
Surprised to learn about people who didn't, who don't know me outside of work.
00:09:01.120 --> 00:09:06.240
Um, I used to be a boot camp instructor um for some time.
00:09:06.480 --> 00:09:14.399
I mean, that was not my official profession, but outside of working, then that was where I was going in the evenings.
00:09:14.559 --> 00:09:18.399
Like it, it's time for us to work, it's time for us to work out.
00:09:18.559 --> 00:09:21.039
Um, and I did it for years, I loved it.
00:09:21.200 --> 00:09:25.279
Um, but now I spend most of my free time.
00:09:25.360 --> 00:09:28.480
If I'm gonna be working out, I love step class.
00:09:28.720 --> 00:09:33.360
It is my absolute, hey, nothing's gonna get in the way of this.
00:09:33.519 --> 00:09:35.519
Here's where we're going, this is what we're doing.
00:09:35.679 --> 00:09:39.279
I feel like it's a good brain activity, but it's almost always fun.
00:09:39.679 --> 00:09:44.639
You always bring on the music, bring out my step, bring out my friends, let's go.
00:09:46.240 --> 00:09:47.679
Nice, nice.
00:09:48.240 --> 00:09:49.600
What about you, Monique?
00:09:49.679 --> 00:09:53.200
What's something people would be surprised to learn about you?
00:09:54.399 --> 00:09:55.679
Uh, I don't know.
00:09:55.840 --> 00:10:06.799
I don't know if it's a surprise, but um I don't think people realize how huge um my spiritual life is.
00:10:07.519 --> 00:10:15.759
Like it is um it's something that even as I run my business, like that's the foundation of it.
00:10:16.320 --> 00:10:28.240
So um it it plays a like when I when I'm dealing with clients, the decisions that I make, there is just such this huge role where I'm I'm going to God about everything.
00:10:28.399 --> 00:10:29.519
I'm going to God about you.
00:10:29.600 --> 00:10:32.320
I'm going to God about you know my next decision.
00:10:32.559 --> 00:10:38.799
And so it is a huge part of my life that I don't um speak about all the time.
00:10:39.360 --> 00:10:41.759
I mean it it is a conversation that ends up coming up.
00:10:41.840 --> 00:10:52.720
And I noticed and realized even within my business with my clients, and especially a lot of my female clients, when they do find out that piece, it's kind of like a sigh of relief, like, okay, I'm with the right person.
00:10:53.679 --> 00:11:01.759
You know, I don't bring it out at first, but it just it does come out as a part of me because it is it it's another piece.
00:11:02.080 --> 00:11:02.799
Got it.
00:11:03.039 --> 00:11:05.919
All right, wonderful, wonderful, beautiful.
00:11:06.240 --> 00:11:07.360
All right, Rhonda.
00:11:07.440 --> 00:11:08.480
This one goes to you.
00:11:08.639 --> 00:11:15.440
What does a day that feels peaceful and aligned look like for you now?
00:11:17.039 --> 00:11:20.639
Peaceful and aligned day starting out on the right foot.
00:11:20.960 --> 00:11:21.279
Right.
00:11:21.360 --> 00:11:25.600
I I usually my calendar doesn't open up until about 10 a.m.
00:11:26.480 --> 00:11:30.399
So before that time, I usually get up about 6:30 or so.
00:11:30.720 --> 00:11:36.799
But this is my my time of quiet, my time of peace, where I'm getting up, I'm reading.
00:11:36.960 --> 00:11:40.720
I have whatever devotional is in that I'm on at the particular moment.
00:11:40.799 --> 00:11:41.519
I do that.
00:11:41.759 --> 00:11:47.759
I've been on this challenge lately of doing my push-ups after when I get out of the bed, it's time to do my push-ups.
00:11:48.000 --> 00:11:49.279
However many we're getting to.
00:11:49.360 --> 00:11:52.320
But that's our day is is getting started out.
00:11:52.480 --> 00:11:58.240
Um, if it's nice outside, I like to go and take a walk and then start to ease into the day.
00:11:58.320 --> 00:12:10.480
But if I don't have time to myself before we get started, I don't I don't want to think about work until, you know, until it's a good, until I have gotten past all of the things that I wanted to do for me before we get into that.
00:12:10.720 --> 00:12:13.360
So that's uh that's what a peaceful day looks like for me.
00:12:13.440 --> 00:12:14.399
It starts outright.
00:12:14.639 --> 00:12:15.120
Right.
00:12:15.360 --> 00:12:18.399
Now, have you always started your days like that?
00:12:19.519 --> 00:12:20.960
Not always.
00:12:21.120 --> 00:12:32.159
The older I get, the more and more I put priority on that, just because I realize how important it is and how easy it is for people to kind of take away your time with whatever their priorities are.
00:12:32.320 --> 00:12:44.480
I decided, you know, I gotta focus on what's going to be best for me and my mo my growth and my development rather than putting everything else in front of in front of that.
00:12:44.879 --> 00:12:49.440
Like there's a time and place for taking care of everybody else, but I can't pour from an empty glass.
00:12:49.519 --> 00:12:52.720
If I don't take care of myself, I cannot take care of anyone else.
00:12:53.679 --> 00:12:55.200
I love that, I love that.
00:12:55.360 --> 00:12:56.559
Wonderful, wonderful.
00:12:56.799 --> 00:12:58.159
What about you, Nikki?
00:12:58.240 --> 00:13:03.840
What does a day that feels peaceful and aligned look like for you?
00:13:05.360 --> 00:13:20.000
When I'm not rushing and when I'm clear in my mind and I'm grounded with faith, and also when I'm I have my family present with me.
00:13:20.879 --> 00:13:31.600
So yeah, so so that is how I recall my day um peaceful because I'm not moving, I'm not under pressing.
00:13:31.919 --> 00:13:32.960
Got it, got it.
00:13:33.120 --> 00:13:37.519
So you're not rushing and you're spending quality time with your family.
00:13:38.320 --> 00:13:40.240
Yeah, that sounds peaceful.
00:13:40.480 --> 00:13:42.080
What about you, Monique?
00:13:42.879 --> 00:13:53.519
Um, a peaceful day for me is getting up and having that cup of coffee and not accepting phone calls.
00:13:54.080 --> 00:14:03.360
Everybody else's, you know, problems and issues, and when I have a quiet day of phone calls, that in and of itself is peaceful.
00:14:03.440 --> 00:14:12.000
I will accept two calls outside of the home because my husband and my son's here, but my two girls, they're in different, you know, states right now.
00:14:12.159 --> 00:14:17.200
So I get their calls and that puts me at peace once I know they're good after that.
00:14:17.679 --> 00:14:20.159
If I don't hear from anybody else, I'm good.
00:14:22.080 --> 00:14:22.639
I'm good.
00:14:22.960 --> 00:14:23.440
Got you.
00:14:23.600 --> 00:14:24.159
I love it.
00:14:24.240 --> 00:14:30.720
I love the way that you all um prioritize your teeth as you start your day.
00:14:30.799 --> 00:14:45.519
That's very important because a lot of times when we can jump into a day, I remember um when I was um in the phase of raising my kids, how I would just jump into the morning, right?
00:14:45.600 --> 00:14:49.039
There was no me time at the beginning of the day.
00:14:49.200 --> 00:14:51.360
That concept never even entered my mind.
00:14:51.440 --> 00:14:54.320
It was like, okay, what do I need to do for everybody else?
00:14:54.639 --> 00:14:57.360
And now I'm like you, Rhonda.
00:14:57.600 --> 00:15:04.639
I have, there's just a certain number of hours in the beginning of my day that's for me.
00:15:04.799 --> 00:15:11.360
It's for me to make sure that the way I step into the world, I step as a whole person.
00:15:11.519 --> 00:15:18.399
Like I'm not going out there and interacting with other people and I'm frazzled and I haven't centered and grounded myself.
00:15:18.480 --> 00:15:26.240
So I I love to hear that you guys are, you know, taking the time to make sure that you do that for you.
00:15:26.720 --> 00:15:32.960
And like you said, Monique, there are some days when the phone, this phone calls are not going to be answered.
00:15:33.120 --> 00:15:33.919
They'll be all right.
00:15:34.000 --> 00:15:35.519
I get to them later.
00:15:36.240 --> 00:15:45.679
You know, the other night I was scrolling uh through social media, and I don't know why Bruce Lee was um in my algorithm.
00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:53.200
Ah but he was, and he was being interviewed, and they asked him a question related to peace.
00:15:53.279 --> 00:16:00.799
Uh and I can't remember the way the question was phrased, but he said, Um you have to choose peace.
00:16:01.200 --> 00:16:06.960
And when he said that, I was like, absolutely like you have to choose, right?
00:16:07.039 --> 00:16:13.679
So when I do decline, like that is seriously me choosing peace.
00:16:13.840 --> 00:16:19.039
When we wake up and we choose to take that walk or whatever it is, it's a choice.
00:16:19.200 --> 00:16:26.320
We can either jump into the chaos or like Nikki said, I think it was Nikki that mentioned being slow, you know, into that day.
00:16:26.639 --> 00:16:26.799
Yeah.
00:16:27.039 --> 00:16:30.879
Well, that's a choice that we have to intentionally make.
00:16:32.399 --> 00:16:35.840
Yeah, because the world's not gonna give you that peace.
00:16:36.320 --> 00:16:38.559
You have to create that peace for yourself.
00:16:38.799 --> 00:16:39.360
Absolutely.
00:16:40.399 --> 00:16:41.519
Yes, yes.
00:16:42.159 --> 00:16:43.759
All right, love that.
00:16:43.840 --> 00:16:47.679
So let's talk a little bit about mental health and pressure.
00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:55.200
As high achieving women, how has work impacted your mental and emotional well-being over time?
00:16:56.000 --> 00:16:57.759
And I want to start with you on this one.
00:16:59.120 --> 00:17:09.119
Wow, if you had asked me this question two weeks ago about mental health, probably would have been on a ledge.
00:17:09.680 --> 00:17:12.319
Don't ask me nothing about mental health.
00:17:13.200 --> 00:17:22.160
But um, you know, over time, it's kind of like this roller coaster, it has been this roller coaster um thing because it depends on the phase in life.
00:17:22.319 --> 00:17:32.319
Um, when I was trying to work and I had young kids, well, that was just like, you know, again, I'm I'm on the edge, I'm at the edge of the cliff, ready to jump off.
00:17:32.559 --> 00:17:36.079
But as we just um talked about peace, right?
00:17:36.240 --> 00:17:38.400
And how yes, you have to choose it.
00:17:38.559 --> 00:17:44.960
And so for me, as a tax preparer and an accountant, I take spring break off with my kids, right?
00:17:45.200 --> 00:17:47.599
And and we do, we we will go somewhere.
00:17:47.759 --> 00:17:55.680
And yes, it is the worst time to take off because the clients are like, what are you doing taking you know a week off before the tax deadline?
00:17:56.079 --> 00:17:58.400
But no, I I need that pause.
00:17:58.640 --> 00:18:04.880
And because everyone else, there there are so many people that will come at the last minute, say, I need this done, I need this done.
00:18:05.119 --> 00:18:09.440
I make my cutoff March 31st because I'm not killing myself.
00:18:09.599 --> 00:18:13.519
I've learned I can't kill myself right up to that deadline.
00:18:13.680 --> 00:18:15.759
I do take that step back.
00:18:15.920 --> 00:18:27.119
Um, and so again, it's something that when when we see that we're going through these periods of yes, immense pressure, it's up to us to say, I need to pause.
00:18:27.440 --> 00:18:29.680
And I have learned that in life.
00:18:29.839 --> 00:18:37.119
Now, my kids are older, so it's easier for me because I feel like when you have like younger kids, it's hard to pause.
00:18:37.279 --> 00:18:40.079
Their schedules don't align with yours.
00:18:40.319 --> 00:18:50.720
But when I am, you know, today, I do have to intentionally pause because I I've sit my my eyes will be bloodshot red, it'll start twitching.
00:18:50.799 --> 00:18:54.160
I get issues in my jaw, it's it's a whole thing.
00:18:55.839 --> 00:18:57.759
Like your body starts talking to you, right?
00:18:58.000 --> 00:19:04.480
It does, it's like if you won't you won't just automatically, you know, act right.
00:19:04.640 --> 00:19:09.920
I'm gonna send you some signals to help you figure out you need to change some things.
00:19:10.160 --> 00:19:10.720
Yep, yep.
00:19:12.720 --> 00:19:17.920
All of the signals, exactly, and that's key too, because a lot of times we cannot listen.
00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:20.319
We can be like, oh, I'm just gonna do this one more thing.
00:19:20.480 --> 00:19:23.440
I got headache, but let me go ahead and get this done, right?
00:19:23.599 --> 00:19:26.799
I'm tired, but let me just push through and get this done.
00:19:27.279 --> 00:19:33.279
And then something breaks and you gotta rest, right?
00:19:33.359 --> 00:19:35.279
Your body forces you to rest.
00:19:35.359 --> 00:19:39.039
So, yeah, it's a lot better when we listen to those signals.
00:19:39.200 --> 00:19:39.359
Yeah.
00:19:39.599 --> 00:19:40.880
What about you, Rhonda?
00:19:41.039 --> 00:19:46.960
How has um work impacted your mental health or emotional well-being over time?
00:19:47.440 --> 00:19:49.519
And has it changed over time?
00:19:50.000 --> 00:19:52.480
I feel like it definitely has changed over time.
00:19:52.640 --> 00:20:03.440
And the older I get and the more intentional I try to be about protecting my own peace and my own sanity, then it's just gotten better over time.
00:20:03.680 --> 00:20:18.400
I remember earlier in my career when I was still working for others and there was, it felt like there was a lot of stress, especially, you know, at that particular phase of my life, I was um a manager and I had people across the country.
00:20:18.640 --> 00:20:23.200
And you start thinking that anytime things go wrong, then it's a reflection on you.
00:20:23.279 --> 00:20:31.200
And I used to take a lot of that things personal and recognizing that, oh, you know, how much stress it was adding to my life unnecessarily.
00:20:31.680 --> 00:20:45.839
And then as I transitioned out of that role and then eventually out of the company completely and moved into my own working environment, I realized that I was taking some of those same habits and bringing them into working for myself.
00:20:46.000 --> 00:20:46.319
Yeah.
00:20:46.559 --> 00:20:56.319
And, you know, it takes a while before you recognize, like, wait a minute, the stress that I'm that I'm experiencing, I brought it on myself.
00:20:56.480 --> 00:20:56.720
Yeah.
00:20:56.880 --> 00:21:04.000
And what's funny is there was one day that I went to the gym and I was talking to one of my buddies there, and she was asking me about how the day was.
00:21:04.160 --> 00:21:08.559
And I said, well, you know, it's been, it's been a little, it was, it was a long day.
00:21:08.720 --> 00:21:11.599
And she knows that that I am self-employed.
00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:16.880
And she's like, well, sounds like you, you uh you brought all the these is this a stress of your own doing?
00:21:17.039 --> 00:21:20.079
And you know, she said it jokingly, but I realized I was like, you know, but you're so right.
00:21:20.559 --> 00:21:21.759
You're so right.
00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:25.839
Every bit of this is something I've I've established for myself.
00:21:26.079 --> 00:21:30.319
And to realize, like, hey, this is not, this is not the way that I need to function.
00:21:30.559 --> 00:21:44.720
And from really from that period on, just that random conversation with a friend, I said, okay, I gotta be more intentional about setting my own standards for what this looks like and how I'm gonna protect my own sanity, my own peace.
00:21:44.960 --> 00:21:47.759
And ever since that time, it has been so much better.
00:21:47.839 --> 00:21:50.400
You start realizing, like, no, I don't need to answer calls.
00:21:50.559 --> 00:21:52.240
I don't need to take quick cut note.
00:21:52.319 --> 00:21:54.400
If you want to be on my schedule, you you'd plan it.
00:21:54.480 --> 00:21:55.359
You book time.
00:21:55.680 --> 00:21:58.240
This is the dedicated time that you have to speak with me.
00:21:58.400 --> 00:21:59.759
You're not gonna throw off my schedule because.
00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:01.839
Hey, I got an emergency right now.
00:22:01.920 --> 00:22:03.039
That's not my problem.
00:22:04.160 --> 00:22:06.559
I just started realizing that that is okay, Rhonda.
00:22:06.640 --> 00:22:07.119
It's okay.
00:22:08.720 --> 00:22:18.319
Isn't it amazing the habits that we carry over into our entrepreneur journey that it it really takes something to make us look at it, right?
00:22:18.400 --> 00:22:20.799
Like you said, for you it was that conversation.
00:22:21.119 --> 00:22:32.960
But it's not a natural process that we move from being an employee to being an entrepreneur, and then we just naturally change everything.
00:22:33.279 --> 00:22:38.640
We usually either keep the same schedule or even work more hours, right?
00:22:38.880 --> 00:22:41.279
Like we get up earlier, we work later, right?
00:22:41.519 --> 00:22:51.440
And there's there's like no line between, oh, I need to take a lunch break now, or I need to stop and sit down and eat dinner away from my computer.
00:22:52.000 --> 00:22:55.279
So it takes it's it really is a learning process.
00:22:55.359 --> 00:23:02.880
And and I say it's one of those, I think there's a lot of nuances to being an entrepreneur that are not spoken about.
00:23:03.119 --> 00:23:08.960
So when you when you start being an entrepreneur, there's a lot you have to learn on your own, right?
00:23:09.279 --> 00:23:14.559
Because they're not spoken, no one says you you get to set your own schedule.
00:23:14.720 --> 00:23:18.319
Now you can set your schedule for the person you are.
00:23:18.400 --> 00:23:23.839
Like if you're a morning person, you can set your schedule that you do your work in the morning.
00:23:24.000 --> 00:23:31.680
If you're an evening person, you can set your schedule to do your work in the evening because you couldn't do that as employee, right?
00:23:32.000 --> 00:23:35.039
So there are things like that that I'm with you around.
00:23:35.119 --> 00:23:37.440
You have to learn that, okay, wait a minute.
00:23:37.759 --> 00:23:41.440
I am in control of this, so let me make some changes.
00:23:42.319 --> 00:23:42.960
Right.
00:23:43.519 --> 00:23:48.400
So, Mickey, um, can you share something you've learned about protecting your peace?
00:23:48.720 --> 00:24:00.000
Have has there has that been something that you had to work on or situations that made you realize, okay, it's time for me to do something differently to protect my peace?
00:24:03.759 --> 00:24:08.799
I always say that what um I learned from my first job.
00:24:08.960 --> 00:24:26.079
My first job was very tough because um I worked uh in the bank, the financial institute, and we have different we do not have different software for um for the accounting or and the bank transaction, the bank activity.
00:24:26.160 --> 00:24:29.920
So we have only one software, so everything is so true.
00:24:30.160 --> 00:24:38.240
Um so we have some moments that we have to you know sleep at work.
00:24:38.880 --> 00:24:48.720
Oh wow, yes, to get yes, yes, to to close the year, yes, yes, um, because it was a process, right?
00:24:48.960 --> 00:24:53.599
So we can close if we have to do some transaction, the back date.
00:24:53.680 --> 00:25:00.160
You know, we cannot do any backday when the bank is open, when the activity is flowing.
00:25:00.319 --> 00:25:20.079
Uh we have to wait for the day to be closed before we open the system to do some adjustments, and you know that was that is how we would, you know, maybe stay there for two days, three days, and that is where I learned how to drink coffee.
00:25:21.680 --> 00:25:38.799
I took a lot of coffee, so when I leave that job, the first thing I want, the first thing I needed to do was to adjust what uh I was like first, I won't work anymore in the in the in the financial exit for the peace of mind.
00:25:38.960 --> 00:25:41.039
I say that one is done.
00:25:41.200 --> 00:25:47.920
Yeah, the second thing that I have I have to adjust was the the time management.
00:25:49.200 --> 00:25:52.799
So I decided to have to set up my time.
00:25:52.960 --> 00:26:06.160
I said, okay, if the work is for eight for eight to five, I have to do everything that will happen between those days between those times.
00:26:06.240 --> 00:26:16.640
I know that I have my lunch time and everything, so I learned to manage that, and the best way I learned to manage my time between those was to make a list.
00:26:17.519 --> 00:26:22.240
So I start with the list of the stuff that I have to do for the day.
00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:24.559
When it's done, it's done.
00:26:24.799 --> 00:26:36.480
If there's something that comes, like we sometimes we have urgency, so I will I will know how to balance between those, but after five, I'm done.
00:26:37.680 --> 00:26:41.119
No, we my weekend is for my family, yeah.
00:26:41.440 --> 00:26:50.640
Yeah, so that is how I learned was I think it was the best way, was the best thing that I have implemented for myself, right?
00:26:50.960 --> 00:26:56.559
And when I started being on my own, I continued that as well.
00:26:56.640 --> 00:27:01.599
And uh my customer know Nikki worked from eight to five.
00:27:03.200 --> 00:27:06.000
After five, she's not with you, yeah.
00:27:06.559 --> 00:27:11.359
And then the weekend, she's not with you, yeah.
00:27:11.599 --> 00:27:19.680
And I make my so I make sure that everything is done on time, yeah, so I don't have to do any overtime.
00:27:19.920 --> 00:27:23.519
Yes, love it, setting those boundaries around the time.
00:27:24.559 --> 00:27:37.599
Oh, I I just I can't imagine having to sleep at work, you know, having to be there so late that you have to sleep there, then get up and keep working because the system was so connected to everything.
00:27:37.680 --> 00:27:40.559
But yeah, I can see I can see how that would work.
00:27:40.720 --> 00:27:50.160
I remember working in uh my first um when I first started in accounting, my first job was working for a CPA firm.
00:27:50.640 --> 00:27:55.039
And I worked for the CPA firm for one year and then I got out.
00:27:55.359 --> 00:27:56.319
That's what I call it.
00:27:56.480 --> 00:28:02.960
I got out because in my experience, they kind of wanted to own your life.
00:28:03.119 --> 00:28:11.519
It was kind of like they call it paying your dues, and paying your dues was you're available whenever we need you to meet whatever deadline.
00:28:11.680 --> 00:28:13.519
You didn't have a weekend, right?
00:28:14.000 --> 00:28:18.640
That was like that was like you didn't have a weekend, you didn't have a nighttime, right?
00:28:18.720 --> 00:28:27.839
It was kind of like whatever needs to be done within whatever time frame we've promised this client, this audit would be completed.
00:28:28.000 --> 00:28:31.920
That's when it's need to be, that's the timeline needs to be completed in.
00:28:32.160 --> 00:28:36.319
So you you weren't allowed to say, Well, I'm tired, I need to go home.
00:28:36.480 --> 00:28:37.279
Uh-uh-uh.
00:28:37.519 --> 00:28:39.440
I don't want to come in on the weekend.
00:28:39.680 --> 00:28:43.440
We have deadline, so we need everybody to come in and get this done.
00:28:43.599 --> 00:28:45.200
I was like, you know what?
00:28:45.519 --> 00:28:47.119
This is not the life for me.
00:28:47.200 --> 00:28:50.160
I I can't see myself ever enjoying this.
00:28:50.400 --> 00:28:53.359
So let me switch and do something else.
00:28:53.839 --> 00:28:57.920
So definitely figuring out things and setting those boundaries.
00:28:58.160 --> 00:28:59.680
Wonderful, wonderful.
00:29:00.400 --> 00:29:06.079
So I often talk to my clients about um, we're not meant to do this alone.
00:29:06.160 --> 00:29:21.519
And I find that it can be a struggle, especially for women, to ask for help or support when we need it, as opposed to um plowing through and getting things done.
00:29:21.839 --> 00:29:30.720
And especially I find it for black women because we've had to figure so much out with so little support, right?
00:29:30.880 --> 00:29:41.200
We don't we we've we've historically gotten so little support from the system that we've had to figure it out anyway, because it's like, okay, I'm not gonna stop here and just drop dead.
00:29:41.359 --> 00:29:43.359
So you're not gonna help me.
00:29:43.440 --> 00:29:46.079
Let me find another way to get this done.
00:29:47.279 --> 00:30:01.759
But that can turn into us being um not being able to see when we should ask for help when there is support available, and understanding that we're not meant to do it all along.
00:30:02.000 --> 00:30:13.759
So, as an entrepreneur and as a woman running your own business, what did you have to learn, or did you have an experience?
00:30:13.920 --> 00:30:20.480
Did you have to unlearn um how to ask for help, or was that something that came easily to you?
00:30:21.680 --> 00:30:23.519
Rhonda, I start with you.
00:30:25.359 --> 00:30:36.559
Um I feel like asking for help has been a piece that was already kind of incorporated into my career before I started my own business.
00:30:37.039 --> 00:30:42.480
Um, just recognizing, especially in leadership, that you can't you can't do everything.
00:30:42.799 --> 00:30:47.519
Matter of fact, you don't have time to do anything, everything, and you don't know how to do everything.
00:30:47.680 --> 00:30:58.400
You know, like that's why I'm like, I am I am here to both protect my team and help my team get whatever it is that they need to be successful.
00:30:58.799 --> 00:31:10.960
And having that experience, especially now that I look back upon my career before I started the business, like it helped me to get to a place where you recognize I don't have to go out and try to do all of the things.
00:31:11.200 --> 00:31:13.359
Like there are so many talented people out here in this world.
00:31:13.519 --> 00:31:13.759
Yeah.
00:31:14.079 --> 00:31:14.799
Tap into them.
00:31:15.359 --> 00:31:22.799
Tap into I'm good at what I'm good at, but there are a million other people that are excellent at other things.
00:31:23.359 --> 00:31:25.440
And yes, come on, come, come hither.
00:31:25.920 --> 00:31:26.480
Yeah.
00:31:27.039 --> 00:31:28.480
I have a place for you.
00:31:29.759 --> 00:31:40.480
And like the the the longer I am in business, the more I'm trying to figure out what are some of those things, what are the things that I'm doing that I don't need to be doing anymore?
00:31:40.799 --> 00:31:43.839
What are the things that I need to focus on that only I can do?
00:31:44.079 --> 00:31:49.440
And everything else, let me spend my time finding who's gonna be the person that can take this from me.
00:31:49.839 --> 00:31:57.759
In the last couple of years, I felt like it's been really great with finding great folks who can take a lot of things off of my plate.
00:31:57.920 --> 00:32:02.319
And we've added a few more people to my team that's just kind of made it wonderful.
00:32:02.559 --> 00:32:09.759
And you start realizing, like, okay, if you can get it to the point of even 70% of what I was doing, that's great.
00:32:09.920 --> 00:32:10.160
Yeah.
00:32:10.400 --> 00:32:10.720
That's great.
00:32:10.880 --> 00:32:11.920
Take it and run with it.
00:32:12.079 --> 00:32:12.319
Right.
00:32:12.640 --> 00:32:19.200
It does not, it does not add any letting go of this idea because I I I like things to a certain standard, right?
00:32:19.359 --> 00:32:24.160
But trying to let those things go and figure out, okay, what what does the standard need to be?
00:32:24.400 --> 00:32:31.440
And not what does Rhonda think the standard needs to be, but what does the standard, you know, universally speaking, what does that need to be?
00:32:32.160 --> 00:32:43.599
And then let folks thrive where where they can and where they do, and taking some things off of me so that way I can focus on all right, here is just as Nikki was saying earlier, here's the time that I work.
00:32:44.079 --> 00:32:47.440
And in this amount of time, this is what I'm gonna get done because this is all I'm gonna focus on.
00:32:47.519 --> 00:32:49.119
Everything else, prepare the others.
00:32:51.839 --> 00:32:52.640
I love that.
00:32:52.720 --> 00:32:53.440
I love that.
00:32:53.599 --> 00:32:58.000
And you know, you brought us something that I never thought about being in management.
00:32:58.079 --> 00:33:05.599
And when you're in management, you get used to working with others and knowing that, you know, you delegate, right?
00:33:06.319 --> 00:33:22.319
So I think for people who step into the entrepreneur experience and they haven't been in management, so they never had the exercise or the experience with delegating, they've had a position that they had to do everything in that particular position.
00:33:22.480 --> 00:33:26.160
They kind of bring that energy into the entrepreneur journey.
00:33:26.319 --> 00:33:27.279
So I've never thought about that.
00:33:27.440 --> 00:33:27.920
That's hard.
00:33:28.240 --> 00:33:40.000
Yeah, I've never thought about that when I'm working with people that okay, it makes a difference if they've been in management or not, because they've had they've had the experience of it's okay to delegate.
00:33:40.079 --> 00:33:44.799
In fact, it's necessary to delegate because you cannot do it all.
00:33:45.039 --> 00:34:06.079
But if you've been used to working and doing it all, and especially when you're working at companies that don't hire to the correct capacity, like they have one person really doing the job of three people, and if one was you, and then you move into your own business, you tend to really do the same thing, exactly.
00:34:06.319 --> 00:34:13.760
Do the same thing, and then when you look back at that company you used to work for, they've hired three people now to replace you.
00:34:14.400 --> 00:34:21.760
You're like they couldn't hire not even one person, and now that I'm gone, they hired three people, right?
00:34:21.840 --> 00:34:24.239
And they already told me I wasn't doing enough.
00:34:28.079 --> 00:34:29.920
Wonderful, wonderful.
00:34:31.039 --> 00:34:41.199
So, um how has being in supported spaces with other women helped you feel supported in your business?
00:34:43.360 --> 00:34:52.880
I think as with any other type of space that you're in, um having a support group, it's super important, right?
00:34:53.119 --> 00:35:01.519
Um, what first comes to my mind is um the fact that besides the workspace, right, I'm married.
00:35:01.760 --> 00:35:07.280
And so we had started, a couple of us started a Bible study for married couples.
00:35:07.519 --> 00:35:12.559
And we were just like, okay, you know, let's do this and and and just you know, let's see how it goes.
00:35:12.639 --> 00:35:14.639
And we actually loved it.
00:35:14.800 --> 00:35:18.159
And so we finished the reading and we're like, no, we need to continue to do this.
00:35:18.320 --> 00:35:24.159
I mean, the men are saying yes, but you know, they might but they're still saying yes.
00:35:24.320 --> 00:35:43.440
But I and I just I say that to um because when you're in a space of like-minded individuals and you know, you're asking each other the the questions, and some of us have the experiment experience and some of us don't, you're learning from each other, learning from each other's mistakes and and the successes, um, it can only bring you to another level.
00:35:43.679 --> 00:35:53.280
And so I think that um if you can find that support group, it is the best thing that you can do for yourself, for your business.
00:35:53.519 --> 00:35:57.119
Um it's a must, is what I'll say.
00:35:57.199 --> 00:36:26.800
If you don't have that thing like that um within your community, and um, Nikki, so for the woman out there who hasn't um who's still in the phase where she thinks she has to do it all herself, and she hasn't really tapped into a support group or a circle of sisterhood or any type of group for support, um, what would be your your advice to her?
00:36:27.280 --> 00:36:34.320
Like what would be what would you say to her would be the benefit of tapping into that and looking into that?
00:36:36.320 --> 00:36:42.719
So for what I know, me personally, I always uh look for information.
00:36:44.159 --> 00:36:49.360
So, um because I know that information is very important.
00:36:50.079 --> 00:37:30.719
So if you are a woman and you need a support, you are not open up, maybe because you don't want to talk to someone else, I will I will say the best thing to do is to first find yourself, but know what you really need, and then and look and then you can do some research and learn a little more because more you do research, more you open your mind up, and more you are uh uh more you open your mind up, more you you feel comfortable to share what you feel it is.
00:37:31.280 --> 00:37:48.639
So I know that um that is why I would say, you know, we know we have a lot of support out there, and we don't want to open into it sometimes we don't even know, but find yourself first that will guide you.
00:37:49.519 --> 00:38:08.639
Okay, so yeah, I think it's very important too to have you know sisterhood circles and not just sisterhood but also sisters in business, I find is very meaningful because I think it's a different language between an entrepreneur and someone who's not an entrepreneur.
00:38:08.880 --> 00:38:16.480
Um, I find that a lot of women experience that, you know, when you get hit those days where you're like, why am I even doing this?
00:38:16.639 --> 00:38:18.800
You know, I'm just tired of this, right?
00:38:19.039 --> 00:38:26.480
Or you hit an issue or a problem that just breaks you down, you really want to have a safe space to go to to talk about that.
00:38:26.639 --> 00:38:29.440
Just the vent and get it out of your nervous system.
00:38:29.679 --> 00:38:33.039
And you know you're gonna get up the next day and you're gonna figure it out.
00:38:33.119 --> 00:38:36.320
You the solution's gonna come to you, you're gonna work through it.
00:38:36.559 --> 00:38:52.159
But a lot of times when we find ourselves sharing these struggles with people who are not entrepreneurs, it's like we're talking a different language, and they may say something like, Well, go back to work and go back, well, I don't know why you even left that job, right?
00:38:52.400 --> 00:38:55.599
Uh you know, it don't sound like this is gonna work out for you, right?
00:38:55.760 --> 00:38:58.639
And that's not what we need to hear.
00:38:59.039 --> 00:39:08.000
So being in spaces where you're with like-minded women who are going through what you're going through, they understand, they know, yeah, you're just having one of those days, sis.
00:39:08.239 --> 00:39:10.719
Yeah, I'm gonna be an ear, I'm just gonna listen.
00:39:10.960 --> 00:39:12.480
I'm not judging you.
00:39:12.639 --> 00:39:15.199
You don't really need advice, you just need to vent.
00:39:15.280 --> 00:39:21.039
And I and you just need someone to say, Yeah, I see you, I I understand, yeah, that's horrible, right?
00:39:21.440 --> 00:39:24.159
And those safe spaces are very important.
00:39:24.480 --> 00:39:45.360
So I think when I feel when I look at the statistics of black women on businesses that go out of business before we reach year five, I think a big part of that is that we didn't find that safe space to talk to someone and realize, okay, I'm not the only one who has bad days.
00:39:45.760 --> 00:39:54.559
It doesn't mean I need to quit, it just means I need to keep putting one step in front of the other, and the solution's gonna come around the corner.
00:39:54.639 --> 00:39:57.119
So, all right, let me let me figure this out.
00:39:57.360 --> 00:40:01.760
So, yeah, safe spaces are very important, very important.
00:40:03.039 --> 00:40:08.800
So, let's talk a little bit about redefining wealth, and so this one is for you, Rhonda.
00:40:08.880 --> 00:40:14.639
How do you personally define wealth today beyond money?
00:40:16.400 --> 00:40:25.280
Flexibility of time and being able to use your time the way that you want to, is that something that you can never get back?
00:40:25.440 --> 00:40:29.119
Like, I don't care how much money you've got, you cannot buy yourself additional time.
00:40:29.760 --> 00:40:41.840
And I had a couple of friends of mine that told me that it kind of walked along the journey, a long journey from transition of working for others to working for myself.
00:40:42.000 --> 00:40:50.239
And somebody once told me, she said, you know, Rhonda, I am super happy to see that you are living the exact life that you said that you wanted to do.
00:40:50.559 --> 00:40:53.519
But you didn't just talk about it, you actually did it.
00:40:53.840 --> 00:41:05.360
And all the things that I hear you saying now about, oh yeah, I'm gonna go and spend a few months down here with some, you know, whoever it is, family or in a different place of the world, you're you're you're doing that.
00:41:05.599 --> 00:41:06.079
You're doing that.
00:41:06.559 --> 00:41:08.400
You're doing exactly what you said you wanted to do.
00:41:08.639 --> 00:41:13.920
And that when she said that, it was I took a moment and just realized like that's how I define wealth.
00:41:14.559 --> 00:41:19.440
You know, being able to use my time the way I want to.
00:41:20.159 --> 00:41:21.679
And and and leave it at that.
00:41:22.719 --> 00:41:25.440
Yeah, that is very important, isn't it?
00:41:25.519 --> 00:41:36.239
That's very special because I I don't think before I became an entrepreneur that I understood the value of that.
00:41:36.400 --> 00:41:43.599
Like I didn't understand how um my time was being captured by others, right?
00:41:44.000 --> 00:41:50.719
How much time I was giving to doing things for others or building someone else's wealth, right?
00:41:51.199 --> 00:41:55.920
Until I got into my own business and I and and then it it kind of hit me.
00:41:56.079 --> 00:41:58.159
So, yeah, that is very valuable.
00:41:58.320 --> 00:42:04.159
Being having that flexibility to define your own time and own your own time.
00:42:04.480 --> 00:42:05.760
I love that.
00:42:06.239 --> 00:42:08.880
What about for you, Monique?
00:42:09.840 --> 00:42:14.079
How would you personally define wealth today beyond money?
00:42:14.400 --> 00:42:18.960
Um, I I kind of alluded to this a little earlier, but health.
00:42:19.760 --> 00:42:27.199
Because I've experienced, you know, like being an entrepreneur and not having clear boundaries.
00:42:27.360 --> 00:42:38.559
You know, there's things that you guys talked about earlier, which I feel as though there's room for improvement for me because I've created some boundaries, but I don't feel as though I've created enough boundaries.
00:42:38.719 --> 00:42:48.559
So I don't, I it it takes everything inside of me to say I'm not gonna answer that call right now or that message.
00:42:48.639 --> 00:42:53.119
At I have clients that will text at 12, you know, a.m.
00:42:55.760 --> 00:42:56.320
Right, right.
00:42:57.280 --> 00:43:01.039
Because I am just like, let me let me just get it done because then I'll put it aside.
00:43:01.119 --> 00:43:02.320
But there's always something, right?
00:43:02.480 --> 00:43:04.079
So I battle with that a lot.
00:43:04.559 --> 00:43:20.559
And in me, battling with that, my health, like I bought the ring to to show how much how my stress level goes because I like stress has will take forms in my body that is just so horrible.
00:43:20.800 --> 00:43:35.920
And so when I get to this point, especially like you know, in the tax season where I'm like, no, I will go take a walk because I I won't do it, I will not even give myself that time during certain seasons, and my body it will show up in my body.
00:43:36.079 --> 00:43:59.760
So then when I feel it all lifted, it's just like, oh my gosh, like this is so precious, it is so precious for these aches and pains and twitching and you know, everything to not be here, and so that for me is like, thank you, God, like this is wealth, like all my faculties and like the this for.
00:44:00.320 --> 00:44:02.800
Me is well, forget about the money.
00:44:02.880 --> 00:44:07.199
I got my body, yes, yes.
00:44:07.519 --> 00:44:11.440
I love that, definitely worth taking care of, right?
00:44:13.440 --> 00:44:14.800
Absolutely.
00:44:15.039 --> 00:44:21.519
So, Nikki, if you could speak to your first five years in business self, what would you tell her?
00:44:24.639 --> 00:44:35.599
So I would I would say that the first five years of business, we all know that when we started, it's when we start is a little bit difficult.
00:44:35.760 --> 00:44:41.840
You know, we sometimes we we we ask ourselves, wasn't the good decision?
00:44:42.079 --> 00:44:42.639
Yes.
00:44:42.880 --> 00:44:53.519
Yes, so I always say being yourself, so being uh starting your own business is always a good decision.
00:44:53.840 --> 00:45:04.480
So the only thing the thing the only thing you have to learn is that you like Ronda said earlier, you cannot carry everything on yourself.
00:45:04.559 --> 00:45:15.280
You have to you have to um choose what fits you the most and focus on that and don't get distracted.
00:45:15.599 --> 00:45:20.719
Whenever it's hard, the harder it becomes, the stronger you become.
00:45:21.280 --> 00:45:32.239
You know, um if you already understand that you have a good foundation to overpass that five years.
00:45:38.800 --> 00:45:39.440
Right, right.
00:45:39.599 --> 00:45:42.719
Most people don't get there, so they don't get there, yeah.
00:45:42.960 --> 00:45:44.400
So yeah, I hear what you're saying.
00:45:44.559 --> 00:45:55.039
So just know that it's you they're gonna be tough times, but after those tough times, going through those tough times, you're growing and you're getting stronger.
00:45:55.280 --> 00:45:58.800
So look at what you've learned from those tough times.
00:45:59.280 --> 00:46:03.280
And if you keep going forward, you'll make it through that five-year mark.
00:46:03.440 --> 00:46:03.599
Okay.
00:46:04.480 --> 00:46:05.199
Got it.
00:46:05.679 --> 00:46:06.880
What about you, Rhonda?
00:46:06.960 --> 00:46:10.159
What would you say if you could speak to your first five-year self?
00:46:10.400 --> 00:46:11.679
What would you tell her?
00:46:13.199 --> 00:46:16.880
You're exactly where you need to be and keep on going.
00:46:17.199 --> 00:46:29.280
You know, um there I I've told so many people who ask me about just the entrepreneurship journey or what it's what it's like running running your own business.
00:46:29.440 --> 00:46:36.719
I say, you know, I feel like in in a matter of six months, I'll learn more than I learned in 10 years of my career.
00:46:37.199 --> 00:46:43.119
Because there's always something new that you know you didn't know.
00:46:43.199 --> 00:46:52.960
You know, when you are working for someone else, then you are usually focused in a particular area, is your area of expertise.
00:46:53.199 --> 00:47:02.239
But when you are running the business, then you're getting out of more of the technical side of things of okay, I know how to do these tasks.
00:47:02.320 --> 00:47:06.719
And now you're looking more strategically of how, where do I want this business to go?
00:47:07.039 --> 00:47:10.480
And what do I want this to look like five, 10 years from now?
00:47:10.639 --> 00:47:13.199
And what can I be doing now to get to that point?
00:47:13.440 --> 00:47:16.400
And who do I need to align with to be able to get to that point?
00:47:16.800 --> 00:47:21.199
And thinking about things from that perspective rather than okay, I gotta figure out how to do this task.
00:47:21.280 --> 00:47:32.960
And like, yes, you know, when I referred to you earlier about focusing on the things that only I can do, I'm like, I can find somebody to do the task, I can teach them how to do the task, or I can write up standard operating procedures of how to do the task.
00:47:33.199 --> 00:47:34.559
I need to focus on something else.
00:47:35.039 --> 00:47:35.280
Right?
00:47:35.360 --> 00:47:41.760
You know, because if if I am not focused on where this business is going to go, then this business is not going to go anywhere.
00:47:42.159 --> 00:47:42.320
Right.
00:47:42.960 --> 00:47:47.280
It's gonna be stuck in day to day finishing the tasks.
00:47:47.599 --> 00:47:49.039
I'm like, that's not what I'm here for.
00:47:49.280 --> 00:47:50.239
That's not what I'm here for.
00:47:50.320 --> 00:47:51.840
I'm like, yes, I am an advisor.
00:47:51.920 --> 00:47:57.440
However, the strategy needs to be something that I am focused on.
00:47:57.840 --> 00:48:00.719
And I try to work with my clients the same way.
00:48:01.039 --> 00:48:11.280
And especially like if they're whether they're in those early stages or they've kind of gotten beyond that back of all right, well, what are those things that you need to be focusing on to get this business to the next level?
00:48:11.840 --> 00:48:20.320
So I just you know full circle was thinking about what would I tell myself is you're exactly where you need to be right now, but keep on focusing on where you want to be in the future.
00:48:21.119 --> 00:48:22.079
I love that.
00:48:22.239 --> 00:48:27.440
And and that's what people call working on your business versus in your business, right?
00:48:27.679 --> 00:48:28.079
Absolutely.
00:48:28.559 --> 00:48:33.199
In your business, you you at the details, but on your business is a strategy.
00:48:33.360 --> 00:48:34.480
Where are we going?
00:48:34.639 --> 00:48:35.440
I love that.
00:48:35.920 --> 00:48:36.800
What about you, Moni?
00:48:37.199 --> 00:48:40.639
What would you tell your first five year in business self?
00:48:42.000 --> 00:48:45.280
I would tell her to set your boundaries.
00:48:45.440 --> 00:48:48.639
The clients will continue to be there and they will come.
00:48:49.519 --> 00:48:57.119
I I wouldn't have gone through what I've been through if I knew to do that much earlier in the process.
00:48:57.519 --> 00:49:01.519
You know, in those first five years, you want to please everyone and you want to do everything.
00:49:01.760 --> 00:49:04.239
And set those boundaries.
00:49:04.559 --> 00:49:07.199
You can still have a great business, you will still do well.
00:49:07.280 --> 00:49:11.360
If some people leave, that's their business, they need to be your client in the first place.
00:49:11.679 --> 00:49:14.559
But set those boundaries, protect your peace.
00:49:16.239 --> 00:49:18.000
Love that, love that.
00:49:18.719 --> 00:49:19.360
All right.
00:49:21.039 --> 00:49:23.920
What does having an all mean to you now?
00:49:24.000 --> 00:49:28.000
And has that definition changed for you, Rhonda?
00:49:31.599 --> 00:49:33.840
What is having an all now?
00:49:35.760 --> 00:49:36.559
Peace.
00:49:37.039 --> 00:49:39.280
You know, a life of peace.
00:49:39.519 --> 00:49:42.800
And I don't know if that's really changed for me over time.
00:49:43.280 --> 00:49:47.840
Um, even when I was younger, then that was important to me.
00:49:47.920 --> 00:49:52.719
It looked different, but it it was always important to me.
00:49:53.039 --> 00:49:58.159
And at the end of the day, you know, that's what having it all looks like to me.
00:49:58.320 --> 00:50:07.840
Monique was mentioning that earlier, your health, um, being able to get out and take that walk, having the luxury of being able to get out there and and take that walk.
00:50:08.239 --> 00:50:11.679
Um enjoy and enjoying the sunshine and you know the simple things in life.
00:50:11.920 --> 00:50:14.239
Yeah, um, that's what having it all is to me.
00:50:14.400 --> 00:50:15.519
Yes, I love that.
00:50:15.679 --> 00:50:16.079
Love that.
00:50:16.239 --> 00:50:21.519
Nikki, what does having it all look like for you and has that changed over time?
00:50:22.880 --> 00:50:28.079
I always say peace up mine and be able to do what you want to do.
00:50:29.760 --> 00:50:30.559
I love that.
00:50:30.639 --> 00:50:31.920
What about you, mommy?
00:50:32.800 --> 00:50:36.480
Um, having it all has definitely changed for me over time.
00:50:36.639 --> 00:50:46.960
Um, you know, because if you asked me five years ago, then it would have been like, well, I need this much money, I need this car, this house, this, you know, whatever.
00:50:47.280 --> 00:50:58.960
But today, you know, even when I think about being a small business owner myself, um, having it all means to be fulfilled in what I do and what I'm giving, right?
00:50:59.119 --> 00:51:03.519
And so it's what I'm giving to my clients that they walk away feeling better.
00:51:03.760 --> 00:51:13.280
It's also as I grow, you know, my team, like when I see some of the people, they're like, oh no, I understand because of this and that and that.
00:51:13.360 --> 00:51:14.880
I'm like, look at you.
00:51:15.199 --> 00:51:16.800
Like that really makes me happy.
00:51:17.039 --> 00:51:27.360
So being able to, yes, be compensated for what I do, but the fulfilling part is to still be that mentor and to be that resource for individuals.
00:51:27.599 --> 00:51:31.440
That is what having it all um means for me, to me.
00:51:31.679 --> 00:51:32.719
Love it, love it.
00:51:32.960 --> 00:51:37.119
And our final question to all you ladies, and I'll start with you, Rhonda.
00:51:37.519 --> 00:51:41.199
Um, what has surprised you about your entrepreneur journey?
00:51:41.360 --> 00:51:50.639
What have you discovered about yourself, about business, uh, about life as you've gone through this entrepreneur journey that kind of surprised you?
00:51:50.719 --> 00:51:56.000
It was something you didn't expect, or maybe just never took the time to think about.
00:51:56.159 --> 00:51:59.280
Is there something about this journey that surprised you?
00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:02.559
Um I feel like every day there's something that surprises me.
00:52:04.639 --> 00:52:08.639
Right to the point where you just break it.
00:52:09.199 --> 00:52:10.000
Yeah, yeah.
00:52:10.159 --> 00:52:11.119
It's not static.
00:52:11.199 --> 00:52:13.199
It's it's just all something, yeah.
00:52:13.280 --> 00:52:16.079
I get there's gonna be something new every day.
00:52:16.320 --> 00:52:19.519
And if there's not a surprise, then okay, well, what's going on?
00:52:20.639 --> 00:52:22.480
Like, well, what's happening today?
00:52:23.199 --> 00:52:24.400
I get that, definitely.
00:52:24.639 --> 00:52:30.559
But yeah, I guess that's that's one of the things that you know I didn't really expect it.
00:52:30.880 --> 00:52:36.079
And if if you had asked me that same question 10 years ago, that would have been something I'd be afraid of.
00:52:36.480 --> 00:52:40.559
Um, because I was used to knowing how things were gonna go.
00:52:40.800 --> 00:52:44.639
And A plus B equals C, one plus one equals two.
00:52:44.960 --> 00:52:47.039
But I was used to that kind of a world.
00:52:47.199 --> 00:52:50.960
And now we're, you know, one plus one could equal five sometimes.
00:52:51.119 --> 00:52:54.960
And you know, you wake up one day and it's like, oh, that's not what I expected.
00:52:55.039 --> 00:52:56.559
But it's it's part of the excitement.
00:52:56.639 --> 00:53:05.440
Um, part of the excitement of running a business um and learning something new every day, I guess is one of those more exciting things to me.
00:53:05.519 --> 00:53:08.400
It's like, okay, well, what am I gonna learn about today?
00:53:08.639 --> 00:53:10.079
I tell people stories all the time.
00:53:10.159 --> 00:53:12.639
I was like, there are a million ways out here that people make money.
00:53:12.800 --> 00:53:12.960
Yeah.
00:53:13.199 --> 00:53:16.400
And being an accountant, you start to see, you're like, you you do what?
00:53:16.719 --> 00:53:17.119
Right.
00:53:17.360 --> 00:53:20.239
Like I didn't even know that was it does make sense.
00:53:20.800 --> 00:53:26.320
We do need that, but yeah, it's not one of the business that we hear about all the time.
00:53:26.480 --> 00:53:29.119
I guess definitely, yeah.
00:53:29.280 --> 00:53:30.719
What about you, Monique?
00:53:31.199 --> 00:54:02.320
Anything surprised you about you know what has hyped me up and kept me going is I can do all things, and I don't mean it in terms of having to do all things within the business, but there are times um, you know, within this journey, within this path, it's just like, wow, I I got it, I know it, I can do it, I can do all things, and so that is one of the biggest things that um, you know, I trust in and I believe in for myself.
00:54:02.639 --> 00:54:03.599
Got it, got it.
00:54:03.840 --> 00:54:06.960
So so kind of like a reaffirming your greatness.
00:54:07.039 --> 00:54:08.639
You you're seeing your own greatness.
00:54:08.719 --> 00:54:11.039
You're like, wow, I love that.
00:54:11.119 --> 00:54:19.039
Because so many times we we do, we accomplish things and we just let it go past us because we're on to the next.
00:54:19.519 --> 00:54:24.559
And I love that you're able to sit in and claim, okay, I did that.
00:54:24.800 --> 00:54:26.320
Oh, I did that.
00:54:26.480 --> 00:54:27.199
That's wonderful.
00:54:27.360 --> 00:54:28.239
I love that.
00:54:28.400 --> 00:54:29.679
What about you, Nikki?
00:54:29.840 --> 00:54:34.079
Anything about your entrepreneurial journey that surprised you?
00:54:35.360 --> 00:54:47.679
Yeah, is that um I would say that what has surprised me is I didn't so you know something, but you don't you didn't you don't know that you know it.
00:54:48.000 --> 00:54:58.320
So like yeah, so you when you work for somebody or for someone else, you focus on one area, right?
00:54:58.559 --> 00:55:10.239
And when you start on your own, and when you start getting customer, you are facing a lot of um new new things, yeah.
00:55:10.400 --> 00:55:13.519
And the first thing you are afraid, right?
00:55:13.760 --> 00:55:21.039
Because you don't know if you can do it until you have it, and you you can you've started doing it.
00:55:21.679 --> 00:55:24.000
So that is something that has surprised me.
00:55:24.079 --> 00:55:27.440
I was like, so I know a lot of things like that.
00:55:27.599 --> 00:55:31.360
Do I know that I can't do it, yeah.
00:55:31.840 --> 00:55:42.320
And and also the constant uh what is uh you have you you are constantly learning, yes, always in in continued education.
00:55:42.400 --> 00:55:59.760
I would say, you know, you are always in continued education because you are having you have a a lot of the different um different, I would say different situation on each situation you have to learn.
00:55:59.920 --> 00:56:05.280
So because you have to learn, that is how you are gaining a lot of knowledge, yeah.
00:56:05.519 --> 00:56:07.519
So you're learning in real time, right?
00:56:07.679 --> 00:56:12.320
When you real time you're picking up, okay, because you have to figure it out, okay.
00:56:12.400 --> 00:56:13.280
What's yes?
00:56:13.760 --> 00:56:16.960
So okay, I've learned that I've felt that all right now I know how to do that.
00:56:17.039 --> 00:56:17.920
Okay, what's next?
00:56:18.159 --> 00:56:21.199
Okay, yeah, let me learn this, and I got that.
00:56:21.280 --> 00:56:22.320
Yeah, I got that.
00:56:22.400 --> 00:56:31.440
Yeah, I I would definitely say that I on uh I learned that entrepreneurship is a is like a school.
00:56:31.679 --> 00:56:40.880
So when you are a business owner, you are you are you like a teacher and you know that always looks for something new.
00:56:41.039 --> 00:56:43.360
That is why we say you're always in school.
00:56:44.320 --> 00:56:46.400
Yeah, and I love how you share that.
00:56:46.559 --> 00:56:50.079
Yeah, a lot of times we don't know how much we know, right?
00:56:50.639 --> 00:57:00.239
Because if we've been doing one main thing, there's also some um things that go along with that that we we are aware of.
00:57:00.400 --> 00:57:08.480
I always, when I do my self-talk, I tell myself that I am 10 times better than I realize I am, right?
00:57:09.039 --> 00:57:15.840
Because what what I am aware of is probably 10% of what I'm really capable of.
00:57:16.239 --> 00:57:22.960
But like you eloquently put it, but when I get in that situation, then that part of me comes out.
00:57:23.039 --> 00:57:25.280
I'm like, ooh, I can do that.
00:57:25.360 --> 00:57:27.360
Okay, you did that pretty good, right?
00:57:27.679 --> 00:57:33.840
So I always, when I think I can't do something, I tell myself, no, you're 10 times better than you know you are.
00:57:34.800 --> 00:57:44.159
And when you go through in real time solving the solutions, finding the solutions, then you realize you've proven that to yourself.
00:57:44.639 --> 00:57:45.679
So I love that.
00:57:45.760 --> 00:57:48.079
That and that is a surprise, right?
00:57:48.320 --> 00:57:50.960
Because you think you know everything about yourself, but you don't.
00:57:51.440 --> 00:58:07.679
You know, someone once told me um on one of my podcasts, I think it was Bianca, she said when she was living in her comfort zone, she said, when you live in your comfort zone, you really don't know who you are as a person, right?
00:58:08.000 --> 00:58:13.440
You don't know all the stuff you're capable of because you've stayed in this little room right here.
00:58:13.599 --> 00:58:24.480
So when you get out of the room, you give yourself space for all that talent, all that knowledge, all that energy and creativity to come out.
00:58:24.880 --> 00:58:29.039
So, yes, beautiful, beautiful.
00:58:29.920 --> 00:58:42.000
So, ladies, thank you so much for being part of this exhale session, for showing up fully, not just as professionals, but as women.
00:58:53.199 --> 00:59:06.480
And to the woman listening, I hope you take a moment to just breathe, to release the pressure, to have everything figured out, to release the expectation that you have to carry it all on your own.
00:59:06.559 --> 00:59:13.360
And to remember, you are allowed to build a life that feels as good as it looks.
00:59:13.760 --> 00:59:21.039
Thank you for being here, for listening, and for continuing to do the work of becoming.
00:59:21.519 --> 00:59:23.519
So I want to leave you with this.
00:59:23.840 --> 00:59:31.360
Build the business, but don't forget to build the life that allows you to enjoy it.
00:59:31.599 --> 00:59:39.920
And if you appreciate anything you're experiencing with us today, we ask you please be sure to do four powerful actions.
00:59:40.159 --> 00:59:49.599
Subscribe, comment, rate us five stars, and share the podcast with sisters in business you care about.
00:59:49.920 --> 00:59:56.960
And as always, I wish you the very best of joy, health, and wealth.
00:59:57.199 --> 00:59:59.760
Until next time, be well.