Finding Calm During Life’s Hardest Diagnosis - Talk and Meditaion

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Hi, thank you so much for joining me today.
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I'm Shannon, and this is Starseed Evolution, bringing the wisdom and insight of the cosmos to you.
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I'm grateful that you're listening.
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Welcome.
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This is Chris Collins, narrating on behalf of my friend, Shannon Sullivan.
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Since November of 2025, Shannon has been bravely facing one of the most difficult hardships life can offer.
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Stage 4 brain cancer.
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Through it all, she has done what she always does, living life with love, hope, and goodness.
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She has not once forgotten about her community here, and while she cannot record and edit her own meditation right now, she has written many words of wisdom to share.
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This recording will have several sections.
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In a moment, I will begin with a poem chosen by Shannon.
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Then I will read a short talk about Buddha prepared by Shannon.
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Following that, you will hear Shannon's words about her inspiring and challenging story along with some of the lessons and wisdom she can share.
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Finally, we will conclude with a beautiful guided meditation practice that Shannon has written.
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Let it relax you, inspire you, guide you, and help you through your own challenges.
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Please listen along as I share Shannon's wisdom, experience, and teachings.
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Let's begin.
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The Color of Hope by Pian.
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In the quiet heart of the forest, where rivers remember ancient songs, there is a color that never fades, the deep blue of hope.
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It lives in the morning sky, in the wings of the butterfly, in the eyes of those who wait patiently for a new season to arrive.
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The elders say blue is the spirit of healing, the breath between sorrow and joy, the sacred path where broken hearts learn to bloom again.
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She walks beneath the blue horizon, carrying the dreams of her ancestors, carrying the prayers of her people, carrying the belief that tomorrow can still bring beauty.
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The butterfly whispers beside her, Do not fear the darkness.
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Even the longest night must surrender to the dawn.
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So she follows the blue light forward through forests, rivers, and memories, for hope is not a distant place.
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It is the quiet strength inside her, the ancient song in her soul, the promise that life continues to open its wings.
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To understand how to move more deeply into our own pain or discomfort, let's start from the larger world around us.
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Then we will step into how we ourselves face these difficulties.
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With that deeper understanding, we will then journey into a guided meditation to be present with ourselves by becoming loving listeners.
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Siddhartha, who became the enlightened Buddha, was born in 563 BCE.
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When he was born, he lived within the beautiful housing of his family.
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He had all he needed to live happily.
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There was never a time he needed anything that he wasn't gifted from his family.
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As Siddhartha grew into his teenage years and towards adulthood, he began to want to know more people, not just outside as well.
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One day, without telling his parents, Siddhartha went out of the gate and out into the city.
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What he expected was not what appeared before him.
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Instead of joy, he found suffering.
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The anguish and fear surrounded many of the persons who seemed to be living on the streets.
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His heart broke in half, and yet he knew not to look away and ignore it.
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Siddhartha's heart opened to allow being present for others.
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He let his parents know this new path was his to follow, and that he needed to head away from home.
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Siddhartha's initial exploration was to try many different types of spiritual or religious practices, to see what helped him move past himself into the presence of others.
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After many attempts, one day he went to sleep and dreamt.
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The dream revealed to him that it was time to stop, to be silent, to sit with the wisdom of the Bodhi tree, and to move within himself.
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Once this happened, he realized it could not be everyone he helped.
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Those he could be present for would be those who had the courage to be on the path to understanding life as more than the human self.
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Life is also its spiritual self.
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The image, the feeling, the presence spiritually present within Buddha, under his magic of the Bodhi tree, is always present within ourselves.
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Finding peace within ourselves, no matter what emotions are running through us, is the gift.
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Now, as we travel closer inside this story, we can learn to see the wholeness of ourselves.
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I would like to share what has come forward for me, not because I expect to be treated with kindness, but instead how I use these unexpected hard times to learn even more about myself.
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This then might be helpful for you as we then move into the guided meditation.
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In November of 2025, I, Janet Sullivan, was unexpectedly diagnosed with glioblastoma left brain temporal stage 4 cancer.
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For the first time in my life, I was moving away from the position of being present for each of my clients and students for 25 years.
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I have always seen myself as being the one who gives to others.
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In this diagnosis, it required me and my partner to focus on the treatments for me to be open to receiving assistance from everyone around me.
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My partner, my family, my friends, my community, my students.
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At first, I was open emotionally to all the love and support.
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It was my first experience of receiving so much support from others.
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Food, cards, being driven everywhere by my partner Todd and my friends' financial support through donations.
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But then, in June of 2026, a hard pattern of events occurred four times that kept me having to return to the hospital for care and discovering new challenges to face.
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I became lost in the sadness and challenges of it, where it was easier to be in deep spaces of grief.
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One night, a door opened up within me, and my angelic team whispered to me instead of hiding from the feelings, it would be better to open the door to them all and listen.
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I sat in the quiet darkness and was gifted the poem called The Guest House, written by the poet Rumi.
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The poem flowed around me.
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This being human is a guest house.
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Every morning, a new arrival, a joy, a depression, a meanness.
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Some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
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Welcome and entertain them all, even if they're a crowd of sorrows who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture.
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Still treat each guest honorably.
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He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
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The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
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Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
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As I sat in the darkness allowing the poem to fill me, I shifted into meditation.
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My present self was inside the home and heard a knock at the door.
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I walked to the door and opened it.
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Outside it was every year of myself, each time wanting to be recognized.
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I stepped back and welcomed each part of me into the living room of our home.
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I closed the door and was ready to create an organized circle for us.
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This is not what happened, however.
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There was no holding back just as chaos occurred in Rumi's poem, so it happened in the reflection of the meditation.
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I allowed it to just flow through me.
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My present adult self and my higher self stood to the corner and just listened and watched all the parts of myself, whether it was pain or joy or sorrow or fear or hope or despair, we let it be.
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As all the energy flowed and diminished during the meditation, my present self looked to the door of our home and saw the front door was open.
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I looked past the door to the patio, and beyond the patio to a path in the grass.
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The grass path was woven upwards onto a hill where at the very top stood a beautiful bodhi tree.
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Under the tree sat Buddha, breathing deeply, with relaxed shoulders and an open heart.
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Each part of me inside our home was ready to leave the emotions behind and walk with me up to sit under the Bodhi tree with Buddha in a loving and open silence.
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Around the tree with Buddha were soft places of leaves and grass.
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Each part of myself created loving groups to hold one another in connection and comfort.
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We all sat together under the Bodhi tree among the gentle breath of Buddha, which made the soft wind shimmer the leaves.
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The gentleness surrounded us.
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As I took a breath in and exhaled, slowly my body relaxed and came back to my present self.
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I opened my eyes and felt the hardest energy had shifted, allowing my heart to lighten.
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I breathed deeply and thanked my angelic team and Rumi for his poetry, and Buddha for his presence.
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The understanding in this moment was not that this meditation was a one-time fixed experience.
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My angelic team internally explained to me that when these feelings come up again, I now have a tool to use that allows those parts of myself to be heard.
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Having explored from the outside with our teacher Siddhartha, who became Buddha, and having moved closer through my experience of being present to difficult emotions, we can now move into you, getting to be more present with your emotional body and what it wants to share with you.
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Let us now move deeply by going into a guided journey of presence.
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Look for a comfortable place to be seated.
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In this meditation, it is better to remain present to the parts of yourself that are wanting attention.
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Take the next minute to find a comfortable place to sit.
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Let's do that once again.
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Take a deep breath in and exhale.
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Now when you are ready, place both of your hands on your chest.
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Feel your energy moving to your heart, and then gently back to your hands.
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What emotions are currently being shared with you from your body, from times of the past or present?
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In the next moments of quiet, allow those parts of you to come forward.
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Taking a deep breath in and then exhaling fully, you begin to hear the beautiful poem by Rumi, the guest house.
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This being human is a guest house.
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Every morning a new arrival.
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A joy, a depression, a meanness.
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Some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
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Welcome and entertain them all.
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Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture.
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Still, treat each guest honorably.
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He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
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The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
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Meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
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Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
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The present part of you inside the house feels the opening of your heart.
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You hear a knock on the door and go to open it up.
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You see the ages of yourself who are present today, allowing them inside.
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Each part of yourself begins to share with you all the emotions that are present.
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Whether it is joy or pain, anger or grief, hope or despair, enough or not enough.
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In the next moments of silence, allow all the emotions within you to be expressed.
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Inhale now and slowly exhale.
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As all of you are now present for each other and having moved through the emotions, a calmness settles through all of you.
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You now all look at the front door and see that it is opened up, showing all of you that in the near distance is a beautiful bodhi tree, and sitting beneath its branches is the calm and loving presence of Buddha.
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You all stand together in love and in honor and begin to leave the home and walk to the trail together, coming up the hill to the Bodhi tree.
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The Bodhi shines brightly in the sun and waves its branches, inviting all of you to sit under the branches.
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As you gather under the branches and Buddha sits with you, the silence is not out of being quiet, but out of holding a loving space for all of your emotions.
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Take this next moment of silence to be a time where Buddha honors all the parts of you and holds each emotion lovingly.
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During this time, receive the loving energy as a gift which is under the beautiful blue sky with the passing by of white loving clouds under the long arms of the Bodhi tree and the strength of Buddha.
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Inhale slowly and exhale gently.
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And one more time taking a deep breath, opening your lungs, and slowly releasing.
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As you look around, you see now that it is just you.
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All of you has come back together, grateful to be now back together again.
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You feel the loving energy around you and inside of yourself, knowing you can come back to this space when emotions arise again.
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Placing both hands now once again on your heart, you thank your higher self and Buddha's presence for walking on this journey with you.
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As you take one more deep breath in and move into an exhale, you find yourself back into today.
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Know that when we hold space for each part of ourselves, we create a deeper understanding of ourselves.