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What if I told you there's a mental toughness skill that used by elite athletes and performers and successful leaders, and most of us have access to it, but rarely use it intentionally?
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And it doesn't require any special equipment or expensive courses or even a lot of time.
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And here it is.
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You can practice it by sitting in your car before a difficult conversation, while you're drinking your morning coffee, or just before you walk into a meeting, and I'm talking about visualization.
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Now, before you start picturing yourself sitting on the beach, imagining a multimillion dollars magically appearing in your bank account, that's not what we're talking about today.
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Visualization is much more practical than that.
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And when you learn how to use it, it can help you prepare for challenges, manage your response to pressure, and build confidence in your ability to take action, my friend.
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Hey, welcome back to Brave Moves.
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I'm Julie DeLucca Collins.
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And today, we're talking about the skill that I think deserves more attention, mental toughness.
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And when we hear that phrase, we often picture someone pushing through being exhausted and refusing to quit or powering through something very difficult.
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But I think mental toughness also includes our ability to prepare ourselves for uncomfortable situations and to respond when things don't go according to plan.
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I think this has been one of the skills that has helped me throughout my life, and I didn't even know that I was doing this.
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One way we can practice this is through visualization.
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Now, athletes have been using mental rehearsal for decades.
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They imagine themselves performing specific movements, responding to challenges, and executing skills before they physically do them.
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Now, the most famous one that I can think of is Michael Phelps.
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And while most of us are not preparing for the Olympics, we are preparing for things that require courage.
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Maybe it's asking for a raise or giving a presentation, starting a business, or having a conversation you've been avoiding.
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My friend, visualization can help us practice how we want to show up before the moment arrives.
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Now, here is how it works.
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Here's something fascinating about our brains.
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When we vividly imagine performing an action, some of the same brain regions involved in actually performing that action become active.
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And that doesn't mean imagining something is exactly the same thing as doing it.
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It isn't.
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But mental rehearsal can support preparation, skill development, especially when we combine it with real practice.
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And I think that's an important distinction because it isn't about pretending everything will go perfectly.
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It's about y- giving yourself an opportunity to mentally rehearse what you want to do, including how you might respond when something unexpected happens.
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Think about the last time you were nervous about something.
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Maybe you were preparing for that important presentation that landed on your lap, and how much time did you spend imagining what could go wrong?
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What if I forget what I'm going to say?
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Now, I have a friend that I traveled with not too long ago, and she was told that she needed to do this big presentation, and she was really freaking out.
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And one of the things that I mentioned is,"My friend, listen, all you need to do is stop worrying about whether or not you'll forget something or whether or not people like you.
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What I want you to think about is what are you going to say, and rehearse it." We're actually pretty good at always coming up and mentally rehearsing the disaster, maybe forgetting what to answer or embarrassing ourselves.
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But sometimes we do it without realizing, and that's really detrimental.
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So I want you to think about what can we do to be more intentional about practicing in our minds.
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So let me give you three simple steps.
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Number one is you wanna choose the specific moment.
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Get specific.
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Don't just imagine yourself being successful, confident, or happy.
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Choose one situation you're preparing for.
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When I was getting ready to do my TED Talk, and I walked onto that stage, but I had practiced that in my mind even before I applied to do a TED Talk.
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And that's exactly what I want you to think about.
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Think of a specific moment.
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Maybe you're about to walk into a networking event and w- you don't know anybody there.
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Instead of imagining yourself magically becoming the most confident and popular person in the room, picture yourself walking through the door.
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Imagine looking around at all of the tables, taking a deep breath, and approaching one person.
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See yourself smiling, introducing yourself, and that's it.
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You're practicing a behavior you can actually control.
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And here's why I like this approach.
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When we make something specific, it becomes easier to identify, and the action we need to take becomes doable.
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And you don't have to figure out how to become completely different at who you are.
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You just have to become the person that practices who you wanna become one step at a time Now, this is where I think visualization becomes especially useful for mental toughness.
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A lot of people think visualization means imagining everything going exactly the way they want, but life rarely operates that way, and it's not always aligned with our perfectly mental scripts.
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So I want you to think and imagine realistic challenge.
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That's, let's say maybe that presentation, right?
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And picture yourself speaking clearly and feeling prepared.
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Then imagine losing your train of thought.
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Okay, that's scary, right?
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Okay, so what do you do?
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Maybe you pause, take a breath, glance at your notes, and continue.
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Or imagine someone asking a question you don't know the answer to.
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You may practice saying,"Okay, that's a great question.
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I wanna make sure that I give you an accurate answer, so let me follow up." Simple.
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You don't have to be perfect at everything and having all the answers.
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People understand that sometimes there are things that we need to make sure that we have all the information for.
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And by the way, when I ask a tough question of someone and they say to me,"I'll come back to you," I appreciate that because I would rather them do that than give me just something that they pulled out of their ass.
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Okay.
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So I love that because...
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And remember, confidence doesn't require us to believe that nothing will go wrong.
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It grows when we begin to trust ourselves to handle the challenges, and that's a skill we can practice Now, I want you to think about the third step, and here's connect your visualization into one small action.
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Now, here's the part I really want you to remember.
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Visualization works best as preparation for action.
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You can imagine yourself doing something all day long, but at some point you're going to have to go do it, and this is where my Tiny Habits training comes into play.
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After you've spent a minute or two mentally rehearsing a situation, identify one small action you can take.
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If you're visualizing yourself giving a presentation, practice the first few seconds out loud.
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Or if you're preparing for a difficult conversation, write down the first sentence you want to say.
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Or lastly, thinking about attending that network event, send the RSVP.
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That's your small little action, and then mentally rehearse the actions that come next.
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And keep it small so that you can follow through because every time you take action, you're giving yourself real experience to build on, and next time you visualize that situation, you're not going to be imagining something completely unfamiliar.
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You're building on something you're already practiced.
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I've heard it say that there's some lead athletes like surfers for instance, when they're visualizing, they actually lay down on their boards so that they can smell the wax, and they can feel the board beneath them, and that's the same thing, right?
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For us, I think that we begin to think we're gonna visualize, but we are not really training our brain and giving ourselves the environment because listen, our senses are so keen to helping us see that moment.
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So if you're gonna be doing that presentation, maybe you wanna have your hands on your keyboard, or maybe you wanna have the little clicker for your presentation, or maybe you wanna reach out your hand as if you're gonna be shaking it with somebody.
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Whatever it is, close your eyes and think about what can you do to make the visualization simple but clear and really live, right?
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Now, here's your brave move for today.
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I want you to try this.
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Find two minutes when you can sit quietly without any distractions and think about one situation coming up that makes you feel a little nervous or uncertain.
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Now close your eyes, and if you're comfortable doing so, picture yourself entering that situation.
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Imagine the environment and notice what you might hear or see.
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Then rehearse one specific action you want to take.
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Next, imagine one small challenge and how you're going to respond.
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And finally, my friend, ask yourself,"What is the one thing that I can do to prepare?" And then do that one thing, maybe sending the email, practicing a sentence, putting something on your calendar.
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Remember, the goal isn't to eliminate every uncomfortable feeling.
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It's to practice moving forward when things feel uncertain.
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I wanna leave you with this thought.
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How much time do you spend imagining everything that could go wrong compared with the time that you imagine preparing yourself to handle what may happen?
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We already have the ability to imagine future situations, and we are started using the ability more If we started using the ability more intentionally, the next time you're preparing for something challenging, give yourself a moment to mentally rehearse how you want to respond.
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Picture the action, prepare for the obstacle, and then take one small step in real life.
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Because mental toughness is something we can practice, and visualization is one tool that can help us do it.
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Now, thank you for taking the time to be with Brave Moves today and hanging with me.
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If you know someone preparing for something that feels a little intimidating, share this episode with them.
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And remember, a review goes a long way, my friend.
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And remember, go confidently in the direction of your dreams.
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Until tomorrow.