WEBVTT
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Don Quinn wrote this November 5th, 1940 NBC broadcast of
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Fibber McGee and Mollie. In episode 260, Election Day, Jim
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and Marion Jordan are Fibber and Mollie as 79 Wistful
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Vista becomes the 13th precinct polling place. The McGees serve
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as election officials with a good government club prize awaiting
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any precinct that records a perfect voter turnout. Bill Thompson,
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Isabel Randolph, and Harold Peary join the Wistful Vista proceedings.
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Broadcast on the night of the 1940 presidential election, the
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program also carries NBC return bulletins on Franklin D. Roosevelt
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and Wendell Willkie, with music from Billy Mills and his
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orchestra and the King's Men. Now, back to the golden
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age of radio.
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The Johnson Wax Program.
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The makers of Johnson's wax and Johnson's self-polishing blowcoats present
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Slipper McGee in Bali, written by Don Quinn, with music
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by the King's Men and Billy Mills in his orchestra.
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Ladies and gentlemen, realizing the tremendous interest you all have
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in the election returns tonight, NBC has arranged to bring
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you the latest results at intervals during our program.
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And now Billy Mills and his orchestra open the show
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with So You're the One.
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So You're the One.
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Thank you.
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When you walk on wax, you save your floors. You've
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heard me say this before, but I like to repeat
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it because it illustrates so clearly the protection offered by
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genuine Johnson's wax. The reason why this famous floor wax
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saves work and saves money throughout the year. When you
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apply a coat of Johnson's wax to your floors, you're
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protecting them with a tough, invisible wax shield. A shield
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that guards the finish against scratches, scars, and dirt.
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Of course, that's only half.
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The Johnson Wax story, because floors that are regularly Johnson
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Wax become more beautiful with every application. They have that rich,
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mellow glow so much desired by better housekeepers.
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Add to this the.
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100 extra uses for genuine Johnson's Wax for furniture, woodwork,
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leather goods, and you understand why it is in so
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many homes everywhere.
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You can buy genuine.
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Johnson's Wax in the familiar paste or liquid form, and
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in the new cream wax, especially formulated for furniture and woodwork.
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Buy some tomorrow.
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Thank you.
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Well, the Good Government Club of Wistful Vista has offered
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$ 250 to the election officials who bring out the voters
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in their precincts 100%. And here presiding at the polling place,
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which also happens to be their home at 79 Wistful Vista,
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we find those two eager officials, Thibber McGee and Mollick.
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Thank you.
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Well, now remember, McGee.
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What?
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As long as we're election officials, we've got to be
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absolutely nonpartisan.
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Okay, but who are we going to be nonpartisan again?
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Excuse me, please, President Kewpie. I'd like to vote.
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Why, hello, Mr. DePopolis.
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Your name, please, Nick. Nicholas Agatakis Prometheus G. DePopolis.
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Oh, what's the G stand for?
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Junior. Then you've got the same name as your old man.
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Oh, no.
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Papa's name is being Nicholas Agatakis Prometheus Seed, Papa. Oh,
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what's the C for?
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Senior. Okay, okay, let it go. Here's your ballad, Nick.
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Mark it in the other room, then fold it and
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put it in this little box right here. Harkily, darkly, Peter.
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But if I'd only known it was this much trouble
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to elect the President of the United States, it's certainly
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worth it, isn't it? Imagine giving a dumb bell like
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him the vote, Molly.
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Well, the first time you voted, you weren't so smart either, dearie.
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Why, what did I do? You took a ruler and
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a pair of scissors with you.
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What?
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You said as long as you were going to split
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your ticket, you wanted it to look neat.
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That was before I knew, huh?
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I'll get it. Okay.
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Hello?
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Yes?
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13th Precinct, polling place. Judge McGee speaking. No.
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No, we ain't allowed to give out any information. No,
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we don't know how the voting is going for any candidate. No. Oh, well,
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you'll just have to wait for the morning press, I guess.
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Yeah.
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Okay, Mr. Gallop.
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Was that George Gallop?
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No, Charlie, a fellow I used to know in the circus.
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Oh, okay.
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He used to play the cantaloupe in the parade. No,
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you don't mean cantaloupe.
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You mean he played the calamity.
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Molly, a calamity is something bad.
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Well, I never heard one played good. One what? One
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of those steam pianos, those antelopes.
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That's right.
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They ain't antelopes.
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Antelopes are kind of dear.
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I don't care how much they cost. I don't like it.
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And for your information, dearie, a cantaloupe.
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Is a marshmallow.
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Of course it's a marshmallow, and I know that.
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Well, how could anyone play a marshmallow in a circus?
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Charlie did. The board holds into it and played it
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like a sweet potato. It was a little drippy, but
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it had rhythm. Never forget one time we played Mishawaka, Indiana,
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and Charlie couldn't find a cantaloupe for loving her money.
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Had to use a persimmon. Yeah, he played the parade
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all right, but his face was so puckered up he
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couldn't get near nobody for three weeks. Everybody thought he
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was going to kiss him. Well, to the following week
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we were.
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McGee, you know what you can get me for Christmas?
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No, what?
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A big, beautifully colored, handsomely framed Rand McNally map of
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that dream world you live in. Now let's get back
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to work here.
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Okay, okay, okay. How many more votes do we need
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to get 100% turnout?
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About 22.
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22?
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Hey, that's pretty good.
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Only 22 more, huh? Well, looks like we might win
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that $ 250, Molly. Gee, wouldn't that be great? I wonder
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how the election's coming on in other parts of the country.
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Well, search me.
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Shall I turn on the radio?
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Well, I was going to turn it on myself, and
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then I got worried.
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What were you worried about?
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Well, that radio of ours is so old, I was
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afraid we'd get returns from the Coolidge campaign.
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Well, let's try it.
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I'll get the NBC newsroom in New York. Quiet in
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the polling place, please. We're going to get some election returns.
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Here are the last-minute election returns.
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Roosevelt has taken an early lead in the presidential election
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on the basis of incomplete returns which have now come
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in from the South, the East, and a.
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Part of the Midwest.
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The NBC election totalizer board here in New York now
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shows these figures.
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Roosevelt, 2,605,000. Wilkie, 2,037,000. This represents approximately 9% of the
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total votes cast today.
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Roosevelt is holding a narrow lead in the important states
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of Ohio, Indiana, Pennsylvania, and Illinois, and also in Connecticut.
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Returns from New York, which represents 47 electoral.
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Votes, are just beginning to come in.
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And here are bulletins from various states as they're coming
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into the NBC newsroom.
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New York, the first election district reporting.
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Tonight of 804 in Bronx County, home of Democratic National
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Chairman Edward Flynn. Tonight gave Wilkie 420 to 400 for Roosevelt.
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Rome, New York.
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Roosevelt defeated Wilkie 7,345 to 6,563 in the city of
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Rome in an unofficial tabulation of votes in the first
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upstate city reported complete in today's election.
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Cleveland, Ohio.
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The Cleveland plane dealer, which supported Wendell Wilkie, predicted tonight.
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That President Roosevelt would carry Ohio by 150,000 votes.
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Here is a bullet. Washington at 9.30 p.m. With returns
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far from complete, Roosevelt was leading in states having a
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total electoral vote of 277, as follows. Alabama, Arkansas, Connecticut, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Massachusetts, Mississippi,
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North Dakota, New Hampshire, New Mexico, North Carolina, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania,
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South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Virginia, and West Virginia. Wilkie was
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leading in states with an aggregate electoral vote of 179,
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as follows. Arizona, Colorado, Delaware, Kansas, Maine, Michigan, Missouri, Nebraska,
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New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Vermont, Wisconsin.
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Keep tuned into this. for further election returns. Yes, sir.
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Now we return you to Fever McGee in Mali as
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Billy Mills and his orchestra play Bojangles of Harlem.
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Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
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Well, how does it look, Molly? Are we going to
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turn in a 100% vote in this precinct?
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I believe we are, McGee. Oh, there's only a few more.
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Hey, Mr. McGee, how old you got to be to vote?
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21, Flanagan.
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Gee, that's great.
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I'll bring me son over right away. But, Mr.
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Flanagan, I thought your son was only 16.
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He is. But he's heard so many campaign speeches, he's
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85 years.
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It's wonderful what radio has done for.
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Politics, isn't it, dear?
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Yeah, it is. Used to be a speaker had to
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get up on a stump to talk. Now they stand
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in front of a mic and get themselves out on
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a limb. How do you do, Mr.
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McGee?
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Hi, Mr. McGee.
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Does one do one's.
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Voting in here?
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Yes, one does, Mrs.
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Uppington.
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Will one step up.
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To the desk, please?
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Raise your right hand, Duffy. Oh, must I be sworn in? No,
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but that dress is so tight, I just wondered if
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you could do it. Okay, let it down. Now then,
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a few questions, Uppy, please. Your name?
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Uppington.
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Mrs.
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Abigail Uppington.
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Resident?
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Succo.
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Succo.
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Oh, and your house is brick. I thought so, too,
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until I paid for it. Huh?
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Then I realized I got suckled.
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Oh, how I got suckled.
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Oh, my.
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That's a very old joke, Mrs.
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Uppy.
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It's a very old house. Uppy, you're hotter than a
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short order kitchen tonight, you know. You ought to save
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that material.
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Indefinitely.
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I intend to, Miss McGee.
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You know, I expect to write someday.
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Oh, and you'll love it too, Duffy. I remember when
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I learned to write.
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The teacher says to me.
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Please, Miss McGee.
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Enough of this.
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My ballot, please.
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Just a moment, Mrs.
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Uppington.
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Your age, please. I am 50... I mean, um, oh,
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this is just a over 21. Oh, now, Uppy, not you.
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Yes, really, I am, Mr.
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McGee.
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Don't say I did that.
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No, no, I realize I have the faith of a
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young girl.
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Well, you'd better give it back to her.
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You're getting it all wrinkled.
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Well, really, now, I.
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Oh, my ballot, please.
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And where do I go?
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Oh, here you are, Ruppie.
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And just go through that door there, Ruppie. You'll find the.
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No, no, no, not that door.
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No, no, no.
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No!
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No! Hey, Molly.
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Yeah? After election, remind me to straighten out that closet.
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Did you see Mrs. Uppington get out of there?
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Lovely footwork.
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Yeah, she's a little lightweight, sure. Hey, what on earth
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is that?
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Look, somebody's making a speech out there.
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Oh, he can't do that. He's electioneering within a hundred
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00:14:42.850 --> 00:14:45.129
feet of a polling place. I'll put a stop to that.
254
00:14:45.149 --> 00:14:45.970
Come on, Molly.
255
00:14:48.070 --> 00:14:48.230
Hey!
256
00:14:53.000 --> 00:14:58.590
Say, my friends, that Johnson's self-polishing glow coat should be
257
00:14:58.649 --> 00:15:02.129
elected to office. And not only to the office, but
258
00:15:02.149 --> 00:15:05.929
to the whole. Because it saves hours of housework.
259
00:15:05.649 --> 00:15:10.149
And is so easy to use.
260
00:15:10.190 --> 00:15:12.649
Glow coat requires no rubbing and no buffing.
261
00:15:13.090 --> 00:15:15.549
And gives new luster and beauty.
262
00:15:15.309 --> 00:15:17.330
To your kitchen linoleum.
263
00:15:17.350 --> 00:15:17.570
Hooray!
264
00:15:20.759 --> 00:15:25.009
That is why I say, vote for Johnson's self-polishing glow coat,
265
00:15:25.149 --> 00:15:28.110
regardless of party. And if you must have a party,
266
00:15:28.210 --> 00:15:30.940
be sure and use glow coat, because all good parties.
267
00:15:30.659 --> 00:15:31.879
Wind up in the kitchen.
268
00:15:31.899 --> 00:15:31.970
Woo!
269
00:15:39.230 --> 00:15:41.970
I think I'm going to start carrying smelling salts with me, Molly.
270
00:15:42.649 --> 00:15:43.240
What for?
271
00:15:43.340 --> 00:15:45.580
Someday Wilcox is going to forget that tricky stuff and
272
00:15:45.600 --> 00:15:48.279
simply say, folks, now I'm going to talk about Johnson's
273
00:15:48.320 --> 00:15:51.159
glow coat. And when he does that, I'll faint.
274
00:15:52.320 --> 00:15:54.840
Never mind that, McGee. If we want to win that prize,
275
00:15:54.860 --> 00:15:56.879
we better get some of these voters in here. Why
276
00:15:56.899 --> 00:15:58.019
don't you call some of them up?
277
00:15:58.250 --> 00:16:00.629
Hey, that's a great idea, Molly. Give me the phone, thanks.
278
00:16:01.169 --> 00:16:01.450
Thanks.
279
00:16:02.029 --> 00:16:04.389
Hello, operator?
280
00:16:04.570 --> 00:16:04.870
Give me the.
281
00:16:04.950 --> 00:16:12.200
Oh, is that you, Mert? No. How's every little thing, Mert? Good, huh?
282
00:16:12.799 --> 00:16:13.019
Who?
283
00:16:13.860 --> 00:16:14.379
Your sister.
284
00:16:15.580 --> 00:16:16.320
Chopped off her what?
285
00:16:16.720 --> 00:16:18.320
Oh, 70 days, McGee.
286
00:16:18.340 --> 00:16:20.600
What happened? Mert's sister was singing the old oaken bucket
287
00:16:20.639 --> 00:16:22.480
at the radio station, and they chopped off eight bars
288
00:16:22.519 --> 00:16:23.059
off her chorus.
289
00:16:23.080 --> 00:16:23.539
What say, Mert?
290
00:16:29.649 --> 00:16:31.750
Oh, our line is out of order, huh? Okay, Mert.
291
00:16:32.009 --> 00:16:33.809
Thanks anyway. Can you imagine that?
292
00:16:33.850 --> 00:16:35.669
Well, there's still time for the rest of the work.
293
00:16:35.690 --> 00:16:36.070
Hello, Johnny.
294
00:16:36.129 --> 00:16:37.649
Hello, daughter. Give me a ballot.
295
00:16:37.809 --> 00:16:38.950
Well, okay, old-timer.
296
00:16:38.970 --> 00:16:39.389
Here you are.
297
00:16:39.620 --> 00:16:42.139
A few questions first, though. Here's where we find out
298
00:16:42.179 --> 00:16:44.259
how old this fellow, what his real name is, Molly.
299
00:16:44.299 --> 00:16:45.720
Yes, yes. Name, please.
300
00:16:46.120 --> 00:16:46.360
Okay.
301
00:16:48.799 --> 00:16:51.379
Okay, old-timer, come on, come on. What's your name? Wouldn't
302
00:16:51.399 --> 00:16:52.179
Tame ask me again?
303
00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:53.019
I'll tell you the same.
304
00:16:53.639 --> 00:16:56.490
For goodness sake, don't be so coy, Mr.
305
00:16:56.509 --> 00:16:57.009
Old-timer.
306
00:16:57.289 --> 00:16:59.710
If you don't answer the questions, you can't vote, you know.
307
00:16:59.850 --> 00:17:01.330
Oh, but darn it, daughter.
308
00:17:01.350 --> 00:17:03.809
Why have I got to give you all this information?
309
00:17:03.909 --> 00:17:06.809
To make your vote legal, old-timer. How do you know
310
00:17:06.910 --> 00:17:07.869
it's legal, Johnny?
311
00:17:08.190 --> 00:17:09.150
Who, me? Yeah.
312
00:17:09.990 --> 00:17:12.039
I've been in politics since I was knee-high to a
313
00:17:12.059 --> 00:17:16.700
ward healer, old-timer. Committeeman, alderman, mayor. Why, when I was
314
00:17:16.759 --> 00:17:19.609
prosecuting attorney, lawyers from all over the country used to
315
00:17:19.640 --> 00:17:22.069
say my pleas to the jury were the prettiest they
316
00:17:22.109 --> 00:17:25.710
ever heard. Pretty please, McGee, I was notified you were there.
317
00:17:28.069 --> 00:17:31.029
Pretty Please McGee, proclaimed by Preston Public, the fearless prosecutor
318
00:17:31.049 --> 00:17:35.329
of pilfering pickpockets, political parasites, and perfidious persons performing petty peccadilloes,
319
00:17:35.690 --> 00:17:38.490
putting prison pajamas on poker players, preying on poor punks
320
00:17:38.519 --> 00:17:42.259
with peculiar pasteboards, and purloining property with prestidigitation, leading with
321
00:17:42.299 --> 00:17:44.799
passion and pathos for poor people in pretty pickles, a
322
00:17:44.839 --> 00:17:47.420
puppy personality with a capital P, but here's more returns
323
00:17:47.460 --> 00:17:48.099
from NBC.
324
00:17:50.059 --> 00:17:53.180
Incomplete election returns are now available from 40 of the
325
00:17:53.180 --> 00:17:56.910
48 states. And on a basis of these incomplete returns,
326
00:17:57.009 --> 00:18:00.730
President Roosevelt is leading Wendell Wilkie in both the popular
327
00:18:00.809 --> 00:18:05.049
and the indicated electoral vote. States having 277 electoral votes
328
00:18:05.190 --> 00:18:09.869
are leaning toward Roosevelt. Wilkie is holding a lead in
329
00:18:09.930 --> 00:18:12.700
states with an aggregate electoral vote of 179. The NBC
330
00:18:12.740 --> 00:18:18.680
election chart now shows 2,820,909 for Roosevelt, 2,229,322 for Wilkie,
331
00:18:18.700 --> 00:18:20.509
with 10% of the total returns in. These are accurate
332
00:18:20.569 --> 00:18:21.710
figures based on new services.
333
00:18:34.099 --> 00:18:35.220
Manchester, New Hampshire.
334
00:18:35.700 --> 00:18:39.029
A neck-and-neck battle for New Hampshire's poor electoral votes developed
335
00:18:39.069 --> 00:18:42.789
tonight as early returns trickled in from scattered communities in
336
00:18:42.809 --> 00:18:46.289
the Granite State, which four years ago staged the tightest
337
00:18:46.329 --> 00:18:50.069
finish in the nation in that presidential race. Returns from
338
00:18:50.069 --> 00:18:52.170
53 of the state's 294 precincts gave President Roosevelt 9,564
339
00:18:52.170 --> 00:18:53.789
votes for 9,312 for Wendell Wilkie.
340
00:19:02.990 --> 00:19:03.490
Pittsburgh.
341
00:19:03.809 --> 00:19:07.130
President Roosevelt held an unofficial lead of 35,968 votes in
342
00:19:07.190 --> 00:19:09.269
Pennsylvania tonight, with 332 of the state's 8,100 precincts reported.
343
00:19:09.289 --> 00:19:12.509
The vote. Roosevelt, 149,460. Wilkie, 113,492.
344
00:19:24.359 --> 00:19:27.180
New York, the first five election districts to report from
345
00:19:27.220 --> 00:19:30.660
New York County tonight gave Roosevelt 2,080, Wilkie 441. Albany,
346
00:19:30.680 --> 00:19:33.240
New York, nine districts out of 212 in Albany County
347
00:19:33.259 --> 00:19:37.259
give Roosevelt 3,141, Wilkie 975. Minneapolis, Wendell L. Wilkie led
348
00:19:37.319 --> 00:19:40.089
President Roosevelt in the first representation.
349
00:19:40.089 --> 00:19:40.230
3,141.
350
00:19:40.230 --> 00:19:40.730
Wilkie, 975.
351
00:19:40.730 --> 00:19:41.440
Minneapolis. Wendell L.
352
00:19:41.430 --> 00:19:45.109
Wilkie led President Roosevelt in the first returns from.
353
00:19:46.279 --> 00:19:46.480
Minnesota.
354
00:19:46.500 --> 00:19:49.440
The Republican nominee getting 250 votes to Mr. Roosevelt's 170
355
00:19:49.440 --> 00:19:52.039
in one precinct out of 3,696.
356
00:20:00.359 --> 00:20:03.299
Des Moines, Iowa. The first three precincts.
357
00:20:02.880 --> 00:20:07.910
To report in Iowa in the presidential race gave Wendell
358
00:20:08.009 --> 00:20:12.670
Wilkie 1,102 votes to 762 for President Roosevelt. The returns
359
00:20:12.690 --> 00:20:15.529
were from Grundy County, which had a Democratic majority in 1936.
360
00:20:15.529 --> 00:20:18.579
Keep tuned to this station.
361
00:20:19.099 --> 00:20:21.220
Now we return you to Fibber McGee and Malley as
362
00:20:21.259 --> 00:20:23.480
the King's men sing You Can't Tell a Man by
363
00:20:23.519 --> 00:20:32.160
His Heart. Oh, once upon a time before the world
364
00:20:32.200 --> 00:20:34.400
had gone informal, things were normal and a.
365
00:20:34.339 --> 00:20:35.500
Girl could figure out.
366
00:20:36.900 --> 00:20:39.920
By a man's fedora or his top hat or his panel,
367
00:20:40.029 --> 00:20:41.420
exactly what the band.
368
00:20:41.210 --> 00:20:41.970
Was all about.
369
00:20:42.029 --> 00:20:46.609
Bankers were conservative in black or brown or blue or gray.
370
00:20:46.829 --> 00:20:50.450
Actors were extravagant in green or something distangé. You could
371
00:20:50.529 --> 00:20:53.309
always recognize a Carrie Strait from Pool Room Guys, but
372
00:20:53.349 --> 00:20:55.210
now just look what's happened to the scene.
373
00:20:58.950 --> 00:21:01.660
And oh, and oh, what is this world coming to?
374
00:21:01.799 --> 00:21:05.000
Oh, oh, oh, we're still losing earlaps.
375
00:21:04.700 --> 00:21:06.200
And crooks in police caps.
376
00:21:06.259 --> 00:21:09.680
The day of discretion is through.
377
00:21:09.720 --> 00:21:13.750
There was a time when you could tell a cowboy
378
00:21:13.809 --> 00:21:16.470
by his ten-gallon list.
379
00:21:16.529 --> 00:21:18.930
But every dude has got a headpiece now.
380
00:21:18.990 --> 00:21:21.390
Boy, just like Billy the Kid.
381
00:21:22.430 --> 00:21:25.839
Now meanies wear beanies and Bing wears an old thing
382
00:21:25.900 --> 00:21:27.980
like something dragged in by the cops.
383
00:21:29.460 --> 00:21:32.490
That distinguished beaver may be Jolson's mammy.
384
00:21:32.670 --> 00:21:36.089
Or next year's version of Uncle Sammy.
385
00:21:36.170 --> 00:21:39.569
You can't tell a man by his hat.
386
00:21:39.690 --> 00:21:43.650
Escorts and sailors and people in trailers are all wearing
387
00:21:43.710 --> 00:21:47.839
coppers and spats. That man in the pink beret may
388
00:21:47.880 --> 00:21:52.700
be none other than Wallace Beery, or Whistler's mother.
389
00:21:52.740 --> 00:21:54.619
You can't tell a man by his hat.
390
00:21:58.630 --> 00:22:00.190
Can't tell a man, can't tell a man, can't tell
391
00:22:00.329 --> 00:22:01.089
a man by.
392
00:22:00.869 --> 00:22:13.710
The style of his hair.
393
00:22:13.769 --> 00:22:14.170
I see.
394
00:22:14.230 --> 00:22:16.970
Well, oh, okay there, bud. I just pulled your belt
395
00:22:17.099 --> 00:22:19.779
and slipped it into the ballot box there.
396
00:22:19.859 --> 00:22:22.319
You mean this great big box right here, Mr.
397
00:22:22.380 --> 00:22:22.599
McGee?
398
00:22:23.000 --> 00:22:23.740
Now, that's the one.
399
00:22:23.900 --> 00:22:25.279
Thank you, sir.
400
00:22:27.940 --> 00:22:28.599
You too, madam.
401
00:22:28.819 --> 00:22:32.099
Oh, I'm so thrilled, really. It's the first time I
402
00:22:32.220 --> 00:22:34.539
ever voted, and I'm such an admirer of the man.
403
00:22:34.460 --> 00:22:35.220
I voted for.
404
00:22:35.420 --> 00:22:38.960
I put some extra X's on the bottom of my ballot. Kisses,
405
00:22:39.279 --> 00:22:39.799
you know.
406
00:22:40.240 --> 00:22:44.599
Well, looks like we're going to win that prize, Molly.
407
00:22:44.900 --> 00:22:46.359
Three more people come in the boat, and we can
408
00:22:46.400 --> 00:22:48.220
close the book. Oh, there.
409
00:22:48.369 --> 00:22:49.200
Good day, my dear.
410
00:22:49.220 --> 00:22:50.589
Good day to you, big face.
411
00:22:51.769 --> 00:22:54.390
Give me a ballot, please. Okay, here you are, Boomer.
412
00:22:54.710 --> 00:22:56.309
And be careful how you mark it.
413
00:22:56.430 --> 00:22:59.450
Certainly will, my dear. Can't betray the confidence of the
414
00:22:59.490 --> 00:23:05.869
people who bought my vote. Now, let's see. Where I
415
00:23:06.230 --> 00:23:10.519
put those instructions. Instructions, instructions. Had them here just a
416
00:23:10.539 --> 00:23:14.859
moment ago. Here's a deck of marked cards. Gonna play
417
00:23:14.880 --> 00:23:19.799
a little rummy tonight, if he shows up. Letter from
418
00:23:19.839 --> 00:23:23.579
my dear old father from Vinegar, South Dakota. Says he
419
00:23:23.599 --> 00:23:26.440
takes his morning constitutional by walking 50.
420
00:23:26.059 --> 00:23:27.400
Times around the jail.
421
00:23:28.259 --> 00:23:29.059
Yes, yes.
422
00:23:29.599 --> 00:23:32.220
Round and round the vinegar jug pop goes.
423
00:23:32.859 --> 00:23:33.519
The weasel.
424
00:23:36.920 --> 00:23:38.289
Oh, yes.
425
00:23:38.329 --> 00:23:41.490
A couple of badly made counterfeit silver dollars. Caused me
426
00:23:41.509 --> 00:23:44.150
a great deal of embarrassment. Got a letter from the
427
00:23:44.210 --> 00:23:46.329
government telling me I'd have to get the lead out.
428
00:23:51.170 --> 00:23:52.930
And a check for a short beer.
429
00:23:52.950 --> 00:23:55.470
Well, well, imagine that.
430
00:23:55.509 --> 00:23:56.470
No instructions.
431
00:23:56.509 --> 00:24:00.250
Well, you will just have to mark your ballot without them, Mr.
432
00:24:00.309 --> 00:24:00.690
Boomer.
433
00:24:00.910 --> 00:24:02.210
Right in the other room there.
434
00:24:02.369 --> 00:24:03.450
Thank you, my dear.
435
00:24:03.490 --> 00:24:06.599
Thank you. Hope there's no objection to my voting twice
436
00:24:06.650 --> 00:24:09.259
in each square. Never could resist a chance for a
437
00:24:09.279 --> 00:24:09.900
double cross.
438
00:24:17.750 --> 00:24:20.049
That guy's been on so many police blotters, he writes
439
00:24:20.089 --> 00:24:23.180
his name backward. Well, I'm glad he came in to
440
00:24:23.200 --> 00:24:26.619
vote anyway. Only two more and we've won $ 250. Only
441
00:24:26.660 --> 00:24:30.180
two more, Molly. I'll bet we're the only precinct in
442
00:24:30.200 --> 00:24:32.700
the United States that voted 100%.
443
00:24:32.700 --> 00:24:38.009
I lived in one once that voted 425%. It was
444
00:24:38.049 --> 00:24:39.710
a wet neighborhood and we had a bunch of floaters.
445
00:24:42.220 --> 00:24:43.220
Oh, hi, McGee.
446
00:24:43.259 --> 00:24:43.700
Hello, Mrs.
447
00:24:43.779 --> 00:24:44.079
McGee.
448
00:24:44.180 --> 00:24:44.740
Hello, Mr.
449
00:24:44.920 --> 00:24:45.500
Gildersleeve.
450
00:24:45.539 --> 00:24:46.619
Come right in. Yeah.
451
00:24:46.839 --> 00:24:47.799
Hi, Gildersleeve.
452
00:24:47.900 --> 00:24:48.569
Glad to see you.
453
00:24:49.289 --> 00:24:50.289
What'd you come in here for?
454
00:24:50.650 --> 00:24:51.069
To vote.
455
00:24:51.089 --> 00:24:51.730
Fine.
456
00:24:51.809 --> 00:24:52.349
Here's the ballot.
457
00:24:52.390 --> 00:24:52.970
Here's the pencil.
458
00:24:53.170 --> 00:24:54.650
Just take it in the next room.
459
00:24:54.789 --> 00:24:57.569
Now, wait a minute.
460
00:24:57.630 --> 00:24:59.009
Don't rush me.
461
00:24:59.589 --> 00:25:01.150
Well, shucks, Gildy. You got a vote.
462
00:25:01.250 --> 00:25:03.990
Who says I got a vote? I'm an American citizen, McGee.
463
00:25:04.279 --> 00:25:05.279
Nobody can make me vote.
464
00:25:05.619 --> 00:25:06.859
Well, then what'd you come in here for?
465
00:25:06.900 --> 00:25:07.319
To vote.
466
00:25:07.359 --> 00:25:07.640
Good.
467
00:25:07.859 --> 00:25:08.500
Here's the ballot.
468
00:25:08.839 --> 00:25:09.400
Oh, no, you don't.
469
00:25:09.420 --> 00:25:10.480
You can't rush me into this.
470
00:25:11.819 --> 00:25:14.619
Rush you into this. Now look, Gilder, as one American
471
00:25:14.660 --> 00:25:15.180
to another.
472
00:25:15.619 --> 00:25:17.259
I appeal to your patriotism.
473
00:25:17.700 --> 00:25:18.940
I appeal to your... Don't you.
474
00:25:18.859 --> 00:25:21.980
Wave the flag at me either, McGee. My forefathers were
475
00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:24.789
in this country long before yours. Oh, is that so?
476
00:25:24.829 --> 00:25:25.420
Yes, it is.
477
00:25:25.960 --> 00:25:27.829
My mother had 12 sisters in the D.A.R.
478
00:25:27.970 --> 00:25:29.910
Well, I knew you had aunts, Gildersleeve, but I didn't
479
00:25:29.930 --> 00:25:30.690
know what they were in.
480
00:25:30.710 --> 00:25:43.529
You're a hard man, McGee. Just for that, I won't vote.
481
00:25:44.509 --> 00:25:46.150
Oh, dear, oh, dear.
482
00:25:46.170 --> 00:25:48.369
You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Mr.
483
00:25:48.390 --> 00:25:49.630
Gildersleeve, not voting.
484
00:25:49.730 --> 00:25:50.210
Well.
485
00:25:50.380 --> 00:25:52.400
Why, your wife was the first one in when we
486
00:25:52.440 --> 00:25:53.480
opened up this morning.
487
00:25:53.500 --> 00:25:54.700
What? She was?
488
00:25:54.740 --> 00:25:55.460
You bet she was.
489
00:25:55.480 --> 00:25:57.339
Why, she's voting for a different candidate than I am.
490
00:25:57.660 --> 00:25:58.619
She can't do this to me.
491
00:25:58.759 --> 00:25:59.279
Give me a ballot.
492
00:25:59.400 --> 00:25:59.619
Here.
493
00:25:59.859 --> 00:26:00.799
Give me a pencil.
494
00:26:01.019 --> 00:26:01.440
Here.
495
00:26:01.539 --> 00:26:07.650
President X, X, X, X, X, Congressman X, Judge Municipal X.
496
00:26:07.670 --> 00:26:09.789
Here, here, here. Make it in the other room and
497
00:26:09.829 --> 00:26:10.049
mark it.
498
00:26:10.049 --> 00:26:10.990
It's all marked in the box.
499
00:26:11.690 --> 00:26:17.859
I'll show Madam Gildersleeve. Well, many happy returns, folks.
500
00:26:26.980 --> 00:26:30.059
Many happy returns. Of all the corny.
501
00:26:30.380 --> 00:26:31.619
Oh, heavenly days, McGee.
502
00:26:31.640 --> 00:26:31.819
Look.
503
00:26:32.019 --> 00:26:32.180
Huh?
504
00:26:32.339 --> 00:26:34.220
Look what time it is. We have to close the
505
00:26:34.240 --> 00:26:35.559
polls in exactly two minutes.
506
00:26:35.759 --> 00:26:36.440
Oh, but we can't.
507
00:26:36.740 --> 00:26:38.240
There's still one voter that ain't come in.
508
00:26:38.279 --> 00:26:40.720
Nevertheless, we'll have to close. We've got to keep it legal,
509
00:26:40.779 --> 00:26:41.119
you know.
510
00:26:41.140 --> 00:26:42.380
Oh, but he can't do that to us.
511
00:26:42.660 --> 00:26:44.480
He's cheating us out of 250 bucks.
512
00:26:45.140 --> 00:26:46.099
Oh, come on, bud.
513
00:26:46.380 --> 00:26:48.259
Whoever you are.
514
00:26:48.299 --> 00:26:49.140
That rat of luck.
515
00:26:49.500 --> 00:26:54.099
If he don't show up within two minutes, we're... Ah, say.
516
00:26:55.049 --> 00:26:55.369
Good.
517
00:26:55.289 --> 00:26:56.410
Evening to the both of you.
518
00:26:56.930 --> 00:26:58.809
And a very good evening to you, sir.
519
00:26:59.049 --> 00:27:00.630
Hurry, McGee. Here you are, bud.
520
00:27:00.950 --> 00:27:01.950
We'll just skip the questions.
521
00:27:02.170 --> 00:27:03.789
You only got a minute to make out your ballot.
522
00:27:04.109 --> 00:27:04.710
Me what?
523
00:27:05.049 --> 00:27:06.789
Your ballot. Don't stand there and argue.
524
00:27:06.829 --> 00:27:07.309
Hurry up.
525
00:27:07.730 --> 00:27:09.589
The voting booth is in the other room. We'll check
526
00:27:09.609 --> 00:27:10.869
your registration afterwards.
527
00:27:10.930 --> 00:27:12.769
I'm not here to vote, McCusker.
528
00:27:13.349 --> 00:27:14.549
I'm from the city hall.
529
00:27:15.009 --> 00:27:19.400
Come to take your ballot card. The polls are closed.
530
00:27:19.839 --> 00:27:20.480
Good night to you.
531
00:27:26.279 --> 00:27:29.319
Well, I didn't want a new green automobile with red
532
00:27:29.380 --> 00:27:30.160
upholstery and the.
533
00:27:30.099 --> 00:27:32.619
Top goes up and down when you press the button anyway.
534
00:27:32.740 --> 00:27:36.200
Oh, McGee, darling, don't take it to heart, so.
535
00:27:36.420 --> 00:27:36.539
I.
536
00:27:37.599 --> 00:27:38.500
I can't help it, Molly.
537
00:27:38.519 --> 00:27:42.809
Oh, now, now, just because some stupid, short-sighted, irresponsible, un-American
538
00:27:42.869 --> 00:27:44.130
rapscallion forgot to vote.
539
00:27:44.150 --> 00:27:47.049
Please, Molly, don't talk like that. He ain't really a
540
00:27:47.069 --> 00:27:47.609
bad guy.
541
00:27:47.630 --> 00:27:48.049
What?
542
00:27:48.369 --> 00:27:49.829
You know who it was? Yes.
543
00:27:50.009 --> 00:27:50.289
Who?
544
00:27:51.170 --> 00:27:51.839
Me. Me.
545
00:27:59.029 --> 00:28:01.640
A small talent for one thing or another, painting or
546
00:28:01.680 --> 00:28:04.859
music or even amateur theatricals. We might occasionally do something
547
00:28:04.880 --> 00:28:07.500
that seems brilliant, but the next effort might be very ordinary.
548
00:28:07.940 --> 00:28:10.519
And that marks the main difference between talent and genius.
549
00:28:11.019 --> 00:28:13.119
For with the artist who has genius, every effort is
550
00:28:13.180 --> 00:28:14.220
brilliant and surefire.
551
00:28:14.660 --> 00:28:15.859
It's that way in business, too.
552
00:28:16.099 --> 00:28:18.970
Some products are here today, gone tomorrow. Whereas others are
553
00:28:18.990 --> 00:28:21.910
so consistent in quality and service that they become accepted
554
00:28:21.950 --> 00:28:25.349
as household standards. The many products of S.C. Johnson &
555
00:28:25.349 --> 00:28:29.180
Son Incorporated, makers of Johnson's Wax, are surely in this category.
556
00:28:29.559 --> 00:28:32.799
For more than 50 years, they have been giving unfailing satisfaction.
557
00:28:33.279 --> 00:28:36.279
When you think of polishes, think of genuine Johnson's Wax
558
00:28:36.319 --> 00:28:39.240
in the familiar paste or liquid form for floors, and
559
00:28:39.289 --> 00:28:42.609
the new cream wax for furniture, or Johnson's self-polishing glow
560
00:28:42.650 --> 00:28:47.230
coat for linoleum, Johnson's shine-up silver polish, and Johnson's car.
561
00:28:46.990 --> 00:28:47.950
New for your car.
562
00:28:52.529 --> 00:28:55.400
Let's go to the Bijoux Theater, McGee. They're giving election
563
00:28:55.440 --> 00:28:56.500
returns during the show.
564
00:28:56.700 --> 00:28:57.819
Oh, just like us, huh?
565
00:28:57.980 --> 00:29:00.119
Exactly. That's why I wanted to go. What do you mean?
566
00:29:00.160 --> 00:29:00.599
What's there?
567
00:29:00.880 --> 00:29:03.140
Election returns and no time for comedy.
568
00:29:03.960 --> 00:29:05.420
Oh. Good night.
569
00:29:05.519 --> 00:29:06.329
Good night, all.
570
00:29:06.349 --> 00:29:13.130
This is Harlow Wilcox, speaking for the makers of Johnson's.
571
00:29:12.869 --> 00:29:16.089
Wax and Johnson's Self-Polishing Glow Coat, inviting you to be.
572
00:29:15.950 --> 00:29:17.509
With us again next Tuesday night.
573
00:29:17.579 --> 00:29:17.990
Good night.
574
00:29:22.170 --> 00:29:23.329
Attention car owners.
575
00:29:23.630 --> 00:29:27.200
What product does two things at once? It's Johnson's Car New,
576
00:29:27.220 --> 00:29:30.720
the sensational new auto polish that both cleans and wax
577
00:29:30.759 --> 00:29:34.220
polishes your car in one easy operation. It used to
578
00:29:34.289 --> 00:29:36.509
take hard work and cost real money to do those
579
00:29:36.549 --> 00:29:39.349
two jobs, but with Car New, you can do them
580
00:29:39.410 --> 00:29:42.099
in half the time. Car new is a liquid that
581
00:29:42.180 --> 00:29:45.259
dries to a white powder. Wipe this powder off, and
582
00:29:45.299 --> 00:29:48.619
you'll say with car owners everywhere, your car looks like
583
00:29:48.700 --> 00:29:51.609
new when you use car new. Buy a can tomorrow.
584
00:29:51.690 --> 00:29:52.890
Get your car.
585
00:29:52.609 --> 00:29:53.269
Ready for winter.
586
00:29:53.589 --> 00:29:55.369
This is the National Broadcasting Company.
587
00:30:01.250 --> 00:30:05.190
That concludes Fibber McGee and Mollie, Election Day. Follow Fibber
588
00:30:05.210 --> 00:30:07.460
McGee and Mollie for more classic broadcasts.
1
00:00:00.150 --> 00:00:04.370
Don Quinn wrote this November 5th, 1940 NBC broadcast of
2
00:00:04.450 --> 00:00:09.580
Fibber McGee and Mollie. In episode 260, Election Day, Jim
3
00:00:09.619 --> 00:00:13.380
and Marion Jordan are Fibber and Mollie as 79 Wistful
4
00:00:13.439 --> 00:00:18.000
Vista becomes the 13th precinct polling place. The McGees serve
5
00:00:18.039 --> 00:00:21.519
as election officials with a good government club prize awaiting
6
00:00:21.579 --> 00:00:25.750
any precinct that records a perfect voter turnout. Bill Thompson,
7
00:00:26.199 --> 00:00:30.750
Isabel Randolph, and Harold Peary join the Wistful Vista proceedings.
8
00:00:31.589 --> 00:00:35.509
Broadcast on the night of the 1940 presidential election, the
9
00:00:35.549 --> 00:00:40.270
program also carries NBC return bulletins on Franklin D. Roosevelt
10
00:00:40.590 --> 00:00:44.049
and Wendell Willkie, with music from Billy Mills and his
11
00:00:44.130 --> 00:00:48.429
orchestra and the King's Men. Now, back to the golden
12
00:00:48.549 --> 00:00:49.369
age of radio.
13
00:00:50.329 --> 00:00:51.700
The Johnson Wax Program.
14
00:00:59.570 --> 00:01:03.049
The makers of Johnson's wax and Johnson's self-polishing blowcoats present
15
00:01:03.109 --> 00:01:06.019
Slipper McGee in Bali, written by Don Quinn, with music
16
00:01:06.060 --> 00:01:07.959
by the King's Men and Billy Mills in his orchestra.
17
00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.920
Ladies and gentlemen, realizing the tremendous interest you all have
18
00:01:10.959 --> 00:01:14.000
in the election returns tonight, NBC has arranged to bring
19
00:01:14.019 --> 00:01:16.359
you the latest results at intervals during our program.
20
00:01:16.879 --> 00:01:18.659
And now Billy Mills and his orchestra open the show
21
00:01:18.700 --> 00:01:19.810
with So You're the One.
22
00:01:20.609 --> 00:01:22.689
So You're the One.
23
00:01:38.329 --> 00:01:38.560
Thank you.
24
00:01:49.599 --> 00:01:52.540
When you walk on wax, you save your floors. You've
25
00:01:52.560 --> 00:01:54.480
heard me say this before, but I like to repeat
26
00:01:54.540 --> 00:01:57.519
it because it illustrates so clearly the protection offered by
27
00:01:57.620 --> 00:02:00.939
genuine Johnson's wax. The reason why this famous floor wax
28
00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:03.780
saves work and saves money throughout the year. When you
29
00:02:03.840 --> 00:02:06.329
apply a coat of Johnson's wax to your floors, you're
30
00:02:06.359 --> 00:02:09.750
protecting them with a tough, invisible wax shield. A shield
31
00:02:09.789 --> 00:02:12.590
that guards the finish against scratches, scars, and dirt.
32
00:02:13.270 --> 00:02:14.509
Of course, that's only half.
33
00:02:14.289 --> 00:02:17.270
The Johnson Wax story, because floors that are regularly Johnson
34
00:02:17.289 --> 00:02:20.909
Wax become more beautiful with every application. They have that rich,
35
00:02:21.009 --> 00:02:23.650
mellow glow so much desired by better housekeepers.
36
00:02:24.349 --> 00:02:25.430
Add to this the.
37
00:02:25.150 --> 00:02:29.090
100 extra uses for genuine Johnson's Wax for furniture, woodwork,
38
00:02:29.150 --> 00:02:32.069
leather goods, and you understand why it is in so
39
00:02:32.110 --> 00:02:33.229
many homes everywhere.
40
00:02:33.729 --> 00:02:34.949
You can buy genuine.
41
00:02:34.629 --> 00:02:37.770
Johnson's Wax in the familiar paste or liquid form, and
42
00:02:37.830 --> 00:02:41.449
in the new cream wax, especially formulated for furniture and woodwork.
43
00:02:41.830 --> 00:02:42.569
Buy some tomorrow.
44
00:02:45.069 --> 00:02:45.439
Thank you.
45
00:03:07.960 --> 00:03:11.780
Well, the Good Government Club of Wistful Vista has offered
46
00:03:11.780 --> 00:03:15.240
$ 250 to the election officials who bring out the voters
47
00:03:15.300 --> 00:03:19.770
in their precincts 100%. And here presiding at the polling place,
48
00:03:19.849 --> 00:03:23.150
which also happens to be their home at 79 Wistful Vista,
49
00:03:23.590 --> 00:03:28.000
we find those two eager officials, Thibber McGee and Mollick.
50
00:03:28.009 --> 00:03:28.250
Thank you.
51
00:03:34.490 --> 00:03:37.669
Well, now remember, McGee.
52
00:03:37.710 --> 00:03:37.990
What?
53
00:03:38.009 --> 00:03:40.110
As long as we're election officials, we've got to be
54
00:03:40.189 --> 00:03:41.810
absolutely nonpartisan.
55
00:03:41.900 --> 00:03:44.340
Okay, but who are we going to be nonpartisan again?
56
00:03:44.360 --> 00:03:48.039
Excuse me, please, President Kewpie. I'd like to vote.
57
00:03:48.060 --> 00:03:49.340
Why, hello, Mr. DePopolis.
58
00:03:49.460 --> 00:03:53.270
Your name, please, Nick. Nicholas Agatakis Prometheus G. DePopolis.
59
00:03:54.039 --> 00:03:55.919
Oh, what's the G stand for?
60
00:03:56.340 --> 00:04:02.159
Junior. Then you've got the same name as your old man.
61
00:04:02.740 --> 00:04:02.960
Oh, no.
62
00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:07.530
Papa's name is being Nicholas Agatakis Prometheus Seed, Papa. Oh,
63
00:04:07.830 --> 00:04:08.610
what's the C for?
64
00:04:08.889 --> 00:04:15.310
Senior. Okay, okay, let it go. Here's your ballad, Nick.
65
00:04:16.300 --> 00:04:17.660
Mark it in the other room, then fold it and
66
00:04:17.680 --> 00:04:20.000
put it in this little box right here. Harkily, darkly, Peter.
67
00:04:20.379 --> 00:04:22.379
But if I'd only known it was this much trouble
68
00:04:22.399 --> 00:04:25.279
to elect the President of the United States, it's certainly
69
00:04:25.300 --> 00:04:34.319
worth it, isn't it? Imagine giving a dumb bell like
70
00:04:34.360 --> 00:04:35.459
him the vote, Molly.
71
00:04:35.620 --> 00:04:38.300
Well, the first time you voted, you weren't so smart either, dearie.
72
00:04:38.339 --> 00:04:40.579
Why, what did I do? You took a ruler and
73
00:04:40.620 --> 00:04:41.639
a pair of scissors with you.
74
00:04:41.680 --> 00:04:42.079
What?
75
00:04:42.240 --> 00:04:43.800
You said as long as you were going to split
76
00:04:43.819 --> 00:04:45.410
your ticket, you wanted it to look neat.
77
00:04:48.649 --> 00:04:50.490
That was before I knew, huh?
78
00:04:51.069 --> 00:04:52.069
I'll get it. Okay.
79
00:04:52.769 --> 00:04:53.269
Hello?
80
00:04:54.189 --> 00:04:54.589
Yes?
81
00:04:55.649 --> 00:05:00.180
13th Precinct, polling place. Judge McGee speaking. No.
82
00:05:02.019 --> 00:05:05.480
No, we ain't allowed to give out any information. No,
83
00:05:05.500 --> 00:05:10.759
we don't know how the voting is going for any candidate. No. Oh, well,
84
00:05:11.160 --> 00:05:13.730
you'll just have to wait for the morning press, I guess.
85
00:05:14.430 --> 00:05:14.949
Yeah.
86
00:05:15.629 --> 00:05:16.790
Okay, Mr. Gallop.
87
00:05:26.329 --> 00:05:27.610
Was that George Gallop?
88
00:05:28.649 --> 00:05:30.420
No, Charlie, a fellow I used to know in the circus.
89
00:05:30.439 --> 00:05:30.740
Oh, okay.
90
00:05:32.430 --> 00:05:34.689
He used to play the cantaloupe in the parade. No,
91
00:05:34.730 --> 00:05:35.750
you don't mean cantaloupe.
92
00:05:35.790 --> 00:05:39.100
You mean he played the calamity.
93
00:05:39.360 --> 00:05:41.259
Molly, a calamity is something bad.
94
00:05:41.319 --> 00:05:45.139
Well, I never heard one played good. One what? One
95
00:05:45.180 --> 00:05:47.060
of those steam pianos, those antelopes.
96
00:05:47.560 --> 00:05:49.529
That's right.
97
00:05:49.550 --> 00:05:50.350
They ain't antelopes.
98
00:05:50.470 --> 00:05:51.610
Antelopes are kind of dear.
99
00:05:52.009 --> 00:05:54.290
I don't care how much they cost. I don't like it.
100
00:05:55.680 --> 00:05:58.660
And for your information, dearie, a cantaloupe.
101
00:05:58.199 --> 00:05:58.920
Is a marshmallow.
102
00:05:59.040 --> 00:06:00.839
Of course it's a marshmallow, and I know that.
103
00:06:00.879 --> 00:06:03.199
Well, how could anyone play a marshmallow in a circus?
104
00:06:04.189 --> 00:06:09.990
Charlie did. The board holds into it and played it
105
00:06:10.029 --> 00:06:13.189
like a sweet potato. It was a little drippy, but
106
00:06:13.240 --> 00:06:21.579
it had rhythm. Never forget one time we played Mishawaka, Indiana,
107
00:06:21.819 --> 00:06:23.819
and Charlie couldn't find a cantaloupe for loving her money.
108
00:06:24.319 --> 00:06:27.860
Had to use a persimmon. Yeah, he played the parade
109
00:06:27.939 --> 00:06:29.620
all right, but his face was so puckered up he
110
00:06:29.639 --> 00:06:32.930
couldn't get near nobody for three weeks. Everybody thought he
111
00:06:32.949 --> 00:06:36.389
was going to kiss him. Well, to the following week
112
00:06:36.430 --> 00:06:36.730
we were.
113
00:06:36.769 --> 00:06:39.470
McGee, you know what you can get me for Christmas?
114
00:06:39.689 --> 00:06:40.089
No, what?
115
00:06:40.610 --> 00:06:44.310
A big, beautifully colored, handsomely framed Rand McNally map of
116
00:06:44.329 --> 00:06:48.430
that dream world you live in. Now let's get back
117
00:06:48.449 --> 00:06:49.029
to work here.
118
00:06:49.129 --> 00:06:51.180
Okay, okay, okay. How many more votes do we need
119
00:06:51.189 --> 00:06:52.240
to get 100% turnout?
120
00:06:52.300 --> 00:06:52.569
About 22.
121
00:06:52.550 --> 00:06:52.620
22?
122
00:06:52.600 --> 00:06:53.899
Hey, that's pretty good.
123
00:06:53.959 --> 00:06:58.089
Only 22 more, huh? Well, looks like we might win
124
00:06:58.110 --> 00:07:01.089
that $ 250, Molly. Gee, wouldn't that be great? I wonder
125
00:07:01.129 --> 00:07:03.009
how the election's coming on in other parts of the country.
126
00:07:03.029 --> 00:07:03.649
Well, search me.
127
00:07:03.970 --> 00:07:05.089
Shall I turn on the radio?
128
00:07:05.110 --> 00:07:06.790
Well, I was going to turn it on myself, and
129
00:07:06.810 --> 00:07:07.569
then I got worried.
130
00:07:07.589 --> 00:07:08.449
What were you worried about?
131
00:07:08.629 --> 00:07:10.529
Well, that radio of ours is so old, I was
132
00:07:10.589 --> 00:07:12.889
afraid we'd get returns from the Coolidge campaign.
133
00:07:19.660 --> 00:07:20.319
Well, let's try it.
134
00:07:20.339 --> 00:07:22.980
I'll get the NBC newsroom in New York. Quiet in
135
00:07:23.019 --> 00:07:26.060
the polling place, please. We're going to get some election returns.
136
00:07:27.810 --> 00:07:29.579
Here are the last-minute election returns.
137
00:07:30.199 --> 00:07:33.160
Roosevelt has taken an early lead in the presidential election
138
00:07:33.699 --> 00:07:36.399
on the basis of incomplete returns which have now come
139
00:07:36.420 --> 00:07:38.540
in from the South, the East, and a.
140
00:07:38.560 --> 00:07:39.560
Part of the Midwest.
141
00:07:40.319 --> 00:07:43.939
The NBC election totalizer board here in New York now
142
00:07:44.019 --> 00:07:45.040
shows these figures.
143
00:07:45.750 --> 00:07:48.610
Roosevelt, 2,605,000. Wilkie, 2,037,000. This represents approximately 9% of the
144
00:07:48.629 --> 00:07:50.449
total votes cast today.
145
00:07:58.019 --> 00:08:00.759
Roosevelt is holding a narrow lead in the important states
146
00:08:00.779 --> 00:08:05.819
of Ohio, Indiana, Pennsylvania, and Illinois, and also in Connecticut.
147
00:08:06.579 --> 00:08:10.800
Returns from New York, which represents 47 electoral.
148
00:08:10.060 --> 00:08:11.680
Votes, are just beginning to come in.
149
00:08:12.500 --> 00:08:15.399
And here are bulletins from various states as they're coming
150
00:08:15.439 --> 00:08:16.959
into the NBC newsroom.
151
00:08:17.800 --> 00:08:21.000
New York, the first election district reporting.
152
00:08:20.639 --> 00:08:25.310
Tonight of 804 in Bronx County, home of Democratic National
153
00:08:25.350 --> 00:08:28.370
Chairman Edward Flynn. Tonight gave Wilkie 420 to 400 for Roosevelt.
154
00:08:28.389 --> 00:08:28.850
Rome, New York.
155
00:08:28.870 --> 00:08:30.490
Roosevelt defeated Wilkie 7,345 to 6,563 in the city of
156
00:08:30.509 --> 00:08:32.990
Rome in an unofficial tabulation of votes in the first
157
00:08:33.809 --> 00:08:35.590
upstate city reported complete in today's election.
158
00:08:35.690 --> 00:08:36.250
Cleveland, Ohio.
159
00:08:51.009 --> 00:08:55.440
The Cleveland plane dealer, which supported Wendell Wilkie, predicted tonight.
160
00:08:55.100 --> 00:08:57.980
That President Roosevelt would carry Ohio by 150,000 votes.
161
00:08:58.080 --> 00:09:06.009
Here is a bullet. Washington at 9.30 p.m. With returns
162
00:09:06.110 --> 00:09:09.490
far from complete, Roosevelt was leading in states having a
163
00:09:09.529 --> 00:09:24.710
total electoral vote of 277, as follows. Alabama, Arkansas, Connecticut, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Massachusetts, Mississippi,
164
00:09:24.950 --> 00:09:31.350
North Dakota, New Hampshire, New Mexico, North Carolina, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania,
165
00:09:31.629 --> 00:09:37.350
South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Virginia, and West Virginia. Wilkie was
166
00:09:37.389 --> 00:09:40.450
leading in states with an aggregate electoral vote of 179,
167
00:09:40.429 --> 00:09:51.299
as follows. Arizona, Colorado, Delaware, Kansas, Maine, Michigan, Missouri, Nebraska,
168
00:09:51.559 --> 00:09:58.090
New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Vermont, Wisconsin.
169
00:09:58.789 --> 00:10:02.269
Keep tuned into this. for further election returns. Yes, sir.
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Now we return you to Fever McGee in Mali as
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00:10:05.190 --> 00:10:07.809
Billy Mills and his orchestra play Bojangles of Harlem.
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00:10:31.580 --> 00:11:33.690
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
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00:11:46.960 --> 00:11:48.659
Well, how does it look, Molly? Are we going to
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turn in a 100% vote in this precinct?
175
00:11:50.490 --> 00:11:53.250
I believe we are, McGee. Oh, there's only a few more.
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00:11:53.289 --> 00:11:55.929
Hey, Mr. McGee, how old you got to be to vote?
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00:11:55.929 --> 00:11:56.629
21, Flanagan.
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00:11:56.710 --> 00:11:57.509
Gee, that's great.
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00:11:57.710 --> 00:11:59.669
I'll bring me son over right away. But, Mr.
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Flanagan, I thought your son was only 16.
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00:12:01.169 --> 00:12:04.309
He is. But he's heard so many campaign speeches, he's
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85 years.
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00:12:09.450 --> 00:12:11.230
It's wonderful what radio has done for.
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Politics, isn't it, dear?
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00:12:12.169 --> 00:12:13.610
Yeah, it is. Used to be a speaker had to
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00:12:13.629 --> 00:12:15.309
get up on a stump to talk. Now they stand
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00:12:15.370 --> 00:12:16.870
in front of a mic and get themselves out on
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00:12:16.929 --> 00:12:21.470
a limb. How do you do, Mr.
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00:12:21.610 --> 00:12:22.389
McGee?
190
00:12:22.429 --> 00:12:23.149
Hi, Mr. McGee.
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00:12:23.909 --> 00:12:25.149
Does one do one's.
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00:12:25.049 --> 00:12:26.190
Voting in here?
193
00:12:26.490 --> 00:12:27.610
Yes, one does, Mrs.
194
00:12:27.669 --> 00:12:28.090
Uppington.
195
00:12:28.710 --> 00:12:29.570
Will one step up.
196
00:12:29.509 --> 00:12:30.350
To the desk, please?
197
00:12:31.649 --> 00:12:35.620
Raise your right hand, Duffy. Oh, must I be sworn in? No,
198
00:12:35.649 --> 00:12:37.299
but that dress is so tight, I just wondered if
199
00:12:37.340 --> 00:12:43.299
you could do it. Okay, let it down. Now then,
200
00:12:43.330 --> 00:12:45.309
a few questions, Uppy, please. Your name?
201
00:12:45.750 --> 00:12:46.230
Uppington.
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00:12:46.509 --> 00:12:46.870
Mrs.
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00:12:47.009 --> 00:12:47.950
Abigail Uppington.
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Resident?
205
00:12:48.799 --> 00:12:49.539
Succo.
206
00:12:49.559 --> 00:12:49.779
Succo.
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00:12:51.009 --> 00:12:53.389
Oh, and your house is brick. I thought so, too,
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00:12:53.429 --> 00:12:54.629
until I paid for it. Huh?
209
00:12:54.769 --> 00:12:56.470
Then I realized I got suckled.
210
00:12:57.149 --> 00:12:59.870
Oh, how I got suckled.
211
00:12:59.990 --> 00:13:00.289
Oh, my.
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00:13:00.429 --> 00:13:02.210
That's a very old joke, Mrs.
213
00:13:02.309 --> 00:13:02.570
Uppy.
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00:13:02.629 --> 00:13:07.399
It's a very old house. Uppy, you're hotter than a
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00:13:07.440 --> 00:13:10.159
short order kitchen tonight, you know. You ought to save
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00:13:10.259 --> 00:13:10.940
that material.
217
00:13:11.960 --> 00:13:12.720
Indefinitely.
218
00:13:14.700 --> 00:13:16.059
I intend to, Miss McGee.
219
00:13:16.279 --> 00:13:18.960
You know, I expect to write someday.
220
00:13:19.500 --> 00:13:22.269
Oh, and you'll love it too, Duffy. I remember when
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00:13:22.330 --> 00:13:23.049
I learned to write.
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The teacher says to me.
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00:13:24.029 --> 00:13:26.429
Please, Miss McGee.
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00:13:26.870 --> 00:13:27.710
Enough of this.
225
00:13:28.049 --> 00:13:29.429
My ballot, please.
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00:13:29.480 --> 00:13:30.320
Just a moment, Mrs.
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Uppington.
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00:13:30.980 --> 00:13:34.879
Your age, please. I am 50... I mean, um, oh,
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00:13:35.120 --> 00:13:41.080
this is just a over 21. Oh, now, Uppy, not you.
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00:13:41.220 --> 00:13:42.759
Yes, really, I am, Mr.
231
00:13:42.879 --> 00:13:43.070
McGee.
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00:13:43.090 --> 00:13:43.830
Don't say I did that.
233
00:13:43.850 --> 00:13:47.549
No, no, I realize I have the faith of a
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00:13:47.570 --> 00:13:48.289
young girl.
235
00:13:48.309 --> 00:13:50.490
Well, you'd better give it back to her.
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00:13:50.509 --> 00:13:51.649
You're getting it all wrinkled.
237
00:13:58.139 --> 00:13:59.320
Well, really, now, I.
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Oh, my ballot, please.
239
00:14:01.679 --> 00:14:02.779
And where do I go?
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00:14:02.899 --> 00:14:03.580
Oh, here you are, Ruppie.
241
00:14:03.600 --> 00:14:05.820
And just go through that door there, Ruppie. You'll find the.
242
00:14:05.840 --> 00:14:07.240
No, no, no, not that door.
243
00:14:07.360 --> 00:14:08.379
No, no, no.
244
00:14:08.679 --> 00:14:08.799
No!
245
00:14:08.970 --> 00:14:24.169
No! Hey, Molly.
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00:14:24.210 --> 00:14:27.840
Yeah? After election, remind me to straighten out that closet.
247
00:14:30.100 --> 00:14:32.820
Did you see Mrs. Uppington get out of there?
248
00:14:33.120 --> 00:14:33.879
Lovely footwork.
249
00:14:34.019 --> 00:14:37.610
Yeah, she's a little lightweight, sure. Hey, what on earth
250
00:14:37.679 --> 00:14:38.070
is that?
251
00:14:38.500 --> 00:14:40.230
Look, somebody's making a speech out there.
252
00:14:40.289 --> 00:14:42.809
Oh, he can't do that. He's electioneering within a hundred
253
00:14:42.850 --> 00:14:45.129
feet of a polling place. I'll put a stop to that.
254
00:14:45.149 --> 00:14:45.970
Come on, Molly.
255
00:14:48.070 --> 00:14:48.230
Hey!
256
00:14:53.000 --> 00:14:58.590
Say, my friends, that Johnson's self-polishing glow coat should be
257
00:14:58.649 --> 00:15:02.129
elected to office. And not only to the office, but
258
00:15:02.149 --> 00:15:05.929
to the whole. Because it saves hours of housework.
259
00:15:05.649 --> 00:15:10.149
And is so easy to use.
260
00:15:10.190 --> 00:15:12.649
Glow coat requires no rubbing and no buffing.
261
00:15:13.090 --> 00:15:15.549
And gives new luster and beauty.
262
00:15:15.309 --> 00:15:17.330
To your kitchen linoleum.
263
00:15:17.350 --> 00:15:17.570
Hooray!
264
00:15:20.759 --> 00:15:25.009
That is why I say, vote for Johnson's self-polishing glow coat,
265
00:15:25.149 --> 00:15:28.110
regardless of party. And if you must have a party,
266
00:15:28.210 --> 00:15:30.940
be sure and use glow coat, because all good parties.
267
00:15:30.659 --> 00:15:31.879
Wind up in the kitchen.
268
00:15:31.899 --> 00:15:31.970
Woo!
269
00:15:39.230 --> 00:15:41.970
I think I'm going to start carrying smelling salts with me, Molly.
270
00:15:42.649 --> 00:15:43.240
What for?
271
00:15:43.340 --> 00:15:45.580
Someday Wilcox is going to forget that tricky stuff and
272
00:15:45.600 --> 00:15:48.279
simply say, folks, now I'm going to talk about Johnson's
273
00:15:48.320 --> 00:15:51.159
glow coat. And when he does that, I'll faint.
274
00:15:52.320 --> 00:15:54.840
Never mind that, McGee. If we want to win that prize,
275
00:15:54.860 --> 00:15:56.879
we better get some of these voters in here. Why
276
00:15:56.899 --> 00:15:58.019
don't you call some of them up?
277
00:15:58.250 --> 00:16:00.629
Hey, that's a great idea, Molly. Give me the phone, thanks.
278
00:16:01.169 --> 00:16:01.450
Thanks.
279
00:16:02.029 --> 00:16:04.389
Hello, operator?
280
00:16:04.570 --> 00:16:04.870
Give me the.
281
00:16:04.950 --> 00:16:12.200
Oh, is that you, Mert? No. How's every little thing, Mert? Good, huh?
282
00:16:12.799 --> 00:16:13.019
Who?
283
00:16:13.860 --> 00:16:14.379
Your sister.
284
00:16:15.580 --> 00:16:16.320
Chopped off her what?
285
00:16:16.720 --> 00:16:18.320
Oh, 70 days, McGee.
286
00:16:18.340 --> 00:16:20.600
What happened? Mert's sister was singing the old oaken bucket
287
00:16:20.639 --> 00:16:22.480
at the radio station, and they chopped off eight bars
288
00:16:22.519 --> 00:16:23.059
off her chorus.
289
00:16:23.080 --> 00:16:23.539
What say, Mert?
290
00:16:29.649 --> 00:16:31.750
Oh, our line is out of order, huh? Okay, Mert.
291
00:16:32.009 --> 00:16:33.809
Thanks anyway. Can you imagine that?
292
00:16:33.850 --> 00:16:35.669
Well, there's still time for the rest of the work.
293
00:16:35.690 --> 00:16:36.070
Hello, Johnny.
294
00:16:36.129 --> 00:16:37.649
Hello, daughter. Give me a ballot.
295
00:16:37.809 --> 00:16:38.950
Well, okay, old-timer.
296
00:16:38.970 --> 00:16:39.389
Here you are.
297
00:16:39.620 --> 00:16:42.139
A few questions first, though. Here's where we find out
298
00:16:42.179 --> 00:16:44.259
how old this fellow, what his real name is, Molly.
299
00:16:44.299 --> 00:16:45.720
Yes, yes. Name, please.
300
00:16:46.120 --> 00:16:46.360
Okay.
301
00:16:48.799 --> 00:16:51.379
Okay, old-timer, come on, come on. What's your name? Wouldn't
302
00:16:51.399 --> 00:16:52.179
Tame ask me again?
303
00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:53.019
I'll tell you the same.
304
00:16:53.639 --> 00:16:56.490
For goodness sake, don't be so coy, Mr.
305
00:16:56.509 --> 00:16:57.009
Old-timer.
306
00:16:57.289 --> 00:16:59.710
If you don't answer the questions, you can't vote, you know.
307
00:16:59.850 --> 00:17:01.330
Oh, but darn it, daughter.
308
00:17:01.350 --> 00:17:03.809
Why have I got to give you all this information?
309
00:17:03.909 --> 00:17:06.809
To make your vote legal, old-timer. How do you know
310
00:17:06.910 --> 00:17:07.869
it's legal, Johnny?
311
00:17:08.190 --> 00:17:09.150
Who, me? Yeah.
312
00:17:09.990 --> 00:17:12.039
I've been in politics since I was knee-high to a
313
00:17:12.059 --> 00:17:16.700
ward healer, old-timer. Committeeman, alderman, mayor. Why, when I was
314
00:17:16.759 --> 00:17:19.609
prosecuting attorney, lawyers from all over the country used to
315
00:17:19.640 --> 00:17:22.069
say my pleas to the jury were the prettiest they
316
00:17:22.109 --> 00:17:25.710
ever heard. Pretty please, McGee, I was notified you were there.
317
00:17:28.069 --> 00:17:31.029
Pretty Please McGee, proclaimed by Preston Public, the fearless prosecutor
318
00:17:31.049 --> 00:17:35.329
of pilfering pickpockets, political parasites, and perfidious persons performing petty peccadilloes,
319
00:17:35.690 --> 00:17:38.490
putting prison pajamas on poker players, preying on poor punks
320
00:17:38.519 --> 00:17:42.259
with peculiar pasteboards, and purloining property with prestidigitation, leading with
321
00:17:42.299 --> 00:17:44.799
passion and pathos for poor people in pretty pickles, a
322
00:17:44.839 --> 00:17:47.420
puppy personality with a capital P, but here's more returns
323
00:17:47.460 --> 00:17:48.099
from NBC.
324
00:17:50.059 --> 00:17:53.180
Incomplete election returns are now available from 40 of the
325
00:17:53.180 --> 00:17:56.910
48 states. And on a basis of these incomplete returns,
326
00:17:57.009 --> 00:18:00.730
President Roosevelt is leading Wendell Wilkie in both the popular
327
00:18:00.809 --> 00:18:05.049
and the indicated electoral vote. States having 277 electoral votes
328
00:18:05.190 --> 00:18:09.869
are leaning toward Roosevelt. Wilkie is holding a lead in
329
00:18:09.930 --> 00:18:12.700
states with an aggregate electoral vote of 179. The NBC
330
00:18:12.740 --> 00:18:18.680
election chart now shows 2,820,909 for Roosevelt, 2,229,322 for Wilkie,
331
00:18:18.700 --> 00:18:20.509
with 10% of the total returns in. These are accurate
332
00:18:20.569 --> 00:18:21.710
figures based on new services.
333
00:18:34.099 --> 00:18:35.220
Manchester, New Hampshire.
334
00:18:35.700 --> 00:18:39.029
A neck-and-neck battle for New Hampshire's poor electoral votes developed
335
00:18:39.069 --> 00:18:42.789
tonight as early returns trickled in from scattered communities in
336
00:18:42.809 --> 00:18:46.289
the Granite State, which four years ago staged the tightest
337
00:18:46.329 --> 00:18:50.069
finish in the nation in that presidential race. Returns from
338
00:18:50.069 --> 00:18:52.170
53 of the state's 294 precincts gave President Roosevelt 9,564
339
00:18:52.170 --> 00:18:53.789
votes for 9,312 for Wendell Wilkie.
340
00:19:02.990 --> 00:19:03.490
Pittsburgh.
341
00:19:03.809 --> 00:19:07.130
President Roosevelt held an unofficial lead of 35,968 votes in
342
00:19:07.190 --> 00:19:09.269
Pennsylvania tonight, with 332 of the state's 8,100 precincts reported.
343
00:19:09.289 --> 00:19:12.509
The vote. Roosevelt, 149,460. Wilkie, 113,492.
344
00:19:24.359 --> 00:19:27.180
New York, the first five election districts to report from
345
00:19:27.220 --> 00:19:30.660
New York County tonight gave Roosevelt 2,080, Wilkie 441. Albany,
346
00:19:30.680 --> 00:19:33.240
New York, nine districts out of 212 in Albany County
347
00:19:33.259 --> 00:19:37.259
give Roosevelt 3,141, Wilkie 975. Minneapolis, Wendell L. Wilkie led
348
00:19:37.319 --> 00:19:40.089
President Roosevelt in the first representation.
349
00:19:40.089 --> 00:19:40.230
3,141.
350
00:19:40.230 --> 00:19:40.730
Wilkie, 975.
351
00:19:40.730 --> 00:19:41.440
Minneapolis. Wendell L.
352
00:19:41.430 --> 00:19:45.109
Wilkie led President Roosevelt in the first returns from.
353
00:19:46.279 --> 00:19:46.480
Minnesota.
354
00:19:46.500 --> 00:19:49.440
The Republican nominee getting 250 votes to Mr. Roosevelt's 170
355
00:19:49.440 --> 00:19:52.039
in one precinct out of 3,696.
356
00:20:00.359 --> 00:20:03.299
Des Moines, Iowa. The first three precincts.
357
00:20:02.880 --> 00:20:07.910
To report in Iowa in the presidential race gave Wendell
358
00:20:08.009 --> 00:20:12.670
Wilkie 1,102 votes to 762 for President Roosevelt. The returns
359
00:20:12.690 --> 00:20:15.529
were from Grundy County, which had a Democratic majority in 1936.
360
00:20:15.529 --> 00:20:18.579
Keep tuned to this station.
361
00:20:19.099 --> 00:20:21.220
Now we return you to Fibber McGee and Malley as
362
00:20:21.259 --> 00:20:23.480
the King's men sing You Can't Tell a Man by
363
00:20:23.519 --> 00:20:32.160
His Heart. Oh, once upon a time before the world
364
00:20:32.200 --> 00:20:34.400
had gone informal, things were normal and a.
365
00:20:34.339 --> 00:20:35.500
Girl could figure out.
366
00:20:36.900 --> 00:20:39.920
By a man's fedora or his top hat or his panel,
367
00:20:40.029 --> 00:20:41.420
exactly what the band.
368
00:20:41.210 --> 00:20:41.970
Was all about.
369
00:20:42.029 --> 00:20:46.609
Bankers were conservative in black or brown or blue or gray.
370
00:20:46.829 --> 00:20:50.450
Actors were extravagant in green or something distangé. You could
371
00:20:50.529 --> 00:20:53.309
always recognize a Carrie Strait from Pool Room Guys, but
372
00:20:53.349 --> 00:20:55.210
now just look what's happened to the scene.
373
00:20:58.950 --> 00:21:01.660
And oh, and oh, what is this world coming to?
374
00:21:01.799 --> 00:21:05.000
Oh, oh, oh, we're still losing earlaps.
375
00:21:04.700 --> 00:21:06.200
And crooks in police caps.
376
00:21:06.259 --> 00:21:09.680
The day of discretion is through.
377
00:21:09.720 --> 00:21:13.750
There was a time when you could tell a cowboy
378
00:21:13.809 --> 00:21:16.470
by his ten-gallon list.
379
00:21:16.529 --> 00:21:18.930
But every dude has got a headpiece now.
380
00:21:18.990 --> 00:21:21.390
Boy, just like Billy the Kid.
381
00:21:22.430 --> 00:21:25.839
Now meanies wear beanies and Bing wears an old thing
382
00:21:25.900 --> 00:21:27.980
like something dragged in by the cops.
383
00:21:29.460 --> 00:21:32.490
That distinguished beaver may be Jolson's mammy.
384
00:21:32.670 --> 00:21:36.089
Or next year's version of Uncle Sammy.
385
00:21:36.170 --> 00:21:39.569
You can't tell a man by his hat.
386
00:21:39.690 --> 00:21:43.650
Escorts and sailors and people in trailers are all wearing
387
00:21:43.710 --> 00:21:47.839
coppers and spats. That man in the pink beret may
388
00:21:47.880 --> 00:21:52.700
be none other than Wallace Beery, or Whistler's mother.
389
00:21:52.740 --> 00:21:54.619
You can't tell a man by his hat.
390
00:21:58.630 --> 00:22:00.190
Can't tell a man, can't tell a man, can't tell
391
00:22:00.329 --> 00:22:01.089
a man by.
392
00:22:00.869 --> 00:22:13.710
The style of his hair.
393
00:22:13.769 --> 00:22:14.170
I see.
394
00:22:14.230 --> 00:22:16.970
Well, oh, okay there, bud. I just pulled your belt
395
00:22:17.099 --> 00:22:19.779
and slipped it into the ballot box there.
396
00:22:19.859 --> 00:22:22.319
You mean this great big box right here, Mr.
397
00:22:22.380 --> 00:22:22.599
McGee?
398
00:22:23.000 --> 00:22:23.740
Now, that's the one.
399
00:22:23.900 --> 00:22:25.279
Thank you, sir.
400
00:22:27.940 --> 00:22:28.599
You too, madam.
401
00:22:28.819 --> 00:22:32.099
Oh, I'm so thrilled, really. It's the first time I
402
00:22:32.220 --> 00:22:34.539
ever voted, and I'm such an admirer of the man.
403
00:22:34.460 --> 00:22:35.220
I voted for.
404
00:22:35.420 --> 00:22:38.960
I put some extra X's on the bottom of my ballot. Kisses,
405
00:22:39.279 --> 00:22:39.799
you know.
406
00:22:40.240 --> 00:22:44.599
Well, looks like we're going to win that prize, Molly.
407
00:22:44.900 --> 00:22:46.359
Three more people come in the boat, and we can
408
00:22:46.400 --> 00:22:48.220
close the book. Oh, there.
409
00:22:48.369 --> 00:22:49.200
Good day, my dear.
410
00:22:49.220 --> 00:22:50.589
Good day to you, big face.
411
00:22:51.769 --> 00:22:54.390
Give me a ballot, please. Okay, here you are, Boomer.
412
00:22:54.710 --> 00:22:56.309
And be careful how you mark it.
413
00:22:56.430 --> 00:22:59.450
Certainly will, my dear. Can't betray the confidence of the
414
00:22:59.490 --> 00:23:05.869
people who bought my vote. Now, let's see. Where I
415
00:23:06.230 --> 00:23:10.519
put those instructions. Instructions, instructions. Had them here just a
416
00:23:10.539 --> 00:23:14.859
moment ago. Here's a deck of marked cards. Gonna play
417
00:23:14.880 --> 00:23:19.799
a little rummy tonight, if he shows up. Letter from
418
00:23:19.839 --> 00:23:23.579
my dear old father from Vinegar, South Dakota. Says he
419
00:23:23.599 --> 00:23:26.440
takes his morning constitutional by walking 50.
420
00:23:26.059 --> 00:23:27.400
Times around the jail.
421
00:23:28.259 --> 00:23:29.059
Yes, yes.
422
00:23:29.599 --> 00:23:32.220
Round and round the vinegar jug pop goes.
423
00:23:32.859 --> 00:23:33.519
The weasel.
424
00:23:36.920 --> 00:23:38.289
Oh, yes.
425
00:23:38.329 --> 00:23:41.490
A couple of badly made counterfeit silver dollars. Caused me
426
00:23:41.509 --> 00:23:44.150
a great deal of embarrassment. Got a letter from the
427
00:23:44.210 --> 00:23:46.329
government telling me I'd have to get the lead out.
428
00:23:51.170 --> 00:23:52.930
And a check for a short beer.
429
00:23:52.950 --> 00:23:55.470
Well, well, imagine that.
430
00:23:55.509 --> 00:23:56.470
No instructions.
431
00:23:56.509 --> 00:24:00.250
Well, you will just have to mark your ballot without them, Mr.
432
00:24:00.309 --> 00:24:00.690
Boomer.
433
00:24:00.910 --> 00:24:02.210
Right in the other room there.
434
00:24:02.369 --> 00:24:03.450
Thank you, my dear.
435
00:24:03.490 --> 00:24:06.599
Thank you. Hope there's no objection to my voting twice
436
00:24:06.650 --> 00:24:09.259
in each square. Never could resist a chance for a
437
00:24:09.279 --> 00:24:09.900
double cross.
438
00:24:17.750 --> 00:24:20.049
That guy's been on so many police blotters, he writes
439
00:24:20.089 --> 00:24:23.180
his name backward. Well, I'm glad he came in to
440
00:24:23.200 --> 00:24:26.619
vote anyway. Only two more and we've won $ 250. Only
441
00:24:26.660 --> 00:24:30.180
two more, Molly. I'll bet we're the only precinct in
442
00:24:30.200 --> 00:24:32.700
the United States that voted 100%.
443
00:24:32.700 --> 00:24:38.009
I lived in one once that voted 425%. It was
444
00:24:38.049 --> 00:24:39.710
a wet neighborhood and we had a bunch of floaters.
445
00:24:42.220 --> 00:24:43.220
Oh, hi, McGee.
446
00:24:43.259 --> 00:24:43.700
Hello, Mrs.
447
00:24:43.779 --> 00:24:44.079
McGee.
448
00:24:44.180 --> 00:24:44.740
Hello, Mr.
449
00:24:44.920 --> 00:24:45.500
Gildersleeve.
450
00:24:45.539 --> 00:24:46.619
Come right in. Yeah.
451
00:24:46.839 --> 00:24:47.799
Hi, Gildersleeve.
452
00:24:47.900 --> 00:24:48.569
Glad to see you.
453
00:24:49.289 --> 00:24:50.289
What'd you come in here for?
454
00:24:50.650 --> 00:24:51.069
To vote.
455
00:24:51.089 --> 00:24:51.730
Fine.
456
00:24:51.809 --> 00:24:52.349
Here's the ballot.
457
00:24:52.390 --> 00:24:52.970
Here's the pencil.
458
00:24:53.170 --> 00:24:54.650
Just take it in the next room.
459
00:24:54.789 --> 00:24:57.569
Now, wait a minute.
460
00:24:57.630 --> 00:24:59.009
Don't rush me.
461
00:24:59.589 --> 00:25:01.150
Well, shucks, Gildy. You got a vote.
462
00:25:01.250 --> 00:25:03.990
Who says I got a vote? I'm an American citizen, McGee.
463
00:25:04.279 --> 00:25:05.279
Nobody can make me vote.
464
00:25:05.619 --> 00:25:06.859
Well, then what'd you come in here for?
465
00:25:06.900 --> 00:25:07.319
To vote.
466
00:25:07.359 --> 00:25:07.640
Good.
467
00:25:07.859 --> 00:25:08.500
Here's the ballot.
468
00:25:08.839 --> 00:25:09.400
Oh, no, you don't.
469
00:25:09.420 --> 00:25:10.480
You can't rush me into this.
470
00:25:11.819 --> 00:25:14.619
Rush you into this. Now look, Gilder, as one American
471
00:25:14.660 --> 00:25:15.180
to another.
472
00:25:15.619 --> 00:25:17.259
I appeal to your patriotism.
473
00:25:17.700 --> 00:25:18.940
I appeal to your... Don't you.
474
00:25:18.859 --> 00:25:21.980
Wave the flag at me either, McGee. My forefathers were
475
00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:24.789
in this country long before yours. Oh, is that so?
476
00:25:24.829 --> 00:25:25.420
Yes, it is.
477
00:25:25.960 --> 00:25:27.829
My mother had 12 sisters in the D.A.R.
478
00:25:27.970 --> 00:25:29.910
Well, I knew you had aunts, Gildersleeve, but I didn't
479
00:25:29.930 --> 00:25:30.690
know what they were in.
480
00:25:30.710 --> 00:25:43.529
You're a hard man, McGee. Just for that, I won't vote.
481
00:25:44.509 --> 00:25:46.150
Oh, dear, oh, dear.
482
00:25:46.170 --> 00:25:48.369
You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Mr.
483
00:25:48.390 --> 00:25:49.630
Gildersleeve, not voting.
484
00:25:49.730 --> 00:25:50.210
Well.
485
00:25:50.380 --> 00:25:52.400
Why, your wife was the first one in when we
486
00:25:52.440 --> 00:25:53.480
opened up this morning.
487
00:25:53.500 --> 00:25:54.700
What? She was?
488
00:25:54.740 --> 00:25:55.460
You bet she was.
489
00:25:55.480 --> 00:25:57.339
Why, she's voting for a different candidate than I am.
490
00:25:57.660 --> 00:25:58.619
She can't do this to me.
491
00:25:58.759 --> 00:25:59.279
Give me a ballot.
492
00:25:59.400 --> 00:25:59.619
Here.
493
00:25:59.859 --> 00:26:00.799
Give me a pencil.
494
00:26:01.019 --> 00:26:01.440
Here.
495
00:26:01.539 --> 00:26:07.650
President X, X, X, X, X, Congressman X, Judge Municipal X.
496
00:26:07.670 --> 00:26:09.789
Here, here, here. Make it in the other room and
497
00:26:09.829 --> 00:26:10.049
mark it.
498
00:26:10.049 --> 00:26:10.990
It's all marked in the box.
499
00:26:11.690 --> 00:26:17.859
I'll show Madam Gildersleeve. Well, many happy returns, folks.
500
00:26:26.980 --> 00:26:30.059
Many happy returns. Of all the corny.
501
00:26:30.380 --> 00:26:31.619
Oh, heavenly days, McGee.
502
00:26:31.640 --> 00:26:31.819
Look.
503
00:26:32.019 --> 00:26:32.180
Huh?
504
00:26:32.339 --> 00:26:34.220
Look what time it is. We have to close the
505
00:26:34.240 --> 00:26:35.559
polls in exactly two minutes.
506
00:26:35.759 --> 00:26:36.440
Oh, but we can't.
507
00:26:36.740 --> 00:26:38.240
There's still one voter that ain't come in.
508
00:26:38.279 --> 00:26:40.720
Nevertheless, we'll have to close. We've got to keep it legal,
509
00:26:40.779 --> 00:26:41.119
you know.
510
00:26:41.140 --> 00:26:42.380
Oh, but he can't do that to us.
511
00:26:42.660 --> 00:26:44.480
He's cheating us out of 250 bucks.
512
00:26:45.140 --> 00:26:46.099
Oh, come on, bud.
513
00:26:46.380 --> 00:26:48.259
Whoever you are.
514
00:26:48.299 --> 00:26:49.140
That rat of luck.
515
00:26:49.500 --> 00:26:54.099
If he don't show up within two minutes, we're... Ah, say.
516
00:26:55.049 --> 00:26:55.369
Good.
517
00:26:55.289 --> 00:26:56.410
Evening to the both of you.
518
00:26:56.930 --> 00:26:58.809
And a very good evening to you, sir.
519
00:26:59.049 --> 00:27:00.630
Hurry, McGee. Here you are, bud.
520
00:27:00.950 --> 00:27:01.950
We'll just skip the questions.
521
00:27:02.170 --> 00:27:03.789
You only got a minute to make out your ballot.
522
00:27:04.109 --> 00:27:04.710
Me what?
523
00:27:05.049 --> 00:27:06.789
Your ballot. Don't stand there and argue.
524
00:27:06.829 --> 00:27:07.309
Hurry up.
525
00:27:07.730 --> 00:27:09.589
The voting booth is in the other room. We'll check
526
00:27:09.609 --> 00:27:10.869
your registration afterwards.
527
00:27:10.930 --> 00:27:12.769
I'm not here to vote, McCusker.
528
00:27:13.349 --> 00:27:14.549
I'm from the city hall.
529
00:27:15.009 --> 00:27:19.400
Come to take your ballot card. The polls are closed.
530
00:27:19.839 --> 00:27:20.480
Good night to you.
531
00:27:26.279 --> 00:27:29.319
Well, I didn't want a new green automobile with red
532
00:27:29.380 --> 00:27:30.160
upholstery and the.
533
00:27:30.099 --> 00:27:32.619
Top goes up and down when you press the button anyway.
534
00:27:32.740 --> 00:27:36.200
Oh, McGee, darling, don't take it to heart, so.
535
00:27:36.420 --> 00:27:36.539
I.
536
00:27:37.599 --> 00:27:38.500
I can't help it, Molly.
537
00:27:38.519 --> 00:27:42.809
Oh, now, now, just because some stupid, short-sighted, irresponsible, un-American
538
00:27:42.869 --> 00:27:44.130
rapscallion forgot to vote.
539
00:27:44.150 --> 00:27:47.049
Please, Molly, don't talk like that. He ain't really a
540
00:27:47.069 --> 00:27:47.609
bad guy.
541
00:27:47.630 --> 00:27:48.049
What?
542
00:27:48.369 --> 00:27:49.829
You know who it was? Yes.
543
00:27:50.009 --> 00:27:50.289
Who?
544
00:27:51.170 --> 00:27:51.839
Me. Me.
545
00:27:59.029 --> 00:28:01.640
A small talent for one thing or another, painting or
546
00:28:01.680 --> 00:28:04.859
music or even amateur theatricals. We might occasionally do something
547
00:28:04.880 --> 00:28:07.500
that seems brilliant, but the next effort might be very ordinary.
548
00:28:07.940 --> 00:28:10.519
And that marks the main difference between talent and genius.
549
00:28:11.019 --> 00:28:13.119
For with the artist who has genius, every effort is
550
00:28:13.180 --> 00:28:14.220
brilliant and surefire.
551
00:28:14.660 --> 00:28:15.859
It's that way in business, too.
552
00:28:16.099 --> 00:28:18.970
Some products are here today, gone tomorrow. Whereas others are
553
00:28:18.990 --> 00:28:21.910
so consistent in quality and service that they become accepted
554
00:28:21.950 --> 00:28:25.349
as household standards. The many products of S.C. Johnson &
555
00:28:25.349 --> 00:28:29.180
Son Incorporated, makers of Johnson's Wax, are surely in this category.
556
00:28:29.559 --> 00:28:32.799
For more than 50 years, they have been giving unfailing satisfaction.
557
00:28:33.279 --> 00:28:36.279
When you think of polishes, think of genuine Johnson's Wax
558
00:28:36.319 --> 00:28:39.240
in the familiar paste or liquid form for floors, and
559
00:28:39.289 --> 00:28:42.609
the new cream wax for furniture, or Johnson's self-polishing glow
560
00:28:42.650 --> 00:28:47.230
coat for linoleum, Johnson's shine-up silver polish, and Johnson's car.
561
00:28:46.990 --> 00:28:47.950
New for your car.
562
00:28:52.529 --> 00:28:55.400
Let's go to the Bijoux Theater, McGee. They're giving election
563
00:28:55.440 --> 00:28:56.500
returns during the show.
564
00:28:56.700 --> 00:28:57.819
Oh, just like us, huh?
565
00:28:57.980 --> 00:29:00.119
Exactly. That's why I wanted to go. What do you mean?
566
00:29:00.160 --> 00:29:00.599
What's there?
567
00:29:00.880 --> 00:29:03.140
Election returns and no time for comedy.
568
00:29:03.960 --> 00:29:05.420
Oh. Good night.
569
00:29:05.519 --> 00:29:06.329
Good night, all.
570
00:29:06.349 --> 00:29:13.130
This is Harlow Wilcox, speaking for the makers of Johnson's.
571
00:29:12.869 --> 00:29:16.089
Wax and Johnson's Self-Polishing Glow Coat, inviting you to be.
572
00:29:15.950 --> 00:29:17.509
With us again next Tuesday night.
573
00:29:17.579 --> 00:29:17.990
Good night.
574
00:29:22.170 --> 00:29:23.329
Attention car owners.
575
00:29:23.630 --> 00:29:27.200
What product does two things at once? It's Johnson's Car New,
576
00:29:27.220 --> 00:29:30.720
the sensational new auto polish that both cleans and wax
577
00:29:30.759 --> 00:29:34.220
polishes your car in one easy operation. It used to
578
00:29:34.289 --> 00:29:36.509
take hard work and cost real money to do those
579
00:29:36.549 --> 00:29:39.349
two jobs, but with Car New, you can do them
580
00:29:39.410 --> 00:29:42.099
in half the time. Car new is a liquid that
581
00:29:42.180 --> 00:29:45.259
dries to a white powder. Wipe this powder off, and
582
00:29:45.299 --> 00:29:48.619
you'll say with car owners everywhere, your car looks like
583
00:29:48.700 --> 00:29:51.609
new when you use car new. Buy a can tomorrow.
584
00:29:51.690 --> 00:29:52.890
Get your car.
585
00:29:52.609 --> 00:29:53.269
Ready for winter.
586
00:29:53.589 --> 00:29:55.369
This is the National Broadcasting Company.
587
00:30:01.250 --> 00:30:05.190
That concludes Fibber McGee and Mollie, Election Day. Follow Fibber
588
00:30:05.210 --> 00:30:07.460
McGee and Mollie for more classic broadcasts.
