WEBVTT
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I palo santo'd the fuck outta this bitch.
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Good.
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So we're, we're solid.
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Welcome to Empaths Anonymous, a space for dreamers, healers, and feelers.
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Navigating the fine line between putting yourself first and holding space for others.
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If you struggle with balancing your needs while still supporting your tribe, then you're in the right place.
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Welcome to the support group.
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Hi.
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Welcome to or welcome back to Empath's Anonymous podcast.
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I'm Danie.
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And I'm Crystina.
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And today we're gonna get into it, but first, what's in your cup, sister?
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What's in my cup is a tangerine.
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LaCroix.
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LaCroix.
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You guys, what's the actual way to say that here?
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Amazing.
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What's the actual way to say that?
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I don't know how to actually say the brand.
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LaCroix.
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LaCroix.
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Laqua.
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Laqua.
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Laqua.
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Yeah.
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I don't know.
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Laroy.
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I always say Laroy even though I know that's wrong, but I don't care.
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I think that is the American way.
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The typical American way to say it.
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Ooh, that's fresh.
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The Croix.
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Yeah, so that's what's in my cup.
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I feel like this whole episode, I mean, you know, because you're clicking on it, that this is gonna be just kind of a shorter mm-hmm.
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The whole episode, the what's in your cup, honestly, a little check-in.
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Right.
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Um, so what's in your cup?
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And then I guess we'll get into Right.
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Feels That's fair enough.
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I have a coffee made at home.
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Because I'm good and I don't need to go out and spend$8 every day.
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Yeah.
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Even though most of the time I do.
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Um, it's a Trader Joe's K-Cup with a little Laird vanilla and a dash of hazelnut.
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'cause I'm weaning myself off of the hydrogenated oils.
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Hmm.
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And still not working.
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What's not working?
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Me not being off of the hydrogenated oils.
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Oh.
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It's like I've been all the Trader Joe's meals.
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Girl.
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I know.
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I just saw TikTok the other day saying that like Trader Joe's isn't as healthy as they like market themselves to being like, oh, and I knew that.
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Yeah.
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And I knew that.
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We know that maybe some of the more fresh stuff, you know, why and in like the produce section aren't as bad, but like anything frozen, my guy always, I mean you're really, you're really having to look through those things.
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We just wanted to get on the couch and in the spirit of always being transparent about the journey that was part of the deal here let you guys in on how we're like.
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Actually doing and actually feeling because while we love all of the interviews that we do and the chance to talk about mental health and what's happening to the collective and our communities you just gotta be about it.
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Mm-hmm.
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Uh, when you set out on a mission or when renew, answer the call from the universe that like, this is what my purpose is supposed to be.
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And even just the purpose for the podcast, you have to then walk the way that you talk.
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Mm-hmm.
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And so who am I to sit on here with some of the most amazing therapists and dating experts and artists and creatives and people who are out there doing the work if I am struggling internally and mentally.
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Um, and so we just had to have, as we always do, some real ass conversations.
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Plural.
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'cause I think that we talked about this more than once.
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Oh, about at least once a week.
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Yeah.
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About just settling down because I've been very transparent always about my mental health journey and getting diagnosed with OCD and it's getting to the point where I'm really approaching my breaking point and it's getting pretty bad about this time a year ago.
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Yeah, when you guys are listening to this, it'll be pretty much a year.
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Um, I got laid off from my job and so that is kind of what triggered a lot of my OCD symptoms.
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And it got really bad then, and now I'm kind of approaching it there again.
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And so it's getting to a point where I can't ignore because it's.
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You know, weekly, if not daily or every other day, you know, spirals.
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And I'm waking up at three, four in the morning'cause I have anxiety and I can't go back to sleep.
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Um, and my brain is just lying to me and it's causing me to.
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Not really enjoy my life.
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Hmm.
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And that's not cool.
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No.
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To put it lightly and that's not a good time.
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It's not.
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No.
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Yeah.
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To make light of something that's actually very serious and can become debilitating.
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Right.
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You never, we never want like.
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Something like our podcast, which is supposed to be a creative outlet and something that's supposed to be fun.
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The work behind it all, at the end of the day, as we always say it is work.
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We never want that portion of it and that part of it to become like dreadful or something that we are not looking forward to doing.
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And so for protection of our mind, body, soul, this is the best choice for us.
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Right now.
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And I think that deciding on this was really hard because very, if you've been listening to us, um, since the beginning or even here recently, I think you can kind of pick up what we're putting down that like we care very deeply and and are perfectionist in our own right.
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And so we, we've a po a podcast about being an empath and we care deeply like, what the fuck?
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Why would you do that?
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Right?
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And so it's like our, we're emotionally involved and invest.
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Did, of course we are.
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Um, and so taking a break from something that you do love, even though it is hard it was a difficult choice.
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And I think we went back and forth with it for a long time until we finally just realized like, if we keep having this same conversation, I think we already know what the answer is.
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We just can't quite say it.
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And so this being an extended hiatus, probably the longest break we've taken thus far?
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I mean, we really only took a break for Christmas, right?
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We haven't really ever taken a break.
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I mean, it's only been a year, but you know what I mean?
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Yeah.
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Like we, uh, is two weeks really a break?
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I mean, I guess in our mind, in our mind, it was that, um, because when you're go, when you're going nonstop, yeah, two weeks can feel like somewhat of a break.
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But it wasn't a break enough for us to, actually rest and actually take time for ourselves and our individual endeavors and be able to kind of just process all the stuff that we've been talking about in this podcast that has happened to us in our lives individually and together in like the last two years.
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Right.
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Um, so I think that.
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If there was a time to do it, it has to be now.
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Or we are going to approach burnout as we've talked about before on this podcast.
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And like Crystina said, if we're not about it, everyone's gonna be able to tell.
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'cause we're not gonna be here on the green velvet couch as fully present or fully ourselves.
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And so that's not ever how we want to come across.
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Right.
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And I don't ever want.
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To come off as complaining.
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I feel like sometimes we get on here and we're like, the podcast, the podcast, the podcast, whatever.
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I love this probably more than anything right now.
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Like, not like my friends and family and like things like that, but just as far as the things that I'm working on, mm-hmm.
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This is number one for me.
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It's not that the podcast itself is taxing because I do enjoy it.
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It's the mental and emotional load that is becoming hard, especially when you are trying to protect your friendship.
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Mm-hmm.
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And you are trying to move about things in a way that is considerate of both people who are.
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Doing different things and on different trajectories.
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Mm-hmm.
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We're each gonna need different things and it's gonna look different for each of us, so mm-hmm.
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If that's always our priority.
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In general with anything that you know may be coming up in your life.
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If your priority in life is your relationships and making sure that your community and your people are good, it's always going to come with compromise and it's always going to come with some kind of, sacrifice, I guess is the best way to put it, is like you can't always put yourself first and what you want because everybody needs something a little bit different and everybody's life has something different going on.
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So I think that's my.
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Advice to anybody listening is that if you do have something in your life that is coming, you know, I wouldn't say coming in between, but something that you're working on with somebody, whether it's a friend, a partner, a loved one, whatever you're enjoying together.
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It's a business, it's a creative hobby, it's a project of any sort.
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There just really has to be so much love for each other and.
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Boundaries and a foundation that you can go off of.
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Mm-hmm.
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Um, so that when things come up or when things get tiring or when you know you're trying to motivate each other or keep encouraging each other, it's like you can go back to the foundation you established in the beginning and say.
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This is why we're doing things.
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This is how we're gonna treat each other.
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This is how we're gonna approach the work, right?
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Mm-hmm.
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I'm gonna put these in quotes'cause it's like, yes, the, like any kind of project is going to be work, but if it's something you love, it doesn't feel like work.
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Correct.
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And I think the biggest challenge moving from a individualistic way of living life into a more communal way of living is an adjustment that I think we don't really talk about as much.
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Like as a society, we're pushed to just only live our own individual lives.
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But when life and the universe pushes you into living as a community, you are like, okay.
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I don't really have that as an option anymore.
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Right.
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And so now it's nothing but considering the people around me and honestly, why wouldn't I wanna live that way?
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It's an ancestral way of living.
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It's like deeply rooted within us.
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Like these are, this is literally how humans were supposed to like survive is relying on one another.
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And so I think being able to move toward a more collective mindset.
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Hmm.
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Is not easy when you've lived your whole life the opposite way.
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And so yeah, you have to learn that like sacrifice and compromise are some of the things that are just like required.
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Right.
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Um, and because we're all doing it for each other, it shouldn't be this like taboo thing to talk about or have a conversation about.
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Yeah.
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And so, I think just being able to lean into that a little bit more and realize like, this is how we're meant to live and like rely on one another will help us come back refreshed and have like a reframing of how we want things to move forward in the future.
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Right.
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And it's always about being better so that we can feel better.
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Yeah.
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And become better.
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I'll also, not that I'm gonna counter it.
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Because two things can be true at once.
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Mm-hmm.
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It's like, yes, you have to consider others, but I mean, whether you're listening as an empath or a highly sensitive person, a deep feeler in general, we also have to put ourselves first.
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It's this very delicate balance and juggle.
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And so I was, you know, recently just brought back to our second guest ever, which was Nareen who.
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Shout out nre.
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We still keep in contact with her.
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She's the best.
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She's doing amazing work.
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at@nisrinemaktabi on Instagram, go follow her.
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She's starting to do like community circles, um, and a lot of awareness for what's happening in Gaza.
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So go follow her and see everything she has going on.
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But I found myself doing like the empath thing, as she said in our podcast, again, of, it's almost this like act of.
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You, you're telling yourself it's selflessness, but it's also like putting yourself on the back burner.
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Mm-hmm.
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And so it's a constant juggle of like, I do wanna consider the other people in my life, but if I'm always putting myself on the back burner, then I'm doing the thing that's gonna put me back in the empath loop.
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Mm-hmm.
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So how do I honor both?
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Right.
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I think is the, the biggest struggle.
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And for me, what it looked like was.
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Allowing myself to know that I can come to the table and say, this is how I am feeling.
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That's valid.
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And this is my opinion or my view on things.
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And the other person is also allowed to say, well, this is my, these are my feelings and this is my view on things.
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And so accepting the fact that like they can have their truth, I can have my truth and it's totally fine, and it doesn't mean that they don't value me.
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I think that that's the best place that you can get to as an empath is knowing that just because you're stating how you feel, and it doesn't change the situation, it doesn't mean that the other person thinks that you're feelings or your point of view is invalid, right?
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When all the feelings get shared and you have one big pot.
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Of mixed emotions of deep feeling.
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Fucking St.
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Stew, St yeah.
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Feeling stew.
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Um, whereas Rachel Ray called it a stoop.
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Bless her heart.
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I don't know what's going on with her.
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Where are you, Rachel?
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A lot of people are concerned for like her health'cause she's like really bloated and she seems to be like a little bit on the alcoholism.
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Oh yeah.
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As an aside, when you have the big pot of feelings, all those things are still true for each and every individual.
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And so those things can get mixed together a lot and get like a little bit muddy and feel like no one's hearing me or seeing me.
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Or understanding me.
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But I think like you're saying, coming to terms with the fact that like, I may not understand your lived experience because I have my own.
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You have your own.
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I think that setting the boundaries as an empath to being like, well, there's only so much that I can take on that's yours and that you can take on.
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That's mine, right?
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Yeah.
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So I think that those are the boundaries that we are trying to set.
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And then.
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Being in this capacity where it's like, you know, always together all the time and trying to figure this out and figure that out and figure this out, like it, that's the part that does become mentally taxing.
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And then before you know it, like we're running into these walls where we don't have time for ourselves.
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And that puts us right back in the loop, right?
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Mm-hmm.
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It's like, okay, well I could take this for you and I could take that for you and well, I'll take that for you and we could take this for each other.
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And it's a lot of like switch off and, and trade off.
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At the end of the day, like if we don't.
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Actually carve out time, like literally in the calendar and say, this day for this many hours is when I'm gonna do this for myself.
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We'll always choose the thing that we're both passionate about, which is the podcast because we always want it to be better and we're interested in growth and we want it to be.
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A community where everyone can come and feel seen and heard.
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But when we're not showing up as our best selves because we're being, you know, I guess rung dry in a way, then yeah, we're not gonna be that support system that we sought out to be.
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And so I think all this to say as we set out to do in the beginning, it's always gonna be real time growth and learning and healing like you are.
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Meeting us exactly where we're at every single time that we are on this couch.
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Like we didn't do all the work and then become like this enlightened or heightened version or higher self.
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Like all of this is real time.
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Like you're seeing us heal in real time.
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You're seeing us grow and learn and struggle in real time.
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And that was intentional.
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Yes, it was.
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That was on purpose.
00:16:16.844 --> 00:16:19.249
So they feel like, why are they explaining to us why they take a break?
00:16:19.249 --> 00:16:20.328
Just take a break, bitch.
00:16:20.658 --> 00:16:22.999
It's like, we're doing this because that was the purpose.
00:16:23.359 --> 00:16:23.839
Yeah.
00:16:24.349 --> 00:16:29.149
We're doing this because that's'cause we saw in the beginning that not everybody was giving the behind the scenes.
00:16:29.149 --> 00:16:30.288
It's like, you know, you see.
00:16:30.288 --> 00:16:30.379
Right.
00:16:31.129 --> 00:16:35.599
I don't know why she always comes to my mind, but like you see like a Mel Robbins or like a Brene Brown.
00:16:35.599 --> 00:16:35.658
Yeah.
00:16:35.808 --> 00:16:36.139
Right.
00:16:36.139 --> 00:16:36.349
Yeah.
00:16:36.379 --> 00:16:37.908
And you see them for who they are now.
00:16:37.908 --> 00:16:37.999
Right.
00:16:38.058 --> 00:16:41.028
I don't know who the fuck Brene Brown was when she was like 30.
00:16:41.058 --> 00:16:41.538
Yeah.
00:16:41.629 --> 00:16:41.869
Exactly.
00:16:42.649 --> 00:16:43.578
And doing the work.
00:16:43.609 --> 00:16:43.818
Yeah.
00:16:43.818 --> 00:16:44.448
And healing.
00:16:44.568 --> 00:16:46.339
They had, I only see the Brene Brown now.
00:16:46.399 --> 00:16:46.729
Yeah.
00:16:46.788 --> 00:16:50.149
They've had opportunities and I'm not saying I'm gonna be Brene Brown, but you know what I'm saying.
00:16:50.208 --> 00:16:52.428
We could be the, we could be the Brown Brene Browns.
00:16:52.788 --> 00:16:54.288
And she's had, you know.
00:16:54.828 --> 00:17:00.019
Years and, and experience and with, with experience and years comes wisdom.
00:17:00.019 --> 00:17:03.558
And so we're meeting her like with all this wisdom that she has, right?
00:17:03.619 --> 00:17:06.409
And with us we're just like, you're gonna meet me where the fuck I am.
00:17:06.409 --> 00:17:16.519
And so if it feels like we're overexplaining this because we want us, we want, take me how you motherfucking take me, literally, it's because we want to talk about the hard shit.
00:17:16.894 --> 00:17:17.314
Yeah.
00:17:17.314 --> 00:17:22.173
You know, we want to sit here and say like, not everything is fucking peaches and rainbows bitch.
00:17:22.173 --> 00:17:24.493
Like, and we're gonna show you why it's not.
00:17:24.493 --> 00:17:31.000
And so because we're showing you all this in real time, like each other, like us, we have to be okay with Right.
00:17:31.030 --> 00:17:34.780
The change and, and the flow and the redirection.
00:17:34.871 --> 00:17:36.550
'cause it's constant, right?
00:17:36.550 --> 00:17:43.300
And so I think we're learning how to let go of the rigidity of it all and actually.
00:17:43.806 --> 00:17:47.405
Really show up as our true and real self.
00:17:47.405 --> 00:17:53.105
So it's like, right, if I'm telling you what's in my cup, I actually have to be very honest and say like, I'm fucking tired.
00:17:53.346 --> 00:17:53.465
Yeah.
00:17:53.465 --> 00:17:56.766
Crystina's tired we're my brain.
00:17:56.766 --> 00:18:01.195
I was explaining to Danie the way, the best way that I can put it to people.
00:18:01.395 --> 00:18:08.056
When my OCD is flaring up is it feels like, you know when you go to the beach and you get in the waves, you're like, I can fucking handle it.
00:18:08.205 --> 00:18:17.925
And then the waves pick up and they're bigger than you anticipated and like it goes over you and then you get fucking rolled in the wave and then you're just like, it takes a couple wave cycles for you to like get back to the surface.
00:18:17.986 --> 00:18:18.915
That's how it feels.
00:18:18.915 --> 00:18:24.195
But in my brain, you know, that's the best way I can explain it to an outside person.
00:18:24.195 --> 00:18:30.016
Like my thoughts are getting fucking rolled in the waves and so yeah, I'm tired.
00:18:30.115 --> 00:18:32.125
I don't ever wanna say this to complain.
00:18:32.125 --> 00:18:37.705
I know that everybody has their own struggles, but I'm like, I don't really have much juice left.
00:18:37.796 --> 00:18:39.625
You know, like Lizzo says, like, I got the juice.
00:18:39.625 --> 00:18:40.675
I don't got the juice.
00:18:40.675 --> 00:18:43.346
I probably have like two sips of juice left.
00:18:44.455 --> 00:18:50.246
It's really the, the best choice that you can make for yourself are often the hardest ones.
00:18:50.246 --> 00:18:50.726
Hmm.
00:18:51.324 --> 00:19:00.084
Knowing that you're approaching this tipping point, like, you know, the, the teapot that's about to pour over and not in a good way'cause the boiling fucking hot water.
00:19:00.503 --> 00:19:11.144
And just understanding like, okay, I am getting to this point and I know that if I continue at the rate that I'm going, then something is gonna fall apart.
00:19:11.294 --> 00:19:13.818
And right now neither of us can afford.
00:19:14.548 --> 00:19:16.348
For that to be ourselves.
00:19:16.919 --> 00:19:17.459
Exactly.
00:19:17.459 --> 00:19:25.679
We can't, neither of us can afford to fall apart and for whatever different reasons they are, it just is not an option.
00:19:25.979 --> 00:19:26.219
Yeah.
00:19:26.278 --> 00:19:32.459
And so I think because going back to the communal part, we have more people than just us to consider.
00:19:32.788 --> 00:19:33.148
Yeah.
00:19:33.605 --> 00:19:35.586
At the end of the day, it's like.
00:19:35.945 --> 00:19:36.726
No matter what.
00:19:36.726 --> 00:19:36.965
Right?
00:19:37.026 --> 00:19:42.256
You have to take care of you because other people are relying on you.
00:19:42.286 --> 00:19:42.375
Right?
00:19:42.375 --> 00:19:49.846
And even if you're relying on yourself, like there's sometimes like parts of yourself that just like, oh, I could really rely on like this version of myself right now.
00:19:49.846 --> 00:20:00.885
Or, oh, I could really rely on like this part of myself right now, but if all the parts are being depleted, there's nothing to pull from really, and there's nothing to rely on.
00:20:00.885 --> 00:20:01.455
Yeah.
00:20:01.605 --> 00:20:03.855
We're still gonna be active.
00:20:04.576 --> 00:20:05.441
I wanna tie this up like Yeah.
00:20:05.441 --> 00:20:06.435
This doesn't mean we're going away.
00:20:06.556 --> 00:20:12.385
We're gonna release some replays for you guys of some of our favorite episodes of some of your favorite episodes that did the best.
00:20:12.655 --> 00:20:19.625
We're gonna show you some other podcasts that we love that are gonna be supported to you in your, you know, healing journey.
00:20:19.685 --> 00:20:19.865
Mm-hmm.
00:20:20.105 --> 00:20:21.576
So we're just to be posting things.
00:20:21.576 --> 00:20:28.536
It's just not gonna be like in real time, like us sitting down on the couch every week or so, like we normally are doing.
00:20:28.746 --> 00:20:28.986
Mm-hmm.
00:20:29.645 --> 00:20:30.935
So that's how it's gonna look different.
00:20:31.205 --> 00:20:31.566
Yeah.
00:20:31.895 --> 00:20:42.405
We're gonna have lots of conversations about the comeback after the hiatus because we want to show up as our full and honest and truthful selves.
00:20:42.715 --> 00:20:50.971
But in the meantime, while you are listening to those replays and you are being introduced to new people and new podcasts we are, uh.
00:20:50.971 --> 00:20:53.641
Very, very super active on TikTok.
00:20:53.881 --> 00:20:55.411
We're having a bunch of fun over there.
00:20:55.651 --> 00:20:55.830
Yeah.
00:20:55.830 --> 00:21:04.260
So if you guys wanna kind of keep up with our journey, we have lots of plans to kind of build up our community.
00:21:04.820 --> 00:21:15.681
On social media so that people get a better idea of like, who we are, our personalities, and basically give people a reason to want to listen to us.
00:21:16.161 --> 00:21:16.611
Right.
00:21:16.701 --> 00:21:25.010
Um, because as of right now, right, like we're still, in this lane of like trying to seek our community or having our community find us.
00:21:25.010 --> 00:21:25.820
We're very indie.
00:21:26.316 --> 00:21:27.260
We are, we're little indie.
00:21:27.411 --> 00:21:28.550
We're little indie babies.
00:21:28.550 --> 00:21:29.391
You know, we are.
00:21:29.421 --> 00:21:35.181
I, again, not trying to complain about how hard things are because it's like I would still choose this again and again.
00:21:35.780 --> 00:21:50.685
It's a peek behind the curtain of being like a small creative or like a, like a indie content creator of any form, is that when you don't already have the platform, it is a lot harder for you.
00:21:51.605 --> 00:21:52.806
And that's just the facts.
00:21:53.105 --> 00:21:56.016
And we started the podcast because we had some shit to say.
00:21:56.105 --> 00:21:56.195
Mm-hmm.
00:21:56.435 --> 00:21:59.915
And I think that for the last year, it's been what we needed mm-hmm.
00:22:00.155 --> 00:22:07.205
To get those things out, to learn to dive deeper, um, with each other, with ourselves, with our guests, with you guys.
00:22:07.266 --> 00:22:07.355
Mm-hmm.
00:22:07.605 --> 00:22:14.449
But yeah, we kind of realized like we have to spend time on building up.
00:22:14.753 --> 00:22:15.413
Community.
00:22:15.713 --> 00:22:16.074
Right.
00:22:16.134 --> 00:22:24.743
Attracting more feelers, connecting with you guys, showing you more of us and our life, which taking a break from the podcast is going to give us some more space.
00:22:24.773 --> 00:22:24.923
Mm-hmm.
00:22:25.163 --> 00:22:30.864
To do that because you wanna know what my life looks like right now, sitting in that damn fucking office chair right over there.
00:22:30.878 --> 00:22:36.068
For like, pretty much every day for like eight hours a day, or in my bed also working.
00:22:36.159 --> 00:22:37.778
So that's what my life looks like.
00:22:37.778 --> 00:22:40.989
So I can't show you my life'cause it's, I'm not doing anything besides working.
00:22:41.019 --> 00:22:41.378
Yeah.
00:22:41.378 --> 00:22:53.019
And it's, that's not cool because it, there's no matter what, there's all, like I said earlier, there's always gonna be something to work on because that's just how, it's just the nature of being an entrepreneur and she's a double entrepreneur, you know?
00:22:53.679 --> 00:23:00.038
And on top of like all of that, I'm balancing and like trying to be a, a good mom, you know.
00:23:00.909 --> 00:23:05.259
How, how and going to school and we have to make money, right?
00:23:05.259 --> 00:23:08.828
It's like there, there's nothing, there's nothing feasible.
00:23:09.983 --> 00:23:13.463
That I can take a break from other than the pod.
00:23:13.463 --> 00:23:15.443
And I think it's true for the both of us.
00:23:15.594 --> 00:23:19.374
And it's hard because it is our creative outlet and it is something we love doing.
00:23:19.374 --> 00:23:20.243
We love talking to people.
00:23:20.243 --> 00:23:23.693
We love amplifying black and brown voices and we're gonna continue to do that.
00:23:23.723 --> 00:23:24.173
Yes.
00:23:24.233 --> 00:23:27.203
but it's like there's just no space for us.
00:23:27.203 --> 00:23:29.304
And so we are also black and brown voices.
00:23:29.394 --> 00:23:32.423
So that's like, girl, you've gotta sit down like.
00:23:32.788 --> 00:23:34.259
Yeah, you've gotta sit down.
00:23:34.259 --> 00:23:37.469
You have to be able to have deeper conversations with yourself.
00:23:37.469 --> 00:23:43.348
Yeah, especially me who like shows my emotions and my feelings in like very different ways.
00:23:43.528 --> 00:23:47.548
I'm an internal processor, I don't always outwardly express.
00:23:47.919 --> 00:23:51.923
And so I know a lot of that is just suppression and so.
00:23:52.678 --> 00:23:58.347
If I keep allowing myself to be that way and suppressing emotions, I will also implode.
00:23:58.647 --> 00:24:02.667
So there are lots of reasons for why this is necessary.
00:24:03.008 --> 00:24:05.438
You can still find us online.
00:24:05.498 --> 00:24:15.647
We're gonna be active and we are going to be really making an effort to talk to everybody and engage in sincerity.
00:24:15.708 --> 00:24:18.018
So that's that.
00:24:19.472 --> 00:24:20.073
That's all I have to say.
00:24:20.532 --> 00:24:22.873
Yeah, just to close it all out.
00:24:23.278 --> 00:24:25.018
We do love you guys.
00:24:25.018 --> 00:24:31.198
We see the people that have been writing for us and that are listening and that are sharing our episodes and are engaging with us.
00:24:31.198 --> 00:24:35.218
I don't want to make you guys feel like we don't see it and appreciate it, so.
00:24:35.577 --> 00:24:48.789
I wanna put out there, we do love and care about you, and just a reminder to take care of yourself first, because kind of like in the episode we talked to Soko in is there's so much going on in the world.
00:24:48.849 --> 00:24:48.940
Mm-hmm.
00:24:49.180 --> 00:24:52.420
That if you don't take care of yourself, you have no business.
00:24:52.420 --> 00:24:52.509
Mm-hmm.
00:24:53.621 --> 00:24:54.881
What is she in the streets?
00:24:54.911 --> 00:24:55.570
What did she say?
00:24:55.675 --> 00:24:57.086
Like, sit the fuck down or something like that.
00:24:57.086 --> 00:24:57.125
Sit the fuck down.
00:24:57.310 --> 00:24:57.611
Yeah.
00:24:57.611 --> 00:24:59.171
She literally said, sit down girl.
00:24:59.201 --> 00:24:59.471
Right.
00:24:59.471 --> 00:25:01.871
And it's like you can't, you have to advocate for yourself.
00:25:01.901 --> 00:25:07.240
'cause you can't always just be an advocate for other people, especially when it's not coming from a place of having a full cup.
00:25:07.421 --> 00:25:07.570
Mm.
00:25:07.601 --> 00:25:10.721
So with that, let us pray.
00:25:11.729 --> 00:25:19.811
Spirit grant me, the serenity to listen to my intuition, the courage to make new choices even when they feel foreign.
00:25:20.487 --> 00:25:25.166
And as always, the wisdom to not read a bitch when they try me.
00:25:25.737 --> 00:25:26.396
Amen.
00:25:26.727 --> 00:25:29.876
And so it is.
00:25:29.876 --> 00:25:29.906
So it is.
00:25:30.416 --> 00:25:30.626
Bye.
00:25:34.922 --> 00:25:37.471
Thanks for tuning in to this week's EA meeting.
00:25:37.592 --> 00:25:43.501
If you liked this episode, please share it with a friend and leave a five star rating and review on Apple or Spotify.
00:25:43.531 --> 00:25:44.612
We'd love to hear from you.
00:25:44.942 --> 00:25:49.082
You can follow us on Instagram and TikTok at empaths and on Pod.
00:25:49.622 --> 00:25:58.142
Don't forget to follow us wherever you listen to podcasts or subscribe to our YouTube channel and turn on the notification bell so you're the first to know when we release a new episode.
00:25:58.471 --> 00:26:00.632
We'll meet you back here on the green velvet couch.
00:26:00.632 --> 00:26:00.811
Next.
00:26:00.832 --> 00:26:01.521
Time.
00:26:01.551 --> 00:26:02.872
Bye feelers.
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.279
I palo santo'd the fuck outta this bitch.
00:00:02.700 --> 00:00:02.790
Good.
00:00:02.790 --> 00:00:03.899
So we're, we're solid.
00:00:05.192 --> 00:00:10.801
Welcome to Empaths Anonymous, a space for dreamers, healers, and feelers.
00:00:10.862 --> 00:00:15.721
Navigating the fine line between putting yourself first and holding space for others.
00:00:15.961 --> 00:00:21.181
If you struggle with balancing your needs while still supporting your tribe, then you're in the right place.
00:00:21.422 --> 00:00:23.102
Welcome to the support group.
00:00:25.964 --> 00:00:26.714
Hi.
00:00:26.745 --> 00:00:30.315
Welcome to or welcome back to Empath's Anonymous podcast.
00:00:30.315 --> 00:00:30.894
I'm Danie.
00:00:31.065 --> 00:00:32.064
And I'm Crystina.
00:00:32.475 --> 00:00:37.170
And today we're gonna get into it, but first, what's in your cup, sister?
00:00:38.475 --> 00:00:41.085
What's in my cup is a tangerine.
00:00:41.085 --> 00:00:41.475
LaCroix.
00:00:42.164 --> 00:00:42.795
LaCroix.
00:00:43.335 --> 00:00:45.554
You guys, what's the actual way to say that here?
00:00:48.645 --> 00:00:49.155
Amazing.
00:00:49.604 --> 00:00:51.134
What's the actual way to say that?
00:00:51.225 --> 00:00:53.024
I don't know how to actually say the brand.
00:00:53.054 --> 00:00:53.414
LaCroix.
00:00:53.414 --> 00:00:53.625
LaCroix.
00:00:54.884 --> 00:00:55.395
Laqua.
00:00:55.420 --> 00:00:55.770
Laqua.
00:00:56.060 --> 00:00:56.409
Laqua.
00:00:57.284 --> 00:00:57.524
Yeah.
00:00:57.524 --> 00:00:57.914
I don't know.
00:00:57.945 --> 00:00:58.634
Laroy.
00:00:58.725 --> 00:01:01.424
I always say Laroy even though I know that's wrong, but I don't care.
00:01:01.454 --> 00:01:02.744
I think that is the American way.
00:01:03.119 --> 00:01:05.219
The typical American way to say it.
00:01:05.819 --> 00:01:06.569
Ooh, that's fresh.
00:01:06.569 --> 00:01:06.959
The Croix.
00:01:07.920 --> 00:01:09.390
Yeah, so that's what's in my cup.
00:01:09.390 --> 00:01:15.599
I feel like this whole episode, I mean, you know, because you're clicking on it, that this is gonna be just kind of a shorter mm-hmm.
00:01:16.079 --> 00:01:18.659
The whole episode, the what's in your cup, honestly, a little check-in.
00:01:18.840 --> 00:01:19.109
Right.
00:01:19.140 --> 00:01:20.534
Um, so what's in your cup?
00:01:20.534 --> 00:01:22.500
And then I guess we'll get into Right.
00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:23.849
Feels That's fair enough.
00:01:23.879 --> 00:01:25.170
I have a coffee made at home.
00:01:26.250 --> 00:01:30.180
Because I'm good and I don't need to go out and spend$8 every day.
00:01:30.510 --> 00:01:30.569
Yeah.
00:01:30.569 --> 00:01:32.609
Even though most of the time I do.
00:01:33.120 --> 00:01:39.329
Um, it's a Trader Joe's K-Cup with a little Laird vanilla and a dash of hazelnut.
00:01:39.329 --> 00:01:42.599
'cause I'm weaning myself off of the hydrogenated oils.
00:01:42.810 --> 00:01:43.109
Hmm.
00:01:43.109 --> 00:01:45.359
And still not working.
00:01:47.099 --> 00:01:47.819
What's not working?
00:01:48.120 --> 00:01:50.579
Me not being off of the hydrogenated oils.
00:01:50.730 --> 00:01:51.209
Oh.
00:01:51.209 --> 00:01:53.730
It's like I've been all the Trader Joe's meals.
00:01:53.730 --> 00:01:54.209
Girl.
00:01:54.269 --> 00:01:54.930
I know.
00:01:55.829 --> 00:02:01.540
I just saw TikTok the other day saying that like Trader Joe's isn't as healthy as they like market themselves to being like, oh, and I knew that.
00:02:01.724 --> 00:02:02.015
Yeah.
00:02:02.114 --> 00:02:02.614
And I knew that.
00:02:02.614 --> 00:02:13.800
We know that maybe some of the more fresh stuff, you know, why and in like the produce section aren't as bad, but like anything frozen, my guy always, I mean you're really, you're really having to look through those things.
00:02:14.073 --> 00:02:25.842
We just wanted to get on the couch and in the spirit of always being transparent about the journey that was part of the deal here let you guys in on how we're like.
00:02:26.182 --> 00:02:40.502
Actually doing and actually feeling because while we love all of the interviews that we do and the chance to talk about mental health and what's happening to the collective and our communities you just gotta be about it.
00:02:40.983 --> 00:02:41.163
Mm-hmm.
00:02:41.673 --> 00:02:48.872
Uh, when you set out on a mission or when renew, answer the call from the universe that like, this is what my purpose is supposed to be.
00:02:49.323 --> 00:02:54.663
And even just the purpose for the podcast, you have to then walk the way that you talk.
00:02:54.663 --> 00:02:54.752
Mm-hmm.
00:02:54.992 --> 00:03:07.862
And so who am I to sit on here with some of the most amazing therapists and dating experts and artists and creatives and people who are out there doing the work if I am struggling internally and mentally.
00:03:08.432 --> 00:03:14.043
Um, and so we just had to have, as we always do, some real ass conversations.
00:03:14.348 --> 00:03:14.737
Plural.
00:03:14.737 --> 00:03:16.807
'cause I think that we talked about this more than once.
00:03:17.798 --> 00:03:19.147
Oh, about at least once a week.
00:03:19.358 --> 00:03:19.747
Yeah.
00:03:19.747 --> 00:03:38.108
About just settling down because I've been very transparent always about my mental health journey and getting diagnosed with OCD and it's getting to the point where I'm really approaching my breaking point and it's getting pretty bad about this time a year ago.
00:03:38.361 --> 00:03:40.521
Yeah, when you guys are listening to this, it'll be pretty much a year.
00:03:41.002 --> 00:03:48.231
Um, I got laid off from my job and so that is kind of what triggered a lot of my OCD symptoms.
00:03:48.771 --> 00:03:54.292
And it got really bad then, and now I'm kind of approaching it there again.
00:03:54.352 --> 00:03:58.602
And so it's getting to a point where I can't ignore because it's.
00:03:59.201 --> 00:04:04.872
You know, weekly, if not daily or every other day, you know, spirals.
00:04:04.872 --> 00:04:09.792
And I'm waking up at three, four in the morning'cause I have anxiety and I can't go back to sleep.
00:04:10.271 --> 00:04:14.681
Um, and my brain is just lying to me and it's causing me to.
00:04:15.437 --> 00:04:16.966
Not really enjoy my life.
00:04:17.086 --> 00:04:17.416
Hmm.
00:04:17.567 --> 00:04:18.497
And that's not cool.
00:04:19.367 --> 00:04:19.697
No.
00:04:19.697 --> 00:04:22.637
To put it lightly and that's not a good time.
00:04:23.447 --> 00:04:23.466
It's not.
00:04:23.466 --> 00:04:23.776
No.
00:04:23.776 --> 00:04:24.016
Yeah.
00:04:24.016 --> 00:04:28.906
To make light of something that's actually very serious and can become debilitating.
00:04:28.937 --> 00:04:29.237
Right.
00:04:29.237 --> 00:04:31.516
You never, we never want like.
00:04:32.177 --> 00:04:36.916
Something like our podcast, which is supposed to be a creative outlet and something that's supposed to be fun.
00:04:37.156 --> 00:04:40.637
The work behind it all, at the end of the day, as we always say it is work.
00:04:40.786 --> 00:04:47.807
We never want that portion of it and that part of it to become like dreadful or something that we are not looking forward to doing.
00:04:48.117 --> 00:04:55.076
And so for protection of our mind, body, soul, this is the best choice for us.
00:04:55.081 --> 00:04:56.192
Right now.
00:04:56.401 --> 00:05:12.723
And I think that deciding on this was really hard because very, if you've been listening to us, um, since the beginning or even here recently, I think you can kind of pick up what we're putting down that like we care very deeply and and are perfectionist in our own right.
00:05:12.843 --> 00:05:16.983
And so we, we've a po a podcast about being an empath and we care deeply like, what the fuck?
00:05:17.463 --> 00:05:18.182
Why would you do that?
00:05:18.752 --> 00:05:19.112
Right?
00:05:19.112 --> 00:05:22.983
And so it's like our, we're emotionally involved and invest.
00:05:22.983 --> 00:05:23.942
Did, of course we are.
00:05:24.302 --> 00:05:32.043
Um, and so taking a break from something that you do love, even though it is hard it was a difficult choice.
00:05:32.043 --> 00:05:42.273
And I think we went back and forth with it for a long time until we finally just realized like, if we keep having this same conversation, I think we already know what the answer is.
00:05:42.273 --> 00:05:43.983
We just can't quite say it.
00:05:44.413 --> 00:05:52.333
And so this being an extended hiatus, probably the longest break we've taken thus far?
00:05:52.483 --> 00:05:55.423
I mean, we really only took a break for Christmas, right?
00:05:55.783 --> 00:05:57.163
We haven't really ever taken a break.
00:05:57.163 --> 00:05:59.112
I mean, it's only been a year, but you know what I mean?
00:05:59.117 --> 00:05:59.127
Yeah.
00:05:59.127 --> 00:06:02.083
Like we, uh, is two weeks really a break?
00:06:03.208 --> 00:06:13.648
I mean, I guess in our mind, in our mind, it was that, um, because when you're go, when you're going nonstop, yeah, two weeks can feel like somewhat of a break.
00:06:13.858 --> 00:06:34.117
But it wasn't a break enough for us to, actually rest and actually take time for ourselves and our individual endeavors and be able to kind of just process all the stuff that we've been talking about in this podcast that has happened to us in our lives individually and together in like the last two years.
00:06:34.298 --> 00:06:34.687
Right.
00:06:34.718 --> 00:06:37.177
Um, so I think that.
00:06:39.952 --> 00:06:44.903
If there was a time to do it, it has to be now.
00:06:44.903 --> 00:06:49.702
Or we are going to approach burnout as we've talked about before on this podcast.
00:06:49.702 --> 00:06:54.112
And like Crystina said, if we're not about it, everyone's gonna be able to tell.
00:06:54.112 --> 00:07:00.262
'cause we're not gonna be here on the green velvet couch as fully present or fully ourselves.
00:07:00.382 --> 00:07:03.983
And so that's not ever how we want to come across.
00:07:04.612 --> 00:07:05.122
Right.
00:07:06.083 --> 00:07:07.192
And I don't ever want.
00:07:08.017 --> 00:07:09.757
To come off as complaining.
00:07:09.757 --> 00:07:13.117
I feel like sometimes we get on here and we're like, the podcast, the podcast, the podcast, whatever.
00:07:13.538 --> 00:07:17.468
I love this probably more than anything right now.
00:07:17.468 --> 00:07:23.168
Like, not like my friends and family and like things like that, but just as far as the things that I'm working on, mm-hmm.
00:07:23.408 --> 00:07:24.997
This is number one for me.
00:07:25.447 --> 00:07:30.098
It's not that the podcast itself is taxing because I do enjoy it.
00:07:30.398 --> 00:07:40.651
It's the mental and emotional load that is becoming hard, especially when you are trying to protect your friendship.
00:07:41.071 --> 00:07:41.190
Mm-hmm.
00:07:41.430 --> 00:07:48.120
And you are trying to move about things in a way that is considerate of both people who are.
00:07:48.795 --> 00:07:51.165
Doing different things and on different trajectories.
00:07:51.165 --> 00:07:51.255
Mm-hmm.
00:07:51.495 --> 00:07:54.886
We're each gonna need different things and it's gonna look different for each of us, so mm-hmm.
00:07:55.336 --> 00:07:57.375
If that's always our priority.
00:07:58.065 --> 00:08:01.036
In general with anything that you know may be coming up in your life.
00:08:01.065 --> 00:08:25.576
If your priority in life is your relationships and making sure that your community and your people are good, it's always going to come with compromise and it's always going to come with some kind of, sacrifice, I guess is the best way to put it, is like you can't always put yourself first and what you want because everybody needs something a little bit different and everybody's life has something different going on.
00:08:25.906 --> 00:08:27.240
So I think that's my.
00:08:28.170 --> 00:08:42.941
Advice to anybody listening is that if you do have something in your life that is coming, you know, I wouldn't say coming in between, but something that you're working on with somebody, whether it's a friend, a partner, a loved one, whatever you're enjoying together.
00:08:42.941 --> 00:08:47.350
It's a business, it's a creative hobby, it's a project of any sort.
00:08:47.831 --> 00:08:51.640
There just really has to be so much love for each other and.
00:08:53.485 --> 00:08:56.515
Boundaries and a foundation that you can go off of.
00:08:56.546 --> 00:08:56.875
Mm-hmm.
00:08:57.176 --> 00:09:08.546
Um, so that when things come up or when things get tiring or when you know you're trying to motivate each other or keep encouraging each other, it's like you can go back to the foundation you established in the beginning and say.
00:09:09.221 --> 00:09:10.961
This is why we're doing things.
00:09:11.110 --> 00:09:12.581
This is how we're gonna treat each other.
00:09:12.581 --> 00:09:14.816
This is how we're gonna approach the work, right?
00:09:14.816 --> 00:09:15.096
Mm-hmm.
00:09:15.176 --> 00:09:22.660
I'm gonna put these in quotes'cause it's like, yes, the, like any kind of project is going to be work, but if it's something you love, it doesn't feel like work.
00:09:23.268 --> 00:09:23.868
Correct.
00:09:23.927 --> 00:09:37.868
And I think the biggest challenge moving from a individualistic way of living life into a more communal way of living is an adjustment that I think we don't really talk about as much.
00:09:37.868 --> 00:09:42.518
Like as a society, we're pushed to just only live our own individual lives.
00:09:42.878 --> 00:09:48.638
But when life and the universe pushes you into living as a community, you are like, okay.
00:09:48.857 --> 00:09:51.378
I don't really have that as an option anymore.
00:09:51.378 --> 00:09:51.467
Right.
00:09:51.528 --> 00:09:57.467
And so now it's nothing but considering the people around me and honestly, why wouldn't I wanna live that way?
00:09:57.467 --> 00:09:59.028
It's an ancestral way of living.
00:09:59.028 --> 00:10:00.798
It's like deeply rooted within us.
00:10:00.798 --> 00:10:05.388
Like these are, this is literally how humans were supposed to like survive is relying on one another.
00:10:05.817 --> 00:10:10.115
And so I think being able to move toward a more collective mindset.
00:10:10.384 --> 00:10:10.534
Hmm.
00:10:11.605 --> 00:10:14.934
Is not easy when you've lived your whole life the opposite way.
00:10:15.274 --> 00:10:22.715
And so yeah, you have to learn that like sacrifice and compromise are some of the things that are just like required.
00:10:23.044 --> 00:10:23.465
Right.
00:10:23.465 --> 00:10:31.384
Um, and because we're all doing it for each other, it shouldn't be this like taboo thing to talk about or have a conversation about.
00:10:31.894 --> 00:10:32.254
Yeah.
00:10:32.254 --> 00:10:51.855
And so, I think just being able to lean into that a little bit more and realize like, this is how we're meant to live and like rely on one another will help us come back refreshed and have like a reframing of how we want things to move forward in the future.
00:10:51.855 --> 00:10:52.455
Right.
00:10:52.455 --> 00:10:56.774
And it's always about being better so that we can feel better.
00:10:57.014 --> 00:10:57.075
Yeah.
00:10:57.075 --> 00:10:58.394
And become better.
00:10:58.754 --> 00:11:00.559
I'll also, not that I'm gonna counter it.
00:11:01.184 --> 00:11:03.164
Because two things can be true at once.
00:11:03.254 --> 00:11:03.345
Mm-hmm.
00:11:03.674 --> 00:11:14.475
It's like, yes, you have to consider others, but I mean, whether you're listening as an empath or a highly sensitive person, a deep feeler in general, we also have to put ourselves first.
00:11:14.774 --> 00:11:18.014
It's this very delicate balance and juggle.
00:11:18.284 --> 00:11:24.524
And so I was, you know, recently just brought back to our second guest ever, which was Nareen who.
00:11:25.110 --> 00:11:26.039
Shout out nre.
00:11:26.039 --> 00:11:27.720
We still keep in contact with her.
00:11:27.720 --> 00:11:28.470
She's the best.
00:11:28.470 --> 00:11:30.330
She's doing amazing work.
00:11:30.509 --> 00:11:34.799
at@nisrinemaktabi on Instagram, go follow her.
00:11:34.919 --> 00:11:40.379
She's starting to do like community circles, um, and a lot of awareness for what's happening in Gaza.
00:11:40.379 --> 00:11:42.600
So go follow her and see everything she has going on.
00:11:42.990 --> 00:11:52.529
But I found myself doing like the empath thing, as she said in our podcast, again, of, it's almost this like act of.
00:11:53.865 --> 00:11:58.215
You, you're telling yourself it's selflessness, but it's also like putting yourself on the back burner.
00:11:58.485 --> 00:11:58.664
Mm-hmm.
00:11:58.909 --> 00:12:10.664
And so it's a constant juggle of like, I do wanna consider the other people in my life, but if I'm always putting myself on the back burner, then I'm doing the thing that's gonna put me back in the empath loop.
00:12:11.054 --> 00:12:11.294
Mm-hmm.
00:12:11.774 --> 00:12:13.365
So how do I honor both?
00:12:13.875 --> 00:12:14.085
Right.
00:12:14.085 --> 00:12:17.054
I think is the, the biggest struggle.
00:12:17.054 --> 00:12:20.317
And for me, what it looked like was.
00:12:20.812 --> 00:12:28.851
Allowing myself to know that I can come to the table and say, this is how I am feeling.
00:12:29.631 --> 00:12:30.741
That's valid.
00:12:30.802 --> 00:12:34.011
And this is my opinion or my view on things.
00:12:34.251 --> 00:12:41.182
And the other person is also allowed to say, well, this is my, these are my feelings and this is my view on things.
00:12:41.432 --> 00:12:52.172
And so accepting the fact that like they can have their truth, I can have my truth and it's totally fine, and it doesn't mean that they don't value me.
00:12:52.991 --> 00:13:14.951
I think that that's the best place that you can get to as an empath is knowing that just because you're stating how you feel, and it doesn't change the situation, it doesn't mean that the other person thinks that you're feelings or your point of view is invalid, right?
00:13:15.011 --> 00:13:19.152
When all the feelings get shared and you have one big pot.
00:13:20.111 --> 00:13:23.951
Of mixed emotions of deep feeling.
00:13:23.981 --> 00:13:24.506
Fucking St.
00:13:24.506 --> 00:13:25.586
Stew, St yeah.
00:13:26.741 --> 00:13:27.432
Feeling stew.
00:13:28.272 --> 00:13:30.341
Um, whereas Rachel Ray called it a stoop.
00:13:30.522 --> 00:13:31.032
Bless her heart.
00:13:31.032 --> 00:13:31.871
I don't know what's going on with her.
00:13:32.501 --> 00:13:33.282
Where are you, Rachel?
00:13:33.836 --> 00:13:40.376
A lot of people are concerned for like her health'cause she's like really bloated and she seems to be like a little bit on the alcoholism.
00:13:40.527 --> 00:13:41.307
Oh yeah.
00:13:41.787 --> 00:13:50.336
As an aside, when you have the big pot of feelings, all those things are still true for each and every individual.
00:13:50.456 --> 00:13:58.677
And so those things can get mixed together a lot and get like a little bit muddy and feel like no one's hearing me or seeing me.
00:13:59.032 --> 00:14:00.621
Or understanding me.
00:14:00.621 --> 00:14:10.221
But I think like you're saying, coming to terms with the fact that like, I may not understand your lived experience because I have my own.
00:14:10.461 --> 00:14:11.422
You have your own.
00:14:11.841 --> 00:14:21.442
I think that setting the boundaries as an empath to being like, well, there's only so much that I can take on that's yours and that you can take on.
00:14:21.442 --> 00:14:22.672
That's mine, right?
00:14:22.672 --> 00:14:22.761
Yeah.
00:14:23.001 --> 00:14:26.782
So I think that those are the boundaries that we are trying to set.
00:14:26.782 --> 00:14:27.231
And then.
00:14:27.787 --> 00:14:41.437
Being in this capacity where it's like, you know, always together all the time and trying to figure this out and figure that out and figure this out, like it, that's the part that does become mentally taxing.
00:14:41.736 --> 00:14:49.267
And then before you know it, like we're running into these walls where we don't have time for ourselves.
00:14:50.361 --> 00:14:52.581
And that puts us right back in the loop, right?
00:14:52.611 --> 00:14:52.731
Mm-hmm.
00:14:52.971 --> 00:14:58.282
It's like, okay, well I could take this for you and I could take that for you and well, I'll take that for you and we could take this for each other.
00:14:58.282 --> 00:15:01.101
And it's a lot of like switch off and, and trade off.
00:15:01.491 --> 00:15:03.111
At the end of the day, like if we don't.
00:15:04.371 --> 00:15:12.231
Actually carve out time, like literally in the calendar and say, this day for this many hours is when I'm gonna do this for myself.
00:15:12.501 --> 00:15:23.631
We'll always choose the thing that we're both passionate about, which is the podcast because we always want it to be better and we're interested in growth and we want it to be.
00:15:24.068 --> 00:15:27.639
A community where everyone can come and feel seen and heard.
00:15:27.908 --> 00:15:39.385
But when we're not showing up as our best selves because we're being, you know, I guess rung dry in a way, then yeah, we're not gonna be that support system that we sought out to be.
00:15:39.446 --> 00:15:49.428
And so I think all this to say as we set out to do in the beginning, it's always gonna be real time growth and learning and healing like you are.
00:15:50.196 --> 00:15:55.926
Meeting us exactly where we're at every single time that we are on this couch.
00:15:56.196 --> 00:16:05.346
Like we didn't do all the work and then become like this enlightened or heightened version or higher self.
00:16:05.346 --> 00:16:07.025
Like all of this is real time.
00:16:07.025 --> 00:16:09.275
Like you're seeing us heal in real time.
00:16:09.275 --> 00:16:14.105
You're seeing us grow and learn and struggle in real time.
00:16:14.509 --> 00:16:15.558
And that was intentional.
00:16:15.589 --> 00:16:16.399
Yes, it was.
00:16:16.399 --> 00:16:16.844
That was on purpose.
00:16:16.844 --> 00:16:19.249
So they feel like, why are they explaining to us why they take a break?
00:16:19.249 --> 00:16:20.328
Just take a break, bitch.
00:16:20.658 --> 00:16:22.999
It's like, we're doing this because that was the purpose.
00:16:23.359 --> 00:16:23.839
Yeah.
00:16:24.349 --> 00:16:29.149
We're doing this because that's'cause we saw in the beginning that not everybody was giving the behind the scenes.
00:16:29.149 --> 00:16:30.288
It's like, you know, you see.
00:16:30.288 --> 00:16:30.379
Right.
00:16:31.129 --> 00:16:35.599
I don't know why she always comes to my mind, but like you see like a Mel Robbins or like a Brene Brown.
00:16:35.599 --> 00:16:35.658
Yeah.
00:16:35.808 --> 00:16:36.139
Right.
00:16:36.139 --> 00:16:36.349
Yeah.
00:16:36.379 --> 00:16:37.908
And you see them for who they are now.
00:16:37.908 --> 00:16:37.999
Right.
00:16:38.058 --> 00:16:41.028
I don't know who the fuck Brene Brown was when she was like 30.
00:16:41.058 --> 00:16:41.538
Yeah.
00:16:41.629 --> 00:16:41.869
Exactly.
00:16:42.649 --> 00:16:43.578
And doing the work.
00:16:43.609 --> 00:16:43.818
Yeah.
00:16:43.818 --> 00:16:44.448
And healing.
00:16:44.568 --> 00:16:46.339
They had, I only see the Brene Brown now.
00:16:46.399 --> 00:16:46.729
Yeah.
00:16:46.788 --> 00:16:50.149
They've had opportunities and I'm not saying I'm gonna be Brene Brown, but you know what I'm saying.
00:16:50.208 --> 00:16:52.428
We could be the, we could be the Brown Brene Browns.
00:16:52.788 --> 00:16:54.288
And she's had, you know.
00:16:54.828 --> 00:17:00.019
Years and, and experience and with, with experience and years comes wisdom.
00:17:00.019 --> 00:17:03.558
And so we're meeting her like with all this wisdom that she has, right?
00:17:03.619 --> 00:17:06.409
And with us we're just like, you're gonna meet me where the fuck I am.
00:17:06.409 --> 00:17:16.519
And so if it feels like we're overexplaining this because we want us, we want, take me how you motherfucking take me, literally, it's because we want to talk about the hard shit.
00:17:16.894 --> 00:17:17.314
Yeah.
00:17:17.314 --> 00:17:22.173
You know, we want to sit here and say like, not everything is fucking peaches and rainbows bitch.
00:17:22.173 --> 00:17:24.493
Like, and we're gonna show you why it's not.
00:17:24.493 --> 00:17:31.000
And so because we're showing you all this in real time, like each other, like us, we have to be okay with Right.
00:17:31.030 --> 00:17:34.780
The change and, and the flow and the redirection.
00:17:34.871 --> 00:17:36.550
'cause it's constant, right?
00:17:36.550 --> 00:17:43.300
And so I think we're learning how to let go of the rigidity of it all and actually.
00:17:43.806 --> 00:17:47.405
Really show up as our true and real self.
00:17:47.405 --> 00:17:53.105
So it's like, right, if I'm telling you what's in my cup, I actually have to be very honest and say like, I'm fucking tired.
00:17:53.346 --> 00:17:53.465
Yeah.
00:17:53.465 --> 00:17:56.766
Crystina's tired we're my brain.
00:17:56.766 --> 00:18:01.195
I was explaining to Danie the way, the best way that I can put it to people.
00:18:01.395 --> 00:18:08.056
When my OCD is flaring up is it feels like, you know when you go to the beach and you get in the waves, you're like, I can fucking handle it.
00:18:08.205 --> 00:18:17.925
And then the waves pick up and they're bigger than you anticipated and like it goes over you and then you get fucking rolled in the wave and then you're just like, it takes a couple wave cycles for you to like get back to the surface.
00:18:17.986 --> 00:18:18.915
That's how it feels.
00:18:18.915 --> 00:18:24.195
But in my brain, you know, that's the best way I can explain it to an outside person.
00:18:24.195 --> 00:18:30.016
Like my thoughts are getting fucking rolled in the waves and so yeah, I'm tired.
00:18:30.115 --> 00:18:32.125
I don't ever wanna say this to complain.
00:18:32.125 --> 00:18:37.705
I know that everybody has their own struggles, but I'm like, I don't really have much juice left.
00:18:37.796 --> 00:18:39.625
You know, like Lizzo says, like, I got the juice.
00:18:39.625 --> 00:18:40.675
I don't got the juice.
00:18:40.675 --> 00:18:43.346
I probably have like two sips of juice left.
00:18:44.455 --> 00:18:50.246
It's really the, the best choice that you can make for yourself are often the hardest ones.
00:18:50.246 --> 00:18:50.726
Hmm.
00:18:51.324 --> 00:19:00.084
Knowing that you're approaching this tipping point, like, you know, the, the teapot that's about to pour over and not in a good way'cause the boiling fucking hot water.
00:19:00.503 --> 00:19:11.144
And just understanding like, okay, I am getting to this point and I know that if I continue at the rate that I'm going, then something is gonna fall apart.
00:19:11.294 --> 00:19:13.818
And right now neither of us can afford.
00:19:14.548 --> 00:19:16.348
For that to be ourselves.
00:19:16.919 --> 00:19:17.459
Exactly.
00:19:17.459 --> 00:19:25.679
We can't, neither of us can afford to fall apart and for whatever different reasons they are, it just is not an option.
00:19:25.979 --> 00:19:26.219
Yeah.
00:19:26.278 --> 00:19:32.459
And so I think because going back to the communal part, we have more people than just us to consider.
00:19:32.788 --> 00:19:33.148
Yeah.
00:19:33.605 --> 00:19:35.586
At the end of the day, it's like.
00:19:35.945 --> 00:19:36.726
No matter what.
00:19:36.726 --> 00:19:36.965
Right?
00:19:37.026 --> 00:19:42.256
You have to take care of you because other people are relying on you.
00:19:42.286 --> 00:19:42.375
Right?
00:19:42.375 --> 00:19:49.846
And even if you're relying on yourself, like there's sometimes like parts of yourself that just like, oh, I could really rely on like this version of myself right now.
00:19:49.846 --> 00:20:00.885
Or, oh, I could really rely on like this part of myself right now, but if all the parts are being depleted, there's nothing to pull from really, and there's nothing to rely on.
00:20:00.885 --> 00:20:01.455
Yeah.
00:20:01.605 --> 00:20:03.855
We're still gonna be active.
00:20:04.576 --> 00:20:05.441
I wanna tie this up like Yeah.
00:20:05.441 --> 00:20:06.435
This doesn't mean we're going away.
00:20:06.556 --> 00:20:12.385
We're gonna release some replays for you guys of some of our favorite episodes of some of your favorite episodes that did the best.
00:20:12.655 --> 00:20:19.625
We're gonna show you some other podcasts that we love that are gonna be supported to you in your, you know, healing journey.
00:20:19.685 --> 00:20:19.865
Mm-hmm.
00:20:20.105 --> 00:20:21.576
So we're just to be posting things.
00:20:21.576 --> 00:20:28.536
It's just not gonna be like in real time, like us sitting down on the couch every week or so, like we normally are doing.
00:20:28.746 --> 00:20:28.986
Mm-hmm.
00:20:29.645 --> 00:20:30.935
So that's how it's gonna look different.
00:20:31.205 --> 00:20:31.566
Yeah.
00:20:31.895 --> 00:20:42.405
We're gonna have lots of conversations about the comeback after the hiatus because we want to show up as our full and honest and truthful selves.
00:20:42.715 --> 00:20:50.971
But in the meantime, while you are listening to those replays and you are being introduced to new people and new podcasts we are, uh.
00:20:50.971 --> 00:20:53.641
Very, very super active on TikTok.
00:20:53.881 --> 00:20:55.411
We're having a bunch of fun over there.
00:20:55.651 --> 00:20:55.830
Yeah.
00:20:55.830 --> 00:21:04.260
So if you guys wanna kind of keep up with our journey, we have lots of plans to kind of build up our community.
00:21:04.820 --> 00:21:15.681
On social media so that people get a better idea of like, who we are, our personalities, and basically give people a reason to want to listen to us.
00:21:16.161 --> 00:21:16.611
Right.
00:21:16.701 --> 00:21:25.010
Um, because as of right now, right, like we're still, in this lane of like trying to seek our community or having our community find us.
00:21:25.010 --> 00:21:25.820
We're very indie.
00:21:26.316 --> 00:21:27.260
We are, we're little indie.
00:21:27.411 --> 00:21:28.550
We're little indie babies.
00:21:28.550 --> 00:21:29.391
You know, we are.
00:21:29.421 --> 00:21:35.181
I, again, not trying to complain about how hard things are because it's like I would still choose this again and again.
00:21:35.780 --> 00:21:50.685
It's a peek behind the curtain of being like a small creative or like a, like a indie content creator of any form, is that when you don't already have the platform, it is a lot harder for you.
00:21:51.605 --> 00:21:52.806
And that's just the facts.
00:21:53.105 --> 00:21:56.016
And we started the podcast because we had some shit to say.
00:21:56.105 --> 00:21:56.195
Mm-hmm.
00:21:56.435 --> 00:21:59.915
And I think that for the last year, it's been what we needed mm-hmm.
00:22:00.155 --> 00:22:07.205
To get those things out, to learn to dive deeper, um, with each other, with ourselves, with our guests, with you guys.
00:22:07.266 --> 00:22:07.355
Mm-hmm.
00:22:07.605 --> 00:22:14.449
But yeah, we kind of realized like we have to spend time on building up.
00:22:14.753 --> 00:22:15.413
Community.
00:22:15.713 --> 00:22:16.074
Right.
00:22:16.134 --> 00:22:24.743
Attracting more feelers, connecting with you guys, showing you more of us and our life, which taking a break from the podcast is going to give us some more space.
00:22:24.773 --> 00:22:24.923
Mm-hmm.
00:22:25.163 --> 00:22:30.864
To do that because you wanna know what my life looks like right now, sitting in that damn fucking office chair right over there.
00:22:30.878 --> 00:22:36.068
For like, pretty much every day for like eight hours a day, or in my bed also working.
00:22:36.159 --> 00:22:37.778
So that's what my life looks like.
00:22:37.778 --> 00:22:40.989
So I can't show you my life'cause it's, I'm not doing anything besides working.
00:22:41.019 --> 00:22:41.378
Yeah.
00:22:41.378 --> 00:22:53.019
And it's, that's not cool because it, there's no matter what, there's all, like I said earlier, there's always gonna be something to work on because that's just how, it's just the nature of being an entrepreneur and she's a double entrepreneur, you know?
00:22:53.679 --> 00:23:00.038
And on top of like all of that, I'm balancing and like trying to be a, a good mom, you know.
00:23:00.909 --> 00:23:05.259
How, how and going to school and we have to make money, right?
00:23:05.259 --> 00:23:08.828
It's like there, there's nothing, there's nothing feasible.
00:23:09.983 --> 00:23:13.463
That I can take a break from other than the pod.
00:23:13.463 --> 00:23:15.443
And I think it's true for the both of us.
00:23:15.594 --> 00:23:19.374
And it's hard because it is our creative outlet and it is something we love doing.
00:23:19.374 --> 00:23:20.243
We love talking to people.
00:23:20.243 --> 00:23:23.693
We love amplifying black and brown voices and we're gonna continue to do that.
00:23:23.723 --> 00:23:24.173
Yes.
00:23:24.233 --> 00:23:27.203
but it's like there's just no space for us.
00:23:27.203 --> 00:23:29.304
And so we are also black and brown voices.
00:23:29.394 --> 00:23:32.423
So that's like, girl, you've gotta sit down like.
00:23:32.788 --> 00:23:34.259
Yeah, you've gotta sit down.
00:23:34.259 --> 00:23:37.469
You have to be able to have deeper conversations with yourself.
00:23:37.469 --> 00:23:43.348
Yeah, especially me who like shows my emotions and my feelings in like very different ways.
00:23:43.528 --> 00:23:47.548
I'm an internal processor, I don't always outwardly express.
00:23:47.919 --> 00:23:51.923
And so I know a lot of that is just suppression and so.
00:23:52.678 --> 00:23:58.347
If I keep allowing myself to be that way and suppressing emotions, I will also implode.
00:23:58.647 --> 00:24:02.667
So there are lots of reasons for why this is necessary.
00:24:03.008 --> 00:24:05.438
You can still find us online.
00:24:05.498 --> 00:24:15.647
We're gonna be active and we are going to be really making an effort to talk to everybody and engage in sincerity.
00:24:15.708 --> 00:24:18.018
So that's that.
00:24:19.472 --> 00:24:20.073
That's all I have to say.
00:24:20.532 --> 00:24:22.873
Yeah, just to close it all out.
00:24:23.278 --> 00:24:25.018
We do love you guys.
00:24:25.018 --> 00:24:31.198
We see the people that have been writing for us and that are listening and that are sharing our episodes and are engaging with us.
00:24:31.198 --> 00:24:35.218
I don't want to make you guys feel like we don't see it and appreciate it, so.
00:24:35.577 --> 00:24:48.789
I wanna put out there, we do love and care about you, and just a reminder to take care of yourself first, because kind of like in the episode we talked to Soko in is there's so much going on in the world.
00:24:48.849 --> 00:24:48.940
Mm-hmm.
00:24:49.180 --> 00:24:52.420
That if you don't take care of yourself, you have no business.
00:24:52.420 --> 00:24:52.509
Mm-hmm.
00:24:53.621 --> 00:24:54.881
What is she in the streets?
00:24:54.911 --> 00:24:55.570
What did she say?
00:24:55.675 --> 00:24:57.086
Like, sit the fuck down or something like that.
00:24:57.086 --> 00:24:57.125
Sit the fuck down.
00:24:57.310 --> 00:24:57.611
Yeah.
00:24:57.611 --> 00:24:59.171
She literally said, sit down girl.
00:24:59.201 --> 00:24:59.471
Right.
00:24:59.471 --> 00:25:01.871
And it's like you can't, you have to advocate for yourself.
00:25:01.901 --> 00:25:07.240
'cause you can't always just be an advocate for other people, especially when it's not coming from a place of having a full cup.
00:25:07.421 --> 00:25:07.570
Mm.
00:25:07.601 --> 00:25:10.721
So with that, let us pray.
00:25:11.729 --> 00:25:19.811
Spirit grant me, the serenity to listen to my intuition, the courage to make new choices even when they feel foreign.
00:25:20.487 --> 00:25:25.166
And as always, the wisdom to not read a bitch when they try me.
00:25:25.737 --> 00:25:26.396
Amen.
00:25:26.727 --> 00:25:29.876
And so it is.
00:25:29.876 --> 00:25:29.906
So it is.
00:25:30.416 --> 00:25:30.626
Bye.
00:25:34.922 --> 00:25:37.471
Thanks for tuning in to this week's EA meeting.
00:25:37.592 --> 00:25:43.501
If you liked this episode, please share it with a friend and leave a five star rating and review on Apple or Spotify.
00:25:43.531 --> 00:25:44.612
We'd love to hear from you.
00:25:44.942 --> 00:25:49.082
You can follow us on Instagram and TikTok at empaths and on Pod.
00:25:49.622 --> 00:25:58.142
Don't forget to follow us wherever you listen to podcasts or subscribe to our YouTube channel and turn on the notification bell so you're the first to know when we release a new episode.
00:25:58.471 --> 00:26:00.632
We'll meet you back here on the green velvet couch.
00:26:00.632 --> 00:26:00.811
Next.
00:26:00.832 --> 00:26:01.521
Time.
00:26:01.551 --> 00:26:02.872
Bye feelers.
