3.26 Why Are We Optimizing Fucking Everything?

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Welcome to Before You Cut Bangs.
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I'm Laura Quick.
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I'm a professional storyteller and I'm writing my first book.
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And I'm Claire Fearman.
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I'm a therapist, but not your therapist.
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Full disclaimer: take what you like, leave the rest.
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Speaking of optimization.
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I went to get a little Botox.
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And I was in a hurry.
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And Dr.
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Carl bruised me.
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No one's been beating me.
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In case y'all are wondering if you can see that I have a small faint black eye.
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That's just me getting a little Botox.
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So, but we're talking about optimization today because we think everybody's optimizing the shit out of everything.
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And it's kind of defeating the whole purpose, right?
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Of like life.
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You guys texted me a year ago or something, like, hey, Will, will you get Botox for the show?
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And I was like, sure.
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Well, bring on Dr.
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Carl.
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We can bring him in, but he'll probably give you a black eye.
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It just reminded me I have questions.
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I never followed up.
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I never knew what that was about.
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Dr.
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Carl would probably come on.
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I don't know.
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No.
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I don't think he would.
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I don't know.
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As soon as you said that boat, I was like, wait a minute.
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I remember getting a text from you guys.
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I love him.
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Good memory.
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Yeah.
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How do you optimize your life?
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Uh schedule.
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I don't know.
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Do you have like weird alarm clocks or like special powder?
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How's your how's your AI um assistant going?
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Well, good, because you know, the that one we talked about a year ago or whatever, it wasn't really where I wanted it to be yet.
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So I only did it for like a month and got rid of it.
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But now just Gemini uh does a pretty good job because it has my calendar.
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And so that was the thing.
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Like it when it writes a response for me for me to proof, like it already knows.
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It says, Hey, here are the available times that I could meet with you or whatever.
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It's pretty cool.
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I double check every time, but I'm like, yeah, those are the available times that I have.
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So yeah, I mean that's one way you optimize.
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Yeah, for sure.
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Clear, clear.
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Now this does happen to us.
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Forgot a meeting yesterday.
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To optimize something I've done recently and to start optimizing, as you know, I struggle with um chronic optimism when it comes to chronic time optimism.
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Yes, yes.
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And it's something I'm thinking about coining as a phrase, if you will.
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And um, something I've done, historical me, when making an appointment for myself, will put it in much earlier than it actually is and block out a time.
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And future me, depending on how far away the appointment is, won't remember historical me, lied.
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Okay.
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So recently, within the last week, I went to a lunch that I had in Auburn and arrived an hour early and sat at a table.
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No, and also text the lady and was like, I might be seven minutes behind.
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And she was like, Well, our appointment's in an hour and 15 minutes.
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And I was like, Abs, you know what?
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I'm probably gonna be fine.
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I'm gonna be right there.
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Didn't want to make her feel bad, but I'm like, damn, I've I try to over-optimize my schedule so much, like pre-plan for this.
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Imagine what you could have fit in that time.
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Chronic time.
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Oh, I just I got so much done.
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I just sat in that little corner of 1856 waiting for my tasting menu to arrive and just emailed and they kept checking on me.
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Do you need anything else, Miss Quick?
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No, I'm actually fine.
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Thank you.
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So I'm still fine from the eight times you checked.
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They're so good there.
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But I felt awkward.
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I was like, if you'll just bring me another coffee, that'd be great.
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And my first wife puts things on my calendar for me 30 minutes early, and it drives me crazy.
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Wait, she knows.
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She thinks she didn't like that I'm like, you're not the only one.
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Chronic.
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A few minutes late to everything.
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Chronic time optimization or um optimism.
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You're welcome.
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Yes.
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Like, okay, so the game starts at 5 30.
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I'm like, the hell it does.
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I know it starts at 6.
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Don't you're not, don't tempt me.
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Don't don't trick me.
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Don't trick me.
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So when you hear the word optimize, optimization, efficiency.
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Okay.
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That's what I think of.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I mean, that makes sense.
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I'm not good at this, by the way.
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I mean, I try.
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I like attempt.
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Y'all are really hooked on the schedule thing.
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Well, it's not just scheduling.
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I think it's uh water intake.
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Um, you know, like I have a planner, and in my planner, every week there is uh what are the big three things I'm gonna accomplish this week?
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What are what did I fail at last week?
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What adjustments do I want to make?
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How what are the three ways I'm going to consistently take care of my body this week?
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Like it's all in there.
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And so I'll say, like, okay, I need to increase my water intake to 5,000 gallons a day, obviously.
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Um, I need to walk 10,000 steps and I need to do this, and I should work out three times, and I'm a workout girly now, obviously.
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I'm gonna take a nice hike with my boyfriend.
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So imagine handing that calendar to a working woman in like 1985 with all of these optimization options in there.
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I didn't even drink water until I was 33 years old.
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That's what I mean.
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The age of Jesus when he left the earth.
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I did not start drinking water until I was 33.
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What does that mean?
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Like purposefully, like uh intentionally drinking water or you didn't have water.
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Like what do you mean?
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I did not live in a third world country.
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Well, that's what I'm saying.
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Like right now, you say like you plan how much water you're gonna drink during the weekend.
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I want you to think that the the water intake was mostly if I ordered a gray goose and water.
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It wasn't like, let me hit up this bottle of water, and nobody was walking around with baby-sized containers filling up their water at filling stations.
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That wasn't happening.
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I lived on Diet Coke.
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What do you mean?
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Yeah, I guess that.
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That's that was the question.
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Yeah, and I looked, my skin was flawless.
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It is wild.
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It's great.
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I mean, I remember being in college and like the when now genes got really popular, and it just had never occurred to me to have a water bottle, you know, that was wild.
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How dare what do you mean?
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Have a water bottle?
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Why would we drink that?
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They were so like children.
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I joke, these girls walk it around with it a while.
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I'm always like, is that heavy?
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Because it feels like it's probably 13 pounds.
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I'm not sure that Bertie even drinks the water, but it is about the container.
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And the stickers.
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Yes, the stickers that go on the containers.
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Very important.
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Okay, what do you think optimization is?
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Um, well, the reason I texted it to you the other day is because um everybody's doing it.
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Um I just hear so much about like biohacking and the best way to do that.
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And we should eat this way, and you have to do this kind of exercise.
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And um, but not even just in the health and wellness world.
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It's like, you know, slow fashion versus fast fashion.
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It's like we we're even optimizing shopping at a thrift store, like everything seemingly has to be right.
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This is just in my mind, okay.
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I don't y'all don't have to agree.
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That's why I wanted to bring it up.
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And what hurt my heart is kind of, I mean, you said are we're missing the whole point, right?
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And to me, what what made me so sad, I wasn't crying about it.
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What's a different word?
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Alarmed.
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Um, 911, there's a possum.
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Um shocked, a lot of feelings was are you paying attention to just what is right now?
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Like right here in front of you, and it doesn't have to be perfect, and it doesn't have to be right, and I don't have to optimize it.
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And then what are we teaching, particularly um adolescents?
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I'm giving a big concept with with two different theories with it, but um so when a kid is about 12, like early puberty, they're kind of the same in the brain as when they're two.
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So they suck, first of all, but also two-year-olds like become little people.
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Like, remember when your kids are two?
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Like it is fun.
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Starting to walk and talk and have a personality sponges, and you're like, oh my gosh, that's who you are.
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Well, 11, 12-year-olds do the same thing.
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Like, we bash middle school age um so much because their hormonal twists, and I get it, but also they're just like interested in things.
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And um, this American Life just did this whole episode on it, and they're like figuring out who they are and what they like, and they can retain, retain, retain.
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So, fast forward to like our age group, and we're all like put your creatine in your water, and like I do that.
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I did, it's here in a jar.
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She's drinking it right now while she's talking shit.
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She's literally going to be.
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I'm not talking shit, like there are things that I do.
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I'm I'm worried about what we're telling younger people of the certain way you have to be to optimize and like for what?
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Like longevity, happiness, because in my practice, I treat people that can't pay me to super wealthy people, um, healthy, unhealthy, I mean like physical bodied, and like I'm not able to measure happiness by all that.
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And so that's what I want to know from the people, what y'all think.
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Does optimization of all these things that we're being?
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I mean, we live in such consumerism, obviously.
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We're being marketed all the time, all the things.
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Um, you're the question is, do you think it's making us happier?
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Is that what you're asking?
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Yeah, some of it is like I agree.
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Like the uh, you know, I I like robots, these these things that can do things for me that were taking a lot of time.
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So the vacuum mop robot is like has completely changed my life.
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Now, because we're ex we've expanded our the llor.
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Did you get a lumber?
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My buddy just got one and he's obsessed.
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Now my yard like a roomba for the yard, yes, and it has lines in it.
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It's beautiful.
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But you still have to go and work in the yard, right?
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You still have to go and weed it and edge and do stuff.
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So I'm still working the yard, it's just so much more efficient because I'm not spending five to six hours on the actual cutting.
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Yeah, it does that every day.
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And then I go and do the work in the flower buds and work in the you know, whatever.
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So okay.
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I think yes and no.
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I mean, I do think that structure is my best friend.
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The more structured my days can be, the more, the more I can find time to be happy.
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And what I mean by that is I feel more grateful when I feel like I'm not disappointing people or disappointing myself.
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So checking boxes for me is a way that makes me feel in order, right?
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So I don't do a lot of the I don't drink creatine.
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I've just started, you know, I just got on board with water in the last 10 years.
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So like I mean, it could take me Wait till you find vegetables.
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Wait till you I do eat vegetables.
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Obviously, I grew up, my grandparents had a farm.
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I love fresh vegetables and I cook every night.
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Every night's why I was surprised, honestly, when you said that about the water.
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And I was like, what do you mean?
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I know it's wild, but I just genuinely I I mean, my this is a real, it's a rumor.
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I can't confirm or deny it, but like I was told that my dad put Pepsi in my bottle as a baby.
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Like, that's not a that's real.
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Like women in my family were like, Yeah, your dad used to just give you some Pepsi.
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And I'd be like, Well, that explains it.
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And it wasn't even Coke, it wasn't even Coke, but that's okay because Pepsi, we will take you as a sponsor right now.
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Thank you so much.
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Buffalo Rock.
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Hi.
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Um, anyways, my point in saying that is I think that there's I'm with Will.
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There's really good things that come from optimizing your time.
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And the reason I say that is because if you can optimize your time to do the things you feel you need to do or have to do, then it creates more space and time to do the things that we really have lost in art around doing, and that is rest.
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Like actually practicing what does it mean to rest?
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Okay, I moved into my new house last year around this time.
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Started dating this really cute guy like a couple months later, and then we're together all the time.
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Okay.
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I chose purposefully to do things I had never done before when I moved into this new space because I think it's easier to change your habits.
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Two of the things that I did that have dynamically changed my life is I did not put a TV up in my house.
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So there's no TV in my home at all.
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And the second thing is I've never slept with my phone beside my bed since I moved into the house ever.
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I just plug it up in my little butler's pantry and it's an old house built in the 1920s.
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So if that thing rings, I'll hear it.
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I'll get to you when I get to you.
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You might have to call twice, Clay, if you really need me in the middle of the night.
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But those two things have created things that I never thought I would do, like playing Jin Romi or Yahtzee every night over dinner.
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No noise, good music.
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I cook dinner, we sit down, or we have guests over and we really have a conversation.
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That's not what my life looked like before, but this reset allowed me to okay, let me do these things that do create optimization so I can do this stuff that I think is really important.
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And I would tell you, I think my happiness level is much, much higher because now I live in a neighborhood where I can walk every day, same as you.
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Like, and Will, you could hit your streets anytime.
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I mean, we we all three are really, really rich in when it comes to like where we live, walkability.
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I know my neighbors, and not that I didn't know my neighbors before, but like I know I have a Kravitz on my street.
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I know everything about everybody in the best way.
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Who needs the casserole?
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Let's get it going.
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But like, I know that's my dissertation on I love optimization, but I don't let it take over my life.
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There are just some things that create order for me that are really freaking good, like scheduling, like having a planner.
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And I'd love to give it to her in 1985, and it would change her life.
00:14:49.919 --> 00:14:54.240
I think she would become a much more efficient five-point strategy person.
00:14:54.960 --> 00:14:55.840
Look at her face.
00:14:55.919 --> 00:14:56.480
Why are you?
00:14:56.639 --> 00:14:57.840
You can barely hold it together.
00:14:58.080 --> 00:14:58.639
No, I'm fine.
00:14:58.879 --> 00:14:59.200
Go ahead.
00:14:59.360 --> 00:14:59.600
I'm great.
00:14:59.759 --> 00:15:00.559
Okay, your turn.
00:15:00.799 --> 00:15:03.840
Okay, so I I think y'all are right.
00:15:04.080 --> 00:15:09.360
And this is kind of like what I brought up in the last episode about like I have choice here.
00:15:09.600 --> 00:15:19.120
I saw this Instagram reel, and this guy's like, you know, from 4 to 4:30, I uh it was a weird version of meditation.
00:15:19.200 --> 00:15:19.759
I forget what it was.
00:15:19.840 --> 00:15:20.399
I hadn't heard of it.
00:15:20.480 --> 00:15:22.240
I think he made it up uh with my wife.
00:15:22.320 --> 00:15:26.080
And then from 4:30 to 5:30, we do our super duper working.
00:15:26.240 --> 00:15:28.000
It's like a day in the life, yeah.
00:15:28.159 --> 00:15:29.919
And it's like then we snort creative.
00:15:30.159 --> 00:15:32.480
Like it was just like the most intense thing.
00:15:33.679 --> 00:15:49.679
And then there was this like blip in there where he's like, then we get the kids up and get them to school, and then we journal, and I'm like, it was just like, and he was just like this dude, and um, it was stressful to me.
00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:57.440
His priorities might be different, and mine is having a slower morning with my kids, and I do take care of myself in all these ways.
00:15:57.519 --> 00:16:04.000
So I'm like, I I just don't know that optimization at that level where I'm booked from 4 a.m.
00:16:04.240 --> 00:16:15.039
until I close my eyes provides a ton for what we know to be true that leads into human happiness, which is usually connection.
00:16:15.919 --> 00:16:21.919
Well, okay, so two things I think drive this uh overachievers and comparison.
00:16:22.240 --> 00:16:33.279
So people who really think that their value comes from what they're achieving, optimization and consumerism can really get your ass because they're gonna be like, you know what?
00:16:33.519 --> 00:16:44.240
You think you're doing well in that creatine, but you got to get this NAD that you just shove up your ass every day, and then you're gonna have to snort the creatine because it's not getting to your bloodstream fast enough.
00:16:44.399 --> 00:16:47.519
And then you also need to start this journal that's gonna change your life.
00:16:47.759 --> 00:16:48.080
100%.
00:16:48.559 --> 00:16:51.600
But like, I think achievement and comparison.
00:16:51.759 --> 00:16:55.840
So we live in this like high achievers are the people getting everything done.
00:16:56.000 --> 00:17:06.559
And then on top of that, we are served these videos where someone's telling you how how productive, how much more productive their day is than yours.
00:17:06.880 --> 00:17:07.279
Yes.
00:17:07.519 --> 00:17:13.920
So I will say to people, if you're listening and you get hooked, you might not even think you're comparing.
00:17:14.079 --> 00:17:15.839
It might feel motivating.
00:17:16.079 --> 00:17:17.440
There's a difference there.
00:17:17.599 --> 00:17:26.480
But if you see something, you're like, oh my gosh, I need that product and I should wake up at five, I would pause and ask yourself, this is that magical pause.
00:17:26.720 --> 00:17:29.119
Am I thinking something negative about myself?
00:17:29.200 --> 00:17:30.720
Like, am I just not enough?
00:17:30.880 --> 00:17:32.880
You know, if I have this, I'll be happier.
00:17:33.039 --> 00:17:35.519
If you're in that place, I really wouldn't recommend it.
00:17:35.680 --> 00:17:38.319
But if you're like, man, I've been really wanting to get up earlier.
00:17:38.480 --> 00:17:41.839
I want to get up before I have to get my kids up so I can have my coffee alone.
00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:45.839
I think that is how I'm gonna show up better for myself and my family.
00:17:46.079 --> 00:17:47.359
That's a priority.
00:17:47.680 --> 00:17:48.880
That is different.
00:17:49.039 --> 00:17:50.160
That is optimizing.
00:17:50.240 --> 00:17:55.039
That's the lawnmower, that's the phone in the butler's pantry, like, no TV.
00:17:55.279 --> 00:17:59.200
But I think we have to understand the motivation and the intention behind it.
00:17:59.359 --> 00:18:01.359
Again, this is a Claire theory.
00:18:01.440 --> 00:18:03.279
I did not find published research.
00:18:03.359 --> 00:18:13.119
I'm sure there is at this point, but I think that's like my pitch to listeners is can you know where this is coming from and make conscious choice around it?
00:18:13.440 --> 00:18:14.559
Okay, question.
00:18:14.720 --> 00:18:20.559
What's one thing, Will, that you optimized too much and sucked the joy out of it?
00:18:20.799 --> 00:18:22.480
Oh, good question.
00:18:22.799 --> 00:18:26.640
You know, initially I really did resist the lawnmower because I enjoy cutting the grass.
00:18:26.799 --> 00:18:26.960
Yeah.
00:18:27.039 --> 00:18:27.440
I like the crazy.
00:18:27.599 --> 00:18:29.839
Well, now you're about to have a backyard that's the size of a golf course.
00:18:30.079 --> 00:18:33.759
Such a thing is like once I realized, like, oh dang, no, it takes six hours to push this.
00:18:33.839 --> 00:18:34.319
And I couldn't.
00:18:34.640 --> 00:18:37.359
And Danielle's like, okay, well, that's our time together for the week.
00:18:37.839 --> 00:18:38.720
I could be doing all this other stuff.
00:18:38.799 --> 00:18:39.680
So I don't I don't know.
00:18:39.839 --> 00:18:48.559
Um yeah, I'm not sure that because I don't use any uh agents, like AI agent stuff to for anything creative, right?
00:18:48.799 --> 00:18:56.559
Because I want to be able to make my brain make the connections, but I do use it to like you know, for plenty of stuff, but nothing creative.
00:18:56.799 --> 00:18:57.359
So I don't know.
00:18:57.440 --> 00:18:59.759
I don't know that I've done that yet.
00:19:00.079 --> 00:19:00.640
Hmm.
00:19:00.880 --> 00:19:03.039
You don't think uh this is crazy.
00:19:03.200 --> 00:19:05.519
The Labrador just gotta figure it out.
00:19:05.680 --> 00:19:06.880
All right, your turn.
00:19:07.200 --> 00:19:09.119
Um I don't have it all figured out.
00:19:09.200 --> 00:19:10.480
Let's let me just I I don't.
00:19:10.720 --> 00:19:12.559
I just don't I don't think I I'm messing with you.
00:19:12.799 --> 00:19:21.839
I know I just don't think I uh intentionally optimize like you guys have talked about how y'all uh are there's just a few things here and there I've done.
00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:26.880
Yeah, but you haven't you don't feel like you've like taken joy out of your life by optimizing too much.
00:19:27.039 --> 00:19:29.039
No, it gives me joy, yeah.
00:19:29.200 --> 00:19:29.519
Yeah.
00:19:29.759 --> 00:19:36.079
I was gonna say, I know the thing that I've done, and this is a part of just like over functioning for me.
00:19:37.119 --> 00:19:45.519
When I try to pack too many things in my day because I'm like, I just want to be, I just want to be so efficient and I need to meet all these people.
00:19:45.839 --> 00:19:50.559
I have found that if I do less things but can do them better.
00:19:50.799 --> 00:20:02.319
Meaning instead of packing my schedule with five in-person meetings or seven Zoom meetings, what if I only do two in-person meetings and two Zoom meetings?
00:20:02.559 --> 00:20:04.960
My capacity stays a bit better.
00:20:05.200 --> 00:20:18.319
But when I do that, when I over-function in that way and I over-optimize because I want my time to be as impactful and plant all those seeds and get all these great things done, I'm not happy.
00:20:18.400 --> 00:20:22.240
And I'm honestly not, I'm not cool to be around.
00:20:22.559 --> 00:20:24.720
Also, um, Adderall.
00:20:25.519 --> 00:20:29.599
I can only take that if I'm like at my house alone writing.
00:20:29.839 --> 00:20:30.880
No one can be around.
00:20:30.960 --> 00:20:39.920
Poor Zach came home sometimes when I was on Adderall and he'd be like, hey, babe, and he'd try to give me like a kiss on my head, and I'd be like, Don't you see I'm in the video?
00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:44.160
And he would be like, Oh you must be on your Adderall.
00:20:44.319 --> 00:20:45.680
And I'm like, that's right.
00:20:45.759 --> 00:20:50.799
That's why I never take this if I'm going to be around anyone ever.
00:20:51.200 --> 00:20:53.359
Man, similar related to that to you.
00:20:53.759 --> 00:21:02.079
Um mine is similar, and it's usually about overthinking every single minute of my day.
00:21:02.240 --> 00:21:07.279
It was probably an overcompensation from ADHD, like having like missed stuff.
00:21:07.519 --> 00:21:08.720
Um, that's one.
00:21:08.799 --> 00:21:17.440
And then the one that comes from comparison um seasonally is I'm like, I hate everything I wear, and this really isn't my vibe anymore.
00:21:17.599 --> 00:21:20.079
And so, like a reinventionful.
00:21:20.960 --> 00:21:22.559
And I'll like find the best deal.
00:21:23.119 --> 00:21:26.480
You get an anthropology ad serve to you, and you're like, you know what?
00:21:26.559 --> 00:21:27.519
I'm dumping everything.
00:21:27.680 --> 00:21:28.960
I gotta get rid of it.
00:21:29.200 --> 00:21:29.839
Get that.
00:21:30.160 --> 00:21:32.240
And so I will like way overdo it.
00:21:32.319 --> 00:21:35.359
And then I have so much anxiety and guilt about like spending.
00:21:35.599 --> 00:21:39.359
I'm like, that was not fun, and I'm not gonna like it, anyways.
00:21:39.680 --> 00:21:45.200
Um, so I think scheduling and uh reinventing my entire wardrobe turns not fun.
00:21:45.279 --> 00:21:48.240
Cause like that, I'm like, I'll just do a capsule wardrobe, you know?
00:21:48.319 --> 00:21:54.079
And like I'm not if you ever say that out loud, I'll at an intervention, I'll call Keith.
00:21:54.160 --> 00:21:56.160
Okay, we will invite a real problem.
00:21:56.480 --> 00:21:59.200
We will invite your ballet teacher from first grade.
00:21:59.359 --> 00:22:00.960
She will Be there with me.
00:22:01.119 --> 00:22:05.279
You are not a capsule wardrobe person, and you know that it is an impossibility.
00:22:05.680 --> 00:22:06.079
It is.
00:22:06.400 --> 00:22:07.039
Um, okay.
00:22:07.200 --> 00:22:10.319
I not that y'all could tell that today based on what she's wearing.
00:22:10.640 --> 00:22:12.319
Thank you, possum pearl.
00:22:12.640 --> 00:22:14.640
Which, by the way, is that possum out of my house yet?
00:22:14.799 --> 00:22:15.200
I don't know.
00:22:15.279 --> 00:22:16.720
Uh you're on a group text.
00:22:16.799 --> 00:22:17.200
You're not looking.
00:22:17.359 --> 00:22:18.160
I'm not on my phone.
00:22:18.319 --> 00:22:20.240
Okay, I'm optimizing right now.
00:22:20.400 --> 00:22:21.680
Okay, so moral of the story.
00:22:22.160 --> 00:22:22.799
Never mind the dog.
00:22:23.359 --> 00:22:24.880
The dog helped him find it.
00:22:25.200 --> 00:22:27.680
They said, Where did we say good for something?
00:22:27.839 --> 00:22:30.079
Where did we say this possum resides?
00:22:30.240 --> 00:22:30.799
Never mind.
00:22:30.880 --> 00:22:32.559
The doggo helped me.
00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:34.480
I guess they're on it.
00:22:34.640 --> 00:22:36.079
We'll do a part three next time.
00:22:36.240 --> 00:22:39.440
Um, okay, last thing, or maybe not, but close to it.
00:22:39.599 --> 00:22:43.519
Well, I'm really glad you clarified the AI piece.
00:22:43.759 --> 00:22:46.480
Um, I agree.
00:22:46.880 --> 00:22:51.119
Um, I was thinking back to when we interviewed Lindsay Miller.
00:22:51.440 --> 00:22:51.839
Mm-hmm.
00:22:52.000 --> 00:22:52.480
Neil.
00:22:52.640 --> 00:22:53.279
Yep.
00:22:54.079 --> 00:22:55.440
She's so cool.
00:22:55.680 --> 00:23:02.319
Um, and I have been, oh man, this is gonna combo our last episode and this one.
00:23:02.559 --> 00:23:04.799
Really needed rescued from finances.
00:23:05.200 --> 00:23:07.039
And like, if I had it, I had it.
00:23:07.119 --> 00:23:08.240
If I didn't, I didn't.
00:23:08.319 --> 00:23:11.519
And like it was just kind of like a live and let live, you know?
00:23:11.599 --> 00:23:13.519
Um, live and la vida loca.
00:23:14.160 --> 00:23:16.960
And uh never really worried about it.
00:23:17.039 --> 00:23:24.799
And then I was like, I should like plan for some things perhaps in the future, but it was really like head in the sand.
00:23:24.880 --> 00:23:30.799
And then every year I have to meet with my sweet accountant, and he's like, Did you do the things we talked about last year?
00:23:31.039 --> 00:23:34.319
And I'm like, I just like didn't want to, is the thing.
00:23:34.400 --> 00:23:35.920
And like I don't have a good reason.
00:23:36.079 --> 00:23:40.880
Like he's like, but we talked about these, you know, things you were gonna change.
00:23:40.960 --> 00:23:42.480
And I'm like, Well, I didn't.
00:23:42.880 --> 00:23:46.160
So here's$500 for you to fix it and pretend like I did do it.
00:23:46.240 --> 00:23:48.880
And he's like, Okay, this year.
00:23:49.519 --> 00:23:51.200
You walked in there and you're like, I did.
00:23:51.920 --> 00:23:58.960
I didn't, but oh wow, wow, redemption! I was really wanting this redemption.
00:23:59.519 --> 00:24:01.039
But we did make a change, okay.
00:24:02.079 --> 00:24:07.279
I came in with my notebook, okay, taking all proper prescribed medications for me that day.
00:24:07.359 --> 00:24:13.279
I was with him, I was focused, and I'm like, Brad, I'm sorry for my behavior in the past.
00:24:13.519 --> 00:24:18.400
I've just been hoping you could always fix everything, but I don't even know what's going on.
00:24:18.640 --> 00:24:20.319
And he was like, you know what?
00:24:20.799 --> 00:24:22.559
You need to learn how to use Claude.
00:24:22.720 --> 00:24:24.480
And I'm like, do I?
00:24:24.640 --> 00:24:30.079
Anyways, fast forward, I was like, I'm gonna start with my personal finances, business is actually easier.
00:24:30.319 --> 00:24:32.160
I let Claude see everything.
00:24:32.480 --> 00:24:34.880
Do y'all know how organized I am financially?
00:24:35.119 --> 00:24:38.640
He fixed everything for me, and now I understand it.
00:24:38.960 --> 00:24:44.000
He shamed me a tiny bit and was like, Why would you spend$455 at Sephora?
00:24:44.160 --> 00:24:48.799
And I'm like, now's not the time to actually know why?
00:24:49.759 --> 00:24:50.960
Look at my skin.
00:24:51.119 --> 00:24:52.240
Like, what are you gonna do?
00:24:52.480 --> 00:25:00.400
I actually would love for everyone to know that it's it is a little about how good her skin looks, but it's also the fact that she has a tween.
00:25:01.279 --> 00:25:14.319
Oh my god, and okay, anyways, point being creative use, not for me, but holy moly, I rescued myself and I was like, I see it was like all these little light bulb bulbs.
00:25:14.400 --> 00:25:20.160
So if you heard Lindsay talking about finances and you're like, oh my gosh, I'm so scared, I was you.
00:25:20.400 --> 00:25:28.960
Yes, I will say there is a lot of really great optimization that can happen with AI if you're using it appropriately.
00:25:29.119 --> 00:25:29.839
It's amazing.
00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:31.680
It is amazing, it is amazing.
00:25:33.359 --> 00:25:37.440
So I'll leave y'all with this from like the therapy perspective.
00:25:37.680 --> 00:25:47.599
If you're in comparison, overachievement, or rescue me, optimization is not going to do what you think it is going to do.
00:25:47.759 --> 00:25:52.559
It's like the lie we tell ourselves that this notebook is the one that's gonna change my life.
00:25:52.799 --> 00:25:53.519
It is not.
00:25:53.759 --> 00:26:00.640
That's actually a lie she tells herself, but yes, like constantly, and I still do it, and I still love it, and the right pens.
00:26:00.880 --> 00:26:02.799
Like I it's just who I am, okay.
00:26:03.200 --> 00:26:09.680
Um, and then I think making these conscious choices turn into empowerment.
00:26:09.759 --> 00:26:14.880
And I think what you said, Laura, is like, well, and will with one more, which I think is awesome.
00:26:15.119 --> 00:26:19.039
I get to choose how I spend my time with the people that I want to be with, and I love that.
00:26:19.279 --> 00:26:21.920
Optimize so that you can get to the good stuff in your life.
00:26:22.000 --> 00:26:25.680
And like maybe do the research on creatine is pretty amazing.
00:26:25.839 --> 00:26:28.240
All right, well, let's just stick with the water.
00:26:29.119 --> 00:26:29.599
Bye.
00:26:29.759 --> 00:26:30.880
Bye, guys.
00:26:33.680 --> 00:26:39.519
Before you cut bangs is hosted by Lara Quick and Claire Fearman and produced by Will Lockmane.
00:26:39.599 --> 00:26:41.200
Follow along with us everywhere.
00:26:41.359 --> 00:26:43.119
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00:26:57.039 --> 00:27:02.400
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00:27:04.720 --> 00:27:07.759
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00:27:07.920 --> 00:27:10.640
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00:27:10.880 --> 00:27:15.920
So, whether you're in the state of Alabama or not, I want to be able to help direct you to the right resources.
00:27:16.079 --> 00:27:18.160
Goodgrowthwithclaire.com.