Speaker 1:
0:00 Now it's time to be dangerous. Now it's time to get risky. Now it's time to truly find out what you're made of and what you could achieve. Now it's time to truly find out how many lives you can impact. Now it's time to find out what you were destined to become. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to Raw Minds. I'm Anthony.
Speaker 2:
0:19 And I'm Eric.
Speaker 1:
0:21 We're your hosts.
Speaker 2:
0:22 Hell yeah.
Speaker 1:
0:24 Scene's looking a little different than the last episode yeah, definitely man, you're. You're back at home, safe and sound back at home traveled like fucking 5 000 kilometers within the last 24 hours yeah, we were fucking everywhere, all over the place.
Speaker 2:
0:37 Here, man, I'll tell you this the couch is lonely without you over here, definitely man, yeah, bud. Well, it's like I was saying on the phone earlier, like it's fucking weird, like talking to, I'll tell you this man the couch is lonely without you over here definitely man.
Speaker 1:
0:44 Yeah, bud. Well, it's like I was saying to you on the phone earlier, like it's fucking weird, like talking to you now because I know now, I know all your places and stuff which is trippy.
Speaker 2:
0:54 Yeah, it's crazy man.
Speaker 1:
0:56 Yeah, man.
Speaker 2:
0:57 But yeah, it's, I like it, man. I appreciate your help. You know I had you to help. You know I had a great. I had a great week with you. You know we had some good times. We ate some good food and spent some good money, man, but we had a good time, man.
Speaker 1:
1:10 so fucking right, we did.
Speaker 2:
1:12 Yeah, it was good you know it's time to get you doing on out here pardon me.
Speaker 2:
1:16 Oh yeah, I definitely want to come out there, you know. I just I just want to give it one more shout out to like all the people too that helped us, man, I just want to help them out one more time, you know. So we have on the spot mobile repairs man. Great guys, you know they'll really help out. Yeah, then we have, you know, nate, that that hooked us up, you know, right. So thank you again. And uh, tire, I mean uh, door-to-door tires, man, those guys were great too, right? So thank you so much once more, once again, for all your guys' help.
Speaker 1:
1:50 Yeah, met some cool people while I was out there too, man, and the cool thing is is that people that we've got coming up on the show I get to that we're interviewing, like I've already met them in person now you know, so pretty cool met them in person now.
Speaker 2:
2:03 Yeah, no, yeah, very cool yeah, man so we have a great episode today we do we have gallagher. He's um, he's got his own podcast. Yeah right, gallagher's grip. Yeah, I love it. He's all over tiktok. You guys should follow him. I'll get him to drop his socials and you can. You'll be able to find it below, but I think we should bring him out.
Speaker 1:
2:26 Bring him on out.
Speaker 2:
2:27 Let's do this. It's hard to do it from over here. I've got to learn.
Speaker 1:
2:32 You're far away bro.
Speaker 2:
2:33 Yeah, there he is, man. What's going on, daniel?
Speaker 3:
2:37 What's up guys? How are you?
Speaker 2:
2:39 Good man.
Speaker 3:
2:40 Good, appreciate you having me on Hell yeah, man, I love your content.
Speaker 2:
2:45 Man, we have reshowed and we hit it off. Man, we are stoked to have you on and to tell your story. Man, you're on our buddy's podcast too. Dad Talks. That's awesome. I watched the episode there, wicked episode. So shout out to them.
Speaker 3:
3:03 Those guys are great. Yeah, I appreciate you putting me in touch to them. Those guys are great. Yeah, I appreciate you putting me in touch with them and I'm happy to be here, happy to be on your show. I think you guys are fantastic. I do love the new backdrop too. It looks amazing. Thank you For the record.
Speaker 2:
3:16 I think it looks great. That's my casting coach. Yeah, but it's you know the problem is the coach, is you? Know the problem is the country you know, uh, anyways so, uh, uh, first off, we'd love for you to plug your, your, all your socials and stuff first, so we can, yeah, well, I mean yeah, just I started a podcast, gallagher's grip, you know, and and and, uh, you know that show is about real life stuff, very similar to you guys.
Speaker 3:
3:48 That's why I respect what you guys are doing and how you're doing it. Very similar platform and I am on YouTube, I am on TikTok, we're on quite a bit the Apple podcast, the Spotify, et cetera, and I'll send that all to you. But I appreciate you letting me do that, yeah man?
Speaker 2:
4:05 Definitely so, and I'll. I'll send that all to you, but I appreciate you letting me do that?
Speaker 3:
4:07 Yeah, man, definitely. Yeah, yeah, kind of kind of a lot of heartfelt messages there on the tick tock side, you know it's, I don't know A lot of my friends are like, man, you're just, you're just really pumped up and really, you know, too ramped up and excited. And I'm thinking well, you know, the topics we talk about are really affecting, you know, men. They're really affecting human beings and it's like you talk about divorce. You talk about you know what guys go through when they go through a divorce and you talk about so many different topics.
Speaker 3:
4:36 Of course, I believe that we forgot about the man, but you talk about that stuff and get you worked up. You know it gets you worked up. You know it gets you worked up. So, yeah, I bring up topics that you know, like you guys, nobody wants to talk about and I bring them up and I talk about them and I, you know, make sure that. You know I try to say what most people don't want to say, or I try to say things that people you know want to say but don't say because I don't think it's correct or will get them in trouble or et cetera. So, yeah, I don't care, I don't care.
Speaker 2:
5:08 Hell yeah man. Love it, fucking love it, man, just raw shit. You know what I mean. It's just raw shit that needs to be heard, man.
Speaker 1:
5:18 Well.
Speaker 3:
5:19 I'll tell you what guys I've had a couple people on on lately that that you know are really. You know we're focused on divorce. You know, and in particular it's the whole word divorce and what a guy goes through when he gets divorced at a at a national level, at a state level. You know, in my state, where I live, in Illinois, it's, it's disastrous for the man. You know not to you know, continue to speak about divorce. But oh my God, some of these stories that these guys are telling me are utterly shocking.
Speaker 3:
5:50 It's like is that really true? Can that really happen? Did the courts really do that to you, knowing the facts are the complete opposite? I mean I feel bad. I feel bad for the man. I feel bad for the man in this country. I do, I do.
Speaker 2:
6:04 Yeah, I've heard a lot of horror stories, definitely, but it is turning around. I have to say it is turning around. It was a struggle, like when I was going through my courts. It was a definitely big struggle, but I do have to say it's turned around. I've known now four people that I know closely that have just gone through it, and one custody and my buddy's just going through it right now.
Speaker 1:
6:29 Yeah, yeah, right, the other night.
Speaker 2:
6:30 Yeah, you met him and it's looking really good from, but I mean, he had his ducks in a row too right, you got to be on top of that as well well, you know, I I brought this up a couple days ago, uh, in a, on a public platform.
Speaker 3:
6:42 I think the reason why it's turning around my opinion only is because of these kinds of shows, because of social media because, so many people are speaking out saying what, what in the hell is happening here?
Speaker 3:
6:57 you know uh men, men, don't talk about, about, you know, these kinds of things. Hey, I had court today and the judge did not give me custody and oh, by the way, I've got to pay X percentage and I can barely live now because I'm giving it all to her and them. You know, nobody talks about that. What guy really sits down and talks about that openly? I'm not talking about a circle of friends, I'm just saying openly you know, it just doesn't happen.
Speaker 3:
7:21 So I think the social media outlook, the social media platforms, I think it's exposing the reality and I think it is changing yeah, definitely, man.
Speaker 2:
7:31 You know it's just it's it needs to happen because, like, a lot of men take their lives because of these situations where they lose everything in their life you know a big majority of it. It's fucking hard, man, and then you're left there standing pretty much with your dick in your hand, like what do I do now?
Speaker 3:
7:48 I have a friend of mine who turned 60 years old, very successful man in the construction related industry, went through a divorce, lost 70% of everything, had to move out, is living with a friend in the basement of his friend's house to try to get his life back together because he had to start all over to be able to buy a house, build a house et cetera. And you know this is 60 years old. I mean, you know, 60 years old, you're starting over. That's a hard deal.
Speaker 3:
8:17 You know that's a hard deal to swallow right, but it happens all the time.
Speaker 2:
8:20 All the time. You know I've done it about five times now in my life. You know what I mean, but it builds character. Anyways, you know you're resilient, be strong. Sometimes it's fucking hard, yeah, but you know what? There's better days ahead. It's just it sucks at the moment, man, but there's always better days ahead, definitely it's hard, though it's terrible, it's just terrible.
Speaker 3:
8:44 What you hear, man, you know, like in my world, right, you know, we all have stories, everybody's got a story. Some stories are worse than others by a long shot, but everybody's got a story. Certainly when you get up in age up, you know, I mean up in age, I'm in my 40s, but you know you cannot not have a story. Okay, you go through life and life is a tough animal as we all know it's a tough animal.
Speaker 2:
9:14 Yeah, well, me and Anthony felt a good portion of it this week when he came down. It was just nothing but a little bit of small little struggles, like my. My tire popped on the side of the highway. I didn't have the lock nut, I couldn't, or the key for it. I don't know where the hell it was. Then they couldn't get it off because they couldn't find the right one. So then they had to try to torch it off, but it was, uh, seized. It was a nightmare. It was just a nightmare. But you know what? We got it done. We, we moved forward, we had a good time while doing it, and at least I had my brothers beside me, also had Owen there. So it was good, it was good.
Speaker 3:
9:49 Did you ever have a day like that? And you actually just said, screw it. And you chose to simply go home and spend the rest of the day at the house and start over the next day?
Speaker 2:
10:01 Yeah, Did you ever have that? A few times, yeah, yeah, what? What was that movie where um buddy gets fired or whatever he's on the he's just trying to bring like a birthday present to his daughter I think he was a mailman or something and it was and then jack nicholson's at the burger no, it wasn't jack nicholson, I don't know. It's like a bad day or something like that. Yeah, he, just he starts going on though a killing story.
Speaker 2:
10:27 He's talking about anger management is that no, no what that wasn't arnold schwarzenegger in that movie no, no, I forget what it is, but he goes like on like a little bit of a killing spree. He's just having a shit day. Anyways, it doesn't matter. Yeah, well, we didn't end up like that. I was trying to make my point. Yeah, you know, we had a.
Speaker 3:
10:49 We made it fun yeah, well, that that's half the battle, right there, right yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:
10:56 So, um, I'd love to uh know a little bit more of your story, man, and and, um you know, to share it you know, I, I, uh, I guess I'm the type of guy I've, I've.
Speaker 3:
11:11 I went to college in in nashville, you know, and my dream was to become a country music singer. Okay, and I, I decided to move to nashville, was in Nashville for seven years, okay, and I was really involved in the Nashville scene, had an incredible producer, you know, I actually had two country singles released in the Nashville scene and was on the road for several years actually seven years and wanted to really give that a shot. I did give it a shot and I loved every second of it. You know, it was pretty amazing to be with those people and that click. You know, eric, it's just, you know, if you love country music, I just love country music.
Speaker 3:
11:55 And you know, I remember one time believe it or not, true story I was on music row, second Avenue, and I was in my mom's car. Story I was on Music Row, 2nd Avenue and I was in my mom's car. She came down to visit me, right, and I was backing up out of the driveway of one of these houses that we were at and I literally backed right into Taylor Swift, okay, and just destroyed her car, literally right. And so it's my mom and me, and very true story, my mom and me, and it's, it's, it's Taylor and her mother, and, and and this is when Taylor she had she didn't release any music yet. This was very early on in her career. But that's the first and only time I met her. But oh my God, I'll just my fault, right, you know, yeah, it just didn't go the way I wanted it to. Big picture. You know it was tough for me to, you know, put my, my whole career in somebody else's hands who can truly just make a phone call and say, hey, you know what we're done.
Speaker 3:
12:55 Yeah, and that wasn't me and my personality you know. So I came home, I moved home, you know I had my degree. I was going to get my college degree in business at that point. I got it, you know, came back home and started a whole bunch of companies involved in all kinds of stuff, you know, from staffing to healthcare, staffing, healthcare agencies. Man, I even started an online recruitment company called myizocom. That was very tough, you know, to really get going and off the ground, but then I got into construction the lovely world of construction, you know, and you know how could you not love construction and really got into it?
Speaker 3:
13:34 And you know, I opened up a construction company with a partner of mine and and that's kind of when things went, you know, I I climbed up the top of Mount Everest and I jumped down Mount Everest, but I didn't have a parachute on. That's kind of the analogy. And the reality is is, oh my God, what an experience that was. You know, it's a very large construction company doing construction in multiple states. But you know, the truth is it grew too quick. Right, it just it grew too quick. We were marketing it, we were doing great work right, we were doing great work.
Speaker 3:
14:08 Then we got this large client, of course, you know, going for the bigger jobs, and we started this larger job. We have employees, you got payroll, you got taxes, you got everything that comes with the company, you know, as you guys know, but he didn't, he chose not to pay us. You know, the guy, you know, chose not to pay us. So I mean, here we are with all these, all these employees, all this responsibility, and you know, this receivable that we were waiting for quite patiently, uh, never came, and it was quite a bit of money. It was quite a bit of money and couldn't do it, Couldn't, couldn't operate, didn't have lines of credit back then, Didn't have, you know, a financial backup plan, so to speak, because we didn't want to, we didn't like lines of credit and company went down and it went down like a rock. And you know, in situations like that you never want it, you don't want that to happen to the owner or a partner.
Speaker 3:
15:00 You don't want anything like that to happen definitely not you don't want your employees to get hurt, you don't want jobs to not get finished. You don't want that because you do things, because you love it right now. That was, that was this case, you know. Yeah, guys, it was such a dark two-year fallout. For me it was indescribable. It the nastiest, darkest black cloud that you could ever imagine being in. And I know a million people go through things a million times worse. I understand that. But for me it was the worst two years of my life because, ultimately, what happened?
Speaker 2:
15:37 Well, you can't compare that though, right. Like everybody has their heart, your heart. It could be someone's different heart. You know what I mean, you know so you're like it could be someone's different heart. You know what I mean. It's hard for you, man, and that was definitely. I can't imagine, man, that's your whole life, right. What feeds you, your kids? Everything, man, Definitely life-changing.
Speaker 3:
15:57 Oh, it was. It was. As you know, you go from doing really well to true story, not even having $20 to your name, with a wife that you know that's pregnant with your second child, right, you have a son that's around four years old and and I didn't even I didn't have $20 to my name. I mean, I didn't have 20. I woke up, you know, every morning thinking, holy shit, what am I going to do here? But I'll tell you what, guys, you want to know. The biggest lesson I learned, the biggest lesson I learned, whether we like to admit it or not, is simple. No one cared, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. The company had a huge fallout. It was all over, right. It's a big, big deal, right? And? And I had to make it right, right? So, at the end of the day, I had to pay back a lot of these customers. But guess what I did? I worked two years straight, seven days a week, and busted my ass like you can't fathom and did deals and worked, and worked to pay back these customers to make sure that they were taken care of, and I did it. Back these customers to make sure that they were taken care of, and I did it.
Speaker 3:
17:08 And through that two year run you go through so much depression. I mean, every day you wake up, the phone's ringing, people are at your door wanting money, people are screaming at you, lawsuits are being filed, nobody cares, right? You find yourself completely alone. You're completely alone, completely in the dark, not to quote Al Pacino. But you know you're in the dark, right? So I got super depressed, guys. I mean super depressed, and you know, I don't know, it's hard to show depression. I don't think a lot of show that they're depressed.
Speaker 3:
17:36 You know, and you know I'm not proud to say this, it's embarrassing for me to say this, but but I got so depressed that I drove to a train track in my local town, all cards on the table, walking down the train track every day, negative, hateful, spiteful, zero happiness, zero positivity, just surrounded and engulfed with negativity. And you're working so hard and you don't know what way to go. You don't even know if the way you're going is the right way. All you need to know is that you have to make money, because I had to pay back a whole ton of people to make it right, which I did, but I was in such a dark spot that I'm walking down the train track and I was going to throw myself in front of a train. I truly was going to throw myself in front of a train because it was so hard for me. You know when you, when you go, you know when you do two years, not not a couple of days, not a couple of months, two years straight. You know, terrible right, day in, day out, day in, day out. You know I mean it's it sucked right.
Speaker 3:
18:40 So my depression was so bad that, you know, I'm like, you know, I just can't do this anymore. I went there and was walking down the train track, kept on walking, kept on walking, and then I sat down on a log because, thank God, there wasn't a train and I don't mean to be funny when I say that, but thank God. So I'm sitting down on this log and I'm so upset, I'm so down, you know, and I look down at the ground and I see my son's eyes and it's almost like he said you know, dad, don't do this. You know, dad, we need you, don't do this, this is a mistake. And I'm looking down on the gravel, you know, and I'm seeing him, and I don't know what happened to me. But I got up and then I got so angry, I got so pissed off that I would even allow myself to consider doing what I was going to do, you know, because of what other people were saying.
Speaker 3:
19:34 Other people were doing, other people were texting and saying about you, you know, and at the end of the day, all these employees we had, all these people that were surrounded by the situation, none of them knew the truth, none of them knew, you know, the biggest thing that they didn't do, and it was shocking to me, but nobody actually asked questions. Nobody, because they didn't care. But at the end of the day, nobody didn't. What the hell's going on? What happened? What's going on with you? What happened to the company? What happened, you know, with the situation? Nobody sat down and just asked a simple question. Nobody. They all scoured, they all ran, they all believed hearsay, bull, crap, you know. But what they all didn't realize was we couldn't continue because we didn't, we didn't get this huge receivable that would allow us to move to the next step, the next level.
Speaker 2:
20:25 Yeah, did you ever go to get it or to go after the company for the cash Tried to?
Speaker 3:
20:34 But you want to know something in the world of legal. I had a lesson there at the highest level. You want to take somebody to battle? You'll solve it, maybe for five years of your life, depending on who you go up against. I don't believe in the legal system. You know, here, I think it's nothing, but it's. It's ridiculous. But you know, you want to sue somebody, you want to pound your chest? No problem, no problem. What I learned is that when you want to sue somebody, go ahead, they'll. They'll kick it down the road for five years. Five years, I mean, there's a. That whole thing is a huge game, it's nothing but a game.
Speaker 3:
21:07 So the answer to your question, eric, is yes and then no. No, yeah when you don't have any money to fight, and that was me yeah because I needed my money to buy food yeah, 100.
Speaker 2:
21:21 You know, same thing happened to me. So when I first started my company um, I had a former company and first job I did I got fucked over. They didn't pay me. Luckily I had enough banked. I wasn't a big company, it was my first job when I had a couple employees but I had enough banked money to be able to pay them. I had like three months worth of I kept in my my bank account to pay them just in case. And I was eating katie and fucking rice man for the longest time, dude, and I just had a baby. I mean, I was feeding my baby, but everything else it was hard man.
Speaker 2:
21:58 So I I feel you on that definitely and I couldn't fight them like I they I try to put a lien on the building, but they paid I don't know you can pay some some bullshit so they can't put liens on there and that's what they did. So I couldn't put a lien and it just wasn't worth it going after them and I was just gonna lose. I didn't have the the lawyers behind me, what they did, so I couldn't put a lien and it was just it wasn't worth it going after them and I was just going to lose. I didn't have the lawyers behind me, like they did.
Speaker 3:
22:22 Yeah, yeah, and that's, and again, that's the decision that you ultimately have to make. Is it really worth it? You know, in my case, you know we did have a cushion, you know, but but the you know the reality is is that you know that we kept going, but it ran out.
Speaker 2:
22:38 And the reality is.
Speaker 3:
22:39 It's like well, wait a minute, how much longer should we go here? And then all of a sudden you find that you're getting to a code red point in the bank account and it's like we just can't. You know, this just ain't working, we can't do it. But yeah, it sucks, the world of law in business sucks and it takes that experience. It takes an experience like that to really learn it at that level.
Speaker 2:
23:01 Yeah, definitely. That's why I don't like contracting anymore, man, because you're just chasing paper all the time in the construction area and they'll fight you over a buck, man. You know, sometimes it gets fucking brutal.
Speaker 3:
23:15 Well, the issue I see there is, you know, the do-it-yourself channels and the educational channels about how something should be so meticulous, which you know, I agree. If you pay somebody to do a job, it needs to be professional.
Speaker 2:
23:27 We get it right.
Speaker 3:
23:28 But you know the constant callbacks because a piece of trim on the inside is not at a flawless 45. You know come on. Yeah.
Speaker 1:
23:36 It's too much. You waste so much, no.
Speaker 1:
23:37 I hear you I find there's a huge misconception when it comes to owning a construction company too and I was guilty of it before I owned my own company, right, you hear your boss talk about so many dollars a square foot. You go home, do the math on your calculator. It's like, oh, this is a $15,000 job and we got it done in a week. But that's all they hear. Right, it's like, oh, you're making so much money. It's like, well, no, I got vehicles to pay for, I've got tools, I've got maintenance on the tools, I've got fasteners, I've got insurance, not only on the company but on each employee and myself. Then I've got to pay for fuel. There's all things, taxes, and people lose sight of all that because they they go home say, oh, I made four dollars a square foot on a ten thousand square foot building that's forty thousand dollars, it's like I don't I.
Speaker 1:
24:24 when I had my own company, I like I, I would tell my guys all the time like listen, you guys think I make money on this, but what you guys take home is way more than I actually take home. Like my take home is fucking way less than what you guys do. You guys are the ones making money here. The only difference is is my company pays for everything, where my take home for my groceries and stuff Like I don't get that shit, like there's nothing left for me at the end of a build if it doesn't go my way.
Speaker 2:
24:50 Right yeah.
Speaker 1:
24:51 And a lot of time it doesn't. But that's the risk that you take as the owner, right, there's no risk on the employees. They come in, they do their job, they go home, they get paid. Right, there's no risk on them, unless you run into a situation where money gets fucking tight and I was in a very similar situation as well um, but we won't get into it. It's just people always hear, like, oh, construction, you make so much money, you do, but you also have, even though you don't have, like a brick and mortar location, or maybe you do, but and you may not have overhead, like a lot of overhead, but the taxes, the insurance and all that shit adds up to more, in my opinion, than having that overhead. Like there's a lot more risk involved.
Speaker 2:
25:31 Man, it's fucking wild plus, then you got to worry about if your employees are getting hurt.
Speaker 1:
25:36 Yeah, you know, that's another one. We have WSIB over here, we have WCB, yeah, but yeah the workman's comp comes in.
Speaker 3:
25:48 That's why the workman's comp rate is shockingly unfair and high through the roof for any business owner. I mean, I got a workman's comp audit next week. We got a workman's comp audit next week. We got a workman's comp audit next week. God knows what the hell they're going to actually find. And then what happens is is that the audit comes, the audit goes and you know, you think you, you think you're okay, but guess what, guess what. You go to your mailbox, you take out the mail, you open it up and it's a massive, massive bill. And it's, I mean, don't even get me started on the insurance companies, don't even get me started on the workman's comp, full audits of your books and records, the whole nine yards.
Speaker 3:
26:23 It's a con. It's a con. I'll say it openly. It's ridiculous, actually, the way that that whole thing operates. It's terrible, guys. It's terrible, but you're right. A $15,000 job, the owner's probably taking home $1,000. And guess what? You know, even if it's $2,000, guess what Overhead? You know, you're right, you know Anthony, gas, overhead, taxes, insurance, and the list just keeps on. Tools you know Everything. You know.
Speaker 2:
26:51 A big thing I see too is like you know, you got your workers and you buy all these tools for them, but a lot of times, like they're not respecting the tools, man, they're dragging them around, dropping them like not giving a shit man, you know.
Speaker 1:
27:04 And then they get lost. Everything's a hammer when you don't have to pay for it yourself.
Speaker 2:
27:07 Exactly right, that's you know. I see that happen all the time and that fucking kills companies too, man, by spending all the money all the time on new tools, fucking headache.
Speaker 3:
27:21 I had a lot of vans, right, we had a lot of those tall Ford vans where we put our tools. And I will never forget the day because I was more in the office pushing it forward and I'll never forget the day when I came down and went into the shop and I opened up one of our vans and it's brand new. This is, this is a brand new deal here, right, and I opened it up, probably been on the road for, you know, four months, destroyed. The interior was destroyed. Now, when I say destroyed, let me, let me be clear I mean dense all over the, the, you know, over the. You know those back fans are not finished, right, so get them finished whatever, but dents, cracks everywhere. I was flabbergasted, I couldn't believe my eyes.
Speaker 3:
28:07 I didn't think it was mine.
Speaker 2:
28:08 Yeah, it's ridiculous, and then that probably cost you a pretty penny.
Speaker 3:
28:12 Yeah. And then I asked somebody who did it and nobody knew, and everyone pled the fifth and guess yeah. And then I asked somebody who did it and nobody knew, and everyone pled the fifth. And guess what, bring it in. Yeah, there's five grand right there, four grand right there. Whatever it ends up to be, what are you going to do? File an insurance claim on your own employees?
Speaker 3:
28:26 Yeah yeah, you know it's tough. Being in business today is tougher now than I think it ever has been ever, I mean, it's just. It is, you know, and it's amazing to me, you know, I really wonder do people really know how unbelievably hard it is to truly start a company, market a company, run a company in the sake of a construction company in particular? Market for the company, find a job, find the people to do the job, run the job. Let's not even talk about all the paperwork that goes behind doing that, whether it be subcontractor documentation, the insurance, the list goes on. It is so hard that you know, anthony, it is almost worth just not doing it and getting a full-time job somewhere, going to work, putting in your hours, coming home and guess what.
Speaker 2:
29:20 Relaxing that's what.
Speaker 3:
29:21 I did.
Speaker 2:
29:22 Yeah.
Speaker 1:
29:24 I had too much of that bullshit, and that's what I mean. Like people just hear about the almighty dollar, right, they're like, oh, you made 15 grand this week and that's all they hear. They don't understand the rest of it here. They don't understand the rest of it. And the other part of it too is is like even when I wasn't physically at work and I was at home, I wasn't at home because I'm worried about keeping my guys busy for the next month and where am I going after this job?
Speaker 1:
29:46 And how many houses do they have in here for me to work on? You know, like it's more than just being in the moment with that shit you can't be, it's you're. You're fucking months in advance. And like I wasn't sleeping and the amount of money I was spending at the chiropractor because I was the one doing the work, because I was the one who was always like fuck it, I can do it better myself, so I'll just do it. So I didn't really teach my employees that much. I was bad for like micromanaging, but uh, yeah, just mentally it was exhausting, on top of the physical aspect of it too.
Speaker 3:
30:17 Yeah, yeah, it's very difficult. Small town, you know, or you know small business ownership, you know probably more cons than there are pros. You know, certainly in today's day and age. You know, you think about, you know well how are people really making money now. And you know, like my son who is now 11 years old, this kid can turn on a computer. He is an Apple a genius. He's got the iPad, the iPhone, the whole nine yards. I mean. Even even as early as today he was actually called over to a friend's house to help them set up his, his Xbox. You know, as funny as that sounds, they got a new setup and he set it up in five minutes. I mean.
Speaker 3:
30:58 I'm looking at him, I'm thinking, oh my God, this kid's amazing. You know what I mean. My point is like this next generation coming up. You know, I don't know if they're even going to be in the construction world. I don't know, man.
Speaker 1:
31:14 I think it's for fuck. I can't remember the exact stat, but they just put a stat out in Canada for every one guy that retires or I think it's every three guys that retire one guy is coming in Like we're losing a lot more than we're gaining.
Speaker 3:
31:28 So it's like fuck, am I just?
Speaker 1:
31:29 sticking out of the construction industry so that it like booms again, because I know it's going to happen. But at the same time I have those skills. Those skills aren't fucking going anywhere.
Speaker 3:
31:38 Yeah, it's like riding a bike and I think the boom's coming and I think it's coming quick. And, quite frankly, I think that actually I was reading an article last week that said in our world, here, the two most profitable scenarios per this article is anybody in the HVAC and plumbing world. They become the next big time scenarios there because it is going to come. I mean, look, I'm in Illinois here, right, I mean God, before 2008,. There were so many new homes, there were so many developments going up, there was so much activity was awesome, it was, it was mind blowing and it was the norm, right. Then, of course, 2008 came.
Speaker 3:
32:22 Everybody lost, you know, half, if not more, or all of their stuff and that was the great reset, right, and I I haven't seen a real development. I'm talking, you know real development in my area in quite some time, as far as you know plain, you know farmland being turned into, you know 72 lots and single family homes going up. You know, I haven't seen that in such a long time until this year. This year is the first year you know we're in 2025, right, I mean, this year is the first year you know we're in 2025, right, I mean, this year is the first year where I actually see real residential developments going up and it's awesome, it's so great to see you know, I think it's going to come back swiftly and I think it's going to be insane, for you know, I really I do. I think it's going to be insane here for the next 10 years. When does it really turn on? I don't know, but it's nice to see it starting to slowly turn on.
Speaker 1:
33:26 Yeah.
Speaker 2:
33:27 It's fucking booming over here. They're, they're putting up towers and places everywhere. I mean the last site I was working on it, everywhere. I mean the last site I was working on it was a 23-year project, and then there was another one that was a 26-year project.
Speaker 1:
33:43 I've never seen so many fucking cranes in my life, until I came there, yeah.
Speaker 2:
33:48 Oh yeah, putting up towers everywhere, man. Everywhere you look, there's construction.
Speaker 3:
33:55 Well, maybe I'll move by you.
Speaker 1:
33:59 It's gorgeous, dude. I recommend recommend it.
Speaker 2:
34:00 Yeah, oh yeah, we're surrounded by mountains. He was blown away you can go skiing on the mountains and swimming in the ocean in the same day yeah, that's living.
Speaker 3:
34:08 That's living. We're on matt. You know we're in april 6th. It's still 47 degrees outside. It's 47 degrees outside. I'm on, you know. I'm watching TV. I'm watching everybody golfing, you know the PGA Tour and they're all down south having a nice time and t-shirts.
Speaker 3:
34:26 It's like you know. A friend of mine lives in Vegas. He's like you know. Why would anybody live in the Midwest? You know Vegas. You walk outside. It's the same weather all day. Every day you wake up, you know what's hot, you know what you're in for, you know what you have to wear and, by the way, it rains here about six days out of the year. That's nice.
Speaker 2:
34:45 Yeah, I mean, I was wearing shorts yesterday.
Speaker 1:
34:48 Yeah, it was not warm when I got off the plane today. I'll fucking tell you that much.
Speaker 2:
34:52 It rained here today, like just in time. When you left man, you took the sunshine.
Speaker 1:
34:57 I think I saw it raining out the window of the plane as I was taking off.
Speaker 3:
35:00 Well, what was the temperature by you today?
Speaker 1:
35:03 Eric. Oh, for me 16 degrees Celsius when I left, really.
Speaker 2:
35:09 Last night, I think it was roughly around the same today too, like 16, 15.
Speaker 1:
35:14 When I landed here, it was minus one degree Celsius. It's fucking cold.
Speaker 3:
35:19 Yeah, see, I am in the Fahrenheit world, so I'm trying to do the conversion in my head.
Speaker 1:
35:23 I'll do it right now.
Speaker 3:
35:27 What is that? What is that Fahrenheit?
Speaker 1:
35:29 So zero when I landed today would have been 32. Yeah, it would have been 60.8 when I left.
Speaker 3:
35:39 Okay, not bad, bad.
Speaker 2:
35:39 So it's around like I think it was the other day. It was like 72, I think it would be 10 below zero. So that's why I ask and our gas is fucking expensive here fuck yeah, how much is it a gallon? It's a liter. What was it when you came here? It a gallon, it's a liter. What was it when you?
Speaker 1:
35:59 came here. It was a buck ninety-two.
Speaker 2:
36:01 Yeah, a liter, and that's cheap for us.
Speaker 1:
36:04 I'm going to do it right now.
Speaker 2:
36:06 Usually around like yeah, that's cheap for us man my man Actually I saw it at 160 something today.
Speaker 1:
36:13 I saw it at 118. Canada to you pretty funny man. He's like holy fuck, look at your gas man so at $1.92 a liter, which is what it was when I landed in Vancouver is $5.11 a gallon. Yeah, that's crazy yeah, that's crazy.
Speaker 3:
36:36 What I think is even more crazy is I love it when I'm at a stop light and I look at the gas station and they have their big sign on the corner and I don't know. I don't know I'm sitting there for what? Four minutes before the light turns green again and I look at the actual price of the gas and it constantly changes yeah, it like bounces back and forth yeah, it's almost like somebody's sitting in front of a computer and saying how much you want to make this, you know, today.
Speaker 3:
37:05 How much do you want to make this week? You know, I mean it's, it's unbelievable goes up 10 cents, then it'll drop five. I'm thinking who's doing that? Why is that happen? It's got to be on a national platform type deal coming out of a corporate usa or whatever I mean in our world. But I think that's crazy. I would love to be able to do that well, and the reason our gas went low here?
Speaker 1:
37:24 because they got rid of the carbon tax. So we had this horseshit tax that they fucking included, and when I left ontario it was like a dollar 50, so now that I'm back it's like a dollar 18. So since trudeau stepped down, they've scrapped the tax temporarily, until we have an election. So they scrapped the tax and now gas has gone down over 20 cents a liter like it's not here, I can ridiculous. Yes, it has, because it was a dollar 90 when I got there and now it's around a dollar 75.
Speaker 3:
37:50 That's yeah okay that makes sense actually okay you know, it always bothers me because, you know, I always ask myself why, why and I know it may sound ridiculous, but why? Why does gas have to be so high? What's changed from then until now? Why, you know why why, does gas have to be so much money? Uh, inflation, blah, blah, but why I just?
Speaker 2:
38:19 don't get it.
Speaker 3:
38:19 There's so many things that I hear about or even see. It's like you know, I know it's a free market. I get people set their pricing. But you know, take the auto industry, for example, which I read an article again last week, where there are more defaults on auto loans and I knew this was coming. Everyone knew this was coming More defaults on auto loans than there ever has been in the history of the United States of America, in our world, over here. Right, yeah, it's shocking Like the average person's car payment. I don't, I don't know the statistics, so I'm going to give a range here. But you know $800, $900,. You know $600, $700, $800, $900. You buy some of these new pickup trucks that are $1,000 a month. I mean, I don't care how much you make or don't make, that's a hell of a payment. That's a mortgage payment.
Speaker 2:
39:14 Yeah, dude, it is that's a mortgage payment.
Speaker 3:
39:17 Yeah, dude, it is. That's a mortgage. My question there is why? Why does that have to be? I just don't get it. Even the used car market. Now I have a friend of mine looking for a used truck. Oh, this is a great truck right there. How much is it? $33,000. Sweet. How many miles does it have on it? 120,000 miles on a gap, and it's not decent. I'm like you're gonna pay that for a car that's 120 000 miles on it. Are you crazy?
Speaker 2:
39:43 you know well, but people can afford. Yes, you have to do here we have icbc, which is our insurance company, and it's one fucking insurance company that owns it. So you there's not different companies you can go to. You have to go to them. They own the monopoly of it and they make the rules and it sucks yeah, I mean, doesn't anybody see the issue there?
Speaker 3:
40:08 you know, I mean, I don't know that's so bothersome to me. You know, doesn't anybody see, like the real problem there, because, because it's a huge problem?
Speaker 1:
40:16 Oh, definitely yeah that baffled me when I was out there, because in Ontario it's like you have to go get your own insurance and I can go wherever I want. So I shop around get the cheapest rate, but in BC you have to get it through them. And then you can add on extra insurance if you want it, but your base insurance has to be through the government. Yeah, which is fucking ridiculous.
Speaker 2:
40:38 So we have insurance shops, like separate little insurance shops, but you have to go to them and they do insurance on behalf of ICBC. Okay, it's wild man Fucking wild dude, and then they just gouge you for everything you know.
Speaker 3:
40:57 It's just yeah I don't know how people are living today. I don't, I really don't know your average. You know person, you know, with a single family income, a man goes to work every day, the wife stays home, whatever. I just I'm, I'm telling you guys, I mean I I've got, you know, a lot of friends right and they're struggling. You know, still they're struggling. I think it's going to turn around here, but I don't know how they do it it's hard, man, I'm.
Speaker 2:
41:25 I'm one of those parents. I'm a full-time dad. I'm a single full-time dad. My daughter lives with me also trying to juggle her going to school at the same time as working, but then being able to get her to get picked up to bring her home. It's fucking hard man.
Speaker 3:
41:41 Yeah, well, I give you credit, eric, because that that is hard and frankly I I don't know if I could. I mean you do it because you have to, but I mean, I've got two children, right, and I I my.
Speaker 3:
41:52 I give my wife a credit for doing that, because that would be a lot of added everything on your plate. I give you credit. I mean, how do you do that? I mean she goes to school in the morning and you got to rush to work and then come home and then you know how do you do it.
Speaker 2:
42:06 Yeah, pretty much man I was. I was getting help and stuff like that though, from some friends and yeah, just get a nanny in the morning, they would drop her off and then I would just pick her up after work.
Speaker 3:
42:21 Yeah, yeah, there's no other way, right? No, no.
Speaker 1:
42:25 Well, it's even as simple as a mortgage. I talked to my brother because my brother owns his own home and he's married, he's got a couple of kids, and I said to him I was like what's your all in like property tax, tax, insurance, all that shit a month just on your house, and what he told me was more than my monthly income. So it's like I just have to accept. As a single parent, I'll never fucking as a single income home, I'll never own my own home because I wouldn't, I would barely be able to afford it. And that's not including groceries, internet, any, any of that bullshit.
Speaker 1:
42:56 So it's like well, I guess I'm just going to fucking rent yeah.
Speaker 3:
43:00 Well, it adds up quick.
Speaker 2:
43:02 It is so expensive here in Vancouver for places Like a small little. I showed Anthony a place and was it like 1. It'd probably be 1.7, 1.6, that small little.
Speaker 1:
43:13 Yeah, it's fucking nuts yeah.
Speaker 2:
43:14 It's the property. It's insane, I'm telling you. It's insane, for for like a one bedroom you're looking to pay about I don't know 1800 one bedroom apartment for 1800. Yeah, 18 to 25 why?
Speaker 3:
43:34 is it just because at the moment it's scarce out there? Or is it just the beauty? What is it?
Speaker 2:
43:40 It's just people coming down here buying places up and just fucking up the market really. Oh, there's that too, greedy man. But I mean there is inflation too. Don't get me wrong. Property tax go up and all whatnot.
Speaker 3:
44:01 You know, my mom told me when she bought a house back when she was starting out, the last thing that she would look at was the property tax bill. That was the last thing that you would look at. And now it's the very first thing you look at because she said you know you pay off. You pay off a house over the course of time. Well, you still have the property tax bill, your property taxes. Some of the properties around where I'm at, you know 12, 13, 14 000 a year, guess what?
Speaker 3:
44:31 that's a mortgage payment, yeah, man, yeah, that's a mortgage payment, yeah the property taxes are so out of control in my world over here. It's unbelievable. It just what's going on. When is it going to change? You know?
Speaker 2:
44:44 and you know, and the thing is like, no wonder people have mental health, man, the stress of like doing all these things I mean over here. Uh, daycares are like 12 to even up to like from, I would say from 500 all the way up to about 1800 bucks.
Speaker 2:
45:00 At one point I was paying 1200 bucks for daycare because it's the only place, or not daycare, but before and after school it was the only place that was in my daughter's division and I needed it, so I it was like I was paying two rents, almost yeah yeah to watch your daughter for a couple hours a week yeah, yeah
Speaker 3:
45:23 you know, I, just I. I just you know I. I think about like the day-to-day struggles that you know a man goes through. I think about life in general. I think about my personally speaking, what I do when I go home. I wake up and I go to work and I work and then I go home and do it all over again and stuff. I get younger kids and I get you got to do what you got to do. Sometimes I ask myself. I actually say to myself I don't think we were put on this earth to do all of this craziness. I'm not trying to get weird here, but I don't think a human being was put on this earth to work a thousand hours a week and play in a game that, essentially, has been created by another human being. This is all created by human beings, right? Trying to play in this chess game or poker game or blackjack game, just to stay in the game and work your butt off, just to play in this system, and I mean, where's the life in that?
Speaker 2:
46:23 you know Well, taxes were supposed to be just temporary man, but they ended up. They're still here.
Speaker 3:
46:33 Yeah, it just doesn't make any sense to me anymore.
Speaker 1:
46:37 I told myself a while ago, like I'm not here to live, to work, like I'm here to work to live.
Speaker 1:
46:43 You know I go do my job and I spend my time with my kids. I don't want to do overtime. Fuck all that shit, go in, put in my hours. I'm okay with what I make. You know I'm not living in a fucking six bedroom mansion, but my kids are happy. I'm happy, that's all I need mansion, but my kids are happy, I'm happy, that's all I need. But some people would really struggle in my situation because the society is like such a fucking consumer society. You know, like buy this fucking buy that you need to have this, a new phone every two years, like all this bullshit, and it's just like no, I don't really need that fuck. The only thing I spend money on is tattoos, really, and that's for me, and they can't take those away unless they start cutting all my skin off, and I don't think they'll do that.
Speaker 2:
47:27 So I'm good. Oh, you never know, jeffrey dahmer, kind of shit yeah, sons of anarchy, you know yeah yeah but, but that, but you know, anthony, that is that.
Speaker 3:
47:37 That that is a epiphany that I went through, you know, because it's like you know what I want to be the dad that's really with my kids all the time. You know, I want to be the dad that's coaching baseball and soccer. I want to spend. That's a lot of time, you know I want to spend. I would rather do that than focus on making an extra dollar or two for what you know, for what you know my kids are going to remember. You know, I remember me coaching them for the rest of their lives. You know my dad coached me in baseball and other sports. I remember that, I really do. You can't forget that. You know.
Speaker 3:
48:08 The reality is is that once they hit a certain age, they're gone. And I don't mean they're gone as if you never see them. But you know, I got an 11-year-old son. I never see him. He see him. He's always at a friend's house, he's always with his friend or he's on, he's on the computer playing this fortnight deal or whatever, and you know, and they're all connected together on the earphones and I'm thinking that's your whole entire class, because, yeah, there's like 12 people playing. I can see how it is so addicting. When I grew up, I was playing duck hunter man hey, I got something.
Speaker 2:
48:40 Did you know? If you plug another controller in, the other person can control the duck.
Speaker 3:
48:45 I didn't know.
Speaker 2:
48:47 I know you can control the other. I just found this out. I watched a tiktok video about it and it's like if you plug it in, the other person with the controller can control the duck, so he can go like this while the other person is trying to shoot.
Speaker 3:
49:01 I didn't know that, but what an awesome game back then.
Speaker 2:
49:05 Fucking right it was With the dog that pops up.
Speaker 3:
49:09 The dog. And then what's the year it was, that it was Zelda. And then, of course, when Mike Tyson came out and everybody was learning to play that, those were the days.
Speaker 2:
49:22 And Contra Up down left right, a, b, a, b, what was it? Something else? I'll forget it. But yeah, put it in the comments if you remember, yeah.
Speaker 3:
49:36 Those were awesome games. Now my son asked me for what is it called?
Speaker 2:
49:44 Oh, I have one of those, yeah.
Speaker 3:
49:46 But but here's the interesting point. I said, okay, well, let me look into it, let me see it. Well, it's, you know, it's 700, yeah, 599, and then once you get that, you got to pay for all the other, you know, subscriptions that come along with it. It's hard to say no as a father.
Speaker 2:
50:06 And then you get in the vest because there's the vest. So if you get hit in the game in the chest, the vest will vibrate. They've got the wrist things. It gets crazy, man. It's non-stop.
Speaker 1:
50:16 Well, the funny thing I say about that too like I remember being a kid and our parents were, like, don't sit too close to the tv. And now we're just like fucking strapping to your face but they are and, and, and and.
Speaker 3:
50:30 You could clearly see why it's so addicting with that. But now you know, now every you know, you go to a restaurant, you go to. Yeah, I don't care if you go to a fast food place, you go to a restaurant. Everybody's on their iphone everybody glued to the iphones. I'll tell you. You go walk through an airport, anthony, how many people I was there today, everybody they're so just fucking ignorant to the world around them.
Speaker 1:
50:51 yeah, yeah, like I, literally. When I was getting off the plane I told eric this earlier I was trying to let the people who were beside me off because it was a man and a woman, they were older. So I said, oh, you guys go ahead. And then the fucking guy behind me was on his phone and he was trying to cut through and I just got in front of him. I'm like, no, no, you can wait, your fucking turn.
Speaker 2:
51:10 Yeah.
Speaker 1:
51:10 He just looks at me all stunned. It's like fucking have some respect for people, man, I'm kidding man.
Speaker 2:
51:18 My dad used to call it the heads down club, because everybody's got their heads down looking at their phone. You ever watch those on YouTube where, like you get all these people are walking around with their phones not paying attention when like falls in like a pond or whatever, Like just fucking idiots. Man Like pay attention.
Speaker 3:
51:36 I see the issue on you and the TikTok world. As you said earlier, you know, every time you swipe and TikTok's great's great, you know, but but every time you swipe it's, uh, somebody driving a lamborghini, somebody driving a new porsche, somebody saying they're in a. You know, they just bought this house. Or now, since spring is here, slash summer is right around the corner. Well, we just bought this, this yacht. You know, last week we only, we only paid $17.5 million for it. Have a great summer. That's a big issue.
Speaker 3:
52:07 That you know that's a big issue. And guess what? It only costs a million dollars a season to run.
Speaker 2:
52:13 Yeah.
Speaker 3:
52:13 No big deal, you know it's a million dollars. That's a problem. That's what's being ingrained in our kids' heads and you know that's not easy to get out. It's not easy to get out of their heads, you know. And then guess what? As a dad, your kids come up to you and say hey, dad, I want this, I want that, susie's got this, johnny's got that, you know, sarah has this.
Speaker 2:
52:35 And then, as a father, when they ask you for that, that is it's tough yeah, man, it's so hard saying no, you know, and then they give you the eyes and like please, you know, and like to be honest, I didn't have a lot of stuff like a good portion of my life growing up like. My dad was a longshoreman, so when I was a kid I was getting all this. But as soon as he was out of my life, you know, my mom was living off of a disability, you know. So it was rough growing up. So I want to give those things to my daughter.
Speaker 2:
53:05 But sometimes we're not in the situations where we can, like you said, the $800 Oculus you just can't see, because then you're just going to have to buy this and buy that and buy that and that's how they get you. It's a chase game. It's just like, anthony, when we went to Granville Island there and it was like we're the jungle gym for the kids, but then they put the toy store right in the fucking front of the entrance. Sure, you know what I mean. So then you've got to walk your kid by there and then they're just going to like I want in, I want in. Let's face it, half the shit they got in there is fucking junk right now. Anyways, you know, it's just, I don't know.
Speaker 3:
53:43 By design right 100% We've got a store here called Cracker Barrel and it's the same scenario, right? You know, I don't know if you guys have ever been to a Cracker Barrel- no, no, I've heard of it.
Speaker 1:
53:54 I'm familiar with it.
Speaker 3:
53:55 It really is a great restaurant, right, you right, you know country, food, big fireplace, that whole scene. But when you walk in, you just, you know, you just walk by about 10,000 available products for sale and you're not getting to the hostess to be to be seated until you walk past all those products. You know. And, and guess what, after you're done paying, when you have your kids, right, you have to walk past those 10,000 products. You know, guess what? Well, I want a candy bar, I want gum, dad, I want this, I want that.
Speaker 2:
54:26 Happens all the time. Yeah, and that's what it is. You have to walk past it first. So now the kids realize it. Oh, it's there. So now they know what they were going to ask for as they come want it all, man. So, like you said, by design yeah, when does it.
Speaker 3:
54:41 When does it? When do we actually get to relax, guys? You know, when do we get to take a deep breath and relax?
Speaker 2:
54:49 not a long time, buddy. It's so hard, man, you know, it really is, because we got to be the provider, we got to be all this, you know, and it's just it's, it's the weight that's on your shoulders all the time that when you're caring, especially as a father, you've got all these huge responsibilities. It's hard, it's hard to relax. It's almost like you're living in flight or flight mode all the time.
Speaker 3:
55:14 Yeah, and that's no way to live.
Speaker 2:
55:17 And.
Speaker 3:
55:17 I think I was probably in my mid thirties when I realized just that, you know, I really do. You know, I didn't get married until I was 30. You know, I had my, my, my son, and then, okay, here we go, we've got a child now. Then that whole, then your whole world changes again, right? I mean it changes right, and I'm not saying it changes for the bad, but I've watched so many episodes of Paw Patrol. I've watched I know every episode of let's see your Elmo God the list goes on and on and on.
Speaker 3:
55:50 You know, there was a point in time in my life where all I do I would come home with the kids, you know, and I would watch cartoons. You, know, Disney, everything. I don't even watch movies anymore, I think. I've seen Frozen 7.
Speaker 2:
56:04 I dressed up as Frozen because my daughter wanted me to be Elsa man. So I went out, put the dress, got the dress, put the wig on man and I walked fucking down the street as Elsa. I was singing, having a blast with her, because she wanted me to be it.
Speaker 3:
56:17 Yeah, I just, I would just love to see that. I'll send you a picture if you could do that I would, I would appreciate it.
Speaker 2:
56:26 It was awesome, though, like people are giving me high fives, you know it's good, you know, and at the end of the day, it was for her I would do that, for I wouldn't do that for nobody else in this world except for that little girl, you know, and she loved it. She's a big smile on her face. Just said it all right.
Speaker 3:
56:42 So what you do for your kids. Yeah, amazing. You know this goes for a father and a mother. Isn't it amazing in general what you do for your child? Definitely what you would do, you know yeah.
Speaker 2:
56:59 I do want to say, though have you guys ever caught yourself? Like you know, there's like, for instance, paw Patrol's on the TV and you're sitting there Watching it with the kids. Then the kids get up and walk away, and an hour later you're still just sitting there watching it. It would happen to me all the fucking time.
Speaker 1:
57:14 Oh yeah, you gotta see what fucking Ryder and the gang Get into Fucking right.
Speaker 3:
57:19 I've noticed that happens all the time and before when my daughter was younger oh yeah, or or you sit down and you find yourself alone for a moment, but guess what? You actually select that movie on purpose, because you know shortly thereafter they're going to be in the same room someone's coming in the room.
Speaker 2:
57:38 Yeah, yeah, definitely.
Speaker 3:
57:41 Kids are great. I know the guy goes through hell. I mean, we talk about mental health, we talk about things that a man goes through and men go through so much and it's just, in my opinion, truly coming to light recently, again because of social media. But men's mental health, they're starting to talk about it, they're starting to share their stories. That's why your guys' show is so great, because a lot of things you guys do reflect on is a true, you know, major worldly problem. You know, Eric, earlier you brought up the suicide rate. I don't know the exact statistics on the suicide rate, not to get dark here, but I know it's a huge number, right, and it's terrible because it shouldn't happen. You know, and everybody's got a story, like we said earlier before, but some people can't, you know, can't take it, you know some people and they need somebody to talk to right then and there, or or they're going to end it.
Speaker 3:
58:34 And you know, I feel so sad, for for those guys, I mean, look at my story, you know, if it wasn't for those eyes and those in that rock and that's true, it's every bit of true I don't know what would have really have happened that day. And I'm happy to be here, you know, but I think men have it really bad. I think they have it really really, really, really bad.
Speaker 2:
58:54 That's what I believe here's the thing man is like you know a woman and I and I'm. You can. You can hate me all the fucking you want, honestly, if you're listening. But, like a lot of the times, women want a vulnerable man and then when they're vulnerable, they'll be like what the hell, man, you're? You're a pussy, you're not tough enough for me, you know. So you're a lot of the times is you're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't well, the only argument I would make towards that um is like we don't know how to help ourselves.
Speaker 1:
59:25 And then women say they want a vulnerable man, and then we get vulnerable. We don't know what to fucking do with those emotions and then they don't either. You know, like, like we need professional help. We need like-minded individuals. You know, like therapy's fucking expensive. I know that, you guys know that. But if you can find yourself a network of people who you can relate to, it makes it a little bit easier. You know what I mean. For me it was recovery.
Speaker 1:
59:51 Addiction was a big fucking problem in my life and the only thing that gave me some semblance of sanity when I got out of that was talking to people who'd been through the same shit that I had, and they're like yeah, yeah, like I get it, I know, I know why you did those fucking dumb things, those crazy things, those insane things, and they're like this is why I did what I did yeah no, so like it was easy to relate to somebody at that time yeah, can I just say happy four years.
Speaker 2:
1:00:18 Sorry to cut you off, but can I just say happy four years.
Speaker 1:
1:00:20 Sorry to cut you off but can I just say happy four years, man. Oh yeah, thank you, man, thank you.
Speaker 2:
1:00:23 It was his four years when he was down here in Vancouver, so I just want to say that man.
Speaker 3:
1:00:29 Yeah, that's awesome, anthony, really.
Speaker 1:
1:00:31 Thank you.
Speaker 3:
1:00:32 Yeah, it takes an unbelievable amount of I guess what's the word I'm looking for Strength to to make that decision and stick with it. You know I used to smoke. You know, I mean, I don't know if you guys smoke or not, but I love smoking cigarettes. You know this is back when I was going to college or whatever the case is and and I quit and I'll tell you something, it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do was quit smoking. And I understand cigarettes, I get it, but talk about terrible. But going through that and quitting that and staying four years, anthony, that's amazing, do?
Speaker 1:
1:01:08 you ever find.
Speaker 3:
1:01:09 Anthony, do you ever find yourself wanting to go there again? Or I mean, is there something you follow, a guideline you follow, to make sure you never go back there, or do you think about?
Speaker 1:
1:01:27 going back there often. So I'm in a 12-step program. So, like I have a sponsor, I sponsor other men. So, like I have like a system in place and then I also attend meetings. So, like I have a group of people like-minded individuals, like I said, have a group of people, like-minded individuals, like I said, the way I put it is to make that simple decision is too fucking expensive for me. What I gave up, the price that I had to pay to give up that lifestyle that I was living is so small. Literally all I have to do now, daniel, is if someone calls me, I pick up the phone and if I'm having a hard time, I call my sponsor and then I go to meetings a few times a week. That's all I have to do to get rid of the fucking dumpster fire. That was my life before. If that's what I have to do, that's really not that big of a price to pay for me. Yeah, if I choose a decision to go the other way, I lose everything that I've worked so hard for over these last four years.
Speaker 1:
1:02:25 In terms of considering going back, the way I explain it is I have thoughts I call them fleeting thoughts and I'll tell you exactly what it is for me. Friday after work in the middle of summer, it's like fuck it, corona would be good, but the minute that pops in my head it's right back out. It's just like one of those. Oh, I don't do that anymore. You know, like we went out for Eric's birthday on Friday and like everyone was drinking and stuff and it's like I can watch them have fun because they're actually having fun doing it, whereas when I do it I do it to get completely fucking annihilated, to not have to be in my own skin. You don't operate on the premise of doing this to have fun. I'm doing this to just get fucking destroyed out of my mind. Drinking and drugs I don't do drugs like a normal person. I don't smoke a joint on a Wednesday after work. Just to calm down, I'll smoke weed. I'll go pick up a ball pack and then I'm picking up an eight ball of cocaine. That's how's how I roll.
Speaker 1:
1:03:20 So it's like for me to make that decision. I know where it leads because I tried to fucking make it different every time and it always ended up in the same place and, similar to you, like it ended me in a fucking hospital on suicide watch because I. I didn't want to fucking do it anymore and the only thing that gave me a solution and a semblance of peace was trusting other people, like-minded individuals who had been through something similar as I have. That's what I mean by the networking thing, like if you can't afford therapy and I'll be honest with you, I think therapy and the right group of people are two different things that are equally as important to have in your life.
Speaker 1:
1:03:57 I don't think you can thrive with just one. Some people may be able to, but surround yourself with like-minded individuals and get yourself into therapy. Like-minded individuals will give you the understanding that you're not alone in feeling the way that you're feeling and that people can relate to you and that you're not the only person to go through that. And therapy will help you understand what you're going through and give you some answers as to why you're going through it.
Speaker 3:
1:04:22 That's my opinion on it yeah, well, obviously it worked for you. That worked for me, I mean, it worked for you.
Speaker 1:
1:04:28 I wonder how many people it doesn't work for you know, what I mean success rate for addiction recovery in the way that I do it is 10, not even it's eight. I think it's eight%.
Speaker 3:
1:04:39 So that shows you right there.
Speaker 1:
1:04:41 Yeah.
Speaker 3:
1:04:42 Well, anthony, I, I have a, I have a funny story here. Okay, I, I went to go see a psychiatrist, you know, a couple of times, just to have somebody to speak to. Okay, and I, I will never, ever forget this scenario where I'm sitting on the couch in front of a complete stranger and we know the session starts Right and she starts asking me questions and I start answering them like brutally honest, ok, and I will never. You know, they're trained to keep a straight face, they're trained to stay calm and, ok, you know, like what's that movie? Analyze this. You know this.
Speaker 3:
1:05:22 I think this lady's face, after I told her everything I was going through, was something similar to this look, and, and, and. And. I saw that and I'm thinking, you know, I don't know if I should continue, I don't know if I should say much anymore. I saw her expression and I don't know if that was good or bad or whatever. Needless to say, I only saw her a couple of times, but it did help to speak out loud, it did help because, you know you're, you're, you're, you're close circle.
Speaker 3:
1:05:47 You know you're, you're, you're moms, your dads, your wives, girlfriends you don't really sit down and have those kinds of conversations with them. You just don't, you know. So you have it with a complete and total stranger, and that's supposed to make sense, I guess.
Speaker 2:
1:06:05 Well, it's because, because they don't know you, right, so like there's no real tie to you, so you can kind of just unload. That's why people just feel comfortable to do that yeah, and that's what my sponsor is for me.
Speaker 1:
1:06:16 He's an unbiased perspective on my life who has similar experiences as I do. And then my therapist is a medical professional who understands behaviors and emotions and traumas. You know, my sponsor is my right now guy. My therapist is my. Why am I the way I am today? Based on everything that happened in the past.
Speaker 2:
1:06:38 Yeah, I like how you line that up. You know what I mean. He's like this is my right now guy and like I like that.
Speaker 1:
1:06:46 Yeah, very well, he doesn't give a fuck dude like he, he always has. And I'm the same with the guys that I work with, like I always have their best interest in mind, but when it comes to addiction, like I tell guys like this isn't a fucking joke.
Speaker 1:
1:07:01 No, you're going to die. So I would rather sleep at night knowing that I said something that really fucking upset you, in hopes that you change, rather than trying to fucking rub your back and tell you it's going to be okay Once you go back out, relapse and fucking die and then being like shit. I wish I would have said this differently. So it's like I give a fuck, but I don't give a fuck in the way that it comes across, because that's how you need to hear it yeah it's true.
Speaker 3:
1:07:28 No, you got to be hardcore. I mean something like you have to be hardcore to them, otherwise, look, I've got a father who's had more surgeries than any human being I've ever met in the face of this planet. And the reality is the man loves his cigarettes. He used to drink, you know quite a bit, and he is 74 years old and he is a diabetic. He has already had one toe removed and he still continues to smoke like a chimney. He was just recently in six weeks of rehab I'm sorry, physical therapy, excuse me. It was six weeks of physical therapy to get antibiotics in him. So they don't have to cut off another toe because of rehab. I'm sorry, physical therapy, excuse me. It was six weeks of physical therapy to get antibiotics in them, so they don't have to cut off another toe because of diabetes, right? Well, guess what? The second he gets home, the second I bring him home, the first thing he did was light a cigarette.
Speaker 3:
1:08:12 Now, how much can you really care about a situation if that you know he doesn't want to help himself? You know, I scream at him, I yell at him. If that you know he, he doesn't want to help himself. You know I, I scream at him, I yell at him. I say you know, dad, you know what? If you continue to do this, then you're probably going to die a much sooner than you think. He doesn't care, he doesn't care. Came home, lit a cigarette. No problem, I got, I got. Only, you know, somebody packs these smokes a day. You know what I mean it's like. My point, anthony, is that I've screamed at him a million times, I've yelled at him, I have been so aggressive with him and this last time, where he had to go into the physical therapy clinic for six weeks which is not easy, you know I had to scream at him and threaten him as much as I ever had to in my life to get him to wake up and realize.
Speaker 1:
1:09:00 Yep it him as much as I ever had to in my life to get him to wake up and realize yeah, it's hard man.
Speaker 2:
1:09:04 It's the old ways too, though.
Speaker 1:
1:09:06 My dad last summer went into the hospital with his aortic valve 99% blocked. How'd he get a new valve put in? Had open heart surgery. The minute the surgery was done the doctor came in the room and said listen, you've got a new valve, but if you continue to smoke and drink, I'm going to see you a lot sooner if you make it five years. What did he do when he got home?
Speaker 1:
1:09:28 He's living like he was never in the hospital, don't get me wrong. He feels fucking a million times better than he did before, but it's just like we know where this leads. My dad's one of those guys where it's like the minute he stops moving is when it's going to get really bad. You know, as long as he stays busy and just does what he does, it's whatever. But uh, same thing. I had the conversation with him before I went in the hospital. I was like listen, like go in, do the surgery, listen to what they fucking say for seven to eight months, take their fucking advice don't smoke, don't drink. And that seven to eight months Take their fucking advice Don't smoke, don't drink, that seven to eight months of small sacrifice is going to give you another decade with your kids. You want to come out and continue doing what you're doing, that's fine, but you're not going to be around for your fucking grandkids.
Speaker 3:
1:10:12 You're just not, it's unfortunate, but you can't change people man, you can't.
Speaker 1:
1:10:18 You can love him as much as you want and think that you know what's best, but at the end of the day, it's up to them to make those decisions.
Speaker 2:
1:10:25 yep completely say you can take the horse to the water but you can't make him drink it. Well, I think we should give them the questions.
Speaker 1:
1:10:35 Questions why don't you ask them tonight?
Speaker 2:
1:10:37 because I don't have them remembered yeah, yeah, you do, come on. You know the one, okay, so we ask now two questions to our guests. First it was one, but now it's two. Fuck man, put me on the spot like this. We didn't even talk about this. What the hell is this shit? Come on, eric, no, I'm just playing. What is the definition of home to you? Is that right? I botched that, is that no? Okay, yeah.
Speaker 3:
1:11:07 Yeah, I got that answer. The definition of home to me is a place that you can actually enter and be surrounded by peace. The biggest word for a man, yeah, peace. And when he doesn't go home and see and feel peace and be in serenity, now, so to speak, it's not peace, it's not home. I like to go home, I like to feel peace, I like to be in peace, I want to be around my kids and I want to be surrounded by love.
Speaker 2:
1:11:36 That's the definition of home for me. Love it, yeah. And then the next one is if you had one message to the world, what would it be?
Speaker 3:
1:11:45 The main message that I always portray is with what I've been through personally, the most important thing that I think is never, ever quit. I could have quit a million times, I never quit, and I've been through hell we have all been through our versions of hell on this show but it's the guys that are talking with each other right now that never quit, and that is that is the gist of it all. Whether it be rehab, whether it be divorce, whether it be whatever the case may be, never quit and never allow somebody to make you quit I love it, man, I love it.
Speaker 2:
1:12:23 I just want to say thank you. Can I just?
Speaker 1:
1:12:25 yeah, can I just say you have a fucking radio voice, dude. You do this whole episode, man, like you have a fucking radio voice, like you're made for this shit.
Speaker 3:
1:12:34 Yeah, dude you know I love it. I appreciate you saying that. I just find that I love it. You know, and I am very much appreciate you guys being allowing me to be on your show, cause you, you guys are awesome. Let's be honest, and you know, I just, I just think you know the whole mental health thing and the reason that you know what caught my attention with you guys.
Speaker 3:
1:12:55 I wanted to be a part of that because you definitely are now you know, it's millions and millions and millions and millions and millions of men as we speak, right here at 903 central standard time, that are having issues as we speak, then to get that word out and get it, to get it out, it's a big deal.
Speaker 2:
1:13:17 That's why your show is awesome thanks, man, thank you, and that's what we're trying here, you know, and it's what's just raw, man, you know, what you see is what you get there. Like there is no real edit editing. We just do a little bit at the front and at the end and some vocal stuff, obviously to just tune it up, but other than that there's no like what you see is what you get. You know, we want to be authentic, you know, and show and show that you know this is, this, is the truth, this is what fucking everybody needs to see. Man Not going to hide behind a screen and read a script this is this, is it, and reloaded questions and bullshit like that we have two, but they're pretty standard.
Speaker 3:
1:13:55 Well, it's non-biased, and it's non-biased, non-censored reality, reality yeah, exactly that's all. That's what it is. That's why I love it, because if people situations, scenarios, problems are all getting out there and I'm not going to bring up any networks, blah, blah, blah. But you hear certain networks censor certain things, etc.
Speaker 2:
1:14:18 And this doesn't allow that yeah, well, we're shadow banned right now on one of the things that's live right now, but we won't go there anyways. But you know what?
Speaker 3:
1:14:27 it's because of the shit that we talk about yeah, yeah, well, god bless you guys, man, you guys are awesome so are you, man, so are you, and we'd love for you to come back too, man I think we need you to come back because we we started getting into your story and then we just got into some fucking genuine conversation.
Speaker 1:
1:14:44 There's nothing wrong with that, but I feel like there's a whole second half to your story that we never even really got to touch on yeah, maybe, maybe, maybe.
Speaker 3:
1:14:53 I'd love to come back it'd be you're.
Speaker 2:
1:14:56 You're part of the family, brother now. So yeah, well, that makes me happy yeah, and, like I said, like you, you ever need anything man like for, like the podcast stuff. You know, whatever I can help you with too, I'm here for you man. So, and vice versa, right, you, we're all a team. It takes a village, you know, and we need to work with each other to spread the word and push out all this shit. Right, yeah, we're going up against the big guys yeah, and that's the fun, yeah, and that's the fun part.
Speaker 3:
1:15:24 For me that's the fun part, because we're coming.
Speaker 2:
1:15:27 We're coming, definitely. Well, I just want to say thank you again, man. It was great. I had a great time here. I really appreciate you, and your podcast too, right.
Speaker 3:
1:15:40 Yeah, well, again, it's a pleasure, you know, eric Anthony, thanks for being so professional and kind and allowing me to tell my story.
Speaker 2:
1:15:47 Yeah, man, we love it Anytime. Well, on that note, thank you again, and I'm good if you're good brother.
Speaker 1:
1:15:56 Yeah, man, yeah, it was a great episode. We'll see you again, okay cool.
Speaker 2:
1:15:59 We'll see everybody later.
Speaker 3:
1:16:01 Take it easy, thanks for listening bye, awesome brother heck yeah yeah, I'm not sure it could have been any better no, it was perfect, that was a fucking good episode really good episode now, that was as real as it gets. We'll be right back.
