Robert Smigel (and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog)

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Ahem, yes.
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Hello, my name is Triumph, the insult comic dog. And
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I'm very proud to be Marc Maron's friend. LAUGHTER Very
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proud indeed. How have you been?
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You look good. I'm feeling neurotic. I've been feeling a
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little neurotic lately. Are we good? We're good.
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Are we good?
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We're good. That's your sketch phrase. I love that. No,
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wait a minute. You're not Mark, man. I'm Conan. My
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name's Conan. Conan O'Donnell. Yes, yes. The guy I carried
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on my back for how many years? It was at
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least 10. It was a decade. It was about 10.
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It was about 10. Yeah, yeah. I peaked around 2009.
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Let me see here. Okay, let me change mine. Six? Oh,
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come on. Give me nine. At least give me nine. Okay, 2009.
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If you average between six and the Wiener Circle sketch,
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it comes out.
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Comes out in 2009. Very nice. Okay. Starting over.
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My name is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, and I'm
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proud to be Conan O'Brien's friend.
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And like most of his friends, I'm not real.
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You see, because everybody pretends. No, Conan, honestly, I've known
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this guy for years. I'm one of those people who
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gets to proudly say that I knew you at the
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very beginning, and here I am, at what is clearly
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the end.
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No, it's great. No, you got the podcast. And now
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look at you. You're on satellite radio.
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Satellite radio, the wave of the past. Sirius XM. The
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abandoned mall of the entertainment industry.
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No, it all makes total sense. It's like that old saying,
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why get your milk for free when you could rent
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the cow for $ 21. 99 a month? Serious subscription, yes. No, no,
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I kid, I kid. I kid, I kid. I really
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do kid. You kid. No, Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend.
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What a great title.
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I just have to ask, Why start the show now
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instead of in middle school when it could have made
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a difference?
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Imagine having friends back then.
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Imagine what it would have been like. No, I do
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love the new show. I love, you know, the banter
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and the way you've managed.
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I am so impressed.
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The way you've managed to abuse your staff in a
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very kind of way that the audience thinks is ironic is.
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Just very impressive. So impressive.
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No, listen, folks, he's a complicated man. Complicated man. The
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comedian with a dark side. You know, you're like Pagliacci,
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the clown. And that's just for how much makeup you
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have on.
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This guy, Conan's in the makeup chair longer than Jim
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Carrey as the Grinch.
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No, I kid, I kid.
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You haven't aged. You've grown. You've evolved. Yes.
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You know, back when Conan started, guys, he would nervously
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talk over all his guests. But here it is 30
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years later, and now he talks over them with total confidence.
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I love this man. I love this man. Conan gave
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me a career. He gave me a career back then.
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He helped me grow up.
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He also helped me through some very hard times, like
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when I walked in on him naked in his dressing room.
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Oh, God.
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Oh, God. Red pubes.
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Like staring into the face of Raggedy Andy. Anyway, on
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a happier note, so now. Everyone loves Sona, the pride
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of little Armenia. You know, I think I might be
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part Armenian or Pomeranian.
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Either way, I have a hairy back.
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I kid.
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That's a stereotype. Terrible.
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That is an unfair stereotype. Not all Armenians have hairy backs.
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There's Armenian toddlers. Up to six months, no hair.
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Let's be honest, though. Let's be honest.
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All of us owe Conan so much. Conan made me
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a star. Conan made Sona a star. And Conan made
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Matt somewhat recognizable in the Glendale Public Library. Seriously, he
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can't walk into that library without at least one person
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wondering where they know him from.
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All right.
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Honestly, honestly. No offense.
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Love everyone in this room. Even the gray-haired guy in
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the back. I'm so honored to be here and so
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honored to be on this incredible podcast.
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For me to poop on! Welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs
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a Friend. Sona Misesian joining me. How are you, Sona?
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I am.
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I'm joining. That's very nice. Okay. You're not talking to
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a lawyer here. It's all okay. And, of course, Matt Gorley.
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How are you, Matt? I am Matt Gorley. Okay. Ah, yes, yes.
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I have many questions. I did want to bring up
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something right away. This is a little bit of business.
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I don't usually do that. Usually we just chit-chat and
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we say stuff and we find our way. But I
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have an agenda today. Oh, okay. As you guys know,
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I have a channel over on SiriusXM. And what's fun
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is that SiriusXM said, do well by us, kid, and
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we'll move you up the dial. I was at 106.
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Yeah?
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And I was like, I'm at 106 now. But I
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want to move on up. Well, guess what? They've moved
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me up. If you're in your car, if you have
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access to Sirius XM anywhere, or if you're on the
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Sirius XM app and you say, man, I'm jonesing for
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some classic Conan. Yeah. Which I often say that myself.
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That's how sick I am. I'll be alone in cones.
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I'm jonesing for myself. You can check me out on 104.
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I moved up two notches. All right.
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Yes.
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Congrats. Thanks. It's now. And we decided, let's just call
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it what it is. It was Team Coco. And I
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was like, let's call it Conan O'Brien Radio. Okay. That's
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what it is. So it's Conan O'Brien Radio. It's on 104. Wow.
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And this is a way that you can listen to me.
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I mean, it's all the stuff from 30 years of. Television,
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but also the podcast plays there too. Oh. And yeah.
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And recipes. There's no recipes.
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Oh, okay.
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I shouldn't have said that. That's a lie and I'll
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get in trouble for that. But a lot of fun
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stuff is going to be on there. But a new
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thing we're going to be doing also is taking, I'm
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going to take some live calls.
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Oh, from anyone?
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From anybody in the world.
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Yeah.
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So this is like without a net. Yes. Without a net. Hmm.
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People can ask you anything? Anything they want. And here's
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the best part. I'm not wearing clothes.
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As I take the questions.
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Sorry, you said that's the best part.
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Yeah.
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That's confusing.
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Oh, I'm sorry. The worst and most inappropriate part is
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that I'm not wearing clothes when I'm asked questions. And
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you can't tell it's radio, but I just want that
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mental image in everyone's head. And I have not taken
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care of myself. And so that should be in there too.
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I mean, really, I wasn't starting off with anything great.
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But man.
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Oh, poor Eduardo.
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I'm a mental.
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Yeah.
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No, Eduardo was horrified. Eduardo got those X-Men shades. That's right.
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Like Cyclops? Yeah. He wore like a whole Cyclops thing
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so he wouldn't have to see my naked body.
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I don't think you understand how those work.
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You nerd. He's the nerd. I'm the nerd. I'm going
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to go home. I'm filled with shame, Liza. What happened?
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I made the wrong reference to the X-Men. Apparently Cyclops'
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helmet does not work as shades. Anyway. It controls his
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laser eyes. That's right. Not a helmet. That goes without saying.
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Right? Yeah.
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What is it? Are you an X-Men expert too? It's
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not a helmet. Yeah. Yeah, it's just, it's his glasses,
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but he controls the lasers that come out of his eyes. Oh, Magneto.
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Thank you. That's the helmet. Yeah. Thank you. I mean,
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don't just look at me that way. She knows. Are
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there whole, like, they should do things occasionally where they
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can't find Magneto, and then they go in the kitchen
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and he's stuck in the refrigerator? And his legs are kicking?
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That's not how it works.
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You don't know how his power works.
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Yeah.
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Do you mean?
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He would control the refrigerator.
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The refrigerator sticks to him. The refrigerator doesn't control him. No,
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I love the idea that he's like just about to
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do something really cool and then he gets too close
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to the refrigerator and and then someone comes by and
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puts a to-do list on him. Buy milk, get more ham.
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He's like, God damn it! You have to know these things.
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What if someone calls your radio station and asks you
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about X-Men stuff?
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What if Ian McKellen... Well, I will just... Oh, well,
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first of all, yeah, that's true. Ian McKellen might call.
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I could just say, I'm sorry, Sir McKellen. I'm familiar
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with your other work, but not this stuff you phone
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in just for the big check. That I'm not too
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familiar with. But, sir, at the Royal Shakespeare Theatre, I'd
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watch you any day! Anyway, that's my, I forget where
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we were going with this. Your call-in show. Your call-in show.
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It's a call-in show, and it's just gonna be like this,
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except instead of you two showbiz phonies, it's real people.
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Real humans.
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We should call in.
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I wanna call in.
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Real people with souls. You probably have forgotten what that
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looked like. Sonya, you sold your soul to the devil
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long ago to get this sweet Conan gig. What's that
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say about you, though? You sold your soul to a
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long time ago. I sure did. Yeah. To NBC. Oh yeah.
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Hundreds of dollars in return. Have you recorded one of
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these yet?
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Yeah.
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Oh, cool. Was it fun? It was fun. It was
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really good. Okay. Mr. Groose, you were there? I was there,
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and you have the power to take the channel live
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and do these shows when you want. Yeah, it's really fun. What?
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You're giving him that power? What I'm finding is that SiriusXM, foolishly,
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it's like they gave a kid with Sirius ADD a
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go-kart that can go 900 miles an hour.
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Oh, man.
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And then they gave him some cocaine. That's what it
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feels like.
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Oh.
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Not that SXM would ever do anything like that. It's terrible.
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But that's how it feels, is I get to go
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live and just talk to people anytime I want. The
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first one's available on demand. What's the phone number? Why
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do you keep asking me things I don't know the
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answer to? Because I want to see you scramble. Okay. Oh,
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what's the molecular weight of strontium? Just curious. Do you
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have that with you?
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Why did you bring up Magneto and Cyclops when you
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don't know anything about the two of them?
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I know kind of about some of the X-Men. Not
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enough to reference them correctly. Look, I don't know a
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lot about the X-Men. I know that there's a Wolverine. Yeah,
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what kind of bones he got? He's got bones made
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of something real hard. Yeah. And then I know he
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can't go through TSA at the airport without causing a
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real fuss. Magneto is always getting stuck to a refrigerator,
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which emasculates him at the worst time. Cyclops keeps killing
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his optometrist accidentally. Now, what seems to be the.
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If you wrote an X-Men movie, it would be the
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most boring movie. No, it'd be really fun. I might
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be into that. It'd be pretty funny. This is my
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X-Men movie.
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Yeah.
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But anyway, this is the kind of foolishness that you
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can hear on Conan O'Brien Radio 104 on your SXM dial.
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And check it out because it's a lot of fun
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to do. And we should probably move on because we
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have a singular show today. This show is very important
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to me. You're going to love it, but it has
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personal importance to me because my guest is one of
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the great writers, one of the great comedy writers of
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all time. He's also a comedian. He wrote on Saturday
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Night Live while I was there. We wrote a lot
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of things together, but he was a force to be
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reckoned with. And he was also the first head writer
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on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and really helped us
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get launched. And his DNA is such a part of
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what we managed to do, unless you're not a fan,
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in which case you can blame him. Either way, he's
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just been such an important part of my life. He's
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also the mastermind behind Triumph of the Unsold Comic Dog.
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And his new movie, Leo, is now streaming on Netflix. Netflix.
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So I'm more than thrilled he's here today. He's a friend.
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And this conversation has special meaning for me. Robert Smigel, welcome.
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This is gonna be a shock to people, but I
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don't think I've seen you whenever we've done that. All
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these times we've done it? All the times we've done it,
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I look at the puppet and what I see is
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the top of your curly hair. From the very beginning,
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I wouldn't see you So to see you, it was
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even the same with the clutch cargos. I wouldn't see you.
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I would see just the lips. But right now, watching
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you do it was kind of like a revelation to me.
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Seeing what? How much I enjoy it? Well, I always
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knew how much you enjoyed it.
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And the giggling from the incessant giggling, yes.
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Because just... That's crazy to me that I haven't seen
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you do it. That is so weird. Yeah, that is funny.
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Because I'm always- Everybody else has. Now, Triumph, please. But
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to see you do it- Right, I'm always behind you. Yeah,
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it kind of was like there's no Santa Claus now.
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You've ruined it for the children.
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We have to- There's so much to talk about, but
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we got to start with the dog. We just have to.
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It was the first thing that I loved about the dog,
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and it's still the thing I love the most about
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the dog are the eyes. I know. The eyes of
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the dog. They're just dead and crazy at the same time. Yes, everything,
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you know, the writing has always been spectacular. A lot
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of writers help me, always. The voice was always crazy choice.
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We should tell people the origin story because it came
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out of this thing we were doing on the show,
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which was a talent show. The idea was maybe there'll
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be this talent show and we'll use whatever we have
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to do to pretend.
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Well, it all came out of this insane... like directive
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we created for the show. And that was a mantra
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that I drove the writers crazy with, which was just like,
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we're not gonna do any found humor. Like I was
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obsessed with, we're not gonna copy Dave Letterman, because we
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worship this guy. Even when we were at Saturday Night Live,
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we secretly knew that Dave's show was the coolest show
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on TV. As much as I loved Conan and believed
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in him, I just thought nobody can do stuff that
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Dave's doing.
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Right.
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Including remotes, which shows what a shitty producer I was.
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I was like, Conan can't do remotes because Dave doesn't.
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And I've seen Pat Sajak do it. And Pat Sajak's
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as good as Conan.
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And he failed. Who can follow Sajak?
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Yeah. If Sajak can't do it, how can my best
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friend do it?
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00:16:50.340 --> 00:16:53.840
It's impossible. No, I was... But, you know, we had...
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Because I remember... even before the show started, we would
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talk a lot about, almost like we had these rules.
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And a lot of it was, there was a, don't
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do anything that Dave had done, but also, I didn't
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think that was as big a worry because we both
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loved cartoons too much.
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00:17:11.640 --> 00:17:14.369
No, we were naturally suited to what we wanted to do.
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We naturally wanted to do very silly, strange things that were,
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but But even when we used to do actual items
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and it was the first piece we ever did on
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the show, which was our shot across the bow. Yes.
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Because Jay would do the thing where he'd go, oh,
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and I see this here. It was just real ads
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from like Sears and Roebuck and this.
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And in fairness, that was small town news from Dave.
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Yeah. Jay borrowed. I borrowed it. I just borrowed it.
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It's all fine. Dave can have it back. Dave can
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have it back. He can't do the Tonight Show. But
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he can have it back anytime he wants. He can
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have it anytime he wants. I love doing K's. Dave
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invented headlines all of a sudden. He did. No, no, no, no.
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You do it. You do it. Cause I'm, you know, whatever.
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00:18:00.029 --> 00:18:04.049
But that was the first, first bit we did. And yeah, Lauren,
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Lauren really wanted that on the first show.
349
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Yeah. Lorne Michaels.
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00:18:07.369 --> 00:18:08.890
Yes, Lorne Michaels from television.
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And now from everything. I'm everywhere. I make clothes. I'm
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right here. Hi, everybody. I'm right here. Do you have
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00:18:17.160 --> 00:18:19.059
my leisure suit? Conan, do you really want to go
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00:18:19.099 --> 00:18:23.099
with those sneakers? I want to take people back in
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00:18:23.160 --> 00:18:27.640
time to when I first met you would be 1988,
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00:18:27.619 --> 00:18:31.690
the very beginning of 1988. My writing partner, Greg Daniels,
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and I get hired to come in to work at SNL.
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We're petrified.
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Yes.
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00:18:36.630 --> 00:18:40.099
And I remembered finding there was just this natural thing
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00:18:40.119 --> 00:18:44.559
where I gravitated towards you and Bob Odenkirk, who's now
362
00:18:44.599 --> 00:18:51.559
the Jacques-Clan Van Damme. I always knew. We always knew.
363
00:18:51.579 --> 00:18:56.220
We always knew. That guy's gonna have a John Wick franchise.
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00:18:56.240 --> 00:18:58.339
He's gonna have a stuntman and yeah.
365
00:18:58.579 --> 00:19:02.420
And then we started naturally just all goofing around together.
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00:19:02.559 --> 00:19:05.099
And then I think the thing that was really life-changing
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00:19:05.140 --> 00:19:09.000
for me is that you, a few years before, had
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00:19:09.059 --> 00:19:12.140
done a show in Chicago, a stage show, and the
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00:19:12.180 --> 00:19:14.599
writer's strike hit, and you and Odenkirk were talking.
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00:19:14.619 --> 00:19:14.690
Yes.
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And you said, hey, we might go to Chicago and
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do a stage show with sketches that are too weird
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to get on SNL. Right. And then you guys asked me,
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would I come along? I was thrilled. I had a
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00:19:27.880 --> 00:19:33.950
1973 Plymouth Valiant that I flew to L.A., which is
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00:19:33.970 --> 00:19:37.460
where my car was, and I drove my car to
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00:19:37.519 --> 00:19:41.259
Chicago by myself. And the car kept overheating like it's
378
00:19:41.299 --> 00:19:44.750
that old movie, Duel. It would overheat on hills and
379
00:19:44.769 --> 00:19:46.130
I would have to pull it over. And by the way,
380
00:19:46.190 --> 00:19:49.210
I think he was driving also a similar car. Was he?
381
00:19:49.740 --> 00:19:51.660
um i would pull it over and the steam would
382
00:19:51.920 --> 00:19:53.640
and then it would calm down and i had things
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00:19:53.700 --> 00:19:54.940
of water and i would pour them in and i
384
00:19:55.039 --> 00:20:00.619
made my way to chicago and that was where that
385
00:20:00.680 --> 00:20:03.059
changed that changed things for me because i thought i
386
00:20:03.200 --> 00:20:06.190
love this I love working with these guys I love
387
00:20:06.210 --> 00:20:08.569
that we're doing a stage show in Chicago I loved
388
00:20:08.609 --> 00:20:09.849
that summer the whole thing was.
389
00:20:09.809 --> 00:20:12.930
Magical yeah no I I still feel like my years
390
00:20:12.990 --> 00:20:15.849
in Chicago before I even got Saturday Night Live or
391
00:20:16.069 --> 00:20:18.730
like professionally in some way the happiest years of my
392
00:20:18.769 --> 00:20:21.650
whole life just being in total control of your own
393
00:20:21.759 --> 00:20:24.640
show and and just I love the city of Chicago
394
00:20:24.740 --> 00:20:27.640
too obviously but um but yeah no we loved you
395
00:20:27.720 --> 00:20:30.200
so much uh when we met you you're such a
396
00:20:30.220 --> 00:20:34.039
funny guy and uh Bob and I, like, I thought
397
00:20:34.059 --> 00:20:35.799
I was going to get fired from Saturday Night Live
398
00:20:35.839 --> 00:20:39.759
in the summer of 86. I did one season at
399
00:20:39.940 --> 00:20:43.339
SNL and I just barely hung on. Franken called me
400
00:20:43.400 --> 00:20:44.059
over the summer.
401
00:20:44.079 --> 00:20:44.700
Al Franken.
402
00:20:45.240 --> 00:20:46.380
It's not looking good.
403
00:20:46.400 --> 00:20:48.920
I don't know.
404
00:20:49.140 --> 00:20:52.400
You know, just a lot of people are, you know,
405
00:20:52.480 --> 00:20:53.599
it was a hard year.
406
00:20:53.759 --> 00:20:58.160
And, you know, who really was funny? Swartzwell. I can't
407
00:20:58.220 --> 00:20:59.279
remember what he wrote.
408
00:21:00.119 --> 00:21:04.329
Anyway, I'm sorry. It's just, yeah. So, but then Lauren
409
00:21:04.410 --> 00:21:07.930
called me in at the last minute, but, but Odenkirk
410
00:21:07.970 --> 00:21:10.619
and I were developing a sketch show that summer. We
411
00:21:10.630 --> 00:21:13.640
were going to call it sketch com 90 or something. And, uh,
412
00:21:14.299 --> 00:21:16.119
and that's like where I first had the idea for
413
00:21:16.160 --> 00:21:19.940
the year 2000 sketch, which we ended up doing on happy, happy,
414
00:21:19.960 --> 00:21:20.400
good show.
415
00:21:20.579 --> 00:21:22.079
We did it in Chicago in 1988.
416
00:21:22.079 --> 00:21:22.440
Yeah.
417
00:21:23.000 --> 00:21:25.299
And we would all stand there and in the year 2000,
418
00:21:25.299 --> 00:21:28.119
and then we would make these insane predictions about what
419
00:21:28.180 --> 00:21:30.180
was then the future.
420
00:21:30.599 --> 00:21:30.819
Yes.
421
00:21:30.880 --> 00:21:32.759
It was all based on this Jetsons.
422
00:21:33.519 --> 00:21:36.539
Concept in the 60s that 60s kids grew up with,
423
00:21:36.579 --> 00:21:39.259
which was the idea that like the space age is coming,
424
00:21:39.880 --> 00:21:42.259
like by the year 2000, it had so.
425
00:21:42.160 --> 00:21:43.200
Much mystique to it.
426
00:21:43.660 --> 00:21:45.609
And then as we got closer to the year 2000,
427
00:21:45.589 --> 00:21:47.670
it was quite clear that it was going to be
428
00:21:47.690 --> 00:21:48.150
very disappointing.
429
00:21:48.170 --> 00:21:52.309
Well, then the awkward thing was doing it still. I mean,
430
00:21:52.450 --> 00:21:57.210
late night, we never, late night, despite everyone's predictions, kept
431
00:21:57.269 --> 00:21:59.609
going and going and going and lasted and actually started,
432
00:21:59.710 --> 00:22:03.359
you know, worked. And then we're doing it. And then
433
00:22:03.390 --> 00:22:05.440
it is the year 2000. And the year 2004. And
434
00:22:05.460 --> 00:22:07.299
then it's, and then we, and we kept thinking, do
435
00:22:07.319 --> 00:22:09.920
we need to change like in the distant future? And I,
436
00:22:10.079 --> 00:22:12.279
and I said, no, no, it's just got to still
437
00:22:12.319 --> 00:22:14.319
be in the year 2000. It's so funny. And then
438
00:22:14.380 --> 00:22:17.099
it's like in 2006, I'm like, it's time to look
439
00:22:17.140 --> 00:22:22.009
into the future all the way to the year 2000.
440
00:22:22.009 --> 00:22:25.750
But it's a good problem to have. Yeah. So, so
441
00:22:25.789 --> 00:22:28.730
we did that show together. The one thing I remembered
442
00:22:28.789 --> 00:22:32.470
is feeling very much like, you could finish my sentence
443
00:22:32.509 --> 00:22:34.650
and I could finish your sentence.
444
00:22:34.849 --> 00:22:37.970
I only connected with a few writers in my years there,
445
00:22:38.250 --> 00:22:41.509
like really connected in different ways. Dana was one of them,
446
00:22:41.789 --> 00:22:45.809
Dana Carvey, as a performer almost, because I love doing
447
00:22:45.869 --> 00:22:48.809
silly voices and impressions. And so we wrote a lot
448
00:22:48.890 --> 00:22:52.549
of like musical impression kind of sketches like McLaughlin and
449
00:22:53.190 --> 00:22:56.640
Regis and things like that and Johnny Carson. And then Conan,
450
00:22:57.099 --> 00:22:59.819
I connected in a completely different way. Just, we had this,
451
00:23:00.279 --> 00:23:02.900
We just saw people from a distance and we were
452
00:23:03.000 --> 00:23:06.279
able to kind of like reduce everybody to a cartoon.
453
00:23:06.480 --> 00:23:09.309
Yes. Yeah. I was, because over the years people have
454
00:23:09.329 --> 00:23:13.170
said your biggest comedic influences and it's so cool to say, well,
455
00:23:13.529 --> 00:23:18.150
I would watch, you know, old clips of Ernie Kovacs
456
00:23:18.210 --> 00:23:20.490
and that really, and it's like, no, it's not true.
457
00:23:20.759 --> 00:23:24.339
Nothing inspired me more than Warner Brothers cartoons. Oh God. Yeah.
458
00:23:25.650 --> 00:23:28.519
So that the idea of anything can be alive, which
459
00:23:28.579 --> 00:23:32.420
then Paul Rubens used so brilliantly in Pee Wee's Playhouse.
460
00:23:32.920 --> 00:23:38.700
Oh yeah. The idea that everything chair is cherry. Yes. Anthropomorphize.
461
00:23:38.740 --> 00:23:40.720
This is a thing I've done a thousand times in
462
00:23:40.759 --> 00:23:42.039
comedy and I can never pronounce it.
463
00:23:42.119 --> 00:23:43.309
Anthropomorphize.
464
00:23:43.529 --> 00:23:44.529
Anthropomorphize.
465
00:23:44.630 --> 00:23:50.170
And even the word anthropomorphize can be a character. Hi,
466
00:23:50.269 --> 00:23:57.500
I'm anthropomorphize-y. What's up, anthropomorphize-y? But you- Why are you
467
00:23:57.559 --> 00:23:59.240
so damn hard to pronounce?
468
00:23:59.880 --> 00:24:04.019
That's just me, I guess.
469
00:24:05.940 --> 00:24:08.880
But we, so flash forward, I go and do The
470
00:24:08.920 --> 00:24:11.809
Simpsons and then, and it's too hard to explain, but
471
00:24:11.869 --> 00:24:14.680
all these crazy- Things happen. It's really the equivalent of
472
00:24:14.759 --> 00:24:16.940
me being in a cornfield and getting hit by a meteor.
473
00:24:16.960 --> 00:24:20.160
But all these things happen where suddenly they say, hey,
474
00:24:20.200 --> 00:24:24.440
you're going to replace David Letterman, the guy you idolize,
475
00:24:24.670 --> 00:24:28.049
who I said many times cannot be replaced. I said
476
00:24:28.329 --> 00:24:30.650
it's impossible to replace him. So I pity the guy
477
00:24:30.690 --> 00:24:33.190
who replaces him. I'm on record saying that. And I
478
00:24:33.230 --> 00:24:35.369
was salivating to replace him. Yeah.
479
00:24:35.490 --> 00:24:38.130
We had totally different dreams because he was hired to
480
00:24:38.170 --> 00:24:39.019
produce the show.
481
00:24:39.059 --> 00:24:39.210
Yeah.
482
00:24:39.519 --> 00:24:41.200
But his dream was not that.
483
00:24:41.819 --> 00:24:43.700
Like you say, you did Happy Happy Good Show and
484
00:24:43.720 --> 00:24:45.380
you were always the funniest guy in.
485
00:24:45.299 --> 00:24:46.279
The room at SNL.
486
00:24:46.720 --> 00:24:49.599
And I was more like, you know, broody Tom Jonovich,
487
00:24:49.759 --> 00:24:53.740
you know, just brooding writer. My hero was like Sylvester
488
00:24:53.799 --> 00:24:56.859
Pat Weaver, the guy who created the Today Show and
489
00:24:56.880 --> 00:24:57.619
the Tonight Show.
490
00:24:58.180 --> 00:24:59.619
I love the idea. I think that's the saddest thing
491
00:24:59.640 --> 00:25:02.289
I've ever heard anybody say. I was a pathetic nerd.
492
00:25:02.990 --> 00:25:07.789
Did you have a big poster of Pat Weaver? I do.
493
00:25:07.809 --> 00:25:09.869
I do understand. He understands.
494
00:25:10.269 --> 00:25:13.109
No, I would go to the Museum of Broadcasting or whatever,
495
00:25:13.210 --> 00:25:17.829
radio and television, and revel in these old, like, Dave Garroway.
496
00:25:17.329 --> 00:25:20.289
Talking to a chimp on the Today Show in the 50s.
497
00:25:20.430 --> 00:25:22.970
But what was interesting is, so they came, they said
498
00:25:23.019 --> 00:25:24.619
to me, okay, you're going to do this. And I
499
00:25:24.980 --> 00:25:27.279
said it then, I say it now, I said, I
500
00:25:27.319 --> 00:25:30.319
can do this if I do it with Robert. I said,
501
00:25:30.400 --> 00:25:32.519
I can do this if I do it with Robert Smigel,
502
00:25:32.839 --> 00:25:35.579
but I can't do it if it's not with Robert Smigel.
503
00:25:36.269 --> 00:25:38.309
And I don't think I ever heard that.
504
00:25:38.390 --> 00:25:40.150
I know you said you told me you wanted me
505
00:25:40.210 --> 00:25:40.599
to do it.
506
00:25:40.730 --> 00:25:42.190
I know. I didn't tell you I wanted you to
507
00:25:42.230 --> 00:25:43.900
do it. I said, you have to do it. And
508
00:25:43.940 --> 00:25:46.240
then I remembered there was stuff about, well, Robert's contract.
509
00:25:46.259 --> 00:25:46.900
We're not sure.
510
00:25:47.019 --> 00:25:48.799
And I was just didn't want me to leave.
511
00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:51.799
No, I know. But I was yelling at NBC, give
512
00:25:51.880 --> 00:25:55.000
him every, you know, like give him take stuff from
513
00:25:55.059 --> 00:25:56.339
me and give it to him. Like we have to
514
00:25:56.380 --> 00:25:59.299
do this together because I knew then I had a shot.
515
00:25:59.619 --> 00:26:04.019
And and it's true. Don't get self-conscious because I'm complimenting you.
516
00:26:04.849 --> 00:26:06.589
Take the paper away. That's my job.
517
00:26:18.160 --> 00:26:19.720
Good nights are about the people.
518
00:26:20.559 --> 00:26:21.019
The laughs.
519
00:26:21.539 --> 00:26:24.299
The real moments you don't want to miss. So why
520
00:26:24.359 --> 00:26:29.369
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521
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523
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524
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525
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You should not use this product if you do not
526
00:26:42.460 --> 00:26:43.259
already use nicotine.
527
00:26:44.890 --> 00:26:46.970
Not every day you meet an Irish legend.
528
00:26:47.150 --> 00:26:48.490
I know what you mean, Coo Collum.
529
00:26:48.690 --> 00:26:54.470
Leaping vast distances, holding off armies... Eating tons of fresh grass. What?
530
00:26:54.630 --> 00:26:57.730
Not you, or cows. That's one of the reasons Irish
531
00:26:57.769 --> 00:27:01.430
milk is so good. It's famous all over the world.
532
00:27:01.710 --> 00:27:02.210
Legend.
533
00:27:02.490 --> 00:27:03.259
Dairy.
534
00:27:03.799 --> 00:27:06.880
Ireland's grass and our farmers' commitment to more sustainable actions
535
00:27:07.160 --> 00:27:10.700
help make Irish dairy a true Irish legend. Always look
536
00:27:10.720 --> 00:27:14.779
for the National Dairy Council guarantee. Learn more at ndc.ie.
537
00:27:15.039 --> 00:27:19.180
Reckon we'll need a fleet of about 50 vehicles next quarter. Oh,
538
00:27:19.599 --> 00:27:21.539
one of our suppliers just pulled out of the market.
539
00:27:21.980 --> 00:27:26.160
Ten should do the job. Nice, just won a new contract.
540
00:27:26.480 --> 00:27:27.039
Make that 100 vehicles.
541
00:27:29.279 --> 00:27:31.259
We had very little time to put the show together.
542
00:27:31.279 --> 00:27:32.380
I mean, it stuns me now that I think by
543
00:27:32.400 --> 00:27:32.660
the time.
544
00:27:55.349 --> 00:27:57.269
By the time I was done doing the affiliates dance
545
00:27:57.309 --> 00:27:59.630
and everything, I think it was June and the show
546
00:27:59.650 --> 00:28:03.359
had to be on the air in September, September 13th
547
00:28:03.380 --> 00:28:06.000
of 1993. It's June. Yeah. And there's just a big
548
00:28:06.099 --> 00:28:09.579
empty space where Dave's studio was and we had no writers.
549
00:28:10.119 --> 00:28:13.359
We had nothing. Right. But I knew Robert and I
550
00:28:13.420 --> 00:28:16.940
will just start, we'll go. And we worked our, we
551
00:28:16.960 --> 00:28:19.619
didn't sleep. We worked like crazy all summer long. It
552
00:28:19.640 --> 00:28:21.480
was the best. It was so, is it?
553
00:28:21.940 --> 00:28:24.579
My dream job. And I was working with you. It
554
00:28:25.039 --> 00:28:26.890
was just like the best guy I could work with.
555
00:28:26.950 --> 00:28:29.029
And I have to confess when he first told me,
556
00:28:29.049 --> 00:28:32.170
and you know, this, you remember the conversation. I'm sure
557
00:28:32.190 --> 00:28:34.390
when you first told me, Lauren wants me to audition.
558
00:28:34.880 --> 00:28:37.019
There was a part of me that was like scared.
559
00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:41.140
Yeah. Hey, guess what? Me too. But I'll remember this
560
00:28:41.220 --> 00:28:44.009
very clearly. You were like, gee, I don't know.
561
00:28:44.089 --> 00:28:47.150
Because if... That's a hard way to break into show business.
562
00:28:47.170 --> 00:28:48.349
That's what I said to you.
563
00:28:48.369 --> 00:28:51.109
It's going to be hard for anybody. The only person
564
00:28:51.150 --> 00:28:53.289
it wouldn't have been hard for is, I think, Gary Shandling.
565
00:28:53.349 --> 00:28:55.450
Gary Shandling was a name they were banking on. And
566
00:28:55.509 --> 00:28:57.009
if he had done it, it would have been absolutely
567
00:28:57.029 --> 00:29:00.259
brilliant from day one. Because he's Gary Shandling. But everyone
568
00:29:00.299 --> 00:29:03.299
else would have taken some knocks for not being Dave.
569
00:29:03.839 --> 00:29:05.960
But I was... going to take a lot of knocks
570
00:29:06.039 --> 00:29:10.380
because complete unknown and no experience. And, um, I remember
571
00:29:10.680 --> 00:29:13.200
so clearly, I remember where I was, I was living
572
00:29:13.240 --> 00:29:16.650
in this little apartment on Weatherly and I had this,
573
00:29:16.750 --> 00:29:19.250
in this tiny little nook, I had a phone and
574
00:29:19.269 --> 00:29:21.089
a phone machine back when you had a phone machine
575
00:29:21.309 --> 00:29:22.880
and I'm talking to you and you're sort of saying,
576
00:29:22.890 --> 00:29:25.279
I'm saying, yeah, like, They're thinking maybe I should audition
577
00:29:25.460 --> 00:29:27.400
because they're looking for the right person. And Lawrence said,
578
00:29:27.420 --> 00:29:29.420
you know, he's got a look and maybe, and Conan's funny.
579
00:29:29.660 --> 00:29:31.680
He's a look and he's very polite and he's got
580
00:29:31.700 --> 00:29:34.910
the hair and the funny first name. And maybe that's
581
00:29:34.970 --> 00:29:38.880
a thing. And so- And he'll be cheap. Oh, trust me.
582
00:29:40.519 --> 00:29:46.819
You'll get him for nothing. And so they- My salary, non-negotiable.
583
00:29:49.680 --> 00:29:53.720
Just because I'm saying you're going to save money on him.
584
00:29:53.779 --> 00:29:58.900
Knock me. So I remember talking to you and you
585
00:29:58.940 --> 00:30:01.940
were rightly, I was shumbly. You were, you were shumbly.
586
00:30:01.960 --> 00:30:04.140
You were saying, yeah, I don't know. I don't know.
587
00:30:04.160 --> 00:30:04.339
I don't.
588
00:30:04.359 --> 00:30:06.059
And then in the back, when I heard like a
589
00:30:06.099 --> 00:30:09.769
Charlie Brown, uh, parent voice go, and I said, what
590
00:30:09.809 --> 00:30:12.069
was that? And you said, well, that was Michelle. Cause
591
00:30:12.220 --> 00:30:13.990
you know, your wife and I, and I, and not
592
00:30:14.029 --> 00:30:16.009
wife at the time, girlfriend at the time, I think.
593
00:30:16.069 --> 00:30:19.099
And you said, um, And she said, and I said,
594
00:30:19.140 --> 00:30:23.019
what's she saying? And she's saying, and you said, Michelle said,
595
00:30:23.059 --> 00:30:26.400
he's got nothing to lose. And then you said, huh,
596
00:30:26.920 --> 00:30:30.109
I think that's kind of true. Like, why not? And
597
00:30:30.140 --> 00:30:32.069
then of course I thought, yeah, I guess I could
598
00:30:32.109 --> 00:30:35.690
be a national joke. But that was the fear the
599
00:30:35.730 --> 00:30:37.990
first year. The fear was the first year was, who's
600
00:30:38.029 --> 00:30:39.730
the famous national joke?
601
00:30:39.890 --> 00:30:42.490
I have to say also that like, so then I
602
00:30:42.549 --> 00:30:44.970
did hesitate a tiny bit. It was like a few
603
00:30:45.009 --> 00:30:47.440
hours later. I was like, wow, man, I don't know, man,
604
00:30:47.500 --> 00:30:49.420
if he can do it. I just, he's never been
605
00:30:49.460 --> 00:30:52.720
on TV. And, and then I just thought to myself,
606
00:30:52.819 --> 00:30:55.279
so like, you know, we both love performing and I
607
00:30:55.299 --> 00:30:57.470
got to do a few things on weekend update.
608
00:30:57.529 --> 00:30:57.869
I did.
609
00:30:58.170 --> 00:31:00.289
And Conan was already with the Simpsons. And I just
610
00:31:00.329 --> 00:31:03.410
remembered like this guy helped me for hours with my
611
00:31:03.609 --> 00:31:07.750
stupid weekend update feature morons perspective. And I'm like, I'm,
612
00:31:07.809 --> 00:31:11.700
I'm hesitating. It's the fucking asshole. And I called you
613
00:31:11.740 --> 00:31:14.099
back and I was like, yeah, yeah. I mean, this
614
00:31:14.180 --> 00:31:15.289
is my, buddy.
615
00:31:15.509 --> 00:31:18.990
But then I, I had, uh, I never once celebrated.
616
00:31:19.049 --> 00:31:21.670
Like I end up, I audition, they think about it
617
00:31:21.710 --> 00:31:23.430
and then they give it to me and, and never,
618
00:31:23.490 --> 00:31:27.000
I was always scared and always filled with the sense
619
00:31:27.039 --> 00:31:30.640
of responsibility. And here it is now over 30 years later.
620
00:31:30.660 --> 00:31:30.740
Yeah.
621
00:31:31.180 --> 00:31:34.039
And I have never once, I don't think I celebrate anything.
622
00:31:34.200 --> 00:31:36.640
I mean, I, I don't, but I just was always like, well,
623
00:31:36.700 --> 00:31:39.359
we'll see. We'll see. And still now I'm 60 and
624
00:31:39.400 --> 00:31:42.890
I'm going, we'll see. We'll see if we'll see how
625
00:31:42.970 --> 00:31:45.880
it happens. But, uh, But I think it was appropriate
626
00:31:45.940 --> 00:31:49.440
not to celebrate getting that show because it was it
627
00:31:49.460 --> 00:31:52.559
was not like getting cast in an amazing role. It
628
00:31:52.640 --> 00:31:54.799
felt to me in a very Catholic way, like this
629
00:31:54.859 --> 00:31:56.319
is a test and you're going to have to walk
630
00:31:56.339 --> 00:32:00.319
through hell. And then that's what happened. That is what happened.
631
00:32:00.460 --> 00:32:01.480
But I remember.
632
00:32:01.759 --> 00:32:04.920
So then he had that audition, which was incredible. I mean,
633
00:32:04.960 --> 00:32:06.700
I guess it was. And then I asked him about
634
00:32:06.720 --> 00:32:08.519
it and he said, well, I had nothing to lose.
635
00:32:09.059 --> 00:32:10.829
And he was like in front of I don't know
636
00:32:10.869 --> 00:32:11.960
how many people were in that room.
637
00:32:12.579 --> 00:32:15.009
I don't know. It was a tiny, no, it was a,
638
00:32:15.049 --> 00:32:16.930
that was a good size. I don't know. A hundred people.
639
00:32:16.970 --> 00:32:17.250
Yeah.
640
00:32:17.349 --> 00:32:17.890
Yeah. Yeah.
641
00:32:17.930 --> 00:32:20.869
And he interviewed Jason Alexander and Mimi Rogers and his
642
00:32:20.930 --> 00:32:25.000
Mimi Rogers interview was just like professional hysterical. And then
643
00:32:25.019 --> 00:32:27.140
I just turned on a dime. I was like, this
644
00:32:27.180 --> 00:32:30.099
guy's going to be enormous. And then he was so
645
00:32:30.299 --> 00:32:33.569
funny and hilarious and, when we assembled writers, we all
646
00:32:33.609 --> 00:32:38.950
got incredibly overconfident. We're like, everybody's going to have a
647
00:32:38.990 --> 00:32:40.599
pompadour within six months.
648
00:32:41.859 --> 00:32:44.960
I really believe this. I was like, everybody's going to
649
00:32:44.980 --> 00:32:50.670
want to have long skinny pants. I was positive. Everyone's
650
00:32:50.690 --> 00:32:53.289
going to be one to have kind of like ambivalent,
651
00:32:53.390 --> 00:32:59.150
ambiguous gender. He's kind of a guy, but also a
652
00:32:59.170 --> 00:33:00.049
little bit of a girl.
653
00:33:00.470 --> 00:33:03.670
For his, he stayed nervous, but the rest of us
654
00:33:03.710 --> 00:33:06.680
were so confident. And it was great because it made
655
00:33:06.759 --> 00:33:11.059
us try everything. We were fearless. We tried every idea.
656
00:33:11.220 --> 00:33:14.710
And obviously some went to shit, but And still the
657
00:33:14.730 --> 00:33:18.309
proudest achievement of my whole career easily is how much
658
00:33:18.390 --> 00:33:19.710
stuff we did generate.
659
00:33:19.849 --> 00:33:21.769
If you look at the first two years, that's the
660
00:33:21.809 --> 00:33:24.029
thing that I'm stunned. Well, even if you looked at
661
00:33:24.049 --> 00:33:26.930
the first three weeks, there's so much material that you
662
00:33:26.970 --> 00:33:28.299
did forever. Yeah.
663
00:33:28.440 --> 00:33:29.680
On the late night show.
664
00:33:29.720 --> 00:33:33.319
We did the clutch cargo in the year 2000, actual items.
665
00:33:33.440 --> 00:33:36.059
There's so many things that, but then we kept building
666
00:33:36.140 --> 00:33:39.819
on that. We never stopped trying to try new things.
667
00:33:39.940 --> 00:33:43.910
And I remember doing, People used to, who were in
668
00:33:43.930 --> 00:33:46.619
the business would say, I mean, I remember even David
669
00:33:46.640 --> 00:33:49.539
Letterman saying, that's insane. Because we would, we were basically
670
00:33:49.559 --> 00:33:52.579
trying to do Saturday Night Live every night. Yes, which is.
671
00:33:52.660 --> 00:33:55.400
Which is impossible. And then finally you could smell the
672
00:33:55.460 --> 00:33:59.369
smoke of like the gears grinding. Yes. People going insane.
673
00:33:59.430 --> 00:34:00.269
No one's sleeping.
674
00:34:00.309 --> 00:34:02.589
It's funny because like so many, I think I've told
675
00:34:02.630 --> 00:34:04.630
you this story. So like in 19, and it was
676
00:34:04.769 --> 00:34:07.529
a lot of it stemmed from people on the staff
677
00:34:07.569 --> 00:34:09.550
who just didn't believe in us. Some people, a lot,
678
00:34:09.610 --> 00:34:12.659
some people really believed, you know, like Frank's back there
679
00:34:12.699 --> 00:34:17.159
and Paula and, and, um, but then, uh, you know, like,
680
00:34:17.300 --> 00:34:18.599
so in 1999 or 90 or 2009, I visited the
681
00:34:18.619 --> 00:34:19.059
Fallon set.
682
00:34:19.079 --> 00:34:19.500
Mm-hmm.
683
00:34:22.960 --> 00:34:25.429
And yeah, because back then, when we did it, people
684
00:34:25.469 --> 00:34:28.789
were like, it's every night live we're doing over here.
685
00:34:28.809 --> 00:34:31.969
And I visited the Fallon set and everybody was like
686
00:34:32.050 --> 00:34:35.289
all perky and happy. And they were doing really ambitious
687
00:34:35.349 --> 00:34:37.219
shit when he first started in late night. They were
688
00:34:37.239 --> 00:34:38.940
doing all these detailed film pieces.
689
00:34:39.480 --> 00:34:40.420
And literally.
690
00:34:40.929 --> 00:34:43.030
crew member said to me it's like every.
691
00:34:42.869 --> 00:34:47.070
Night live they were super excited about because jimmy had
692
00:34:47.090 --> 00:34:50.090
been on television for like 10 years yeah it's it's
693
00:34:50.159 --> 00:34:52.679
interesting you said one thing i wanted to bring up
694
00:34:52.760 --> 00:34:56.980
was uh last year we lost uh one of the
695
00:34:57.019 --> 00:34:59.460
most important people that ever worked on the show bill.
696
00:34:59.300 --> 00:35:03.139
Tall yes bill tall was a legendary prop master who
697
00:35:03.179 --> 00:35:05.730
looked to see if you want a visual bill tall
698
00:35:06.469 --> 00:35:08.329
started with us and was with us for years and
699
00:35:08.349 --> 00:35:11.460
years and years and years and bill tall looked like
700
00:35:11.739 --> 00:35:17.320
a Nordic God. I mean, very tall, incredible build, incredibly
701
00:35:17.360 --> 00:35:20.699
handsome face. Yeah. And then we started using him in sketches.
702
00:35:20.739 --> 00:35:22.690
So you might be, you could look him up later on. Yeah.
703
00:35:22.730 --> 00:35:27.110
Later on. But long, long white hair. Yeah. And he
704
00:35:27.530 --> 00:35:29.070
looked like he could, you could put him in a
705
00:35:29.170 --> 00:35:32.570
Thor costume and he could say, you trespass here. I mean,
706
00:35:32.590 --> 00:35:34.309
he had that amazing voice too.
707
00:35:34.349 --> 00:35:34.489
Yeah.
708
00:35:34.889 --> 00:35:37.219
But he would do anything. He would do anything.
709
00:35:37.659 --> 00:35:41.090
And at that point in the show, like, you know,
710
00:35:41.190 --> 00:35:43.409
sometimes it felt like we were almost at war because
711
00:35:43.449 --> 00:35:45.500
there were people on the staff who just were like,
712
00:35:45.679 --> 00:35:49.300
why are we doing this fucking key screen behind the
713
00:35:49.380 --> 00:35:51.519
band or whatever weird thing we were trying all this
714
00:35:51.559 --> 00:35:54.260
weird stuff, trying all this stuff. And then there were
715
00:35:54.300 --> 00:35:57.429
people like Frank, like who would do anything and Kate
716
00:35:57.489 --> 00:36:00.429
and think of ID. I got something for Alex Rocco.
717
00:36:00.449 --> 00:36:04.510
You're going to love it, whatever. I remember I'll just
718
00:36:04.550 --> 00:36:07.869
tell one quick bill story. Like, so we, when the
719
00:36:07.929 --> 00:36:10.659
Rangers won the Stanley Cup in 1994. And so I
720
00:36:10.699 --> 00:36:12.980
had this idea to have like a dancing or running
721
00:36:13.019 --> 00:36:16.579
around Stanley Cup, like a live Stanley because anthropomorphize.
722
00:36:16.780 --> 00:36:20.079
Yeah. Yeah. The Stanley Cup has come to life and
723
00:36:20.119 --> 00:36:21.340
is dancing around in our studio.
724
00:36:21.380 --> 00:36:24.949
And of course, because I was, you know, a big baby,
725
00:36:25.289 --> 00:36:28.309
I wanted the giant Stanley Cup, but to have like
726
00:36:28.369 --> 00:36:31.719
tighty whities visible and, at the bottom, so the legs
727
00:36:31.780 --> 00:36:34.349
are really cute, but he's wearing tighty whities and it's
728
00:36:34.389 --> 00:36:38.190
kind of disturbing. But I had this idea literally at
729
00:36:38.250 --> 00:36:41.030
like two in the morning and like Brian Leach from
730
00:36:41.050 --> 00:36:43.190
the Rangers was gonna be on the show the next day.
731
00:36:43.730 --> 00:36:46.090
And so I call, you know, and the writers were
732
00:36:46.110 --> 00:36:49.190
all there laughing about this and I call like the
733
00:36:49.230 --> 00:36:51.969
wardrobe department and they're like, what the fuck.
734
00:36:51.809 --> 00:36:53.909
Are you talking about? That's not gonna happen. You can't
735
00:36:53.949 --> 00:36:54.329
do that.
736
00:36:54.750 --> 00:36:57.420
Then I call Bill Tull. He's like, okay, yeah, okay.
737
00:36:57.460 --> 00:36:59.500
So we'll, yeah, you want me to build like a
738
00:36:59.619 --> 00:37:01.880
whole thing? Okay, so it's like eight, how many levels
739
00:37:01.949 --> 00:37:03.989
are there? And it's like three in the morning. And
740
00:37:04.070 --> 00:37:05.949
so he gets right to work. And then the only
741
00:37:05.989 --> 00:37:08.769
thing that he can't figure out is the Stanley Cup
742
00:37:08.789 --> 00:37:11.510
has like this bowl, this big silver bowl on top.
743
00:37:11.750 --> 00:37:14.570
So Bill Tull calls the rainbow room, finds out that
744
00:37:14.610 --> 00:37:15.699
they have a silver bowl.
745
00:37:15.719 --> 00:37:19.059
He goes up there, which is by the way, For
746
00:37:19.079 --> 00:37:22.519
anyone who doesn't know, one of the most swanky- Swanky, yes.
747
00:37:22.579 --> 00:37:26.300
Like incredible, elite places. Rich people have their weddings in
748
00:37:26.320 --> 00:37:28.969
the rainbow room. So he goes to the rainbow room.
749
00:37:29.010 --> 00:37:30.929
He goes to the rainbow room.
750
00:37:30.969 --> 00:37:32.590
Hey, you guys got a silver bowl? I need it
751
00:37:32.610 --> 00:37:37.250
for a guy wearing underwear. A Stanley Cup thing. And
752
00:37:37.289 --> 00:37:39.849
so the guy, he gets the manager of the place
753
00:37:39.889 --> 00:37:41.809
and like, well, we kind of need that bowl. Listen,
754
00:37:41.849 --> 00:37:44.510
what can I do? How can I get the silver bowl?
755
00:37:44.590 --> 00:37:48.320
And literally, the guy says, well, there's a kind of
756
00:37:48.380 --> 00:37:52.840
hot security guard downstairs. And if you can get me
757
00:37:52.900 --> 00:37:55.800
her number, set me up so I can call her.
758
00:37:56.320 --> 00:37:58.820
I'll give you the bowl. So he goes down to
759
00:37:58.840 --> 00:37:59.510
the ground floor.
760
00:37:59.530 --> 00:38:00.030
Of course he does.
761
00:38:00.289 --> 00:38:03.050
Talks to the security guard lady. Says, there's a guy
762
00:38:03.070 --> 00:38:06.250
in the rainbow room. And he gets the number. And
763
00:38:06.289 --> 00:38:09.719
he goes back upstairs. and comes back with the bowl.
764
00:38:09.739 --> 00:38:11.599
And this is like on no sleep.
765
00:38:11.639 --> 00:38:14.219
No sleep. Unbelievable. And the whole point is.
766
00:38:14.179 --> 00:38:16.730
That like- That was the spirit of the show. That
767
00:38:16.750 --> 00:38:19.650
was the spirit of the show. And like, Chilemi's here
768
00:38:20.090 --> 00:38:21.570
another long time.
769
00:38:22.090 --> 00:38:25.409
I call Chills the warrior. Yeah. Because he's still- I
770
00:38:25.449 --> 00:38:27.710
shoot things now, I'm in different countries for this thing
771
00:38:27.750 --> 00:38:29.269
I'm doing for HBO Max and who's there? Yeah, he's
772
00:38:29.289 --> 00:38:32.610
another one. Chills, he was there. Yeah, he gets it.
773
00:38:32.800 --> 00:38:35.050
But one of the things was really, I'll say this
774
00:38:35.110 --> 00:38:37.320
and then we have so much to talk about. I'm sorry. No,
775
00:38:37.340 --> 00:38:39.679
but we were always, no, no, sorry. We were always,
776
00:38:39.840 --> 00:38:41.360
this is just gonna have to be a seven hour episode,
777
00:38:41.380 --> 00:38:44.059
but this is what I remember about Bill Tull was
778
00:38:44.079 --> 00:38:47.739
we needed some kind of crazy looking thing that basically
779
00:38:47.780 --> 00:38:49.980
was gonna look like an animal skeleton, but it had
780
00:38:50.019 --> 00:38:53.099
a clock for a head or something. And so at rehearsal,
781
00:38:53.380 --> 00:38:56.070
they reveal this thing and it looks kind of perfect.
782
00:38:56.329 --> 00:39:00.329
And I'm like, wow, how did you fake this animal skeleton?
783
00:39:00.570 --> 00:39:04.099
And Bill's like, oh yeah, well I went upstate New York.
784
00:39:04.159 --> 00:39:06.159
I knew a guy who, he has a farm and
785
00:39:06.179 --> 00:39:08.880
he told me where all the animals are buried. So
786
00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:11.760
he went out at night with a shovel and dug
787
00:39:11.780 --> 00:39:15.260
around until he found a dead sheep and he dug
788
00:39:15.340 --> 00:39:19.699
up all the bones and reassembled it for the prop.
789
00:39:19.719 --> 00:39:23.070
Just beyond belief. I mean, literally he's a ghoul in
790
00:39:23.090 --> 00:39:26.210
the night. You know, the giant moon behind him and
791
00:39:26.230 --> 00:39:29.670
a silhouette of him digging and then assembling bones.
792
00:39:29.920 --> 00:39:33.219
And then he just talks about this matter-of-factly on, it's
793
00:39:33.260 --> 00:39:35.619
the best episode of Inside Conan. You should listen to it.
794
00:39:35.860 --> 00:39:38.199
Bill and his partner, John Rao. And, you know, the
795
00:39:38.219 --> 00:39:40.960
whole point is that, like, it was such a struggle
796
00:39:41.019 --> 00:39:43.519
that first year. It was the best job, most exciting
797
00:39:43.559 --> 00:39:46.139
job I ever had, but it was such a struggle.
798
00:39:46.159 --> 00:39:47.570
The network doubting us.
799
00:39:48.429 --> 00:39:50.920
You know what I remembered very clearly? If there are
800
00:39:50.980 --> 00:39:53.800
five things you need to have a successful television show,
801
00:39:54.389 --> 00:39:58.530
meaning the networks behind you, the critics like you.
802
00:39:58.550 --> 00:39:58.630
Yeah.
803
00:39:59.010 --> 00:40:00.880
The numbers are strong, and then like a couple of
804
00:40:00.900 --> 00:40:04.659
other things. We had none of those things. We had absolutely,
805
00:40:04.679 --> 00:40:07.760
I remembered sitting around going, let's see, what are the
806
00:40:07.780 --> 00:40:09.699
things you need? And then making a list of the
807
00:40:09.760 --> 00:40:12.710
five and going, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope.
808
00:40:13.130 --> 00:40:15.309
All we had was a great show. We did have
809
00:40:15.329 --> 00:40:16.230
a great host.
810
00:40:16.289 --> 00:40:19.110
And a great sidekick. You know what was really nice
811
00:40:19.170 --> 00:40:21.409
was that we made it to that first summer and
812
00:40:21.469 --> 00:40:24.030
suddenly colleges got out. Yeah. And all of a sudden
813
00:40:24.619 --> 00:40:26.780
we had these audiences that were fine. And if we
814
00:40:26.800 --> 00:40:28.900
did something really funny, they would laugh. But it was
815
00:40:28.980 --> 00:40:32.409
always touch and go. And then suddenly I walked out.
816
00:40:32.429 --> 00:40:36.610
It would have been June of 1994 after this slog,
817
00:40:37.230 --> 00:40:40.650
this crazy slog, which started the summer before and went
818
00:40:40.860 --> 00:40:42.340
all the way into the following summer. So it was
819
00:40:42.380 --> 00:40:46.179
a solid year of no sleeping, always worrying. people on
820
00:40:46.199 --> 00:40:50.139
the street telling me to drop dead. Oh, my God.
821
00:40:50.639 --> 00:40:51.780
Those were network executives.
822
00:40:51.880 --> 00:40:57.699
I thought it was bad form. They were worried I
823
00:40:57.739 --> 00:41:00.969
didn't get the message. It'll make him stronger. It's okay.
824
00:41:01.949 --> 00:41:04.110
He's over there. He's in Central Park South.
825
00:41:04.409 --> 00:41:04.710
Get him.
826
00:41:05.530 --> 00:41:08.610
Thanks, Lorne. No problem. It'll toughen him up. Now about
827
00:41:08.650 --> 00:41:13.559
my money. Okay. My getaway car needs a better driver.
828
00:41:13.579 --> 00:41:16.820
But I remember that walking out one day to do
829
00:41:16.840 --> 00:41:18.699
the warmup because I would do the warmup before the show.
830
00:41:19.000 --> 00:41:21.260
And I came out to do the warmup and the
831
00:41:21.280 --> 00:41:23.900
minute the crowd saw me, they were, yes. Yeah.
832
00:41:23.960 --> 00:41:24.780
Whoa.
833
00:41:24.960 --> 00:41:28.409
And I was looking behind me like, is Jerry Seinfeld
834
00:41:28.449 --> 00:41:32.730
standing behind me? What's happening? This was, it was really spectacular.
835
00:41:32.750 --> 00:41:33.650
This is interesting.
836
00:41:34.389 --> 00:41:37.690
All these people who were criticizing you, I realize now,
837
00:41:38.110 --> 00:41:40.550
they were not the audience, but they were, well, we
838
00:41:40.590 --> 00:41:42.949
did have Dave who came on to the show.
839
00:41:42.989 --> 00:41:45.670
Yeah. That was the biggest thing that ever happened.
840
00:41:45.710 --> 00:41:45.909
Yeah.
841
00:41:45.929 --> 00:41:48.349
That was February of 94. That was huge. Yes.
842
00:41:48.469 --> 00:41:50.630
And he had the, he said it backstage and then
843
00:41:50.650 --> 00:41:52.670
he said it to your face, which is what really
844
00:41:52.710 --> 00:41:55.050
mattered on television, how great the show was.
845
00:41:55.070 --> 00:41:55.369
Yeah.
846
00:41:55.690 --> 00:41:57.590
And that changed a lot of, took a lot of
847
00:41:57.610 --> 00:41:58.969
pressure off of that. But the last thing I want
848
00:41:58.989 --> 00:42:02.030
to say about Bill, just in general, Bill Tull, Bill Tull,
849
00:42:02.190 --> 00:42:04.929
just that like for people who work on a show
850
00:42:04.969 --> 00:42:08.280
like this or any movie set, you could have the
851
00:42:08.619 --> 00:42:13.019
opinion that, you know, my job's not that important. There's
852
00:42:13.059 --> 00:42:15.510
a finite amount of effect that I can have on
853
00:42:15.550 --> 00:42:19.769
a show, but like, it's not true. If people are
854
00:42:20.349 --> 00:42:23.630
supportive of the creative people at the top and they
855
00:42:23.650 --> 00:42:26.289
give off that vibe that they believe in you and
856
00:42:26.329 --> 00:42:28.690
that they'll do anything for you, like Bill and other
857
00:42:28.730 --> 00:42:32.369
people from that staff, it makes an enormous difference.
858
00:42:32.389 --> 00:42:35.449
Yeah, and I'd say, you know, and not to embarrass
859
00:42:35.469 --> 00:42:37.389
him because I know he's right outside this door because
860
00:42:37.429 --> 00:42:39.989
he still works with us, but, you know, Jason Shalemi,
861
00:42:40.449 --> 00:42:42.510
who you mentioned, is the same kind of person who
862
00:42:42.530 --> 00:42:45.170
started with us as an intern. But I swear to God,
863
00:42:45.230 --> 00:42:48.289
if Jason thought it was, if he sensed that it
864
00:42:48.329 --> 00:42:51.789
was important for us doing something comedically, whether it's now
865
00:42:51.849 --> 00:42:53.969
for the podcast or for a travel show I'm doing
866
00:42:53.989 --> 00:42:56.949
for HBO Max, whatever, and it involved him getting shot at.
867
00:42:56.969 --> 00:42:58.300
It's just Max now. Yeah.
868
00:42:58.429 --> 00:42:59.300
Oh, it's a program.
869
00:42:59.360 --> 00:43:01.840
Okay, whatever. I like to throw the HBO in to
870
00:43:01.860 --> 00:43:07.150
let people know that it's actually quality. That it's not pornography.
871
00:43:07.409 --> 00:43:09.989
When you just say Max, people think, oh, well, it's
872
00:43:10.010 --> 00:43:12.039
people fucking, I guess. So I can whack off to this?
873
00:43:12.059 --> 00:43:12.280
Yeah.
874
00:43:12.480 --> 00:43:14.119
I've never been able to whack off to Conan. This
875
00:43:14.179 --> 00:43:18.599
is exciting. He's really evolved, like they say. His porn
876
00:43:18.659 --> 00:43:23.070
is so creative. All the furniture in the room is
877
00:43:23.130 --> 00:43:27.010
talking too. The guy and the girl are going at
878
00:43:27.050 --> 00:43:32.719
it and then the couch is like, yeah, what a schlong. Quiet, couchy.
879
00:43:32.820 --> 00:43:36.469
I'm losing my concentration. I like that.
880
00:43:36.550 --> 00:43:38.630
Porn with anthropomorphic props.
881
00:43:39.030 --> 00:43:41.389
Wow, he's really giving it to her. Shut up, alarm clock.
882
00:43:41.630 --> 00:43:45.219
The pizza's watching. The pizza's rubbing its pepperoni nipples.
883
00:43:45.699 --> 00:43:47.320
Oh, I.
884
00:43:49.039 --> 00:43:52.059
Love it. New meaning to the word food porn. Yeah, exactly.
885
00:43:53.510 --> 00:43:56.610
But no, if Jason thought it was important, and I
886
00:43:56.610 --> 00:43:59.010
was just with him, we were shooting in South America,
887
00:43:59.070 --> 00:44:01.090
and he's like, I think if he thought this was
888
00:44:01.260 --> 00:44:03.440
important to me or somehow important to the comedy, but
889
00:44:03.460 --> 00:44:06.659
it involved him running across a firing line where actual
890
00:44:06.719 --> 00:44:09.239
ammunition's being shot, he would do it. Which is my point,
891
00:44:09.280 --> 00:44:12.440
is that he's stupid. No. He's a moron. He's complete. No,
892
00:44:12.659 --> 00:44:13.820
my point is that it's.
893
00:44:13.880 --> 00:44:16.739
He makes you, like the last day I was on
894
00:44:16.780 --> 00:44:18.659
the show, I had to give a speech, which was
895
00:44:18.940 --> 00:44:21.500
painful as can be, because I loved the show so much.
896
00:44:21.639 --> 00:44:24.780
And I remember saying, I thanked everybody. And I said,
897
00:44:24.820 --> 00:44:26.969
there are people in this room who have said Conan
898
00:44:27.010 --> 00:44:30.090
and I have inspired them to do great work. And
899
00:44:30.369 --> 00:44:34.289
I just wanted to tell everybody you, you inspired us.
900
00:44:34.670 --> 00:44:37.389
And that's really true. A guy like Jason, a guy
901
00:44:37.429 --> 00:44:41.150
like Bill, they have your back and it's makes all
902
00:44:41.190 --> 00:44:42.170
the difference in the world.
903
00:44:42.429 --> 00:44:44.809
And I do think in light of it's, it's a
904
00:44:45.030 --> 00:44:48.139
great message too, that people, you know, in the light
905
00:44:48.159 --> 00:44:49.960
of all these strikes and everything, and people say, well,
906
00:44:49.980 --> 00:44:53.269
it just comes down to commerce and money and, Yes,
907
00:44:53.429 --> 00:44:55.780
is money part of it? Of course it is. But
908
00:44:56.530 --> 00:45:00.539
when you see the level of, when people get excited
909
00:45:00.639 --> 00:45:05.380
creatively and then other people around them, whether it's people
910
00:45:05.420 --> 00:45:09.539
working cameras, pulling cables, but they're excited too and they're
911
00:45:09.679 --> 00:45:11.900
kind of going the extra mile to make it happen.
912
00:45:11.920 --> 00:45:15.239
Makes such a difference. And then it becomes kind of
913
00:45:15.320 --> 00:45:17.639
like a religious experience in a weird way. It becomes
914
00:45:17.699 --> 00:45:21.369
spiritual and you're making something And then you get the money.
915
00:45:22.429 --> 00:45:32.820
And you don't share it with anybody. Maybe.
916
00:45:32.860 --> 00:45:37.019
Now you're making me think about Jason's predecessor, Mr. Jordan Slansky,
917
00:45:37.760 --> 00:45:41.079
who I always credit. Triumph remotes wouldn't exist if it
918
00:45:41.119 --> 00:45:43.780
wasn't for Jordan. Because the first time we did one,
919
00:45:44.079 --> 00:45:44.800
we were never.
920
00:45:44.739 --> 00:45:45.699
Going to get it. Well, let me back it up
921
00:45:45.719 --> 00:45:49.840
just a little before, which is Triumph comes out of
922
00:45:50.000 --> 00:45:53.409
this sketch you're doing on the show. Right, Westminster. And
923
00:45:53.429 --> 00:45:56.469
you come in with this dog whose talent is he's
924
00:45:56.489 --> 00:45:59.630
an insult comic. Yes. And then I think what we
925
00:45:59.690 --> 00:46:01.909
have to do, which I have to give you credit for,
926
00:46:02.530 --> 00:46:06.690
two things. The choice of the puppet is exceptional. And
927
00:46:07.369 --> 00:46:09.510
like I say, the fact that the puppets has kind
928
00:46:09.550 --> 00:46:13.769
of a realistic face, but the eyes are dead. And
929
00:46:13.809 --> 00:46:16.110
so he says these jokes and stares. And I think,
930
00:46:17.190 --> 00:46:19.840
not unlike why I often found Norm MacDonald so funny,
931
00:46:19.909 --> 00:46:22.300
is Norm could make his eyes go dead and just
932
00:46:22.340 --> 00:46:24.179
kind of stare at you after he said a joke.
933
00:46:24.760 --> 00:46:27.480
And I do think that Triumph has that, I look
934
00:46:27.500 --> 00:46:29.920
into those puppet eyes and I can watch it forever.
935
00:46:30.659 --> 00:46:35.110
But the other thing is the voice. Because anybody else
936
00:46:35.369 --> 00:46:37.110
doing it who had that idea of, oh yeah, it's
937
00:46:37.150 --> 00:46:41.949
a dog who's an insult comic, would have done Borscht Belt. Hey,
938
00:46:41.969 --> 00:46:45.510
you over there. What are you, sock? You know, Armenia. Hey, well, Armenia,
939
00:46:45.530 --> 00:46:48.420
is that even a country? Sounds like a tiny diarrhea.
940
00:46:48.480 --> 00:46:48.780
You know?
941
00:46:49.360 --> 00:46:49.820
What?
942
00:46:49.840 --> 00:46:52.139
That's a good one. No, don't write it down. Yeah,
943
00:46:52.159 --> 00:46:55.980
it's really good. Armenia, diarrhea. Side of. Yeah, but anyway,
944
00:46:56.860 --> 00:46:59.610
what I'm saying is that's what anybody else would have done.
945
00:47:00.230 --> 00:47:04.460
Robert is the only person I know who would have done,
946
00:47:04.480 --> 00:47:08.820
I think it's an old Russian Jewish woman. Am I correct?
947
00:47:09.380 --> 00:47:13.519
I had grandparents that were first generation immigrants, you know,
948
00:47:13.539 --> 00:47:18.139
who escaped Russia during, and they actually emigrated to China first.
949
00:47:18.179 --> 00:47:22.059
They'd be so proud of what you've done. We must
950
00:47:22.159 --> 00:47:23.619
escape persecution.
951
00:47:23.659 --> 00:47:28.530
So that future generations may be able to watch, to
952
00:47:28.570 --> 00:47:32.769
witness a realistic looking puppet have sex with a live animal.
953
00:47:35.130 --> 00:47:39.650
On television. Yes, oh yes. What is this television?
954
00:47:39.989 --> 00:47:44.610
Well, it's going to be a thing starting with Milton Berle.
955
00:47:45.130 --> 00:47:48.210
They're trying to kill us, but if we can escape,
956
00:47:48.230 --> 00:47:53.510
then one, maybe one of our grandchildren will contribute. Will
957
00:47:53.530 --> 00:47:55.610
turn us into a horny puppet.
958
00:47:56.610 --> 00:47:59.820
I have to credit my wife, because she's the one who,
959
00:48:00.239 --> 00:48:03.949
so I found triumph on this rack of, whimsical puppets
960
00:48:04.070 --> 00:48:06.929
that were when we were shooting, when we were newlyweds
961
00:48:06.989 --> 00:48:09.469
and we were hunting for furniture at a country store.
962
00:48:09.820 --> 00:48:11.940
And we saw this and the puppet was so funny
963
00:48:12.000 --> 00:48:14.099
to me, these dog puppets, and there was a sheep
964
00:48:14.159 --> 00:48:16.639
and a cat. So I immediately put on one of
965
00:48:16.659 --> 00:48:20.039
the dog puppets, sniffed her ass with it in the,
966
00:48:20.500 --> 00:48:23.239
in the room, in the, in the furniture store. And
967
00:48:23.260 --> 00:48:25.849
of course she found it funny because she's the perfect
968
00:48:25.889 --> 00:48:29.190
woman for me. And then she surprised me like in February,
969
00:48:29.230 --> 00:48:31.780
like two months later after we were married, with like
970
00:48:31.840 --> 00:48:33.960
seven of these puppets. And that's what gave me the
971
00:48:34.039 --> 00:48:37.139
idea for this Westminster thing. And like Dave was having
972
00:48:37.179 --> 00:48:39.119
Westminster dogs run up and down the aisles of the
973
00:48:39.179 --> 00:48:42.539
Ed Sullivan Theater. Very Dave, very found humor. And I
974
00:48:42.559 --> 00:48:44.840
was like, so- Our version of that. Our version is
975
00:48:44.900 --> 00:48:45.400
make it up.
976
00:48:45.480 --> 00:48:49.760
Yeah. Yeah. So that's- Well, so I remember that, and
977
00:48:49.780 --> 00:48:53.239
then I remember early on before there were remotes, we'd
978
00:48:53.260 --> 00:48:57.329
have guests on and Triumph would roast them. Yes. We
979
00:48:57.349 --> 00:48:59.809
would always- It's like catharsis for the audience. Yeah. And-
980
00:49:01.000 --> 00:49:03.900
So Triumph would be over behind this little stand. And
981
00:49:04.619 --> 00:49:07.119
I would have interviewed the guest already. And then they
982
00:49:07.139 --> 00:49:10.139
go after the guest. And I'll never forget, guests would
983
00:49:10.179 --> 00:49:13.190
say yes to it, not knowing what it was. Simon
984
00:49:13.230 --> 00:49:17.030
Cowell is on. It's the height of- The first couple
985
00:49:17.050 --> 00:49:18.650
of years of American Idol. Maybe the first year of
986
00:49:19.090 --> 00:49:21.489
American Idol. He was like, the biggest thing. He was huge.
987
00:49:21.550 --> 00:49:23.449
He was huge. And he comes on the show and
988
00:49:23.699 --> 00:49:25.320
we said, do you mind? And he went, oh no,
989
00:49:25.539 --> 00:49:28.239
you know, please, whatever it is you chaps do, go ahead.
990
00:49:28.750 --> 00:49:32.690
I'll just be here with my too tight t-shirt. And
991
00:49:32.710 --> 00:49:35.760
so you're ripping into him and he's watching. And then
992
00:49:35.840 --> 00:49:37.480
when it's over, I say, we'll take a break. We'll
993
00:49:37.500 --> 00:49:39.159
be right back. And he turns to me and he's
994
00:49:39.300 --> 00:49:42.099
covered in sweat. He was covered in sweat. And he said,
995
00:49:42.519 --> 00:49:47.320
that was rough. Like a guy who had just been
996
00:49:47.440 --> 00:49:48.739
beaten with a stick. So funny.
997
00:49:48.760 --> 00:49:50.929
And then later I saw him afterward and I was like,
998
00:49:50.949 --> 00:49:53.789
was that okay? And he had come to understand by then.
999
00:49:53.829 --> 00:49:55.230
He was like, no, this is.
1000
00:49:56.019 --> 00:49:59.360
This would be good for me in some way would
1001
00:49:59.380 --> 00:50:02.840
be able to show that I can laugh at myself.
1002
00:50:03.699 --> 00:50:05.820
And blood came out of his, a tear with blood
1003
00:50:05.880 --> 00:50:09.199
in it. But then you go to do a remote
1004
00:50:09.440 --> 00:50:11.960
Westminster dog show. And of course, I think Chalemi goes
1005
00:50:12.019 --> 00:50:13.119
with you. No, it was that.
1006
00:50:13.300 --> 00:50:16.070
The first one was Jordan, was Jordan. And we couldn't
1007
00:50:16.110 --> 00:50:19.190
get in first because apparently Andy had done something at
1008
00:50:19.250 --> 00:50:21.750
Westminster that they didn't like. So they weren't going to
1009
00:50:21.789 --> 00:50:23.570
let us in. And I was like, okay, I guess
1010
00:50:23.590 --> 00:50:25.199
we'll never do it. And if I'd never done it,
1011
00:50:25.369 --> 00:50:27.050
maybe I would have never done a remote because that
1012
00:50:27.090 --> 00:50:29.820
was the obvious one to do. Sweeney suggested, why don't
1013
00:50:29.840 --> 00:50:32.559
you go to Westminster and hit on these dogs?
1014
00:50:33.679 --> 00:50:35.139
Hump real dogs.
1015
00:50:35.159 --> 00:50:37.619
Yeah, because I'd been sort of doing it on the show,
1016
00:50:38.199 --> 00:50:40.679
but here's all these dogs and I loved it. So
1017
00:50:40.719 --> 00:50:45.000
then Jordan creates this scam. He printed out all these
1018
00:50:45.079 --> 00:50:47.460
fake NBC passes. He broke the law. He broke the
1019
00:50:47.500 --> 00:50:50.460
law and he figured out a side entrance and he said,
1020
00:50:50.500 --> 00:50:53.539
it's not technically illegal, it's not technically deception because we
1021
00:50:53.599 --> 00:50:57.840
actually are NBC employees, you know, it's very Jordan rationalization,
1022
00:50:57.960 --> 00:51:01.539
but we got in and it's all because of him
1023
00:51:01.679 --> 00:51:03.400
that these remotes exist.
1024
00:51:03.579 --> 00:51:06.730
We tip our cap now to a man. I professionally loathe.
1025
00:51:08.670 --> 00:51:13.130
I've made a career, a fifth career out of being
1026
00:51:13.170 --> 00:51:16.289
irritated by Jordan Slansky. But, but no, in, in real life,
1027
00:51:16.389 --> 00:51:19.989
he saved the day. And then, you know, remotes come
1028
00:51:20.170 --> 00:51:23.510
fast and furious and then the iconic crazy Star Wars
1029
00:51:23.550 --> 00:51:26.380
remote where there's not, it was all still again before
1030
00:51:26.420 --> 00:51:29.019
the internet, like things couldn't go viral. But I remember
1031
00:51:29.059 --> 00:51:31.639
the night we played that, the audience screaming and going
1032
00:51:31.719 --> 00:51:34.300
wild and thinking, there's only some way this can be
1033
00:51:34.360 --> 00:51:37.920
replayed for everybody throughout all time. And fortunately now there is.
1034
00:51:38.119 --> 00:51:40.659
No, but actually it was the first thing on the
1035
00:51:40.719 --> 00:51:43.800
show that did, because before YouTube, there was something called iFilm.
1036
00:51:43.909 --> 00:51:47.019
Blair will know this because he's Pathetic nerd, right? Yes,
1037
00:51:47.039 --> 00:51:48.360
that's true. Okay.
1038
00:51:48.380 --> 00:51:51.269
That is why everybody even knew it back then. It
1039
00:51:51.329 --> 00:51:53.690
was the first thing on the show that was like
1040
00:51:53.969 --> 00:51:57.690
put on iFilm or whatever it was called. And it
1041
00:51:57.730 --> 00:52:00.849
was the happiest experience I ever had doing Triumph because
1042
00:52:00.949 --> 00:52:05.440
everybody was like, I don't really like making people unhappy.
1043
00:52:05.719 --> 00:52:08.639
I know it's good television sometimes, especially if it's like
1044
00:52:08.679 --> 00:52:11.739
a person nobody likes, but it's so much more fun.
1045
00:52:11.820 --> 00:52:13.059
These guys were fans of you.
1046
00:52:13.469 --> 00:52:15.889
Yeah. And they knew what Triumph was. I think what
1047
00:52:15.929 --> 00:52:18.260
makes it... It was like they wanted to meet Triumph.
1048
00:52:18.340 --> 00:52:20.059
And it was like when I met Don Rickles. What
1049
00:52:20.099 --> 00:52:23.780
makes it so nice is that... Because I'm the same way.
1050
00:52:23.840 --> 00:52:27.340
If I think I've hurt someone's feelings... Yeah. I don't
1051
00:52:27.480 --> 00:52:29.820
sleep for like two days. If I think they really got,
1052
00:52:30.000 --> 00:52:33.570
you know. And so I'm just saying that to appear nice.
1053
00:52:34.309 --> 00:52:37.690
You must never sleep. I sleep like a baby.
1054
00:52:37.769 --> 00:52:39.590
No, you know how he solved that? It was like
1055
00:52:39.630 --> 00:52:42.590
an aversion therapy. He decided to be mean to everybody.
1056
00:52:43.130 --> 00:52:46.349
And that way he got numb to it. Yeah, yeah.
1057
00:52:46.369 --> 00:52:51.039
My son, I'm just, everybody. And so, but I think
1058
00:52:51.059 --> 00:52:54.090
the magic of that was all of the people in
1059
00:52:54.150 --> 00:52:57.269
line who you're making fun of for being, never seeing
1060
00:52:57.289 --> 00:52:59.949
a woman or, you know, being, which button do you
1061
00:52:59.969 --> 00:53:01.710
push to have your mother come pick you up, whatever,
1062
00:53:01.809 --> 00:53:07.619
all of those, they're all, all loving it. And that's
1063
00:53:07.699 --> 00:53:10.139
the key is, and they're just delighted and now they're
1064
00:53:10.199 --> 00:53:10.900
part of history.
1065
00:53:10.920 --> 00:53:14.000
They're like the funniest straight men that you could ask for.
1066
00:53:14.019 --> 00:53:16.139
And the fact that they're enjoying it just made it
1067
00:53:16.300 --> 00:53:20.760
like just a mutual pooper and poopy relationship.
1068
00:53:21.559 --> 00:53:28.309
United as one. It's just beautiful. It's a beautiful thing.
1069
00:53:30.130 --> 00:53:33.650
There are so many, you know, I mean, this is
1070
00:53:33.670 --> 00:53:35.710
the thing where it gets tricky because I could reminisce
1071
00:53:35.769 --> 00:53:39.079
with you about all of this for maybe 15 hours
1072
00:53:39.139 --> 00:53:42.920
and we would only scratch the surface. But something, I
1073
00:53:42.960 --> 00:53:45.780
just want to make sure that I get in here,
1074
00:53:45.800 --> 00:53:49.409
that I state that you've gone on You know, we
1075
00:53:49.429 --> 00:53:52.329
worked together all those years and then we've continued to
1076
00:53:52.369 --> 00:53:55.539
work together. We come back together. We work. We just did.
1077
00:53:55.559 --> 00:53:58.340
I mean, one of the highlights of my recent life
1078
00:53:58.380 --> 00:54:01.519
was you and I wrote Hans and Franz musical together
1079
00:54:01.619 --> 00:54:04.980
with Dana Carvey and Kevin Nealon. And then it just
1080
00:54:05.000 --> 00:54:07.309
got lost to time because it was never made. And
1081
00:54:07.329 --> 00:54:10.570
of course, foolishly, we wrote it so that Schwarzenegger, rather
1082
00:54:10.610 --> 00:54:13.710
than being a cameo, is in nine tenths of the movie.
1083
00:54:14.050 --> 00:54:16.460
It was the best. It was nice to see that
1084
00:54:16.519 --> 00:54:21.599
come around. And you've been doing all this amazing work
1085
00:54:21.639 --> 00:54:24.099
in comedy for all these years, but I have to
1086
00:54:24.159 --> 00:54:30.960
celebrate that Leo, you wrote this movie, Leo, and it's
1087
00:54:30.980 --> 00:54:34.239
an Adam Sandler animated film. And I saw it the
1088
00:54:34.280 --> 00:54:37.730
other night and I was completely blown away. It is
1089
00:54:38.269 --> 00:54:39.909
obviously funny, which I knew it would be, but it's
1090
00:54:39.969 --> 00:54:43.210
also so sweet and so nuanced and has a great,
1091
00:54:44.469 --> 00:54:47.289
And I thought, well, this is a classic. And then
1092
00:54:48.389 --> 00:54:52.150
I think yesterday I was told that it's the biggest
1093
00:54:53.349 --> 00:54:57.010
animated hit already that Netflix has ever had. Like it's
1094
00:54:57.050 --> 00:55:00.639
a complete smash. And I was practically crying. I'm so
1095
00:55:00.659 --> 00:55:03.199
happy for you and for Adam. I wrote both of
1096
00:55:03.219 --> 00:55:05.320
you guys. Adam's lawyer got it.
1097
00:55:06.980 --> 00:55:07.880
Sandy Werner got it.
1098
00:55:07.980 --> 00:55:10.440
I don't know.
1099
00:55:10.480 --> 00:55:12.659
I think we got a red line in this thing.
1100
00:55:13.590 --> 00:55:19.170
Let me give it a look to the lawyers.
1101
00:55:21.550 --> 00:55:23.349
He was really funny because I called him. He ended
1102
00:55:23.389 --> 00:55:24.989
up calling me after I wrote it. Sandy Wernick? No, no,
1103
00:55:25.010 --> 00:55:27.050
not Sandy Wernick, but Adam. After I told him, I
1104
00:55:27.110 --> 00:55:29.329
texted him. I said, Robert, I'm so happy for Robert.
1105
00:55:29.349 --> 00:55:31.170
I'm so happy for you. It's so well done. And
1106
00:55:31.210 --> 00:55:32.809
he calls me up and he was like asking me
1107
00:55:32.829 --> 00:55:34.909
about how my kids are doing and stuff like that.
1108
00:55:34.969 --> 00:55:37.409
And then he was doing this whole riff. because my
1109
00:55:37.469 --> 00:55:41.639
son is very gifted at computers and he loves computer engineering.
1110
00:55:41.679 --> 00:55:43.599
So he's looking at a lot of engineering schools and
1111
00:55:43.619 --> 00:55:46.920
a lot of like super scientific schools. And, and, and
1112
00:55:47.079 --> 00:55:49.739
Adam was like saying, Connie, I'll write him a letter.
1113
00:55:50.159 --> 00:55:52.329
Those people love me. And I went, As a joke.
1114
00:55:52.369 --> 00:55:54.650
And I was like, it's okay, Adam. He's like, it's
1115
00:55:54.809 --> 00:55:58.820
already done. I took care of it, buddy. I'm going
1116
00:55:58.840 --> 00:56:04.940
to send it to every engineering school. And I'm saying, no, Adam. No. No, Adam.
1117
00:56:04.960 --> 00:56:07.320
He's like, these are my people. I was crying. I
1118
00:56:07.340 --> 00:56:10.199
was laughing so hard. Don't worry, Kony. He's going to
1119
00:56:10.239 --> 00:56:10.820
be great.
1120
00:56:11.219 --> 00:56:12.039
Oh, he's the best.
1121
00:56:12.079 --> 00:56:14.530
Yeah, he's the best. God damn. I was, you know,
1122
00:56:14.550 --> 00:56:17.269
it's so funny because he does, the voice he does
1123
00:56:17.329 --> 00:56:21.849
in this for Leo is so unique. It's kind of Bernie. Yeah. Yes.
1124
00:56:22.130 --> 00:56:26.150
It's Bernie Brillstein, the famous manager that we all knew
1125
00:56:26.289 --> 00:56:29.409
and worked with. What I do know is people don't
1126
00:56:29.449 --> 00:56:33.679
understand that as in animation, the voice is everything. Like
1127
00:56:33.699 --> 00:56:37.320
the voice is more important than the actual animation because
1128
00:56:37.360 --> 00:56:39.360
it's the soul of who the person is, I think,
1129
00:56:39.519 --> 00:56:41.940
in a lot of ways. And that voice that he
1130
00:56:42.000 --> 00:56:45.110
does is so unique and it really works beautifully. Yeah,
1131
00:56:45.119 --> 00:56:47.690
it's like cranky and warm at the same time. Yeah.
1132
00:56:52.389 --> 00:56:52.699
Thank you.
1133
00:56:58.610 --> 00:57:02.380
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1134
00:57:02.420 --> 00:57:05.579
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1143
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Leaping vast distances, holding off armies... Eating tons of fresh grass. What?
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Not you, we're cows. That's one of the reasons Irish
1145
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milk is so good. It's famous all over the world.
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1150
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Reckon we'll need a fleet of about 50 vehicles next quarter. Oh,
1151
00:58:00.050 --> 00:58:02.010
one of our suppliers just pulled out of the market.
1152
00:58:02.449 --> 00:58:06.630
Ten should do the job. Nice, just won a new contract.
1153
00:58:06.949 --> 00:58:07.510
Make that 100 vehicles.
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1160
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It's funny because like when I had written it and
1161
00:58:34.050 --> 00:58:35.670
we were about to do a table read and I
1162
00:58:35.710 --> 00:58:37.840
had told him a couple of days earlier, I kind
1163
00:58:37.880 --> 00:58:40.920
of seeing, like, a Peter Falk kind of thing. And then, like,
1164
00:58:41.119 --> 00:58:43.800
right before the read-through, he says, Hey.
1165
00:58:43.820 --> 00:58:46.039
Buddy, I think I want to do Bernie.
1166
00:58:46.139 --> 00:58:48.889
And I was like, Oh, okay, go for it. And
1167
00:58:48.909 --> 00:58:51.050
then he killed it with the Bernie, and it was
1168
00:58:51.070 --> 00:58:54.010
just a great instinct. It's very funny because Bernie, I
1169
00:58:54.050 --> 00:58:59.289
taught him years ago, he never fucking know when we fucking...
1170
00:58:59.889 --> 00:59:01.880
When we cast Alf, remember?
1171
00:59:02.239 --> 00:59:03.300
Remember during Lookwell?
1172
00:59:03.739 --> 00:59:06.909
So Bernie was an executive producer of Lookwell because Conan
1173
00:59:06.949 --> 00:59:07.670
was with Brillstein.
1174
00:59:07.690 --> 00:59:10.130
Rick. And let me back up, because sometimes we go fast,
1175
00:59:10.630 --> 00:59:12.780
and I want to bring people up to speed. But
1176
00:59:13.340 --> 00:59:15.489
Robert came to me once when we were at SNL,
1177
00:59:15.820 --> 00:59:18.159
and he said, because we both loved the 60s series Batman.
1178
00:59:18.260 --> 00:59:20.500
Adam West. And he said to me, you know, I
1179
00:59:21.039 --> 00:59:23.059
have this idea. We've got to do something with Adam West.
1180
00:59:23.099 --> 00:59:24.760
And we started talking about it, and he was saying
1181
00:59:24.800 --> 00:59:28.070
like him, You know, maybe he's an out-of-work actor, but
1182
00:59:28.110 --> 00:59:30.940
he solves crimes. Still thinks he can solve crimes. But
1183
00:59:31.019 --> 00:59:33.159
because he made these shows, he thinks he can solve crimes.
1184
00:59:33.199 --> 00:59:35.860
So you and I sat down and pretty quickly wrote
1185
00:59:35.900 --> 00:59:38.469
this script. Yes. And we called the guy Ty Lookwell.
1186
00:59:38.679 --> 00:59:40.769
And that was your name. Yeah, it was great. And
1187
00:59:40.789 --> 00:59:43.369
then we go on this quest to get Adam West
1188
00:59:43.409 --> 00:59:45.369
to do it. And he does it. We make it,
1189
00:59:45.369 --> 00:59:47.469
and there's a lot of, that's a whole saga in
1190
00:59:47.510 --> 00:59:49.570
and of itself, because no one wanted us to make it,
1191
00:59:49.610 --> 00:59:52.280
the network. But then finally- Tartikoff got it. But Brandon
1192
00:59:52.300 --> 00:59:55.000
Tartikoff said, I get it. But then he left immediately,
1193
00:59:55.019 --> 00:59:59.119
and- Oh, no. So anyway- In Lauren's getaway car. Anyway.
1194
01:00:00.480 --> 01:00:02.239
And so we make this pilot, and we deliver it
1195
01:00:02.260 --> 01:00:04.000
to the network, and you and I were so excited,
1196
01:00:04.019 --> 01:00:06.389
because this is, we're on SNL, this is a bunch
1197
01:00:06.409 --> 01:00:08.710
of years before Late Night. We really think this is
1198
01:00:08.730 --> 01:00:10.690
our ticket to the top. We love it. We think
1199
01:00:10.730 --> 01:00:13.429
it's really ahead of its time. It's so cool. And Bernie,
1200
01:00:13.449 --> 01:00:15.199
because you can do the voice, but I'll never forget this.
1201
01:00:15.519 --> 01:00:18.219
So we're over at Bernie Brillstein's company. He's this big guy.
1202
01:00:18.719 --> 01:00:23.900
He's a Jewish Santa Claus. Yes. Santa Claus, cowardly lion. Yeah,
1203
01:00:23.940 --> 01:00:26.239
Santa Claus, cowardly lion. He wears all black because he
1204
01:00:26.260 --> 01:00:27.090
thinks it's slimming.
1205
01:00:27.110 --> 01:00:27.550
Slimming.
1206
01:00:27.760 --> 01:00:28.710
It's fucking slimming.
1207
01:00:28.849 --> 01:00:29.309
Slimming.
1208
01:00:29.630 --> 01:00:32.559
So anyway, we're- We're in his office and he's telling
1209
01:00:32.679 --> 01:00:34.940
us this thing is going to go through the roof.
1210
01:00:35.320 --> 01:00:38.090
Adam is going to test through that fucking roof. It's
1211
01:00:38.110 --> 01:00:40.110
going to be huge. It's going to be big. It's
1212
01:00:40.130 --> 01:00:41.670
going to be... And he's in the midst of this
1213
01:00:41.769 --> 01:00:45.090
long rant about how he knows... show business. He knows TV,
1214
01:00:45.110 --> 01:00:46.869
and this thing's going to go all the way, and
1215
01:00:46.909 --> 01:00:49.170
you guys have to start figuring out now which mansions
1216
01:00:49.190 --> 01:00:51.170
you want to live in in Beverly Hills. He's going
1217
01:00:51.309 --> 01:00:53.679
on and on and on when his assistant says, a
1218
01:00:53.719 --> 01:00:55.920
phone call from the network, Bernie, goes, put it through!
1219
01:00:56.260 --> 01:00:58.559
Rick Ludwin, yeah. So they put it through, and all
1220
01:00:58.579 --> 01:01:01.500
we can hear is Bernie's side of it. So Robert
1221
01:01:01.519 --> 01:01:03.780
and I are just flying high, and he gets on
1222
01:01:03.800 --> 01:01:07.039
the phone, and the first thing he goes, what? What
1223
01:01:07.099 --> 01:01:08.400
the fuck?
1224
01:01:08.659 --> 01:01:13.199
And then he starts sabotaging This is the best.
1225
01:01:13.219 --> 01:01:15.480
Because he also managed Lorne Michaels. Yeah.
1226
01:01:15.679 --> 01:01:18.440
And Lorne Michaels had two projects, Look Well, because he was,
1227
01:01:18.800 --> 01:01:22.340
you know, and he also had a Jack Handy pilot
1228
01:01:22.519 --> 01:01:25.710
based on Toonsis the Cat. It was a collection of
1229
01:01:25.750 --> 01:01:28.659
Jack Handy sketches and Toonsis was the glue to it.
1230
01:01:29.030 --> 01:01:32.550
And so Rick Ludwin is telling Bernie that, yeah, yeah,
1231
01:01:32.590 --> 01:01:35.880
Look Well didn't test terrific with our crew.
1232
01:01:35.960 --> 01:01:41.139
And that's fucking insane. Adam, this is a fucking genius
1233
01:01:41.300 --> 01:01:42.349
fucking script.
1234
01:01:43.030 --> 01:01:46.329
And then, uh, what do you fucking say? Yeah, yeah,
1235
01:01:46.349 --> 01:01:48.829
we're thinking of, uh, Toonsis might make it. Toonsis might
1236
01:01:48.849 --> 01:01:49.889
make the September scale.
1237
01:01:50.250 --> 01:01:55.280
Are you fucking kidding me? That thing is gonna fucking tank.
1238
01:01:55.340 --> 01:01:58.139
You're gonna put that thing on. And that's his client too.
1239
01:01:58.159 --> 01:02:00.559
It's also his client. It's also his client.
1240
01:02:00.579 --> 01:02:03.659
But Bernie didn't have, but Burlstein Gray wasn't producing Toonsis.
1241
01:02:03.679 --> 01:02:06.039
Well, it doesn't matter. No, it mattered to Bernie. It's
1242
01:02:06.219 --> 01:02:09.179
Lawrence's big meal ticket. And he's like, why long can't
1243
01:02:09.239 --> 01:02:13.800
find his ass with three hands? And it's just, but anyway,
1244
01:02:13.840 --> 01:02:16.699
the point is you and I are sitting there, these kids. Yes.
1245
01:02:17.159 --> 01:02:20.639
And all we hear is, what? And the first thing
1246
01:02:20.679 --> 01:02:23.980
he said was, it's the first thing you screened after lunch?
1247
01:02:24.539 --> 01:02:29.780
People are digesting. I'll never forget sitting there listening to that.
1248
01:02:30.119 --> 01:02:34.889
Fucking Sue Mangers told me this 45 years ago.
1249
01:02:34.909 --> 01:02:41.380
You fucking idiots have no fucking clue. So we, uh,
1250
01:02:41.780 --> 01:02:43.880
I saw you today for the first time in person
1251
01:02:43.960 --> 01:02:48.210
since Leo came out and I felt emotional because I'm
1252
01:02:48.269 --> 01:02:51.690
so happy for you. You're my friend, but also I
1253
01:02:52.070 --> 01:02:54.329
was saying you and I have collaborated on so much
1254
01:02:54.409 --> 01:02:56.329
stuff and there's, there's a lot of noise out there
1255
01:02:56.349 --> 01:02:58.429
and I'm very proud of the stuff we've worked on together.
1256
01:02:58.869 --> 01:03:01.519
But I saw this thing and I thought, oh, this
1257
01:03:01.599 --> 01:03:03.840
is going to be a movie that kids are watching
1258
01:03:04.079 --> 01:03:06.730
and with their parents. Cause it's really funny. They're gonna
1259
01:03:06.750 --> 01:03:10.269
be watching it like 50 years from now. I don't
1260
01:03:10.309 --> 01:03:12.670
know how, they'll be putting drops in their eyes and
1261
01:03:12.690 --> 01:03:17.579
watching it. But no, it's really, I think it's lasting.
1262
01:03:17.599 --> 01:03:22.360
I think it's a classic. And I was just delighted,
1263
01:03:22.539 --> 01:03:25.260
just really delighted for you, because Jesus, you know you
1264
01:03:25.280 --> 01:03:27.260
deserve it. Thank you.
1265
01:03:27.659 --> 01:03:30.780
It feels like the first thing I've ever done that
1266
01:03:31.320 --> 01:03:33.019
everyone agreed on at.
1267
01:03:33.000 --> 01:03:33.840
The same time.
1268
01:03:34.340 --> 01:03:38.489
Like, you know, our show, was amazing and we loved
1269
01:03:38.550 --> 01:03:40.530
it more than anything and there was an audience that
1270
01:03:40.570 --> 01:03:43.019
got it there's always and and i've had you know
1271
01:03:43.059 --> 01:03:45.059
and then a little segments that i've done like the
1272
01:03:45.099 --> 01:03:48.940
cartoons on snl but any independent project that i've done
1273
01:03:49.059 --> 01:03:51.340
even the ones that were successful like the zohan or
1274
01:03:51.360 --> 01:03:55.070
right hotel transylvania it wasn't a critical success this is
1275
01:03:55.130 --> 01:03:57.989
like everything it's everyone's coming together yeah it's never happened
1276
01:03:58.030 --> 01:04:00.710
to me in my whole career so it's like it's
1277
01:04:00.769 --> 01:04:05.010
just weird But I love it and I'm very excited
1278
01:04:05.110 --> 01:04:08.440
and yeah, I'm very happy. And it was, I really.
1279
01:04:08.119 --> 01:04:10.840
Stuck my neck. And it's four years. I know. You've
1280
01:04:10.860 --> 01:04:12.739
been working on this for four years. You've been telling
1281
01:04:12.780 --> 01:04:15.519
me about it. And I've been saying enough with the talking.
1282
01:04:15.840 --> 01:04:16.449
Where is it?
1283
01:04:16.579 --> 01:04:16.860
I know.
1284
01:04:17.380 --> 01:04:18.199
It was maddening.
1285
01:04:18.500 --> 01:04:21.260
And I would like go on Zoom meetings, like, you know,
1286
01:04:21.639 --> 01:04:24.380
because like first you animate it to like black and
1287
01:04:24.420 --> 01:04:25.179
white drawings.
1288
01:04:25.460 --> 01:04:26.760
Animatics. Animatics.
1289
01:04:26.860 --> 01:04:29.539
Yeah. we tested it and it did great.
1290
01:04:29.559 --> 01:04:30.340
And it's like, great.
1291
01:04:30.480 --> 01:04:33.219
Now make it do the whole thing over. And that
1292
01:04:33.260 --> 01:04:36.099
was like the creative process working with board artists. Now
1293
01:04:36.119 --> 01:04:40.519
you're converting the whole thing to 3d. And it's almost like, okay,
1294
01:04:40.539 --> 01:04:42.760
we just want it to be as good as the animatic. Now,
1295
01:04:42.820 --> 01:04:45.719
like we've made most of the creative decisions and it's
1296
01:04:45.760 --> 01:04:49.610
just so technical. And like, sometimes there'd be zoom meetings
1297
01:04:49.670 --> 01:04:52.070
where my other two directors, like my notes were usually
1298
01:04:52.110 --> 01:04:53.670
about acting and they'd be like.
1299
01:04:53.690 --> 01:04:54.829
Hey, Leo's tail.
1300
01:04:54.889 --> 01:04:56.849
It has a little bump. It's off model and shit
1301
01:04:56.869 --> 01:04:59.769
like that. I would literally just to be sane, I
1302
01:04:59.969 --> 01:05:03.030
would like mute myself on the zoom and start making
1303
01:05:03.309 --> 01:05:10.480
animal noises. What do you think cow? And I would
1304
01:05:10.539 --> 01:05:12.500
send it to friends with like, they would hear the
1305
01:05:12.920 --> 01:05:15.780
meeting in the background. The cow doesn't like the idea.
1306
01:05:15.800 --> 01:05:15.900
Sorry.
1307
01:05:16.760 --> 01:05:19.199
You know, we, we, uh, The other thing I should
1308
01:05:19.239 --> 01:05:22.559
point out is you write the music in this. There's
1309
01:05:22.579 --> 01:05:25.409
a lot of really great songs in it. Oh, that's nice.
1310
01:05:25.699 --> 01:05:28.920
But it was fun for me because you and I,
1311
01:05:29.269 --> 01:05:31.130
one thing we always had in common was we always
1312
01:05:31.170 --> 01:05:35.090
wanted sketches to turn into songs. I know, I know.
1313
01:05:36.300 --> 01:05:38.659
we thought sketches should have a theme song. So when
1314
01:05:38.679 --> 01:05:42.639
we were working on Mr. Short-Term Memory, we wanted it
1315
01:05:42.679 --> 01:05:44.980
to have a song. And Lorne was like, can't.
1316
01:05:44.820 --> 01:05:47.199
It just be, because Don Pardo for years would just be,
1317
01:05:47.219 --> 01:05:51.320
I'm now another episode of Short-Term Memory Man.
1318
01:05:51.639 --> 01:05:52.980
And Lorne literally.
1319
01:05:52.599 --> 01:05:54.699
Said, can't it just be now another episode of.
1320
01:05:55.610 --> 01:05:57.769
And we were like, no, it has to be. And,
1321
01:05:57.889 --> 01:06:00.469
and Odin Kirk and, and, and Greg Daniels were working
1322
01:06:00.489 --> 01:06:02.190
on this too, but we wanted, we were like, no, no,
1323
01:06:02.230 --> 01:06:04.550
it has to be a song. Mr. Short term memory.
1324
01:06:04.610 --> 01:06:04.829
Yes.
1325
01:06:04.949 --> 01:06:07.230
He shouldn't have sat under that pear tree.
1326
01:06:07.269 --> 01:06:07.530
Yes.
1327
01:06:07.750 --> 01:06:10.050
And it's sitting under a pear tree and a pear
1328
01:06:10.090 --> 01:06:11.510
drops and hits him on the head. Now he has
1329
01:06:11.579 --> 01:06:12.260
no memory.
1330
01:06:12.280 --> 01:06:15.179
He'll frustrate you. So, but he'll never know.
1331
01:06:17.460 --> 01:06:18.940
It was one of those things. It was like the
1332
01:06:19.019 --> 01:06:20.539
first one. Yeah.
1333
01:06:20.679 --> 01:06:23.480
I love the elegance of that first line. And, but
1334
01:06:23.519 --> 01:06:26.329
then that became like a, a plague on the show.
1335
01:06:26.469 --> 01:06:30.329
Like everybody started putting jingles at the top of every,
1336
01:06:30.670 --> 01:06:31.409
every character.
1337
01:06:31.449 --> 01:06:32.510
Everything had to have a jingle.
1338
01:06:32.610 --> 01:06:35.409
Everything had a jingle, but yes. Um, actually I, I
1339
01:06:35.630 --> 01:06:37.969
would have to, the, the biggest thrill of this movie
1340
01:06:38.289 --> 01:06:41.250
on some level is just the balls to write songs
1341
01:06:41.650 --> 01:06:44.969
and music. Like I was so scared to do it
1342
01:06:45.179 --> 01:06:47.739
on one hand, but then I like, I knew a composer,
1343
01:06:47.760 --> 01:06:51.079
this brilliant composer, David Yazbek. I can't even play a
1344
01:06:51.079 --> 01:06:54.980
musical instrument. I just sang these into garage band. And
1345
01:06:55.340 --> 01:06:57.050
then I sent them to him, and I was like,
1346
01:06:57.070 --> 01:06:59.110
did these suck? And he was like, no, they don't suck.
1347
01:06:59.219 --> 01:06:59.989
And I was like, oh, God.
1348
01:07:00.050 --> 01:07:02.429
The song at the end with all the children saying
1349
01:07:02.469 --> 01:07:03.190
how old they are.
1350
01:07:03.210 --> 01:07:05.170
Oh, when I was 10? Yeah. That's beautiful. And then
1351
01:07:05.250 --> 01:07:07.050
it blends into the next age. Thank you.
1352
01:07:07.070 --> 01:07:07.590
It was amazing.
1353
01:07:07.670 --> 01:07:12.409
Yeah, that's my favorite. Yeah, I love it because it's funny.
1354
01:07:12.789 --> 01:07:16.570
It starts out really funny. The premise is probably an
1355
01:07:16.630 --> 01:07:19.510
old Peanuts premise, like a kid thinking, oh, back when
1356
01:07:19.550 --> 01:07:23.460
I was seven, you have no idea what you're looking for.
1357
01:07:23.969 --> 01:07:29.440
But I just love the lyrics are very silly at first.
1358
01:07:29.500 --> 01:07:32.599
We all left milk for Santa Claus. My mom was
1359
01:07:32.699 --> 01:07:34.420
not in menopause.
1360
01:07:33.820 --> 01:07:34.519
And that kind of thing.
1361
01:07:34.579 --> 01:07:38.079
And it's all very heartfelt and they're in a spotlight.
1362
01:07:38.440 --> 01:07:42.269
And then it turns at one point, one girl's reminiscing
1363
01:07:42.309 --> 01:07:45.369
about her grandfather and my gerbils are still alive. It's
1364
01:07:45.389 --> 01:07:47.250
still kind of funny. And then another kid says, I
1365
01:07:47.289 --> 01:07:51.630
didn't care that people died, which is something that's Based
1366
01:07:51.829 --> 01:07:55.610
on something I experienced with my son, Rowe, who's also
1367
01:07:55.650 --> 01:07:59.210
in the movie. He plays the whatever kid, the allergy kid.
1368
01:07:59.389 --> 01:08:02.829
Oh, God. The drone kid. But anyway. That's great. I
1369
01:08:02.869 --> 01:08:04.760
love the drone. Oh, the drone's amazing.
1370
01:08:04.780 --> 01:08:07.780
When he goes full Bridget Jones, it starts eating the
1371
01:08:07.840 --> 01:08:09.840
chocolate ice cream.
1372
01:08:09.900 --> 01:08:10.960
I love that. Thank you.
1373
01:08:11.260 --> 01:08:15.340
But so, Rowe, when my dad passed away, my kids
1374
01:08:15.440 --> 01:08:17.979
used to laugh at the idea of death. I don't
1375
01:08:18.000 --> 01:08:20.899
know if you have a similar, but my kids still do. Well,
1376
01:08:20.939 --> 01:08:23.539
you know, you never get over the shock and then
1377
01:08:23.600 --> 01:08:27.020
it's like, oh, realize how funny it is after your
1378
01:08:27.060 --> 01:08:27.960
own parents die.
1379
01:08:28.399 --> 01:08:28.600
No.
1380
01:08:28.659 --> 01:08:29.479
So, no.
1381
01:08:29.939 --> 01:08:32.739
So Rowie, they would, they would like death, man. What
1382
01:08:32.800 --> 01:08:34.920
is that all about? And they'd giggle about how weird
1383
01:08:34.960 --> 01:08:37.039
it is when they were like four. And then like
1384
01:08:37.079 --> 01:08:39.939
my dad passed away when they were eight and he
1385
01:08:40.000 --> 01:08:42.539
had a long illness and a beautiful long life. So
1386
01:08:42.600 --> 01:08:44.970
the part of me was relieved. But the thing that
1387
01:08:45.029 --> 01:08:48.989
really made me cry was like hearing Rowe experience it
1388
01:08:49.140 --> 01:08:51.939
and cry. He was crying really hard. I was with
1389
01:08:51.979 --> 01:08:54.020
my mom until I spoke to him on the phone.
1390
01:08:54.239 --> 01:08:56.489
And I realized that not only is he crying because
1391
01:08:56.529 --> 01:08:59.869
he adored his grandfather, but because he's taking in this.
1392
01:09:00.729 --> 01:09:01.329
Reality.
1393
01:09:01.529 --> 01:09:05.590
So that part gets me every time. That's when I
1394
01:09:05.829 --> 01:09:07.270
get emotional when I hear that song.
1395
01:09:07.750 --> 01:09:12.109
Well, it's an absolutely beautiful movie. It's nice when it
1396
01:09:12.529 --> 01:09:15.260
all comes together. I finally know. Jesus, I'm looking at this.
1397
01:09:15.619 --> 01:09:20.500
Leo has had this crazy... 34.6 million views in its
1398
01:09:20.560 --> 01:09:23.550
first six days. I don't know what that means, but
1399
01:09:23.569 --> 01:09:27.350
it sounds like a lot. That's the biggest debut ever
1400
01:09:27.430 --> 01:09:30.739
for a Netflix animated film. That's nice. So that's, I mean,
1401
01:09:31.159 --> 01:09:32.960
as long as you have a big piece of the merch,
1402
01:09:33.000 --> 01:09:41.800
you're okay. Oops. Somehow I do. Lorne! Somewhere in Maine.
1403
01:09:41.819 --> 01:09:45.329
Somewhere in Maine. A blueberry farm just got a little bigger.
1404
01:09:45.350 --> 01:09:46.430
It's a blueberry farm, right?
1405
01:09:46.590 --> 01:09:49.770
Yeah, it's a massive blueberry farm. You know the... And also,
1406
01:09:49.819 --> 01:09:51.149
this is like, we have to do it because we
1407
01:09:51.210 --> 01:09:54.069
all do Lorne voices and make Lorne jokes, but you
1408
01:09:54.109 --> 01:09:57.390
and I would be completely unknown to everybody if it
1409
01:09:57.409 --> 01:10:00.210
weren't for Lorne Michaels. Oh, without a doubt. We love
1410
01:10:00.250 --> 01:10:01.850
him to death. We love him to death. But we
1411
01:10:01.890 --> 01:10:04.729
love doing his voice. We love doing his voice. The blueberries.
1412
01:10:04.850 --> 01:10:07.340
And that he has a giant blueberry farm in Maine.
1413
01:10:07.350 --> 01:10:13.609
Wait a minute. So it's like, you know, the blueberries....
1414
01:10:14.000 --> 01:10:17.300
We don't sell the blueberries because they're ripe. We sell
1415
01:10:17.319 --> 01:10:23.199
them because it's 1130 on Saturday night.
1416
01:10:26.100 --> 01:10:28.229
Well, Robert, I should probably wrap this up, but there's
1417
01:10:28.250 --> 01:10:31.770
going to be a part two at some point. But
1418
01:10:31.930 --> 01:10:34.250
thank you for doing this. I love you. You changed
1419
01:10:34.289 --> 01:10:36.989
my life. You're the best. You keep changing it, ruining it,
1420
01:10:37.050 --> 01:10:39.680
but also making it better. Making and changing it back. Yep.
1421
01:10:40.029 --> 01:10:42.149
Fixing, smashing, and then making. Enjoy, I want you to
1422
01:10:42.189 --> 01:10:45.470
be happy. You should be, I can't believe you could
1423
01:10:45.529 --> 01:10:47.489
even say that you're still nervous.
1424
01:10:47.569 --> 01:10:49.140
You are. I'm not nervous.
1425
01:10:49.239 --> 01:10:52.199
But it's like, I'm so happy for you because I
1426
01:10:52.220 --> 01:10:55.500
think it's, can I take two seconds to just remember? Okay,
1427
01:10:55.539 --> 01:10:58.760
so I remember like that summer, Conan would do these
1428
01:10:59.220 --> 01:11:03.210
practice shows, 1993, I'm talking again. And like Dino, like
1429
01:11:03.229 --> 01:11:05.510
a couple of writers would be out there and there's
1430
01:11:05.550 --> 01:11:09.170
no audience there. And Conan would just be so fucking funny,
1431
01:11:09.390 --> 01:11:11.369
just relaxed on stage. And there was a part of
1432
01:11:11.409 --> 01:11:13.090
me that was like, why do we have to have
1433
01:11:13.130 --> 01:11:15.130
an audience? Why do we even have to have an audience?
1434
01:11:15.170 --> 01:11:17.060
It's just going to get in the way. And he
1435
01:11:17.100 --> 01:11:19.659
figured it out and obviously had an amazing career on
1436
01:11:19.699 --> 01:11:24.000
late night television. But this show is everything that you are.
1437
01:11:24.159 --> 01:11:26.819
It's so amazing. We get to see how smart you
1438
01:11:26.960 --> 01:11:32.699
are and thoughtful and spontaneously funny. And I'm over the
1439
01:11:32.739 --> 01:11:35.939
moon for you. You have this and how popular it is.
1440
01:11:36.550 --> 01:11:41.270
I know you're happy. No, no, I am. I'm very blessed. Anyway,
1441
01:11:42.130 --> 01:11:46.140
love you. Everyone has already seen Leo twice by these metrics,
1442
01:11:46.159 --> 01:11:51.819
but everyone go see it nine times and congratulations. Thank you. Mazel. Mazel.
1443
01:11:51.859 --> 01:11:52.399
Mazel.
1444
01:11:52.439 --> 01:11:53.760
I'm filled with mazel.
1445
01:11:55.609 --> 01:11:59.529
Conan O'Brien needs a friend. With Conan O'Brien, Sona Movsesian,
1446
01:11:59.770 --> 01:12:03.470
and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gourley. Executive produced
1447
01:12:03.489 --> 01:12:06.810
by Adam Sachs, Nick Leal, and Jeff Ross at Team Coco,
1448
01:12:07.050 --> 01:12:10.649
and Colin Anderson and Cody Fisher at Earwolf. Theme song
1449
01:12:10.689 --> 01:12:13.829
by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino.
1450
01:12:14.170 --> 01:12:14.909
Take it away, Jimmy.
1451
01:12:17.989 --> 01:12:21.000
Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent
1452
01:12:21.039 --> 01:12:25.500
producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering by Eduardo Perez. Additional production
1453
01:12:25.539 --> 01:12:29.600
support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista,
1454
01:12:29.880 --> 01:12:32.449
and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show
1455
01:12:32.510 --> 01:12:35.149
on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read
1456
01:12:35.270 --> 01:12:37.909
on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call
1457
01:12:37.930 --> 01:12:42.850
the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message.
1458
01:12:43.170 --> 01:12:45.449
It too could be featured on a future episode. And
1459
01:12:45.489 --> 01:12:48.270
if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs
1460
01:12:48.310 --> 01:12:50.939
a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.
1461
01:13:06.979 --> 01:13:10.739
Good nights are about the people. The laughs. The real
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Reckon we'll need a fleet of about 50 vehicles next quarter. Oh,
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one of our suppliers just pulled out of the market.
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Ten should do the job. Nice, just won a new contract.
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Make that 100 vehicles.
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