ABOUT THIS EPISODE
You may know this scene: your kid forgot practice gear again, an assignment vanished into the void, and you're wondering if your teen is just disorganized — or is there something more serious going on?
That mix of exhaustion and frustration is real. Chasing lost details, worrying that you may have dropped the ball, wondering if you're overreacting to normal middle school or high school organization struggles, or missing something bigger — you're allowed to feel all of that without it meaning you're failing anyone.
Here's some good news: the part of the brain that handles executive functioning is still under construction all through high school and doesn't fully come online until your kid reaches their mid-20s. So a teen who can't stay organized, forgets homework, or misses details isn't revealing a character flaw. It's a work-in-progress brain doing exactly what a work-in-progress brain does.
Today's guest, Dr. Tori Cordiano, walks us through how to lower the bar on what counts as "normal," and build a few sturdy tools for executive function instead of expecting your teen to self-manage it all. She talks through how to let natural consequences do some of the teaching, and how tying responsibilities to what your teen actually cares about is often more motivating than punishment ever is.
Stay curious, and know there's a clear sign for when consistent struggles and concerning school feedback it's worth pursuing an evaluation. You've got more room here than you think.
Dr. Lisa Damour is a clinical psychologist, New York Times bestselling author, and globally recognized expert on adolescent development who partners with UNICEF to support parents worldwide. Dr. Tori Cordiano is a licensed clinical psychologist, speaker, and writer specializing in child and adolescent development. In her private practice, she provides comprehensive evaluations, parent consultation, and psychotherapy, alongside a virtual course for parents on executive functioning and a regular newsletter. Dr. Cordiano also serves as a consulting psychologist and Co-Director of the Center for Research for Girls at Laurel School.
Dr. Cordiano’s executive functioning course for parents, consultation services, and professional speaking: drtoricordiano.com
The Time Timer: https://www.timetimer.com/
________________
Parenting a tween or teen? Buckle up. Ask Lisa: Untangling Family Life tackles the questions that keep parents up at night — academics, friendships, mental health, screens, meltdowns, and more.
Every week, psychologist Lisa Damour teams up with a different expert to answer a real parent's real question — no fluff, no judgment, just practical, evidence-based advice you can actually use. Dr. Damour and her colleagues also turn their attention to the emotional rollercoaster of raising kids — the moments that leave you feeling uneasy, overwhelmed, or just plain alone.
You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to hit play.
________________
Today's sponsors:
Jones Road Beauty: Use the code ASKLISA for a free full sized Mascara with your first purchase at https://www.jonesroadbeauty.com.
Momentous: Get up to 35% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at https://
Shopify: Sign up for your free trial today at https://www.shopify.com/asklisa
Skylight: Get $30 off your 15-inch calendar a www://www.MySkylight.com/ASKLISA
________________
disorganized teen, teen executive functioning, executive functioning help for teens, ADHD vs normal teen behavior, is my teen disorganized or ADHD, 9th grader struggling in school, teen can’t stay organized, help my teen remember homework, teen time management tips, tools for teen executive function, visual timer for kids, phone alarms for homework, Sunday planning routine for families, supporting ADHD in high school, natural consequences for teens, motivating unmotivated teen, tween organization skills, middle school executive function, high school organization skills
ask lisa podcast, lisa damour, dr lisa damour, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting help, family dynamics, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence, emotional lives of parents, parent wellbeing, parental mental health, parenting stress, parent self-care, parent burnout, parenting emotions, lisa damour book, the emotional lives of parents, parenting experts, child psychologist, parenting research, evidence-based parenting, voicing change media
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
