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Welcome to Stories from the Lost and Found.
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I'm Krishna Avalon, subconscious therapist, breakthrough coach, and acupuncturist, someone who spent 24 years helping people change from the inside out.
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I bridge neuroscience and ancient medicine together to show you what's actually driving your life because it's almost never what's on the surface.
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Each week we'll go deep into the patterns, wounded parts, and the real stories behind why we get stuck and how we find our way through.
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If you're ready for honesty, depth, and tools that actually work, you're in the right place.
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I am so glad you're here.
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This is such an important topic that I am very excited, very respectful of bringing to your awareness.
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It's about your chronic pain.
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And I want to ask you what if your pain is a protector, part of your system, not an enemy?
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You've done everything you were supposed to do: the blood work, the imaging, the MRI, the scans, the specialists, the other specialists.
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You've kept the appointments, filled out the forms, and described pain in as much detail as you could.
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And the results come back.
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Everything looks normal, or we don't see anything wrong.
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You get a shrug, a referral to someone else, or a suggestion that it might be stress.
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But then nothing.
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No explanation, no plan, no one who can tell you why your body hurts.
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And I see this so often in the people who find me.
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So you walk out of your office with pain that's very real and an answer that says it isn't.
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Maybe you've started to wonder if you're making too much of it.
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Maybe you've started to see your body as the problem, something to manage, push through, override, or get away from.
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I want to say something first.
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You are not imagining it.
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Your pain is very, very real.
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And the fact that no test can explain it doesn't mean nothing's happening.
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It means we may be looking in the wrong place without the right frameworks of inquiry.
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Labs and scans are good at measuring structure and chemistry.
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They're not designed to measure what your nervous system is carrying or the old wounding that your body stores.
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They can't show you the bracing or the held breath, the tightening that starts somewhere small and spreads, as if your body's getting ready for something before your mind is caught up.
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In my 24 years of practice, here's what I've seen over and over.
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When someone has been through every test and been told there's nothing wrong, pain is often connected to unresolved trauma.
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And the pain itself is often a protector.
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It is a part of your system with a very important job.
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And that's what we're going to talk about today.
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What's running underneath chronic pain in the subconscious part of your mind, and how internal family systems framework helps us understand pain as a part of you, trying to give you information.
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It is not an enemy.
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So before we go further, I want to be clear about one thing.
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Everything today is meant to sit alongside your medical care, not replace it.
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Keep your doctors, keep your specialists, keep getting evaluated, rule out what needs ruling out.
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And I want to offer an additional way of perceiving it.
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When something overwhelming happens, especially when we're young, the nervous system does whatever it can to survive.
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If the experience can't be felt, expressed, or resolved in the moment, it doesn't disappear, it gets stored in your body, in the muscles, the fascia, the breath, becomes a baseline for your nervous system to set alerts, to keep you awake, aware, ready.
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Years later, the original event may be long past, but the body's still braced for it.
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The nervous system that has been on guard for decades can become more and more sensitive until it sends pain signals in response to things that aren't actually dangerous.
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And that's one reason the tests come back normal.
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There may be nothing structurally broken.
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The body may be holding an old wound that needs attention.
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And your body isn't betraying you again, it's giving you information.
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These are the subconscious programs that are often the ones creating your experience.
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They are underneath your awareness most often.
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So as I say these, notice which ones land in your body, which ones feel true for you.
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And your truth will often be a felt sense in your body.
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So this is a practice as well.
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The first one is my body is not safe.
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If the body was where the hurt happened, the subconscious learns to treat it as a place of threat.
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So you live slightly outside it in your head, watching it, bracing against it.
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A body you can't feel safe in is a body that stays on guard.
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The next one is it's not safe to feel what's in here.
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Somewhere along the way, feeling became dangerous.
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Maybe the feelings were too big for you or the people around you.
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And so your system learned to hold them in the tissue.
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Instead of letting them go, then move through the heart.
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The body keeps the tension so the mind doesn't have to meet the feeling.
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The next one is my body is the enemy.
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And again, these are beliefs beneath awareness.
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We often don't realize that this is the program.
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This is what we believe because of our experiences.
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My body is the enemy.
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This is the program that builds after years of pain, and especially after years of being told nothing's wrong.
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Maybe your body's physical boundaries were violated at one point, and the pain is the proof that the wound has not yet been resolved.
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You fight your body and resent it and try to override it.
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And the fight itself keeps the nervous system in alarm, which can keep the pain going.
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The next one is I can't trust my body.
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And you don't know when it will flare, what it will do, or whether it will let you down, so you stop listening to it.
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And the more you disconnect, the louder the pain has to be to get your attention.
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None of these were chosen.
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They were conclusions drawn by a young nervous system, a young part of you trying to survive, just doing its best.
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Please let that land.
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Sometimes there was a clear trauma, an injury, a loss, an accident, something frightening or violating.
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Sometimes it was an environment, maybe a home that was tense and unpredictable, critical or unsafe emotionally.
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A child who had to stay quiet, stay still, stay on guard, hold it all in.
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Just take a deep breath.
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And sometimes there's no single event you can point to.
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That's common too.
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The body keeps the cumulative record, not just the headlines, not just the big traumatic events.
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Remember that chronic stress can also be traumatic, just long-term stress, long-term embracing.
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In internal family systems, we understand the psyche as part of a system.
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Each part of you has a role and a protective intention.
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In my experience, in many people, pain functions as what we call a protector part.
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And that does not make it imaginary.
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It's very, very real.
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This part of you, the pain, it's doing an important job.
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And some of the jobs I see are these.
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The pain keeps you still, so you don't have to move forward into something that feels unsafe.
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The pain keeps your attention on the body so you don't have to feel what's underneath.
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It stops you from overdoing it because part of you learn that pushing leads to collapse, or it carries the weight of what was never expressed, so the rest of the system can keep functioning.
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Underneath that protector is an exile, a younger part carrying the original wound, a child who was hurt, frightened, or alone with something too big.
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She is the one the pain may be shielding.
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The protector exists, so she never has to feel it again.
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This is why fighting the pain can backfire.
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When you treat a protector as an enemy, it tends to dig in.
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And when you meet it with curiosity, something different happens.
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And here's what the pain has never been shown.
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Self.
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This is what we call it in IFS.
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Self with a capital S.
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This is the calm, grounded, compassionate, present, loving, playful, wise part of you that is your core, your true energy.
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A part of you that can be with the body, which is holding all this pain without getting overwhelmed.
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When the protector senses self is truly here, it begins to soften.
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Not because it's been forced or ignored, but because it no longer has to carry this alone.
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And then the younger part underneath can finally be met and told what she's never heard.
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It's over.
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You're safe now.
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I'm here with you.
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Internal family systems creates this relationship.
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It lets the protector soften and lets the exile be witnessed.
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But the beliefs themselves were encoded neurologically in the part of the brain that runs automatically beneath reasoning.
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And you can't think your way out of them.
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Can't talk your body into trusting itself.
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It creates what's called a whole brain state in which the subconscious becomes more receptive to something new, new programming, new beliefs, new imprints.
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It can update old patterns.
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It can help you from those painful memories go in a new direction in your brain and move on.
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And here's what I've noticed about pain.
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So much of the work isn't removing something, it's expanding something, widening what the subconscious believes is possible between you and your body.
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So in this whole brain state, we can create new beliefs deep in the subconscious level.
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And again, the subconscious creates 95% of your life according to the neuroscience.
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What if your program was, I love and appreciate my body?
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I connect to the high intelligence of my body.
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I trust my body's inherent wisdom.
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It's safe for me to feel what my body is holding.
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Each one of these speaks to something we name today.
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Loving and appreciating the body answers the enemy program.
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Connecting to its intelligence turns the body from a problem into a source of information.
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Trusting its wisdom replaces the bracing with the listening, and being safe to feel loosens the old rule that feeling is dangerous.
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In ordinary waking consciousness, those statements can feel strange, even false, if you've been in pain for so many years.
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Of course they do.
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The subconscious is still running the opposite.
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And that's not a failure for you.
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You just haven't had the right tools yet.
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That's why repeating these things, these programs we want to believe, the beliefs we want to believe, repeating them in the mirror doesn't work.
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Mantras haven't worked, journaling hasn't worked.
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In a whole brain state, which we get to in Psych K, the old program can be updated where it was written rather than through the thinking mind.
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Because so far you haven't been able to think, talk, or mindset your way out of this pain.
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And that's why I made this episode for you.
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What people tend to notice is gradual, a little more softness in the body, less bracing before the flare, a shift from fighting the body to listening to it.
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And for many, the pain changes.
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For some, it eases significantly, and almost always the relationship with the body becomes less like a battle.
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I won't promise any outcome, but what I will say is that a body that feels safe, witnessed, validated, appreciated, and heard is a body that no longer has to shout.
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I will also say that this framework, these two frameworks, are often the missing pieces of people's healing journey.
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I've seen countless people show up here when nothing else has worked.
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And with these ways of inquiring within and updating on programs, people finally have different experiences.
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And those parts of you that have been begging for your attention, they feel held.
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They no longer feel alone, they feel seen.
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So if you've been told there's nothing wrong, I hope you hear this.
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Something in you has been trying to tell you something, and it deserves to be heard.
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Chronic pain isn't a sign that you're broken or exaggerating.
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In my experience, it's often a sign that something in you has been carrying a lot for a long time with no one to help.
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The pain may be a protector doing her best to keep you safe.
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The body may be holding a story it never got to finish telling.
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But you aren't meant to carry this along forever.
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When the part underneath is met and the program updates, when trust between you and your body is built, where the distrust was installed, things shift.
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The body stops being the thing you fight and becomes the thing that you trust and love.
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So let's close this practice, this information with an integration to practice being with the part of you that showed up to listen to this today.
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So let's take a couple breaths, close your eyes if it feels good.
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In internal family systems, we are always slowing it down.
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Sometimes that anxiety or the distractor parts, those are protectors as well.
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Trying to keep you from feeling what's in your body.
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Keep you from being present.
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And I'm right here with you, taking slow deep breaths, just inviting you inward.
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Start to notice any pain within you.
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Sometimes those are thoughts, feelings, sensations.
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While there might be a few different parts showing up, take a couple of breaths into your heart to grow the feeling of presence and curiosity in your heart.
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Your curiosity for being here, your curiosity to understand the pain.
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Choose one part of you that feels this pain.
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Presence and the curiosity on your breath.
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Practice extending this presence, this curiosity, openness towards the part of you that's in pain.
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That's it.
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Take a couple deep breaths.
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And when I say that's it, I mean there is no other agenda in IFS except slowing down and building this presence, this curiosity, extending it toward a part of you that's really needing your attention.
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And any other parts that are present right now, you can ask them, like, hello, I see you.
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Would it be okay if you gave me a little bit of space to get to know this pain a little bit?
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It's like acknowledging all the parts of your system, letting them know that you see them.
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They love it when they are seen and ask permission.
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All right, and then extend that presence in your breath, curiosity, openness towards the part of you in pain.
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And if nothing else, doing this, extending your presence to this part of you, huge practice.
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No small thing.
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You're essentially letting this part of know that you this part of you know that you are here with it.
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And you see it.
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And then ask it, but is it okay if I hang out with you right now and get to know you a little bit?
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Extending so much care and presence to your system as you listen to this.
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I know this is a big deal.
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It might be seemingly simple, but it's very powerful.
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To breathe, to slow down with your heart and presence, and extend that to a part of you that has been holding so much.
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This is your practice.
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An internal family systems, the entire framework is about getting the parts of you in relationship with your self energy, letting them know they're not alone and that you see them right here with them.
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I also want to honor and validate that we might have parts that are in conflict with each other, like trying to get in the way, or you know, a part of us that might be really frustrated or angry at the pain.
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So valid, so real.
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And that part too is a protector.
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Right now, in this moment, if that is present for you, validate the shit out of that part and be like, I understand and I hear you.
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And I want to get to know you as well.
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At this moment, would it be okay if you gave me a little space right now to just turn the dial down?
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Would that be okay to turn the intensity down like 25% so I can sit and be with this pain?
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Often it's a yes, and you feel that in your body, or you just get it somewhere, like yes.
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And if not, it's oh it's okay.
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This is where having somebody hold space for you, like a practitioner, comes in really handy and supportive, because the practitioner you should choose, you should feel connected and safe with.
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And they will have a lot of self-energy to reflect to your system and to all these parts of you.
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And even if you don't have much self-energy available in your own system, the practitioner will speak directly to these parts of you until you have enough self-energy available.
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Just want to name you're not doing anything wrong.
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This is a huge practice, huge, powerful, yet simple.
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Let's go back to the breath, breathing into your heart, slowing it down, to presence, openness, curiosity, any of that that's available, extending it to the pain.
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Okay, and this is huge.
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This is enough of a practice, but I really invite you to stay here because the next steps are also powerful.
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But we would go into asking what this part of you would like you to know, asking if it's anything that it wants to show you, holding space as your practitioner for these other parts that might be present.
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And not this is this is a lot that can be going on, but for now breathing, practicing presence and slowing it down, bringing that openness into your heart and extending that to your chronic pain, the parts of your body hurting so deeply for the wounds that they carry.
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And again, I just want to honor the other parts of you that might be alive in your system that are giving you any kind of space whatsoever to listen and inquire with the pain.
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And this is your practice.
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Look to this several times a day, even if you just have a few breaths with practicing presence, slowing it down.
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Any curiosity you can extend to the pain.
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Like, what do you need right now?
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I'm here with you.
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You might have to practice listening for the answer because parts don't always give us information right away, or other parts might want to get in there to chime in.
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But it's a practice.
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There are other solo episodes that you probably relate to as well, where we're cultivating self-energy, speaking to the parts of you that need your attention.
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Not trying to dismiss or ignore or make them go away.
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And it might be that the distraction or the anger or the frustration that might need more attention before we can access the chronic pain, because the chronic pain can be a protector, but it can also be an exile.
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And the exile is the deeper wound, but often hiding.
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But often hiding beneath the pain.
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So take a couple breaths, okay?
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Slow it down.
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I'm so so grateful for you to practice this.
00:21:43.440 --> 00:21:47.440
I've really seen this be the work that your system and the part of you need.
00:21:47.759 --> 00:21:51.920
So come back to this over and over again.
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Building that connection of self-energy to part.
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The more this part of you gets to know that you actually here and it's in your self-energy and it's not alone, that's when things start to shift.
00:22:06.880 --> 00:22:10.000
You're building trust so that these parts of you feel safe.
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I want you to know that that self-energy is always within you.
00:22:14.079 --> 00:22:14.559
Always.
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But the parts of you might be bigger and more extreme.
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That's when self-energy can be hard to access.
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But honestly, in my experience, at least in my sessions with people, that self-energy, if it's not right there, big, open, loving, caring, compassionate wise, it doesn't take long before it's available.
00:22:36.400 --> 00:22:38.799
So do not believe there's anything wrong with you.
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If the self-energy is a little hard to access with chronic pain, take a couple deep breaths.
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Just know my many, many years of experience, we're all just needing the right tool.
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There's nothing wrong with you.
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So much love.
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Hope this lands, and I will see you in the next episode.
00:23:06.400 --> 00:23:10.400
That's a wrap on today's episode of Stories from the Lost and Found.
00:23:10.559 --> 00:23:13.759
If something here resonated with you, the best thing you can do is share it.
00:23:13.920 --> 00:23:15.839
Send this to someone who really needs to hear it.
00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:19.200
And if you are ready to go deeper, I would love to support you.
00:23:19.359 --> 00:23:20.640
Download my free workbook.
00:23:20.799 --> 00:23:23.200
It walks you through your own subconscious blocks.
00:23:23.359 --> 00:23:25.039
You can find that link in the show notes.
00:23:25.119 --> 00:23:31.599
Or if you're ready for a real shift, book a free strategy call and let's figure out what is keeping you from moving forward.
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I'll see you next week.
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Your next breakthrough is closer than you think.
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Welcome to Stories from the Lost and Found.
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I'm Krishna Avalon, subconscious therapist, breakthrough coach, and acupuncturist, someone who spent 24 years helping people change from the inside out.
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I bridge neuroscience and ancient medicine together to show you what's actually driving your life because it's almost never what's on the surface.
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Each week we'll go deep into the patterns, wounded parts, and the real stories behind why we get stuck and how we find our way through.
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If you're ready for honesty, depth, and tools that actually work, you're in the right place.
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I am so glad you're here.
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This is such an important topic that I am very excited, very respectful of bringing to your awareness.
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It's about your chronic pain.
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And I want to ask you what if your pain is a protector, part of your system, not an enemy?
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You've done everything you were supposed to do: the blood work, the imaging, the MRI, the scans, the specialists, the other specialists.
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You've kept the appointments, filled out the forms, and described pain in as much detail as you could.
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And the results come back.
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Everything looks normal, or we don't see anything wrong.
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You get a shrug, a referral to someone else, or a suggestion that it might be stress.
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But then nothing.
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No explanation, no plan, no one who can tell you why your body hurts.
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And I see this so often in the people who find me.
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So you walk out of your office with pain that's very real and an answer that says it isn't.
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Maybe you've started to wonder if you're making too much of it.
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Maybe you've started to see your body as the problem, something to manage, push through, override, or get away from.
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I want to say something first.
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You are not imagining it.
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Your pain is very, very real.
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And the fact that no test can explain it doesn't mean nothing's happening.
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It means we may be looking in the wrong place without the right frameworks of inquiry.
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Labs and scans are good at measuring structure and chemistry.
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They're not designed to measure what your nervous system is carrying or the old wounding that your body stores.
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They can't show you the bracing or the held breath, the tightening that starts somewhere small and spreads, as if your body's getting ready for something before your mind is caught up.
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In my 24 years of practice, here's what I've seen over and over.
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When someone has been through every test and been told there's nothing wrong, pain is often connected to unresolved trauma.
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And the pain itself is often a protector.
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It is a part of your system with a very important job.
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And that's what we're going to talk about today.
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What's running underneath chronic pain in the subconscious part of your mind, and how internal family systems framework helps us understand pain as a part of you, trying to give you information.
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It is not an enemy.
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So before we go further, I want to be clear about one thing.
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Everything today is meant to sit alongside your medical care, not replace it.
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Keep your doctors, keep your specialists, keep getting evaluated, rule out what needs ruling out.
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And I want to offer an additional way of perceiving it.
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When something overwhelming happens, especially when we're young, the nervous system does whatever it can to survive.
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If the experience can't be felt, expressed, or resolved in the moment, it doesn't disappear, it gets stored in your body, in the muscles, the fascia, the breath, becomes a baseline for your nervous system to set alerts, to keep you awake, aware, ready.
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Years later, the original event may be long past, but the body's still braced for it.
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The nervous system that has been on guard for decades can become more and more sensitive until it sends pain signals in response to things that aren't actually dangerous.
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And that's one reason the tests come back normal.
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There may be nothing structurally broken.
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The body may be holding an old wound that needs attention.
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And your body isn't betraying you again, it's giving you information.
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These are the subconscious programs that are often the ones creating your experience.
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They are underneath your awareness most often.
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So as I say these, notice which ones land in your body, which ones feel true for you.
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And your truth will often be a felt sense in your body.
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So this is a practice as well.
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The first one is my body is not safe.
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If the body was where the hurt happened, the subconscious learns to treat it as a place of threat.
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So you live slightly outside it in your head, watching it, bracing against it.
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A body you can't feel safe in is a body that stays on guard.
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The next one is it's not safe to feel what's in here.
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Somewhere along the way, feeling became dangerous.
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Maybe the feelings were too big for you or the people around you.
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And so your system learned to hold them in the tissue.
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Instead of letting them go, then move through the heart.
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The body keeps the tension so the mind doesn't have to meet the feeling.
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The next one is my body is the enemy.
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And again, these are beliefs beneath awareness.
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We often don't realize that this is the program.
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This is what we believe because of our experiences.
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My body is the enemy.
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This is the program that builds after years of pain, and especially after years of being told nothing's wrong.
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Maybe your body's physical boundaries were violated at one point, and the pain is the proof that the wound has not yet been resolved.
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You fight your body and resent it and try to override it.
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And the fight itself keeps the nervous system in alarm, which can keep the pain going.
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The next one is I can't trust my body.
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And you don't know when it will flare, what it will do, or whether it will let you down, so you stop listening to it.
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And the more you disconnect, the louder the pain has to be to get your attention.
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None of these were chosen.
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They were conclusions drawn by a young nervous system, a young part of you trying to survive, just doing its best.
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Please let that land.
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Sometimes there was a clear trauma, an injury, a loss, an accident, something frightening or violating.
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Sometimes it was an environment, maybe a home that was tense and unpredictable, critical or unsafe emotionally.
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A child who had to stay quiet, stay still, stay on guard, hold it all in.
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Just take a deep breath.
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And sometimes there's no single event you can point to.
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That's common too.
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The body keeps the cumulative record, not just the headlines, not just the big traumatic events.
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Remember that chronic stress can also be traumatic, just long-term stress, long-term embracing.
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In internal family systems, we understand the psyche as part of a system.
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Each part of you has a role and a protective intention.
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In my experience, in many people, pain functions as what we call a protector part.
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And that does not make it imaginary.
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It's very, very real.
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This part of you, the pain, it's doing an important job.
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And some of the jobs I see are these.
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The pain keeps you still, so you don't have to move forward into something that feels unsafe.
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The pain keeps your attention on the body so you don't have to feel what's underneath.
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It stops you from overdoing it because part of you learn that pushing leads to collapse, or it carries the weight of what was never expressed, so the rest of the system can keep functioning.
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Underneath that protector is an exile, a younger part carrying the original wound, a child who was hurt, frightened, or alone with something too big.
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She is the one the pain may be shielding.
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The protector exists, so she never has to feel it again.
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This is why fighting the pain can backfire.
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When you treat a protector as an enemy, it tends to dig in.
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And when you meet it with curiosity, something different happens.
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And here's what the pain has never been shown.
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Self.
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This is what we call it in IFS.
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Self with a capital S.
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This is the calm, grounded, compassionate, present, loving, playful, wise part of you that is your core, your true energy.
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A part of you that can be with the body, which is holding all this pain without getting overwhelmed.
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When the protector senses self is truly here, it begins to soften.
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Not because it's been forced or ignored, but because it no longer has to carry this alone.
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And then the younger part underneath can finally be met and told what she's never heard.
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It's over.
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You're safe now.
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I'm here with you.
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Internal family systems creates this relationship.
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It lets the protector soften and lets the exile be witnessed.
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But the beliefs themselves were encoded neurologically in the part of the brain that runs automatically beneath reasoning.
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And you can't think your way out of them.
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Can't talk your body into trusting itself.
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It creates what's called a whole brain state in which the subconscious becomes more receptive to something new, new programming, new beliefs, new imprints.
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It can update old patterns.
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It can help you from those painful memories go in a new direction in your brain and move on.
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And here's what I've noticed about pain.
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So much of the work isn't removing something, it's expanding something, widening what the subconscious believes is possible between you and your body.
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So in this whole brain state, we can create new beliefs deep in the subconscious level.
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And again, the subconscious creates 95% of your life according to the neuroscience.
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What if your program was, I love and appreciate my body?
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I connect to the high intelligence of my body.
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I trust my body's inherent wisdom.
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It's safe for me to feel what my body is holding.
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Each one of these speaks to something we name today.
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Loving and appreciating the body answers the enemy program.
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Connecting to its intelligence turns the body from a problem into a source of information.
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Trusting its wisdom replaces the bracing with the listening, and being safe to feel loosens the old rule that feeling is dangerous.
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In ordinary waking consciousness, those statements can feel strange, even false, if you've been in pain for so many years.
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Of course they do.
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The subconscious is still running the opposite.
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And that's not a failure for you.
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You just haven't had the right tools yet.
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That's why repeating these things, these programs we want to believe, the beliefs we want to believe, repeating them in the mirror doesn't work.
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Mantras haven't worked, journaling hasn't worked.
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In a whole brain state, which we get to in Psych K, the old program can be updated where it was written rather than through the thinking mind.
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Because so far you haven't been able to think, talk, or mindset your way out of this pain.
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And that's why I made this episode for you.
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What people tend to notice is gradual, a little more softness in the body, less bracing before the flare, a shift from fighting the body to listening to it.
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And for many, the pain changes.
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For some, it eases significantly, and almost always the relationship with the body becomes less like a battle.
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I won't promise any outcome, but what I will say is that a body that feels safe, witnessed, validated, appreciated, and heard is a body that no longer has to shout.
00:12:44.399 --> 00:12:55.919
I will also say that this framework, these two frameworks, are often the missing pieces of people's healing journey.
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I've seen countless people show up here when nothing else has worked.
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And with these ways of inquiring within and updating on programs, people finally have different experiences.
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And those parts of you that have been begging for your attention, they feel held.
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They no longer feel alone, they feel seen.
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So if you've been told there's nothing wrong, I hope you hear this.
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Something in you has been trying to tell you something, and it deserves to be heard.
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Chronic pain isn't a sign that you're broken or exaggerating.
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In my experience, it's often a sign that something in you has been carrying a lot for a long time with no one to help.
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The pain may be a protector doing her best to keep you safe.
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The body may be holding a story it never got to finish telling.
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But you aren't meant to carry this along forever.
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When the part underneath is met and the program updates, when trust between you and your body is built, where the distrust was installed, things shift.
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The body stops being the thing you fight and becomes the thing that you trust and love.
00:14:03.840 --> 00:14:18.080
So let's close this practice, this information with an integration to practice being with the part of you that showed up to listen to this today.
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So let's take a couple breaths, close your eyes if it feels good.
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In internal family systems, we are always slowing it down.
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Sometimes that anxiety or the distractor parts, those are protectors as well.
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Trying to keep you from feeling what's in your body.
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Keep you from being present.
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And I'm right here with you, taking slow deep breaths, just inviting you inward.
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Start to notice any pain within you.
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Sometimes those are thoughts, feelings, sensations.
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While there might be a few different parts showing up, take a couple of breaths into your heart to grow the feeling of presence and curiosity in your heart.
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Your curiosity for being here, your curiosity to understand the pain.
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Choose one part of you that feels this pain.
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Presence and the curiosity on your breath.
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Practice extending this presence, this curiosity, openness towards the part of you that's in pain.
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That's it.
00:15:21.360 --> 00:15:23.519
Take a couple deep breaths.
00:15:23.919 --> 00:15:38.399
And when I say that's it, I mean there is no other agenda in IFS except slowing down and building this presence, this curiosity, extending it toward a part of you that's really needing your attention.
00:15:38.559 --> 00:15:45.279
And any other parts that are present right now, you can ask them, like, hello, I see you.
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Would it be okay if you gave me a little bit of space to get to know this pain a little bit?
00:15:53.759 --> 00:15:59.600
It's like acknowledging all the parts of your system, letting them know that you see them.
00:15:59.759 --> 00:16:03.919
They love it when they are seen and ask permission.
00:16:04.080 --> 00:16:12.639
All right, and then extend that presence in your breath, curiosity, openness towards the part of you in pain.
00:16:12.799 --> 00:16:20.080
And if nothing else, doing this, extending your presence to this part of you, huge practice.
00:16:20.399 --> 00:16:21.279
No small thing.
00:16:21.440 --> 00:16:26.960
You're essentially letting this part of know that you this part of you know that you are here with it.
00:16:28.159 --> 00:16:29.120
And you see it.
00:16:29.440 --> 00:16:35.440
And then ask it, but is it okay if I hang out with you right now and get to know you a little bit?
00:16:35.759 --> 00:16:40.879
Extending so much care and presence to your system as you listen to this.
00:16:43.279 --> 00:16:45.279
I know this is a big deal.
00:16:46.879 --> 00:16:50.080
It might be seemingly simple, but it's very powerful.
00:16:51.039 --> 00:17:00.559
To breathe, to slow down with your heart and presence, and extend that to a part of you that has been holding so much.
00:17:01.440 --> 00:17:03.039
This is your practice.
00:17:04.000 --> 00:17:16.720
An internal family systems, the entire framework is about getting the parts of you in relationship with your self energy, letting them know they're not alone and that you see them right here with them.
00:17:16.880 --> 00:17:29.599
I also want to honor and validate that we might have parts that are in conflict with each other, like trying to get in the way, or you know, a part of us that might be really frustrated or angry at the pain.
00:17:32.079 --> 00:17:34.720
So valid, so real.
00:17:35.279 --> 00:17:37.599
And that part too is a protector.
00:17:37.839 --> 00:17:47.279
Right now, in this moment, if that is present for you, validate the shit out of that part and be like, I understand and I hear you.
00:17:48.240 --> 00:17:50.720
And I want to get to know you as well.
00:17:52.400 --> 00:17:58.079
At this moment, would it be okay if you gave me a little space right now to just turn the dial down?
00:17:58.160 --> 00:18:06.400
Would that be okay to turn the intensity down like 25% so I can sit and be with this pain?
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Often it's a yes, and you feel that in your body, or you just get it somewhere, like yes.
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And if not, it's oh it's okay.
00:18:18.799 --> 00:18:31.279
This is where having somebody hold space for you, like a practitioner, comes in really handy and supportive, because the practitioner you should choose, you should feel connected and safe with.
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And they will have a lot of self-energy to reflect to your system and to all these parts of you.
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And even if you don't have much self-energy available in your own system, the practitioner will speak directly to these parts of you until you have enough self-energy available.
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Just want to name you're not doing anything wrong.
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This is a huge practice, huge, powerful, yet simple.
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Let's go back to the breath, breathing into your heart, slowing it down, to presence, openness, curiosity, any of that that's available, extending it to the pain.
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Okay, and this is huge.
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This is enough of a practice, but I really invite you to stay here because the next steps are also powerful.
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But we would go into asking what this part of you would like you to know, asking if it's anything that it wants to show you, holding space as your practitioner for these other parts that might be present.
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And not this is this is a lot that can be going on, but for now breathing, practicing presence and slowing it down, bringing that openness into your heart and extending that to your chronic pain, the parts of your body hurting so deeply for the wounds that they carry.
00:20:01.359 --> 00:20:13.920
And again, I just want to honor the other parts of you that might be alive in your system that are giving you any kind of space whatsoever to listen and inquire with the pain.
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And this is your practice.
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Look to this several times a day, even if you just have a few breaths with practicing presence, slowing it down.
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Any curiosity you can extend to the pain.
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Like, what do you need right now?
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I'm here with you.
00:20:35.839 --> 00:20:45.359
You might have to practice listening for the answer because parts don't always give us information right away, or other parts might want to get in there to chime in.
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But it's a practice.
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There are other solo episodes that you probably relate to as well, where we're cultivating self-energy, speaking to the parts of you that need your attention.
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Not trying to dismiss or ignore or make them go away.
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And it might be that the distraction or the anger or the frustration that might need more attention before we can access the chronic pain, because the chronic pain can be a protector, but it can also be an exile.
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And the exile is the deeper wound, but often hiding.
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But often hiding beneath the pain.
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So take a couple breaths, okay?
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Slow it down.
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I'm so so grateful for you to practice this.
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I've really seen this be the work that your system and the part of you need.
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So come back to this over and over again.
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Building that connection of self-energy to part.
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The more this part of you gets to know that you actually here and it's in your self-energy and it's not alone, that's when things start to shift.
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You're building trust so that these parts of you feel safe.
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I want you to know that that self-energy is always within you.
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Always.
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But the parts of you might be bigger and more extreme.
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That's when self-energy can be hard to access.
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But honestly, in my experience, at least in my sessions with people, that self-energy, if it's not right there, big, open, loving, caring, compassionate wise, it doesn't take long before it's available.
00:22:36.400 --> 00:22:38.799
So do not believe there's anything wrong with you.
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If the self-energy is a little hard to access with chronic pain, take a couple deep breaths.
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Just know my many, many years of experience, we're all just needing the right tool.
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There's nothing wrong with you.
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So much love.
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Hope this lands, and I will see you in the next episode.
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That's a wrap on today's episode of Stories from the Lost and Found.
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If something here resonated with you, the best thing you can do is share it.
00:23:13.920 --> 00:23:15.839
Send this to someone who really needs to hear it.
00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:19.200
And if you are ready to go deeper, I would love to support you.
00:23:19.359 --> 00:23:20.640
Download my free workbook.
00:23:20.799 --> 00:23:23.200
It walks you through your own subconscious blocks.
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You can find that link in the show notes.
00:23:25.119 --> 00:23:31.599
Or if you're ready for a real shift, book a free strategy call and let's figure out what is keeping you from moving forward.
00:23:31.759 --> 00:23:32.880
I'll see you next week.
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Your next breakthrough is closer than you think.
