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Welcome to Connecting with Super Kate.
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I am Super Kate, and I am joined today by my good friend Crispin Spaith.
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And I am just so grateful to have her here because she brings such a wealth of knowledge to the nervous system regulation that I speak to, to how we can connect with our bodies through all of the techniques that she has studied and taught over the years.
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And just her general groundedness and presence is a gift.
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So welcome, Crispin.
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Thank you so much for being here with us.
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Thank you so much for having me, Super Kate, the most super of supercates.
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Thanks.
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Thanks.
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I was, I just I feel it's so crazy how some of these events that we do as entrepreneurs, and you just you never know who you're gonna cross paths with.
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And we literally had, I think, one, we were in one meeting together and we connected, and it's been three or four years now.
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So awesome.
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Yeah.
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And Crispin is joining us from Seattle out there on the lovely West Coast.
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Oh, and I would love for you to share how like share a bit about you, honestly, and what you are passionate about sharing with the world.
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Oh, thank you.
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Um so I'll go outside the kind of canned canned response or the well-practiced response.
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I'll reach, I'll reach a little further for you today.
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And um, you know, I have always been a student of behavior and movement and how movement communicates what's happening on the inside, or or in some cases doesn't, which is also a tell, right?
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So um, and this has been since early childhood where you know there was a lot going on in the house, and I like had to kind of read the vibes and figure out what was happening.
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So um, and then I found a life in dance.
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I had a career as a contemporary dance choreographer, so I was taking these like big cultural ideas and moving that through um bodies into expression of those ideas and of themselves.
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Um, along the way, I discovered this thing called the Alexander Technique and started studying it almost almost 35 years ago now, and that's been a huge part of my life.
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Um, I became official with it in uh 2017, got certified and became a teacher.
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And that's really the foundation of everything that I do.
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Along the way, I've studied a zillion different things.
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Some of them are like great additions, and some of them I'm like, well, you know, Alexander Technique already does that.
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So I'll just I'll just they stay close to my home base.
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Fantastic.
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And was it through a dance class that you learned about Alexander Technique, or did you seek it out because of something?
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That it was accidental.
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I it was through I was working at a theater school.
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So part of how I got by as an artist in Seattle, where it was it was a for it was I could afford to live here, but I had a lot of side hustles, you know.
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Yeah.
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Um, and one of them was working in the theater school.
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And Alexander Technique is often taught in theater schools or to musicians for, you know, access to people's coordination.
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In acting, they think of it this new your body and your mind and your whole self as your instrument, right?
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So accessing all those things and bringing them together so that you can pretend to be someone else through your character, or in my case, in my uh life, be a more authentic person and notice when things are getting in my way.
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Um so that's where I found it was in a theater school, but the applications go way beyond performance.
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That's that's awesome.
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In in all of the theater that I was a part of, I mean, to be fair, the I was a theater major in in a University of Oregon for those up in the yeah, Northwest over there.
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I don't know all the things we've talked about.
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This was not one of them.
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I know.
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How is that possible?
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We do have some crossover, but not specifically like in the yeah, I wasn't a location, like I wasn't based in Seattle ever, but um, yeah, theater.
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Uh I knew I was a back, like a background backstage, you know, person, but I did the acting classes.
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But it the school, I at that school they were focused um more on uh I think it was Stanislavski acting.
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And um there wasn't that I can remember, to be fair, I wasn't in more advanced classes, but that I remember there weren't conversations or classes around how the body connects in all of it.
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But, you know, public school, so like who, you know, maybe that just wasn't a deep enough, you know, a deep enough program for that to be there at the time.
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I got into dance later in like my early 20s, but didn't hear about Alexander technique until a friend of mine who was teaching it down in Southern California brought a workshop over to Kentucky where I was at the time.
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And I was like, oh, this is interesting.
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This is a very slow practice, it felt like at the time, but the workshop that we did was really impactful.
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And I still use some of those today with like some of those exercises today for my own personal being, but it certainly was not the extent to which you have studied, because I never studied it, I just had a workshop.
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Right.
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I have always felt like I was a like connected to my body because I've done the sports and I've done the dance my entire life.
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And this was something else.
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Did you have that moment when you going from contemporary dance into the Alexander Technique where you sort of had like an eye-opening?
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Oh, this is a feeling I have not connected with before.
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It was really my first moments um uh in my first Alexander Technique class.
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And uh what I now could that have been just the energy of my teacher, it's possible.
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Um, but what I I chose to believe it was the process, which was why I was hooked very quickly.
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Um, and it didn't what what it felt like at the time was um like my whole body became awake in a way that it had been compartmentalized before.
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Now, in my dance training, so I I really envy the people who, when they were little people, had like jazz and tap and ballet.
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That was not what I had.
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I had uh Graham technique and Cunningham technique because I grew up pretty close to New York City.
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So we had modern, which I also love that I had, but I envy the tap dance really.
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Um me too.
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Yeah, and that'd be great.
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Always wanted to do it, couldn't figure it out.
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Just terrible.
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Yeah.
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Um side story.
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I once had my some of my dancers who were really good tap dancers, and we had these very abstract dances, and I had them like translated into tap.
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It was uh it was gorgeous, it was so cool, so fun.
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Oh I don't know if I do.
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I should look for that.
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Yeah, okay.
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That might be a little side quest of this of this episode.
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Cut to this particular dance contemporary dance, yeah.
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Yeah.
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But the so there there was no translation required really going from contemporary, you know, going from dancing to because it well, it really was a way for me to approach movement in a new way.
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So I could see more clearly what I what I had been choosing and what I wanted to choose in movement.
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Um, and I mean there was tons of practical reasons to do Alexander technique, like I didn't have to go to the chiropractor as much or the massage therapist, and you know, as a poor starving artist, those were like really big ticket items.
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Yeah.
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I didn't just didn't get it injured as much, and when I got injured, I could recover it more quickly.
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So yeah.
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Um, it was a real support to my the physicality of my life, and then also supported my communication and my creativity, like choosing what to think about.
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It's like, oh, I can direct my thoughts to really work this problem in a new way that before it was sort of I won't say innocent, but it was um only instinctual rather than instinctual and kind of having a strategy for how I was going to go about making something.
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So I don't know, it helped me.
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Can you can you give an example of a situation where that applies?
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So uh maybe I'll choose something more contemporaneous.
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So yeah.
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Combination of me and maybe a client.
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So this is kind of a semi, semi-fictional, semi-autobiographical situation.
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So let's say somebody is working on networking.
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Yeah.
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Right?
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So walking in, meeting new people, and you know, they feel like they just have to get past this nervous system thing by repeating it.
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I'm gonna go in, I'm gonna suffer through, and eventually I'll get used to it.
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Yeah.
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Sound familiar?
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Yeah, yeah.
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So, and yeah, practice does help a lot of things, but if what you're practicing is being scared while you're doing something, that being scared is gonna be part of it.
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Right.
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So when we practice something with more specific strategic intentions, like I'm gonna walk into a room knowing that I may or may not know people.
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I if I see someone I know, I'm going to go say hello to them.
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If I don't know anyone, I'm gonna introduce myself to three people, like really having this plan for myself that I've chosen.
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Yeah.
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And then I get to re-choose in the room, coordinating all the way toward it.
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And when I say coordinating, that's bringing your whole moving, thinking, communicating self into the room.
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That's like getting to that coordination part.
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That's the work that I do with people before they get there.
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Yeah.
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So there are some some tricks and tips to that.
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But is that a is that a good example of strategy for and I think that's a a good tie-in to really what started this conversation to begin with, because I you had posted on LinkedIn about showing up with the sort of the false sense, the performative sense of confidence and over puffing and leading with the chest.
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And I that is very much something that I feel like I spent probably the better part of my teens into my mid-20s doing both as a as a form of a wall to you know to block anybody from seeing the the the lack of self-esteem I had, but also I wanted to take up space.
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And I felt that was how I at least I was it was modeled to me that you take up space and people know who you are, and and clearly you're you know what you're talking about if you show up that way.
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So when you had this video about overpuffing, and I it just it really resonated with with past superkate because I once I began to notice I was doing that, and to be fair, a lot of that had to do with lower back pain that I was having.
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Eventually, I was like, oh, you were like staying out of your back.
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Yeah, my ribs have been flared for years.
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I I see, yeah, you know, and it's because I'm arching my low back, because I'm lifting up my chest and all of this stuff, and it it's it eventually like made me really pay attention to how I then ground myself when I'm recording a podcast or going to an online or in-person networking thing.
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Like, how am I showing up now?
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And how can that possibly be an even bigger energy than what I thought was attempting to put out at the time?
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So I would love for you to go through like what brought you to post about overpuffing, like what that means for everybody listening.
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I think that um one of the reasons people come to well, certainly back pain is a reason that somebody might come to me for having taken on this posture for so many years that puts a compromise in your lower back.
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Um, the other thing is is I'll call it authentic confidence.
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Like people want to feel like themselves, and there's some language around confidence that has to do that that does it just results in this this pose of taking up space that isn't actually taking up space, right?
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Yeah, so I can go like this.
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My mall, I'm not any larger of a person, and if you you know look here, um it's it just doesn't add up with confidence.
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Like if I'm really confident, can't my back be involved?
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Can't all of me can't I just show up as is and believe that I have the energy right now.
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Are there skills around growing and looking bigger for a second?
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Yeah, but I think as I said in the video, when I do that, you can kind of hear what's happening in my voice.
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It feels terrible from the inside.
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So the aesthetic of confidence is I don't know what the sources are, it's probably very um masculine, bro, you know, old masculinity shapes that people are trying to take up that um don't reflect what I'm interested in.
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Right.
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I think I mentioned to you in another conversation when I work with um a few older gay men that have come to me and they're performing masculinity in a way that they had to when they were little, and maybe you had to when you were 20 to be the badass pickup space person that you needed to be then, right?
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So yeah, out of necessity, we do these things, but it doesn't always match who you grow up to be, or once you reach safety, do you have to keep that performative armor on?
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Maybe not.
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So a lot of this work is like updating what's really required, what's necessary to help me express myself, keep me safe, do all the things.
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Yeah, amazing.
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And for those of you who are listening, uh Crispin was just sort of sharing that that the imagery she was lifting her chest, opening her arms a little bit out to the sides, that sort of gives that I'm presenting appearance, or I'm you know, a little bit of a superhero.
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Yeah, yeah.
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And oh, that leads me then to for a period of time, there was the whole superhero stance um that oh Amy said her name.
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Amy Cuddy.
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Yeah, that she brought out questions about the research behind it now.
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But I do know a lot of people who felt that that power pose of hands on the on the hips and lifting the chest and chin up was was helpful for them.
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So how um, and this kind of connects with a little bit of a thought I was having before we jumped on when in when I was in sports, we would have the the pregame huddle and that building of energy.
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And how do we navigate the moments of maybe we all puff up for a moment and then get into that settled grounded space?
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Do you I guess coming back to the power pose, do you feel that is a helpful thing to get the momentum going?
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Or is it really more of like, no, let's find the connection internally and maintain that because that is gonna that's gonna hold you longer than that adrenaline rush of the power pose.
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Um, you know, uh I know a lot of people love it.
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So I would never want to take away anyone's pre-performance ritual.
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Like anything you do to help you say, I'm transitioning now from daily life to this possibly extraordinary thing.
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I recognize that it's a challenge for me and I'm gonna do what I have to do.
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So that's my my first stop is if it works, you know, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
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Yeah, yeah.
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And building in a pre-performance uh ritual can help everybody because we do go into this elevated um chemistry.
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The chemistry changes, unless it's just like your everyday thing and you feel nothing, it's possible for maybe day actors on a on a soap opera.
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Maybe maybe they don't get that.
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But for most of us, getting on stage is not a daily activity, right?
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Right.
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Um, so there are other ways to think about that change in chemistry and to say yes to it rather than try to make it go away, or even um just really focus on what it is you're trying to do with the opportunity and or who it's for.
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So I don't even really talk about grounding because when people bring grounding into it, they often add a lot of pressure through their legs, the lower body.
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And here's another thing, and you can see what happens here.
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So, what I'm doing is I'm sort of pushing my pelvis forward a little bit to add energy to my legs, and this also impacts my breathing.
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I'm gonna run out of air in just a moment.
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So I'm often talking people out of grounding into connecting to your intention.
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Might be the same, it might just be a language thing, but connecting to um your intention, noticing all the aspects of your body, the stuff that's not touching your ground.
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I'm wiggling my fingers right now.
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The stuff that is touching the ground, I'm pointing to my feet.
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Um, so all of these are just different experiences of different aspects of my body that are in this particular relationship to gravity right now.
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So I'm really looking at the whole self as you meet the moment.
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Yeah.
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Oh, I love that.
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And I do talk about grounding, and I appreciate your perspective on the word.
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I do, and and the physicality of that.
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I have definitely found when my body wants to embody grounding, when I hear that word in my head and how that echoes through my body, I almost release my pelvis a little bit, soften my knees.
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But this I think is very uh connected to the dance that I because I spent so many years doing fusion dance with a lot of belly dance influence within that.
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So your hips had to be isolated in a sense from the the upper parts of your body.
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And so when I think grounding, my hips sort of release like a a bell on a string just drops down.
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Um but I also know that.
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That there is a heaviness that I don't want within that grounding.
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And so then I have to remind myself the grounding are the roots.
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You are still the tall oak or whatever tree I'm really resonating with in the moment.
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And so that sort of brings me back up into that connected hips are now back attached to my spine and not dangling below with with you know no connection to how the rest of my body is presenting.
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Right.
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But yeah, it words, they're just not enough words, and also at the same time there, because there's just so many words, and we all think of them differently.
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And yes, what an adventure.
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Language is it's wildly imprecise language to describe human experience.
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But I think this is a great, a great example of two interpretations of the same word.
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Our intention is the same, right?
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To yeah kind of let gravity do its job and respond with that um life-filled energy that's in this current gravitational circumstance, right?
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Right.
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Probably in similar circumstances right now.
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Yeah.
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And and yeah, if I see somebody over like that, we we talked about the overpuffing, then there's some people who are like extra up.
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I'm kind of standing on my toes a little bit, kind of like, oh, I'm it almost like you can imagine a kid at Christmas being easily anticipating something, right?
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People who bring their show their excitement in that way, that's where I'm like, okay, let gravity have its way with you.
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Because this energy is um not sustainable, and maybe an audience wouldn't love it if we're working on a public speaking thing.
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Right, right, exactly.
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Oh, I mean, I have definitely even just in this is a call to one of your other videos that you posted.
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Um even just on everything virtual.
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If you're sitting down, that leaning forward is almost the same thing as being up on your toes that you were just talking about, but you have this video about leaning forward towards whoever is talking.
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I have done that so much of my life.
00:24:26.079 --> 00:24:37.920
And I I'm I think I can attribute it now to like really making them know that I'm listening, but also making sure I'm really listening.
00:24:38.079 --> 00:24:38.240
Right.
00:24:38.640 --> 00:24:47.200
And being able to relax or just sit upright and not leaning forward.
00:24:47.920 --> 00:25:00.960
There is a visual difference that the person speaking is gonna have when they see you either leaning towards the mic more and towards the camera more, and really I really hear you.
00:25:01.279 --> 00:25:29.279
Yeah, really getting in there versus I no, I'm I'm here in this space and I can hold you still or have the conversation make the presentation, but I don't need to force anything on you or expect you to handle the energy that's coming at you because even visually on a Zoom call, there is a huge difference.
00:25:30.079 --> 00:25:30.720
Right.
00:25:31.599 --> 00:25:36.480
And how does it feel from you to you from the inside to do that differently?
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:45.680
It took some getting used to, and I still find my I it's my my instinct is to lean forward.
00:25:46.000 --> 00:25:48.000
Um yeah, we want to be close to people.
00:25:48.160 --> 00:25:49.599
That's the good instinct, right?
00:25:49.759 --> 00:25:51.839
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
00:25:52.240 --> 00:26:22.640
And when I I've actually had to sometimes force myself to lean all the way back just to counter it, just say no, you are like step back, they can still hear you, you can still hear them, relax, and then I come back to a neutral position, and it feels safer, it feels I'm I don't think I am denying them anything.
00:26:22.960 --> 00:26:28.240
But yeah, I still really want to jump through that screen and give everybody a big hug.
00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:30.480
Like it's yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:26:30.799 --> 00:26:51.359
I think some of some of the the you know, the the the um posts that you're talking about are things where like I probably was talking more about about public speaking or just about, you know, when you're on a call, you want to make sure somebody gets that you're listening and understanding, so there's extra signaling because we're not in the same room.
00:26:51.599 --> 00:26:51.920
Yeah.
00:26:52.079 --> 00:26:58.559
Um what's what's really behind that for me is the function of me when I'm doing it.
00:26:58.640 --> 00:27:04.079
Like if I'm out here, well, a bunch of stuff is getting compromised in my system.
00:27:04.319 --> 00:27:06.960
Whereas here, I can go anywhere, do anything.
00:27:07.119 --> 00:27:15.519
And my expression, you know, I can jump forward and be more like signal more excitement than I can if I'm already there, right?
00:27:15.599 --> 00:27:17.440
Then I then there's nowhere to go.
00:27:17.839 --> 00:27:18.720
Right, right.
00:27:18.960 --> 00:27:24.480
It's that same place that a lot of martial artists like the the sort of neutral stance that martial artists come from.
00:27:24.640 --> 00:27:29.599
Like you can redirect the energy if you were standing new, whatever their neutral is.
00:27:29.839 --> 00:27:36.480
I'm just imagining Bruce Lee just standing as if he's doing nothing at all.
00:27:36.559 --> 00:27:40.240
And then somebody comes up and he's like, does whatever he does.
00:27:40.319 --> 00:27:42.480
And yes, like, where did that come from?
00:27:42.640 --> 00:27:45.440
It's because he knew where he was at the time.
00:27:45.680 --> 00:27:46.559
Yeah, yeah.
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:47.359
Yeah.
00:27:47.680 --> 00:27:48.720
And you talk a lot.
00:27:49.039 --> 00:28:03.599
You know, kind of technically, if your muscles are already on to hold you in this in a position, so if he was already in some kind of I'm I'm not gonna imitate person here, but if he was already in some extreme position, right, his muscles are busy holding that extreme position.
00:28:03.680 --> 00:28:10.160
He has to get out of that before doing something else instead of just moving to the appropriate response.
00:28:10.480 --> 00:28:11.440
Yeah, yeah.
00:28:11.680 --> 00:28:26.720
And that's yeah, the the responding versus the reacting, and and and I feel like if you're many of us have been in that constant reaction mode with dysregulated nervous systems.
00:28:26.960 --> 00:28:56.640
And so pulling back and allowing that response is such a hard transition, but such a huh, such a magnificent one to be able to understand and start shifting your life towards so that you can have the space, the time, the energy to do what needs to be done, as opposed to you're already in one place pulling back and then moving in a different direction.
00:28:57.119 --> 00:29:01.519
Um because you're starting then from yeah, like the negative place.
00:29:02.960 --> 00:29:05.680
If you're trying to do something differently.
00:29:05.920 --> 00:29:07.119
Um Right.
00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:07.839
Yeah.
00:29:08.160 --> 00:29:09.759
Or like an activated place.
00:29:09.839 --> 00:29:14.480
You're already your energy is already headed one direction, you have to kind of retract it.
00:29:14.799 --> 00:29:15.039
Yeah.
00:29:15.200 --> 00:29:15.359
Yeah.
00:29:15.440 --> 00:29:18.559
It kind of makes me think of like you said react and respond.
00:29:18.640 --> 00:29:26.000
It kind of makes me think of um lost my train of thought.
00:29:26.160 --> 00:29:27.119
There you go.
00:29:29.200 --> 00:29:31.279
Kind of makes me think of nothing, apparently.
00:29:35.599 --> 00:29:43.359
Oh, well, that I hopefully it'll it'll come back around and we'll tie back in.
00:29:43.440 --> 00:29:53.839
But it this also leads, you just posted today about um a new offer that you have called um uh on air ease.
00:29:54.720 --> 00:30:14.000
And oh that was, I was I could, I was like, this is exact, yes, yes, this is another wonderful extension of what you bring to the table with your knowledge and supporting people both speaking virtually and in person.
00:30:14.400 --> 00:30:18.160
I just I thought it was a great entitle.
00:30:18.400 --> 00:30:19.680
Love it, love it.
00:30:20.240 --> 00:30:25.279
So, yeah, can you speak to tell everybody what on air ease is?
00:30:25.519 --> 00:30:29.039
So on air ease is a is a really it's kind of a mini offer.
00:30:29.119 --> 00:30:32.960
It's um one private coaching session plus one group lab.
00:30:33.119 --> 00:30:57.119
So in the private coaching session, we would look at what's the thing that right now you're really curious about or that's getting in your way or showing up, whether it's on podcasts, on stage, on reels, whatever it is, my um, you know, my not so hidden agenda is economic empowerment for marginalized people.
00:30:57.279 --> 00:31:01.440
So yes, uh women, weirdos and queerdos are kind of my people.
00:31:01.759 --> 00:31:19.920
Um so I want to make sure that if there's an obstacle that and if the obstacle is your nervous system, you running out of breath, you feeling, you you translating, that you feeling like being an introvert and being on camera don't go together.
00:31:20.079 --> 00:31:38.000
Any any of those messages or internal feelings that might get in the way of you showing up in a way that's going to support your business, you're making money, you're getting that next um job, whatever it is that's that could impact your personal performance.
00:31:38.400 --> 00:31:43.920
And anyway, so yeah, so this would just be a little mini sample to say, like, okay, what's one thing that's affecting you?
00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:45.440
Let's see if we can sort it out.
00:31:45.599 --> 00:31:48.480
And then in the group class, you could put it into action.
00:31:48.720 --> 00:31:57.039
So if you were doing public speaking, or if you were just wanting to meet people, you could kind of role play that or practice that in a group.
00:31:57.119 --> 00:32:02.720
So much of the stimulus that we get that gets in our way is because of social stuff, right?
00:32:03.039 --> 00:32:03.359
Yeah.
00:32:03.599 --> 00:32:11.920
So actually practicing this um coordination around people is a very helpful tool.
00:32:12.400 --> 00:32:13.039
Yeah.
00:32:13.359 --> 00:32:18.480
And is the is the group lab in-person, virtual?
00:32:18.720 --> 00:32:21.039
How does it there are two versions?
00:32:21.119 --> 00:32:25.599
So I do one in person here in Seattle, and then I also do online labs.
00:32:25.839 --> 00:32:29.200
Um, one of those is on Wednesday afternoons, one's on Thursday morning.
00:32:29.359 --> 00:32:38.160
So kind of um added some new possibilities for people so I can work with more people across the country and around the globe.
00:32:38.960 --> 00:32:41.839
Yay! Yeah, oh my goodness.
00:32:42.480 --> 00:32:58.880
This great offer, the opportunities to do it in having the chance to go through something privately, but then put it into practice in such a safe environment is really helpful.
00:32:59.200 --> 00:33:21.680
And I I find that some of the people that I've come across think that it's just a matter of pushing through and doing something, it's a matter of having the right mindset, it's just nailing that one viral video or whatever, and then they'll be fine.
00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:47.759
And this is what you're offering is to get through a little bit of that initial chaos, that hesitancy, but ultimately you're gonna be giving them tools that are going to really just extend their ability to show up more connected internally so they can be more connected externally.
00:33:47.920 --> 00:33:49.599
And yeah, there you go.
00:33:49.759 --> 00:33:51.359
Yeah, ding, ding, ding.
00:33:52.960 --> 00:33:56.960
Yeah, it's more connected so you can be more connected.
00:33:57.200 --> 00:33:57.839
Yeah.
00:33:59.359 --> 00:34:03.039
Oh well, this has been such a lovely conversation.
00:34:03.279 --> 00:34:06.559
Oh my goodness, I'm so grateful to have you here.
00:34:07.119 --> 00:34:11.440
Uh and just in time, a cat is busting through the door.
00:34:11.679 --> 00:34:15.599
Uh I we'll see if she gets through.
00:34:15.840 --> 00:34:28.400
Um, I would like to know what is one thing that you are grateful for in your body today.
00:34:30.000 --> 00:34:35.199
In my body today, I was thinking about it earlier, so I I do have an answer.
00:34:35.440 --> 00:34:42.880
In my body today, I'm grateful that even at the ripe old age at 58, I'm still getting stronger.
00:34:43.119 --> 00:34:46.800
So that's uh I'm grateful for that.
00:34:47.519 --> 00:34:48.400
Excellent.
00:34:48.559 --> 00:34:49.360
I love that.
00:34:49.840 --> 00:34:51.360
Yeah, strength.
00:34:52.639 --> 00:34:55.039
Um, I am grateful.
00:34:55.920 --> 00:35:08.320
I'm grateful that there are many things that I can do still physically that I used to be able to do much better even five years ago.
00:35:09.199 --> 00:35:13.760
But that my body feels ready to come back to those things again.
00:35:15.039 --> 00:35:15.679
Yeah.
00:35:17.280 --> 00:35:17.920
Yeah.
00:35:18.559 --> 00:35:27.039
Been doing more dancing recently, and it is in certain ways felt challenging, but my body says, I remember.
00:35:27.599 --> 00:35:29.840
You just have to give me a little more time.
00:35:30.480 --> 00:35:47.840
And yeah, but I appreciate that it still remembers because mentally I remember, but like, right, yeah, when that that distance that we we think never happened, like, oh, I could do a cartwell when I was six, of course I can do it now when I'm 48.
00:35:48.079 --> 00:35:50.159
Like, how would that have changed?
00:35:50.480 --> 00:35:53.440
It changes, yeah, it changed.
00:35:55.599 --> 00:35:56.000
Yeah.
00:35:56.239 --> 00:35:59.840
So yes, yeah, I'm learning more about what changes.
00:36:00.559 --> 00:36:01.039
Yeah.
00:36:01.280 --> 00:36:01.840
Yeah.
00:36:02.159 --> 00:36:03.039
What falls away.
00:36:03.199 --> 00:36:05.440
And there are some things that fall away, and that's okay.
00:36:05.840 --> 00:36:06.079
Yeah.
00:36:06.320 --> 00:36:07.519
We don't need all of it.
00:36:07.840 --> 00:36:08.880
No, no.
00:36:09.840 --> 00:36:11.679
And there's other things that we gained.
00:36:11.760 --> 00:36:24.320
I mean, there may not be quite this quite the same thing, but man, to just to to have the ability, the the opportunity to continue learning.
00:36:24.480 --> 00:36:28.159
Like, what a what an awesome thing.
00:36:29.679 --> 00:36:30.159
Huh.
00:36:31.199 --> 00:36:31.920
Yeah.
00:36:32.880 --> 00:36:36.719
Well, I want to thank you again for being here.
00:36:37.119 --> 00:36:38.079
So appreciate you.
00:36:38.320 --> 00:36:39.199
Thank you for having me.
00:36:40.159 --> 00:36:42.639
And thank you all for listening.
00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:50.559
Um, I'm gonna put all of well, where's the best place that they can find more information, connect with you?
00:36:51.440 --> 00:36:56.480
There's my website, Chrispenspaith.com, or if you're a LinkedIn person, I'm also there.
00:36:56.639 --> 00:37:02.559
My name is impossible to spell, so I would defer to SuperKate to spell it out for you.
00:37:02.800 --> 00:37:04.159
Yeah, it'll be in the show notes.
00:37:04.320 --> 00:37:06.480
All the connections will be in the show notes.
00:37:08.480 --> 00:37:09.840
Um, excellent.
00:37:10.239 --> 00:37:17.599
Well, I'm grateful to connect with you today, and I look forward to doing more in the future.
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:18.639
Yeah, yeah.
00:37:19.199 --> 00:37:20.079
Sure, I'll see you.
00:37:20.320 --> 00:37:20.559
Yes.
00:37:22.960 --> 00:37:24.320
All right, thank you, everyone.
00:00:03.680 --> 00:00:05.679
Welcome to Connecting with Super Kate.
00:00:05.759 --> 00:00:11.359
I am Super Kate, and I am joined today by my good friend Crispin Spaith.
00:00:11.759 --> 00:00:30.000
And I am just so grateful to have her here because she brings such a wealth of knowledge to the nervous system regulation that I speak to, to how we can connect with our bodies through all of the techniques that she has studied and taught over the years.
00:00:30.239 --> 00:00:38.240
And just her general groundedness and presence is a gift.
00:00:38.719 --> 00:00:41.359
So welcome, Crispin.
00:00:41.679 --> 00:00:43.679
Thank you so much for being here with us.
00:00:44.159 --> 00:00:48.240
Thank you so much for having me, Super Kate, the most super of supercates.
00:00:48.560 --> 00:00:49.039
Thanks.
00:00:49.280 --> 00:00:50.079
Thanks.
00:00:50.479 --> 00:01:00.479
I was, I just I feel it's so crazy how some of these events that we do as entrepreneurs, and you just you never know who you're gonna cross paths with.
00:01:00.560 --> 00:01:08.959
And we literally had, I think, one, we were in one meeting together and we connected, and it's been three or four years now.
00:01:09.920 --> 00:01:10.719
So awesome.
00:01:11.439 --> 00:01:12.079
Yeah.
00:01:12.560 --> 00:01:18.879
And Crispin is joining us from Seattle out there on the lovely West Coast.
00:01:19.120 --> 00:01:30.159
Oh, and I would love for you to share how like share a bit about you, honestly, and what you are passionate about sharing with the world.
00:01:30.640 --> 00:01:31.760
Oh, thank you.
00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:38.079
Um so I'll go outside the kind of canned canned response or the well-practiced response.
00:01:38.159 --> 00:01:40.560
I'll reach, I'll reach a little further for you today.
00:01:41.439 --> 00:01:59.439
And um, you know, I have always been a student of behavior and movement and how movement communicates what's happening on the inside, or or in some cases doesn't, which is also a tell, right?
00:01:59.599 --> 00:02:10.159
So um, and this has been since early childhood where you know there was a lot going on in the house, and I like had to kind of read the vibes and figure out what was happening.
00:02:10.560 --> 00:02:13.759
So um, and then I found a life in dance.
00:02:13.840 --> 00:02:28.080
I had a career as a contemporary dance choreographer, so I was taking these like big cultural ideas and moving that through um bodies into expression of those ideas and of themselves.
00:02:28.319 --> 00:02:40.080
Um, along the way, I discovered this thing called the Alexander Technique and started studying it almost almost 35 years ago now, and that's been a huge part of my life.
00:02:40.319 --> 00:02:46.240
Um, I became official with it in uh 2017, got certified and became a teacher.
00:02:46.400 --> 00:02:50.080
And that's really the foundation of everything that I do.
00:02:50.400 --> 00:02:53.599
Along the way, I've studied a zillion different things.
00:02:53.840 --> 00:02:58.800
Some of them are like great additions, and some of them I'm like, well, you know, Alexander Technique already does that.
00:02:58.960 --> 00:03:03.439
So I'll just I'll just they stay close to my home base.
00:03:04.719 --> 00:03:05.759
Fantastic.
00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:14.560
And was it through a dance class that you learned about Alexander Technique, or did you seek it out because of something?
00:03:14.960 --> 00:03:16.240
That it was accidental.
00:03:16.400 --> 00:03:19.360
I it was through I was working at a theater school.
00:03:19.599 --> 00:03:29.120
So part of how I got by as an artist in Seattle, where it was it was a for it was I could afford to live here, but I had a lot of side hustles, you know.
00:03:29.360 --> 00:03:29.599
Yeah.
00:03:29.759 --> 00:03:32.240
Um, and one of them was working in the theater school.
00:03:32.400 --> 00:03:41.680
And Alexander Technique is often taught in theater schools or to musicians for, you know, access to people's coordination.
00:03:44.240 --> 00:03:49.120
In acting, they think of it this new your body and your mind and your whole self as your instrument, right?
00:03:49.280 --> 00:04:06.159
So accessing all those things and bringing them together so that you can pretend to be someone else through your character, or in my case, in my uh life, be a more authentic person and notice when things are getting in my way.
00:04:06.319 --> 00:04:12.479
Um so that's where I found it was in a theater school, but the applications go way beyond performance.
00:04:13.039 --> 00:04:14.479
That's that's awesome.
00:04:14.639 --> 00:04:27.279
In in all of the theater that I was a part of, I mean, to be fair, the I was a theater major in in a University of Oregon for those up in the yeah, Northwest over there.
00:04:29.040 --> 00:04:30.560
I don't know all the things we've talked about.
00:04:30.639 --> 00:04:32.000
This was not one of them.
00:04:32.319 --> 00:04:32.720
I know.
00:04:32.879 --> 00:04:34.000
How is that possible?
00:04:34.240 --> 00:04:44.560
We do have some crossover, but not specifically like in the yeah, I wasn't a location, like I wasn't based in Seattle ever, but um, yeah, theater.
00:04:44.720 --> 00:04:52.480
Uh I knew I was a back, like a background backstage, you know, person, but I did the acting classes.
00:04:52.560 --> 00:05:02.800
But it the school, I at that school they were focused um more on uh I think it was Stanislavski acting.
00:05:03.199 --> 00:05:18.000
And um there wasn't that I can remember, to be fair, I wasn't in more advanced classes, but that I remember there weren't conversations or classes around how the body connects in all of it.
00:05:18.720 --> 00:05:29.519
But, you know, public school, so like who, you know, maybe that just wasn't a deep enough, you know, a deep enough program for that to be there at the time.
00:05:30.079 --> 00:05:46.000
I got into dance later in like my early 20s, but didn't hear about Alexander technique until a friend of mine who was teaching it down in Southern California brought a workshop over to Kentucky where I was at the time.
00:05:46.079 --> 00:05:48.399
And I was like, oh, this is interesting.
00:05:48.720 --> 00:05:56.879
This is a very slow practice, it felt like at the time, but the workshop that we did was really impactful.
00:05:57.120 --> 00:06:12.720
And I still use some of those today with like some of those exercises today for my own personal being, but it certainly was not the extent to which you have studied, because I never studied it, I just had a workshop.
00:06:12.879 --> 00:06:13.439
Right.
00:06:13.839 --> 00:06:22.879
I have always felt like I was a like connected to my body because I've done the sports and I've done the dance my entire life.
00:06:23.199 --> 00:06:26.560
And this was something else.
00:06:26.800 --> 00:06:37.360
Did you have that moment when you going from contemporary dance into the Alexander Technique where you sort of had like an eye-opening?
00:06:38.079 --> 00:06:43.759
Oh, this is a feeling I have not connected with before.
00:06:44.079 --> 00:06:50.079
It was really my first moments um uh in my first Alexander Technique class.
00:06:50.800 --> 00:06:57.120
And uh what I now could that have been just the energy of my teacher, it's possible.
00:06:57.360 --> 00:07:04.160
Um, but what I I chose to believe it was the process, which was why I was hooked very quickly.
00:07:04.399 --> 00:07:18.879
Um, and it didn't what what it felt like at the time was um like my whole body became awake in a way that it had been compartmentalized before.
00:07:19.199 --> 00:07:27.439
Now, in my dance training, so I I really envy the people who, when they were little people, had like jazz and tap and ballet.
00:07:27.519 --> 00:07:29.120
That was not what I had.
00:07:29.199 --> 00:07:34.959
I had uh Graham technique and Cunningham technique because I grew up pretty close to New York City.
00:07:35.199 --> 00:07:41.120
So we had modern, which I also love that I had, but I envy the tap dance really.
00:07:41.680 --> 00:07:42.959
Um me too.
00:07:43.199 --> 00:07:44.480
Yeah, and that'd be great.
00:07:44.720 --> 00:07:46.560
Always wanted to do it, couldn't figure it out.
00:07:46.720 --> 00:07:47.519
Just terrible.
00:07:47.600 --> 00:07:48.240
Yeah.
00:07:49.680 --> 00:07:51.920
Um side story.
00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:59.199
I once had my some of my dancers who were really good tap dancers, and we had these very abstract dances, and I had them like translated into tap.
00:08:00.240 --> 00:08:04.079
It was uh it was gorgeous, it was so cool, so fun.
00:08:04.560 --> 00:08:09.040
Oh I don't know if I do.
00:08:09.199 --> 00:08:10.160
I should look for that.
00:08:10.720 --> 00:08:11.600
Yeah, okay.
00:08:11.759 --> 00:08:15.920
That might be a little side quest of this of this episode.
00:08:16.160 --> 00:08:21.920
Cut to this particular dance contemporary dance, yeah.
00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:22.639
Yeah.
00:08:23.680 --> 00:08:35.360
But the so there there was no translation required really going from contemporary, you know, going from dancing to because it well, it really was a way for me to approach movement in a new way.
00:08:35.440 --> 00:08:41.600
So I could see more clearly what I what I had been choosing and what I wanted to choose in movement.
00:08:42.159 --> 00:08:55.440
Um, and I mean there was tons of practical reasons to do Alexander technique, like I didn't have to go to the chiropractor as much or the massage therapist, and you know, as a poor starving artist, those were like really big ticket items.
00:08:55.679 --> 00:08:56.000
Yeah.
00:08:56.159 --> 00:09:00.559
I didn't just didn't get it injured as much, and when I got injured, I could recover it more quickly.
00:09:00.799 --> 00:09:02.000
So yeah.
00:09:02.399 --> 00:09:15.440
Um, it was a real support to my the physicality of my life, and then also supported my communication and my creativity, like choosing what to think about.
00:09:15.679 --> 00:09:36.639
It's like, oh, I can direct my thoughts to really work this problem in a new way that before it was sort of I won't say innocent, but it was um only instinctual rather than instinctual and kind of having a strategy for how I was going to go about making something.
00:09:36.960 --> 00:09:39.600
So I don't know, it helped me.
00:09:40.159 --> 00:09:44.320
Can you can you give an example of a situation where that applies?
00:09:45.279 --> 00:09:49.840
So uh maybe I'll choose something more contemporaneous.
00:09:50.000 --> 00:09:51.120
So yeah.
00:09:52.000 --> 00:09:54.240
Combination of me and maybe a client.
00:09:54.320 --> 00:09:58.639
So this is kind of a semi, semi-fictional, semi-autobiographical situation.
00:09:58.799 --> 00:10:02.799
So let's say somebody is working on networking.
00:10:03.039 --> 00:10:03.360
Yeah.
00:10:03.519 --> 00:10:03.759
Right?
00:10:03.840 --> 00:10:13.120
So walking in, meeting new people, and you know, they feel like they just have to get past this nervous system thing by repeating it.
00:10:13.279 --> 00:10:18.159
I'm gonna go in, I'm gonna suffer through, and eventually I'll get used to it.
00:10:18.480 --> 00:10:18.960
Yeah.
00:10:19.279 --> 00:10:20.240
Sound familiar?
00:10:20.799 --> 00:10:21.840
Yeah, yeah.
00:10:22.080 --> 00:10:32.879
So, and yeah, practice does help a lot of things, but if what you're practicing is being scared while you're doing something, that being scared is gonna be part of it.
00:10:33.360 --> 00:10:33.679
Right.
00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:47.759
So when we practice something with more specific strategic intentions, like I'm gonna walk into a room knowing that I may or may not know people.
00:10:48.240 --> 00:10:52.000
I if I see someone I know, I'm going to go say hello to them.
00:10:52.159 --> 00:11:01.200
If I don't know anyone, I'm gonna introduce myself to three people, like really having this plan for myself that I've chosen.
00:11:01.519 --> 00:11:01.840
Yeah.
00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:07.840
And then I get to re-choose in the room, coordinating all the way toward it.
00:11:07.919 --> 00:11:14.559
And when I say coordinating, that's bringing your whole moving, thinking, communicating self into the room.
00:11:14.879 --> 00:11:17.039
That's like getting to that coordination part.
00:11:17.200 --> 00:11:20.559
That's the work that I do with people before they get there.
00:11:20.879 --> 00:11:21.360
Yeah.
00:11:21.519 --> 00:11:23.840
So there are some some tricks and tips to that.
00:11:24.000 --> 00:11:50.000
But is that a is that a good example of strategy for and I think that's a a good tie-in to really what started this conversation to begin with, because I you had posted on LinkedIn about showing up with the sort of the false sense, the performative sense of confidence and over puffing and leading with the chest.
00:11:50.320 --> 00:12:22.879
And I that is very much something that I feel like I spent probably the better part of my teens into my mid-20s doing both as a as a form of a wall to you know to block anybody from seeing the the the lack of self-esteem I had, but also I wanted to take up space.
00:12:23.039 --> 00:12:38.720
And I felt that was how I at least I was it was modeled to me that you take up space and people know who you are, and and clearly you're you know what you're talking about if you show up that way.
00:12:38.960 --> 00:12:56.000
So when you had this video about overpuffing, and I it just it really resonated with with past superkate because I once I began to notice I was doing that, and to be fair, a lot of that had to do with lower back pain that I was having.
00:12:56.480 --> 00:12:59.759
Eventually, I was like, oh, you were like staying out of your back.
00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:02.399
Yeah, my ribs have been flared for years.
00:13:02.639 --> 00:13:28.559
I I see, yeah, you know, and it's because I'm arching my low back, because I'm lifting up my chest and all of this stuff, and it it's it eventually like made me really pay attention to how I then ground myself when I'm recording a podcast or going to an online or in-person networking thing.
00:13:28.639 --> 00:13:31.360
Like, how am I showing up now?
00:13:31.600 --> 00:13:40.879
And how can that possibly be an even bigger energy than what I thought was attempting to put out at the time?
00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:52.320
So I would love for you to go through like what brought you to post about overpuffing, like what that means for everybody listening.
00:13:53.039 --> 00:14:06.799
I think that um one of the reasons people come to well, certainly back pain is a reason that somebody might come to me for having taken on this posture for so many years that puts a compromise in your lower back.
00:14:07.279 --> 00:14:12.000
Um, the other thing is is I'll call it authentic confidence.
00:14:12.080 --> 00:14:29.840
Like people want to feel like themselves, and there's some language around confidence that has to do that that does it just results in this this pose of taking up space that isn't actually taking up space, right?
00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:31.360
Yeah, so I can go like this.
00:14:31.519 --> 00:14:40.960
My mall, I'm not any larger of a person, and if you you know look here, um it's it just doesn't add up with confidence.
00:14:41.120 --> 00:14:44.240
Like if I'm really confident, can't my back be involved?
00:14:44.399 --> 00:14:52.879
Can't all of me can't I just show up as is and believe that I have the energy right now.
00:14:53.120 --> 00:14:58.559
Are there skills around growing and looking bigger for a second?
00:14:58.720 --> 00:15:05.840
Yeah, but I think as I said in the video, when I do that, you can kind of hear what's happening in my voice.
00:15:05.919 --> 00:15:08.159
It feels terrible from the inside.
00:15:08.799 --> 00:15:28.559
So the aesthetic of confidence is I don't know what the sources are, it's probably very um masculine, bro, you know, old masculinity shapes that people are trying to take up that um don't reflect what I'm interested in.
00:15:29.039 --> 00:15:29.360
Right.
00:15:29.600 --> 00:15:51.840
I think I mentioned to you in another conversation when I work with um a few older gay men that have come to me and they're performing masculinity in a way that they had to when they were little, and maybe you had to when you were 20 to be the badass pickup space person that you needed to be then, right?
00:15:52.000 --> 00:16:04.879
So yeah, out of necessity, we do these things, but it doesn't always match who you grow up to be, or once you reach safety, do you have to keep that performative armor on?
00:16:05.279 --> 00:16:06.080
Maybe not.
00:16:06.240 --> 00:16:15.360
So a lot of this work is like updating what's really required, what's necessary to help me express myself, keep me safe, do all the things.
00:16:15.679 --> 00:16:17.600
Yeah, amazing.
00:16:17.840 --> 00:16:37.440
And for those of you who are listening, uh Crispin was just sort of sharing that that the imagery she was lifting her chest, opening her arms a little bit out to the sides, that sort of gives that I'm presenting appearance, or I'm you know, a little bit of a superhero.
00:16:37.840 --> 00:16:39.120
Yeah, yeah.
00:16:39.919 --> 00:16:54.159
And oh, that leads me then to for a period of time, there was the whole superhero stance um that oh Amy said her name.
00:16:54.399 --> 00:16:55.039
Amy Cuddy.
00:16:55.440 --> 00:17:01.360
Yeah, that she brought out questions about the research behind it now.
00:17:01.600 --> 00:17:16.880
But I do know a lot of people who felt that that power pose of hands on the on the hips and lifting the chest and chin up was was helpful for them.
00:17:17.279 --> 00:17:35.519
So how um, and this kind of connects with a little bit of a thought I was having before we jumped on when in when I was in sports, we would have the the pregame huddle and that building of energy.
00:17:35.680 --> 00:17:50.319
And how do we navigate the moments of maybe we all puff up for a moment and then get into that settled grounded space?
00:17:51.279 --> 00:18:03.839
Do you I guess coming back to the power pose, do you feel that is a helpful thing to get the momentum going?
00:18:04.720 --> 00:18:22.480
Or is it really more of like, no, let's find the connection internally and maintain that because that is gonna that's gonna hold you longer than that adrenaline rush of the power pose.
00:18:24.079 --> 00:18:28.880
Um, you know, uh I know a lot of people love it.
00:18:28.960 --> 00:18:33.200
So I would never want to take away anyone's pre-performance ritual.
00:18:33.599 --> 00:18:42.559
Like anything you do to help you say, I'm transitioning now from daily life to this possibly extraordinary thing.
00:18:42.720 --> 00:18:46.720
I recognize that it's a challenge for me and I'm gonna do what I have to do.
00:18:47.279 --> 00:18:52.480
So that's my my first stop is if it works, you know, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
00:18:52.720 --> 00:18:53.279
Yeah, yeah.
00:18:54.240 --> 00:19:06.240
And building in a pre-performance uh ritual can help everybody because we do go into this elevated um chemistry.
00:19:06.480 --> 00:19:14.960
The chemistry changes, unless it's just like your everyday thing and you feel nothing, it's possible for maybe day actors on a on a soap opera.
00:19:15.039 --> 00:19:16.640
Maybe maybe they don't get that.
00:19:16.960 --> 00:19:22.559
But for most of us, getting on stage is not a daily activity, right?
00:19:22.880 --> 00:19:23.279
Right.
00:19:23.519 --> 00:19:44.000
Um, so there are other ways to think about that change in chemistry and to say yes to it rather than try to make it go away, or even um just really focus on what it is you're trying to do with the opportunity and or who it's for.
00:19:44.400 --> 00:19:57.039
So I don't even really talk about grounding because when people bring grounding into it, they often add a lot of pressure through their legs, the lower body.
00:19:57.200 --> 00:20:00.160
And here's another thing, and you can see what happens here.
00:20:00.240 --> 00:20:10.240
So, what I'm doing is I'm sort of pushing my pelvis forward a little bit to add energy to my legs, and this also impacts my breathing.
00:20:10.400 --> 00:20:12.640
I'm gonna run out of air in just a moment.
00:20:13.599 --> 00:20:23.200
So I'm often talking people out of grounding into connecting to your intention.
00:20:23.440 --> 00:20:34.960
Might be the same, it might just be a language thing, but connecting to um your intention, noticing all the aspects of your body, the stuff that's not touching your ground.
00:20:35.039 --> 00:20:36.559
I'm wiggling my fingers right now.
00:20:36.720 --> 00:20:40.000
The stuff that is touching the ground, I'm pointing to my feet.
00:20:40.240 --> 00:20:48.319
Um, so all of these are just different experiences of different aspects of my body that are in this particular relationship to gravity right now.
00:20:49.759 --> 00:20:54.720
So I'm really looking at the whole self as you meet the moment.
00:20:55.599 --> 00:20:56.240
Yeah.
00:20:57.119 --> 00:20:58.400
Oh, I love that.
00:20:59.440 --> 00:21:04.240
And I do talk about grounding, and I appreciate your perspective on the word.
00:21:04.400 --> 00:21:06.799
I do, and and the physicality of that.
00:21:07.119 --> 00:21:26.319
I have definitely found when my body wants to embody grounding, when I hear that word in my head and how that echoes through my body, I almost release my pelvis a little bit, soften my knees.
00:21:26.400 --> 00:21:37.039
But this I think is very uh connected to the dance that I because I spent so many years doing fusion dance with a lot of belly dance influence within that.
00:21:37.119 --> 00:21:43.519
So your hips had to be isolated in a sense from the the upper parts of your body.
00:21:43.759 --> 00:21:53.920
And so when I think grounding, my hips sort of release like a a bell on a string just drops down.
00:21:54.559 --> 00:21:59.680
Um but I also know that.
00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:04.079
That there is a heaviness that I don't want within that grounding.
00:22:04.240 --> 00:22:08.720
And so then I have to remind myself the grounding are the roots.
00:22:09.119 --> 00:22:15.759
You are still the tall oak or whatever tree I'm really resonating with in the moment.
00:22:16.319 --> 00:22:34.559
And so that sort of brings me back up into that connected hips are now back attached to my spine and not dangling below with with you know no connection to how the rest of my body is presenting.
00:22:35.279 --> 00:22:35.839
Right.
00:22:36.640 --> 00:22:45.279
But yeah, it words, they're just not enough words, and also at the same time there, because there's just so many words, and we all think of them differently.
00:22:45.359 --> 00:22:47.519
And yes, what an adventure.
00:22:47.920 --> 00:22:52.960
Language is it's wildly imprecise language to describe human experience.
00:22:53.279 --> 00:22:57.920
But I think this is a great, a great example of two interpretations of the same word.
00:22:58.480 --> 00:23:00.319
Our intention is the same, right?
00:23:00.480 --> 00:23:15.599
To yeah kind of let gravity do its job and respond with that um life-filled energy that's in this current gravitational circumstance, right?
00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:16.160
Right.
00:23:16.400 --> 00:23:18.880
Probably in similar circumstances right now.
00:23:18.960 --> 00:23:19.359
Yeah.
00:23:19.599 --> 00:23:28.000
And and yeah, if I see somebody over like that, we we talked about the overpuffing, then there's some people who are like extra up.
00:23:28.079 --> 00:23:36.559
I'm kind of standing on my toes a little bit, kind of like, oh, I'm it almost like you can imagine a kid at Christmas being easily anticipating something, right?
00:23:36.799 --> 00:23:43.039
People who bring their show their excitement in that way, that's where I'm like, okay, let gravity have its way with you.
00:23:43.359 --> 00:23:52.720
Because this energy is um not sustainable, and maybe an audience wouldn't love it if we're working on a public speaking thing.
00:23:53.039 --> 00:23:55.279
Right, right, exactly.
00:23:55.839 --> 00:24:03.519
Oh, I mean, I have definitely even just in this is a call to one of your other videos that you posted.
00:24:03.920 --> 00:24:09.119
Um even just on everything virtual.
00:24:10.160 --> 00:24:23.599
If you're sitting down, that leaning forward is almost the same thing as being up on your toes that you were just talking about, but you have this video about leaning forward towards whoever is talking.
00:24:23.759 --> 00:24:25.920
I have done that so much of my life.
00:24:26.079 --> 00:24:37.920
And I I'm I think I can attribute it now to like really making them know that I'm listening, but also making sure I'm really listening.
00:24:38.079 --> 00:24:38.240
Right.
00:24:38.640 --> 00:24:47.200
And being able to relax or just sit upright and not leaning forward.
00:24:47.920 --> 00:25:00.960
There is a visual difference that the person speaking is gonna have when they see you either leaning towards the mic more and towards the camera more, and really I really hear you.
00:25:01.279 --> 00:25:29.279
Yeah, really getting in there versus I no, I'm I'm here in this space and I can hold you still or have the conversation make the presentation, but I don't need to force anything on you or expect you to handle the energy that's coming at you because even visually on a Zoom call, there is a huge difference.
00:25:30.079 --> 00:25:30.720
Right.
00:25:31.599 --> 00:25:36.480
And how does it feel from you to you from the inside to do that differently?
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:45.680
It took some getting used to, and I still find my I it's my my instinct is to lean forward.
00:25:46.000 --> 00:25:48.000
Um yeah, we want to be close to people.
00:25:48.160 --> 00:25:49.599
That's the good instinct, right?
00:25:49.759 --> 00:25:51.839
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
00:25:52.240 --> 00:26:22.640
And when I I've actually had to sometimes force myself to lean all the way back just to counter it, just say no, you are like step back, they can still hear you, you can still hear them, relax, and then I come back to a neutral position, and it feels safer, it feels I'm I don't think I am denying them anything.
00:26:22.960 --> 00:26:28.240
But yeah, I still really want to jump through that screen and give everybody a big hug.
00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:30.480
Like it's yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:26:30.799 --> 00:26:51.359
I think some of some of the the you know, the the the um posts that you're talking about are things where like I probably was talking more about about public speaking or just about, you know, when you're on a call, you want to make sure somebody gets that you're listening and understanding, so there's extra signaling because we're not in the same room.
00:26:51.599 --> 00:26:51.920
Yeah.
00:26:52.079 --> 00:26:58.559
Um what's what's really behind that for me is the function of me when I'm doing it.
00:26:58.640 --> 00:27:04.079
Like if I'm out here, well, a bunch of stuff is getting compromised in my system.
00:27:04.319 --> 00:27:06.960
Whereas here, I can go anywhere, do anything.
00:27:07.119 --> 00:27:15.519
And my expression, you know, I can jump forward and be more like signal more excitement than I can if I'm already there, right?
00:27:15.599 --> 00:27:17.440
Then I then there's nowhere to go.
00:27:17.839 --> 00:27:18.720
Right, right.
00:27:18.960 --> 00:27:24.480
It's that same place that a lot of martial artists like the the sort of neutral stance that martial artists come from.
00:27:24.640 --> 00:27:29.599
Like you can redirect the energy if you were standing new, whatever their neutral is.
00:27:29.839 --> 00:27:36.480
I'm just imagining Bruce Lee just standing as if he's doing nothing at all.
00:27:36.559 --> 00:27:40.240
And then somebody comes up and he's like, does whatever he does.
00:27:40.319 --> 00:27:42.480
And yes, like, where did that come from?
00:27:42.640 --> 00:27:45.440
It's because he knew where he was at the time.
00:27:45.680 --> 00:27:46.559
Yeah, yeah.
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:47.359
Yeah.
00:27:47.680 --> 00:27:48.720
And you talk a lot.
00:27:49.039 --> 00:28:03.599
You know, kind of technically, if your muscles are already on to hold you in this in a position, so if he was already in some kind of I'm I'm not gonna imitate person here, but if he was already in some extreme position, right, his muscles are busy holding that extreme position.
00:28:03.680 --> 00:28:10.160
He has to get out of that before doing something else instead of just moving to the appropriate response.
00:28:10.480 --> 00:28:11.440
Yeah, yeah.
00:28:11.680 --> 00:28:26.720
And that's yeah, the the responding versus the reacting, and and and I feel like if you're many of us have been in that constant reaction mode with dysregulated nervous systems.
00:28:26.960 --> 00:28:56.640
And so pulling back and allowing that response is such a hard transition, but such a huh, such a magnificent one to be able to understand and start shifting your life towards so that you can have the space, the time, the energy to do what needs to be done, as opposed to you're already in one place pulling back and then moving in a different direction.
00:28:57.119 --> 00:29:01.519
Um because you're starting then from yeah, like the negative place.
00:29:02.960 --> 00:29:05.680
If you're trying to do something differently.
00:29:05.920 --> 00:29:07.119
Um Right.
00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:07.839
Yeah.
00:29:08.160 --> 00:29:09.759
Or like an activated place.
00:29:09.839 --> 00:29:14.480
You're already your energy is already headed one direction, you have to kind of retract it.
00:29:14.799 --> 00:29:15.039
Yeah.
00:29:15.200 --> 00:29:15.359
Yeah.
00:29:15.440 --> 00:29:18.559
It kind of makes me think of like you said react and respond.
00:29:18.640 --> 00:29:26.000
It kind of makes me think of um lost my train of thought.
00:29:26.160 --> 00:29:27.119
There you go.
00:29:29.200 --> 00:29:31.279
Kind of makes me think of nothing, apparently.
00:29:35.599 --> 00:29:43.359
Oh, well, that I hopefully it'll it'll come back around and we'll tie back in.
00:29:43.440 --> 00:29:53.839
But it this also leads, you just posted today about um a new offer that you have called um uh on air ease.
00:29:54.720 --> 00:30:14.000
And oh that was, I was I could, I was like, this is exact, yes, yes, this is another wonderful extension of what you bring to the table with your knowledge and supporting people both speaking virtually and in person.
00:30:14.400 --> 00:30:18.160
I just I thought it was a great entitle.
00:30:18.400 --> 00:30:19.680
Love it, love it.
00:30:20.240 --> 00:30:25.279
So, yeah, can you speak to tell everybody what on air ease is?
00:30:25.519 --> 00:30:29.039
So on air ease is a is a really it's kind of a mini offer.
00:30:29.119 --> 00:30:32.960
It's um one private coaching session plus one group lab.
00:30:33.119 --> 00:30:57.119
So in the private coaching session, we would look at what's the thing that right now you're really curious about or that's getting in your way or showing up, whether it's on podcasts, on stage, on reels, whatever it is, my um, you know, my not so hidden agenda is economic empowerment for marginalized people.
00:30:57.279 --> 00:31:01.440
So yes, uh women, weirdos and queerdos are kind of my people.
00:31:01.759 --> 00:31:19.920
Um so I want to make sure that if there's an obstacle that and if the obstacle is your nervous system, you running out of breath, you feeling, you you translating, that you feeling like being an introvert and being on camera don't go together.
00:31:20.079 --> 00:31:38.000
Any any of those messages or internal feelings that might get in the way of you showing up in a way that's going to support your business, you're making money, you're getting that next um job, whatever it is that's that could impact your personal performance.
00:31:38.400 --> 00:31:43.920
And anyway, so yeah, so this would just be a little mini sample to say, like, okay, what's one thing that's affecting you?
00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:45.440
Let's see if we can sort it out.
00:31:45.599 --> 00:31:48.480
And then in the group class, you could put it into action.
00:31:48.720 --> 00:31:57.039
So if you were doing public speaking, or if you were just wanting to meet people, you could kind of role play that or practice that in a group.
00:31:57.119 --> 00:32:02.720
So much of the stimulus that we get that gets in our way is because of social stuff, right?
00:32:03.039 --> 00:32:03.359
Yeah.
00:32:03.599 --> 00:32:11.920
So actually practicing this um coordination around people is a very helpful tool.
00:32:12.400 --> 00:32:13.039
Yeah.
00:32:13.359 --> 00:32:18.480
And is the is the group lab in-person, virtual?
00:32:18.720 --> 00:32:21.039
How does it there are two versions?
00:32:21.119 --> 00:32:25.599
So I do one in person here in Seattle, and then I also do online labs.
00:32:25.839 --> 00:32:29.200
Um, one of those is on Wednesday afternoons, one's on Thursday morning.
00:32:29.359 --> 00:32:38.160
So kind of um added some new possibilities for people so I can work with more people across the country and around the globe.
00:32:38.960 --> 00:32:41.839
Yay! Yeah, oh my goodness.
00:32:42.480 --> 00:32:58.880
This great offer, the opportunities to do it in having the chance to go through something privately, but then put it into practice in such a safe environment is really helpful.
00:32:59.200 --> 00:33:21.680
And I I find that some of the people that I've come across think that it's just a matter of pushing through and doing something, it's a matter of having the right mindset, it's just nailing that one viral video or whatever, and then they'll be fine.
00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:47.759
And this is what you're offering is to get through a little bit of that initial chaos, that hesitancy, but ultimately you're gonna be giving them tools that are going to really just extend their ability to show up more connected internally so they can be more connected externally.
00:33:47.920 --> 00:33:49.599
And yeah, there you go.
00:33:49.759 --> 00:33:51.359
Yeah, ding, ding, ding.
00:33:52.960 --> 00:33:56.960
Yeah, it's more connected so you can be more connected.
00:33:57.200 --> 00:33:57.839
Yeah.
00:33:59.359 --> 00:34:03.039
Oh well, this has been such a lovely conversation.
00:34:03.279 --> 00:34:06.559
Oh my goodness, I'm so grateful to have you here.
00:34:07.119 --> 00:34:11.440
Uh and just in time, a cat is busting through the door.
00:34:11.679 --> 00:34:15.599
Uh I we'll see if she gets through.
00:34:15.840 --> 00:34:28.400
Um, I would like to know what is one thing that you are grateful for in your body today.
00:34:30.000 --> 00:34:35.199
In my body today, I was thinking about it earlier, so I I do have an answer.
00:34:35.440 --> 00:34:42.880
In my body today, I'm grateful that even at the ripe old age at 58, I'm still getting stronger.
00:34:43.119 --> 00:34:46.800
So that's uh I'm grateful for that.
00:34:47.519 --> 00:34:48.400
Excellent.
00:34:48.559 --> 00:34:49.360
I love that.
00:34:49.840 --> 00:34:51.360
Yeah, strength.
00:34:52.639 --> 00:34:55.039
Um, I am grateful.
00:34:55.920 --> 00:35:08.320
I'm grateful that there are many things that I can do still physically that I used to be able to do much better even five years ago.
00:35:09.199 --> 00:35:13.760
But that my body feels ready to come back to those things again.
00:35:15.039 --> 00:35:15.679
Yeah.
00:35:17.280 --> 00:35:17.920
Yeah.
00:35:18.559 --> 00:35:27.039
Been doing more dancing recently, and it is in certain ways felt challenging, but my body says, I remember.
00:35:27.599 --> 00:35:29.840
You just have to give me a little more time.
00:35:30.480 --> 00:35:47.840
And yeah, but I appreciate that it still remembers because mentally I remember, but like, right, yeah, when that that distance that we we think never happened, like, oh, I could do a cartwell when I was six, of course I can do it now when I'm 48.
00:35:48.079 --> 00:35:50.159
Like, how would that have changed?
00:35:50.480 --> 00:35:53.440
It changes, yeah, it changed.
00:35:55.599 --> 00:35:56.000
Yeah.
00:35:56.239 --> 00:35:59.840
So yes, yeah, I'm learning more about what changes.
00:36:00.559 --> 00:36:01.039
Yeah.
00:36:01.280 --> 00:36:01.840
Yeah.
00:36:02.159 --> 00:36:03.039
What falls away.
00:36:03.199 --> 00:36:05.440
And there are some things that fall away, and that's okay.
00:36:05.840 --> 00:36:06.079
Yeah.
00:36:06.320 --> 00:36:07.519
We don't need all of it.
00:36:07.840 --> 00:36:08.880
No, no.
00:36:09.840 --> 00:36:11.679
And there's other things that we gained.
00:36:11.760 --> 00:36:24.320
I mean, there may not be quite this quite the same thing, but man, to just to to have the ability, the the opportunity to continue learning.
00:36:24.480 --> 00:36:28.159
Like, what a what an awesome thing.
00:36:29.679 --> 00:36:30.159
Huh.
00:36:31.199 --> 00:36:31.920
Yeah.
00:36:32.880 --> 00:36:36.719
Well, I want to thank you again for being here.
00:36:37.119 --> 00:36:38.079
So appreciate you.
00:36:38.320 --> 00:36:39.199
Thank you for having me.
00:36:40.159 --> 00:36:42.639
And thank you all for listening.
00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:50.559
Um, I'm gonna put all of well, where's the best place that they can find more information, connect with you?
00:36:51.440 --> 00:36:56.480
There's my website, Chrispenspaith.com, or if you're a LinkedIn person, I'm also there.
00:36:56.639 --> 00:37:02.559
My name is impossible to spell, so I would defer to SuperKate to spell it out for you.
00:37:02.800 --> 00:37:04.159
Yeah, it'll be in the show notes.
00:37:04.320 --> 00:37:06.480
All the connections will be in the show notes.
00:37:08.480 --> 00:37:09.840
Um, excellent.
00:37:10.239 --> 00:37:17.599
Well, I'm grateful to connect with you today, and I look forward to doing more in the future.
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:18.639
Yeah, yeah.
00:37:19.199 --> 00:37:20.079
Sure, I'll see you.
00:37:20.320 --> 00:37:20.559
Yes.
00:37:22.960 --> 00:37:24.320
All right, thank you, everyone.
