Everything’s Perfect Except… Maybe You Should Quit

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I know. Follow us for more health advice. Water.
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Hide my feet though. You know, you got to pay
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extra for those.
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That's right.
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It's a million degrees outside.
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I know.
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You're lucky I'm not in a thong right now.
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Hot as hell out there.
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I was like upstairs. I was like, what am I
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going to put on? I bought all these cute outfits
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and I was like, that seems like it's going to
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be so hot right now. I cannot sit in here.
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I put on the biggest jeans I have. I was like,
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how baggy can they be? So that they don't. touch me.
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I was spending about 30 to 40 minutes of quiet
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time basically in the pool. After I did my Duolingo
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and my Bible reading, I got in the pool and
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basically got wet and then I would get out and
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when the heat dried me, my time was over.
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So five seconds.
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Yeah, right. Yeah.
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So what are we talking about today?
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We're talking about hitting it and quitting it. well no
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did i get the wrong.
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Memo i think you got the right memo but maybe
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said it in the different way than what we intended
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but we could go down that.
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Um quitting culture quitting culture which you know i i
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don't know at quitting culture i don't know if that's
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talked about in a good thing a good way or
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a bad way Do you know?
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So here's in full transparency, we've mentioned that people blow
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us up to have guests on our show all the time.
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First of all, we can't. Clearly you see our studio space.
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There's no room for a guest.
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Yeah. And also we can't be vacuuming in here to
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prepare for company.
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If y'all saw this floor, it's disgusting.
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It looks like a dirt floor from the 1600s or something.
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Seriously, it's a little atrocious. But We're an opinion show.
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Right.
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So, and maybe one day we'll have guests on and stuff.
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We've talked about it, but it would definitely take some.
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Rearranging. But somebody was like, oh, you should have Dr.
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So-and-so on to talk about quitting culture and like this
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next generation. And they just quit everything. There's no follow through.
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And I was like, well, fucking expert.
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Let's talk about it. You got an opinion?
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Because I do.
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I do too, actually.
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So thanks for the idea.
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Uh-huh. So quitting culture.
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I actually think it can be talked about in a
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negative or a positive way, much like everything.
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Same.
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In some ways, I give some props to the next
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generation because I do think sometimes it's recognizing when something
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isn't for– like I think there's a difference between quitting
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and recognizing when something isn't for you or no longer
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aligned or you gave it a shot and you're like, oh,
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that's not what I thought it would be and then
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walking away from it because it's just not right for you.
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Yeah.
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I think quitting like– I used to say this to
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Dom all the time. Like if you join a sports team,
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you're on it for the season. You don't get to
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quit because that team's counting on you. If you decide
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at the end of the season that you don't want
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to play again next season, then that's fine. We won't
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sign up.
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Yeah.
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But you can't quit in the middle. So I think
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there's a difference there. I think if you're in a
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relationship and you realize.
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This isn't what I thought it would be.
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You don't have to stay in it and.
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Right.
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Fucking white knuckle your way to try to force a
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square peg into a round hole. Like, I mentioned this
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to you. It's so funny. Like, just thinking of the
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relationship stuff. Like, you can date as many people as
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you want. And when those relationships end, like, nobody really
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has judgment on it. No one judges you, yeah. I mean,
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they might be like, oh, well, you know, you go
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through them, but whatever. Like, there's no like, oh, you quit.
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It's like, that didn't work. But if you get divorced,
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you quit.
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And it's like, well....
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You were in it. It didn't work out. Now you're not.
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Like who's to say if you tried, if you tried
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to make it work and it didn't, why is it quitting?
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Yeah. I really see things as like my life. I
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hope this is understood and doesn't sound selfish is a
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commitment to myself. And so to me, you follow me.
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Let's say that analogy, you get married, it's not working.
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You staying in a marriage that isn't working is actually
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you quitting on like love and how you want it
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to serve you.
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And your happiness.
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And your happiness. You choosing and realizing and accepting that
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this isn't for you. This relationship isn't what you thought
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it was going to be and isn't working. And exiting
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that relationship, ending that relationship is actually continuing to seek
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what you know is right for you. And so to me,
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it's like people quit all the time, but sometimes quitting
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is staying in the place that isn't serving you. You're
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quitting the pursuit of the life that you want.
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It's just easier to stay put than it is to
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actually go find something that works. It's easier to stay comfortable.
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So sometimes I think, yeah, I think it's like, okay,
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quitting a job.
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Mm-hmm.
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So if you're in a job and you're absolutely miserable
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and you hate it and you're sacrificing your mental sanity
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for it, I think exit stage left.
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Exactly.
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But I think there's responsible ways to do it. You
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give the appropriate amount of notice. You maybe have something
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else lined up as a job so that financially you're
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not strapped all of a sudden.
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Mm-hmm.
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So I think there's ways to do it. I do
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think sometimes the younger generation is like, oh, I worked
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there for five days and I hated it, so I quit.
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It's like, okay, well, hold on. Yeah. You're not going
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to love– I will say, you're not going to love
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every single thing you do all day long. No matter
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like what the job is, like there are aspects of
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my job I love and there are aspects of my
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job I just despise. Anytime you're in a relationship, there's
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going to be things you love and there's going to
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be days that they just irritate the shit out of you.
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Yeah.
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Yeah. you have to have some patience.
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Totally. Like the grass is always greener. And if you're
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just like in a moment where you're that you shouldn't,
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like there is a time and place, a right way
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to understand when something has, you know, this might be
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controversial and you might disagree with me on this.
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Bring it.
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I actually used to tell people like, and when body
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had the network. And so we were coaching people through,
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through workouts and stuff. But if someone was not vibing
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with a workout, like, like, program, let's say it's an
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eight-week workout program, I would tell them three weeks in,
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if they still were like, oh my God, I just missed,
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I'd be like, all right, go back to the one
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that you love. Because to me, movement and working out
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is a part of your daily activity, and it should
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be something you enjoy. And at that time, a lot
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of people were so committed to fully finishing a program
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that they started, even if they just, it wasn't for them.
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And that is another example. I was like, don't quit
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working out, but you don't have to be married to
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doing this particular one if you just don't like it
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as much.
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I don't disagree with you at all. In fact, and
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this is not me being bitchy. This is me just
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saying it from like how it was presented to me.
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A lot of times, like, cause you know, each trainer
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would have people that were just diehard, like you're my person.
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Okay.
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So obviously if I'm, if I'm their, their trainer that
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they resonate with, They would still try other workout programs.
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And I would always encourage people to, they would be like, well,
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I feel like I'm cheating on you. I'm like, no,
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if you want to do the workout program, do the workout.
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Like guys, there's no hard feelings here. But a lot
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of times what people would do is they would message
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me and they would be like, okay, so I started
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the blah, blah, blah program, whatever, like not one of mine.
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And they would be like, oh my God, I hate it. Like,
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should I just come back to yours? But I'm trying
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to sell this one because it's the one launching. And
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I'm like, hold on. If you're going to switch and
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go back to whether it's one of my programs or
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somebody else's programs, you need to be honest about that.
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Because if you're going to get results from the, like,
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let's say you're coming back to mine and you're getting
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results from it, but you're saying it's from that other one.
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You're giving false hope and promises because you don't know
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what your results would have been from that one. Yeah.
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So that's not fair to the person you're selling to
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if you're lying about it.
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Right.
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Be honest. Just say, I think there's so many great
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aspects to this. I personally decided I want to lift
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or I want to do Pilates or whatever. You could
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say it nicely. It doesn't have to mean that you're
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putting somebody else's program down. Yeah.
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I did that.
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But be honest about it so that you're not selling
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somebody the wrong thing.
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I can't remember. It was when Dig Deeper launched. I
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was like running a group. But you could choose for
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that group to either do Dig Deeper. And maybe it
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was 80 Day Obsession. Or like it was another one
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that I've done that people were familiar with. And yeah,
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I think there... That is a fine line when you're
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like selling things based on... Your experience. Your experience, right.
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But if you're saying these are the two things available
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to you, this is what they offer.
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Yeah. So, yeah.
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Like if you're... Whatever you're in.
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And.
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Also, I think... Like for me, when I was vegan,
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that was a very serious part of my life for
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a long time. And it was... not just about like
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the diet I was eating. To me, it was almost
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a spiritual practice. It was like a very connected to
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my food, like type of woo woo shit. But I
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came to a place where it wasn't serving me the same.
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And it was a big decision for me. And I
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would joke about it lightheartedly, but I found myself in
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a position where the reason I continued to be vegan
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was because of what other people might perceive by me
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no longer being vegan. But my thoughts I was interested
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and continued thinking about introducing animal protein back into my diet.
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My convictions had changed. And I'm someone who holds space.
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My convictions could change again and I could go back
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to being vegan. But I didn't feel like I was...
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Even though I did quit being vegan, I'm glad that
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I did because I was choosing to be true to myself.
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That's how much your body's changed since you stopped being vegan.
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Absolutely.
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And nothing against being vegan.
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Right. And it just made... things simpler. And that's what
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I was looking for. I wanted to be able to
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have foods that were just protein. And when you're vegan,
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that's pretty much impossible. I don't, I can't, I think
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every protein is a carb.
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Has carbs.
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Has carbs.
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Right.
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Where like, if you eat, you know, chicken breast, you're
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pretty much just getting protein.
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Some fat. Right.
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Yeah.
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Depending on the dark meat or whatever, but yeah.
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But yes.
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And so, yeah. And that aspect, it's like, quitting, it's
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not really quitting. It's you did something, you practiced. Listen, okay,
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I used to play violin. For years, I played the violin.
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And then I stopped, mostly because my dad forced it
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down my damn throat. Like, it wasn't very... Also, I
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started when I was seven, and I probably stopped when
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I was like 11 or 12. So very young.
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Yeah.
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But like, it wasn't bringing me joy. I was a dancer.
250
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I grew up dancing. I majored in dance in college.
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And I was so emotionally beat down in college and
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traumatized by it that I quit dancing for years. I
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couldn't bring myself to step foot in a dance studio.
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And then I finally did go back to it. And
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that felt really good to be back in dance class
256
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and then life. And so I don't really go to
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dance classes anymore. Not really. I don't go to dance
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classes anymore. Maybe once every two years, you'll be like, hey,
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let's go take a dance. And I'll pop in. But like,
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I didn't quit. I danced.
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Yeah.
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For all the days ever. And now I don't dance anymore.
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And it's like, I don't have the same trauma around
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it that I did. It's just life's different. So I
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think it's an interesting thing. I think that idea of, okay,
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I guess... Well, let me ask you this. How long
267
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do you have to do something or try something before
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it's perceived differently between like I quit it or I
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gave it a true try and it's not for me?
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You know what? I think it's not necessarily about the time,
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but I think there's some questions that you need to
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ask yourself. Okay, let's hear it. And I'm just off
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the cuff. Okay. I think that if you're doing something
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and you want... to quit what you're doing, is it
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because something else would serve you more or because you're
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in a headspace where you just want to stay in bed?
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Because like, you know, that's an extreme example, but I
278
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think sometimes we just are exhausted and it is okay
279
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to free up space in your day if you're are
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quitting something because it's not serving the purpose it's supposed
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to and something else can serve that purpose. Like, for example,
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if someone was taking a hip-hop dance class and they
283
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just weren't enjoying it, but they loved a jazz class.
284
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Of course, go take the jazz class.
285
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Switch it immediately.
286
00:13:32.960 --> 00:13:36.080
Yeah, that's not quitting at all, in my opinion. But
287
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if you were on a competition team, if you tried
288
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out and made the competition team. And then you were like, well,
289
00:13:41.610 --> 00:13:43.629
I don't really like the dance or I don't really
290
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like the instructor and you quit on the team. And
291
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the dance has already been choreographed around the number of people.
292
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Well, that's just, that's messed up, but that's messed up.
293
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So to me, that's quitting, switching up the dance class
294
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because that's not your class or you didn't particularly enjoy
295
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the teacher or you go find a different teacher.
296
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Yeah. I think when, when you're on it, when you're
297
00:14:03.279 --> 00:14:08.240
quitting affects other people, you need to be, um, like
298
00:14:08.500 --> 00:14:13.919
obviously communicate and find an exit that doesn't affect the
299
00:14:13.980 --> 00:14:17.809
team and stay on. Like if you have a competition
300
00:14:17.850 --> 00:14:21.370
coming up, just stay on for the team.
301
00:14:21.389 --> 00:14:23.509
Yeah, because you made the commitment. So you need to
302
00:14:23.529 --> 00:14:24.450
be responsible.
303
00:14:24.909 --> 00:14:28.809
Exactly. But if you're, I think it's good if you're
304
00:14:28.830 --> 00:14:32.009
trying something new, I think you should give it at least...
305
00:14:32.659 --> 00:14:36.139
Like for workouts, for example, I tell people to commit
306
00:14:36.610 --> 00:14:40.110
at least one week at a time. Because you might
307
00:14:40.149 --> 00:14:42.309
start a workout and on Wednesday be like, I'm so
308
00:14:42.409 --> 00:14:45.490
over this. But you should have your week planned out.
309
00:14:45.929 --> 00:14:47.669
And so just stick to the plan for a week.
310
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If you're over it in three days... You need discipline.
311
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Yeah, right.
312
00:14:51.950 --> 00:14:55.529
Like there is that. And I do think sometimes– and
313
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I don't want to just say the next generation under
314
00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:00.240
us because I see it in our generation too. Like
315
00:15:00.279 --> 00:15:04.419
some people just aren't disciplined. And you're like, okay, three
316
00:15:04.460 --> 00:15:06.700
days in and you're quitting. Three days in and you're
317
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quitting your nutrition program. You didn't even give it a chance.
318
00:15:09.620 --> 00:15:10.399
Exactly.
319
00:15:10.620 --> 00:15:13.990
Like, oh, it's hard. Yeah, no shit because it's brand new.
320
00:15:14.169 --> 00:15:18.110
Like obviously– You know, I know everybody uses the example
321
00:15:18.149 --> 00:15:20.750
of like a baby learning to walk. Like we don't
322
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have a bunch of grownups crawling around. Like you work,
323
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you go until you get it.
324
00:15:25.090 --> 00:15:25.169
Yeah.
325
00:15:25.190 --> 00:15:29.269
Right. It's like, yeah, if you constantly are quitting every
326
00:15:29.450 --> 00:15:32.840
single thing you start, you're never giving anything a chance
327
00:15:33.860 --> 00:15:37.120
to get easier, to get more familiar, to get better
328
00:15:37.320 --> 00:15:39.639
at it. I mean, your workouts are never really supposed
329
00:15:39.659 --> 00:15:42.259
to be easy unless you're in like an active recovery
330
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type workout.
331
00:15:44.279 --> 00:15:44.980
Right. Like.
332
00:15:45.759 --> 00:15:49.720
You should be challenged that's the whole point exactly your
333
00:15:49.799 --> 00:15:53.690
nutrition should get easier but you have to adjust your
334
00:15:53.730 --> 00:15:55.809
mindset around it you've got to just like anything you
335
00:15:55.830 --> 00:15:57.529
got to practice it it's like oh one day you
336
00:15:57.669 --> 00:15:59.970
know if you're trying to learn the piano okay you're
337
00:15:59.990 --> 00:16:03.090
learning scales uh-huh you got to learn to walk or
338
00:16:03.129 --> 00:16:04.929
you got to learn to crawl before you can walk
339
00:16:04.970 --> 00:16:07.590
or before you can run so it's like it's never
340
00:16:07.610 --> 00:16:10.149
going to get easier if you start quit go back
341
00:16:10.269 --> 00:16:13.210
start again quit go back right.
342
00:16:12.909 --> 00:16:15.840
Like No, and how long do they say it takes
343
00:16:15.860 --> 00:16:16.720
to form a new habit?
344
00:16:16.740 --> 00:16:19.139
I mean, it's usually 21 days. That's where 21-day fix
345
00:16:19.159 --> 00:16:21.519
came from. It's like it's 21 days to build a habit,
346
00:16:21.519 --> 00:16:24.639
21 days to break a habit. But really, I think
347
00:16:24.639 --> 00:16:26.700
21 is the bare minimum.
348
00:16:26.759 --> 00:16:30.919
Me too, for a habit. So that's the thing. The
349
00:16:30.960 --> 00:16:32.799
problem is a lot of people are like, I don't
350
00:16:32.820 --> 00:16:35.080
like working out and quit working out. That option needs
351
00:16:35.120 --> 00:16:37.799
to not be available to you. Working out is something
352
00:16:37.840 --> 00:16:41.259
that is important to do. Maybe the kind of working
353
00:16:41.379 --> 00:16:44.129
out is like... You know, people start at all different
354
00:16:44.169 --> 00:16:48.269
places and you have had a career and done a
355
00:16:48.289 --> 00:16:53.169
very good job at making a workout that is accessible
356
00:16:53.289 --> 00:16:56.990
to people of all different levels. But there are some,
357
00:16:57.009 --> 00:17:02.419
like I have a friend who... really needs very specific modifications,
358
00:17:02.580 --> 00:17:06.579
for example. And so there are some workouts that just aren't,
359
00:17:07.220 --> 00:17:09.440
she can't get the most out of. And it's like,
360
00:17:09.480 --> 00:17:10.579
that's not the one you should be doing.
361
00:17:10.599 --> 00:17:11.839
That's not the one for you, absolutely.
362
00:17:12.079 --> 00:17:15.410
But so, okay, give it a try. Continue to try,
363
00:17:15.529 --> 00:17:18.890
find your modifications. But some things I think if it's
364
00:17:18.930 --> 00:17:20.769
a weekend and you're like, I want to keep working out.
365
00:17:20.829 --> 00:17:23.609
I just need to find one that works for me.
366
00:17:24.670 --> 00:17:27.000
And that's what I say. Like, all of these things
367
00:17:28.000 --> 00:17:30.579
that we're adding in our lives, they aren't for us
368
00:17:30.619 --> 00:17:33.799
to work for them. They're there to work for us
369
00:17:34.019 --> 00:17:36.039
and our goals and just remembering that.
370
00:17:36.349 --> 00:17:36.640
Yeah.
371
00:17:36.829 --> 00:17:42.019
But I think it is important to... at least until
372
00:17:42.099 --> 00:17:44.859
you get back to setting a new plan, like stick
373
00:17:44.900 --> 00:17:47.079
to the plan. Sort of like if you buy groceries
374
00:17:47.119 --> 00:17:49.500
for the week, you might not like what you decided
375
00:17:49.559 --> 00:17:51.740
to meal prep, but you're probably not gonna throw it
376
00:17:51.769 --> 00:17:53.569
in the trash. You're just not gonna make it again
377
00:17:53.619 --> 00:17:54.089
next week.
378
00:17:54.240 --> 00:17:57.230
Yeah, there's definitely been plenty of meals, by the way,
379
00:17:57.289 --> 00:17:58.710
that I've done that where I make it. I'm just
380
00:17:58.750 --> 00:18:01.890
like- Womp womp. Yeah, that's uninteresting.
381
00:18:01.910 --> 00:18:04.710
I'm not starving, but this isn't my request.
382
00:18:04.809 --> 00:18:07.289
And that is a place where it gets hard because
383
00:18:07.309 --> 00:18:12.910
you're like, it didn't fully satisfy you, not in terms
384
00:18:12.950 --> 00:18:17.309
of hunger, but it didn't satisfy your desire or your
385
00:18:17.369 --> 00:18:20.849
emotion or like, yeah, I don't know if those are
386
00:18:20.869 --> 00:18:22.650
the right words for the meal, but you get to
387
00:18:22.990 --> 00:18:24.269
the end of the meal and you're like, that's where
388
00:18:24.289 --> 00:18:27.990
you're left going like, I need something sweet or I
389
00:18:28.029 --> 00:18:31.650
need something salty because you didn't quite get it there.
390
00:18:31.670 --> 00:18:35.019
So again, having a better relationship and just recognizing that
391
00:18:35.079 --> 00:18:37.160
or going, okay, well, what little healthy thing could I
392
00:18:37.200 --> 00:18:38.539
have that would kind of satisfy this?
393
00:18:39.880 --> 00:18:45.460
Also, Understanding that part of liking something is choosing to
394
00:18:45.519 --> 00:18:49.299
like it. That's not for everything, but a lot of
395
00:18:49.339 --> 00:18:52.009
people will be like, oh, I just don't like working out. Well,
396
00:18:52.200 --> 00:18:56.109
you can. You actually will be able to like working out.
397
00:18:56.670 --> 00:19:01.240
You just need to... decide like find like you said
398
00:19:01.279 --> 00:19:04.240
workouts don't get easier because they stay challenging but you
399
00:19:04.279 --> 00:19:06.339
learn you start to love the challenge when you do
400
00:19:06.359 --> 00:19:07.180
it long enough.
401
00:19:07.099 --> 00:19:09.250
Right like i was looking up something but yeah like
402
00:19:09.789 --> 00:19:12.569
so that's kind like you have to give yourself a
403
00:19:12.609 --> 00:19:17.009
chance because there is actual like fun excitement joy in
404
00:19:18.329 --> 00:19:21.480
overcoming and if you quit before you get to that
405
00:19:21.559 --> 00:19:26.730
point you're missing like a really cool part of the experience.
406
00:19:27.069 --> 00:19:29.369
Something that builds your character and sort of builds that
407
00:19:29.410 --> 00:19:33.829
endurance to stick with, I don't, I don't love this
408
00:19:33.950 --> 00:19:34.769
particular thing.
409
00:19:35.549 --> 00:19:35.730
Right.
410
00:19:35.809 --> 00:19:39.609
And again, there's always that fine line of finishing it
411
00:19:39.609 --> 00:19:43.170
because you started it. And then just, I mean, if
412
00:19:43.170 --> 00:19:47.170
the finishing it is 40 years with somebody, you hate.
413
00:19:47.970 --> 00:19:49.170
Yeah.
414
00:19:49.210 --> 00:19:51.150
You may not want to finish that one. But yeah,
415
00:19:51.190 --> 00:19:55.230
like getting to that next level in your workout where
416
00:19:55.269 --> 00:19:59.480
you're like, oh, okay, it wasn't my favorite, but look
417
00:19:59.500 --> 00:20:01.700
how much stronger I got. And that is going to
418
00:20:01.740 --> 00:20:04.019
serve me to go do the next thing. Or getting
419
00:20:04.079 --> 00:20:06.519
to that next place in your nutrition where you're like, oh, wow,
420
00:20:06.720 --> 00:20:10.490
I have control over my food. It Maybe you started
421
00:20:10.569 --> 00:20:12.789
at an entry level position that was a little bit
422
00:20:12.849 --> 00:20:15.769
beneath your actual skill level, but it was a new company.
423
00:20:15.829 --> 00:20:17.170
And so you kind of had to go down a
424
00:20:17.210 --> 00:20:19.140
level to go up, but then you get the promotion
425
00:20:19.180 --> 00:20:21.299
and you're like, I stuck with it. I got the promotion.
426
00:20:21.839 --> 00:20:23.039
Now I'm on the right track.
427
00:20:23.380 --> 00:20:23.660
Yeah.
428
00:20:24.539 --> 00:20:27.680
Like, you know, I love the TV show friends, obviously.
429
00:20:27.700 --> 00:20:30.599
And there's, you know, early on when they were like
430
00:20:31.200 --> 00:20:33.869
still trying to find their way, like their younger years,
431
00:20:34.529 --> 00:20:38.069
Rachel wanted a career in fashion. And she's like the
432
00:20:38.109 --> 00:20:43.779
assistant at this, like, tiny little whatever, nothing. It's not
433
00:20:43.819 --> 00:20:48.009
a fashion. They like make, I don't know, like work, uh,
434
00:20:48.049 --> 00:20:49.769
like a hospital garments or something.
435
00:20:49.789 --> 00:20:50.509
I don't know.
436
00:20:50.529 --> 00:20:52.809
And like the guy comes in and she's like making
437
00:20:52.849 --> 00:20:54.619
him his coffee and he's like, I shouldn't have it.
438
00:20:54.650 --> 00:20:57.990
Coffee makes me gassy. And she's like, I know. And
439
00:20:58.039 --> 00:21:00.339
then he's like, I've got a job for you. That's
440
00:21:00.359 --> 00:21:02.900
a lot closer to fashion. And she's like, Oh yay.
441
00:21:02.960 --> 00:21:04.539
And he opens the closet and he's like, I need
442
00:21:04.559 --> 00:21:06.099
you to untangle all these hangers.
443
00:21:06.259 --> 00:21:07.369
Oh, Oh my God.
444
00:21:07.390 --> 00:21:09.890
Floor to ceiling hangers. And then she's like talking to
445
00:21:09.930 --> 00:21:12.039
Monica about how much she hates the job and wants
446
00:21:12.079 --> 00:21:14.059
to quit. And she's like, why would anybody stay in
447
00:21:14.099 --> 00:21:18.319
a job that's so demeaning? That's just remotely related to
448
00:21:18.339 --> 00:21:20.259
what you want to do. And in the meantime, Monica's
449
00:21:20.279 --> 00:21:23.769
behind like a 1950s counter, like cooking. And she's like,
450
00:21:24.069 --> 00:21:26.230
I don't know, Rach, I got to hold the duty.
451
00:21:26.250 --> 00:21:31.930
Like she wants to be a chef. She's working at
452
00:21:31.950 --> 00:21:35.910
this 1950s restaurant, like theme restaurant restaurant. And so there
453
00:21:36.009 --> 00:21:38.170
is something to be said for paying your dues.
454
00:21:38.710 --> 00:21:39.049
Totally.
455
00:21:39.069 --> 00:21:42.250
I guess is the very long-winded story I'm telling.
456
00:21:42.329 --> 00:21:47.089
No, there is. And so can you think of, like,
457
00:21:47.589 --> 00:21:50.910
something came to my mind that I wanted to quit. Okay.
458
00:21:50.930 --> 00:21:54.380
But I stuck with it. And it's because of the commitment.
459
00:21:54.900 --> 00:21:58.579
But I guess something that just came to my mind,
460
00:21:59.079 --> 00:22:02.380
if you start something that has, that's a commitment with
461
00:22:02.420 --> 00:22:06.279
an ending. Mm-hmm. Like, this is kind of the team thing.
462
00:22:06.319 --> 00:22:08.549
High Rocks is what I'm talking about. Okay. After I
463
00:22:08.569 --> 00:22:11.009
signed up for High Rocks, before we did High Rocks,
464
00:22:11.269 --> 00:22:13.549
I very much regretted signing up for High Rocks. And
465
00:22:13.609 --> 00:22:16.769
I was like, fuck this. I do not want to
466
00:22:16.789 --> 00:22:20.839
do High Rocks. Because after I signed up, we decided
467
00:22:20.890 --> 00:22:23.400
on a whim to move. And there was all this
468
00:22:23.539 --> 00:22:24.880
stuff going on.
469
00:22:24.900 --> 00:22:25.960
Well, maybe you should have moved.
470
00:22:26.900 --> 00:22:28.660
And I was just like, oh, my God. Why did
471
00:22:28.700 --> 00:22:32.259
I sign up for this? And Nell was like, also,
472
00:22:32.319 --> 00:22:34.240
this is crazy that we're doing this. We're moving in
473
00:22:34.269 --> 00:22:40.130
a week. But I was like, well, the option to
474
00:22:40.490 --> 00:22:44.250
not do it is gone. And other than we would
475
00:22:44.269 --> 00:22:44.930
just quit and.
476
00:22:45.430 --> 00:22:47.369
Not show up. Yeah, which really the option to not
477
00:22:47.410 --> 00:22:49.410
do it was absolutely there. Like the only person that
478
00:22:49.430 --> 00:22:50.950
was going to be bummed about it was me.
479
00:22:51.309 --> 00:22:51.589
Right.
480
00:22:51.609 --> 00:22:53.890
I would have let you have it because I would
481
00:22:53.910 --> 00:22:55.710
have been like, you're supposed to be here.
482
00:22:56.150 --> 00:22:58.309
But I was like, I committed to this and damn it,
483
00:22:58.490 --> 00:23:01.069
I'm just going to do it. Whether it sucks or not,
484
00:23:01.609 --> 00:23:05.450
at least I'm going to understand that. the weight of commitment.
485
00:23:05.809 --> 00:23:09.109
And I think that that is an important thing to consider.
486
00:23:09.349 --> 00:23:13.539
If you want to quit something, just consider what kind
487
00:23:13.559 --> 00:23:19.200
of commitment you made. And if it's worth not staying
488
00:23:19.240 --> 00:23:23.180
true to your commitment, the thing that's different about relationships,
489
00:23:23.200 --> 00:23:25.519
we were joking about this earlier. I said, if I
490
00:23:25.579 --> 00:23:28.119
ever get like married, if Nell and I got married,
491
00:23:28.160 --> 00:23:32.579
for example, um, my vows would be so unsexy because
492
00:23:32.599 --> 00:23:37.980
they'd be very specific. Like I vow to love you until, unless.
493
00:23:38.200 --> 00:23:38.599
Unless.
494
00:23:39.180 --> 00:23:43.059
Yeah. And it's binding only when, you know what I mean?
495
00:23:43.220 --> 00:23:44.319
If we grow apart.
496
00:23:44.480 --> 00:23:45.140
Exactly.
497
00:23:45.160 --> 00:23:47.099
I don't expect either one of us to stay in this.
498
00:23:47.380 --> 00:23:50.339
If you start treating me rude, I just, that's the
499
00:23:50.380 --> 00:23:52.140
deal breaker. You know what I mean?
500
00:23:52.180 --> 00:23:54.349
Not like one time, but like all of a sudden.
501
00:23:54.720 --> 00:23:57.769
Yeah, exactly. And so, If you.
502
00:23:57.700 --> 00:23:59.970
Just ignore me for 15 years, I don't need to
503
00:24:00.029 --> 00:24:01.990
stay in this and hope that one day you decide
504
00:24:02.009 --> 00:24:03.369
to pay attention to me again.
505
00:24:03.750 --> 00:24:06.799
Oh, yay. And so that is like the thing that
506
00:24:06.859 --> 00:24:10.279
I like about that analogy is it sets the commitment.
507
00:24:11.099 --> 00:24:13.779
And so it's really not quitting on my commitment. If
508
00:24:13.799 --> 00:24:16.089
you're on the relationship side of things, if all of
509
00:24:16.130 --> 00:24:18.240
a sudden you're in a place where this isn't what
510
00:24:18.259 --> 00:24:19.220
I committed to.
511
00:24:19.519 --> 00:24:19.740
Right.
512
00:24:19.779 --> 00:24:23.279
And I'm the only one holding up this two-way commitment.
513
00:24:23.319 --> 00:24:23.579
Yeah.
514
00:24:23.819 --> 00:24:27.430
Then you're not quitting your commitment. You're exiting a situation
515
00:24:27.450 --> 00:24:29.410
that became what it was not meant to be.
516
00:24:29.410 --> 00:24:32.589
I think you just said something so interesting. There's times
517
00:24:32.630 --> 00:24:36.259
when it's a one-way commitment. You committed to high rocks. It's,
518
00:24:36.599 --> 00:24:38.039
Not the end of it. Like if you decide not
519
00:24:38.059 --> 00:24:39.559
to do high rocks, that affects you.
520
00:24:39.579 --> 00:24:40.269
Right. Right.
521
00:24:40.619 --> 00:24:44.650
But yes, in a relationship, you have to relate to it.
522
00:24:44.650 --> 00:24:46.930
So if it's a two way street and only one
523
00:24:46.990 --> 00:24:50.589
person is showing up and the other one is like, no,
524
00:24:50.630 --> 00:24:54.289
I'm going the other way. then you're not responsible for
525
00:24:54.369 --> 00:24:55.250
carrying it.
526
00:24:55.349 --> 00:24:57.539
You're not doing what you signed up for anyways because
527
00:24:57.579 --> 00:24:58.190
the other person isn't.
528
00:24:58.210 --> 00:24:59.740
The other person said they were going to come in
529
00:24:59.779 --> 00:25:01.339
and do A, B, and C. So if they come
530
00:25:01.400 --> 00:25:03.720
in and they're not doing A, B, and C, why
531
00:25:03.779 --> 00:25:05.279
do you have to show up and do A, B,
532
00:25:05.299 --> 00:25:08.009
and C? And why are you the asshole if you're like, hey,
533
00:25:08.890 --> 00:25:13.660
this isn't what we... agreed to do. This is not
534
00:25:14.279 --> 00:25:17.799
a marriage. This is a friendship or whatever. So let's
535
00:25:17.819 --> 00:25:20.099
be friends. If we're not going to do the marriage part,
536
00:25:20.119 --> 00:25:21.589
then cool. We get to be friends.
537
00:25:21.609 --> 00:25:24.829
Yeah, let's make a new commitment. Yeah. Right.
538
00:25:24.869 --> 00:25:28.349
Let's dissolve this one and we'll figure out a different way.
539
00:25:29.029 --> 00:25:32.349
So I do think that is, you know, every situation
540
00:25:32.470 --> 00:25:35.769
has so many different things that you have to take
541
00:25:36.529 --> 00:25:39.690
into consideration. I don't think you could just go, Oh,
542
00:25:39.730 --> 00:25:41.190
this generation always quits.
543
00:25:41.410 --> 00:25:44.630
Me either. But, you know, on the flip side of things,
544
00:25:44.779 --> 00:25:48.259
because I am pro exiting something that isn't working for
545
00:25:48.299 --> 00:25:51.759
you within reason, not you have a bad day or
546
00:25:51.779 --> 00:25:54.839
I'm bored. You know what I mean? But I think
547
00:25:54.920 --> 00:26:00.660
that's understood. I do think on the flip side that...
548
00:26:01.130 --> 00:26:04.509
There is a lot about, I'm a huge boundaries guy,
549
00:26:05.059 --> 00:26:08.579
but people use boundaries as a cop-out.
550
00:26:08.160 --> 00:26:10.079
To just- Can we please talk about this?
551
00:26:10.519 --> 00:26:12.660
You know what I mean? Like, they're like, I can't
552
00:26:12.700 --> 00:26:15.519
do this. I'm setting a boundary. And it's like, you're
553
00:26:15.640 --> 00:26:18.980
actually just kind of being a bitch, you know? Yeah.
554
00:26:19.420 --> 00:26:21.599
So many people have leaned into that. I feel like
555
00:26:21.640 --> 00:26:27.859
in like the last 10 years, like, well, you're overstepping
556
00:26:27.900 --> 00:26:31.589
my boundaries. Well, no, these are my boundaries. I used
557
00:26:31.609 --> 00:26:33.210
to hear it on the Kardashians all the time. Like,
558
00:26:33.710 --> 00:26:34.880
Kourtney would always say it.
559
00:26:35.450 --> 00:26:35.630
Mm-hmm.
560
00:26:36.019 --> 00:26:37.599
She was always in therapy and she was always like.
561
00:26:37.619 --> 00:26:38.339
These are my boundaries.
562
00:26:38.359 --> 00:26:40.079
These are my boundaries. These are my boundaries. And it
563
00:26:40.099 --> 00:26:42.039
was like, you're just being a little bit bitchy.
564
00:26:42.740 --> 00:26:43.039
Uh-huh.
565
00:26:43.079 --> 00:26:45.880
Like, there's several people in my life. Well, no, I
566
00:26:45.920 --> 00:26:48.859
have a boundary. And I'm like, okay, hold on. No,
567
00:26:48.900 --> 00:26:53.109
you're avoiding conflict. You're avoiding an uncomfortable discussion that you
568
00:26:53.150 --> 00:26:56.210
don't like. You're not being an adult.
569
00:26:56.549 --> 00:26:56.829
Right.
570
00:26:57.369 --> 00:27:02.269
You're using boundaries as a way to avoid... any kind
571
00:27:02.329 --> 00:27:03.250
of just.
572
00:27:03.089 --> 00:27:07.549
Discomfort, like anything that might put you out that, you know,
573
00:27:07.690 --> 00:27:11.619
and it's, and it, no is always an acceptable answer,
574
00:27:12.200 --> 00:27:16.779
but the whole, honestly, I can be, and I have
575
00:27:16.799 --> 00:27:19.460
some friends who use it and I don't feel this way,
576
00:27:19.960 --> 00:27:24.589
but there have been people in my life who it's like, oh, that's,
577
00:27:25.240 --> 00:27:28.630
you know, um, I'm setting a boundary and it's like,
578
00:27:29.690 --> 00:27:32.250
What actually it feels like you're doing is just trying
579
00:27:32.269 --> 00:27:33.430
to control the situation.
580
00:27:33.490 --> 00:27:34.799
Yes. Yes.
581
00:27:34.819 --> 00:27:36.460
And that's really fucking annoying.
582
00:27:36.500 --> 00:27:39.000
Manipulate it to just be what you want it to be.
583
00:27:39.099 --> 00:27:39.400
Right.
584
00:27:39.599 --> 00:27:42.839
And if you don't agree with me, well, then you're
585
00:27:42.940 --> 00:27:45.279
overstepping my boundaries and how dare you? It's like, well,
586
00:27:45.319 --> 00:27:46.940
hold on. I'm allowed to have an opinion too or
587
00:27:47.140 --> 00:27:49.380
I'm allowed to have feelings too. I'm allowed to have
588
00:27:49.720 --> 00:27:54.130
my own boundaries around how this– whatever the situation might
589
00:27:54.250 --> 00:27:55.190
be goes.
590
00:27:56.269 --> 00:27:59.359
Well, I have been better too at just realizing– If
591
00:27:59.380 --> 00:28:01.619
someone says that, I've been like, okay. And it really
592
00:28:01.700 --> 00:28:05.000
is like, that's annoying. But that also tells me that
593
00:28:05.319 --> 00:28:09.480
you aren't a person I can rely on in these areas.
594
00:28:09.740 --> 00:28:13.599
Because for some reason, it crosses your boundary. You know
595
00:28:13.619 --> 00:28:14.859
what is coming to my mind?
596
00:28:14.880 --> 00:28:16.240
I was going to say, do you have a specific one?
597
00:28:16.460 --> 00:28:16.720
Well.
598
00:28:17.259 --> 00:28:17.940
Without saying a name.
599
00:28:18.059 --> 00:28:22.480
One thing I'm thinking about is my recent friendship that
600
00:28:22.500 --> 00:28:24.539
I talked a little bit about. That we were very
601
00:28:24.599 --> 00:28:29.650
close and now we just... still haven't spoken. It's honestly unbelievable.
602
00:28:31.029 --> 00:28:35.269
And that kind of ended, I didn't use the word boundaries,
603
00:28:35.849 --> 00:28:41.069
but basically I had given it enough time and wanted
604
00:28:41.109 --> 00:28:44.819
to talk through it and was told, we can talk
605
00:28:44.880 --> 00:28:47.279
when I'm ready. And I've said, well, that doesn't work
606
00:28:47.339 --> 00:28:50.920
for me. And so that was me setting a boundary.
607
00:28:50.960 --> 00:28:53.259
So that keeps coming to my mind because I'm like,
608
00:28:53.839 --> 00:28:57.930
are you being hypocritical? but no so it's not that
609
00:28:57.970 --> 00:29:02.019
bound it's not that honest true boundaries like if you
610
00:29:02.079 --> 00:29:06.599
have a need is a bad thing but when people
611
00:29:06.660 --> 00:29:10.720
are like you know not showing not like not showing
612
00:29:10.779 --> 00:29:12.519
up to work on time because they have a boundary
613
00:29:12.559 --> 00:29:16.789
around their morning routine and it's like you're just change
614
00:29:16.869 --> 00:29:17.970
it you know.
615
00:29:18.269 --> 00:29:20.910
Work to work starts at nine so get up earlier
616
00:29:20.990 --> 00:29:22.430
if you need to do your morning routine i don't
617
00:29:22.450 --> 00:29:23.509
know what you want me to tell you otherwise the
618
00:29:23.549 --> 00:29:30.079
job's not for you and you're Speaking about that situation, yours, no,
619
00:29:30.180 --> 00:29:33.509
you're not being hypocritical. And I'm not saying this because
620
00:29:33.569 --> 00:29:40.019
we're friends. That person had such a– they had used
621
00:29:40.059 --> 00:29:43.740
the word boundary. They were like, respect my boundaries, respect
622
00:29:43.819 --> 00:29:48.539
my time, which it was so blown out of proportion
623
00:29:48.819 --> 00:29:51.500
as it was. And then the respect my time and boundaries,
624
00:29:51.619 --> 00:29:55.519
it was like, okay, but like it's been like four
625
00:29:55.559 --> 00:29:57.180
months now. Uh-huh.
626
00:29:57.880 --> 00:29:58.799
Something like that. Yeah, like.
627
00:29:59.660 --> 00:30:02.539
at what point does your boundary end? When are you like,
628
00:30:02.920 --> 00:30:04.480
when do you want to talk about the friendship and
629
00:30:04.559 --> 00:30:08.640
the stupidity of this situation? Yeah. Like, so that was
630
00:30:08.680 --> 00:30:13.119
somebody using the boundaries thing as a way to manipulate
631
00:30:13.140 --> 00:30:18.279
and control the situation. Right. You stepping in and going, Hey,
632
00:30:18.839 --> 00:30:21.819
I gave you space for several weeks. We're either going
633
00:30:21.839 --> 00:30:23.900
to talk or I guess we're moving on because this
634
00:30:23.940 --> 00:30:27.279
isn't how I like, this isn't how you treat friends. Yeah.
635
00:30:27.339 --> 00:30:30.420
There's a difference. That's not really like, The triggering thing
636
00:30:30.460 --> 00:30:32.180
is when people use it to, like you said, control
637
00:30:32.200 --> 00:30:32.799
a situation.
638
00:30:32.819 --> 00:30:33.099
Right.
639
00:30:33.799 --> 00:30:36.880
That's just saying enough's enough. I'm not sitting here waiting
640
00:30:36.960 --> 00:30:39.660
for your breadcrumbs of like, oh, you want to be
641
00:30:39.700 --> 00:30:43.970
my friend again? Oh, thank you. Like, no, if something happens,
642
00:30:44.049 --> 00:30:47.329
have the damn discussion. Like, quit being a baby about it.
643
00:30:47.490 --> 00:30:51.069
Yeah. Well, and I'm just because we talk about it
644
00:30:51.089 --> 00:30:53.970
cryptically and that might be annoying for people listening, but
645
00:30:54.809 --> 00:30:57.180
I am the kind of person too where....
646
00:30:58.180 --> 00:30:59.880
We do that because we're not trying to be mean
647
00:31:00.039 --> 00:31:00.339
and shady.
648
00:31:00.359 --> 00:31:02.460
We're trying to be very respectful to that person, even
649
00:31:02.480 --> 00:31:08.190
though we don't speak. Um, I, every time my phone
650
00:31:08.250 --> 00:31:10.890
buzzed with a text message, I hoped that it was
651
00:31:11.130 --> 00:31:14.410
like that, that relationship meant a lot to me. And
652
00:31:14.509 --> 00:31:18.339
I was holding on to when are they going to
653
00:31:18.970 --> 00:31:21.539
reach out so we can talk about this? When are
654
00:31:21.559 --> 00:31:25.670
they going to, and, and, Two and a half weeks
655
00:31:25.730 --> 00:31:28.549
went by that we hadn't spoken. And I'm not that
656
00:31:28.589 --> 00:31:30.789
kind of person. If we have an issue, if Nell
657
00:31:30.829 --> 00:31:32.710
and I have an issue, we don't go to bed
658
00:31:32.730 --> 00:31:35.789
before we talk about it. If you and I, which
659
00:31:35.809 --> 00:31:37.450
we've never really had an issue.
660
00:31:37.519 --> 00:31:39.119
No, I've thought about it. I was like, I don't
661
00:31:39.140 --> 00:31:41.480
think Donald and I have ever had even a moment
662
00:31:41.519 --> 00:31:42.240
of being annoyed.
663
00:31:42.259 --> 00:31:46.680
Yeah. But if that happened at some point, I would...
664
00:31:47.359 --> 00:31:49.339
maybe be able to give it a day. But at
665
00:31:49.380 --> 00:31:51.619
some point I'd be like, girl, I'm losing my mind.
666
00:31:51.660 --> 00:31:55.079
We have to talk through this. Like that's how I am.
667
00:31:55.079 --> 00:31:57.079
That was me with all of my friendships two years
668
00:31:57.119 --> 00:31:59.420
ago when people wouldn't answer the phone. And I'm not
669
00:31:59.460 --> 00:32:01.619
saying that to throw shade. It was so devastating for
670
00:32:01.740 --> 00:32:04.819
me because I'm like, pick up your phone. I don't
671
00:32:04.900 --> 00:32:07.299
like the friendship means so much to me. Like, let's
672
00:32:07.420 --> 00:32:10.660
talk this through. Like, let's get back on the same page.
673
00:32:11.089 --> 00:32:12.690
I'm not trying to do this in a text where
674
00:32:12.710 --> 00:32:15.430
tone can be taken the wrong way, or I'm not
675
00:32:15.450 --> 00:32:18.589
trying to let time go by where we can get upset.
676
00:32:19.369 --> 00:32:23.210
And yeah, I couldn't get people to pick up the phone.
677
00:32:23.279 --> 00:32:25.339
And it was just like, that was so hard now.
678
00:32:25.960 --> 00:32:26.279
Okay.
679
00:32:26.440 --> 00:32:28.680
Speaking of cryptic, I'll just say this. So there's somebody
680
00:32:28.700 --> 00:32:32.549
that I finally, I guess, had to had to draw
681
00:32:32.569 --> 00:32:34.430
a line in the sand with and i just was
682
00:32:34.490 --> 00:32:39.630
like i just sort of stopped responding and i was
683
00:32:39.650 --> 00:32:41.210
having a lot of feelings about a lot of different
684
00:32:41.250 --> 00:32:45.930
things and the person was like well i don't know
685
00:32:45.950 --> 00:32:48.470
how to communicate should we and i was like i
686
00:32:49.190 --> 00:32:54.039
just need space i don't feel like talking this is
687
00:32:54.160 --> 00:33:00.859
this is something that's been talked to death yeah Nothing
688
00:33:00.940 --> 00:33:04.160
that we say will get me the answers that I
689
00:33:04.220 --> 00:33:09.420
want or need. And the situation isn't going to change.
690
00:33:10.019 --> 00:33:12.960
So there's nothing left. I just got nothing left to say.
691
00:33:13.259 --> 00:33:13.539
Yeah.
692
00:33:13.579 --> 00:33:16.059
Like that's sort of where I'm at is like I
693
00:33:16.099 --> 00:33:17.440
don't want to hear it anymore. I don't want to
694
00:33:17.480 --> 00:33:19.440
hear the half answer.
695
00:33:19.460 --> 00:33:20.900
I don't. Right.
696
00:33:21.759 --> 00:33:25.640
So I guess like I have felt bad about it
697
00:33:25.720 --> 00:33:29.589
because I'm like do I owe the person the conversation?
698
00:33:31.549 --> 00:33:33.380
But I'm like, there's nothing that's going to come from it.
699
00:33:34.150 --> 00:33:38.230
And so it's just like, by the way, it takes
700
00:33:38.269 --> 00:33:40.069
a very long time to get me to that point.
701
00:33:40.890 --> 00:33:42.819
Like it takes a lot to push me to the
702
00:33:42.880 --> 00:33:46.170
point of like, I just, like it's almost like a,
703
00:33:46.299 --> 00:33:47.160
it's like a defeated.
704
00:33:47.180 --> 00:33:47.839
Yeah.
705
00:33:48.079 --> 00:33:49.240
It's like I got nothing left.
706
00:33:49.279 --> 00:33:49.940
Or depleted.
707
00:33:49.960 --> 00:33:54.420
Yeah, maybe that depleted. Like there's just nothing. I've given
708
00:33:55.789 --> 00:33:57.609
every last bit.
709
00:33:58.109 --> 00:33:58.390
Yeah.
710
00:33:59.230 --> 00:34:02.660
So it is hard to go like, Oh, let's not like,
711
00:34:02.759 --> 00:34:04.539
it is hard to be in that. Like, I don't
712
00:34:04.579 --> 00:34:07.720
want to talk space, but also I just don't want
713
00:34:07.740 --> 00:34:13.389
to talk. So I think again, it's, there are certain
714
00:34:13.429 --> 00:34:19.769
circumstances like yours that warranted a conversation. That person should
715
00:34:19.789 --> 00:34:21.630
have picked up the phone and had a conversation with you.
716
00:34:21.789 --> 00:34:24.849
Even if that conversation was going to be, this friendship
717
00:34:24.889 --> 00:34:25.880
doesn't work for me anymore.
718
00:34:26.280 --> 00:34:26.530
Right.
719
00:34:27.239 --> 00:34:30.860
Ridiculous, but okay. That warranted a conversation. Yeah. Yeah.
720
00:34:32.639 --> 00:34:40.340
I think in, you know, the truth, these are examples
721
00:34:40.840 --> 00:34:45.760
of having to, I guess, each person having to do
722
00:34:45.800 --> 00:34:50.630
what they have to do. My friend who just didn't
723
00:34:50.670 --> 00:34:54.489
want to talk. And what bothered me the most also
724
00:34:54.550 --> 00:35:00.530
for context is the last text that I got, she
725
00:35:00.550 --> 00:35:04.360
accused me of being rude. belittling and manipulative.
726
00:35:04.489 --> 00:35:05.260
Absolutely not.
727
00:35:05.550 --> 00:35:09.070
And so when you say I'm doing that and you
728
00:35:09.110 --> 00:35:11.329
don't tell me how, you don't give me a chance
729
00:35:11.369 --> 00:35:16.010
to either clarify whatever made you feel that way or
730
00:35:16.869 --> 00:35:19.969
apologize if I see that there was this part that
731
00:35:20.030 --> 00:35:23.889
I need to apologize for, which I do. Like most
732
00:35:23.929 --> 00:35:26.329
of the time I find a place when there's conflict
733
00:35:26.369 --> 00:35:28.309
to say I could have handled this better or said
734
00:35:28.349 --> 00:35:31.949
this better. But You just throw accusations at me and
735
00:35:31.989 --> 00:35:33.630
then say, I don't want to talk, give me space.
736
00:35:33.710 --> 00:35:37.750
And then you wait for several weeks. And usually we
737
00:35:37.809 --> 00:35:41.440
talk several times a week, if not daily, we touch base.
738
00:35:41.880 --> 00:35:46.179
That isn't fair. And so I guess the hard truth
739
00:35:46.300 --> 00:35:49.199
is without emotion, if that's what that person needed to do,
740
00:35:49.239 --> 00:35:50.949
then after two and a half weeks, I did what
741
00:35:51.010 --> 00:35:53.690
I needed to do, which would say, I've waited long enough.
742
00:35:53.769 --> 00:35:55.929
Either we have a conversation now or there's nothing to
743
00:35:55.969 --> 00:36:00.880
talk about. And so I guess in your situation too, different. You, what,
744
00:36:01.780 --> 00:36:04.579
what you have to give is you've given it all.
745
00:36:04.619 --> 00:36:05.400
You don't have anything else.
746
00:36:05.539 --> 00:36:06.039
I got nothing.
747
00:36:06.460 --> 00:36:09.219
And that it, you know, and so.
748
00:36:09.440 --> 00:36:11.940
And that's also okay. Right. Like.
749
00:36:12.559 --> 00:36:12.780
Right.
750
00:36:12.960 --> 00:36:16.659
It's allowed to be, I gave it my all and
751
00:36:16.760 --> 00:36:18.670
now I quit.
752
00:36:19.250 --> 00:36:19.550
Yeah.
753
00:36:19.809 --> 00:36:22.269
Like, and it's not a quitting situation. It's just a
754
00:36:22.329 --> 00:36:29.710
walking away from something that actually was probably bringing more
755
00:36:30.969 --> 00:36:37.309
pain and hurt. And like, then it was providing fulfillment, happiness, goodness.
756
00:36:37.409 --> 00:36:39.969
And it's hard to say that, but it's like, things change,
757
00:36:40.010 --> 00:36:44.210
friendships change, relationships change. And then you start to look
758
00:36:44.269 --> 00:36:44.769
at things and go.
759
00:36:44.789 --> 00:36:47.469
Oh, wait. Oh, yeah.
760
00:36:48.150 --> 00:36:51.630
Oh, I probably should have recognized things sooner.
761
00:36:51.949 --> 00:36:57.550
You know, what's interesting is the conversation started about quitting,
762
00:36:57.610 --> 00:37:00.690
but it really is about boundaries in a way. Like,
763
00:37:02.289 --> 00:37:09.090
Because a boundary is actually not about other people. It's
764
00:37:09.130 --> 00:37:15.489
about setting guidelines that work for you. And people can
765
00:37:15.820 --> 00:37:20.639
use that in a manipulative way. But also, it serves
766
00:37:20.760 --> 00:37:24.199
us like for me, like if I jump to the
767
00:37:24.239 --> 00:37:27.619
veganism again. that just wasn't a boundary that I needed
768
00:37:27.659 --> 00:37:32.090
for myself anymore. So I changed my boundaries around what
769
00:37:32.170 --> 00:37:34.690
I ate and my nutrition, where someone might be like,
770
00:37:34.730 --> 00:37:38.349
you quit being vegan. But I just continued to listen
771
00:37:38.730 --> 00:37:44.320
to what was right for me to do. And so
772
00:37:44.360 --> 00:37:48.280
I think that really that's the conversation. But I think
773
00:37:48.320 --> 00:37:53.769
that an important boundary is, For a decent person, they
774
00:37:53.789 --> 00:37:59.659
should always consider their commitment. And so... Why are you laughing?
775
00:38:00.000 --> 00:38:05.159
So I just mean like if you are... For example,
776
00:38:05.260 --> 00:38:09.949
us with this podcast. Yeah. If you suddenly... Like if
777
00:38:10.070 --> 00:38:12.230
let's say one of us no longer wanted to do
778
00:38:12.269 --> 00:38:16.710
the podcast, I would expect... neither of us to just say,
779
00:38:16.809 --> 00:38:17.110
I'm done.
780
00:38:17.130 --> 00:38:18.070
Oh, right. No.
781
00:38:18.110 --> 00:38:20.989
You know what I mean? Like there should be a conversation.
782
00:38:21.030 --> 00:38:24.690
There should be a talk about a strategy. No, neither
783
00:38:24.730 --> 00:38:25.780
of us should feel trapped.
784
00:38:25.880 --> 00:38:26.090
Right.
785
00:38:26.110 --> 00:38:27.360
Just like a relationship.
786
00:38:27.500 --> 00:38:27.760
Yeah.
787
00:38:27.960 --> 00:38:31.460
But also we should show the respect to our commitment
788
00:38:31.500 --> 00:38:34.420
to each other and to the listeners and to the
789
00:38:34.440 --> 00:38:35.000
whole thing.
790
00:38:35.039 --> 00:38:36.199
We're not going anywhere, by the way, guys.
791
00:38:36.219 --> 00:38:39.320
Yeah, we're not. It's just an example. It's another example.
792
00:38:39.469 --> 00:38:39.639
Yeah.
793
00:38:41.090 --> 00:38:41.550
By the way.
794
00:38:41.570 --> 00:38:44.610
They're like, Donald was gone. Autumn tried new people in
795
00:38:44.630 --> 00:38:47.179
the chair. No, he was just on vacation.
796
00:38:47.260 --> 00:38:50.219
But that's an example to me of something like where
797
00:38:50.239 --> 00:38:54.119
the commitment to something you started, even if it's no
798
00:38:54.159 --> 00:38:58.539
longer working for you, should affect, if you're a decent person,
799
00:38:58.960 --> 00:39:02.920
how you handle it. And I think that that's something
800
00:39:02.940 --> 00:39:05.420
that a lot of people, when they quit, they just
801
00:39:06.159 --> 00:39:09.389
like drop it, abandon it. Like, and that's the thing,
802
00:39:09.449 --> 00:39:15.829
maybe quitting versus abandoning something. And I don't know, it's
803
00:39:15.889 --> 00:39:17.710
a lot. My mind's going like this.
804
00:39:17.789 --> 00:39:20.110
It's a little ping pongy because even as you say,
805
00:39:20.130 --> 00:39:23.030
you're like, oh, if you're a decent person, honor your commitment.
806
00:39:23.070 --> 00:39:26.469
I'm like, okay. But then somebody, again, if you go
807
00:39:26.510 --> 00:39:28.650
back to a relationship side, they're going to be like, well,
808
00:39:29.050 --> 00:39:31.360
I'm a decent person. So I made the commitment. So
809
00:39:31.400 --> 00:39:33.920
I guess I have to stay. And it's like, no,
810
00:39:33.940 --> 00:39:40.320
we said, again, our unhinged, uneducated advice, unprofessional advice is
811
00:39:40.380 --> 00:39:43.380
that it has to work for both people.
812
00:39:43.579 --> 00:39:43.900
Yes.
813
00:39:44.199 --> 00:39:46.199
You don't quit on a job if somebody is expecting
814
00:39:46.219 --> 00:39:48.940
you to show up. It would be like a background
815
00:39:48.980 --> 00:39:51.480
cast member just not showing up one day, which actually
816
00:39:51.500 --> 00:39:54.400
happened on Country Heat the last day, which was fine.
817
00:39:54.420 --> 00:39:56.320
We had a big cast. But like one guy just
818
00:39:56.360 --> 00:39:58.780
decided he didn't feel like doing it the last day
819
00:39:58.820 --> 00:40:00.670
and he just didn't show up. And it was like–
820
00:40:00.690 --> 00:40:01.829
That's crazy.
821
00:40:01.849 --> 00:40:04.710
In this town too? Yeah. How do you like your reputation?
822
00:40:04.829 --> 00:40:09.559
Right. Like there's always a way to exit something. In
823
00:40:09.599 --> 00:40:11.929
a positive way. I think that's the biggest thing that
824
00:40:12.070 --> 00:40:13.769
I would take away from it is there's always a
825
00:40:13.789 --> 00:40:16.349
way to exit in a positive way. Exit a relationship
826
00:40:16.389 --> 00:40:19.070
in a positive way. Exit a job. Exit a friendship.
827
00:40:19.750 --> 00:40:23.809
Whatever it might be. With doing as little damage as possible.
828
00:40:23.829 --> 00:40:27.059
That's not saying it wouldn't do some damage. Right? Like
829
00:40:27.599 --> 00:40:30.440
if a relationship is ending, it's very rare where both
830
00:40:30.480 --> 00:40:35.119
people are like, you're right. This sucks. We're out. We're
831
00:40:35.139 --> 00:40:38.019
both on the exact same page. Let's just be cool
832
00:40:38.059 --> 00:40:39.559
and be friends. You know, somebody's probably going to get
833
00:40:39.579 --> 00:40:42.199
their feelings hurt a little bit in the process. Or
834
00:40:42.420 --> 00:40:45.369
if you're leaving a job, give the two weeks notice
835
00:40:45.570 --> 00:40:49.369
or stick it out until the project that you're in
836
00:40:49.409 --> 00:40:51.969
the middle. Like don't leave somebody high and dry. Like
837
00:40:52.269 --> 00:40:53.469
still might be a pain in the ass. They need
838
00:40:53.489 --> 00:40:55.389
to go find a new employee, but give them time.
839
00:40:55.170 --> 00:40:55.730
To do it.
840
00:40:56.170 --> 00:41:00.559
There's a way to do it to keep your reputation intact, to,
841
00:41:01.260 --> 00:41:03.179
like you said, be a good person where it just,
842
00:41:03.980 --> 00:41:06.280
it doesn't just wreak havoc on somebody else's life. Like
843
00:41:06.320 --> 00:41:09.570
don't just go Don't be so selfish about it, I guess,
844
00:41:09.650 --> 00:41:11.610
is the thing of like, well, I don't want to,
845
00:41:12.329 --> 00:41:13.610
so I'm just not coming.
846
00:41:14.190 --> 00:41:17.070
Yeah. I wonder if you can think of a time,
847
00:41:17.230 --> 00:41:20.070
and I can, so I can say mine, if you
848
00:41:20.139 --> 00:41:22.480
need a second to think, where you quit something and
849
00:41:22.519 --> 00:41:24.619
if you had to do over again, you would do
850
00:41:24.679 --> 00:41:29.440
it differently. I was, this is years ago, and so
851
00:41:29.460 --> 00:41:34.360
a lot of it's being young and whatever, but I
852
00:41:34.400 --> 00:41:37.550
was in my hometown and I got a job as
853
00:41:37.590 --> 00:41:41.010
an insurance agent and I loved it because, you know,
854
00:41:41.090 --> 00:41:43.400
I was working in restaurants and like doing the grind.
855
00:41:43.440 --> 00:41:46.500
And all of a sudden this, the guy who, it
856
00:41:46.519 --> 00:41:49.539
was a state farm insurance office and the guy who, um,
857
00:41:51.039 --> 00:41:54.019
I guess the actual agent who like his name was
858
00:41:54.059 --> 00:41:58.190
on the, the, sign, hired me and wanted me to
859
00:41:58.230 --> 00:42:01.010
be a salesperson and I wasn't licensed or anything. So
860
00:42:01.030 --> 00:42:03.219
he started paying me. He put me in an, I
861
00:42:03.500 --> 00:42:07.280
had my own office. I felt like really like there
862
00:42:07.300 --> 00:42:10.599
was a lot of flexibility and he was paying me
863
00:42:10.659 --> 00:42:13.679
mostly to just study so I could pass the test
864
00:42:13.739 --> 00:42:20.480
and then like whatever. Wow. I loved it, but I took,
865
00:42:20.719 --> 00:42:23.780
you could take the test three times. I studied. I
866
00:42:23.820 --> 00:42:28.840
took the test twice and failed. And I just quit.
867
00:42:29.219 --> 00:42:31.150
And I pretty much quit with a phone call. I
868
00:42:31.170 --> 00:42:34.630
didn't give two weeks. I didn't say. And in my mind,
869
00:42:34.690 --> 00:42:37.670
I was like, I keep failing. I'm trying my hardest.
870
00:42:37.809 --> 00:42:39.849
I don't even have it. Like if I fail and
871
00:42:39.889 --> 00:42:41.530
just the third time and then I have to do
872
00:42:41.550 --> 00:42:43.519
the classes again and that's money. And I could tell
873
00:42:43.559 --> 00:42:47.579
they were disappointed that I wasn't passing. And I was
874
00:42:47.619 --> 00:42:52.260
just like, I can't do this. And so that's an example.
875
00:42:52.940 --> 00:42:56.719
in my mind of like, okay, I should have showed up.
876
00:42:56.920 --> 00:43:01.440
That person invested in me financially. They had a vision
877
00:43:01.500 --> 00:43:04.579
for me, which obviously wasn't meant for me. Right. But
878
00:43:05.320 --> 00:43:07.739
I should have, I think I should have honored that.
879
00:43:07.760 --> 00:43:09.679
And if I wanted to quit, I should have at
880
00:43:09.719 --> 00:43:12.639
least shown up, said thank you for the opportunity. Is
881
00:43:12.659 --> 00:43:14.619
there another way I can help for the next two weeks?
882
00:43:14.679 --> 00:43:16.980
Is it better for you if I just, financially, if
883
00:43:17.000 --> 00:43:18.380
you just, you know what I mean?
884
00:43:18.420 --> 00:43:18.699
Yeah.
885
00:43:18.719 --> 00:43:20.820
I think that's an example of a time that just
886
00:43:20.860 --> 00:43:25.070
comes to my mind of when I just quit and
887
00:43:25.369 --> 00:43:27.829
I could have handled it better. Do you have anything
888
00:43:27.869 --> 00:43:28.250
like that?
889
00:43:28.469 --> 00:43:30.309
Here's the thing. I'm sure there is. I am not
890
00:43:30.349 --> 00:43:32.360
so arrogant to say that, oh yeah, I've never.
891
00:43:32.380 --> 00:43:33.860
I've always handled it perfectly.
892
00:43:33.980 --> 00:43:38.059
Yeah. But I don't quit a lot of things. If
893
00:43:38.119 --> 00:43:40.000
I was on the dance team, I was there. If
894
00:43:40.079 --> 00:43:44.929
I was injured, I was freaking there. I quit college.
895
00:43:45.230 --> 00:43:47.570
I didn't finish. I had one semester to go, but
896
00:43:47.670 --> 00:43:52.409
also I quasi quit because my Ballet master told me
897
00:43:52.469 --> 00:43:54.329
he would not let me graduate with my degree.
898
00:43:55.630 --> 00:43:57.269
That's still fucking crazy.
899
00:43:57.489 --> 00:43:59.769
He brought me into the office and he said, in
900
00:43:59.889 --> 00:44:05.630
order to graduate with a bachelor in performing arts with
901
00:44:05.650 --> 00:44:08.250
your emphasis in dance, you have to be cast in
902
00:44:08.269 --> 00:44:09.030
the final show.
903
00:44:09.050 --> 00:44:09.980
And I won't cast you.
904
00:44:09.989 --> 00:44:12.750
I won't cast you. So what was I going to
905
00:44:12.849 --> 00:44:15.969
spend tuition for for another semester? He was never going
906
00:44:15.989 --> 00:44:18.429
to let me finish my degree. And that's what I
907
00:44:18.469 --> 00:44:20.369
had went to school for. I wasn't going to start.
908
00:44:21.460 --> 00:44:22.559
a different degree all over.
909
00:44:22.579 --> 00:44:24.659
Do you feel like he was targeting you for a reason?
910
00:44:24.719 --> 00:44:25.610
Oh, he hated me.
911
00:44:25.659 --> 00:44:25.989
Yes.
912
00:44:26.670 --> 00:44:30.989
Because I, okay. I love to dance. I love music.
913
00:44:31.050 --> 00:44:32.289
Like music moves me, right?
914
00:44:32.429 --> 00:44:32.869
Lyrics.
915
00:44:32.969 --> 00:44:34.769
Like, you know, me put on the right song.
916
00:44:35.170 --> 00:44:35.469
Yeah.
917
00:44:35.550 --> 00:44:38.909
I'm belted out. I'm going to dance it. I'm sorry.
918
00:44:38.949 --> 00:44:41.400
But these two that ran this department were fucking weird.
919
00:44:42.139 --> 00:44:46.179
Like we would go into choreography class. They wouldn't, we
920
00:44:46.199 --> 00:44:50.170
weren't allowed to use music to choreograph. They would, The
921
00:44:50.230 --> 00:44:52.409
modern dance teacher would take us outside and be like–
922
00:44:52.429 --> 00:44:53.650
Modern dances, I can't.
923
00:44:54.309 --> 00:44:54.610
I know.
924
00:44:55.070 --> 00:44:57.929
Well, that's not true though because like Alvin Ailey modern
925
00:44:57.949 --> 00:44:59.670
dance is insane.
926
00:44:59.730 --> 00:45:00.710
It's beautiful.
927
00:45:00.789 --> 00:45:04.440
It's– so cool to watch yeah so it can be
928
00:45:04.460 --> 00:45:06.320
yeah she would take us out i was like get
929
00:45:06.420 --> 00:45:08.679
off the weed bitch like she would take us outside
930
00:45:08.719 --> 00:45:11.019
and be like find an object and create a dance
931
00:45:11.059 --> 00:45:13.139
about it like we would be outside looking like we
932
00:45:13.179 --> 00:45:15.989
were high as kites because we're like looking at trees
933
00:45:16.050 --> 00:45:18.130
and like imitating like there's no fucking music i don't
934
00:45:18.170 --> 00:45:19.989
dance because i saw a goddamn tree like part of
935
00:45:20.050 --> 00:45:22.949
my language but it's still to this day fires me
936
00:45:23.190 --> 00:45:25.989
up or like same thing the ballet master we would
937
00:45:26.010 --> 00:45:30.260
be and he was He was our ballet master, but
938
00:45:30.300 --> 00:45:33.739
he was also the jazz teacher. There's only one type
939
00:45:33.780 --> 00:45:37.320
of music I could tell you that I absolutely cannot stand.
940
00:45:38.070 --> 00:45:41.690
And it's techno. It's like that techno house music. And
941
00:45:41.750 --> 00:45:45.130
he loved it. And he would do these weird, and
942
00:45:45.150 --> 00:45:48.329
I'm like, what is this? Can I get a lyric?
943
00:45:49.150 --> 00:45:53.710
Can you drop the beat at some point? Like, I just,
944
00:45:54.610 --> 00:45:57.929
so we would butt heads. And I started ballet really late.
945
00:45:58.670 --> 00:46:01.409
So because of that injury that I had with my
946
00:46:01.449 --> 00:46:03.090
hip when I was a kid, my parents wouldn't let
947
00:46:03.110 --> 00:46:04.869
me dance because they didn't know what was, anyways, all
948
00:46:04.889 --> 00:46:07.889
the things. So yes, he targeted me. He made it
949
00:46:07.949 --> 00:46:12.159
very clear that he didn't like me, which is weird
950
00:46:12.179 --> 00:46:14.449
because I'm like, I came to the audition and you
951
00:46:15.780 --> 00:46:18.260
extended me the offer to come to school. So you
952
00:46:18.320 --> 00:46:19.929
knew what I had to offer because I showed up.
953
00:46:19.980 --> 00:46:21.920
You knew what my ballet level was. You knew I
954
00:46:21.960 --> 00:46:25.650
was a jazz dancer. That's what my passion was. And
955
00:46:25.670 --> 00:46:27.789
then it just was never good enough. And again, he
956
00:46:27.849 --> 00:46:31.820
just tore me down emotionally like constantly. He would embarrass
957
00:46:31.840 --> 00:46:35.159
me in front of the class all the time. And
958
00:46:35.179 --> 00:46:37.619
I just– I got to the point where I just
959
00:46:37.719 --> 00:46:40.599
fucking hated it. Like he stole my spirit from me
960
00:46:40.699 --> 00:46:43.000
on it. And so I quit. Like I left with
961
00:46:43.059 --> 00:46:45.369
a semester to go. So do I wish I had
962
00:46:45.409 --> 00:46:50.059
the degree? Yes. Yes. And I actually went to college.
963
00:46:50.119 --> 00:46:52.340
So I took a semester off. I went back to college.
964
00:46:52.360 --> 00:46:55.239
I thought about becoming a physical therapist for dancers, like
965
00:46:55.260 --> 00:46:58.630
for dancers with injuries. So I started that. But when
966
00:46:58.670 --> 00:47:00.710
you pivot from a bachelor in the fine arts to
967
00:47:00.750 --> 00:47:02.909
a different kind of major, there were all these classes
968
00:47:02.949 --> 00:47:07.329
I didn't have to take. Like just all the gen eds.
969
00:47:07.369 --> 00:47:09.250
There were certain gen eds I didn't have to take
970
00:47:10.010 --> 00:47:12.969
as a bachelor in the fine arts because there were
971
00:47:13.070 --> 00:47:15.730
so many fine arts classes I had to take. And
972
00:47:15.769 --> 00:47:19.519
I was like– biology and dah, dah, dah. And I
973
00:47:19.559 --> 00:47:21.320
don't want to do this. Like that's not, that's so,
974
00:47:21.519 --> 00:47:23.280
I was like sitting in a night class learning about
975
00:47:23.300 --> 00:47:25.139
the water cycle. And I was like, why am I
976
00:47:25.179 --> 00:47:30.590
spending time and money on this? And then I actually
977
00:47:30.630 --> 00:47:34.030
went back and I thought about doing entertainment law. And
978
00:47:34.210 --> 00:47:38.809
I did a semester as a undergrad for law. And
979
00:47:38.849 --> 00:47:42.530
same thing. I love the idea of it. And Like
980
00:47:42.570 --> 00:47:45.269
I loved the idea of negotiating deals and that kind
981
00:47:45.309 --> 00:47:47.469
of thing. But all the work that came before it
982
00:47:47.489 --> 00:47:48.610
and I was sitting there and I was trying to
983
00:47:48.630 --> 00:47:50.809
understand it in case law and all this stuff. And
984
00:47:50.849 --> 00:47:56.429
I was like, maybe this isn't for me. So maybe
985
00:47:56.570 --> 00:47:58.769
like there's a part of me that is like, could
986
00:47:58.789 --> 00:48:01.309
have been cool to have all that education. Really what
987
00:48:01.349 --> 00:48:03.530
I wish is that I wish I would have found
988
00:48:04.210 --> 00:48:08.230
exercise science or exercise physiology. But my school didn't have that.
989
00:48:08.750 --> 00:48:10.989
I wish I would have found that. And I wish
990
00:48:11.010 --> 00:48:11.909
I would have done that degree.
991
00:48:13.110 --> 00:48:13.320
Yeah.
992
00:48:13.550 --> 00:48:15.110
And so I've bought the books on it. Like I'll
993
00:48:15.170 --> 00:48:17.070
read them at now. I'll just, I'll read and I'll
994
00:48:17.130 --> 00:48:18.889
study it. I don't need to go back to college
995
00:48:19.050 --> 00:48:21.289
to learn it. I could get the books instead of
996
00:48:21.309 --> 00:48:24.630
my table and read them. But I do wish that
997
00:48:24.670 --> 00:48:28.679
I had finished college, but under the circumstances I was in,
998
00:48:28.710 --> 00:48:30.429
there was no way it was going to happen. Yeah.
999
00:48:31.550 --> 00:48:36.070
So. Well, I think that's good. Yeah. Like, cause you
1000
00:48:36.230 --> 00:48:40.340
obviously gave those things a try and knew it's in
1001
00:48:40.360 --> 00:48:41.880
the word, you know, and this could be a good,
1002
00:48:42.570 --> 00:48:45.960
Wrap it up in the words of Kenny Rogers. You
1003
00:48:45.980 --> 00:48:47.719
got to know when to hold them and know when
1004
00:48:47.739 --> 00:48:50.739
to fold them. Know when to walk away and bitch.
1005
00:48:51.000 --> 00:48:51.860
You better know when to run.
1006
00:48:51.880 --> 00:48:53.059
Know when to run, honey.
1007
00:48:53.079 --> 00:48:55.550
You better lace those Nikes up and say bye.
1008
00:48:56.070 --> 00:48:56.349
Yeah.
1009
00:48:57.050 --> 00:48:58.250
No, I like that. It's so true.
1010
00:48:58.710 --> 00:48:59.449
Yeah, you do.
1011
00:48:59.849 --> 00:49:05.389
That is a nice period on the end of this conversation.
1012
00:49:05.530 --> 00:49:08.340
Yeah. Quitting is okay. Just don't be an asshole about it.
1013
00:49:08.380 --> 00:49:11.829
I think that's my conclusion. That's my take on it.
1014
00:49:11.960 --> 00:49:13.070
I'm here for it. I like that take.
1015
00:49:13.360 --> 00:49:15.610
We'd love to hear y'all's take. And also if you
1016
00:49:15.630 --> 00:49:19.409
have any questions or any specific situation about, are you
1017
00:49:19.449 --> 00:49:23.369
thinking of quitting? something or want to hear our advice,
1018
00:49:23.489 --> 00:49:25.550
pretty much on anything, you can let us know at
1019
00:49:25.659 --> 00:49:30.119
everythingsperfectpodcast at gmail.com. Just send us a phone a friend.
1020
00:49:30.420 --> 00:49:34.000
Yep. Find us on Instagram, everythingsperfectofficial, and we will see
1021
00:49:34.039 --> 00:49:35.719
you guys next week. Bye. Bye.
1022
00:49:43.920 --> 00:49:44.659
We'll be right back.