🎙️ Quality Time Remaining: Live Intentionally Before It's Too Late with Steve Baker

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Welcome, everybody, to the Bring On Success radio program.
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I am Jim Klauck. For those of you who don't know, I started Bring On Success
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decades ago because I wanted to learn from great people doing great things.
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So I surrounded myself with these great people, and I get to interview them,
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and learn more about them as you learn about them, too.
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So I find by bringing these people into my world, I can help people who listen and watch my podcast.
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I'd like to welcome my good friend, Steve Baker, to the program.
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I love you, Steve. Thank you so much for coming on to the show. Well, thank you, Jim.
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It's a pleasure to be here. It really is. Yeah, well, we only have so much time because...
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Time is leaving us. And the reason why I bring that up, everybody,
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is I want to talk about Steve's book called Quality Time Remaining.
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And it could be kind of a somber topic, but it shouldn't be.
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But we're all going to die.
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Yes. I love your graphics, the way things just rise.
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Yep. And so we're all going to die, unfortunately.
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Unfortunately, um, a friend of mine, Dave Ramsey, you may have heard of him.
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He's got a radio show as well.
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And Dave Ramsey always says, none of us get out of this alive.
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So we're all going to pass on to a different world. It won't be this one though.
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We're going to turn to dust.
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So let's enjoy the time we have. Sorry about the doom and gloom,
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everybody. But in case you didn't know, you're going to die.
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Sorry. It's a fact. And most of you who are watching this are probably mature
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adults, and you probably come to terms with that.
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However, however, are you getting the most out of your time left?
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Have you prepared for when you may not be feeling well or pass away and you
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leave behind possibly a mess for your family? It could be your spouse or children.
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Are you taking care of yourself, your diet, your sleep, your exercise,
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living the best life you can? And I'm very, very intentional.
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I'm a different kind of cat.
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I spend so much time on me and people are like, what are you, conceited?
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Are you a narcissist? What's it about? I'm like, if I can't be the best,
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and if I don't like and love myself as well, then how can I help others?
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It's like what the flight attendant says before takeoff.
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In case of emergency, the oxygen mask will drop.
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Do not put it on yourself first. Oh, no, no, no. Sorry. Put it on yourself first
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so you can help others. That's how it goes, right? Yeah. So.
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We need to take care of ourselves so we can help others. But beyond that, we don't want to be sick.
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We don't want to be lethargic in the last two decades of our lives.
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But even more so, for me, I want to be present today.
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And before I let you get into your spiel, Steve, I'll say something.
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A lot of people don't live in the present.
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They live in the future.
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When I retire, I will do this. when I amass a million dollars,
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I'll do that. When I get promoted, when I get married, when I have children,
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when I pay this off, when, when, when.
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But no one goes outside and goes for a walk with the dog and looks at the birds
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and the trees and says, I'm happy to be here today.
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Because you do know you could just drop dead at any point in time.
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And people, I don't think, Really appreciate the present And I wanted to You
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know Bring that to light Because for me That's very important I live every day,
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For today Do I expect to die Today or tomorrow?
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No But in case I do At least I know I got the best out of today So Why did you write the book?
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Well, first of all, I, I think what we should do is go back to Dave Ramsey again,
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because he has a great concept that has helped me out a lot in my life.
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I remember the one time I can't remember where I saw him speaking,
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but he said something to the effect of, Hey, does Christmas come every year?
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And everybody's like, yeah, yeah. Well, why is it that we're all paying for
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it a year or two after, you know, why don't we think before it comes at the same time every year?
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Got very emphatic about that. And I started to go, holy moly,
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that is right about so many things.
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You know, this is going to happen. You know, that's going to happen.
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You know, kids are going to need braces, blah, blah, blah, blah.
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Now I didn't, I didn't like wake up at 20 years old knowing this stuff.
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Right. I, I would say I was probably well into my middle age before I really got that kind of wisdom.
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But the reality is, uh, we live in a society of instant gratification.
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Um and your version of living for today is different than most most are like
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i'm just going to do it now and then i'll worry about tomorrow tomorrow
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you know and when you say living in the future while you and i might be thinking
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hey let's make plans let's have contingency plans and trap doors and and right
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we're going to make sure that we're covered because we want to take care of
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ourselves and our families,
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the reality is most people don't know they can't see past the hood of their car and so.
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What I really wanted to do was really shift my own thinking when I dealt with
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a health situation a number of years ago. In 2018, I found out I had stage three
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prostate cancer and it scared the heck out of me.
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But, you know, we had to get through it. And the medical field is really good
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at medicine. They are really not great at people-y stuff.
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Meaning, you know, Mr. Baker, you have cancer and, uh, here's what we're going to do.
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The prospects are not good or what, you know, I mean, it's just like,
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ah, you lost me at you have cancer, especially prostate cancer,
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which is in a very interesting part of the body.
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You know, you're like all messed up. Joanne, my wife told me that,
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uh, Steve, you know, you checked out like really early in the conversation.
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Did you hear what he said? Thank goodness she was there.
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And I recommend you always have an advocate with you because I didn't hear a lot of what he said.
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And so what I'm trying to say is if you think about that kind of slap in the
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face or punch in the gut or whatever you want to look at it like I was looking
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at it like, well, what happens next?
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How long will I live? And by the way, that was 2018. To this day,
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I do not have one doctor, surgeon or oncologist that will say this is when you're going to die.
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I wanted to know. So over Christmas that year, we were talking to the kids about
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it and surgery was coming right up in just really a week or so.
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And I started asking my future son-in-law at the time, Will.
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I said, when am I going to die? Turns out Will is an actuary.
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And so for those of you who are listening that don't know exactly what that
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is, will the actuary advises the largest pension funds on the planet about when
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their pool is going to die, right? They need that information so they can plan.
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Well, the funny thing is at first, he thought I was kidding.
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It didn't take long for him to understand that I was really wanting to know.
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And as we looked at actuarial tables, I'm like, people should have access to this stuff.
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People should know that there is, it may not be 100% accurate,
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but it really got me moving on this quality time remaining idea because i was
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going to make the most of whatever i had left i have no intention of dying tomorrow you just said that,
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i want to live a full robust life and really enjoy it on my terms in order to
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do that we need to know like the way i look at it is if you knew how much time
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was on the clock would you play the game differently,
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because you've seen this before right Two-minute warning.
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The two-minute warning. Yes. Two minutes left. Oh, my gosh. I don't want to
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be that guy that wakes up at 70 and says, you have six months to live,
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and then try to cram it all in. You can't cram for a life. You can't cram for a harvest.
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What I want you to do is I want everybody out there to be thinking about,
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what if you just took a little more control over your life?
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Because that will make you happier than any drug. That will make you happier...
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It will make you control over your life is the number one predictor of human
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happiness. And believe me, I've studied all in the research for this book.
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I've studied all the happiness material.
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The research studies everything. And I am shocked at how much people look at
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that stuff and go, if I just had this, it would make it all better.
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And I'm telling you, folks, it is. It's a bunch of little things.
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And that is why I wrote the book and how I wrote it because it doesn't have
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to be this massive we're in peace tome that's a million pages long.
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I wanted to give people a very practical blueprint of framework,
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if you will, to be able to make small improvements in your life that add up to be big improvements.
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It has pictures in it. It's easy for me to read, right? Hey,
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I love it. Yeah, you found the pictures.
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Lots of pictures, lots of great quotes. So that's what I wanted to do is give
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people an opportunity to have fun while they're dealing with what I consider
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to be a pretty non-conversational topic.
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Meaning people will talk about
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just about anything. They don't talk about when they're going to die.
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They don't talk about what it's going to be like to age in America because I'm not afraid of dying.
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I'm more afraid of living for a really long time terribly sick.
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Absolutely. And so there is lifespan and then there is healthspan.
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You hear a lot about healthspan. So lifespan is something we've all heard of.
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Healthspan is something I think that has only recently come into our vocabulary.
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Some people may not have even heard of it.
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And so just because you may live to 90 doesn't mean you want to be in your bed
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from 75 to 90 because you're overweight, you have diabetes, you have other diseases.
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And today's medicine, which is great. You said doctors are great.
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Surgeons are great. Medicine is great.
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It can keep you alive, but.
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There are people who are alive on a ventilator who aren't even conscious.
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My point is, is we can keep people alive, but are you really living?
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And I want to be able to live, Steve, the best quality life I can until the
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day I drop dead. And I do a lot of studying too.
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I spend minimum 90 minutes to two hours a day educating myself,
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podcasts, reading books, listening to books, articles, blogs, whatever. And...
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For me, the way we live today just doesn't make sense.
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I've learned from my studies that years ago,
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when people died, if they didn't die of a disease or fell off a cliff,
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okay, if they died of old age, let's say they lived to 90 or 100,
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people actually lived to 100.
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If they got through the wars, the battles, the diseases, and the attacks, they died fast.
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People die slow in our country they do they do and it's it's quite sad you and
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i've both seen it i know your dad lived in 99 uh my dad uh passed away uh just on the edge of 91,
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my great aunt uh passed away at 108.
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Joanne's dad died just a few weeks short of being 100 The thing is,
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I can tell you and you, I don't have to tell you, but you and I can tell the
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audience about what end of life looks like to many people.
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And it's usually not great because we can keep people alive for a long time.
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And I'll tell you this, in the research that I did, and that took a couple of
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years, really, one of my favorite books that I read was, And there was a lot of favorites.
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And I it's full attribution in my book, any kind of a quote or a concept.
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I fully attribute it to the author of whatever book it came from.
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And Atul Gawande is his name. He wrote a book called Being Mortal.
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He's also famous for the Checklist Manifesto. But in Being Mortal, he's an actual doctor.
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And he talks about the things that doctors don't do for themselves and their
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families that they do for patients all the time.
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A lot of it is end-of-life stuff.
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And I'm going, wait a minute, if doctors don't even think this is humane,
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why would they do it? You know what I mean?
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Because they think like you do, quality of life. And so what I want to do,
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with quality time remaining is not only make people aware of their mortality,
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but also then walk them through a way to say, oh, we're not going to live forever,
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but we can live pretty well a
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lot longer than you think we can if we make minor changes here and there.
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Some are financial some are relational some are uh health related of course,
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but the it's the combination of all of them that make a great life because we
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have these different facets of life whether it's your mindset or your spiritual
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nature or your uh connection to uh
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to your family and friends i mean all of these things are contributors to a good life,
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but we have to be strong enough and courageous enough to just say,
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hey, we should look at this.
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It's an unpleasant topic until you get into it. And then it becomes hopeful.
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And I see the light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak, because there's so
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much to be happy about. And we live in a great time if we choose to look at it that way.
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Yeah. You know, it's interesting. You say we live at a good time. We live in a great time.
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There's been no better time, in my opinion, despite what people say about how
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crazy the world is today.
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No better time to be a human being on Earth.
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We live in arguably the best nation on the planet.
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It's not arguably, Jim. I mean, I got to be honest. If you really look at the
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data, we are living in the longest period of peace in human history.
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Yes. I know it doesn't seem like it, but the news and social media do not promote good news.
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Yeah. I mean, we don't have to worry about the Romans invading.
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We don't have to worry about the civil war that we had.
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There is a civil war going on, but it's being fought differently, right?
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So, no, it's a good – and we don't have the disease and so forth.
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But not only that, not only have we conquered the diseases through education.
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And technology and medicine.
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So, now we don't have to worry about the polios and the measles and the plagues, okay?
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Yeah, the COVID thing, honestly, not good for some people.
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Nothing compared to some of the things that wiped out millions of people years
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ago. At least we have a fighting chance now. We do, right?
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But beyond that, though, beyond the fact that I don't have to worry about getting
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the plague, I can go about my life and through education, knowledge and technology and medicine.
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I can apply all the stuff we know now that we didn't know a thousand years ago,
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500 years ago, 50 years ago.
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Correct. Podcasts, books, conferences.
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We can educate ourselves on maybe we shouldn't drink the six pack of Coke a
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day. Maybe we should drink two liters of water.
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Maybe not out of a plastic bottle. Some people say that's bad.
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Maybe something a little cleaner.
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Maybe we should do what our ancestors did.
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We don't have to think about all these crazy ideas like, let's go to the gym
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and get on the stair climber.
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There was no stair climber until 50, 60 years ago.
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Right. When you think about how we used to live, if you believe in hunter-gatherers,
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which there still are on this planet, we went to sleep when the sun went down.
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We got up when the sun came up because we didn't have lights.
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Duh. and then we foraged and we hunted and we survived and we reproduced.
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That's really all we could do for a very long time.
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Now we live in this world of abundance and we're like, you know what?
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I'm going to eat the box of donuts on the way to the gym. And in the gym,
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I'll just burn that off. It'll be fine.
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There were no donuts before and there were no gyms. People walked five,
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10 miles a day to forage. They didn't have jobs. They didn't commute.
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They didn't sit in traffic. They didn't sit in cubicles. They didn't have the high-stress jobs.
00:17:14.447 --> 00:17:20.194
Their cortisol went up when an animal chased them or some group came into their village to pillage.
00:17:21.860 --> 00:17:25.343
Our stress is on a lot of the time now.
00:17:25.627 --> 00:17:29.339
And so we're not even living the way we lived or we're designed to live.
00:17:29.339 --> 00:17:32.929
That's a whole other story, if you will. I'm getting into biology and so forth. But...
00:17:34.425 --> 00:17:38.506
If I think, Steve, if we could,
00:17:39.313 --> 00:17:46.907
all of us could just think about how we were designed to live and try to live
00:17:46.907 --> 00:17:50.482
that way with living in today's world.
00:17:50.691 --> 00:17:52.961
It's hard. I get it. But I do that.
00:17:53.791 --> 00:17:58.427
I decided to move out. You do. I do. And Jim, that's one thing that your listeners
00:17:58.427 --> 00:18:03.392
need to understand, too, is you're a very intentional person and you really design your life.
00:18:03.683 --> 00:18:06.577
And quality time remaining is really more for people like me,
00:18:06.577 --> 00:18:11.496
who are just regular folks that were doing their best, or so they thought,
00:18:11.763 --> 00:18:15.727
and they just needed that direction and that,
00:18:16.427 --> 00:18:20.067
again, I'll use the word blueprint, if you will, because, look,
00:18:20.067 --> 00:18:24.887
I'm not knocking gyms or donuts or anything like that, but you brought up some
00:18:24.887 --> 00:18:29.897
good points, which are, we tend to overthink and over-engineer everything.
00:18:30.071 --> 00:18:34.547
And so not only do we have the best medicine on the planet and the best opportunities
00:18:34.547 --> 00:18:38.217
on the planet and all of these great things, we also have the right to go out
00:18:38.217 --> 00:18:39.827
and eat the doughnuts and to
00:18:40.167 --> 00:18:45.117
smoke a pack of cigarettes or do these different behaviors that then tear down
00:18:45.117 --> 00:18:48.589
all the great opportunity we have. And all I'm trying to do is say...
00:18:49.831 --> 00:18:51.169
Just look at your life and say,
00:18:51.169 --> 00:18:55.235
you should have fun and you should enjoy things and experience things.
00:18:55.514 --> 00:19:00.079
But are you working towards something that will give you the peace of mind,
00:19:00.079 --> 00:19:06.068
the relationships, the health and the vitality for you to really, truly enjoy it?
00:19:07.304 --> 00:19:11.495
That's not that hard to do. And the funny thing is, because,
00:19:11.693 --> 00:19:14.909
you know, my wife and I started out with nothing. We worked our way through
00:19:14.909 --> 00:19:17.846
school and really struggled for many years.
00:19:18.159 --> 00:19:21.619
You know, finance would be the first thing that I would point to because I was
00:19:21.959 --> 00:19:24.347
blessed with pretty good health most of my life.
00:19:24.793 --> 00:19:28.509
And, um, a lot of people have it the other way. Maybe they have the resources,
00:19:28.509 --> 00:19:30.755
but they don't get to help or some other combination.
00:19:31.219 --> 00:19:36.269
Anyone can pick up this book and go for the one that they, the part of life
00:19:36.269 --> 00:19:38.568
that they're struggling with most and start there.
00:19:39.103 --> 00:19:44.399
But the key is you got to admit you can't keep doing this forever without thinking
00:19:44.399 --> 00:19:48.425
about the holistic person, the entire human that you are.
00:19:48.803 --> 00:19:52.069
And what I love is when my favorite thing in the world, I was asked to come
00:19:52.069 --> 00:19:56.657
down to Mexico and do this as a couples retreat recently.
00:19:57.023 --> 00:19:59.588
And what I love is people doing it together.
00:20:00.006 --> 00:20:04.615
It uncovers things that will never be uncovered in normal conversations.
00:20:04.958 --> 00:20:08.549
And I think that is so great because when people actually, you know,
00:20:08.549 --> 00:20:11.249
some of them will actually be crying and talking to each other.
00:20:11.249 --> 00:20:14.715
And then they come to me and say, Steve, you really helped us get here.
00:20:14.972 --> 00:20:18.429
And I'm like, I didn't do anything. All I did was give you the blueprint,
00:20:18.429 --> 00:20:21.891
the framework to uncover these things that you really want.
00:20:22.263 --> 00:20:27.039
And in fact, the most healthy thing is when people go, but I thought this and
00:20:27.039 --> 00:20:29.586
you thought that, how are we together?
00:20:29.801 --> 00:20:33.598
And when you, when you get them together, you would be amazed. It's like rocket fuel.
00:20:33.841 --> 00:20:37.469
It just sends people on a whole different trajectory and they get there faster.
00:20:38.379 --> 00:20:42.822
Again, money, relationships, spirituality, all of these things.
00:20:44.094 --> 00:20:48.959
They become more in focus. Your priorities become more clear.
00:20:49.162 --> 00:20:55.013
And when you focus on your priorities, guess what? You kind of, you get what you want.
00:20:55.913 --> 00:20:57.966
Hey, I got to tell you another story that happened recently,
00:20:57.966 --> 00:20:59.071
Jim. You haven't heard this one.
00:20:59.558 --> 00:21:03.996
There's a guy named Joe Jackson, not Michael Jackson's father,
00:21:03.996 --> 00:21:07.923
but Joe Jackson put out a song, I think in the 90s or something called,
00:21:08.202 --> 00:21:10.636
You Can't Get What You Want Till You Know What You Want.
00:21:11.296 --> 00:21:14.966
And he just repeats that through the whole thing. And, and I heard it in a store
00:21:14.966 --> 00:21:17.206
and I'm like, that sounds like my stuff.
00:21:17.577 --> 00:21:22.638
Wait a minute. He's saying, he's saying exactly what people have said throughout human history.
00:21:22.893 --> 00:21:26.436
So now you start to think about it. You go, uh, here's Joe Jackson saying,
00:21:26.436 --> 00:21:29.286
you can't get what you want till you know what you want. And most people don't
00:21:29.286 --> 00:21:32.698
know who they are, what they want, or when they're going to go get it.
00:21:33.249 --> 00:21:37.816
So they're kind of going through life, non-navigating. You've got Joe Jackson
00:21:37.816 --> 00:21:42.526
in the nineties. You've got Mark Twain in the 1850s saying, I could teach anyone
00:21:42.735 --> 00:21:46.416
how to get what they want out of life. I just can't find anyone who knows what they want.
00:21:46.976 --> 00:21:51.336
Go back further to Seneca or Marcus Aurelius. This has been going around as
00:21:51.336 --> 00:21:52.957
long as humans have been around.
00:21:53.538 --> 00:21:59.122
People don't know what they want. Quality time remaining is a very good way,
00:22:00.051 --> 00:22:03.714
to figure out who you are, what you want, and how to get it in the time you have left.
00:22:05.605 --> 00:22:12.351
I like the way you stated that. Very concise. By the way, the book is available
00:22:12.351 --> 00:22:15.851
in the description of this podcast, so there will be a link there.
00:22:16.246 --> 00:22:20.894
And I'm sure it's okay, Steve, to put your contact information in.
00:22:21.887 --> 00:22:24.701
Absolutely. And of course, you can get it on all the formats.
00:22:24.701 --> 00:22:28.006
It's available on Amazon and Apple Books and everything like that.
00:22:29.608 --> 00:22:33.001
But the key is you got to do something with it, right?
00:22:33.001 --> 00:22:37.251
And that's what I want people to do is know that it is, while it is a couple
00:22:37.251 --> 00:22:44.788
of hundred pages long, it's really mostly about sharing wisdom of the ages aligned with tools.
00:22:45.026 --> 00:22:47.986
There are 14 simple tools that you can use.
00:22:48.991 --> 00:22:52.921
And again, what I'm trying to do is give you the resources you need to make
00:22:52.921 --> 00:22:55.631
this thing, not just, oh, I got to do this.
00:22:55.631 --> 00:23:00.130
It's really should be kind of fun interesting a spirit of discovery about yourself
00:23:00.490 --> 00:23:04.421
but also when you come out of it with a plan and you know what you're doing
00:23:04.421 --> 00:23:08.118
can i just tell you from personal experience having a plan,
00:23:09.494 --> 00:23:14.611
ah the peace of mind the freedom that it gives you you separate yourself from
00:23:14.611 --> 00:23:20.471
the average person in the united states according to harvard's study only three
00:23:20.471 --> 00:23:23.999
percent of the population has personal written goals.
00:23:24.615 --> 00:23:29.967
I cannot implore you enough, ladies and gentlemen, to look at yourself and say,
00:23:30.449 --> 00:23:35.861
am I going to be part of that 3% or part of the 3% that are at the top of life
00:23:35.861 --> 00:23:38.192
satisfaction? It's that simple.
00:23:40.445 --> 00:23:45.280
Most people don't know what a goal is. They don't know what to put down as a
00:23:45.280 --> 00:23:48.160
goal. Like you said, they don't really know what they want.
00:23:48.717 --> 00:23:55.509
And honestly, most people, and I'm not picking on anybody. I'm just talking in general.
00:23:55.741 --> 00:24:00.675
Most people, even if they had goals, won't achieve most of them because they're not disciplined.
00:24:01.012 --> 00:24:04.164
I believe most people are pulled through life.
00:24:04.785 --> 00:24:08.320
They are reactive, not proactive. active.
00:24:08.692 --> 00:24:13.191
So I've said this before, they wake up, they don't feel that well.
00:24:13.777 --> 00:24:17.230
They haven't been taking care of themselves. They're not sleeping well.
00:24:17.230 --> 00:24:21.055
They watch Netflix all night and they get three hours sleep.
00:24:21.327 --> 00:24:24.514
They're eating poorly. They know they are eating poorly. They're not exercising.
00:24:24.747 --> 00:24:27.490
They have a stressful job. They should get a divorce, but they won't.
00:24:27.490 --> 00:24:28.700
So they're stressed at home.
00:24:29.025 --> 00:24:33.256
They go to the doctor and the doctor says that you have cancer or some illness.
00:24:33.698 --> 00:24:38.307
And now they're like i guess maybe i better work on this so everything else seems to stop,
00:24:39.363 --> 00:24:42.881
so they get a divorce because they decide well this is killing me right,
00:24:43.717 --> 00:24:47.410
they quit their job and get a new one because they need to fix this can't so
00:24:47.700 --> 00:24:51.580
they're my point is is people won't do anything until they feel they're gonna
00:24:51.580 --> 00:24:56.964
die literally like think about think about what people will go through before there is.
00:24:58.590 --> 00:25:03.230
Hopefully they'll say hey let me take a look at this before something happens.
00:25:03.843 --> 00:25:07.850
And Dave Ramsey talks about the fact that most people he's worked with,
00:25:07.850 --> 00:25:09.753
and he does a lot of studying on the financial piece.
00:25:11.587 --> 00:25:15.269
People will not do anything until they hit rock bottom financially.
00:25:15.269 --> 00:25:16.920
And it's true of almost anything in life.
00:25:17.789 --> 00:25:22.389
It is everything. That's the basis of Alcoholics Anonymous. Yeah. Dave Ramsey.
00:25:22.609 --> 00:25:27.091
I mean, just think about it. Until we have to do something, we're probably going to wait.
00:25:27.654 --> 00:25:31.069
I'm not saying, look, everybody that's listening here, it's called the Bring
00:25:31.069 --> 00:25:36.297
on Success podcast, not Bring on the Mediocrity podcast. That's a different show.
00:25:36.756 --> 00:25:40.930
But so they're already here, I think, is already on the path.
00:25:41.470 --> 00:25:44.726
And what we have to do is we are not, Jim and I are not saying,
00:25:45.051 --> 00:25:49.169
oh, a lot of people are bad or humans are just basically, no,
00:25:49.169 --> 00:25:51.379
that's not the point is that it's ignorance.
00:25:51.379 --> 00:25:55.749
It's just like me and as a young man, no one ever taught me about money.
00:25:55.749 --> 00:25:59.289
So how did I learn about my, I had to go learn about it and that sort of thing.
00:25:59.289 --> 00:26:03.379
What I want to do is give people, what I've done for financial literacy over
00:26:03.379 --> 00:26:08.849
the last 21 years, uh, out with the great game of business and helping small
00:26:08.849 --> 00:26:10.674
to midsize businesses and all that sort of thing.
00:26:11.104 --> 00:26:15.759
That's what I did for work. What I want to do with this and what I am doing
00:26:15.759 --> 00:26:21.227
with this is give people what I'd call life and longevity literacy.
00:26:21.819 --> 00:26:25.836
Because if they understand that they can have everything they want out of life,
00:26:26.126 --> 00:26:29.505
once they figure out what they want and make that a priority,
00:26:29.882 --> 00:26:34.950
the thing is, it is just, look, here's a way to look at it. When you have a plan.
00:26:36.483 --> 00:26:40.860
It takes away so much of the scary of life, even if you've got debt,
00:26:40.860 --> 00:26:46.150
even if you're not fully healthy, even if you've got a relationship on the rocks or whatever.
00:26:46.150 --> 00:26:48.581
The thing is, you've got to have a plan, know where you're going,
00:26:49.422 --> 00:26:55.810
or you'll never get there, right? And so last year, I found out that my cancer
00:26:55.810 --> 00:27:01.085
had metastasized and gone stage four. So this is, what, six years after the fact.
00:27:02.356 --> 00:27:08.585
The crazy thing is, ladies and gentlemen, is that it wasn't the end of the world for us.
00:27:08.950 --> 00:27:12.010
I mean, honestly, when I hear stage four, metastatic, chronic,
00:27:12.010 --> 00:27:15.172
you know, words like this scares the poop out of me.
00:27:15.555 --> 00:27:19.067
Well, the thing is, at the time, I'm like going, OK, what are we going to do?
00:27:19.276 --> 00:27:22.655
It was more action oriented. It was let's get this thing done.
00:27:22.812 --> 00:27:26.420
Even Joanne was better. And normally Joanne's a professional worrier,
00:27:26.420 --> 00:27:27.937
right? She's going to be, oh, my God.
00:27:28.210 --> 00:27:30.630
No, because we already had a plan.
00:27:30.930 --> 00:27:35.500
And that plan included the kids know what's going on and we know what we want
00:27:35.500 --> 00:27:39.507
to do every year with the kids and our financials are set up and we have,
00:27:40.190 --> 00:27:44.600
a plan for when one of us or both of us die and we have a will and all the documents,
00:27:44.600 --> 00:27:48.800
all the stuff that people like Susie Orman or Kiyosaki or,
00:27:49.590 --> 00:27:51.080
Dave Ramsey or Mr.
00:27:51.080 --> 00:27:55.232
Money Mustache, all of the great gurus, whether you love them or hate them,
00:27:55.610 --> 00:27:57.148
they are doing the same thing.
00:27:57.496 --> 00:28:01.659
Do these things. You don't have to worry about it now. Let's take the scary,
00:28:02.140 --> 00:28:04.306
out of life. And then life is quite good.
00:28:06.599 --> 00:28:11.240
Yeah. Honestly, I don't mean to be difficult for the people who are listening
00:28:11.240 --> 00:28:15.578
and watching this, but a lot of people aren't equipped or they don't think they are. Because.
00:28:16.530 --> 00:28:17.714
Yeah. I mean.
00:28:19.479 --> 00:28:20.018
So.
00:28:22.352 --> 00:28:27.890
There are a lot of components to living a successful life and to do the right thing.
00:28:29.411 --> 00:28:35.930
Marriage is difficult getting a job holding a job starting a business keeping a business in business.
00:28:38.652 --> 00:28:43.139
You know, eating food's not difficult. Breathing air is not difficult because
00:28:43.139 --> 00:28:44.526
we can do that without thinking.
00:28:45.176 --> 00:28:48.439
We just can't, right? I mean, if you think about it, we don't even have to think
00:28:48.439 --> 00:28:51.349
about breathing. It's just something- You don't think about it.
00:28:51.349 --> 00:28:54.081
It's the autonomic nervous system. It just happens. Exactly.
00:28:54.586 --> 00:28:59.569
But so many things in our lives today require more work. And I just thought
00:28:59.569 --> 00:29:02.266
about something and you're going to be like, duh, Jim, of course.
00:29:02.789 --> 00:29:06.728
You go back a thousand years, 5,000 years, 10,000 years, whatever.
00:29:08.819 --> 00:29:11.610
We are the same human being they say that,
00:29:12.742 --> 00:29:16.479
we look the same same brain and so forth but look at all the things that we
00:29:16.479 --> 00:29:19.629
have in our lives now all we had to worry about and don't get me wrong i want
00:29:19.629 --> 00:29:25.710
to live today not a thousand years ago right but all we had to worry about is,
00:29:26.825 --> 00:29:28.561
eating drinking,
00:29:29.977 --> 00:29:37.091
surviving, sleeping, reproducing, which we didn't have to do to survive,
00:29:37.091 --> 00:29:40.229
but it was in us to do it, to pass our genes on.
00:29:40.664 --> 00:29:47.247
Absolutely. And then another day, it wasn't a complicated life. Nope. It wasn't.
00:29:48.841 --> 00:29:52.391
And there are still tribes today, a few of them are on this globe,
00:29:52.391 --> 00:29:55.055
communities that live a very simple life.
00:29:55.525 --> 00:29:57.342
We've overcomplicated it.
00:29:57.841 --> 00:29:59.919
And so it is hard, I guess.
00:30:00.601 --> 00:30:10.031
And for me, I work really hard at managing today's world in 2026 in the United
00:30:10.031 --> 00:30:14.256
States with the technology and all the expectations.
00:30:14.599 --> 00:30:18.441
You know, you need to save in a 401k. You need a healthcare plan.
00:30:18.441 --> 00:30:21.582
You need to go to the doctor. These other people don't have doctors.
00:30:21.948 --> 00:30:25.491
I'm just saying, you know, the car, oh, you'd have to drive it.
00:30:25.491 --> 00:30:27.901
You have to have a license. You have to insure it. You have to have a garage
00:30:27.901 --> 00:30:30.673
door opener. You have to have tires. You have to get the brakes checked.
00:30:31.549 --> 00:30:35.011
Oh, think of all these things. These are just little stuff. There's a million
00:30:35.011 --> 00:30:38.501
things. Too much. What do they say? Mo' money, mo' problems, right?
00:30:39.061 --> 00:30:45.821
Exactly. That's why I like to live in a tent. But yeah, it's, so it's.
00:30:47.961 --> 00:30:55.461
It's tough. So getting back to quality time remaining, when I read the title of your book, QTR,
00:30:57.335 --> 00:31:04.027
I think of the fact that I don't have more than 30 or 40 years left,
00:31:04.590 --> 00:31:07.870
which some people might say. According to the actuaries, yes. Yes.
00:31:08.056 --> 00:31:13.001
For someone who looks at me at my age, they're like, that's a lot of time.
00:31:13.373 --> 00:31:19.961
Because actually, if you look at the numbers, averages, which can't really go
00:31:19.961 --> 00:31:25.099
by those for the most part, but if you are, I'm supposed to die within 20 years. Right.
00:31:26.341 --> 00:31:27.253
Once again...
00:31:29.006 --> 00:31:32.773
They factor in a lot of things. People die of weird stuff that I probably won't die of.
00:31:33.180 --> 00:31:37.489
Men. Probably. Well, that's because of your choices. And that's a really important
00:31:37.489 --> 00:31:42.369
thing for folks to think about as well, is we can extend our life beyond what
00:31:42.369 --> 00:31:45.358
the calculators say and what the actuaries say.
00:31:45.893 --> 00:31:51.709
We can shorten our life by doing risky activities or bad physical habits or
00:31:52.009 --> 00:31:53.642
bad financial habits, for that matter.
00:31:54.054 --> 00:32:00.202
Um, we can, we have more control than we give ourselves credit for. That's what I would say.
00:32:00.655 --> 00:32:05.849
And what I love about it is that, um, you can live as a victim or you can live
00:32:05.849 --> 00:32:10.104
as a conqueror, the person who's driving the bus, if you will, of your own life.
00:32:10.475 --> 00:32:16.704
I just, I gave up being a victim a long time ago because why do I give someone else the power? Um.
00:32:17.849 --> 00:32:22.620
Why? And that's how I raised my kids was I said, don't give don't give someone else the power.
00:32:23.056 --> 00:32:26.585
You are the arbiter of your own choices.
00:32:27.160 --> 00:32:31.706
You tell me what you want to do. Now, I'm here to give you wisdom and experience
00:32:31.706 --> 00:32:34.027
and hopefully advice that you might heed.
00:32:34.856 --> 00:32:38.516
My hope is that I give you resources. So just like we would,
00:32:38.876 --> 00:32:43.056
everyone listening is doing this with their families and probably with themselves.
00:32:43.056 --> 00:32:48.806
What I want to encourage you to do is look at it in the sense of if you know
00:32:48.806 --> 00:32:53.027
where you're going and you make a plan, you're likely to get there.
00:32:53.404 --> 00:32:56.646
What I can tell you from personal experience in just writing this book,
00:32:56.646 --> 00:32:59.676
you know, one of the reasons I wrote it was to help pay off.
00:32:59.676 --> 00:33:02.057
You and I have talked about this before, student loans that,
00:33:02.716 --> 00:33:04.060
you know, we took out for our kids.
00:33:04.327 --> 00:33:07.536
Because at the time the kids were going into college, you know,
00:33:07.856 --> 00:33:14.016
I was still learning about money and that sort of thing. and I hadn't made plans before to do so.
00:33:14.690 --> 00:33:17.896
Well, the thing is, looking back, I'm going, oh my gosh. You know,
00:33:18.236 --> 00:33:22.526
just putting out that, writing it down and saying, I will not be 89 years old
00:33:22.526 --> 00:33:23.878
when these loans are paid off.
00:33:24.407 --> 00:33:26.520
We got them paid off about six months ago.
00:33:27.415 --> 00:33:31.446
Only through intentionality. Just like you're doing every day with your health,
00:33:31.446 --> 00:33:33.567
with your money, your relationships.
00:33:34.316 --> 00:33:38.769
Yes. And something I did differently than you, and I'm not saying that.
00:33:40.486 --> 00:33:46.247
It was better as it's different is when my kids were born, I got them 529 plans,
00:33:46.247 --> 00:33:47.806
which are college funds. Okay.
00:33:48.270 --> 00:33:52.734
Because I understood that if we start early and we're intentional,
00:33:53.639 --> 00:33:55.887
everyone knows they're going to college because we have the fund,
00:33:55.887 --> 00:33:58.683
right? So there was partly mental. Well, if we have the fund,
00:33:59.014 --> 00:34:00.778
you're going to college, which we wanted to encourage.
00:34:01.161 --> 00:34:04.708
And then I also knew something about compounding interest over time.
00:34:05.091 --> 00:34:08.621
And so my wife and I were disciplined and we put a little bit of money in.
00:34:08.958 --> 00:34:13.687
And honestly, though, we didn't have enough money in the two funds for my son
00:34:13.687 --> 00:34:17.444
and my daughter to fully fund their college, but it was really the lion's share.
00:34:17.897 --> 00:34:22.347
And it was helpful because when we did do it, we were able to cash flow it and
00:34:22.347 --> 00:34:24.840
we didn't have to get loans or they didn't either.
00:34:26.419 --> 00:34:29.461
And these are things that I guess people don't think about.
00:34:31.202 --> 00:34:35.177
I always think about these things. I don't know. Well, that's okay.
00:34:35.177 --> 00:34:37.013
Just take these two stories, folks.
00:34:37.617 --> 00:34:42.377
Take Jim's story of, you know, we got a 529. We did our best to fund it.
00:34:42.377 --> 00:34:45.667
We still needed to cash flow it. So we had some other payments there and there,
00:34:45.667 --> 00:34:48.194
but we didn't take out loans. Listen to Steve's story.
00:34:48.908 --> 00:34:54.730
I remember the day and where I was, I was in Manhattan, New York City.
00:34:56.023 --> 00:35:01.357
And one of my representatives i was in my mid-20s and i was running a group
00:35:01.357 --> 00:35:05.747
of independent manufacturers reps and this guy was easily twice my age,
00:35:06.207 --> 00:35:10.597
maybe more and he's going oh you guys are having a baby congratulations that's
00:35:10.597 --> 00:35:12.573
so great you should get a 529,
00:35:13.548 --> 00:35:17.607
and i'm like okay well what's that so i had someone tell me about it he goes
00:35:17.607 --> 00:35:20.352
just put anything you can put 50 bucks a month then.
00:35:20.758 --> 00:35:23.759
Now you got to realize this was a long time ago for me.
00:35:23.968 --> 00:35:28.131
And I'm like, I can't imagine. I don't have 50 bucks in my pocket. I can't, you know?
00:35:28.311 --> 00:35:33.018
And so these two stories, while very parallel, I didn't have the belief.
00:35:34.487 --> 00:35:37.972
And that's what I want to give everybody. Jim, you had it, right?
00:35:37.972 --> 00:35:43.427
And you had some other awareness of these things, this wisdom, right?
00:35:43.647 --> 00:35:47.572
But the thing that separates the haves and have-nots is exactly what we're talking
00:35:47.572 --> 00:35:51.942
about, is the knowledge and the language to be able to say, this is what I'm
00:35:51.942 --> 00:35:54.438
thinking about. This is how I get there.
00:35:55.092 --> 00:35:58.722
I should probably do something about this. And frankly, I was just trying to
00:35:58.722 --> 00:36:02.952
get through it day to day, paycheck to paycheck, until I didn't,
00:36:02.952 --> 00:36:04.532
until I stopped being a victim.
00:36:06.611 --> 00:36:12.582
Well, and most people, most people don't know what they don't know.
00:36:12.582 --> 00:36:16.346
It's, it's hard. It's, it's, there's, like I said, you can know.
00:36:16.932 --> 00:36:23.262
Yeah. Right. You can make the plan. So on that note, in the description of this
00:36:23.262 --> 00:36:27.652
podcast, all the information you need to know about getting a copy of this book.
00:36:27.652 --> 00:36:33.852
Also, for those of you who actually have the ability to book a great speaker
00:36:33.852 --> 00:36:39.002
and talk to your group, well, Steve can do that as well. And he loves doing that, don't you, buddy?
00:36:39.571 --> 00:36:45.492
I do. I do. In fact, my favorite thing is to, I mean, I've spoken to small groups.
00:36:46.312 --> 00:36:51.722
I think I mentioned to you that we really like doing like weekend retreats with
00:36:51.722 --> 00:36:52.672
couples and that sort of thing.
00:36:52.672 --> 00:36:56.962
But really, the bread and butter is large conferences.
00:36:56.962 --> 00:37:01.662
And so it's great to have a couple thousand people in a room and talk about
00:37:01.662 --> 00:37:06.532
something that they've never talked about with anyone, maybe with their spouse,
00:37:06.532 --> 00:37:08.652
but then they're talking amongst each other.
00:37:08.972 --> 00:37:12.235
It's just the energy in the room changes completely.
00:37:12.612 --> 00:37:16.122
And I know that 90% of them are not going to, they're going to be like,
00:37:16.122 --> 00:37:19.607
well, when's golf, you know, but if I could just get the 10%,
00:37:19.903 --> 00:37:22.982
if I can reach people who are already going, I was thinking about this,
00:37:22.982 --> 00:37:24.640
but I didn't have a way to get there.
00:37:24.942 --> 00:37:29.432
Now you've got the blueprint you've got the framework you've got the 90 day
00:37:29.432 --> 00:37:33.243
plan everybody needs the book everybody.
00:37:34.758 --> 00:37:40.917
Get the book read the book use the book make sure you have a plan there's a
00:37:41.120 --> 00:37:44.336
planner in the book right to plan yes so.
00:37:45.956 --> 00:37:50.118
You're you're doing yourself and if you have a family um,
00:37:51.004 --> 00:37:54.781
you're, you're doing them a disservice. Now, if you don't have a family and
00:37:54.781 --> 00:37:59.831
it's just you and you don't care, that's fine, but you can have a better life.
00:37:59.831 --> 00:38:03.601
I think if you do the right thing, that person is listening to this podcast,
00:38:03.601 --> 00:38:07.508
but if you are, all I'm saying is, what do you want? Yeah.
00:38:07.920 --> 00:38:13.644
And go after it, go get it. And, and I understand sort of because I'm different,
00:38:14.044 --> 00:38:17.371
that it is difficult for people. I appreciate that it is for me.
00:38:18.011 --> 00:38:24.021
I'm a different animal and And I spend so much time doing weird stuff as far
00:38:24.021 --> 00:38:30.228
as health and finance and trying to do the right thing to have a quality life bringing on success.
00:38:31.349 --> 00:38:35.256
I think I speak a different language than most Americans. And I didn't always know that.
00:38:35.482 --> 00:38:38.634
I mean, I didn't know that. I mean, I start talking to people and they're like,
00:38:38.797 --> 00:38:42.991
no, I haven't done that. Or I'm afraid to do that. If I get life insurance,
00:38:42.991 --> 00:38:43.893
it means I'm going to die.
00:38:44.282 --> 00:38:47.568
No, get life insurance for your family, you idiot.
00:38:47.939 --> 00:38:52.089
Well, no, that's morbid. It's not. It's called responsible.
00:38:52.362 --> 00:38:56.991
And if you die, your family will spit on your grave if you don't have it.
00:38:56.991 --> 00:38:59.871
It really is true. Well, let's not go crazy.
00:39:00.191 --> 00:39:04.611
I mean, maybe they won't spit, but look, I tell you what, you just made me think
00:39:04.611 --> 00:39:07.762
of something that's really important for folks to know is in addition to the,
00:39:08.134 --> 00:39:12.491
the, the four rules that are in quality time remaining to help you come up with
00:39:12.491 --> 00:39:14.763
your own blueprint or framework, if you will,
00:39:15.198 --> 00:39:17.938
and then make your action plan in the back.
00:39:18.153 --> 00:39:24.092
Now, when I was writing this, what I did is I added a section called the Red Book.
00:39:24.272 --> 00:39:29.431
See, in my house, it gives Joanne great peace of mind to know that there is
00:39:29.431 --> 00:39:31.783
one red binder in the fire safe.
00:39:32.044 --> 00:39:35.871
And that has the attorney, the will, the durable power of attorney.
00:39:35.871 --> 00:39:39.179
In other words, all of the important stuff and all the important people,
00:39:39.434 --> 00:39:41.518
their contact information is in one place.
00:39:41.634 --> 00:39:44.699
Yeah. So that if something happens, she knows where to go.
00:39:45.286 --> 00:39:50.691
That takes the scary out, right? It's handled. Well, I wasn't going to include
00:39:50.691 --> 00:39:55.048
it. And then, believe it or not, I finished writing this. It was...
00:39:55.989 --> 00:39:59.489
It was the weekend after Thanksgiving. And then my kid brother,
00:39:59.489 --> 00:40:01.475
Chris, passed away December 1st.
00:40:02.131 --> 00:40:05.929
I mean, we're talking days later. If God wasn't telling me to do this,
00:40:05.929 --> 00:40:07.343
I don't know what to make of it.
00:40:07.779 --> 00:40:11.593
And I said, well, here's the thing. Chris was living in Los Angeles, California.
00:40:12.968 --> 00:40:16.875
My parents at the time were in their late 80s. They're in Kansas City, Missouri.
00:40:17.856 --> 00:40:21.599
He left without a will. They didn't have his password for his phone.
00:40:21.599 --> 00:40:23.383
They couldn't get into his email account.
00:40:23.667 --> 00:40:27.059
No information on his banking. By the way, he left no money,
00:40:27.059 --> 00:40:31.189
but he left two storage units filled with stuff that my aging parents had to
00:40:31.189 --> 00:40:34.168
deal with halfway across North America.
00:40:35.550 --> 00:40:39.462
I swear to you, I will never let someone experience that again.
00:40:40.455 --> 00:40:46.433
So the Red Book is a very simple way to approach those very difficult conversations
00:40:46.700 --> 00:40:50.179
that you just talked about and just start writing down the things that, you know,
00:40:50.859 --> 00:40:56.063
what do I want to have happen to the things that I own? What would I like to do with this?
00:40:56.313 --> 00:41:00.028
But it's very, very, what I would call approachable.
00:41:00.168 --> 00:41:05.804
It's not legalese. It's a great way to start a conversation to make some documentation
00:41:06.013 --> 00:41:09.399
so that should something happen or should you want to go see an attorney and
00:41:09.399 --> 00:41:14.100
really get the documents fleshed out, you're already 90% of the way there.
00:41:14.500 --> 00:41:21.789
So it's crammed with useful stuff No doubts about it But I hope everyone will
00:41:21.789 --> 00:41:24.043
let us know You know, what do you think about this?
00:41:24.386 --> 00:41:29.535
What do you challenge? What do you not believe in? What are you not seeing that Jim and I are seeing?
00:41:29.866 --> 00:41:34.699
I would love to hear Great, and so your contact information is located in the
00:41:34.699 --> 00:41:39.819
description So they can get a hold of you And you can always contact me as well
00:41:39.819 --> 00:41:43.200
Well, Steve, as always, thank you so much for joining me today I really appreciate it,
00:41:43.929 --> 00:41:49.728
been awesome it's my pleasure and let's do this again soon let's do it thank you Jim thank you buddy.