Chasing Thoughts | S02 E24: Change is on the Horizon

1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,080
Welcome to the Chasing Thoughts podcast.
2
00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:08,440
Chasing Thoughts was founded by strangers, two life coaches who met on TikTok and shared
3
00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:12,800
the desire to create a different kind of life coaching podcast.
4
00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:18,320
Instead of talking about how to do it right, the Chasing Thoughts podcast explores embracing
5
00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:23,200
our true essence to find a deeper sense of purpose and fulfillment.
6
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:28,120
Life coaches Keith and Mindy take a unique approach that transcends popular notions of
7
00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:33,640
perpetual happiness in striving relentlessly to become one's ideal self.
8
00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:38,520
Listen in as Mindy, Keith and their guests take a deep dive into their own minds and
9
00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:44,760
souls to investigate the beauty of imperfection, challenge their beliefs, and embrace the richness
10
00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:47,560
of living a truly authentic life.
11
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:55,000
Hi, my name is Keith and I'm a strategic interventionist and stoner-spirited life coach.
12
00:00:55,000 --> 00:01:01,240
Hi, my name is Mindy and I am an authenticity empowerment coach.
13
00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:03,680
Welcome to Chasing Thoughts.
14
00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:12,880
Hi everybody, welcome to Chasing Thoughts.
15
00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:18,720
You got Keith and I today, just investigating, seeing where the conversation goes.
16
00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:23,440
What's been going on for you, Keith?
17
00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:27,640
I don't even know how to explain it.
18
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:36,440
I've been trying to when we talk and stuff, but I feel like I've found the path that I'm
19
00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:42,600
supposed to be down.
20
00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:47,440
There's a lot of trepidation, but it also feels like a hug from the universe.
21
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:48,440
You know what I mean?
22
00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:49,440
It feels comfortable.
23
00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:51,720
Yeah, I love that.
24
00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:56,720
I haven't felt that in such a long time.
25
00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:57,720
Yeah.
26
00:01:57,720 --> 00:02:07,640
Yeah, I know that you and I are both going through a real energetic shift right now.
27
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:14,720
And I'm really just trying to remain in a place of surrender.
28
00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:15,720
Yes.
29
00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:21,720
Which is a case, it's work to do that, right?
30
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,920
Oh my God, yeah.
31
00:02:23,920 --> 00:02:31,920
It takes more work, I think, to surrender into that because we have to overcome first
32
00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:37,160
off all our belief systems around just that word, you know, the negative connotations with
33
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:40,000
that.
34
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,720
Where we associate with surrender with failure.
35
00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:43,720
Yeah.
36
00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:54,040
You know, but it's almost just like taking a trust fall into life and having faith that
37
00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:57,720
life is going to work for you and not against you.
38
00:02:57,720 --> 00:02:59,280
Yeah.
39
00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:08,240
And I think that the mind, you know, the mind is there to protect us and keep us alive.
40
00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:18,600
So it uses things like cynicism and doubt and fear to try to keep us on the right path.
41
00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:25,120
But while that's valuable, it's not an effective leader.
42
00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:34,120
And so, you know, what I'm realizing is the last couple of days as my brain says, oh,
43
00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:39,760
it can never really be that easy or the rug's going to be pulled out from under you at some
44
00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:44,280
point, you know, you have to stay alert, don't surrender.
45
00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:47,480
I'm like, oh, okay, I like bow down to that thought.
46
00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:49,760
I see you're protecting me.
47
00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:50,760
Thank you.
48
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:51,760
Thank you.
49
00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:52,760
Thank you.
50
00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:55,240
Now you can just take a side seat.
51
00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:58,560
I'm going to focus over here.
52
00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:00,760
Yeah.
53
00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:05,880
And that's a new relationship with my mind.
54
00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:06,880
Yeah.
55
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:07,880
Yeah.
56
00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:12,080
I've felt like my mind go more quiet.
57
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:13,080
Yeah.
58
00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:20,920
And it's a calming feeling, you know, because I'm the type that lives mainly in my head,
59
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:31,400
I'm more in my head than I am in the exterior world, but my mind has just gone quiet, you
60
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:35,880
know, like I don't have this need to just like ramble.
61
00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:40,840
I'm afraid like the true message won't come across.
62
00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:46,080
So I have to make sure with as many words as possible and as many analogies and many
63
00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:52,400
ways as I possibly can to get that message across, but it's not needed.
64
00:04:52,400 --> 00:05:00,560
And I think one thing you and I have been talking about is that transfer of energy is
65
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:07,760
more important than whatever words I'm saying or you're saying.
66
00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:13,440
And I always knew that that was true in person to person relationships, like when you're
67
00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:21,040
both in the same room, but I've started to get so curious about what is the energy transfer
68
00:05:21,040 --> 00:05:22,960
when we're on zoom?
69
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:28,720
What's the energy transfer when somebody has to comment on my thing, right?
70
00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:30,240
And there you have an emotion there.
71
00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,240
I have an emotion.
72
00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:38,360
And so we have the internet, which is this new tool, but we don't understand how the
73
00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:43,680
energetic reaction of humans is working on this new platform, right?
74
00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:49,160
We know from, you know, all the new sort of science and quantum research, I can impact
75
00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:53,720
you even though you're hundreds of miles away.
76
00:05:53,720 --> 00:06:00,520
And so it's been really interesting to me as I have played more with that idea, like
77
00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:04,960
when all these people comment on my post, there's an energetic transfer I'm having with
78
00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:07,600
each of these humans in a way.
79
00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:08,600
Yes.
80
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:09,600
Yeah.
81
00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:13,800
I just saw a video and I want to read this article.
82
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:17,760
I think it was like in the Scientific American or something like that.
83
00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:26,120
Some scientific, I don't know if it's a journal or just a regular magazine or something, but
84
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:33,600
in 2022, the people who won the Nobel Prize had found, you know, that whole old saying
85
00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:37,360
like if a tree falls in the woods and no one's there to hear it, does it make a sound?
86
00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:44,840
So basically what they found is like, might not.
87
00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:52,360
So it's all about locality and I'm going to butcher this so bad.
88
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:56,800
And this is why I want to like get into it so I can try to understand this better.
89
00:06:56,800 --> 00:07:04,600
So if you have two elements, like so you got like two elements that are born together.
90
00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:07,000
They're called quantum entangled.
91
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:12,560
And if you change the spin on one, the spin on the other will change immediately at the
92
00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:15,520
same time, even if they're on opposite ends of the universe.
93
00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:20,040
And there should be a speed limit for the universe, which is the speed of light.
94
00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:24,720
But there's something that can break that and they don't know what that is.
95
00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:29,560
You know, to me, it's consciousness, it's energy and it's cool not being a scientist
96
00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:34,440
like where I can make that leap, you know, into like sort of that, like, oh, that's what
97
00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:36,800
I think it is, you know, and kind of believe in that.
98
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:41,480
And I think that's the thing, like even with this, even though we are on opposite sides
99
00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:48,320
of the country, whenever we get off a call, I always feel energized.
100
00:07:48,320 --> 00:07:54,120
You know, so it's almost like we have part of that entanglement in some way going on
101
00:07:54,120 --> 00:08:01,080
that even though we're so far away, we're still in real time, like receiving and giving
102
00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:03,080
energy to each other.
103
00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:10,040
Yeah, which makes the internet and social media such a powerful tool.
104
00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:18,000
And there are a lot of people who are vibrating in a way that is changing lives on YouTube,
105
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:21,280
on TikTok.
106
00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:26,800
And I know a lot of people think that's a funny thing to say or, you know, have some
107
00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:31,960
kind of like aversion to that being true, but it's true.
108
00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:34,960
Very true.
109
00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:42,080
And I think of some of the people that we've talked about looking at their stuff and emulating
110
00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:49,560
in a way or seeing the way that they talk or make their whatever that we like.
111
00:08:49,560 --> 00:08:53,960
And I think of Jason Silva, you know, and Soul of Jared.
112
00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:58,520
And I'm going to forget his last name, but Abin, I love their videos.
113
00:08:58,520 --> 00:09:04,080
I mean, Jason Silva, I need a dictionary when he talks, you know what I mean?
114
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:06,680
Because I'm like, what are half of these words?
115
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:13,880
But he's almost like this, like a poet, you know, like how this just comes off his head.
116
00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:15,080
I don't know.
117
00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:18,320
But the way he speaks is just so amazing.
118
00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:26,000
And opposite of that, too, is that when we are giving our energy out like that, we're
119
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:30,520
also showing the world who we are inside.
120
00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:38,920
So when we're nasty, we're just we're basically we're trying to look tougher or whatever, whatever,
121
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:43,320
whatever we're trying to achieve, putting somebody else down so I can lift myself up,
122
00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:48,400
you know, but really what we're doing is just showing the world that inside we're hurt,
123
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:49,400
bad.
124
00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:50,400
Yeah.
125
00:09:50,400 --> 00:10:00,000
I think it's so true that anytime somebody says something, they're revealing themselves.
126
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,280
And we're not trained to see it that way, right?
127
00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:07,360
So if someone says, I'm fat, I think, oh, no, I'm fat boohoo.
128
00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:15,360
But what's really happening is, huh, I now know what your definition of fat is.
129
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:17,400
I know something about you.
130
00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:22,000
And that's just like a silly example, but you can use a thousand different things.
131
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:27,120
When another person says something, we have this like erroneous way of perceiving that
132
00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:29,560
it's true about us.
133
00:10:29,560 --> 00:10:33,840
But when really, it's all about them.
134
00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:39,320
And that is a good thing when you realize it because you can take things less personally.
135
00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:40,320
Yes.
136
00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:44,760
But it's also like you're saying on the other side, risky, because it means every time I
137
00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:52,760
say something, I'm letting people know what's going on in here, what's going on in here.
138
00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:53,760
Yup.
139
00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:54,760
Yup.
140
00:10:54,760 --> 00:11:00,240
And all of that is our clues to the inner world that we all have.
141
00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:05,800
So when somebody says something, makes a comment, and if I put out a video, and I've
142
00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:09,640
had a couple of people just kind of like, nope, you're wrong.
143
00:11:09,640 --> 00:11:12,560
Just outright, you're wrong.
144
00:11:12,560 --> 00:11:15,280
And I'm like, oh, that pisses me off.
145
00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:19,480
You know, like who are you to tell me, you know, and so that that's a clue to something
146
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:25,520
inside that I need to look at because I don't want my emotions.
147
00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:27,880
I've come to learn.
148
00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,520
I've come to fall in love with my emotions.
149
00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:36,040
And one of the things like, you know, if you look at the light spectrum, you know, we see
150
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:41,440
what's that like Rory G. Biv, like red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo violet, like we
151
00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:49,240
see the visible light spectrum, but we never think about the entire spectrum.
152
00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:54,120
And it's the same way emotionally, I think, at least in our society, you know, we have
153
00:11:54,120 --> 00:12:00,840
love, joy, sadness, anger, we just very basic.
154
00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:04,120
What are they like, six or seven emotions?
155
00:12:04,120 --> 00:12:11,200
But there's a spectrum of those, you know, and especially what guys talking about emotions,
156
00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:17,840
like it doesn't mean that we walk around like we're crying all the time about like, oh,
157
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:21,480
I feel this, but you know, but I can be upset.
158
00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:28,320
But in fact, the art yesterday, we're having some we're having solar panels put on.
159
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:32,560
And so one of the things that the company does, they do like an energy efficiency check
160
00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:38,000
and, you know, like for free, they're changing light bulbs and they change weather stripping
161
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:39,800
around the door.
162
00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:45,440
And so it moved like they had to move the deadbolt a little bit with the new weather
163
00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:46,800
stripping.
164
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:51,640
And I could not, I could not get it to catch.
165
00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:53,840
And I started getting pissed.
166
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:58,560
And I was like, wow, this is the first time in a long time something so small and insignificant
167
00:12:58,560 --> 00:12:59,560
has made me pissed.
168
00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:05,120
And Sandy's like, all right, relax, she comes over and she just turns it and it catches.
169
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:07,120
And I'm like, fuck you, man.
170
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:13,600
She's like, whoa, and I did it as like a joke, but I was like, yeah, I was getting pissed.
171
00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:14,880
And then, you know, we talked about it.
172
00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:24,000
So like, so I, I'm angry, but I'm not in a rage, you know, so anger has spectrum.
173
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,000
Yeah.
174
00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,000
Yeah.
175
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:29,280
You know, all of our emotions do love has a spectrum.
176
00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:34,640
I could say, you know, the way I say I love you to my wife and, and dude, I've, I've, I
177
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:35,640
love you.
178
00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:42,120
And we've gotten so close, like it's a different, you know, so it's not just one and done.
179
00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:43,120
Yeah.
180
00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:49,520
And I think the more that we lean into that, the more we can have really deep relationships
181
00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:58,600
because we're not trying to just, you know, hold it in or compartmentalize who we are
182
00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:00,120
and how we feel.
183
00:14:00,120 --> 00:14:01,120
Yeah.
184
00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:02,120
Yeah.
185
00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:03,760
There's no reason to do that.
186
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:08,000
There's a freedom in that surrender, in that vulnerability.
187
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:14,160
I mean, just like Brené Brown said, like vulnerability will either be the seat of shame.
188
00:14:14,160 --> 00:14:21,440
I'm going to forget all of them, but like, you know, shame, doubt, guilt, you know, depression
189
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:27,440
in your life, our lives, or it can be the birthplace of creativity, of joy, of love,
190
00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:30,880
you know, and, and that's the side I want to live on.
191
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:38,440
But, and Brené Brown talks about this a lot too, you have to be willing to not tap out
192
00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,160
when it gets uncomfortable.
193
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:41,160
Yes.
194
00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:48,800
You've got to stay in whatever you're feeling because most of us have limits on our feelings,
195
00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:49,800
right?
196
00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:54,560
We get scared if we're too angry, too happy, too this, too that we want to stay on this
197
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:55,760
middle line.
198
00:14:55,760 --> 00:15:00,840
And so we have a tendency, if this conversation gets too uncomfortable to back up, if, if
199
00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:03,800
you know, whatever it is, and it's like, no, you got to stay in it.
200
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:05,320
You got to be uncomfortable.
201
00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:06,320
Yeah.
202
00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:07,320
And it's okay.
203
00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:08,320
Okay.
204
00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:09,320
Okay.
205
00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:10,720
To be uncomfortable.
206
00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:13,240
And that's how you get out on the other side.
207
00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:14,240
Yeah.
208
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:15,240
Yeah.
209
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:16,240
Yeah.
210
00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:21,360
And I know like for the longest time, I mean, 20 years, I, I, the, the fight that I had was
211
00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:23,800
I don't want to feel this way.
212
00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:26,400
You know, so the only thing going through my head is why do I feel this way?
213
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:27,400
I shouldn't feel this way.
214
00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:28,560
There's no reason for why.
215
00:15:28,560 --> 00:15:35,640
Like I don't want to, and then it's looking for ways to get myself to feel different.
216
00:15:35,640 --> 00:15:38,960
And it's so easy to find those ways.
217
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:43,920
You know, and, and that's like one of the things like when in, in the coaching that
218
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:49,520
I, I, I took, um, one of the things that they talked about was there's no such thing as
219
00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:51,800
good or bad.
220
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:59,640
And I started to see, I mean, the entire universe is like just paradox, you know, like all these
221
00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:03,000
I don't know what's the plural of paradise, paradise, paradise.
222
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:04,000
I don't know.
223
00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:05,000
Paradoxes.
224
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,560
Um, but the, and this is one of them.
225
00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:12,480
So yeah, there are things that are bad, you know, like if somebody comes and punches me
226
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:15,080
in the face, I'm not going to be like, Oh, that's a good thing.
227
00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:24,240
You know, but it's the, it's the choices and the meanings that we give to things that will
228
00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:27,760
determine the way that we react to and see them.
229
00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:32,280
And this entire energy shift that, that's kind of going on for both of us.
230
00:16:32,280 --> 00:16:33,280
It's almost like that.
231
00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:37,880
Like where for me, like I started to look at things, even though I'm doing what I want
232
00:16:37,880 --> 00:16:43,280
to do through a lens of negativity.
233
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:52,240
And now I'm looking at them through a lens of passion just by shifting some of the energy
234
00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:55,040
and some of the meanings that I give to things.
235
00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:56,040
Yeah.
236
00:16:56,040 --> 00:17:07,280
I think that lens or filter or whatever your word is for mindset, I guess, like that's
237
00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:10,800
where all your power is.
238
00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:17,680
That's where you can change things is up there in the place where you create your inner narrative
239
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:21,200
about what's happening in your life.
240
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:25,240
And it's not necessarily easy to do, but it's possible.
241
00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:31,880
And it's once you change it, it's like clicks in and you can see things differently.
242
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:38,280
And if, and if we're, if we're kind of addicted to comfort, that's not a place that will ever
243
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,280
go.
244
00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:40,280
Yeah.
245
00:17:40,280 --> 00:17:44,480
And that's because it is a very uncomfortable thing.
246
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,480
Yeah.
247
00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:50,960
You know, I remember reading from side gurus talking about the garden of Eden, you know,
248
00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:54,360
and then he said, so Adam and Eve, they're walking around and then they, you know, they
249
00:17:54,360 --> 00:17:55,720
fall into sin and all that.
250
00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:59,600
And he said, but they ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
251
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:04,120
And so for the first time, so before that, everything was good.
252
00:18:04,120 --> 00:18:08,240
You know, I mean, in, in, in Genesis one, when God created everything, like he finishes
253
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:12,680
like all these verses with, and God saw that it was good.
254
00:18:12,680 --> 00:18:16,360
So there was one meaning for everything good.
255
00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:17,360
Yeah.
256
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:21,520
When they eat of this fruit, which gives them the ability to put another meaning on there
257
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:24,800
are bad, good and evil.
258
00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:30,560
You know, so now when somebody in my comments says, no, you're wrong or you're fat or whatever
259
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:35,960
it is, I give a meaning to that, you know, oh, that's bad.
260
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:40,600
And that's, he said, that's where suffering comes in to the, to the human equation, being
261
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:45,320
able to give a meaning of bad to things.
262
00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:50,400
You know, like I said, I try to be careful because I mean, how many times you see like
263
00:18:50,400 --> 00:18:56,560
videos of like people in court, they're, they're, I just like started to see this one.
264
00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:01,520
I try not to watch these and stuff, but it was a father talking to the person that murdered
265
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:05,480
his daughter.
266
00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:15,440
You can't put a good spin on that, you know, but at the same time, like, I don't know.
267
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:25,400
I think that what it is, is that if you say, you know, if it's not bad, that doesn't mean
268
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:26,400
it's good.
269
00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,400
It's not one or the other, right?
270
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:34,720
So like a conversation that a dad's having with the murder of his daughter.
271
00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:40,680
If you take away the judgment of bad, it doesn't mean like, Oh, that means it must be good.
272
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:41,680
It just is.
273
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:42,680
Right.
274
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:49,680
Releasing yourself from the judgment of good or bad at all and saying like, this is happening.
275
00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:51,320
How's it moving through me?
276
00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:52,760
Where is it carving me out?
277
00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:56,240
How did this, and getting curious about other things.
278
00:19:56,240 --> 00:20:01,120
I think that's what's important, but it's hard because our brains are so trained to think
279
00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:09,000
good or bad that we don't even realize that we can not think either one.
280
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:13,800
It doesn't have to be judged at all.
281
00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:14,800
Yeah.
282
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:15,800
Yeah.
283
00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:19,440
Almost sort of like, you know, when I talk about when it comes down to like the decisions
284
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:24,280
we make end up being binary, yes or no.
285
00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:30,720
But there are at the same time, this massive spectrum in between.
286
00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:37,240
You know, one of the things that I love about math is that there is an infinite number of
287
00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:38,240
numbers.
288
00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:39,240
Right.
289
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:44,680
But then if you just take two, let's just take one and two in between one and two, there
290
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:50,040
is an infinite number of numbers, you know, and then if you take like one and one and
291
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:55,640
a half in between those two, there is an infinite number of numbers.
292
00:20:55,640 --> 00:21:01,960
And one of the things that I thought was so cool, and this was when I started having trouble
293
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:02,960
with math.
294
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,080
So it was like advanced algebra.
295
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:10,040
So like right before like calculus and I tried pre-calculus and big old freaking F on that
296
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:11,040
class dude.
297
00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:16,840
It was so, it was so hard, but I want to learn that stuff so bad, but they use this number
298
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:20,080
to letter E that symbolizes this number, sort of like pi.
299
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:21,400
It's one of those never ending numbers.
300
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:24,960
It's like 1.4, blah, blah, blah.
301
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:30,880
And the professor said we use E when we're approaching infinity.
302
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:36,880
So like on a graph, if we had a graph and like the curve came down and it kept approaching
303
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:42,760
that X line on the graph and it gets closer and closer and closer.
304
00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:46,720
Depending on where we are in our observation of it, it can look like it's touching, but
305
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:50,680
the closer we get to it, there's still a gap.
306
00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:56,560
And in one way, like we can never, we have to use that letter E because we can never
307
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,040
reach the infinite.
308
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:02,360
And then at the same time, we are infinite.
309
00:22:02,360 --> 00:22:08,280
So we're a part of infinity, but yet we're separated from infinity.
310
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:14,280
And it's like, it's that thing, you know, that ability.
311
00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:24,000
Dude, I don't even know how to like describe what I'm trying to get across, but that's
312
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:32,640
the ability like to me in those, in that dichotomy of truth, of reality, that's where the magic
313
00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:33,640
lies.
314
00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:37,080
Yes, I would agree.
315
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:42,200
Yeah, when you were talking, I was thinking that it's not that different with the good
316
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:43,800
bad judgment.
317
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:49,800
We have the judgment, but as we approach it, we realize, oh, it's actually not touching.
318
00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:50,960
It's not all good.
319
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:52,480
It's not all bad.
320
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:53,480
Yeah.
321
00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:58,760
That's that space that we're talking about, like where the judgment ceases to exist.
322
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:01,160
And it's just what's happening.
323
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:02,160
Yeah.
324
00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:03,160
Yeah.
325
00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:09,200
Like at the beginning of COVID, back when like they first put in the lockdowns and stuff,
326
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:14,200
Andy was driving on from work and somebody came up from driving the wrong way down a
327
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:19,000
one-way road, blew through a stop sign and T boner.
328
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:21,880
And so, and then took off.
329
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:26,040
So she called the cops and the cops were like, we're not coming out.
330
00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:27,040
Everybody's okay.
331
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,400
So because she was like, yeah, I'm okay.
332
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:29,400
She's like, they're like, everybody's okay.
333
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:30,840
So we're not coming out.
334
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:36,920
While she was on the phone with the cops, you heard the radios going off that there was
335
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:41,680
another hit and run and it was the same car.
336
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:49,120
So this lady running from Sandy ended up hitting somebody else and then ran from that.
337
00:23:49,120 --> 00:23:51,720
And so I like went right into old patterns.
338
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:52,720
I fled.
339
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:55,240
You know, I called the police department up.
340
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:59,560
I'm like, how can you not be going after this, you know, this person and all this like, what
341
00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:01,240
do you do, you know, stuff like that.
342
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:05,000
And to me, this was a bad thing.
343
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:10,480
You know, because now we're down to one car, you know, she needs it for work.
344
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:13,840
I'm going to be stuck in the house, which, you know, I mean, that's, that's like my,
345
00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:17,000
my, my place anyways, you know, all this stuff.
346
00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:21,560
But it ended up, we ended up like making a hundred bucks off that whole deal because
347
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:27,440
the car was totaled and then we ended up getting like this refund back and insurance and stuff.
348
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:32,240
And, and we've never bought another car.
349
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:36,040
You know, so the money that's been saved, because we realized we didn't, we like the
350
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:40,840
way that our, where we are in our lives right now, we don't need that.
351
00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:44,000
You know, so it turned out to be a good thing.
352
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:48,520
So yeah, it was bad in the moment, but it wasn't as bad as I made it out to be.
353
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:53,840
And then from this point, from this place of my observation, and that's the cool thing
354
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:58,960
about that study, the Nobel Prize, like it's all about the observer effect.
355
00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:03,200
You know, so what, what they found was if we're not observing something or something
356
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:07,920
that doesn't mean that that thing actually exists anymore, you know, it could be because
357
00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:15,560
it can exist in, in, in two, in not two places, but it can exist in like two ways at the same
358
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:21,160
time, like as a particle and as a wave, you know, and, and I wish I could explain it more,
359
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:25,600
but I'm going to learn.
360
00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:26,600
And that's the thing.
361
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:28,880
There's, there's a, there's a spectrum to good.
362
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,680
There's a spectrum to bad.
363
00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:31,680
Yeah.
364
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:38,520
You know what I was thinking about when you were talking is I've always loved the idea
365
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:46,200
that all time is happening at the same time, that it's not as linear as we think it is.
366
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:48,960
And that's kind of the truth in this too, right?
367
00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:54,760
If you choose a moment that's good or bad, this person is this way.
368
00:25:54,760 --> 00:26:00,440
But if you look at the whole of something, then it's not good or bad.
369
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:06,080
And I was thinking about that not only with your reaction to the car, but when you called
370
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:10,480
the police and you were yelling out of like, get down here, blah, blah, they might have
371
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:19,520
thought this man is ex angry on hand, but they're only capturing you for a moment.
372
00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:21,160
Yes.
373
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:27,640
And so I think it's so important with ourselves and others to realize judgment is happening
374
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:33,760
in a specific moment that we see something and we're not seeing the whole of it in that
375
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:35,760
way.
376
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:40,960
Dude, that, that blows my mind a little bit.
377
00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:50,160
Imagine if more people began to incorporate that thinking, you know, so when I see a video
378
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:53,800
of somebody and I'm like, this person is a freaking idiot.
379
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:55,200
What they're saying is stupid.
380
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:56,640
It's so wrong.
381
00:26:56,640 --> 00:27:03,440
But understanding that that is a 30 second to three minute moment of their life.
382
00:27:03,440 --> 00:27:10,280
And I'm judging the entirety of their life off of a 30 second moment.
383
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:11,280
Yes.
384
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:12,280
Yes.
385
00:27:12,280 --> 00:27:19,120
That's what you made me think when you were talking about that is like, Oh, I get it.
386
00:27:19,120 --> 00:27:20,400
That's why it doesn't work.
387
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:21,800
It's not whole.
388
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:33,320
It's not complete to make a moment judgment like that.
389
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:38,840
It just brings me back to like my roots and in Christianity and stuff like where I wonder
390
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:43,200
if that's where, where when Jesus was telling like, judge not let's be judged, you know,
391
00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:44,840
like that's the reason.
392
00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:50,440
Yeah, I saw a post the other day that you just reminded me of that I wanted to ask your
393
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:56,840
thoughts about it said something like when Jesus said that he was going to return or
394
00:27:56,840 --> 00:28:03,440
this concept of Christ consciousness, that it didn't mean that it was going to be in
395
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:10,840
one person that it meant that Christ consciousness would be in all people or many people.
396
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:18,520
Like the idea of the return of Christ, this person was thinking was like just everybody
397
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:25,040
evolving to being enlightened, I guess, for lack of a better word.
398
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:29,840
And I'd never heard that sort of interpretation of the return of Christ.
399
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,840
And I was like, huh, that's interesting.
400
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:33,840
Yeah.
401
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:34,840
Yeah.
402
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:38,360
I've started seeing a little bit about that.
403
00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:48,120
I saw a really cool video on anti Christ and with that Christ consciousness people that
404
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:56,200
act in ways that are contradictory to Jesus to the Christ are anti Christ, you know, in
405
00:28:56,200 --> 00:29:02,720
the same way, you know, so I grew up in they were like literalists, you know, so you're
406
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:09,440
at the 6000 years old, Jesus spoke everything to or God spoke everything to existence on
407
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:12,480
the, you know, in the six days rested on the seven.
408
00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:18,040
So everything in the Bible is absolutely literal.
409
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:24,600
The funny thing is though, is like there are some verses that they take more as metaphorical,
410
00:29:24,600 --> 00:29:27,560
even though they're literalists, you know, like the verse that says like, if you have
411
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:31,000
the faith of a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, get up and remove yourself
412
00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:35,040
into the sea and they're like, well, of course, you know, you're not going to do, but why?
413
00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:36,040
Right.
414
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:37,480
Why can't we do that?
415
00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:43,480
If the Bible says that we can do that, if we have that faith, then why can't we do that?
416
00:29:43,480 --> 00:29:49,640
You know, or is our faith lacking even the greatest of our faith, you know, those that
417
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,840
we like, oh, they're great in the faith are so close to God.
418
00:29:52,840 --> 00:29:57,720
Is their faith lacking so much that it's less than a mustard seed, which I was always taught
419
00:29:57,720 --> 00:30:02,280
as like the smallest seed that is out there.
420
00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:08,680
So I always took, always learned the return of Jesus was quite literal.
421
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:14,480
At some point, and I remember too, like as a kid, looking up, being like, oh, it's cloudy,
422
00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:17,360
because, because the Biosyn were going to be caught up into the clouds.
423
00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:21,000
And I'm like, am I going to, am I about to hear a trumpet?
424
00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:24,680
You know, and then we're going to be caught up.
425
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:27,700
And that's, and that's going to be the second coming in Jesus, you know.
426
00:30:27,700 --> 00:30:30,200
And then the tribulation is going to go on earth.
427
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:39,800
We're going to be judged as Christians, which seemed to be like we're, God's going to shame
428
00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:44,040
us for all the sin that we did, but then still let us in, you know, like you're still, you're
429
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:45,920
still good.
430
00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:50,280
And then he's going to come back and, and with the battle of Armageddon and destroy like
431
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:54,560
all the armies of the earth and lock up the devil and the, and the bottomless pit for
432
00:30:54,560 --> 00:30:56,600
a thousand years, all that stuff.
433
00:30:56,600 --> 00:31:01,720
But learning more about that Christ consciousness, there's always a verse that confused me, you
434
00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:07,120
know, because one of the things you always heard is like, I always heard is, I remember
435
00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:10,320
this one preacher, he was talking, he was like, somebody said to me, church is full
436
00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:11,320
of hypocrites.
437
00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:12,960
And I said to him, yes, it is.
438
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:14,480
And there's always room for one more.
439
00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:21,400
And he was like, like, oh, yeah, that's true, you know, but there's this verse again that
440
00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:23,480
doesn't get talked about a lot.
441
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:29,720
It says, let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus.
442
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:31,560
Yeah.
443
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:36,360
And we're talking about the mind, not, not the brain, but the mind.
444
00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:37,360
Right.
445
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:40,800
Consciousness.
446
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:46,680
So is that, is that saying we should have that Christ consciousness instead of saying
447
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:48,200
like Christians aren't perfect.
448
00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:49,600
They're just forgiven.
449
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:50,600
Okay.
450
00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:51,600
Great.
451
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:54,160
But try better.
452
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:55,400
Yeah.
453
00:31:55,400 --> 00:31:59,720
And don't go, don't go contradictory to your God.
454
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:00,840
Yeah.
455
00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:04,680
You know, all right, a little rambling thought, like just another.
456
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:08,720
So and I've talked about this a lot, but you know, when Jesus said, the greatest commandment
457
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:11,480
is to love the Lord, thy God with all that heart, all that mind, all that soul.
458
00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:15,800
And so the second is as into the first love that neighbor as I self in another gospel,
459
00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:18,360
it just says the greatest commandment is to love that neighbor as myself.
460
00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:23,440
And then I believe in one of the letters from Paul, he said, all of the commandments are
461
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:26,960
summed up in this one thing.
462
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:29,200
Love thy neighbor as I saw.
463
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:34,720
So when people go back to the biblical law and, and, and the Old Testament commandments
464
00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:38,960
and stuff, it's all summed up for us in one thing.
465
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:41,560
Love thy neighbor as thyself.
466
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,560
Yeah.
467
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:44,880
Yeah.
468
00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:58,240
I have to say that as I have spent more time on social media and put more things out there,
469
00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:09,360
this is my experience that people who identify as sort of right religious Republican and
470
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:10,360
those are all just labels.
471
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:12,600
I get it.
472
00:33:12,600 --> 00:33:21,480
There's so much name calling and disparaging and meanness and boldness.
473
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:26,920
And it's really broken my heart, you know, as I've interacted with social media, because
474
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:28,760
again, this is a sweeping generalization.
475
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,120
It's just my experience.
476
00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:38,440
I don't see that from people who are more non religious, left leaning liberal.
477
00:33:38,440 --> 00:33:43,880
And as I see things play out on my page, it makes me really sad that the group that you
478
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:57,040
would expect to be living from love isn't, they're not showing that as a whole, I think.
479
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:59,200
Yeah.
480
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:05,960
I've seen some videos of more liberal leaning.
481
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:06,960
I mean, not even more.
482
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:11,640
I mean, very far left liberal leaning people.
483
00:34:11,640 --> 00:34:17,240
There was a class that was being filmed where it was like a college course where they were
484
00:34:17,240 --> 00:34:18,760
learning how to protest.
485
00:34:18,760 --> 00:34:20,920
It was like a political science thing.
486
00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:26,360
And so the professor was giving right wing talking points.
487
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:33,000
And what he was teaching the students was how to out screen what he was saying.
488
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:38,200
And it was all hatred.
489
00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:47,760
And so I think when we, when we identify with those labels to the point of this is, this
490
00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:52,440
is right, you know, back to that dichotomy, this is right and this is wrong.
491
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:58,880
You take all that on and then anything that is outside of your box is a threat.
492
00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:07,120
You know, the one thing I do know about at least the people that are on either side,
493
00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:09,120
they want a good country.
494
00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:11,000
They want a safe country.
495
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:14,880
They want a country that's flourishing, you know.
496
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:22,240
So if we could drop these dumb ass labels that I truly believe like people are using
497
00:35:22,240 --> 00:35:28,800
to keep us divided, you know, because there's no reason why we should be.
498
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:34,160
We're not going to be a servient to a very small group, the 1%, you know, because I
499
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:35,960
mean, we just, we have the numbers.
500
00:35:35,960 --> 00:35:37,960
We are the people.
501
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:38,960
Yeah.
502
00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:39,960
Yeah.
503
00:35:39,960 --> 00:35:46,480
But they use that division to keep us fighting each other instead of, instead of the real
504
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:52,120
fight, you know, the real wrong that's going on.
505
00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:57,840
So but when it comes to Christians and I've known, I've known a few, there's this one
506
00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:01,640
guy, he's, he's Africa, he's from Africa.
507
00:36:01,640 --> 00:36:02,760
His name is Johannes.
508
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:06,680
He is probably the best human being I've ever met on this earth.
509
00:36:06,680 --> 00:36:07,680
And he's a missionary.
510
00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:11,120
He runs a school for deaf kids in Africa with his wife.
511
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:12,720
And that came from him.
512
00:36:12,720 --> 00:36:20,160
So that I guess where he is, the, if you're deaf, you're basically just considered like
513
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:21,160
a non-human.
514
00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:24,720
They won't even give you a name because you can't hear it.
515
00:36:24,720 --> 00:36:26,200
So why, why give you a name?
516
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:31,240
And he had like five kids that were deaf outside of his house that were eating grass because
517
00:36:31,240 --> 00:36:35,040
their families wouldn't feed them and just basically got rid of them like, like, like
518
00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:37,200
a stray animal.
519
00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:39,360
And so he, him and his wife began to feed them.
520
00:36:39,360 --> 00:36:45,360
And then that grew into this school for the deaf that now has like 500 students and they,
521
00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:50,040
you know, they, they feed them, they, they clothe them like everything.
522
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:55,840
And this guy is the kindest, happiest, most joy filled man I've ever met in my life.
523
00:36:55,840 --> 00:37:02,600
I've never heard him once utter like a single negative word to anyone.
524
00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:12,800
I'm sure he has, but for the most part, I don't, I don't get the idea of Christianity
525
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:17,880
becoming like the world police of what's right and what's wrong.
526
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:23,600
You know, cause cause what, what I remember, we were give Jesus after he died and stuff
527
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:28,600
gave us the great commission, which is go out into the world preaching the gospel.
528
00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:33,960
And I was always taught the gospel means the good news.
529
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:38,600
So then I'm turning around and which is the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus, which
530
00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:45,280
he did for us for, because of his mercy so that we can be saved because there's nothing
531
00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:47,080
that we can do to get to heaven.
532
00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:51,240
But we've turned that into let me attack the sin.
533
00:37:51,240 --> 00:37:56,000
And then with these little cliches of hate the sin, love the center, but why do you always
534
00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:57,480
attack the sin?
535
00:37:57,480 --> 00:37:58,480
Yeah.
536
00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:02,600
Why can't you love the center and let God take care of that?
537
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:03,600
Yeah.
538
00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:05,880
Just do what he said to do.
539
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:10,520
And then when I saw that video, I'm like, wow, there is a lot of anti Christ consciousness
540
00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:16,440
within Christianity because it's been twisted and perverted to be a tool for control instead
541
00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:19,880
of the tool for freedom that God intended it to be in my opinion.
542
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:20,880
Yeah.
543
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:26,120
That's funny because it's really just going back to the vibration conversation that we
544
00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:32,080
started with where it's like the vibration that you're in is everything.
545
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:35,640
Like it doesn't matter what your words are saying.
546
00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:41,880
If you're in judgment, if you're in hatred, whatever it is, that's what's present in the
547
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:46,000
moment and that's what's communicating the most.
548
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:47,000
Yes.
549
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:54,880
I'm going to quote, I really love and it says something like preach everywhere you go.
550
00:38:54,880 --> 00:39:00,000
And when you have to use your words or something like that, right?
551
00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:07,480
Like saying like your energy and your life, who you are is how you preach to people.
552
00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:10,720
You are loving, you are compassionate, right?
553
00:39:10,720 --> 00:39:12,280
I love that.
554
00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:18,680
Those words just aren't that effective, right? We rely on them as if they're everything
555
00:39:18,680 --> 00:39:22,920
and they're the only way we can communicate with each other.
556
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:30,320
Energetic communication is really powerful, but we don't spend time being intentional
557
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:31,920
about that, I think.
558
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:32,920
Yeah.
559
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:35,800
I mean, because the energy does not come from our actions.
560
00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:38,360
The actions are a result of the energy.
561
00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:40,600
The energy comes from our intentions.
562
00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:42,600
Yes.
563
00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:43,600
Yes.
564
00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:49,160
And the one thing that I learned as a kid growing up from like my earliest memory being
565
00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:55,760
in Sunday school and then go into a Christian school, church Sunday morning, Sunday night,
566
00:39:55,760 --> 00:40:01,400
Wednesday night, Friday, Friday or Saturday youth group meetings, not being able to have
567
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:08,040
girlfriends or close friends outside of the church, you know, stuff like that is that
568
00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:15,440
I learned very early on how to play a game, how to put on an act, how to put on a presentation
569
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:20,840
of what I should look like, where inside my intentions were the exact opposite of the character
570
00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:21,840
I was playing.
571
00:40:21,840 --> 00:40:22,840
Yes.
572
00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:32,240
And I remember one time, my brother, he would never let me go out with him, you know, and
573
00:40:32,240 --> 00:40:34,320
then one day he was like, hey, you want to go to the mall with me?
574
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:36,520
And I was like, oh my, wow.
575
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:38,240
Yeah, because he could drive.
576
00:40:38,240 --> 00:40:39,400
I was like, he's the coolest dude.
577
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:40,920
I'm like, all right, cool.
578
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:44,200
So we went to the mall and it turned out like he had this plane is going to do some shop
579
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:46,280
lift and I was going to be his lookout.
580
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:49,440
So the only reason why he wanted me to come was to be his lookout.
581
00:40:49,440 --> 00:40:55,720
And I was a horrible lookout because looking back, I saw the undercover dude watching me.
582
00:40:55,720 --> 00:41:00,120
Like, I mean, this dude was like, like just giving me the eye.
583
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:02,840
Like, I was like, why does this guy hate me?
584
00:41:02,840 --> 00:41:05,400
You know, because like I just saw him, he was at a rock and he was just looking at me
585
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:08,680
like I'm going to kill you, you know, and I'm like, what is wrong with this dude?
586
00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:12,480
Like, I should have known like, all right, he's onto us, you know.
587
00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:17,360
But so as we're walking out of the store, the same guy comes running up, grabs my brother,
588
00:41:17,360 --> 00:41:20,000
grabs me and my brother's like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
589
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:22,000
And then he goes, oh, wait, I don't know him.
590
00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:23,000
He's not.
591
00:41:23,000 --> 00:41:24,000
I'm like, you moron.
592
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:26,680
Like you just said, I'm sorry to me.
593
00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:30,480
Now you're telling these dude that he's that I'm not with them, right?
594
00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:34,240
So we had to go.
595
00:41:34,240 --> 00:41:40,240
So the deacons of our church made us cut off all communication with any of our friends.
596
00:41:40,240 --> 00:41:47,000
We weren't allowed to talk to any of our friends because we were very dangerous, sinful, demonic
597
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:49,080
kids.
598
00:41:49,080 --> 00:41:53,280
And we had to go in and there was 12 deacons and I guess they were supposed to represent
599
00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:58,680
the 12 apostles or something and the pastor who was, you know, I guess Jesus.
600
00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:04,840
And we had to convince them that we were pented.
601
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:10,040
And my brother came out of his meeting and he was like, I just told him, I'm sorry.
602
00:42:10,040 --> 00:42:11,880
I know what I did was wrong.
603
00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:13,040
And this list of things.
604
00:42:13,040 --> 00:42:14,320
And I'm like, oh, okay, cool.
605
00:42:14,320 --> 00:42:16,520
So I went in and said literally the same exact thing.
606
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:17,520
I'm sorry.
607
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:18,520
I know I was wrong.
608
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:22,280
I've the worst part is I made God mad or I disappointed God.
609
00:42:22,280 --> 00:42:23,960
I disappointed my church.
610
00:42:23,960 --> 00:42:26,680
I disappointed my parents.
611
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:29,640
And I'm very repentive of that.
612
00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:34,480
And they were like, okay, okay, we're going to watch you, but we believe you.
613
00:42:34,480 --> 00:42:39,000
And inside I'm like, you guys are fucking idiots.
614
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:47,200
You know, I looking back, I had a strong dislike for every single one of those people.
615
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:48,880
I didn't want anything to do with them.
616
00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:50,640
I didn't want to be like them.
617
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:53,320
I didn't think they were role models for how I should be.
618
00:42:53,320 --> 00:43:00,880
Like they just disgust at me, but so my intention was not what it was, but they accepted the
619
00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:01,880
fakeness.
620
00:43:01,880 --> 00:43:02,880
Yeah.
621
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:14,000
And there's so much of that, just the open acceptance of outright fakeness in religion.
622
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,160
And politics and everything.
623
00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:17,160
Yes.
624
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:18,160
Yes.
625
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:26,000
And I don't know how to be fake or mask, you cannot be successful in a lot of areas of
626
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:30,440
our culture because it's required to do that.
627
00:43:30,440 --> 00:43:31,440
Yeah.
628
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:34,920
And that's really sad.
629
00:43:34,920 --> 00:43:41,000
Yeah, I remember I had a boss once and she was, she was cool.
630
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:42,920
Me and her started off good.
631
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:46,720
And then the way we ended wasn't so good.
632
00:43:46,720 --> 00:43:54,040
But she was big into the fake it to you make it mentality.
633
00:43:54,040 --> 00:44:03,960
And one of the things that I saw was that the way that she talked was always very negative.
634
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:08,960
But when other people came around, boom, she's like bubbly.
635
00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:10,280
She's like, life is amazing.
636
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:15,680
I love every, you know, and I'm like, dude, you were just bitching about all of this stuff.
637
00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:17,880
And now someone came in and you're completely different.
638
00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:23,480
And that really reminded me of growing up in that Christian bubble.
639
00:44:23,480 --> 00:44:25,960
You know, and I think that's the danger of the fake it to you make it.
640
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:29,800
I mean, one of the things to learn in the military is you train or you fight how you
641
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:30,800
train.
642
00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:37,600
So if you, if you keep, all you're going to do is train yourself to be fake.
643
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:41,320
And again, it's one of those paradoxes because it's stepping into the reality of who that
644
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:43,480
person is.
645
00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:45,080
And then my mind is like, well, isn't that faking?
646
00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:46,720
Like, no, it's being.
647
00:44:46,720 --> 00:44:47,720
Yes.
648
00:44:47,720 --> 00:44:54,240
And it's such a small distinction, but the past they bring you on are massive.
649
00:44:54,240 --> 00:44:56,320
They're so massively different.
650
00:44:56,320 --> 00:44:57,320
Yes.
651
00:44:57,320 --> 00:44:58,320
Yeah.
652
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:04,080
And there's not, I guess I have not found language yet to describe that difference to
653
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:06,600
someone who doesn't know it.
654
00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:07,600
Yeah.
655
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:14,800
You know, because you're right, you do have to step into being a different version of
656
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:23,400
yourself and that takes effort and some sort of force or impetus, but it's not faking.
657
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:25,880
Faking is something different than that.
658
00:45:25,880 --> 00:45:30,720
And how to describe those two to someone I don't know.
659
00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:31,720
Yeah.
660
00:45:31,720 --> 00:45:38,120
So like, like for me, like the faking is, is again, internally, intentionally, I know
661
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:44,280
I'm this way, but I'm going to pretend for you, for somebody else to be this way.
662
00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:46,600
So I don't know, maybe that's what it is.
663
00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:50,520
Maybe like the faking to you make it is all about living for other people's perceptions
664
00:45:50,520 --> 00:45:55,080
of how you are, which is contradictory to how you actually are.
665
00:45:55,080 --> 00:46:01,760
And then being is for you, for the person, I'm going to be this way.
666
00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:04,480
My intention is to be this way.
667
00:46:04,480 --> 00:46:05,480
Yes.
668
00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:08,960
Regardless of what, who sees or what other people think.
669
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:09,960
Yeah.
670
00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:10,960
Yes.
671
00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:12,840
That is beautifully said.
672
00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:14,960
I think that's so good.
673
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:22,560
I also want to say that I think sometimes when somebody has a really big unhealed wound
674
00:46:22,560 --> 00:46:30,360
or childhood or something that they can be faking it without even really being aware
675
00:46:30,360 --> 00:46:32,200
that they're doing it.
676
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:33,200
Yes.
677
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:34,200
Yes.
678
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:41,800
Just, just playing out what's been programmed into them thoughts, feelings, thoughts, feelings.
679
00:46:41,800 --> 00:46:48,920
And that's why it's so hard to awaken because you, there's a point at which you don't even
680
00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:54,440
know that you're doing that to yourself, that you're faking it.
681
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:55,440
Yeah.
682
00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:56,440
Yeah.
683
00:46:56,440 --> 00:46:59,920
And that's, that's why I was stuck for 20 years.
684
00:46:59,920 --> 00:47:00,920
Yes.
685
00:47:00,920 --> 00:47:02,320
Because that was my reality.
686
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:06,880
I, I, I didn't know any of this stuff.
687
00:47:06,880 --> 00:47:15,320
I didn't know it's possible to be a different way, but this is just who I am.
688
00:47:15,320 --> 00:47:19,720
You know, and so it kept me stuck for the longest time.
689
00:47:19,720 --> 00:47:25,000
And then even when I began to realize, and I started, when I remember when I started
690
00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:32,840
this coaching business, because I had COVID like right after I launched and it kind of
691
00:47:32,840 --> 00:47:40,040
coincided with a three year panic attack where I was having heart palpitations.
692
00:47:40,040 --> 00:47:43,680
And then with all the, some of the side effects of COVID up in the large heart and then, you
693
00:47:43,680 --> 00:47:47,200
know, some of the evidence of the vaccines, you know, stuff like that, you know, and then
694
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:50,240
of course people, when I'm talking about this, people are telling me, oh, it's because of
695
00:47:50,240 --> 00:47:55,280
what, in fact, my doctor at the VA, my, my shrink at the VA told me it's, it's that,
696
00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:57,720
that is a side effect of COVID is heart palpitations.
697
00:47:57,720 --> 00:48:00,160
And from my guess, some studies it is.
698
00:48:00,160 --> 00:48:02,800
And then other, you know, people on social media like, oh, it's because of the vaccine,
699
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:07,440
you know, or whatever, you know, so what he has there, there, there are reasons why, but
700
00:48:07,440 --> 00:48:14,280
I think it really came down to, because I was, I was recognizing that I can be a different
701
00:48:14,280 --> 00:48:15,280
way.
702
00:48:15,280 --> 00:48:18,000
My intention was to be that way, but I wasn't practiced.
703
00:48:18,000 --> 00:48:22,520
I wasn't fluent in this new language that I was trying to live.
704
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:23,520
Yeah.
705
00:48:23,520 --> 00:48:25,040
The energetic language.
706
00:48:25,040 --> 00:48:26,040
Yes.
707
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:27,040
Yes.
708
00:48:27,040 --> 00:48:28,040
Yes.
709
00:48:28,040 --> 00:48:29,040
So I was still.
710
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:32,320
I felt that I was faking it.
711
00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:33,320
Yes.
712
00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:34,320
Yeah.
713
00:48:34,320 --> 00:48:35,320
Yeah.
714
00:48:35,320 --> 00:48:44,960
I know for me, when I look back at, when I was in that, it's also when I thought everything
715
00:48:44,960 --> 00:48:48,560
I thought was true, like 100% true.
716
00:48:48,560 --> 00:48:49,760
I know the truth.
717
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:52,160
What my thoughts tell me is true.
718
00:48:52,160 --> 00:48:56,800
So if my thought tells me that you really don't like me and you're just pretending, I'm just
719
00:48:56,800 --> 00:48:59,760
going to believe that I'm not going to investigate it with you.
720
00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:07,480
I'm not going to write because I have an arrogance about how true my thoughts are.
721
00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:15,640
And for me, letting go of that was the key to like the beginning of my personal growth,
722
00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:18,320
like intentional personal growth and development.
723
00:49:18,320 --> 00:49:19,320
Yeah.
724
00:49:19,320 --> 00:49:20,320
Yeah.
725
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:21,320
That's that.
726
00:49:21,320 --> 00:49:22,320
Yeah.
727
00:49:22,320 --> 00:49:23,320
That's the dude.
728
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:31,080
That hits the nail on the head, man, because I just thinking about it, that was the beginning
729
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:36,720
of that change for me when I began to realize that I have consciousness and that my thoughts
730
00:49:36,720 --> 00:49:38,280
are not my consciousness.
731
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:39,280
Yes.
732
00:49:39,280 --> 00:49:45,320
Like consciousness is the observer of my thoughts, like Eckhart Tolle talks about.
733
00:49:45,320 --> 00:49:51,480
And if we are the observer of something, that means that we are not that thing.
734
00:49:51,480 --> 00:49:53,080
So I am not my thoughts.
735
00:49:53,080 --> 00:49:55,600
And then all of a sudden I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
736
00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:56,600
You know what I mean?
737
00:49:56,600 --> 00:50:00,920
Like heart palpitations, anxiety attacks all day long.
738
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:05,120
You know, and then of course I'm trying to change how I'm feeling because I'm still in
739
00:50:05,120 --> 00:50:07,400
that old programming of I don't like how I'm feeling.
740
00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:08,400
This is uncomfortable.
741
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:09,760
I want to feel comfortable.
742
00:50:09,760 --> 00:50:11,800
So I'm going knee deep in a bag of Doritos.
743
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:13,040
You know what I mean?
744
00:50:13,040 --> 00:50:18,880
I'm doing like all these things, even using cannabis and stuff to change how I feel in
745
00:50:18,880 --> 00:50:19,880
the moment.
746
00:50:19,880 --> 00:50:26,400
You know, but that was one of the things that kind of helped me too is using cannabis in
747
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:31,760
those moments because it let me, one of the things cannabis does, and this is from Phil
748
00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:35,000
Lombardo, the psychologist in the Stanford prison experiment.
749
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:40,680
He did another 20 year like study on time and he wrote this book called The Time Paradox.
750
00:50:40,680 --> 00:50:45,720
And this is a little blurb in there about how cannabis makes us introspective.
751
00:50:45,720 --> 00:50:53,200
And so I started using that and I'm going in on myself and not, I didn't know what I
752
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:55,600
had to deal with.
753
00:50:55,600 --> 00:51:01,000
So instead of keeping my focus on all those questions of what is wrong with me, I started
754
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:09,640
focusing on gratitude and love and joy and the beauty and the wonder of everything around
755
00:51:09,640 --> 00:51:13,080
me, of life itself.
756
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:16,760
You know, and I've gotten into the stink like Sandy makes fun of me because you know, I
757
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:18,880
don't know, do you guys have stink bugs out West?
758
00:51:18,880 --> 00:51:20,120
I don't know what they're actually called.
759
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:21,120
We call them stink bugs.
760
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:23,920
They're like these little weird looking things.
761
00:51:23,920 --> 00:51:25,840
It's almost like geometric.
762
00:51:25,840 --> 00:51:28,080
It's all these sharp lines and stuff.
763
00:51:28,080 --> 00:51:29,280
They don't sting you or anything.
764
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:33,920
I don't even know why they call them stink bugs, but because I've never, they don't
765
00:51:33,920 --> 00:51:37,720
stink, but we get them like they come in our house sometime, you know, we get them in and
766
00:51:37,720 --> 00:51:42,800
before I'd always just grab a tissue or something or a paper towel, grab it, crush it, flush
767
00:51:42,800 --> 00:51:43,800
it, right?
768
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:47,320
Even with spiders, because spiders scare the shit out of me.
769
00:51:47,320 --> 00:51:49,760
Oh my God.
770
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:55,280
But what I've been doing lately is, is gently like letting them crawl on my finger and bringing
771
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:57,920
them outside.
772
00:51:57,920 --> 00:52:01,600
And I'm like, I don't know why that I'm like, I'm making fun of like this is so stupid.
773
00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:04,520
It's a bug, you know, but then there's another part of my brain.
774
00:52:04,520 --> 00:52:08,240
It's like, yes, but it's alive.
775
00:52:08,240 --> 00:52:14,360
You know, so just my, my respect for life, you know, and I'm not saying somebody that
776
00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:18,440
steps on a spider that's in their house is a bad person, but I'm just saying like my
777
00:52:18,440 --> 00:52:22,480
respect for life has grown where I don't want to do that anymore.
778
00:52:22,480 --> 00:52:23,480
Yeah.
779
00:52:23,480 --> 00:52:24,480
Yeah.
780
00:52:24,480 --> 00:52:26,400
I think that's so beautiful.
781
00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:30,000
You know what's interesting when you were talking and you said cannabis helped you become
782
00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:35,820
introspective so that you could start to unwind your own puzzle.
783
00:52:35,820 --> 00:52:39,040
You know what I think I used is suffering.
784
00:52:39,040 --> 00:52:44,040
I think suffering causes you to be introspective.
785
00:52:44,040 --> 00:52:45,040
Yeah.
786
00:52:45,040 --> 00:52:46,040
Yeah.
787
00:52:46,040 --> 00:52:48,080
I agree with that.
788
00:52:48,080 --> 00:52:58,040
I know that like, you know, when I was maybe like 15 to 25, I purposely, I used to call
789
00:52:58,040 --> 00:53:00,760
it spraying my dirt into mud.
790
00:53:00,760 --> 00:53:10,080
I'd purposely make things difficult, more heavy because the suffering made me feel deep
791
00:53:10,080 --> 00:53:12,600
and introspective.
792
00:53:12,600 --> 00:53:19,640
And then there was a process for me where I had to give that up as the tool I was using.
793
00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:25,160
But from, I think that actually in a way helped me get there, right?
794
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:26,160
It helped.
795
00:53:26,160 --> 00:53:32,440
I think I was able to get to who I wanted to become because there's a point at which
796
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:34,960
suffering is just fed up, right?
797
00:53:34,960 --> 00:53:36,960
And it goes, I'll just, right.
798
00:53:36,960 --> 00:53:37,960
Yeah.
799
00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:41,560
And it starts to look for something outside the box.
800
00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:49,400
How did you not become identified with your suffering where like, that's just who I am.
801
00:53:49,400 --> 00:53:50,400
That's me.
802
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:52,840
Like I'm like almost like that victim mentality.
803
00:53:52,840 --> 00:53:54,240
Oh, I was.
804
00:53:54,240 --> 00:53:55,240
I was.
805
00:53:55,240 --> 00:54:03,160
And I started doing a lot of therapy and personal development work and life coaching.
806
00:54:03,160 --> 00:54:08,680
And I went to this week long intensive, like personal development, you know, you're going
807
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:11,320
to shed stuff, find your stuff.
808
00:54:11,320 --> 00:54:17,360
And the very first meeting we got there and the instructor, the leader said, okay, I want
809
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:21,840
you all to know, we're not going to tell our sad stories this week.
810
00:54:21,840 --> 00:54:30,480
And I was so disappointed because my story was everything like deep about me and the
811
00:54:30,480 --> 00:54:37,160
reason why people would like me and they'd see how wise I was when I shared my victim
812
00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:38,160
story.
813
00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:43,600
And like, I think it almost, it's kind of like a, you know, the Christianity is like
814
00:54:43,600 --> 00:54:46,600
the martyrdom of like turn the other cheek.
815
00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:47,600
Yeah.
816
00:54:47,600 --> 00:54:52,960
And when I was married to my drug addict husband, I was like, oh, I always can turn
817
00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:53,960
the other cheek.
818
00:54:53,960 --> 00:54:55,440
I can be so kind.
819
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:56,440
Look at me.
820
00:54:56,440 --> 00:54:57,440
Right.
821
00:54:57,440 --> 00:55:02,720
Like there was something about this suffering that made me feel holy and better than people
822
00:55:02,720 --> 00:55:03,720
and introspective.
823
00:55:03,720 --> 00:55:08,800
Like it was just a tool that I used for so long.
824
00:55:08,800 --> 00:55:13,400
And I think finally, like after this course, when I started doing deeper work that didn't
825
00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:16,920
involve my sad story.
826
00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:20,960
I was able to release it.
827
00:55:20,960 --> 00:55:25,920
But I think there's a lot of people that are sort of addicted to their own suffering.
828
00:55:25,920 --> 00:55:26,920
Yes.
829
00:55:26,920 --> 00:55:27,920
Yeah.
830
00:55:27,920 --> 00:55:34,480
And, and it gets into like, you know, tricky waters because, you know, people are like,
831
00:55:34,480 --> 00:55:39,160
oh, like if you, if you, if you say that, you know, like the, the, they can come back
832
00:55:39,160 --> 00:55:43,120
with, you know, you're minimizing what I've been through.
833
00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:44,760
No.
834
00:55:44,760 --> 00:55:49,120
But that identifying with just our suffering is minimized.
835
00:55:49,120 --> 00:55:55,120
It's ourselves minimizing our own lives because, you know, for me, like the four years in the
836
00:55:55,120 --> 00:56:01,920
military identify, I mean that, that control 20 years of my life.
837
00:56:01,920 --> 00:56:06,880
You know, so I paid a higher price than I should have because I began to identify with
838
00:56:06,880 --> 00:56:11,280
my suffering, especially when you're getting like, when I started going to school and I
839
00:56:11,280 --> 00:56:15,360
was in my, my writing classes and I was writing about the military.
840
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:19,160
Cause this is when I was trying, it was beginning to unwind myself.
841
00:56:19,160 --> 00:56:25,280
The feedback I got, I was like, dude, everybody loves me because they think I'm, I've been
842
00:56:25,280 --> 00:56:26,280
through so much.
843
00:56:26,280 --> 00:56:27,280
This is awesome.
844
00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:31,400
You know, so I'm getting all this positive feedback from my negative experience, you
845
00:56:31,400 --> 00:56:34,760
know, it helps me keep connected to that.
846
00:56:34,760 --> 00:56:40,200
You know, but like you would put a post up and, and somebody said like, nobody wants
847
00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:42,600
a guy that's just crying all the time.
848
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:43,600
It's like, no shit.
849
00:56:43,600 --> 00:56:44,600
Right.
850
00:56:44,600 --> 00:56:48,440
Like no one wants a partner that's crying all the time.
851
00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:49,440
Right.
852
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:50,440
Yeah.
853
00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:53,440
I mean, dude, we flew, we flew to Italy man, you know, and, and I was just thinking like,
854
00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:57,560
if there was a baby on that plane, I would be praying, please let us be on a Boeing,
855
00:56:57,560 --> 00:57:02,120
you know, cause I just want that door to come flying off, you know, and the crying is gone.
856
00:57:02,120 --> 00:57:03,120
You know what I mean?
857
00:57:03,120 --> 00:57:10,120
Like, like nobody wants to listen to that negativity, all that, that, that long it gets
858
00:57:10,120 --> 00:57:15,000
old, it gets tiring because it saps me of my energy.
859
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:16,000
Yes.
860
00:57:16,000 --> 00:57:17,000
Yes.
861
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:20,120
You know, but, but it is addictive.
862
00:57:20,120 --> 00:57:21,120
Yeah.
863
00:57:21,120 --> 00:57:27,000
Hold on, cause you made me think of something.
864
00:57:27,000 --> 00:57:33,240
So, you know, I posted that video on Tik Tok, which brought a lot of men to the surface
865
00:57:33,240 --> 00:57:38,600
of my awareness saying that they cannot be vulnerable with women.
866
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:45,600
And I didn't think about this until just now.
867
00:57:45,600 --> 00:57:51,680
They might have a different definition of vulnerability than I do.
868
00:57:51,680 --> 00:57:53,180
Because you're right.
869
00:57:53,180 --> 00:57:59,960
If what they're labeling vulnerability is what I would label complaining or dwelling, that,
870
00:57:59,960 --> 00:58:02,080
that, that's true.
871
00:58:02,080 --> 00:58:07,080
That will not bring a relationship stronger and it probably will make it worse.
872
00:58:07,080 --> 00:58:12,560
And if you're talking about the, the vulnerability I'm talking about where a person's accountable
873
00:58:12,560 --> 00:58:18,280
for their feelings that will deepen the relationship.
874
00:58:18,280 --> 00:58:23,240
But I didn't realize until this moment that there could be a miscommunication about how
875
00:58:23,240 --> 00:58:26,720
we're defining vulnerability.
876
00:58:26,720 --> 00:58:28,600
That's a really good point.
877
00:58:28,600 --> 00:58:29,720
Yeah.
878
00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:34,560
So if that comes up again on my social, that's going to be my ask is like, okay, before we're
879
00:58:34,560 --> 00:58:38,480
going any further, tell me what vulnerability looks like to you.
880
00:58:38,480 --> 00:58:44,000
Yeah, cause I think, I think especially for guys, a lot of times like vulnerability is
881
00:58:44,000 --> 00:58:52,280
equated with, with very negative, soft, weak, you know, pathetic being walked all over,
882
00:58:52,280 --> 00:58:55,320
you know, a step, you know, just being like, what do you call it?
883
00:58:55,320 --> 00:58:59,720
Like a, a map for other people just to step on.
884
00:58:59,720 --> 00:59:00,720
But it's not.
885
00:59:00,720 --> 00:59:02,720
No, not at all.
886
00:59:02,720 --> 00:59:03,720
Yeah.
887
00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:04,720
Yeah.
888
00:59:04,720 --> 00:59:11,440
No, that's, that's something else completely.
889
00:59:11,440 --> 00:59:12,440
Yeah.
890
00:59:12,440 --> 00:59:17,480
You know, and that's the thing with vulnerability is, was we're always going to choose, you
891
00:59:17,480 --> 00:59:19,560
know, we're, it's not like we're not going to have it.
892
00:59:19,560 --> 00:59:23,280
We are going to choose to walk away from it.
893
00:59:23,280 --> 00:59:27,880
So our relationship with vulnerability is going to be one of hardness and a prison that
894
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:31,960
keeps us away from it, or we're going to have a relationship where we accept it and we surrender
895
00:59:31,960 --> 00:59:32,960
to it.
896
00:59:32,960 --> 00:59:34,480
That's a beautiful point.
897
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:38,640
Like you're not choosing whether or not to be in a relationship with vulnerability.
898
00:59:38,640 --> 00:59:40,140
You're in the relationship.
899
00:59:40,140 --> 00:59:42,480
There's nothing you can do about it.
900
00:59:42,480 --> 00:59:43,480
Right.
901
00:59:43,480 --> 00:59:48,680
It's impacting you if you deny it or if you accept it.
902
00:59:48,680 --> 00:59:58,360
Dude, what, when I started my, my whole path coming out of the, the control PTSD had on
903
00:59:58,360 --> 00:59:59,360
me.
904
00:59:59,360 --> 01:00:06,200
I began, in fact, I was in school doing research on veteran reintegration and, and I read an
905
01:00:06,200 --> 01:00:13,280
article by a couple of neurosciences scientists in, um, from Florida who said that soldiers
906
01:00:13,280 --> 01:00:16,920
learn to sh out of shut off their emotions.
907
01:00:16,920 --> 01:00:18,680
And I got so angry.
908
01:00:18,680 --> 01:00:24,480
I'm like, that is the biggest pile of horseshit I have ever heard in my life.
909
01:00:24,480 --> 01:00:31,760
Now I, what I, what I believe happens is we learn they train, they train our, our reptilian
910
01:00:31,760 --> 01:00:33,320
brain.
911
01:00:33,320 --> 01:00:37,200
So that's why like, you know, you hear a loud bang, even somebody's not in combat.
912
01:00:37,200 --> 01:00:44,160
You hear a loud bang, you jump, you know, because that becomes the reaction.
913
01:00:44,160 --> 01:00:49,120
Like I can walk you through like if we, if we're, if we're going and there's contact,
914
01:00:49,120 --> 01:00:52,880
you know, everybody drops to the ground, returns fire, then we all get up online.
915
01:00:52,880 --> 01:00:54,080
Then you start bounding.
916
01:00:54,080 --> 01:00:56,960
When you bound you, you, you see in your head, you say, I'm up, they see me.
917
01:00:56,960 --> 01:00:57,960
I'm down.
918
01:00:57,960 --> 01:01:01,000
So it's about three seconds that you're running and then you hit the ground again, you return
919
01:01:01,000 --> 01:01:05,320
fire while the other team comes up and you keep, and that's, so they call it bounding,
920
01:01:05,320 --> 01:01:07,000
keep moving.
921
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:14,840
So 30 years removed, you know, and I can still walk you through that entire scenario because
922
01:01:14,840 --> 01:01:20,600
it is trained so deep in my brain, almost like on the subconscious level.
923
01:01:20,600 --> 01:01:25,880
And my brain just took a laugh and I had no idea what I was talking about.
924
01:01:25,880 --> 01:01:26,880
Oh man.
925
01:01:26,880 --> 01:01:34,440
Like that program, like the deep program, I mean, I think it's starting to take away
926
01:01:34,440 --> 01:01:38,400
your feelings because you're not feelings are in the cortex, right?
927
01:01:38,400 --> 01:01:42,480
Like, yeah, you are back here in the reptile brain.
928
01:01:42,480 --> 01:01:43,480
Right, right.
929
01:01:43,480 --> 01:01:47,720
But, but to me, it's not about like what pissed me off is like, it's, it's not shutting
930
01:01:47,720 --> 01:01:48,720
off your emotions.
931
01:01:48,720 --> 01:01:53,400
You're still having all of your emotions, but you're still taking care of business.
932
01:01:53,400 --> 01:01:58,560
You're still doing what you got to do, you know.
933
01:01:58,560 --> 01:01:59,960
And so I think it's completely wrong.
934
01:01:59,960 --> 01:02:03,360
And I went on like a spree, like to prove that wrong.
935
01:02:03,360 --> 01:02:06,320
And, but for some reason it's become the prevalent thinking.
936
01:02:06,320 --> 01:02:12,680
I even had, I was at a training that was being done and she was a therapist now when she
937
01:02:12,680 --> 01:02:16,400
was in the military, she was like an assistant to a psychologist.
938
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:19,560
I don't know what her job title would be or MOS or anything, but.
939
01:02:19,560 --> 01:02:25,040
Um, and, and she said, we're trained to shut off our emotions.
940
01:02:25,040 --> 01:02:28,600
So after the training, I went up and I was like, that's not true.
941
01:02:28,600 --> 01:02:32,640
She's like, no, no, it is like, no, it's not true.
942
01:02:32,640 --> 01:02:39,600
I was like, watch any, any war movie, any documentary on war, any, any, anybody from
943
01:02:39,600 --> 01:02:44,200
World War two from Vietnam, from Korea, from, from Iraq, Afghanistan, listen to interviews
944
01:02:44,200 --> 01:02:45,480
with them.
945
01:02:45,480 --> 01:02:46,760
They talk about fear.
946
01:02:46,760 --> 01:02:48,120
They talk about hatred.
947
01:02:48,120 --> 01:02:50,160
They talk about anger.
948
01:02:50,160 --> 01:02:55,680
Like those are emotions in the moment.
949
01:02:55,680 --> 01:02:59,840
You know, there's, there's a movie called Restrepo.
950
01:02:59,840 --> 01:03:02,240
Um, and, and this was my unit.
951
01:03:02,240 --> 01:03:07,440
I've been out, I was out like 20 years, but they were in Afghanistan and they're, they're
952
01:03:07,440 --> 01:03:12,960
studying them now because they, they had some of the worst fighting conditions out of everybody
953
01:03:12,960 --> 01:03:13,960
in the war.
954
01:03:13,960 --> 01:03:20,520
Um, they said like these guys at Restrepo, they, they was almost as if they were like
955
01:03:20,520 --> 01:03:21,520
in Vietnam.
956
01:03:21,520 --> 01:03:23,120
It was like that level of fighting.
957
01:03:23,120 --> 01:03:26,600
Like they were in firefights four or five times a day.
958
01:03:26,600 --> 01:03:33,480
Um, and in the beginning, the guy that wrote the books, the bass and younger wrote this
959
01:03:33,480 --> 01:03:36,840
book called war that then was turned into this movie Restrepo.
960
01:03:36,840 --> 01:03:41,280
They were driving to this, um, they call them fobs or something.
961
01:03:41,280 --> 01:03:48,400
Like, uh, I don't know all the new Norton nomenclature, but, um, and, and they were hit
962
01:03:48,400 --> 01:03:54,720
with an IED and, and the first Humvee, luckily everybody was okay, but the guy driving it
963
01:03:54,720 --> 01:04:00,320
got out of the Humvee and he was walking around and it was an ambush.
964
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:04,120
So now enemy soldiers are up on, up on the, um, in the mountains and they're shooting
965
01:04:04,120 --> 01:04:06,680
down and he's just walking around.
966
01:04:06,680 --> 01:04:07,960
He's not taking cover or nothing.
967
01:04:07,960 --> 01:04:11,240
And he's just screaming like, he is.
968
01:04:11,240 --> 01:04:12,240
So pissed.
969
01:04:12,240 --> 01:04:13,960
He doesn't give a shit.
970
01:04:13,960 --> 01:04:18,680
And then he grabs his weapon, tries to return fire, but his barrel was bent in the explosion.
971
01:04:18,680 --> 01:04:23,960
So he grabs his weapon, it slams it on the ground and then goes, finds another one and
972
01:04:23,960 --> 01:04:26,680
starts returning fire, but he's just getting green.
973
01:04:26,680 --> 01:04:30,360
I'm like, he's in a firefight and he is angry.
974
01:04:30,360 --> 01:04:34,120
You know, there's, there's another thing where there was an ambush and they lost somebody
975
01:04:34,120 --> 01:04:40,120
and a guy in the moment in this firefight is freaking the fuck out.
976
01:04:40,120 --> 01:04:41,120
That's not him.
977
01:04:41,120 --> 01:04:42,120
That's not him.
978
01:04:42,120 --> 01:04:43,120
That's not him.
979
01:04:43,120 --> 01:04:46,520
You know, and, and it's like, these are soldiers.
980
01:04:46,520 --> 01:04:50,080
These are fighters.
981
01:04:50,080 --> 01:04:51,720
And it's pure emotion.
982
01:04:51,720 --> 01:04:55,960
War is pure emotion, but it's controlled emotion.
983
01:04:55,960 --> 01:04:57,560
But it's at the purest form.
984
01:04:57,560 --> 01:04:59,000
Tim O'Brien, right?
985
01:04:59,000 --> 01:05:03,400
Some of the greatest books he was in Vietnam and he wrote this one book, the things they
986
01:05:03,400 --> 01:05:06,800
carried and most of the stories he tells, he'll tell you outright.
987
01:05:06,800 --> 01:05:10,560
The story is not true.
988
01:05:10,560 --> 01:05:12,840
But there's truth in it.
989
01:05:12,840 --> 01:05:16,880
And then he creates this thing and he said, because people don't want to hear a war story.
990
01:05:16,880 --> 01:05:20,280
They want to hear a story with a moral.
991
01:05:20,280 --> 01:05:23,720
And he said, we were just 19 year old kids that we were so scared.
992
01:05:23,720 --> 01:05:28,680
We began to hate the enemy so bad because of that fear that we had.
993
01:05:28,680 --> 01:05:30,040
That's emotion.
994
01:05:30,040 --> 01:05:31,480
We are emotional beings.
995
01:05:31,480 --> 01:05:33,000
There's no escaping that.
996
01:05:33,000 --> 01:05:36,040
This whole thing of men aren't allowed to feel emotions.
997
01:05:36,040 --> 01:05:37,040
It's not possible.
998
01:05:37,040 --> 01:05:38,040
Right.
999
01:05:38,040 --> 01:05:39,040
Yes.
1000
01:05:39,040 --> 01:05:40,040
You are feeling them.
1001
01:05:40,040 --> 01:05:41,040
Yes.
1002
01:05:41,040 --> 01:05:42,800
But it's that same thing.
1003
01:05:42,800 --> 01:05:45,080
You're just choosing to have this relationship with it.
1004
01:05:45,080 --> 01:05:46,080
I'm going to hide it.
1005
01:05:46,080 --> 01:05:47,080
I'm going to keep it locked in.
1006
01:05:47,080 --> 01:05:49,280
I'm not going to show anything stone faced.
1007
01:05:49,280 --> 01:05:54,320
I'm just a machine part that's doing my thing and it's fucking killing us too.
1008
01:05:54,320 --> 01:05:55,320
Yeah.
1009
01:05:55,320 --> 01:05:58,840
And it's creating hatred for things that have nothing to do with it.
1010
01:05:58,840 --> 01:05:59,840
It's women's fault.
1011
01:05:59,840 --> 01:06:00,840
No, it's not.
1012
01:06:00,840 --> 01:06:05,760
When it comes down to it, whether it's from society or whatever the fault is, it's our
1013
01:06:05,760 --> 01:06:11,760
responsibility to say if this is wrong, then I'm going to change myself.
1014
01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:14,000
I'm going to fall in love with my emotions.
1015
01:06:14,000 --> 01:06:15,000
Not going to be afraid of them.
1016
01:06:15,000 --> 01:06:16,400
I'm not going to fight for them.
1017
01:06:16,400 --> 01:06:23,160
How are you going to be this tough, freaking dude like MMA fighter status and be like,
1018
01:06:23,160 --> 01:06:26,280
I can't be vulnerable?
1019
01:06:26,280 --> 01:06:29,840
You can get the shit out of 20 dudes that come at you, but you can't sit there and
1020
01:06:29,840 --> 01:06:33,320
be like, oh, I love you, dude.
1021
01:06:33,320 --> 01:06:34,480
Like really?
1022
01:06:34,480 --> 01:06:41,560
You can live like bench like 800 pounds or squat or deadlift 2000 pounds, but you can't
1023
01:06:41,560 --> 01:06:46,120
cry in front of somebody or you can't sit there and say, man, this sunset is fucking
1024
01:06:46,120 --> 01:06:47,120
beautiful.
1025
01:06:47,120 --> 01:06:48,120
Yeah.
1026
01:06:48,120 --> 01:06:52,320
Get your fake on some, some go, go, go, go.
1027
01:06:52,320 --> 01:06:57,920
I was just going to say, like you mentioned this the other day that when you hold down
1028
01:06:57,920 --> 01:07:04,600
your emotions, you know, you're producing cortisol in your body versus when you feel
1029
01:07:04,600 --> 01:07:06,400
your emotions, right?
1030
01:07:06,400 --> 01:07:11,320
And then you start to produce, you know, whatever it is dopamine, oxytocin as your memories
1031
01:07:11,320 --> 01:07:13,240
and your feelings.
1032
01:07:13,240 --> 01:07:15,920
And so it's like a snowball, right?
1033
01:07:15,920 --> 01:07:20,320
You, because you're holding onto your emotions, but then all the chemicals in your body are
1034
01:07:20,320 --> 01:07:21,560
making you sicker.
1035
01:07:21,560 --> 01:07:26,920
And so then you feel even more angry because you don't feel good.
1036
01:07:26,920 --> 01:07:34,040
Yeah, I just learned this, this thing about cortisol, like cortisol makes it so it's like
1037
01:07:34,040 --> 01:07:35,680
almost impossible to lose weight.
1038
01:07:35,680 --> 01:07:36,680
Yeah.
1039
01:07:36,680 --> 01:07:41,640
No matter what you do.
1040
01:07:41,640 --> 01:07:47,120
And I guess there's even like a body shape for people that have an excess of cortisol
1041
01:07:47,120 --> 01:07:48,240
in their system.
1042
01:07:48,240 --> 01:07:51,920
So their trunks will be big, almost bloated.
1043
01:07:51,920 --> 01:07:52,920
Yeah.
1044
01:07:52,920 --> 01:07:57,160
Their arms and legs will be pencil thin.
1045
01:07:57,160 --> 01:08:02,080
And from what I was reading, they said that is a sign of cortisol just locked in your
1046
01:08:02,080 --> 01:08:03,080
system.
1047
01:08:03,080 --> 01:08:05,840
Yeah, like toxicity, right?
1048
01:08:05,840 --> 01:08:06,840
Yes.
1049
01:08:06,840 --> 01:08:07,840
Yeah.
1050
01:08:07,840 --> 01:08:08,840
It causes inflammation.
1051
01:08:08,840 --> 01:08:15,200
I mean, just seeing what this stuff does, the inflammation, like it gets into our joints
1052
01:08:15,200 --> 01:08:19,400
and like settles there and you start getting arthritis and all these pains.
1053
01:08:19,400 --> 01:08:22,800
And then, you know, then you have people that like, you know, they'll meditate and like kind
1054
01:08:22,800 --> 01:08:24,680
of work a lot of that stuff out of their system.
1055
01:08:24,680 --> 01:08:29,880
And they'll be like, meditation healed me like, I don't know, maybe, but could it also
1056
01:08:29,880 --> 01:08:31,760
be that you're changing your mindset?
1057
01:08:31,760 --> 01:08:34,320
You're changing the chemicals because of your emotions.
1058
01:08:34,320 --> 01:08:36,240
You're changing the chemicals that are being released.
1059
01:08:36,240 --> 01:08:38,680
So there's not as much inflammation in your system.
1060
01:08:38,680 --> 01:08:39,680
Yeah.
1061
01:08:39,680 --> 01:08:40,680
Yeah.
1062
01:08:40,680 --> 01:08:43,200
I 100% think that.
1063
01:08:43,200 --> 01:08:44,200
Yeah.
1064
01:08:44,200 --> 01:08:45,200
Yeah.
1065
01:08:45,200 --> 01:08:47,200
It can go so deep.
1066
01:08:47,200 --> 01:08:49,560
Yeah.
1067
01:08:49,560 --> 01:08:51,320
Yeah.
1068
01:08:51,320 --> 01:08:54,560
And things have to change.
1069
01:08:54,560 --> 01:08:55,560
Yeah.
1070
01:08:55,560 --> 01:09:01,160
And I believe there is a major shift that is going on.
1071
01:09:01,160 --> 01:09:07,520
And I've gotten to the point like people that are that negative just for the sake of being
1072
01:09:07,520 --> 01:09:09,640
that like, I don't get mad at you.
1073
01:09:09,640 --> 01:09:11,840
Like I feel bad for you.
1074
01:09:11,840 --> 01:09:13,840
I was that person.
1075
01:09:13,840 --> 01:09:14,840
Yes.
1076
01:09:14,840 --> 01:09:17,280
And it's a miserable existence.
1077
01:09:17,280 --> 01:09:18,280
Yes.
1078
01:09:18,280 --> 01:09:21,520
And life is so much more beautiful than that.
1079
01:09:21,520 --> 01:09:23,400
Yeah.
1080
01:09:23,400 --> 01:09:28,720
And like you said, if you allow yourself to be triggered and respond, you are not only
1081
01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:34,120
allowing that person to control you, but you're not in alignment with who you really want
1082
01:09:34,120 --> 01:09:35,240
to be.
1083
01:09:35,240 --> 01:09:38,960
You're not the vibration of compassion and acceptance.
1084
01:09:38,960 --> 01:09:44,440
And third, I'd say it's not effective if you're angry with another person, right?
1085
01:09:44,440 --> 01:09:49,600
Like we always talk about that quote that says, you have to touch their heart first.
1086
01:09:49,600 --> 01:09:56,480
So yeah, there's so many reasons to be kind and soft.
1087
01:09:56,480 --> 01:10:02,280
And we finally have some science behind it that I think maybe the world could change
1088
01:10:02,280 --> 01:10:03,280
slowly.
1089
01:10:03,280 --> 01:10:06,920
We could start to realize that there's a different way of being.
1090
01:10:06,920 --> 01:10:07,920
Yeah.
1091
01:10:07,920 --> 01:10:12,240
And softness doesn't mean weakness.
1092
01:10:12,240 --> 01:10:13,240
Yes.
1093
01:10:13,240 --> 01:10:20,720
But you know, I mean, look at these martial arts like capoeira, you know, the dance thing.
1094
01:10:20,720 --> 01:10:27,800
It's this fluid movement that is so beautiful, but also so like, I mean, if I was going to
1095
01:10:27,800 --> 01:10:32,400
get into a fight with somebody that knew capo, like I would have my ass kicked in a second.
1096
01:10:32,400 --> 01:10:38,560
You know, I remember back when I was a kid at like 12 o'clock on Saturdays, Kung Fu
1097
01:10:38,560 --> 01:10:40,200
Theater would come on.
1098
01:10:40,200 --> 01:10:44,120
And they would have like these old Jackie Chan's like the drunken punchmaster, you
1099
01:10:44,120 --> 01:10:46,120
know, so you're like falling all over the place.
1100
01:10:46,120 --> 01:10:50,320
But you know, so you need to be fluid.
1101
01:10:50,320 --> 01:10:53,840
You need to have some softness.
1102
01:10:53,840 --> 01:11:02,920
You know, if you're just that stiff and that hard constantly, it's not good.
1103
01:11:02,920 --> 01:11:03,920
Yeah.
1104
01:11:03,920 --> 01:11:04,920
Yeah.
1105
01:11:04,920 --> 01:11:05,920
Yeah.
1106
01:11:05,920 --> 01:11:08,400
I think this was a good episode.
1107
01:11:08,400 --> 01:11:09,400
I liked it.
1108
01:11:09,400 --> 01:11:11,280
It feels good.
1109
01:11:11,280 --> 01:11:12,280
Yeah.
1110
01:11:12,280 --> 01:11:13,280
Yeah.
1111
01:11:13,280 --> 01:11:14,280
Thanks.
1112
01:11:14,280 --> 01:11:15,920
I like it a lot.
1113
01:11:15,920 --> 01:11:17,680
Thank you everybody for joining us.
1114
01:11:17,680 --> 01:11:38,360
I like it.