Mindset for Execution - “Promise a lot. Deliver More.” with Mike Wilcox, Chairman & CEO of Wilcox Financial & Wilcox Sports Management

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Hey, this is doctor Amber Selking, host of the Building
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Championship Mindsets podcast. If you're looking to elevate your team's
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performance and truly win the mental game, I'm available for
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speaking engagements and I would love to join you at
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your next corporate event or sports organization meeting. Let's work
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together to unleash the power of mindset and your people. Also,
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if you're interested in sponsoring this podcast, which reaches listeners
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across the globe, we'd love to partner with you. Visit
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Selkingperformance dot com backslash podcast for more details.
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This is coach Lou Holtz and you're listening to Building
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Championship Mindsets the podcast with doctor Amber selfgate from the
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locker room to the board room. Doctor Amber is the
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best in the business at helping you and your team
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build the mindset that drive results.
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So lock in.
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If you could take just one thing away from today
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and implement it in your life, I know you'll be
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a better person, a better leader, coach, athlete, pair or
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spile because of it.
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Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Building Championship Mindsets the podcast.
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This is your host, doctor Amber Selkin. Where we are
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in season five entitled mindset for execution. We have been
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on such an incredible journey so far this season, hearing
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from leaders and influencers from so many different spectrums. And
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then what I'm most excited about having the opportunity two
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episodes ago to dive in with doctor Terry Linnhart, one
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of our performance coaches here at the Selking Performance Group,
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to discuss the exciting virtual performance coaching program that we
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are launching here selecting participants on April twenty ninth, but
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really diving in the month of May, and then going
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over a five month journey of performance coaching which is
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going to include group coaching sessions, one on one coaching sessions,
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and then a live event here in South Bend, Indiana
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during football season. And yes price does include a game
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ticket to a Notre Dame game. And just excited to
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be able to bring together elite performers professionals from across
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the country who all have a similar desire to take
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their game to another level, right, to start to think differently,
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to get a jump start, to reset their mindset, to
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take who they are and what they do to a
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new level. Right And because here at the Selking Performance Group,
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we're really all about helping individuals, teams, and organizations understand
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and leverage the power of mindset and leadership to unleash
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performance excellence. And that's from the locker room to the boardroom, right,
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so from the sports space to the business space. But
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the reality of it is that extends to the classroom,
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to the living room, to the community centers that we're touching,
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and so wherever you are, whatever phase of your journey
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you're in, if you want a group of accountability partners,
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a group of other professionals that are going to help
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hold you accountable, that are going to encourage you, and
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performance coaches that are going to come alongside of you
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to just expand your ways of thinking and understanding about yourself,
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about this world, and about your role in this world,
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then shoot me a message Amber at Selkinperformance dot com
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and just let me know that you're interested, and I'll
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send you more information to see if this could be
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the right fit for you and the right cohort. So
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we'll be having more of these in the future. And
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part of my and my team's heart and intent with
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this is really get the right mix of people as well,
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not just a hodgepodge of random people, but really people
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that we believe are the right fit for where you
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are in your journeys and in your development. So again,
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reach out Amber at selk and Performance Group and Amber
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at Selkingperformance dot com and let me know if you're
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interested in that. I don't want to spend too much
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more time talking because what I really want to dive
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into is today's guest, which is Mike Wilcox, who will
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be with us in just a moment. But Mike is
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the chairman and CEO of Wilcox Financial and Wilcox Sport Manage,
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which is really a diversified financial services and planning firm,
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and they're committed to establishing and maintaining long term relationships
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with their clients. They just have an incredible heart and
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mission and sense of purpose and are just amazing people.
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I've had the extreme fortune of knowing Mike for almost
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ten years now and our relationship has continued to grow
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and to evolve as friends, as colleagues, and you know,
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standing on the sidelines and they're Dame football games together.
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You couldn't ask for a better human being that has
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done such incredible work in his life. I mean, wait
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till I read you his bio. It's staggering, really, and
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I'm not going to get into too much of it
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because I want him to tell you more about his journey.
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But Mike is this amazing man who has this incredible
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life story. But listen, he's done so many things. I mean,
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he's knowledgeable and trustworthy, but he's personable and passionate. And
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you get that. I mean, you just get that sense
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when you have this interaction with Mike, whether you're a
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billionaire or you know, some high school graduate. I mean, shoot,
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when I first met him, I was a college graduate
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and I shook his hand and you know, said great
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to meet you, sir, and love to ask you questions.
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And he was so hospitable, gave me his business card
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and was so excited to be a part of it.
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But he founded Wilcox's Financial in nineteen eighty two, and
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he's directly served his clients in thirty nine states in
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twelve countries as a registered investment advisor. But more than that,
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he really cares about his people and the goals that
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they're and he's got a team of individuals that work
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for him in financial planning and from an industry standpoint,
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you know, for more than three and a half decades.
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Mike has been a member of the Top of the Table,
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which consists of the top one tenth of one percent
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of the world's financial service professionals, and he's served on
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the board of that organization. Evenly, he's he's an authority
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in the areas of financial a state and compensation planning.
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And he's also a renowned author and speaker and has
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spoken to groups in over twenty five countries and thirty
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five states. So you know, at the end of the day,
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Mike is one of my mentors. Every time I get
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a chance to be around him, I'm learning, I'm taking notes.
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I'm understanding more about the industries that I serve and
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the people that I serve, and shoot as I continue
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to grow my own speaking business and expand the opportunities
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to pour into people about these concepts of mindset and
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mindset development as it relates to execution. He's a guy
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I look to to see how to do that even better.
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He's served on different boards including Bowling Greens University where
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he graduated, lou Holdsupper, Ohio Valley Hall of Fame, which
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is where we first intersected. And he's just a philanthropist
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at heart. He's committed to community service. He serves as
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the Festabal Board of on the Festabal Board of Directors,
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the Culver Academy's Board of Directors, which is a private
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school here in Indiana where actually Notre Dame football goes
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down and does our fall camp. Just an amazing guy.
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I mean, at Bowling Green State University, he's a He's
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served on the FULC Club, which is their boosters board,
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and he's on several board of trustees. So I mean,
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I could go on and on. Just go to Wilcoxfinancial
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dot com. It's just breathtaking what he's done and what
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he's served and what he's given over these years. But
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what I'm most excited about today is that we're really
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going to dive into Mike, what has been your mindset
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for execution? Hey, Mike, what has been all the people
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that you've served over the years. What have you seen
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about them that has intrigued you that makes you know, Yes,
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this person is a champion, right, knows how to show
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up and deliver their best when it matters most. All Right,
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ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, I am humbled, honored,
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and pleasure to introduce you to Mike Wilcox. Mike, thank
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you so much for being with us today.
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Thanks Amber, it's a pleasure to join it.
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So Mike and I have met many, many years ago,
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and I just want to tell this quick story because Mike,
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I don't I don't know if you remember this, but
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the first time I met you was actually at Coach
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Holtz's Hall of Fame event and Coach Kelly had just
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gotten the job at Notre Dame. I had just graduated
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from Notre Dame and you guys are there sitting at
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the head table, and I just thought to myself, well,
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there's no better time than now to introduce myself to
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coach Kelly and to what appeared to be his agent
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at the Tie agent, and you know, and so I
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walked up and I introduced myself to you guys, and
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you gave me your business card and just could not
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have been nicer and more open to be be a connection,
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be a resource, be a friend. And so first of all,
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I wanted to one see if you remember that moment,
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and to say thank you, because it was just impressive
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the type of person that you were in that moment.
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Before I had the opportunity to really get to know you.
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I wasn't sure you're going, So I just hope you
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keep the story clean. Remember that, and having coach there
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and at the Lou Holtz, Ohio Valley Hall of Fame,
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and you know, like like coach Kelly, Coach Holtz has
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touched so many people and continues to do with their
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both of them do with their philanthropic planning and especially
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for that people in that part of the world and
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the teachers and and that we support over there.
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So that was I do remember that night.
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And it's kind of fun, as they say, to get
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the band back together.
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Yeah, it was. It's awesome every time that that group
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gets together. It's a group of incredible individuals who just
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have a heart to give back, So you know, and
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that's that's what I love and respect most about you, Right,
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You surround yourself with amazing people, and you treat good
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people well regardless of where they're at in the world.
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And so, Mike, why don't you just back us up
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a little bit, give us a little bit about your
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journey to where you are today, and then maybe just
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share with our listeners more about your your role and
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your organization.
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Sure, well, I've had interesting journey.
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You know, you know, I was reminded of the quote
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you know the road to success as I was under construction,
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and I think that would probably epitomize my journey. Grew
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up in the East, the oldest of five parents' divorce,
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lost everything in a divorce.
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Father left us.
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Bankrupt and hit the but had a very strong mother
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who who bullion values. She went to work teaching again
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with five heads. And you know, ultimately, you know, you know,
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you know, when you're sleeping on the floor, it's hard
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to fall out of bed, right and uh we we
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got an opportunity to to uh to go on and
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and and my main sports football, hockey, lacrosse.
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But I was able to to spend a year to great,
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great prep school down in New Jersey, the Petty School,
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which changed my life, with leaders and mentors that continue
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to change my life.
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And then I thought I'd be going back to Africa
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New York where I grew up Cornwell Country, and the
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last minute it didn't work out, and.
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The door opened at that closed.
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They had the door opened to Bowling Green and came
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to Bowling Green on a hockey lacrosse scholarship, played two
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years of hockey, four years of lacrosse, and we had
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great teams and great coaching and just a wonderful This
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is a student athlete. I was fortunateenough to become a
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three time All American at Bowling Green and student trustee
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and president of the Entretornity Council, a lot of leadership positions.
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I had a wonderful experience.
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Went on from there to I met my wife jan there,
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you know, and she thought about me for five or
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six years and finally said yes, and we'll be celebrating
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our forty first here this spring, which is which is
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a great story.
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And stayed involved with Bowling Green.
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Went on to become chairman of the board of trustees
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and on the board for ten years. And so I've
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had a lot to pay back to my alma mater
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and what they did for giving me the opportunity that
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they did. So it's I did turn down about twenty
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one corporate offers right out of college corporate marketing, finance,
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and go into business with a trustee and was within
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two or three years. And that was many many moons
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ago before you were born. And back that time, you
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know that there was no well management or financial planning.
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And I had a crazy idea that what if we
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could kind of put the pieces together and offer people
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consulting to create you know, financial blueprints, you know, for
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themselves and their families. And we had a great company
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here in Toledo buy that concept. No one's corning, and
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we got going on it. And so we were you know,
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we were early in the in the in the management
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concept of wealth management and development of it, and you know,
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to a certain extent, right place, right time, and operation
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meeting opportunity. It just catapulted us into an incredible business,
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Wilcox Financial, that we started in eighty two. And then
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around about two thousand, you know, I was on the
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board at Bowling Green and went a football search and
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Coach Holtz I call it Coach Holts, and he highly
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recommended some guy I'd never heard of it, but I
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have a Urban Meyer. And we hired Urban and got
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to know Urban and helped him go to Utah and
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then on to Florida, and you know, we kind of
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looked at this and we said, maybe maybe we can
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use some of our knowledge and training and experience and
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results and really really kind of you know, you know,
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put that into the athletic place.
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And today eight.
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About four hundred and fifteen football coaches, basketball coaches, athletic directors,
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conference commissioners, university presidents and broadcasters. And our Wilcox Sports
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management side, and then on our core business, Wilcox Financial,
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we have about forty five hundred to find net worth individuals,
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family business and fortune five hundred companies. So diversified practice
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with diversified people, and just have a wonderful client tele
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And you know, just like you you you learn more
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from your clients that you ever learned from anyone else,
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really the experiences you go through with them. And so
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it's we're very proud of what we've done, but we
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work very hard at it.
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You know.
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I think we're changing lives one by one with our
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council and our planning and and you know, at the
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same time, I will say, you can't help people who
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don't listen. And so the people we do listen, I think,
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and do a lot of good for and the people
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don't listen, maybe they'll come around, and there's some that
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never will.
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So you can't boil the ocean.
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You know, And so we're focused on the people that
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listen and want to get ahead and do great things
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for them.
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That's awesome. Wow, there's so much in that, so I
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want to I want to break apart that entire story
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a little bit. And again in season five, we're really
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talking about mindset for execution, right, how do we build
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mindsets or patterned ways of thinking that help us show
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up to execute and deliver our best when it matters most.
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And so throughout that really abbreviated story of what is
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your amazing life, there's so many pieces in there that
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I just want to pull out, and I want to
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ask you, like, what do you feel was the mindset
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that made you successful for that piece of your journey?
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And the first is adversity, right, all the adversity that
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you faced as a as a child, What was the
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mindset or the patterned way of thinking that you that
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you feel like helped you navigate that? Well?
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Well, I ambra, I always that's a very good question.
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And you know, you no one can I can throve
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before they survive. And so, you know, going through a
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pretty traumatic hood and not having a father around, I
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was really blessed by coaches and teachers and faculty members
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and other dads, and you know that was part of
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that adversty has helped me personally, I want to be
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the best business and I can be best advisor I can.
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You know, I want to be these wanted to be
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the best dad and the best best husband that I
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because because I I didn't have some of that. And
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when you go through adversity, you can feel sorry for
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yourself and you can you know, you can cry and
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moan about it, or you can do something about it.
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So I think I think Adversey for me was always
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a huge motivator.
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And even going back to when high school lacrosse or
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junior high school across told me that I'd never make
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it in the sport and uh, And as I came
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off the field at the at the college All Star game,
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the longest lacrosse came in history of modern day lacrosse
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seven overtimes in my hometown at Cornell, and he was
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the first guys that congratulate me and say how wrong
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he was about about what he thought.
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I could achieve.
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So, so you know, adversity creatings and there's no one
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more than me, no one more luckier than May.
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And at the same time, you know it's.
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It's a grant and you you always have to be prepared.
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You've got to lead by example. You can't lead from behind.
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We see too much of that in this country today.
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And and so I think, I think the tough times
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for me and getting thrown and becoming a better person,
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and you know, if it doesn't kill you, it makes
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you stronger. Yeah.
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Absolutely. So then I was going to ask you about
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your sporting career, but I think you answered that within
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there is you know, perseverance, relentless pursuit of what it
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is that you're after, regardless of what people talk about,
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you know and say about you. It was in season
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two we the season was entitled Mindset Monday, and we
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talked about different mindsets and way champions think about things,
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and one of them was criticism from the critics, right,
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and and champions lean into that, you know, they say, okay,
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well watch this. You know that's their mindset around that.
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You know, you you and I so adversity as a childhood,
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then sport. What about what about relationships? Forty already one
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years with amazing jan who is literally ladies and gentlemen,
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one of the most beautiful spirits I've ever met. I
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love every time I get to be in her presence.
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What makes great relationships? And not only with your wife,
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but all of your clients, like, what's your mindset around
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the relationships and that relationship management side.
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Well, I think I think there's a couple of things.
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You know, along's the promise. I've always believed you've got
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to promise a lot and got to deliver more.
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You've got to exceed expectations.
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Because in our business, whether we're dealing with a coach
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or whether we're dealing with the CEO, or whether we're
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dealing with a billionaire, you know, it's expectations. And we
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talk about expectations of performance and service and relationship, and
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I think building those relationships critical today. I think it's
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I think the world is changing, so you never hear
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that enough anymore about the importance of relationships. And you know,
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a lot of the clients that we take care of,
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you know, some some good clients become good friends. Some
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good friends become good clients. But what I've always told
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myself to a highandard, that I'm going to deal with
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a client or a friend that becomes a client, then
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I just have to deliver a better mousetrap, a better service,
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a better consulting, a better product, a better plan. I
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just have to just just it just has to be
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extingly better than anyone else will will create deliver and
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that makes work ethic.
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Yeah, man, I just want to pause on that for
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a minute. I love what you said, promise a lot,
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deliver more. I feel like in today's society like we
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shy away from that. It's like over prom or under promise,
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over deliver. It's like, no, you're saying, now I'm going
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to promise a lot and then I'm going to even
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do more than that. I mean, that gets me jacked
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up just here.
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And you say it, well, well, it is because today
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we we you know, really in the financial services, but
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people over promise, they under and then you overcharge for
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their under delivery.
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Now that it's not sustainable, okay.
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And and that's why two of every three clients, uh,
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you know, come to us.
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For a fix, okay.
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And and we find that people are delivering or they're
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not telling people they're under delivering, they don't disclose fees
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appropriately okay, and then the client buys out about it
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and then they come into our stable at that point.
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But we're very honest about all that. We don't there's
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nothing negative, you know, I've never seen a statue of
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a critic, okay, and there's a there's a lot of
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critics out there, you know, and so we're not critical,
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but we're when we when we do the deep dive
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analysis for people and say, you know, you asked us
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for a second opinion.
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Here it is. And by the way, these are the analytics.
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This is you know, we're kind of like financial physicians,
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you know that make the diagnosis. Then does the patient
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want to undergo the procedure, have the surgery, take.
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The metas.
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And just like anything, there's no easy fixes. You know,
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things get, things go sideways over time. They don't turn
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around overnight. And I think, you know, you're back to
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the relationship again and people have confidence in you and
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believe in you.
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And and the.
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Other thing is that just can't overstress in any business,
405
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whether it's you as a consultant or whether it's been rating.
406
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There's an ortheedic surgeon, right. I mean, people talk to people, okay.
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There's lots of different ways to communicate today, and people
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check you out in advance. I was on a call
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with a fine client, Sin Sinnati yesterday and he's got
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a big time lawyer.
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I had checked.
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Him and he had checked me out and he was
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somentary of He said, I check you out through a number,
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and you really check out good. I look forward to
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working with you and so that bonds, you know, just
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by doing good work and reputation, and people know that.
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They know if you're a calm, they know if you're shortcutting,
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they know if you're not treating them right. So it's
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it's it's really important we take care of people, and
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we take care of business.
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We families.
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We're just going to take them to the Wilcox Corral.
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You know, we're gonna always take care of him for
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a lifetime. You're you're stuck with us.
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I love it. The other the other couple things I
426
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heard in your story is opportunity, right, being able to
427
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see opportunity and then seize opportunity. What's your mindset around
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that component, because that sounds like it's been I mean,
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that's been a critical part in your story and you
430
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being where you're at today. So how do you think
431
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about that?
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There's so much afternity out there, and you know, but
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I think I think people see different things through different filters,
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you know, and that people are fringing through negativity or
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a nonpatitude or or not looking for.
436
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The best in people.
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You know, it's incredible to me just adding in the
438
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last ninety days or relationships that these relationships started or
439
00:24:54.279 --> 00:24:58.960
or communication arted to be in a relationship on these
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four between four and six years ago. And and you
441
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know they we we continued talking over.
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Time, and and.
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You know it, for whatever reason, it wasn't right for
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the for the these four people to sweach or over
445
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to uh over time and ancients anding with it and
446
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sticking with they they thought through it. And these are
447
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four newships that are with wonderful people, wonderful businesses. One
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of them is a coach, a very well coach. But
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you know, I think patients.
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No I'm not. That's not one of my stronger suits.
451
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But I think the I think the in an athletic
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you know jargon is to fight through the block, fight
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through difficulty and get to the other side and be
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able to to convince people that could be looking at
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things differently or getting a second opinion, and and be
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because you only got one shot to do it in life,
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you know, for your family, for your players, or for
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your employees.
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If you're a CEO, you got to get it right.
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And the clock's ticking. So I just think, you know,
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I've always been unfiltered, and I've always looked for the
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for the for the positive way, and uh to get
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to the other side of the relationship, sustainable and productive.
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I love it. Something else that struck me and you
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sharing about your journey and your work and and how
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you capitalize on that opportunity was through innovation, right, doing
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things differently, being courageous enough to change the game. How
468
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how have you thought about that over the course of
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your career and and and your work.
470
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Well, we you know, we've we've had and I always
471
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say when I came to Toledo, I had four problems.
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I never before. I didn't know anybody, I didn't know,
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I didn't have any money. Other than that, it was easy,
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00:27:03.240 --> 00:27:07.240
and you know, and I probably in the for year
475
00:27:08.039 --> 00:27:11.119
for two years, you know, you know, it was on
476
00:27:11.200 --> 00:27:15.640
the land, down on the mat there times got up
477
00:27:16.279 --> 00:27:21.160
one hundred times. And I think that that the the
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ability to get through those stuff time and stick to it,
479
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and then and then the the having the courage to
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try and to innovate, to reinvent. I guess is the
481
00:27:33.920 --> 00:27:37.960
word that I've used a lot to reinvent new markets,
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to reinvent and and the planning as opposed to product,
483
00:27:44.759 --> 00:27:48.599
to reinvent and form the sports company. Who would have
484
00:27:48.599 --> 00:27:51.839
thought that eighteen years later we'd be representing over four
485
00:27:51.920 --> 00:27:56.319
hundred people just in our sports division and we're adding
486
00:27:57.359 --> 00:28:00.960
to a week just because of referrals. And that's the
487
00:28:01.000 --> 00:28:03.640
big thing in any personal service business. You know, if
488
00:28:04.160 --> 00:28:07.440
if if you do, if you do great work, if
489
00:28:07.440 --> 00:28:12.039
you do great work like we, someone might tell a friend.
490
00:28:12.640 --> 00:28:16.839
If you do really bad work, they might tell ten.
491
00:28:19.640 --> 00:28:25.680
And so our business is one and so, and we
492
00:28:25.759 --> 00:28:30.000
expect referrals that that's not a big surprise to us.
493
00:28:30.200 --> 00:28:33.240
We expect we don't have to ask for them, but
494
00:28:33.319 --> 00:28:38.759
we expect that people going to communicate. We prove our
495
00:28:38.799 --> 00:28:42.799
mettle and what we can do. And I think the
496
00:28:43.319 --> 00:28:48.079
delivery is that around. We talked earlier, but we didn't.
497
00:28:48.119 --> 00:28:53.000
I didn't an accummation, you know, I mean, never in
498
00:28:53.039 --> 00:28:55.759
the history of the world have there been more in
499
00:28:55.839 --> 00:29:00.519
different ways to communicate, okay, never, okay, whether it's phone,
500
00:29:00.599 --> 00:29:04.440
whether it's like you're doing now, whether it's text, whether
501
00:29:04.480 --> 00:29:09.640
it's facts, whether it's email, whether it's whatever. And it's
502
00:29:09.720 --> 00:29:15.000
really cursor to to our practices here. If you communicate
503
00:29:15.599 --> 00:29:18.839
or if you can't learn to communicate better every day,
504
00:29:20.400 --> 00:29:22.599
you know, you're not gonna you're not going to be here.
505
00:29:22.640 --> 00:29:24.440
You're not gonna you know, we don't have a JV
506
00:29:24.559 --> 00:29:27.759
team here. Okay, we did anversity team period, so there's
507
00:29:27.759 --> 00:29:32.960
no grunts, and we develop our people over time wonderful
508
00:29:33.119 --> 00:29:35.079
deliveries of counsel that people need.
509
00:29:35.359 --> 00:29:37.000
And so I think.
510
00:29:37.359 --> 00:29:41.160
Really the communication, the follow up, the you know, and
511
00:29:41.559 --> 00:29:44.960
you know, communication revolves around caring. You know, people don't
512
00:29:45.000 --> 00:29:46.599
care how much you know until they know how much
513
00:29:46.599 --> 00:29:51.359
you care. You can't fake caring. You either care about
514
00:29:51.359 --> 00:29:54.279
people and you're going to deliver or you don't, okay,
515
00:29:54.680 --> 00:29:58.559
And and I think so I just think that communication
516
00:29:58.920 --> 00:30:05.519
is really a a huge here at our enterprises, and really,
517
00:30:06.119 --> 00:30:09.720
you know, scare people and we want people after they
518
00:30:10.440 --> 00:30:13.279
engage with us to come back and say and they
519
00:30:13.640 --> 00:30:16.359
people said all the time, God, I wish I knew
520
00:30:16.359 --> 00:30:19.519
about you ten years ago, and I said, well, we
521
00:30:19.519 --> 00:30:20.880
weren't that years ago.
522
00:30:20.880 --> 00:30:21.680
We're smarter now.
523
00:30:22.359 --> 00:30:26.799
And I just think and when people are happy and
524
00:30:26.839 --> 00:30:29.680
they're getting service and they're getting better results and they're
525
00:30:29.680 --> 00:30:33.640
getting we've heard their fees, not increase their fees, then
526
00:30:33.680 --> 00:30:37.680
they are going to help you. And you know that
527
00:30:37.680 --> 00:30:42.640
that's the referral is really referrals are our compensation. We
528
00:30:42.680 --> 00:30:46.440
can't spend them, but we leverage that and bring in
529
00:30:46.519 --> 00:30:50.599
new people and take care of more people and that
530
00:30:51.279 --> 00:30:52.640
helps us complete our food chain.
531
00:30:52.839 --> 00:30:56.279
Really, I love that. It really what you said there
532
00:30:56.319 --> 00:31:00.400
about communication involves around carrying. Can't fake carry Now, one
533
00:31:00.440 --> 00:31:03.640
of our core values at Lipper Components, where I have
534
00:31:03.720 --> 00:31:06.440
the fortune of sermons the director of people Performance is
535
00:31:06.480 --> 00:31:09.359
caring about people, and so in our trainings last week,
536
00:31:09.400 --> 00:31:11.920
I shared a video from John Harbaugh and he's talking
537
00:31:11.960 --> 00:31:14.640
about servant leadership and he said, and here's the thing
538
00:31:14.640 --> 00:31:18.319
about caring about people. You like, actually have to care.
539
00:31:19.680 --> 00:31:23.480
And it's so simple but so true because you can't fake.
540
00:31:23.319 --> 00:31:26.519
That, you know. You know that they'll saying that, you know,
541
00:31:26.559 --> 00:31:28.000
and I was an epitome of it. You know, you
542
00:31:28.599 --> 00:31:31.400
got to fake it to make it, you know, and
543
00:31:31.880 --> 00:31:34.079
maybe a fake it to you make it initially. But
544
00:31:34.920 --> 00:31:38.119
you're right, you can't. You can't fake caring. People are
545
00:31:38.119 --> 00:31:41.319
too smart and they're going to weed that out and y'll,
546
00:31:42.079 --> 00:31:45.640
you know, and it's just you know, I mean if
547
00:31:45.720 --> 00:31:48.680
if someone's going to try to fake caring, that's not
548
00:31:48.759 --> 00:31:50.759
the person you want to be associated with anyhow.
549
00:31:50.920 --> 00:31:53.119
So yeah, absolutely, and to your point, fake it to
550
00:31:53.279 --> 00:31:54.960
make it. It's really faked to you become it, right,
551
00:31:55.000 --> 00:31:56.920
Because what do we talk about all the time on
552
00:31:56.960 --> 00:31:59.599
this show, right, ladies and gentlemen. Our thoughts affect our emotions,
553
00:31:59.599 --> 00:32:03.400
which or physiological responses, and that's what drives our performance.
554
00:32:03.519 --> 00:32:07.319
And repeated thoughts build mindsets. And so if you're repeatedly
555
00:32:07.359 --> 00:32:09.640
thinking I care about this person, I care about this person,
556
00:32:09.680 --> 00:32:12.240
even if you're faking it, your brains fire in those
557
00:32:12.240 --> 00:32:16.519
neurological signals, right, and you're building that mindset, and so
558
00:32:17.079 --> 00:32:20.119
I love it. It's fake it till you become it. Mike,
559
00:32:20.200 --> 00:32:22.880
Before we move into the mindset training that we always
560
00:32:22.960 --> 00:32:25.400
leave our listeners with, I'm curious. You know, you've had
561
00:32:25.400 --> 00:32:30.079
the fortune of working with high level performers across so
562
00:32:30.200 --> 00:32:33.519
many different domains. What have you noticed. What are some
563
00:32:33.680 --> 00:32:36.960
trends and patterns and themes that you've noticed in those
564
00:32:37.000 --> 00:32:41.640
individuals that have led to their sustainable success and that
565
00:32:41.839 --> 00:32:47.160
high level of execution in the midst of pressure or
566
00:32:47.200 --> 00:32:51.000
stress or you know, high intensity scenarios.
567
00:32:51.839 --> 00:32:56.160
Well, I think there's just such similar traits and people
568
00:32:56.240 --> 00:33:00.319
like this. The one I would submit to you is
569
00:33:00.319 --> 00:33:02.799
that those people and those are the people that I
570
00:33:02.920 --> 00:33:05.759
want as clients because those are the people I can
571
00:33:05.839 --> 00:33:09.119
do the best job because not much we're going to
572
00:33:09.119 --> 00:33:12.920
disagree on right And and I think the biggest attribute
573
00:33:12.920 --> 00:33:14.960
that I think when we think about those people of.
574
00:33:15.519 --> 00:33:19.240
People are winners, not winers. They're truly winners.
575
00:33:19.759 --> 00:33:25.480
And and you know, I mean, you know, if if
576
00:33:25.519 --> 00:33:29.160
the if the obstacle is in the road, they're going
577
00:33:29.200 --> 00:33:30.839
to go through it. They're going to go over it,
578
00:33:30.839 --> 00:33:33.599
they're going to go around it, but they're not putting
579
00:33:33.599 --> 00:33:34.200
it in reverse.
580
00:33:34.359 --> 00:33:34.559
You know.
581
00:33:34.920 --> 00:33:39.000
Uh So I think, you know, those people are winners.
582
00:33:39.160 --> 00:33:43.559
They had to discipline their workers. And the other thing
583
00:33:44.039 --> 00:33:46.279
with those people Amber and I preached this a lot,
584
00:33:46.400 --> 00:33:49.240
is that you know, they don't have rearview mirrors on
585
00:33:49.319 --> 00:33:53.640
the cars or in their life. Okay, they've knocked the
586
00:33:53.680 --> 00:33:59.039
rearview mirrors off of their infrastructure and their practice and
587
00:33:59.079 --> 00:34:03.000
their personal life, and they just look ahead and they
588
00:34:03.720 --> 00:34:08.199
something unforeseen happens, they deal with it, you know, and
589
00:34:09.920 --> 00:34:12.280
look at coach Kelly, I'm his heart saying that we
590
00:34:12.400 --> 00:34:14.960
pattent it for him years ago. Next man in, right,
591
00:34:16.079 --> 00:34:19.440
and you know, I mean one goes down, you know,
592
00:34:19.559 --> 00:34:21.639
you get the next man in, the next woman in.
593
00:34:22.039 --> 00:34:25.239
And you've got to be prepared. And again that's another
594
00:34:25.320 --> 00:34:26.679
trade is preparation.
595
00:34:27.159 --> 00:34:28.519
And uh, you.
596
00:34:28.480 --> 00:34:33.559
Know, even my my daughter who try liar field AMG Sports,
597
00:34:33.559 --> 00:34:35.920
and you know, she knows she's meeting a lot of
598
00:34:35.960 --> 00:34:39.000
people that I take care of him. No, and you know,
599
00:34:39.239 --> 00:34:44.119
and you know I'll say, boy, your dad he's he's
600
00:34:44.159 --> 00:34:45.360
always prepared.
601
00:34:45.239 --> 00:34:50.880
And well last my dad he was born. And that's
602
00:34:50.920 --> 00:34:51.719
the rationale.
603
00:34:51.760 --> 00:34:55.280
But you know, I talked to the people. Are people
604
00:34:55.320 --> 00:34:57.920
here a lot about the game before the game? You know,
605
00:34:58.000 --> 00:35:00.320
what's your game before the game before or you have
606
00:35:00.360 --> 00:35:03.519
an appointment, before, you have a before you had dinner
607
00:35:03.519 --> 00:35:07.039
with a clown before what is what are you thinking about?
608
00:35:07.079 --> 00:35:10.559
Are you prepared? Are you doing that prep work in
609
00:35:10.599 --> 00:35:15.119
the game before the game. And that's just that constant,
610
00:35:15.400 --> 00:35:18.519
you know, the constant lessons that I've learned from athletics.
611
00:35:18.679 --> 00:35:21.239
And that's the reason why we hire a lot of
612
00:35:21.280 --> 00:35:24.880
ex athletes there. Okay, because they've they've gotten knocked down,
613
00:35:24.880 --> 00:35:28.519
they've gotten back up, they're winners. But they've also you know,
614
00:35:29.039 --> 00:35:32.920
you know, I remember a lot more about the crushing
615
00:35:32.960 --> 00:35:36.320
defeat sometimes than the championships that I want.
616
00:35:36.559 --> 00:35:37.400
So you've got to.
617
00:35:37.400 --> 00:35:41.000
Learn from both. But you've got to move on and
618
00:35:41.639 --> 00:35:43.440
you can't let the little thing.
619
00:35:43.400 --> 00:35:44.039
Get to you.
620
00:35:44.199 --> 00:35:47.800
Too many people in the minors and they just they
621
00:35:47.920 --> 00:35:51.880
let little things all the time, and it just I
622
00:35:51.920 --> 00:35:57.000
think the winners in life just they continue to cruise through,
623
00:35:57.280 --> 00:35:59.800
get through the blocks, get to the other side, and
624
00:36:00.119 --> 00:36:02.840
get in the and zone, and get an and zone.
625
00:36:02.880 --> 00:36:03.440
Everybody went.
626
00:36:03.960 --> 00:36:06.880
You know, you win, your client, when their families win,
627
00:36:06.960 --> 00:36:12.599
their employees win, everybody wins. That's the type of delivery
628
00:36:12.599 --> 00:36:13.599
that we want to provide.
629
00:36:13.840 --> 00:36:14.440
Dark Lines.
630
00:36:15.400 --> 00:36:18.920
Oh, I was taking copious notes, Mike. I hope y'all
631
00:36:18.960 --> 00:36:21.480
were as well, because I just wrote down those bullets.
632
00:36:21.519 --> 00:36:24.840
I'll put them in the episode notes for everybody. But
633
00:36:24.920 --> 00:36:27.039
I love that and something that I'm going to take
634
00:36:27.039 --> 00:36:30.119
into my own personal reflection this evening and really just
635
00:36:30.159 --> 00:36:32.239
think through where am I on all of those things.
636
00:36:32.280 --> 00:36:36.119
Winners not whiners, having discipline, being a worker, preparation, no
637
00:36:36.199 --> 00:36:38.880
rearview mirrors, deal with it and move forward. What's the
638
00:36:38.880 --> 00:36:42.079
game before the game, prepare for that and execute learning
639
00:36:42.119 --> 00:36:45.639
from failure, get in the end zone regardless, and don't
640
00:36:45.639 --> 00:36:48.519
play in the miners, like, don't spend time, energy and
641
00:36:48.559 --> 00:36:51.639
attention in the miners. Life's too short. The game is
642
00:36:51.719 --> 00:36:55.119
actually too big, and so many people get caught in
643
00:36:55.159 --> 00:36:59.679
that minor league system literally and figuratively because of that.
644
00:37:00.119 --> 00:37:02.840
So that that that's that list is going to stick
645
00:37:02.880 --> 00:37:04.320
with me. So thank you for sharing that.
646
00:37:04.400 --> 00:37:04.599
Mike.
647
00:37:06.280 --> 00:37:11.079
Well, I'll give you one more difference between u plagiary
648
00:37:11.800 --> 00:37:12.480
and research.
649
00:37:13.039 --> 00:37:17.559
What's that Plagiarism is stealing an idea from a person,
650
00:37:18.400 --> 00:37:24.280
and that's that's illegal or at least unethical. But research
651
00:37:24.960 --> 00:37:27.440
is stealing a lot of ideas from a lot of
652
00:37:27.480 --> 00:37:30.480
different people bring them into your own.
653
00:37:31.159 --> 00:37:33.400
So that is true.
654
00:37:34.519 --> 00:37:37.639
I would encourage you know, there's not a lot of
655
00:37:37.679 --> 00:37:42.159
original ideas in life. And you know, I'm just been
656
00:37:42.159 --> 00:37:45.679
blessed to be around so many winners as opposed to
657
00:37:45.760 --> 00:37:50.320
whiners and clients that have taught me more over the
658
00:37:50.400 --> 00:37:56.320
years by working with them, and so I just would
659
00:37:56.679 --> 00:38:01.159
encourage people to continue that research and meet people and
660
00:38:01.199 --> 00:38:05.400
pick brains and listen to people's approach and you know,
661
00:38:05.480 --> 00:38:08.400
there's no one size fits all and then blend that
662
00:38:08.480 --> 00:38:12.079
in through your own research into who you are and
663
00:38:12.400 --> 00:38:15.039
how effective you want to be and what kind of
664
00:38:15.199 --> 00:38:17.800
leader you want to be and how you can help
665
00:38:17.840 --> 00:38:21.440
people and enhance people's lives. Because it's been a real
666
00:38:21.519 --> 00:38:23.239
value added in my life.
667
00:38:24.360 --> 00:38:28.000
I love that. So what's your championship mindset training? For everybody?
668
00:38:28.000 --> 00:38:30.400
So it's listening, what's something that they can be doing
669
00:38:31.119 --> 00:38:33.599
throughout the course of this week to really build their
670
00:38:33.639 --> 00:38:34.719
mindset for execution.
671
00:38:36.000 --> 00:38:37.039
I think you've got to.
672
00:38:38.039 --> 00:38:44.519
I think I have to anyhow constantly reaffirm with myself
673
00:38:45.440 --> 00:38:50.679
my mission and what is my mission? And my mission
674
00:38:50.920 --> 00:38:56.960
is to help our clients and soon to be clients
675
00:38:57.199 --> 00:39:00.400
and maybe strangers at our clients, but to help help
676
00:39:00.480 --> 00:39:04.559
themselves and to ultimately have financial freedom, take care of
677
00:39:04.559 --> 00:39:09.199
their families, do the right things, because you know, life
678
00:39:09.280 --> 00:39:12.880
is not a cupcake for everybody, and you know people
679
00:39:13.000 --> 00:39:14.760
do have all bad days.
680
00:39:14.920 --> 00:39:17.119
You know you don't believe that, then just.
681
00:39:18.920 --> 00:39:20.639
See if you can read a newspaper that doesn't have
682
00:39:20.679 --> 00:39:25.119
an obituary column, right, So, we try to bear people
683
00:39:25.199 --> 00:39:28.159
for a life and I just I just think that
684
00:39:28.480 --> 00:39:31.639
the stories of the people we've helped in the thank
685
00:39:31.679 --> 00:39:33.800
you notes I have when you're in the office sometime
686
00:39:33.880 --> 00:39:37.320
I'll share with you one whole file drawer of thank
687
00:39:37.360 --> 00:39:41.639
you notes from clients and clients, kids and business associates
688
00:39:41.679 --> 00:39:45.519
thanking us for what we've done that their business wouldn't
689
00:39:45.519 --> 00:39:49.840
have continued or they could have corrupted her. And so
690
00:39:50.559 --> 00:39:53.039
what we really do is important for people. So and
691
00:39:53.280 --> 00:39:56.880
I just try to remember every day how important that is.
692
00:39:56.920 --> 00:39:59.280
And I have to do the right thing, and I
693
00:39:59.320 --> 00:40:03.559
have to have my mind trained in a positive attitude.
694
00:40:03.639 --> 00:40:05.360
So when I come in I hit the deck, I've
695
00:40:05.360 --> 00:40:08.639
got forty fifty people here that are gonna, you know.
696
00:40:08.679 --> 00:40:10.039
The fish rods from the head right.
697
00:40:10.360 --> 00:40:13.639
And you know, if I come I've got to allows
698
00:40:13.679 --> 00:40:19.039
the attitude or just had something bad happened, then you know,
699
00:40:19.400 --> 00:40:21.400
it's you know, you got to shake.
700
00:40:21.159 --> 00:40:21.960
It off and move on.
701
00:40:22.119 --> 00:40:25.079
You know, you you fumble the ball, you you turn
702
00:40:25.119 --> 00:40:28.480
the ball, you gotta know you got to move on,
703
00:40:28.639 --> 00:40:29.280
get it back.
704
00:40:29.079 --> 00:40:30.440
And let's do something positive.
705
00:40:30.559 --> 00:40:34.800
So so I just think that constant positive mental attitude
706
00:40:34.840 --> 00:40:38.360
that empowers me and powers me to be positive around
707
00:40:38.360 --> 00:40:42.039
other people and and do good things, not on your
708
00:40:42.039 --> 00:40:44.519
own business or your own sphere, but in the community,
709
00:40:44.679 --> 00:40:47.920
you know, and and be to have that said about
710
00:40:47.960 --> 00:40:52.199
you know, coach, are about terrific guy and have that
711
00:40:52.280 --> 00:40:55.480
servant leadership and know that you know there's there's so
712
00:40:55.599 --> 00:40:57.920
much you can do for other people, and.
713
00:40:59.719 --> 00:41:02.280
So just something I think about every day.
714
00:41:03.119 --> 00:41:06.400
Mike, that is awesome. Wow, what a powerful episode. Thank
715
00:41:06.400 --> 00:41:08.320
you so much for being here with us today. I
716
00:41:08.360 --> 00:41:11.199
really appreciate you taking the time and as always being
717
00:41:11.280 --> 00:41:14.920
your amazingly generous self and just sharing your time and
718
00:41:14.920 --> 00:41:17.440
your wisdom and your insights with myself and all of
719
00:41:17.480 --> 00:41:19.960
our listeners from around the world. So thank you for
720
00:41:20.000 --> 00:41:21.880
being with us today.
721
00:41:22.079 --> 00:41:25.119
Thank you for having me Amber, and keep doing keep
722
00:41:25.199 --> 00:41:28.559
up and keep dealing with what you're doing, because you're changing.
723
00:41:30.000 --> 00:41:32.800
It makes a difference, so.
724
00:41:32.159 --> 00:41:32.679
Keep it up.
725
00:41:32.840 --> 00:41:35.159
Thank you sir. Well, ladies and gentlemen. This has been
726
00:41:35.159 --> 00:41:37.960
building Championship Mindsets the podcast. This has been your host,
727
00:41:37.960 --> 00:41:41.199
doctor Amber Selking, with our incredible guest Mike Wilcox of
728
00:41:41.239 --> 00:41:44.760
Wilcox Financial. Please check us out on all the social
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media platforms. We are accessible on Instagram at Selking Performance,
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on Facebook at Selking Performance Group, and on Twitter at
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champ Mindsets. We would love to hear your feedback as well,
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so you can jump over to iTunes and rate and
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review us. It's really helpful for the financial sponsors that
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we have to just show them the impact that this
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is having around the world and touching lives. I mean,
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I'd love to hear the stories that you are sharing
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with me on the takeaways and how you're applying them,
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so please feel free to continue sharing those. You can
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email me directly Amber at Slkingperformance dot com. And if
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there's anything that we can do our performance coaches to
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come alongside of you or anybody in your team in
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an organization, we would love to do that or keynotes
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that can can serve your team and help again shift
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that mindset to really understand how you show up every day,
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like Mike mentioned, determines not only the day that you're
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going to have, but the day that those around you
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are going to have. And again that's in our control
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because how we think is our responsibility. So thank you
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again for being with us. It's been a pleasure being
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with you, and as always, from the locker room to
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the boardroom, I just want to challenge you to continue
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building your championship mindset, not