ABOUT THIS EPISODE
What most people who walk into coach certification believe about themselves is wrong: they think they're already good listeners. Nathalie Blais and Kelly Wood, Coach Academy's lead facilitator, spend this episode taking that apart: the real difference between hearing and listening, why silence is one of the hardest skills for anyone to sit in, and the two-word question, "what else?", that can shift an entire conversation without adding a single opinion to it. They also get into what actually gets in the way of good listening (hint: it's usually relating other people's stories back to your own), a simple non-verbal mirroring exercise anyone can try this week, and why the "soft skills" label undersells what these tools actually do for trust and performance inside a team.
In this episode: 00:00 Intro and why coaching makes you a better leader · 03:32 Hearing vs. true listening · 07:15 What gets in the way of listening (relating) · 14:34 The power of asking "what else?" · 18:49 Why silence is so hard, and the 3-minute silence exercise · 31:10 The neuroscience of trust and the bottom line · 39:44 Asking "what do you already know?" instead of telling · 47:33 Reading non-verbal cues in a conversation
Ready to build listening skills like this into your own leadership? Learn more about Coach Academy's programs at coachacademy.com.
Connect with Kelly Wood: linkedin.com/in/kellyswood
FAQ
What's the difference between hearing and listening?
Hearing is passive, listening is a skill you have to build and keep sharpening. Nathalie Blais says most professionals assume they're good listeners simply because they can hear, without ever learning the specific behaviors, like withholding relating and sitting in silence, that separate real listening from just waiting for your turn to talk.
Why is silence important in a conversation?
Silence gives someone room to move past their surface-level answer into deeper reflection. Kelly Wood describes a coaching exercise where two people sit in three minutes of silence together, most find it uncomfortable at first, but it consistently produces insights that rapid-fire conversation never reaches.
What does asking "what else?" actually do in a conversation?
It signals genuine interest without adding your own opinion. Nathalie Blais says the question can deflate tension and push someone past their first, top-of-mind answer into something they hadn't quite articulated before, all without you saying anything about yourself.
How does coaching improve leadership and business outcomes?
Coaching skills build psychological safety, which research consistently links to team trust and performance. Kelly Wood and Nathalie Blais argue that leaders who ask questions instead of defaulting to advice uncover capability in their people they'd otherwise never see, and that trust inside a team has a measurable effect on the bottom line.
