Danny Sellers: If you think you're lonely now girl wait until tonight, girl. That's that good shit. When it's cold outside. Girl, you need a real nigga to hold you. This is the kind of shit that they put. Yeah, baby. Yeah, yeah. You thought You put a tip in. And not that. I still put the tip in. Hey, baby, yeah, yeah. ⁓ breathe heavy. Look it look, I'm talking right now, it's it's preseason of cuffin' season, I guess. It absolutely is. It's starting to get a little chilly. Yes, it was hot as fuck. Yeah, LA. It was hundred plus degrees in LA and now sweatshirts. This is the weather that, you know, our forefathers prayed for. I kinda like this. That lived in Los Do you think any black people live in Los Angeles two hundred years ago? Twenty? Two hundred years ago. ⁓ okay. Two hundred? How many niggas what's the over under niggas in LA two hundred years ago? Slave trade. I don't I don't know. I don't know. I don't think they were slaving out here like that. Were they? I don't think they was. I think in LA. I think it was a little bit of free. I don't know my history. I don't know if niggas was free. Well, I'm saying a little bit free of a space. So you know what I mean? Like people go migrate over. And it was also like, you know, Texas, Mexico. Like, you know, like Yeah, I mean Texas was was cooked, but I'm talking about like June the whole Jutin thing. I'm talking about like LA, like, was niggas in Burbank slaves. I'm about to Like where niggas in Studio City like yo Was there like motherfuckers in Studio City like massa? Was it slaves and burp back? I mean when I say slaves, I mean black slaves. I'm sure they're worse. They're worse but they're slaves all over this country. Yeah, no, no. Well they're you know, they're Negroes. ⁓ while you look that up, The Heart of They Fall was a great movie. T the black cowboy vibe in the Western. ⁓ it was fantastic. That was one of the best movies that's why people didn't talk about enough. Also s you scoot over a little bit. Ginger frame. Yeah, okay. ⁓ California entered the union as a free state in 1850, but de facto slavery and forced servitude existed within its borders. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. So yeah. I mean it has. Yeah. Yeah, but yeah. So they had some stuff, but it was a you know, on some chill shit. Like you yo, you can you can work here, but don't leave. Yeah, and watch your mouth. That's what it was. You you you free, but what you watching motherfucking meeting. Anyways, this is dated. Yeah. This is dated. I show that investigates love. And you know what? Sometimes love is love. Sometimes love is freedom. That's why we talked about slavery for the first three minutes. I'm your host, Danny. And ⁓ you know, every episode we talk about different things, current events, love, hate, relationships. And I do that with one of the best I was about to say something cre about to say love makers, but love creators. In the fucking game, man. Pause. That was I need I deserved a pause. Sorry. I I hate a pause. We're allies. I I've always hated a pause. We're allies, but that needed to pause. I always hate a pause. Don't pause me. I don't I here's the thing. If I say it, I mean it. That's the difference between you and I. Torrance Wander makes a noise. Torrance Winder. Woo woo. Yeah. Hey man, look, though hey, the w the weather's turning. All right. If you're already lonely right now, if you spent all summer, I'm g I'm I'm outside summer. I'm I'm I'm cracking. I'm getting cracked. I'm DMing. I'm Dating at the slut. Yeah, making out in the fucking club. I'm making out the part. ⁓ let's go on. I'm going on multiple dates in a day. ⁓ this nigga. You kissed three people at the club and they all saw you kissing them. Ooh, that's disgusting. You know what I'm saying? You're doing, you're doing, you're doing the freak shit, and now you're wondering. I remember the first time I met out with somebody in a bar in college. I was so embarrassed. You were embarrassed because other people saw you? Or you were embarrassed because you were drunk? No, it's embarrassing because people saw me and it was a with a white lady. And ⁓ that shit was crazy. Yeah, I wouldn't. I'm not a big kiss in the club person. I ever, never. But sometimes people would be like, ⁓ let's just do it, you I'm like, all right. And you know, some people be they be kissing the club bar. It's all you reach that weird. At the day party. No, I'm At the day party? Kissing at the day party is crazy. I'm playing. I'm joking, I'm joking, I'm joking, I'm joking. But It is it always weird that couple that's you had the you had a d you on a date and that couple in the corner. It's always like two alt white people making out. Yeah. It's actually It's like go home. It's actually kinda it's actually kinda liberating. When we talk about freedom, that's actually kinda liberating. Just be like just in the club, just locked I'm talking about a bar. I'm talking about like a like a wine bar. It's it's like some two weird one guy in slacks, another good lady in like a fucking library dress. So like you could just be Doing that at the house. I can understand setting it off. Like, boom, we it's second, third day. We don't know we're gonna crack yet. And then we just, ⁓ we get it's the vibe. The vibe. Okay, let's All let's get up out of here. Yeah, let's get our shit and let's go. But it's 130 and you still still making out, asking for another round. Nigga, close the deal. Cause I feel like sometimes that'd be the nigga not closing the deal. Close the deal. Go home. You making out in the club, in the this bar. It's not in the club, a bar. A club is one thing. A club is like we Bob and his friends here in Yeah, it's lit. Oops, my lips touch yours and now we locked in for a little bit. It's eight people in this bar. And you and Miss Sally are in the corner fucking kissing, fingering each other. Yeah. Fingering each other is nasty. That's kinda that's inappropriate. Yeah, fingering some shit in public is is kinda crazy. Off the finger? The finger? 'Cause then we do it your hands, you fucking okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. ⁓ another round, yeah. Yeah, another close it out, yeah. Wait a you want to tip? Don't touch my fucking machine, nigga. Sorry. Thank you so much, nigga. Thank you so much. ⁓ what do you have? Do you have tequila or do you have miscal? Put your fingers away, nigga. This is nasty. That's nasty. Let me think of the fingers, boy. ⁓ shit. The little them little finger fingers is that they go sometimes sometimes they go double platinum though. I'm not The Fingers? I'm not diving into this. Okay, well niggas at the at the wine bar? I'm not doing that. I'm just saying in general. Sometimes the fingers is like Why would you do that? Why would you do that though? You drive you driving home Why would you just My God mustache like I wasn't? You stuck in traffic, like I remember Traffic is crazy right now. Yeah shit. It's taking a minute to ⁓ get home. ⁓ No you you know you about to ⁓ Fiendin' count money. ⁓ okay. About to text and be like, hey Yeah. I'm about to come right back. Exactly. I still teach you. I still smell you. Anyways, yeah. ⁓ that's disgusting. Some of the dirty Mac look, some of the text messages I still t I still smell you all up. Some of the text messages that I've seen Yeah, either from other niggas or things that I've sent. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'm about to say I'm not proud of. As I've gotten older I've been more willing to like vocalize my feelings and shit. Yeah. But early on, I'm like, yo, you will not see. Like as a young adult, I would highly refrain from sending super nasty texts. Cause this the out-of-context screenshot of like 10 years later, five years later, I just could think of the the screenshot on TMZ like comedian, actor, writer, Danny sends freaky dinky texts about something nasty. You know, I'm just like, huh? I think that I'm I think I'm actually the opposite has happened. Where when I was younger, I was ⁓ I should You send an everything. I'm s I'm sending it. I'm sending it. But now as an adult, I'm like, I'm grown as fuck. Yes I can say what I want to say to you. And I want you to know that I want to do this to you. Stam, nigga, that's like a threat. Well no. It it was not a threat. But I want you to know I'm not about beat around the bush. No, we're doing this or we not. Mr. Meat. That's crazy. Well, yeah. Let's put it let's put everything on the table. And I mean everything. Sorry. I want to do this to you. It's crazy. ⁓ let's get to some current events. This nigga this nigga's violent. No, not violence. It's just, you Shorty says I want to do this to you, I'm gonna be like, What you mean by that? She said it. I know, I but I was I but so if I so if someone says so if I say I wanna do this specific thing to you, I wanna do this to you. I'm gonna be happy about it, but I'm gonna also be like, What you mean by that? Yeah, see, cause you w you like to live in that gray. You straight niggas like to live in that gray. I feel threatened. ⁓ I to do this. She said, come here. Yeah. Get over here. Yeah, get over. It's street fight. Yeah, yeah. More combat. She's from the hood. That's what I like. She said, she's a come here. Eating chips and shit. Drop that dick off, nigga. That's what she said. Eating chips and shit before you have sex is nasty. Eating flaming hot? Eating flaming hot. I never dated a girl that eat flamin' hot around me. Is that a is that a is that a that's just a hood snack. Is that a no-go? If you eat chips moments before we crack. I if I can. Well, like moments before you, but I'm just saying in general. If I come in the house and I'm she's sitting on and she's sitting on the couch and she got her flame my hot Cheetos with her legs crossed. Ain't no ain't no way we fucking take it. And her and her glass of wine. There's no chance. Her glass of Taylor Porge. Yeah. I got some flame of highs. I got extra flavor. No, hell no. You I'm I got the extra I got the extra hot con. I got the common lime. Yeah. If you eat flame my hot, you're 100% set me up after this. I'm getting robbed. My car's already. Fucking stick. There's 18 niggas around my Jeep right now because you eating flame of hot. What do you mean? Eating. ⁓ yeah, hey, I missed you. No, you didn't. Where is he at? Where is he at? It's crazy. Cause you obviously finished. You obviously just got done. You eat you eating ⁓ what's the funions? ⁓ funions. ⁓ those those got ⁓ those got a bite back. Those bite back. Not in this economy. No, thank you. You're you're trying to set me up for failure. Anyways, Kurt Events. Mitch McConnell looks he looks like taxidermy. Yeah. So is he technically still in office? ⁓ he's still on it. They don't there's no like That should be illegal. Like that month that motherfucker look stuffed. That should be illegal. Hey, guess who I am? That that's the th I mean, that's barely like, ⁓ pop pop's in the other corner. You know, you you you have older older family members in the other room just sitting. Mm-hmm. He's barely okay to for that job. Yeah. Like pop pop, like, yeah, pop pop is doing his in a in the other corner. You know what I'm saying? Non responsive. Non like this not there's nothing there. There's nobody home. Yeah, that's and y'all are packing his ass y'all stuffed his ass in that wheelchair, rolled him out and put him in that van and everybody talking to him and he just So what are the ramifications? So they're waiting for the election. Yeah. I'm assuming, right? So that they can re elect another person. Mm-hmm. Yeah, like the you know, the midterms are coming Do you know the ramifications of so if he say whatever, say he passes away, what happens? Do you know now? Like if it tomorrow. They w well here's the thing. A lot of a lot of what happens is people who are in the all in office, they hold office for so damn long, never want to step down, whatever. It would have to be I mean, that seat has to be filled with someone else. I just know the process in whatever we can move on. I don't know the process of like somebody passes away. Who's is it like a there's not a vice senator? Like who's the next there's special election there's like a special election type shit? And then yeah, it will be an election for people to then I'm assuming so I'm assuming there's somebody that is not as MAGA leaning or not part of the agenda that is probably ahead of the head of the race or in Kentucky. Yeah, so there's a possibility that then I think it's for all the seats. that are right like, you know, Republican leaning right now that are so like up Donald Trump's ass. Right, right, right, right. There is always the possibility that like some the people will vote in a different direction than what they're looking for because they know that. They understand that. Like this is not a you know what I Like I saw Joe Rogan's ⁓ kind of ⁓ demystify not demi de declaiming or whatever you know some maggots shit. I'm telling right now, the the w and I saw something else about Theo Vaughn, the way a lot of these white boys caped for MAGA because it was like kind of acceptable and cool. Yeah. And now that it's affecting their pockets that they are kind of backtracking from it is some of the sickest shit in the world because there's no way with the things that Trump is doing, none of this feels out of the ordinary what he said he was going to do or what he already did before. Pretty pretty unbrillible. Even even this week he he did the ⁓ he banned CNN and I think MSN ⁓ yes. ⁓ S N now, ⁓ S N B C or ⁓ S N ⁓ from the White House. Like You know, that that's that's one hundred percent ⁓ affecting free press and you know, and one thousand percent. And again, a part of like you said, this is he's doing exactly what he said he was gonna do. No one was no one and I think anyone was any kind of sense isn't like surprised by the shit. I think I think the biggest thing for me, this is not political podcast, we can move on. S white people, especially white men, so often are so privileged that the things that worry us as people of color, especially black people in this country, they don't fathom. So the basis of racism doesn't affect them. So they don't even consider that stuff. But then the systemic stuff, they kind of can still usually overcome those things, whether it be redlining or job discrimination or the lack of DEI, those things aren't gonna affect them. So as niggas, we know things that affect us drastically from our jobs to like the media we see, Hollywood, what's the last black, all black show that we've seen? you know, on on TV and television. Like these things are are dwindling away after we've seen super influxes of all these things. So it the the way white boys can be like, well I didn't think it was gonna happen. It's like, what do you mean? Just because you barely have baked thought about it because you maybe save ten percent of taxes or your LLC can, you know, be more tax efficient, or you just don't give a fuck about blatant racism. That shit pisses me off. And then the way now then I think some of these white boys have tried to come back to our side or be friendly. It's like, bro, if you a white In general, you voted for Maggie Brother. I don't fuck with you. Period. And like they act like nothing never happened. Like, no, nigga, I don't fuck with you. That's still you can't you can't stab me in my back and then a year later be like, Hey, remember I stabbed you in the back? I didn't think it was gonna hurt you. I didn't think I didn't think you was really gonna feel that. I didn't think it was gonna make you I didn't think it was gonna leave a scar. Yeah. I didn't think it was going to literally destroy your world. The scar is there. For for generations. So yeah, I mean, ⁓ the best way and the fastest way to affect somebody is to affect their fucking money. And that's what's ended up happening now and singing a different singing different two. Ed Sharon. This whole Ed Sharon thing. I everyone everyone's talked about this a bunch in the inland. But it is I'm curious your thoughts on the Ed Sharon piece. If you don't know, Mac Lamore was opening up for Ed Sharon and ⁓ in I think a couple of his the first couple ⁓ concerts, he had a free Palestine kind of speech and ⁓ Robert Kraft, the o owner of the Patriots, I think also owns or owns part of the stadium rallied a bunch of these billionaire owners around at these stadiums to say essentially we not gonna let you perform if Mac Lamore's on the on the tour. ⁓ anyways I'm curious of your thoughts on the whole scenario with Yeah. So I think it's ⁓ And Ed Sharon essentially I'm sorry, last thing Ed Sharon was just like, hey I'm I'm Switzerland. I'm neutral. I everybody Yeah is okay. That and that's the To me, the biggest That was the biggest thing. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, the the press is like, ⁓ you know, it's going at it being like, hey, hey, Ed Sheeran, you firing McLamore, you getting rid McLamore on your tour moving forward, yeah, is a problem. It's, you know, it's getting rid of his free speech. It's like, you know, it's it's it's it's so many different like I guess ⁓ he's not standing up for someone's ability and right to speak on the things they want to speak on. Yeah. and a lot of celebrities are coming at and Sharon in this way. And then Shearing's like, Well, I I didn't do this, but also it comes to this the space of it's your tour, right? If people are like, ⁓ you can't come and perform at this place, you know, you perform somewhere else. In my mind, right? I'm thinking about from the perspective of like if if for example, if he said, ⁓ no, McLamarch wanna stay on my tour. Right. Right. And then a bunch of ⁓ there are some venues that won't allow ⁓ What if they'll you venues will allow me to do it? Right. And go there and say, Fuck y'all, I'm gonna stand by someone's ability and write to have free speech. I 'cause that that's that's the thing. It's like, you know, at that level touring is is really contractual and it's it is a different thing, but you know, but at the same time it's like, all right, if these venues are gonna breach a contract, you know what I'm saying? Are you willing to lose this whatever ab however ever much money is Is it whatever whether it's Live Nation or whoever's doing the tour, no, are they gonna allow these venues to essentially renege on the contract because of whatever? You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Like if you if Ed would have said something, it would have forced multiple other people to have to then with also ⁓ a lot of money on the line and be Hold on, Robert Kraft, fuck you. You got you got billions, we also got billions. Yeah. Yeah. If you even allow, but he didn't even allow whatever those those middlemen people to like try to intervene and be like, actually fuck you, Robert Kraft and other owners, or you breaching a contract, we're gonna sue you. Yeah. And then allow them to fold. And I think ultimately everyone's talked about this already, but I think in general for me, I couldn't fathom being an artist and not standing up for a thing. Like I couldn't imagine being an artist and be like, my stance is to be neutral. Yeah. Even though that platform we've built This is not a political show, but I think we've allowed a space to where if something happens in the world, we can talk about it on here and people aren't like shut up and dribble type shit. Yeah. And, you know, we can spend five, ten minutes on and move on, and it's not like the whole premise of the show. But I would never want people that listen to ⁓ to me, whether it be on stage or on this pod, and I'm assuming you the same, to not feel like, ⁓ I Danny's funny, but I don't really agree with his You know, or he doesn't have his own or yeah, or he or he's or he's yeah he's he has skep his his thoughts are I don't really know where he stands. Yeah. Or he's skeptical. We don't have to talk about this for an hour and f and a half, but like you at least know where I stand. Ag nausea just because, yeah. And if you agree with it, you agree with it. If you don't, you don't. I can't control how you feel, but you know where I stand with the shit. And the whole like I'm just neutral thing, I think it's so played out because you're you're an artist. You gotta believe in something. Gotta have something. So for you act like you don't believe in something, it's like book you believe in something. I don't wanna upset this person. I don't wanna upset that person. So I'm just not gonna say anything at all. And then it turns into this big Slame as fuck. Hey, you're not making a stance against anything, and obviously Because I'm not the most politically informed person about every single thing. We right, we just talked about Mitch McConnell and you know the succession of all that kind of shit. I'm not sitting here for an hour and reading on the succession plan for Mitch McConnell. But I know enough to be like, he's a fucking evil, you know, bigot. Yeah and and even even whether he was Republican or Democratic, someone to be that enabled to just do basic functions to still be in office is a problem and our country should like talk about nasty. It's disgusting. On either side, I think that's like w wh what are we what's the we've lost the plot of this whole thing. Of actually serving the people and more so just serving yourselves interests, a specific interest. ⁓ so anyways, I just I think that's a really a shame that Ed Ed as a person If you a MAGA, if you MAGA or you conservative, s just also stand on that. Speak on it. Yeah. At least I know where you stand. But act like you nobody's neutral. I'm sorry. Even if you don't read anything politically, there's certain things that you care about, whether you're like, you know, hey, I don't read the politics, but I'm gay as fuck. Or I r you know, I don't get into politics, but I like money. I like saving bread. I like saving money on taxes. So there's things that you're gonna lean towards either way. The whole neutral thing to me feels like people who are ⁓ afraid to claim their conservativeness. 'Cause they live in a mostly liberal space. Or the opposite too, right? People who are afraid to come out and say that they are as conservative because they're like, ooh, I don't you know what I mean? Like because I'm like, ⁓ I don't you know. Yeah. ⁓ anyways, let's get into some back back to love making and Yeah. Let's talk about sex. Well, hold on. That was too much. That's actually too much for you to to say. Sorry. ⁓ all right. I have this I this is maybe too on the nose for me and maybe we'll see how how deep we get in get into this. Uh-oh. But navigating life after a breakup. I feel like this came to me last week. So I went to this phase post relationship where and I think most people do. It's those like there's so many different levels and moments when you get out of a relationship where you think you may or may not be ready for the next thing. And I think there's like I look back at my own journey and the people that I dated that I gave time to during that journey of like coming out of a long thing, in retrospect, I'm like, today, if those same people can't so if some of those same people came across me today, I wouldn't even consider spending that much time with them. And that's not to say that they're lesser than or they're not something. I just know now that that was never gonna be my person and My discernment is a lot better. Yeah. You know what you want and you know you realize that what we was doing, I don't want that. Yeah. I don't want to do that again and you weren't it. And I'm sure the same for me the story is like, I would never I would never give Danny some coochie if I knew what I knew now. But you know what I'm saying? But it is it is interesting because it's like it shows them different places. Sometimes it's like race, cultural, co culture. ⁓ huh. Like in college, we made jokes but like in college I you know hooked up with a couple of white girls or whatever and like I was open to spending time with a white chick and all that kind shit. Mm-hmm. Then I married a black lady and then I guess after college I I was really ⁓ I don't think I really dealt with any white woman mm-hmm after college. And towards the end of college even really. And then since I've been single again, you know, here and there, you know, did the things and whatever and It was open to it. Why you look at me at this? I'm just I'm ⁓ I you did the things. So why you hold on, why are you looking at me like that? Well, I you said I ⁓ I did the I'm trying to be fucking I'm trying to talk to our audience. You looking at me crazy. I'm not looking at you crazy. You said okay, yeah, you know I have to Well, you have to t give all your information after I go, so we get ready, lock in, buckle up, motherfucker. I'm listening. I'm trying to You better express yourself, fuck nigga. You over here looking at me, nigga. It's time for you to yeah, spill the beans too, bitch. Go, continue. Anyways. ⁓ but as I gotten as I've gotten more and more single, more and more, you know, older, it's like I'm not like, ⁓ I can't never ever date a white woman, but I think it's just harder if someone's not culturally similar to me. Uh-huh. One thing it's 'cause it's isn't it's nothing like against us, you know, race certain races of people or whatever, but it's like culturally I have to feel comfortable in all aspects of life with you and your culture, whether our culture is the same. Or even if it's slightly different, it has to feel and it's and it and at this age, it's not even just you and I, it's f our families. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So you might be the cool white chick, but then your daddy like kind of doesn't like black people, or your, you know, your sister's kind of whatever. She says weird things to me, you know. And I think those kind of things is what like stops for me, Danny, exchanging cultures in that sense as much. Like I said, it's it's not impossible. But it does make it way harder because we're just so different. We might be alike on so many other things physically. We might both like art and wine and other shit. But like culturally, do we like the same music? Mm-hmm. Do we have a similar sense of style? Yeah. Do your parents believe in some of the similar thing? You know, am I the first black person your daddy's ever had in his house? Type shit. You know, like all those things can weigh on you when you're talking about building a life with somebody. I'm not even talking about just casually fucking, I'm talking about building a life with somebody. And race is one part, but even just like goals, even whether you made it or you are struggling your ass off, you have four roommates. There's a certain level of like, ⁓ I see this person has a certain level of drive that even if they haven't made it and maybe they even never make it big, I can tell they're gonna be okay. And there's l certain level of consistency that my consistency and your consistency can match to where we can least build a a healthy life together. Yeah. And I think when you're just fresh out of a thing, you're exploring new things, all these new shiny toys and people. Toys is kind of fucked up. That was hilarious, actually. But we're all whatever. We're all things, people, toys, whatever, moments, energies, all these different energies around us. It's like, ⁓ I'm willing to like accept that or like explore this thing. And as as I get older, I'm just like, I don't know if that would have ever worked out. Have you I know you got a couple like long-ish things, but have you ever found yourself in that? place where like, ⁓ this is actually never was never gonna be good for me. Yeah. And I entertained it because this is the first person I'm dated that had a good job. The first person I dated that was like physically attractive. That sometimes be tricky too. You date a f a little some fine shit and it's like you actually suck as a person. I will I will say that ⁓ this actually I had this conversation maybe two couple weeks ago. Why aren't you saying ⁓ And I was I can I can confidently say that everybody that I have dated has been fine as fuck. I can confidently say that one of them came across my timeline the other day and I said, God damn, you got good taste. That's crazy. Do I want them? No. But I can still look at you and say, Damn, you still fine. You ain't shit and you fucked up, but you're fine as shit. Yeah. And I've never been in this situation where I was like, ⁓ my God, I don't know what I was thinking. Looking at you, I can't it's more about personality for me, that's really been the the people. ⁓ in my experience, ⁓ I think after in this scenario of sort of like the phases after the breakup itself, I I have been open and I've dated, been on dates with multiple people of different races. The only thing I can't really get Philip behind a Filipino man for sure. Why specifically the Filipino man? Some little short Filipino nigga that likes, you know. I'm not. So so beginning. The one thing I can't really get behind is like what like you said, culturally, I what I don't need is you ⁓ you know, white man to be like, Hey, can I wear your do rag? 'Cause that would drive me crazy. ⁓ yeah, yeah. You what I Like it's just little things like like that alone like and again, it's so innocent in the mind of the world. But for me, I'm like, okay, so we're this is not gonna happen. I can't do this. ⁓ and so I typically do again align culturally with people who I don't have to explain stuff to. ⁓ Yeah, that part's tough. Yeah, it's it's different. And it's and again, different being black and queer and growing up black and queer, like the experiences that I had are very specifically that. Well, Kurt, quick question on that, or not even question but statement. Sometimes Even if some if a if ⁓ culture is like of color, even if you put me on different like foods and like different customs, that's even a different experience than like this sound it I don't wanna sound racist, but like I gotta explain to a white person a very basic black thing that sometimes even is like not just like a a food or a culture thing, but like a safety issue. Like a microaggression. Uhhuh. Uhhuh. That's the difference. You know what I'm saying? You Asian or you, you know, brown, you put me onto a thing, it's like, okay, this is like a food thing. This is a a custom. This is a thing you do and this is a vibe. Cool. I'm learning some shit. But I gotta teach you like, yo, it's not okay to like talk about somebody's hair, you know, touch the short somebody's hair or whatever. Like when we walk into a space, I'm ⁓ I'm more aware of things than you are because you're a white. Like those are certain things that That can be actually exhausting. Yeah. It absolutely. It's like extremely draining, except extremely just like, you know, just ⁓ small shit that, like you said, that isn't that big of a deal. It's not that big of a deal, but it is a big deal when I have to break it down and then explain to you and then try to get you well, I don't understand. Well, bitch, I'm not I don't there's nothing I can say now because you don't get it. And we're just gonna have to move on from this. And I think I find and I or I have found. That there have been multiple instances where attempting to date outside of my race in that particular way has lent to those types of conversations more often than not, in my experience, right? So but even getting off race, because that's one piece of it. I think l a a big thing for me is is like your, you know, morality is one, but like your work ethic and whatever you like, your passion. Because I'm not I I like I'm I like to work hard. ⁓ you know, even daily we get up every Saturday or Sunday and record sometimes when we had a long night or whatever. We haven't missed a week yet since we've been doing this podcast. And that just shows one part of the work eth ethic. But for me it's like as an artist and someone who tends to date artistic shorties, I think that's also important that someone is like cares enough about their dreams to follow through and like put the effort and be consistent. And you know, you being good at it or or whatever is also another added like attractive bonus. Like, yeah, you really are talented. I see the vision. Even if you're not big, I see the vision and like this is fly and I ⁓ am happy and excited to see where your career goes. But it's nothing worse than someone who's like really stuck down and up and is complaining about it but doesn't do shit about it. And that's the thing, that's what it is for me, right? That's what I was gonna say. Cause my thing is If you're fine with where you are and you're good and you got a good and you're and you're comfortable and this is what you like and this is your vibe and you're com and you're happy, actively happy, I'm image. I'm good. I'm low-key image of me. I love this shit. I actually love this shit. But if you are very unhappy and there is nothing you're doing outside of going to work and coming home, and you're complaining about every single thing that has gone wrong in your life, and there are multiple ways that you know you can even try. You could even attempt. You know what I mean? It's it's the attempt to try and put yourself out there, to try to change your life, to try and do something else. Cause if the job market's hard, shit's crazy out here, economies d you know, f we're fucked like big time. But if you're gonna try to put yourself out there and do those things, then we got something to talk about. And it's specific yeah, it's it's kinda specific to yeah, artists, 'cause I'm you know, if you're an accountant, it's like You rinse and repeat, you know, it's kind of the deal. You want a promotion every whatever two years, but it's if you but if you like being an accountant. Right, I'm then you I mean if you hate your fucking job as an accountant, right, right. And all you do is come home. No, I also I sometimes I hate when people act like they don't like what they do, but they actually do. Like sometimes you'll meet a shorty who's like likes doing one creative thing, but then will act like they don't love their job. It's like you kinda like it. You kind of like the you like the consistency, you like you the consistency in your reschedule, the consistency in the paycheck and and the simplicity of it. And you just like doing this one you like to sing on the weekends or you like to fucking paint or you like to do yoga. But like you're not you're never gonna be a painter or a yoga instructor or whatever. This is what you actually kinda like this and this is and that's fine. Like keep it as a hobby. Yeah. But sometimes I think when you when shorties meet me or other creative people, they try to like we all do this, I'm sure. Act like more we're more than we are. And it's like, no, you're you're an accountant that that Paints. You know, you're not a painter that has a day job who's like trying to get out. Sure. I think it's like you said, it kind of goes to the identity part of it. It's like I don't want my identity to be to be connected to my day job and what I do and what I work, like how I work or whatever. But similar to that, it is that sort of, you know, with the entrepreneurial boom and the creative boom that's happening, right? With this ⁓ everyone needing, you know, wanting to be an entrepreneur, everyone thinking that they can't. Not sorry. This is gonna sound bad. But I'm gonna say it anyway. Please do some of y'all, and this may be my toxic take. Some of y'all aren't built to be entrepreneurs. ⁓ yeah, yeah. Some of y'all are meant for to be a cog in that wheel to keep that shit rolling and going. And there's nothing wrong with that. Everybody needs somebody to come in and do that work and handle business. I'm gonna be honest. Me going to work legitimately in my soul, yeah, pains me. Burns. And I would s you know, ⁓ I I maybe I'm over sharing, maybe some of my co-works listen to this, I don't know. Yes. And I live in a and I work in a creative space with creative people ninety percent of the time. Most of my conversations about creativity and art and making writing and ideas. In that setting, and I'm still good at it, and I do it at a high level. But if you ask me, Danny, how do you feel about this? I it genuinely pains me. Yeah. Yeah. And and because I am such a entrepreneurial, wildcar, free spirited kind of nigga. you know, that is so so was no people act like they are also that, but they're like, ⁓ I'm going to work. It's like, no, no, no, no, no. We're not the same and that's fine. But let's not act like we are the same in that sense. And I think going back to the the actual premise of like navigating life after breakup, it's like having those different scenarios presented to you from other people, it like it's helped me like figure out I guess my type. And this is actually a a listener submission that someone Submitted. What is your take on types and do you have one? Ooh. Is and was the question. Do you know you do you have I think I have mine. I think I have it down packed. Yeah. But do you feel like you have yours? I don't think I have a type. I 'cause for me a type, you know, you ask what my take is on types. I think types early young, I had a type in college. You know my type. It was it was a lot of the same. Zach came kind of shorty. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. ⁓ yeah, a lot of aka's. A lot of a lot of you know those. So many of those. A lot of you know North Carolina bills. So many of those. Sorry. No, it was a lot. If you were aka in North Carolina in 2012-13, stay away from me. He tried to stunt. Stay away. If you were ⁓ you if you remember Alpha Capital Alpha from the years of of spring twenty twelve until until ⁓ December 2015. Danny in the in the group me, hey yo, ⁓ the case throwing ⁓ yeah pull ⁓ we going yeah yeah yes if you were within what 50 minute drive, wake for us what Duke UNC Chawan ⁓ my God UNC Pembroke. I'm on the way, nigga. ⁓ my And T Greensboro. We shut it down. If you aka and Greensboro, you've used AK and Greensboro in the year of 2013 of our Lord. Yeah. I'ma at least ask what's your major? What you like to do. Yeah. What's your are you? ⁓ you the fucking timekeeper? That's what's up. That's what's up. Me too. What would you know? ⁓ you the you the you the tw 13th? ⁓ you're You the tw you the thirteenth you the thirty third honcho? Yeah. Yeah you the eighty eight eighty eighth honcho? That's what's up. You number eighty eighth honcho, that's what's up, girl. ⁓ You wanna you one on five? ⁓ okay, that's what's up. You one ⁓ five. Yeah, but types. Yes, I'm sorry. Sorry. Yeah, you number forty six. Yeah, that's what's up. You your licences is, huh? You know all your licences? You a tail, I'm a tell. What's the And you legacy, well, your mama was ⁓ you went to spot. ⁓ my goodness. Yeah, you was an AKA back in the day. If you was a AKA back in the day and you was a a Neo, I'm gonna I'm coming to the probate. Like man, what's who crossed? Congratulations. Yeah. Congratulations, fam. We haven't we haven't a homecoming party, nigga. Yeah, meanwhile, I just had my little my little side missions every time. ⁓ y'all go. Yeah, Torrance be pulling up. I sure would be missing and disappear. What's up? Some of them niggas, yeah, niggas don't know life. Life before Uber was a different kind of lifestyle. Life before Uber? Life before Uber is like, look, I'm gonna drive there sober. Yeah. Then we're gonna park. We're gonna get there. We're gonna try to get that 30 minutes before. Mm-hmm. Drink. Yeah, let's see her. Let's see. Okay. Boom. All right. Boom. It's gonna be three or four of us in the car. Yes. Somebody driving. Maybe. Maybe it's five. ⁓ yeah. Easily. Maybe five six. ⁓ I've d I've done I've done the six in a coop. Sitt sitting laying on the lap. Yeah, yeah. Lay down, lay down, hold on. Idealistically it's four niggas. Ideally, yeah, it's four. It's four, maybe two cars. But maybe f but we'll but we'll do five. Easy. Simple. So easy. But towards the end of we're like see junior senior year it was like, all right, we're gonna we're gonna do three. Somebody else maybe four. A couple people had cars, so it was easy. And and I'm telling you advanced, I might not come home tonight. Exactly. So There's least a spot for somebody else to yeah. You might want to drive niggas. I might not come with anyways. So boom. But if it's all of us, three, four of us, boom. One it's either usually me. Me and Kyle drove a lot. You drove sometimes. I drove sometimes too, but I had to coop, so my car was. Yeah, right, right, right, right. So it was so it's usually me and me or Kyle or Jordan sometimes to drive. If it's a different set of niggas. But anyways, driver, drive you drive there sober. You might have a beer before you drive sober. So like we cutting the odds down of getting in trouble. By half because we just not we're not drinking on the way there. Exactly. Y'all might have something in the back, something chill, but nothing crazy. We're not really going crazy in the car. Cause we're being smart on the way back, we've been we already hedging our bet against, you know, all safety. So we're not gonna on the way there, we're gonna chill for the moment. We gonna exactly we gotta be responsible. Yeah. They already looking for niggas. Yeah, y'all starting to drink. So it might it's North Carolina, like you already gotta be like you might put us you might put something in the cup, but we're not just having passing bottles around type shit. We chillin' absolutely and then boom, we get there thirty minutes before. Mm-hmm. I'm taking A shot every four minutes. Yeah. In the car. Sitting waiting. Yeah. In the parking lot playing some music. A C playing. You what I'm saying? So now by the time and it but it's it's that thirty minute of like we getting lit. Yeah. Me as the d as the driver. Yeah. And so maybe that might be eleven thirty, twelve, maybe. A little bit earlier because a bit earlier. Yeah, 'cause it it was North Carolina. So maybe a little bit earlier. Yeah. You might get there at ten thirty. Yeah. And we walking out at eleven eleven, yeah. So now I'm bu I'm buzzing. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Me andor somebody else buzzing, walking into the joint. We're having a good time. We lit. And it's n it's college in North Carolina. So it also for the most part there weren't like bars. Yeah. A lot of the parties will be there'll sometimes be bars, but like, you know, sometimes it wouldn't be. It'll just be like a a party kind of scenario. At a at a at someone's room, a dorm room, or an event or something like that. Whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Event space. So then you boom, you do that. And so then the party goes until 2, 130, 2. And then you like might linger, talk, whatever. So by the time you get back in the car, it's been about three, four hours. So like doing the alcohol math, it's like, right, like it's been three, four hours. I'm decent, but I'm fine. I got some water. Now we driving back home if we go back home that night. But we take we We like being careful. The music's low. The music's low. Calm down. Like everybody chill. Everybody chill out. Everybody chill the fuck out. Yeah, we the music low, nigga. Everybody chillin', everybody vibing. Don't act, don't act crazy. We're playing some whiskhalifa. We're playing some kid cutty. And the crazy thing is where we cause where we went to school and versus where we were. Going most times, it was at least 45 minutes. And I mean like with no traffic. Yeah, right. Like there's no traffic. It's we're going 70 and it's taking us 50 minutes to taking a solid 45 to an hour to It's hundred miles away. And it's and it's exactly it's and it's insane. And you gotta be focused and you gotta be like, all right, y'all, like chill out. What ⁓ like it was ⁓ man. Man, that shit was that shit. The good old days. Yeah, remember I remember one time it was like people, it's like some shorties, some girls that we went to school with. Somebody like left without him. It was like we were like six deep in like Kyle's car or one. ⁓ I do remember. I wasn't I wasn't there for that one. I wasn't there for that one. It was like, yeah, we were f already four or five deep and then anyway, one of our anyways. That was those some fun times. But types. Sorry, go back to types. Back in the day, aka's if you were AKA with a good GPA in 2013, I we gotta have a conversation. When I was young, I didn't have a type. When I was I don't think I because I was like, I I guess. I guess I like niggas now, so let's see what this is. Let's see what let's see what what is what do I like? What don't I like? Who who Yeah, I would say physically it's le it's more agnostic now. Like as I've gotten older. Like, you know, the the basic aka, you know, stereotype is is less and it's more of like of course you gotta be cold, you gotta be fly, you gotta be cute and pretty, beautiful, all the things. But it's like you can be short, you can be tall. You have short hair, you can have long hair. I like I like just a sense of style and a sense of self identity in your style, whether it be your home, you how you dress, so you have to have like a a a certain kind of look and feel to you. And I can even change it evolve over time, but like are you making statements in the way in which you present yourself to the world, or are you just wearing like you know, Banana Republic every day? You know what I'm saying? They're not a sponsor. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like and and shout out to me They won't be no, I'm kidding. You whatever. No, no, no, no, no. You know what I'm saying? Like you wearing you just going to fucking J. Crew and Band Republic and just wearing the same shit. It's like, okay. Get a fit off is what you say. Yeah, get a fit off. Have some tattoos, maybe. Like, you know, whatever whatever the thing is. Have some type of self expression and have that be Take a chance with colors. Wear some shit that's weird sometimes, but like you fit getting it off. And then on the other end, I think, ⁓ intrinsically it's like, yeah, are you self motivated? Are you consistent? Are you like do you have people that in your circle that you fuck with that you're consistent with? 'Cause there's nothing weirder than a shorty who hates all of her friends, but she spends times we talked about it before, that spends times with her friend. It's like Or somebody who ain't got no friends. That is a huge I didn't know how much of a huge red flag this was until my last well not my last one, but the one before. I didn't realize how bad it was until I was like, ⁓ this is Yeah, if if if you don't know how to show up to be a friend for people, which is why you don't have no friends. So how the hell you finna show up for me. Even if you don't have a lot, but if there's not one or two names that you say consistently, yeah. So and so, you know, yeah, Torrance. I was talking to Torrance, I was talking to Kyle, I was talking to Jordan, whatever. Yeah, but just like you don't have no real connection with other 'cause you don't know how to do that, right? You don't have the the The wherewithal to actually be like, ⁓ no, I can I know how to be a friend to you, I know how to support you, I know how to show up for you, I how to do all that shit. If you don't know how to do that, then we ain't got nothing to really talk about. Fuck you at all. What's your type, nigga? ⁓ my type, my type, my type. I don't think I have one. I've dated short, tall, data. Date fat niggas? Like, huh? You date fat niggas? I can see you like a little chubby church. I've dated I've dated bigger niggas. I can see you with like a a nigga that's like a youth like a chubby youth pastor, like a little fat like a Luther Van Dross ass nigga. A Luther f a Luther? Yeah, I can I can see you like a little like five eight little Luther little mini Luther. I don't want to date a youth pastor. Like a mini coop ass nigga. Why would I date a youth pastor? Like he but he he used to be, but he's like, yo, you I'm I'm doing my gay shit now, so I'm not doing that anymore. But like I for like eight years I was a youth pastor. I'm not I can see you on that kind of way. I'm not, no, not at all. I I don't have a type, which is what I found out. ⁓ again. I've dated somebody who was six three, I dated somebody who was five six. I'm the only one who was ⁓ light skinned, very, very light skinned. How much of that of that gay shit is like, yeah, the ⁓ you meet somebody that you like, this is gonna it's a crazy question. No, go ahead. But you meet somebody you like, a vibe is like, yeah, nigga, I'm a I'm a bottom nigga. Or I'm a top. How much like is that like a political stance? Like I'm a Republican, I can't date you. I wouldn't say as a political stance, well, here's the thing. Because because while there are tops, there are verses. I'm sorry, bottoms, they're verses. ⁓ shit. And versus beats you do b yeah, yeah, you do both. ⁓ you yeah, you flip and you do both. Versus I a top and a bottom. And you got now you got people who sides. Now the sides, they don't do penetration. They just be doing all the the oral stuff. What the fuck? Yeah, yes. It's a lot. It's a lot going on in the in the queer community. So it's like for me personally, Without saying too much and saying everything, that shit don't matter to me. Type shit. Okay. I don't, I don't, I don't date based on whether you're that. I don't look for that going out the box. that doesn't really matter to me. As long as you're a good person and you cool, you chill, you fine. and you got some sanity. I think a lot of people got no fucking sanity, right? That's really what it is. A lot of people, especially, especially like queer men. I think like we're in there's like this bubble of just like, hey, I just want Sex like some like on the on the dating apps, which I've deleted all my dating apps. So really if you want to yeah, if you want to get with me, you gotta fucking Instagram. That's why you're outside is that's why you're outside today. That's why we're outside today. I gotta I gotta meet somebody. I gotta meet somebody today because ⁓ the dating apps are done. I'd ask this nigga. We've been talking for like I wanna say three weeks that's too much on hinge. Anything more than a week. Sure. Message it back and forth three weeks on hinge, try to link up, it didn't work out. And so yesterday I said, Hey ⁓ circling back I was like hey to circle back is there any interest in us like actually hanging out or do you just want to like talk in between you know the chaos of the of everything he said yes ⁓ and I said Good night I said nigga have a good one I wouldn't even I wouldn't even said nothing I just would have take care 'cause that was the craziest shit I've ever heard in my life. Yes. Yes? To a or question, I slap the shit out of you. But I'm not gonna do that. I'ma just block you and then ⁓ and I would say this is weird. This is strange. I can't have a real conversation. I can't really get to know you. No, it's bad. For real. Like it's it's pretty bad. So I will say, ⁓ my type is ⁓ I I'm I'm in the people that are into me. Okay. Yeah. Okay. And you and you would do the long distance thing too. I would do the long distance thing. I think I would. It's kinda What's the age range? A ra age range youngest is Think 30. Youngest. Yeah, younger just thirty-four. Young that's interesting. Yeah. Younger just that I think it's men are just different. Men and d men are different. I'm so sorry. But I was talking to a young lady about this last night. I think that this it's also like a shoehorn effect because older I've we were talking about a lot of ⁓ older ladies, quote unquote older ladies dating younger men. Mm-hmm. And that's a kind of a thing that's that's common. ladies in their forties date niggas in their you know thirties, sometimes even late twenties, like, you know, I think share one of them one of them old short ages is dating like a young man. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. But and that's common. It's kind of become a thing because there's so many men in their like late forties, fifties, even sixties who like miss the whole like we're gonna think about s mental health and like not we're gonna attempt to be not problematic. Like our age, thirty four, mid thirties, twenties, you know, we've grown up in a space of like It's okay to cry. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? It's even even as a baseline. Like, it's okay for you niggas to like cry and like And you're getting it out somehow. Like you're you're not like a ball of like I'm a beat the shit up. It's okay to go to it's not gay to go to therapy. You know what I'm saying? Like all that kind of shit. So like You know makes you gay? Taking it up the buttons. Well Torres, this is a sorry. This is not that kind of show. I'm sorry. This is a PBS. You said it's not gonna Thank you to our sponsor. Thank you to our sponsor PBS. For holding us down. Don't look all I'm saying is that's what makes you gay. 500 club. Thank you to Ashmash 500 Club. Remember that? The 500 Club? I do. I do remember. Late night, we trying to jack off. If you ever jacked off your dick, you are going to burn forever. Like, hold on, what? This passage says, Yeah, if you were black, any black niggas jack it off, you are going to hell forever. ⁓ Even twelve thirty, like damn, nigga. Hold on. What the fuck? Yeah, how'd you know this? Creflo Dollar, nigga. What the fuck? Yeah, if you ever beat no little shit off. ⁓ my God. My favorite was the the guy who did the ⁓ Pastor Kearney. ⁓ was it the the oil nigga? No, the personal prayer package. ⁓ yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But God is the whale. You got your personal prayer package. My next rebrand is the ghost. To Texas and open up a small church and just get breaded up. ⁓ my God. I tell you what, you would be so successful if you religion is one of those successful things. Religion is so successful. If I if I wanted to be a pastor, it'd be a rap for y'all. Nonprofit. Could you imagine the amount the amount of money I could get just the suits? If I just said I'm gonna wear suits, 'cause I wouldn't be one of those sneaker pastors. Yeah. I wouldn't be a yeah, I mean, yeah, they're getting they getting they profits. It's a profit. But I wouldn't be one of them sneakers and t-shirt pet pastors. I'm putting my shit on. I'm putting suit. I don't trust. If you a pastor, you got Jordans on, don't talk to me, nigga. Yeah. I need you to have a Lincoln or a Cadillac or a big, ⁓ wide-body Mercedes, you know what I'm saying, in the parking lot. Something hard, like you said, hard body, something that's steel. Like hard, like, yeah, you gotta, you gotta have a suit and tie on. You gotta be up there sweating. I don't want you to have a t-shirt on and a and a fucking button down. No, nigga. Yeah, you got on, you got on, you got on army fatigue. Shorts. Yeah. Yeah. Ugh. You got outside. You got on breads. And now fuck no, nigga. Yeah, you got a shirt that says you need Stacey Adams. I need some Stacy Adams. Yeah. I need you up there sweating. I need you. I need you, you know, we need the we need to have a we need to unbutton the unbutton and then when you get serious, you button it back up. Yeah. Hey man, once you you know they come back now and they come back. Let me get myself digging. Let me gather myself. Yeah. Have some respect about y'all. Yeah. But if I yeah, if I chose to be a pastor, ⁓ it'd be a rap. Yeah, would be like, Yeah, Danny preaching, yeah, Danny yeah I'm going to the eight a.m service. Danny, you getting you getting yeah. We get and we getting active. Yeah, but they I'll have a eight a.m server. Eight a.m a and a little ten thirty? 'Cause it's gonna be long. We would be in that bitch long, like yeah, dawg. We ain't watching no football today, nigga. We finishing right when the game kick off. Like, all right. Amen, amen. Yeah, churches I'm religious, not really, I'm spiritual, I believe in God, but churches Church is interesting. Church is chur church is tough. We could we could definitely have a conversation. We probably should. We probably should have a conversation. I think I think it's about time we have dating church and dating. I think we gotta have religions and dating. We gotta have a religion and dating. That would be so much let's think about that. I have a couple of people who I think could come in and talk about that. Might let's have a conversation. Yeah. ⁓ what was I about to say? ⁓ yeah, your type. Yeah, I mean that's a good type. You have a good anyways. ⁓ every episode we ⁓ we already did one of them was that was taking your your take on types. Yeah. But ⁓ every episode we have So I Dated. These are listener submitted questions, comments, concerns, stories, things that we have to dissect. This is a show that investigates love, and we're gonna investigate another question from our audience, Torrance. All right. So I'm dating someone who is still financially connected to their ex. They've been broken up for almost two years, but they still had a joint phone plan until I made him stop. And they still have a couple streaming accounts. Even he even helps, he even helps her with her car payment because they bought the car together. He insisted there was nothing romantic happening and said untangling everything was just complicated. But every month, when that payment comes out, I'm reminded that his ex is still very much in the picture. I know it's hard out here, but like. Am I a bitch for saying to cut that shit out? This is so funny because I was in the same situation. And we're when you're with somebody, you're gonna have joint shit. Phone streaming. It was funny because I had my ex's ⁓ Netflix on mine. This is TMI, but this is funny. I don't I don't think she would give a fuck. we broke up, you know, when you got the share joints, you just like we was on the we just on the same thing. But when we broke up for like a at least a year, I was just like on her sister's profile. I'm enough of it. I was running I was running it up on her sister's profile. Cause it's multiple profiles. So to like hide that I was still using it, I was on her sister's shit. Like that's kind of the funniest shit. That's actually really great. I was like, yo, let me just keep it. That's that's really fucking funny. Cause my my Apple TV was one of one of the family apples, you know, whatever. So when I fuck we broke up, I was like, you I it was still only. I'm not gonna not use it. I'm not gonna not use it. I'm not gonna delete. I'm about to delete Netflix and then re-sign up. That's that's ridiculous. I will say that I was using my ex's Apple TV account because it was the family thing. Yeah. Because we were we was real tight. So I was in this family thing. For maybe two years. Yeah, yeah. A solid two years after. Cause again, you're not checking that for real, but I'm I'm running it up. Yeah, Max. I'm running your shit up. Max was on my phone bill for probably a good year or so after. You know, it's just And it was funny because when he got rid of it, like like got me out of his family thing, I said, ⁓ And he was like, ⁓ were you using it? And I was like, ⁓ no. Yeah. ⁓ no. Okay. And then all of a sudden your subscription is okay. I was like The covers over you. ⁓ no, I'm not I'm not watching it. I'm using I don't watch I don't even watch anything on there. I don't watch nothing on Apple TV. I watch I watch nothing. You on the couch caked up, nigga, watching Severance, nigga. I had to get it back to watch Severance. That is so funny. It went no no. So I I think I think with this particular question. She was on mine too. I'm sorry. She also had my Amazon. So I just had to sh ⁓ she might still have I don't know. I just had to change the name to Guest. I think I changed the password, so it was probably not anymore. But for a while, I had my it's it was similar. That's what it was. It was mutual assured destruction. So she had my Netflix and or she had my Amazon and I had her Netflix still. And maybe some other shit. It was like one or two things was between us. So she had her profile, so I just changed the name to Guest. It's cause like it's not like I I have a shorty over and I go pick Amazon. It's like Danny and You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I mean, and that's weird. So since I would just put guests, so it was like it was a vibe. It was like never never cause I got caught up once. I'm like, ⁓ shit, let me just who so and so? I'm like, that's my sister, you know, about a lot. But my cousin, my cousin got my shit. You know, she loves she loves reacher. I told her fine, like I guess I wouldn't. Yeah, hunger games. Hunger games. But ⁓ but after a while I think the passwords kind of either you have to you know change the passwords or whatever. But for a minute, yeah, it was like, nigga, it's lit. Like we just it especially you got the different profiles now. You don't really ⁓ and especially if they have one or two and you got one or two, let's just we don't have to rush into this separation part of it. I think let's take our time. Let's take our let's take a beat. Cause life is hard out here. And she said it. She said, I know times is hard, and it is hard out here. But what I will say is after two years. You helping to pay for somebody's car after a two year breakup. I know y'all got that thing together. That I don't I don't I this is tough 'cause it's financially related. And I wonder how much money they have, but go ahead. Yeah, like it's a it's a tough thing. gotta divest eventually. Eventually you gotta cut that call. In two years is it It's a long time. Two years it can become a long time. That's a long time. I would be curious if the if the car payment cause sometimes, you know, depending on who bought it, if there's co-signers that could affect that could that could affect you. So like it might put my money in. Unfortunately it might behoove you to keep paying so you don't isn't ding your credit or something like that. ⁓ But ⁓ yeah, I mean, I feel like my ex was on my phone playing for a minute. After a while, you know, it was just a simple text like, yo, all right, you know, I'm about to separate this shit. Yeah, and then trip over it. You it was this is like You you know, you go I don't know. I think we go through a breakup to be s kind of serious again. When you go through a breakup, it is so hard, especially when you that involves somebody, you live with somebody, that like there's so many phases of like grief you go through and like exha pure exhaustion from displacement that you go through that like you don't wanna have to face every single thing at once. So that initial conversation of like we don't wanna be together, and then there's ⁓ another conversation, there's a follow-up, then it's finalized, and now I'm moving out. Now gotta find a spot, but then ⁓ I gotta come back and get my fucking, you know, my fucking drawer of knick-knacks that I forgot. You know, it's that whole shit. So then you finally kind of day to day, I have no more ties to you. That's assume you don't have any kids or dogs or whatever. Then it's like all these little sm other small loose ends. ⁓ there's still a joint account that we gotta fucking figure out. There's a, you know, all these little trivial things that aren't that important. It's like I kind of just want to. separate my life a little bit. Sometimes it's easier to lose out on two hundred bucks a month or a hundred bucks a month or fifty bucks a month for the time being for my peace of mind and also like my healing than to like I gotta cross every single thing off of your list immediately. Or yeah, in order for you to feel like ⁓ I'm the whatever. I'm kinda 'cause that's a diva cause that's another touch point and I gotta text and call by the way, that you know, yeah. It's a lot. I don't I don't think you're a bitch for for saying cut it out and like be like, hey, like let's you you gotta cut that shit out. I don't think I don't think it makes you a bitch, but I do think it is it may take longer than you think to like you said, like to to unwind all those things. Now granted, it's almost been it's they've been broken up for almost two years. That's a long time. So like at some point you had to know what's coming. Like, you know, like both parties gotta know that one person or the other would be like, hey, so But also if you only if if it's two years and you've only been dating for a year or so, you gotta also chill too though a bit. If someone if I was with somebody for a minute, my life was combined with somebody and we've been dating for nine months, a year. If I I say I think of it from the perspective of like, okay. You gotta chill. Yeah, like if you've dating somebody and you got combined finances with your ex and then you and I date and Things are getting serious enough for us for for this to even be a conversation, right? Cause I think within the nine months to a year, I'm not necessarily like checking your finance. Like that ain't got shit to do with your money. I'm not asking you where your money's going within a year, nine months of us being together. I'm not asking I don't, I don't, I don't know where your money is going. So I'm assuming, right? And this is my assumption, if this is, if this is coming up in this capacity, I'm assuming it must be affecting. Yeah. Her in some capacity. I'm assuming that I'm making that assumption, right? I could be fucking but I've had I've had this scenario where I've been over to Shorty and it wasn't that it really wasn't. Like I was helping a family member out and she knew about it. Either whether it be I told her or I can't remember how she found out. Mm-hmm. But ⁓ it was kind of a problem. And but it wasn't affecting us financially. Like, you know, maybe like some of our goals that we were thinking about. you know, life and planning and those kind of things. But it there was n we weren't like about to go without any of our basic necessities and our even our lifestyle wasn't going to be affected by helping a family member out. You know what I'm saying? So I think sometimes people just know things and then it's like, well that five hundred dollars or that two hundred dollars or that one hundred dollars could go towards me in a different way. And it's like, sure. But also They need like somebody need like Yeah, and I think w a real person, think about like our your real aunties and uncles that like whether they're Whether their relationship is great or not behind closed doors, like people that are really part of your family. Yeah. I think about that part when I'm thinking about a serious relationship, it's like this person is part of my family. And you and I is important, it's the core. But for us to really be family, we also have to think about other people's family. There's an understanding. There's an understanding that, hey, while we are important together, this is our union that we're being building together. Yeah. These are the branches to our how we even came to be. Yeah. I can't ignore them. You can't I don't expect you to ignore your people, right? Right, yeah. Within reason. Like you know what I mean? Within reason, obviously. Like nobody, ⁓ hey, I need, you know, ⁓ fifty dollars because ⁓ like yeah, but if if your mama lose her job or something and she has to move in with us or something, like that that those are things that like as a grown ass man, I'm never gonna be like, No, your mama can't like is it an inconvenience? Yes. Absolutely but It is what it is. This is what we signed up to do to make sure that we are there to support each other. And part of supporting you is supporting your family. And I'm the kind of person, even if you know, your mom or some your sibling, you know, because sometimes people are are full of shit. Sometimes they really come on just hard times. Yes, yes, yes. If s someone I know that's part of your family that is gets up, goes to work every day, but they lost a job or they got injured or whatever, something just happened that's out of their control, but they're a hard working person, I'll also At that point, if you're my person, will be willing to say, All right, I will adjust my lifestyle to accommodate. You know what I'm saying? Your mom gotta stay with us or we gotta help pay your mama's rent for a couple months, then okay, then yeah, we'll maybe fucking not go out to eat twice a week. You gotta figure out how we can come in, how we can come in and support your family just as much as I would hope if some big issue happened on my side which is uncomfortable. It's not that fun, but like it sucks. You talk about holistically living life combining collaborating lives with somebody. I think those are all the things. I don't know. I don't think you're a bitch, but like I just think that you have to be realistic that if someone had their was living life with somebody that they were that intertwined buying cars and have be on the same phone plan. That's like a real that's you can't just automatically s flip a button and like all those things just immediately you know untwine. Yeah. And that's what I'm that's what I meant. Like it would t it's gonna take some time. So whether that's like a sit down to be like, hey, like Yeah. You know, I think we should start figuring out like is there a conversation you have with her to be like, hey, or him to say, hey, go to her and be like, hey, we gotta start unwinding this stuff. I'm starting to build something with this person now. This new person. Not yeah, it's gonna take a minute, but like I don't think you're a bitch for asking for for that process to start if it hasn't started already. Yeah, they are they still fucking? You know, that's what you should be asking. Well she said she said ⁓ nothing romantic happening. Okay. Well you said every it said untangling everything was just complicated. We'll just double check. Ask again. Because niggas lie. Nah yeah. Yeah, we do be lying. What's the last lie you told, Go? Last lie that I told. I love you, Tyson. Probably tell somebody you low, don't you? No, I try my best not to really lie to people. That's tough when somebody tells you you low and you don't say it back. I don't think I've done that. I love you. You're like, not even you like having sex, it's just like, let me just whisper I love you just to see what it does. What it does to the situation. I don't think I'm gonna do that. No, just be like, just lie, but I love you. But see, that's what I'm saying. I'm not a good liar. I'm such a bad liar. ⁓ I'm a bad liar too, but I feel like that's something. And I'm also this is also my thing, is that like I'm so fucking grown right now. I don't what am I lying for? You ain't gonna beat my ass. What the fuck? I know, but just lie a little bit. Just to see. Just to see what happens. Like not it has to be a bad lie, but just be like, yeah. I'm not I'm not lying. What am I lie for? I'm not hungry. When you be hungry and sweet? Yeah. That's strange. That's no, cause that's not I'm not getting what I want. I'm wanna eat. No. No, I slept good last night. ⁓ yeah, I miss you. ⁓ yeah. I ha I'm trying to have I told somebody I missed him when I didn't miss them? No. No, I don't think I've done I have done a I miss you too. I have done a I'm miss you too. yeah, I like those pants. Yeah. Just start lying. You gotta start lying. I feel like the economy needs us to lie a little bit more just on some like I gotta get better at lying because start interviewing again so I gotta start beeping. ⁓ yeah, ⁓ yeah. If you look if you're looking for a job, lie. Lie. Lie your ass. The matter when look when I learned that people was lying to get jobs and I wasn't, I was like, I had no idea. What? I didn't think so. I didn't think it was the I didn't think it was the case. Luckily I my shit now is like all right, I don't have to really have to lie to But the way I know people when I found people was lying like bow face lying on their resume, I'm like, ⁓ you don't people actually don't check these things. And you can be the president of the United States if you just say you've, you know, understanding. At all these successful companies and Yeah, you understand foreign, you know, diplom diplomacy. It's like, ⁓ yeah, okay, sure. Sounds good to sound good to us. I'll take your word for it. Yeah. Anyways, let's let's close this motherfucker out. Toxic take time. Every episode we have our toxic takes at the end. These aren't necessarily toxic takes, these are just things that we don't want to say at the top of the episode. This week's toxic take, though, is a little bit toxic. You ever dated the short hair post? Break up shorty, that's a different kind of conversation. Like the short hair, like if if a shorty has a short hair and her a lot is a gap of pictures missing on Instagram, she died up she's just going through a breakup. Okay. She got the different, she got the different situation coming on. And like, ⁓ okay. What'd he do? How did he hurt? How bad did he hurt you? Yeah, ⁓ he did that to you. By the way, I like your haircut. But don't even bring it up. I like your haircut. I love your I love your is this new? Just palm it. Is this a new this a new palm it? Why you talking to like, yeah, that's crazy what he did that. Hey, why you do that? Why would you palm our head? ⁓ some like sensual shit. ⁓ On the back of it. Like I'm thinking y'all had like a burger joint. You're just like, I like your hair. How short is the cut though? Is it like a pixie cup or is it like a low fade? Either way, you still prominent, but sometimes it'd be the ball fade. When it's the ball fade, it's like they she really she broke up with him and she has an art exhibit next week. Yeah. Sometimes the little the little shorter joint like, okay, it's the the little They got a little got a little design on the on the head. That's sexy. Yeah, the the pixie look with the pixie cut's a different that's a differ it's different stages of like, ⁓ she broke up. The ball joint is like, yeah, I got she got two more other tattoos. And you know, she has ⁓ an exhibit coming up in couple of weeks. He's also a painter or a DJ. The short the short little corporate joint is like he was he was a finance bro. She didn't really want to be with him. But he convinced her he cheated. Mm. And now she just needed a a fresh start after coming back from Italy. Okay. After coming back from Italy. Yeah. I had to chop it all off. Okay. Yeah. Just the I gotta I gotta you know, she's doing pole dancing classes. I love the story. I do love the story that this is creating. Like this is Yeah. I feel like yeah, when they shortly start doing pole dancing classes, like she's doing she's on a different journey now. She getting flexible. Yeah. She getting strong. She's doing like aerial classes, pole dancing classes. She getting flexible. She's getting strong. Pottery. She's changing her life. Yeah, all that shit. She's changing her life. And I love that too. The shortcut. Take back your power, Bon. Take your take back your power, Ma. I love that shit. The shortcut with the pottery class and the in the in the pole dancing class. That nigga did something crazy. And and I and I kind of do I love that. I love that inward journey. And I I hate, I love that they're doing it. And in this scenario that you created, I hate that it's coming at you know from the from the from the pain that a nigga gave to you. But he's already moved on, which is crazy. Maybe it's fucked up. Maybe he has. Maybe he's never dealt with anything in his life. Yeah. He's probably you know what I mean? Like move on. Like has he ever dealt with anything to move on? You know what I Like that nigga probably ain't ever. And you're unpacking that. Yeah. Yeah. And you're unpacking it for yourself to be like, okay, what who am I? You're doing the work. Yeah, you doing the work, man. You can be some ooh, you can't. You downloaded you download a hinge for two weeks and like I'm not ready. I'm not doing no, I'm not ready. I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready for this. Now we're talking 'cause we met, you know, at the fucking bar. At the farmer's market. I'm not ready yet. You was squeezing the peaches. ⁓ okay, you you read fucking bell hooks and shit. And the nigga did the nigga did you dirty. Shout out to Bell Hooks. He reread Bell Hooks. All about love. You don't have anything toxic to say, do you? I don't. I already said my toxic take earlier, so also, never mind. What? I was gonna say something crazy, but it's more of a stage joke that I gotta figure out. Okay. But it is something about dating the holiday. Never I gotta say it. No, no, no, hell no. I can't say it. Okay. I can't say it. I cannot say it. Don't look at me like that. Fuck nigga. Okay. It's gonna be a it's gonna be a phenomenal joke though. I can't wait. I'm looking forward to it. Y'all did miss his show. It was a funny show. It was a it was it it was crazy. ⁓ people was like, ⁓ yeah, let me know when the next show is. Like also, my toxic take it. Stop jumping in my motherfucking DMs trying to ask me about this nigga. I'm so sick of that. I'm not if you're not jumping in my DMs to try and fuck me, leave me alone. Yeah, crack torrents. Yes. Let us crack. Let Torrance crack. Let me crack or crack me again. Yeah. Let him do his thing. But yeah, I'm Dick is Dick is pretty much closed. I've been saying this for a minute, but You did, you did say that. Dick is closed. The sign is up. Close dick. ⁓ it's been a phenomenal podcast. Yeah. I'm one of the funniest people ever to live and I love you so much for listening. That was I shouldn't have said that. That was actually to say things out 'cause you said something about me being funny and I just feel like I'm one the funniest people to to live. Yeah. I mean you're pretty funny, Daniel. I'll have to, you know. This has been great. I'm okay. I'm gonna go to the beach today. ⁓ that's so nice. I mean it's beach day. It's definitely It's the weather that we are we needed, we played for and it's time to be outside. Where's his day party at? Downtown. Is it thirty and up? Yeah. We gotta talk about this okay next week I'm I'm curious. We sure will. We'll see if I make out with a nigga in the club. Who I was going? You called Michael? Nina? ⁓ Nina there, I guess. There you go. And a couple other people I think are gonna pull up. Malcolm Gorner now. Yeah. Excellent. With you right now? Yeah. He's definitely. I should win with y'all niggas. Yeah, but you you best. ⁓ to make fun of I feel like I'm don't no, we're not doing that. No, I'm not I'm not gonna make I not some of him. I'm I was friends. No, I'm just saying in general, I feel like sometimes i I've seen some of these memes where like people go out and it'd be that one nigga talking Like in front of the girls, like remember that one time you was fucked up, bro. ⁓ yeah. And I had to save you. Yeah. That's actually what I'm too. Remember that one time you lost your job and you was fucking broke as hell. You stayed with me, I fed you, nigga. Remember that remember that time you was throwing up. You you remember that time you was throwing up on the on the bitches. You was throwing up on the bitches. You was throwing up on the bitches. Just saying shit that's like, what the fuck? And I nurtured you to health, nigga? He looked at the girls behind him like Yeah, you you you was you was hungry. It was raining outside. It was it was September 8th. Yeah, he threw up on the bitches. You gotta be careful with this one. This one. Yeah, he threw up wherever he threw up. He gets sick, he gets sick. Watch out. Your mother died. And I I paid for a funeral. Cause you ain't had nothing. ⁓ my God. Remember that one time? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your dog was sick. Remember that time when your car broke down? Yeah. And I and and you had nobody. And I came and I got you. I came and I picked you up. You were stuck on this on the highway scared. Yeah, scared. You called me. A C was out. Your AC was done. Triple A wasn't your Triple A wasn't acting. I got I got active Triple A. My Triple A active. So you called because you I had to act with Triple A. And I and I pulled your car with my hand my bare hands out the window. You know what I'm saying? On the freeway. You was in the car steering. Remember that? Yeah, nigga. I saved you. Yeah. Anyways, what y'all want to drink? With y'all with y'all ladies, what y'all ladies drinking? Y'all ain't hear that, did you? ⁓ my on my bad. I didn't even see y'all here. Damn, beautiful. Watch out, he liked to throw up. He likes to throw up. He can't hold his look at that. He can't hold his liquid. We're gonna give this nigga. Nah, we can't nah, he can't get nothing. He don't know how to hold his shit. He can't hold his shit. That's how I be. I pay for his last drink. Yeah. He can't even afford to be out here. I gave him a hundred dollars before we came in, so he didn't ⁓ he bought you a drink. That technically I bought you that drink. I bought you that drink. I bought you that drink 'cause I gave him the money to give it. At the strip club. Yeah, yeah. You know I pa I gave him that money. Yeah. That money he got, I gave him that shit. ⁓ you went to that with him? Yeah. I gave him a two. You went you went up there with him? I'm sure he had two hundred dollars to give, right. I gave him that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your mother. evil nigga. That's that would have been me today if I would have stepped outside. Well I'm glad that you're not because no one has time for that. You know I changed this fucking nigga's life, right? See, that's why. I do I do want to say that one day. I'm actually ⁓ this is my I think this is my my little last thing. I think I'm gonna do like somebody one of my co workers was like you should do one of the speed dating things. Please do not for the plot. ⁓ for the plot yeah for the plot. She's like ⁓ your dating show you should do a It's the speed dating thing and it's the the PowerPoint thing where they present your friend like at the bar or whatever. You know what I'm talking about? No, no shit. Where they ⁓ I'll I'll send it to you. I might have to do that for the for the for the sake of the fans. Yeah, do the yeah, do it for research because you're not gonna find somebody. No, I'm not ⁓ I'm not gonna find nobody on that ship, but I will have my camera on. I will have my microphone on, hidden. Yeah, that's insane. That's gonna be pretty nasty. Yeah, man. It's look, it's getting cold outside. Take these last couple these last month of warmness. And find you somebody. Yeah. Find Hug somebody just a little tighter. Spin the block on something. It's about to get cold, nigga. Delete the apps. Go outside twice a week. If you go outside twice a week and you just say, fuck it, I'm gonna if I see something, say something, you'll find somebody. I think so. And if not, I'm not leaving. I'm leaving here with something. That's me today. Yeah, actually, Chris. That was me. That was me till I thirteen on on UNC's campus. I'm leaving here with something. If you lived in the RDU Riley Durham area, the research triangle, and you were aka, that was that was my motto. We've been lingering. But yeah. But we like we got another good bit out of us. I think so. Yeah, I think so. This is part of the story. Yeah we love y'all so much. Thanks for listening, y'all. Bye. Peace.
ABOUT THIS EPISODE
WELP...WE HAVE ANOTHER EPISODE OF DATED!
Danny and Torrance get into some current events(slightly political..with Mitch McConnell and Ed Sheeran). But we get back to investigating love, and specifically touch on finding love after a tough break up.
Hosted by Danny Sellers and Torrance Winder
Follow Danny: Instagram/tiktok: @seesellers
Follow Dated on Instagram: @datedshow
English
United States
explicit content
TRANSCRIPT 🔗
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